Shuuichi’s eyes widened, taking Chihiro in, before he nodded, bowing to Chihiro as he said, “Of course. Secretarial Assistant Fujisaki. You assisted Secretary Chisa and were part of the administration team for the Luminary Escort Party. We’ve been concerned about you all. Your parties been missing for… awhile, now.”

“Unfortunately, the trip ended… poorly.” Chihiro said, a touch sadly, “But I-I’m relieved you’ve recalled me… I hope this isn’t presumptuous, but… I did always t-try to leave a good impression. I’m a diligent worker, and, well… u-um-”

“The fact that you were an administrative assistant to a party as incredibly important as the one sent to validate and get signed the treaty to the fifteen year war is a testament to her-”

“His.” Shuuichi corrected, before looking to Chihiro, “Sorry, unless I’m mistaken-”

Chihiro blushed slightly, before shaking his head, “No, him, thank you.”

Maki nodded, “is a testament to his ability and responsibility in the first place. And Head Secretary Tengan wouldn’t have allowed anyone on the administration team who was prone to subversion or had any signs of disloyalty to the work.”

Angry bell noises.

“Yes… independent or rebellious thinkers would have made his own betrayal more difficult.” Maki agreed, while Chihiro looked a little embarrassed. Chihiro needed to be seen as trustworthy right now, but… well, it was always a little embarrassing to essentially be called a ‘yes man’. 

“Even besides all that… you and I talked.” Shuuichi said, giving Chihiro a gentle look, “You were very kind. Even if I made you nervous.”

Chihiro laughed lightly at this, a pleased flush of red gracing their soft cheeks… but the cheery look dampened as Shuuichi said, “But… I also know… and, forgive me, but-”

“You can’t fight.” Maki pointed out, raising an eyebrow. “You famously can’t fight. Those two guardsman always sparred on your behalf, over the trip. The obnoxious one with the hair like corn, and the really stiff, loud one.”

“I know…” Chihiro smiled softly, walking up to Maki, taking her hands in his and beaming up at her, “That’s where it’s going to get complicated… and where I’ll need you.”

Looking shyly up at her, Chihiro said, “Miss Harukawa… may a memory of me merge with yours? With you? It will take a lot of effort on my part, but… if I can merge us and imprint the new person as a defense in his mind… a loyal, dedicated secretary with a fierce, dedicated assassin?” 

Chihiro laughed, before looking to Shuuichi, “...could you trust in that?”

Shuuichi’s eyes widened at that… before he looked at the memory of Maki. “Would you be okay with that? If I understand right… based on Kokichi’s memories of Alter Ego? The final result won’t be you. It will be someone else…”

Maki rolled her eyes, allowing Chihiro to keep holding her hand as she said, “I wasn’t expecting to end this conversation still existing… so, sure? Why not. What’s one more kid I’m responsible for.” Maki rolled her eyes, looking to Chihiro. “Do it.”

“...Would you like to say goodbye?”

“I’ve literally only existed for five minutes. You are all far too sentimental. Get this done.”

It was...interesting. All of the people who were a part of Alter Ego had shared memories with Kokichi, and he knew that Kaito, Maki, and Shuuichi had known Chihiro, Taka, and Mondo, at least. But seeing them interact as...close to as in-person as they could now? Even a polite, distant shared history…

...there was a sweet sort of warmth in Kokichi’s chest, hearing that Shuuichi and Chihiro had that sort of positivity between them, however brief it was. 

Kokichi was tempted to pipe up about Chihiro’s capabilities, but...it was the same reason he had asked Shuuichi about his own ability to be a protector. If Shuuichi didn’t believe they could fight the shadow man, then they wouldn’t be able to win, no matter how actually capable they were. Not without taking liberties with Shuuichi’s mind. 

...but Maki could. 

Shuuichi didn’t see her as invincible. But that meant a lot of things, and ‘going to lose a fight’ was, he’d wager, not a concept Shuuichi had adopted. 

Kokichi laughed a bit at Maki’s total disregard for sentimentality--and it likely helped that she was a memory, and not the actual Maki--and walked over out of the way, standing by Temp. Raising an eyebrow at his friend, Kokichi spoke softly. “When it’s not saving someone from death...what do you make of this?”

Temp shrugged, “This might sound cold, but don’t get confused… this isn’t life. They’re about to merge two memories together to make an advanced defense. It’s not anything unlike Saint Madison, or the… small version of your husband you’ve made. They more sophisticated the memory-- and merging two memories together like that will make it more sophisticated-- the more… ‘believable’ they become. Adaptable. But… they’re still merely small parts of Shuuichi himself, given personification. The Maki you’ve created in here is a mix of your own memories of her, and Shuuichi’s memories of her… but she is not Maki. She is still, essentially, Shuuichi. And, one day, she will rejoin his greater consciousness, and be complete again… but she’s not alive, independently. And neither will the person she and Chihiro will make be.”

“...that is why Alter Ego themselves is an abomination. They, for all intense and purposes… are alive. It’s an incredibly difficult thing for an Empath to do, to actually create life, and for that to happen, an Empath must first die. Life to create life… Chihiro, when Alter Ego was first created? Was very likely alive and well, strong enough to do something that difficult… but he sacrificed himself to create your mentor, while carrying with him the actual consciousness’s of Taka and Mondo… not memories. Not copies. He absorbed them, made them a part of himself, and then sacrifice that life to connect them to Hiro, absorbing himself into the psychic… Hiro himself had to sacrifice what must have been an enormous part of his own consciousness to sustain the connection… for Chihiro to achieve all of that? All four of those shards had to be incredibly strong… it should have failed. If any of them had buckled under the stress, Alter Ego would have fallen apart in the creation process… there’s a reason things like him aren’t common. It’s incredibly difficult… and mortally deadly. And the final result…”

Temp sighed, shaking his head, “... life wasn’t designed for things like them. I hope they will let me help them someday. Who knows what will become of them when Hiro dies...”

As Kokichi and Temp talked, Alter Ego, after a second, leapt out of Chihiro’s back, looking back at the memory he left behind, Chihiro giving him a fond look. And, taking a breath, Alter Ego closed their eyes, mentally preparing themselves. A huge burst of power… a new defense, capable of problem solving. Capable of adapting. Capable of anticipating.

A defense that Shuuichi could trust in. 

A defense that will protect him.

A defense that will defer to him.

Chihiro and Maki looked at each other… and an enormous push of power rippled out from Alter Ego. Out from Shuuichi. Out into the greater community. A bright light, a huge puff of air, like an explosion that caused no harm…

And when it all cleared… 

“Good day!” the...woman? Person. The secretary said, breaming at Shuuichi, before bowing low, wings spread out, horns protectively wrapped like a helmet around their temple, “Please refer to me as Griffin, Mr. Saihara. I’m happy to assist you. Please treat me well.”

Shuuichi gave them a stunned look… before nodding, bowing back, “Of course. Thank you for being here… um, may I ask-”

“The wings were Chihiro’s idea, to better go fetch books with, and the horns were Maki’s idea, to better fight with,” They explained, before cheerfully saying, “I can do this too!”

And their hands, soft and human, darkened and tightened into talon claws, sharp and strong as blades, as they said, “We figured, well… we’re imaginary, right? Why bother with human limitations. How do I look?” They asked, twirling a bit.

“Perfect.” Shuuichi smiled, bowing again, “Thank you.”

Alter Ego, in turn… their body started to tilt, swaying on their side, “...nnngh.”

It wasn’t new life, but...Kokichi still thought it was impressive, making a new memory-person. Merging two people to make someone entirely new…

Though, Kokichi would always be amazed with what Chihiro and the others had done to make Alter Ego. Taking what they were doing with the memories of Chihiro and Maki now and turning it up to eleven with real people. Saving Taka, Mondo, and himself from terrible deaths, making their own answer to stay together in the uncertainty of their afterlives, and joining Hiro too--all four of them able to still be themselves while also having made a new person entirely. Who may not have a physical body, but was just as alive as anyone as far as Kokichi was concerned. 

“...I suppose you could call it a miracle, though I don’t really mean it in the divine way,” Kokichi murmured. “There’s a lot of uncertainty, but...since they are alive? Since they’re here, and what’s done is done...I’m happy for it. Maybe one day they will ask you for some final peace, but...for now, I’m glad I get to be a part of their life.”

...what he didn’t say, even to Temp, who was a direct disciple of a god and believed in those practices vehemently, was...it was all made up anyway. Their world was just...some project among many created by a god, and all the other gods got to play in it, working around the rules humans made. So...while there literally were gods? There really was no ultimate truth. Just how people decided they wanted to live. 

So why couldn’t there be Alter Ego?

...admittedly, that all might be the extreme bias of someone who had been raised to believe that there was no cosmic truth in the first place. He was sure that if Kaito had learned all this, he’d find a completely different view to take out of it. One of the reasons that this world, this existence was so fun. 

Kokichi settled his musings to himself in time to see...to feel? To...everything, the immense surge of power that came from Alter Ego, Kokichi shielding his eyes for a moment, vaguely remembering the bright, golden light that had come from his creation of Saint Madison.

And instead of a large warrior, the person who was left was…

Kokichi grinned as he watched the new person, Griffin, make the most of their existence immediately, already getting a good feeling like they’d hit the mark. 

And Alter Ego having...a not much better reaction than his sold that idea too. 

Gasping softly, Kokichi dove to his mentor’s side, gently trying to ease Alter Ego to the ground. “Hey, hey, easy… Temp and I can finish things here, you can go back to Hiro…”

Alter Ego looked up blearily at Kokichi, their thin, furry chest moving a little too quickly, catching their breath as Kokichi gently lowered them down. They looked over at Griffin, who in turn, didn’t so much as glance in their direction. Beaming at Shuuichi, a focused, happy intensity in their gaze.

“...heh…” Alter Ego sighed, giving Kokichi a mildly amused look, “... I may have put in more energy than I needed to… I’ll admit… I want this to work. I want it to work so badly… a defense that can really, truly help him… the kind of defense that can help everyone… I could have tried putting less power into them, to see if a less comprehensive defense could have still done it, but…” Alter Ego sighed, their chest evening out, their breathing coming easier, “... I want this to work…”

Temp, giving the defense an interested look, the creation still excitedly talking to Shuuichi, showing off their ability to fly as they flapped their wings and hovered above him, knelt down beside Kokich and, for the first time, reached down to pet Alter Ego, “Being more thorough is preferable to less, especially considering we’re testing on a friend. We can experiment with lower power bursts in minds when we know for certain our baseline works. For now, it was an admirable decision… now, heed Kokichi. Get some rest. I will check on you tomorrow.”

Alter Ego looked up at the Templar, looking… small and thin. Against his hand… before nodding. “Okay.”

And Alter Ego was gone.

Kokichi nodded softly. “We’re not the type to do things by half measures… You promised to take good care of Shuu-chan, and you put your whole being into it. Doing that, choosing to do that, even if I know that’s the kind of person you are, means a lot to me. To Shuu-chan and the rest of our family, even if they might not be able to conceptualize it yet. Thank you, Alter Ego.”

And...despite the tension between them...Kokichi trusted Temp to look after Alter Ego. He’d probably make a trip over the next night to check in with them because Alter Ego was his friend and he was worried about them, but...he could rest easy, knowing that Temp was looking after them too. 

He sighed softly as Alter Ego left back to Hiro’s mind, looking up at Temp for a moment before getting back up and turning towards Shuuichi and Griffin. “You two look like you’re having fun,” he said with a small, slightly worried, but hopeful smile. Remembering the last member of their little party, Kokichi looked around for Chibi Kaito, smiling a little more as he saw him clinging onto Shuuichi’s leg. 

Reaching out to offer Chibi Kaito some elevation he asked, “Well, what do you think? Our Shuu-chan in good hands? That are sometimes claws?”

Kaito looked at Kokichi’s offered hand, before rubbing his face into Shuuichi’s leg a little more...before sighing, letting Big Shuuichi go and scurrying over to Big Kokichi, launching himself into his husbands arms and burying himself into his chest.

Watching Big Maki appear and then disappear so suddenly… she’d make fun of him and call him overly sentimental. But... he clung tightly to Big Kokichi and sighed.

（´＿｀）

Though, at the question of Griffin? Chibi Kaito peeked out of Kokichi’s chest, looking back at the person Maki had become… the way her eyes focused on him. Entirely attentive. Undistracted. 

For someone whose job it would be to attend to Shuuichi’s vast collection of knowledge, while at the same time protect him from mental abusers?

...Those claws were very legit.

Kaito looked up at Kokichi and nodded, giving him a grin. Chibi Kaito approved.

“Aww…” While supporting Chibi Kaito with one arm, Kokichi pat the small creature’s back with his other. A lot of emotions for such a little creature… He would be so happy when Maki came back, even if Kokichi didn’t want to spend any more time in his friends’ and partners’ minds than just...setting up their conditioning. But just knowing she was there would be enough for any of them, real or memory, to be happy. 

Laughing softly, Kokichi gave the tiny version of his husband a grin back before bowing his head a bit to Griffin. “Looks like we’re all expecting good things from you, Griffin. Thank you for your work.”

To Shuuichi, Kokichi gave his boyfriend a softer look. “...you good?”

Shuuichi finally looked away from Griffin, giving Kokichi an equally fond look in response as he said, “I… suppose I am. After this, I won’t really be conscious that Griffin is here… and if they are truly capable of affecting my conditioning…”

Shuuichi laughed lightly. “Then… I don’t know. I can’t even really conceptualize it. I… I guess I’m grateful. I am grateful.” Shuuichi sighed, heading over to Kokichi and-- to the absolute delight of a squished Chibi Kaito-- pulling him into a hug, “Thank you, Kokichi...”

In the hold, Shuuichi looked over to Temp and said… “I know I won’t remember our deal…”

Temp shook his head, “But I will, and I do not break trades. I assure you, I will tell you what’s been going on… but-” Temp gave Shuuichi a stern look, “...can I propose I tell you after you’ve given birth? We do not know how the waking version of you will react to the news...it might be safer for you to have such a difficult conversation after you’re settled and healed.”

Shuuichi frowned… clearly uncertain.

Kokichi relaxed into the hug, placing a covert kiss on Shuuichi’s cheek. If Griffin worked...then Shuuichi would be free. No more giving away his information in response to stimulus that was...random at times. Anyone speaking in an authoritative voice, sometimes. And while they all might just think that it was luck that it hadn’t gotten triggered...this was something more than worth doing. 

He’d pass on Shuuichi’s thanks the next time he saw Alter Ego. 

Rubbing Shuuichi’s back gently--still a little startled by Shuuichi’s lithe frame after having gotten used to his curves--Kokichi looked over at Temp. It was...a reasonable alteration. 

“...I’ve been doing this for a few months now--learning how to be an empath. Alter Ego is a good mentor...they make sure I don’t push my limits, make sure I’m not staying up all night. I’ll be okay for another two months. And maybe by then, we’ll actually be able to talk about this in the physical world.”

Something did ping in Kokichi’s head, though, and he pulled away from Shuuichi, still holding Chibi Kaito. He gave his boyfriend a serious, slightly guilty look. “But...this needs to be a secret. I don’t want to keep secrets from you guys, especially something as big as this...but it’s really dangerous for empaths to be public. For people to know about them. At...the very least...I want to have my memories and be strong enough to protect our family. And even then…” he sighed. 

“I don’t want to put you guys in danger… But if you’re going to know, then I don’t want Kai-chan to be the only one in the dark. But I need to wait.”

Shuuichi sighed, leaning back a bit, giving Chibi Kaito a somewhat wary look… before, much like he had with Alter Ego, he ‘pat pat’ Kaito’s head. Now, Chibi Kaito wasn’t simple. He wasn’t an animal… but he still beamed at the pats, because Kaito was gonna Kaito no matter what form he was in, not overly bothered as Shuuichi mused, “Kaito’s going to be so annoyed with us that he’s the last to know again… but, we’ll make him understand…”

“And I can keep a secret.” Shuuichi smiled, before saying more firmly, “And I will. Keep your secrets, Kokichi. I understand why you have to hide this. I understand because you understand… but you don’t even know your secrets. Not out in the waking world. And that just feels…. Dangerous to me. So… I don’t… really like the idea of holding off the information. I wish to protect you, before you can protect us…”

“...but.” Shuuichi sighed, lowering the brim of his hat, “...that’s me being paranoid. And selfish… I still want to know when it’s safe. But at the same time, I don’t want to put Miyako in danger with my reaction, and… I want to trust that you can handle this without me needing to… well, ‘be Shuuichi’.” Shuuichi smiled. A little sheepishly. “It’s hard not to want to put my hands all over this. A lack of trust in other people means everything becomes your personal responsibility… it’s an exhausting way to live. And I can't maintain it.” Shuuichi murmured.

“So… you can wait to tell me. And… you can tell me that I promised to leave the decisions regarding this in your hands. Maybe that will stop me from getting too fussy and involved…” Shuuichi laughed, “Maybe it won’t. But you can try it.”

Looking down at himself, Shuuichi sighed again. “...you should let me dissolve back into the greater consciousness, soon… I’ll miss looking like this. Feeling like this… but this can’t go one forever. You should go get some sleep soon, Kokichi.”

It was easy when he was awake. He didn’t have to worry about any of this, to fret over the state of the universe and the world around them. He didn’t remember so...there was nothing to tell. He didn’t have to worry about telling his partners that almost everyone in the Luminary Party had died, about telling them that he was an empath, a being with abilities over consciousness. He wasn’t betraying them if he couldn’t tell them. 

But soon...he would be. And letting Shuuichi know too… He didn’t want to leave Kaito out. 

...but...maybe he could put it off for another two months. 

Kokichi gave his boyfriend a soft, adoring look. “Thank you… I promise, I’ll be alright. And once I remember, and Temp tells you...I’ll explain everything I can. I don’t take joy in keeping you guys in the dark…”

Quirking a bit of a smile, Kokichi leaned in to kiss Shuuichi’s kiss one more time. “Alright. I love you, Shuu-chan. I’ll see you in the morning.”

Releasing the memory, letting Shuuichi fade as he wished, Kokichi sighed, creating a portal back to his own mind but tilting his head a little at Temp. “You heading back to your own?”

“I believe so. I still have… so much paperwork I have to work on for the adoption agency.” Temp sighed, running a hand through his hair. “And now that I know Kaito apparently thinks I’m stupid, I have to make extra effort to prove myself now, apparently.” 

Shuuichi laughed lightly, shaking his head, “You can try to impress him with intelligence, but honestly, the quickest way to Kaito’s heart is just to keep talking to him. Kaito will find something to admire or love about you… you just have to keep feeding him information. He’ll find his own reason to like you.”

Kokichi snorted softly, though he gave Temp a sympathetic look. “I’m still rooting for you. And Shuu-chan’s right. Kai-chan has a lot of love to give--you just have to get to know each other. I know you’ll ace the interviews...because out of everything, you really do want to love Bonus and give them a good life. To take care of them. And with a genuine wish like that...the rest will fall into place, because you’re willing to work for it.”

“...I really should get to sleep, though. I got really tired from dancing tonight…”

Temp nodded, “I’ll keep all that in mind… Kokichi, get some rest. Shuuichi… I hope you will have no need to see me like this anytime soon. Griffin, stay diligent.” Temp instructed.

Griffin’s cheerful, intense eyes glanced at Temp, before nodding, saying brightly, “Okay! I shall do my duty! He’s safe in my hands!”

“I’m… I’m sure.” Temp said, and then he was gone.

Shuuichi chuckled watching this, looking to Griffin, “I think you unsettled him.”

“I think I may be unsettling.” Griffin said with a delighted little giggle, “But I am devoted to you, Mr. Saihara. You can have faith in me. I will not let you down.”

“... I like them.” Shuuichi grinned, before looking to Kokichi, “Goodnight.”

In some ways, Griffin almost reminded Kokichi of Katsuki. But they were a person all their own, and he believed in them. 

Leaning in for one last kiss, Kokichi held up Chibi Kaito to give Shuuichi a farewell kiss too before he waved and stepped through the portal back into his mind, letting himself fade to black to try and actually get some good sleep that night.

-

Shuuichi was getting… notably more tired.

He had been feeling it a little bit more every day for a long time now, but for some reason, today… it was like his body was just going to collapse on itself. Or, well, no, that wasn’t right… he wasn’t going to collapse, but more just… let himself fall. His willpower to carry himself just finally giving out. He felt exhausted, both mentally and physically, and gave less of a shit about overcoming that exhaustion every day. He was tired…

...he might not… have too many classes left in him before he had to stop.

Shuuichi frowned, miserable at that idea, but… god, even getting down the stairs felt like a herculean effort every day. Getting down the stairs, walking to the compass, sitting through class, walking back, going up those stairs… and that was just to get to school. Shuuichi was about ready to tell Kaito to go fuck himself in the morning, going down and then up for training, and he still tried to go down for dinner, and then up, and…

Shuuichi looked at the time, saw there was still a half hour left of class today, and realized he just couldn’t do it. He couldn’t. If he didn’t start walking home now, he wasn’t going to make it later. He needed to leave.

Quietly, whispering to Drake he’d see him tomorrow-- he still planned to come to class tomorrow, he just… he just couldn’t stand any more today-- Shuuichi packed up his things as the teacher spoke and left. Heading out of the building, on his way off campus. Hopefully he’d catch Kokichi on the way to picking him up, so his partner wouldn’t arrive and worry where he had gone. He just needed too… needed too…

...fuck, he needed to sit down.

Shuuichi didn’t get far before he was sitting at a bench, miserably staring at his feet. Shit… he just didn’t have any willpower left. His body could physically keep going, Shuuichi was sure, but fuck he just… didn’t want to. It hurt to move. He’d get up and go when it stopped hurting. He knew it wasn’t going to stop, but he’d get up and go when it did, okay!?

Shuuichi felt the anger rush through him and then leave just as quickly, sighing as he leaned back in the bench. He couldn’t stay here forever… he needed to-

“Uh… hey.”

Shuuichi looked up, to see a frustrated, nervous John standing above him. A bead of sweat on his forehead, which was also a little red, as if he had just been running. Shuuichi felt his chest square, and he gave John an openly annoyed look, “Yes?”

“Can…” John sighed, “Can I sit with you?”

-

Shuuichi...wasn’t going to finish the semester. It was pretty obvious, and Drake figured Shuuichi had worked something out with the professor to get partial credit or something, since his due date was right around the end of the term. But...it really was looking like Shuuichi wasn’t going to last much longer from now. The way he struggled to get up and down from his seat, the way Drake always found him panting in the morning, a dreading look when he left in the afternoon…

So it wasn’t much of a surprise when Shuuichi left in the middle of class, that same sort of exhausted dread in his face. Really, the only thing that surprised Drake was connecting a few things in his head, which chimed together when he saw John get up and leave too. 

Honestly, Drake still felt the impulse to go after him, be nearby so Shuuichi had some back up...but he knew his friend didn’t really need it. If anything, Shuuichi was going to give John a hard time. And...Shuuichi would probably appreciate being able to copy notes from the part of the lecture he missed than to have Drake “overhear” not...the best experiences. 

But John was just kind of an asshole, not dangerous, so...it was their businesses. 

Now, these notes...gotta make sure these notes are neat. 

-

...he hadn’t gotten a chance to talk to Shuuichi about the John thing. He hadn’t been able to get Shuuichi alone during training, and they’d planned to go to therapy right after Shuuichi’s class and...well, Shuuichi had left early, so they just got drinks before heading to Dr. Mariah’s office and…

...he didn’t want to bring it up for the first time in front of Kaito. It wasn’t fair to him or Shuuichi. 

...but even before he hadn’t gotten a chance, Kokichi had just...woken up feeling guilty. He figured about the John stuff, but...it was just...nebulous. A bad feeling hanging over him all day. Hopefully therapy might help some of that…

“Do you think she actually has a receptionist?” Kaito asked, as they waited in the lobby. Looking curiously over at the desk, once again empty.

“What, you mean like…” Shuuichi asked, eyes closed, leaning back into the chair, looking vaguely like he was going to take a nap right then and there.

“I mean, like maybe she’s fucking with us? Like, maybe it’s a bit… like, ooooh, that rascally therapist, always gone just when my costumers are coming and going.” Kaito theorized, raising an eyebrow, peering at the desk as if that alone woul give him some answers. “And then when we’re going she just does all the filing paperwork stuff herself and laughs?”

“Sounds like a lot of effort for a joke.” Shuuichi murmured.

“Paperwork’s a ton of work to go through by yourself too, though I know there are some therapists who opt to do it themselves… But I really don’t know what to think of our luck if she does have a therapist. Three sessions isn’t too much of a sample size, though.”

Kokichi sipped at his tea, looking at the empty desk with some minor intrigue. “...should we just knock when we’re here? It’s still a little before our appointment time, though… Should we just wait until then?”

“Mmmm, might be worth it... “ Shuuichi opened his eyes, looking over at the desk, “...maybe the receptionist is invisible.”

Kaito looked startled, before giving Shuuichi an incredulous look, “No.”

“Maybe.” Shuuichi smirked, “Maybe Dr. Mariah doesn’t realize only she can see the receptionist… maybe it’s a gho-”

“No. No. The receptionist is not a ghost, Shuuichi.” Kaito said, voice tight with frustration… though he suddenly gave the desk an increasingly worried look, “If the receptionist was a ghost, how come Dr. Mariah could see it and we can’t, huh?”

“Dr. Mariah can see her own kind.” Shuuichi explained easily.

“Our therapist is not a ghost, Shuuichi!”

“Who is shouting in my lobby?” Dr. Mariah called down, her small, clicking heels announcing her arrival before she got down here, giving the desk a quick glance before looking to the trio. “Oh, you’re all here already. Well, that’s alright, we can start early if you’re ready. Come on then.”

Kokichi couldn’t help but laugh a little at Shuuichi’s teasing, but...despite knowing how genuinely harmless this sort of teasing was, that guilty feeling only compounded. Feeling like...he was keeping secrets from Kaito, the important kind that he did not want to keep from his husband even more. And...he sort of was, with the John stuff, but…

Sighing, Kokichi lingered to help Shuuichi up, or at least be a bracing arm for him, before the followed the petite woman into her office, the fish as welcoming as ever, despite Kokichi’s dampened mood. “Good afternoon, Dr. Mariah.”

They sat down in what were becoming their regular seats, and Kokichi took his paper out, the thing pretty substantially filled with tallies. Really...one or two each for his partners, but in Kokichi’s two sections? The indirect questions part had a handful, but the mind reading one was...quite a bit more full. He hadn’t realized how often he did it, even if he was catching it almost before the words were out of his mouth in the past week. He hoped he wasn’t underestimating himself, compared with what his partners had observed. 

Shuuichi and Kaito, seeing Kokichi bring out his, both brought their own out as well, Shuuichi leaving his closed, on his lap, and Kaito opening his up and giving it a worried look. Dr. Mariah, of course, observed all of this, though she still opened up her small journal, reading through it real quick to make certain she was up to date with where they were last, before closing it up and putting it back into her pocket.

Leaning back into her large leather chair, the young looking woman gave them all a curious, dry look… before she said, “Before we move on with our conversation, is there a crisis?”

“Crisis?” Kaito asked, giving her a nervous, wary look, still feeling a little stressed by the paper in his hand.

“At the risk of sounding unprofessional and as young as I know I look… your…” Dr. Mariah gestured vaguely towards all of them, “...vibe’. Feels off. I’m getting the sense you three are more stressed this session than you have been the last two. Which, knowing how stressful your baseline is, is saying something.”

“So… before we start? Does anyone have anything they feel needs to be discussed first?”

She noted their reactions. Kaito, immediately, looked towards the other two. Shuuichi, in turn, tapped the armchair, a mildly frustrated look on his face.

Kokichi looked up in slight surprise, but his gaze fell to his lap, lips pulled in a thin line. And...after a moment of the tension being held in the room. “...I...I found something out last night that...I think might be a conversation we all need to have, but…” 

His eyes flicked to Shuuichi. “...but I don’t think I know everything about it, and...I think...it’s Shuu-chan’s thing to tell, and we didn’t get a chance to talk today so...I just feel bad about not talking earlier, and just...keeping Kai-chan out of the loop, I guess…”

“I’m sorry,” he murmured softly. “I don’t want to keep secrets from you…”

Kaito’s eyes widened, a stiffening in his body, his eyes darting between Shuuichi and Kokichi. Last night…?? At the dance???

...Kaito felt a sudden nervous fear rush through him. He immediately started playing with his knuckles, popping them, looking between the two again before asking, “Shuuichi?”

Shuuichi in turn… just looked confused. Shuuichi saw Kaito’s nervous, probing eyes and just, entirely perplexed, shrugged, “I… don’t know? What Kokichi’s talking about. Though…” he looked to Kokchi, giving him a genuinely annoyed look, “If he’s hinting at some secret I’m keeping, I’m not thrilled that you just decided to tell Kaito out of nowhere.”

“Are you keeping a secret from me, Shuchi?” Kaito asked quietly.

“I don’t think so?” Shuuichi answered, still baffled. Well, okay, sure, he was keeping several secrets from Kaito, but one that Kokichi knew about? What on earth was the other prince hinting towards?

“...Look, man, I promise I won’t get angry, but if… if… if this is another... ‘killing someone I care about’ thing…”

Dr. Mariah raised an eyebrow, “That’s a fairly extreme leap.”

“No, Kaito, I’m not keeping any assassination plans from you.” Shuuichi sighed, “I told you I wasn’t going to do that again.”

“...you didn’t, actually.” Kaito muttered quietly.

Kokichi winced. That was exactly why he had wanted to talk to Shuuichi alone first. He knew why Shuuichi hadn’t wanted to tell Kaito at first--Kaito really didn’t need an assault charge. And while he was doing better with his anger these days...it really was Shuuichi’s issue to tell. 

Kokichi played with the hem of his shirt. “I told you guys I ran into Kerry last night, right? Well...they were with their brother. John, from your class, Shuu-chan. And...I mean...I didn’t know what he looked like so...and Kerry kinda explained everything that had been going on.”

“John?” Kaito asked.

“John.” Shuuichi sighed, realizing, “Oh… John. You spoke to John last night? That explains that…”

“That explains what!?” Kaito suddenly shouted. Shuuichi gave Kaito a startled look, Dr. Mariah watching with interest, as Kaito grunted, suddenly shaking his head, saying, “Sorry, sorry, I’m not mad, I’m not, I’m just… could you guys not fucking speak circles around me?”

“... It’s not a huge deal, Kaito-”

“Great! Then let’s just go ahead and tell Kaito!” 

Dr. Mariah asked, “So, is keeping secrets from…” she glanced at Kaito, “...each other? An issue?”

“Can we get into that after we talk about John?” Kaito asked, looking increasingly stressed, “Who is John and why can’t I know about it!?”

Shuuichi sighed, “...Before we start talking about John, I want to start with what happened today. Everything John did? He apologized to me today about it. He caught me outside on a bench when I was resting, asked to sit with me… I know it’s been something he’s been trying to do for awhile, but…” Shuuichi shrugged, smirking a little, “I liked making him sweat for it. He’s such an angry, proud idiot… there’s nothing more fun than watching him get frustrated with the class, act all confident and cocky about his answer, only to watch him get it wrong over and over. I think he got overconfident from his last degree tract. Well, sucks for him. If he didn’t want to be bad at his new career, he shouldn’t have changed over.”

Kokichi could only wince in the face of Kaito’s frustration. And that was why he didn’t want to keep secrets from Kaito. It really wasn’t fair, keeping him in the dark, especially when they’d all chosen to trust each other, and part of that was trusting that Kaito wouldn’t leave in a rage to pummel anyone who said anything cruel to him or Shuuichi. 

And what John had said to Shuuichi was...way out of line. Horrible for Shuuichi, and bad for any legitimate sex workers too, which was why Kokichi had a feeling Behemoth called it out so much. But...it was likely the reason John was in these, apparently, new classes too. Still his own fault…

...but Kokichi was glad to hear that he had apologized, likely spurred on by seeing Kokichi at the dance. 

“To start explaining, I guess…” Kokichi looked over at Kaito, an apologetic look in his eyes. “The night we went to the theater, to see Hina and Sakura’s play… Shuu-chan and I took a bathroom break before we left, remember? And...apparently, this guy, John, was in line behind us…”

Shuuichi… wasn’t looking forward to this. 

And, that was why he sighed, looking vaguely annoyed, ignoring the nervous feeling in his gut as he said through a layer of carefully constructed indifference, “He’s a dumb, frat boy who…” Shuuichi frowned, giving Kaito a nervous look, some of that indifference factoring, “...”

Kait, seeing Shuuichi hesitate, suddenly threw a grin on his face. Pulling back, not leaning against his knees now, Kaito suddenly did all the little things he did when he was trying to make himself appear smaller, less dangerous as Kaito loosened his shoulders, as he leaned slightly away from all of them, resting against the arm chair as he pulled up a leg, saying, “Look, it’s fine. It’s fine. I’m not angry, I won’t be angry. You said whatever this is, he already apologized… today! Even though this happened…” A small twitch in the vein on Kaitoo’s forehead, “...months ago…I’m good!”

Dr. Mariah felt her notebook in her pocket warm.

Shuuichi, in turn, didn’t look convinced… but he just sighed, “John was apparently under the impression that anyone from Luminary was, well, Atuan… which, basically, true. Legally, anyway. But, he was also under the impression that Atuan’s all… are willing to sell their bodies, as part of their religion. And he…” Shuuichi frowned, his shoulders tensing, clearly still frustrated by this memory despite having gotten to a comparatively better place with John, “... asked how much for my services.”

“Before you say anything, Mr. Bullworth-- Priest Bullworth-- overheard this and essentially set me off to have a conversation with John himself. It was handled already, I didn’t see him in the crowd again for the rest of the night, and… well, considering the size of our good priest...” Shuuichi relaxed a little, smiling a bit, “I’m sure it was handled that night, regardless of you interfering, Kaito. It was dealt with. You don’t have to do anything…”

Kaito… grit his teeth… hands tightening into fists… before he mutetered, “Fucking god damn it, give me a second.” 

Dr. Mariah watched as Kaito stood up from the couch, reaching into his pocket and taking out the meditation stone, heading over to the fish tank and, without looking at the fish, he started to mutter things to himself, fussing with the stone.

“... so.” Dr. Mariah said, looking between Shuuichi and Kokichi, “Shuuichi, you were sexually harassed at a theater, and then joined a class with the harasser? That sounds… stressful. Why did you allow that?”

Shuich shrugged, “I was pretty embarrassed when I saw him, but… well,  wasn't as bothered by then. And, Kokichi suggested I ask to be put in a new class or have him moved or something, but, honestly, I found something really appealing in just… having so many opportunities to embarrass him. I mean, that was what he had done to me… I was embarrassed. It was nice to get the chance to do the same to him.” Shuuichi said, “And, well, over time… I mean, like I said, I noticed he was nervous around me, kept trying to pull me into conversations… the more uncomfortable I saw he was around me, the easier it was to feel comfortable around him.” 

Looking over to Kaito, he said softly, “And I didn’t want Kaito to get into trouble putting him into his place… I’d rather be embarrassed than Kaito get into trouble defending me.”

Kaito grunted at that, now looking up at the fish, his reflection on the glass clearly unhappy with this.

Kokichi sighed and...well, he was glad that Shuuichi wasn’t feeling...threatened or embarrassed in his class, though he would hope their boyfriend would’ve brought it up if it had been an issue. 

...but he wouldn’t with Kaito...at least not before.

Kokichi looked up at Kaito’s reflection in the glass. “...I know how you guys regard...justice and vengeance and punishment and all that stuff is...different from how it tends to happen on an institutional and social level here. And...it does make me happy that John apologized to you without mentioning it. It means he’s not making excuses… But in Dicean justice...Kerry told me that Mr. Bullworth reported John to the university, and...that their family have been getting...comments.”

“So even if it’s not your own justice...Kai-chan. It’s done.”

Kaito looked over his shoulder, a curious look on his face.

Shuuichi, in turn… looked confused and then… suddenly deflated as he asked, sounding exhausted, “What? Reported to… what does that mean?”

“Sexual harassment is a very serious problem, Shuuichi, and it’s important to keep people accountable for it. If you’re a sexual harasser, there’s lots of methods to report that person in a way that will keep them accountable and help change their behavior.” Dr. Mariah explained, watching the exhausted look grow on Shuuichi’s face, “It sounds like what Mr. Bullsworth chose to do is report him to his university, who likely started an investigation into him and reported him to the greater community. Meaning anyone and everyone will likely be aware that he’s a danger to the community.”

“... But no one… asked me anything about it…”

“They either found other incidents in their investigation that confirmed his character, or he didn’t dispute it when accused.” Dr. Mariah said simply, “You didn’t need to be consulted.”

“...oh.” Shuuichi said simply. “...Okay.”

Now Kaito was giving Shuuichi an openly concerned look, before going to sit down at the couch, “...that’s good. Maybe that’s why he apologized in the first place?”

“Yeah, probably.” Shuuichi murmured. “Probably why he did a lot of things.”

“...Well, good. Fuck him.” Kaito offered, “Better to report him and stuff than have me attack him, right?”

Shuuichi’s eyes suddenly narrowed, “...Bullsworth reported him? There… oh. I thought… wait, do people know it was me?” Shuuichi suddenly asked, looking alarmed as he looked between Kokichi and Dr. Mariah, “Was my name put into this?”

Kokichi nodded softly. It was a good system, at least as seen through his own sensibilities. It was a warning, so no other people would be hurt by a harasser--or an abuser--and through that ostracization, the harasser would legitimately change their ways, having to prove back to the entire community--not just a few people--that they were safe to be around. 

...but knowing that none of that brought much security to his partners, and that some people took it as a moral high ground and condemned family along with the person who had actually done the deed… Kokichi wondered what would be the solution to try and fix that...it wasn’t fair. 

Kokichi looked over at Shuuichi’s alarm, immediately shaking his head. “No. For cases like this, victims’ names aren’t released unless they’re the ones to do it. So...only Mr. Bullworth, me, now Kai-chan and Dr. Mariah...and Yasu, I guess, know that you were one of the people he harassed. If you don’t want it to go public, then it won’t.”

Shuuichi relaxed, then nodded. Kaito gave him a long, worried look.. Before he said, “Look, it’s not your fault, you get that, right? He’s a fucking Dicean himself, he knew exactly what he was getting into, pulling that shit here. It’d be like feeling bad for someone losing a fucking finger back at home. They knew the risk.”

“I know… I’ve just been… making fun of him a lot for changing careers all semester…” Shuuichi muttered, running a frustrated hand over his face, “I thought he was doing something stupid, like moving from a business track to a guard track to, like… prove his toughness or something ridiculous like that. I wanted to make him feel small and stupid for doing that… I can’t believe he never said why he did it. I feel cruel…”

“So? Who cares. Fuck him.” Kaito grumbled, crossing his arms, “I hope this shit follows him forever. I hope it fucks up anything he ever tries to do.”

“... Will it?” Shuuichi murmured.

 Dr. Mariah shrugged, “It usually boils down to a gut instinct on the people who are actually, physically around him. If they feel he’s changed for the better? He’ll very likely live an entirely normal life, after this. If they feel like they see signs he hasn’t changed his ways? Well… let’s just say he has a lot of incentive to prove himself to everyone, from now on. But… you both must remember, this is something Diceans are used too. We have our own cultural norms, to deal with stuff like this. For most people, it will be enough to see him not repeating the actions over time. If you’re concerned… actually, mind reading.” Dr. Mariah chuckled, looking to Shuuichi, “My apologies… why are you concerned about this, Shuuichi? You’ve already seen for yourself, the positive effects of this type of punishment. He’s apologized to you on his own. That’s a clear sign of growth and personal change.”

“...he could have changed without...everyone knowing… I didn’t want to do that to him. It bothers me that Mr. Bullsworth did that on his own, without consulting me.” Shuuichi murmured.

Dr. Mariah smiled, something cold in her eyes as she said, “At the risk of upsetting you… Dicean justice system has very little to do with the victims. After a certain point, it’s really not about you. John was reported because his actions make our society collectively a worst place to live among. Reporting him was better for the collective. It didn’t need your approval.”

John was Dicean, he knew. So that was why Kokichi didn’t actually care that much about the treatment John himself was receiving. Having to change majors, likely being cut off from his peers… That was the consequence of hurting people. 

It was only the fact of not talking it over with his partners and the fact that Kerry and their parents were getting flack too that was bothering Kokichi. 

...but he could be sympathetic that Dicean justice was something that made his partners deeply uncomfortable. It wasn’t personal. Nothing quiet about it. Dr. Mariah was right...saying it much more clearly than Kokichi ever managed to. And while he wanted to comfort his partners...it was against the sort of justice he believed in to suggest that...them going to speak to John personally, and causing him bodily harm would be the right thing to do. 

Because he didn’t believe that at all. It would privately ensure that John never talked to Shuuichi like that again, but...it wouldn’t inspire change. There would be nothing stopping him from speaking that way to others. The problem would be the retaliation, not the actions themselves. This way...this system said to the people, ‘take care of the community, every member of it, or you will not be a part of it.’

Kokichi kicked his legs a little, just gently letting them hang from where they dangled off the couch. ...even having that explained...that guilty feeling wasn’t lifting. It was still there.

Shuuichi, again, seemed to deflate at that… before muttering, “Well, it feels shitty.”

“...” Kaito opened his mouth, and then closed it, sighing. Frankly, as far as he was concerned, John could take a short trip down a long flights of stairs. He didn’t give a shit that John was ‘going through something’, because fuck him. He just wished he had been able to get his piece of him, before leaving him to his fellow Diceans, whatever they decided to do with him.

...but, again. Kaito wasn’t looking to spend the first part of Miya’s life out there in a garden somewhere. It was… frustrating. The idea that he couldn’t defend his loved ones himself from harassment. But his heart wasn’t exactly breaking for John, that he had faced public humiliation rather than just getting a few bones broken. 

Shuuichi too often felt too much sympathy for the people who hurt him. It endlessly frustrated Kaito, in the same way it had when he had thought Kokichi was doing that… hell, when Kokichi still did that.

None of it felt good…

Dr. Mariah looked between the three men, who were all sullenly withdrawing into themselves, and sighed, “Well, this went… well, it went, anyway. Unfortunately, Kaito, Shuuichi, your frustrations with how Dicea does justice is less a ‘relationship’ issue and more something to bring up with your personal therapists. And I’m afraid you’ll bring those up with them to simply find ways to cope in this new environment. Nothing will change for you. You are in a new place, and I’m afraid the only solution for your grievances with that place is to learn to live as the locals do. You can’t talk or argue your way out of our customs. You can only leave them or cope with them.”

“I don’t want to leave.” Kaito said quickly, as if he was afraid someone would come in and escort him out if he wasn’t immediately clear about that.

“... It doesn’t really matter how I feel about things anywhere I go. What’s the difference.” Shuuichi muttered, shrugging. “Here, Luminary. Same problem, different context… same solution. Just get over it.”

“Talk to your therapists about it.” Dr. Mariah insisted, giving Shuuichi a curious look at that, before saying, “Alright! I know that crisis doesn’t feel solved, and… that’s because it isn’t. But there’s greater communication issues that led to that becoming a bigger issue then it ever needed to be, and we have to work on those if we really want to solve this problem. So… did everyone do their homework?” Dr. Mariah asked, looking between the three of them.

Kokichi shrank at that. ‘Just deal with it’ never felt like the right solution to him...but he’d long since learned that to maintain a harmonious collective, you could not accept every point of view. Advocating hatred and genocide, spewing dealth cult rhetoric, dividing people in any way that could lead to an ‘us-versus-them’ mentality...though that last one was...very hard to dissuade. 

...part of him wanted to ask himself if there really was no way to listen more to his partners’ way of justice...but he knew he couldn’t. Because it went against every feeling he had about protecting Diceans. 

Sighing again, Kokichi added one more tick each to his indirect questions and mind reading before giving Dr. Mariah a nod. “Should we just...hold them out next to each other and compare any differences? And...I’m not sure I can remember the context behind each tally… Is that just something to work on later?”

“Context for all the tallies would be silly.” Dr. Mariah chastised, shaking her head, “Though, I may ask for examples you do remember, if I’m so inclined. It might enlighten if you all feel the same way about your bad habits, if you even can recognize them. That sort of thing. So~” Dr. Mariah leaned forward, “Let’s get up and put them on that hanging shelf by my filing cabinet. I try not to keep things like desks or heavy furniture, more than the couches, if I can help it. They’re too efficient as weapons in a stressful environment.”

“Oh, man, they really are.” Kaito reflected, thinking fondly back to the desk leg.

Putting all the papers down…

Shuuichi’s list had a handful of tallies for Kaito, maybe fourteen or fifteen, Dr. Mariah hadn’t counted yet, and had an easy to count five for Kokichi, and none for himself. 

Kaito had twice the amount Shuuichi had for him for himself and… Dr. Mariah chuckled. “...did you cross out tallies for Shuuichi and Kokichi?” she asked, looking at the absolute mess that was Kaito’s tallies for his partners. There was one or two clear tallies in both of them, but otherwise, the tallies under their names were fiercely blacked out, some so hard that it looked like Kaito had ripped holes into the paper itself.

“I, uh… changed my mind, on those ones.” Kaito said, giving his messy tally count paper a somewhat guilty look, “After stopping to think about it, ya know?”

Kokichi...winced a little at Kaito’s comment. He actually was having fewer nightmares these days, and the worst and most frequent were still about Itch, Tom, and Aba, but...sometimes the imagery of his smashed desk on the floor, Kaito’s empty, dejected look on his face...it was a very occasional image in his dreams. 

The difference between all their papers was...stark. At first, Kokichi only felt disappointed because it wouldn’t be accurate feedback to see how much they’d actually done all their habits, but...that huge difference was the data they were looking for. 

There were...about ten tallies for his indirect questions, more around eighteen for the mind reading, three counts of withholding information about himself for Shuuichi, and two counts for social class speech for Kaito. Kokichi didn’t think he’d been holding back on his partners...but he supposed it was hard to tell where missing information was, in Shuuichi’s case--and Kokichi had only counted situations where he and Kaito had been talking about something that they’d shared personal things with and Shuuichi hadn’t...which wasn’t necessarily him not chiming in, because it sincerely could be that he just had nothing to relate to--and...while some things were a little more obvious, like Kaito saying “commoners” or when he used to call people on the castle staff “servants” but...Kokichi wasn’t even really sure what he was looking out for some of the time. There could be nuances that just went over his head. 

“...this is...quite the data spread,” he softly hummed. 

Kaito looked at Shuuichi and Kokichi’s in concern. “...did I do mine wrong?”

“Why do you ask?” Dr. Mariah asked, having only glanced at the papers before moving her eyes to the three men in question, curious at their reactions to the sheets. 

“Well, I mean… mine doesn’t match theirs.”

“Well, we have to keep in mind that we’re in our own heads. I’m sure both of you were counting times you only made your tally worthy stuff in your heads.” Shuuichi mused, raising an eyebrow at all the tallies next to his own name.

“Were you not doing that for yourself?” Dr. Mariah asked him.

“I think we might have different ideas of ‘not offering an opinion’.” Shuuichi sighed, already heading off to go tottle back to his chair, Kaito giving the papers one more worried glance before hurrying off to help Shuuichi sit down. 

Collecting the papers for herself, Dr. Mariah also went to sit down, looking them over… “Open floor. Anyone have any observations they wish to make on the tallies before I start bringing up my own observations?”

Mm...well that was true. But if he hadn’t been thinking about monitoring it, then Kokichi would’ve spoken all those instances and...well, for the purposes of tracking behavior, it seemed prudent to count all those times too. It would account for some variation…

“...but not all of it,” Kokichi hummed, having told all of that, more or less, to the others as they settled back down on the couches and chair. “I’m...positive I’ve done mind read-y stuff that I actually said, more than just once or twice. Was...it just something that was only obvious to me?”

“I mean, I marked both your things a few times, Kokichi.” Shuuichi observed, looking down at his own paper, “Admittedly, most of my marks were done the next morning, after going through my dream loops. The mind reading stuff, though, happened way more often then the half-question stuff. But…” Shuuichi glanced between his marks of Kokichi and Kokich’s marks for Kokichi, and said, “Again, it was probably happening more in your head then anywhere else. Hell, maybe you were being more careful not to say it aloud because you were thinking about it? I just didn’t notice you doing it that often, maybe once or twice every other day… and honestly, mostly in bursts. You’d be fine all day, and then we’d get to some specific conversation or another, and suddenly you were doing both several times in a row, minutes from each other… so...”

Shuuichi shrugged, “Conclusion would suggest on the small sample evidence that some conversation topics make you more unwilling to talk directly to other people than others? That you do those things when you’re uncomfortable in general.”

“Not wanting to directly have difficult conversations is a normal, common coping technique, but… not particularly useful, with people you spend every day with.” Dr. Mariah noted, “Shuuichi, can you think of any specific examples you saw it occur with?”

“None that I‘d volunteer.” Shuuichi said simply.

“That sounds right…” And apparently was very common to boot. But Dr. Mariah was right. More often than not, at least where Kokichi could tell, making assumptions and talking around what he wanted only made things worse when it came to his partners. He needed to be able to be honest and upfront with them. 

Tugging at his hair, Kokichi furrowed his brow, trying to think of the specific conversations he’d actually talked around in. Examples would actually help him notice it and...maybe Dr. Mariah would be able to give him some tools to help ease himself into difficult conversations when he felt like clamming up. 

“Um...we had dinner last week with a friend of mine. He was...acting a little weird, and...I just sort of assumed his motives.” Kokichi’s eyes averted as he grasped the hem of his shirt. “I didn’t want to think badly of a friend, and I wanted the dinner to go well… It turned out alright, but...I think we could’ve gotten there a little faster if I’d just asked straight out what was up with him.”

“I see… were either of you present for this dinner?”

“No.” Shuuichi answered.

“Yeah, I was.” Kaito raised his hand.

“Mmhm. Kaito, is Kokichi’s reaction to the dinner one of your tallies?”

Kaito… hesitated. “Uh…” glancing over at his paper on his hand, he said, “...no?”

“No?” Dr. Mariah copied, raising an eyebrow.

“...it… might have been. At one point.” Kaito confessed, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Did you take the tally off?”

“Well… well, yeah.” Kaito said, giving a little, sheepish shrug.

“Why?”

“Because I did the same thing. I thought Temp was trying to steal a baby. I thought all sorts of stuff! I was freaked the fuck out, for a second there!”

“Does you doing it as well negate the fact that Kokichi did it?”

“Well… I can’t call it a mark against him if I’m doing it too.” Kaito said uneasily.

“Hm… Kokichi.” Dr. Mariah said, deciding to explore that more lately, “Why are you afraid of having conversations like these? Or… no…” Dr. Marah closed her eyes, tapping her chin, “...forget that. It might be relevant, but it’s not the most relevant thing. When you’re… mind reading? And trying to have conversations without actually asking a question… what’s the ideal outcome, for you? When you were talking to your friend, Temp? I think was the name you gave, Kaito? When you were in the middle of a difficult conversation with Temp, and you were assuming his motives, instead of just asking him, ideally, how does that scenario end for you?”

Kokichi looked over with a surprised look. Kaito thought Temp was...trying to steal a baby? How would that even… There was apparently even more from that night that they saw differently.

And while observing behavior had no need for concepts like hypocrisy--because there was no correlation between actions--Kokichi focused on the question Dr. Mariah gave him and...maybe they’d go back to that. One thing at a time. 

Sighing, Kokichi tugged at his hair more, trying to think through what...he had actually wanted from that conversation. “...I was hoping that, by not calling attention to how weird he was being, Temp would feel comfortable enough to tell us what was actually going on himself, without anyone needing to say anything…”

“...it’s a bit idyllic, I suppose. And he told me later that he was actually trying to ‘act natural’ to downplay his nerves so...it really wasn’t helpful at all to just let it be… I’m not a mind reader and neither is he. Assuming things just makes everything needlessly complicated.” Kokichi sighed, rubbing his temple a little. “...I know that. It’s just...hard to put into practice, sometimes.”

“So, the issue isn’t that you need to understand why you do it, but just need ways to practice not doing it.” Dr. Marah asked, looking curiously at Kokichi, “And the reason why you didn’t do it was to… allow Temp the chance to fix the situation himself.”

“So… your reasons for avoiding these conversation points are purely altruistic. Then?”

Kokichi’s brow furrowed, and after a moment, he shook his head. “No… There are some situations where it’s like that, but...there are some where...I’m hoping to get an answer to the question I actually want, but...I think asking it will make the person I’m talking to angry. So I ask around it, hoping that I’ll get enough information to piece it together myself without having to upset someone. And...I’m sure there are others where I don’t have much of a motive, and it’s just foot in mouth lack of consideration.” And likely, more often than not, it was some combination of them. A life of talking that way meshing with intention until it became something Kokichi had barely realized he was doing.

Dr. Mariah nodded. Better. 

“There’s still probably more to it than that,” She warned Kokichi, “And if we’re not honest with ourselves about why we avoid certain situations, we have no chance of fixing it. We can’t confront things we don’t realize we’re avoiding…”

Dr. Mariah paused, thinking…

“I’m certain all of you, at some point or another, have heard the phrase, or something like it, ‘Everyone is doing their best, all the time’. Right?”

Shuuichi and Kaito looked back at her… before Shuuichi gave Kaito a confused look, who said sheepishly, “Uh… I think… maybe I heard Kokichi say something like that once?”

“...Okay, well, for those of us who haven't heard it, there’s a thought process that, no matter who you’re talking too, what they’re doing, however badly they are failing… you can trust that they are trying their best. For Luminaries, um…” Dr. Mariah paused and thought about it. It had been a long, looong time since she had visited that area, “...how about… everyone is the hero in their own story?”

At that, both of them nodded. Of course. Everyone knew that.

“Right. Both of those things, generally, are true. But, people fail to think about why that’s true. And, generally speaking, again… the reason why is because we have difficult time facing the ugliest sides of ourselves. People make the same mistakes, or grave mistakes, or selfish mistakes, not because they wish to self-destruct, or destroy others, even, but because they simply, in that moment, cannot recognize that it is a mistake. They cannot recognize when they are acting on their own selfish tendencies, and thus do something selfish. They cannot recognize when they are being a coward, and thus act cowardly. People are trying their best, acting out the best versions of themselves, with the knowledge of themselves that they currently have available to them. So, if you repeat a bad, self-destructive behavior, over and over again? You can trust that in the moment, you’re making the best decision you can, as well as you can… but you should also be aware that you are probably ignoring some aspect of your own thinking that allowed you to make that mistake again anyway. Knowledge of the world around you is power. Knowledge of yourself is power. Every person should strive to understand ourselves, as much as any flawed person can.”

Shuuichi… looked incredibly unimpressed with this speech, and borderline annoyed with her, while Kaito was nodding along, an intense look on his face. Both clearly of different minds as to how helpful that mindset was.

“If you think you have yourself figured out, and still make the same mistakes? Then very likely, you’re still ignoring the actual cause.” She said, looking sternly at Kokichi, “You need to do some soul searching, about what it is you’re actually avoiding… but! Let’s give you some tools to think about what you’re doing more. That can help you look at it all more honestly.”

“So… Kokichi? I would like you to practice… actually, you might already. Does your current therapy have you journal your days?” Dr. Mariah asked.

Kokichi nodded slowly as Dr. Mariah spoke, finding...sense in her explanation. Everyone was doing their best, but...that was no reason to never grow. What your best might be could be something that would hurt a lot of people, on top of being toxic to yourself. Everyone was doing their best, but you should always strive to make that best better than the day before. 

And...the only way to be better was to know what to improve. And you could only see that by acknowledging your flaws. 

Kokichi wanted people to be better without prompting or influence, and he hated making people upset. So he ran his mouth in dumb ways. Right now, he was learning to catch that, and be clear, even if it was scary. In this sort of context, bravery was often rewarded, if not always in the way you’d expect. 

He...wasn’t sure besides that he was trying to avoid, but he supposed that’s what the soul-searching was for. Kokichi nodded, though he looked a little bashful. “Yeah, but...sometimes I have to re-cap days after the fact… I try to get it done after dinner, but...sometimes I’m so tired I go to bed early,” or he was...occupied in a way that would make him tired at that time, “Or that’s one of the days I do another work session and I get caught up in it… I have been trying to be more consistent with it, though. I’m just doing myself a disservice if I’m not.”

“True, but that’s your personal therapists problem.” Dr. Mariah smirked, giving Kokichi an amused look, “So I won’t harass you about that. However, what I would like you to do, is from now on, when you’re journaling? I want you to try and think of questions that you wished you had asked, specifically, Shuuichi and Kaito that day. Just write down the question. And beside that question? I want you to write something very simple.”

“The emotion you were feeling when the question came to you.” Dr. Mariah said, holding up one finger, “And who that emotion was towards.” She said, holding up the second.

“I don’t want a summary. I don’t want an in depth analysis. And while you don’t have to show me if you finish and realize it would make you uncomfortable, I do want you to write it with the idea that I will ask to take a glimpse at it, not to read the questions, but to see the list of emotions and who that emotion is directed at, whether yourself, one of them, or someone entirely outside of the group. Don’t deep dive. Just write the question, and the most obvious emotion you recall feeling about it. You will, inevitably, realize you felt more than one emotion about it. That’s fine. Just pick the first one that comes to mind. Can you give that a try for me?”

Questions he’d wished he’d asked… Kokichi knew that that sort of sentiment did come to him, not infrequently. And even writing them down he still might not want to ask them, but...well, he could write them down and...the strongest thing he’s feeling when he wants to. 

Chuckling softly, Kokichi gave their therapist a look. “You’re really pinning me with no analysis. But...I’ll try to keep it brief. Only the most prevalent emotion, and who it’s towards. No theories. Got it.”

Not even fifteen minutes in and he’d already gotten his homework assignment for the week. Go Kokichi! Get your shit sorted out!

Dr. Mariah nodded, before looking back to the papers, staring at them curiously… “All of you were fairly sparse with the others checks… except for you, Shuuichi. In fact, yours is so wildly different, I can’t help but wonder-”

“I didn’t make up my tallies,” Shuuichi sighed, looking annoyed, “I did the homework honestly.”

“And yet, Kaito’s count is twice what Kaito himself has put for his own, and your own is… zero.” She said, giving Shuuichi an unamused look, turning the paper over to confirm to him that he kept his own tallies blank, “Really?”

“I put a few for Kokichi as well.” Shuuichi said, a tad softly, not looking over at Kaito, who in turn was also now frowning, looking at his own tally, “Not that much less than what he put for himself.”

“Kokichi does his tallies small. He put plenty more for himself, than you did him. Which, is normal. Most of the time when people do this exercise, they tally their own marks the most out of everyone, for the same reason you all mentioned before: they count the times that only happen in their own heads. The unobvious things.” Dr. Mariah said, looking back down at the tallies, “Scratching out most of the tallies he made for you two is it’s own issue, but Kaito’s final count is typical for a healthy couple: most tallies against himself, a few for his partners. Same with Kokichi’s. Yours… indicates a bigger issue.”

“... look, I made an extra effort, since the last session, to not do my ‘issue’. I tried to add some personal opinion to every conversation, no matter how small. I was curious to see if Kokichi and Kaito would still have tallies against me, if I was actively trying not to do it.”

“What do you think the reason is they have tallies, then, if you ‘weren’t doing it’?” She asked, giving Shuuichi a carefully blank look.

“...I know you’re trying to suggest I don’t realize when I’m doing it, then, but I really think I share more than you give me credit fo-”

“Why are you so angry at Kaito?” She asked, interrupting him.

Shuuichi’s eyes narrowed, while Kaito’s eyes widened, looking to their pregnant partner in alarm. “...Shuuichi?” Kaito asked, “Are you angry at me?”

Honestly, Kokichi wasn’t overly surprised to see that Shuuichi hadn’t put any tallies in his own column. Considering the tricky issue of his habit to track being missing information...well, technically all information was missing until you said it. And...other than Kokichi and Kaito’s conversation during their night walk, where Shuuichi hadn’t even been there...they hadn’t exactly had any deep, difficult conversations that week. 

Kokichi felt...a little weird about that being Shuuichi’s thing to track too. When for so long Shuuichi was forced to give up information...he could understand why his partner might not be so keen to share. But...the same as not wanting to have difficult conversations, it was difficult when you were in a relationship. 

...especially if the thing you weren’t saying was about an issue you had with one of the people you were in a relationship with. 

Kokichi looked over in slight worry, but...his eyes squinted for a moment. A...a weird twinge going through his head...but it wasn’t painful. (...he doesn’t see Kaito and Maki as invincible anymore.) For a moment, Kokichi was just...baffled with his own thoughts, but...even if he had a mind to, saying something like that was...mega mind reading so…

He sighed, trying to give Shuuichi a slightly more placating look, so he wouldn’t feel the need to fight Dr. Mariah. “...I mean...you do tease Kai-chan a lot. I never took that as anger, more just...all of us messing around. But if you do have a problem with us, together or separately...then it’s something we need to talk about, Shuu-chan. And if it’s all off base, then we need to know that too.”

Shuuichi’s angry, intense look softened as he looked away from Dr. Mariah’s fascinated, almost mocking expression-- at least, that’s how it seemed to Shuuichi, anyway-- when he looked over to Kokichi, avoiding Kaito’s hurt expression as his eyes passed the room. “I… I don’t have a… problem, problem, I just… no, I don’t.” Shuuichi said, looking back at Dr. Mariah, avoiding Kaito’s gaze again, “You’re off base. I love Kaito.”

“I believe you.” Dr. Mariah said.

“...” An uncomfortable beat of silence, “... then why did you say-”

“Being angry at someone has very little to do with love. Being outraged, furious with someone, has very little to do with if you love them. You can even hate someone, and love them. Love is an entirely separate thing from those emotions. One can affect the other, certainly, and often does. But it doesn’t have to, and just as often, doesn’t. That’s why just because someone loves you, doesn’t mean they’re never a danger to you, or capable of causing you just… unbearable suffering. Love is…” Dr. Mariah sighed, “...not inherently a protector, or a protective instinct.”

“So, even if you love him… he’s not automatically safe from your ire.” Dr. Mariah told Shuuichi, who finally had the courage to glance at Kaito, who was… well, he actually looked a little mentally checked out. Distracted, thinking of something else as he stared at the floor, a hard, confused look on his face. “And if you were counting on that, you’re going to end up hurting him without meaning to.”

“...I’m not angry at Katio, and I…” Shuuichi glanced briefly away, “...haven't hurt him. You’re assuming a lot of things based on a tally sheet. Myself and Kaito’s relationship is fi-”

“When Kokichi and I got married, Shuuichi left me a note, telling me that he was going to go rescue Maki from her mission.” Kaito suddenly said, looking back at Dr. Mariah, “He left the note with the entirely reasonable idea that I’d come after him to help… because Maki was dangerous, right then. More dangerous than we even knew at the time, to Shuuichi, but dangerous regardless. And if I wanted to catch up to them, I needed to leave right away. As soon as the wedding was done.”

Shuuichi lowered the brim of his hat as Kaito shrugged, saying, a sort of… bitter nonchalance to his tone, “I didn’t go after him. I stayed and… went to the after-party of the wedding. I… I have no good reasons. I just didn’t go.”

...love didn’t nullify any actions or feelings. It was just...another facet of depth to them. Nazumi had loved the girl in her hometown...and had killed people for her. Kaito loved him...and still raped him. He and Kaito love each other, and had still tried to kill themselves. 

...Kaito loved Shuuichi and Maki, but he didn’t go after them once the treaty was signed. 

Kokichi looked down and away, hugging himself around his middle. This...certainly wasn’t going to make that guilty feeling go away. Even if all three of his friends had told him it wasn’t his fault that Kaito had stayed for the party...there was still a part of him, even now, that blamed himself. It was mean, and really undermined Kaito’s independence, but...he still did. 

...he bet if he’d just wanted to go to bed, or even sit at the side of the party, Kaito would’ve gone.

Dr. Mariah sighed, suddenly stretching her arms over her head, as she said, “I see, I see… I wanted to hold off on this for awhile. Until we really got into the meat of your surface problems. But she keeps coming up, so… before we go any further? I need you three to tell me about the apparent fourth person in this relationship.”

Lowering her arms, leaning back, the doctor asked, “Who is Maki?”

Kaito’s eyes widened, glancing at Kokichi and Shuuichi uncertainly, before saying, “Well, she’s… I think I’ve said this already, haven't I? She’s our childhood friend, or, mine and Shuuichi’s. She, like Shuuichi, came to Dicea as an escort to me, basically to ensure my protection, that I was treated well, at least for the first year. She’s the one with all the younger siblings who are moving here soon, are well on their way, and is the mother of Timothy, my adopted son. And, she’s… I mean, she’s not a fourth person in this… this relationship-”

“Maybe not sexually, which is what I’m assuming… actually, don’t let me assume. All of you, individually. Who is this Maki girl to you? She’s in almost every single story you all bring up. Kaito? Since you were almost done with your explanation?”

“Well, she’s my best friend, and… the mother of my child… and, well, I mean, we did date for… for a little while back in high school.” Kaito admitted, shrugging, “But we got into too many fights. It just didn’t work out. We’re still extremely close though.”

“I see.” Dr. Mariah nodded, “Kokichi?”

Kokichi’s eyes widened, not...having expected that sort of comment to...ever happen? Sure, he cared about Maki a lot, and she was a big part of their lives, but…

Kokichi blinked at Dr. Mariah, still a little reeling. “She’s my friend. Sister-in-law, in a way...she accepted the relation, anyway, once we announced Shuu-chan’s pregnancy and that we were in a relationship with him. She…”

He paused, looking a little fond, and a little ashamed of himself. “...she’s never underestimated me. Even if we do misunderstand each other, time to time. Maki-chan is someone I place a lot of faith and trust in.”

“Mhm, mhm… sister in law?” Dr. Mariah asked, looking to Shuuichi, who sighed.

“...in a sense.” Shuuichi agreed, nodding, “Maki takes that stuff more seriously than I ever did, but… we’re both technically from the same orphanage, though we have no memories of being there together. I was in and out for a year before she got there. We may have overlapped for a few weeks, but again, no memories of it. But, like we’ve said… Maki’s always been one hundred percent into the orphanage sibling thing. I’m pretty sure… actually, nevermind. Let’s just say she had more reason than most to think that way.” Shuuichi said, thinking of her conditioning. “So, culturally? Maki and I are siblings. Though, that’s not why we’re close. We just… well, at first we got dragged around by Kaito together. But, after that, we found we had a lot in common. Just got really close over the years.” Shuuichi said…

Before adding in, “She’s also another indentured. A royal assassin. We weren’t trained together, but we were raised in the castle together. The castle’s huge, and our mentors weren’t originally roomed anywhere near each other, so that doesn’t mean we were destined to be close because of that either, but once we were actually introduced and given a reason to spend time together, living so close to each other made it a lot easier.” Shuuichi frowned, before saying, “I… I’ll confess, if she hadn’t so concretely seen me as a brother? And if I was more romantically inclined more than a year ago? I could have seen myself and Maki together. But, with both of those things not being true? And her not around to weigh in on the matter, along with the feelings of my partners taken into account? I’d feel uncomfortable calling Maki a ‘fourth’ person in this relationship… though she is someone who impacts it quite a lot.”

“Fine.” Dr. Mariah said, “Even with that said, is she around herself? She might be useful in some future conversations, considering how often her name is brought up. As an ‘impactful’ friend.”

“She’s… not.” Kaito said, an uncomfortable look on his face as he said, “She’s… on vacation.”

“What an ominous and grave way to say something so incredibly normal.” Dr. Mariah noted, raising an eyebrow at Kaito.

Impactful for sure, but...Kokichi had never been attracted to Maki in a romantic sense. He loved her as a friend, sure, but...it was different from the way he loved Kaito and Shuuichi. 

...but she probably would’ve had some insightful things to say, if she wouldn’t be even more distrustful and suspicious of Dr. Mariah than Shuuichi was. 

Honesty was important in therapy, but...this was a safety concern. 

Sighing, Kokichi chimed in from there. “She went to Luminary to oversee the student exchange and make sure her siblings were gonna make it over the border alright. But...she said that once she made sure of that, she was gonna take some vacation time. Maki-chan’s...she’s had a job since she was a kid, and while it let her travel, it’s really not the same as sightseeing, or making her own pace. So...with the freedom to do it now, and time sensitive responsibilities taken care of...she’s on vacation.”

Kokichi took a little breath, and while he had a small smile on his face and his voice was hopeful...he didn’t look at his partners. “We could ask her if she’d mind coming by to one of these sessions when she comes back, though. I think she’d really enjoy getting to tear into the three of us at once.”

Kaito chuckled at that, glad Kokichi had taken care of that. It still… hurt… to think about where Maki was. Scared the shit out of him. He had a hard time even thinking about it, let alone talking about it, even if all he was talking about was a… was a…

(Lie.)

(... Maki, please… don’t…)

Dr. Mariah felt the fear radiating off of Kaito-- it tasted good. Sort of like liquified electricity. Had real ‘oomph’, like a good cup of coffee-- and just nodded at Kokichi, “Ah, I see. Well, we’ll re-discuss the idea of her joining us for a few sessions when she returns, then. Until then, thank you, I believe I have better context for our mysterious ‘Maki’. Now… Shuuichi? This incident is Kaito’s best guess for why you might possibly be upset with him… is it?”

There was silence for awhile. Shuuichi just looking tight and uncomfortable… before he said, “I don’t want to be upset with Kaito. We’ve talked about all the things he’s… done before. It feels unfair, to bring it all up again.”

“If it’s still causing you to lash out, then more conversation needs to happen. Not everything gets cleared up with one good conversation. Sometimes it takes having the same conversation, over and over, before what the conversation was about really sinks in. Sometimes you need to have the same conversation over and over again as a sort of… tune up. A sort of relationship maintenance. For the same exact reason we don’t tell our loved ones ‘I love you’ only once in our lives.” Dr. Mariah smiled lightly, “Time degrades words. Sometimes we need to hear it again.”

“...it’s still not fair.” Shuuichi murmured, “I don’t want to spend the rest of my life punishing him for things he’s already paid for.”

“Then talking to him about it is the first step towards not doing that.” Dr. Mariah insisted.

“... it’s okay, Shuuichi.” Kaito piped in, giving Shuuichi a small, sad grin, “Look, man… I get it. I’ve been fucking up a… a lot. If there’s something you need to get off your chest? Something I need to apologize for again. Fuck, let’s do it. I can handle it.”

“... I’ve been… I’ve been counting on you, Kaito.” Shuuichi said, voice suddenly tight. Staring at Kaito from his lowered brim, “...I followed you through enemy lines… and yet… you’ve let me down so much… I was loyal. Why weren’t you there for me when I needed you!?”

Shuuichi grit his teeth, lowering his brim as he said, “...it felt like… it felt like I just couldn’t… compete… your indentured versus your…” Shuuichi glanced at Kokichi, before he grunted, lowering his cap further, not looking at either of them as he said softly, “... I needed you and you let me down… and that hurt so much...”

...hm. Talking...wasn’t punishing. Continuing to harbor resentment was, and...talking about it, even if you’re saying the same thing...was a way to move past that. For everyone. 

Kokichi only considered that point for a moment before Shuuichi spoke and...that tightness in his boyfriend’s throat created a lump in Kokichi’s. His gaze softened in sympathy, even if Shuuichi wasn’t looking up and…

Kokichi’s shoulders lowered, though they hunched in, and it was only that he didn’t want to put his shoes on Dr. Mariah’s couch that kept him from hugging his legs. Maki had...told him something similar. About the hurt and frustration she had with Kaito over him not coming after them. About feeling lesser. Like she wasn’t important to Kaito...like she was being abandoned. 

...he knew his guilt helped no one. But he still felt it. 

And...what was almost worse was...what was there left to say? There wasn’t a good reason Kaito had stayed, except for panicked, perceived obedience. There was no taking it back… And Kaito was trying every day to be better than he was. Maybe...Shuuichi just needed to hear an acknowledgement of his hurt, but...an apology from Kokichi had never gone over well for this issue. So...for once, he kept his mouth shut, just...feeling adrift in the waves of Shuuichi’s anger and pain.

Kaito was also a little lost, on what to do. He had already offered Shuuichi a piece of his flesh in payment, and Shuuichi had been tempted, but ultimately refused. He had sworn himself to Shuchi in several different ways now. He already planned to never let himself make a mistake this huge with Shuuichi again, but… well, the odds of this situation, or anything like it, happening again was small. Not a lot of opportunities to prove himself.

What could he… do? To ease Shuuichi’s feelings. To make it up to him… he supposed he could just… apologize again. And he would. But it felt like so little…

“...you know that you’ve never, never, just been my indentured to me, right?” Kaito asked, looking to Shuuichi, “I mean… do you… know that?”

Dr. Mariah smirked slightly. Oooooh… they had finally gotten back to this.

Shuuichi just shrugged miserably, “Yeah, of course, I know-”

“Did I make you doubt it?” Kaito asked, gripping his hands together, interlocking his fingers, as he gave Shuuichi an ashamed, earnest look, “Even if it was only for a little bit… or, a few times. Since we’ve been here? Did I make you feel like I just saw you as my indentured? And that’s why you couldn’t compete?”

“... Maybe.” Shuuichi whispered, face tightening up, “Maybe?”

“I’m sorry.” Kaito said, gripping his hands tighter, “I’m sorry, I… you’re not crazy. Neither you or Maki are crazy. I think maybe that’s why… this has been so hard for you both to let go of. Why I haven't felt good about it either. Because I won’t just… admit that…” Kaito grit his teeth… before he let out a sigh. “... m-my… this is no ones but mines fault-” Kaito said, giving Kokichi a hard look, before his expression softened, turning back to Shuuichi, “...but, bud, my brains all fucked up, man. I… I didn’t chase after you guys because you… you weren’t…” Kaito’s brow furrowed, and his eyes went red around the rims, before he closed them, a few angry tears escaping, “... you weren’t as important. As my new husband. I… I felt like I had a… responsibility to stay with him. Because I was his. And… and so I did. I did. I didn’t go. Even though I knew you both needed me… c-cause h-hierarchy and…”

Kaito made a small, wet sound, his throat choking on himself. He had to give it a second to clear, letting a little, needy huff of breath, before he looked up at Shuuichi with watery eyes, “Your angers not misplaced. I made an… inexcusable decision based on hierarchy. You deserved better than that. More from me. I’m so sorry, Shuuichi. You’re not wrong. That’s what happened.”

Shuuichi stared back at Kaito… before he let out a breath. His shoulders sagging a little, like he had let out a breath he had been holding the whole time. “...see? I knew that was what happened… that was really shitty, Kaito.”

Kaito’s eyes were still swimming, but he let out a little barking, uncertain laugh, as he said through his warbling voice, “Fuck, dude, I know. I hate that I did that shit. I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry.”

“... it’s alright.” Shuuichi murmured, before shaking his head, “I mean, it’s not. Obviously it’s not. But… I do feel better that you’ve just admitted it. I’ve felt like an asshole for months, thinking that was what happened and just… arguing with myself over it. If that’s what had actually happened or not…”

“It was.” Kaito said softly, “I’m so sorry.”

Shuuichi nodded.

Kokichi knew what that look to him meant, respected it, but… He couldn’t help the way his features tightened and his eyes started to swim. ...he...he couldn’t ignore that that was how Kaito had thought of it but...fuck! It felt awful to hear someone he loved say that they belonged to him! That that sort of mindset was so strong that Kaito had deeply hurt the people he loved most at the time just because of...a hierarchical devotion?

His stomach felt rancid, but...he knew it wasn’t his pain to feel. 

Even if maybe there were things he could’ve kept an eye out for...Kokichi hadn’t known about conditioning or hierarchy at that time, and he’d barely known the Luminary trio. He hadn’t even known even the lie of Maki’s mission until it had been too late. Shuuichi and Maki had thanked him for sending Katsuki, and for his own actions, that really was the smartest thing he could’ve done. 

It wasn’t his fault. Not from his actions or existence. Blaming himself would just be taking away from his family’s pain, things that they felt and needed to express. 

...but it still felt horrible. And Kokichi could at least placate himself that...well, anyone would feel bad if their loved ones were hurting. At the very least, his sympathy was alright.

“...I’m sorry, Shuu-chan… And I’m not apologizing for myself,” he gently huffed, cutting that off at the pass. “But...it sucks. So I’m sorry.”

“I know… it does suck. And… I don’t know. Again, there really was something relieving to just knowing that I wasn’t… making that up, in my head. That me and Maki weren’t crazy to think… have you had this conversation with Maki, yet?” Shuuichi asked Kaito.

Kaito frowned… and then lit up. “Yes! Sort of! Do you want to hear about it?”

Shuuichi looked startled at Kaito’s earnest look, before nodding hesitantly, “Sure?”

“Okay! Uh… sorry, this is one of those things I’m gonna be a bad communicator about.” Kaito apologized, giving Kokichi an equally earnest, apologetic, before standing up, rushing over to Shuuichi and leaning in, covering his ear and starting to whisper.

As Dr. Mariah watched the two of them with some amusement, Kaito whispering, “...and then she… with your...couldn’t…” and Shuuichi eyes increasingly widened at every word, nodding every now and again to confirm he had heard something or another… she looked over to Kokichi and smirked a little.

“Yes, I’m entirely off-base to suggest this fourth person isn’t a part of this relationship. Though, you might want to tell those two, that.” she suggested, gesturing to the two taller Luminaries, Shuuichi pausing as he seemed to consider what Kaito had told him… before laughing lightly.

“Oh no, Kaito… really?”

Kaito grinned, nodding, “Yeah. It sucked.”

“That’s… wow. I mean, still, have the new conversation with her too, but wow… I wish I could have seen it.”

“Yeah, I thought you might get a kick out of it. She seemed like she got it all out of her system, but… yeah. I’ll still talk to her about it again when she gets back, I promise… though, if she asks me to spar about it? I am begging you to save me.”

“Mmmm… just don’t piss me off around the same time and I’ll consider it.” Shuuichi smiled, leaning into the kiss as Kaito tilted his chin up for one, two chaste pecks before Shuuichi glanced at Dr. Mariah and said, “Kaito.”

“Right, right, sorry, one for the road, okay done.” Kaito said, stealing one more kiss, before going to sit back down on the couch… before scooting over closer to Kokichi. Taking his hand and holding it, leaning in to kiss the side of Kokichi’s head, before whispering, “You okay?”

“I was going to get into that next, actually.” Dr. Mariah said, putting the tips of her fingers again, “Luminary relationship hierarchy… I think it’s safe to say in this relationship, it matters enough that we should discuss it. Kokich, as my fellow Dicean, how much do you actually understand about how relationships work in Luminary?”

Kokichi sighed softly as he watched Kaito whisper to Shuuichi. As relieving as it was to know that Kaito had had this conversation with Maki, he...had a pretty good guess as to why Kaito wasn’t telling the story aloud, and screw mind reading, he was sure he was right. And while he wished he could know everything about his family...there were always going to be parts he couldn’t handle. Things that worked for them that sparked horror in him. And...even if he didn’t approve...he didn’t want to take away that coping method. So...he could remain in ignorance. 

He gave Dr. Mariah a flat look, though, at her comment. Yes, Maki was important to them. Yes, she did impact their relationship. No, he didn’t have even the inkling of any romantic feelings for her. The relationship between the four of them was different from the one he had with Shuuichi and Kaito, and while the quartet relationship would likely benefit a lot from counseling…it was impossible to do while Maki was out of the country. 

And they couldn’t even ask her what she thought about her relationship with all of them either. So declaring anything was just...unfair. 

Kokichi looked on, a little relieved despite the whispers, honestly, as Kaito and Shuuichi seemed to have more of an ease with each other, and not just from the kisses. It...really was a conversation they needed to have. 

As was probably more about hierarchy. 

Kokichi nodded with a bit of a shrug, taking a breath for what was likely to be another difficult conversation. “We’ve talked about it a few times, probably saying some of the same stuff, but me not really understanding it… In Luminous relationships...there’s a power dynamic, with the person with...the most money or...social standing? In the more advantageous spot. And, in a marriage, that means that...they make all the important decisions for the people in the relationship, and the others defer to them.”

Glancing over at his partners, Kokichi tilted his head. “...that’s right? I got it?”

Both Shuuichi and Kaito nodded, but it was Shuuichi who clarefied, “It’s, technically, a form of social standing, though how much money you make influences certain levels of social standing. There’s a lot of little nuances to all of it, who your parents were, how you’re making your money, and after a certain point, nobility technically trumps wealth. It’s usually pretty clear before you start dating, who’s higher in the hierarchy between your potential relationship, but if it’s too close to tell, or something unusual, like a handover of power, is happening, it’s basically confirmed through the marriage and its corresponding documents. Whoever’s last name is kept after the marriage is the acknowledged hierarchical leader of the family.”

Kaito nodded, and added, “Our case would, in theory, be more vague, because neither of us took the others name… but-”

“I hate to interrupt, but I was doing some research for the benefits of these sessions, and I’m curious if I have it right, but anyone in the nobile line, up to the highest ranking royal member and the lowest ranking mistress, all have titles attached to them that puts them automatically into a hierarchical lineup. Which is why to you, Kaito, where you stand in this relationship seems more obvious, regardless of the naming scheme? Is that right?”

Kaito nodded again, “Um… yes.”

Dr. Mariah smiled, “Good, the literature I bought holds up to scrutiny. Thank you for indulging me.” Leaning back into her leather chair, she said, “So… Kaito? How does the hierarchy, according to Luminary, in this family work?”

“Kokichi, Miyako, myself, then Shuuichi.” Kaito said immediately, without so much as having to hesitate to think about it.

...it mattered how you made your money too? Nobility still kind of confused Kokichi but, if profession in general was made into a strata? Then...who came up with what jobs were more...whatever they were looking for than others? (And why did they change? Detectives weren’t always indentured jobs…)

Despite trying to understand--and ignoring that...weird thought again--Kokichi rubbed his temple a bit, looking confused. So...that was probably why Luminaries were so prickly about titles… He...knew that it really wasn’t a case of someone leading because they were suited for it. That ability barely factored into it at all, only where someone might give up their claim, but even then, it wasn’t always about ability, and more just...political games.

So confusing… And Kaito’s breakdown of the Luminous hierarchy of their family didn’t help at all. 

Kokichi looked over, just blinking for a moment. Looking utterly baffled. “...our unborn daughter is “higher”? She...she can’t even make decisions yet.”

“Yeah, that’s true… and, if you-” Kaito suddenly hesitated, not even really liking bringing this up as a pure hypothetical, though he continued, “If you weren’t around to lead her, myself or Shuuichi or an appointed advisor could make decisions on her behalf until she was the age of thirteen, where then her decisions had the potential to override ours… though it’d be sort of understood that her advisors were still the go-to people for final decisions on things until, well, she basically was ready to put a stop to that herself...”

“She’s a Momota Princess.” Shuuichi explained, a tired look in his eyes. “Until she can give up her claim? She’s one of the most important people in Luminary. Period.”

“Yes she is, yesh she is… my wittle princess… direct descendant of the king, so she’s technically the second in line to the throne right now, yesh she is.” Kaito cooed, looking adoringly at Shuuichi’s belly… though he laughed a little sheepishly, explaining, “Though, if something happened to Byakuya right now, and his son? More likely than not it’d be a competition between Queen Marigold and Princess Kaede, who would actually get the throne. Technically Queen Marigold is higher ranked, but Princess Kaede would have way more support from the temples… one of them would probably be forced to officially give up their claim, to settle the dispute.”

“Forgive me, but… do you not have a claim?” Dr. Mariah asked, looking quizzically at Kaito, “Are you not a prince?”

“I am, but… it’s really… I get to keep the title ‘prince’ out of respect for my family, since I wasn’t ‘disowned’ or anything like that. But any respect I receive is really more about my family's authority, not my own. Being unclaimed royalty sort of puts you in a weird… limbo place in the hierarchy. Where it’s more about who you’re attached to than you, ya know? If I was disowned, I’d basically be a commoner, without either the title or the claim.” Kaito shrugged. “Or, at least that was before I married Kokichi. I’d still have a title because I was attached to him now, if my family disowned me. Still claimed.”

“Right… Kaito, do you still consider these hierarchies important? You know by now that they hold no weight in Dicea.”

“...I know.” Kaito shrugged. “I… I’m really trying my best with that.”

...why on earth would anyone let a child be responsible for making family decisions, let alone ones for a country? Other than just being a bad idea for the people under their jurisdiction, because children were horrible at making weighty, long-term decisions, that was...so much pressure to put on a child! The kind of responsibility you shouldn’t give because it hurt. 

Again, and in a new way, Kokichi was thankful that they weren’t raising their daughter in Luminary. 

...but Kaito had been. And while he wasn’t given that sort of horrible responsibility...there were other ways that whole system could hurt. 

Kokichi tried not to look too agonized, but there was still something...pained in his expression as he looked over Kaito’s way. Just that feeling of...no one listening to Kaito because of a bunch of bullshit. Of just how...robbed of stability his husband had been. How he phrased that…’claimed.’ Like it wasn’t enough to be his own person. 

Letting out a breath, Kokichi rubbed his face a little but gave Kaito a softer look. “The systems are...radically different. From the start, I’ve always appreciated your effort, even if each bit I’ve understood has been slow going… And...I dunno if it’s a comfort in that context, but...I’ve always seen you as an equal.” Kokichi gave a nod to Shuuichi then too. “Both of you.”

Shuuichi nodded back, a soft, content look at that. He already knew Kokichi felt like that, and while it was always nice to hear, his own certainty in that feeling meant hearing it didn’t punch the way it could. Shuuichi could understand things were different in Dicea, and could understand Kokichi just… didn’t see him as an Indentured. Or, even just as someone lower than himself.

Kaito… looked briefly confused, but not in a way that conveyed he didn’t necessarily understand, more in just… something about what Kokichi was conveying to him didn’t mesh with his fundamental understanding of the world. Kaito swallowed and looked down, looking a little ashamed of his own confusion, when Shuuichi seemed calm and assured…

Dr. Mariah smiled, “You’re all fascinating, really.” And extremely nourishing, “But I feel like I have to remind you that we’re working on your ability to communicate with each other. Kaito, if you don’t understand something Kokichi said, he’s not going to be able to accurately read your mind and clarify himself. And holding back asking him for clarity is only going to hurt all of you in the long run, if you’re ever in a position where you have to act on those understandings.”

Tilting her head a little at him, her red eyes calm and curious, Dr. Mariah said, “You’re both really so very much alike… There’s some fear in you that keeps you from asking for clarity on things. It’s really just as important for you, Kaito, as it is for your husband, to figure out what’s keeping you from just being honest with him about your own ignorance or contradictory viewpoints… but I’m not sure if that particular communication flaw is your most crippling hurdle right now, so you don’t get the same homework yet. I’m still not sure which homework I’ll give you… forgive me, I’m talking aloud.” 

Dr. Mariah sighed, as she continued, “I apologize, I indulged in a little bit of mindreading myself, and sent myself off on a tangent. These communication issues never entirely go away, even if you’re aware of them. Being aware of them just means it’s easier to identify them after you’ve committed them, and have tools available to you to fix it after it’s done. So... you seemed confused about what Kokichi just said, Kaito. Are you?”

Kaito frowned at all of this… but nodded, as he confessed, “I don’t know if I’m really confused about what Kokichi said… I understand what he said. And, I appreciate it, babe-” Kaito assured him, giving his husband what he hoped was a small, reassuring grin, “-but… I guess maybe it makes me confused as to how I think about things. I don’t… I didn’t feel unequal. Hierarchy and equality aren’t… the same thing.” Kaito said, though he sounded uncertain even as he said it, looking confused again, “Hierarchy is just… social rules. So everyone knows their place, and there’s no confusion to everything getting done. But that doesn’t mean… or, well… I mean, sure, some of the things mom and the… the other elites could say sort of sounded… but that was just them being kind of difficult. Commoners, indenturdes, foreigners… hell, even criminals, like… they’re all still people… it’s just social rules, it’s not… them… just because I’m lower than Kokichi doesn’t actually mean I’m unequal...I just follow different rules...”

Kaito frowned again, looking uncomfortable, as he struggled to explain two entirely different things. The world as he had been taught, and the world as he understood it. He knew from his teachings that Indentured’s were at the second lowest of the hierarchy and were to be treated as different from nobility… but he also knew that Indentured’s were people just as intelligent and capable and worthy of respect as nobility. That there wasn’t any real difference between Maki and Bailsong…

Shuuichi watched, his expression soft, as Kaito struggled to get his head around something himself and Maki had realized much, much earlier in their lives. That both of those thought processes, when held up to scrutiny, couldn’t work at the same time.

It was that sort of confusion that had given Kokichi so much trouble at the beginning. It was almost funny, almost a parallel to how he had misled Kaito about how the others in the castle treated him--until Shuuichi had clarified it, and further conversations with him and Maki about what Luminary was like, even colored in their very unique perspectives, Kokichi had struggled with the very thing Kaito was struggling with now. 

Almost like an impulse, Kokichi wanted to ask that, if you followed different rules, then didn’t that make your experiences unequal? But...that was talking around a problem. And while he didn’t want to say outright what it was, there was a more direct question Kokichi could ask that actually did get at the heart of at least one thing he wanted. 

“I don’t mean to say I know what you should work on for ‘homework’,” Kokichi slowly started, giving a slight nod to Dr. Mariah before giving Kaito a kind look. “But...I’m just saying, so you don’t have to rush to say everything now? But maybe you could write down, or explain to me the rules you want to follow because of hierarchy and...we can see what does and doesn’t work for the reality of our family? That way, we’re all on the same page.”

Dr. Mariah gave this a considering look, while Kaito looked a little startled at the idea. “Write them all down…?”

“I like that.” She decided, nodding, looking over to Kaito as she went on further, “But...because this is a suggestion from Kokchi, I want this to be more of a request from him, rather than a therapy assignment. You don’t have to do it, I’ll put no pressure or expectation on it. If you decide you don’t want to, you can consider this week a free week. Do you feel comfortable with that?”

Kaito hesitated for a moment, before nodding. He… supposed he did… how hard could it be? “Okay.” he said, nodding more firmly, “Sure, I’ll… I’ll write it all down.”

“That sounds like it’ll be difficult.” Shuuichi said dryly, “If you’d like, Kaito, I’ll give you a hand.”

Kaito nodded again, a little relief in it this time. “Yeah! It’ll be… it’ll be interesting! Really, ya know, looking at the small rules of our society! Doesn’t sound… intimidating at all!”

“What an apt way of expressing an entirely contradicting feeling.” Dr. Mariah laughed lightly, before tapping her chin slightly, “Let’s see… the two K’s both have their homework assignment and suggested task of the week… I feel like Shuuichi should be next, but honestly, it feels a little cruel to keep poking at you. Confessing to Kaito you have some lingering resentment towards him for treating you at your station during a crisis is… honestly, a very difficult thing to do. I’m quite pleased with you, Shuuichi.” Dr. Mariah praised lightly, smirking a little as she saw his annoyed glance. “Though that apparently doesn’t please you, in turn.”

“...the way you say things sometimes frustrates me.” Shuuichi confessed… though, the real truth was that she just… reminded him of her sometimes… so fucking smug and self assured. Like there isn’t a doubt in her mind… so convinced of her own capabilities, when it came to reading and manipulating other people… it made his skin crawl.

Dr. Mariah could taste his discomfort, and while it tasted pretty good, she had a feeling poking at this wouldn’t be particularly helpful in his relationship. And while she fed on all negative emotions, her trade with herself was to only encourage feeding on problems she was asked to help with. So, gently, she said, “I’m sorry about that, genuinely. My personality can be a little prickly and sometimes I forget myself and push things too far, to the point where my words and mannerisms cause others pain or discomfort. Sometimes I don’t notice when I’m doing it, and you can always tell me when I am, Shuuichi. I will always heed it. I apologize again.”

His taste-- a lovely, dark, bitterly miserable chocolate-... faded away a bit, and while Dr. Mariah already missed it, she could tell she had at least put him at ease a bit as he said, his energy more tasteless to her now, “Thank you. I’ll keep it in mind.”

“Mmmhm… for the last half of this session, let’s stop picking on you as individuals, and talk about something a little more group neutral.” Dr. Mariah decided, taking her small journal out of her pocket and looking at it, “Little Princess Miyako is coming up soon. Have you all been preparing? How are we feeling?”

It wasn’t that Kokichi wanted a list of ideas that he could just shoot down one after another--like their conversation about what sort of things they wanted to teach Miya, Kokichi was actually pretty excited that she and her dad could share Atua together, and that when she was a little older she could share weaponry too--but… It was like he’d said at an older session. As much as he wanted to find compromise...hierarchy wasn’t something you could compromise with. Either there was a power dynamic, or there wasn’t. And when it came to their relationship and how they went about their lives together...Kokichi wanted to go through it as partners. Not as...someone having all the decision power and people who’d come to fear or resent it. 

Kokichi gave Shuuichi a soft look, still feeling a little sympathetic to that hurt...but he perked up at the conversation change, brightening considerably. “The nursery is almost done! We finished painting the walls and the rug we ordered came in...it’s so soft and plush! And while Miya and Bonus are gonna stay in our room for a while, while we’re gonna need to check on them every few hours or so through the night, we got all the rest of the furniture for the nursery in as well. I just need to finish painting the cribs, and Ikuo wants to do a reveal for the baby quilts he’s been making, but then the room’s done!”

He was aware that was all just...physical things, but. It was exciting! That the nursery was nearly done! The day bed they’d gotten was a trundle, so when she got older and it became her actual bed, Miya would be able to have friends over, or bring out the other bed to be luxuriant, and the frame, which they had covers in soft, friendly pillows, was modeled after leaves and vines. Kokichi was sure she was going to love it…

Smiling a little just for himself, Kokichi let out a little sigh. “...I’m really excited. I can’t wait to meet her, and every day’s a little closer to that.”

“Bonus is still part of the picture then?” Dr. Mariah noted, though she mused, “Well, that’s to be expected, it’s only been two weeks since we last spoke of them.”

“Him. It’s been confirmed.” Shuuichi pointed out, not mentioning that he really could have known the gender months ago if he had asked, but it had finally been Kaito who had asked to see the records surrounding Bonus so far. It still made Shuuichi feel a little guilty, how much more enthusiastic about this child Kaito was then Shuuichi ever had been… and how little Kaito was willing to talk about the other aspects that came with Bonus.

Kaito had, apparently, spoken to Aba at one point. But he had been pretty blunt about the fact that it had been a short visit to confirm some things about Bonus and the adoption situation, that he hadn’t wanted to talk about her or Tom or Itch to Shuuichi, and asked Shuuichi to not bring up the visit at all around Kokichi. Kaito was now the final, adult signature for everything going on with those three, and while he hadn’t seen Tom or Itch before they had been sent off to their respective, as Shuuichi thought of it, ‘gardens’, he had finished up some final paperwork confirming he knew where in the world they were and that he was to be notified if any medical or legal issues came up, in Maki’s absence.

Kaito hadn’t told Shuuichi where Itch or Tom were, and Shuuichi wasn’t going to ask. At the moment, it was just enough to know they were gone.

Kaito, in turn, also lit up, as he elaborated, “We’re still prepping just in case Bonus is gonna be around for awhile, but we actually have two interviews coming up. A family with two adopted children already heard about Bonus through the grapevine and have opened up their home if no family can be found for him in time, which was… kind of amazing, if only, well…” Kaito frowned, “They’ve got five kids in total already. I’m not saying they won’t make good parents. They’ll probably make great parents. But they’re already so busy… and I get the feeling Bonus is more of a ‘they don’t like the idea of not taking in a kid if they can’ thing, more than a ‘they actually want another kid’ thing. Like a moral obligation more than anything… so I’m not sure how I’ll personally feel about that. I could be totally off base, we’ll see how it goes in the interview… and another interview with a friend of ours-- well, a friend of Kokichi’s-- named Temp. He’s a single man, with a good job, and a house, and, well, he asked to be considered personally… honestly, I’m not a fan of the way he asked. It freaked me out, made me think he was up to something... but he seems to genuinely want a kid… so he’s got less family experience, but Bonus would probably get way more personal attention with him…”

“Is that important to you?” Dr. Mariah asked, “Personal attention?”

Kaito blinked, before he said hesitantly, “I mean… I guess? I think every kid should have someone who’s sort of devoted to them. To make them feel cared about and safe? Personal attention is, ya know… it’s good for people. Especially when they’re growing up, I think.” Glancing at Shuuichi, he said, “That’s why mentors are so important. When you don’t have a parent to who can give you that sort of attention growing up, then your mentor can make certain you still get that personalized attention… though, personally, I plan to just overflow Miya with personal attention. She can still have a mentor if she wants one, but I am gonna smother her in love.” Kaito grinned, looking excited.

Just in case. Things were really looking like Bonus was going to be adopted before he was born, but...well, the adoption process took a long time for a good reason. And for the arrival of a baby, it was much better to be over-prepared than under, so they were setting things up for Bonus just in case. And! If Temp or the other family was ready before he was born! Then they were happy to offer the clothes, blankets, toys, and crib that they’d already prepared. If the families didn’t want them, then some of the stuff could be Miya’s, but they’d probably donate the crib to Vanderdome. 

Kokichi looked over at Kaito in fondness, knowing how excited Kaito was for their daughter as well, before he gave Dr. Mariah a gentle nod. “All of the parenting books we’ve been reading, along with advice from friends and family, talk a lot about how important personal bonding is with not just a baby, but with a child of any age. Family is a baby’s first connection with the world, how they learn about emotions and communication and...in a way, how to think and learn. And...while everyone’s different?” Kokichi gave a sheepish smile. “Personally...I’ve never met someone who didn’t want to be wanted. Maybe not by everyone, but...knowing there’s at least one person that loves them, that gets excited when they’re around, that makes the decision to spend time together because it makes them happy… I think it’s at least a common thing to want. So, with our own daughter, and looking at prospective parents for Bonus, though Kai-chan’s taking the reins there for sure...it’s important to us that we know they’ll be loved.”

Dr. Mariah nodded, glancing at Shuuichi, “Any thoughts you want to add to this?”

Shuuichi looked mildly startled, before shrugging, “Nothing in particular? I’m excited for Miyako to arrive, and I’m pleased that we went from virtually no options for Bonus to two potentially very good ones, along with ourselves. When it comes to the children in our lives, things are… going remarkably well, honestly.”

“How about Timothy? Your son, Kaito. How is he handling the perspective of a new sibling? Or, the arrival of many ‘siblings’ soon?”

“Many…? Oh, no, the Sunny Care kids aren’t Tim’s siblings. He didn’t really grow up in that orphanage, so for him it’s not really the same thing as Maki. Though, I have sat down and talked with him about helping me make sure the kids feel welcomed, for the first day when they’re at the castle, before they can be sorted into their exchange families.” Kaito mused, “He seems… well, he seems the same about this as he seems about anything. My Tim’s, uh… he’s both very adaptable and…” Kaito frowned, rubbing the back of his neck as he said, “...well, it’s kinda funny. Maybe it’s just me looking for similarities because he’s mine, but for only having had him for… man, it’s been almost a year now. But for being his parents for a relatively short amount of time, Tim’s so much a mix of Maki and me… for better and for worse. He’s determined and loyal, like I am, and he’s dedicated and protective, like Maki, and thankfully he’s more adaptable to things, like Maki… he usually seems entirely fine about everything, ya know… and then… sometimes like me he’s... “ Kaito frowned, his back twitching involuntarily, “...a little violently emotional, sometimes…”

“Are you worried about how he’ll act around your daughter?”

“What? No. Tim’s going to be a great older brother. I’m certain of it. He’s so good and supportive with his friends, and I’m certain that’s going to translate to his sister.” Kaito said, absolutely certain about this.

“I was curious, since you said quite a bit without answering my first question… Shuuichi, Kokichi? How has Kaito having a child himself affected your relationship. His parenting started before both relationships started, technically. Has it affected anything?”

Well, surely it did affect things, but as for what… Kokichi sighed, scratching his cheek a little. “Really...Tim doesn’t talk to me about too much. There are a few things, and we can chat about things like school and training and Chase--she’s his dog--but… Other than a sort of affirmation that he’s taking on the responsibility or being an older sibling...he hasn’t really said too much about Miyako to me.”

And as for Kaito’s dad status… Kokichi grinned a little, feeling a bit brighter about that. “It makes me really proud and happy, seeing Kai-chan and Tim together. Tim’s a bit of a trickster, and he definitely has a mind for sass, but the two of them mesh really well, I think. Really...seeing Kai-chan be a dad to Tim helped me be brave when we found out about Miya.”

Kokichi glanced over to Shuuichi, giving him a slightly apologetic look. “We all had a talk, me, Kai-chan, Shuu-chan, Tim, Maki-chan, Tim’s nanny, Haneda-chan, and his uncle, a friend of ours, Hajime-chan, a...few months in? About who we were to Tim, and what he should expect about...life, I guess. We were talking about him starting school. And...at that time, despite having a talk with Maki-chan about her feelings for Tim…” Kokichi sighed, tugging on his hair a little. “...I was so terrified to be...looked up to that way? To be considered as...a dad, or even an uncle. I’ve never even been close to having that sort of relation and responsibility… I didn’t want to fail Tim by not...being the sort of person he needed from that position.”

“And...while it took us all a while to figure out a normal… Seeing Kai-chan take to being a dad was...really inspiring. I’m happy he and Tim have that sort of bond.”

“Oh, interesting… you all had a group discussion of expectations for Timothy?” Dr. Mariah asked, looking to Kaito for confirmation.

“Yes Sort of. Looking back, I wish me and the other adults in his life had stopped and talked about what those titles meant, before throwing them at Tim… we’re really all just sort of figuring out as we go.” Kaito chuckled dryly. 

“Most families are.” Dr. Mariah said gently, “You’re not faltering just from that.”

“Yeah? Yeah. I just want Tim to feel stable. When we first started parenting him, me and Maki couldn’t even figure out what the fuck to call me… she was his mentor, and I was just… and when I saw how fucking confused and angry and lost he was, I just…” Kaito frowned, still kind of mad at himself for how all of this had started. He hadn’t loved Tim in the beginning, but now that he did, he wished he had. He wished he had done a lot of things different, with Tim. “I just decided, well, it was time to… fucking just buck up and… fuck, I don’t know…”

“Why are you angry?”

“I don’t know...I just get frustrated with myself. I always strive to do better, but I wish it didn’t take me failing first.” Kaito sighed, running a hand through his hair, “I’m Tim’s dad. I… fuck, I wish I could claim him… officially, I mean. Give him his title. But I can’t. I can’t do that.”

Dr. Mariah thought that was interesting… but sighed, looking at Shuuichi, “Is getting information from you always going to be pulling teeth, Shuuichi?”

“Hm?” Shuuichi asked, before sighing in turn. “I didn’t have anything to say. Tim’s a good kid and I’m his uncle. What more do I need to say?”

“Has it affected the relationship?”

“Honestly? I don’t really think so. Haneda, his nanny, Maki and Kaito do all the hard work with him. As his uncle, I get to watch him play and go to school events and honestly do a bunch of other low stress things. And, honestly, it’s a bit of relief to me that Miya’s going to have an older brother like Tim. If he, as a teenager, is anything like his parents? Which, Kaito’s right, it seems like he might be? Then Miya’s always going to have someone personally watching out for her, closer to her age. It’s… it’s nice.”

...while signing the adoption papers to make Kaito one of Tim’s official guardians would be a wonderful thing in Dicea...it would only make things difficult for Tim when it came to Luminary. In some ways, as it was now, being able to just...fly under the radar when it came to Luminary was a blessing. Especially if Byakuya ever found out exactly what went down in the greenhouse, and not just the cover story that...not a lot of people close to the castle and princes actually believed, but it was a story they didn’t contradict. 

Hopefully the social relationship Kaito and Tim had was enough to tell Tim that he was loved, even if they didn’t have the papers to back it up. 

Nodding slightly, Kokichi offered Shuuichi a sweet smile. “Tim likes to show off to you… When the kids are learning something new in class he’s always telling you about it--and you guys really put the work in when you were helping him study for the spelling bees. Even if that’s all low stress stuff to Shuu-chan, it looks like the two of you really enjoy it.”

“He’s gonna be ten years older than her...but I hope they’ll get to be good friends. Siblings are special.” At least in his experience. 

“...Oh my god!”

For the first time, Dr. Marah looked startled, glancing over at Kaito with an immediately defensive look, before she relaxed, “Kaito?”

“Fuck, I don’t know when his birthday is.” Kaito realized, eyes wide with sudden horror. “What if it’s passed already!? I’m the worst father. Fuck someone take these children away from me I’m gonna ruin them.”

“No you’re not.” Shuuichi rolled his eyes, “Tim turned nine while we were traveling…. I believe his birthday is right at the start of summer, so he is turning ten soon. But we have a few months still.”

Dr. Mariah chuckled at that. “You know, usually the ‘being parents’ thing really messes with relationships. It’s honestly, for many couples, one of the biggest hurdles to get through… but you three? Between the three of you, if this conversation is any indication, and what I’m imagining the ‘impactful friend’ brings to the table… there’s a remarkable ease about it, with you all. We’ll see how you act when the infant arrives, but… you all, even you, Kokichi, who seemed to have--” maybe even has, “-- the most doubts of your ability to be… well, even just an adult in a child's life… your alls doubts and fears and expectations are surprisingly stable. Healthy, even.”

She shrugged, “I reserve the right to be proven wrong, but you all almost seem to be natural’s, when it comes to this sort of mindset.”

Kokichi didn’t think Tim would particularly want something very big for his birthday...but they should still try to make it special. It would be his first birthday with them all together as a family, after all. They should talk to Cali and Kimiko about setting up something fun, maybe a small party with the three of them, the adults moderating and bringing in some stuff, but giving the kids space to be kids. 

But! It was something they should plan! 

Kokichi looked over to Dr. Mariah, honestly a little surprised, but...he gave a soft little laugh. “Even if it’s just an impression, it is nice to hear someone say that… For our own and the kids’ sake, I hope it’s right. But in that vein…”

Giving a little nod to his partners, Kokichi turned back to their therapist with a more serious look. “We talked about taking some time away from these sessions after Miya’s born, though. We do have family and trusted friends, but...we--I only say because we talked about it--don’t really feel comfortable with all three of us being away and occupied while she’s only a few weeks old, not to mention that Shuu-chan’s gonna be in recovery.” He gave another nod to Shuuichi, his gaze a little softer. “So...we’re planning on suspending these sessions for about four weeks, and then...would it work with your scheduling to be in contact about setting something up after that?”

“We’ve read a lot, and we have a big support system, but...none of us really know what to expect once she’s born. A lot of plans are kind of in that limbo right now.”

“I understand. I’ll have to talk to my receptionist, make certain I won’t double-book myself, but… if I’m entirely honest, I’d be quite disappointed not to have time to get to know you three better. You’re all fascinating.” And delicious, “So… if scheduling future sessions takes a little more flexibility on my end? I’d be okay with doing so.” She said, nodding… before glancing over at Shuuichi, “On that note… I’ve been meaning to bring up that if attending these sessions are harder for some than others, while larger group sessions are preferable for your situation, if it’s only the two of you, there’s still merit in that…”

Shuuichi looked dryly at her… before looking down at his lap. “...moving around has been getting… harder lately…”

Kaito’s shoulders sagged. Ah geez… he had known this was coming up, but seeing the sheer disappointment in his boyfriend at having to say that out loud… any erotic fantasy of his partner needing him to wait on him hand and foot was far from Kaito’s mind as his stomach tightened in nameless shame. He had nothing to be ashamed of, really, he had tried his best to keep Shuuichi as fit and limber and on his feet through this as he could, but… well, he didn’t like the idea that Shuuichi might very soon be on bed rest. And, well, then after the birth, would definitely be on bed rest…

“...” But still. “Shuuichi, handsome, if this is all getting to be too much, you can just tell us. I’d rather you take it easier earlier than be broken later. If you need us to talk to the school or-”

“I have a few more days of school in me, and I don’t want to just be stuck in our room for the next month and a half.” Shuuichi practically growled, clearly frustrated with that idea, “I don’t want that…” he sagged a little, “But it has been harder. I might… I might need to tell the school I can’t do much more. Leaving the castle is kind of a lot lately.”

Kokichi...definitely understood that feeling, if just in a different way. Just not...feeling like you had it in you to do much, and feeling so frustrated with yourself for that feeling so...you wanted to burn yourself out, pushing for the things you wanted, but...feeling that weight of “can’t” push ever more down on you…

Yeah. He got it. 

“We have the opportunity to take most things day by day. And there are accessibility options available for you, if you want them,” Kokichi offered. “I know our situations are different, but when I couldn’t get out of bed, sometimes just...being able to go to the castle gardens with a walker or a wheelchair made my days a lot brighter. It’s not the same, but it does help, in my experience.”

Shuuichi knew Kokichi was trying to help but… there was a certain ‘graveness’ in his expression, the idea of being in a wheelchair… and Kaito quickly got up, heading over and standing behind Shuuichi’s chair, he put his arms around him and rested his chin on his head and said brightly, “Just for awhile, handsome. You don’t need a wheelchair, but I kind of love the idea of getting to push you around on one, letting you lean back and relax off your feet while I get a good workout in? Honestly, getting to dote on you like that? It’s pretty sexy…”

Shuuichi rolled his eyes, though he looked a little red in the face as he said, “Kaito. Not in front of Dr. Mariah. And I’m not letting you roll me around in a wheelchair just because it ‘excites’ you.”

“Why not? Please… come on, it sort of sounds like fun, right? Purely self-indulgent, letting everyone else put in the work while you get to relax? I think you’d love it… my sweet, prideful Shuuichi… letting me fuss over you...”

Dr. Mariah raised an eyebrow at all this. Interesting… Kaito was trying to ease Shuuichi’s fear by making it seem like a selfish, indulgent choice, rather then something he needs? That was… really very backwards, from the sort of people she usually worked with, and it was almost alarming, how poorly that would go over with almost any of her other clients… but she could taste Shuuichi’s despair fading. Changing into a mild amount of annoyance, likely at his partner, but no longer that deep fear from before. 

Kokichi nodded a bit, feeling...a little uncomfortable with the looming dread in Shuuichi’s face, but...invalidating his partner’s fear, or trying to accuse him of something was...not helpful, or the kind of thing Kokichi wanted to do. Maybe they’d have this sort of talk another time…

“It’s just an option if Shuu-chan wants to take it up,” he softly amended before Kaito took off. And...while Kaito’s reasoning of ‘sexy equals good’ wasn’t always a comfort… Kokichi sighed, giving Shuuichi a softer look. 

“It could be kind of nice. Getting back at Kai-chan for all the early mornings and track runs these past months. And while I’ve kinda been a proponent of it, Shuu-chan really gets to order us around for whatever he wants, coming up. You’re doin’ the heavy lifting for Miyako--it’s the least we can do.”

Again, Shuuichi seemed to notably relax… right. Right. This wasn’t him being weak… they were just going to dote on him a little. Pay him back for all the work he had put into carrying Miya all this time. This… this wasn’t like being on house arrest for the pollen. He wasn’t failing. He was fine… if anything, taking it easier for the next few months was him doing his family a favor…

...and because he wasn’t delusional, he gave Kokichi a grateful look, before reaching up and rubbing Kaito’s arm around himself as he said gently, “Thanks...I guess if I find getting in and out of the room a little… more challenging soon, it’d be nice if you guys lended me a hand so I didn’t have to do it myself.”

Kaito kissed the back of Shuich’s head, before he said with a grin, “Awesome. You think they’d let me spray paint a wheelchair gold? Can you imagine that? Carting you around on a gold wheelchair? That’d be amazing. Thankfully every time our Kokichi’s needed a little bit of a rest, I’ve gotten to be his personal steed, cause he’s so cute and itty-bitty.” Kaito grinned, winking at him, “But if I had needed some wheels to help me let him rest? I’d have absolutely gotten a real cool one costum made by now. Like a personal, portable throne… oh, I could put jewels on the handle!”

Shuuichi rolled his eyes, “If I even need one, I’d only need one for a little while, Kaito. Don’t get attached to the idea of custom ordering a wheelchair.”

“Awww… get silver for the wheels… not metal. Silver.”

“Sounds impractical.” Dr. Marah pointed out, glancing at the clock before saying, “Well, we’re at the end of our time. Shuuichi, I didn’t come up with a homework assignment for you in time… actually, I do have one in mind. If you end up coming to the next session-- and really, it’s okay if you find that you can’t-- I want you to come with one thing in mind that you want to share with the group. It doesn’t have to be connected to anything. Just one, personal thing that you want to share with your partners, that you haven't had the opportunity to talk about before. Do you think you could do that?”

“...I’ll think about it.” Shuuichi nodded.

People relied on each other...that was the foundation of humanity. Of community. And it was just the nature of things that some people would need help in areas others didn’t at all. Kokichi was just glad that Shuuichi would accept help if he needed it. 

He snorted a bit at Kaito dreaming up an absolutely glammed out wheelchair--the only reason Kokichi hadn’t gotten one was that, up until recently...there was nowhere he’d needed to go when he was ill or hurt. The med bay had plenty of temporary ones for guests to use, a wide variety of sizes and styles, but...mm. Maybe they should actually get a personal one… If not for Shuuichi, then for Kokichi. He’d still mostly spent his more recent bouts in bed, but...it would be nice, knowing that he could have that freedom available to him--just...entirely amused at that bit of predictable nature. 

Looking over at the clock, Kokichi nodded a little to himself--how time flew--and went to thank Dr. Mariah for her time and help when...faintly, he could hear the sound of rain patting down on the roof of the office. Kokichi’s eyes went skyward, almost able to hear the sound pick up. 

Sighing, Kokichi gave his partners a look. “Um...I can run out real quick and buy us an umbrella while you wait in the lobby?” ...they hadn’t exactly been prepared for this…

Both Kaito and Shuuichi’s eyes sort of widened, before Kaito grinned wide, while Shuuichi just immediately looked tired and worn down already. “It’s raining? Is it raining!? Awesome! I heard it was gonna start raining more soon, but I was starting to worry you all meant those little misty dribbles we get sometimes… like, come on, that’s not rain.” Kaito grinned wider, hearing the heavy pitter patter on the roof… before looking to Shuuichi, his grin fading, “Bad timing though.”

“It’s alright. I’ll be okay.” Shuuichi sighed, while Dr. Mariah got up from her chair, brushing off her dress a bit.

“It’s actually a very nice, very expensive umbrella, so I’d quite like it back if I allowed you to borrow it, but I do have an umbrella you all can take for the day if you’d like.” She offered, already heading to the door, intending to grab it from her office if they decided they wanted it. 

Kaito frowned, “Big enough for three?”

“I like my accessories a bit decadent and extravagant, so… perhaps. I’ve never tried to fit three people in it before…” she opened the door for them, before saying, “You can try it if you like.”

It was that season… It was warm enough that precipitation wouldn’t just come down as snow or hail anymore, and with the weather warming up...that meant thunder and rainstorms. Kokichi had been astonished that they hadn’t gotten many at the end of last summer and the beginning of fall, but...there had been so much going on, he was kind of glad they didn’t have to worry about it. 

...even if there was a certain magic to watching the rain pour down from behind a window...or even opening it, during hotter weather, and being relieved with the chill of the water. 

Kokichi looked at Dr. Mariah in surprise, before he gave her a concerned look. It was no fun for anyone to get caught in a rainstorm but...with all those layers of delicate fabric in the dresses she seemed to favor… “Are you sure you’ll be alright heading home yourself later? I…”

He chewed on his lip a bit. Their drainage system was pretty spectacular, if he did say so himself, but rainboots were still important… “If you really don’t mind, then once we’re home I’ll gear up and come back to return it. I’d hate to just leave you out of luck…”

Dr. Mariah shrugged lightly, “If I’m lucky, the rain will stop after a few hours, and you three are far from my last patients for the day. My work days far from done, so I won’t be leaving the office any time soon… but, if it’s one of those all day rains, then yes, I’d be a bit put out to not have it. If one of you could return it before eight? That’d be delightful.”

She went further down the hallway, and disappeared into a room, before coming out a minute later, indeed, carrying with her a short, but overly large umbrella, black and curiously sharp in its points, with decorative, lacy sheers hanging off the edges, like a hat that covers the face of a grieving widow at a funeral. It was goth and extravagant...hmmm… maybe not… quite big enough for three people…

Kaito looked between his boyfriend and husband… and said, “Babe, maybe sit on my hip? Or on my back? Shuuichi hanging on my arm to keep him steady… we’d probably fit well enough that way.”

With an offer like that, Kokichi felt a bit better about accepting a ‘nice, very expensive’ umbrella. And, after actually seeing the thing, he was doubly glad he’d offered to run it back sooner. It looked like one of those ‘only three made, but all slightly different’ custom pieces that came from one of those really niche specialty artisan shops… He’d seen one of the pop-ups during a free market event, and while everything was impeccably made and extremely stylish, the price had made his heart jump. It was fair, of course, but...ooph. 

Kokichi sighed softly, looking at the already becoming heavy rain outside and...yeah, he didn’t want to offer to walk beside them… He couldn’t afford to get sick right now. Circling behind Kaito, Kokichi tapped him on the shoulder. “Lean down so I can get up; I don’t wanna choke ya jumping. And...maybe Shuu-chan can hold the handle, and Kai-chan can put his arms around him, so we’re all consolidated around the center? Everyone has support and we all stay dry.”

“What, can’t climb, shortie?” Kaito teased, leaning down, though…. Mmmmm, Kokichi choking him? That could be fun… though, watching him try would probably end up more adorable than sexy. Sweet little wrists, thin little fingers… eh, he wouldn’t like it. Kokichi would probably just end up feeling guilty and alarmed by it… though, mmmm… Kaito loved putting his own hands around Kokichi’s neck… feeling that little thump of his pulse, getting more and more excited against his thumbs… that glazed, breathless, giddy look on his face… the way Kokichi’s tongue sometimes peeked out of his mouth as he was panting, cute and desper-

“Kaito?” Shuuichi called for the second time.

“Right! Thank you so much for the umbrella, Dr. Mariah! We’ll get it back to you in a few hours at most!” Kaito suddenly said far too loudly, bowing to her with Kokichi on his back, before straightening up, “Come here, Shuuichi, let’s get home and get you off your feet, handsome.”

The three headed out into the storm, and honestly, the positioning worked shockingly well, the umbrella designed to catch the rain from any direction the wind was blowing it, the sheers protecting them extremely well. They moved slowly, Shuuichi putting a good amount of his weight on Kaito, who matched his steps. “...that went well, I think.” Katio said, “This session felt shorter somehow, didn’t it?”

“Oh, if you really wanted me to rub my shoes on your clothes that badly,” Kokichi had shot back with a roll of his eyes, but he gently settled himself on Kaito’s back, bracing his thighs against his husband’s hips and doing what he could to support and adjust the majority of his own weight so Kaito would be free to support Shuuichi. And...it really seemed to work!

And even better, Kokichi didn’t even really feel his butt getting wet. 

“Mm,” Kokichi hummed, just above Kaito’s ear. “I was really surprised… Like, an hour and a half isn’t super long, but it felt really quick today, yeah.” His guess was because it didn’t feel like she had pressed them all that much, but...well, the pressing had been focused on Shuuichi that day. So it still happened. 

“...I’m glad we’re going. It’s hard, but...I want this kind of growth for us, you know? To be able to talk to each other…” Kokichi sighed, adjusting himself slightly. “...have you guys ever seen my rainboots? They look like frogs! I’m a little worried about this turning into a thunderstorm, so I’m gonna deck myself up in everything when I do the run back.”

“Babe, I have literally no intention of leaving you to go back into this storm.” Kaito said blankly, as Shuuichi leaned his head against his shoulder, idly giving the top of Shuuichi’s head a kiss as he continued, “We’re getting you and Shuuichi home and warmed up in front of the fire and then I’m putting on my green hooded cape and I’ll bring the umbrella back.”

...okay, as nice as that sounded…

Kokichi pouted. “...you don’t even have a proper raincoat. Or rainboots, the last time I checked. And...well, I can show you where our umbrellas are, but still! And I’m quick! You and Shuu-chan can get started relaxing, and I’ll be back lickity-split! Besides, you’re way better at foot rubs than I am, right Shuu-chan?”

“Mmm, that’s true…” Shuuichi said softly, almost a hum. Soothed and a little sleepy now, listening to the sound of the rain against the umbrella. “...you do give pretty good foot rubs, Kaito-”

Pretty good? Pretty good? Who in all of the earth had given Shuuichi a better foot rub!?

“-... and Kokichi in little frog rain boots sounds pretty cute…”

Kaito hesitated…. Before saying, “No. Not… not this time, Kokichi. Later, next time, when you’re not as…” clearly on the verge of something, “... worn out. I don’t want you out running around in the rain by yourself. I’m insisting.”

...he was monumentally better about it these days, but…

Kokichi stiffened. “...I’m fine. I can do something as simple as walk in the rain. I’m not saying I’m gonna go out and get myself soaked like an idiot. I’m gonna gear up and be safe.”

“...I’m not made of glass…”

Kaito opened his mouth… and closed it. Not sure what to do next. He really, really didn’t like the idea of Kokichi going back out into the storm by himself. Kokichi was always so tired these days… what if he got sick? What if he got a fever… or fucking… ngh…

… but he didn’t want to undermine his husband either. Both because it’d hurt Kokichi’s feelings, and also because, like… he didn’t want to undermine his husband…

“I know you’re not, Kokichi.” Kaito conceded, backing off. “...Alright. I’ll have something warm for you to drink when you get back. Any requests?”

Kokichi relaxed...and immediately felt a little bad for...fucking, being a brat. But he’d made the bed now. 

“Thank you…” Gently, Kokichi placed a kiss on the back of Kaito’s ear. “Could you see if we still have some of that blueberry mint tea? If not, just something fruity, but not citrus-y. There’s something nice about that kind of flavor while it’s pouring outside… And I promise, I’ll be careful, and I’ll be back before you know it, okay? I’ll be alright.”

...he wasn’t feeling great these days. He knew, sometimes, you felt a little worse before you’d feel better, but...

...it’d been months, now, that he’d been working with Cedar, doing her weird treatments multiple times a week. His problems were severe, and they’d take a lot of time and effort to solve, he got that. But...Kokichi was just so ready not to feel like this any more. 

And if he was going to feel like this for months? He didn’t want people to treat him like he couldn’t do anything. He was disabled, not made of glass or braindead. He just needed different accommodations to do the same things practically anyone else could do. And Kokichi, while he shouldn’t have whined like that...didn’t want his freedoms to start disappearing with walking in the rain. 

“...promise. I’m okay.”

Kaito nodded, “‘Course babe. I’ll check our stock, it’ll be nice.”

Kaito knew that he was technically still doing something wrong. Kokichi didn’t like him conceding just because it was Kokichi asking… but, well, he had said no twice, and Kokichi had still insisted. What was Kaito going to do, order him? 

… maybe in a different life, yeah. 

But, well... that’s what made Atua a good, just god. Not putting Kaito in a position where he’d have just been one more asshole forcing Kokichi to sit and stay out of concern for his health. Sure, Kaito wanted to, sometimes… but those were just moments of weakness. His fears overwhelming his faith in his husband. And Kokichi probably would be fine. Definitely. Definitely would be fine. If Kokichi said he could do it, then he could do it.

...and yeah, Kaito would have the room warm and warm drinks ready and everything ready when he got back.

Shuuichi, in turn, didn’t comment on any of this. He just leaned against Kaito, content to let the two of them work this dynamic out on their own. Personally, he thought Kaito was being a little overprotective, but Kokichi was being a little overdramatic. They were both making a simple trip out into the rain more than it needed to be. And, well… they’d work it out between them.

-

It did, in fact, go fine. 

The rain had gotten heavier, as Kokichi had worried, but it really was no match for his frog boots with a personal matching umbrella--though, he had invested in a bigger one the previous fall, after he and Kaito had asked out Shuuichi (and...going out hadn’t been as daunting after his kidnapping)--and rain-patterned long jacket! He made good time back to Dr. Mariah’s office--with her umbrella mostly dry--and, having missed her receptionist again, he supposed, had left it in an empty cubby in the front desk, making extra sure that nothing would be ruined and the umbrella would be safe. 

The trip back had been fine too, most people not stopping to chat as, far in the distance, quiet thunder started to rumble. 

Really, the most excitement Kokichi had was running into Kirumi when he returned to the castle, the older woman fussing over him and coaxing him out of his jacket and boots and into awaiting slippers--guest ones, which he was a little comforted by, because it would be way too weird if she’d gotten his slippers from his room and had been waiting by the door for him--and pressed a towel all over him before shooing him upstairs, promising to have his clothes dry and cleaned by the end of the day. 

It was a little overbearing, in the way Kirumi’s efficiency could be, but there was something familiarly comforting in it. 

Knocking softly before he entered, Kokichi had a slightly sheepish look on his face as he went into their room, the ends of his hair hanging a little heavy and the tops of his socks a little damp, but home safe and sound. “I’m back!”

Kaito looked back over his shoulder, before quickly putting a finger up to his mouth, pointing at Shuuichi, who halfway through Kaito’s foot massage had drifted off, breathing softly as he laid on his side, arms curled around one of the bigger pillows, Kaito still working on the muscles of his ankles, because awake or asleep, the massage would make things easier on him the next day. 

Though, he put Shuuichi’s foot down to get off the bed, giving Kokichi a look over, before pulling him into a hug, kissing the top of his head and rubbing his back a bit as he said, “Welcome back. I’ve got tea ready. You’re in luck, we still had the blueberry mint. Though, I’m going to try drinking down the last of that shitty beer today. It’s been over a month now, I need to just drink it or we need to dump it… what happened to your… clothes?” Kaito asked, looking down at Kokichi’s slippers and lack of rain coat.

Kokichi pressed into the hug lovingly, giving a look with the same feeling to their sleeping partner on the bed, though Kokichi eagerly tapped over to collect his mug. Mmmm...perfect for a rainy day. 

“Kirumi got to me. I think she and the others have been keeping an eye on the front door for visitors since the rain started--easier to clean everything when you can stop most of the water and mud right at the door, right? She gave me a towel and took my stuff to dry on the racks so I’m not tracking in all that stuff.”

Kokichi sighed, his nose wrinkling a bit at the mention of the awful beer Kaito had gotten from Waku. But...it was packaged and everything… “...I’ll take one can, help you finish it. Hopefully I can wash out the taste with my tea...even if drinking so much is gonna make me use the bathroom for the rest of the afternoon.” He snorted, rolling his eyes at the sort of joke. 

“Have you guys been able to hear the thunder from here?”

Going to grab the half full case of beer-- they really, really hadn’t gotten far with it the first time they had tried to-- from the side of the closet, Kaito said, “We couldn’t at first, but I opened up the window a little. I think between the cackle of the fire and the sound of the rain, Shuuichi didn’t stand a chance… it’s nice.” Kaito said, passing Kokichi a can before heading over to the window seat himself, taking a seat and just…

...it really was incredibly pretty sounding. The pitter patter of rain, both again the glass of the window and the tiling of the roof, the wind whistling slightly whenever it upticked, and the low, rumble of thunder in the distance, all surrounded by the backdrop of the fire cackling and spitting in the safety of its hearth.

As Kaito cracked open his shitty beer, listening to the sounds… he said, “Did you know there’s a rumor that one of the guards has a pee desperation kink?”

It’d be comfortable enough just sitting on the side of the bed, and Kokichi didn’t think he’d disturb Shuuichi...but he still moved a chair over to sit across from Kaito, able to see out the window past his husband and listen to the rain. “It’s horrible to get caught in, and if it rains a ton it can cause damage...but there’s always been something comforting in the sound, to me. I hope everyone gets home alright, but...I kinda hope it lasts all night.”

Cracking open the why-aren’t-you-just-regular-water can, Kokichi braced himself to take a gulp...and nearly spat it all out, ending up dribbling just a bit out the sides of his mouth before swallowing, looking over at Kaito with wide, incredulous eyes. “Seriously? Who’s even spreading a rumor like that!?”

(Luckily, he remembered to keep his voice down, despite the intensity of those exclamation marks.)

After a moment, Kokichi gave his husband a slightly wary look. “...this isn’t just you trying to broach the subject, right?”

Kaito couldn’t help but laugh, grimacing through his laughter as he also took a sip of his ‘seriously, who thought this was acceptable and bottled this??’ can of beer, as he lied, “I don’t remember. I think I just overheard it somewhere. Maybe I misheard…”

Then, snickering, he said, “Oooh, Kokichi, the second night of our marriage, when I was running you to the bathroom? Fireworks. Never been so turned on in my life. But, heh, I’m not gonna lie, I was curious if you’d even know what I was talking about. Kokichi… where’d you learn about something like that?” Kaito asked, a clear tease in his tone, raising an eyebrow. “Is it in one of your books, you little shut-in? Which one?”

Kokichi gave his husband a dry look, though there was still amusement glittering in his eyes. “It’s kind of obvious from the name, hun. There are probably a lot of kinks out there I don’t know the name of--’cause like hell was I ever gonna ask someone to buy me those kinds of books,” despite the fact that they owned one now, though it was Kaito’s, “But there are a few you can figure out from the name.”

“Now,” he hummed, his amusement a little more apparent as he smirked at his husband, “I bet there are pleeeenty of naughty things our resident pro has learned in his years being a sexually active adult. Kai-chan could definitely teach me a lot in this field, I bet.”

Kaito chuckled, before looking sadly down at his equally sad beer, as he lamented, “Man, I wish we had some warm cider, or at least had hot chocolate with rum or whiskey in it… I’d love to be drinking something that actually tastes good and has some alcohol actually in it. This stuff is pathetic.”

He took another long gulp and winced around it. Ugh.

“Well, one thing I can tell you is that that people have as many entirely unrealistic kinks as they do realistic ones. Like, things you really, physically cannot do. Ever heard of vore?”

“You could’ve gotten yourself something warm while you got my tea. Dunno about the alcohol side though.”

Kokichi shrugged a bit before narrowing his eyes, trying to...vore? He looked at Kaito curiously. “...is it...like… over the top violence? Like, combining violence and gore...vore. But, obviously, you wouldn’t wanna kill your partner…”

He narrowed his eyes a little more. “...is that what you thought I had, when you said you thought I had a murder kink?”

“Decent guess. I could see that...and there probably is some fancy word for being turned on by your life being threatened, but I don’t know it. Maybe it’s a type of masochism? I don’t know… but, no.”

“Vore is the idea of swallowing someone, or being swallowed, whole… I think. I think you have to be swallowed whole for it to count as vore. I know that was true for the person who taught me it.” Kaito said, sipping at his shitty beer, leaning against the window wall frame, watching the rain hit the window, “Nice girl, super sweet, very polite and a little shy, with these big, wide glasses… she showed me pages and pages and pages of drawings she had made of people swallowing tiny versions of each other. Tiny people on plates waiting to be eaten, tiny people going down throats, in stomachs, halfway in someone’s mouth. The tiny people always looked a little worried about it too. Not terrified. Just… concerned. Alarmed. She had… quite a few of me.” Kaito mused, “She was really into it. Unfortunately, not really something I could accommodate…”

He grinned at Kokichi, shrugging slightly, “Ah well. It wasn’t hurting anyone, so long as she wasn’t actually eating anyone. Which I don’t think would even count, in any way she could actually do it, cause again, I think part of it was they had to be swallowed whole. Just fun, weird fantasy stuff.”

Kokichi blinked. Then again, taking a swing of his shitty beer, and not even grimacing at it. “...huh. Yeah, can’t...really say I’ve ever run into that before…”

...what a weird one. Though, Kokichi couldn’t judge--if it was just a fun fantasy, then good for her. 

“Though…” he hummed, tilting his head. “I have imagined you tiny. Not small enough to even fit in my mouth, and not even in a sexy way, but… I dunno. It’s just the image of you, like...as one of my little cartoon drawings, but as a real, three dimensional person. All cute and simplified.”

He looked around, trying to see where his sketchbook might be, but when he saw it was across the room on one of the bookshelves...Kokichi just shrugged, not that concerned with showing Kaito an example. He was warm and cozy and had a cup of tea waiting for him after he finished his can. 

“Again, I don’t think it’s a sexy thing for me...but it’s kind of a cute thought, imagining a little cartoon version of you that I can hold in my arms, and of course you’d reach up to try and give me kisses all the time…” Kokichi laughed softly. “I also kind of imagine, like...that version of you in space? Swimming in stardust and leaping from planet to planet… Honestly, I think this might’ve been a dream that I just forgot about.”

Kaito grinned at all of that, complimenting, “You have a beautiful imagination, babe… a cute, tiny version of me flying through space? That sounds nice, honestly…. And, oh man, that’d make you huge to me… I could be totally into that. That might not be a sexy fantasy to you, but I’d be all over a giant Kokichi’s dick.” Kaito chuckled, sipping at his beer some more, getting used to it again. “Mind you, I can get a little into anything… though, I’ve been thinking about what you said? About how my fantasies about Shuuichi might be more about the fact that it’s Shuuichi?” 

“And I think you might have a point… I think I find it so easy to get into all this random stuff because I like the person, usually, who’s introducing it to me. It’s more me being attracted to the person rather than whatever thing they ask of me, ya know? I mean… looking back at it?” Kaito tapped his fingers against the can, frowning a little, “In… really most of my relationships, or even my flings, I never really brought anything into the bedroom. I just had such a reputation by that point… honestly, I think for a long time there people got with me specifically to try out some of their weirder ideas. Like… cause they knew I’d just roll with it? There were a lot of things that definitely felt like experiments. Things they hadn’t tried before and maybe never did again afterwards… not that I really minded. I loved the attention.”

Tapping at his can some more… Kaito confessed, “There were maybe a few things I actually really didn’t like all that much. Outside of the thing I’ve mentioned in our boundaries talk. I mean, you can still do them, if it hasn’t occurred to you yet to try it, I’m fine. But, like…” Kaito frowned, scrunching up his nose a little, “One guy shoved my face into his armpit. Like, out of nowhere. And I don’t mean a little bit, or maybe by accident- dude fucking held me there. I have… no idea what he got out of it. Like, it’s not like he was smelling me, which maybe I could get, him having a thing for the smell of sweat or something? Why did I have to smell him??” Kaito asked, looking genuinely befuddled, all those years later, “Like… what??”

Kokichi snorted softly, and...it was a little easier to ignore the weird thought that popped up this time. (Does Chibi Kaito want to fuck me???) It was very Kaito...and...maybe being very Kaito meant...just being excited because he’s with people he likes. 

Kokichi nodded a bit, finally setting his can to the side and curling up around his mug, eagerly sipping at it to cover up the taste of bad water. “Hmm… Like...I’ve heard about people that...like, they’re almost demisexual? But instead of only being attracted to people they’ve known a long time it’s...just being attracted to specific people, instead of broader strokes like liking men or women or, yanno. But...you’re like that, for kinks. There are a few things that are blanket no’s, but...mostly? You’re just into the person, and if a kink comes with it, then you’ll be for it.”

Of course with exceptions. 

“...armpits?” Kokichi raised an eyebrow, just as confused as he’d been with the vore thing, though this was at least a little easier to conceptualize. “I...don’t even think that’s related to, like, a scenting kink, but...huh. You really never know what people will be into.”

Thinking for a moment, Kokichi tipped his head into the side of the chair, getting comfy--and resting his body. “...I assume you probably would’ve brought something up, but...I mean. Even if you’ve never really brought a lot of stuff to the bedroom...are there any kinks you think you’d wanna try out with me?”

“Mmmm…” Kaito paused to actually think about it, gulping down the last of his beer, before setting it aside and taking a full can, begrudgingly poppin it open and resigning himself to more of it as he still considered, “...I mean, lots of random things always come to mind, but those are more daydreams than anything… actually… this might be okay to bring up now…”

Kaito playing with the can in his hand, Kaito gave his husband a serious look as he said, “This isn’t me asking you to be… I’ve just… I don’t want you to think that there’s a ‘right’ answer to this. There isn’t. I have no expectations, or even any desires about it. I’m just asking because it occurred to me a few times and… anyway. Kokichi, do you… do you think you have any masochist tendencies? Desires? Anything like that?”

Maybe one day Kaito would feel up to sharing some of those daydreams, but Kokichi wasn’t going to push if Kaito didn’t want to share. It could be something fun to talk about in the future. 

But...while Kaito didn’t really have his tells for something...upsettingly serious, Kokichi could feel himself grow worried at his husband’s extended preamble. He knew it was just to...well, do exactly as he said, and not place any weird expectations on Kokichi, but...it still made him worry. 

But not enough to make Kokichi sigh and disregard the question when Kaito actually asked it. Instead, Kokichi just...took a moment to think. About himself, and all the times he and Kaito had been together.

“...I’ve never thought about myself that way,” he landed on. “I mean...I like it when you lightly choke me, and I like it when you’re a little rough...but I’ve never really...thought about those things as being masochism?” He squinted a little, looking up at his husband, but just...talking out his thoughts. “I’ve never thought, or been excited by something like, ‘oh, I want to be hurt’. It’s more…”

Kokichi’s cheeks went a little pink. “I like that dizzy feeling when I can’t breathe for a moment, and I know it’s not just coming from my body. And I like the feeling of how big you are in me, that I have to stretch to fit you. And...that you don’t have to...hold back, or constantly watch yourself when you’re with me...though I know that’s not exactly right from your side…”

There was something a little sad in Kokichi’s eyes, but he continued on, lips curling into a small smile. “...and I like the feeling, sure, of you biting me, but...it’s one of my favorite things, to see a new bruise in the morning, and know that it came from you. That I’m yours, and you like me enough to claim me in that way… That’s still a little too much thought into it, I think, but it makes me happy to see the marks you leave.”

Kaito grinned a little, excited by Kokichi’s fluster, and turned on by Kokichi’s descriptions… but… 

He nodded, “You’re right… that’s not really masochism. Some of it sounds close, but… when you put it all into context together? It sounds more like you just like the excitement of a lot of activity. Which, good! I like to excite you. It’s fun.” Kaito laughed, before leaning his head against the wall, looking fondly at Kokichi, “And, like I said, that’s totally fine. I just felt like I should ask…”

Pausing, hesitating a little… Kaito laughed lightly, “I have some masochist tendencies. Some sadist tendencies too. I doubt the sadism stuff surprises ya, but for the masochism… well, maybe that wouldn’t surprise you either.” Kaito shrugged, rolling his eyes at himself a little, “When I told you I don’t like to be hit or called names… I mean, that’s still true. But that’s because I’ve found that people who do that… there’s a difference, seriously, between someone treating you badly because you both like it, and someone treating you badly to hurt you for real. I do like, sometimes, being treated a little badly… pain, stress, all that nonsense. I just don’t like feeling like I’m in some sort of fight. Like the person I’m sleeping with hates me, or something…”

Kaito paused, lost in his thoughts… before he said, snickering a little, “I have some fantasies I know you won’t do. That’s okay. Can I share them anyway?”

Kokichi nodded a little with that same smile. “It is fun. And...I’m glad I could give you an answer? When it comes to sex, I’m still kind of inexperienced… If there’s some observation you’ve made, then I’m definitely gonna consider it. All that good communication stuff, and, hey, maybe I’ll learn something new about myself!”

And new things about Kaito too, though...yeah, learning that he had some of both sadistic and masochistic tendencies wasn’t much of a surprise. But it was still enlightening to hear Kaito’s musings about it. “Mm...that makes sense to me. Like...hate fucks are a thing for some people, but...I mean, I’ve told you my view before. Sex always feels very intimate, emotionally. It makes sense to me that you’d like it to be a fun, positive thing, even if you dip into kinks that have to do with pain and stress. Those don’t have to be mutually exclusive.”

Taking a long sip from his tea, Kokichi rested his mug just behind his knees, his legs almost curled to his chest, but more just to be comfortable in the chair than because of any sort of discomfort. “Of course! Even if it doesn’t happen, I always love hearing Kai-chan’s thoughts, even the sexy ones. Though...there are times and places for them,” he giggled with a raised eyebrow. “Luckily, this is one of them.”

He gave Kaito a little nod, encouraging him. 

Kaito chuckled, though even before saying anything, his neck and ears had already gotten red. A little flustered just at having permission to talk about it, sipping his can of beer obnoxiously to give himself a minute.

Beer thoroughly sipped, Kaito started with, “Well, the least scandalous one is just one you can’t do for physical reasons. And I’ve told you about this before: I have this fantasy of just pulling you away in the middle of the day, just finding some corner or bringing you back to the bedroom or some other comfortable, private place and just ravaging you… and then you just going about your day again.” Kaito looked incredibly fond of the simple daydream, shrugging a little sheepishly as he said, “It’s not a big deal that we can’t do it, and honestly, you getting all peaceful and sleepy after sex is pretty fucking cute, every time. But yeah, I get distracted by that daydream quite a bit.”

Kokichi chuckled softly, able to laugh at himself a bit for this fantasy. “Awww, hun. Maybe one day? My stamina might get better at some point, ya never know. But...that’s a sweet one. I’ll give ya this.”

He held up a finger, punctuating his words. “If I didn’t always need to crash after sex? I’d help you fulfil that daydream, no problem. It sounds kinda fun, squirreling away a little time in the middle of the day, having some fun together...then continuing on with the rest of the stuff we need to do. Before I knew how loud I like to be during sex, your talk about pulling me into a closet and having fun really made me blush to think about, you know.”

Laughing a little more, Kokichi grinned at his husband. “So? A more scandalous one?”

Now Kaito looked a little more embarrassed, squirming ever so slightly, chewing ever so slightly on his bottom lip before he stopped himself-- chapped lips were not sexy, at least as far as Kaito was concerned, not on himself-- licking at his bottom lip to the sooth the bite as he said, “Okay, uh… this is also probably not surprising. You got me bad during our time in the hot tub, so you’ve probably worked this out yourself… but I uh…”

Kaito brought up the can of beer and seemed to try to hide behind it a little bit as he laughed sheepishly, “I like the idea of almost getting caught. Doing it in risky, public places… risking getting into trouble. It’s so exciting. I imagine us…” Kaito’s face went beat red, a wobbly grin on his face as he got heated, “... at parks and… alleyways and… honestly, kind of everywhere. I came so close to--” Kaito paused, worrying he was saying too much, “--... I had to remind myself that those are pure fantasy things, while we were at the playground. That slide, babe… I couldn’t go anywhere near that slide with you. I’d have made a pass at ya, and I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable being tempted to try. That time at the theater… phooooo.”

Kaito let out a little, overwhelmed breath at the memory, “I was losing it for a second there… if you had let me? I’d have gone wild on that balcony. And, thank god you didn’t let me! Could you imagine if we had done anything and Hina came up? Fuck, you’d have died on the spot, and I wouldn’t have been far behind ya.” Kaito chuckled, shaking his head… before his shoulders slumped a little, “These aren’t expectations. I never want to scare you. Just cause I get… a little excited sometimes, doesn’t mean you ever have to indulge me. I don’t want to scare you.”

Kokichi nodded slightly and...yeah. This one was total fantasy, though it had been close a few times. Personally...he couldn’t stand the thought of anyone catching them. Of anyone even knowing any sort of specifics about their sex life. But...Kaito knew this. 

Giving Kaito a soft look, Kokichi wished he was curled up next to his husband so he could give him a kiss. It was something he could easily go over and do, but...he was comfortable. “You don’t scare me, hun. Even if it’s fun for you to think about, you never push me to make it happen, and you always stop when I get uncomfortable… Just the sort of thing I can expect from my respectable Kai-chan.”

“Even if you’re tempted,” he shrugged, “The fact that you rein yourself in just makes you cooler. I know we tease sometimes about your sex drive, but...Kai-chan isn’t a slave to desire. He makes a lot of conscious and conscientious decisions all the time to consider the needs and wants of the people he cares about…”

“And that?” Kokichi winked. “Is something I find very sexy.”

His next chuckle was softer, more just… sentimental and fond as he said quietly, “Thanks Kokichi… I really always want to live up to that…”

And then he said, like he was a little surprised at himself, “Sometimes I fantasize about you just being an asshole to me.”

Shaking his head, he continued, “It’s so bizarre. I wouldn’t even really want this in real life. I imagine just, like, doing a bunch of nice things for you, waiting on you hand and foot, and you just fucking trashing me for it. Like, being such a brat, way more than you’ve definitely ever been in real life. You just treat me like garbage. I swear, not something I want to really happen, but man, has that leaked into my daydreams more often than I can really understand… maybe not as much recently.” He admitted, shrugging, “But for awhile there? Constantly.”

Getting out that really weird, random fantasy he kept having, Kaito relaxed, “The rest… well, again, I get a bunch of random ideas, like you in special costumes and settings and stuff-- gold jewelry, and overalls and stuff. And… I like the idea of treating you like you’re a Luminary style king. All decadence and demur and referential… and…” he seemed more embarrassed by this, before admitting, “Sometimes… I like to reverse that role… uh, I mean, like… I don’t know.” He muttered, clearly finding that last fantasy more actually embarrassing than all the rest, on a personal level, “Like you… uh… like you… call me kingly stuff and… stuff like that. Not very often! Just, ya know… sometimes. For fun.”

Kokichi’s eyes widened a bit, certainly not expecting that one. Sure, he could be a brat sometimes, but...treating someone like garbage? And especially after they went out of their way to be exceedingly kind… Kokichi didn’t think he could even bring himself to do something like that in a joking way; he’d just feel like such an awful asshole that it’d get him out of the mood immediately. 

However, one of the other things…

“...I dunno how well I’d do, treating you like Luminous royalty...I mean, in that way,” Kokichi softly started. “But...doting on you? Calling you my king? I could get behind that… Kai-chan’s so cute sometimes, I do wanna dote on him. And while the names are more just fun for me, I wouldn’t mind doin’ it with more weight.”

Kokichi thought for a moment, debating on whether to even tell Kaito this...but he apparently decided to, with a soft smile. “You know...when I’m leader? The people who still call that position ‘king’...they’re gonna call you ‘king’ too, you know. Even if by Luminous definition you’re a consort, all that’s too fussy for those folks. If I’m the king, then the king’s husband is also a king. Simple as that.”

Kaito glanced up at Kokichi, before looking back down at his beer. He… didn’t really understand. Even by Dicean standards… he wasn’t…

“Kokichi, can I ask…” Kaito frowned, tapping at his shitty beer, “... was Queen Miyako an Ouma? Did she take the vow?”

Knowing how Kaito felt about all that--which was why Kokichi had hesitated in even telling him--Kokichi knew that Kaito wasn’t going to be, like, over the moon hearing that. Really, the quiet contemplation seemed just about what he expected, even if Kokichi couldn’t have predicted the question. 

“She was, and she did…” Kokichi’s gaze went a little far away, but just to the window, watching the rain pelt the glass. “She was still mainly working on her space surveys… My parents hadn’t even been married a year before...before she passed. But...people tell me that she had been excited to help make Dicea a better place. To help our people.”

“She...she thought that the more educated people were, the better a society could be. That if everyone knew how to learn, and how to articulate their thoughts then...then everyone would be able to pitch in their ideas. Debate about them. Figure out what would be best…”

Kokichi sighed, feeling that old, deep longing. It had been a long time since he’d gone up to speak to the portrait in the observatory. “It was one of her proposals that got implemented, that lets anyone go to university… Back in the day, apparently, there were a bunch of tests and essays you had to submit, to see if you’d be able to keep up with the rigors of college...but she argued that that wasn’t the right way to think about education. It should adapt to students’ needs, not the other way around. Now, there are still a bunch of tests you need to do when you enroll, but...it’s just to recommend classes. Helping you get up to a level of more in-depth discussion if you’re not there yet. It became more pervasive for high and primary schools too, to give more specialized instruction to students...let them study things that interest them, and try to teach other subjects through that lens too. Try to make it so you never feel like you’re learning something you’re never gonna use, you know…?”

Kokichi took a deeper breath. “My dad said that...if she could be the spurs for huge things like that in under a year, while she was newly married and pregnant...people would’ve forgotten all about him for how much good my mom would’ve done… He...he said that he sees that same kind of potential and legacy in me…”

Kaito listened to this quietly, ignoring the mix of feelings inside of him, even if they licked through his stomach and struck through his chest like little, sick acids… and he gave Kokichi a small smile as he said, “You, Kokichi? Absolutely… you’re going to do amazing things. Hell, you’ve barely started, and I already think you do amazing things. People adore you, out there… you help so many of them. They revere you…”

… which was why anyone who thought to call Kaito ‘king’ was an idiot who didn’t know the meaning of the word. 

It wasn’t just a word. It was a title. One that meant something to Kaito… one that Kokichi was both born into and suited him, which in theory was what you always hoped for in any king. His Kokichi… his divine being… the Light of Dicea. One of Atua’s chosen representatives, through marriage.

… who came from a lineage of people who were also suited to their titles. In a way Kaito could never be, and he knew it. He could never think the way an Ouma does… and he wasn’t competent enough to be a king in the Luminary sense either.

Being called ‘king’ was just a sometimes sexy fantasy, and one that embarrassed Kaito. A chicken daydreaming about flying with the doves. Embarrassing in how pathetically laughable it was.

Kaito grinned and said entirely sincerely, “I bet Miyako’s gonna take after you and her grandmother… between you and the queen and Shuuichi? How could she not? She’s gonna be so smart… you’re going to give her so much to live up to.” Kaito laughed, “Poor girl. At least she’ll have an amazing example to follow.”

Kokichi smiled bashfully...but it made him warm to hear. He really did want to help people. To make sure that his people were happy and safe and free to follow their hearts’ desires… To live. Sometimes, he really didn’t feel like more than a pencil pusher, but...making sure their kingdom was in order was a big job. Just as important as bringing in ideas. And there was something a little magical, in his opinion, about being able to make people’s ideas into reality. 

Maybe that was the sort of leader he wanted to be. Granting people’s dreams. 

A leader could be a lot of things, and they could be any person. At the end of the day, that’s just what a leader was--a person. But the choices that people made...they did amazing things. To destroy the world or bring utopia...it was all in the choices of everyday people. (Because gods were left to the whims of the humans that believed in them.)

Kokichi snorted softly, giving Kaito a warm look. “As if you’re not a great example and legacy to live up to too. If she learns even half of your prowess of making smiles… She’s really gonna take the world by storm.”

It was a lot to put on a baby, on a child, on a single person...but there was something just...so nice, about thinking about how wonderful their daughter could be. Parents always did want the best for their children. 

Smiles, huh? Maybe that’d be something she’d learn from him. Honestly, by this point in his life, Kaito didn’t really know what Miyako would take from him, because he… wasn’t entirely certain what he had to offer, in Dicea. Beyond being support for his personal family? He was just sort of… well, he was figuring things out. Maybe it’d be enough to just… do this?

There was a young man inside of himself who had wanted to grow up to be… all sorts of things that was just… so disappointed by that thought. But that young man was a child and Kaito was an adult. He’d adjust his goals and desires to his new reality, and that reality was that, to Kaito at least, there wasn’t anything more urgent or important to work on than his family. 

And if there were times where he felt… small? Because of that?

Well, those moments would pass. 

Kaito grinned, still a little sad, but reassured by his own mental pep talk as he said, “I’ll definitely teach her some tricks, but she’s not gonna need it. People are going to love her. She’s yours. They’re going to dote on the child of their favorite celebrity… did that chick ever find you again to get you to sign her sisters poster?”

Kokichi just...looked over at Kaito fondly. It wasn’t an uncommon thought for him, to wish that Kaito gave himself as much credit he gave others. His husband was really an amazing person. So full of love and enthusiasm and passion and...a sort of magnetism that could bring people together like nothing else. Miya really was going to have her pick of things to take from them, and Kokichi couldn’t be happier for it. 

Snorting softly, Kokichi giggled. “She did, came by mid-morning and asked to see me. She understood that I was at work an’ all, but we did chat a bit, and I wrote a nice message for her sister--I hope she likes it. It’s a little novel for me… Being called a stud too.”

“You are a stud.” Kaito said immediately, snickering a little, though even as he teased, he couldn’t help the way his eyes traveled Kokichi’s body. “Are you kidding? I could see why some, I’m assuming, teenage girl would want to put you on her wall. Those big, purple eyes on that thin, quick body? You’re probably starring in a lot of people’s daydreams. They’re studly, beautiful prince, hair all done up, looking all regal and put together at the festival-”

Kaito got up from the window seat, acting out the role of Kokichi as he said, far too dramatically, “-and he turns just as the fireworks go off behind him, looking back, and your eyes meet-- you being the daydreaming commoner, just to clarify--” Kaito grinned, giving Kokichi a wink, before holding out a hand to him as he continued dramatically, “And the Dicean Prince puts out his hand with that knowing, suave smirk on his face and says…”

Running a hand through his hair with his free hand, smirking and raising an eyebrow, he said in a low, sultry voice, “‘Ey. Wanna come up and... “ Eyebrow waggle, “...see my work desk?”

“Pffffffffffffff.” 

It was all Kokichi could do to not burst out laughing, and it was only the knowledge of how grumpy Shuuichi would be to be woken up that gave him the strength to stifle it, though his shoulders shook like the lid on a pan of popcorn. “Right. Because being a bureaucrat is suuuuuuuuch a glamorous job. Oooh, check out all the pens I have in my desk that I keep losing because I never actually put them in a holder, so dreamy.”

Kokichi shook his head at himself, letting loose a few quiet giggles still. “If I remember right, though, having a special moment with fireworks is our special thing. Even if we’re probably only gonna see a lightshow during Hanami this year.”

Mentioning the holiday pinged it in Kokichi’s mind, and he looked over at their sleeping lover. Shuuichi wanted his freedom of movement, of course, but if he was finding it hard to move now… 

Kokichi’s gaze softened. “...I hope Shuu-chan will feel up to going to the festival… The main part of it is sitting down and enjoying the blooming trees and flowers anyway…”

“I hope he’s up to doing something for his freaking birthday.” Kaito said quietly, looking over to Shuuichi’s sleeping form, “He’s probably not going to want to do anything. Back at home, it was usually a victory just to get him to go to dinner and have a celebratory drink. I hope he’s not going to want to just sleep it away this year… well, I guess if he does, there’s always next year.” Kaito sighed.

Going over to sit by Kokichi, he paused, a little confused for a moment… before he grinned wide, remembering, “Oh, right. Watching the fireworks from the roof… my sneaky ‘Kichi trying to get me out of my shirt to throw it off… nothing to do with the fact that I couldn’t get my shirt off around that arm holster.” Kaito rolled his eyes at himself. Man he had spent a long time in a cast. It was easy to forget, but he had spent literal months in it. 

“I really liked that night… if I’m totally honest? I think that might be one of my fondest ‘intimate’ memories. Like… period.” Kaito gave Kokichi a warm look, before leaning forward, reaching towards Kokichi’s chin and angling him into a kiss. Kissing him gently, once, twice, “...you were so just… god, you were beautiful. You’re always beautiful, but especially that night… mind you, I think if I remember right, I was also incredibly high during all that.” Kaito recalled, blinking a bit, before shrugging, kissing Kokichi again, “But I still think it was a great night regardless.”

That was right… Both Shuuichi’s and Maki’s birthdays were during the spring, though Kokichi still had no idea what the actual days were… He should find that out. Even if Shuuichi didn’t want to do anything for it, Kokichi still wanted to get something for him and set up a dinner menu...nice pasta with good quality olive oil for sure. A bit...plain for most folks in the castle, but he could probably convince someone in the kitchen to make up a pot. Or have it be a...choose your own toppings sort of night…

...he had no way to know if Maki was going to be back for her birthday. Somehow...Kokichi doubted it. But he would still get her something. Show her that they’d all been thinking about her in the months she’d been gone. 

Kokichi reached up and cupped Kaito’s cheek, scooting into the absolute corner of the chair to give Kaito room to sit. Kissing gently...lovingly. And while Kokichi had been unsure at the time if what he felt was love...he’d still been so fond of his husband. 

He sighed, closing his eyes for a moment, though there was still a smile on his face. “I really enjoyed that night. But I’ve always been really guilty for it… I know I kept thinking through that week that if we’d just gone back to bed, you wouldn’t have gotten so sick. It was horrible, watching you be in so much pain, and knowing there was nothing I could do about it…”

“Ugh, right. Almost forgot about that too. Those migraine the next three days were… rough.” Kaito grimaced, though he continued to idly kiss Kokichi’s cheek, kissing up to his ear… “Ha. Mine.” Kaito quietly cheered, as he put his arms around Kokichi’s legs and around his back, doing his best to not jostle Kokichi’s mug of tea as he lifted him onto his lap, grinning like a dog who had caught a bone, before celebrating by kissing Kokichi some more. “But honestly, I doubt there was anything we could do to fix that before it happened. Sexy times probably put a little bit of pressure on my head, sure, but, like… so did crashing that horse. Like, if we were going to blame anything for me being knocked out for three days? We can probably blame the concussion I got going head over ass off a horse.”

Kokichi huffed in amusement as Kaito scooped him up into his lap, but...it really was an upgrade. Now Kokichi could be all cozy from his husband’s body heat while listening to the rain and his heartbeat as he sipped his tea. Absolute decadence. 

“I mean...yes. That was literally how you got all those injuries...but I still felt bad for exacerbating it.” With a sigh, Kokichi tipped his head up to kiss Kaito’s cheek. “But you came out of it alright so...it’s in the past. And I’ll be really happy if you never get a concussion and break your arm again. We’re gonna be over our heads trying to keep Miya out of trouble anyway…”

(Though, at least they wouldn’t have to worry about serious injuries. It was no reason to not keep her safe, since pain was still pain, but...it was a load off, to not have to worry about worst case scenarios.)

...Kokichi frowned softly. “...this might seem like a...like it’s coming from nowhere but… Do you ever get thoughts that...like, they still feel like your own. But that feel like they’re totally random? Like stuff you would think in a certain scenario, but you don’t know the context for them?”

“...Mmmm…” Kaito frowned, “Um… I’ve had lots of thoughts over my life that feel pretty random and out of my control, but I’d argue they didn’t feel like mine, no. More like I’m talking to myself in a funny voice… so… no, I can’t really say so. Everything alright babe? You’ve been feeling confused lately?

...he didn’t want people to think he was crazy… And while the thoughts were...kind of weird...they weren’t pushing him to do weird things, or really...disturbed him. Like he said, they still felt like his own thoughts. Just...contextless. 

There was an insecure look in Kokichi’s eyes, some obvious trepidation. But he still spoke. “...sort of? Not like a general sort of confusion, though. It just...I guess for...the past week or two? Sometimes I’ll just...have a thought that doesn’t make much sense to me. Like it’s coming from a place of additional information, but...I don’t know what that information is, and I don’t understand the leap to the observation. It’s nothing scary, really. Just kind of...weird.”

“That does sound kind of weird.” Kaito agreed easily, placing a gentle kiss on Kokichi’s temple, before letting his husband relax against him, Kaito hugging him against his chest as he thought about it. “...maybe it’s… well, honestly, maybe it’s just because you’ve been tired for so long. Maybe the thoughts made sense, but you’re just losing the thread of them by the time you’re done thinking it. Tiredness makes ya loopy, after all… or…”

Kaito leaned his head slightly against Kokichi’s for a moment, just long enough to express affection, as he said, “... well, with the baby coming up, and our lives not being go, go, go anymore, maybe you’re starting to like… feel some of the after effects of the stress of the last few months? Last ten months. Last year, really. Like, after a year like this? I think if the only side effect you’re showing is rambling thoughts sometimes, then we probably got off lucky.” Kaito mused, something sad and tired in his gaze… before asking, “Do you want to talk to Seiko about it?”

Kaito wasn’t that kind of person, especially with his own history, but...it still relieved Kokichi to hear that his husband didn’t think he was...losing his mind or something. There was only reassurance, no tension in Kaito’s body to suggest that he thought what Kokichi had admitted was off-putting. ...what did he do to deserve this man…

“...maybe.” They were both plausible enough theories. Kokichi sighed, resting his head against Kaito’s chest. “...I think I’d probably get more answers from my therapist, but...I’ll talk to them both. I still check in with Seiko once a week, so...hopefully she’ll have a little time to chat. If it’s stress, then it might do me good to check that my body’s doing alright from it.”

“...it’s really been a hell of a year, huh.”

“It’s been a hell of a year.” Kaito laughed, though again, there was something tired to it. 

“I mean… I’m glad for… for most of it.” Kaito mused, “I know that’s wrong. But I am. The good and bad stuff… and as bad as the bad stuff got, it really could have been so much worse… we had so many worst case scenarios we were mentally preparing for. We had no idea what you would be like… you could have been a nightmare. I was so, just… ready for that…”

“And instead I got an absolute sweetheart who loves my friends and loves Shuchi and is giving me a baby and makes loud, wonderful squeaking noises when I press down on his prostate.” Kaito grinned, kissing the top of Kokichi’s head again, full of affection. “How lucky did I get. I’m so lucky...”

“Kai-chan!” Okay, most of that was really sweet but-! Really?! That’s what Kaito chose to comment on?!

Groaning, Kokichi covered his face which had gone a deep pink, and he butted Kaito’s chest a bit in embarrassed protest. “Man...I really must be crazy ‘cause I consider myself lucky for even that… There’s not a day that goes by that I’m not thankful for you being in my life. You, Shuu-chan, Maki-chan, Tim...and soon Miyako. My life is undeniably better and fuller, even with commentary about how I am in bed.”

Kokichi butted his husband’s chest one more time for good measure before sighing, placing a kiss on his chest in, while exasperated, still entirely loving affection. “I think...I was only able to make it through the bad stuff because of how good the good stuff is. You make the bad stuff a lot easier to get through.”

“Who else was going to tell you? You weren’t going to tell you. I can imagine you just got your business done and never thought about or admired your cute little sounds at all. Tragic… a total waste.” Kaito sighed, shaking his head a little… before he said, entirely skipping that incredibly nice thing Kokichi said, “Actually, if we can circle back to fetishes? I’d love to watch you masturbate once. Like… just to see what it looks like. It’d be daydream material forever.” Kaito whispered, sounding awed.

Kokichi rolled his eyes and sighed again, but he scootched down and sipped at his tea, his head resting against the bottom of Kaito’s chest now. Because Kokichi wasn’t sure he could say this while looking at his husband’s face. “...it’s on the table. Not right now, but...some time. Sure.”

“Though...I have been pretty spoiled with a husband that loves to have sex with me. I haven’t masturbated in a while… Dunno if there’d be much of a show or anything. And, if I got myself off, that means that you can’t touch me, you know? Wouldn’t be the same thing.”

“To watch you desperately get through your own embarrassment? I can control myself.” Kaito said, entirely serious, though his eyes were a little far away, in daydream mode, “One night of self control in exchange for a lifetime of seeing you be flustered and aroused and adorable… absolutely worth it.”

Another sigh, much deeper this time, as Kokichi shook his head against Kaito’s pecs. “You’re a real perv sometimes, you know? I’m almost tempted to do it all stone-faced just to spite ya...though, that really is more of a Shuu-chan move. I’m happy that I can feed Kai-chan’s imagination, though...I know you really don’t need my help for that.”

...maybe he could pull his ‘scary face’ that he did at the beach house. It might be fun to see Kaito’s reaction, if nothing else. Though...Kokichi didn’t want to accidentally spark a ‘Kokichi-based scary face’ kink. It would be too hard to pull off if he was genuinely enjoying himself. 

Kaito chuckled at that, giving Kokichi another tight hug as he said, “I’m a real perv all the time. And you absolutely bring out the worst in me. I can’t help it. You’re so damn tempting, all the time. Beautiful, sexy, just, unbelievably good in the sheets… and also just a lot of fun to hang around. Interesting to talk to. Really, honestly, almost obnoxiously sweet…” Kaito sighed, “It’s honestly unfair, how I got my hands on you. I should have been forced to fight the world, for someone like you. Should have been beating other suitors off you with a stick, to get my shot. Aiichi has no fucking idea what he did, the atrocity of keeping you away from the dates and wooing you should have been showered in before I ever came along.”

Kokichi blushed, extremely flattered, though this sort of flattery didn’t reduce him to goo. “I really think you’re overestimating that… Even with not being able to reveal myself on my mind, I wasn’t that great of a flirt, and...honestly, I think I’d always be kind of suspicious about people courting me as ‘the prince’.”

Wrinkling his nose, Kokichi slung an arm around Kaito’s waist, keeping his mug upright and cradled against his chest. “Sure, there’s a lot of consideration that goes into whoever I’d marry, and just because the person I had to marry had to be special doesn’t mean I couldn’t casually date around, but… I dunno. People don’t really assume that the folks you’re going steady with aren’t gonna be around forever. And being my partner would...kinda be a fast way to get clout and respect. I think I’d have too hard of a time wondering if my partner just wanted to use me for that…”

“...sure didn’t help me understand what it means to be in a relationship, but I can definitely live with Kai-chan being my first. Talk about hitting a gold mine.”

“Hell yeah you did. If I have any super power in the world, it’s I know how to help a guy relax during his off hours.” Kaito grinned, giving Kokichi a wink and, for his own indulgence, another kiss, this time against the top of his forehead. “I put in the work.”

Though, as he was done bragging, he sighed a little, leaning back in the chair as he said, “Though, the fact that you’re worried about being used or taken advantage of, still… I’m not going to tell you that doesn’t happen. It happens all the time, for reasons that can be baffling sometimes. People finding reasons to take advantage of you that you’ve never even dreamt of, till you have the shock of hearing it come out of their mouths… but… learning to tell the difference between people who want to use you and people who like you is one of the reasons why you date. It’s a skill you learn, just like anything else. And learning to socialize… I don’t know. I’m biased, of course. I think everyone wants to put an extra sort of value at any skill or technique they think they’re personally good at… and, I will still argue, for most of my life I was good at it… maybe…”

Kaito looked suddenly a little uncertain at that. Dicea, all in all, having been a … hell of a blow to his self esteem, when it came to socializing… before he just sighed, “I think I was good at it. And I think, genuinely, anyone can be good at it, so long as they’re willing to be bad at it, for awhile… ya know? So… I don’t know. I wish you had gotten more chances to be bad at it, I guess. Cause people missed out, when it came to you. You’d have been worth the ‘awkward’ phase.” Kaito chuckled.

Kokichi’s gaze softened, considering Kaito’s words. “For what it’s worth, I still think you’re good at it. There’ve been some humps, sure, but...I mean, when you’re comfortable or excited about something… Perfect strangers flock to you like moths to flame, and in, like, twenty minutes it looks like you’re all friendly and having a good time. Even with our cultures being so different...when it comes to fun, everyday interactions, Kai-chan’s still king.”

“And… Yeah.” Kokichi sighed. He did wish he’d had more chances to be bad with interactions. More chances for interactions in general, in just...everyday situations, and not just the high stress ones. “But I think I’m doing alright with the awkward phases now… I mean, I got a little too drunk the first time we met Amber, Stacy, and Temp. I met Kerry while I was crying in a bathroom, and apparently he had no idea I was the heir until yesterday. We’re not, like, close friends or anything, but I met that scientist, Gonta, because he and his friend had to help me and Shuu-chan out when I almost passed out in the sauna… I don’t exactly have the best impressions...but I appreciate people still giving me a chance after them.”

“I still can’t believe I missed out on a sauna date.” Kaito grumbled, looking genuinely put out, “I mean… damn. Who’s idea was it?? Who was wooing who? You’re both so damn shy and smart, who the fuck between you was like ‘lets get down and dirty in this public sweat room, us two people who are extremely fragile in heat right now’? There’s no way I could have seduced either of you into that, who managed it??”

Kokichi rolled his eyes good-naturedly and placed a few placating kisses on Kaito’s chest, a little mirth in his eyes from seeing Kaito’s FOMO. “We were cold, and honestly I think the plan was just to come back up to our room and take a bath...but I remembered the saunas and, yanno, I kinda wanted to go, and it was just nice that Shuu-chan’s a fan too.”

“We were hanging out, getting comfy...and one thing just kinda led to another.” As plainly as he said it, Kokichi still blushed a little at the memory, his lips turning up into a sweet, pleased smile. “I think we were both kind of feeling like doing a little more than kissing...and...I told him if he was up for it, I was. And he was. So we did. And Shuu-chan got all sneaky on me and...I got a little overexcited,” the small prince laughed. 

“It’s not quite cold enough anymore for me to think about the saunas much...but if it gets that way, it might be a nice time, and who knows? Maybe Kai-chan will get his sauna date too.”

“God that sounds amazing.” Kaito lamented, only a bit placated by chest kisses. Chest kisses did feel nice, admittedly. “I guess that’s one thing to look forward too, next winter… though, summer. Summer is where I will find my vague body of water. Winter cockblocked me pretty hard, in that regard, and, like, Maki in the hot springs made that a no-go… but I’ve got months and months of warm weather now. I will find it.” Kaito vowed, a determined sparkle in his eye as he said, “Vague body of water.”

“I dunno how far we’d wanna travel with a newborn,” Kokichi hummed, though it was more musing than shutting down the idea entirely. “Though, I thought you wanted to teach me how to swim this summer? There’s no way any of the ponds in town are the vague body of water, but they would be good to swim in. I’ve never even really gone to ‘em to dip my legs in--usually I just find some empty room on the first floor to melt in when the heatwaves come. Just...surrounding myself with pitchers of ice water. Lying on the floor. Not even a single thought in my mind of trying to face the sun, uh-uh.”

After a moment of thought--and dread for the heatwaves--Kokichi hummed again. “...it gets to be about eighty at the worst of it, by the way. So I dunno if you’d have that many issues-”

“Pffffff, what?” Kaito said suddenly, eyes wide, staring at Kokichi with a clearly disbelieving half smile, “Ha ha… very funny.” 

Kokichi looked up at Kaito, dead serious and not amused in the slightest. “I know it gets hotter in Luminary, you don’t have to...like, brag about how ungodly the heat is. But eighty is…”

Kokichi groaned, unable to look anything but miserable as he thought about the heatwaves. “I feel like I’m dying… I don’t understand how anyone would wanna be outside in that kind of weather, though I know I’m the minority there… Everyone’s hot, but plenty of people head over to the ponds or bum out in the shade with, like, popsicles…”

“But with the humidity and all…” He looked up with a curious gaze. “How hot does it actually get in Luminary? Like...ninety-five?”

“During the summer, yeah.” Kaito agreed easily, still marveling that summers here were going to be like late springs and early falls… it sounded relaxing, honestly. “It never gets any lower than ninety for… well, honestly, four, five months there. Though, ngh, the very center of summer? ...I guess if heat is a real issue for you, babe, we should only go to Luminary during the winter.” Kaito realized, frowning a little, “I’ll tell Marigold. No doubt she’s already planning for the ceremony in a few years, so she’ll need to know it has to be during winter… I think our heatwaves could actually kill you. Like, physically. We go over a hundred all the time.”

Kokichi’s eyes widened in disbelief, before a slightly suspicious look came over his face. “...no. There’s no way there’s a...metropolitan, settled area that people stay in where it gets over triple digits… That kind of temperature is just for like...Death Valley Desert, kinds of areas.”

The suspicious look only grew. “How...how are people not just… There’s no way!”

“You built your city where it is regularly buried under twenty feet of snow!” Kaito counter-argued, “How did you guys survive your first winter?”

“It’s a lot easier to keep yourself warm than it is to cool down! And if you make structures in the snow, it insulates itself! It’s a perfectly cogent way to hunker down for the cold months, and the rest of our year is perfect for anything else you might need! It might stay snowy for four months, but it’s only bad for a week or two--not unlivable for four or five months!” Kokichi groaned, pressing his face into Kaito’s pecs. “Over ninety...that’s sooo hot hun!”

Kaito chuckled, gently patting Kokichi’s back as he said, “To be fair, it’s hot for us too. Even if you’re really tan, it’s still easy to burn if you don’t watch how long you’re out in the sun for, and we have all sorts of lotions and clothes and such to help. We have these things called parasols. Are you familiar with those? I don’t think I’ve seen one here yet. They’re basically umbrellas, but specifically for the sun. You see people out with them all the time in the worst of the heat, smelling of sun-tan lotion, some people wearing these real thin shawls to protect their skin from the sun even more, others basically naked. Myself and Maki are the naked types, while Shuuichi covers himself. And during the over hundreds, you don’t really leave your homes unless you have to.”

“And everything bakes. It’s honestly why our crop yields fail so often. They’ll be fine so long as we get enough rain, and we get tons of rain, thankfully. Random, sudden thunderstorms. Sometimes without a cloud in the sky, it’s just suddenly raining for ten minute intervals in the middle of the day, and then everything’s immediately clear again, constantly… but if we go through dry spells even for just a few weeks? Everything starts to die. Burning in the soil.” Kaito mused, suddenly feeling a little nostalgic for home as he continued, “And man, you have to be careful what you touch. We try not to make anything with metal, anything that’s meant to be out in the open anyway, because even just the stone can seriously burn you. Unless your feet already are covered in calluses, you can’t step out onto stone, not unless you see sand or dirt on it. A lot of the paths around our streets are specifically dirt paths because of that. It’s just cooler. And, heh… I made the mistake of leaving my sword out during some spars once? I was in between two fights, just forgot to put it in my sheath, left the damn thing laid out in the sun… the hilt itself was fine, covered in leather straps, but my hand brushed against the steel of the barrier… well, here.” Kaito brought his right hand up for Kokichi’s inspection, showing a particularly ragged line that went from the top bottom of his thumb and curved up towards his index, the mark faded but still clearly there as he said, “Burnt the shit out of my hand. My instructor still made me fucking spar with it too. Said I should have been wearing gloves either way… he was right, but… still. Damn.”

Kokichi still shook his head a bit, just...amazed at the heat Luminaries regularly put up with. Sure, people adapted to the heat in Dicea, but the lengths Kaito described… “Parasols sound kinda cool, actually… You’re right, we don’t have them here, but maybe that’ll be a trend that comes over. I could see people getting really into sun umbrellas--a lot of people do with rain ones too.”

While he was calming, Kokichi frowned slightly, hearing about one of...likely, the most contributing factor to Luminary’s food shortage issues. Sure, mismanagement was a big one, but...if there still wasn’t enough food to go around… Surely they had tried different ways of drawing out groundwater and using different forms of irrigation but...if the soil was baking, that counted those out, most likely… Surely there was some way to figure out a way to tide over crops during dry spells, though...maybe just some technology they hadn’t figured out yet…

Luminary sure had an incentive to figure it out. A blisteringly hot desert country--though Kokichi was aware of the few patches of wetlands and plains, but not what they actually looked like--keeping metals out of everyday structures… A culture around dressing light or in specific coverings…

Kokichi traced the scar on Kaito’s hand, leaning over to place a gentle kiss on it. “...even if I don’t think I’d do well in the majority of the weather...I really wanna see Luminary. Your home. See it as a place that’s new, see it as you do, as the home you love… Every time you talk about it, I feel like I can almost see it, even if I’ve never even seen a picture of Luminary. But...what I imagine looks so beautiful…”

“I imagine taking you there all the time… actually gave myself a fit once, doing that.” Kaito laughed, though there was something mildly embarrassed in the laughter, “It was a super self indulgent daydream… you in, like, sandals and shorts and these light, airy shirts that layer around the neck… probably early spring, cause you had these little metal and gold ankle and wrist bracelets… and I just took you around Luminary a bit. Showed you my school and…” Kaito grinned, blushing, “The throne room at the castle… anyway, I’d love to show you Luminary someday…”

Thinking about it, Kaito said, “I think one of the most visually glaring differences, besides, like, the nature stuff-- nothing is as blue and green as it here, living in Dicea is like stepping into someone’s backyard manor garden and just never stepping out again-- is our use of cloth and tapestries? You just just don’t do that here. Decorate your buildings with cloth, I mean. At home, we have these beautiful, long tapestries just… everywhere. All a little weather worn, of course, but we use them for signs, for decorations, as a way to leave the doors and windows open without necessarily opening up buildings. They’re really intricate, all these little details… there’s no such thing as going overboard on a tapestry. You own a simple barber shop at the end of one of the poorer districts? Cracked windows and tiles falling off the roof? Doesn’t matter, the tapestry advertising your barber shop is beautiful… full of color and patterns, everything around it tan and worn down, the color of the paint we put on our buildings washing out in the heat over time… but the cloth of the tapestries last a long time, and are simpler to change out and replace.”

“One of those things I didn’t realize would change, when I moved. I barely noticed the tapestry’s, growing up around them. But they really were one of the more beautiful things about our streets, looking back at it.”

Kokichi giggled softly but...there was something a little stiff in the corners of his lips. As if he was willing himself to keep smiling and not turn the expression into anything else. Because, if he allowed it too, then it would likely morph into worry because…

...Kokichi remembered that. Like a dream. Kaito leading him through the streets of Luminary, ogling Kokichi’s nearly bare legs before turning his gaze to familiar buildings, showing Kokichi it all and sharing stories…

(...this was different from just being tired and losing track of his thoughts. But Kokichi wouldn’t tell Kaito. And he wouldn’t write this down for Dr. Mariah either.)

Closing his eyes and...trying not to dwell on that, Kokichi tried to let Kaito’s words whirl him away. And...while he had trouble imagining cracked windows (why wouldn’t they just be replaced?), the images that he could bring up…

“Beautiful…” Kokichi murmured. “In my head...it looks amazing. Looking at all the art, proud and setting everyone apart… On a slightly windy day, looking out over the city and watching them all wave and ripple… I feel like you guys would be so embarrassed, watching me gape and coo over everything. I’m gonna wanna look at everything.”

“I don’t think I’d be embarrassed.” Kaito grinned, despite the fact that he had just admitted even imagining showing Kokichi his home had thoroughly embarrassed him, “I’d love it. Especially because it means I’d finally get to take you out of the country like I promised. I still have to show you everything.” Kaito said softly, lightly rubbing Kokichi up and down his arm, staring at the window as it was pelted with the rain, it still coming down heavy, “I promised you I would… I still mean to do it.”

Kokichi listened to the rain, felt the feeling of Kaito holding him close. He remembered that night vividly, even though it was months and months ago now. Kaito promising to show him the world, to open his cage...to be together as people, more than the ideas people had for them. 

It had meant everything to Kokichi then, and...it still meant a whole hell of a lot now. Just that Kaito had shown him more of a world without them having to go anywhere first. 

“...thank you, Kai-chan. I love you a lot…” Kokichi smiled, eyes closed contently as he nosed against his husband’s pecs. “...I’m really happy we get to spend the rest of our lives together. I know I’ve said it before, but...of every future, right now, this is my favorite.”

-

“Caaaaan Iiiiii geeeeeet aaaaaaaaaa-” Amber’s eyes scanned the menu, drawling every word, “Venti caramel ribbon crunch frappuccino wiiiiiiiiith three shots, please and thank youuuuuuu~.”

“Three shots?” Amber raised an eyebrow, looking over at Stacy as she nursed her own chai tea with a splash of mint, “You alright, girl?”

“Giiiiirl, if you weren’t here, to like, judge me? I’d have asked for legit, liiiike, five shots. My thesis got me beat. I’m dying, girl.”

Around them, the shopping mall plaza hummed along in all of its consumery glory, the three stopped in front of a drinks shop.

“It sounds like you’ve been working non-stop on it,” Kokichi hummed, partly in observation and partly in concern as he sipped at his own sugary coffee blend--though, his version was decaf. He’d told Seiko about some mild vertigo he’d been having, and along with a few stretches and supplements, she’d recommended staying away from extra caffeine for a bit. “I’m glad you’re taking breaks, but...really. It’s just been your life lately, huh?”

Giving Stacy a small smile, Kokichi laughed gently. “I hope going through clothing stores isn’t gonna aggravate your thesis-brain. Though, I do always appreciate your insight on fashion.”

“Boy, please, taking some downtime with my besties is like cooling water to a dying man. I neeeed it.” Stacy whined, though she flashed a smile to the barista who passed her the drink she had ordered, “Thanks! ‘Sides, I still love all of-” she gestured towards the clothing stories around them, sighing gratefully as she sipped at her coffee, “-this. If getting all draped out in education ruined drapery for me, I’d have been burnt out and all sad and stuff, liiiiike, back when I got my baccalaureate, ya knooooow?”

“You were all sad and stuff back then.” Amber recalled.

Stacy shrugged, “Yeah, but that was chemical. I’m all good now. And, like, man, I only wish I had access to literature on Luminary and Novoselic before I did my thesis. I’m still sooooo mad about that, like, if I hadn’t started the early drafts two years ago? If I had even just waited a year, I wouldn’t have had to rely on off continent research for my theories into how culture impacts consumer perception of value. Liiiike, ya know? That would have been so much more interesting, to explore how differently direct neighbors treat textiles like satin and metals like gold, instead of two countries on opposite sides of the ocean.”

“It was still cool you got to take that trip to Kimigashine and Rabbit Doubto.” Amber pointed out, “Once in a lifetime experience.”

“Novis too.” Stacy pointed out, nodding, before smirking, “Mind you, I uh… didn’t get a lot of ‘research’ done in Novis. Novis was a time.”

Kokichi giggled softly. He’d been wide eyed and amazed when he’d learned that Stacy had taken trips off the continent for her doctoral research, and even now it was still incredibly impressive to him. “I always find it funny how people always talk about Novis like it’s a...party, vacation place. Since its priory is one of the biggest forces in the country? Though, from what I’ve heard, their religion isn’t very austere, so maybe that meshes better than I think.”

Sighing, Kokichi shook his head. “I know this is to get away from research, but Stacchan, I’m gonna read the shit out of your thesis when you publish it. It’s...a little late, but I wish I’d even been thinking of the concept of differing cultural values on objects when I got married…”

“But!” he declared, perking up more. “I know at least Dicean markets! And I’ve gotta find something really special for Shuu-chan and Maki-chan’s birthdays, even if I don’t know when they are ‘cause Shuu-chan’s a party pooper and won’t tell me.”

“Oh my gaaaaawwd, boy, they are just… so pious over in Novis.” Stacy giggled, looking fond at the memory, “Like, imagine how much fun Atuans could have been? Novis is. You and your boy Kaito need to take a vacay there, someday, I feel like you’d get a kick out of it. Maaaaaybe not so much Shuuichi… well, no, there’s nice places to just chill if you’re the chilling type.” She mused, before giggling again, another small shrug as she said, “Not places I was hanging out, but still.”

“Speaking of ‘oh my gawd’ moments, baby, it’s probably, liiiike, for the best you didn’t know how Luminary valued objects. Like, I think, no kidding? Your wedding rings would have put us into national debt.” Amber said, hushing her voice, looking with all the urgency of someone about to spread some serious tea as she said to them, “Kai-guy stopped by, like, two, maybe three weeks ago? Two and a half, whatevs. He wanted to talk to me about making some jewelry for the Queen of Luminary? Apparently he was waiting because he was trying to save up some money to do the commission, and he was saying, ‘oh, I’m not really close to ready yet, but can I get the estimate for this, this, and that’, and I’m like…. Like, cause a bitch can be curious, right? I’m like, what do you expect it’s gonna cost?”

She put her hand to her chest, still just, blown away as she said, “You guuuuuys, I swear, I died on the spot. Died, ghosted around a bit, came back to life. Legit, I almost fainted. He suggested a number that would easily cover the cost of my entire business for a year, and had the audacity to look guilty, like he was trying to low ball me. They are not fucking around in Luminary when it comes to high end custom made jewlery. It was insane the number he suggested.”

“Did he end up commissioning from you?” Stacy asked.

“When I told him the real price, he actually looked a little disappointed? Said he needed to talk to someone about it and he’d come back. Hasn’t been back to ask about it yet.” Amber shrugged.

“Weird. Luminaries are weird.” Stacy scoffed, before looking at Kokichi, “No offense to your Luminaries, Kokichi. Shuuichi won’t tell you his birthday?”

Kokichi snorted softly. He knew their god, Iony, was worshipped through acts of celebration and, er, inebriation--Novis wine was a hiiiiiigh delicacy, he’d learned--but...well, he shouldn’t really assume anything until he learned about it. Novis had always seemed like a good vacation destination. 

Looking over in slight surprise as Amber chimed in with her own information on Luminous customs, Kokichi looked at his wedding ring in wonder. It was just gold and ivory… A bit overly fancy, sure, but there wasn’t that much of it, and...well, he had always been a little sore over how valuable they were. Other than just being one color each of both countries’ colors, his father had explained that the wealth was an important commitment to the peace. 

...apparently, it was probably the cheapest thing the Luminaries would tolerate as not being insulting. 

Kokichi put a hand over his heart, letting out a whoosh of air as he looked almost a little pained at the price Kaito had expected for his commission. “I know I still don’t even fully understand it, but Shuu-chan explained to me once about how much wealth Kai-chan’s family has and...urg. I can barely even conceptualize it.”

Shaking his head a little to recover from the money bomb--and admitting that, yes, Luminaries were weird--Kokichi sighed. “Noooooo. He says it’s not a big deal, and I respect that! But I still wanna set up dinner that night and get him a gift. Kai-chan said that he never wants a party, but it can still be a special day without that. And...they don’t really talk about Maki-chan at all like that these days…”

Kokichi pressed his lips together, looking to the side uncomfortably. “...I feel...like I’m gonna upset them, or something, if I ask when her birthday is.”

“Awwww. Maki’s, like, they’re sister from another mister, right?” Stacy asked, giving Kokichi a sympathetic look, “They must be the Big Sad, to be missing her birthday.”

“I mean, I get that, but isn’t she off on vacay? I can get being lonely and all that shit, but not talking about her? Seems like an overreaction, if I’m totes honest.” Amber shrugged.

“Kokichi, aren’t you, like, Keeper of the Records? Like, the Grand Pupa of Paperwork? Can’t you just read Shuuichi’s b-day in his records or whatever?” Stacy asked, sipping at her coffee, her eyes window shopping with glee. She loved spring-wear. So colorful!

Kokichi sighed softly again. He loved Amber and Stacy but...he couldn’t tell anyone about what Maki was doing. Not because he thought that they might somehow leak it to Byakuya but...discretion was important. And he’d promised her. 

“Maybe… But they had a...pretty much a huge fight right before she left. And then considering that Tim, her son, is staying with Kai-chan, and all the Luminary students are gonna be arriving while she’s on vacation, even if she saw them when the travel exchange happened...they’re both still sore about that. I know it’ll get better when she comes back, though.”

Because when Maki returned...it would mean that she’d made it back. And at the end of the day...he knew that’s what Shuuichi and Kaito wanted most. (Though, with Byakuya still alive too, for Kaito.)

Pouting, Kokichi whined a bit. “I mean...I could. And at this point, I probably will. But I’ve always liked learning from conversation, or from people themselves, about their birthdays. Usually it tells a lot about how they feel about it, and what they might want. The last few gifts I’ve gotten Shuu-chan have been nice pens, which I know he likes, but...I wanna do something different this time! But there’s so much I can just see him...not really caring about at all. He’s a guy of simple pleasures.” 

“He sounds like the kind of guy who’d probs be, liiiiike, aaaaa-okay with nice pens every special event for the rest of his life… but! In a lot of ways, finding something that can impress guys like him can be even more rewarding than, like, those guys who know what special, niche thing they’d most like for themselves, ya know?” Stacy observed, before gesturing to them, “Oh, oh, this shop. I heard they got a new line of silk from Novoselic that’s heaven on your skin, like, and I don’t know if I believe em, mulberry quality shit. Again! I don’t believe them, I think it’s just a rumor, but if it’s true, I’d die.”

Amber looked at the store in question and raised an eyebrow. “Stacy… we can’t make Kokichi stand around in a store like this.”

“Whaaaaa, why nooooot?” Stacy asked, gesturing to the sexy lady lingerie store as she whined, “Milbury silk liiiingerieeeeeee, Ammmmberrrrrrrr.”

Amber rolled her eyes, “Staaaaaaacyyyyy, there’s nothing in there fooooor hiiiiiiiim.”

Kokichi nodded, Stacy getting the beat on his gift debacle right on. He just...wanted the day to be special. If he could, he’d want Shuuichi feeling special everyday, but...if he did end up having to go on bedrest soon, and would be on it through his birthday… Kokichi wanted Shuuichi’s birthday to be a day where he felt happy and comfortable and loved, even if everything they did was in their room. 

(That was...everything Kokichi hoped for when he was in that position.)

Giving the lingerie store a dry look, Kokichi sighed deeply. “Too bad it’s not Kai-chan’s birthday--then this would actually work for me.” Rolling his eyes, he gave Amber a grin. “Am-chan, I don’t mind. Just ‘cause I’m not really interested doesn’t mean I’m gonna burst into flame standing among panties and bras. You two have fun! I’ll be there listening and nodding though I don’t know anything.”

Amber shrugged, before saying, “If you say so. I just want to say, as your bestie-prime? I tried to save you.”

“Pfff, well, we’ll see who’s bestie-prime when it is his husbands birthday, and he needs some top-tier lingerie advise to make him swoon.” Stacy coo’d, the three entering the shop and Stacy immediately getting distracted by the display tables of colorful panties.

“What does Shuuichi like then? Other, then, like, mad-crazy pens?” Amber asked Kokichi, though her eyes also was glancing around the shop, looking in interest at some of the displays.

Kokichi looked around the shop as well, but it was with more of a dull interest, just looking around because there were things in front of him. “He likes coffee, but it’s not really like...he likes fancy roasts or anything. He just started drinking it because his mentor did, and he wanted to follow her. He’s said he’s gotten really into chai since he’s been branching out… He’s not supposed to have caffeine anyway, and it feels kinda mean to get him something he’ll have to wait until after Miya’s born to appreciate…”

“He likes sleek, dark clothes, but he’s not really into clothes overall… His hat is really special, but it’s specifically that hat so that’s not an option… Mm. He likes information, so I could get him a cool non-fiction book, but...it’s kinda hard to predict what’s gonna capture his interest. He kinda hops from thing to thing on his whims…”

Kokichi thought for a moment, looking with some amusement at a display full of thongs with specialty designs on the front. “...would it be too tacky to get him a collection of mystery stories? He’s a detective himself so...I dunno if it’d be amusing or just kind of annoying to him…”

“What about some sort of game?” Amber asked, looking at one particular thong that, in theory, covered something, “Like a scavenger hunt or something? Or some sort of mystery he’s gotta solve? Does he like doing the detective stuff? I mean, I’m kinda assuming he does, since he did a whole career in it and stuff. Maybe he’d get a kick doing something like that.”

Kokichi’s eyes widened, looking excited as he turned to his friend. “...oh my god, that’s… That’s amazing! Like...a bunch of riddles, leading him around, then I could...oh, I could ask Kai-chan, and I could set something up with our gifts and dinner and… Amber!! You’re a genius!”

Of course...there was the issue of if Shuuichi could get out of bed that day… But they could still have fun thinking over the riddles while they hung out in their room, and it would still be a nice time without the presentation. Now...he just had to set up a cool chain of riddles. 

...and maybe Kokichi would still get him some books. It would be nice to give him some stuff he could get into immediately. 

Amber grinned, endlessly pleased, “Yeah? Yeah! Hell yeah! Baby, you always know who to go to for your birthday present related needs! Amber’s got the haps!”

“OH MY GAAAAWD IT’S MULLLLBERRRRYY!!!!”

“Staccyyyyy, don’t yell in the store!” Amber yelled back… before saying, “Alright, I gotta go see if this silk is everything she says it is.”

Kokichi giggled, heading over after Amber to their other friend. 

…he would actually die if he got Maki lingerie. Even before she had a chance to kill him, and Maki wasn’t one to hesitate. 

...and he wasn’t going to look up her birthday. It was...exceedingly unlikely she was going to be back in time for it and...well. He didn’t want to make Shuuichi and Kaito sad, still trying to celebrate it. He would just...keep her in his thoughts, as he’d been doing since she left. And when she came back, she could tell him herself. 

But he still needed to think of a good gift.

The mulberry silk lingerie was, indeed, very nice… and very expensive. Stacy raved and gushed about it, getting three sets herself, but Amber eventually got herself just one set, and that was after some nudging and nagging from Stacy, insisting it was worth the price and Amber would hate it if she only got half a set and had to deal with regular underwear while wearing the good stuff on the other half of her body. 

“I bet you anything they got some boxers around here for you Kokichi… make your balls feel like they’re, like, floating in heaven.” Stacy said, looking around, just determined to find him some, though there weren’t any readily apparent.

Kokichi snorted softly, though the look on his face was fond and earnest. “Well, now that I’ve seen the label, I can keep an eye out when I’m goin’ underwear shopping. Even if it’s not sexy, I think my husband would get all flustered and scandalized if he saw I was wearing undies like that… I think that’s enough of an incentive, along with your recommendation of comfort, to splurge if I see ‘em.”

“Though...I am keepin’ more of an eye on my budget,” he softly mentioned. “We’re just about done with the nursery and...well. I’m being responsible.”

“Oh! Isn’t Temp’s interview for Bonus today? He’s, been, like, sooooo hyped up and freaked about it, I swear.” Stacy giggled, as they bagged up her items, the three heading out of the store and into the greater mall again as they once more headed out, “He brings it up every time we hang.”

“Better be careful, Stac. You’re gonna catch feelings for a single daddy if you keep messing around like this.” Amber cautioned her, giving her friend a Look, “That shit’ll get real complicated, real quick.”

“Pffff, I’m horny, not stupid. If I thought there was a chance in hell? Like, maaaaaybe. Temp’s got a lot going for him, if you know what I mean.” Stacy giggled, giving Amber a wink, before sighing, “But I don’t crush on people who aren’t looking twice at me because I’m not all pathetic and stuff, and trust me, Temp isn’t looking twice. He’s a nice guy and a good time, but he could not be less interested, and I ain’t about that chase life.”

Kokichi nodded, but paused and listened to Stacy talk about her...time, he supposed, with Temp. It was only a relationship in that they were friends that liked to have a good time, and nothing more complicated than that. And when Stacy said as much, he believed her, and for her sake he was glad. 

“He is really excited about being a dad, though.” He gave the girls a grin before looking back out into the district, wondering where to hit next. Getting Maki knives, while she’d probably like them, was...kind of boring. And there was a lot more to Maki than that. “He was so nervous when he asked me and Kai-chan about getting an interview… It didn’t leave the best impression on Kai-chan, unfortunately, but he’s still giving Temp a chance, and I have faith he’ll do a good interview.”

Laughing softly, he turned to the girls again. “I joked that we’re gonna be part of a dad squad, if he ends up adopting Bonus. And, I guess, eventually if not too. Buuuuut the guys and I have already talked about asking our family to give us date nights every now and then, so we can still go out and have fun sometimes.”

“I’m ready for this responsibility but...I mean, I like having fun with you guys too. I don’t want that to just...end.” Kokichi’s smile was a little softer, feeling thankful for his friendship with Amber and Stacy all of a sudden, though it wasn’t an uncommon feeling at all. “The kind of fun we have, I mean. I’d assume you’d still wanna hang even when I’m in dad-mode.”

“Are you kidding? You aren’t getting away from us that easy, baby. If a dozen different people all can’t babysit when it’s squad time? Well, guess what? Miyako’s joining the squad.” Amber said, not a shred of doubt in her voice as she said, “Gonna pump her out in her finest baby booties, get her nails all painted, do her hair. Get her ready for a night on the town… or a day in the plaza. Probably shouldn’t take a baby to any night clubs. But shopping and hangout days? Tsk, baby girl gonna window shop with the best of us.”

“Siiiiides, taking your kids with you shopping is supposed to be good for them, later in life. Apparently effectively handling your kids shopping meltdowns does wonders for their ability to handle loss and rejection later in life, according to one of my classmates thesis he’s working on, in how daily store modeling trends affects long term societal development? Emotionally, there’s not much difference for people experiencing the first time they’re denied a toy they want, and the first time they bomb a job interview. At the moment, it’s always one of the worst things that’s ever happened to them, and they gotta learn to cope, baby!” Stacy crowed.

“Awwwww, my mom’s got a sad story where apparently I was having a meltdown at the candy store, and mom just burst into tears with me.” Amber sighed, shaking her head, looking a tad guilty, “The candy people had to take her into the back to sort herself out and literally gave both of us lollipops. Good for them or not, it is not easy being the parent with the screaming, freaking out child.”

Turning to Kokichi, she reached out and patted his shoulder a bit, “If Miyako gets into tantrums around us, we got you, baby. We won’t leave ya to handle it alone, we’ll find some quiet corner and wait it out with ya. No one in the squad left behind.”

Again, Kokichi felt his heart warm as he looked over his friends in appreciation. They had met at a club, tipsy and looking for a fun night, and...Amber and Stacy, and Temp, to an extent, were extremely steadfast friends. Sometimes, it felt like they were just...this dose of normalcy when his life was feeling like a wobbling carousel of absurdity. And knowing that they were still going to be his friend whether he was dancing in a club or holding his daughter in a sling was...incredibly comforting. 

“I think Kai-chan’s got her outfits for the next three years already planned out, and it’s only not more ‘cause we don’t know how fast she’s gonna grow--she’s gonna be all matchy and cute no matter what!”

Giggling, Kokichi sighed a bit, giving Amber a soft look. “I am...not really looking forward to the tantrums, as ready as I am for ‘em. But...thanks. At the very least, I think you guys would help me not cry if she’s starting to fuss. But hopefully Miya would feel better with the attention of not just Daddy, but two of her aunties too.”

“Tch, you and Stacy can be the good ones that teach Miya to cope through things like ‘patience’ and ‘self-soothing’, this aunt is carrying around lollipops for Baby and Miya when they get all tired and pouty and sad.” Amber laughed, “I’m gonna be the aunt that spoils!”

“Is Kokichi still going to be Baby when a babies around?” Stacy asked, giving Amber a curious look.

“Of course he is! Look at him! There’s no other nickname for him! Those big eyes with those rosy cheeks! He’s Baby!” Amber insisted, though she paused looking at him, before saying, “Usually rosy cheeks. You’re looking a little pale today. Maybe get you some blush, brighten you up, but otherwise… everything okay, Baby? You good?”

Between Amber and Kaito--and despite her wanting to be well-rounded, Kokichi knew that he was going to be weak-willed when it came to his daughter--Miya was going to have more than enough people spoiling her...but that was kind of nice. Having a big family, plenty of people teaching her all sorts of things, getting every sort of interaction you could want for a small child…

And through it all, to Amber, Kokichi would always be Baby.

Kokichi chuckled softly before sighed. “I’m alright. I’ve been a little tired lately, but I’m checking in with my doctor regularly. For the special treatments I’m doing, that doctor says I’m...kind of in the hump before things start to look up? Apparently it’s a hell of a curve, though…”

With others, Kokichi wouldn’t have mentioned it, but...Amber and Stacy, while knowing about the rumors around him, had never seen Kokichi seriously ill. So even though he trusted his family not to treat him different...it was different with people who didn’t know. 

“It’s...kinda been like this for months…” he sighed, rubbing the back of his neck tiredly. “I know better than to just stop in the middle of a treatment but...I’ve been ready for a while for things to start looking up.”

“Ugh, feeling sick for ages suuuuucks.” Stacy groaned, giving Kokichi a sympathetic look, “For a little while there, a few years back? I was, like, on allll these different medications? And they kept changing them up, trying to find me some that doesn’t have, like, a crazy bunch of side effects? I felt nauseous regularly for, like, moooonths. I got real, reaaaaaaal close to just being like, no, fuck this, fuck that-” Stacy seemed to remember herself, looking around with a small blush to see if there was anyone around who might take offense, before changing it to, “-screw this, screw that, I don’t wanna doooo this anymore, let’s just sink into the sad.”

“And this is where you go buuuut.” Amber prompted.

“Buuuuut, it was worth it when it was all sorted out.” Stacy sighed, “Still sucked donkey balls, but medicine is more trial and error than I think anyone would like to admit. So long as she’s not bathing you in liiiiiike ‘healing oils’,” Stacy giggled, rolling her eyes, “It’ll probs be worth it, Kokichi. Hang in there, man, you got this~”

...he’d never really met anyone else who had chronic illness. And while that wasn’t exactly Stacy’s boat...for a moment, Kokichi felt a sort of kinship. And her experience did make him feel a little better about his own. 

Giggling softly, Kokichi rolled his eyes. “Some of the stuff she had me do is pretty weird, not gonna lie, but it’s nothing like that. I’ve already had my fill of miracle medicine. But...thanks, Stacchan. I’m not exactly, yanno, rearing to go...but I’m stickin’ with it. It’ll be really nice if I never have to cancel things en masse ‘cause I get really sick…”

“Well, it’s been a while since you had to do that, right? I mean, you being worn down is the worst I’ve personally seen you, and we’ve been hanging out for a bit now.” Amber mused, doing the mental math as she said, “....mmmmm...I guess it’s not been that long. We met at the end of fall, right? So maybe...four months, five? We should celebrate when we hit six months! Go to a spa! Oh my god!” 

Amber’s eyes suddenly looked dazzled as she said, “Spa day. We need to do a spa day, you guuuuuuys. The whole nine yards, vegetables on our eyes, weird smelling lotions, hot guys giving us back massages until we’re ready to decompress in a scented sauna… you guuuuuuuys, we haaaave toooooo!”

“I got sick around Unity,” Kokichi said softly, frowning a little, though the expression smoothed out as he remembered how that day was spent. “I was bedridden for a little bit there. But, thankfully, people opted to visit me instead. It wasn’t one of my worse bouts, but still kind of annoying.”

Looking over in intrigue, Kokichi hummed, smugly keeping to himself that he already had a hot guy that gave him back massages--Stacy and Amber liked chatting about Kokichi’s romantic life, but there was only so much relationship gloating he could do at a time. “That sounds pretty nice, if I’m honest. I’ve never been to a spa before… I like using the sauna in the castle, so if it’s all relaxing stuff like that, I’m totally down for that.”

He said eyed Amber, however, giving her a petulant look. “...but no makeovers. I get enough of that from my big sibling. I see tweezers go anywhere near my face and I’ll cry, I’m warning you.”

“Pffff, spoilsport. I hope you develop a unibrow as you get older, come begging to go to makeovers with me.” Amber said, sticking her tongue out at him, before saying, “Anyway, fiiiiiine, no makeovers. Just massages and lotions and various warm things.”

“And a salted meditation pool.” Stacy said, “You ever been to one of those? It’s like you’re weightless. It’s suuuuuper soothing. No one’s allowed to talk in them, so, liiiiike, you can close your eyes and feel like you’re floating in space.”

Kokichi stuck his tongue back out at Amber, though he hummed in interest at the meditation pools. “Really? When we went to the hot springs to the northeast, Maki-chan tried to teach me to float… Didn’t really work, though she said the sulphur in the water should’ve made it easier…”

“But just, like...being all warm and under the stars like that… I can definitely imagine what those pools are like. You’ve definitely convinced me there.” Kokichi felt his eyes sticking to a display just ahead of them, the clothes light and flowy and definitely along the lines of things he’d wear...but he wasn’t shopping for him, and Maki definitely wouldn’t wear anything like that, even in her old style.

“Yeah, you’re, like, a stick of a person, so I imagine floating isn’t much in your wheelhouse.” Amber teased, smirking down at Kokichi, though she saw his eyeline focus and, almost entirely on instinct, followed his gaze, “Babyyyyyy, do you want to stop? Take a look? Not gonna lie, that shirt looks like it was made with you in mind.”

“It might be. Kokichi’s a walking advertisement. It’d be smart for these shops to feature clothes he’d be drawn to, even if it just feels like a small chance it’d work.” Stacy mused, looking around, “Not sure if any of them are actually trying that, but if I was a shop owner? I’d keep it in mind.”

Kokichi sighed with a nod. Every time he took a bath he worked on it but...it wasn’t much good for practice, and even then he hadn’t gotten many results. 

Looking a bit bashful, Kokichi shook his head. “Nah, I’m good. I’m mainly just looking for a gift for Maki-chan now...don’t need anything for myself.” Much to, possibly, the disappointment of a few shop owners. He was some big advertising…

“Oh, speaking of that, though, when Kai-chan and I went dancing the other day? He tooootally hyped up your tanzanite pieces, Am-chan. During one of the trade dances, he even noticed that one of his partners had one of your pieces too!” Even as he grinned, Kokichi was soon put back into a musing mood. “...it’s so weird that...even, like, a year ago? Barely anyone even knew what I actually liked to wear… If anyone is trying to cater to my tastes, it’s some quick turnaround…”

“Oh, yeah? Maybe he’s the reason I suddenly got a ton of teenagers browsing my wares. Most teens never even come into my shop-- real jewelry is too pricy for their allowances, ya know? Not unless, liiiiiike, they’re the kind of kids getting their parents to buy them tiara’s they’re only getting to decorate their head mannequins on their bedroom desks.” Amber said, rolling her eyes a little. Even if she made her living on vanity projects like that, she also knew the other myriad of unfortunate personality traits that came with those types of kids, and she wasn’t above shaking her head at the parents that allowed it.

“But, the last two days? Suddenly I got, like, allllll types of kids coming in, buying tanzanite pieces. Which, great! Those kids have pieces that will accumulate in value over time, and also look damn fine, if I doooo say so myself,” Amber waved out her hair with a smirk and said, “And I do. Plus, when they’re older and looking for more pieces or pieces for special occasions? They’ll remember me and my shop. A nice little investment in my business’s future.”

“You really should think about raising the prices on your tanzanite collection, Amber. Like… for what they are? You’re selling them for nothing, girl…”

“Nah, I’d feel bad. I got them, for, like, literally nothing, every coin I’ve made on them has been a net gain. And, again, the advertising it’s done for my shop has been amazing.” Amber gushed, looking Kokichi up and down as she said, “I just gotta get some of it on you. Inspiration just hasn’t hit yet, for you… do you have any favorite jewelry styles? Necklaces, bracelets, headbands… chokers? Are you a choker guy, Baby? You don’t have any piercings… do you?” She asked, peering at him, “Do you have piercings in places I can’t see?”

“What does Maki like?” Stacy asked, looking around the mall, “Maybe we can help.”

Kokichi raised his eyebrows a little, pleasantly surprised and delighted for his friend. “Really? Kai-chan did mention he talked about your shop with a teenager too… Really can’t underestimate teenage gossip, huh. But...that’s awesome that they’re checking out your shop!”

Snorting, he rolled his eyes a bit. “Not a one. And...like, I know it’s your bane, but I really don’t wear that much jewelry… Usually just my wedding ring. I do wear clips in my hair time to time though… and I do think charm bracelets are pretty cool…”

Kokichi cut himself off and hummed, trying to say aloud the kinds of things he was looking for for Maki. “She’s really into nature. She’s kind of a force like it herself, and apparently her hikes are kinda notorious...but she really appreciates the little stuff about it too. She took me up into a tree once, wanting to share the view and just...everything. She picked out an owl across a whole clearing!”

“And sports. She never got the chance to go to any games here before she left, but just from us talking about maybe going to some she got all fired up. I really wanted to take her to a hockey game, but she left right at the start of winter…” It had been a whole season already… Really not that much time, in the whole scheme of things, but it still felt...too long. “Maki-chan kinda recently changed up her whole style, getting a haircut and redoing like...her entire wardrobe. I...think she kinda got all the sort of stuff she wanted from that though… She’d had a sort of...expectation about how she should look, her whole life, and changing it all was...a big deal for her. More than she let on, I think.”

Remembering a similar conversation, Kokichi’s cheeks went pink and he averted his eyes, sighing exasperatedly. “...and she’s about as gay as I am, while being bi, but the last thing I’d ever try to get Maki-chan is a girlfriend.”

“Could get her an escort.” Stacy smirked, “They’re pretty reasonably priced, and very pretty.”

“Stacy!” Amber said, looking genuinely scandalized, before raising her eyebrow at her, “Have you really?”

“I was the Big, Big Sad, for awhile.” Stacy sighed, “Not my proudest moment, but honestly, not as squeamish as you’d imagine. The escorts were nice! It was a good time. I wonder, looking back, if they were Atuans… you hear a lot lately, about Atuan escorts. I wonder if I’ve known Atuans this whole time and just didn’t realize it.” Stacy mused, looking intrigued by the idea. “Though, it’s not like whatever you decide to get her, you have to get it right away. She’s not coming back for a bit, right?”

Kokichi snorted, hard, more from his imminent Maki-based death from such an intimate gift than being scandalized by escorts in general--they were always very prompt with their business claims--though he looked over with more consideration at Stacy’s musings. 

“It’s possible,” he hummed. “Kai-chan and I stopped by the union office once, ‘cause we wanted to ask if they knew who Kai-chan could contact about the local Atua scene, and I dunno about the people we met,” which was...half true. It was obvious that Behemoth believed, since he was a priest, but...it wasn’t something Kokichi wanted to advertise without the man’s consent, “-but they were both very kind to us. Or…”

He looked to the side. “...it was still kindness. But the union leader ended up getting into a debate with Kai-chan...but he did make sure that he was shielded from the rain when they left to go drinking. And the other person in the office had offered to let us dry up before going back, so…”

Kokichi shook his head a little. It had been complicated. 

As was Maki’s situation. He sighed, looking...a bit more glum than someone just missing their friend who was on vacation. “That’s true… She didn’t give us a hard date or anything, but she did say she wanted to make it back in time for Miya’s birth…”

For a moment, there was something genuinely...a mix between longing and regret. “...she doesn’t even know Miya’s name yet… We decided after she stopped being in areas with phones…”

Amber gave Kokichi a soft look, reaching out and ruffling his hair a little as she said, “Your friend seems like the responsible sort, from the little I’ve talked to her and what you’ve said about her. If she said she wanted to be back in time, I bet she’s already worked out a way to do it. Like, maybe she’s already on her way back now.”

“Welllll, if she iiiiis on her way back…” Stacy mused, looking around the stores, “...Does she like to, like, play sports? We could get her, like, ummmmm…. I dunno, I don’t know sports things. A helmet? Do they have helmets in sports? We could get her a cool helmet.” Stacy giggled, shrugging, “Maybe one of those bags you hang from the ceiling and punch a lot? I had a boyfriend with one of those once. He never used it, but I think it made him feel tough to have around.”

Kokichi gave Amber a smile. He really hoped so...but they hadn’t gotten any news from Luminary that would indicate to him that Maki would be leaving anytime soon. Byakuya hadn’t been able to put the pressure on in a way that would break the revolutionaries, but...other than taking most of the eastern farms, which they’d gotten a bit ago, the revolutionaries hadn’t made any strides either. At least from his own view, it was a tense stalemate with the pressure on both sides just continuing to build…

...he wanted to see her again. 

Taking a steadying breath, Kokichi hummed. “Oh, she might actually like one of those… She’d made all these homemade targets for knife-throwing practice in her room. I’ve never really seen her do a lot of hand-to-hand or boxing, but I think she’d get something out just...havin’ a big ol’ bag to beat up on.” He tilted his head, tapping his lips. “I’ll need to find one that’s really sturdy…”

“There’s a sporty sort of store waaaaay down that hallway. Never been in there myself, but, like, it seems like a place to start,” Amber said, pointing in the direction she meant. “Let’s go check it out. Maybe they got, like, gucci versions of target dummies? Heck if I know, but let’s go see if we can’t find her something fancy.”

-

Kaito and Timothy sat on the bench together, Chase between Timothy’s legs, laying down on the ground and doing soft, puppy-- well, calling her a puppy was a stretch, though technically she still was one, the ‘puppy’ bg enough that Timothy could fairly easily use her as a footstool these days, and often did-- snuffles as the two just silently looked out at the gardens together. Kaito and Tim had just gotten finished playing fetch with the large, bulky black lab, and all three of them were resting in the warm spring sun.

Timothy, in turn, was staring at the weird small, white puffs, blowing everywhere in the breeze, and finally asked, “What are those?”

“What are what?” Kaito asked, leaning back against the bench, leaning his face back to bask easier in the rays.

“The…” Timothy tried to think of an equivalent, and settled on, “...the spider web’s blowing around? All bunched up?”

“Oh, um…” Kaito looked up, looking at the… cotton? Things drifting through the breeze and said, “Um… Honestly, kid? No idea.”

“It’s been doing this for days.” Tim said, eyes narrowed suspiciously at the white balls of lazily drifting fuzz, “No one else reacts to them. Do you think it’s normal?”

“Proooobably?” Kaito asked, not sounding at all certain, “They don’t seem to be… hurting anything? I don’t know. Chalk it up to weird Dicea things? Maybe Uncle Shuuichi will know, we can ask him later.”

“Mmm…” Timothy watched the puffs, “Moms not coming back, is she.”

“She is.” Kaito said immediately.

“It doesn’t matter. I don’t really care.”

“...” Kaito frowned, looking over at Tim and, reaching out to jostle his shoulder a little, he said, “She cares a lot about you. She’s coming back.”

“If she cared, she wouldn’t have left.” Tim said simply, “Or she would have taken me with her. You took me with you.”

“Where I was going was less dangerous for you… she cares, kid. I know you havn’t been her’s very long, but… well… she’s cared about me and your uncle Shuuichi since we were kids, and she still left. It’s not about if she cares or not. She just… had something important to do.”

“... she told me that sometimes people will tell you things are important for their own benefit, but they really aren’t.” Tim said, “That they tell you it’s important to get you to act the way they want you to.”

Kaito sighed, looking back up into the sky, sun on his face agan, “She did, huh…”

“Did she tell you it was important too?”

“... she….” Kaito straightened back up, giving Tim an even look, “She told me it was important to her. And I believe her. And, sometimes, that has to be enough, Tim. Sometimes we have to support our loved ones, even if we don’t understand what they’re doing. And what she’s doing is… it’s important to her, that she do it. And… that has to be enough sometimes.” Kaito lectured… though his shoulders fell and he muttered, “As shitty as that feels, sometimes.”

“...Are you going to keep bringing me along?” Tim asked, “When you have to go off and do important things? I don’t mind going… schools always boring anyway.”

“You are the important thing, Tim.” Kaito said, not even needing to think about it before the words came out of his mouth, not noticing the mildly startled look on the child's face before he continued on regardless, “But if something else comes up that needs my personal attention too? Yeah, kid, if it won’t put you in a stupid amount of danger needlessly? Which, honestly, isn’t the sort of thing I’m volunteering for anymore… then, yeah. You can come.” Kaito looked over at him and grinned, “You were such a huge help over on the mountains… I’d be stupid to go anywhere without ya.”

Tim considered him solemnly… before nodding, “Okay.” he said, shrugging his small, thin shoulders, “I guess that’s good too.”

-

It was...kind of uncomfortable, honestly. But Kokichi didn’t want people to worry, so on went his sweatpants and a large, loose--yet covering--sweater. And thankfully there was still a bit of a chill in the air from the rain that poured over the night, so at least he wasn’t overheated too. 

He left from Dr. Cedar’s office to the university, as usual, waving to Drake as he took Shuuichi’s hand. A routine established over the last month and change...that was...probably not going to continue for the rest of the quarter. But it was nice while it was. 

“What kind of cafe do you wanna hit before we go home?” Kokichi asked, trying to...be a little sturdier to give Shuuichi a hand. “Honestly, I’m kinda hungry, so I’ll probably get some food wherever we go too.”

“Mmmmm…” Shuuichi hummed, closing his eyes, and while usually out of embarrassment he did his absolute best to walk ‘normally’, he allowed himself to wobble just for a moment while he let himself get adjusted after a day of sitting at the desks… before he opened his eyes and forced his body to steady as he said, “You remember that ramen place we stopped at? With that hot broth? I think Miya wants that nonsense today. That, or, just… a cup of pure vinegar. Why vinegar?” Shuuichi asked himself, looking mildly disturbed.

Mmm...a nice, big, hot bowl of ramen… Kokichi definitely wouldn’t be able to finish the bowl today, but it would make for some delicious leftovers later. “Ramen it is!” he laughed, before giving Shuuichi a soft look, rubbing his back a little. “And...I couldn’t tell you. I don’t really remember any of the nutrition books talking about vinegar...but I do remember seeing some pickled vegetables as options for toppings, so Shuu-chan can satisfy all his cravings at once!”

“Aaaand I’ll remember to get us some calpico first thing. Miyako wants some real Dicean spice, but we gotta save Shuu-chan’s tender tongue.”

It wasn’t far to the shop, considering they’d found it last time on their way home, and Kokichi gave a bright wave to the same old timer behind the counter, getting their order slips. Passing Shuuichi his, Kokichi asked, “Think you’re just gonna get what you got last time? I really don’t mind explaining whatever you’re curious about.”

For himself...he was gonna get the same, but slightly less spicy. The shop was already warm, and he didn’t wanna make his sweater into a sauna. Plus, Kaito would probably complain about not getting kisses later, and while it was fun, he did want some kisses. 

Shuuichi, once again, looked at the other patrons for clues to what he actually wanted… but there was only two other people in the shop who, frankly, looked pretty likely to be on a date together, and even Shuuichi hellbent on satisfying his daughters cravings wasn’t socially inept enough to go bother them, so he just also got the same thing as lifetime, though this time with pickled vegetables on top.

Sipping on the offered water, they also got a big thing of what was, as far as Shuuichi understood, was just a really good kettle of green tea, but smelled way better than the green tea that Shuuichi was used too. Marveling at it, he murmured, “But how do you get it to not smell like old socks… they have to be putting something else in it. Green tea is the worst, and this is actually passable… it can’t be the same thing.”

Kokichi raised an eyebrow as he sipped at his tea, their table a little loaded with drinks at the moment. “Green tea is fine, what are you talking about. Sure, I personally like, yanno, fruity black teas more, and I’ve always found white teas a little too...I dunno, fancy-schmancy ‘refined palette’-y for me, but...green tea’s just kind of basic?”

Narrowing his eyes, Kokichi gave his boyfriend an appraising look. “...you...you’ve got to have been around green tea in Dicea by now, right? Is the old socks smell a Luminary thing, or a green tea in general thing?”

“...I don’t…. Know.” Shuuichi realized, once again sipping at the green tea with a mildly befuddled look, “I drink green tea because my mentor drank green tea, and she did it because it was good for you… but it’s always just been, easily, one of the foulest tasting things I’ve put in my body. Sometimes I like to drink it purely for the horror of the experience. Like the thrill of getting punched in the face, or suddenly falling. Like… once you’re done drinking it, everything else in your day is so much better in comparison…”

Shuuichi frowned at the green tea, before inexplicably, despite in a somewhat roundabout way praising this particular brew, he reached over and opened up some sugar packets and poured them in. He sipped it again, and while he still looked suspicious, he shrugged, sighing, “How was your appointment today?”

Kokichi snorted a bit. Between black coffee and...what sounded to him like overbrewed green tea, Miss Kirigiri really sounded like the kind of person that loved bitter food. 55% dark chocolate was probably a sweet treat for her. Those kinds of people were powerful in a way Kokichi didn’t understand…

Sipping at his tea a little more, Kokichi...shifted a bit, just kind of shrugging. “It was...weird today. Aunty’s been at all my appointments, but since they’ve been going on so long, and we do a lot of...like, additional sessions of the same stuff, Aunty’s kinda calmed down. She mostly just watches and talks with me, or keeps tracks of my water breaks ‘n stuff… But today I think she almost fought Cedar.”

“We did a circulation treatment today? It didn’t hurt, just kinda...felt like something pinching my skin a little, but…” Kokichi sighed. He didn’t want to freak anyone out, but...of his partners, Shuuichi tended to be a little more levelheaded about this kind of stuff. 

Scooting to the edge of the booth, Kokichi rolled one of his pant legs up, revealing a calf that was a little red still, but had almost perfect rings of red circles in the meatier part of his leg. “She said it was normal for the marks to last for a day, said it’s just...like, stagnant blood coming to the surface and being put back into my system...but Aunty got worried that I was getting bruised…”

Shuuichi frowned at this, narrowing his eyes at the ring marks. “...that looks like it hurt, to me.” He said, not liking the way the marks were perfectly round. Just so… deliberate. “Seiko signed off on this?”

Kokichi nodded slowly. “I mean...well. She said she actually knew this technique, but it’s used as, like, an alternative massage in the north… She said she wasn’t aware of any medicinal benefits it had.”

Seeing that their bowls had come up, Kokichi dropped his pant leg and scuttled over, carefully bringing their ramen to the table in one trip before heading over and getting utensils in another, bringing Shuuichi a fork, but opting for chopsticks himself this time. 

Digging in, Kokichi started to explain more. “It’s like...you have all these little bamboo cups? And you heat up the inside and put it on, she did my legs, upper arms, back, and shoulders, so, one of those places, and it creates a bit of a vacuum. That’s what makes the circles. And you move ‘em around a bit to...I guess, get stagnant blood moving again.”

He slurped his noodles, shrugging again. “It didn’t hurt, really. Just felt kind of...scratchy and weird.” And his skin felt kind of sensitive and tender now… He didn’t really like this treatment, though, he supposed, medicine wasn’t really geared towards being pleasant. 

Shuuichi had thanked Kokichi for grabbing his bowl for him, happily immediately grabbing some of the pickled vegetables, though he was still listening, nodding along with some concern-- that was, what… three treatments now? That he had heard Seiko refer to as ‘massages’?--, not really liking the sound of this at first. Any treatment that bruised, which honestly, too many of Cedar’s did now… he just hated how much worse Kokichi looked, since he started doing this. He was tired all the time, and he was losing weight again. They kept saying that this was just part of the process, but…

Shuuichi’s back stiffened.

He hadn’t recognized the marks… well, of course he hadn’t. He had… he had refused to look at himself for a long time, in the places she had touched. And his mind had glazed over the bamboo cups-- she had used glass, after all. But… but after the longer explanation…

Shuuichi, in a moment of fury, asked, eyes pinpricks, “Where else did she put them?”

Kokichi’s eyes widened, for a single moment actually feeling afraid in the face of Shuuichi’s icy fury that had come out of nowhere. But even as that moment passed, Kokichi still felt himself shrink again, not...sure what he had done to provoke such animosity from his boyfriend. “...just...just what I told you. On my calves and the bottoms of my feet, on my upper arms and shoulders, and on my back…”

“...Shuu-chan...it...she didn’t hurt me. I promise.”

...this was the kind of thing that he would expect from Kaito, except...that Kaito didn’t really do more than frown whenever Kokichi came home with weird marks from a session, or he was tired or tender… He’d only chided once more when Kokichi was complaining about how it was important to listen to the actual doctor among them, but...well. They were all hoping for Cedar’s promise. A life without having to worry about Kokichi’s heart or lungs failing on him was...a miracle, really. They all wanted it, even with all the work it would take to get there. 

...It… it didn’t have to be a sexual thing… even Nao had said that. It was… what had she said? It was a massage from northeastern Dicea. It was a massage… just putting constant pressure on a muscle. It had…

...fuck it had been easily one of the most terrifying moment in that whole fucking thing…

Shuuichi had no idea if his anger and fear was earned or not right now. Just because the way it had been used on him was sexual, didn’t mean Cedar was abusing Kokichi… she hadn’t used it on Kokichi’s chest, or any other overtly sexual part of his body...his calves, his feet, his arms, his back… back for a gentler massage…

("Too bad your cock is too freakishly large to fit into one of these. Feeling every little atom of the skin inside stimulated at once…”)

(“you'd never take it off, would you, whore?")

Forcing himself to relax, Shuuichi said softly to Kokichi, “....Kokichi, if Dr. Cedar is making you uncomfortable? Or doing anything you don’t like, or want to talk about…” well, if she was, Shuuichi was telling Maki that Nazumi was not a good replacement and needed to be dealt with, “... you really don’t have to see her anymore. Honestly, Kokichi… you’ve been looking worse and worse, and Seiko keeps calling your treatments ‘alternative massage therapies’, and…”

Sighing, Shuuichi sipped some more of his not terrible green tea before saying, “Maybe we should put these treatments on hold till we can find some of these ‘success’ cases to prove Dr. Cedars claims. I know we got those letters back from the institutions she referenced, but… I get a bad feeling from all of this…” Shuuichi sighed, “Though, I can’t tell if that’s my paranoia going off or not. I know I’m… not always a good judge for these things, in Dicea, and… I know Kaito won’t agree but… I don’t see how massages fix heart deformities?”

Kokichi sighed deeply and closed his eyes, running a hand through his hair. Honestly...he kind of wanted to cry, but he’d been working on regulating his emotions better with his family, so...there was just this little pinch between his eyebrows. “I’ve...been feeling worse. I’m...back around 92 pounds, and I’m tired all the time, and...I felt really dizzy the other day, but the stuff Seiko gave me helped… I’m so tired of this, Shuu-chan.”

“...but Cedar says we’re just in a long dip before the treatments start showing results and...I’ve already put so much into them… If they really do work, like she says they’ve done for others...I don’t want to give up now.” Kokichi let out a little huff, opening his eyes miserably. “As much as I hate feeling like this...if it’s a few months of this to never have to scare you guys about...telling me things anymore? If I never have to miss days sleeping, if...I can really promise to always be there for people… That’s a trade I’ll take. It just...doesn’t feel good in the middle.”

“...and it’s not exactly easy to get civilian medical records from nations overseas… If Cedar’s already putting all this work in, then...why would she just lie about it? And some of her other patients have been talking about how some of their problems have been helped… I want to believe that she’s earnest about all this…”

And, well… that was always where Shuuichi’s argument faltered.

What would be the point?

As annoying and frustrating as these treatment were, they weren’t exactly… ‘torture’. And they didn’t seem dangerous. If Cedar was someone with a vendetta against Kokichi, she was picking the most roundabout way of getting that revenge-- by mildly inconveniencing him. 

And, well… as frustrating as it was to see Kokichi feeling so sick? He really was just… mildly sick. Worn down. It might not even have anything at all to do with Cedar, according to Kokichi’s medical records. He went through sudden, random lows all the time, his body just… gearing up for it’s latest shutdown. This could just be bad timing. 

And beyond that… she wasn’t making any money. She didn’t seem like he was looking to get rich. Kokichi had put out the theory that a motive could be she would receive ‘clout’, which, like… maybe? He supposed some people just wanted to be famous… though…

He hoped Dr. Cedar understood that… that Luminaries wouldn’t… that Kaito wouldn’t…

If Kaito, after vouching for her, and encouraging Kokichi to push through, found out she was full of shit? For whatever reason?

Shuuichi wondered if Cedar knew her life was in danger?

And mostly because of culture blindness, Shuuichi couldn’t see how that thought wouldn’t have occurred to her by now. So, if this was all for clout? She was actually willing to risk her life for that fame? It just seemed too bizarre. That couldn’t be it…

“...I’m sorry.” Shuuichi said softly, looking at that tense, pinched expression on Kokichi’s face, “I didn’t mean to… I want this to work too. I’d like to be proven wrong, entirely. And I… I am used to seeing the worst in people… I just…” Shuuichi adjusted the brim of his hat and sighed, “I wish it felt more like a sure thing. I know it’s not. I know we have to be patient. I guess I just don’t like medicine where… we feel like the experiment…”

Shugging, Shuuichi sipped at his ramen bowl, before saying with a small smile, “Though, it ended well enough for me… one month pollen free...maybe it really is just a matter of just trusting in the process.”

Kokichi nodded softly, the frustrated look on his face smoothing out into understanding fondness. It was...almost funny that Shuuichi was seeing parallels with himself now, when Kokichi had seen them before…

Returning to his food, Kokichi nodded, accepting Shuuichi’s doubt. “It’s really been one month, huh… It really is amazing. I get how it can be scary and frustrating, but...I mean. Experimental medicine really is just...hit or miss. I’ve seen it enough… I think everyone wishes that they could find something that would heal or aid them in just the way they need, and know it’ll work with certainty, a lot of people vouching for it...but that just...isn’t feasible for specific concerns. Because they’re specific. And bodies can vary so wildly… You just have to hope that your healer is creative and fastidious enough to think of solutions and catch any issues that might come up.”

He sighed with a small shrug. “And...between Seiko and Cedar, I’m hoping doubling up will work in my favor this time.”

Shuuichi was starting to sweat a little, taking a sip of water and eating a little of that things that Kokichi brought him to ease the spice, before going back to the ramen as he huffed, “Well, no matter what Cedar’s massages do, at least it’s not likely to go as entirely wrong as Seiko’s first…” Shuuichi frowned, saying dryly, putting up air quotes, “Birth control.”

“Honestly, I’m still not certain I trust that birth control works on me. Thank god Kaito got snipped.” Shuuichi sighed, looking tired, “Though, if you ever try anything again? Sorry, Kokichi, I’m wrapping a bag around your whole body… just in case. Miyako doesn’t need any more siblings.”

Kokichi sighed. In fairness, she had told them it was experimental and...well, it was implied that they should’ve been careful. It really was just his and Kaito’s faults…

Shaking his head with a bit of a tired smile, Kokichi raised an eyebrow at his boyfriend. “Honey, I’m in full agreement. Like...I don’t know how likely it’d be for us to...ever be in that sort of. Position. Again...but, yeah. Between Tim and Miya, we have enough kids...and if there’s anything to the tradition, I might get what Kai-chan calls a ‘feelings baby’ at some point, so there’s another. We’re good.”

...he and Kaito had talked about it a bunch, but…

Kokichi swirled some of his broth around. “...would you… If I end up getting a feeling about a kid, would...would you wanna adopt them too?”

Shuuichi frowned, furrowing his brow… “Would I be allowed too?” Shuuichi asked, giving Kokichi a curious look, “Or… I suppose I would. Maki and Kaito were allowed to both adopt Timothy and they’re not legally tied to each other… huh…”

Looking down, twirling up some noodles, he said cooly, “Would you like me too? Your child-- you’re ‘feelings baby’-- is essentially being mentored into being an Ouma, correct? Would people not be more comfortable to know its parentage was entirely made up of Ouma’s? ...Even if that only Ouma was you?”

Kokichi gave Shuuichi a curious look, but as he explained...oh. Oh, that would make sense since he didn’t…

“Even if the partner of an Ouma never took the vow, they were still family...you know? Even if a person might not be the right kind of person to help lead a country, there’s still a lot of good they can do, just by living their own life. So...there wouldn’t be any outcry if you adopted them too.” 

...especially if he had asked Shuuichi to marry him by then. 

Almost a little shy, Kokichi smiled up over his bowl at his boyfriend. “...personally...I’d like it if you wanted to be one of their parents. I think Shuu-chan’s gonna be a good father for our daughter, and he’s a good uncle to Tim, so… I mean. There’s not a lot of people I’d trust more to help raise my feelings kid.”

“...but!” he coughed, looking away. “I-if you didn’t want to! I’d understand. I-I mean...you have no obligation and...we’ll already have Miya so...if you didn’t...yeah.”

Shuuichi turned those cool, golden eyes to Kokichi…. And then coughed a bit. The spicy broth going slightly down the wonge tube. Hot hot hot hot oooooowwwwww-!

When his throat finally cleared, sipping water, eyes a little annoyed and watery, Shuuichi gasped out far less cool and sophisticated, “I-I don’t see why not… ngh… I m-mean, we don’t, phew, hoooo… we don’t know when it’s going to happen, right?” Shuuichi asked, sipping some more water, still sweating, “You might feel differently about it wh-when it happens, and that’s fine… but, well, we’re already raising a child together. I don’t mind legally throwing my n-name in the ring for a theoretical ‘nother one, so long as you don’t ask me to grow it inside of me… phew…”

His throat cooled down, Shuuichi went right back to his meal, taking more punishment, Miya fussing around inside of him, enjoying her spicy meal, as the ex-detective said, “So, yes, as of now? I don’t mind the idea…”

Sipping at his noodles, Shuuichi said, “You ever think about the fact that Kaito made himself, like, a harem of parents?”

Kokichi was a bit more concerned about Shuuichi choking on the spice than he was about any theoretical fear of his partner rejecting their maybe future child and he pushed over Shuuichi’s calpico, smiling in understanding after a moment, definitely having moments like that before himself. But what Shuuichi said in between his sputtering?

“...thanks, Shuu-chan. Again, I don’t really believe in the feelings thing myself, but...I mean, every leader before has sworn by it. At the very least, I should ask my partners about the possibility…”

Getting a bit full, Kokichi was thinking about getting a container to take the rest of his ramen home before he looked back up, snorting. “Is that what we all are? There are worse things to be a harem of… And out of all the harems Kai-chan could find himself in, I think this is the one I’m most comfortable with,” he admitted with a sheepish smile, his cheeks pink not just from the ramen.

“I feel like if someone had told me when I was in high school that me and Maki would make up two-thirds of Prince Kaito’s harem of ‘people to raise his children’... well, I’d have probably felt a bit bad for that person, after witnessing what Maki would do to them.” Shuuichi mused, close to finishing his own bowl, having been more hungry than he realized when they had sat down. “But before that, I would have marveled at how, just, dumb that idea was… like, of course. Kaito Momota with a personal harem someday. Ha ha, very funny… now look at us.” Shuuichi said dryly, a thousand yard stare, “The punchline of an obnoxiously short sighted joke.”

Kokichi chuckled softly, sipping from his tea. “If someone told me I’d be a parent at twenty--and not only that, but that I’d have two partners that I loved too? Well, I’d call them a mean liar just for how badly I’d want that future. Wouldn’t wanna get my hopes up that high, yanno? Even if it...is a little early to have a kid, if we had a choice otherwise… But I’m pretty happy with it now.”

“I am too. But it’s still obnoxiously stupid.” Shuuichi huffed, having far less optimistic patience than his partner. “Maybe instead of all of us being in his harem, Kaito’s just a member of all of our individual harems. Maki’s only got one person so far, and you and I get to count each other, so we both have two. Historically, the average harem size is five…”

Shuuichi frowned, “I don’t know if I have enough emotional stamina to take care of three more people… maybe… Drake could be another member of my harem? You’d get Amber, Stacy and Temp too, that’s easy enough…. Maki could get… Lake and Nazumi? Maki needs more friends. We need to fill up her harem slots.”

“Ooooor...we could just be young parents who trust each other to be in each other and our kids’ lives?” Kokichi offered with an amused grin. “I mean, the notice we put out about Miya’s birth did call us a polycule. I think that works pretty well.”

“Mmmm multiple interconnected harem groups sounds more fascinating.” Shuuichi smirked, entirely amused with himself. “If it’s not needlessly complicated, then what’s the point?”

Needlessly complicated, huh…

Kokichi grinned, shrugging, before he looked back down at his half full bowl. “Please take your time, but I think I’m gonna take the rest of this home… It’s too powerful for my stomach!”

He got up with a laugh, but turned to Shuuichi with some slight worry. “Um… Since you...got a little intense… I know the marks on my body look kinda scary… Could I ask you for back up when I show Kai-chan? I really don’t wanna worry him...it looks so much worse than it is.”

Shuuichi looked a little grim agan, his good humor gone. He had… his own reasons, to react that strongly to Kokichi’s… ‘massage’. That immediate, terrified feeling that Kokichi might be being treated… anything like he himself had been treated when that had happened… people trying to… heal them…

“So long as you’re certain it didn’t hurt? I’m sure it’ll be okay. But, yes, I’ll back you up.” Shuuichi promised, looking down at his bowl and just, a determined gleam in his eyes, taking the whole bowl, tipping it back…

Gulp, gulp… ha…

“I’m ready to go whenever you are.” Shuuichi said, sweating a bit, a content look on his face.

Kokichi relaxed, looking over fondly as Shuuichi gulped down his broth. “Thank you, Shuu-chan. I’ll be right back!”

He went back to the counter, exchanging a, well, brief request with the chef, and soon returned with a liquid-proof container, first trying to load in his remaining toppings and noodles to make sure he wouldn’t make a mess pouring in the broth after. “I’m glad you were feeling this place...I’ll always take an excuse to eat ramen.”

“Mmmm, yeah, this was nice… alright.” Shuuichi sighed, looking increasingly glum as he stood up with a clear amount of effort, “...now to walk home… ngh… Can Kaito just carry me home? You always look so comfy, when he does that to you. I would love to curl up and go to sleep and just wake up at home… is it magical? Describe it to me. I wish to live vicariously through you.”

Shuuichi was, honestly, in a pretty playful mood, despite the emotional ups and downs of the previous conversation. Taking Kokichi’s free hand, the two headed back to the castle, weird, unknowable cotton stuff blowing gently through the breeze.

-

The three cacti were remarkably kept, if a little small. But they were very young plants, to be fair. Astrophytum Asterias, the star cactus, barely looking like a nub of a star poking out of its pot; Ferocactus Latispinus, the Devil’s Tongue Barrel cactus, was a little bigger and already covered in fine needles, though its pinkish-red flowers were in partial bloom. Opuntia Papyracantha, the Paper Spine Cactus had a few of its nubs formed, its needles wisping around the body of the cactus.

Nazumi had ordered them from the west, got them settled and cared for in the community garden greenhouse, and she’d shown Thalia the ropes in caring for them, making sure that even though the cacti weren’t native, they’d still thrive. And as the new head gardener, Thalia had been no slouch in keeping the plants happy and healthy until the day arrived that they’d join the rest of the garden. 

Despite the fatigue he’d woken up with, Kokichi could barely keep himself from bounding over to the gardens, chattering excitedly to his partners about the ceremony--which wasn’t actually formal, Kai-chan, don’t worry!--and how they’d finally get to have their plants in the garden, a symbol of their lives imprinted on Dicea…

...he only wished Maki could’ve been there to plant hers too. 

“I’m guessing she’ll have spare gloves for ya, since, yanno, cacti. They’re spiny. And Thalia will guide you in making sure they go in alright, so no worries. Aaaah!!! You’re getting your plants in!!!”

The garden looked stunning in the spring time bloom, and while Kaito had been worried bringing Tim would make him feel left out and forgotten about when they actually started to plant their cacti- “Hey, hey, guys? Don’t charge through the bushes, go around the- aw, fuck.”

The three kids, realizing what Kaito was calling out to them in time, all darted around or hopped above the floral bush they had been bee-lining towards, no problem, but Chase, just running after them, had rammed headfirst into the bush and, after a second of violently jostling, burst through the other side, following the kids deeper into the gardens. Kaito had no idea what they were playing… maybe tag? Who knew. But they were playing it at high speed and were already off in the distance, entirely unconcerned about whatever ‘ceremony’ the adults were doing back on the path. 

Kaito looked at the slightly mangled flower bush, a dog sized hole near its base, and wondered to himself, ‘Maybe no one will notice?’ as he turned to Kokichi and grinned, “Yeah! Man, I can’t believe it’s already time to do this. When Nazumi told us we were planting these things in spring, I’ll be honest, that sounded like a huge amount of time to wait for. Now that it’s here, I feel like time went by like-” Kaito snapped. “-that.”

As she returned down the path towards them--indeed with gloves--Thalia sighed, taking in the hole in the flower bush. That...would take some coaxing to heal…

Kokichi looked at the hole with a little apprehension, but...well, accidents like that happened in public spaces. He’d at least know to give quick approval if the gardeners asked for additional maintenance funds. 

Turning to Kaito, he giggled softly, pressing against his husband’s side. “It really feels like my perception changes on the fly, if it’s felt like weeks since we met, or years. But! It’s time happily spent either way! And now it’s time for you guys to make good on a decision from months ago!”

“Speaking of that…” the young head gardener drawled, approaching the royal family, “Are you two going to want to actually put in the cacti yourselves, or just be here for the planting? Fine either way by me, but...I have to know. Since I’d be planting them otherwise.”

Shuuichi and Kaito looked at each other…

“I mean…” Kaito looked at the pot curiously, his little budding star cacti still in there, “...we just dig a hole or…?”

Meanwhile, getting his home ready for inspection for the thousandth time, Temp suddenly thought, right, shit, he’s gotta reintroduce Kokichi to some Flora… he should start with the garden chick, shouldn’t he? What’s Kokichi up to right now-oh fuck, okay, put some pants on, gotta go, gotta go-

Back in the garden, Shuuichi looked even less confident than Kaito, though he was quite pleased with how delightfully creepy his own cactus had turned out to be, as he said, “I can’t really bend down, on my end, so if you wouldn’t mind planting mine, I would appreciate it.”

Grabbing a trowel as she knelt down, her ashy blond hair tucked into her jacket as usual to keep the long ends out of her way, Thalia nodded. “Alright. How about I plant Shuuichi’s and explain what I’m doing, then you can decide if you want to do yours, Kaito.”

Starting to dig into one of the plots that Nazumi had reserved half a year ago, Thalia monotonously started to narrate her actions. Socializing had...never really been one of her strong suits, by choice. “Dig a hole just a little deeper and wider than the pot your plant is in, keeping the top wider than the bottom. Most of the soil I’m going to take away later, but we’ll need some of it to pack in your plant.”

Kokichi watched aptly, not quite in fascination as he’d been watching people tend to their gardens for...forever, but...it was exciting! His family’s plants were going in the garden!

Holding Shuuichi’s hand, Kokichi filled in a little more than what Thalia was willing to. “Like Aunty said way back when, this area gets a ton of sun, and it’s not near a drain in the soil irrigation, so your cacti aren’t gonna get overwatered. Even if it pours for a few days, they’re hardy enough to be alright, and all the gardeners do regular inspections of the plants for health concerns.”

Thalia nodded, eyeing the slightly dry dirt, full of all sorts of worms and bugs that would do well for the cacti. “Sometimes we’ll have to cordon off certain plants to keep diseases from spreading, but the other gardeners and the garden record claim that they haven’t lost a whole plant in decades. So...you’ll likely always be able to come visit your plant.”

Kaito watched the woman carefully, before looking at the pot of soil next over and, taking another small dirt shovel that Thalia had next to her, started mimicking her in the next bit of dirt, looking over at Maki’s cacti first and trying to eyeball its size before saying, “Will this work? More, or should I put some dirt back in…” Man there were a lot of bugs in this dirt. Kokichi didn’t seem to be freaking out yet, maybe he hadn’t noticed them. Probably best not to call it out then.

Shuuichi looked around curiously, before asking, “Do you all keep records of who’s plant represents who? I imagine if so, this garden substitutes as a sort of memorial. Or a graveyard.”

Kaito sighed, “Shuuichi, man… do you gotta?”

Thalia looked over, glancing at the Devil’s Tongue nearest to the prince and back down at his hole. “The depth is fine, but go a little wider around the edges. It’s usually better to go too big, since you’ll just be filling in dirt again later.”

She’d gone back to work on Shuuichi’s cactus, but snorted with a smirk at the man’s observation. “It is supposed to be a memorial, from what I gather, and there are records. But if you’re looking for a graveyard, I’d suggest going to the actual Memorial Garden. Funnily enough, there are more detailed records for the Community Garden than that one.”

When Thalia had first moved into Usot and started looking into the gardening scene, everything about the Memorial Garden had seemed hilarious and...really hardcore. A place where the burned remains of people coexisted with plants... The ashes nourishing the soil, and life growing from their memories...or something. It was all too easy to guess what Bitch High Queen would think about that...but, reluctantly, Thalia found herself thinking much more like her mother. 

The Flora were meant to help others, supporting them, and while they’d outlast many of the other species they apparently used to mingle with, those memories would nourish their lives and keep them going. A life without connections and compassion was barely a life at all, her mother used to say...and while it all sounded too tiring and annoying to Thalia most of the time, the Dicean model of coexistence… She liked it. You don’t have to be buddy-buddy with your neighbor, but if you need help, they’d be there. And...maybe there were a few humans that weren’t so bad. Especially that werewolf lady that sold flowers in the market. 

“You’ve never been to the Memorial Garden, have you, Shuu-chan?” Kokichi hummed, very purposefully not looking in the holes Thalia and Kaito were digging. “I missed Reflection last year, but...I dunno. Maybe I’ll take a trip over to pay respects to my mom soon…”

...feeling a bit awkward, suddenly, Thalia pulled over the Paper Spine Cactus from the small cart she’d wheeled over with the plants. Gloves on, she placed a hand on top of the soil, the gap between her thumb and index finger around the bulb of the cactus, but not touching it. “...okay. So, you’re going to want to turn the plant over, and pull the pot away, rather than letting the plant drop out. Then give the root system a gentle shake, letting it stretch out, before placing it as even as you can in the hole.”

“Oooookaaaay.” Kaito said, doing his best to mimic her, taking Maki’s plant and turning it over, mildly worried the soil would just immediately crumble to nothing, despite what Thalia’s soil was doing. It was so dark and packed together though… huh. Okay, now, pull the thing off of it...patience, don’t shake it… okay, maybe shake it a little bit. 

Finally freeing the plant front the pot, he followed her motion again, gently shaking it, though he had no concept of knowing if he had ‘stretched’ it or not, and then carefully placed it into the hole… “Eyyyy, look at that. One weird cactus, ready to go… what’s this thing called again?” Kaito asked, looking curiously at the many, many sharp needle like things, coming off of Maki’s plant.

“Good,” she hummed at Kaito’s work. “Now, take small handfuls of the dirt we dug out and scatter it into the empty space--you want it to be secure, but not packed. ...that one is… Ferocactus Latispinus. A variety of barrel cactus--the shape--known as the Devil’s Tongue.”

Smirking a little as she settled Shuuichi’s cactus in the dirt, Thalia explained a little more. She had always been interested by the plants in her mother’s estate, but it wasn’t until she moved to Dicea--where they were fuckin’ plant-crazy--that her knowledge started to become a little encyclopedic. Apparently, it was something that all the head gardeners tended to get as the job went on. 

“See how cute and delicate all the little combs of flowers are? And especially when it gets into full bloom. It tricks you into leaning close, right before it gets you with the tons of thin little needles letting the flowers take your attention. There’s probably some bigger folklore story to the name, but it seems self-explanatory enough to me.”

Kokichi huffed a soft laugh. Maki had picked it for that reason, and while she didn’t need to rely on a trick like that anymore...it still fit her. Because the cactus wasn’t actively hurting anyone. If you got into its space in a way it didn’t like, then you got what was coming. 

“Course that’s it’s name.” Kaito sighed, looking warily at the Maki plant. He had an almost morbid desire to poke one of the needles, just to see if it would actually sting him, and if so, how hard… but, well, he had plenty of scars already from Maki herself. Might as well not add to them of his own accord…

Though the flower was very pretty. 

Looking over at Shuuichi’s plant, as he carefully placed back some more soil around Maki’s, he said, “Awww… that one came out cuter than it does in the pictures.”

“No it didn’t.” Shuuichi said, raising an eyebrow at Kaito, “It’s still pretty creepy and weird.”

“Nah, man, look at it. It’s adorable. It’s spines are all bendy and stuff… it looks like it wants pets.”

“No cactus wants pets, Kaito.”

“Sloft, spindly cacti do.” Kaito affirmed, entirely convinced of this now. If there was ever a cactus that looked like it wanted a little gentle pat? Definitely Shuuichi’s. 

(Kaito hadn’t said anything about the memorial garden, when Kokichi brought it up, but in the back of his mind…)

(Sigh… he really didn’t actually want to go back there. But maybe he should offer to take Kokichi, if his husband wanted to go visit his mom.)

Kokichi giggled softly as he laid his head against Shuuichi’s arm, squeezing his hand gently. Even with Shuuichi’s spines, nothing could keep Kaito away. And maybe he’d have to confront that someday, but...most of the time, for now, Kaito’s Kaito Goggles were endearing. 

Finishing up with Shuuichi’s cactus, she gave a respectful nod to the man himself. “Now you’ve made your mark in the garden. There’s a lot of symbolism and meaning and all that stuff that’s supposed to be a part of this, but,” she shrugged. They were foreigners, and she had a feeling Shuuichi didn’t care much about the sentimentality that, even now, was making the heir’s eyes misty. “You have your own plant in the garden now. Cool.”

Turning back to Kaito, she asked, “Since you did your friend’s, and it went well, you wanna put yours in too?”

“Yeah, sure!” Kaito said cheerfully, looking at Maki’s flower with no small amount of pride. He had done it! Woo! Now on to his~

As Kaito started to dig a little more, he heard the sound of running feet, and called out over his shoulder, “Kids, if you’re making a mess, then… shoot, I don’t know? We’re leaving the gardens if you’re making a mess? Is that a punishment? They’re not gonna wanna stay here if they have to just stand around and look… I’m definitely not telling your parents… don’t really wanna do the whole ‘cut’ thing Maki does…”

As Kaito murmured to himself, trying to figure out how the hell one disciplines your kid and his friends for being too rambunctious (edging on destructive), he glanced over his shoulder and, while that was still something he needed to figure out, he was spared having to make a decision as he realized, “Oh, you’re not the… Temp??”

“Oh...hello!” Temp said, catching his breath as he pushed some raven hair out of his face, waving at all of them as a bead of sweat went down his face, “...heh...phew… what a coincidence! I was… phew… sorry I was just running.” Temp said, gesturing behind himself, “Through the gardens. Pretty place to run. First time doing that. Should do it more often.”

Kokichi looked over in surprise, though it was quite a pleasant one and he gave his friend a grin. “Temp! Hey! How’s it goin’? Are you starting up a new work-out routine or something?”

Though...it was kind of weird one, going for a run in the middle of the afternoon… But considering how weird Temp’s work hours could be, he supposed that his friend just wanted to take what time he could here and there.

Bouncing on his toes a little, Kokichi gestured out to the cacti. “We’re doing the planting ceremony for Shuu-chan, Kai-chan, and Maki-chan’s plants today! Look at how lovely they are! Thalia, Nazumi, and the other gardeners did a wonderful job cultivating them!”

Thalia didn’t pay the newcomer much mind, just surveying Kaito’s work on planting his own cactus, though she did give Kokichi a little nod of appreciation for his recognition. 

“Oh, are you? That’s exciting. I have some white Cala Lily’s planted around here somewhere...it’s probably blooming again by now. I should check it out while I’m here.” Temp mused, heading over to the group and giving the cactus’s an interested glance-- ahhh, he had been so tempted to pick cactus’s when he had been picking out a plant too-- before giving Kokichi a warm nod.

“I’m fine, just felt like getting some fresh air today. The weather’s perfect, isn’t it… oh, Thalia. I’ve heard about you, you’re the new head gardner, yes? Congratulations, I’ve heard there’s a lot of competition every year to get that spot. I’m sure your position is well earned…” Temp frowned, realized that he was in Templar mode, and relaxed his stance, saying much more casually, “That’s awesome… hey, Kokichi? Do you work at all with the head gardeners? Like, I don’t know… do your jobs intersect at all?”

Kokichi nodded, with a grin. It was gorgeous weather today, the sun out and shining with a few clouds in the sky, giving people who didn’t like constant sun so much the occasional reprieve, and while the ground was dry, there was a certain freshness in the air from the recent rain. The perfect sort of day to get outside and do whatever you wanted, be it go running or plant some cacti.

Thalia and Kokichi exchanged a moderately surprised look at being addressed like that before Kokichi half shrugged. “Not particularly… I mean, we all meet with the head gardeners every year,” he nodded to Thalia, “And sometimes I handle the budget reports for the garden, and, like, it’s a community space, so if there are any issues it goes up to the admins but… I wouldn’t really call us co-workers, or anything.”

Nodding a little to agree with Kokichi’s assessment, Thalia gave the black-haired man an appraising look. “...if you wanted to ask me something, you could just tell me, rather than going through a friend. Kokichi and I have met...probably five times? So if you have something to say, say it.”

“Oh… sorry…” Temp said, thinking fast…

And Kato, brushing some sweat off his hairline, stood up and looked proudly down at his handiwork, before saying, “Yeah, forgive him, that’s a really weird habit of his. Dude likes to just talk around things rather then just asking straight out for favors or what he means. My ‘Kichi does that a little bit too.” Kaito said cheerfully, patting Kokichi on the back, before remembering, “Ah… my gloves… hold on babe, you got some… uh, I’ll get it off.” Kaito said sheepishly, taking off his gloves and brushing the dirt off of Kokichi’s back.

“Well… sorry, again, I…” Temp blushed, “I was hoping you could… sorry, this is so presumptuous… I was hoping you’d be willing to… teach… me how to garden? I want to teach my kid plant stuff, but I don’t know any plant stuff… gardening would be good for him, and… but I don’t have a kid yet… but like… soon…” Temp put his hands together and said, with a small chuckle, “Yeah, that’s what I was hoping to ask you, Thalia. I know some gardeners in the past will do plant-raising classes for folks looking to learn, like myself… was wondering if you were still doing things like that, these days… so I could teach my kid how to garden someday.”

“Oh, huh… that’s an idea.” Kaito admitted, looking down at the plants he had just, well, ‘planted’.  “...maybe I should do that too? Planting seems like an easy way to convince a small kid to do some strength based exercising…”

Kokichi gave his husband a sheepish look while Thalia nodded in understanding once this Temp guy finally spat out what he wanted. Sighing, she sat back in her crouch, looking over the newly planted cacti. “Yeah, there are apparently a lot of beneficial stuff to teaching kids to garden. Hand-eye-coordination, long term planning, being able to see products of your effort, and it is more active than a lot of people give it credit for… Along with respect for the earth stuff, but I think that more depends on what the teacher wants to say.”

Judging that the cacti were properly planted, Thalia rose from her spot on the ground, clapping out her gloves from dirt. “Yeah, those classes should be starting up soon--should be some reservation page on the community board in the castle. I’m not personally teaching them, but the other gardeners are more than qualified and have been here longer than me. They can explain the culture better, at any rate.”

“Oh, really? Where are you from, if you don’t mind my asking? I don’t know your accent.” Temp asked, while Shuuichi quietly watched all of this, Kaito now trying to get the dirt off his legs. Damn… these were his nice jeans too…

“Danganronpa,” the woman drawled, unsure if Temp was trying to look for something else, or if he was trying to flirt with her. “Moved here last year.

“Thalia from Danganronpa, the head gardener…” Temp said, looking over to Kokichi… well, this wasn’t a perfect introduction. But, Temp had promised Kokichi he’d introduce him to a Flora, regardless if Kokichi remembered anything yet or not, and Temp was… well, honestly, he was bound by his promises. 

So, with that in mind… “You’ve only moved here this last year? That must be tough… could I as-”

“Hey, Thalia, do you want to get a cup of coffee with me sometime?” Kaito asked, looking curiously over at her. “As a gardener from Danganronpa, I’d actually really love to pick your brain about something, if you wouldn’t mind sparing me an hour or so of your time. Plus, as someone who also moved here out of the country in the last year… I don’t know.” Kaito grinned, shrugging, “It’d be nice to talk to another newbie. You up to it?”

Temp felt a throb in his forehead… that was his line… you couldn’t just… straight out say it…

...why did that feel so pointed? Kokichi gave Temp a confused look as their eyes met. There wasn’t...it didn’t matter that Thalia was an immigrant. She was Dicean all the same. Temp had never shown any prejudice against immigrants before and had nothing but fond nostalgia for his grandfather who had moved their family to Dicea before Temp was born. And, hell, Kokichi had known that Thalia was from Danganronpa--Shuuichi had asked about it during Harvest. 

Thalia raised an eyebrow, feeling...kind of unsure and weirded out by the sudden attention of two people. But...she’d come to Dicea to get rid of that feeling. To move out of her mother’s estate and stop being Little Lythalia, baby of the Nohrans. Even then her mother had traveled all the way to Dicea to make sure she was settling in fine, and...Thalia had told her she could stand on her own now. 

Sighing, she put her hands in her pockets. “Sure, why not. My hours are pretty flexible, so just let me know in advance so I can schedule around it.”

“Awesome! I appreciate that, we’ll do it soon, if you’re up to it!” Kaito grinned, before saying to Shuuichi and Kokichi, “Guys, come look at my cool star cactus thing. I think our plants came out looking pretty cool! We got good taste.” Kaito laughed, admiring the little baby plants. “We have to get Tim to pick out a plant for himself though… geez, where on earth did those kids get too…”

As Kaito looked around, peering through the brush for his three troublemakers, Temp looked between Kokichi and Thalia and… well… maybe this would be easier to do as an empath, actually. If he could reach out to Thalia in the other plain and ask her if she’d be willing to teach himself and Kokichi how to raise Flora, well… it’s definitely easier than trying to bring it up around a bunch of non-empath humans and a sleeping empath, anyway. 

“Alright, well, I should continue my run… oh, Shuuichi, I should ask while you’re here, how are you feeling?”

Shuuichi gave Temp a cool look, “...fine. Thank you.”

Temp nodded, having wanted to test how Shuuichi’s conditioning was coming along, but you didn’t have to be an empath to realize Shuuichi’s guard was up around Temp right now, so the Templar just cut his losses and said, “Good, glad to hear it… alright, I’m going back to my run. It was nice seeing you all.”

And off he went.

Kokichi gave his friend a grin and a wave--maybe Temp would be willing to open up about what all that was about later. “See ya! It was nice chattin’!”

Coming to Kaito’s side, Kokichi pressed a kiss to his arm. “They look awesome, hun. And now...a little piece of you guys will always be in Dicea. Flourishing alongside everyone else…” Kokichi let out a little breath, honestly overjoyed, even if it was just a few plants. “Thank you and all the other gardeners for your help, Thalia.”

The gardener nodded and went back to her cart, aiming to wheel it back to the greenhouse. “It’s what we do. Holler if you need anything, and enjoy the gardens. Please ask your kids to be aware of the plants they’re running through, if you could.”

“Yeah, sorry about that… Tim! Cali? Chase, here girl! Ah geez… I’ll go find them.” Kaito sighed, running off.

-

Maki was sitting on the roof of a farm, staring out into a long field in the haze of twilight. It was a nice view, the farm itself raising potatoes, their thick, green sprouts surprisingly vibrant and soothing to look at, despite the tan, ugly lumps they sprouted from, and further off was long, long stretches of wheat fields. Green against a field of gold, shimmering in the setting orange sky of the burning sun…

Maki sighed, running her hand through her hair, getting annoyingly longer every day… she needed to cut it. She kept meaning too. The days were so busy, and she slept so little now.

She wished she were home, and squashed that feeling down bitterly. There was nothing she could do about that, and thinking about it would be a waste of her time.

...she had promised Shuuichi…

The week had passed by surprisingly quickly, and before he knew it, Kokichi was waking up in his head on Friday night, he and Kaito choosing not to go dancing that night. As much as he liked it, it was something that would probably be beneficial for...whatever it was he, Alter Ego, and Temp wanted to call their experiments. 

Kokichi hadn’t really noticed anything new with Shuuichi over the past week, but...well, he wasn’t prone to triggering Shuuichi’s info dumps these days either. Like they’d discussed, it would be rather difficult to really be able to see an outward change in Shuuichi if Griffin was working out. But...Kokichi was hopeful, and he had a good feeling about it.

Today would be a new challenge. 

Calling Alter Ego--thankfully rested and recovered--and Temp into his mind, Kokichi sighed, stretching a bit even if it was all metaphorical. “Maki-chan...doesn’t sleep much. Even when she was...relatively at ease here, she still would wake up super early, and if there was even the possibility of something going on, she’d stay up for it. Right now...I don’t think she’d let herself sleep much at all so...hopefully we can just catch her not doing something super important…”

Turning to Temp, Kokichi offered a soft smile. “You up for giving it a shot tonight?”

“Between trying to talk to your family in the waking world and doing a huge test of power to fix what historically even our greatest empaths haven't worked out how to fix...yeah, this is way less stressful.” Temp sighed, while Alter Ego, from Kokichi’s shoulder, looked smugly at him.

“You’ll get better,” Kokichi encouraged. “Though, I think Shuu-chan thinks you’re kinda weird now too… And, honestly, I thought that you might’ve...had some bigotted views? When you were trying to tell me Thalia’s a Flora. I couldn’t figure out otherwise why you’d stress so much that she was from Danganronpa.”

Kokichi sighed, fixing some hair behind his ear. “But...I think it’ll be sooner, rather than later, that I’ll figure out what you meant. I think some of my...empath reasoning is really starting to bleed through to my waking consciousness. It’s confusing the hell out of me, but if it’s happening that much, then I think I’ll start figuring it out soon.”

Taking another breath, Kokichi tried to focus on seeking out Maki’s mind. He’d never tried before, so it would be a little difficult, but...he thought he knew her alright. His dear friend who had been taught that her big heart was a liability, rather than one of her greatest strengths...and even in that situation, had turned it into a strength in that area too. Unstoppably determined and deeply kind. Maki…

“Yeah, and then your husband stole my chance to ask her to lunch.” Temp pouted, wearing his ceremonial Bathul Templar robes, hovering slightly above the ground, just sulking… before he sighed. Shake it off, Temp. Got a Luminous psyche to save. Be on your A-game, Templar! 

Following Kokichi into the path he opened, they stepped out in the strong scent of a farm, stagnant water and that intense scent of wet dirt and thick flora. It was still twilight, and Maki was still on the roof. 

Alter Ego looked around… “Interesting… no lounge, this time. Why then… why did Shuuichi and Kaito’s minds both have lounges?”

“Maybe the style of conditioning?” Temp theorized, looking around and feeling out, confirming Alter Ego’s observation. No closed loop, they had access to the whole mind from here. Though… “Do you feel that?”

“What?” Alter Ego asked, looking around, genuinely confused. 

“...It’s smaller on the inside than it is on the outside.” Temp said, feeling out, “The edges of her mind doesn’t go as far as her essence.”

“... I…” Alter Ego looked at Kokichi sheepishly, “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’ve never come across that before.”

Kokichi raised an eyebrow. So Temp had wanted to ask Thalia out? Well...Thalia did seem like someone who appreciated directness… Perhaps he’d get another shot. It wasn’t like Kaito was trying to ask her out. 

Looking around Maki’s mind, Kokichi was able to identify that they weren’t in a lobby, but...he pressed his lips together, looking around. “...I don’t...really get that. I dunno why, but Maki-chan just feels really...big. I don’t...know what I’d be looking for for...her mind being smaller than her essence…”

But it did feel like Maki. Sometimes just normally it felt like her force of will was bigger than the things they understood. 

“...Maki-chan is really...hm. She doesn’t trust easily. She’s always on guard. Hopefully I’ll be able to talk to her, but if she doesn’t wanna talk about it… I know she has obedience conditioning, and...she’s said her emotional conditioning wasn’t perfect, but I don’t really understand it myself. I know we’ll have to find the actual metaphor, but...maybe knowing that will give you a hint of what to make.”

Figuring that they’d do the same as last time, Kokichi pulled at his memory of Maki, letting her own mind come forth to fill it in. 

Maki formed, and for a moment, briefly, she wore two long pig tails, ribbons and a cute, youthful skirt… but she frowned after a second, putting her hands through her hair, and by the time she had done it, her hair was short again, a black blazer over a short, feminine red dress, black leggings going down into her extremely comfortable and durable boots. And, blood red eyes flicked to Kokichi, to his companions, and finally to the surface Maki, who had gone to bed thinking about the farm, those thoughts chasing her into sleep. 

… she put a finger to her mouth, before motioning the three to follow her deeper into her mind, not wanting them anywhere near surface her. Waking Maki didn’t need whatever confusion this exchange would bring. Maki could handle it herself, without having her waking self worry about it later. She trusted herself like that.

Stepping into the other side of a shadow, the four stepped out into the side of a mountain, a ragged, hastily made campsite put together on a small, honestly precarious ledge on the side of the mountain, a steep fall awaiting anyone with the foolish inclination to not watch their footing, and another several feet of climbing above them to get back into the greater forest part of the mountain, a rope that Maki had climbed down to the ledge her way back up. The ledge was safer from the wildlife than a tree or, obviously, the forest floor… and besides, it was a nice view.

Lighting the small fire, leaning against the rock wall, Maki looked at Kokichi for awhile… observing…

“Hello, Miss Harukawa. My name is-”

“Alter Ego.” Maki filled in, looking over at Temp, “The Templar. Shut up. I’m still absorbing…”

Maki frowned, brow furrowed, while the three stared at her, waiting for permission to speak… when Maki sighed. “Well, I guess this is as close to real as you can get right now. Give me a hug then.”

Even if he’d seen her visage, a mash of memories from him and Shuuichi, just a week ago...this was Maki’s Maki. And seeing her, seeing her change into a more comfortable appearance…

Kokichi wasn’t surprised when she told them to be quiet, to follow into a more secure--and beautiful...that view was incredible…--location, even cutting off formalities… His heart swelled, and he wasn’t ashamed at all by the longing, adoring look on his face. 

And at her okay, Kokichi let out a hushed little, “Eeee!!” sound and surged forward to hug Maki, holding her close. He looked up with a slightly teary but incredibly wide grin. “I’ve missed you…”

Maki smiled softly, hugging him lightly back, and said, “I try not to let myself… but I’ve missed you too. It’s a hassle.”

Letting him hold her for a moment, Maki sighed, before gently pushing him back, giving him a once over and frowning, “...I can’t see you. The real you, I mean. I think? I’m doing my best to let what you know be what I know, but it’s... tricky.” She said, a displeased look on her face, as she took Kokichi’s chin in her hand and tilted his face this way and that, looking at his skin, the edge of his eyes, “... you seem healthy, but this is just a projection of you… I think… are you well? If you’re anything less than well by the time I get home, Kaito’s getting another piercing.”

Kokichi laughed softly, and while he wished for nothing more than to keep his arms around her all the way back home, but...that was impossible, and not why they were there. In some ways, he thought it was almost impressive that he hadn’t come to visit Maki just on a social call before this. 

Even the familiar motions of her inspection made his chest warm, but Kokichi could only give her a tired smile. “I’m alright. I’ve been...kind of tired lately, but… Well. A new doctor came to me at the New Year and...she’s been doing a lot of traveling overseas to learn other countries ways of doing medicine, and she said that some of the treatments she learned could fix my heart and lungs enough I wouldn’t have to worry about attacks anymore. And…--like, of course we did background checks,” he insisted, giving Maki a look, “but I’ve been going through the treatments and...it’s kind of a ‘gets worse before it gets better’ right now. But I am okay!”

Kokichi shook his head, realizing his ramble. “But that’s not why we’re here! We’re here to ask if Maki-chan would be willing to let us try and disable her conditioning. So…” He deflated slightly from his insisting tone, giving his friend a softer look. “...would you?”

Maki frowned… that was a point. She was back home, she should ask around about doctors who specialize in heart and lung shit. She was close enough that if she heard about one that was particularly good, she could, theoretically, snatch one and bring em home to look at Kokichi.

...hmmm.... Though preferably without actually having to kidnap them… well, she’d find out if there was any difference between Luminary and Dicea medicine first, and work her way through ‘not kidnapping them’ when it became relevant. She’d talk to Kaede about it, get one of those bastards on the phone.

But, outloud, she nodded, “Sounds difficult… but I’m pleased to hear you’re getting through it. My threat stands though. Kaito better be looking after you both, or I’m giving him another shell earring…” she frowned suddenly conflicted. She wanted to ask about Shuuichi…

She… ‘knew’ he was as fine as could be expected though. Because Kokichi knew that. And if there was anything that wasn’t leaking through, Kokichi would have told her by now.

As for his request… Maki stepped back, crossing her arms, looking critically at Temp and Alter Ego. “... don’t suppose I need to explain to anyone that my situation, at the moment, is a little precarious. I don’t have the liberty to let down my guard even for a moment out here. Between threats from without, not to mention cowardice and betrayal from within… I’m not exactly, at the moment, anyone’s favorite person right now, with the exception of those idiots following their stupid ‘legend’.” Maki huffed, looking tired and frustrated, back tensing, “...I’ve been…” Maki looked briefly at Kokichi, her expression… reserved. Tense. “I’ve been offering a lot of unpopular opinions, and…” she sighed.

She loved Kokichi, but she couldn’t confide in him. As much as she would like too. It would just burden him. Looking back to Temp, she said, “Have you all figured out if there are side effects yet? I can’t be slow, or distracted right now, and you’re putting things into my head. Have you all looked into possible side effects at all yet?”

Kokichi nodded kindly. But...they were doing as well as anyone could expect right now. Shuuichi was still mobile at the moment, and other than just being big and nearing his due date, he was in good health. If everything continued as it was, Kaito’s ears would be saved when Maki returned. 

...and Maki would return. Even if her current situation was...difficult. 

Sighing, Kokichi twirled a bit of his hair around. “It’s been about two months since I made Kai-chan’s defence. Granted, at first none of us had known what I’d done and...I made her to deal with a different problem, but…” Kokichi frowned a bit. “...he did seem a little distracted for a while. Like...he wasn’t totally sure what he wanted to say, when it wasn’t a stock answer provoked by his conditioning. Shuu-chan hasn’t seemed any different, but it’s only been a week…”

He slumped slightly. “...as much as I’d want to promise that it can be done no problem… I don’t want to put Maki-chan in danger ‘cause...I dunno. She’d hesitate in confusion when someone’s orders don’t work. Or if she’d feel something more strongly than she’s used to...if that’s even how that works.”

“...but so far, there haven’t been any physical side effects. I can at least attest to that.” 

Maki sighed, wandering over to the edge of the ledge, looking down at the view, brow furrowed as she thought about it.

“...it’d be nice if I didn't have to obey. Kaede hasn’t triggered my conditioning because she knows even my loyalty isn’t endlessly patient… we haven't exactly been… on the same page since I’ve gotten here.” Maki confessed, looking more frustrated again, “...she hasn’t threatened it, but if she decided to force the issue? Which she might feel like she has too, then… I can’t guarantee I wouldn’t obey. I know I shouldn’t have to obey. She’s not in my… she doesn’t own me. I’m not supposed to obey someone who doesn’t own me, and technically, no one does now… but… my feelings don’t always recognize that.”

Chewing on the tip of her thumb, a habit she had started developing now that she didn’t have enough hair to pull and she was feeling particularly stressed lately, she mused, “Honestly, her forcing my conditioning is a worst case scenario… maybe potential side effects would be worth that… but I can’t afford to be slo-”

“This debate is unnecessary.”

“Um... guys?” Alter Ego said, sprinting over to Kokichi, curling his body through Kokichi’s legs, ears standing straight up, fur a little puffed in alarm as they looked back where they had just darted from, “Something’s up with Temp.”

Temp’s expression was… strange. His edges too firm, like his face was tensed up into a frown, without actually frowning. His expression, actually, looked mildly concerned, his eyes too wide and staying that way, small, puffs of energy slowly radiating off of him, his eyes itself entirely black, the white of his eyes gone. 

And despite the deep black void of his eyes, and his tense, stiff posture in his body… he looked between the group, again, a mild look of concern on his face, before bowing his head slightly. Stepping forward towards Maki.

Maki scowled, and immediately stepped forward, grasping Kokichi by the back of his shirt and pulling him back, before stepping forward, knives out, her stance ready to fight, if that’s what this was.

Kokichi looked down, regret in the pinched shadows of his face. It had all been such a mess… If he had just understood the world his friends came from a little better, then the moment Maki had shown him her plans--Kaede’s plans--he could’ve asked why she needed his permission. Instead he had assumed that she had wanted his insight, had wanted him to take responsibility, and had trusted him enough to try and counteract any orders she might run into back in Luminary…

Maybe it would’ve changed things for the worse, but...it certainly had caused them all a lot of heartache. 

And even now when she’d chosen her own path, that last point was still a thorn in everyone’s side…

Kokichi sighed. As much as he wanted to do this for Maki, it would always be her decision. If she didn’t consent, then they wouldn’t do anything. That was their agreement. 

But...it didn’t sound like Maki was completely shutting it down. Kokichi put on a considering look, trying to think of how to figure out what would best suit them all when he jumped, surprised by Alter Ego curling around his legs, and that voice that just seemed...more.

Looking at all the changes in Temp with worry...it was almost funny, in the back of his head, as he stumbled back in Maki’s grip. He had been about to step in front of her. 

Hardening his expression a bit, but more wary than defensive, Kokichi spoke slowly. “...why is it unnecessary? We all promised to only give people defences if they consented to it. That consent is the most important part of all of this.”

Kokichi’s eyes narrowed slightly in curiosity, perhaps about to look like a fool, but...the softness in his voice wasn’t fear. “...Bathul?”

Bathul stopped, looking to Kokichi, again, his expression just… stiff and concerned. His words, in turn, stiff and slow, like he wasn’t entirely certain what his words would sound like aloud syllable to syllable, as he said, “Consent is vital. All trades rely on the agreement of the parties. I would not force a trade without consent. This trade is-”

“If you don’t stop walking forward, I will risk my sanity, kicking you out of here.” Maki hissed, heat starting to radiate off of her, fury in her gaze.

Bathul stopped, giving her a concerned look, clearly uncertain what to do… and he stilled. Sort of just standing there, his arms hanging awkwardly and uselessly, something fundamentally wrong with how he held himself. Uncertain in his Templar’s form. 

“...Yes. I understand.” He said, before continuing on, no breaths or breaks in his thought process, as slow as his words were, “The trade you are proposing, Dicea, is unnecessary. There is nothing you can provide this one that she cannot provide herself. I offer a trade of memories.”

“...Kokichi?” Maki asked, voice low, “...what the fuck is happening?”

Everything he had learned about Bathul from Temp had reassured Kokichi not to be afraid. Death was a natural part of life, and Bathul wasn’t the one who caused death. Trades were maybe unemotional, but they were not cruel, and there was no point in being misleading or unfair with them. 

...still, it was very, very unsettling to be talking with a being that so clearly didn’t belong in this realm, especially in his friend’s body. 

“...it’s weird,” Kokichi warned, very carefully putting a gentle hand on Maki’s shoulder. “So...gods are real. This is Bathul, the god of death and trade--this is the god Temp’s the Templar of. I’m...assuming this is part of the deal between them, that Bathul can be channeled through Temp’s body to speak with mortals.”

Kokichi narrowed his eyes, now trying to actually understand what the god was saying with the “easy” introductions out of the way. “He’s...saying that you’re able to break your own conditioning. That you’re powerful enough for that but...that you just don’t remember how?” Kokichi glanced up at Temp-Bathul, hoping he’d understood that correctly. “And...he’s offering a trade--which are respected right to the exact terms for the god of them--to...give you the memories you’d need to do that.”

Pursing his lips, Kokichi looked back up at the god. “...but what do you want in return?”

“I have my templar’s permission.” Bathul said simply, before saying with barely a beat in between thoughts, “The return of memory is my side of the trade. I request that, in return for whatever you would wish to ask for in trade.”

“...You…” Maki still hadn’t actually relaxed her fighting stance, though this was a little much, even for Maki as she said, uncertainly, “...a god of death is… asking me? For a trade? To put memories inside of me?”

“I misrepresent myself.” Bathul said, no beat, “Not to place memories. To release memories you already harbor. What would you trade for permission, Maki Harukawa?”

“...Okay, I’m lost.” Maki admitted, lowering her knives, just giving the… god?? A befuddled look, “If I have memories already that could break my conditioning, why would I not want them to be released in the first place?”

“I have no reason to believe you would not want your memories back, once they were returned.” Bathul said, followed immediately by, “But I cannot force you to remember as you are now without offering a trade in turn. I do not offer your memories back for your sake, but my own. Thus, a trade is required.”

Alter Ego wanted to ask what the God of Death and Trade had to gain from this… but honestly? The ‘abomination’ was terrified of getting this things attention. The Templar had wanted to ‘fix’ them the first second he saw them: this God might not bother ‘asking’. 

...it honestly sounded too good to be true. Maki getting back pieces of herself, pieces strong enough to heal what conditioning had done to her. And, on top of that, getting to request something from the God of Death and Trade??

...Temp had said that Maki’s essence was larger than her consciousness. Size was metaphorical when it came to minds, but...putting something very large in something very small…

Kokichi frowned in worry. “...then the same question still stands. Would Maki-chan be hurt by getting her memories back? I don’t mean in terms of ‘want’ but...the time she might need to process everything in her waking mind… Would it be a process that wouldn’t put her in danger through disorientation or hesitation?”

Looking at his friend, Kokichi gave her a soft look. “...I know you’re a lot stronger than I am, but...I don’t remember all this stuff when I wake up. We...think it’s a defence mechanism. And...honestly, I don’t know how I’m gonna take it when I do remember. I think...this kind of caution is warranted.”

“Oh, no, I’m with you. This feels like a scam.” Maki huffed, giving a literal God, Maki… an entirely unimpressed look, everything in her body language challenging him as she said, “How about this: if the next thing out of your mouth isn’t a comprehensive explanation of the pros and cons of this trade, for both of us? Then it’s a blanket no, and I never want to see you again. And don’t think talking a lot is the same as conveying information. If I still have questions at the end of your explanation? I won’t ask them. I will simply say no and never think of this again.”

Now the god in his templar’s body looked more offended and less concerned, frowning a hint of anger in his gaze as he opened his mouth… before hesitating. Thinking about his next words.

“...you and I already have a trade put into place, to both of our benefit. You, however, do not remember the trade due to the interference of another, young, naive god. With the return of your memories, a trade already put into place that I am invested in will be honored. The return of your memories could, potentially, harm you, but I will take pains to not allow that to happen. If you agree to our trade, I will return your memories to you little by little, allowing your human psyche to adjust before new memories are added. This will take time, and over that time, you may feel more worn down as your body adjusts, but so long as I remain diligent and patient, which I will, you will not fall to harm.” Bathul paused, thinking, “One aspect that you may call ‘harm’, is that there is a potential possibility that your personality, as it is, could be overwhelmed by the personality of who you were in your lost memories-”

“How likely is that?” Maki asked, tensing.

“-it would depend upon your current strength of will-”

Maki relaxed, “Nevermind, it’s not a concern. Keep going, I apologize for interrupting.”

“-another aspect of harm is that it will put you in a battle a version of you has already sworn to fight.” Bathul said, before adding in immediately, “But you are already involved in this fight, and will simply, in practicality, have more leverage against your enemies.”

Maki frowned at this. “Which enemies? Byakuya?”

“Not Atua’s child, no. Luminary’s scuffle is a mere symptom of your true enemy.” Bathul said, his expression tensing again, though his eyes remained impossibly wide, the dark voids endless, “The Flora.”

“...” Maki twitched, before saying quietly to Kokichi, “I’m getting ‘assholes’ and visions of weeds from you in that regard, but I don’t really know how to translate that, and I’m a little distracted now. What’s a Flora?”

...the potential of losing Maki to...well, a different version of Maki was...frightening, but her utter non-concern for it helped ease that fear in Kokichi’s heart. And...without losing Maki, her getting old memories...would just make her more of herself. Sometimes there really were things left better forgotten, but in other cases...it was like a harmony of being. Kokichi really hoped it would be that latter case. 

As Bathul continued to explain, Kokichi’s eyes widened, his mind starting to whirl at the implications...or, rather just said right out that...Luminary’s problems were because of the Flora?

That...was something Kokichi needed way more time to process, but for Maki’s sake, he put it to the side. What was one more thing to remember, right?

“The Flora…” Kokichi sighed. “There are a lot of people in the world that...I believe the greater term is magic folk. Beings that show up in fairy tales for us. The Flora are a people like that, plant people, pretty much that...are the primary demographic of Danganronpa.”

The young prince’s expression pinched in, residual anger bleeding through his explanation. “They’re a hivemind, and while they all are individuals...the strongest consciousness among them does influence a lot. Right now that’s Queen Enoshima and...she’s the worst. She’s cruel and thinks all other species are trash… She…”

Kokichi huffed. “The Flora can only reproduce with other species and...the Despair Spores? That’s how they do it. The spores turn other creatures into these beings called seedlings that can give birth to more Flora, but in the process, it makes them lose their minds and…”

He shook his head, Maki likely getting a wave of anger over all sorts of disjointed atrocities that were because of the Flora, now joined by Luminary’s problems. But...then it softened. Something...almost afraid for the first time that conversation. 

Kokichi looked up, worry in his eyes. “...Shuu-chan’s not a seedling anymore. But our daughter is still going to be a Flora…”

Now this, finally, got Maki to turn away from the god, looking in concern at Kokichi, her eyes searching his face, processing rapidly. Where was the danger…

She put her hand on his shoulder, and said softly, “Whatever happens? Whatever needs to be done with my niece… I will not let you face it alone. As soon as I can… whatever choice you find yourself making. I will be there to support you… that said. This god is telling me that returning these memories will make Flora my enemies. Considering we have Flora in the family, if these memories put your daughter in danger? I’ll refuse them on your word. I don’t care about whatever version of me made whatever trade before this. I’ll prioritize who I’m sworn to as I am, now.”

“If I may,” Bathul said, though he waited not even a second, still not used to the polite pauses between thoughts that came instinctively to everyone raised speaking with a mortal tongue, “Your true enemy is Flora, but Flora victimizes Flora. Flora are twisted and made bloated and driven mad by the desires and madness of their queen. This is not Flora balanced, and they cannot sustain this. To win the war against the flora is not to exterminate them. It’s to restore them to their natural state, in which they peacefully co-exist with their fellow species.”

“That is balance. That will restore the natural trade of resources between the species.” Bathul said, staring at them, still wide eyed, something almost… weirdly innocent in his expression, as he said simply, “That is my goal, and the fulfillment of my given purpose.”

...it was an odd sort of feeling. Kokichi certainly felt guilt for wanting Maki to, essentially, deny a part of herself. But there was also...so much comfort, hearing from someone who had literally just learned not only that his daughter was a part of a species that didn’t have the best reputation right now, but that there were other intelligent species besides humans, that...she was still going to stand by them. It was very Maki, but...it was still comforting to hear. 

As was what Bathul was hoping to get out of all of this at the end. 

Kokichi sighed but smiled up at Maki. “The last thing I’m going to allow is for Junko to mess with Miya’s head… I don’t know if this would change in our lifetime...but if it could change in hers? It would...be nice, if Miya could be proud of her species one day. As the world is now, I can’t see anyone announcing themselves...but maybe that’ll be true one day.”

“It’s always your choice, Maki-chan,” he grinned, squeezing the hand that was on his shoulder gently for a moment. “I believe that you’ll make the choice that’s best for you. You’d know that best, after all.”

Maki sighed, running her hand through her hair, giving Bathul a wary look. “...So, accepting will give me memories that will make it easier for me to deal with a species that, if you’ll excuse my language, Kokichi, mind-fucked Shuuichi… and Kaito too, now that I think about it… which, frankly, if I ever learn about this in the waking world on my own, will be something I want to do either way… and I’d risk being over-ridden by my own memories… but you won’t give me the memories all at once. I’ll be able to adjust over a good period of time, and I feel fairly confident that with that sort of advantage, I won’t be over-ridden either way...and even with all those benefits… I still get to request something from a literal God?” She asked, “...Anything?”

“Not anything.” Bathul said, “But what I can provide, and am willing to provide.”

“Will you be honest if you can and are willing?”

“I do not trade through deceit.”

“...Somehow, I believe you.” Maki said, narrowing her eyes, “More the fools me… I’ll admit, even with all the benefits, I’m morbidly curious about what this is all about. A deal with death I’ve made and forgotten, to fight a plant hivemind…that’s a new one for me.”

Idly, Maki bit her thumb again, staring at Bathul… a god of death and trade…

“Could you kill for me?” She asked. Blood eyes intense. Tempted. “Could you kill someone specifically? Or many people?”

“Yes.”

“...is there a limit?”

“Yes.”

“Good. I think I would have been afraid, if you had said no.” Maki said quietly, still chewing her thumb, “...Could I request they die in some specific way?”

“Yes.”

“...” She chewed on her thumb more. Staring out at the view, “...”

“...”

“...Kaito would never know I did it… no one would ever have to know… I could make him fall down the stairs in front of dozens of witnesses and break his neck… just an unfortunate accident… Kaito would never know…” She whispered… her expression… tense.

...Kokichi sighed. Looking out towards the gorgeous view. This was Maki’s trade, her deal. It wasn’t anything to do with him. ...but he hadn’t spoken up last time. 

“...it’s Maki-chan’s choice,” he softly repeated. “Kai-chan would never know. ...but you do know it would devastate him.”

Looking back at his friend, there was certainly something...almost disappointed in his gaze. His belief that this could be done without death...and the new knowledge that this wasn’t even the true battle anyway. “...is he the only person standing in the way of setting everyone free?”

“...no… but it would make things so much easier… and it’d be so satisfying…” Maki said quietly, her expression curiously blank.

“...” Maki stared at nothing for a moment… before her expression suddenly twisted in fury, and she suddenly turned to the rock wall and screamed.

She took her knife, and she stabbed into the wall, slicing it, once, twice, again, again, again, again-

She screamed. It was feral and furious, and with each slice against the rock, a splurt of red gushed out of the wall, red, burning.

“It’s lava.” Alter Ego quickly reassured, leaping onto Kokichi’s shoulder, before saying, “We should back out into the air. Depending on her rules, lava might hurt.”

Bathul watched, curious and concerned, as Maki screamed, slicing over and over into the rock, streams of lava pushing out and dripping out around her, falling down the ledge like waterfall, hissing and steaming as it burned everything it touched, The Templar’s body hovering up a little, letting the lava flow beneath his feet, while Maki stood in it. The end of her dress catching a light, simmering and smoking, but not further catching on fire, her skin turning red around her boots… but she looked down at the heat, breathing heavily, a frustrated, annoyed look on her face as she caught her breath.

“...He’s a Momota. I should have never loved him in the first place. Momota are manipulative. They're cruel. They’re, at their core, only in it for themselves… they’re the enemy… they enslaved me…”

Running a hand over her forehead, she sighed, “... so why do I keep… doing this to myself? Why…”

“...Ngh… he’d be so pathetic about it… all grieving and weepy and worthless… ugh… what a pain.” Maki mumbled, looking frustrated, puffing out her cheeks.

Kokichi didn’t like Byakuya. Especially not from how he’d treated Kaito his whole life, and not how he saw he treated Marigold, or even how he spoke to Kokichi sometimes. As a leader, from the policy they had talked together, while there was some progressive sense the king talked, in most of his economic and social policy everything always looked so short-sighted of him. Maybe with a proper board of admins that Byakuya would actually listen to, he could be a good leader in a different situation but...that’s not where they were. 

But Kokichi didn’t think he deserved to die. Kokichi didn’t think anyone deserved to die, with the exception of wish Tengan had never existed at all, and...something about Queen Enoshima. But Byakuya… He shouldn’t be in a leading position. But he didn’t need to forfeit his life. 

...especially since...without him, Marigold and Kaede would start to fight over control and...even still, Kokichi didn’t trust either of them to be much of a better leader. 

Kokichi gasped softly as Maki screamed, lunging at the wall with her knife, and for a moment his skin paled as he saw red come out of the rock. But thankfully Alter Ego’s warning was quick, and the heat was unmistakable, and Kokichi quickly backed out over the air, thankfully still suspended since Maki wasn’t paying attention to him. 

...red hot fury… Was this how Maki’s rages went in her head?

...he could never deny all the wrongs Kaito’s family had done to Maki. Even with how much he loved his husband, all the good he saw in him, the love he knew Maki felt too...they had still done all those things. Hoarded wealth and acted on selfish impulse, using power they had not gained through trust or respect to hurt everyone they could, enslaving not just Maki, but countless people. 

...they weren’t...good. 

...but Kokichi still believed they didn’t have to die. 

Gently, he spoke out again. “...Byakuya doesn’t have to die to stop being opposed to your goals. You can still choose to go that way. I won’t tell Kai-chan. But there are other options besides that.”

Maki looked warily over at Kokichi, glancing at his feet above the endless gulf, and entirely on impulse, added more ground beneath him, extending the ledge, not liking ot see him hovering over certain death like that. The lava cooled and turned black around her, just steaming, as she considered him.

“...I’ll never be as good as you. Even just trying to be would cause me nothing but disappointment and misery.” She informed him, something soft and sad in her eyes, “I am sorry for that. I wish I was better. If only to cause you less pain, knowing me.”

That said, she turned back to Bathul. “Can you spoil the food reserves in the Luminary Capital?” She asked. Eyes cold. “All of it?”

Bathul considered her, “...not right away.” he said, “But in three days time, yes.”

“The others refuse to go with my plan to threaten this years harvest out of fear that the elites will sacrifice the commoners to starvation to root us out, break morale and turn all the population against us.” Maki said, voice cold. Impassive. “They have a point… he might. Byakuya is capable of cruelty, though I was willing to bet he wouldn’t be willing to lose thousands over the next few months… but if the elite were also depending on the  current harvest? If burning the fields would starve them as well…” 

Maki gripped her hands into fists, “That could be enough. That could cause them to surrender… they’ll either surrender, or we’ll all die…”

...Maki grit her teeth, before calming, “...I’ll be remembered as a maniac. History will spit on me. They’ll wrack my name through the mud, at what I risked… but it could work…”

...she looked sadly at Kokichi. 

“I’m sorry again.”

And then to Bathul, she said, “That’s my trade. Destroy the capital’s food reserves. Whatever it takes. Make it impossible to eat. In exchange, I’ll accept my lost memories.”

Bathul nodded, “It is done.”

And then, there was a pulse of power, a whirlwind of force… and when the wind cleared, they were all in a dark void, the mountain and the scenery gone. Both Temp and Maki collapsed.

...he couldn’t help it. And Maki knew that. 

Kokichi looked on in horror as Maki laid out her terms. Not just an entire city’s reserve of food gone, which on its own just made him sick, but...threatening to starve out the entire country?! There was a cold terror that washed over Kokichi as he contemplated that, an icy blue sheen coloring his whole body. 

...and the horrible thing was...it would work. Byakuya was extending the Indentured Program’s reach to gain more capital for the country, so they could buy food. He was trying to prevent mass starvation. If there was no food in Luminary then...there literally would not be enough contracts to sell. Even the elite would start to starve, and it all would be for nothing. 

Maki was proposing that...Luminary die now, or die later. And if you choose later...then maybe get the chance to turn things around. 

...the elderly, the sick, the people who likely were barely affording food before, small children...were about to suffer unspeakably, while people who had never had to strive in their lives fussed about trying to hold onto their selfish hoard, just to ultimately give up anyway. 

(...Danganronpa made bad trades with Luminary to keep them in debt. To...force the program? But why would they want indentured people if the contracts hadn’t even been sold across borders?)

(...because they had been sold? Because...sometimes, even in Dicea, there were missing persons cases that were never solved. Because...someone who couldn’t fight was easier to make into a seedling?)

(It was a fledgling theory, but...slowly, a picture was starting to form in Kokichi’s head.)

Kokichi turned his head down, not wanting Maki to see his anguished tears...but they weren’t allowed to last long, as he soon found himself in a void. 

“Maki-chan! Temp!”

Kokichi rushed to their sides, not caring about Maki’s rules as he created beds under his friends, keeping them close just so he could check on them both at the same time. Did memory projections have pulses?! He was going to check anyway!

Apparently, whatever kept the sweat on Temp’s forehead or the heavy breaths through Maki’s lungs, also gave them pulses, likely muscle memory, though a muscle memory that translates into whatever was going on in their minds. And both Maki and Temp were overwhelmed and exhausted, Temp dealing with the strain of a power coursing through him that he was in no way used to handling, Maki dealing with…

“Rrrrraaarrrrrr…” Alter Ego growled, his back arched, fur on all ends, eyes slits and ears back as he trembled, staring at something he saw in the dark. “D-don’t w-worry, Kokichi… i-it… i-it…” 

Alter Ego shuddered, wanting to say it couldn’t really hurt them, but something in his very soul, the core of his essence, his entire consciousness… recoiled instinctively. Something primal in him knowing that this wasn’t true… so instead he said, “...i-if it a-attacks, g-g-go back to your consciousness. Don’t look back. I-I-I’ll make certain Temp gets out all right. Y-you can t-t-trust in me.”

Out of the vast darkness, as Maki breathed heavily, hyperventilating, a massive, leather, scalled, red talon stepped out, followed by another. Leading up, and up, and up, to a massive chest, a massive neck, and a long, angled snout, a rumbling, animal noise escaping from that snout that made Alter Ego, who had never had a bowel movement in their own form suddenly want to piss themselves… massive, blood red eyes, staring down at them…

The ancient red dragon looked at Kokichi, and suddenly Maki, on the bed… her breathing evened out. Calming down, as the dragon tilted it’s head curiously. That idle, animal rumble still purring out of its chest in idle, calm breaths.

Kokichi manifested a cool, damp cloth for Temp’s head, knowing that it likely wasn’t actually doing anything, but...it was what he could think to do. Okay...okay, for someone breathing heavily...she was already in a comfortable position, nothing that would collapse or put strain on her chest…

He looked up as Alter Ego growled, almost...bracing himself for whatever would make the cat react like that again, since the last time had been a god, and…

Kokichi stiffened, freezing as he saw what Alter Ego had. That same sort of primal instinct rooting him to the spot. Something big, and dangerous. Something so much more than he’d ever be. A predator in its own world that he was just a speck in…

...those eyes…

...he almost wanted to laugh. He wondered if this counted as him upholding his side of the bargain he’d made with Temp. 

Kokichi looked down to Maki as her breathing evened, and he gently took her hand before looking up at the dragon. “...we all joked about how you could bend the universe to your will but...this is so fitting I’m almost not surprised.”

Looking from the dragon, to the girl, back to the dragon… “...no matter the form or memories...you’re always a storm.”

The beast blinked calmly at this. Something… amused, in it’s gaze…

And then it closed its eyes, lowered its head, and when Maki opened her eyes, it was gone.

Maki was in a bed, and instinctually, the scene around them changed to her bedroom back in Luminary, that she had earned in her a year after her final session of childhood conditioning. It was small, but warm, the bed she and Temp were both now in single and clean and comfortable, with one normal pillow pushed off and tucked into a corner, and one way overly large red pillow, like, just obnoxiously large, taking up the entire head of the bed.

Maki sat up, reaching out gently to touch the pillow, another precious item left behind in the move… she smiled, “Kaito got me this when I was thirteen… I never thought I’d see this again…” looking around her room, no target practice dummies in this room, not needing to do that in Luminary. Just filled with small, sentimental items and necessities, everything warm and familiar and her own.

“...” Temp also opened his eyes, looking…. Increasingly confused as he saw himself in bed with a strange woman, as he said, “Oh… uh… shit, I don’t think this is how you solve conditioning…”

Then he looked at Kokich and Alter Ego and, looking far more worried and confused, he said, “Did you two watch!?”

Maki rolled her eyes, before kicking him out of her bed, ignoring his crash into the ground as she said. “Templar, cat. Get out of my mind. Our business is settled. I’d like to talk to Kokichi in private, while I still have the ability to remember all of this.”

Alter Ego was still staring in Maki in shock… before murmuring, “Well, I mean… I guess you never really know what’s going on with random people in your life… I mean, I’m pretty weird myself…” and other little self-reassuring mumblings. Trying to cope with the fact that this chick was, apparently, a dragon.

...it was cozy. Kokichi was happy that a place like this was in Maki’s memories. He smiled at the pillow, before his cheeks went pink, squeaking out a, “TEMP!”

Facepalming, Kokichi took a breath to ground himself before giving a semi-apologetic look to his friends. “Alter Ego, would you be alright explaining things to Temp? I...think it’d be best if he got to go rest as soon as possible… I’ll let you know when I get back to my mind if you wanna talk.”

And, with that, he turned back to Maki. His friend who...was an ancient dragon, promised to fight a war to bring balance to the Flora, and was currently in a plan to starve out a country to end slavery…

He let out a breath. “...this stuff can get pretty weird, but...I think you’ve really taken the cake, Maki-chan. How are you doing?”

Alter Ego looked at Temp, who looked… a little frazzled, honestly. “Temp might need to sleep, but I’ll come when you call. This was… this was something.” Alter Ego looked somewhat warily at Maki, before saying, “If you need help, call.”

And then he and Temp were gone.

Maki sighed, taking her truly obnoxiously large, full pillow and, dragging it, pulled it on top of herself, hugging it to her body and burying the lower part of her face into it as she sighed again, hugging it tight, taking comfort in it’s familiar presence… too big and ridiculous to travel… it had been so ridiculous, when Kaito had overheard her complaining about her pillow, he had shown up an hour later with this thing… it had lasted years before she had to have it re-stuffed…

...she curled her legs up and buried her face into the pillow and started to cry.

...what had she done… what had she done…

Kokichi almost couldn’t believe it for a moment. He had seen Maki tear up before, even with tears rolling down her face, but...he had never seen her cry. 

Oh, Maki…

Kokichi sat down beside her on her bed and wrapped his arms around her from behind in a reverse hug, only shifting once to start stroking her hair. It...wasn’t okay. But it hadn’t been okay in a long time, and...this path was trying to get to okay. Hopefully...it would. Hopefully people would be able to hold out… Hopefully Byakuya and the elites would realize it soon. 

Hopefully the memories Maki had gotten weren’t things she really wished she’d forgotten. 

“...you’re always going to have a place with us,” Kokichi murmured, finally settling on something. “I know you have a lot to do here...but back in Dicea...you’ll always have a place with us. We love you, Maki-chan. I love you.”

It took Maki a while to catch her breath… but she nodded, pulling herself out of the pillow, looking up, miserable, eyes red and swollen as she said softly, “They… they’ll surrender… they’ll have too… they won’t let me kill everyone. I’m Maki Harukawa. I’m dedicated to the point of insanity. They know that. They know that… Kaede will make them see. Byakuya will make them see… they won’t call my bluff. They won’t make me do it… it’ll be okay… it has to be okay…”

Maki’s breath hitched agan, more terrified, grieving tears falling from her eyes, as she assured herself again, “They’ll surrender… they’ll surrender…”

Maki closed her eyes again, shuddering under the sheer weight of what she was risking… she wouldn’t be able to show this weakness outside. Not to anyone. Any doubt, any regret, or misgivings, would all give them ammunition to call her bluff. To fight back. She would have to stay strong in the fear and horror of her own people too. Would have to sell them on all or nothing. No one would be okay with killing all of Luminary, if the elites don’t surrender to their terms… they would have to feel helpless, to Maki’s decision. Have to convince themselves there was nothing they could do to stop her.

It was the only way… it was the only way…

(... all of this, because Kaito’s tears and look of betrayal would hurt her too much.)

(What a selfish bitch, she had ended up being.)

(All of this, to keep her friend.)

(What a monster, she was.)

Maki nodded, another shuddering breath, as Kokich’s words and comfort washed over her… “I’m sorry.” She said again, her voice tired and sad, “I’m sorry… I wish I was better… I’m sorry… I wish I was home… I wish I was taking care of Tim, and comforting Shuuichi, and excited with Kaito. I wish I was with you. I’m sorry… I’m so sorry… I love you too…”

Then, tears still streaming down her eyes, though her breath was starting to calm, Maki looked behind her, over her shoulder, “...did you pick a name yet?”

“...I know it doesn’t always translate...but if it were me? As a leader...I would surrender. Even if I had a hunch it was a bluff...that’s a risk I can’t take for my people. Byakuya’s horrible, but he doesn’t want everyone to starve...that’s the whole reason he’s doing this.” Really...the moment Bathul set the deal into motion, Byakuya and the elites had lost. With the current harvest lowered in the projection of their recurring famine...there wasn’t going to be enough to eat with just Luminary-grown crops. It was done. 

...if there was anything Kokichi could remember from this night...he needed to somehow convince everyone to produce more food for trade. It wouldn’t be profitable in the slightest, with Luminary’s economy in a stranglehold but...Kokichi couldn’t bear to know that triple the population of Dicea, just the next country over, would starve. There had to be some way to figure it out…

(...the personal wealth of the Momota family and the wealthy elites would be able to pay for trades that would fit the logistics of Dicean farmers. But they wouldn’t distribute food to everyone who needed it, even if there was a miracle and they gave up some of their wealth. There had to be a way…)

[Luckily, there was. Kokichi just wasn’t working on it.]

“I wish you were home too...but when you come back, we’ll welcome you with open arms. Promise.”

Kokichi let go of a breath, feeling Maki’s grief and fear and...self hatred. It was...so heavy… He gave Maki a smile. “We did… Miyako. Shuu-chan...he wanted to name her after my mom. We’ve decorated the nursery; it looks like a meadow filled with flowers. I...I’m working on plans to decorate your room too, so it's nice when you come back. I ordered a birthday present for you so it’ll be there as a surprise, even if I don’t know when your birthday is…”

“Miyako… I like that one. That’s a beautiful name. Little Miyako...I wonder if I should tell Kyoko. Miss Kirigiri. I’d worry more about telling you, but since you won’t remember anyway… look, don’t say anything to anyone, but Miss Kirigiri? She’s who we’ve been getting all our information about attempts to attack and take back the farms… spies sent, people contacting the castle, trying to betray us… she’s been invaluable. I couldn’t believe it. She’s been working with the rebels for years… I can’t wait to tell Shuuichi, but I think she’s trying to keep it from him… if we survive all of this? I really think he’s going to be so proud… Little Miyako Saihara… I bet it’d make her week to know…”

Maki blinked, tears drying, a little sleepy now, as she gave Kokichi a fond, if mildly confused look, “Today’s the twenty-third, isn’t it? Early spring?”

Mai chuckled, leaning against her pillow, reaching out to tuck Kokichi’s hair behind his ear as she said gently, “I’ll be honest, Kokichi, I thought you picked this day to free me on purpose… today’s my birthday.”

She smiled a bit, leaning against her pillow, breath calm...even…

“Thank you for spending my birthday with me, Kokichi.”

Kokichi’s eyes widened but...he didn’t say anything. Neither of them would remember and...there was no way to have it affect the physical world. ...Miss Kirigiri had cut off communication to make sure no one could use Shuuichi as blackmail in the revolution. But, not knowing anything...to Shuuichi, it just...looked as though his mentor had never cared. ...ooooooh boy. That was...going to be a whole other ordeal in the future…

However, Maki recaptured his attention with her sleepy calm and slight amusement, and...honestly he couldn’t believe it. “...it’s really today?”

Kokichi returned that soft smile and sat up a little, just enough to place a kiss on her forehead. “Happy birthday, Maki. It’s my pleasure to be here.”

Alter Ego was waiting, but...Kokichi waited until the scene around them started to blur and fade, Maki slipping into deep sleep, before he quietly left her to her rest. 

-

Alter Ego stepped out of the ether and onto Kokichi’s vanity desk and just went, “Wow.”

Kokichi plopped down on his bed, eyes a little reddened but otherwise dry, and he nodded numbly for a moment. “That’s...not how I was expecting tonight to go. I mean...I really don’t know what Maki-chan would believe in to protect her, but…” He laughed, suddenly shaking his head with eyes just a little too wide. “Of course it would be herself. Just didn’t expect…”

He let out a breath, falling back onto the bed. “...one of my best friends is a dragon.”

Alter Ego leapt out into the air, ad then double jumped, landing on the bed and just, plopped himself onto Kokichi’s stomach, tucking his paws under his own chest as he said, “As your mentor? I’m going to be upfront with you… I didn’t know dragons existed, until ten minutes ago. And, if I’m totally honest? Even knowing the gods were real? Never expected to just… see one casually just… show up. Like…”

Alter Ego’s ear twitched, just as frazzled as Kokichi as he said, “Gods don’t… talk to people?? Or, I guess they do, but like… those are events, ya know? Like, end up in some sort of religious texts, passed down from generation to generation, events.” 

Another hurried, worried twitch of his ears, “Were we just in an event?”

“You never mentioned them, but… I mean, it’s not like I’ve ever asked you to list out every creed of magic folk out there.” Kokichi sighed, gently smoothing his hands down Alter Ego’s back. “It was still… She made me feel like a speck of dust in the universe… If I had thought that dragons didn’t exist then...maybe I would’ve had a harder time remembering that she was still Maki-chan.”

“...but...she is.”

And wasn’t that just something, that it felt like it was consuming his mind when he had spoken to a god that night as well. 

Kokichi let out a breath. “...maybe? But if it was...I don’t think that this one is meant to be passed down. This was...a continuation of an old deal that was meant to only be heard in hushed whispers. I’d made a deal with Temp on Bathul’s behalf to convince a dragon to do...something, but...she decided on her own. So...I guess that’s settled.”

Frowning, Kokichi looked up at the ceiling, just barely able to see the outlines of stars that had once been bright, crisply painted onto the walls. “...I’m not sure if I want to remember. For how nosy I am...I don’t know if there’s anything I could do about it. But...when he said that the Flora are behind Luminary’s problems… I feel like I’m just missing one piece. I...I can make an assumption but...that’s not good enough to understand. There’s too many leaps…”

Swallowing, Kokichi looked back down at Alter Ego, gently rubbing their kitty shoulders. “...I’m sorry. I wish I could protect you...Hiro, better in the physical world.”

Alter Ego leaned into the pet, closing their eyes, purring slightly, “...you don’t have to be sorry? He doesn’t need protection. He’s managing out there… and, what could you do anyway?” The cat asked, opening their eyes, “Sometimes things are hard, and the only thing to do is handle it. We’ve talked about that before… all that Hiro can do is handle the circumstances as best as he can, with the people around us… him. Us.” Alter Ego shrugged, “You know what I mean. It’s not your responsibility.”

Laying their head down on their paw, tail flicking, they said after a moment, “I don’t know if it matters to me or not, who’s responsible for Luminary’s trouble. Powerful people in the country, powerful people outside the country… or even if it was all just… a mistake and not even deliberate at all? I don’t know if the difference changes anything for me. I still have to handle the consequences for all that. Knowing the source just… changes the vague place in the wind I’m spitting towards, I guess.” the cat shrugged, “Maybe that’s different for someone in a different position than me… him… us. But as a street fortune teller? What difference does it make, who did it…”

Kokichi nodded softly. Really, everything his mentor was saying made sense...and was probably the healthiest way to go about things. It kind of reminded him of Shuuichi’s mindset, if less self-deprecating. 

...but he and Maki had understood each other for a reason on this kind of stuff. 

“...I know. I guess I just wish I could help you manage it more easily since...it’s about to get a lot harder.”

“...and I know that logically there’s nothing I can actually do. Apparently, that’s Maki-chan’s fight now. Back when I thought it was just because of internal politics, it was still only Maki-chan’s fight, and my misunderstanding hurt us both.” His eyes went back to the ceiling though his hands never stilled on Alter Ego. “...but when I see a problem...I can’t help thinking about how to solve it. I know that kind of thinking gives my family a lot of grief...they wish I could just calm down. I wish I could just calm down sometimes. If I could limit it to just my work in Dicea...I mean, that’s actually my job. That’s my purpose as a leader. But ever since I met Kai-chan, Maki-chan, and Shuu-chan…”

He sighed exasperatedly, rolling his eyes at himself. “Now I’m thinking all the time about how to fix issues in Luminary, and now in Danganronpa… It’s too much for me, I know. But...some thoughts are harder to silence than others.”

“Ah, right… the food thing…” Alter Ego now looked a little uncomfortable, but sighed, “I don’t… or, Hiro doesn’t live in the capital. He lives in a coast town named Agniratha, near the ports. We do… he does readings and such for sailors and merchants. Lots of Kimigashine people around, Novoselics, Ronpans… not as much Panem’s as we used to get… it’s funny. We’re always hearing famines this, crops that, but as a port town? We never run out of food, and even when the famine comes, port towns should likely be entirely fine… though, if the Capital is about to run out of food in three days… they’re probably going to try to collect food from the rest of the country to make up the deficit...hmmm… maybe we should warn people around us to hide some of their stock, in case the guards come and start confiscating food… if anyone asks how we knew, well, Hiro is a fortune teller…”

“...that really will probably be a big deal. It’s hard to conceptualize. What happens when a city of hundreds of thousands of people, all just suddenly… don’t have any food available? And the farms are all seized? How do you replace that much food in time…” Alter Ego shuddered a little before admitting, “You’re right… this will probably spread far enough to affect us. But… we’ll still handle it. Hiro’s lucky. He knows it’s coming.”

Considering Kokichi’s concern… “I know tonights already been busy, so feel free to tell him no if you’re just not up to it, but Hiro’s hoping he can make you feel a bit better if he can get a chance to talk to you as himself.” Alter Ego rubbed the top of their head against Kokichi’s palm, and asked, “You up to spending some time with Hiro? He’s a bit of a doof, but he means well, and I think he’s worried about you…”

Kokichi let out a slow sigh. That was a relief… It was Maki’s decision, but...just like when she had been tempted with killing Byakuya, Kokichi was still there. If he was condemning his friend to starvation...it hadn’t been his choice, but it still felt horrible. The lack of reserves in the capital would undoubtedly affect the whole country, but...if Hiro lived in a port city? Which Kokichi knew tended to do very well in Luminary… And with the knowledge that this was coming...he could prepare himself and his loved ones. And hopefully they could ride this out alright. 

Smiling down at Alter Ego giving his hand a nuzzle, Kokichi sat up a little, though he kept an arm around his mentor to not displace them. “I’m kind of considering Saturdays rest days, even if I’m not the one up in our rotation. I still have more than enough pep to talk with Hiro...but even if I’m still worried about everyone in the capital...it is a relief to know that he’s distanced from all of that.”

Alter Ego thumped his head into Kokich’s stomach while the prince sat up, still just getting in his nuzzles-- it had been a stressful last hour for both of them-- before musing. “You’ve never talked one on one with Hiro before, have you… just uh… just try not to judge me for him. He’s a little… ‘spacy’. Like I said, he means well.”

With one last affectionate nuzzle, Alter Ego sighed, blipped out--

--and because Hiro hadn’t been thinking about it, he had just stayed exactly where he was as the other three left, and still sitting in his lap, he looked mildly surprised down at Kokichi and, after a moment, asked, “Wow… dude, aren’t I heavy? How are you managing this?”

Hiro was only slightly shorter than Kaito, with a similar build, though his build was less ‘exercise’ and more just ‘born with a heavy dose of testosterone’, stubble on his tanned dark skin, and with, just, wildly curly hair, fro-ing up into every direction.

And yes.

He was heavy.

“Ooph!”

In his mind, Kokichi wasn’t limited to the normal capabilities of his body, and even less so since he had begun learning mastery over his own mind from Alter Ego. However...Kokichi had never been a particularly relaxed person, and the past months of stress had certainly taken their toll on him. 

Kokichi had cradled his husband plenty of times in the past, but he’d never held Kaito directly in his lap. And after this experience, of being absolutely crushed by Hiro, he likely would never offer it. 

Wheezing slightly, it was all Kokichi could do to brace himself on his bed. “Pl-hease get h’off me.”

“H’oh, shit, yeah, man, on it.” Hiro laughed, fumbling a bit before getting to the side of Kokichi, giving the poor, distracted smaller man an apologetic pat on the back as he said, “Geez, my bad. Shoulda landed somewhere else, wasn’t thinking about it. You good, little dude?”

Kokichi sucked in a breath once Hiro got off him, nodding a bit at his question. “Yeah...yeah, I’m good.” He chuckled lightly, giving Hiro a teasing look. “If you were worried about me, then I dunno if squishing me into paste under your giant body was the right call there.”

“I dunno, man, that shits works for Alter Ego. Mind you, dude’s like three pounds and a bundle of fur… well, hey, I’m halfway there!” Hiro chuckled, running his hand a little bit through his afro, his other hand on the stubble on his chin, “Just gotta get a little more furry, and I’ll be as petable as that guy is in no time… mind ya, I’m not much into being pet on by my fellow bro’s. Not my thing.” Hiro admitted, shrugging, before frowning, “No offense, little man. I’m sure if I was more inclined, I’d be totally down to be pet by ya! You’re a cool guy, ya know?”

Kokichi snorted. “I see how it is. No comfortable affection here, I gotcha. Though, in honesty I think Alter Ego’s size is more than a write off, at least when it comes to lap time. My partners enjoy my adoring, but not even they get lap time--I kinda think I’d break something if they tried.”

He smiled slightly at being called a cool guy, and he gave Hiro an affectionate look, though he respected the man’s space preferences. “This is the first time we’ve gotten to talk one-on-one, but you’ve always been cool to me too. Spacy’s far from the worst thing to be, and I’ve always found your bravery admirable.”

“And, uh…” Kokichi laughed sheepishly, looking away for a moment. “Sorry for messing with your sleep and...sometimes your days so often. Sometimes what time it is kinda gets away from me, especially if I’m taking a nap in the middle of the day.”

“Ah, yeah, that’s alright, little man. I mean, my sleep’s schedule’s been shot ever since Alter Ego was born, anyway. Little puffball always wants to get up and run around and explore, and, like, what am I gonna do? Tell ‘em no? Guy’s, like, eight months old! Keeping him all cooped up in my head’s probably bad for his development or some sht. ‘S what my mom said, anyway.”

Hiro shook his head, looking concerned and tired as he said, “And, I ain’t all that brave. I mean, it’s super cool to be called that, that’s a first. But little AE’s… well, he’s got a skewed perspective of me. Letting Chihiro all up and take refuge in my head was the first thing AE ever saw, and it was probably the ‘bravest’ thing ‘ve ever done… and, well, it’s been a lot of living up to that ever since… life’s a trip, little brah, seriously. Life’s a trip…”

Hiro pouted, closing his eyes, a little lost in his head… before he suddenly opened them up and said, “Oh, right! That’s what I’m out here for! Cause you, my guy, are all talking about not wanting to remember shit and all intrusive thoughts and jazz… did ya mean that, little broski?” Hiro asked, giving Kokichi a serious, concerned look, “You got shit you’d rather be forgetting, from all this? Cause, honestly, super fair. And maybe something I can actually… help ya with?”

It was weird to think of Alter Ego like that, since from what Kokichi had learned about Hiro, Chihiro, Mondo, and Taka, they were all older than him, but...the being Alter Ego? Hadn’t even lived as themself for a full year yet. Hadn’t been a year since…

Kokichi looked moderately surprised, hearing that, apparently, Hiro had told his mom about all this. (He told family and...it was okay?) And...he was really selling himself short. Sure, Hiro was kind of in the trenches since he became part of Alter Ego, but...whenever all four of them came out to solve a problem? Of course Hiro had been scared or worried, but he had never backed down. Had volunteered despite that fear, and to Kokichi...he saw that as a shining bit of bravery. Chihiro was willing to do whatever he could to help someone, and Hiro was willing to put his hand in despite seeing the situation and consequences for as real as they were, and those two traits had made it into Alter Ego, and they were things Kokichi loved about his friends. 

But...he kind of felt like they’d be going in a circle if he said all that, so he hoped Hiro could feel it from him. 

And for the actual topic...Kokichi sighed, giving the man a soft look. “...some things would be a lot easier if I didn’t know. If I never remembered. I think...I’m starting to think I’m going a little crazy, because I can’t remember the reasoning behind things…”

“...but it’s not fair for anyone to keep myself from remembering, more than what my mind’s already doing.” He sighed again, running a hand through his hair. “Especially with Maki-chan getting her dragon memories back, and Shuu-chan being clued in by Temp eventually, and Miya...and I can’t keep Kai-chan in the dark forever. He hates it when we keep big secrets like this…” Kokichi muttered, his voice going soft, remembering the anguish in his husband, and never wanting to be the source of that again. 

“It would be so much easier if I could keep all that stuff to when I’m asleep. But knowing about gods and magic folk, knowing the truth about my daughter, knowing what happened to the Luminary party, and getting a clue for why Luminary is the way it is…” Kokichi balled his fists in his hands. “...I promised myself I wouldn’t hide when things got hard anymore.”

He looked back up at Hiro, smiling gratefully. “Believe me, I’d love to take you up on that...but I can’t. I’m just...not the kind of person that can shut their eyes to the world anymore.”

Hiro sighed, crossing his arms and his legs, nodding his head, hair bouncing lightly, as he said, “Yeah, yeah, I get it… man, all that’s heavy… well, look, little man, if you ever change your mind? You can reach out to me. I can’t really do it, but my ma’s been dabbling in witchcraft ever since we worked out my fortunes weren’t entirely bullshit every time, and, she’s been experimenting with this one type of magic… like, when she sells it, it’s usually to people trying to forget something traumatic that happened to them? And they don’t really forget, it just seems like it gets all… like vague and distant in their head. Like they remember it happening to someone else…” 

Hiro grinned, pointing a thumb at himself and giving Kokichi a wink as he said, “Look, if you ever need that? Ask Hiro, I’ll give ya the hookup! I can probably even get you a discount, being her kid and everything!...Maybe, we’ll see, my moms’ kinda strict about the money.” Hiro admitted, shrugging and laughing sheepishly.

“Alright, well, if you’re sure… oh…” Looking curiously at Kokichi, Hiro said, “Since I’m out here stretching anyway, what if I offered you my services? Free of charge, friend in a whole different country discount! I could give you a reading on any questions you have, ask the universe and stuff… my readings are 100% accurate, 30% percent of the time! If there’s anything in the future you’re particularly worried about? I gotcha!”

Kokichi’s eyes widened, but...he supposed that answered some of the questions regarding why Hiro had told his mom about all the empath stuff. Alter Ego had said it could be hereditary… But even more than that, if Hiro’s mom could do magic? And they were already trying to lay low about the demon stuff… He didn’t care what Hiro said--he was incredibly brave. 

Smiling, Kokichi nodded. “I’ll keep it in mind...while I can remember it, anyway. And I’m not really sure how I’d manage to pay you since...well. It’s not like I can grab my actual purse like this. But if I found a secure way to do it, and I’d remember in the physical world...don’t worry about the discount. I’d pay fairly for a fair job.”

...but getting a free, 30% accurate tip about the future...that was real tempting… 

There were things that he probably didn’t want to know. Any confirmation about Maki coming home--she would--and...stuff about Shuuichi’s surgery going well would only stress him out. But...there was one thing. His response either way would be...more or less the same. 

Chewing on his lip for a moment, Kokichi gave Hiro a bashful look. “...would...would it be possible to see if Miya’s going to be an Empath? She’s going to be a Flora, so I’m going to protect her that way no matter what, but...I dunno. I think...it would be helpful to get a hint about if I should prepare for more…”

“Oh, yeah, that’s a super good question. Telepath stuff is one thing, Empaths are just a whoooole different ballgame. It’s kinda wild, what you guys are capable of.” Hiro mused, before nodding vigorously. “Hell yeah! Let’s do it!”

“Okay, we’re gonna do something a little weird… but, hell, look at that? ‘M teaching you some empath stuff by myself! Man, I’m a useful friend!” Hiro bragged, before saying to Kokichi, “Okay, wait here for a second, alright? I’m gonna have Alter Ego take me back to my mind and wake my ass up, and in, like, five minutes? Jump to my mind, okay? Five minutes! Meet ya there!”

“Guys?” Hiro called, looking up vaguely at the air, “Get back here, we need Alter Ego!”

And then Hiro was gone.

Kokichi laughed softly, though the gratitude in his expression was sincere and never wavered. Hiro, Chihiro, Mondo, and Taka...what such wildly different, amazing people. Along with Alter Ego themself...he was incredibly lucky to be able to call them friends. ...one day he hoped he could express that friendship to others too. And...maybe it wouldn’t be as daunting to tell Kaito. 

Getting up from his bed, Kokichi stretched. Five minutes… He could check on Chibi Kaito and Chibi Kokichi, make sure Chibi Kokichi was sticking around alright--he’d needed to re-make him a few times, his concentration lapsing--see how they were doing…

Chibi Kaito was doing some weird shit with planets right now.

He tried to keep himself busy, whenever Big Kokichi was gone and Chibi Kokichi… stopped… not wanting to let himself get antsy, fussing around in the part of Big Kokichi’s mind he played around in. He understood why Chibi Kokichi stopped, sometimes. Chibi Kokichi wasn’t as developed as he himself was, being the product of not only two different memories merged, but the sustained power of two different empaths as well. Chibi Kokichi was a memory, and Chibi Kaito was a, well, a sort of defense. Just more solid, than his little memory husband.

...that didn’t mean Chibi Kaito didn’t miss him terribly, when he was gone.

But! Big Kokichi would be back at some point! And he’d bring Chibi Kokichi back when he did! So, Chibi Kaito just had to stay busy! And busy today was spinning the planets around the sun! 

It had taken a little doing-- he had had to pull one of the stars until it was big enough to be considered a sun, first, and now Chibi Kaito, after a while of pulling and tugging and stretching, was the proud owner of a sun almost as big as he himself was! It was warm! He loved it! 

After that, it was grabbing a comet and running from planet to planet, using the comet to push the planets to the sun, and he had gotten his hands on five of them so far, carefully letting them caught up in the small sun’s gravitational pole, spacing them out so they wouldn’t run into each other…

Then, carefully, he started to push them, one planet after another, at first gently, but then circling around them, tapping them all harder, increasing their speed, annnnnd-

Ｏ(≧∇≦)Ｏ

o(≧∇≦o)

(o≧∇≦)o

Still pumping his fists and dancing in victory, Chibi Kaito didn’t notice Big Kokichi, as he just celebrated the evenly, quickly spinning disks of planets he had made around the sun, his experiment a success!!

...his husband had made a working solar system…

Kokichi looked on in adoration, just...amazed with what Chibi Kaito had done. He was glad he was able to entertain himself, but...this was really something. Left to his own devices, Kaito really could come up with amazing things. 

Not sensing Chibi Kokichi anywhere--and he doubted he’d be seeing Chibi Kaito without him if he was still there--Kokichi quietly summoned the little doll-like version of himself, watching his little simple eyes widen at the display. With a nod between them, Kokichi gently tossed Chibi Kokichi out into space, sent on a trajectory towards Chibi Kaito. 

A rather distinct two-part pattern of bell noises came from Chibi Kokichi as he flew, holding his arms out towards his similarly sized husband. 

…’Kichi?

‘Kichi!!

 (′ʘ⌄ʘ‵)

(̂ ˃̥̥̥ ˑ̫ ˂̥̥̥ )̂

ˉ̶̡̭̭ ( ´͈ ᗨ `͈ ) ˉ̶̡̭̭

Chibi Kaito was quick to catch his little husband, the two falling backwards and into the gravitational pull the other planets had been caught in, Chibi Kaito covering his husband in incredibly pleased, eager kisses as the two gently spun around his sun. They exchanged excited bell sounds, Kaito excited to tell Kokichi about everything he had done while Kokichi was ‘away’ this time, before he looked around, spotting Big Kokichi and giving him an excited wave! Look! Big Kokichi, look! Check out his neat little solar system thing! Cool, right!? Thanks for bringing Chibi Kokichi back!!!

That was what Chibi Kaito ‘said’, though it was uncertain how much of that got through, it all just chirpy, happy bell sounds, keeping a firm, steadying arm around his husbands waist, while they went around the orbit.

Kokichi giggled, happy to see the two together. If this was what he and Kaito looked like...it was just...incredibly precious. He didn’t see how anyone could see it other than total love. 

He waved back at Chibi Kaito, giving the solar system another impressed look. “You’ve been doing some real cool stuff up here! I can’t stay for too long, but I’m glad I got to see all this.”

Technically, Chibi Kaito should know everything he knew...but he and Chibi Kokichi looked so sweet together. Maybe...Chibi Kokichi could tell him about his trip to Maki once the two got settled together. It was still him so...this wasn’t hiding.

Chibi Kaito knew Big Kokichi was a busy guy-- and, if he allowed himself to ‘absorb’, as Maki had called it, he’d know busy with what-- but he liked being able to talk to any version of his husband, and he didn’t tend to absorb unless Kokichi needed something from him, and Chibi Kaito needed to be up to date with what was going on. Still, whatever Kokichi was busy with, Kaito understood…

But he still pouted a little bit. 

He was going to get that Big Kokichi love someday.

He just needed a real chance to woo his husband! His last few attempts had… not gone well! He got the distinct impression Kokichi might think he was a tad too… ‘cute’. And ‘small’. And, maybe, a little too ‘imaginary’. 

And sure, all of these things were true! 

But Kaito was still going to try.

Still, he gave Kokichi an energetic wave goodbye, before turning to Chibi Kokichi, giving him another happy kiss before asking him if he wanted to try to make a planet snowman with him…

Back in the waking world, Hiro had set up his crystal ball, and was just waiting... Keeping his mind open, his defenses aware… happily sipping on some tea, laced with a dash of rum, as he waited in his kitchen/Fortune Telling Den… all the curtains drawn, the candles lit, the lantern on, the door triple locked and the sign outside of his door for ‘Illuminating Life Advice’ turned to CLOSED, because sometimes sailors drunk and on a port visit couldn’t understand why a fortune teller might be closed at 2am and could be somewhat… insistent.

Another sip of his special tea… maybe he should get the tarot cards out too? Kokichi might get a kick out of them…

Double checking with the calendar Alter Ego had made him--five minutes, yupp--Kokichi waved Chibi Kaito and Chibi Kokichi goodbye and...well, Hiro had said his mind. Kokichi had only gone to Alter Ego before...but it should be easy enough. Close enough, at least. 

Concentrating for another moment than he would’ve otherwise, Kokichi created a portal and...hoped it was to Hiro specifically, and not Alter Ego. 

Hiro winced, feeling Kokichi show up at his lounge, taking a deep breath…

It was pretty simple, but Hiro had liked it well enough, what Chihiro had taught him. And in his mind, Kokichi, who was standing in an alley way that seemed to just keep going and going, the sounds of a party and laughter somewhere, either behind him or in front of him, echoing in the night sky above him… and from that same sky, a slightly luminescent, blue butterfly flew down, and landed on Kokichi’s nose, before taking off again.

Assuming Kokichi would follow, the butterfly led him through Hiro’s lounge, and to Hiro’s surface thoughts, and from there, Hiro thought to ‘himself’, “Okay, little man, now as an empath, your impulse is to always go down, deeper into the consciousness. But for this, I want you to seek out surface me, and really push. Mentally, and physically, you have to get as close as possible to surface me…”

Kokichi looked around in interest, actually managing to recognize the lobby for what it was for once. This was...a pretty cool one, honestly. Not really trying to hide what it was, but in that, giving Hiro quite a bit of control… And control he was adept at exerting, it seemed. 

Following the butterfly with a soft giggle, Kokichi was a little startled to hear Hiro’s thoughts directed at him--even if they had planned all this--and...hm. Seek out the surface…

...be obvious. No hiding from people in their thoughts, you’re welcomed here. Rise to the top and… He could still sense Hiro...but…

...okay, do it as a metaphor. You’ve been someone else before, even if it wasn’t you that did it. 

Faintly, Kokichi could see a silhouette of Hiro just in front of him. 

Push.

Hiro grinned from his chair, gesturing to the empty seat across the table from him. “You can take a seat in that, if you want. Or, you can conjure an image up of a chair, if the fact that you can’t actually physically manipulate the objects in this room freaks you out any, little man. Either way, it’s all good with me. Welcome to my home!”

Everything was just a little...wrong. This was Hiro’s home, so it was all clear, but even with his familiarity...things were just slightly at the wrong angle from where Kokichi was “standing”. 

But, honestly, that was nitpicking at the finest details, and Kokichi was...amazed to find himself in someone’s home…

Trying to remember Luminary manners, Kokichi bowed slightly before...settling into the seat across from Hiro. “Thank you for inviting me. This is...incredible. I never even imagined something like this would be possible…”

“It’s suuuuuper hard with an unwilling host, and there’s always that impulse to be, uh, no, no, no, that feels wrong, kick that out.” Hiro chuckled, grinning wide, still incredibly pleased that he had gotten to teach Kokichi some cool empath shit on his own-- hell yeah! Who was a doof now!? “But since I knew you were coming and I know how to control my brain impulses? You’ve got what I call ‘ghost privileges’! Or, well, astro-projections is probably a more accurate term.” Hiro shrugged, clearly not bothered one way or another. 

“ But, yeah, like I said, you empath types are crazy OP. It’s really wild, what access to the mind leads to a guy being capable of. Like, wow.” Hiro said, adjusting his crystal ball, before snickering, “Maybe not ‘I’m a dragon and making deals with gods’ crazy, but still pretty crazy.”

“Now!” Hiro shouted, clapping his hands together and rubbing them together, peering at his crystal ball, “I needed ya to come here because I needed my tools, man! I mean, I can do the fortune telling stuff without it, but without a focus object I’m familiar with? Shits gets all weird and vague and lost in my head before I can articulate it, ya know? Even doing it in your mind, it’d have looked like more a loopy dream than anything else. Need my focus objects! In this case, this! My super duper excellent crystal ball!” Hiro displayed, running his hand over the clear, smoothed round hunk of what was more likely glass than anything else. “You ready? Still feel connected to my plane of existence? Feeling steady?”

Kokichi snickered. “I kinda like ghost privileges. My husband would throw a fit. I doubt it, since death is an important cycle, but if ghosts turned out to be real? I think I’d have to start thinking of ways to fight the ‘monster under the bed’ for more than just my daughter.”

Looking over the crystal ball--so, something like that was actually helpful? He always thought it was a hoaky trope--Kokichi took a ‘breath’ and nodded. “I think so, yeah… Like you said, you’ve mastered your impulses so...I’m not feeling like you’re trying to push me away. I think I’m...here.”

It was only thirty percent. But...Kokichi would take any hint Hiro would manage to get. If he just needed to learn how to teach Miya how to seclude her mind from the hivemind, or...if he was going to need to pass on everything he’d learned from Alter Ego onto his daughter too. If...he needed to impress even earlier that...people weren’t things. They weren’t tools. And even if they did things you disagreed with...you had no right to control them. You could debate, you could even fight, but you couldn’t control them. The only person you were entitled to know fully, to control, was yourself.

“Alright… now, my fortune telling is…” Hiro hummed a bit, a small, pleased smile, in his element, as he focused on the ball… the room around them getting darker, darker, while the candles around them got dimmer and dimmer… if you were a skeptic, you could assume this was a trick with the draft in the room, purposefully dimming the room a bit as the fire struggled against the draft.

But that wasn’t what was happening.

Hiro was, in the opposite way that it felt when an Empath let out a burst of power, like a small, pressure wave of explosion, was drawing pressure inward. Pulling the strands of the universe around him towards himself with the elaborate, circular motions of his hands, the energy collecting and focusing on the crystal ball around his twisting fingers and smooth, circular gestures. That was why the crystal ball was a favored focus object for people like him: the ball shape naturally lent itself to the orb like motions of collecting the energy.

As he started to draw in the nergy, he continued to explain, eyes closed, his whole body swaying a bit as he fell into the motion, “is… not necessarily seeing… the future. I don’t...know if the future… exists like that, ya know? Ya hear rumors about the past being… physical… people able to visit it, manipulate it, rewind it... But those could easily just be stories. Never heard it proven. But the future? I don’t think so, personally…”

Hiro took a breath, his closed eyes fluttering rapidly, eyes looking around rapidly in his own darkness, a strange chill filling the air as he said, his voice calmer… slower… “So… what I do… is I reach out to… the physical of the… now… and ask… I guess you could say… everything. All that… is… and ask for the…” another breath. This breath came out physical, like a breath of chilled steam on a frozen day, the room darker, “...the everythings… best… guess… based on what… everything… knows…”

Hiro’s face suddenly relaxed. Entirely, completely sirene. As he said, voice calm and happy and weirdly far away, as if he was whispering loudly, trying to project to the back of a theater while keeping the appearance of speaking softly, “...hey… hey… Miyako Saihara… Kokichi’s baby girl… she looking to be an Empath?”

Another long breath… and then, Hiro opened his eyes, and with that same serene peace, he peered into the crystal ball, trying to decipher what he could see in the images that swirled inside.

“...I see… a happy little girl, with a cute little cowlick thing in her hair… no shoes, running around the Dicea castle...hmmmm…” Hiro watched patiently, “Theres a… teenager, with orange hair, sleeping with a dog under a tree… she’s disappointed they’re sleeping. She wants to play… so she sits down next to them on the tree and closes her eyes… and now she’s playing catch with the dog…”

Humming a bit, Hiro said, “The universe thinks there’s a chance this will happen, someday… my interpretation? She’ll be an empath, but a really weak one. Not able to do much more than visit sleeping peoples dreams. I think that’s why the universe showed me that… because that’s the extent of what she’ll be able to do.”

Hiro sighed, relaxing, letting the pull go a little… “Anything else, little man? That work for ya?”

While he didn’t really need to breathe, Kokichi felt himself holding his breath as...everything started to...squeeze in. Everything pulling into a center point at Hiro, at his hands pulling it all in like someone twirling together a ball of cotton candy on a cone. It was...one of the weirdest feelings Kokichi had ever felt, and he’d been face-to-face with a dragon just an hour ago. 

But as that universe-cotton candy started to form into an image...Kokichi smiled. A cute cowlick like Shuuichi...not a nudist, like Kaito feared, but an aversion to shoes like himself. A ginger teen sleeping under a tree with a dog. “That’s Tim and Chase, no doubt…” he murmured. 

Okay...there wasn’t too much harm in nudging Chase to wake up and play...but he’d still have to talk to her about using even limited abilities for personal gain…

Kokichi sighed, nodding a bit. “Okay… I’ll be on the lookout for her abilities developing. I…” He shook his head, giving Hiro a grin. “That’s amazing, Hiro, thank you. My little girl’s really gonna be out there…”

Hiro sighed, letting go of the rest of the collection, the light returning to the room as the fire of his candles got stronger, the room getting warmer. “Yeah she is!” He suddenly shouted, grinning triumphantly, giving Kokichi a thumbs up, “I think the version I saw of her was maybe four or five? And she seems like a cute, energetic kid! A cute little energetic empath kid! Congratulations, dude!”

Kokichi grinned, feeling light with love. Of course he wouldn’t ever want to think the worst, but...having Hiro see her at four or five, happy and running around and close enough with Tim to regularly play with him… He had this kind of thought maybe twice a day these days, but he couldn’t wait to meet her. And it would only be her other dads wanting baby time that would have him relinquish her from his arms.

And the fact that he wasn’t very good at stress training, but...he was going to pull through for his daughter. Kokichi wanted to delay the day he couldn’t pick her up anymore as far as he could. 

Even if he wouldn’t remember in the day, if he couldn’t tell Kaito and Shuuichi...it was still a wonderful thing to know. 

“Thank you,” Kokichi murmured again, feeling happy and a little overcome. “But...it’s been a long night for both of us. Want me to get out your hair so you can get some sleep tonight?”

Hiro, almost as if Kokichi’s suggestion reminded him he was tired, suddenly gave an exaggerated yawn, rubbing his palm over his eyes as he said, “Yeah, probs best, my guy. Though, you keep in mind my mad psychic skills! You need any questions potentially answered by the universe? I’m your dude.” Hiro promised, giving him a grin, “You just ask, I gotcha.”

Kokichi nodded, giving Hiro a fond grin. “I appreciate it. And...even if you’re doing alright, please let me know if there’s anything I can do for you. Think of it as an open offer, alright?”

With a wave, Kokichi let himself fade away, returning to his own consciousness for the rest of the night. 

-

...sniffle. 

Gasp. 

Kokichi shuddered, what felt like a long dream already fading from his mind, but some of the feelings lingering. Curling into himself, he hid his face against Shuuichi’s shoulder, trying to keep his tears silent. 

Shuuichi blinked sleepily, jostled by the small vibrations of his partner shuddering against his shoulder, a small, wet spot starting to develop against his pajama shirt. What was…

Shuuichi opened his eyes, sighing, reaching up and gently rubbing up and down Kokichi’s arm as he said, voice still slightly slurred by sleep, “...Kokichi?”

Kokichi shook his head slightly, an apology bubbling in his throat for waking his boyfriend up, but it got stuck, just leading to another shuddered breath. He didn’t want to do this… He’d been working on trying to find ways to express his emotions more healthily, to not freak out on his loved ones. But right now...that feeling welling in his chest, unable to be solved as it was from the ever-blurry image of a dream, filled Kokichi to his brim, and he couldn’t stop it. 

Despite himself, Kokichi whispered into Shuuichi’s shoulder, his tears shaking his words. “I-I miss Maki…”

...Shuchi laughed gently.

Shifting his body, laying more on his side and pulling Kokichi into a hug, he sighed softly. “Yeah? Yeah...I miss her too.” He said, staring sleepily into the dark, “Sometimes… sometimes a lot. But pretty much always a little…”

“Why?” Shuuichi asked quietly, closing his eyes as he laid against his pillow, still holding Kokichi, “It’s late, Kokichi… were you up thinking about her? Just have a bad dream?”

Kokichi sniffled into his boyfriend’s chest, clinging closely to him. For all that it was fading away from him now, Kokichi shook his head with assurance. “Not a bad d-dream…”

“...I think we were camping? O-or something...staying on the side of a volcano… And, and Maki and I left for a little bit...she w-wanted to show me something, like when we were camping before.” Kokichi swallowed back a sob, gasping against Shuuichi’s neck as he tried to steady himself. “There was this outcropping, and...and she showed me the view… I don’t remember, but it was beautiful… And we just...l-looked out at it and talked… I-I miss her so much…!”

Kokichi was mostly quiet, but as his rambling went on, he got louder, and louder, his voice choked with tears…

Kaito went from dead asleep, laid out on the other side of the bed, burying his face into his elbow, to sitting literally straight up, eyes wide, shoulders tense, eyes darting around the room in just… total paranoid alertness, his hand checking under his pillow purely on instinct, looking for a weapon that wasn’t going to be there…

And he blinked in confusion, a distinct lack of emergency, despite emergency sounds happening… “Ngh?” Kaito grunted.

“We’re up and sad, Kaito.” Shuuichi explained sleepily, his eyes briefly opening to see Kaito sitting up, looking confused, before closing his eyes again, “Come join us.”

“Oh… kay.” Kaito murmured, running his hand over his face, before shifting closer to them, leaning against the headboard, before laying his hand on Kokichi’s head, running his fingers through his hair. “...’y we sad?”

Kokichi cringed in on himself, guilty about waking Kaito up now too. But...it was the middle of the night, he was tired and overwhelmed with wistfulness, and he just...needed to express some of that before he could pull himself together and keep going. “Had a dream about Maki-chan, a-and I...I miss her…”

He sniffled, reaching up to lay his hand on Kaito’s though he didn’t uncurl away from Shuuichi any. “...’m sorry for waking you up…”

“Don’t be sorry, don’t be sorry.” Kaito murmured, still shifting his fingers lightly against Kokichi’s scalp, not enough to dislodge his husband's hand, just still trying to give him soothing, light scratches. “Worse reasons to be sad in the middle of the night than missing someone… was it a nice dream?”

“They were camping.” Shuuichi said, smiling softly. “On the side of a volcano.”

“That sounds fun.” Kaito admitted. “Maki would drag my husband to go camping on the side of a volcano. Mmmm… I mean, I guess if we ever come across a volcano, I’m… like, kind of okay with it… I’m sure she wouldn’t let anything happen to you…”

“Miyako’s not camping on the side of a volcano until she’s forty years old and ready to die.” Shuuichi murmured.

“At forty? She’s only just settled into living at forty, why is that when we let her go camping in dangerous places!?”

“By the time she’s forty, I’m gonna be too old and decrepit to stop her.” Shuuichi sighed. “So she gets to camp wherever she wants.”

“...Maybe Maki will come home soon.” Kaito said quietly.

“Any news on the rebels?” Shuuichi asked, “You’ve talked to Byakuya recently, haven't you? What does he have to say?”

“...” Kaito didn’t say anything for a bit, before saying, “I don’t know. I don’t ask him about stuff like that… and he doesn’t really talk about it to me. We… he hasn’t brought up Maki at all, since she arrived at the capital for the kids...”

“Dormant volcanoes are fine...practically just m-mountains at that point. There are a few in, in the west range that are dormant volcanoes…” Kokichi huffed something almost like a laugh, his partners’ banter wonderful as always of pulling him out of his head. He nudged his nose against Shuuichi’s shoulder, somewhat hushing him. “And shush… Mid-sixties isn’t that old… Shuu-chan’s gonna be fine enough to tut at all the wild places Miya’s gonna wanna go.”

...he wanted Maki to return soon. For being able to see her again, of course, but also...that would mean that the program was shut down. Her return would mark a lot of good happening in the world...at least in his point of view. 

Shuddering more gently this time, Kokichi sniffed, trying to keep at least a little of his gross dampness off Shuuichi. “...she did p-promise to be here for Miya’s birth… If there’s anyone who can pull off that sort of promise in this situation...it’s Maki-chan.”

Shuuichi sighed, frowning a little, “...I’m not exactly holding my breath. The wars not exactly going to end just to fit her schedule…”

“Come on, Shuuichi, there’s nothing wrong with having a bit of hope.” Kaito gently chastised, “It’d be nice to have Maki back in time for the birth, wouldn’t it?”

“I’m not saying it wouldn’t be. I’m just saying it’s unlikely… sorry.” Shuuichi apologized, “Sorry. Yes. It would be nice if Maki got back in time for the birth… I think she’d be excited to be an aunt. And… it’d be a comfort, to know she was around… it’d be nice…”

“Well, maybe she’ll manage it.” Kaito softly sighed. “...heh. It’s funny you had a dream about her today, of all days, ‘Kichi. She, uh…” Kaito hesitated, a soft, sad look on his face, as he shrugged, “Well, Maki turned twenty-three today. … it’s a hell of a coincidence… I think it’s nice, you miss Maki. I like that Maki’s become the kind of person you’d miss, babe…”

Looking into the dark of the room, Kaito admitted, “I pray for her a lot, in the shrine… I miss her like crazy, but… I just tell myself this is just another one of her missions, ya know? She’ll go, she’ll do her thing, and she’ll be back, and everything will be okay… like it always was before…”

Kokichi tried so hard to keep up hope for Maki. His belief that she’d come back was...unshakable. He simply believed that there was no way she wouldn’t. And...he hoped that his belief was a comfort his family could use when their fears loomed up upon them. 

But he was uncertain about other things. About what Maki would do to win the war, even if there were tons of other people involved. But...he knew what Maki was like, how she took things personally on her shoulders--it was the reason she’d left for the war in the first place. And Kokichi worried that while others took the time to waver and consider other options...things would be dire enough for her to take action. Do something ‘effective enough’ rather than finding the best way forward. 

And from that...how Maki would be when she returned to them. Kokichi knew she was strong enough to make it back, but even she...war changed people. She wasn’t immune. And Kokichi could only hope that there would still be ways to reach the parts of her that war had changed. 

...and he had no clue when that would be. To keep up hope, he wanted to believe Maki could find a way to end the program, if not the war, in time for her to travel back for Miya’s birth. But...there was no way of knowing. Kokichi didn’t want to imagine years without Maki. But...it was a possibility. Just not the one he was hoping for. 

Kokichi turned slightly, the light from the moon outside catching on his wet eyes as they widened. “...it was her birthday today? ...yesterday? I…” ...he hadn’t known. The entire day and...Kaito and Shuuichi hadn’t even mentioned her until now… Sometimes it really felt like they tried to pretend she wasn’t gone by just...not talking about her. 

And Kokichi knew it was just a weird bias. They both did talk about her, time to time, and it was normal not to talk about someone all the time. And not even just to sigh about her being gone. Sometimes just...normal anecdotes, or commenting that she’d like something because she was in their thoughts. No hiding there, and at least in that case, Kokichi knew his worries were unfounded. 

...but he still wished someone had told him it was her birthday. 

Sniffling, Kokichi reached up to pat at his face, trying to dry himself. “...you’ve said she was gone for months at a time sometimes… I know you both had your own lives going on and all, but...I hate this… I don’t like it when people are gone for a long time…”

“To be fair, I’m not exactly a big fan of it either.” Kaito chuckled, looking warmly down at Kokichi, his eyes starting to adjust properly to the darkness of the room, “And, I don’t like it any more this time than I ever did before… but it’s…”

Kaito frowned, brow tensing, a small swallow, “...it’s… it’s better, this time. Because no one’s making her leave. She… she wanted to do this. That’s always something I’ve wanted for her. Our Maki… she’s not… she’s not the kind of person you can ‘keep’. She’s not the kind of person you should keep…”

“Byakuya’s learning that the hard way.” Shuuichi said, a small smirk on his face, eyes still closed, “Kaede will probably learn that just as hard… one of these days, people are going to learn that Maki’s not the kind of person it’s safe to manipulate. Byakuya literally had her enslaved and brainwashed, and now look at what’s happened… bet he regrets pissing her off now.”

“He probably regrets a lot of things, now.” Kaito murmured.

He hadn’t been lying, all those months ago, when he had given Maki his blessing. He understood the impetus of why she had to go. It was a choice, of course (it was always Maki’s choice) but...for people like them, it rarely felt like one. So as horrible as being separated was...Kokichi at least wasn’t agonized by the knowledge that it was all for nothing. That Maki was just being used for someone else’s agenda. 

“...Maki-chan’s really big,” Kokichi murmured, his own eyes closing. “She has plenty she cares about, but...it’s never been the sort of thing that people can use against her. Maki-chan’s gonna do what she needs to, and she’s too big to try to...steer or shove into your own wants… You just have to send out your own caution and reasoning and hope she trusts you enough to consider it…”

(...it wasn’t just his own words that had stopped her, but...he had a feeling she would’ve been more tempted if he hadn’t been there.)

...Kokichi wasn’t sure what to say about the war. About Byakuya. So he just reached up to hold Kaito’s hand now, giving it a soft squeeze. “...you guys are keeping up with the weekly phone calls?”

“Yep. Yep. We are.” Kaito said quickly, almost as if he were trying to assure Kokichi he was keeping up with some task, squeezing Kokichi’s hand back as he said, “We are… they’re… they’re kind of weird these days. Sometimes they’re really, really short. Just me letting him know any new developments for the week, and then he hangs up. Sometimes he just starts… talking about stuff. And I just listen until he’s done.”

“Do you think he blames you for Maki?” Shuuichi asked.

“...” Kaito didn’t respond at all for a little bit, before shrugging, “I… I don’t know? I don’t know… he asked me if I talked to Kaede at all, recently. I haven't, so I told him no… I don’t really know what’s going on over there. I think Byakuya might be a little… stressed…”

Shuchi snorted. “No kidding.”

“He gets weird, when he’s really stressed out. Sort of… like he’s having conversations with himself, right? But he’ll only say some parts of it out loud, and I’m sure to him, it makes sense, but when you’re just listening, it can seem kind of… out of nowhere and… random...”

“Sounds like King Leon.”

“...maybe a little, yeah…”

“I’ve always thought that was funny… you absolutely got your fathers temper. Loud and explosive… but your reasoning always comes out more like Queen Sayaka. Like, you’re still thinking, when you’re mad. You’re just thinking loudly.” Shuuichi said, eyes opening, interested in exploring his own musings now as he continued, “Byakuya argues the way the queen did, sort of pretentious and stiff and above it all, like he’s arguing with a sludge on his shoe and is a little disgusted with himself for bothering… but when he gets angry? He gets so irrational. He just makes these impulse decisions, born entirely from his fury, and then he has to go back later when he’s calm and rationalize those decisions away… like when he was going to execute Chad? I’m convinced, Kaito, that him accepting your offering to joining the military to save him was more about Byakuya needing an excuse to back out of the public decision he had made on an impulse and knew once he had calmed down it would be a bad idea to follow through on. Not even prince’s can go to prestigious highschools and just… kill people in front of the damn student body, like an assembly. His reputation would have been left in tatters...”

“Maybe.” Kaito murmured. “He seemed pretty set on doing it to me… but I was pretty panicky myself then, so I probably wouldn’t have noticed if he was looking for an excuse not to do it… Byakuya’s so… reactive… I really wish he’d just stop and… just give himself a minute to calm down, sometimes...”

Kokichi could imagine so… From the outside, it didn’t seem like Byakuya would have much time at all to chat with Kaito (as if they had ever talked casually as equals…) and...Kokichi would hazard a guess that the lengthier calls were Byakuya’s vent times. Kaito being a rare person that he could talk almost freely with, between him not being a target of the war and not going to spread around the stuff Byakuya was saying. ...it would almost be flattering, if not for how poorly Byakuya had always treated his brother. 

Listening to Shuuichi describe how the brothers reacted to stress, the similarities from their parents… Kokichi sighed softly. He still didn’t like Byakuya...but they hadn’t been given a chance. Just...never got the guidance, or an example, or...even a hint towards self-reflection growing up to follow. And considering what his friends had thought of therapy, there wasn’t a culture around it either. Not personally or socially...neither Byakuya nor Kaito had really been given a chance to take a look at how they handled stress. 

Kokichi sighed again. “...I think most people would benefit from that, honestly. Sometimes your first instinct can save your life...but when it comes to complex issues, or even emotion-triggered reactions...the first thing that pops into your mind is rarely helpful for anyone.”

...Kokichi chewed on his lip, and for Kaito’s benefit he said, “People tend to calm down as they get older so...maybe that’ll be something your brother starts doing in the future…” 

...considering what Leon had calmed down to, though...maybe it wasn’t a degree that would give many people hope.

…

...Kaito just hoped his brother had a future.

It wasn’t just him he got scared for. It was Kaede to. Marigold and her baby. His nephew. Not even alive yet, but seriously… in so much danger, right now. Shuuichi and Maki’s mentors… who knew what would happen to them, if there was a violent takeover of the castle. To a lot of the senior members of the castle staff, not to mention Byakuya’s personal staff, his set of advisors, his personal indenturedes, trusted housekeepers… would Kaede just let them go? His cousin wasn’t cruel, he didn’t think she’d have them killed. But, well… casualties happened, in war… if it came down to a seize of the castle? Lots of people just trying to do their jobs, jobs they had been doing for decades, would suddenly be in mortal peril.

… but really, Kaito was still mostly scared for his own family. It was unfortunate, that no matter who won, one of his would lose… and honestly, ‘unfortunate’ wasn’t… the right word.

Devastating.

It was devastating.

He wished they would all just get along. Work together. 

He had thought his family loved each other…

Kaito blinked, that dark feeling of despair swirling around inside of him again, as he said quietly, “I might take a trip to the shrine in a bit, since I’m up anyway. I don’t really know what time it is, but if it’s close to morning, do you two want me to bring up breakfast for when you get up?”

“Mmmm… that sounds nice.” Shuuichi said, “With hot chocolate… and coffee…”

“Hot chocolate and tea, Shuuichi, you remember what Tenchi said.”

Shichi just grumbled that Dr. Tenchi didn’t know what she was talking about.

...shrine trip. Kokichi wasn’t worried about Kaito getting lost in his head, and he didn’t have anything against Kaito wanting to pray for people...but Kaito tended to only spontaneously go to his shrine when he was worried and upset. 

...he knew they were talking around it. Maybe that really wasn’t healthy. But...how could they even have that conversation? Shuuichi grumbling about how he didn’t care about Luminary, Kaito trying to grasp with the fact his family was falling apart, and Kokichi...not wanting anyone to die, but sincerely hoping that the Luminary that came out of the war didn’t have any Momota in charge. Mostly because...from everything he’d seen and knew (and he didn’t remember enough to know that the feelings born from his “guesses” about Kaede were more than just silly conjecture) neither Kaede nor Byakuya were good leaders. At least not with the way the country was structured. But then that just came back to him not understanding the Luminary people and what they wanted out of their country and...it just made him really depressed to think about. 

...hot chocolate sounded nice. 

Patting at his face again, feeling a little more in control of himself, Kokichi nodded. “I’d like some hot chocolate too… Maybe we could find some caffeine alternative that’d be okay with your diet right now, Shuu-chan… I know it’s not the same, but...it’s a month and a half. We’re right at the finish line now…”

Kokichi smiled as he felt a kick from Miya, like she wanted to sprint across the finish line already too.

Shuuichi, in turn, groaned, “Nooooo… you bastards… you woke her up…”

At this, Kaito’s eyes lit up, and he was off to get the stethoscope. The shrine to be put off for just a little bit, since baby needed some coo’ing attention.

-

Shuuichi had fully intended to get up for class today.

He really had.

“If anything...it’s both of yours fault.” Shuuichi lamented, curled up with literally all of the blankets and pillows the bed provided, peeking through his fortress of linen at Kokichi accusingly, “Midnight sadness sessions, and then hot chocolate and pancakes and fruit and-”

Kaito rolled his eyes, bringing in the last of the crib parts to their room, “Handsome, you literally made me go back downstairs and get you more pancakes when you saw I only brought you one.”

“I never stood a chance.” Shuuichi grumbled from the bed.

“I’m sorry, Shuu-chan,” Kokichi sighed, making sure that there was a glass of water Shuuichi could grab easily and that he was all properly tucked in. And he was genuinely sorry about waking them all up so early. Most of the melancholy had left him, but there was a certain kind of longing that made him...a little more subdued today. 

“So,” he said, eyeing the painting set up he’d made, making sure he wasn’t forgetting anything, “That’s why I’m keepin’ Shuu-chan company. Nadya-chan said she gets it, and she sends good wishes to ya, by the way, and...I said that if she had any questions, or needed me to sign something it’d be fine to stop by, but...yeah. My work today is hangin’ out with Shuu-chan and finishing painting the cribs. And if Shuu-chan needs anything, I’m here for him!”

“Annnnnd Iiiiiiii have nothing better to do.” Kaito chuckled, giving Shuuichi’s peeping face out of the blankets a fond smirk, “So, heck yeah, let’s get this crib painted and stuff! Though, oh, let me grab the window.”

Getting up, Kaito headed over to the window, opening it a tad, and then feeling how was it was out, just opening up the rest of the way, looking out, pleased by the view. It was just a nice day that day, frankly. Sun was shining, wind was blowing, weird cotten things drifting ominously but steadily by. It even smelled good, which Kaito appreciated in the moment, as it was going to smell like paint very soon.

Heading back, Kaito really was very pleased. Both of his guys were, essentially, taking the day off! Which meant Kaito got to spend the day with them! Heck yeah! 

Grining, on impulse, Kaito crawled onto the bed, and ignoring Shuuichi’s groans of outrage, crawled on top of him, peering through the bedding until he found Shuuichi’s hiding face, who glared up at him, before giving little exasperated sounds as Kaito leaned in and started placing little kisses all over his face.

“Kaitooooo, nooooooo.”

“Why no? You’re not even sleeping, why are you burrowed like that?”

“Comfy.” Shuuichi grumbled.

Kokichi looked over in appreciation as Kaito opened the window, the nice day lifting his spirits too. The paint and sealer he was using on the cribs was non-toxic, but the fumes still weren’t too pleasant. Luckily, there was more than enough ventilation to not have to worry about it affecting any of them. 

The cribs had already gotten a base coat and Kokichi had planned out what he wanted to do, so…all there was was to get to it! With a small palette knife, he started mixing up colors, going to highlight the carving in the wood first. 

“It is really comfy, burrowing yourself in blankets,” Kokichi hummed. “Hopefully it won’t get too hot under there today, though. It’s looking to be a lovely day… It’s nice, being able to watch the clouds go by, or hear people comin’ and going down below.”

“It won’t get hot if Kaito would get off of me.”

“Love me, Shuuichi.”

“No.”

“Looooove meeeeee.” Kaito insisted, leaning in for more kisses… and then making a startled, gasping sound as Shuuichi suddenly reached out of the blanket, placed his palm on Kaito’s chest, and with one good heave, pushed Kaito off the bed entirely. “Gah!”

“That’s right.” Shuuichi grumbled, nustling back into the blankets. “Perish.”

“Ow…” Kaito whimpered, having landed on his back, briefly looking hurt and pouty… before eyeing Kokichi’s pallet and, rolling over, said, “Oooooh, that’s a nice color.”

Kokichi shook his head in exasperation. They might all be taking the day off, in a way, but that certainly didn’t mean they were gonna have sex the whole time--even if Kaito’s advances seemed more geared towards cuddling and kisses. Really, if Shuuichi was feeling bad enough that he’d chosen to take a day of bedrest, Kokichi wasn’t going to expect anything active from him. 

Giving Kaito a soft smile, Kokichi nudged his journal over towards Kaito, though he’d already shown the sketch and color ideas to his partners. “I’m gonna stick to softer pastels for the top part of the crib, so it’s not too distracting when we’re gonna put Miya down, but for the parts she can’t see from the inside? The legs are gonna look like they’re sitting in grass, and butterflies are gonna be flying out from it. I have a lot of freedom with the wing colors, so that’s gonna be a lot of fun…”

“Her room really does look amazing…” he hummed. “You guys did a really good job picking out the furniture and accessories and all that stuff…”

“Well, it was a lot easier, when we finally saw how the walls were turning out. All those crazy flowers, and those soft oranges and blue and pinks… just got a bunch of stuff that worked with it, ya know? Now our Miya’s room is a damn work of art.” Kaito grinned, before, putting his head in his hands, content to just watch Kokichi paint for a bit, he said, “I promised Tim I’d paint his room dark green.”

“He wants his room dark green?” Shuuichi asked from his hoard.

“Mmhm. Guess he just likes the color. Thought I might get him some bedding to match it too. It’s probably something we’ll work together on this weekend.” Kaito grinned, feeling weirdly wide awake, considering he only slept maybe four hours last night. “Also, I’ve decided. I’m going back for the seal.”

“Don’t get that, Kaito, it’s too much for a giant stuffed seal that’s just gonna take up space.” Shuuichi chastised. “It’s too big for her to even play with for, like, the first year of her life.”

“It was so cute! And huggable!”

“She already has cute and huggable things. Ones that are more reasonably sized, too.”

Again, Kokichi wondered if that’s how his parents had felt when they were designing his room. Proud and excited and fawning over all the little details. Miya’s room was full of bright but soft flowers growing out of rolling green fields, animals grazing in the distance and birds soaring in the sky… Even if Kaito and Shuuichi had barely been able to pull him away from nitpicking every little line, Kokichi was...satisfied. 

“Nice… Lemme know what shade you two decide on. I know Tim’s not really the type, but I would be happy to paint something for him if he wants anything.” Or if he could recommend body pain that would be able to match the color. Between the walls and his bed, Timothy might be able to get up to some creative camouflage. 

Shaking his head a little--the seal was huge, even for Kokichi’s standards--Kokichi cooed softly. “I’ll never get over that little sheep my dad made. It’s so soft I’m almost jealous. But no, it’s meant for baby drool. At least it’ll be easy to clean…”

“Aw, yeah, that thing is cute.” Kaito agreed, kicking his legs slightly, before using one foot to scratch at his other. When he had realized the other two were staying in today, he had quickly abandoned his shoes and his shirt, comfy in just a pair of dark purple pants. He had a little peach fuzz today, not just on his chin, but well… everywhere that he regularly shaved now. He’d usually wait till after he had dropped Tim off at school to come back and do all his ‘detail work’, but, well, his partners were more entertaining than spending forty minutes in the bathroom. He’d do it later.

“The guy has a real talent for sewing stuffed animals. I wonder if the sheep will end up lasting as long as Smug Rabbit?” Kaito asked, glancing over the closet, where Smug Rabbit lay… dormant.

“I hope…” Kokichi sighed, accentuating the graceful curves of the wood with soft colors meant to be a wind wafting by. “There’s something really special about keeping a childhood toy that you’ve had for years. Though...I wasn’t a baby when Daddy made me the rabbit.”

Kokichi thought back, loading his brush up with more paint. “I think...I regularly had it out and in use for...eight? Years? Something like that… And the housekeepers I knew cleaned it semi-regularly...someone might’ve done repairs, but I never noticed. But after that I’ve been keeping all my old stuffed animals in boxes so they don’t really get dirty or worn down.”

“...I’ve been thinking of giving them to Miya, when she’s a little older. I really love them, and I kept them around...just...if I needed them. But I think it’d be best for a toy to be played with.”

“Mmmmm…” Kaito lopped himself over, now laying on his back near the crib parts, arms stretched out and staring at the ceiling as he said, “I mean… that’s a great sentiment… but these things, or at least I know the rabbit is, are real important to ya, ‘Kichi. If we’re talking when she’s in her twenties or something, yeah, Miya will probably keep the toys out of love for ya. But if we’re talking when she’s six?”

Kaito tilted his head up, giving his husband a soft, if sheepish look, “She’ll have her own toys to fall in love with, but I think your sweet heart would shatter, if she managed to lose or destroy that rabbit. Which, ya know… six year olds do, to their toys. Ya know?”

Turning over again and getting up onto his elbows, he said brightly, “Besides! That rabbit is gonna be worth so much money, someday! That rabbit could end up being our grandkids down payment on a house! We gotta think about preserving our treasures for when the family needs the funds, babe!”

“Oh, no, like, I love Miya, and kids will be kids when it comes to their toys...but I would cry for days if she destroyed my rabbit.” Kokichi shook his head, feeling a little heartbroken just thinking about it. “I mean my other stuffed animals. They can take a little beating up, and even if she ends up not caring for them much, I still think it’s just a win for everyone if she wants to play with them. And it would free up a chunk of closet space…”

Kokichi looked up and over at their closet, which while still held what they needed it to, was...a bit crowded these days. 

But he turned back to Kaito with a raised eyebrow. “I know I’ve told you guys that it’s my treasure, but I don’t know if there’s anyone who’d pay more than a silver at most. I dunno if it’s exactly the kind of thing our kids would care much about passing down… It’ll probably end up in a rummage sale one day.”

“Well, sure, now it won’t sell for much.” Kaito shrugged, “But give it a hundred years and, for a genuine lifetime cherished childhood doll of Kokichi Ouma, leader of Dicea during whatever damn century we’re in?” Kaito chuckled, looking fondly at the crib, “Everything notably attached to you, given enough time, if you make enough impact on history-- and who are we kidding, you will-- is going to rise in value if only for collectors.” 

“People make enough money? It becomes ridiculous, what they’ll spend on, and how much they’ll spend on that hobby.” Shuuichi said from his burrow. “Maybe in Dicea, just because of the culture here, no one would… but other countries? Kaito’s right, depending on what sort of effect you have on history, everything you own raises in value.”

Kokichi looked between his partners--or at least what he could see of Shuuichi’s form under the blankets and pillows--with astonishment, though...he knew they were both telling the truth. It was crazy, what might end up being heirlooms in the future…

“...I guess as long as no one trys to...like, sell my underwear, that’d be fine…” He looked around his room, noting a few things that he personally treasured, like his drawings and letters, a few books… Really, everything he owned…

Kokichi blinked slowly as he went back to the crib. “There’s some sheet music that’s kept in the castle archive… It’s...sort of considered a cultural heirloom. My...I guess you could call him my grandfather? He composed a duet for piano and violin, apparently to play with a friend of his. I tried to learn the piano part once,” Because he had been feeling lonely and disconnected from his father and he just...wanted to find some sort of connection with the Oumas and royal members of the past, “But it was...way too hard for me. Sheet music is confusing… If I ever see it advertised for a concert or something, I’ll point it out. Apparently it’s really pretty.”

“Yeah? Well, to someone out there, the sheets he wrote it on? The original sheets? That would be a treasure.” Kaito said cheerfully, fighting an incredibly strong, if equally weird, impulse to put his finger on the crib paint. Though, he looked curiously at Kokichi, “Do you play the piano, babe? Like, less complicated pieces than what your grandfather made?”

Kokichi knew that Fuse had treasured them. That was probably why the original sheet music was in the archive, though all original Dicean compositions eventually made it into some sort of archive. 

Cleaning his brush, Kokichi shook his head. “Barely, and I wouldn’t even really call what I do playing… There’s a music room that has a grand piano, and while it’s usually booked, sometimes I’d go in when it was empty and mess around. Try to copy songs I’ve heard. My grandfather wrote a lot of pieces, and there’s a book that stays in there full of them. Aiichi never met him, but...I figured that there would be someone who would be happy to hear the songs. Never really figured them out well, though.”

“Hm… any other instruments? Or just piano?” Kaito asked, before smirking, “Sorry, barely piano.”

Kokichi gave his husband a dry look and shook his head before he focused back on painting. “No. I think there are some percussion instruments that stay in the music room, but piano’s the main one. Mostly people bring their own instruments if they make use of it. I used to sneak off during lessons sometimes to listen to people play music while I studied.”

“Mmmmm.” Kaito hummed cheerfully, laying his head on his folded arms, “...youuuuu should play me something, ‘Kichi. I can imagine you, playing something nice at a grand piano, singing in that sweet little voice… I think that’d be fun…” 

Kaito had said it entirely innocently… though his eyes suddenly went wide with wonder as he said, “You on top of a grand piano… ooooooh…”

“I definitely can’t do that,” Kokichi huffed. “It takes all my concentration to even just play a simplified melody. And forget it...you know I’m not a good singer.”

Rolling his eyes, Kokichi was sorely tempted to swipe a brushstroke of paint onto his husband’s face...but that was a slippery slope heading right for a paint fight, and while fun, he did want to try and finish the crib today. “Unless you want me lying on the strings, which, ow, no, that’s not a piano people are playing. Pianos are expensive too...I’d feel bad sitting on one.”

“Pfff, spoilsport. You weigh nothing, Kokichi, it’s not like you’d bend it.” Kaito pouted… though he did admit, “I weigh a little more. Between the two of us, we’d probably break it… actually, yeah.” Kaito grinned, something almost smug in his expression as he snickered, “Between the two of us, we’d definitely break it.”

“Stop sounding proud of your imaginary fucking.” Shuuichi scolded from his nest, “Though, I also think it’d be nice if you played us something, Kokichi. It’s a shame…between the three of us, if Miya inherit our musical abilities, it looks like she’s not getting much to work with.”

“I could teach her a little hurdy gurdy.” Kaito said. “And Kaede and Aunt Ibuki have a ton of musical chops to pass down, if that’s actually how it works.”

“Kaito, you literally gave  that up at, like, fifteen. And you could barely play it then.”

“I could play it a little! I fucking killed it on Silent Night, man. And Itsy Bitsy Spider?” Kaito laughed, “If you could teach it to a five year old? I had the song mastered.”

“More than a little more,” Kokichi snorted. “And you’d break me if you sat on me. I’m really at the biggest disadvantage here, since I can’t hold either of you in my lap. I gotta get all my lap-lovin’ in with Miya before she gets too big too.”

Kokichi glanced up in interest--he knew that they’d mentioned Kaede could play piano before, but this was the first he’d heard about Kaito’s aunt being musically inclined too--feeling his heart warm a bit at hearing Kaito’s limited skills, but…

“...what on earth is a ‘hurdy gurdy’?”

Kaito looked at Kokichi in mild surprise, “...What do you mean? Like… like what actually is a hurdy gurdy?”

“Guess they don’t have them here.” Shuuichi sighed, finally squirming out of his nest a little, resting more on top of the blankets to give himself some air. “It’s, uh… like, a turn-crank… violin?”

“Yeah! That’s as good an explanation as any. Kind of like that… shit, what did you call it… the air instrument thing we saw at the dance hall? Miniature piano connected to it?”

A...turn-crank violin… Kind of like the opposite of playing a regular violin, then, he guessed, where instead of having silence and making vibrations, it was always vibrating and you’d change notes or stop certain strings by touching them...okay, he could imagine that…

“Accordion,” Kokichi nodded as he conceptualised the instrument. “Huh...an air piano and a turn-crank violin. I wonder if my grandfather’s duet would be able to be played on them.”

Kokichi perked, giving Kaito an excited look. “But! Even if you stopped playing it, that’s super cool! Do you think you’d wanna pick it up again?”

“Nah, probably not. I only learned to play it in the first place because it’s one of those things everyone at a certain status has to learn growing up. An instrument, I mean. Byakuya can play the actual violin, really, really well, actually, though he doesn’t have any love for it. He just knows how, ya know? My dad can…” Kaito twitched, “... could play the guitar. He, uh…” Kaito laughed, “He was really into it, but wasn’t as good as he thought he was. Mom could play the harp just… honestly, beautifully. I wish she had done it more often…”

“I should have kept playing mine into my teen years, if only to keep up appearances, but I was going through a whole…” Kaito waved his hand vaguely, “Rebellious phase. Ended up giving my instrument away… oh! Actually, Piper was on the list, wasn’t she?” Kaito asked, looking to Shuuichi, who nodded, “I gave it to the orphanage for anyone to play, but Piper fell in love with the damn thing a few years ago. I hope they let her take it with her on the trip. That’ll be a treat, to hear her play again.”

That was a nice tradition, picking up an instrument… If she showed any interest, Kokichi knew he’d support Miya learning music whole-heartedly, even if it was something he didn’t know very well. ...maybe she’d even pick up the harp, and Kaito could share something lovely about her grandma with her.

Kokichi smiled to himself as he started painting blades of grass onto the legs of the crib. “I’m looking forward to meeting all of them… Dad and I have to do the welcoming thing, but...I mean, I’d be apprehensive of me, if I were them. I don’t wanna impose, especially since it’ll be a reunion for some of you… But if any of the kids are up for it… It’ll be a good day.”

“Yeah, the kids will… proooobably be a little nervous.” Kaito admitted, tapping his fingers together, “...maaaaybe a lot nervous. We’ll see. I’m sure Maki and Hina told them they’d be fine. Most of them won’t have known Hina, but she came from the same orphanage, so that has to give her some clout. And they trust Maki, so… so… it’ll… proooobably be fine.”

“...and if it’s not, we’ll work it out. None of them are trained fighters at least, so… how bad could it get?” Kaito mused.

“Hopefully none of them feel a strong urge to stab you twice in the back.” Shuuichi teased slightly.

Kaito sighed, “Yeah, man, hopefully.”

...he wondered if any of them really believed that they were free now. That was part of the welcoming ceremony, Aiichi talking with each kid and getting the corresponding name so he could finish their citizenship papers. He wondered if they’d just look at that paper and think it was another contract…

Kokichi sighed, painting in small, delicate strokes. “All the foster parents Aiichi and the admins picked out… I think they’re still doing seminars, even now. It’ll be up to the kids, who they wanna go with, but...I’m hoping it’ll work out…”

“...I know it’s...a bit to ask,” Kokichi murmured, giving Kaito a shy look, “But I am hoping that having you two and Tim there will be a relief. There’s gonna be...a lot of strangers in a strange place. Hopefully a little familiarity will help…”

“Oh, trust me, I’m hoping it’ll help too.” Kaito said, a somewhat wary look on his face… but he grinned, giving Kokichi a bright look as he said, “But, hey! There’s nothing to really worry about! Even if they’re a little nervous at first, give it some time… I’m sure they’ll love this place!”

“Well, probably, right? I mean… they’re not going to have the same pitfalls and hangups we and Tim did, when we got here. So long as there’s not weird drug things or assassnation attempts? It’ll probably be a much smoother transition.” Shuuichi theorized, before looking down at the crib pieces Kokichi was working on, “That looks nice, Kokichi.”

“There’s nice places to play here, gardens, really… interesting food? And… and… it’ll be fine. Things will be good. I’ll keep an eye out for all of them, they can come to me for anything if anyone… gets weird with them or anything…” Kaito frowned, before shaking his head, “But no one will, and the King’s been working really, really hard to make certain no one will. And, yeah… yeah! It’ll be fine.”

“You know, I believed you at first… and then you just kept talking.” Shuuichi murmured.

“It will. Me being nervous and things actually being wrong are not the same thing. I need to be able to recognize when something’s actually bad, and when I’m projecting.” Kaito said, sounding like he was quoting something, before his eyes widened, standing up as he said, “Oh, you know what I need to work on? I still haven't done my hierarchy list homework thing.” Going to the vanity desk and taking out a pencil and some sheets of paper. “We have a session with Dr. Mariah tomorrow, don’t we? I have to do that…”

There would be fewer stressful things going on, for sure. But...still. Kokichi worried that the kids would just feel...alien and adrift and like they couldn’t trust anything in Dicea, not even the things he and Aiichi had been working on to ensure their safety. He knew it was better than what would’ve been waiting for them in Luminary, but...he still worried. 

...and it seemed like he and Kaito were on the same page there. 

Kokichi looked over at his husband in surprise before it softened into affection. They both had their neuroses to work on…

“Mm...she did say it was more of a suggestion, but...I mean, since I asked about it, I would appreciate it… On that note, though.” Kokichi looked over to the nest on the bed, barely able to pick out a hint of blue among them. “Shuu-chan, do you think you’re gonna wanna come tomorrow?”

As Kaito grabbed a larger book from the bookshelf, sitting cross legged on the bed and giving the paper a concentrated look, Shuuichi flumped back onto his pillows and said, “I mean… I probably should, right…”

“As much as I want to steadily work on our communication stuff, if it hurts you to walk out into town, handsome…” Kaito glanced at Kokichi, before saying earnestly to Shuuichi, “You don’t have to. I don’t think either of us are going to say you have to.”

Shuuichi looked quietly over to Kaito… before sighing, “Can I wait till tomorrow before I say yes or no? If I say no now, then even if I’m feeling strong enough tomorrow, I’ll still not want to do it. Leaving it out in the open at least might give me some willpower to go.”

“Mmmm.” Kaito tapped his pencil against the paper, “...Kokichi? Does Dicea have, like… lords or ladies or anything like that?”

“You can definitely decide at time,” Kokichi nodded. “Whatever makes things easier for you? That’s how we’ll do things.”

He didn’t want to continually compare his own bedridden bouts to Shuuichi’s. It just...felt weird to. But Kokichi couldn’t help drawing on his own experience. And sometimes the best thing was to take everything day by day, not holding up expectations for yourself, but not locking yourself out of opportunities either. 

Kokichi took a smaller brush out, deciding to paint a few little ladybugs on the grass blades swaying up the side of the crib legs. He thought they were still gross and scary, but...the design was a little cute, and Kokichi didn’t want to instill any of his own phobia into his daughter. 

Humming as he peered closely for the small detail work, Kokichi shook his head slightly. “No. We don’t really have...nobility. Each community has a representative leader and a team of admins that manage the day-to-day stuff and send reports back to the castle...like work order receipts and court transcripts ‘n stuff like that… I think you could think of them like...people managing a duchy, and such, but...most towns I know have an election every...whatever amount of years they choose, and vote on a rep and their team…”

Kaito nodded absentmindedly, listening and thinking at the same time, a mildly confused look on his face.

“Our whole relationship therapy is about communication, Kaito.” Shuuichi gently reminded him, more than familiar with what that expression meant, “Whether we talk about this list while you’re making it or tomorrow during therapy, I think either way it counts.”

“Yeah?” Kaito asked, glancing at Suichi, rubbing at his neck with the eraser of his pencil, before glancing over at Kokichi, “That alright with you, babe?”

Kokichi had been focused on his painting--it wasn’t so bad if he just thought about it as painting cute little red circles--but looked up when Shuuichi spoke up. And, carefully, he put the crib leg down to devote the entirety of his gentle smile to Kaito. “Mhmm! Ideally, therapy helps us get to the point where we can have these kinds of conversations freely. If we can talk now, then I’m about it! If it needs to be something we talk about with someone there to help us through it, then that’s okay too.”

“...so. What was on your mind?”

“Right… right..” Kaito tapped the pencil against the paper, “So… technically, right? Technically? Shuuichi and I… well, less Shuuichi, but for kind of shitty reasons… um, anyway, one thing at home is that when it comes to politics, publicly? We, or I, we agree with, or… sorry! I’m so weirdly nervous! Why am I nervous!?”

Kaito laughed, something strained in it, before he took a breath, shaking his head as he said, “So! Politics! We, I, I, have an obligation to not publicly disagree with you on politics. If anyone asks me a political opinion, I defer to whatever you’ve said about it. This is to keep me from subverting you, or, ya know, undermining you. Now, now, I know it’s okay for me to have my own political beliefs, you’re not going to be upset with me for that… but are there any groups of people in Dicea I should specifically not disagree with you in front of?”

...Kokichi knew it was important to acknowledge and understand the culture his partners came from, but…

...this was why so much harmful policy got passed. Because it...wasn’t allowed? Or was just too rude to even consider dissenting. When debate was what made policies stronger, what stopped horrible ideas in their tracks… No wonder Kaito said that people had so much hope, with how much Kaede and Byakuya fought over ideas. 

Sighing softly, Kokichi genuinely tried to think...but he shook his head. “No. If someone’s asking you about policy, then they want to know what you, specifically think--it won’t reflect on me or anyone else who can propose policies.”

Tugging on his hair softly, Kokichi thought for another moment. “...honestly, if you disagreed with politics with me, I’d personally like if you brought it up with me before...I dunno. Court or something. But if it never came up in our conversations, and it did in public? I’d appreciate you saying what you truly believe. It might straight up be better than how I was thinking, or it might spark a debate, but all of those options will only benefit everyone involved.”

“... Shuuichi?” Kaito asked, looking over this partner, “What do you think?”

“...Maybe someday.” Shuuichi shrugged, looking tired, “Honestly, I can’t imagine giving my opinion to… well, that’s the thing. Dicea doesn’t really have an ‘elite’ society, so… I don’t know? I think I’d be too freaked out to do it right now, but given time? Maybe…”

Kaito sighed, nodding, “Yeah, I was kinda feeling the same. I get what you’re saying,  Kokichi? And I feel basically okay talking to you about politics and such, but...I think I’d feel too nervous, trying to disagree with you in public. I know you’d… more or less be okay with it. But I feel like I’d be too uncomfortable to go through with it, at least, like, right now. But, like Shuuichi said, maybe in the future? I’ll feel differently about it…” Kaito looked over to Shuuichi, as he said, “And, you know you can disagree with me, right?”

“Obviously.’

“Publicly?”

“We just answered this question, Kaito… not that it matters what I think about politics to anyone, but I’m not exactly about to run my mouth at any parties full of lords and ladies, or go to court shouting about anything. I’m not interested either way, and I wouldn’t want to embarrass you.”

“I wouldn’t be embarrassed. Plus, you’re a lord now, so… I don’t care what anyone says, your opinion would matter too. And any opinion you have, politically, would probably be more reasoned out than mine would be, so…” Kaito tapped his pencil against the paper, before saying, “Okay, how about, for now as a personal choice, me and Shuuichi wait until we feel more comfortable in Dicea to give out our own opinions publicly, with the assumption being we will someday… but when we go visit Luminary, we defer to Kokichi? Can we agree on that?”

“Alright… Most folks will let it go if you say you don’t wanna talk politics, and anyone who pushes it tends to be a raging asshole, so not the kind of person you’d really wanna talk to anyway.” Kokichi shrugged. “But...if something does strike you, please bring it up with me later. Even if we end up disagreeing even after talking it over, I’d feel like such a damn jerk to not even consider your view…”

Kokichi sighed and started painting again, though his eyes narrowed slightly in confusion. He was...supposed to be embarrassed by his partners publicly having different opinions? Even if it was because of...like, them not understanding a law, that still wasn’t embarrassing… And what Kaito said before about not undermining or subverting him...Kokichi didn’t get that either…

...another question for his “unsaid” page, then. 

It was easier in Dicea, for sure. But for Luminary… Kokichi looked back up, not exactly looking pleased, but...he sighed. “...if it’s safer that way, okay. Honestly, I’m gonna try and not talk politics at all when we go. I just don’t know Luminious law enough to make an informed opinion on much of anything.”

...and for moral reasoning...he didn’t want to start a fight. Even if, in a battle of souls, he’d want to fight every last person who thought it was perfectly okay to exploit someone. But it was exactly that impulse that made him decide that...they were all probably better off not talking about Luminous politics with him. 

“Okay! Good! That’s one down!” Kaito said, writing down the rule, before chewing at the end of his pencil, “Right… what else…”

“How do financial contracts work here?” Shuuichi asked, “Who ultimately signs for our loans and… can we buy property on our own?”

“What? No… can we?” Kaito asked, looking at Kokichi, a little shocked by this idea.

Kokichi, in turn, looked kind of surprised at Kaito. “Of course you can? If you can afford something, you can have it. For all that I offered to help you with budgeting, I’m not in charge of your wealth, and I’m not entitled to any of it either. I mean...it’s pretty common for the deceased to leave their money and property to spouses, but it’s their decision as written into their will.”

Shifting a little into a more comfortable sitting arrangement, Kokichi tried to explain more about the Dicean economy. “If you need a loan, then...you ask someone on the loan list. If you need help getting in contact with someone, then you can come to the castle--or the main community center, in other towns and villages--and ask the rep, which would be someone on the admin team here, for help setting up a meeting.”

“I know a lot of folks appreciate some sort of presentation, like...so they can see your plan for the loan money, but in the case of a personal loan?” Kokichi shrugged. “Most times, folks will approve it without much explanation. They’re not looking to hear someone’s life story, you know? Then you draw up a contract, and while you and the loan giver can make your own, each local administration, and most law offices too, will have general use blank contracts that you can alter to your needs. Kinda like the contracts Maki-chan and I went through when she accepted the bodyguard job. Most of the time, that’s where the story ends, but if someone violates the contract and it can’t be solved personally, then it goes to court and...well, it is a felony. Appropriate measures depending on the case will be carried out.”

Kokichi paused, cleaning his brush. “...I have...no idea what I might’ve rushed through that you don’t know so… Any questions?”

Kaito still looked a little baffled, while Shuuichi nodded.

“...so you don’t need to co-sign my contracts?” Kaito asked, “Like, any of them, or just financial ones?”

Kokichi admirably was able to suppress his confused look as he shook his head. “Nope. None. You’re not my dependent, and you’re not a ward of the government so...you’re a full citizen who does full citizen things. Really, the only thing that we needed to sign together because of being married was our marriage papers.”

“I thought that might be the case… there was no section to mention a spouse in my university paperwork.” Shuuichi recalled, “Though, it’s good to get it confirmed.”

Kaito went back to chewing at the end of his pencil, not so much ‘alarmed’ now, just sort of … surprised. Knowing he could sign contracts without Kokichi wouldn’t change any of his plans, he’d still run everything by Kokichi first, because that felt like the smart thing to do, but… wow. 

“Okay…” Kaito tapped on the paper… Kokichi wasn’t exactly about to go off and take any additional side partners or hire any concubines, and Kaito had no desire to sleep around-- if only because he knew both of his partners would hate it, and he respected them enough to not even seriously think about it himself-- so that probably didn’t need to be brought up, “...what else…”

“What about if you committed a crime, Kokichi?” Shuuichi suddenly asked, “Not that you would, but… in Luminary, spouses can’t be tasked with giving evidence against the head of the family. They can’t legally go against them in court at all, whether they want to or not. What's the rules on that, here?”

...what an odd rule. Though, this time, Kokichi tilted his head back and forth. “I guess...to explain it best, is that there’s not really any legislation about that. Spouses can legally testify or present evidence against their spouse, but, like anyone, they can plead silence in the face of a warrant or a court vow. There have been plenty of cases where a spouse has actually been the person initiating a legal battle against their spouse. Married people, legally, aren’t considered, like...bound in any way. They’re not legally obligated to do anything to or for each other.”

“...oh,” he hummed, adding after a moment, “And if I was convicted, then neither of you guys would face any sort of penalty, unless you too had committed a crime. You’re not obligated to settle my debts or affairs or anything.”

“...Then…” Kaito frowned, not in displeasure, but more… just confusion and maybe a little wariness, not wanting to say anything upsetting, but, “...why… get married?”

“We don’t make family members pay for the head’s crimes back in Luminary… most punishment is very individual.” Shuuichi said, holding his pillow against himself, “Though, loans can be passed down to their kids or their spouses, but no further than that. That’s where a lot of indentured contracts come from… but, beyond that, yeah, I was kind of wondering that too. If it’s not legally binding two people, why do people in Dicea get married? What’s the purpose?”

Kokichi nodded slightly, absorbing Shuuichi’s clarification on Luminous law, but then he just gave his partners a soft look. “I thought I had said before, but I don’t think I explained it very well… Marriage is more of a social binding than anything. And most people don’t actually get married. When you marry someone, you’re declaring to each other and society that this is someone you’ve chosen to spend your whole life with. That you’ve found someone you can’t bear to live without.”

“There are, actually, a few legal things with it… Your marriage certificate gets put into public records, so the government recognizes your bond too. It gives you more sway if your spouse ends up in the hospital and is only allowed to see a few people, though I know a lot of places let partners of any kind in. And if I’m ever in a situation where I can’t make decisions for myself, there’s still a little overhead, to prevent cases of doing this on purpose, but a spouse is able to make decisions on my behalf, like concerning kids or putting me on leave for my job or talking to a loan-giver about suspending payments until I’m well.”

“When you’re looking to adopt, it looks better to be married on paper, ‘cause it means that you and your partner aren’t going to be splitting up, ideally. Though, again, in interviews, if you clarify that you’ve been together for a while, that usually gives the same confidence. While legally you’re still seen as separate people, socially, you’re seen as bound. To some people, that’s important.”

“...” Kaito nodded, looking down at his paper. “Okay, okay… okay…”

“...” Kaito sighed, running his hand through his hair and saying, “Kokichi? I don’t regret any of this, and I love you. Deeply. But… if Aiichi had any idea what Luminary was expecting, when they sent me, and just… asked for me anyway? Knowing how different all of this was going to be?”

Huffing, Kaito said, a frustrated look on his face, “... Your father… the kings… ngh. God, if he had any idea, he’s a fucking asshole. Marriages have huge legal consequences for people, in Luminary… and there, I’m legally married to you. I… if I were to go back on my own? Without divorce papers? Kokichi, I have so little legal rights without you. But you have almost no legal responsibility for me here. What if we hadn’t gotten along!? I’d be in this weird, legal limbo state… I mean, it worked out. I guess I can’t be mad at the king because, like… he knows you wouldn’t have just… abandoned me without a damn parachute. You’re not the kind of person, even if we didn’t get along. But… fuck. If my family… did my family know!?”

Kaito’s eyes suddenly got wide, as he realized, “They had to have, right? Dad, mom… they went to school with Aiichi? They had to have known somewhat, what being married meant in Dicea. They grew up before the war! They had to have known I was basically going to be independent here, and they didn’t… tell me? Warn me? I came here with no finances because I thought I was going to be a part of your family financial plan, I came with no plans because I thought you’d have already decided what you were going to do with me, I assumed just… that everything was going to be the same as if I was getting married to a noble in Luminary! And, and… it’s… well, look at how many misunderstandings not knowing that I wasn’t going to legally belong to you caused us! I was so fucking freaked out when I got here and realized you had no more idea what to do with me than I did! Why didn’t any of them warn us!?” 

“Maybe… mmm…” Shuuichi frowned, “...I mean, we’ve talked about this before. The only explanation I’ve ever heard suggested is that maybe even before the war, communication between the countres was just… really poor. Maybe none of your parents actually knew? I mean, when my mentor sat down with me and told me what to expect for being a civilian in Dicea, it was basically just a rundown of what being a civilian meant in Luminary. I wasn’t aware of any of the legal differences here either, and she grew up in your parents timeframe as well.”

Kokichi frowned slightly. So...even people who weren’t in the program...weren’t necessarily free. “I...don’t suppose you guys would have an answer to give me why you would want to sign away your legal rights by getting married in Luminary…” Kokichi just...couldn’t imagine why anyone would choose to become a legal dependent if it wasn’t because of severe illness. He could understand marrying for money--because while there was no legal impetus, married folk did tend to combine their funds for most things--but...all the other stuff? Why would you ever not want to give yourself the option to...live?

He’d thought that Kaito had just been unprepared. At his worst opinion, he’d considered Kaito a spoiled brat who had never needed to think about himself, so had no plans. But...it wasn’t because of Kaito he was unprepared. It was...the entire understandings between their countries. 

Kokichi sighed deeply and flopped himself backward on the floor, just lying there for a moment as he rubbed his forehead. “I mean...we all know Aiichi’s fuckin’ awful at explaining things… But we had merchants going between our countries before the war! And...really?! Nothing got through? That’s…”

He let out a frustrated noise before sighing again. “...well, at least we have the seminars now. Maybe we should just straight up ask for a list of your established laws, and we can give Luminary ours, and we can add a whole fuckin...year of classes explaining all the differences…”

Kaito seemed to consider Kokichi’s question a bit… before settling on, “I think, basically, for safety? Like… you’d get a companion you can rely on, and I’d get your protection. I mean, that’s just me trying to theorize based on how I understand our culture, no one ever sat me down and was like, we gotta get you married off or something terrible is going to happen to you. In fact, honestly…” Kaito rubbed the back of his neck, before shrugging, “Barring this specific situation? I should have virtually never been in the position where I was getting married as anything other than the head of my family. I was… am, I am a Prince of Luminary. I’m… I’m one of the highest ranking people, socially, in our society. Beyond marrying another prince or princess, which, why would I? This should have never come up for me… but, when I was growing up, and imagining getting married someday? It was always this idea of giving my spouse safety. Taking care of them. Not letting them or their family or our children want for anything… marrying someone, to me, growing up, meant taking responsibility for them, their wellbeing, their happiness…”

“And, yeah… in exchange, they’d defer to me. I’d make all the legal decisions for the family, and I could ask them to not do things, because it would make things complicated or embarrass us… I guess one aspect of being able to legally take care of someone, being that legally, they’d have to… let me.” Kaito considered all of this… before admitting, “I think I would have been more okay with that a year ago now… I mean, I would have been. Unless you were straight up abusive? I wasn’t planning on rebelling. I was going to defer to you, and let you take the lead. I was… it took awhile, but I was emotionally ready to do it. But...now… I’ll admit, that’s all a little tougher to think about. It feels more… controlling, than it did before. Now that, I don’t know… we’ve been doing it like this for so long. I’d probably get a little upset, if you just told me straight up I couldn’t do something…”

“I never thought about it, growing up.” Shuuichi said, before looking pointedly at Kaito and Kokichi, “Hear this? This is me, sharing. No one had to give me puppy eyes or anything… anyway, growing up, I think a part of me thought I was going to be single my whole life, so I never gave it all too much thought… well, except for Kaede, for a short amount of time there… but, well, if I was… ha… ugh, it’s so stupid to say aloud, that I ever even entertained this thought…” Shuuichi sighed, before laughing again, “Well, maybe not that stupid… I’m with two princes now… anyway, if by some miracle, I actually got to marry the Princess of Luminary? Heh… can’t believe I thought that was a possibility… well, then, obviously I’d defer to her in everything. She’s not only my better, she’s a princess. I was obviously never going to be the head… and it wasn’t like I wasn’t used to following orders anyway.”

“Maybe all of our parents did know, and just thought it’d be funnier or more convenient not to tell us.” Kaito muttered, “I could see dad doing that… just keeping it to himself for… whatever reason. Thanks, dad. Glad you felt comfortable just shipping me off to another country with potentially no safety nets. Suuuuuper… man I got lucky... though, if he knew and just didn’t tell me, he also didn’t tell Byakuya. Byakuya was pissed when he found out the Ouma family wasn’t financially responsible for me. No allowances, no oversight, nothing like that… I did tell him about the monthly payments everyone gets though. That seemed to calm him down a little bit… I wonder if he ever asked Aiichi how it worked. He said he was going too. He seemed interested in how it was funded.”

Safety and responsibility… Kokichi moved his hand off his head, though he remained staring at the ceiling, a pensive look on his face. When put into the terms of what Kaito was expecting for a spouse...that was something he could understand, even if he didn’t agree with it. 

...he still didn’t understand what was embarrassing or complicated about a spouse thinking differently than you, though… Maybe personally complicated, but that wasn’t the public’s business at all. Their confusion wasn’t your problem. 

Kokichi’s relatively placid expression hardened, his jaw clenching, as Shuuichi shared, not because he didn’t want to hear his boyfriend’s thoughts--they were appreciated as always--but...fuck. The notion that Kaede was somehow “better” than Shuuichi...it made him want to scream. While the idea of people somehow inherently being “better” or “worse” frustrated him, it usually didn’t spark such anger, though, and...Kokichi had...no idea where that came from, but it did. 

“...I’m sorry, but… I think I would’ve lost my mind living in Luminary,” he sighed. Being quiet and tired so he wasn’t screaming. Giving up even more of his freedom, being bound by weird rules that didn’t make sense to him… Well, he supposed it was the same for his partners but just...having freedom where they weren’t expecting it. 

Kaito gave Kokichi a mildly worried look… before sighing, “Yeah… I think you would have hated it. Honestly, thinking about it all now… especially considering how I imagined treating my own spouse someday? I think the only reason it… doesn’t feel worse? Growing up in it? Is because one aspect of being a good head… at least, for me, one aspect of being a good head of the family, was that you… didn’t flaunt that power? Just because you were in control, doesn’t mean you had to be controlling… you’d… like…”

“Like if you had been sent to live with me, Kokichi? Marry me? Take the Momota name under me… or if Maki or Shuuichi had taken my name? Which I daydreamed about hard growing up.” Kaito said, grinning at Shuuichi, “God I was so in love with you guys… I never wanted to make you feel helpless, with me. I guess I wanted to make you feel like equals, even if you weren’t. Listen to your thoughts, heed your requests, give you a sense of power in the relationship… I thought… I thought for a long time my own parents had that sort of relationship. Equals? But, I realize now I was just blind to a lot of things my mother was going through…”

“So, I’m glad you didn’t end up coming to Luminary, Kokichi… but man, if you had been mine? I would have just… I would have done anything, to make you happy in Luminary… and maybe none of it would have worked. You’re too smart for illusions of equality. But I really would have tried to let you feel in control of your life. Given you that control…”

Kaito shrugged “I know that doesn’t really mean anything to you in, like, reality. Even if you had come to Luminary, you wouldn’t have been mine, so even in fantasy ‘could have beens’ that’s not a comfort, if it was a comfort at all… I guess I’m just trying to say I would have loved you, Dicea or Luminary style. I would have tried to make Luminary a place you could live in…”

...despite what Kokichi had genuinely believed for a long time...when you made policy, you couldn’t rely on people being gracious or kind. It might’ve been a goal, to not flaunt that power as a head of house, but because that was left up to the individual...Kokichi would hazard a guess that there was a non-insignificant percentage of heads that didn’t give a shit about that ideal. 

And where there was a power imbalance… If you were privileged? Then it was easy to see green pastures all around you. It took effort to see the hole in the fence, the dried patches of grass, the people who watered and maintained the field. But people who didn’t share that privilege...there was no discovery. It was simply an inescapable reality. 

Kokichi sighed, sitting up and looking over at Kaito with a soft, loving look. “Hun...that means the world to me. It may not be a reasonable hypothetical...but your intent is clear. Kai-chan really cares about the people around him… In other universes? Anyone who managed to land you is the luckiest person in the world. And I just get to laugh to myself for the rest of my life that in this universe, it got to be me.”

Kokichi...knew it was kind of a horrible thing to say, so he didn’t. But Kaito really was someone special. A Luminary elite, royalty, like him? A shot in a million. Kokichi could only wish that there were others who shared his ideals. 

Kaito lit up, incredibly pleased that his attempt to express himself had actually gone over well, having kind of been waiting for Kokichi to tell him that the sentiment wasn’t enough to quell Kokichi’s disgust with Luminary. And, well… he hadn’t actually said it was enough, to be fair, but Kaito was willing to take ‘I hate Luminary, but love Kaito’ as a win, as far as their relationship went. So… success? Success! 

Now to get kisses from Shuuichi, who seemed to be slowly shifting out of his burrow- “Owwwww.” Kaito whined from the floor again, Shuuichi having caught his hip with his leg and shoved Kaito off the bed again. “I didn’t do anything!”

“Sure, you were scooting over to me entirely innocently.” The ex-detective said dryly, raising an eyebrow at Kaito, “You weren’t about to throw yourself around me again.”

“I wasn’t! … okay, maybe I was gonna nuzzle in beside you, but that’s not throwing myself at ya! Totally different!”

“Mmhm.” Shuuichi said dryly.

“You wrinkled up my paper.” Kaito complained, collecting his list, pencil and book from where it had also toppled onto the ground in the push, before going to put it all on the desk. That taken care of, Kaito went to the side of the bed and, placing his chin on the edge, looked up pathetically at Shuuichi, “Come on… let me get in the bed with you?”

“No.”

“Just a little bit? I won’t try anything! Just holding and maybe some kisses.”

“... fine. But if you get handsy, I’m kicking you off again.”

“Yes.” Kaito quietly cheered, getting in the bed beside Shuuichi and immediately putting his arms around him, kissing at his cheek before murmuring, “Mmmm… my handsome Shuuichi… you smell good...”

Shuuichi rolled his eyes, but allowed the kisses. “Honestly, Kaito…”

“Hey, Shuuichi… was there… any particular reason you didn’t daydream about marrying me?” Kaito suddenly asked, resting his chin on Shuuichi’s shoulder blade, looking up at him, “I know you weren’t attracted to people before the pollen, but… why Kaede?”

Maybe it should have been a harder question to answer than it was, but Shuuichi barely had to think about it as he said, “You’re a sexual creature, Kaito. You’re a seriously sexual creature. You’d have never been happy with me as I was. I never even really considered it a possibility… I mean, maybe if we had agreed you could sleep with other people? But, honestly, I think I might be too jealous for that to ever have worked out… I wouldn’t have wanted to share you… well.” Shuuichi laughed, glancing over at Kokichi, “I guess I still do. But it feels more natural and easy this way, then it would if you were off at bars every night with strangers.”

“And Kaede just… made me think I had a chance in a sexless marriage. She never seemed to mind that I wasn’t physically inclined. She still seemed to like me anyway… I don’t know. Maybe she did feel that way, at one point.” Shuuichi shrugged, running his hands through Kaito’s hair now, as he said, “But I’m still glad it ended up being you… even if I have to literally kick you off of me sometimes.” 

“I guess I just… I feel less weird, less… almost intrusive? I guess, is maybe the word? In your love life, because even though I absolutely still have less of a sex drive than you, at least you and I are both really into it sometimes now, instead of never being on the same page.”

Kaito grinned at this, seeming to take this as some sort of challenge, as he kissed at Shuuichi’s shoulders, gently kissing down as he said, “...You sure today isn’t a ‘same page’ day?” Kaito asked, kissing across from his shoulder blade to Shuuichi’s neck, saying into the little kisses, “I know it’s a rest day… but I’d be so gentle… treat my handsome Shuuichi like the treasure he is…”

Shuuichi was about to, almost more for the fun of it than anything else, throw Kaito off the bed again… but his stomach tightened and his heart thumped slightly at seeing Kaito kiss so close to his chest. Something that had been on the back of his mind for a few days now coming to the forefront again. 

“Hmmm.” Shuuichi hummed non-committedly. A little… nervous and uncertain, again.

Kokichi snickered softly as his partners bickered and whined, and took this time to really focus in on his painting. He wanted to spend that day keeping Shuuichi company, primarily, and Kokichi was always happy to shoot the shit with Kaito, but...with the two of them wrapped up together, it did leave him with more than enough focus to buckle down. Painting butterflies--just their wings, mainly, and not their creepy little bodies--soaring out of the grass and filling in petals swaying up into the “air”...

But he did look over with an interested gaze as Shuuichi mused on his love life. Even with Kaito at one point swearing off sex...even if it had been what Kokichi wanted and not a misunderstanding between them, it still would’ve felt...bad. Sexual needs were normal needs, and while that was no reason to pressure someone into them...Kokichi wasn’t sure if he’d have felt alright with Kaito regularly hiring people for the night. Even if it was purely physical for him. Considering how terrified he’d been when Kaito first mentioned having sex with Shuuichi to help with the pollen...yeah. He was glad Kaito wasn’t too frustrated with his sex drive, and that he had both Kokichi and Shuuichi to go to. 

Even if it was a tough gamble for Shuuichi most days. 

Kokichi looked back over, raising an eyebrow at Shuuichi’s hum, which definitely wasn’t a ‘no’. Grinning, Kokichi chuckled softly. “Hey, if you two wanna have some fun, don’t hesitate on my behalf. I’ll be here painting, able to run interference for your needs.”

Kaito chuckled, something excited in it, as he kissed the side of Shuuichi’s neck, saying to him earnestly, “See? We have the ‘Kichi seal of approval. We don’t have to take long… get you all warm and fuzzy and-”

“Shhhh…” Shuuichi shushed, patting the back of Kaito’s neck, who laughed at this, resting his head back on his shoulderblade, while Shuuichi leaned back into the pillows, sighing, “Give me a second, Kaito. This is why I keep throwing you off the bed…”

“I love you… my handsome Shuuichi…”

“Kaitoooooo.” Shuuichi sighed, patting Kaito’s absentmindedly on the back, “Shhhhh. Stop trying to woo me for, like, five seconds.”

“Okay, okay, I’ll stop talking.”

“Thank you…”

“...”

“...”

“...but you’re kinda into it, aren’t ya? I can tell when you’re not interested and when you just want me to beg for it.”

“You’re projecting your kinks onto me.”

“Nah. I am a reflector of kinks. I take what you like and send it back to you ten-fold. Face me and stare into your deepest and most unexplored desires.”

“You sound like a cryptic fairytale monster.” Shuuichi teased, before looking down at Kaito curiously, “...if I were entirely open to anything? What do you think I’d want? Just… your best guess?”

“Mmmm…” Kaito hummed, kissing Shuuichi’s cheek and the curve towards his ear, “Are you challenging me?”

“...Maybe.” Shuuichi said softly.

It was that uncertain ‘maybe’ that got Kaito’s attention, putting him onto his elbows and giving Shuuichi a curious look. Shuuichi was doing his best to look cool and aloof, but there was a certain… tension in his eyes. A slightly unnatural rigidness in his shoulders. Shuuichi was nervous about something and didn’t want to say what. Though, he was inviting Kaito to test and explore? 

...hmmm…

“‘Kichi, you sure you don’t mind? We’re not gonna be too distracting… oooh, nice butterflies, babe.” Kaito complimented, peeking over Shuuichi’s body.

For, well, mostly Shuuichi’s sake, Kokichi tried to keep his giggles silent. But for real! How was he supposed to listen to how cute his partners were and not react at all! A feat no one could accomplish!

...but if Shuuichi was trying to veer into new, uncertain territory? Then...it would go best if he was as comfortable as possible, without Kokichi looming over with background commentary. 

Some would probably be alright though. 

Kokichi perked at Kaito’s compliment, giving his butterflies an appraising look. “You think? Thanks! But yeah! I don’t mind at all, and if I do get distracted, then it’ll just be me blushing or looking over like a dope ‘cause I love you guys so much.”

“Awww, awesome. Alright! Time to do what I do best! Figure out what my partner wants!” Kaito declared, shifting onto his knees and clapping his hands together, rubbing his palms before, suddenly, looking down at himself, rubbing at his chin lightly as he said, “Oh, maybe I should… should I go clean up or…?”

Shuuichi raised an eyebrow. “Clean up what? You took a shower after training this morning.”

“Yeah, I mean, I’m just a… I’m a little fuzzy and-”

Shuuichi rolled his eyes, “Kaito, if you make me wait an hour for you to shave, I’m going to take a nap instead.”

“Okay! Master class Kaito, coming up!” Kaito said quickly, clearly trying to move past that before Shuich could change his mind. 

Looking over him, Kaito gently ran his fingers over Shuuichi’s stomach, taking a moment to check if Miya was fussing around inside-- Kaito knew it was silly, but he got somewhat less sex-focused when he knew for sure their daughter was awake. She didn’t know what was happening outside! But… still. And not feeling any kicks or presses of little hands, Kaito refocused on the dadda. Who was looking up at him with those beautiful lashes, waiting, a curious look on his face.

Kaito leaned down into the nest, giving Shuuichi a few warm, slow kisses, before saying, “Well… I’ll still argue that you want me to beg for it.”

Shuuichi raised an eyebrow, “Then beg.”

Kaito snickered, before taking a long, heavy breath, kissing against his neck as he trailed his hand into Shuuichi’s shirt, running his hand along his stomach. “Please, Shuuichi? I want to taste you… can I take off your shirt?”

“Mmmm… no?”

“What? Come on! Don’t actually make me beg for it!”

Shuuichi laughed, relaxing a little as Kaito buried his face into Shuuichi’s side, groaning. “What? You said you wanted to beg for it? What’s the fun if I just say yes the first time you ask?”

“Uuuuugh, not getting naked is not sexy.” Kaito grumbled, before kissing a little more desperately at Shuuichi’s neck and shoulder, trying to get his partner in the mood as he said, “Okay… how about now?”

“Mmmmm, no.”

More desperate kissing. “Now??”

“Hmmmm, you can take off my pants and kiss my legs a bit.”

“Awww, but I wanted your shirt-”

“Maybe I should take a nap then.”

“-Pants, got it, thank you!”

While he smiled to himself, listening to Kaito and Shuuichi go back and forth, Kokichi kept his dedication up and remained quiet, working on all the little details on the crib. He wondered what they’d do with it when Miya outgrew it… Maybe keep it around for the feelings baby, if they ended up being a baby. Maybe...just keep it as spare furniture, in case any guests needed a crib… He hoped they’d appreciate the work he put into it. 

Eventually he did look over at his partners, smirking a little as he saw Kaito divesting Shuuichi of his pants. “C’mon, Kai-chan--Shuu-chan has really nice legs, and they sure deserve some kisses. If you weren’t interested, I mean, I could come over to lavish every little part of Shuu-chan’s body in the love he deserves.”

“What? Noooo, you’re painting babe! This is myyyy Shuuichi time!” Kaito insisted, not because he didn’t want Kokich involved. He’d love to get Kokichi involved. 

But, well, because… he was doing exactly as he had promised Shuuichi he would. He was gauging what his partner wanted right now, and based on how relaxed Shuuichi was becoming, that tight, uncomfortable look fading from his face, what he wanted right now was for Kaito to make a goof of himself and be desperate and needy and, to, well… beg. 

And Kaito was willing to accomodate.

So Kaito put his arms around Shuuichi and looked pitifully down at him as he said, “I changed my mind! I really, really want to kiss your legs, handsome. Come onnnnn, don’t let ‘Kichi steal ya from me…”

Shuuichi looked up at that face and, a small tightening of excitement in his stomach and crotch, he reached up and ran a hand over Kaito’s cheek, running his thumb over his cheekbone, as he said, “I don’t know… Kokichi sounds like he’d appreciate it more…”

Kaito leaned into the hand, kissing at Shuuichi’s palm, circling his large hands around Shuuichi’s thinner wrist and pulling up into his thicker arms, as he said softly, “Please?”

Shuuichi blushed, “I guess so.”

Kaito grinned at that, looking, just, far too excited, as he took the invitation to start kissing at Shuuichi’s knees. 

The Luminary Prince kept this up for awhile, kissing up and down Shuuichi’s legs, while Shuuichi relaxed, watching mostly in amusement as Kaito seemed to lavish kissing up and down Shuuichi’s legs. Every now and again he’d go up too high, reaching for Shuuichi’s boxers, and Shuuichi would just go, “No, Kaito.” and the red head would groan and complain and go back to kissing and fondling Shuuichi’s legs.

Shuuichi was enjoying himself… but, in a moment of bravery, and when Kato had moved on to kissing and rubbing up and down his inner thighs, Shuuichi sighed and said, “I thought you were going to guess what I wanted?”

Kaito stopped, looking up with some uncertainty, “This isn’t what you want? What do you want, then? You haven't let me touch anywhere else...”

“Telling you is cheating.” Shuuichi said simply. 

Kaito frowned, considering. He had touched Shuuichi’s neck and face, mild response. No real reaction to his arms. He wasn’t letting Kaito take off any more of his clothes… “Oh? Do you want my clothes off? Off, they’re coming off right now!”

Shuuichi watched, Kaito kicking off his pants and boxers with it, and like always, marveled at just how… quickly, and seemingly effortlessly, Kaito got naked. The prince really didn’t ever seem even slightly uncomfortable, being the only naked person in the room, and Kaito grinned as he stretched back, showing himself off, searching Shuuichi’s face… before frowning. “Oh, come on? It wasn’t that either?”

“You look great, Kaito.”

“Great? Just great? Well, now I’m insulted…” Kaito pouted, but was still rushing in his thoughts. Shuuichi was looking for something specific, but was afraid of asking for it. What was it, what was… oh.

Oh!

Kokichi snickered but didn’t even make a move to get up, not even putting down the siding he was working on. Kaito and Shuuichi were more than capable of having a good time by themselves...but the occasional commentary was fun. Giving Shuuichi another avenue for teasing, boosting his husband’s ego with compliments…

That ended up being the next thing out of Kokichi’s mouth, since his partners had both seemed pleased and at ease with Kaito lavishing love on Shuuichi’s legs. Hearing that Kaito was going to strip--though he only had pants on in the first place--Kokichi turned, his cheeks going pink but his lips stretching into a grin. And...hoping it wouldn’t take too much out of the mood, Kokichi left out a wolf whistle, giving Kaito a wink before he turned back. 

He...didn’t really know what Shuuichi was looking for either, but an excuse to look at Kaito’s butt was an attempt Kokichi would appreciate nonetheless. 

Kaito laughed, looking over and giving a wink to Kokichi, once again stretching himself back a little, trying to show himself off more, when Shuuichi’s legs went up and, using his ankle, he tilted Kaito’s head back to himself. Getting the prince’s attention again, with a small, self-satisfied smile, Shuuichi said softly, “Focus, Kaito…”

Kaito grinned, “Man, you are the jealous type. It’s alright, I’m all yours right now. You don’t have to share me with anyone, handsome…”

“Who’s jealous? I’m not jealous. We’re juts going to be at this all day if you keep getting distracted, Kait-hah!”

Kaito wasn’t taking Shuuichi’s shirt off. He had a feeling that, at the moment, that was part of it. And, maybe, he should have asked… but, the fact that Shuuichi kept saying he wanted Kaito to guess?

Well, he supposed worst came to worst, Shuuichi would throw him off the bed again and Kaito would spend some time apologizing. But for now… he just stared up at Shuuichi’s face as, through the shirt, he placed small kisses against Shuuichi’s chest, having moved quickly up, not wanting Shuchi to get caught up in his head watching Kaito approach. And, well... He wasn’t sure if this was working just yet. 

Shuuichi looked alarmed, but… more just in a… well, Kaito wasn’t actually sure. Shuuichi didn’t look upset, but he did look… a bit overwhelmed. 

So, Kaito slowed down, keeping his kisses to the base and outer parts. Not saying anything, just closing his eyes and making himself as loose and easy to move off as possible as he kissed around the base of his partners chest. 

Shuuichi watched him do this for awhile, not saying anything… before saying quietly, “Okay. You can take my shirt off now.”

“I can?”

“...yeah.”

“Okay… help me out here, handsome?”

Working together, the two of them wrangled Shuuichi out of his simple black t-shirt, Kaito tossing it off the bed without a thought, before looking down at Shuuichi, admiring. Shuuichi, honestly, didn’t have that much of a chest, though he knew that didn’t mean much to his body shy partner. And Kaito understood. If he started developing breasts tomorrow, now matter how small or unobtrusive? Kaito would probably feel a little body shy for awhile too. It was hard, being used to and comfortable with yourself, only for yourself to just suddenly change. Fuck, that’s why it sucked so hard to be a pre-teen. Body changes were hard on anyone.

Kaito thought they were cute, though. Soft, small round flushes of tissue, ended in little pink nipples that seemed to melt into the rest of the breast, not so much ‘points’ but more just the ends and peaks of Shuuichi’s breasts. They were swollen with nectar, and Kaito assumed that someday, when that was no longer the case, they’d probably sag and overlap a bit, but for now, the chests held firmly in place, undaunted by gravity.

Maybe one day Kaito would have a serious talk with Shuuichi about surgeries. Kaito was convinced there was no fixing everything-- those hips weren’t exactly going to narrow again any time soon-- and, while personally, he’d rather Shuuichi didn’t do anything like that, he still wanted his partner to know that if he really hated his more traditionally feminine features now, Kaito would support him getting his more masculane body back. That there’d be no judgement, if Shuuichi really, couldn’t stand it.

But, for now?

“Can I keep kissing your chest, handsome?” Kaito asked softly.

“I don’t know.” Shuuichi said softly back. Back and shoulders tense, but face flushed. “Convince me.”

Kokichi looked over in slight alarm as Shuuichi’s voice caught, and for a few tense moments, he wasn’t...exactly sure what was going on. But when Kaito took off Shuuichi’s shirt, and the soft words between them… Kokichi sighed softly, turning back to his painting with a soft smile. 

This...to his knowledge, at least, was the first time Shuuichi had let--and to a point, encouraged--Kaito touch his chest. While he had had permission for a while, Kokichi never really did much with Shuuichi’s chest, knowing that, of all parts of his body, it was certainly one of the less comfortable areas for his boyfriend. So Kokichi maybe gave a few kisses, didn’t hesitate when he ran his hands over Shuuichi’s body, but...had never focused on it. 

Opening that permission up to Kaito now… Kokichi was really proud for Shuuichi. He’d come a long way. And hopefully it would result in something that felt real good now.

Kaito didn’t go back immediately to the chest, because Shuuichi had asked to be convinced. So he kept kissing around different parts of Shuuichi, before coming up and kissing him directly, the two just quietly making out for awhile, while Kaito gently ran his hands over him, up his leg, over his stomach…

Another small shudder, as Kaito’s hands ran lightly over a breast, just ever so slight feather light touches, dancing lightly over Shuuichi’s nipple, which seemed to harden against the brief touch, as if his body were trying to get closer to Kaito on it’s own as Kaito whispered, “Can I now?”

“U-uh… hmmm… I don’t k-kno-hm.” Shuuichi closed his eyes as Kaito started to kiss at his neck, still giving those feather light touches, Shuuichi excited by this but sort of… embarrassed by how excited he was, not really wanting to be this affected- “Ah! Ah…”

Kaito bit and pressed against Shuuichi’s neck for a bit, before saying, “Now? Please, Shuuichi?”

“...Okay… if you really want to…” Shuuichi said, and barely before the words were out, he shuddered again, his groin tightening as Kaito immediately started running his hands over Shuuichi’s chest, still kissing him, now pushing his tongue in, trying to somewhat distract him in case his nerves got the better of him as he ran his hands up and down the small lumps, pressing his fingers around them and smiling into his kiss. His hands were bigger than them… he liked that. He wasn’t sure why. 

Gently, he squeezed. Stimulus wise, he knew this by itself wouldn’t do much, but for the thrill of the excitement of being touched? He played with them, not aggressively, not wanting to embarrass Shuuichi by being too forward or, maybe even worse, immature with them. But he did run his fingers up and down them a bit, before squeezing them again, enjoying that small, “Hnn.” sound that escaped his partner every now and again.

Moving his thumb, index finger, and middle finger into tips, he laughed as Shuuichi shivered, Kaito now playing with the nipples, running the hard, bulbous points between his fingers, before saying to Shuuichi, his voice suddenly slightly harder, “I’m going to put my mouth on them, handsome.”

Shuuichi opened his eyes, his face flushed red, a little startled at the change in tone. What had happened to begging? “...are you.” he said simply. Not really a question, but not a protest either. Just slightly curious at the change in tone.

“Mmmhm… gonna finally taste you… I’ve wanted to for so long. I love every part of you… gonna make you cum like a god damn faucet.”

Shuuichi laughed. He couldn’t help it. “I don’t know what tone you’re going for right now.”

“I’m too happy to be consistent, Shuuichi! Please? I know I said I was just gonna, but I’d feel better if you said I could…”

“...” Shuuichi suddenly frowned. Saying entirely seriously, “I’m going to push you off if I get scared.”

“Okay.” Kaito agreed, giving him another small kiss.

“I mean it. Don’t scare me.”

“I promise I’ll try. I never want to hurt you. You can push me off if you get scared. You can just tell me to stop too and I will, okay? I promise.”

“...Okay.”

The strange, almost jokey back and forth helped Shuuichi calm down a little again… but once again he felt himself alarmed, breathing heavier, as Kaito kissed around his breasts, before coming up to one of his nipples, placing light, soft kisses- “Ah. Aaaaa…”

Kaito closed his eyes and focused, moving his hand down Shuuichi’s leg and shoving his hand into his partners boxers, he took the length of Shuuichi’s dick into his hand and started to rub up and down it. Sucking and teasing at Shuuichi’s nipples as he did so, listening to the pleasant sounds of Shuuichi, both pleasured and alarmed, reacting stronger and stronger to Kaito’s touches.

“Kaito, Kaito, stop.” Shuuichi said quickly, now more than alarmed.

And Kaito did. He pulled back, licking his lip, before saying softly to Shuuichi, “I don’t mind it. I like it.”

“It’s… it’s weird…”

“Does it feel bad?”

“...no…”

“Tastes like honey to me. And your whole body shuddered when it started. I can feel you, handsome, you’re almost done. You sure you don’t want me to keep going? I don’t think it’s weird. I like it. I love you. I love you so much… I can just focus on your dick, if you want me too, though? It’s okay. Either way, I’m happy...I love you so much… I just want to make you happy…”

“...” Shuuichi looked away, flushing bright red. “...you can stop if it’s gross.”

“I don’t think it is. Do you want me to keep going?”

“...yeah…”

Shuuichi shuddered and whined as Kaito went back to work, spilling against his tongue and dripping down the side of his chest, as all the while Kaito kept pumping at his dick. Vaguely, Shuuichi knew Kokichi was still in the room. Just as vaguely, he had the fear that he was embarrassing himself in front of him… but Kaito’s attention could be intoxicating, and he got lost in the sensation, until-

“Oh, please, please, please-”

Kaito grinned, just hurrying the pace of his wrist, and then slowing it when Shuuichi’s whole body spasmed, something- ha, ‘something’- spilling onto Kaito’s hand and down his wrist, while Kaito just slowly continued to massage there, easing up little by little as Shuuichi’s body calmed down.

“...heh… made you all sticky everywhere, huh?”

“Sh-shut up...mmmm…” Shuuichi sighed, body finally relaxing again, resting against the pillows. “...that was… that was… not as bad as I was afraid of.”

“You are determined to just devastate my ego today, huh?”

“It was good… I liked it… I’m sorry if I was weird.”

“Never. Never. I love you. Anything I can ever do for you? It’s yours. I’m always yours. I’m always yours, Shuuichi.”

“...okay… thank you…” Shuuichi caught his breath, giving Kaito a long look, warm and something slightly worn down in his gaze, though he seemed pretty content with it, “...can you get my shirt back?”

“On it!”

-

When Kaito had mentioned grabbing coffee, Thalia hadn’t thought it’d literally be the next day, but...well, she did have enough time to schedule a lunch break that was more than enough time to chat. About whatever the fuck it was the prince wanted. 

He’d said to meet at the castle, so that’s just what Thalia did, standing in the entry hall, looking around a bit. ...it was much...warmer than the Nohran manor. Way, way busier, even though her mother had always welcomed people in to talk about whatever matters they needed. Despite all the busy-ness...it was comforting. Something nice about not being on anyone’s radar, just another face in the crowd. 

She wondered if her father had ever come to sing for the Dicean castle…

Spotting a shock of red hair come down the stairs, Thalia gave the prince a polite nod. “Hey. Did you have a plan for where to go, or is anywhere good?”

“If you have a preference, anywhere’s good!” Kaito said cheerfully, giving her a bright grin, just, in a fantastic mood. It hadn’t been that long ago now that he had left Shuuichi happy and content and spent, and fuck, Kaito was a little horny still, but that was okay! He was riding that wave! Everything seemed so much brighter and more exciting, when he felt like this. Full of energy!

“My partner, Shuuichi, he’s more the cafe guy than I am. I’m usually a bar guy, and our Kokichi, when we go out, he really seems to dig the restaurants so far. I think it’s a bit of novelty, still, for him… but! It’s a little early in the day for drinks, and I don’t know if you drink anyway… Coffee?”

“Coffee,” Thalia nodded. “There’s a drink place just outside the plaza. Outdoor seating, but I don’t know if you’d wanna walk and talk or settle somewhere. I don’t have to be back at work for a while, so as long as you don’t have an itch to go see the orchard…” She shrugged before starting to lead the way.

Like usual, her hair was zipped up in her jacket, a sort of bomber style with a lotus applique on the back, a few other assorted patches here and there. She put her hands in her pockets, at ease with just walking to the small shop, but...well. This was a social thing. 

“...you guys seem pretty settled. Been about half a year, but you never really know, I guess. How’s Dicea been for you?”

“Mmmm…” Kaito laughed, following her step for step, perfectly content to let her lead to the shop she had in mind, “It’s a beautiful day, sitting outside could be super nice, if you’re not going to be too hot in that jacket. I’m up for it!”

“And… Dicea… heh, I don’t know. Good? It’s good! It’s…” It was so far, the absolute worst, and absolute best, time of his life, which sort of gave him a painted view of Dicea in general… but that felt too personal to say to this relative stranger before they had so much as had a coffee together, not stone-cold sober, so he said, “...different! Challenging. Which can be both a good and a bad thing, ya know? I’m sure you know.”

“What about you? I think someone mentioned you’ve been here a year, right? Seriously, the way I hear things, becoming the head gardner in Usott’s biggest garden attraction? After a year of living here? That’s seriously impressive! You’ve been adjusting well here then, I imagine?”

It took a great deal of will not to roll her eyes. If it got too hot, she could just take her jacket off. She wasn’t a child, and dressing herself wasn’t just for fashion...geez. 

But the man had reached out to her, so...try to be civil. 

“It’s not bad,” she agreed with a nod. “Things have taken some getting used to, but I tend to keep to myself so it doesn’t get me into trouble. Could do without people yakkin’ about their life stories just to ask about any new bulbs we’re putting in…” The young woman huffed, allowing herself to roll her eyes this time. “People get way too comfortable way too fast here.”

Shrugging a bit, Thalia veered to head towards the drink shop, luckily only one person in line, it seemed like. “I have a lot of free time. Couldn’t spend it all just sulking in my apartment, so I got into the gardening scene and...considering how often I’m there anyway, all the others said I’d be a good candidate, since Miss Hijiri was leaving. I think everyone would’ve tried to vote her in for another year otherwise.” 

“Can you do that? Vote someone in twice? I’ll be honest, I get a little confused by the whole process. Do people change out every year just because it’s a super pursued job? I mean… I’d imagine it is. If everyone else has to settle for volunteer work, whoever gets to do it full time probably is a bit envied by everyone around them… Still, it’s awesome that they voted you in! I doubt it was just because you were available, I’m sure you’ve got some skill. People talk about the gardeners here like they talk about mayors and stuff back at home. Like, it’s a really respected position here.”

Getting to the front of the line, Kato waited for Thalia to put her order in first, and then, after putting in his own order, “Hey, let me get this one for both of us. I’ll pay, I mean, since you were nice enough to just take me up on my request out of nowhere.”

“From what I can tell, like...no one can stop you. If all of the volunteers are okay with it, who’s gonna say, oh, no, you can’t vote the person you all want, sorry,” she huffed. “But it does seem kind of like a bad manners thing to do. The intent is to keep bringing in new blood to keep innovating, looks like. Personally, I just think a lot of people don’t want the hassle of keeping up with the bookkeeping.”

Thalia looked a little surprised for a moment when Kaito stopped her from bringing out her purse, but...well, hey. Who was she to turn down a treat from royalty? Even if Dicean royalty didn’t seem much different from the average person. “Knock yourself out, dude.”

Waiting for their drinks--Thalia just got a drip coffee, effective but wouldn’t keep her up at night--didn’t take long and the two opted to take one of the quaint, round tables outside of the shop. Stretching her legs out to the side, Thalia took a sip and raised an eyebrow at her companion. 

“...so. I know you’re not trying to get some, so what did you want to talk to me about?”

“Ah, well… I did really think it’d be interesting to talk to someone else new to the area! But, you’re right, that’s not the primary reason I asked you out here,” Kaito admitted, sipping at his own mocha, enjoying the rare sweet treat… well, besides his partners. Mmmm… maybe he should have gotten something he could put honey in… damn, was it too late to go and get a new drink?

Focus! Focus.

“I was actually-- and, forgive me if this is way too presumptuous-- but I was wondering if you happened to know much of anything about the plants over in the Dead Forest, out at the Danganronpa border?” Kaito sipped at his mocha, sighing a bit, “It’s fine if you don’t, I know it’s presumptuous, like I said. God knows I don’t have all the damn random plants in Luminary memorized just because I come from there. But, well, I figured since you were someone that likes to garden… We can’t seem to get any info on the things from Danganronpa themselves. Information ban, or something like that. I was wondering if you happened to know any trivia on them?”

For a moment, there was pure, honest surprise on Thalia’s face, a sort of openness in her expression that didn’t occur too often. 

...you’re okay. She can’t hear you. 

Thalia took a slow sip of her coffee, though there was still something...uncomfortable in her expression. “...you’re talking about the Despair Poppies. Considering how open information is here…” There seemed to be a war in her expression for a moment. “...how much do you know already?”

Kaito watched her expression. The conflict in it.

He sipped at his mocha. Still kind of wished he could put honey in it.

When he lowered the mug, he grinned at her warmly. “We’re expecting a little baby girl in a few months. No, I lie, not even that. A month and a half. I’m very happy about this… but I’d still like to know why.” Kaito paused to consider his words, before clarifying, “I guess, more… why that forest hasn’t been burnt to the ground, already.”

Thalia’s expression hardened, though there was something desperate about it. Izais had taught all her children magic. Had explained to them exactly what dark magic was, what it took. But even Gaius with his neat trick of channeling electricity through his arm outclassed her there. Thalia could separate herself from the queen and make plants grow well. That was it. 

No memory manipulation for her. 

There weren’t people lingering around them, and even the shop was out of earshot unless you were speaking loudly, but even then Thalia lowered her voice. “Kaito...don’t play games with this. I’ll tell you what I can, for the sake of your daughter, but I need to know what you know already. I can’t…”

She sighed, glancing around, as if that was even close to how the hivemind might appear. It’d been so long, she barely remembered it. “...there’s a reason that information hasn’t leaked to other countries. I can’t...talk freely about it all.”

...even if his daughter was going to be a Flora...she couldn’t just drop all that on some fool who didn’t even know magic was something outside of fairytales. 

Kaito couldn’t help but follow her gaze, wondering who she was looking for. Was there a chance they were being watched? In Dicea? A gardener and… well, sure, a prince of Luminary, but that was still a pretty random person to just be watching. At least in this context. 

Kaito sipped his mocha some more, eyeing her curiously. She seemed nervous. Like… genuinely nervous. 

“...I guess I know what anyone in Dicea can know right now, honestly,” Kaito said, deciding he couldn’t see a reason to not just be honest about this. “Despair Poppies… me and my family called it pollen for a long, long time… they grow from the silver vines in the burnt-looking forest on the Danganronpa border. A bunch of trees with these brittle, black bark on them. They weren’t supposed to be… active? I guess is a word for it? When my party went through I guess… ten months? Eleven months ago now, but we either got poor information or just plain old unlucky, and most of us were exposed to it.”

“Usual symptoms. Irrational behavior, fever that got worse every day. Thankfully one of our secretaries worked with our healer and they managed to cure it. But, my boyfriend… was exposed again to it. Consistently, for a long time. Once again, irrational behavior, but this time, no fever. And over time, his body changed. Before it, he wasn’t able to have children, and after it, he was. I think he only didn’t get the fever because he was exposed to extremely low doses while he was getting them. Until he was cleared of the pollen… sorry, the poppies, entirely? Extreme personality changes that went away, but the physical stuff… sorry, sorry, too much information. So, from his situation, that’s what I know so far...”

Sipping at his mocha again, Kaito said, quieter, “And I don’t know this, but I… suspect that there’s a way to dose someone with it for a lot longer than that, with no fever, and no noticeable body changes… though I don’t know why someone would do that. I think that’s another reason why I want more information on this. Why would… what are the benefits, to secretly giving someone small doses, over a long period of time? What does anyone stand to gain?”

Thalia sighed softly as Kaito explained, though...there was something of a worried expression on her face as he told about the Luminary Party going through the Dead Woods and getting hit with the poppies. It was public news that the Party had gone missing… Was some idiot hoping to dose, what, over a hundred humans and just...hope they’d make it back, after being in another country?! What a moron, dangerous move if it was intentional…

...he didn’t know about Flora. So the non-magic explanation it was. 

Giving Kaito a somewhat tired look, Thalia sighed again. “...you have that program in Luminary, don’t you? You know what people stand to gain from slaves.”

Thalia brushed a hand through her bangs, looking slightly off into the distance, her voice lowered. “The poppies are used as a sort of drug… In bigger doses, then stuff like what happened here with the cult happens. But in smaller, heavily controlled doses...it makes a person incredibly fertile. Able to conceive without too many tries, and lets them have a lot of kids. With someone who’s bred really carefully with the poppies? My mom said she heard of people having around forty kids in their lives. The personality changes just tend to make it harder for them to fight back. Making them want the changes, or making them just generally subservient…”

A bit of her hair had fallen out of her jacket. Thalia never really hid it on purpose, she wore it this way back in Danganronpa too, but...about the last foot of her hair was a lovely soft, pinkish red color, naturally fading into the ashy blond. Frowning, she twirled the escaped bit around her fingers. “...my dad took poppies. But...he chose it. He and my mom really loved each other...they wanted kids, and my mom can’t have ‘em so...he volunteered. There are medicines in Danganronpa that can...help with the worst of the poppy symptoms. Lets people keep their minds. For a long time, that’s just...how I thought things were. That everyone on poppies had chosen it because they wanted kids.”

Her eyes narrowed. “...instead, most people treat people on poppies like livestock. So...if someone was quietly dosed without any changes? And none of the changes really happen until someone hits puberty anyway...then they were being prepared to be a breeding slave.”

… Kaito wished he hadn’t felt that shock of fear and repulsion, but he had.

He swallowed it down and tried not to let it show on his face. It didn’t matter. He didn’t care. Nothing had ended up happening. Nothing had happened. 

Instead, he just gave her what he hoped was a serious and calm look, nodding as she explained, though the next sip of mocha he took was a little shaky. Okay… that was a… that was a little heavy. All of that. Okay.

Good.

He needed to know.

Taking a breath, he said, “Thank you… for being honest with me, I mean. That’s an… that has to be an incredibly difficult secret for Danganronpa to keep… but why are they keeping it? Is it a common practice there, or is the country just trying to save themselves from, well… the publicity scandal of it? Why…” Kaito frowned, “Why even have… ‘breeding’ slaves? What population needs someone who can have… up to forty kids?” 

Kaito’s next chuckle felt hollow and strange, but he didn’t want to alarm Thalia, and he joked lightly, “I only have one kid and another on the way, and I already feel swamped in children. Why not just do things the natural way?”

...it felt good to tell someone that. Sure everyone back home had hated it, but...what could they do? Even if they could block themselves off from the hivemind, if they tried to challenge Queen Enoshima directly? They’d be husks before they even took a step. ...or maybe set on fire in the middle of the city as a warning. That seemed more like the bitch’s style…

Crossing her arms on the table, Thalia nodded and gave a sigh. “Apparently, like...two thousand years ago? There was some sort of incident in Danganronpa--but don’t even ask me about it because I have no idea what it was,” she prefaced, giving Kaito a dry look. “But because of that incident, anyone who was descended from the people that lived through that are infertile. A large percentage of the Ronpan population are like that, so, initially, using the poppies was a way to keep the population going.”

“But now?” Thalia rolled her eyes with aplomb. “Now? When Danganronpa is twice the size of the next biggest country on the continent, and still bigger than the other three combined? Now it’s just because Queen Enoshima is a crazy, racist bitch. Danganronpa doesn’t need three kids for every citizen, but she thinks anyone who can’t trace their bloodline back two thousand years is nothing but trash and is only worth even sharing space on the planet to become a baby machine,” the woman practically growled, showing a hint of the temper her family was infamous for. 

Scoffing hard, she spat into a nearby flower pot, clearly showing what she thought of their queen. Then, she sighed. Long resigned to a horrible reality. She wasn’t Virgil, off on a wild goose-chase for power to beat the queen at her own game, and she wasn’t Danny, disrupting slave trades and making small differences on a personal level. She wasn’t Gaius, making his own little world with as many people as he could safely fit, taking after their mother in his own way. She was just Lythalia, who’d run away. 

“...it’s a secret because if other countries banded together to take over Danganronpa, they’d win. And no one can talk about it, because the queen would have us killed...or worse.”

Kaito nodded again. Okay… okay…

“Hey!” Kaito grinned, looking briefly genuinely delighted as he said, “My country isn’t the only piece of shit on the planet anymore! Awesome! Man, it is nice to know we’re in competition and not just, like, the sole reigning champs! Ha!”

Chuckling a little, Kaito sobered up a bit as he said, “Sorry, I’m just… I’m a little blown away by all this. But I understand how serious what you’re telling me is. Okay… so, this is a secret that could put you and, I’m assuming, yours, in danger. Like, you telling me this? This is a personal risk.” Kaito nodded, sipping at the mocha again, mostly to give himself a moment to pause and think. “...If I could promise this information would never come back to you, that I would never tell who told me, would that mean anything to you? Or is the Danganronpa system efficient enough or ruthless enough that you’d still likely be in danger?”

Thalia gave the prince a dry look. It was the worst competition in the world--hey, who can exploit their people in worse and worse ways?!

“...honestly, I’m surprised you’re even believing me. But because of your partner and your daughter, I… I’m willing to speak.” Thalia took a quick, steeling breath. Just because it was cathartic to tell someone, didn’t mean it wasn’t terrifying. And while for the most part he would be fine raising his daughter, not really any difference raising a Flora from a human--or from any other species a seedling had boned with, reportedly--maybe...she could...try and reach out to the child. Help her block herself off from the hivemind so it’d never be an issue...hopefully before the queen noticed. 

Thalia shuddered slightly. But… 

“I’ve been in danger from the moment I figured out the queen was full of shit,” she sighed. “Luckily, living in Dicea is...quite a bit more protection than most people get. But no matter what, I’m in danger.”

Suddenly, the woman looked tired. “...I’m no good at fighting. My mom didn’t want me to leave the estate...but I couldn’t stand living there. My brothers have all left, dad died years ago...it’s just mom and the staff with people from town popping in every now and then. I want to live my own life, danger and all.”

“...that said, I’d appreciate if you didn’t tell anyone you heard this from me. Every precaution helps, I think.”

Kaito nodded firmly. “I promise. I’m not even really sure who I should tell anyway, but… it’ll never come back on you. And, if you ever find yourself needing it? I’m a pretty decent fighter, and I know a lot of better ones. And the castle is always a refuge for people who need it. You can count on my help, if you ever need it.”

Rubbing the back of his neck, Kaito put down his mocha and groaned, “Everything’s always so weird… okay… okay… Danganronpa has a weird, super aggressive fertility slavery program… that the death cultists were using for whatever reason… probably its personality effects were useful, if I had to guess right now… There’s non harmful ways to use it. Like your parents did. Interesting to know, though I doubt I’ll ever use that bit of info… Hmmm… You're the child of a guy like my partner? Bunch of siblings?”

Leaning back against the table, Kaito suddenly looked grim. “...Are there any medical issues I should be looking out for, for my daughter? The doctors helping us with this are trying their best, but they’re working on almost no information, sort of discovering this from the ground up. Anything I can prepare for, medical wise, that might come up for my daughter? I… if there’s something common, like deformities or anything like that, I’d rather be prepared to support it before she ever gets here. What’s my worst case scenario?”

Maybe Kaito could clean up her ashes...but it still felt nice to have someone declare themself an ally. And who knew? Missy was a human, and Danny seemed to approve of her, as much as he ever openly approved of anyone. 

Thalia sat back, the worst of her piece said, and she nodded as she sipped at her drink, just...marveling at the weirdness. Bunch of ridiculous shit if she ever saw some…

...but there were some nice things to come out of it. Thalia was happy to be alive, and Kaito seemed to already have a soft spot for his daughter. Giving the soon-to-be dad a softer look, Thalia smirked. “Honestly? From what I’ve heard, those of us born this way do pretty well. Like...I’m pretty sure one of my brothers is an alcoholic, but that’s sure not from biological stuff.”

“Your worst case is probably getting old man tired running after a kid that’s fit as a fiddle.”

Kaito sighed, “Good… good…” a genuine sense of relief filling him. Considering the extremely… weird nature of her being born, Kaito had almost thought that some sort of… well, something, was going to show up. But to know that it was common for kids born like this to be healthy? Good…

“I’ll be honest, I don’t know what to do with any of this,” Kaito confessed, finishing off the last of his coffee, “But I’m glad I asked. The more you know, right? Thank you, again, Thalia.”

True, Thalia could be lying about all of this… but Kaito got a good vibe from her. A sort of gut instinct. And, as someone who followed his first impressions almost to the point of stupidity, Kaito was willing to give her the benefit of the doubt on all of this, no matter how wild or outlandish.

Kaito looked at Thalia warmly, genuinely appreciative… before saying, “Hey, your hair… for one, that’s awesome. For two, is that natural? Are characteristics like that something we should expect from our Miyako, or is that purely a coincidence?”

Thalia nodded a bit. Izais had never been a supporter of the queen, and she made sure to teach her children all she knew of the world early on. But...there wasn’t much just an average person could do about it, and Thalia had no delusions about herself like some of her brothers. 

Smiling a bit, Thalia unzipped her jacket, showing off the full gradation of color before she smoothed it all together to zip back up. “It’s natural, yeah. For some reason it is kind of common for people like me to have weird hair or eye,” or other features, “colors. Like...my two oldest brothers? Identical twins, except the younger one had red hair like our dad. We teased the shit out of him when it looked like he was going grey at 17,” she snickered, “but really? It turned out that it just turned to the blond the rest of us have. I’ve met a few people who have, like, the tops of their eyes one color and the bottoms another too. I think it’s something to do with the specific mixing of DNA, but I don’t really know why that’s the case.”

“Ooooh… awwww, my Miyako, getting all these strange color possibilities.” Kaito grinned, looking genuinely excited. “I’m so excited… I’m hoping she comes out looking like Shuichi or Kokichi, if I’m totally honest. Like, that she’s just so clearly theirs, ya know? My little girl… sorry, sorry, I’m getting sentimental.” Kaito laughed, shaking his head and finishing his coffee, putting it down with a satisfied sigh.

“Life is weird,” he said again, leaning back into his chair. “...ah well… Do you drink, Thalia? We should do this again sometime, hit up a pub or sit down at a bar. You seem fun to hang out with. Also, would it be alright for me to pick your brain in the future, about this poppy stuff? I feel like I should have more questions, but... Honestly, I still kinda need to process everything you just said. It’s… kind of a lot.”

“Is there anything I can do for you, while you have me?” Kaito asked, “Besides the safety of the castle during difficult times, I’m afraid there’s not a lot I can offer, personally… but if anything comes to mind, feel free to ask. I feel like I owe you.”

Thalia smirked a little. She was the youngest of the group, but she remembered her brothers telling her about how mushy their parents had been over her and Gaius’ births. Just excited parent things, she supposed. 

“I don’t really drink often,” she shrugged, “But if it’s socially, I’m not a straight-edge or anything. I wouldn’t mind sittin’ down with you again sometime. I’ll do my best to answer what I can about the poppies, but it’s not like I had a pot of them back home.”

Thalia paused there before her eyebrows raised, something occurring to her. “Oh, I’m guessing you guys aren’t trying to plant your own garden of them, but you won’t have to worry about Miyako being poisoned or affected by poppies. Folks like us are immune.”

Luckily. Some Flora were already crazy enough without having to worry about poppy exposure. 

Sighing, Thalia swirled the last of her coffee in her cup, taking a last swig. “...other than not telling people you got this from me?” She thought for a moment before smirking. “Have a talk with your kids about being careful in the gardens.”

Kaito laughed sheepishly, “Yeah… that’s my bad. I’ll talk to them.”

-

Shuichi made it, but halfway there, you could see the regret in his face, and by the time they sat down in her office, he looked wary and tired, a little miserable.

As Kokichi and Kaito went to their own seats, Dr. Mariah looked Shuichi over, frowning a little… before saying curtly, “Wait here. I shall return with some tea.”

“You don’t have to-annd, she’s gone.” Shuichi sighed, adjusting the brim of his hat as he said, “Well, here we are again… this shit is hard. Why do we do this again?”

“Safety, happiness, and responsibility.” Kaito immediately quoted, before laughing at himself a little, “And to keep me out of the shrine and Kokichi out of the closet.”

“I don’t have a hiding space, I should be able to skip therapy.”

“You hide in your mind.” Dr. Mariah said, coming back with a silver tray of china cups, bringing it over to the hanging shelf by the filing cabinet, pouring four cups of tea, a warm, strange scent filling the room, “Which is understandable. Unlike your partners, you didn’t have the luxury of being allowed to hide, growing up. And hiding away in your mind… I’m not even sure if it’s a flaw, yet, as far as communication goes. Not all coping techniques we teach ourselves growing up are inherently destructive. I need more time with you to make a judgment on that either way. Here.”

Shuich took the tea she offered him, watching her bring a cup for Kaito and Kokichi as well, before looking at it warily, “What is it?”

“Oolong tea from the country of Othain, over on the Attica continent. Brewed cleanly, it’ll clear your mind and up your energy. Think of it as a cleaner caffeine.”

With a quiet thanks, Kokichi took his tea, breathing in the unfamiliar scent and “ooh”ing softly over its origins before smiling over at Shuuichi. “If it’s up your alley, think we should look into getting some ourselves? It might be nice to still have a warm, nice energy drink while you’re on coffee hold.”

Kokichi held his journal in his lap but took the time to judge the tea for himself. It was kinda fruity, floral, light… He nodded in approval, cupping his hands around the teacup to warm his joints. He hadn’t been particularly achy or anything, but...just kind of all of him hurt all the time these days. 

“...are there kinda rule of thumb signs you can look out for to see if a coping mechanism is healthy or not? I mean...some of them are kind of obvious, but, well...like for Shuu-chan, there needs to be an understanding of context and nuance to get an idea about it. Are there any things we...I could keep in mind to notice a poor habit starting? I suppose as it pertains to my partners…”

“I understand the question, and for what you asked, the answer is extremely simple.” She said, sitting down in her leather chair with her own small tea cup, watching with some amusement as Kaito sipped at his tea carefully, like he was afraid he’d gulp it all down too soon, the cup very small in his larger hands. “If the coping technique causes harm yourself, or to others. Then it’s an issue.”

Sipping at her cup, she continued, “Usually, the real challenge is recognizing the type of harm, both for yourself and for others. Destruction, to yourself or others, can be… subtle. And because people are so biased towards the comforts of their own coping techniques, the more nuanced and subtle the destruction, the harder it can be to convince someone that anything needs to change.”

“Some signs you should look for.” She said, lowering the cup on her lap, “Does your coping technique isolate you? Long term, and if not, then what is your standard for ‘long term’. Would you use the same standard for others? Does your coping technique keep you from taking care of yourself? Are your basic needs being met, are your bills being paid, are you clean? Cleanliness is a strong indicator of if a coping technique has gone wrong. Ever seen a ‘depression nest’?” She sighed, shaking her head a little, “Peoples homes, where they spend their time, layered in filth, covered in junk, destructed in a way that an afternoon of effort would fix it, but left destroyed for sometimes months… that’s usually a strong indication that something has gone wrong, mentally or emotionally. But very few people living in these situations can recognize it for the warning sign that it is. Sometimes they find ways to justify it to themselves, but most of the time, they literally just don’t even notice the state they're in until someone points it out to them…”

Kaito was about to say that he was pretty sure none of them counted for that last one, but… he frowned, looking over to his partners, “Do you guys think the state my shrine was in counts as that?”

“Considering at worst, the blood is supposed to ‘maybe’ dribble on the table, and yours was on the walls?” Shuichi shrugged, “Maybe, yeah. Not being allowed to clean it until Puridician doesn’t help though, so I don’t know if that counts..”

“Yeah… maybe…”

Kokichi frowned a bit, absorbing Dr. Mariah’s words. Hiding in the closet was isolation, and even though at most he maybe spent a few hours in there, mostly because he had fallen asleep, Kokichi didn’t really need to observe it more to know that it wasn’t a healthy way to deal with stress. Sleeping was hiding in another way, though it also prevented him from taking care of himself...but Kokichi would argue that the mess his room had been in was less a coping mechanism and more just because he enjoyed the mess. Even now he was a little disappointed when their clothes scattered across the room were gathered up and put in the hamper. 

But...okay. Isolation and not being able to take care of yourself or your life…

Kokichi paled a little at the mention of blood on the walls of Kaito’s shrine, shuddering at the thought, but he swallowed another sip of tea, steadying himself. “You did end up getting it fixed, but I think the gouge and crack in the wall weren’t very good signs either…”

“Yeah… I mean, I’m keeping it clean now.”

“Are you mentally in a better place now, than you were when it was in its worst shape?”

“I was on a mind altering drug, when it was at its worst. I tried to kidnap Kokichi and Shuichi and I… think I had vague plans to steal a ship? It gets kinda confused and fuzzy, at some points.”

“Let’s call that unusual circumstances then. Probably not an indicator of greater habits.”

“Mmm… anything else?”

“Then there’s the more obvious ones. Does it physically cause harm to yourself or others. Alcoholism, cutting, food disorders are some examples of self harm, beatings, screaming, mocking or controlling tendencies are examples of harm to others. Most behavior, when performed under stress, is some form of coping technique. Even, or, especially, some of our most reprehensible behaviors as people. Your anger issues, for example, Kaito. Getting into violent altercations when you’re upset is a poor, destructive coping technique. Kokichi, while I don’t know how valid the rumors are, there have been stories of you coping with ‘tantrum’esque symptoms, screaming, crying, verbally lashing out, that sort of thing.”

Kaito furrowed his brow, “Kokichi hasn’t done that in a long time.”

“...I mean, not that long ago.” Shuichi muttered.

“Shuichi, you go out of your way to make pointed, hurtful remarks, even when under no personal pressure to do so. If your habits are ‘don’t talk’ or ‘only say snide, hurtful remarks’ you’re going to find yourself socially isolated someday, and rightfully so. All of these are destructive coping techniques.”

...did he have a food disorder?

Kokichi barely had time to ponder that, though, since he visibly deflated at the...not entirely made up rumors about him. Sighing, he shook his head a little. “Shuu-chan’s not wrong… But some of that stuff is what we talked about before, with me losing my head about stuff and just...unloading all of it on the people I trust. Others…”

His gaze went far away, not proud. “...it’s hard to think, when I get really scared… Shuu-chan took me to the med bay a few months back, and when it turned out I had to get my wisdom teeth taken out...I freaked out on him.”

“I won’t ask you to go into it.” Dr. Mariah said, sighing, “Not right now, I mean. It can be satisfying, to go over our mistakes, minute by minute, and I am so nosy…” she sipped her cup, “...but at this stage? When you’re only just starting to recognize your harmful habits? Dwelling on the memories of how you went wrong can be counter-productive. Once you understand that you’ve done something wrong, wasting energy lamenting over the details does exactly that: wastes energy. Some people quit their attempts at self-improval on the second step of the exercise because they can’t stop thinking about the first step, which is recognizing the problem.”

“Later, though? When you’re making real progress and have the emotional space and energy to really look at those memories? Basically when you’re at the point where you’re already improved as a person? I’m not a rehab specialist, or an anger management or abuse therapist… but when you’re emotionally ready, someday, I’d encourage you to really look at those memories. There might be people you need to apologize to.”

Kaito frowned. He and Miss Crystal hadn’t talked about ‘making amends’ yet, but she had also hinted, early on, that it would be something they’d talk about. He guessed that because she hadn’t brought it up again, he wasn’t quite ready for that yet.

“Alright. All that said. We’ve all been drinking our teas? We feeling a little more put together? Good… who did their homework?” Dr. Mariah asked, “Shuichi, this was a free week for you. Kaito, Kokichi?”

It was...incredibly easy to get lost in his head, running over and over the mistakes he’d made… And...not an insignificant amount of the time, it did sort of feel like...wasted energy. But there were a lot of things that he just...couldn’t stop thinking about that stressed him out. His therapist said that was a prime sign of anxiety. They were working on ways to help him let go of thoughts. 

...time and patience. 

Sighing and looking...a little worried, Kokichi opened up his journal to the page he’d been keeping his questions in:

Are we going to strictly feed Miyako formula?

-Shuuichi; wariness

When is Maki’s birthday?

-Kaito and Shuuichi; fear of depressing mood

*answered

Why would it be embarrassing for a spouse to publicly have a different opinion than you?

-Kaito; dread

“...I only noticed three questions, but...um. Here.”

Dr. Mariah took the paper, glancing over it. Like she had promised, she didn’t read the questions, but did read the second parts.

“Hmmm…” She sighed, giving Kokichi a mildly disappointed look. “I have to ask, though I’ll admit I didn’t specify this before, so I only have myself to blame… did you only note questions you didn’t ask specifically your partners? Or in general, to anyone you spoke to?”

Kokichi blinked before looking a little worried. “Oh, I...I thought you just asked for things I didn’t ask Kai-chan and Shuu-chan, so that’s what I did. Um...I don’t...really remember if I had things for other people… I don’t think so? I hung out with some friends last week, picked Shuu-chan up from school, and we had their planting ceremony but...other than that I didn’t really go out much…”

Another deeply disappointed sigh.

Giving the paper an openly disdainful look, she said, “I see, I see… I mean, you all are paying me to be here, I suppose there’s no real reason for me to be upset that you’re clearly just not listening when I speak to you. Or is it you just that you can’t take instruction? Either way, this is an extremely disappointing development, and not a good sign of our future lead-”

“That’s enough.” Shuichi said coldly, while Kaito’s eyes had gotten extremely intent, his shoulders tense, “You’re clearly playing some stupid game, but stop anyway.” 

Kokichi had frowned, but didn’t otherwise look too upset at Dr. Mariah...weirdly laying into him, at least until he noticed his partners prickle. Sighing, he reached over to pat Kaito’s hand and give Shuuichi a gentle look. “It’s a little mind-game-y, sure, but you two don’t need to fall for it anyway on my behalf. People are allowed to criticise me.”

Shuichi just huffed, looking displeased, while Kaito’s glassy, angry look eased up… before he frowned, concerned. Taking his pebble out of his pocket and sighing as he searched his other pocket for his polisher. 

Dr. Mariah smiled, before looking to the paper again, “Wariness, fear of depressing the mood-- a little more than one word, but alright--, and the one that made me want to test something, dread.” 

Giving Kokichi a curious look, she said, “Dread is a word that carries weight, Kokichi. Fear of depressing the mood is usually something to do with context. Maybe it just felt like the wrong time to ask? That’s fine. Wariness means that maybe the answer to the question didn’t matter to you as much as keeping the peace, no real investment. Used wisely, that can also be a perfectly acceptable reason to hold back on a question. Compromise is a healthy part of any social interaction. Dread though…”

She tapped the paper against her chin, before asking, “Why did you speak up just now? You seemed perfectly content to let me talk, for a moment there.”

Kokichi laughed sheepishly. “I thought just ‘fear’ was too vague…”

His smile went back into a more solemn expression, though, as she explained what a professional thought about his understanding. He hadn’t wanted to ask about Maki’s birthday, because it had felt like if he asked, then Shuuichi and Kaito would get sad and worried, missing her and...more often in Shuuichi’s case, telling himself that she wasn’t coming back. He’d been putting off asking how they were going to handle feeding Miya because...well, at the time the question had occurred to Kokichi, Shuuichi hadn’t even let Kaito touch his chest. It was different when it was just a functional thing, but...he didn’t want to make Shuuichi uncomfortable. 

The last question, though…

Kokichi sighed. “I mean...how you started saying all that stuff was so different from how you usually talk, so it was kind of a big tip off that you were looking for something. I was kinda curious what it was. But…” Kokichi’s lips thinned as he spared a glance towards his partners. “...but even if something’s a lie, or you’re playing a game, emotions are real. I didn’t want Shuu-chan and Kai-chan getting genuinely angry over an experiment, so I spoke up. But...I think that was a bit late…”

“Mmmm.” She sighed, “... I haven't read the questions, as promised. And I won’t make you read them, if you don’t want to. That said? Do you wish to go over the questions now? Your fears of… well, I have a few ideas, but nothing concrete enough to say ‘this’ is what you’re attempting to avoid… exploring the questions themselves could give us more context.”

Kokichi...visibly hesitated. There was a reason he hadn’t asked them initially. The last one...he still didn’t, and the first...he didn’t want to share more of Shuuichi’s body that his boyfriend was comfortable with. ...but it might be a conversation worth having...and it would maybe be easier with a therapist. The whole reason they had decided to go to therapy was to be able to talk to each other without getting into huge fights--if Kokichi’s response was just...to stop asking questions? That wasn’t very helpful. 

...but he was still scared…

“...the first and second, I’d be willing to talk about, but...I want Shuu-chan to read the first question first and decide if that’s something that...he’s comfortable talking about here.”

She smirked. No to ‘dread’ then, huh. She glanced at the paper, glanced at Kaito… “Certainly,” she said, standing up and heading over to Shuichi, carefully folding it so that the third question was hidden, before showing it to him, “Shuichi? Would you be comfortable discussing the first question? Again, I have not read them. If it’s something you can’t talk about with me around? Well, disappointing, but not unacceptable.”

Shuichi glanced at the page… before his eyes widened, frowning… before he seemed to sort of withdraw, looking distinctly uncomfortable.

“...” Shuchi seemed to think about it, before giving Dr. Mariah an almost viscous look, annoyed with her, “Sure. Fine.”

“You seem conflicted.”

“You’re expecting me to say no. I can see it on your face.”

Dr. Mariah laughed a little, the sound child-like, the first mannerism to match her young face. “If it takes personal spite to motivate you to improve? I can support that.”

“So… Shuichi, Kaito, Kokichi? Question one.” She sat down, “Are you feeding Miya strictly through formula?”

“Oh… oh!” Kaito said, giving Kokichi and Shuichi a startled look, “That’s a good question… that’s a good question. Kokichi, you didn’t have to be scared of asking that… right, Shuichi?”

Shuichi’s spiteful, angry look softened into something… guilty. “...Um, no… of course not…”

Kaito frowned. “...Guys, we can’t be scared to talk about Miyako’s needs. We super can’t. She needs us to get over ourselves, when it comes to stuff like that…”

Dr. Mariah raised an eyebrow, leaning back, observing.

Kokichi cringed at the uncomfortable look not just on Shuuichi’s face, but through his whole body. His whole essence just screaming that he didn’t want to talk about it, and was in a worse mood now from having it put on his mind. 

...but spite was a powerful motivator, especially for Shuuichi. 

Still, Kokichi gave his boyfriend an apologetic look. “I’m not...expecting anything. I just...this is something that we need to talk about, sooner than later especially now, and...we need to have a plan. That’s...all I wanted to talk about.”

Taking a breath, Kokichi tried to sit up more. “We’re still on the list for getting our first month of formula mix delivered, and we have the warmer and everything set up. She needs to be fed every couple hours when she’s super little, so...would it be a good idea to get in the habit of mixing up the next meal when we feed her, so it’s always quick to get her a bottle? Or mixing up a few for overnight, so we’re not doing it half asleep?”

Damn. Damn.

Kaito should have asked Thalia if there was any reason to not feed her the nectar. Damn. 

“I mean… we should probably have a mix of both, right? We can’t count on Shuichi to get up every single time she needs to eat, that’s not fair on him. Even if he decides to breastfeed, we should still bottle feed for when it’s our turn.” Kaito said, cracking his knuckles a little, “And, Shuichi, you’ve been pumping regularly for awhile now, so… instead of just tossing it now, we’d have both the pumps, and the formula… I mean, Seiko said the nectar was harmless, right? That there wasn’t any indication it’d hurt her? It’d seem a waste to not add it to the rotation, while we’ve got it.”

Kaito was spitballing, trying to think in terms of ‘what will give Miya the most and quickest access to food’... before he frowned, catching the expression on Shuichi’s face. “...bud?”

“I know it’s stupid, okay?” Shuichi suddenly hissed, staring furiously at Kaito, “I know. I should be fine with it-”

“Time out.” Dr. Mariah said.

Shuichi paused, the wind taken out of his sails, as he looked at her, “What?”

“Time out. Take a minute.” Dr. Mariah said, taking out a pocket watch and looking down at it, “Take five minutes. I’ll time you. When the five minutes are done, you can try again.”

“...I don’t need five minutes, I-”

“I do, then. Five minutes. Take those five minutes to think about what you want to say. And, not saying anything? Is just as unhelpful as saying it in the manner you just were.” Dr. Mariah smiled at the three gentleman, “Clocks ticking. Five minutes.”

The mix was...why Kokichi had prefaced with he wasn’t expecting anything of Shuuichi. Miya was...a bit of a special case, but he had asked Seiko and Dr. Tenchi if they could see a problem with Miya being on an all-formula diet, and neither could find a reason for one. Sure, breastmilk, and thus Shuuichi’s nectar, adapted to the specific needs of the infant breastfeeding, but...formula would still have all the things she needed. 

...so that was an option. But they hadn’t talked about this at all, and Kokichi had...no idea if Shuuichi was open to breastfeeding at all. 

And...while Kaito said everything Kokichi didn’t… Kokichi shrank into himself at the venom in Shuuichi’s voice, exactly what he had wanted to avoid…

But having a therapist did come in handy, it turned out. 

Kokichi sighed, trying to straighten himself out. Of course he didn’t want to purposefully provoke his partners...but he couldn’t be afraid of angering them at all. You couldn’t let that still your words when you talked with someone…

Giving Dr. Mariah a weak smile, Kokichi figured that...really trying to talk about anything of substance was off-limits during the break, but… “...may I have some more tea? It’s a lovely blend…”

“Of course. Kaito, Shuichi, can I refill your cups as well?”

“Uh, sure! Please!”

“Yes, thank you…”

Kaito watched the fish tank for a bit as Dr. Mariah refilled the cups. He still didn’t know why he hadn’t gotten himself a fish… he genuinely wanted one. They were so pretty, and there was something calming, in watching them just… swimming in their little, colorful homes. Living their simple, colorful little lives… Kaito sighed, thanking Dr. Mariah for his tea before sipping at it. It wasn’t quite his style, but it was a nice enough flavor regardless. 

Sitting back down, Dr. Mariah also took a sip of hers. “Mmmm…” Glancing at her pocket watch, she said nothing, putting it down again.

Another minute… another glance at the pocket watch…

“Okay. Shuichi, you may proceed.”

“Sorry.” Shuichi said quietly, “I’m embarrassed...I don’t know why this bothers me as much as it does… I keep thinking I’m over it, and then something new shows up and I just… I just get scared again…”

… Shuichi’s face tightened. Clutching his cup tighter. “...Do you think Miyako’s going to be ashamed of me? What if people tease her… I’m not a mother. I’m no one’s mother… what if I can’t do this?”

Kaito sighed, giving Shuichi an earnest look, “Hey, hey… lots of kids grow up with only dads. This isn’t any different from that. Whether or not you breastfeed or not, that’s got nothing to do with whether or not you can take care of Miyako… if anything, you have an advantage on us! Look at you, able to give her things I can only get from others! Like, ya know… her whole birth? That’s huge, Shuichi! She doesn’t need you to be a mother, she needs you to be her dad… who also happens to give birth to her.” Kaito laughed, though the laughter was a little hollow, Shuichi not looking all that soothed. A tired, guilty look on the ex-detectives face.

Kokichi sipped at his tea, feeling soothed by the light flavor, and when their break was up, he was...feeling a little braver. He nodded along with Kaito’s words, agreeing with each and every one wholeheartedly. 

“You don’t have to apologize for being scared or embarrassed. None of us are really sure about what we’re doing, and...well, it’s literally weighing on you the most out of us.” Kokichi’s words were gentle, quiet, but not out of meekness. “None of us know what’s going to happen… But we know that our daughter’s going to be here in less than two months, and that we’re going to love her. None of our circumstances can change that. And because we love her, and each other, we’re all going to do our best for whatever comes. And maybe I’m a little optimistic...but I think that’ll be enough.”

Kokichi paused, then gave Shuuichi a slightly more stern look. “...and there’s not a single thing to be ashamed of when I look at you, Shuu-chan. If anything? I bet Miya’s gonna run around bragging about how amazing her super smart detective dad is.”

Shuichi listened to Kokichi… before lowering his head. Lowering the brim of his hat. Not in rejection, just… overwhelmed. “I fucking hate crying…” Shuichi murmured quietly, as small tears dripped down his cheeks.

“I’ve always thought you were a very pretty crier, Shuichi.” Kaito grinned.

Shuichi laughed, shaking his head, “You’re so stupid, Kaito...why do you think that’s going to work, every time?”

“I’ll stop complimenting you guys when it stops leading to good things… maybe.” Kaito shrugged, “Actually, probably not. Sometimes I just gotta say it.”

“You all really don’t need to be afraid of talking to each other…” Dr. Mariah said, smiling softly, “It takes so little, for you all to get into a better headspace. Taking a moment to calm down without abandoning the conversation? Five minutes when anyone, not just Shuichi, has become emotionally overwhelmed? It helps. Being emotionally overwhelmed is a normal reaction to difficult conversations. It’s natural. But it’s our choice if we let that emotion dictate the conversation...and, no matter who calls for the break? Everyone needs to respect it. Even if you think you don’t need it. If someone calls for a break, assume they need it. And make use of it while you have it.”

Shuichi nodded quietly, “...yeah… I’m sorry guys… I get so… so insecure. Sometimes I feel like I’m just… faking this. Pretending to be a mother, pretending to be a… a person… I know, technically, neither of these are true. I don’t need to feel like a mother to be able to do this. And… and I… I am a person…”

“It’s understandable that you feel insecure in that idea. What people tell us our whole lives affects how we view ourselves. If all of society is telling you that you somehow don’t qualify as a person… even knowing better. Even having people tell you otherwise? That’s an uphill battle. You’re not weak or irrational for struggling with a genuine crisis of identity. Lots of people do. Lots of people get through it… and you will too.” Dr. Mariah said, leaning back with a sigh, sipping her tea, “I have complete faith in that. You seem more than capable. You’ll get through this… though never feel afraid to ask for help. It’s why we’re all here.”

They had already started doing something similar to that, but...instead of trying to re-phrase immediately? If any one of them could request a five minute time out, let them all decompress or center themselves...it would probably help a lot of difficult conversations. 

They could cover the logistics of feeding Miya later, try again with everyone knowing the sort of headspace they were in. Knowing how Shuuichi felt. 

...even if you know otherwise, still having a crisis of identity because of what society told you… Kokichi frowned a little at his lap. 

But when he looked back up, his expression was more peaceful. “...do you guys wanna talk more about feeding schedules later? We can do the math for everything and all…”

Kaito looked to Shuichi, ready to follow his desire on this… and after a moment, Shuichi nodded, “Yeah. We can talk about it later.” he said, raising up the brim of his hat and wiping off his cheeks. “We’ll figure it out.”

“Very good… now. Question number two…” Dr. Mariah looked down… raised an eyebrow… and laughed a little. “We’re never gonna get through a season without referencing her, huh… alright. Kaito, Shuichi… when is Maki's birthday?”

Kaito frowned, a confused look on his face. “... uh…” he turned to Kokichi, “I know you all said the reasons you weren’t comfortable asking the questions, but I’m still not sure why… this was a bad question to ask? This wasn’t the ‘dread’ question, was it?”

Kokichi...blushed a bit and shook his head. “No...it’s kinda dumb. I was out shopping with Amber and Stacy last week, right? And I was doing some birthday shopping because I know that Maki-chan and Shuu-chan’s birthdays are soon. And...I mentioned I didn’t actually know when they were. Amber pointed out that I could just find their files in the archive and find out, but...I’ve never liked to do it that way.”

“And…” Kokichi sighed, tugging at his hair a little. “...I don’t know… Sometimes you two just...get really sad when someone mentions Maki-chan. I was trying to wait for a better time to ask...but it was kinda too late when you did tell me.”

“Oh, I mean… I mean, sure we get sad talking about her… I mean yeah…” Kaito said softly, shoulders dropping, eyes going a little distant, “...yeah…”

“Truly… the most tragic of seperations… someone being on vacation.” Dr. Mariah observed dryly, raising an eyebrow.

“Don’t tease him. He and Maki… Maki and I… we didn’t separate on the best of terms. I think we both ended up having some serious argument with her before she left.” Shuchi sighed, adjusting his brim again. “And Maki’s idea of a vacation… she’s a thrill seeker, at her heart. And she thinks she’s indestructible…”

“We’re just hoping we see her again.” Kaito said softly, “It can be difficult to talk about her. But…” Kaito gripped his fists, looking to Kokichi, “But, look… I… I’m sorry I made you nervous to ask something. I don’t want you to be afraid to-”

“I’m not sure if this is something you need to apologize for, Kaito.” Dr. Mariah interrupted, resting her head against her fist, leaning on the armchair, “Kokichi’s choice was potentially the correct one. Sensitive topics sometimes need correct timing… and sometimes, you can’t stop someone from feeling sad about something. Being sad isn’t inherently destructive, towards others or yourself, so long as you cope well. Kokichi considered the pros and cons and decided the cons weren’t worth it.”

“In fact, there’s really only one way this exchange becomes destructive, by itself… Kokichi?” She asked, looking over to him sternly, “Do you resent them for the fact that you didn’t ask?”

...that was a smart way to put it, explaining their worry in a way people would understand without blowing her cover. Of course brilliant Shuu-chan would think up something like that. 

If Dr. Mariah hadn’t interrupted Kaito first, Kokichi would’ve done it himself, but he perked in surprise as she turned her intense gaze onto him. And he was...almost shocked by her question. “Do I resent...no! I totally get why Maki-chan can be a sore spot sometimes, and while I’m disappointed I didn’t find out her birthday until there was only, like, an hour left of it, that’s my own fault. I should’ve asked sooner, or looked at her file, if it meant that much to me. If I resent anyone in this situation, it’s myself, but...that doesn’t make anything better, so I’m just hoping I can make her birthday even better next year.”

“...though…” he glanced over to his partners, “I...may need some help carrying her present up to her room once it’s delivered…”

Dr. Mariah nodded, “Then, there you go. No one necessarily did anything wrong in this exchange, and I would argue, this wasn’t a case of poor communication. Communication isn’t just saying whatever's on your mind the second it enters your mind. Compromises are necessary. So long as you don’t end that compromise resenting the other party? Especially if they didn’t know they were a part of a compromise in the first place? Then, generally, it’s okay.”

Kaito was listening to this, of course, but.. He got super distracted as his eyes lit up, “You got her a gift? Awwww, babe… what’d you get her?!”

“Something heavy… furniture?” Shuchi guessed.

Kokichi nodded slightly. He knew out of his three questions this one was a bit silly in comparison...but he hadn’t asked it, so it went in. And while it wasn’t always the easiest to do in practice, he knew it wasn’t fair to grow resentment over something that someone else didn’t even know about. If you wanted something, you had to say it. 

And not all of their conversations about Maki these days were sad. 

Kokichi smiled a bit, looking pleased with himself. “Of course I got her a present. I have a feeling she’ll wanna change it, but I want to get her room nice and decorated and settled for when she comes back. I got her a free-hanging, full body punching bag. Like, the type you can practice with punches and kicks on. I know she likes having targets, but I thought this might be down her alley too.”

“Oh my god, Babe! That’s such a good idea! Oh dammit now I gotta get something to compete with that.” Kaito frowned, suddenly sporting a somewhat competitive gleam in his eyes, “Shoot… what beats a punching bag? And all the effort you’re putting into her room…”

Shuichi didn’t offer to get her a gift himself. The thought felt… sort of depressing. Fling her room with things that… might collect dust someday. But still, “That’s very sweet of you, Kokichi. I’m sure she’d like it.”

“Very nice, very nice…” Glancing down at the paper, “If we’re sure we’re not doing this final question, Kokichi? Perhaps we should move on to Kaito’s homework then.”

Kokichi grinned, happy that others thought it would be a good gift for Maki too, and he laughed softly when he recognized the competition in Kaito’s eyes. “Maybe you should get her, just, a huge pillow. So she has one to work out with, and one to sleep with.”

He sobered quickly, though, looking a little...sheepish as he nodded. “...I think that would be best. We all talked about Kai-chan’s homework a bit on our own, actually.”

Kaito’s eyes widened a little… before nodding, “That’s so funny you’d say that… but that’s actually a really good idea. Maki had a really nice pillow for years, but couldn’t bring it on the trip. I should replace it.”

Dr. Mariah raised her eyebrows, “Oh, really? Okay… let’s talk about how that went? Kaito, it was your homework. How do you feel the discussion went?”

“It went fine… that whole day was… interesting. Generally in a good way.” Kaito grinned, “Some really good ways…”

Shuichi just sighed slightly. 

“Mostly, I guess it was just informative. Shuichi helped me with questions, brought up some ideas that never would have occurred to me… did you know spouses don’t need to co-sign to get loans or buy lands?”

Dr. Mariah, to her credit, only slightly raised an eyebrow at this. “Oh? Do tell.”

“Yeah, it’s wild! I’d have never even thought about it. And… we spent…” Kaito hesitated, before crossing his arms, squaring his jaw, “We spent some time trashing our parents.”

“Oh?” Interesting… she could taste nervousness coming from him, but he seemed outwardly proud.

“Yeah. Seriously… they so… it was like they went out of their way to make this harder on all of us! Every time I think about it, I just get more pissed and baffled by it all. I…” Kaito paused, something uncertain in his eyes, “...I wish I could ask them what they were thinking…”

“I won’t pretend to not know anything about your family situation, Kaito.” Dr. Mariah said, “And… I do want to give you my condolences. It had to be especially challenging, to hear it here, of all places. Where I’m certain sympathy was given a little more sparingly than it would have been, had you been any other family in Dicea.”

“Oh, you know… it’s fine…” Kaito said, gaze getting more distant, back to cracking his knuckles, “...they’re fine, ya know? Like, in the long run… everything’s fine. I’ll just ask them later, I guess...”

“...I’m sure their trials are going fine.” Shuichi muttered, if only for Kaito’s sake.

Kokichi frowned slightly, his shoulders tightening as he took another sip of tea. ...it bothered him more than he could articulate that Kaito wasn’t a full citizen of the place he’d been born in. That Shuuichi wouldn’t be if they got married. That half of all married people in Luminary weren’t. That freedom was something reserved only for the already powerful and wealthy. 

...but there was nothing he could do about it. Luminary wasn’t his problem. And like Kaito had planned to do for a future spouse when he was young, the best thing Kokichi could do was support everything his husband wanted when it came to Luminary.

In some ways it felt like their parents had sabotaged them, but...Kokichi would honestly more readily place his bet on Aiichi genuinely not knowing. Or just not thinking about it as something to mention. Wouldn’t be the first time. For Leon and Sayaka...he really had no idea.

But for however horrible they were in life… Kokichi sighed and leaned over to hold Kaito’s arm supportively for a moment, offering him a gentle smile. “It sucks waiting...but in the meantime, we’re figuring things out.”

Kaito nodded, that lost look in his face for a moment… before he grinned at Kokichi, “Yeah! Absolutely. We’re working it out!”

Dr. Mariah watched this exchange… but, honestly, this was something for Crystal to work out. Dr. Mariah was so curious about all of that, and the sheer depression that radiated off of Kaito when talking about his family was, frankly, delicious… sigh. Miss Crystal just didn’t appreciate what she had. More demons should be therapists, honestly. Kaito would have fed one of her kind for years. 

And, unfortunately, years is probably what it would really take. There was no emotional shortcut, to deal with a tragedy like that. That sort of trauma, the sheer, almost absurd, consistency in how bad it was, losing your parents to another beloved family member, unable to go to their funeral, while people held parties celebrating it nearby… yeah. Miss Crystal would be unpacking that for years.

Nothing she could do about that one. Moving on.

“Shuichi? How did you feel about the conversation? This hierarchy discussion affects you as much as it does Kaito.”

“Like Kaito said, I offered my own questions during that conversation. I was curious about some of the legal stuff. It’s… it’s sometimes difficult to fathom, honestly. But, as for how I felt about the conversation itself? It didn’t feel hard. It was just us asking questions and Kokichi answering them.”

“Okay, okay… Kokichi? Any thoughts?”

“...I’m always happy to answer questions about culture or laws if I can,” Kokichi started softly. “It’s been...difficult, in the past, parsing what’s universal and what’s just the norm for our countries, and all this helps us avoid misunderstandings. That makes me happy.”

He took a small breath, reminding himself that it was crucial to be honest. “...but...I mean, it’s no secret that there are politics in Luminary I don’t agree with. And...sometimes that makes these kinds of conversations hard… I never want to create a situation where you guys don’t want to ask about things, or tell me about stuff, so…”

Kokichi sighed, a sort of self-deprecating look on his face. “Turns out when your job is evaluating laws, you turn into a bit of a control freak. I’m...working on trying to just...let things go.”

“I have always wondered about that. Someone being raised from infancy into a position… all three of you, I believe, had that happen to you. Raising a child into a career has… historically, interesting implications. There’s a lot of questions of ethics in the practice…”

Dr. Mariah hummed slightly to herself, before laughing slightly, “I apologize. I’m philosophizing. Though, suggesting the careers you three were raised into doesn’t affect how you communicate with other people is unlikely. Perhaps that’s something for the four of us to explore a little, if only, at worst, to give me better context on your lives… yes? Kaito?”

“Oh, uh… I wasn’t raised into a career.” Kaito said, putting his hand down, “Remember? I think we talked about this. I gave up my claim at twelve. I wasn’t put on a different career track after that.”

“Oh… hm… well, it still might be a conversation worth having, even if it doesn’t directly affect all of you. Kokichi… controlling tendencies? Could you elaborate on your thought process there. As far as your upbringing goes, I can fully understand why you would say that. It almost seems inevitable, being raised as the future leader would give you controlling tendency’s. But I haven't seen or heard too many examples of it yet. What makes you say so?”

While it was common practice to raise the heir as...well, the heir...Kokichi had questioned that too. Maybe, when it was time to pick his heir, he’d have some thoughts about setting a precedent on paper…

Giving Dr. Mariah a nod, Kokichi tilted his head a little as he tried to explain. “It’s...hard not to think of...like, everything in the world as my problem. If I hear about it, then I have to do something about it, because silence or inaction is approval. I...really started to notice that when my family started talking about...stuff in Luminary to me. While at times they just wanted to vent or explain, or even hear my thoughts, it was my immediate assumption that they wanted me to do something about it. Because...why complain about something if you have no plans to change it?”

Sighing, Kokichi looked exasperated at himself. “But I know that’s not the case, and continuing to act that way only hurts me and the people around me… But it’s still hard to let go of that impulse of wanting to fix things…”

After a moment, Kokichi looked over at his husband with a slightly sad smile. “...you told me once that it wasn’t my job to keep you happy here...and my immediate thought was, no, it actually is. So...that’s where I’m working from.”

Dr. Mariah sighed. Ahhhh, yes...personal responsibility to the point of martyrdom. It wasn’t enough to do what you could for who you could. If you weren’t trying to solve every problem you heard about? Then you might as well be the villain yourself. 

Healthy.

But, not necessarily the point Dr. Mariah wanted to argue, if only because it wouldn’t help their relationship issues, and, again… Kokichi was a ‘special’ situation. Where not only was that mindset instilled in him, but reinforced by almost everything in his life. This wasn’t just some poor, anxious kid convinced every fire they’ve ever heard of anywhere was somehow personally their fault. This was… well. A country leader. Sure, just the heir, but tell that to everyone sending him requests to solve their drought issues, their thefts, their… heh. Their fires. 

Kokichi felt like everything was his responsibility, because so far, everything was. At twenty.

Healthy.

Though, for Kokichi’s own sake, thankfully he seemed to be starting to recognize the destruction in that sort of thinking himself already. Dr. Mariah hoped his personal therapist was working with him on it. God knows everyone else in his life was going to keep reinforcing it.

“Aww, babe…” Kaito gave him a soft look… before sighing. “I can’t blame you for that. I don’t know if I’d feel different, in your shoes… but, babe… sometimes just hearing us out is enough, ya know? You…” Kaito frowned, looking uncomfortable. Like maybe he didn’t want to say this. “...you can’t actually… make me happy. Just… I know that’s not how you mean it. I know you’re not trying to control me… but sometimes you talk like you think you can? Like you can just make me think or do things, and… I mean, I don’t know… I don’t know what I’m trying to say…” Kaito admitted, shoulders sagging.

Because he had never felt like Kokichi could do that before. Because of course he couldn’t….

But now things felt different. 

And he wasn’t as certain about those memories anymore. Of course Kokichi couldn’t. Obviously. But…

(...had… had he…? Been able to before?)

For a moment, Kokichi looked agonized. His heart aching for what had been done to his husband, and his guilt welling for the times that...he’d taken advantage of it. ...one day, he hoped they would be able to openly talk about it. Primarily so Kaito could come to terms with what had been done to him, but...also so Kokichi could properly apologize. 

“...I know,” he sighed, just looking...generally bummed out, rather than heartbroken now. “For a long time it just...felt like if I managed to do everything right, then you would be happy. But no one is happy all the time, and I can’t force you to feel things. I wouldn’t want to, anyway. It just...felt like, because you were having a hard time with things anyone would have a hard time with, I was failing you.”

Kokichi sat back against the couch a little, his eyes incredibly tired. “...I just have to get it through my head that, for most things, it’s enough. I’m enough. And I’m not failing because I’m not making miracles everywhere.”

“Just get on my level, Kokichi.” Shuichi said dryly, it almost sounding like a joke as he said, “Just accept you have no power, anytime, ever.”

Well, that was wrong in the opposite direction. Huh. “You’re working with Miss Crystal, correct, Shuichi?”

“I mean… a little, yeah…”

“How often?”

“Every other week, though I missed this week because it’s harder to get out-”

“Shuichi, I can’t make you. So, I’ll just say it like this. Kaito? Kokichi? He needs more therapy sessions, more consistently. Once a week at a minimum. Miss Crystal is known for being flexible on where to meet, you should discuss her coming to the castle. As your relationship counselor? I strongly recommend you three discuss that. Either with me or on your own.”

Shuichi’s expression had grown cold at all of that. Giving him a worried look, Kaito said, “We’ll discuss that at home. Right, Shuichi?”

Shuichi just tsked. “She just likes to pick on me…”

“I do. But I don’t give bad advise. And that advise is earnest.” Dr. Mariah sighed, glancing at the time. “...we should talk homework. Let’s see…  Shuichi is fighting an extremely pessimistic lifeview of his own abilities to influence things… Kokichi is struggling with intense feelings of personal responsibility… both of these things are potentially destructive to each other… and Kaito… ugh, I hate when all my group clients don’t share a theme. I’m going to cheat. Kokichi, Shuichi? Any responsibility based life views Kaito’s struggling with?”

“Is that how this works now?” Shuichi asked, humored despite himself. “What about mindreading?”

“Anything you say to a question like that would be illuminating for its own reasons.” Dr. Mariah said simply, “And I’m not above bending to my own communication flaws.”

Kokichi cringed slightly, able to perfectly imagine the look on Shuuichi’s face even before he looked over. ...honestly...Shuuichi probably would benefit from more regular therapy sessions. Pretty much everyone did. And especially if he was dealing with insecurity, feeling like he was...faking everything? That was something that deserved a thorough talk...and more than an hour or two every two weeks. 

...if nothing else, it might give Shuuichi something interesting to do when he wasn’t feeling up to going out. 

Kokichi gave Dr. Mariah a half amused look but he put her question to real thought. Responsibility-based life views… “...I mean...you talked before about talking with Miss Crystal about...like, relying on people outside the three of us and Maki-chan. That was a while ago now, so I dunno how useful that would be for any homework…”

There were...other things. But things Kokichi was hesitant to even talk about with Kaito, let alone with Dr. Mariah too. Even if his conditioning was breaking down, Kokichi couldn’t imagine Kaito would take too well to learning that he and Maki knew what was in the letter Byakuya sent about their parents. 

Kaito scratched his chin, “Well, I mean… I have talked to Miss Crystal about that a bit… I mean,  I don’t feel like I’m doing that badly on it lately.”

“We’ll make it part of your homework either way. Not everything’s going to lead to a revelation, but there’s no harm in diving into familiar territory. There might be something useful hidden in the irrelevant.” Dr. Mariah closed her eyes. Homework… homework…

“Alright. This might not be relevant, in the next week, and honestly, it might not even be that revolutionary. You three likely already do something like this… but, if it’s possible to do so, this next week, when you’re confronted with a problem? Any problem? See if you can’t get advice from the other two, and see if there’s anything in their solutions that can be used to satisfyingly solve the problem. Maybe their advise won’t be applicable, but I want you all to at least try to incorporate your partners advice. With the exception of maybe Kaito, two of you have some extreme ways of thinking, and neither of these ways are inherently bad. But moderation in all things tends to be useful, no matter what you’re talking about, so hopefully mixing your thinking might help with that, and also knowing how your partners problem solve and trying to think from their point of view will make it easier to ask advice, and heed it, in the future… ideally.”

Waving her hand idly, she said, “Again, a week isn’t a lot of time, and perhaps nothing will come up at all for any of you. No problems to solve. That’s fine, a boring week is better than an educational, stressful week. Just do your best to keep it in mind if something does come up. And, next week, we’ll discuss how it went. What do you think? Is that feasible?”

“I mean, I feel like I go to Shuichi and Kokichi for advice pretty regularly already, but sure.  I can try to be more conscious about it this week, if that’s what you’re going for?” Kaito asked.

Dr. Mariah, “Yes, exactly. Shuichi, Kokichi?”

Huh… Kokichi thought that he went to his partners relatively often, if not for help thinking through a problem, then at least to see what they thought about it...but at least right in the moment, he couldn’t think of any examples. Just something to be more conscious about, he supposed. Not just in the next week, but kind of...forever? He valued their input. 

Kokichi nodded a bit, smiling softly. “I can do that, for sure. And, personally, I think the...writing down questions and how I feel about it is helpful for me to recognize my own habits, so I’m gonna keep that up. It might be relevant in future sessions, maybe not, but I’m going to try and remember to bring it with me when we meet.”

After all, just journaling in general had helped him in his personal sessions. It was hard to remember everything he did in a week, or even in a few days sometimes, and even more to remember everything he was thinking and feeling about all that stuff. Having a written account, even if he started to feel differently later, really helped him keep everything organized…

(Especially because… At first, he had been genuinely worried when Dr. Mariah had started her little test. Not because her words hurt, but...he wasn’t sure if he was starting to forget stuff. With his thoughts not making much sense lately...he had been worried he’d remembered the homework wrong.)

“Certainly. I try not to make the homework too repetitive, but if you find one of the assignments helps more than the others, you can absolutely feel free to keep incorporating it into the sessions, or do it on your own time… though, I will always encourage you to bring things up during the sessions, if you’re looking for analysis and accountability. Because I am-”

“Nosy?” Shuichi interrupted dryly.

Dr. Mariah smiled, “Exactly. Shuichi, how about you? Any concerns about the homework?”

Shuichi considered it, before shaking his head, “No, I’m alright, I can do it. Though, again, I may not make it in next session. This is getting harder… I’m really heavy and my feet hurt.” he grumbled, just being honest.

Dr. Mariah, again, gave that small, childish laugh, before nodding, “Absolutely. Again, I will always assume I’ll see you next session, but that shouldn’t dissuade you from taking the time if you need it. Now, with homework sorted, we have a little bit of time left.” Dr. Mariah said, glancing at her watch, “Is there anything anyone’s been hoping to bring up within the sessions that we haven't gotten to yet? We might not have time to fully dive into it, but it can give us a starting point for the next session, if anyone has anything on their mind?”

Kokichi smiled slightly as Shuuichi interrupted the therapist, hoping that was something of a sign that they were getting a little more comfortable. He knew Shuuichi still didn’t appreciate Dr. Mariah’s methods--and today was no different from that--but he hoped that Shuuichi wouldn’t be fighting it so much as time went on. 

Looking to the clock as well, Kokichi perked as...there was something that likely wouldn’t warrant much conversation, but was worth mentioning. “It’s looking like Temp’s gonna get the go ahead for adopting Bonus. I’ve already painted a crib, but Temp said he’d be happy to take it, so it’s gonna be Bonus’ anyway.”

“Oh. Congratulations, that’s quite a bit of good news. Kaito, you moved past your initial misgivings?”

Kaito nodded, a surprisingly sober look on his face as he said, “Yeah. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’m standing behind my initial concern. I don’t want anything to happen to this kid, and I was concerned that Temp seemed to want him, specifically. I was worried maybe it had something to do with his parents, or maybe the rest of the death cult… but, after a few interviews, his references came back clean and glowing, the social worker said his house was, quote, ‘quirky, but more than accommodating for a child’, and…”

Kaito grinned, now looking a little sheepish as he said, “Honestly, he seemed so earnest and nervous every interview that, well… I don’t know. I got a better vibe from him. He just seems like a young guy who’s kind of impatient to be a dad. And, like, while his job is… kiiiinda creepy? Him owning burial land and supervising funeral homes doesn’t make him a death cultist.” Kaito laughed, rolling his eyes, “When we talked about his work, it was the only thing he didn’t seem a little nervous to talk about. Guys a professional. I think… yeah, I think Bonus will be well looked after, by him.”

“Is there any conflict of interest, as three people so invested in the child, to live so close and be friends with his adoptive father?” Dr. Mariah asked. “Are you worried about that?”

“No… I don’t think I’m worried about that. It’s not like I want to raise Bonus in place of Temp. So long as the guys not, like, abusing him, it’s not like I’m gonna interfere in their lives. And I think that’s the thought for any kid, right? Whether you know them or not?” Kaito mused, though it was clear he had put some thought into this himself, before grinning, “At this rate, our kids will likely go to school together. Maybe Miyako and Bonus will be friends. That’d be… I think that’d be something good. A good thing to come out of a bunch of bad stuff.”

“The way you swooped in and stole lunch with Thalia from him, I imagine he might be feeling a little rivalry to you. That could be funny to watch.” Shuich mused.

“Look, man, he’s gotta be quicker on the jump than that. People aren’t that intimidating, most people are flattered if you ask them to coffee, at the very worst.” Kaito said blankly.

Kokichi chuckled softly. “I’ll be honest, I’m kinda hoping Miya and Bonus will be friends. But less of a ‘I wanna get my grubby hands all over Bonus’ life’ and more of a ‘it’d be cool if they wanted to have playdates together and Temp and I could hang out too while we watch the kids. I think it’s the kind of feeling I’d have for any friend who’s having or adopting a kid that’d be Miya’s age, though...I’d be really surprised if Amber or Stacy or Hajime-chan came out of the blue now and announced they were having a kid.”

Giving Kaito a fond look, Kokichi hummed. “Was that what he was getting to… I was wondering. Well, if he keeps up his running path in the gardens, he’ll likely get another chance to talk with her soon.”

Smiling a little more, Kokichi...wasn’t sure if this was a little much to be telling their therapist, but...fuck it, he was proud. “You and Thalia hit it off pretty well, right? You said coffee went well.”

“Yeah! She’s a little subdued, but she’s a sweetheart under all that. Gives me strong Maki vibes, honestly. I think I’m gonna try to introduce her to Waku. Maybe. I gotta ask Waku first, she’s not always up to social stuff.” Kaito shrugged. 

He had written a letter to Princess Sonia.

He had debated with himself for awhile, who to tell. He couldn’t not tell anyone, that felt… wrong. But at the same time, for his family, at least, the information about Danganronpa, while horrifying, wasn’t… urgent. It wasn’t affecting them. Not anymore, anyway. And Kaito didn’t want to bring those problems onto his family. 

So. He decided not to tell Kokichi or Shuichi. It’d just place unnecessary burdens on them, especially Kokichi, who unlike Kaito, probably took a huge amount of comfort in the idea that Luminary was his only problematic neighbor. And he didn’t want to hurt his husband like that. Not unless he had too.

He thought briefly of confronting Tsumugi for more information, but… the woman had been in Dicea for almost two decades, and was raising her, adopted, daughter here. A daughter his own son was devoted too. Even as a Danganronpa ambassador, he doubted the woman had any power or influence over what happened in her home country, and he wasn’t about to complicate her or Kimiko’s lives here by accusing her of anything.

He considered sending word to Byakuya… but even though he was doing better about it lately, there was still a part of Kaito that really, really believed Kings already knew everything. Always. All the time. That he’d just be telling Byakuya something he already knew. But that Byakuya might… react. Badly. If Kaito revealed he knew. He had no idea what that reaction would be, or why, but… it felt like a bad thing to try.

For almost the exact same reasons, King Aiichi was also taken out of the running. King Aiichi had to already know, right? And jostling that nest of bees might, well… frankly, it might hurt Kokichi. King Aiichi accidently hurt his son all the time. Kaito wasn’t about to tempt it.

All of that had left him with… Sonia.

And, honestly! She might be perfect! Sonia’s family didn’t really do much, legislation or politics wise, but they were infamous among the elite communities in most countries for just knowing shit. Finding information and being able to utilize it in some clever, effective way. Sonia might already know, honestly, but Kaito had thought if there was any royal out there who could handle the information effectively if she didn’t already, it was her.

More than that, Sonia was kind. She was a sweet heart who genuinely cared about the wellbeing of people… if a little creepy in her purely hypothetical fascination with deadly warefare and torture methods. She swore it was purely a fantastical fascination for her, and he believed her. Still… kind of creepy. But! In every other respect? She was a good person, and he believed she could be trusted to do something good with this.

So… he had placed his faith in this problem with her. And as far as he was concerned, as of right now, that was all he planned to do with it. So long as Danganronpa’s bullshit didn’t spread to his family? To his? His part in this was done. He had kids to raise.

Kaito grinned, “Yeah, I liked Thalia a lot.”

Kaito had said the same thing about Waku, that she had Maki-vibes, so...that was a good sign. Kaito looked at the two women and thought that they looked like friends. 

Again, Kaito had been settling in to life, was in a good place that was getting better, and he was far from isolated...but Kokichi was still elated to see him making friends. Getting a social life cast nice and wide, even if he ended up with just a few friends. A few good friends was still perfect in Kokichi’s mind. 

...his husband’s life would never be how it was in Luminary, he knew. But...even if it wasn’t his job to make Kaito happy...he still hoped his husband could have a happy life here. 

“That’s awesome,” Kokichi simply said, giving Kaito a soft, happy look. 

“It’s good. A healthy social life tends to result in a healthy personal life.” Dr. Mariah said, more to encourage than trying to instill any real wisdom. 

Shuichi sighed. “Are we close to the time up?”

“Eager to go, Shuichi?” She asked, raising an amused eyebrow.

“I think I still feel the effect of the tea, and I kind of want to get going before I feel tired and unwilling to do anything again… thank you again for the tea.”

“Of course. If you like, you can take a bag home with you. You can get Othain Oolong Tea at the import market, but having a little means you won’t have to wait for someone to make the trip.” Dr. Mairah said, standing up and, brushing off her dress, heading to the door. “I’ll go fetch it.”

“Oh, thank you! But you don’t have to, Dr. Mariah, I can make the trip for Shuichi-annnnd she’s gone.” Kaito chuckled as the door closed behind her, looking to Shuichi as he asked, “Do you want more of that tea?”

“I’m not against the idea. It was nice, and I did feel more alert afterwards. Less worn down.” Shuich sighed.

Kokichi gave Shuuichi a fond look, excited that they’d maybe? Found an alternative to coffee that would give Shuuichi a boost? He mouthed the type of tea to himself after Dr. Mariah said it, imprinting it on his memory, and figured he might try and stop by Dr. Tenchi’s office sometime to see if she had a minute, see if there were any restrictions they should be aware of with the tea, or if Shuuichi could have as much as he wanted. 

“It might be nice to have a non-caffeinated but energizing tea around generally,” Kokichi mused, getting up to place his empty cup on the tray that Dr. Mariah had brought them all out on. “I mean, I usually go for black teas when I need some pep, but getting an alternative coul--nnngm.”

It wasn’t bad. Kokichi didn’t even drop his teacup. But when he stood up from the couch, black dots scattered over his vision, and it was obvious by the way his eyes fluttered and he staggered a step though remained upright.

For a moment, Kokichi just breathed, trying to balance himself, but for his partners’ sakes, he muttered out a soft, “Oh...stood up too fast…”

Shuichi just looked a little concerned, but Kaito was up immediately, putting a steadying arm around Kokichi’s waist and a hand grasping the teacup in his hand, taking it away from him as he said softly, “Let me take care of that, babe. Sit back down…”

Shuichi’s eyes darted around Kokichi's face, seeing pale spots on his cheeks, and said, “Kokichi? Are you alright?”

Reluctantly, Kokichi relinquished his cup to Kaito and sat back down, feeling like...he needed it. Just for a sec before they headed home. He offered Shuuichi a small smile as he breathed, wiggling his fingers and toes to...try and get his blood circulating a little better. “Yeah, I’m okay. Just got dizzy for a second… Teaches me not to hyper-extend my knees immediately upon standing up, right?”

Kokichi laughed softly, and while it didn’t sound hollow… This wasn’t...the first time that had happened lately. It was just a phenomena that happened sometimes, but… Seiko had looked worried. Had suggested he try and take it easy for a bit, make sure he was eating well, getting enough restful sleep… Luckily his sleep hadn’t been fitful lately, so he didn’t need her offer of sleep medication. 

...work wasn’t that strenuous and...he skipped out on training more days than not these days, simply sleeping through it by accident than a real rejection. Walking to therapy was alright and he didn’t really have anything planned for the next week. Really...skipping his sessions with Cedar would be the most he could take it easy, but… He’d just ask that they not do yoga this week. He’d be okay.

Kaito and Shuichi briefly shared a look, before Kaito leaned in and placed a few kisses against Kokichi’s temple and cheek, saying, “If you need any help today, babe, you can ask me. What’s the point of these muscles if I can’t help both you and Shuichi home? Make use of me.”

Taking Kokichi’s cup, he haded over to Shuichi, grabbing his as well, and by the time he brought it over to the plate, Dr. Mariah came in, holding a small bag laced with white ribbon, saying, “This should be good for about three kettles. Like I said, you can get it at the…” she tasted the air, “What did I miss? Did something happen?”

Kokichi grinned up at his husband, determined to stay cheerful even when the fatigue in his eyes grew day by day. “Well, you know I can’t resist an opportunity to hold your hand. I think that counts for...maybe my fourth favorite muscle of yours?”

Looking over as Dr. Mariah returned, Kokichi had been about to thank her for the tea again, though he looked briefly surprised. (Was she…?) ...he supposed a therapist would be the best at sensing even subtle tension. 

Raising his hand, Kokichi grinned over at her, trying to maintain levity. “It’s alright, I just stood up a little too fast and got dizzy. Can be a little startling, you know? Thank you for sharing your tea with us!”

Dr. Mariah considered him… before nodding. “Of course. All of you get home alright, I’m looking forward to seeing you again next week… don’t forget your homework.”

-

Takashi was...maybe taking his sweet old time looking over the noticeboard, making sure all the flyers and announcements were lined up, nothing blocking anything else, making sure there weren’t out of date notices or ones that were full… He was off after this, and technically already was, just wanting to check by the board before he went home, but…

...he had a reason to linger in the castle, and it could literally walk through the door at any moment. 

There wasn’t going to be some huge announcement or anything, even if it was going to end up spread around the rumor mill at some point soon. But right now, as far as Takashi could tell, only administration knew, and they were working on a message to send to their farmers, letting them know that there was a state of emergency in Luminary and that there would be more demand for food, both in the individual market, and in Dicea buying more bulk crops to trade to Luminary without the inflated price. 

A good response! But the situation was still...scary. 

Takashi wasn’t a religious man, but...every bit of food in the Luminary capital spoiling and rotting all at once? It...it couldn’t be sabotage from the revolutionaries, right? Even if you set aside moral questions, rot and mold couldn’t spread that quickly. Someone would’ve noticed that there was some spoil ages ago. And...everywhere in the capital? Not even a plague of nightmares could do something like that, right?

King Byakuya would likely have his hands full, but he had his hands full with a civil war these past few months too, and he still found time to call Kaito regularly. Takashi never knew what they talked about, other than the look on Kaito’s face when he came back out of the phone room, but...he didn’t like it. There wasn’t much he could do, his letters to Byakuya almost moot at this point when the brothers were talking directly, but...he could give Kaito a heads up before he heard it from the beast.

Takashi glanced over his shoulder again, waiting for the royal family to return. 

Shuichi was hanging off his arm, his head on Kaito’s shoulder, and while Kokichi hadn’t really needed it, Kaito had eventually scooped him up when they were halfway home, holding him against his hip, his husband’s arms around his neck as the two chatted idly, Kaito laughing quietly at something his husband whispered into his shoulder. 

Kaito just liked having them both close, if he was honest, but both of his men were… notably worn down, after therapy. And Kaito wasn’t! So, he’d use that to his, and their, advantage! 

He gave the guards a small, somewhat sheepish nod, though Kokichi was quick to sit up, greeting them warmly. Shuichi didn’t so much as open his eyes, looking like he was doing his best to nap while he walked.

Takashi perked, spotting Kaito, but… He smiled a bit, seeing the easy, domestic comfort in the throuple, and he lightly jogged up to them, returning Kokichi’s wave. “Hey, you three! I can see you’re a bit busy, but, Kaito, could I talk to you some time today?”

“I’ll just be hanging around the hall if that works, unless you want a hand?” the man laughed. “I do have a spare.”

Kokichi snorted, rolling his eyes a bit. “‘Kashi, please.”

Shuichi muttered something almost indistinguishable about needing to attach some sort of wagon or carriage to Kaito, just let him pull him up the stairs, it’d be fine. Kaito chuckled, but gave Takashi a mildly startled look at the request. “Oh, uh… did Byakuya schedule another call?”

He wanted to be upfront with the young man, but...this was the kind of news that required just a little more tact. Maybe having Kaito sitting down, and not carrying and supporting his two partners that looked wiped, though Kokichi seemed to be in better shape. Not too much of a competition though, he supposed--if he were as pregnant as Shuuichi was, he wouldn’t want to be on his feet either.

Shaking his head, Takashi tried not to be too cryptic. “No, he hasn’t called today, though someone from the Luminary administration had a business call with Dicean administration today. I was just hoping to catch you for a sec, but it looks like you three have had a day. Please, settle in first, I’ll be down here.”

“Oh, okay, thanks! Um, yeah, let me get these two settled, and I’ll be back down.” Kaito said, looking confused as Shuichi muttered something again, listening to him, before chuckling, “Handsome, I love you, but even I’m not that strong. It’ll be fine, we’re just gonna get up the stairs and then you can chill out for the rest of the day. Come on, let’s go…”

Shuichi grumbled again, sounding thoroughly disgruntled, but allowed himself to be led to the staircase, finally opening his eyes and sighing, the three slowly heading up.

Eventually, after some more small whining from Shuichi, they did manage to get to their room, and after spending some time stealing kisses from both of them, mildly worried that both, but definitely Shuichi, would be napping and unavailable for kisses when Kaito got back. With kisses got, Kaito sighed, before heading downstairs to the hall, not wanting Takashi to be waiting around too long, if the guy was just waiting on him. Getting down the stairs, Kaito warily looked around. Where had he gone… maybe Kaito had missed him. 

Okay, so Kaito wasn’t going to question too much...good. Despite seeing each other in passing pretty often, Takashi and Kaito rarely spoke, and requesting to talk out of the blue when Takashi knew that Shuuichi knew Byakuya had talked to him, and so Kaito likely knew too, was...suspicious. But he hoped the prince would hear him out. He just wanted to give the guy some time to prepare. 

Takashi had been leaning against a wall, using a special cloth to oil up the joints in his metal arm while he waited, but he spotted Kaito soon enough and waved the prince down again. “Thanks for hearing me out. Could we sit somewhere? I promise I’ll try not to keep you long.”

Oh. A sit down conversation?

Oh… okay…

Still, Kaito tried not to feel uneasy. This person didn’t have nearly as much power over him as he used to, so even if the man proved to have been hiding a sinister nature all this time, he had waaaay missed his moment of opportunity to exploit Kaito. And, honestly, Kaito doubted he was the type. If only because, well… he hadn’t yet. And, well… he had caught Shuichi falling out a window. And with a panic attack. And, well… again, he hadn’t done anything yet.

...ngh.

But, Kaito just grinned, “Yeah, sure man. Uh…” looking around, he said, “Is this a… are we hanging out? Or… sorry, we could sit at the dining hall? Or maybe, uh, one of the garden benches? I love sitting on the garden bench. I do it… a lot.”

“...let’s head to the west garden. It’s a great day out, isn’t it?” While it wasn’t quite dinner time, even for the early birds, if Kaito needed a moment to collect himself it would be better without a need to immediately leave. Plus...it felt like bad taste, considering the huge meals the kitchen always made, Dicean bounty plentiful. There shouldn’t be too many people lingering around the gardens, and it was quicker to get to the benches in the west garden than the east. 

And it didn’t take long at all to get there, no one about. Takashi sat himself down, and after Kaito did the same, he took a breath. “I’m sorry to be weird about this. Earlier this afternoon, the admins got a call from Luminary, like I said…”

Takashi’s eyebrows drew in, his usual light nature brought down and visibly unsettled. “...there’s a state of emergency in the capital right now. All of the food reserves are...inedible. Either rotted or infected with black mold. And...it’s all of the food in the entire city, from what we’ve been told.”

“I’m sorry. I thought that you should know before it gets to the rumor mills.”

For a very strange second, Kaito felt so relieved.

With the way Takashi had been gearing up, Kaito had thought that (Byakuya, Kaede, Maki) someone had died. Someone had died. Someone else had died. Again? Again?? We’re doing this again???

And Kaito had waited for Takashi to continue, waiting for the news, waiting to find out who this time… and his back eased in relief when he was done. They were all alive. Everyone was still alive. It was okay. They’re alive…

...and then what Takashi actually said hit him. 

… Kaito chuckled. Giving Takashi an incredulous look. “...What?”

Takashi gave the prince an exasperated look, though it wasn’t because of Kaito. “I know. It sounds insane. Surely they just meant that, maybe, the castle reserves were out, or...that they had found mold, and had to throw some out. Because surely someone would’ve found the beginnings of it, right?”

“But no,” the older man sighed, looking out into the garden, disturbed by what he had heard. “We got the emergency notice, and the admins have been checking through other means and…”

He shook his head, giving Kaito a serious, unsettled look. “The entire city is out of food. The capital has been doing checks of every household, at least for reports. Everything is gone.”

“The admins are trying to keep it quiet, only letting our farmers know so we can send aid, but...it’s only a matter of time before everyone finds out.” Luminary already had a less than stellar reputation. Never mind the loonies who would gossip about plagues or acts of god, if people just thought this was a city-wide mismanagement of food? The capital city, no less? King Byakuya’s reputation was already in the trash, and while Takashi thought that’s what the young man deserved, this would make it near irredeemable. Anyone who was currently in a position of power in Luminary...well. It would be wise of them to never visit Dicea.

“...oh…”

Kaito started to worry his knuckles.

All the food?

All the food?

In the whole of the capital?

… how many…

Kaito closed his eyes. He was… he was pretty sure there were 65,000 people in the capital… something like that. Something like that… what had their tutors said...23% children? 16.5% elderly… the rest are adults, or close enough to count… right? Was he remembering that right? What’s 16.5 plus- 39.5? That can’t be right… that’s too large a percentage of people to be at risk… that’s too much… almost forty percent of the population at risk? That wasn’t even counting the infirm… that can’t be right. Kaito was… he was stupid. He was stupid. How long could a child go without food? How long could Tim go without food? How long did it take to ship food into the city? En mass. Enough food to feed 65,000 people until their normal reserves could be replenished. In country, maybe enough in time, but you’d have to take from this years crop. Thank god it’s spring. Thank god it’s spring. Thank god…

… Atua…?

Kaito closed his eyes for a moment, still cracking his knuckles. It was fine. It was spring. Atua… didn’t interfere. He wouldn’t of… there was no harm. He could imagine what Byakuya was doing right now, ordering all the available crops to be transported to the capital right away, and….

...Maki…

Kaito’s eyes widened, and he put his hands up and around his face, staring at the ground, like a horse with blinders on as he whispered “Oh no…”

Takashi grimaced as the slow realization took over Prince Kaito’s visage. In a pragmatic sense...the news didn’t mean much. Dicea was already preparing as fast as it could to send aid, and there was nothing a single person could do at this point, especially not a single person who wasn’t a farmer or merchant themself, and wasn’t already at the border. 

But on a human level? It was devastating. In a best case scenario, people could live without food for three weeks, and there hadn’t been any news about the city’s water being tainted too--so...that number could maybe go up to two months, though Takashi shuddered at the thought that the city wouldn’t have access to food for that long. However...in a city that big, there would be...a horrible number of people who weren’t in a best case scenario. Unless the city was able to get provisions from its nearest neighbors and give out rations to their most vulnerable members within...maybe a week? People would die. 

...and...if some of the rumors about Luminary were true...even if they did manage to get some rations quickly...they wouldn’t go to the most vulnerable members of society. 

“I’m so sorry…” Takashi murmured. It was horrible on a human level, but for someone who had grown up there, who had friends and family (one of whom was pregnant and would qualify as one of those vulnerable members) in the city...he couldn’t imagine how Kaito was feeling. Which was why he needed to tell him before Kaito was hit by careless comments in public, or worse, by his brother likely in the peak of stress. 

“Is there anything I can do for you? I can go, or get you someone, or...whatever you need?”

Oh fuck what was he supposed to do?

Kaito, in theory, knew the answer. He was… he was supposed to go back up to his room. Their room. He was supposed to tell his partners and… and… what? Wait for Shuichi to either have a panic attack or declare he didn’t care? Wait for his husband to burst into tears? Figure it out from there???

Oh fuck… fuck… he couldn’t handle that right now. This was already bad and it was about to feel worse. He could feel it. Like a fever in his brain that was slowly heating up. The full scope of it hitting him. Maki… oh no…

Kaito suddenly laughed. It was a strained, manic sound. But he calmed down immediately, and said to Takashi. “Well… the… the wars about to be over. One way or another… that’s… that’s worth celebrating!”

Standing up, Kaito turned to Takashi and gave him a bow, grinning. “Thank you so much for telling me. I really appreciate that. I think, before everyone finds out, I’m… gonna go get a drink. And… just have a drink. Or, maybe I’ll go to my shrine...no one knows yet right? You said that? Gotta… gotta be clear headed when my son finds out. I’m… sure he’ll be okay, but gotta be clear. I’m good! I’m so good. I…” Kaito blinked, “I’m gonna go find Waku. Thanks again, Takashi.”

Takashi’s worried look only grew. He...didn’t see how the food shortage would end the war but…

...okay. If Kaito wasn’t going to get shitfaced, wasn’t going to hole himself up in that closet then...he would leave this in Waku’s hands, though he had no idea what she would be able to do in this situation either. But as long as Kaito wasn’t about to hurt himself...then that’s all Takashi could do. 

“...alright,” he cautiously said. “Take care of yourself, Kaito. Last I saw, Waku was carrying some laundry upstairs, so...I hope that narrows down your search at least a little. I’ll see you later.”

With that, Takashi got up, hesitating as he wasn’t sure he actually wanted to leave the young prince on his own, but...he wasn’t babysitting the man, and it really showed that Kaito was trying to keep things together for appearances. He could give the man a moment alone to freak out over news that was freakout worthy. 

“Laundry? Okay. Thank you very much again.” Kaito said, bowing again, before heading off. 

If he went into the shrine, he wasn’t coming back out. If he went to a bar, he was probably coming out in worse shape than he went in. If he went back to his room… it’d just hurt too much. He just didn’t want to do it. He could stand that lost, helpless, guilty look on Kokichi’s face right now. The disdain and coldness in Shuichi’s. He couldn’t… he needed someone who would just… let him crumble a little. Just a little…

Then, when he told them? He’d be ready! He’d be ready! He could be the positive one! The one not a stiff breeze-- or a bad shock-- away from being bedridden again. First he just had to fall apart a little. Then he could be what they needed him to be.

(Somewhere in his mind, he knew Dr. Mariah wouldn’t approve.)

(...He’d do better next time. This time felt too hard. Next time.)

Kaito headed up the stairs, looked around, and sighed. Turning random corners… what were the odds he’d actually manage to find her. The castle wasn’t small…

(... what were the odds all the food in the capital would spoil?)

(...Atua?)

Waku was helping replace the sheets and towels on the fourth floor when she felt...a shock. A certain rhythm, a code she’d become more and more attuned to as the months went by and the sometimes empty, sometimes shattered feeling of the castle started to fill and align, becoming clearer. And this code...was all too clear. 

Her lips set in a line but her shoulders squared, Waku turned to Hajime, also on that floor--and technically her boss of sorts too. “Hajime, I gotta dip. Kaito’s freaking out, and there’s no one that wants to see him drink himself into a coma or lock himself in his shrine for days. I’ll do extra hours later, bye.”

With that she turned on her heel and trotted downstairs, following the rhythm only she could hear. (At least from a distance. While Waku could feel others’ emotions from even floors apart, if Kaito had gone back to their room, Kokichi would’ve noticed something even before he had a chance to look at his husband’s face.)

Hajime looked a little startled, “Oh, uh, alright then, that’s fin-okay, bye?” he managed to get out before she stormed off. Huh… he wondered if she had seen Kaito walk by or… huh.

Kaito was just starting to think that finding Waku was hopeless and that, well, he had tried, okay, so he might as well just… maybe he could buy some whiskey and just take it into the shrine with him… two birds with one stone… he wouldn’t drink that much… he’d be out of his shrine before the day ended… just a few hours… he could moderate… it’d be-oh thank god there she was.

Kaito lifted his hand to get her attention, though she seemed to be bee-lining right for him either way. “H-hey, Waku! Uh… I know you’re working… c-can I help you with the laundry? I uh… I can’t… do other things right now. Was hoping I could hang out with you?”

“C’mon, big guy,” she sighed, grabbing Kaito’s wrist and, after a moment of deliberation though she didn’t stop walking for a second, headed towards her room. If he was feeling like this, then he didn’t want to see Kokichi or Shuuichi. Healthy? Probably not! But talking with someone was better than his other coping methods.

“I got the okay from Hajime, you’re not keeping me from anything. You’re gonna sit on my bean bag, and I’m gonna give you a pillow to squeeze, and you’re gonna tell me what happened. We’ll figure out what to do from there.” Looking back, her expression softened for a moment. “...remember to breathe, Kaito. Deep breaths are cheating with how well they can help calm you down. Some bullshit with your nervous system, I think.”

“...Okay.” Kaito said, allowing himself to be led.

He tried to do the deep breaths thing. He breathed in heavy, and let it out… breathe in, let it out… kind of like with sex! Ha! Ha ha!! How long can someone hold out? How… how long…

… forty percent of the population.

Breathe in, breathe out.

Maki had the farms. Her people had the farms. 

Breathe in… breathe out…

...there was no more room for negotiation. Something had to happen. The revolution kept the army at bay because they had bags and bags and bags of salt ready, and they had already had to make one farm completely unusable to get their point across. It wasn’t safe to raid the farms… but Byakuya might choose to risk it and save what he could. Make a violent siege of the farmlands from the rebellion. Maki…

… or maybe he wouldn’t… and then what? Then what?

Breathe in… breathe out…

They got to Waku’s room, and his friend shoved a pillow in his arms, and Kaito squeezed it, sitting down in the bean bags… breathe in… breathe out…

“...I think Atua’s trying to kill my brother.” 

Waku got them settled and sat herself close enough to reach out to her friend, but far enough that he wouldn’t feel...pressured or caged. Kaito could be a touchy-feely guy, but usually only once he was starting to calm down--when the panic or rage was building, it was best to leave him with something to occupy his hands and enough space to breathe. 

And he was making a damn effort to breathe, even with… Waku’s eyes widened, just...completely taken off guard by something like that. A family and faith issue that would...definitely be this world-shattering. 

Waku frowned. “...can you talk about why? I’ll believe you if you just say that you have reason to think that an act of god has happened, but… For a loving god that doesn’t interfere to go so far as to specifically hurt one person, and then to...draw it out, so it’s not even confirmed? For one, I know that’s not the image of Atua you’ve learned and believed in at all, and two...even if gods don’t interfere...are there any other gods who reportedly have interfered? If it’s not Atua’s doing, and another act of god has happened...then there’s a chance another might try to undo what has been done. I don’t claim to know the will of any god, but...if something has happened? Then that possibility has opened.”

“...I don’t know?” Kaito realized, a bead of sweat falling down the side of his face, which didn’t have anything on the sweat pulling around his shoulders. “I don’t know anything about any of the… other… gods. I only know Atua. And, and… he doesn’t interfere, he never interferes… so why…?”

Kaito put his head back in his hands, trying to breath again… in… out… he winced, confused briefly about the pressure on his skull, and realized he was grabbing his hair between his fingers and tugging at it, and forcing his hands down, he grabbed the stone out of his pocket and the polisher out of the other one…

“...I’m sorry I keep coming to you for shit like this.” Kaito said, hands mindlessly polishing the stone, as he glanced guiltily at Waku, “It’s not really fair to you. I feel like we only ever hang out when I’m losing my mind over something… that’s so shitty on you I’m sorry... I just… I can’t go to my partners like this… it’ll just make things worse…”

Taking an unsteady breath… Kaito said uncertainly, ”I don’t… I don’t think it’s a secret? I mean, I’m sure my brother would prefer if it was, but how can you keep something like this a secret? Um… and look, I know this is way bigger than me… a lot of people are going to be affected by this. It’s not just a Momota problem… it just feels so… the timing…”

Kaito sighed, shaking his head, “Sorry.  Just got word that my city, the, uh, the capital city of Luminary… all of their food just spoiled. All of it… over 60,000 people just ran out of food… the revolutionary’s have the farms… my brothers not a monster. I don’t care what anyone says, he’s not a monster… he won’t let the whole city starve, just to save himself… he won’t… I don’t think he will…”

“It’s alright,” Waku soothed. “If it really was that we only hung out when there was shit bothering you, then, yeah, it’d sting a little, and even now I appreciate the apology, but...that’s not the case. We hang out just to shoot the shit too. So coming together to freak or commiserate? Is just part of the package.”

...but the fact that Kaito felt he couldn’t go to Kokichi or Shuuichi about this? It wasn’t a rare thing, but...well, Kaito had been open with her that they were getting relationship counseling together, and Waku had supported it! It was always a good idea to learn how to better communicate with the people you loved. But she kind of thought that as therapy went on, the number of things Kaito felt like he had to hide from his partners would dwindle, especially for the things that shook him so badly. 

And this, whatever it was, was really bad. 

Waku’s eyes widened, her tendency for blunt assurance falling away into dumb, horrified shock as Kaito told her something that was so much worse than ‘really bad’. An entire city running out of food, it all spoiling apparently so quickly that nothing could be done…

It made no sense. Naturally. Like the only way something like it happening would be because of...an act of god. ...and even if they were on a completely different level, it didn’t sound like the act of a loving god to punish over 60,000 people to...stick it to a handful, or to show support towards another group. 

Realizing she’d just been quiet, Waku let out a breath, her exhale shaking a little. “...shit…”

She clenched her braids. There was no changing your perspective to see things in a brighter light here. And accepting that there was nothing you could do...didn’t feel comforting in any way either. 

“...Kaito, I don’t know politics. I don’t know your brother, outside of what you’ve told me about him, and little bits of what I hear around. But even from those bits...he’s not the type that is going to idly let all those people die,” she softly started. As always, believing what she said, but just...not believing in their impact. “...that’s just an opinion from some random chick that lives in another capital.”

“...I think you should talk to Kokichi and Shuuichi about this.”

Waku’s expression turned a bit more stern as she looked at Kaito, the weight of the situation palpable in her gaze. “I know you worry about burdening them, about making things hard because of their respective health issues right now...but this is a crisis, and both of them are stronger than your worries sometimes paint them to be. And...I think outside of the admins? And I know you don’t want to talk to them; your partners might be the best people in Dicea to see what this looks like.”

“...and they’re your partners. You should be able to go to them with tragedy. Even if Shuuichi isn’t always the most empathetic person when it comes to talk about Luminary, he should be able to understand and see and care about how it’s hurting you. He cares about you, so there’s where his investment is.”

“If not your opinion, then whose?” Kaito murmured, realizing there was something depressingly accurate in that question. He didn’t know who else to talk to… though he sighed a little as, essentially, Waku answered his murmured question.

Kaito fiddled uncomfortably with his meditation stone, frowning at her argument… “Kokichi’s going to find out on his own, eventually. Someone will tell him. I know I can’t hide it from him… and I just… I know he’s strong, Waku… when he can be… but he’s so slow and tired lately. There’s something… something’s wrong with him. And he takes everything so personally… he’ll hear about all the food spoiling and spend the rest of the damn week wondering what he could have done differently and blaming himself for things he had no control over… and sometimes that gets really bad, Waku! He falls apart! And I… we can’t both fall apart at the same time! I can’t be pulling my hair out and freaking out when he finds out! And I just… want to… for a little bit…” Kaito confessed, sighing and resting his head on his knees, massaging his temple with the bones of his knees. “...and I know how shitty all that sounds. Who fucking wants to fall apart? If I can keep it together, I should. I just… I’ve never liked losing it in front of other people. Even that by itself kind of sucks. But freaking out in front of Kokichi…” Kaito sighed.

“... maybe he would be okay.” Kaito muttered. “ I don’t know. He’s been working on it. And its so hard to tell what’s gonna do it… maybe it’d be fine…”

...Kokichi really hadn’t been doing well lately. Well, emotionally, at least from what Waku felt whenever they spent a little time together, he was pretty okay. Steadier with every month that went by, and when she teased him about finally joining the rest of the class in getting therapy he’d just rolled his eyes and shoved her shoulder a bit. A reaction that she would’ve never expected from Kokichi a year ago, even if he could have his moments of incredible strength and flexibility. 

He was still sensitive, but honestly Waku liked it about him, both as a friend and as her prince. He just wouldn’t be Kokichi without his bleeding heart. 

But...well...the whole castle was aware. The pale spots in his cheeks and the shadows under eyes that would just look at nothing sometimes. A slowing, soft gait, where otherwise they knew he’d be skipping around for no reason instead. Some people were getting even more worried since...this was an abnormally long holding period, but Kokichi’s health had gone through major changes so...no one really knew what his normal looked like anymore. 

All they could do was just...wait. And hope they’d be around when--not if--he collapsed so they could take him to medical as soon as possible. 

And while shocking, tragic news wasn’t the best thing, historically, for Kokichi…

Waku sighed. “...call it a hunch, or maybe too much faith in my prince, but...I think you two could talk about it alright.”

“But,” she stressed, leaning forward towards Kaito a bit, “I’m not saying that I’m kicking you out to go talk to them right now, or even that I’m advising you to tell them tonight. I mean, since he’s an admin too, I’d imagine that someone would pull Kokichi away sooner than later...but that’s not a time limit you have to constrain yourself by, Kaito.”

She huffed, before softening her voice again. “...and it’s okay to want to freak out too, though I hope you don’t actually end up pulling your hair out. This is…” Waku had to pause, a rush of just...how monumentally awful the situation was hitting her again as she sighed. “This is freak out worthy. I guess it can be admirable to hold yourself together, be there for others, maybe do what you can to help, though I don’t think anyone in Dicea but the admins can really...do anything about this… But among all the people around here right now...the people this affects the most are you and your son. That doesn’t diminish the...the grief and sorrow other people might have, but it does mean that the people holding themselves together and banding up should be your family, for you and your son.”

“Yes, it would probably be better for his own psyche if Tim didn’t see you in full panic mode. But that’s on your family to comfort him and explain things until you’re ready--which shouldn’t be forever, but you can and should take time to just...let this hit you.”

Waku gave her friend a gentle look, reaching out to hold a hand to his shoulder for a moment, gauging where he was on the ‘is touching okay’ scale. “...which is why I invited my good friend Kaito into my room, so he can take some time to just...be. I don’t have anywhere else to be today, but I do think you should see at least your partners at dinner, so you can let them know that...well, you’re not okay, ‘cause no one should be okay with this, but that you’re here and existing.”

She paused for another moment before asking, “I’m not gonna just ditch ya, but can I tell Haneda that there’s some big Luminary news about to circle, so she can steer Tim away from it until your family has a chance to talk?”

“God, fuck, yes, please do that…” Kaito said, running his palms over his eyes, the cool smoothness of the stone easing the heat in his head for a bit. “...Right. Right. Tim. I gotta… thank you. I… fuck, that’s a good idea… yes, please Waku, if you can give Haneda a heads up, that’d be hugely helpful… and I just…”

Kaito sighed, looking up at her with a tired, not entirely calmed down expression, but less ‘I’m about to fucking lose it’ quality, “Thanks, man. I appreciate ya looking out. I’ll just… I just need a little bit to sit in my stupid fucking feelings and just… figure out what… what I’m going to say and… and just get my head on a little straighter. And then I’ll go to dinner and figure this out with the others… thanks Waku.”

“S’what I’m here for. There may not be a whole of things we can do for Luminary right now...but there are things we can do for you. And in times of crisis, the efforts of a community are invaluable.” She dug her knuckles into his arm a little, not trying to make light of the situation, or force cheer into her friend, but...she really couldn’t say something like this with total, serious sincerity. She wasn’t Kokichi. “You’re our family here. We’re gonna take care of you.”

Sitting back, Waku reached over to the chest at the end of her bed, pulling a few more pillows to flop between them. “I’ll pop out to catch her before she and Tim usually head out after homework time. But until then, and then after until dinner, I’m yours, dude.”

She might not have been trying to force cheer onto him, but Kaito gave her a small, appreciative smile, both at the words and at the knuckles in his arm. “Thanks.” He said softly, before taking one of the offered pillows, arranging them, before, indeed, ‘flopping’ back on some of them, staring at the ceiling, leaving plenty of space for her to flop as well, if she chose too.

“...it’s definitely not a coincidence that all the food in the capital spoiled at once, right? I’m not crazy… someone did that on purpose.”

...seeing a smile, if only for a moment, was a good sign. Waku let herself roll next to her large friend, taking just a bit of care to make sure she wasn’t wrapping herself up in her braids. Shit could get dangerous. 

“You’re not crazy,” Waku grunted. “There’s no way something like that happened by accident… If it was just one or two storage areas? Yeah, sure. Maybe inspections got muddled or mixed up, maybe it was...some sort of internal rot that spread quickly and was hard to spot by sight. A little careless, but it could happen.”

“But all the food? Fast enough that we didn’t get news about a shortage, but that it’s all gone?!” Waku slapped her hands over her eyes. “...I don’t even know if I can believe it was organized either. It’s just...too much, too fast, simultaneously. There has to be something more going on…”

“...Maybe I am crazy though.” Kaito muttered, just idly rubbing the stone between his palms, looking deeply uneasy as he said, “Cause, like… it’s either an act of god, which… almost seems like the most rational option, at the moment. But Atua… wouldn’t sacrifice the safety and lives of all those people… I’m just… that goes against everything I believe…”

“... but I can think of someone who might… who would hugely benefit from this, and just… just might be… be ruthless enough…” Kaito sighed, closing his eyes, “Nnnnngh… but it’s impossible. It’s literally impossible. It’s fucking… crazy… how??”

Dropping his hands, he sighed, “Maybe it’s literally all just a coincidence. Shit happens… it doesn’t have to be anyone’s, like, grand plan or anything. Maybe it’s just an act of nature… but my brother… my brother…”

Kaito closed his eyes, “He’s basically already dead. This is a perfect opportunity to demand his execution. It’s one of the only circumstances where everyone could be convinced. The elites, the commoners, even the temple...in exchange for all that food and all those lives? Even if Byakuya tried to refuse… which I don’t think he would. I really don’t think he would… fuck… what’s going to happen to his son…”

...Kaito had mentioned the revolutionaries had the farms. It was common knowledge that agriculture wasn’t widespread over the whole country like it was in Dicea. Sure, there were smaller scale sources, and any port town was fine from the ocean bounty and trade, but...cities that were in the middle of the desert, like the capital? As crazy as it seemed to make a city in the middle of a desert… As far as Waku understood, which, admittedly, wasn’t that much, cities like that were nearly completely reliant on holding onto reserves and getting supplements from outside the city. 

...not even taking into account if they were behind it, the revolutionaries would be idiots not to take advantage of this. They had an undeniable, if cruel, hold over the capital, and to leverage it to force a concession…

“...I have...no idea if the revolutionaries could’ve even pulled this off. Kokichi would know the logistics of even a guess more than me, but...they would need hidden allies in the city to do it. A lot of them. Either enough to both get to all the food in the city quickly, and enough on top of that to not be found out, which at that point, I don’t know why they wouldn’t have just stormed all the nobility in the city… Or every single person who would ever be in charge of keeping track and testing food. And in both scenarios, you’d need all those people willing to be not only suicidal, but willing to put all their loved ones and people they know have nothing to do with the war, other than the fact they live in Luminary too, on the chopping block. And I...don’t see either of those making any sort of sense.”

And if it was just...a coincidence? 

Waku sighed, fixing her headband from sliding back on her head as she stared at the ceiling. She’d learned a lot about Luminary through her friendship with Kaito and the general notices the admins tried to disseminate through the country. And she was trying hard to consider all this through that sort of perspective. 

“...does he have any allies that would be willing to sneak him out of the country? And Marigold too? Even if they demand an execution...maybe he’d be able to request one that’s easier to fake? Despite personal feelings, we both know Kokichi would be willing to set them up in a new life in secret.”

Kaito… frowned.

“...Maybe for Marigold and the baby. Marigold has bigger responsibilities to Atua right now, it’d be more than understandable for her to run… but Byakuya? He’s… he’s king. He… if he ran… it’d be extremely cowardly… I don’t know what Byakuya thinks about stuff like that. He’s… he’s a lot of things. A lot of those things are terrible… like, really terrible… but he’s not a coward.”

“...I’d rather he’d run. Maybe it’s something I should talk to him about. But Byakuya has a duty to Luminary. So long as he keeps Marigold and his son safe? It’d be more irresponsible for him to leave Luminary to its fate, than to stay and try to organize this… I don’t know. Maybe my father would have… disagreed. Sometimes I got the feeling watching him that…” Kaito hesitated, realizing he was speaking too loosely. He wasn’t supposed to say stuff like this aloud… but he continued, hesitantly, “...that Luminary was just some annoying distraction from his real passion, which was… well, honestly? Dicea. Byakuya used to say that the best thing that could have ever happened to Luminary, was for Dicea to not exist. Then maybe everyone could focus…”

“But I think he was wrong, about that. I know it was a good thing… but sometimes I think the end of the war was the single worst thing to happen to my family. Maybe not to Luminary, maybe not eventually. But my family? Everything fell apart, after the war was done. It’s hard not to… feel conflicted…”

Giving Waku a worried look, he said, “Please don’t repeat that to anyone. I know that’s a shitty, selfish way to think. I don’t want anyone to know that the thought comes up to me, every now and again. It just… sorry, I really do put too many things onto you… thanks for not… you can tell me if it’s too much. I can stop…”

Waku sighed softly. “That’s the kind of perspective you really need Kokichi for… I can’t imagine myself as anything but who I am. I can’t wrap my head around the perspectives of...personal things, and then reaching outside yourself to consider all those extrinsic responsibilities too. This might sound cruel, but...I think the only people who would actually care if your brother stayed for his own death, or faked accepting an execution would be him, Marigold, and you. And, like, maybe Kokichi and Shuuichi. Though, I don’t know how much thought the average person in Luminary puts towards people they execute after they’re dead. Maybe it’s more than I think, though I do have a hard time believing there are millions of people out there that take time each day to think about legacies of people they might not have even met.”

She was quiet for a bit, letting Kaito get out his thoughts, and...they were kind of worrying. Even trying to understand where he was coming from didn’t erase that Waku had grown up on the other side of that war. But it was that understanding that tempered her reaction to another sigh as she gently punched her friend’s arm. “That’s kind of fucked up, dude, I’m not going to tell you it’s not. But it’s understandable. And I know you’re tired of hearing me say this when we hang out, but that’s definitely something you should talk to your therapist about. I’m not telling anyone shit about stuff you confide in me about, but some of it is stuff you should discuss with a professional.”

“...it really sucks that you can’t, like...hit a pause button, and ask everyone what the hell they’re thinking. Or ask them what they hell you’re thinking. It’s not fair that we have to go around helpless and guessing for things, but...it’s how it is. At least there’s usually a few people you can ask.”

“Yeah, I know…” Kaito sighed, “I just feel like I know what she’ll tell me. My therapist, I Mean. What everyone will tell me… that it was our own faults. Which… yeah, it was. But it doesn’t feel any better to think it. I don’t want to think the worst of my own family. I don’t want anyone to convince me to… hate them or whatever. I didn’t hate them in Luminary, I don’t hate them now. But I feel like everyone in my life is like… rooting for me to hate them. Like actively hoping I’ll just wake up one day and be like ‘Fuck the Momota’s’. Ugh…”

“People celebrated when my parents died. People will… celebrate if… Byakuya dies. Hell, there will probably be plenty of people celebrating, here or there, if Kaede died. People cheer when a Momota dies…” Kaito closed his eyes, brow furrowed, “...people will probably celebrate, one day, when I die… it’s… it’s a lot, sometimes. It’s hard not to get angry. Sometimes I just want to scream at everyone to leave us alone. No one I know is solely responsible for the situation in Luminary. We all inherited it. My father was… never suited for it, but everyone told him it was his regardless. Byakuya’s been king for five minutes. Kaede…” Kaito sighed, “...maybe she’ll do better. She’s basically guaranteed to be queen, now. Maybe Kaede will redeem our name… who knows.”

Taking a breath, Kaito sighed. “I think I’m feeling less panicky now. Now I’m just… fucking sad. Which is objectively better than feeling like my skin’s gonna catch on fire. Thanks, Waku…”

“Just because something’s right doesn’t mean it doesn’t radically suck.”

Waku had no love for Kaito’s family, but...even seeing the toll on some of her coworkers, hearing the lingering grief on people in town, though it had definitely been worse throughout the war and when the veterans returned, even being a person that mourned life? She didn’t have any strong hatred from them either. Would she have preferred if the Momotas had never waged war on Dicea? Absolutely. Was she going to curse their names everyday because they did? No. 

And...it was on an entirely different level, she knew. And even how she and Kaito felt about it was different. But hearing people celebrate all the exiles and iso’s and sentences of the people in the LRG… Personally, Waku had gotten to be happy about them too. But sometimes it still hurt to hear people scoffing and being dismissive of and celebrating the destruction of something that had practically been her whole life. Grief and resentment and shame… She knew it wasn’t the same, but there was something she could understand about it. 

(And she knew, logically, that while none of Kaito’s family had been solely responsible for the situation in Luminary, they weren’t innocent of it either. But he didn’t need to hear that now.)

“...if it’d make you feel better, I’d probably fight anyone who celebrated your death. You’re my friend, and really beloved to a lot of people. That’s really shitty to do in public… And while I know it probably doesn’t help now, because it did happen, it was shitty for people to do that for your parents too. No one needs public ridicule for that…”

Curling an arm under her head, Waku nodded a bit. “It sucks when lying on the floor being sad is an upgrade...but here we are. Any time, Kaito.”

-

Kaito, when he was finally ready to leave the safety of Waku’s room, checked on the clock, sighed, and headed down to the dining hall. He really had spent a good couple of hours there… he hoped he hadn’t worried Kokichi and Shuichi too much. He had just kinda vanished on them…

Waku had, indeed, talked to Haneda, and when Kaito looked around the dining room, he saw no sign of his son or his nanny. Maybe they were eating in his room, or she had taken him out somewhere where overhearing rumors was less likely. Kaito would have to talk to him before the day ended. Kaito kind of hoped Timothy wouldn’t care, at the end of the day. He hadn’t left the capital with the Luminary Party. They had picked up him, and other various jobs, on the way to the border. He might not know anyone in the capital at all to worry about.

...Tim could be a really clever kid, sometimes. He’d probably be able to work out Maki was in a position to be making… serious plays. Which put her in more danger now than she had been before…

Or maybe it wouldn’t occur to him. The kid was nine. 

Now, where was his…

In all, Kaito hadn’t been too missed. Kokichi had fussed over Shuuichi for a little bit, helping him get all the specific pillows and blankets he wanted for a nap, making sure he had a glass of water on the nightstand within reach, and all those good things, but...Shuuichi hadn’t been out for long before Kokichi found himself crawling into bed too and passing out right beside his boyfriend. 

He was okay!

But a nice afternoon nap sounded amazing. 

It was really only chance that Kokichi managed to wake up in time for dinner. Which was...kind of weird. He would’ve assumed Kaito would be there to wake them, teasing about sleeping the day away, but...well, it wasn’t Kaito’s job to do that, and Kokichi shouldn’t just expect him to always be there. He’d probably gotten caught up after talking with Takashi. 

But! They were still on course for still making it to the start of dinner! So it was fine. 

Kokichi roused Shuuichi, blearily got some mumbles about food preferences and cravings, and because he wasn’t Kaito, Kokichi simply left Shuuichi to fall back asleep, promising to be back with dinner soon. 

And hopefully he’d see Kaito there!

Kokichi breathed in deeply when he entered the dining hall, still a little sleep-mussed, his mouth watering at the scent of the vegetable soup and...what looked to be a seafood and vegetable noodle dish...mmm…

Kaito hadn’t expected Kokichi to come in after him, but as he glanced over his shoulder, “Oh! Babe. There you are…” Glancing around the dining hall, Kaito asked, “Shuichi decide not to come down?”

Kokichi perked as he spotted his husband, eagerly trotting over to his side. “Nah, Shuu-chan said he wanted to sleep in a little more, so I’m bringing food up. You wanna do that? Or did something come up? It’s not like I really expect you to just watch us nap, but…”

Kokichi had meant to shrug good-naturedly, and he got about halfway there before he noticed something...off about Kaito. He couldn’t quite place a finger on it, but… Frowning softly, Kokichi looked up at Kaito. “...is everything alright?”

It was incredible, how Kaito’s first instinct was to say ‘yeah’. He literally felt the word on his tongue before he even realized he was saying anything, a grin already trying to tug at his face. After everything they had gone over in therapy, and his own therapy, and talking to Waku, Kaito’s first instinct was still to grin and insist he was good…

“...Maybe not.” Was Kaito’s compromise with himself, rubbing the back of his beck uncertainly, “... I don’t know. I think I have news?”

Kokichi frowned a little more, his worry more apparent on his face as he was quiet for a moment, thinking. Then, when he looked up again, the worry was still there, but it was smoothed. Closer to a calm, neutral face than anything. “...should we step out for a bit, or should we get food and go back up to Shuu-chan?”

“Uh, it’s not… urgent or anything. We should get food. Everything always harder on an empty stomach. And our Shuichi definitely needs to eat. He’s eating for two! And Miyako’s getting so big…. Definitely gotta keep him fed. She’s gonna need that baby fat. Little fat baby arms and legs…” Kaito was somewhat rambling by this point, but he was looking around the tables, “He tell you what he was hoping to eat? Or just grab anything? Do you think he’s craving one of those weird things he’s always drinking these days? What’s with the whole ‘spicy food’ and ‘vinegar’ thing? Sugar makes sense, sugar at least tastes good…”

Kokichi nodded, relaxing just a little--at least not urgent news…--and led them over to where the food was laid out, taking up some plates and handing one, then two as Kaito kept his hand out, over to Kaito, starting to get dinner. “He’s in a vinegar swing again. Luckily there’s pickled radish for a soup topping… I know cravings are supposed to be what your body needs, like, nutrition-wise, but I really have no idea what his are supposed to mean…”

Despite the tension in his shoulders never really leaving, Kokichi snorted and sent his husband an amused look. “To get you to admit that sugar tastes good...wow. I’ll never get over how much you hate things that have taste...oh, hun, you’ll wanna avoid that. Super spicy, believe me.”

It was a practiced routine between them, and before long they’d rustled up a large tray (and a smaller tray that Kokichi had pouted at, but accepted) to carry their plates, bowls, cups, and utensils upstairs easily, Kokichi eager to eat, but...anxious about what news Kaito had. 

“I’ve got the door, hun--go right in.”

“That's spicy? But it’s so pretty.” Kaito pouted, looking at the little flecks in the slightly reddish mashed potatoes, before begrudgingly passing it up. Ruining perfectly good mashed potatoes…

Heading upstairs with their trays, Kaito scoffed, “I don’t hate things with taste, and I know sugar is good. I just don’t see what’s the fuss of having lots and lots of it. Moderation in all things, babe!”

Heading into the room, Kaito put the large tray down on the desk, before taking Kokichi’s tray from him and setting it beside it, starting to organize the meals, glancing over at Shuichi, who was slightly drooling into his pillow. “Probably should wake up our Shuichi. He needs to eat… and, uh, he probably needs to hear the news too. Also, I need to go talk to Tim after this… again, it’s nothing urgent. Nothing any of us can do about it. Just something maybe all of us should talk about before people start talking at us or around us a bit. Luminary stuff, you know how it goes…”

That...didn’t bode well. True, with pretty much anything about Luminary, people started getting a little weird around them, but...Kokichi didn’t know. Maybe it was just his dream about Maki making him anxious, but any news about the war just…

Kokichi swallowed and took a breath, centering himself. There was nothing they could do about...pretty much any situation. Eat dinner and talk, and figure out how they wanted to handle other people talking about it. 

Nodding, Kokichi gave his husband a soft look before he climbed back up on the bed, gently trying to rouse Shuuichi. “Shuu-chan, I’m back with food. I found Kai-chan too! Ya gotta get up so we can eat…”

Shuichi mumbled something entirely indistinguishable but, based on the way he pulled the pillow over his head, probably consisted of something about not wanting to get up yet. Kaito, with a small roll of his eyes, headed over to the bed and, leaning over, peeking beneath a small hole in the pillows, where Shuichi blearily glared back at him, “Eat something, then you can go back to sleep handsome.”

More grumbling, probably something said not entirely flattering to Kaito.

“I have news about Luminary. It’s kind of important.”

… more grumbling, but then a sigh. Shuichi pulled the pillow off his head and, blinking blearily still, sat up with a grunt, before leaning back against the head rest, his hair all over the place as he yawned, “...how important?”

“Probably pretty important. No one’s dead, but people are probably gonna spend some time telling you their condolences. I just don’t want you to be taken off guard. It’s gonna spread like wildfire pretty soon, I bet.”

Shuichi sighed, “...Okay. But pass me my food first, please. I smell something there that smells really good… I think it’s the soup. I definitely want that.”

“Mhm.” Kaito agreed easily, going to collect Shuichi’s plates.

...no one was dead. So what was worth various sympathies…?

Don’t start guessing. Kaito’s going to tell you in a moment anyway, and preconceived notions will make everything worse. 

Still Kokichi sent his husband a worried look as he settled down with his own food on one of their night stands. Everything was warm (that was supposed to be warm) and delicious and...he could only watch Kaito’s movements as they all settled down to eat.

Munching on his noodles, Kokichi nodded vaguely. “I added extra pickled radish for you, and put more extra on your plate too. It was the most vinegar-based thing I could find for you. And I wasn’t sure if you’d want spicy stuff even if you’re not craving it? So I only got a little of those mashed potatoes, but I’ll eat them if you’re not feeling it.”

...he could only hold out so long, barely waiting for them all to get a little food in them before blurting. “...what happened?”

Kaito put down his fork, idly poppin the joints in his hands, as he said, “The capital… Luminary’s capital. They’re having a bit of a crisis that started today. Nothing that won’t be fixed, but their food supplies all suddenly molded. Everything’s inedible. So, there’s going to be a lot of fuss in trying to restore the food supply in time before there’s any long term effects. It’s probably going to be a bit of an event for a while. Like I said, a bit of a crisis.”

Kaito had decided that trying to talk about it casually might be the best approach, like a national food crisis was an inconvenience, and not something as monumentally life changing as it was going to be, not to mention incredibly dangerous in its own right. He was seriously doing his best, feeling convinced that he had gotten it all out of his system with Waku… but his neck was as tense as stone, and what he was doing with his knuckles was nothing short of abuse, pulling at them hard, trying to keep himself calm. Losing it in front of Waku was one thing. He had to be better around his partners. 

Shuichi had been in the middle of happily eating his pickled radish-- mmmm, that was the stuff-- but as the gravity of what Kaito was saying hit him… he lowered his spoon. Giving Kaito a tense, nervous look as he said, “That’s impossible. Someone’s lied to you, Kaito. Who told you this?”

“...Man, if he did? I’m going to lose my mind on him…” Kaito chuckled grimly, “Takashi? I’m pretty certain that’s his name. Event planner guy, metal arm, caught Shuichi falling out of a wind-”

“I know who that is.” Shuichi interrupted, a slightly annoyed twitch in his increasingly worried face. “That’s still impossible. Someone lied to him then… or we’re just finding out he’s an asshole...”

At first...Kokichi didn’t understand. Why there had been so much gravity to it, but Kaito was talking so casually now, and...well, because of that, then...he just meant the castle reserves, right? That would be difficult and would require extra supply, but...the Luminary castle wasn’t like Dicea’s castle. There were still a chunk of people living there, but they were fewer than in Dicea, and people didn’t just drop by for meals either. So why…

But Kaito’s body followed the gravity he’d alluded to before, so...when he said capital, did he really mean…

Kokichi’s gaze widened in confusion and disbelief and...if it was true? Utter horror. But...there was no way something like that could… He shook his head a little, eyes re-focused, but no more enlightened. “Takashi can be prone to exaggeration, but...usually only for good things. If anything, he can be a bit overly brief with negative things… But I’ve never known him to be a liar like that…” ...maybe gullible? But he didn’t seem to be the type to spread around this kind of rumor without checking it out first. 

His brows drawing in, Kokichi’s voice was even and soft. “...Kai-chan, did he say where he heard about this?”

Had he? Kaito was certain he had. Most of the later part of that conversation was a blur now, Kaito just entirely aware that he was on the verge of self-destructing again and needed someone’s help. Frowning, Kaito thought back…

“...the admins got a call from Luminary. That’s what he said.” Kaito said after a moment of thinking about it. “Takashi said he wanted to give me a heads up before the rumor mill had a chance to tell me. I didn’t… sorry, maybe I should have gotten this confirmed by Aiichi before I said anything to you guys…”

“If that wasn’t what you were doing, where did you run off to all afternoon?” Shuichi asked, still mostly just confused now, less alarmed because...well, obviously it wasn’t true. 

“Uh, I got a little in my head about the whole thing, went to talk it out with Waku… Takashi made it sound like… like everything was gone? Including the food in peoples homes? He said they were checking house to house… it does sound unbelievable, doesn’t it?” Kaito realized, with a small, somewhat embarrassed frown. Had he been freaking out over something obviously fake? 

Shuichi sighed, returning to eating his pickled food, “It’s… it’s good you didn’t hole yourself up in the shrine instead, Kaito, but you really should have gotten it confirmed first. There’s no way everyone’s food in the capital rotted. Someone was trying to hurt you, or there’s some random, outrageous rumor going around. It’s obviously not true.”

“...he sounded so certain…”

If Takashi said that he overheard a call...or, more likely, the admins talking about a call they just had, maybe...he’d heard wrong? But...still! It was so absurd! Takashi would obviously want to get it clarified before telling Kaito, and even if no one was supposed to know yet, and they asked Takashi to keep it to himself...telling Kaito was still an absolutely valid request! Since Takashi apparently wanted to get out in front of the rumors, it wasn’t like it’d make much sense to start spreading it after he told Kaito...and, again, that wasn’t the sort of person Kokichi had known the scribe to be. 

...something about this didn’t feel right…

Slowly returning to his food--his partners would fuss if he didn’t eat, and...if something like that rumor was true? What an insult to waste what was on his plate…--Kokichi shook his head a bit. “...I’m gonna try and catch my dad after dinner. I can get clarification on what ‘Kashi might’ve heard, and...if he really did make it up…” Kokichi frowned deeper. “That’s really something not okay to joke about…”

There was a sort of… uncomfortable silence after that. The three of them all quietly eating their meals, ruminating over the now only ‘possible’ news. Kaito still feeling… like it was probably true, but simultaneously embarrassed if he had been taken in by what was, in hindsight, a pretty obvious lie. He’d have to apologize to Waku for wasting her time…

“...” Shuichi glared at his plate, before saying, “We need to confirm it’s not true. I’ll go talk to the king, I’ll be right bac-”

“Shuichi, no, relax, you don’t have to do that. King Aiichi’s going to be all the way down on the first floor, it’ll be quicker for me to pop down there, confirm it, and then head back up.” Kaito sighed, already putting his plate aside and standing up, “I should have checked earlier. I’ll go do it now.”

“Kaito… you understand that if it’s true, Maki’s-”

“Maki will be fine. We don’t have to be scared for Maki.” Kaito murmured. “And there’s no reason to be alarmed at all, if it ends up not being true. Let me go confirm it.”

...he had been going to go after dinner, to try and keep the pace of Kaito’s non-urgency, but…

As Kaito and Shuuichi gently quobbled at each other, Kokichi set all of his food down and quietly made his way over to the door. “I’m going. If this is an issue of Takashi’s trustworthiness as a government employee, then that’s my jurisdiction. If there really was a call this morning…” Kokichi glowered a little bit, “Then I want to know why no one told me when they got the call. I’ll be back in a moment.”

…

Kokichi was back in fifteen minutes, his face a bit ashen and the confusion not resolved, but there was a firmness in his expression as he looked between his partners. He nodded. 

Kaito’s eyes widened, briefly, before his shoulders slumped, staring grimly down at his hands, while Shuichi’s brow furrowed. “How bad? It can’t actually be every household…”

Kokichi’s hands were tense at his side as he went back to his seat. Really...really not in the mood to eat. But he would...eventually. “This morning, they discovered the castle reserves were rotted, and soon got reports from several noble houses over the same thing. They thought it was sabotage against the elite, and tried commandeering food from market storage...but it was the same there, and there were more people hurrying out to try and restock their personal food who ran into...I’m sorry, I think they were guards, but it might’ve gotten lost in translation. Someone who would be investigating a targeted attack, though. And as more people showed up, all saying the same thing...they started going through the city, looking everywhere. All of our contacts that aren’t in the government confirmed the same thing...which was why I guess none of us heard until Takashi pulled you aside, Kai-chan. They were trying to confirm it…”

He shook his head again, disbelieving, but...there was no way practically the whole city would be on a prank like this, right? “As of the most recent update...about an hour and a half ago? There’s still nothing. Hundreds of testimonies of people saying their food was fine yesterday… It’s like it all rotted overnight…”

Again, Kokichi looked between his partners. “...I don’t understand...how?”

Kaito continued to look at his hands, an increasingly… defeated look on his face. He hadn’t realized how that brief moment of believing he had been fooled had filled him with so much… hope… over… it was all over…

Shuichi frowned, looking almost offended… like he really had been entirely expecting Kokichi to come back saying it had been a rumor going out of control and that Takashi had been fooled by… it couldn’t be…

...if it was, “It has to be sabotage. It has to be. There’s no way that happened by accident… maybe the elites are trying to punish the commoners for someth-”

“All of their food is gone too, Shuichi.” Kaito said softly.

“So they say. Maybe they’re trying to weaken the population, or…” Shuichi frowned, already thinking of some flaws in that logic, before trying again, “Or maybe it’s the opposite? The commoners just… hiding all of their food or… the city can’t actually be out of food. It’s literally, physically impossible.”

Kaito went back to eating his food, saying after a bite, “Thank you for getting it confirmed, Kokichi…” an increasingly lost and despondent look on his face. His gaze a thousand miles away… before he said, “It’s going to be okay. For the Luminary people, I mean. I know it all sounds scary now, but we’re right at the start of spring. All the crops are ripe and ready for harvest… there will be some issues in the future, sure, because the crops are meant to last longer than they’ll be able to now, to make up the deficit, but I’m certain… I’m certain they’ll work that out. It’ll be okay…”

Kokichi knew how Shuuichi felt, but...that was half of what the admins were doing all day. Kokichi had found his father in the scribe’s office, writing away letter after letter while the privacy of the phone room was barely assured, people going in and out so much. Ryouhei had actually looked awake. 

Sabotage or a mind game from people hiding food, or...some sort of hidden virus, or a fast-acting one, or, somehow, a mass replacement...every plausible theory had been brought up and debunked. It was impossible but...the Luminary capital was legitimately out of food. And while it was anticlimactic to the highest degree, all the work resulted in Kokichi slowly shaking his head at his boyfriend. 

He looked down at the rest of his dinner, thought of the large bounty downstairs, the plants thriving in the greenhouse, a pantry he’d never been in still, but he knew it was large and stocked...Kokichi thought of all of this and felt guilty. 

But just for a moment. 

He took a sip of his juice and took a breath, facing his partners again. “...that’s part of what my dad’s been working on today. He’s writing to our farmers and trying to work out deals to buy more crops wholesale, so we can trade them to Luminary at a reduced rate to avoid putting them or ourselves in debt. And because of our existing deals, some of that is going to independent merchants and traders so it’s not entirely reliant on the government to distribute food.”

There was a waver in Kokichi’s “leader face”, a small trembling in his lips that betrayed just...how genuinely terrifying the situation was to him. “...we’re trying to send over immediate relief, but sending cargo through the mountains,” through territory the revolutionaries held, and...would likely not want relief to reach the capital before their opportunist demands were met, “Will...take some time…”

...time a lot of people likely wouldn’t have, even with relief from neighboring cities and towns. 

...he had wished for this war to be won without death. Now...instead of figureheads fighting at the guillotine...countless people who would likely be suffering under both Byakuya or Kaede would be paying the price. 

Kokichi swallowed thickly. He believed in Maki. It wasn’t the same to her, he knew, but she had cared about the people that either side of the society this war looked like in Luminary had dismissed. Please, Maki...end this before they all die…

“There, see? Even better. That’ll help.” Kaito muttered.

“...” Shuichi looked between Kaito and Kokichi, clearly debating with himself, “...Kaito, Maki’s at those farms-”

“Yeah, I know.”

“They’re going to be desperate. They’ll send a full blown siege on them-”

“I don’t think they will.” Kaito said simply, now just kind of pushing his food around, “No one wants a city full of people to starve. No one is going to tolerate it. The wars basically over, now. All we’re going to be hearing about in the next week, probably, is the end results of the negotiations.”

“Kaito, your brother… he’s not going to just give up. He’s not like that.”

“You’ve only ever seen the worst sides of Byakuya. He’s not cruel. I mean… not always. He’s not heartless. And he knows Maki, even if no one else would… raiding the farms will be too dangerous. They’ll risk losing the crops, if it doesn’t go perfectly. If they lose those crops? Thousands of people will die… and no one’s going to let that happen. Not in the capital. Not in their own streets. I know you don’t have any faith in Luminary leadership… heh…” Kaito smiled grimly, “Waku said earlier that if Byakuya was executed, whether he lived or not, no one would care so long as he was gone… she didn’t say that last part, it was just… what it sounded like. Like Byakuya was just… like no one has any faith in him… maybe she’s right…”

Kaito frowned, stabbing back into his plate as he said, “But they’re wrong. My brother will make the choice best for Luminary. No one will like him any fucking better for it… but I know he’ll do it. He’s a good king…” Kaito closed his eyes, gritting his teeth, “...he would have been a good king…”

Kokichi looked at Kaito sadly as he defended his brother. From the first thing he had ever heard about Byakuya, Kokichi had hoped he would live up to his brother’s expectations. His belief and pride. 

Byakuya never had. But that didn’t mean he was wholly incompetant or wholly selfish. 

“...I believe that Byakuya’s trying to do everything he can to keep people from starving. That’s the whole reason he’s done...anything since he became king.” Kokichi’s lips thinned as his hands balled in his lap, but his eyes were dry and his voice was even. “The only thing putting him at odds with Maki-chan directly? Is the Indentured Program. The thing he was going to expand to get Luminary more money so the famine won’t be an issue. And he knows it’s the only thing keeping Maki-chan in the revolution. That’s why Marigold offered her siblings.”

“Until now, it hasn’t been enough. Concede the program and...the Luminary economy tanks and the revolutionaries...maybe lose some morale. Maybe it’s made up by winning one of their points. In Byakuya’s shoes, it was only a loss.”

“...But now…” Kokichi’s voice went strangled for a moment, and he took a breath, closing his eyes before continuing on, calm. “...but now there’s not a famine happening in a few years. There’s a food shortage that’s going to result in deaths in weeks if something doesn’t happen. Food from other cities will help some people, but they need the food from the farms. The farms are controlled by more than just Maki-chan, but...her loss would be a loss of defence, and a loss of morale that even getting the program shut down wouldn’t make up for in the face of a food crisis.”

“...it takes time and preparation to make farmland unusable. That sort of threat is something, potentially, Byakuya could see worth the risk to get there before they were done, and take the food.” Kokichi sighed, closing his eyes. “...it would take far less notice to torch this years’ harvest and condemn a significant portion of the capital to death. Less time that even a lookout tower would be able to notify the farms.”

“If an army marched while Maki-chan’s there...Byakuya’s killing his people. I don’t know anyone else in the revolution besides Kaede but...I seriously think there wouldn’t be anyone else willing to kill thousands of people in a few hours to stand on a point of stopping the program. It would kill Maki-chan...but she would do it.”

“...if he concedes the program, then he’s bought time to figure out how to make a trade economy not based around using people as property. Or...bought time for someone else to figure out how to do that.”

Kokichi’s shoulders slumped as he opened his eyes, his expression grim but not breaking. “...we’re waiting on time.”

Kaito winced lightly at that last point, but, well… he couldn’t argue that wasn’t what Byakuya was trying to do. Kaito knew Byakuya’s relationship with the Indentured Program was… complicated. He seemed to think that it was the issue of not enforcing the rules of the contracts that were the issue, not the program itself… at one point, Kaito had agreed with him. He had looked at Shuichi and Maki as success stories, for the program. They had only had a few years left on their contracts…

Now, though, his stomach twisted bitterly at the thought. Shuichi and Maki should have been free in a few years… but, well, both of their mentors, in turn, should have been free decades ago. And, somehow, their contracts kept getting renewed, every time… and even if that wasn’t the case? His friends… his friends had suffered more in the program than Kaito had ever liked to think about. Things they hinted at but never talked to him about… maybe because they couldn’t talk about it? Or maybe because they hadn’t thought he could handle hearing about it…

Maki was willing to risk anything and everything, to get this program shut down. And she was a ‘success’ case.

It… it wasn’t a good program…

“Everyone’s going to come to the same conclusions we’re coming to.” Kaito muttered, “There’s no way to import enough food to cover an entire city outside of the country, and getting enough food from other cities is going to have an incredible amount of pushback. I wouldn’t be surprised to hear there were panics of people thinking their own food was going to spoil, or people trying to hoard in case the crisis spreads… which, I guess, hopefully it won’t? That would be a nightmare… they need the food on those farms. They can’t risk anything but negotiations. Byakuya will see the logic in that, same way we just did. Anything else is… stupid or madness… Byakuya’s not either of those things… it’s basically already decided. We’re just waiting for it to play out.”

Shuichi gave Kaito a long look. “...are you going to talk to Byakuya?”

Kaito’s shoulders slumped, that despondent look back. “If he’ll make time for it, sure… I need to know what he’s planning to do with Marigold and the baby...”

...that was all the pragmatic stuff, which, if Kokichi had been forced to make a bet, he would’ve bet Byakuya had first thought of too, but… He had a pregnant wife. If not to get them somewhere where Marigold would be able to eat, then...maybe even considering getting her out of the public eye entirely. Kokichi had no way or knowing how the negotiations would turn--if Byakuya would keep his position and literally everything but the program would remain the same, if he’d keep his position but governmental structure would change entirely, if, in some crazy miracle that...didn’t make him as happy as he thought it should’ve, he and Kaede would take over leading Luminary together, if Kaede would take over without bloodshed, if she’d take over with bloodshed, if something entirely unexpected would happen… 

Kokichi was hit by a sudden sympathy. A pregnant mother shoved and beaten by a mob. 

Regardless of whether Marigold would return as queen or would need to flee permanently...it wasn’t safe for her to be literally at Byakuya’s side right now. 

...god, if it really was a virus...if the mold spread to other cities… Even with the extra aid, Dicea wouldn’t be able to support feeding all of Luminary...not even if they gave all their food, not that they ever could even entertain the thought. 

His part said, Kokichi tucked his legs against his chest and rested his chin on his knees, lifting his juice glass to rest against his forehead. He wasn’t hiding, wasn’t crying...but it was clear he felt the precipice of hopelessness this situation was on. “...have to wait on a lot of hopes…”

Honestly, considering his worst fears? Kokichi was handling this amazingly. Kaito had sort of assumed that they’d be making a trip to medical at some point, if only to get his tea, if nothing worse… but Kokichi had squared his shoulders and gotten it confirmed with his father and was, frankly, thinking about this pretty deeply without getting overly worked up… Kaito was impressed, honestly. He certainly hadn’t handled it this well when he had heard a few hours ago.

But Kaito could see it was starting to wear on him, and giving a quick glance at Shuichi, whos brow was furrowed slightly, likely… well, likely going over everything in his head, trying to see if he could see all possible outcomes to this, but otherwise looking okay, Kaito focused on Kokichi.

Scooting over to Kokichi, Kaito put his hand around his head, pulling Kokichi in a little bit, only jostling his juice a bit, before kissing against the side of his skull. “Hey… it’s not hopes, okay? It’s going to be okay. They’re not going to let anyone starve, they have a solution. They just need to… talk it out now. It’s really going to be okay. Big picture wise. Luminary can take care of itself…”

Giving Kokichi another kiss, he said quietly, “...you okay? Do you feel alright? I know that was a lot of news…”

Kokichi leaned into Kaito’s touch, belatedly adjusting his wrist to keep his cup level, but thankfully he didn’t feel any liquid slosh out over the sides. It had to be okay, because no one wanted people en masse in the capital to die and...he believed in the person it was hinging on. 

They had promised each other…

Kokichi sighed and worked his other arm around to set his cup back down, turning a little to hug around Kaito. “I’m okay...this just…” He sighed again. “I know there are a lot of people involved in this, in Luminary. Decisions will be made. And...we’ll just have to see how it goes.”

“...and I know this isn’t my problem, and what the admins are already doing is the extent of what Dicea can do for Luminary right now...but if something comes up that I can do something about? Please let me know. I know you would anyway, but...that’s just what I wanna say, okay?” Kokichi laughed with only a shadow of joy as he squeezed Kaito for a moment. 

“...you said you weren’t sure if you were okay earlier? How are you doing now?”

“...I don’t know.” Kaito admitted, leaning into the hug a little, again, giving Shuichi a worried look. The ex-detective still didn’t seem to have much more to say. Though his furrowed look was more sad and tired now. “I… have a feeling I might have a few… down moments soon. Especially depending on word of how things are going… I might be very sad, soon… but I feel kind of okay right now. Though, it might be a good idea for me to… talk to Miss Crystal tomorrow, maybe…”

“You can talk to us.” Shuichi said, giving Kaito a somewhat soft look now, “You know that, right?”

“...yeah. But I doubt what I even want to do is really ‘talking’. I’ll probably just need someone to rant like a crazy person to… you guys don’t need to deal with that. I don’t want you to deal with that. You both have already had to deal with too many of my breakdowns.”

“But, in the long run, everything’s always okay… if the worst happens? Atua will take care of my family…” Kaito frowned, before saying uncertainly, “and maybe the worst won’t happen. I don’t know. It all seems so obvious, how it’s going to play out, but I can’t actually see the future. Maybe things won’t be as bad as… it could be? Right?”

Kokichi nodded, squeezing Kaito’s hand gently, rubbing down the side of his finger. “You can talk to us, you can talk to Miss Crystal, you can talk to Waku… We all care about you, so we’ll be here for you in the sad moments. In all the moments, really. For whatever Kai-chan needs, there’s gonna be someone there for him.”

Fuck knew Kaito had been there for them. ...maybe not Miss Crystal, but she cared on a professional level, and that mattered too. 

“You never know what’s going to happen until it happens. Trying to predict...if you aim too high, it hurts. If you aim too low, you’re setting yourself up for misery in the waiting time. It’s maddening...but we just have to wait and see…”

Kokichi leaned over a little and placed a kiss on Kaito’s wrist. Then, his frown deepened. “...how are we going to tell Tim?”

Kaito really did feel okay right now, and he grinned slightly at the kiss, just… honestly feeling thankful that his partners… just held it together like this. Shuichi hadn’t said anything cruel yet, Kokichi was keeping it together… honestly, it was just a relief. Kaito knew he wasn’t being fair to both of them, that most of the things he was afraid of when it came to talking to them had happened at some of their lowest and most stressed out points… he just knew a few hours ago that he wouldn’t have been able to handle it. Had it gotten to that point… which, thankfully, it looked like it wouldn’t.

Though… Kaito sighed. “Waku asked Haneda to keep Tim occupied and away from people today. I didn’t want him to hear it from some… well, honestly, I just didn’t want him overhearing anyone saying anything cruel about it. The main thing I want to get across to him is that his mom’s going to be fine, and maybe gauge if he’s got anyone in the capital he’d be worried about…”

“Should we tell him Maki’s going to be fine?”

Kaito sighed. So close… “Shuichi, she will be. Byakuya’s not going to risk a full on assault. He wasn’t willing to risk a full on assault before this, he definitely won’t do it now. Maki’s in a position of strength right now.”

“Not if the other revolutionaries buckle under the pressure.”

“Shuichi, please, she…” Kaito looked over to Shuichi and finally saw the stress on his face. This wasn’t his boyfriend being cruel and contradictory. This was his genuine fears.

Giving Kokichi another kiss, he got up and scooted over to their partner, pulling him into a hug and rubbing his arm as he said, “Maki’s going to be fine. I know she’s not invincible. I know that we have a bad habit of treating her like she’s some force of nature… but just, logically, she’ll make it out on top of this. Luminary’s going to feel desperate, and Kaede will be arguing on Maki’s and the revolutionaries behalf, and Maki’s right next to the border… once this is sorted? She’ll have no reason to be in Luminary. She’ll be safe on the other side… she’s going to be fine.”

Shuichi leaned against Kaito, closing his eyes. Not quite convinced, but not up to arguing it either. “...like Kokichi said. How are we going to tell Tim?”

“Honestly, I was probably just going to sit in his room with him. Or maybe take him to the shrine. I’ve always wanted the shrine to feel like a safe place for him to be… I don’t think he gets the same comfort from it as I do though. Maybe I could invite Haneda to sit with us and we can talk about it as a group, if only to keep everyone on the same page. I don’t want him to worry… I figured so long as we don’t look worried, he won’t think there’s anything to worry about either.”

Kokichi frowned, but he was glad when Kaito went over to hold Shuuichi. They were all worried about Maki, but...Shuuichi needed that comfort right now. 

Byakuya wasn’t going to launch an assault on the farms. There might be some push back from some of the revolutionaries, not wanting to keep food from the capital, but...he just had to hope no one would be desperate enough for it that they resorted to killing. And if he was right and Maki was going to be the leverage point for getting extra crops...as soon as she felt like the program really would be shut down…

...she’d come home. 

Maki had promised to come back to them. And Kokichi had promised to welcome her back with open arms. To hug her tight and bawl. If he could restrain himself, after Tim saw his mom first. 

Kokichi looked over at his food, knowing he’d need to get back to it...but in a sec. “...I think talking about it as a group with Haneda is a good idea. It would give her more warning signs to look out for and...I dunno. I’d guess it’d leave Tim feeling less alone. More understood.”

...Kaito had tried not to look worried to them and...it kind of just made Kokichi worry more. Sure, Tim had a very different worldview, but… Kokichi chewed on his lip a little. “...if he does worry, though...that’s okay. It’s just our jobs to reassure him. And I know Kai-chan’ll do a good job at that.”

“I bet Time won’t believe us. I still barely believe it.” Shuichi muttered.

“We’ll get it done today. We’ll talk as a group, everyone will be on the same page, we’ll get ahead of the rumor mill. We’ve got this.” Kaito reassured again, feeling a little better himself about it all too, honestly. Again, he reserved the right to be very sad when new information came in… but for now, with Shuichi and Kokichi, it was easier to not feel like the world was caving in around him. Even when it kind of actually was.

...but, even when everything was falling apart… there was still the day to day stuff to work on. Wasn’t that the point? Why this sort of coping method was preferable to ‘days in the shrine’? Because Kaito still needed to be able to take care of the things he needed to take care of? Yeah. Yeah, he was pretty sure that was the point…

So he said, “You both know you’re not getting out of the rest of dinner, right? If you keep letting it sit, it’s going to go cold.”

Shuichi scoffed, rubbing his forehead on Kaito’s shoulder a little before straightening up, looking down at his plate… “Okay, but you have to bring us desserts. I’m offended you didn’t get desserts the first time you both went down there.”

“I did bring desserts! That’s the dessert!”

“A single cookie is a ‘snack’ Kaito.”

Either Tim wouldn’t believe it at all, or he’d believe it immediately. Kokichi still couldn’t quite get a beat on the shortcuts his nephew’s mind made sometimes, or the girls’ either for that matter. But...they always did their best to explain before, and they’d try again now, even if...no one knew how this had happened. Hopefully, ‘they’re still investigating’ would be a satisfactory answer for the time being. 

Sighing, Kokichi scooted back to his food, still delicious even not piping hot. He’d never seen a food shortage in his life. But...all the same he was thankful for every meal. 

Kokichi smirked. “I knoooooow, but Kai-chan didn’t let me grab more than one… At least these are s’more cookies! They have marshmallows inside! We can see if there are any leftovers later, Shuu-chan.”

Kaito pouted a little at this before mumbling, “They’re big cookies…” but honestly, he was pleased the two of them seemed relatively okay. He guessed they’d go get more cookies later. Maybe bring some up for Tim…

-

“I’m gonna fight her!”

“I’d rather you didn’t.”

Kimiko didn’t say anything, playing with a lily pad with the tip of her toes, the three hanging around a fairly small pond, just on the other side of one of the castle walls. Thankfully it was a nice day out, as the three liked to come here whenever they wanted to be alone. No one else ever came here, not that they had ever seen. It felt like a secret, private place.

Tim was laying back, looking at the clouds pass over the sky, while Cali was still stomping around the grass, fuming. They had all just come from her house. They had decided it was best to not stay.

“I can’t believe her! She’s the worst! I hate her! I hope she accidentally poisons herself on those shitty meatloafs she keeps trying to make!”

“Hopefully not. It’d be bad if it spread here.” Tim said simply, blinking lazily at the sky.

Cali paused, before looking a little flustered, “Oh, that’s… I didn’t mean it like that…”

Tim just shrugged, and letting out another long huff of frustration, Cali went to go sit beside him on the grass, letting her own feet-- their shoes were all kicked off by the wall-- dip into the slimy pond water as she said, “I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to be.”

“She’s the worst and so am I.”

“Nah.”

“...I don’t think it’s a good thing… she shouldn’t have said it.”

“I don’t think she realized we were there.”

“Doesn’t matter! She shouldn’t even think it!”

“I don’t really care. Thinking anything doesn’t change anything. She can just be sad and bitter in her own head. Doesn’t affect me in any way.” Tim said, still blinking up at the sky.

“...Why did she say that?” Kimiko asked quietly.

“She doesn’t like Luminaries.”

“Yeah, but… but it’s still people… my mom says that sometimes bad things happen to people and that’s just that. That… that it’s not about being fair or… earning it or anything. That sometimes just bad things happen.”

“That’s probably true.” Tim accepted. “It feels true.”

Kimiko nodded… though she confessed, “It didn’t make me feel any better to hear it. I think it should be fair. That people should have to earn bad things happening to them. It shouldn’t just happen randomly. It should be fair...”

“That’s probably true too.” Tim agreed.

“...is your mom okay?”

“My dad thinks so. My uncle doesn’t. He didn’t say so. I can just tell.”

“Oh… are you okay?”

“... I don’t know.” Tim shrugged, perfectly content to continue looking at the sky. “We’ll see, I guess.”

“...okay.” Cali said quietly, leaning back to lay in the grass with him, Kimiko joining soon after.

-

Kokichi had meant to talk to Kaito, wanted to give them plenty of time to start planning and working on Shuuichi’s birthday...and he still wanted to. It really felt like something fun they could do as a family. But...at least for the first day after they got the news from Luminary, Kokichi...couldn’t bring himself to bring it up. 

So he’d gone to Ikuo instead. 

Shuuichi’s birthday was in just under three weeks, he’d found--after Maki, he’d caved and looked it up. His dad was already hiding a four-book set of mystery novels that Kokichi had bought, a card Kokichi had drawn of Shuuichi smugly standing over a completed puzzle of the number “25” tucked in under the ribbons holding them together. And they spent time talking about the scavenger hunt. Each riddle or clue leading to a well-known area of the castle until it all led back to their room, where, if Shuuichi had been feeling up to actually walking around, they would’ve filled the room with some decorations and cake and brought his special menu dinner up and brought out the presents and...they could just have a nice evening together. If Shuuichi wasn’t feeling up to walking around, then...they could still figure out another way to do it. 

“I still don’t know how hard I wanna make the clues,” Kokichi hummed, pen hovering over his journal page while he swung his legs off the chair he’d gotten comfortable in, Ikuo opposite and sewing up an incredibly soft fox doll Kokichi had asked for. He hoped his friend would be up for it, but Kokichi remembered the family plushes Temp had talked to him about. The fox was a deep black, and Ikuo was sewing embedded patches (so the edges wouldn’t scrape along soft baby skin) to look like the creature’s skeleton. 

“Shuu’chi’s a smar’ cookie, y’a knaw,” Ikuo reasoned. “Competitive too. Bet ‘e’d like a challenge.”

Kokichi smiled, looking at his page. “He would… Let’s hope I’m clever enough to come up with clues that would make him pause, then. I know Kai-chan’ll be able to vet them well too.”

The older man grunted, getting a good feeling that Kokichi would actually get around to telling Kaito, and wasn’t stepping around him as much as he could. The kids were doing alright.

-

Five people stood around the phone, which was projecting it’s sound and receiver to the whole room. Makoto gave a small, nervous sigh to himself, centering himself for… probably the most important conversation of his life. Phew…

Next to him, primarily as a personal bodyguard to him, partially as a trusted observer meant to report back to the other revolutionaries what happened in the room, was Tenko, who was under strict orders not to say anything during the phone call. She was devout revolutionary and extremely capable in anything tasked to her… besides talking to people. Anyone. Friend or foe. She was not good at it. Makoto had made her swear on her masters name to not say a word, and she had, reluctantly, agreed.

Across from them, on the other side of the phone, was a disgruntled older woman, who was also there as a trusted observer, but Miss Pumpkin was a representative of the farmers that had owned the farms that the revolutionaries had, uh… ‘comandered’. Makoto couldn’t get her to swear not to interject, but she had promised ‘not to run her mouth less there was a destination to be running to’... which he hoped meant she’d be reserved.

The fourth person was, again, another observer, though Makoto knew he’d need no swearing to know to keep his mouth shut. He didn’t actually know this large and stoic man’s name, though he knew to call him Shades, and that he was there to witness this event in the name of the Kuzuryu family, who had been indispensable allies throughout this… if still somewhat terrifying to work directly with.

The fifth person stood a bit of a ways away from everyone, resting on the wall, the only person in the room who’s eyes weren’t trained on the phone. Maki kept her blood red eyes instead on the door that, presumably, was still being guarded from the outside by their own people… but if there was an attack during the call, Maki wanted to be ready. 

Makoto smiled, both to calm his own nerves and hoping it’d come across in his voice, a gentle start to the conversation as he said, “Your excellency, my name is… my name is Makoto Naegi. It is a privilege to finally be able to speak to you.”

Tenko looked visibly offended at this, bristling and hissing between her teeth, but Makoto just put up a hand to her reassuringly. Rudeness would not move this conversation along. Negotiations, at least in his own mind, required a little formality.

Maki was curious what tone Byakuya was going to come into this with… and wondered if she should have been surprised when it as Kaede who spoke up, incredibly cheerfully, “Makoto! The privilege is all of ours! On the meeting we have here myself, King Byakuya, Head Secretary Shard, and Miss Taigen, head of the Taigen Steel Mill and Mineral Corporation.”

Makoto’s eyes widened… before he sighed. “Do we? Then, first, let me say before we go any further, Head Secretary Shard, Miss Taigen… my sincerest condolences on Monique, Rawr, Lady Bailsong and Young Master Saber.”

“...Makoto Naegi, as in Komaru Naegi?” Miss Taigen asked.

“Yes.” Makoto answered softly.

“My condolences as well.” the woman said, Makoto smiling slightly at that. No doubt, he and this woman were enemies in every way that mattered… but what a strange, tragic thing to have in common.

“We’re getting distracted.” Maki said, “There’s no benefit to dragging this out. We should discuss the terms of your surrender, Byakuya.”

Makoto flustered a bit, giving the assassin a worried look as he said, “Maki, please-”

“Ah, there she is.” Byakuya finally said from the other side of the receiver. “I wondered how long it’d take you to speak out of turn.”

“You took too long to get this phone line set up. We’ve wasted three days and the clock is ticking. We might as well not waste even more time on worthless pleasantries.”

“It boggles my mind, that in the same breath, you can acknowledge that you were dependent on me to set up this infrastructure, and can still criticize my competence-”

“Princess Kaede, I’m certain you’ve already gone over with Byakuya the terms you and Makoto have discussed?” Maki asked, as Makoto just sighed. Honestly, Maki’s controlling tendencies were not the easiest thing to handle, sometimes… but admittedly, he was glad as Kaede answered immediately, the conversation now back on track.

“We have… obviously, I am of course, conflicted. As a member of family, I want only the best for my cousin… but he’s proven dangerously incomepent in the art of leading our fine, beautiful kingdom. So with a heavy heart, the terms of surrender are-”

“Maki.” Byakuya suddenly growled through the phone, interrupting her, “I am not the problem here. Killing me and giving Kaede the crown isn’t going to magically solve all of Luminary’s problems. My decisions are hard, but I made them with purpose. You are not possessing all the facts-”

“You were going to expand the Indentured Program.” Maki said simply, eyes still trained on the door.

“Yes, but for good reason. And it wouldn’t have been like it was under my father and grandfather. I had plans-”

“Live with all your dreams unrealized.” Maki said simply, thinking of Kokichi as she said it. It wasn’t what she really wanted to say. What she wanted to say felt crueler, colder… but she had a feeling Kokichi might approve of that one. The Dicean Prince had been on her mind a lot, lately. An imaginary, annoying, judging, needling voice over her shoulder.

“...You never forget, that before I treated you like an Indentured, I tried to treat you like an equal. “ Byakuya growled. “Maki Harukawa, as your king and the highest in your chain of command, I order you to subdue everyone in that room with you, in my name.”

There was a brief, serious amount of alarm. Tenko leapt up from her seat, stepping in between Maki and Makoto, hands out like knives, a serious, alarmed expression on her face. Shade, as well, stiffened, putting his hand against the hilt of his saber on his hip. Maki wasn’t an indentured anymore, but there were more than a few rumors that when it came to commands, that almost never mattered…

“...I’m not something that can be controlled, Byakuya.” Maki said, something soft in her tone. Something… distant, in the far back of her mind, barely flexing to shake off the pull of the conditioning, before settling back into sleep. “The fact that you still haven't realized this is why I could never trust you to keep your title. I know you think that your Indentured Program system would be different. You are wrong. You are too dependent on conditioning to ever truly change it.”

“...Maki, pleas-”

“Princess Kaede? Please, we need to get back on track. The terms of the surrender?” Makoto interrupted, sighing in relief as Maki managed to keep her facilities. In a different timeline, that could have gone… poorly.

“In exchange for the immediate surrender of the farms and the safe relinquishing of its crops to the Luminary Capital, The Momota Family is ready to offer an official title on the Head Momota’s advisory counsel chosen by the Revolutionary Leadership-”

“Two positions, Princess Kaede.” Makoto said softly, wincing as already the princess was trying to slip things through. Maki’s eyes narrowed at this as well, though she said nothing.

“Forgive me, I was getting to that. One advisor, chosen by the revolution on the advisory counsel, meant to be an advisor on humanity relations and another spot on the advisory counsel, but one that is at an equal level with the Head Secretary position, with the title Head Societal Secretary. The criteria for the distinction between these two positions needs to be hammered out a little more, but for the now, The Head Secretary is the head of the educated Secretarial force, brought into their position under the personal choice of the current Head of the Momota family, and the Head Societal Secretary will be a position that will be filled by a ‘good faith’ vote by the leaders of the various districts, and is meant to primarily represent the voice of the commoners, and can be replaced on a similar ‘bad faith’ vote.”

“My… that idea certainly sounds familiar. Wonder who suggested that one.” Byakuya muttered.

“I was inspired by Dicean practices.” Kaede lied easily, as again, Maki just frowned.

“Furthermore, the Head of the Royal family will swear to, within a timely manner, dispand the Indentured Program entirely, and will offer full pardons to everyone who participated in the revolution. In turn, Queen Marigold will denounce her right to the throne, and within a period of three years it will be accessed if her expected son, Prince Theor, will also take the ritual denouncing his claim. And, again, with heavy heart, it has been decided that King Byakuya for his crimes against Luminary, not in small part due to the murder of the previous King and Queen of Luminary, he will in no shorter time than two weeks, be exec-”

“He’ll be exiled from Luminary.”

Everyone in the room looked at shock at Maki, whose expression didn’t change at all. Still watching the door, though after a moment, she glanced at Makoto. “What? You were the one who's been fussing and hemming and hawing this whole time, wondering if it was right or not. I’ve reconsidered your argument… I agree with you.”

Makoto blinked at her, a little stupefied, though he straightened up as Kaede, voice sounding a little… tight, “Byakuya’s crimes are serious, and great. He’s guilty of not only regicide, but matricide and patricide, not to mention multiple crimes against humanity-”

“Our… our thought process is that what we’ve been fighting for? All of this?” Makoto finally spoke up. Setting his jaw and balling his fists, “It’s the start of a new era. A new way of doing things, in Luminary. A system of freedom, and… and safety. Of compassion, for ourselves and for others… we’ve been in debate for a long time, of how much bloodshed we can spill, in the name of peace, before we become just worthy of fighting as the violence we are inciting against… and I won’t claim we entirely succeeded. People have died by my peoples hands. They’ve died on my orders. We’ve violently taken from them the safety and livelihoods of, honestly, more people than I realized works at an individual farm, and among these negotiations, Princess Kaede, we have to talk about fair compensation for the farms we’ve destroyed and the lives we’ve taken into custody these last few months-” Makoto glanced at Miss Pumpkin, who while still wanting to hear the details of the compensation, stiffly nodded, pleased that it had finally been brought up, “- and then on top of all that, we’ve had to… potentially put at risk… thousands of innocent lives, in the name of our revolution. Of the peace and freedom we desire.”

“We… we can… but we shouldn’t start that new age on an execution. We ask that King Byakuya, along with Queen Marigold, be made to denounce their claim to the throne, and then exiled out of Luminary.” Makoto said, his shoulders relaxing. Feeling like… that had been right. A relief on his shoulders.

“...” Kaede made a small, displeased sound, but when she next spoke, her voice was calm and happy, “I, personally, think that’s a very wise and merciful choice, Makoto. King Byakuya? In the name of, for once, doing right by our kingdom, feeding it in it’s greatest time of crisis, will you agree to the terms?”

There was silence for a bit...before Byakuya sighed. “I suppose I should be grateful. Maybe one day I will be. I agree to these terms. I will take myself and my family to Novoselic. Bring myself to the mercy of our cousins in the south. Congratulations… your ‘villain’ is defeated.”

“Your denouncement and start of exile will be in three days. That should be enough time to prepare.” Maki said simply, ignoring all sounds of interruption from the other end of the phone as she pushed off the wall, going over to Makoto as she said softly to him, “There’s something important I need to talk to Queen Apparent Kaede about. I wish you to stay in order to confirm I mean no betrayal to the revolution, but everyone else needs to go.”

“What? I am his bodyguard, you’re not making me go anywh-” Tenko started to squawk, but flustered and squeeked in alarm as Maki shot her a look that wasn’t quite murder… but promised that she was on the verge of it.

Makoto gave Maki a concerned look… but he knew that, barring a few other key members of the revolution, (up to and including King Aiichi, negotiations and reserves that had been being secretly collected from Dicea for months now literally the only reasons Makoto had been able to swallow his tongue and support Maki and her threats to kill off the capital, though it was a closely guarded secret between a few of the revolutionaries, some noble members, and the Kuzuryu family), no one had more influence on this outcome than Maki herself. Terror and respect for her had kept the revolution, especially in these last few days, in line and on the same page, during a massive crisis that had almost broken several revolutionaries resolve, too many people with family connections in the capital to be truly impartial. 

Quietly asking the rest of their group to leave them in private, Kaede did the same with her own group, though undoubtedly she also had someone listening in. The rest of the conversation went… shocking quick.

“Maki… we did it. You did it.” Kaede started, when everyone was clear,ed, adoration clear in her voice as she said softly, “I knew you could. I’m so proud of yo-”

“You’re making an announcement shutting down the Indentured Program the day you become queen, in three days time.”

“...Maki, of course I’ll announce it, but it’ll take time to-”

“You’ll announce it with the same fanfair and widespread information as Kaito’s marriage announcement, the end of the war, the coronation, and Byakuya’s denouncement will be met with. More. You will make pamphlets, speeches, articles front page on the newspaper, not that you are Queen, but that the Indentured Program is ending. You will send notices to every other allied country. There will be no question that the Indentured Program is ending in anyone’s minds. It will be a certainty. You will announce a final date that it will be fully dismantled by. It will be one full month from the day you announce it. The date will be just as publicly broadcasted.”

“... Maki a month is an unreasonable amount of time-”

“Six months from the day you announce it-- six months from the day you become queen-- you will have successfully transitioned all Indentured’s into civilian lives, including independent living and jobs with more than reasonable wages. The orphanages will all be highly regulated, and traded over to the Temples for initial management. All Indentured’ debts will be automatically forgiven.”

“Maki, this will all take time. Six months is too short to-”

“Twelve months from the date you announced the end of the indentured program, a holiday will be announced, a day of memorial, for all lives affected by the Indentured Program. The holiday will place an emphasis on remembering the suffering Indentured’s went through, while also celebrating the contributions they made in their time to Luminary development. Both apology and admiration for my people. It will be Kingdom wide, well funded, and tasteful. It will repeat every year.”

“I… yes, I love that idea, but Maki, why are you talking to me like this-”

“In three days, I’m going one of two directions. West or east. If I go east, I’m going home to my family, and hopefully it’ll be years before you see me again. If I go west, you will die, Kaede. If I go west, I may die. The treaty and terms being established today may fall apart. Countless lives may be ruined, including the lives of people I love and hold dear to me. All of that may happen. But one thing that will happen, if I go west, is that you will die.”

“...”

“Every timeline and deadline I put in front of you will determine if I remain east. If you fail to meet any of them? I’m coming west. You know that is not an idle threat. You were counting on that, once upon a time…”

“...Why the lack of faith in me, Maki… I’ve followed through on my side of everything. I have not betrayed you.”

“You used my name to recruit the most vulnerable members of my family, without my knowledge, or thiers. You assured them I was with them. That I was looking over them. They died, too many of them, died believing I sent them on missions I knew nothing about… suicide missions, based on their faith in me. They were caught, tortured and killed, with no backup coming, believing I had endorsed their deaths… and you did nothing to save them.” Maki still stared at the door. The phone wasn’t anyone. The phone was just a transmitter… but it felt like Kaede was in the room with her, as Maki said, some sadness deep in her gut, “You’ve betrayed my trust in the most blatant way I can think of. And I still made you Queen… but now you’re a queen that does not have my trust. Who owes her kingdom to a revolution that respects me. Now you are a queen that needs to deal with the power system she herself has put into place… you don’t have the same luxury your Uncle or family line has enjoyed up till now. You are accountable to someone. You’re accountable to me… and if you fuck up?”

“I’m going west.” Maki said. “And there will be nothing anyone can do to stop me.”

-

“And streeeeeeeeetch your arms back down to your feet!”

From a personal perspective, it actually looked kind of fun. A good workout. For her nephew?

“Shift your weight forward as you walk your feet back!”

They had stopped for a week at Kokichi’s behest. He told Dr. Cedar he hadn’t been feeling very steady and didn’t feel safe doing the bikram exercises until he steadied. Honestly, Nazumi didn’t think Kokichi had looked steady for a while now. And she had told him, and...he had gotten so hopeful. And Nazumi hadn’t had the heart to push anymore. 

“Raise your left leg into the sky!”

Against Kokichi, at least. She had watched the doctor poke all manner of objects against Kokichi, use odd-smelling oils and strange creams, even fill his belly-button with a powder that she set on fire. Nazumi had gotten close to getting into a fight with this woman dozens of times...but every treatment was harmless. Nothing stung or burned or ached and...after Nazumi had tried it out, Kokichi had chosen to go through with it. 

“Place it back down, and raise your right leg!”

So, she’d gone to Seiko. And while she didn’t seem to trust Cedar...she couldn’t prove that anything she was doing was hurting Kokichi. And Kokichi was choosing to continue. So instead, Nazumi got supplements and snack advice and...anything she could get from Seiko that would maybe make this easier on Kokichi. And those, at least, seemed to work. 

“Leg down, shift your weight back in a stretch before lowering into a plank!”

...Kokichi was panting a little, red in his cheeks, sweating up a storm...but so was Nazumi, minus the panting. The yoga room they were in was hot. But they’d just taken a break, and, by past sessions, Kokichi should be alright for a few more repetitions until Nazumi called for them to stop. His limbs were shaking from being used, just slightly, not from exhaustion yet, and he’d just downed one of his water bottles. 

“Push your torso up, stretch your lower back!”

As fun as something like this might look to be in her free time, Nazumi stood just off to the side of her nephew, eyes trained on his form. Which had helped when he was learning the poses, since she caught once that he was about to lean into twisting his knee, which was a lucky save, but once they started doing it in the hot room, it was to tell when he had had enough. Because if left to her own devices, Cedar would just have him do the full reps. 

“Back into plank, then lift your hips back up!”

...Nazumi wondered if she was missing something. Cedar didn’t seem like she was cruel, and the few other patients--or clients--that Nazumi had spoken to seemed pleased with their treatments. But...it tended to be things like a stiff shoulder or mild acne...not like organ failure. Sometimes she felt a little bad for weighing everything the older woman said, but-

Nazumi’s eyes widened, and she surged forward without thinking. Usually something incredibly dangerous for her, something she’d had extensive therapy to prevent, but…

Lifting his leg in downward-dog, Kokichi’s panting breaths had caught, his entire body trembling as he started to fall...right into Nazumi’s arms. And it wasn’t a second before she brought him out of the hot room...and not one more before she was sprinting out of the studio, headed for...the castle was too far away. Seiko’s clinic. 

-

It was Tomomi this time, sprinting up to the princes’ room, her heels in hand as she wasted no time running, banging on the door.

“Kokichi’s had a heart attack!!”

Kaito was, in the span of a few seconds, furious about many different things. 

The most urgent thing was, fuck, fuck, he had to get to Kokichi.

The second thing was watching the startled, terrified look in his extremely pregnant boyfriend grow and widen in his eyes, Shuichi in his moment of fear immediately looking to Kaito-

Kaito opened the door and grabbed Tomomi’s wrist mid-knock, growling between his fucking teeth, “Cut that shit out, that’s not how you send word.”

Letting go of her wrist, Kaito said, eyes still furious, “Where is he being treated? Down at the medical floor?”

Maybe if she had been in a different state of mind she would’ve done something different, but Tomomi’s eyes were wide with worry and fear as she just let Kaito grab her wrist. Shaking her head, she tried to get it all out quickly. “He was at a session with that new doctor--Nazumi took him to Dr. Kimura’s pharmacy. It’s been, I don’t… Eight minutes?”

They were still getting regular updates about Luminary, but thankfully this call had gotten in. Ryouhei had immediately sent her to find and tell Kaito and Shuuichi, while Takashi had been sent to the med ward to...figure out what to do? She didn’t know?! But Kokichi...he couldn’t be moved while he was in the middle of an emergency like this, right? It was usually hours before the healers backed off of him. Dr. Kimura was Kokichi’s personal healer and was a miracle worker but...would she be able to help him alone? In her pharmacy?

“Kaito.”

It wasn’t any specific request, though Kaito could hear what Shuichi, in his moment of increasing fear, his voice coming in in tighter, frightened, shallow breaths… make this stop. Make this better. FIx this.

“Tomomi, please sit with Shuichi for a bit, he may need to be laid out on his side in a few minutes.” Kaito said, eyes dilated, thinking fast, “Shuichi, I’m going to find Hajime or someone strong enough to lend you an arm and you’re going to meet us at the pharmacy. Don’t hurry…” Kaito looked back at Shuichi, who was starting to have white spots on his cheeks and Kaito rushed over to him, grabbing his hat from the desk and putting it onto his head, lowering it over his eyes as he said to him, “Don’t hurry, but I’m not leaving you behind, okay? I’m sending help to bring you down, but take your time, you rushing and losing your breath won’t help him. Everything’s going to be okay. I’m going ahead to take care of him, you’ll meet us there. Okay?”

Shuichi was trying to catch his breath, a small, desperate whine coming from his throat… but he nodded. Then nodded again, before returning to his breathing.

Kaito headed back to Tomomi, “Please, watch him. I’m sending someone up to help. When they show up, please, if no one else has managed to do it yet, go to the medward and tell them about both Kokichi and Shuichi’s conditions. Shuichi is having a panic attack. He’s usually fine but it causes shortness of breath. Let them know. Can I trust you with that?”

If it were possible, even more panic filled Tomomi’s ice-blue eyes, looking over to Shuuichi with some amount of guilt, but she gave Kaito a nod. “I can do that. I-I’m sorry, we just…” She let out a breath and shook her head. “Get to Kokichi alright, I’ll pass on the messages.”

Dropping her shoes out of the way of the door, Tomomi came to Shuuichi’s side, sitting with him. “I’m sorry for scaring you. I will not leave your side until we can get you to Kokichi, alright?”

“Don’t touch him unless he seems like he’s calming down or you need to help him onto his side, it might make it worse. Same with talking to him, wait until he can start talking himself. I’m sending help, it won’t be long.” Kaito assured them both, before finally bolting down the stairs.

Hajime, Katsuki, Ikou (not Ikou, Ikou needs to go to Kokichi), Lake, Chako (no, Chako’s too small, she won’t be good to carry some of his weight.), Denji (they have biceps, but also might be too small), Waku (Too small) someone, someone he could count on, someone he can trust-

Katsuki has this weird habit of just showing up sometimes, and before Kaito had even gotten down one floor of stairs, she was there.

Kaito, relieved, quickly explained the situation and asked for her help, and he was equally relieved when she didn’t just immediately disappear on him as fast she appeared, refusing his request. Katsuki could be trusted to do what she said she would, but Kaito knew he couldn’t always trust her to… well, say she would do something. But she was on board this time. 

Then, as he got to the gate, he talked to one of the guards, and asked them, since they were still on shift for another few hours, when Haneda and Tim-- nine year old red head with a scar on his face, the nanny will absolutely be wearing some sort of face mask-- come to the castle, please pull Haneda to the side and inform her that Kokichi is having a medical emergency and that his family will be at the pharmacy handling it, ask Haneda to stay with Tim until one of them can check in tonight. 

After that, it was a bee-line to the pharmacy.

The pharmacy was closed, but as Kaito came close there was a young person that came out, sunglasses tucked into what strangely for the weather looked like a winter hat. The expression on their face was tense as they looked Kaito up and down. “Prince Kaito? Dr. Seiko said if it was you, you could come in,” and she also had quickly muttered, as she was already focusing on saving their heir apparent’s life holy shit that he could have an explosive temper when it came to his husband’s safety, so Keigo opened the door for the tall, built red-headed man while he talked. 

Though, he did take a glance behind Prince Kaito, looking a little befuddled. “...should I be on watch for Mr. Saihara as well? Or any other family members? We closed up the store, but Dr. Seiko had me on watch for you…”

Kaito immediately started stepping in, really just… wanting to see his husband. 

Calm down, keep thinking, think through your anger, “Our partner Shuichi and a guardsman named Katsuki are on their way, but he’s pregnant and he might be a little slow. Please--” Kaito was going to say ‘keep an eye out’ but this person might be assisting Seiko, “--at the very latest, leave the door unlocked for them? I don’t want him to be locked out, thank you.”

Kaito thought about asking him where Kokichi was being treated, but honestly, he had been in and out of Seiko’s pharmacy so often that he had a pretty damn good idea of where they would be, so he headed to the back, going past the curtain.

Keigo nodded, affirming that he’d understood before going back to the window. He’d only been given a description of Shuuichi, but the man was more than distinctive enough that if there was someone with him, then it would be easy to assume it was this Katsuki. Seiko had said he could leave once the prince’s family had arrived, but...it didn’t feel right. He wasn’t involved in the medicine side of the business, but he was still a part of the pharmacy, and if the Ouma family needed privacy for this, then he’d use his only applicable skill and damn well make certain they had that privacy. 

Kaito had barely made it into the back room when Nazumi’s head snapped over to him, holding up a stern, placating hand. She tried to beckon him over to the side where she had been standing, out of the way of the flurry of activity around the examination bed, Seiko and her assistant quickly and carefully tending to the prince as the heart monitor on the wall fluctuated. 

“I know you’re worried, but they’re tryin’ to stabilize him. Seiko’ll let you know when you can get close, alright?” For someone usually so cheery and relaxed, there was a certain rigid intensity to Nazumi, each little bit of herself held taut like she was still waiting to jump into action. 

Kaito’s… face fell.

...Not again…

As Kaito followed Nazumi to the wall, his eyes fell on Seiko and...one? One other person? Were none of the castle healers coming to assist!? Someone before Tomomi had to have sent word by now!?

...his husband, his husband, ‘Kichi??

Kaito had known there wasn’t going to be much he could actually do when he got here. It had just been important to him to get here. To look after him. But being here…

He was so small, he was so small. Why did this keep happening to him??

...why?

“What happened?” Kaito asked quietly. Every muscle in his back rock solid.

Nazumi’s nose flared but otherwise her expression was stoic, looking over at her tiny, young nephew. “They were having anotha yoga day. The last bit… He’d just had a break. Said he was feelin alright. He could lift a hand without it shaking, eyes could follow my hand smoothly...had a snack an’ a whole water bottle. It was the first set and he just…” Her hand tightened around her bicep. “He just fell. Here was closer than the castle, so I ran ‘im over.”

There was a bit of a commotion at the front of the shop before Keigo popped his head in. “Hansuke, two healers from the castle are here; they brought supplies. Can I let them in the back?”

The man assisting Seiko locked eyes with her for a moment, and at her nod, he called back. “Enter the healing domain and lend your aid!”

Not even that, easy enough to hear from behind Keigo, was enough to even provoke a weird expression from Nell as she bustled in, setting her bag of supplies on an unused tray table before going over to wash her hands and glove up, the red-haired doctor behind her following quickly in her footsteps. 

Kaito gave the assistant… an increasingly concerned look, but was still immensely relieved to see assistance had arrived. Good. Good. The more assistance Seiko had, the better. Kaito trusted Seiko. She was his sidekick. He could count on her. 

… something was missing here.

“...if Dr. Cedar was with you all when it happened, why isn’t she here assisting??”

Nazumi narrowed her eyes. It made sense at first, but now? After she had had time to call the castle, and for them to get word out to Kaito--and presumably Shuuichi, Aiichi, and Ikuo--and to the castle healers, and for them to collect supplies and arrive?

“I pulled ‘Kich’ outta the room ‘mmediately, an’ didn’ linger before runnin’ over...but I dun’no why she ain’t here now.”

Nazumi’s weight shifted, but her feet never lifted from the ground as Seiko’s muttering was just barely audible over the machinery, delegating tasks to the other healers. “...bein’ with Kokichi is more important. But if she don’t show her face within the hour…”

...it wouldn’t be a good idea for Nazumi to see the woman right now.

“...” Kaito didn’t know what to say to that. But he did, after a moment, feeling almost guilty about it-- it felt wrong to not be furious right now-- as he pulled out his stone and polishing cloth, starting to mindlessly work it around the stone, having… a difficult time looking at Kokichi on the table, but unwilling to look away. 

He looked so fucking small… and thin. Like skin around bone… Kaito could have found something attractive in Kokichi’s skeletal frame this morning, or last night. But right now? His stomach turned with nausea at the sight of him. He was too thin…

“...yoga…” Kaito gave Nazumi a furrowed look, “...I thought Kokichi wasn’t doing that hot yoga stuff anymore. He weighs fucking eighty-nine pounds right now soaking wet, why was he still doing weight loss excercices?”

He wasn’t accusing Nazumi of anything. He was just... angry and trying to understand. And Nazumi was the only person around to ask.

“They weren’t,” Nazumi tersely said. “Kokichi told Seiko he wasn’t feelin’ well, and she said they should stop. This session, Cedar asked if he was feelin’ up to it, an’ Kokichi agreed so…”

Nazumi’s words trailed off as she took in Kaito’s words, before she turned to him with narrowed eyes. “Weight loss exercises? Cedar said the yoga was for breathin’ improvement.”

“...fuck, I don’t know, I’m not a god damn doctor.” Kaito hissed, closing his eyes, gritting his teeth-- though, that thought quickly led to, please, please, Atua who loves me, who loves my husband, please don’t take him yet, you can’t, you can’t, Kaito promised eighty, Miyako needs her daddy-- “I’ve only ever seen people trying to lose water weight doing steam based exercise routines. Wrestlers trying to get into their weight grade for tournaments and heavier folks, or just folks with big events coming up, trying to shave a few more pounds off quicker. Steam exercise was always about weightloss, in the fitness regimes I saw growing up… I never heard shit about it being for breathing…”

Nazumi looked like she was trying to follow Kaito’s words, fitting it in with what she saw in the sessions...and what the regimen sheet said. What Seiko’s advice implied… The woman closed her eyes for a moment, almost like she was pinning points together. When she opened them, they were focused on a solution only she could see, the darkened strata of her irises almost like an x...x marks the spot. 

“...doing stretches in warm rooms can be helpful for people with breathin’ issues. Cold air can sometimes make ya feel out of breath, ya know? But if all you’re doin’ is slow? Then it ain’t really too much exercise at all, just warmin’ ya up and keepin’ ya loose fer stretchin’.”

“That’s all the written bits Cedar put down imply. But that’s not what they do in the studio. It’s hot an’ humid and Cedar’s always tryin’ ta speed Kokichi up into doin’ it in a workout. Seiko’s advice still helps, but...fer someone who would actually be put at risk by that sort of exercise…” Nazumi’s eyes flicked up to her nephew, a terrible sort of guilt dawning in her sunrise-colored eyes, “...it’s not enough. Nothin’ would be enough for somethin’ like that…”

“... Kokichi talked sometimes like he didn’t want to keep doing it.” Kaito said softly to her. He didn’t like how much everyone was touching him, right now. He knew that was irrational. That the possessive, anger inside of him was him being so fucking stupid. They were trying to help Kokichi… but Kaito hated it. He hated it. Kokichi didn’t like being touched and moved around and pinned down by people. He wanted to rip Kokichi away from them and put a blanket around him and hide him in their room until everything was better. He hated this. 

“...I’d always chastise him. Tell him he needed to keep going. Trust the doctors. I told him we were aiming for eighty, but he had to put the work in…” Kaito stared at his husband, entirely limp on the table, before covering his face, gritting his teeth until he felt like they’d crack, too angry to cry but still this close, “I’m so fucking stupid. I’m so fucking stupid… I’ve been seeing signs of this coming for weeks and I just didn’t know what to do...”

Nazumi glanced to Kaito once before looking back at Kokichi. Always so eager to please, willing to...to kill himself in the thought that it might make things better for other people. He had been getting so much better…

“...it’s really hard to say no if you’re already there… I’d always ask him if he was okay with somethin’ always tried to try somethin’ out first… Never hurt but...I mean...I could probably tell that it didn’t mean anything, or...whatever… He always said yes, ‘cept for when she was gonna mess with his neck…”

Something almost like a growl rumbled in Nazumi’s chest before she clenched her jaw, watching her nephew. 

...her nephew that gasped. And the heart monitor started to even out. 

Kaito realized, all at once, that he didn’t actually know what he would do if Kokichi died.

Not as a testament of his anger. Or even his despair. He just… literally couldn’t see a future where that happened. Just a long, empty abyss of possibility. Just nothing. No future with Shuichi. No raising Miyako. No seeing Maki again someday. If Kokichi died right now? The world wouldn’t go on. Everything would stop. End. Over.

And the most terrifying thought was that it wouldn’t, and Kaito would have to deal with the first hour of his life where Kokichi wasn't here anymore.

There was a moment, where Kaito heard a pause in the machine, just a beat, and the sheer scope of his helplessness really hit him, in that moment. How little he could do. Kokichi needed him and there was nothing he could do…

And Kaito collapsed on his knees, not having realized every muscle in his god damn body was starting to seize up in how rigid he was, until that beat followed into a beep… beat… beep…

Oh fuck oh fuck thank you, thank you, Atua, please…

Shakily, Kaito quickly got back up, wanting to be able to see the table easier. His ‘Kichi’s chest was, ever so slowly, rising and falling by itself again. Fuck… fuck… thank you… please…

Kaito’s wide, frightened eyes looked around at the healers, noting they were moving with a little less urgency now. “...w-what’s happening?” he dared ask. Hoping he wasn’t distracting them, but wanting to know if he was going to be okay…

Nazumi had gone entirely still as Kaito dropped to the ground, their utter relief showing in different ways, though they both shook it off soon enough, Nazumi lending a hand to the young man. And while she was curious too…

Seiko finally looked up at their little audience for the first time since Nazumi had brought Kokichi in, giving a nod to the others to continue on. “He’s stabilized… K-Kaito, we can’t bring him back to the castle just yet, and I would like to request that that be a few hours so we can make sure he doesn’t relapse, or would be in danger d-during the trip, but…”

She gave him a soft look. “He’s going to be alright.”

“However,” she started, that professionalism drawing her up so much more than the meek woman Shuuichi had met all those months ago, “What were you two talking about, that Cedar’s regimens weren’t what they w-were actually doing?”

Nazumi’s eye twitched in anger, but she turned to Kaito. “I’ll explain and handle it. Kaito, go to your man. He’ll appreciate knowin’ you were there more than anywhere else right now.”

Kaito let out a shaky, relieved breath, easily accepting the help up, before quickly hurrying over to Kokichi. He got over to his husband, looking him over… before turning to the general group of healers and, putting his hands stiffly at his sides, he bowed low. “Thank you.”

He finished his bow, and immediately turned back to his husband, for a moment just… afraid to touch him… before swallowing that down and running his hands over Kokichi’s forehead, his other hand gently on his arm, as he whispered to him, “Hey, hey, ‘Kichi… it’s okay… I’m here. Shuichi’s coming. I’m sure Ikou’s on his way too. You’re okay babe… y-you’re really sweaty… I should get you a washcloth, wipe the sweat off. No good, leaving my poor husband feeling sticky and gross, huh? In a sec babe, in a sec, I’ll… I’ll get a washcloth in a second. I’m here. I’ll get you clean and we’ll p-put some food inside of you… might be from a tube, but considering we’re not feeding you sugar maybe you’ll appreciate not having to taste it…”

Kokichi didn’t so much as twitch at his touch, and Kaito knew from experience it’d be days, so he tried not to feel too heartsick at that as he whispered, “It’s okay… you c-can sleep a bit… take your time… our ‘Kichi’s had a hard day… you’ll be up before you know it. I’ll grab a washcloth in a second babe… you’re just fine… e-everything’s okay…”

Nell and that red-headed healer (what was their name?) seemed relatively nonplussed by Kaito’s bow, used to him enough by now, but Seiko’s assistant flustered for a moment, unsure what to do until he apparently decided to bow back, quickly getting out of the prince’s way. And returning shortly with a lightly damp washcloth and a dry one, grinning awkwardly at Kaito. 

When Seiko returned from her talk with Nazumi, the cool look in her eyes suggested that she had just been livid, but...it wasn’t for any of the people around her now. She traded some words with Hansuke and prompted him to head home, having done the same with Keigo, and thanked him for his help. She would likely be spending more time at the castle in the near-future, so he should be prepared to handle their regular prescription orders tomorrow, a task the young man took with oddly-phrased confidence. 

Shuuichi and Katsuki eventually made their way down to the pharmacy, though with a surprise Ikuo and Aiichi in tow, Ikuo offering his arm to Shuuichi on the side Katsuki wasn’t on and Aiichi trailing behind, at least until he opened the pharmacy door for the group. 

Kokichi...Kokichi was in darkness. There were barely any of the little watercolor blotches of “thing” in the void. But he managed to send one thing out into the ether. He didn’t quite manage to direct it at anyone in particular, not even words really coming through, but the intent of a tired, soft apology came from his weakened consciousness before it faded back into rest. 

Looks like he wouldn’t make it to club tonight…

-

It was a few hours of calming down later, and as Shuichi and Kaito sat with Kokichi, Ikou nodding off in the corner, King Aiichi… off to be king again, Kaito was long finished wiping Kokichi down and was just idly running his hands through Kokich’s hair… it was gonna get tangled again. Lots of bed head… gonna have to use lot of conditioner… lots of repair work…

...gonna have to feed him. After a few days (hopefully just a few) of a pure liquid diet? Gonna have to… to really pack it into him. Protein. Lots of healthy, healthy protein and vegetables, fruits… things his body could use… some pastries too, because a little emergency fat wouldn’t hurt… would help a lot more than his skin basically knotted around his skeleton…

...lots of repair work to do…

Hair… food… what else… what else could Kaito do…

“I thought this was supposed to make him better.” Shuichi said. One of the few things he had since he had gotten here, other than a harsh refusal at Kaito’s idea that he should go home.

“...I guess it didn’t.” Kaito murmured back. “If Dr. Cedar says him having a heart attack during one of her sessions is ‘part of the process’...”

Kaito frowned. “...Could it be?”

“If this was the plan, she needs to die.” Shuichi said simply.

Kaito tensed… “...we can’t do that. I can’t do that. Miyako needs me… you guys need me… I can’t be sent away right now…”

“She almost killed him.”

“... She might… she probably didn’t do it on purpose… Nazumi told Seiko some things about his regime. I guess they were doing things that wasn’t on the approved schedule… I think that was the most angry I’ve ever seen Seiko, though I couldn’t hear what she was saying...”

“...everyone went through the trouble of doing her background checks, approving her schedule, getting everything verified, and Nazumi couldn’t keep track of what they were supposed to be doing?”

“Shhhh, Shuichi… let’s give her more credit than that. Kokichi… I don’t think he noticed either. I got the impression it was subtle. Little things adding up...”

“Why are you defending them? Any of them? You should be just as upset as I am.”

“...I am.”

“We need to do something-”

“No.” Kaito said simply, giving Shuichi a tired… a profoundly tired look. “We can’t. I can’t, Shuichi. I won’t be taken away from you. We’re not back in Luminary. I can’t protect us here… I can’t… make people go away, or turn a blind eye. I can’t frighten them. I don’t have that power here. All I can do is take care of you when shit like this happens. That’s it… I’m sorry. I can’t.”

Shuichi… just looked away. Kaito’s stomach tightening with shame, but knowing he was right. Besides… Shuichi didn’t really mean it. He was tired, and frightened, and angry. His panic attack had taken time to calm down, and then it was a long, frightened walk to what, as far as he could know, could have been the dead father of his child. Shuichi just looked… exhausted. And wanted to lash out on someone. He’d calm down once he had a moment to rest.

“...I don’t want her to get away with this.” Shuichi said. “She didn’t even show up to help.”

“...okay.” Kaito said, running his fingers soothingly through Kokichi’s hair. “...but we have to do it the way Dicean’s do it. The way they’ll let us do it. Just… be patient, okay? Someone might beat us to it. Our job isn’t to take care of Cedar. Your job is to get through these next few months the best you can, and my job is to take care of you and Kokichi and Tim. That’s what we have to focus on… anything else is going to result in all of us getting hurt more…”

“...When do you think he’ll wake up?” Shuichi asked. Holding Kokichi’s hand.

“Oh… I’m sure any day now. Maybe even tomorrow.” Kaito lied.

-

It was evening by the time Seiko cleared Kokichi to be stable enough to go home, and she declared that she needed to stop at her home briefly first, but she would be spending the night at the castle as well, just in case anything happened. The two other healers helped pack up the things they’d brought from the castle, along with anything Kokichi would need--he’d been changed into a medical robe at some point, so his clothes were among them--and Nell said she would be setting up Kokichi’s heart monitor in their room when they got back. 

By the time Kokichi was laid out in bed, the news had spread throughout the castle, but still there wasn’t a knock for a bit. 

“Kaito?” Waku’s voice came through the door. “Did you guys eat? I brought food.”

“Please say you’re taking visitors,” Lake’s voice followed, oddly pitched at the end.

Kaito blinked with a start, not having realized he had fallen asleep at the vanity desk until the ladies voices came through the door, Kaito looking around in confusion for a moment. What was that noise…

Ah. Right. The heart monitor. 

Rubbing the sleep from his eyes, he looked at the clock- damn, how was it this late already? He had only just sat down…-- before, considering Shuchi for a moment… he’d be okay. Even off the medication, Shuichi still was a fairly sound sleeper, and yesterday and today had been exhausting… had his boyfriend eaten yet? Shit. Kaito couldn’t remember… the day was a blur of activity. Had he made Shuichi sit down to eat, or had he just thought about it? He couldn’t remember…

Opening the door, Kaito threw a grin, as exhausted as it was, onto his face, quickly putting a finger up and saying, “You guys can come in, but maybe keep your voices low? They’re both sleeping…”

Well, a coma technically counted as sleeping, right? He doubted they’d disturb Kokichi at least. 

As for food… “I really have no idea if we’ve eaten. I think someone gave us sandwiches for lunch? I’m pretty sure that was today… maybe that was last night?”

Waku headed right in, quiet as requested, setting down the tray she was carrying on the desk. It wasn’t fancy, some lightly toasted bread and a small pot of jam on the side, some lemon water, three bananas… Things that would be easy to eat and wouldn’t come up later. Not for Kokichi, obviously. 

She gave Kaito a soft look and touched his arm, trying to herd him back into a seat. “Sandwiches were for lunch today, yeah. Hasn’t been over a day.”

Meanwhile…

Lake had stopped a few steps into the room, her gaze trained on Kokichi. Her hair was up in a sloppy bun and she was just wearing a muscle tee and jeans, obviously not coming from work as the others often caught her. There was something shiny in her eyes that caught in the light from the window before she turned her head and clenched her fist. 

“Dammit. Dammit! I’m gonna murder that woman!”

Kaito smiled in appreciation at the food, that being a sort of display of affection he understood quite well. Aww… what a good friend he had. Where was he going? Why did he need to sit down? 

As Kaito took a few steps towards his herd, sitting down and giving Waku a mildly bewildered look, his brain still half asleep-- he hadn’t slept, in so many words, at the pharmacy-- before his gaze turned from Waku to Lake. Still just… mildly confused.

He blinked again. There was a small lag in his left eye. He hadn’t slept well in a while, actually. It was funny how things piled up… “That’s no good.” Kaito suddenly said, his brain not quite sparking quickly, but finally registering what Lake had actually said.

Standing back up, Kaito patted around his pants-- shit, he should change his clothes at some point-- he took out his stone and his polishing rag and, taking out the small ointment from the desk, he dabbed the cloth in-- it smelled nice. It reminded him of Kokichi. Something lavender-- before sort of staggering over to Lake, handing her the stone and the cloth and muttering, “Here. Rub the damn thing. I don’t know, it helps. You can’t kill her. It’d upset Kokichi if he woke up and you were off somewhere tending a garden. Sort of thing that’d send him right back to the medical ward.”

Lake, in the middle of her grief and anger, was dumbfounded as Kaito handed over his rock, and...she was shocked enough to start rubbing it with the cloth, her jaw set again, but...less explosive. There was a part of her that wanted to declare that she’d barely ever been there for Kokichi before, so what change would there be if she was sent off to iso now?! ...but she knew that was childish and coming from outrage and...it really did hurt her that she hadn’t been there for him more when they were growing up, and now that it was changing, she wanted to cherish it. 

Sighing, Lake let her shoulders drop as she polished the stone, Waku watching in amusement as the two like-minded jocks interacted. “...I know… I won’t actually. But...dammit. ‘Zumi told me everything. ...just a...villain, preying on hope…”

Lake grumbled, gripping the rock tight. “...she has a contract summons tomorrow. Can’t prosecute her for not coming to help ‘K, since ‘Zumi zoomed him out of there, but if Dr. K’s case is right and she was violating the contract agreement she signed with Kokichi? Oooohooo buddy. She’ll have a storm coming.”

Waku decided then that enough was enough, as entertaining as it was. “Lake, it’s the middle of the night, and Kaito’s half-asleep. We can keep them updated on this stuff tomorrow, but for now… We wanted to make sure he and Shuuichi were alright, right? And see Kokichi.”

She smiled softly at Kaito, not expecting a coherent answer, but hoping the thoughts of this would cheer him up. “Word is that Dr. Kimura and the other healers got him stabilized super fast. I think that bodes well for his recovery, don’t you think? He’ll be up and at ‘em in no time.”

Kaito could entirely sympathise with Lake’s thought process right now. Honestly, in a different place in his life? Hell, maybe even just a week ago, he’d have been… just as focused on the vengeance part of this. Hell, he felt a little guilty that he wasn’t more focused on it. Cedar couldn’t be allowed to do what she did. It was incredibly cruel, and specifically disrespectful to someone Kaito hugely valued… in his mind, this was a prime example of a situation where vengeance should be expected by all parties…

… but the world was different today, more than it had been a week ago, and Kaito sort of nodded mutely and muttered, “Was thinking of getting some picture of her or something… I don’t know, I gotta think about it more.  It can wait. Contract stuff is good too.”

But Kaito did brighten up a little at the compliment to Seiko, giving Waku an incredibly pleased look, even if it wasn’t quite as full body as it usually was. “She did great, didn’t she? She’s a good healer… she just needed a little help. Some people are amazing and just need a little help to… not be shitty. She was kinda shitty when I first met her…” Kaito blinked, before realizing he had said that out loud, and quickly corrected, “In some ways. Some ways. Life is hard. We don’t always get it right the first time, ya know? I’m really proud of her. I was right to put my faith into her. Thank god… she’s been invaluable to Shuichi and Kokichi. She made Kokichi’s medicine, did you know that? I only found that out recently. Fixed Shuichi’s pollen, made easily the most helpful thing we’ve got for Kokichi, then on top of that handled his heart attack in essentially the back of a store… Seiko’s invaluable. Perfect sidekick material…”

Kaito blinked sleepily… before looking at the sandwiches with this slightly ‘oh yeah, those exist’ expression, before saying to them, “Thanks for bringing up food, Waku, Lake. And for checking in. It means more than you probably realize.”

If they had grounds for arrest? That means there would be a case for malpractice. And if that came to be...Lake would personally make sure that everyone knew Cedar was a careless fraud. For hurting her little brother, she’d never work again. 

...but there was a lot of work to be done to get there, if that was in the future. And for what had been done to Kokichi…

Lake looked over, the anger fading out of her as she looked at her little brother. Tiny and sickly and...out for the count, bedridden for who knew how long. He had been doing better, everyone could see it...and she ruined it. Lake had no doubt Kokichi would get on the up again, but...it was just going to be more time, with more strain added to the tally on his body. 

Waku nodded at Kaito, smiling at his rambling praise. “She’s a great healer, and I’m glad you guys are in her care too. Dr. Kimura will see you through all of this just fine.” 

Seeing the sleep in his eyes, Waku nudged Lake, who handed back Kaito’s stone, as she nudged the tray a little more towards Kaito. “Eat. Even just a little. Me or Hajime or someone will be by in the morning, make sure you get breakfast. And if you need anything ever, someone will be nearby and can help you out, alright? Before we let you rest, is there anything you need?”

Was there? He had talked to Haneda earlier, though Tim… hadn’t wanted to stop by. Kaito might need to sit down with him at some point, find out what was going on in the kids head, but, well, that was just something he had to do at some point. Still, needs wise, Tim was good, Haneda being the lifesaver she usually was. Medical stuff wise, Seiko was just downstairs, being the literally lifesaver she was. Food was here, Kaito once again being saved by the women in his life, Waku coming to the rescue this time. Was there anything else…

...oh.

Kaito, very, very briefly, opened his mouth to ask how… if anyone had any word on… what day was today? Tomorrow, probably, but it still felt like yesterday… if anyone had heard any word on the… how the ceremony had gone and…

“No. Thank you guys so much again. Seriously, it means the world to me.” Kaito said, giving them both grateful grins.

Kokichi, Shuichi, Miyako and Tim were the only things that mattered right now.

Everything else would wait.

-

...he couldn’t feel much, in honesty. But there were a few things. 

For one, even if he couldn’t really see the memory of his room, Kokichi could still sense his calendar. It was Friday night, so...it was still relatively soon. He’d had his appointment in the early afternoon. He had planned to stop by a bakery and pick up a few pastries for Shuuichi on his way home. 

...it was Friday night, and his turn, and...there was no way he’d be able to create an adaptive defence right now. He couldn’t even leave his own mind. He couldn’t even see himself. 

...what happened?

Kokichi...didn’t particularly want Alter Ego to see him like this again. But he needed to tell them and Temp that...their work might be put on hold for a bit… Mustering up all he could, Kokichi...sent out a prod to his friends. About as coherent a message as he could send from afar.

Alter Ego showed up first… and in this environment? They looked… off.

There was a barest impression of a cat, that, honestly, every time they moved, walking carefully through the dark of the void, almost disappeared entirely, it’s after-image just shimmering slightly around what was, in its most basic description? Was a small, colorful spiked ball of light. Twitching and randomly jabbing out, a lively ball of light. Everytime Alter Ego stilled a little, whitelines glowed out form the spiked ball, outlining a white impression of a cat, golden eyes the only part of its body filled in properly in color.

Alter Ego’s… impression of an ear twitched slightly, golden spheres looking around. They opened their mouth to call out, and no sound came out. Hmmm…

{I am here.}

{Kokichi?}

{I’m sorry…}

The intent didn’t seem to be emanating from any place in particular. It just...was. But soon enough there was another source of light in the darkness. It didn’t branch out into an outline like Alter Ego did, but just stayed as a small ball, slightly tinged a lilac purple and...not as bright as you’d imagine a ball of pure light to be. 

Ever so gently, there was an impression of a caress around the outline of the cat, and a sigh that echoed in the darkness. 

{I wish I could give you a sunny cushion to sit on… I can’t imagine this is too comfortable…}

{I don’t think I can take my turn tonight…}

Alter Ego looked at the light in concern. He had… never been in a mind that looked like this before. He had been in damaged minds before. Kokichi’s mind when it was damaged, once, where it had been… closer to this.

But this was far, far more severe.

The outline grew brighter where the impression happened, and Alter Ego leaned into it, just… increasingly concerned.

{An image of Alter Ego, taking another piece out of their own soul, passing it onto Kokichi.}

{?}

There was a soft, weak laugh in the darkness, and that fond caress repeated. {I really think you’re one of the kindest people I’ve ever met. Please don’t give more of yourself to me, though.}

Silence, though the watercolor splotches around them had a flurry of little pats, outlining a hand and the edge of a bed. 

{...I don’t know what happened…}

{The feeling of growing more tired, weaker every day. Powering through. Feeling exhausted as a dull pain thumps in your chest, lungs feeling stuffy and suffocated. A pain shooting up an arm and then...nothing.}

{...I think I might’ve had a heart attack.}

Golden eyes and the outlines of listening ears followed the pats, and in a shimmer of afterimages, Alter Ego figured out where the… ‘bed’ was, the rules of the consciousness so weak, so barely holding together, that for a moment when the cat landed on the bedding, they felt themselves start to sink, the physicality of it unable to cope with their directly interacting with it.

But after a moment, the bed stabilized. Alter Ego tried to judge where Kokichi’s image would be, if it could sustain itself, and curled up close to it.

{A feeling of increasing concern. Fear.}

{Did Kokichi know if he was in a coma?}

{The feeling of confusion. Of never seeing a mind in this state before…}

As Alter Ego asked their questions, there was a small ripple through the room, and The Templar stepped in.

His presence was stronger than both of theirs, but even saying that, he was also dramatically lessoned by the weakened nature of the consciousness. And his raw form was… dramatically different, from how he presented himself usually in consciousness. His consciousness was, in theory, also a ball, but it waved out of his center in such constant motion that it was impossible tell where that center ball started, looking like a fog of dark smoke, with flashes of dark purple and red to give the fog an impression of depth, moving in and around it like lightning throughout a cloud. And his outline, a dark, green color, presented a simplified version of his ceremonial robes, while his hand and face…

The Templar looked at his ‘hand’ for a moment, startled briefly, if only because he had not seen his skeletal form in a long time. Then the outline bone structure of his skull looked away from his hand after a moment though, looking around, before his more experienced eyes quickly found the lit impression of Kokichi and Alter Ego in the mess of faded colors throughout this void.

He asked no questions. He knew what a mind that had just barely fought off the pull of death looked like. Kokichi looked stable, but also was likely still in the beginning of the process of digging himself out of the grave he had been thrown into. Temp walked (floated) over to the bed, his image shimmering and faltering under the pressure of movement.

{A feeling of comfort.}

{A sense of peace.}

{The immediate danger has passed. You are okay.}

Kokichi didn’t have any answers for his mentor. He had never had this level of self-awareness in his own mind after an attack before. He didn’t know what was happening, or what things looked like from the outside. What his family was dealing with…

(His family…)

He couldn’t quite...focus on Temp’s arrival, just like he couldn’t quite focus on anything, but...there was a small, tinkling laugh through the void again. {I don’t know if that means good things or bad things, coming from you, but...I’m pretty sure I’m alive, so I’ll take it as a comfort.}

A pause, before. {...would you come take me ‘away’ if I died, or is that not your purview?} 

Temp didn’t actually ‘smile’, physically-- any more than his perpetually smiling form already could--, but did smile regardless, giving the small, dim purple light next to the shimmering, unsteady form of the cat a fond look. 

{Not me, no. Not now.}

{Maybe in another life, had I been allowed to follow the natural path.}

{Those who follow Bathul sacrifice time in their afterlives to aid those navigating the other side. To lessen the chaos. To ease the pain and the fear.}

{When you pass, some things will be instinct for you. Some people, based on who they are, will need no guide at all. Some will be taken care of by their own gods. Some people barely realize they died, before making peace with it, offering their energy back to the universe and moving on peacefully.}

{Others get lost. They are disturbed, either by mistake or by intent. They run and put themselves in greater danger, or at risk of being adrift forever.}

{My kin sacrifice their time in the name of Bathul to aid these lost souls.}

{I doubt you will ever see my kin… but if you do? Do not fear.}

{We come to help you.}

{Help him now?} Alter Eg put out. Not liking the dark of Kokichi’s mind. Wishing his friend well again.

Temp hesitated… before shaking his head. {I would require trade. Great trade. And time will fix this on its own. I would not offer what I believe to be a bad deal, Kokichi. If you ask, I will say yes… but it will not be worth it.}

It was a comfort. It was...more or less, what Kokichi had guessed, when he learned of “reapers”. It really was a horrible name for them. For people who found themselves suddenly in the unknown of death, having someone there to explain and guide was...invaluable. They were like social workers for the afterlife. 

Vaguely, they would be able to see the outlines of Kokichi’s fingers scratch behind Alter Ego’s ears. {I’m sorry you have to see me like this...but Temp’s right. If it didn’t kill me already, I’ll get better. I always do. And...at least now, I can let a few people know I’m alright before I wake up.}

{...I don’t know when I’ll be okay again, though.}

{The program is being shut down, so no new people will be hurt, but...I don’t want people to continue to suffer while I recover.}

{What would you two feel is best to do?}

{For you? Rest. Maybe visit minds that bring you comfort during moments when you feel strong and bored.} Temp said honestly.

{Temp and I… we can try again on our own. I could take the next turn. But I feel we will use valuable observations  practicing it without you. And we need to double check on the defenses already put in place, ensure they’re working as functioned. Considering both of those are your partners, it would feel wrong to go without you.}

{I, for one, think it would be a … potentially dangerous mistake to visit Maki’s mind from now on, based on the events you all explained to me. Dragons are one of the few creatures in all of existence who pose a serious danger to the consciousness by itself. It was why so many creatures in the magical and non-magical community banned together to dwindle the creatures into what I had believed was extinction, for better or for worse. I would not say that Maki would hurt any of us… but caution should be taken, simply because she could. I would recommend not visiting her mind idly.} 

Resting was...about all he was going to be able to do for a while. In the best case, he would wake up soon, and be able to talk with his partners and friends when he had the energy, and just listen to them when he didn’t. But there was going to be a lot of time he was just...sleeping. And he would need that rest. But...it’d be nice to get some visiting in then too. 

Maki…

There was a sense of sympathetic mourning that filled the void for a moment. Perhaps it was for a good reason. But...for an entire species to be wiped out? Except for Maki, who was living as a human now. It...didn’t feel fair at all…

{Understood. I still have reservations about visiting any non-empath idly, but...I’ll remember caution in particular when it comes to Maki.}

{I think she’s coming home soon… She’s going to be so mad if I’m not recovered by then… She’ll give Kaito another piercing.}

{If he pisses off a literal ancient red dragon, even one as condensed and physically altered as that one is? And only comes away with pierced ears? There are cultures some millenia ago that would have considered a feat like that alone worthy of making him their king.} Temp said, somewhat joking, though not entirely.

{I understand your desire to help. To keep our experiments going. Later, when you’re feeling stronger, we should re-discuss the idea more, figure out how we’re going to progress… but for now?} Alter Ego sighed, rubbing their head against Kokichi’s ‘leg’, {The world managed before we decided to save it, and it will manage a few weeks longer for us to succeed. For now, let’s just focus on you getting back to function.}

{While I cannot offer anything without trade, I will still ask… if you could be aided in any way, hypothetically? Is there anything myself or Alter Ego could do to ease this experience?}

There was the impression that, somewhere, Kokichi was smiling. An ancient red dragon that had her friend reminisce about her puffy cheeks and that held her when she cried and let her regularly stab him because the pain was worth her friendship. Kokichi wondered if he’d even be able to share the enormity of that with Kaito. He wondered if Kaito would care at all. 

Probably not. Maki was Maki. Dragon and all. 

He wasn’t happy to hear about their experiments being suspended while he was out of sorts, but...he understood. And going to see Maki the week before had given them some thinking points. They needed to see if there were side-effects and long-term effects other than just...not being compelled by the conditioning. Part of experimentation was observation. 

...it wasn’t like people’s conditioning was going to get worse. And...maybe letting the knowledge settle that the program was over, and everyone was free would help people in the long run when they needed to figure out defences. 

Kokichi was quiet for a moment, the outline of his hand gone, faded back into the void for the time being. {...I like being able to talk to you guys, even if I’m asleep in the physical world. Having company makes it a lot better. And...just letting me know what’s happening? Not necessarily in the world at large but...things about the day-to-day? It helps me feel...connected.}

{Temp...I wouldn’t expect you to do anything...but if you could keep an eye on my partners, I’d appreciate it. I hate to think how they’re taking this…}

Temp seeme to consider this… and while he didn’t say it, he sent out the impression, {Well, while I can’t trade my time in any way, if I just so happen to want to visit the castle tomorrow for their free meals, and hear about what happened, well, of course I’d tell Amber and Stacy, who are going to want to go in and check, resulting in me checking in and, frankly, it’s for my own pleasure to come visit you after the effect, letting you know how things in the castle are… purely a selfish, self-indulgent decision. No trade necessary.}

{...do you have to do mental loops like that… all the time or…?} Alter Ego asked, either barely their form still somehow managing to look incredulous.

{Yes.} Temp responded back simply. Something mildly exhausted in the answer. {Yes.}

{Meanwhile… I am here for as long as my presence is a comfort.} Alter Ego decided, resting their head against the impression of Kokichi’s lap, purring slightly, {I can not always be active inside of your mind, because you do need to allow your body to actually rest. You know this is not true rest, when you’re projecting… but when you are resting, I will still be here, resting as well, if you will have me. My presence will keep you safer, as your defenses are all down, and having a solid consciousness resting within you might encourage healing… though I do not know if that is true. It’s a rumor among Empaths I’ve heard a few times now.}

{In my experience, it is true, but with caveats. The two consciousness seem to need to feel at peace with each other, for their to be any perceived bonuses, and even then, it might be entirely placebo. Rooming with a consciousness that makes you uncomfortable or that you despise has notable, very real adverse effects though, both physically and mentally.} Temp said, though he huffed a small laugh, {Somehow, I think your presence with each other won’t qualify for those negative effects though. Alter Ego just following their true calling as a therapy pet.}

{I’m not a pet. I just look like a cat.}

{Right… did you pick that or…?}

That impression of a smile grew, and while it only lasted for a moment, a drop of that watercolor vision plopped down at the head of the bed, showing Kokichi’s smile “in person”. 

{I really appreciate it, guys.}

{And I’m always happy to have you here, Alter Ego. All time we’ve spent together has been a pleasure, even if it hasn’t always been happy. I don’t feel like I have any threats in particular looming over me, but...I’d feel safe and comforted, knowing you’re here.}

{Hopefully I’ll be able to see you properly soon. I guess we’ll...see how long it takes.}

Kokichi...really wasn’t alone anymore. Even in the case he felt his most isolated, when he hadn’t even been allowed to interact with his conscious world...this was probably one of the things he was most thankful for about his gift. Now, even when the world was out of reach, he had a friend that would purr in his lap and another that would share his vision of the world and go through mental hoops to be a connection to the real world. 

{Remind me to do something really nice for you guys when I feel better.}

-

At first, between Kaito and Shuichi, there had been a quiet, peaceful unity in this experience. Both of them looking after Kokichi together, while occasionally-- frequently, even-- people would stop by, offering help or just checking in. 

Then, Shuichi had said he wasn’t going to class anymore, and Kaito had made the mistake of trying to talk him into going. Nervous of Shuichi being, well… in the room with a sleeping Kokichi, 24/7, for… however long this was going to last. Worried that it wasn’t going to be good for his boyfriends mental health, having no more reasons to not even leave the room, let alone the castle. To leave the constant beep of the heart monitor.

He shouldn’t have said anything. It was probably one of the worst fights they had ever had.

It wasn’t, physically, much of a fight. It wasn’t even that loud. It was just… a lot of things that stung, said. Little things that because they knew each other, so well, for so long, they knew would bite. Ultimately, it had ended with Shuichi saying, “Well, look what good your help did him.” and Kaito, looking like he was slapped in the face, had snarled, “Fine. I don’t give a shit what you do anyway. Don’t come to me next time you’re freaking out.”

And Shuichi had curled up onto the bed with Kokichi and Kaito had locked himself in the bathroom and curled into the bathroom and both of them spent some time hating each other and then hating themselves.

It was a few hours before Kaito broke first and came out, a nervous, hung dog look on his face, starting to apologize, and Shuichi bursts into tears, apologizing first. They talk it out for awhile. Apologize again. 

Kokichi’s still asleep.

But things are a little better after the fight. Kaito supports Shuichi not going to class anymore, Shuichi agrees to talk to Miss Crystal in the gardens. It gets him outside, and Kaito had been hoping Shuichi would agree to the additional therapy. Kaito reserves his nagging on other matters, things too difficult right now for Shuichi to not feel put upon at Kaito’s concern. Shuichi doesn’t talk about the fact that Kaito, in turn, only leaves Kokichi’s side-- when someone else is around to watch him, for one-- to run errands or check on Timothy or some other thing that feels like it needs to be done.

They don’t talk about what’s happening in Luminary at all.

Kokichi is still asleep.

Guests come randomly, but they’re always a welcome breath of fresh air, for the most part. The help is needed, and every time someone comes up, they offer themselves for help. Any errands to run today? Anything you guys need? Anything we can do?

So far, Katio’s personal favorite visit-- only because it was so over the top-- was Kokichi’s friends from the dance club. Amber, Stacy and Temp showed up after, they assured Kaito and Shuichi, a quick, informative trip to Seiko’s pharmacy for some information on Kokichi, and once they had confirmed it wouldn’t hurt him?

“Uh… this is… very generous, you guys.” Kaito had said, while Amber held the door open, looking a little smug as three men, including Stacy and Temp, along with what Amber had brought herself, just fucking filled the room with flowers and balloons. “...is it maybe… a bit much? How much did this cost you?”

“Don’t worry about that. And we know it’s a bit much! Don’t worry, we’re not leaving clean up to you guys. Honestly, me and Stacy taaaalked about it, and we thought it’d be a good excuse to justify us coming back every few days, however long this, liiiiiike, lasts? To water the flowers? And the scents are supposed to have benefits to coma paaatients?”

“This wasn’t necessarily our idea. We asked some healers and they said they’ve seen peeps doing stuff like this for good results. Makes things nice, keeps people engaged, makes the room feel ‘different’ when things are different… do you hate it? If you hate it, we can get rid of it. We’re donating them to the local healer offices when Kokichi’s done with them, along with some care home. We figured Kokichi would dig that. We can just do that early if you hate it, it’s no big deal.”

“Kokichi’s going to think he’s woken up in the gardens.” Shuichi observed dryly.

“I don’t… hate it… it’s just a lot.” Kaito observed, though his attention was taken away from them figuring out where to display all the flowers by Temp, who was determined to get info about how he and Shuichi were doing, and was doing that weird thing he did where he was trying to act casual about it, even though that was clearly what he was trying to do and honestly wasn’t even that weird in context.

As Kaito was interrogated by Temp, Amber finally had a moment from re-arranging the flowers to flourish around the bed, looking down at Kokichi.

“...Oh, baby…” She said softly, putting her arms around her waist uncomfortably, just… hating how he looked right now. This bed dwarfed him. He looked haggard and unwell. Too pale…

Stacy put a hand on her shoulder. “He’s gonna wake up. For now, let’s make the room nice. If he’s not rolling his eyes at us by the time he wakes up, we didn’t try hard enough.”

The room really did look like something right out of a botanical garden, but somehow Nazumi’s nose didn’t tip her off until the door opened for her and...she paused, eyes wide. A comfortable pot of brightly colored yellow and blue pansies in her hands. 

It looked almost like the kid had slathered every shade on his palette across the room, making it so colorful you’d think it’d be hard to look at, but it somehow just made the space...happy. 

The woman’s expression softened before she grinned at Amber and Stacy, recognizing them. “Think we can find room for one more?”

Amber looked over her shoulder, and grinned brightly, delighted to see the older woman again as she said, “Nazumi! Nah, girl, please! For you? We’ll find a place of honor!”

They moved some flowers they had put on the edge of the nightstand, placing the pot nicely and safely in the center, Stacy gushing over the sweet little flowers as Amber gave her a look before asking, “So like… you accepting hugs? Or firm handshakes? Or what? Cause I wanna do one of those things. I heard you got Kokichi to doctors in straight up like fiiiive minutes. You’re my fucking hero, girl.”

Nazumi didn’t know the science behind it, but for some reason blue and yellow pansies were the strongest-smelling out of every color. Considering the garden the princes’ room had become, scent wasn’t going to be much of an issue but...people in comas could hear and smell before they woke up. She was hoping it would be comforting to him. 

Looking over to Amber, Nazumi let out a soft laugh, not...exactly looking all proud of her accomplishments, but she opened an arm for a hug, knowing that the sweet woman was a good person and a dear friend of her nephew’s, having seen it in action during their trip to the swamp. “I’m glad I was able to get him ta help quickly. Couldn’ tell ya what exactly was goin’ through my mind, but...I’m thankful Dr. Seiko’s pharmacy was nearby. Think it was just luck I didn’t bowl any folks over as I was tailin’ it.”

She barely remembered the run. Just knew that Kokichi was struggling to breathe in her arms and that she had to go, faster, get help now. She was thankful too that she’d managed to calm down a bit by the time Kaito showed up. The man was struggling enough with the reality, he didn’t need to see his husband’s bodyguard flipping her shit too. 

“Hell yeah, bring it in girl!” Amber grinned, pulling Nazumi into a hug the second she got permission, before calling over to Stacy, “Stacy! Stacy! We’re hugging Nazumi!”

“Oh shit, why did you start without me?” Stacy asked, looking up from finishing the arrangements on the flowers by the window, which Shuichi had idly started helping her out with, before watching with some amusement as Stacy ran over and threw herself into the hug as well. “Hugs for Nazumi!”

“I’m just saying, if you need anything? Anything at all, please feel free to reach out to me. It’s really no trouble at all-” Temp was still saying to Kaito, feeling like he had ended this conversation with no real insight into how Kaito or Shuichi were doing, unfortunately just not very close to either of them, unable to get Kaito to open up to him. Kaito had been nodding along, but had looked over his shoulder at Shuichi-

“Hey, handsome, let me help you with that.” Kaito said, seeing Shuichi trying to bend over to pick up one of the larger vases and move it around, “Sorry, Temp, give me a bit.”

“Oh, yeah… okay.” Temp sighed, watching Kaito run off, before giving Kokichi a look.

...he looked alright. For the circumstances. It looked like they were doing a good job keeping him clean. 

Nazumi’s laugh was a little livelier as she embraced the two younger women. Just...the affection of people who cared about someone she cared about too. Distant, but no less precious or full. 

She was glad Kokichi had these people in his life. That his life was full of people, from close partners to deep friendships to more casual friends and friendly acquaintances. There would be people all over wishing Kokichi a speedy full recovery. The love in his life was made more by the people in it, not split between them. 

“You gals sure are good friends to Kokichi… He’s gonna be thrilled to see what’cha’ve done with the place when he wakes up.”

“He better! We’re hoping for either a smile or a laugh, one of those! And, again… or well, not again, since you just got here Nazumi. But we figured making sure the plants don’t become a burden on the guys will keep us accountable to be, liiiike, continuously visiting and stuff. Gotta make sure these things won’t wilt before Kokichi wakes up! It’ll, like, ruin the whole effect!”

“So, like…. Any idea when he will wake up?” Stacy asked, looking somewhat uncomfortable at Kokichi, “I mean, I know you won’t know know till he does, but, like… guestimates?”

“Sorry… no ones really sure. The heart attack itself went as well as a heart attack can, Kokichi was treated prompt and well, but…” Shuichi sighed, resting at the window seat, framed by sunlight and flowers, which contrasted strangely with his look of gloom, “He just… physically wasn’t in a good place when it happened. So no one has a good guess on how long the recovery will take.”

“It won’t be long.” Kaito said simply, heading over to Kokichi and adjusting his pillow a bit, saying brightly, “Maybe a little bit, sure, but our ‘Kichi doesn’t really like to sit around too much. He’ll be up and about before ya know it. He just needs some rest for now.”

Nazumi smiled. The smell of the flowers and his friends’ voices regularly coming by. It should light a fire under the kid’s butt to wake up. 

She found her gaze following Kaito over to Kokichi, sighing softly at the rough diagnosis they had to work with. “In the past, he’s been asleep from anywhere from two days to a week, an’ that’s just to wake up the first time. Recovery beyond that takes a chunk too. But...Kaito’s right. It’s rest he needs, then he’ll be up an’ askin’ everything his clever little head can think of while he’s in bed. We just gotta be patient while he’s sleepin’.”

“He has a lot to wake up for,” she softly smiled, reaching out to cup her hand over the lump where his was under the blanket for a moment. “And scientifically? That does make a difference. People comin’ ‘round, talkin’ to him--it’ll help.” They just had to wait and see, hoping that he’d wake up sooner rather than later. Hoping that this wasn’t going to be one of those horrible weeks where they could only imagine what Kokichi would say about things.

Stacy seemed to consider Shuichi at the window, just how… down the man was. Not that he didn’t have a reason to be. It was just disheartening… and then she glanced slightly to the left, where a card table looked like it had been half abandoned in the corner, a… “Is that a puzzle?” She asked, heading over to the corner.

Shuichi looked over, “Oh, yes. A blank puzzle. We thought about putting it together, but time just kind of got away from us…”

“Blank? Why blank?”

“Kaito likes the challenge. He’s got a good eye for little details. Plus you can write things on them…”

“Oh… oh! If I help with the puzzle, can I write something on it?” Stacy asked, looking at the puzzle with interest, in the corner a date written in sharpie, likely when they had first started the puzzle, and otherwise just a small cutsy face with a tongue sticking out.

“Oh, um… Kaito?”

“Sure! That’s the point of it! Though, I guess let me… get it out of the corner? Maybe we can put it by the bed? Anyone else wanna fuss with it a little?”

“Ugh, I suck at puzzles. I still call getting to write on it too though. I’ll be a cheerleader.” Amber decided, “We need more chairs. Where can we get more chairs?”

Eventually, chairs and placing were figured out, and as the group chatted, the puzzle, little by little, started to form.

-

In the dark, drops of watercolor pattering slightly through the room, peacefully giving it its most barest of shapes.

Alter Ego shifted. Eyes still closed, but nose twitching.

“...something smells nice.” They murmured into Kokichi’s side.

“Flowers…” Kokichi murmured. His voice was almost impossibly soft, but that didn’t matter too much where they were. The fact that he could speak and didn’t have to send his intent? It was huge. And meant that he could surface for just a moment before sinking back down into sleep. 

“...I can’t tell what type… It kind of just...smells like walking through the gardens.”

“...my sister and her partner brought me flowers last time… They usually do when I get sick. I think I forgot to ask if Kai-chan watered them while I was asleep...but they were bright and full when I woke up.”

“...It makes me happy that someone’s watering the flowers…”

“...well, they smell good… I kind of want to bite them…” Alter Ego laughed softly. Still not opening their eyes. Matching the energy level of the consciousness, not wanting to pull Kokichi further up to the surface than he intends to be. Melt into the scenery. “...why do cats eat grass and plants? It’s the strangest thing… every time I see grass, I always kind of want to chew on it…”

“I...I think that’s why I started reading botany books so much,” Kokichi hummed, long-forgotten memories easier to recall when he was in his mind like this. “It’s well-known that lilies are toxic to cats… I’d see strays in the castle gardens sometimes eating plants, and I’d be scared that they were eating something bad for them… ‘specially since they’d always throw up the grass.”

“Though...there is a kind of grass you can buy that’s specifically for cats. I still don’t know why it’s an impulse, but...it made me feel better to know people had figured out an alternative…” He smiled a bit. “Never did convince anyone to replace the lawn with cat grass…”

“Monsters.” Alter Ego chuckled softly, “Give me their names, I’ll go fill their dreams with cats vomiting up grass on their favorite shirts. That’ll show ‘em.”

-

While most of them definitely were, just with the added purpose of spending time with Kaito and Shuuichi, not every guest to the princes’ room came because of Kokichi. 

Drake definitely felt awkward standing at their door, but...even if it hadn’t been that long since Shuuichi withdrew from the rest of the semester, he’d been missing days off and on for a bit. While the vampire certainly felt guilty about not being there to protect his friend, more than that...he just missed Shuuichi. So just because the pregnant man couldn’t muster up his will to walk across the city didn’t mean they couldn’t still see each other. 

He’d gotten a sweet blended drink from a cafe they stopped by every now and then when they had hung out after class--getting a drink for Kaito as well, and knowing enough to not get a sweet one--and...Drake shifted his weight before knocking on their door, hoping he wasn’t coming at a bad time.