Archive TP 15 — The Bog

Kokichi took a breath as he felt the carriage stop, shifting to rub Shuuichi’s back, but he didn’t try to leave. It would help if he got Shuuichi’s chair and handed it over, making things easier to get Shuuichi out, but...he couldn’t leave Shuuichi, not yet. They would have to be separated, Kokichi couldn’t go into the delivery room, but...for now, he wasn’t leaving Shuuichi’s side for anything.

“We’re here, we’re here,” he told his boyfriend, soothing in voice and touch. “Just a tiny bit longer, Shuu-chan, we’re at the finish line. You’ve done so well.”

Ikuo was inside, having talked with the hospital receptionist and got them on the road to checked in, though they’d immediately sent notice to Dr. Tenchi and the others in the delivery ward. As it was, there was already a healer heading to the lobby to collect Shuuichi (and Kaito and Maki) with a gurney just past into privacy waiting for him.

Dr. Varessing really had mostly come for the families peace of mind-- any way that Shuichi’s body could have failed him beyond passing out from heart irregularities or breathing issues would have been solved by doing what they were already doing, which was going to the hospital-- but they did hop out of the carriage and quickly go to give the healer a run down of Shuichi’s symptoms, roughly how long had he been in labor, how many minutes they had been able to observe between what they assumed were contractions. “He’s not been given anything.” They added, before giving Kaito a pointed look, “Right?”

“Nothing, nothing.” Kaito quickly agreed, “He had a ton of sugar-water before bed and hasn’t had anything since.”

Timothy carried the hospital bag in, followed by Chase, looking around quietly before shuffling over to Ikou, mostly just standing by to be told what he was supposed to be doing next.

Now that they were at the hospital? And Kaito didn’t feel like his actions were the only thing standing between Shuichi and something horrible happening… his eyes undilated, and his breathing started to quicken, looking around nervously as he looked at the gurney like he barley knew what it was as he said, too loudly, “Do you want Shuichi on that? I can lift him. I’m good at lifting!”

Maki glanced at him, before reaching over to pinch Kaito’s arm. Not hard, but a warning that he was starting to panic.

Kokichi walked right beside Shuuichi as they wheeled him into the hospital, still holding his hand and stroking his wrist. But it was soon time.

“Please take a breath, sir,” the healer gently, but firmly said. “If your partner would feel more comfortable, help him onto the bed--your room is ready for you, Mr. Saihara; be taking deep breaths as well. Can you describe…”

And in that calm, professional whirlwind...Kokichi was left behind, watching his family go beyond doors he couldn’t cross yet. There was a small sitting area they’d go to just outside of the room Shuuichi would be recovering in, but...everything needed to be set up first. So for now…

Kokichi was broken out of his trance as a warm hand squeezed his shoulder, and he looked over, lost, and...still just standing in the lobby.

“Le’s sit down ‘til the’r ready fer us,” Ikuo said softly. “Brought extra clothes fer ya if ya wanna change in th’ restroom.”

...Kokichi turned and hugged his dad, hiding his face in his shoulder for a moment. “...thanks, Dad.”

The next few moments were a whirlwind that Shuichi struggled to keep up with. Shuichi answered the question as they came, but he kept looking around, alarmed by the whole situation. Shuichi had been in the hospital, any hospital, for an injured person he wasn’t there to question twice, once for Maki, once for Kaito. Maki’s had been a nearby mission that had gone dramatically wrong, and Kaito and Shuichi-- who had been lucky to even hear about it in time-- had gone to stand guard along with two other friends, not wanting anyone to take advantage of the downed assassin. Kaito, in turn, had been stabbed for protecting Shuichi from some criminals that had decided trying to off Shuichi was a safer bet than hoping he didn’t find anything on them. Kaito had been in good spirits for the situation, and while Maki had been asleep for hers, being surrounded by like minded friends had made Maki’s visit easier too.

Being the person in the gurney was much scarier. It was a very different experience. Shuichi felt extremely out of control, able to do little more than watching the lights of the ceiling pass him by as people pushed him into place, talking around him, occasionally to him. Shuichi found himself staring at Kaito and Maki, Kaito looking more and more nervous, Maki looking calmer and calmer.

Kaito looked so nervous that Shuichi found himself saying, “It’s okay, Kaito…”

His boyfriend jumped at that, apparently not having realized how plainly he was wearing his fear, and just like that it was (mostly) gone, Kaito beaming back at him as he said, “Course it is! Everything’s almost done, handsome! Just a nap left to go!”

Shuichi’s eyes drifted to a needle the healer was preparing-- where was Dr. Tenchi?-- and suddenly, in a wave of nerves, said to Kaito and Maki, “Be here when I wake up.”

“Of course, we’re not leaving you, we’re gonna be right here.” Kaito insisted, heading over and running his hand over Shuichi’s temple, squeezing his hand.

“Nothing could make us leave.” Maki promised, standing watch by the wall. Eyes wide and focused, old, protective instincts wanting her to keep an eye on the whole room. “It’s going to be fine. Get some rest.”

Shuuichi’s health and comfort was the priority, so it was just by chance that when Elodie came out of the delivery room he was already out. But she knew at least Kaito well enough, and Maki had made an impression the one time they’d met. “We’re still in the same area, but they’re going to put Shuuichi in a medical robe, and you two need to put these on, and sanitize up.”

Elodie held out two bundles, observation aprons and medical masks in each--she was wearing them herself over hospital scrubs, her hair already away and secured in a cap. “You can’t approach him while he has an open wound,” she repeated, having already gone over this with Kaito when he expressed a desire to be in the delivery room, “And you’ll need to take these off and sanitize again before you go to him after the surgery. Follow these rules, and you can stay.”

And with the business said, the doctor’s eyes crinkled above her mask, showing her grin. “Congratulations. I’ll do my best for you all.”

Shuichi was asleep, Kokichi was in the other room, and when they started preparing to cut Shuichi, Kaito started to cry.

It was quiet tears, Kaito not wanting to get the healers attentions, desperately not wanting to give them a reason to kick him out. He didn’t want them to cut his boyfriend. It was an irrational feeling but he didn’t want it. He was supposed to keep Shuichi safe, he had promised nothing would happen to him, and they were going to cut him. Kaito wanted to take him out of here, take him home, keep him safe.

Maki glanced up at him, before quietly saying, “Shuichi and Miyako need this. And just because no one else is looking, doesn’t mean you’re allowed to lose it.”

“Shuichi needs this.” Kaito whispered back, echoing, “Miyako needs this… my daughters on my way.”

“She is.” Maki whispered. “She needs you to be strong.”

“I need to be strong for Miyako.” Kaito echoed, “I can do it. I can do it…”

Kaito’s throat closed up in alarm as he saw a scalpel disappear behind a barrier, and he mindlessly reached for Maki’s hand. “Don’t let me break.”

Maki squeezed his hand back. “Not on your life.” she promised.

Timothy was petting Chase, not entirely certain how long this was going to take, but the way Ikou seemed to settle in, he guessed it was gonna be awhile.

He was still tired. In his mind, he thought he might be going soft from not maintaining his military lifestyle anymore, always feeling sleepy now if he didn’t get a full nights rest. Unaware that he was just going on ten and that the next several years were just going to be the start of growth bursts that were going to eventually leave him a sleepy, ravenous teenager.

But he was sleepy, and trying to fight off the urge to lean against Chase and nod off. Glancing sleepily over at Uncle Kokichi.

Kokichi had gone to change in the bathroom, feeling awkward about hanging around the hospital in his pajamas, even if it was a place that went above and beyond in not giving a shit about what people were wearing. Ikuo had brought extra clothes for Tim, too--picked out by Maki ahead of time--and...had actually brought clothes for all of them, though Kokichi knew Maki and Kaito weren’t going to go anywhere to change until Shuuichi woke up.

Ikuo had brought things to pass the time at the hospital, but Kokichi was feeling too nervous to read or do word puzzles or anything like that. Instead...he was just curled up in his chair outside Shuuichi’s resting room, partially leaning against his dad as Ikuo took the time to read, having gone through reassuring Kokichi, and knowing that Kokichi just needed someone there.

...he noticed Tim’s eyes on him, and he smiled softly. “If you want to sleep, I promise to wake you up when they come here. You won’t miss a thing.”

Timothy huffed, a little haughty as he said, “I’m not tired. You can go to sleep if you need to and I’ll wake you.”

His tone was (attempting to be, anyway) as confident as any of his mothers reassurances that she could stay up one night, two, indefinitely, effortlessly… but his eyes blinked heavier, leaning against Chase who gave him a few happy licks against his chin and cheek.

“Thank you, Tim,” Kokichi said softly. “You’re really going to be a great big brother.”

He would probably fall asleep against his wishes, but Kokichi would keep to his word. Even if he needed his sleep, there was no way Kokichi was going to keep him from seeing his little sister as soon as any of them could.

Kokichi couldn’t even pretend to humor his nephew, though, and settle down for sleep. For one, Tim would probably push himself to stay up even more, and that was kind of the opposite of what Kokichi wanted to encourage. But...he felt too high-strung to pretend to sleep, let alone get anywhere near actually sleeping. Electric, like he’d spring into uncontrollable cartwheels at a moment’s notice.

It would probably be a little over an hour. Kokichi felt like it could be seconds.

It was a typical surgery, but it took time. And patience. And as much as they hurried to get there, it would be a few hours still before things were done.

And while no one could stay, thanks to Denji’s efforts, word got around, and one by one as those hours went by…

“BABY!”

Amber ran into the room, looking far less fashionable than usual, wearing little more than a hoodie and sweatpants and tennis shoes without socks, no makeup on her face while Stacy, day old-makeup mushed on her face and in a similar state, came in holding a basket, yawning. “EEEEEEE!” Amber squealed, jostling Tim a little, who blinked tiredly twice before leaning back on Chase, going back to sleep, as she ran to hug Kokichi, “I went and grabbed Stacy as soon as I heard! Ahhhhhh, are you freaking out!? I’m freaking out! This is so exciting!”

She hugged him tight, a small, wrapped gift in her hand, before beaming at the older man next to Kokichi as she said, “Hi! I’m Amber, this is Stacy. Were Kokichi’s friends! This is so awesome, we had to come check on you and say Congrats!!”

“Congraa-aaaaaawn…” Stacy yawned, trying again, “Congrats Kokichi… brought food. Hope you don’t mind, it’s sandwiches and stuff, what I could put together short notice…”

Kokichi was thankful for everyone coming by, every hug and word of congratulations and excitement to see the baby when everyone was settled back home… It grounded him more. Reminded him that his family and community was big, with strong, loving connections and...no one was alone. The world was big, and when you looked at the people, far less scary than it could make itself out to be. He had support, and Miya was being born into that same loving world.

Still, Kokichi startled out of a bit of a daze as he heard a familiar voice, barely able to stand before he was pulled into a tight hug. “Am-chan, Stacchan! You’re here…” Unlikely, but close friends, who’d woken up in the middle of the night and ran across town to congratulate their friend on the birth of his daughter…

He hugged Amber tight and grinned at Stacy, gratitude swimming in his eyes. “Guys...thank you. The food is perfect, I’m sure we’re all going to forget breakfast when it comes.”

Ikuo set his book to the side--as he had done for the other guests, being personable, and yet a constant of calm, which Kokichi sorely needed--and nodded a greeting. “M’Ikuo, nice ta meetcha. ‘Kich’s spoken fond ‘a ya both.”

“I’m...I’m really excited,” Kokichi half-laughed, letting out a stuttered sigh. “Part of me can’t believe this is happening, and the rest just can’t wait until they’re done in the delivery room. It feels like it’s been years since we found out, and now, at any moment, she’s gonna really be here…”

Amber grinned at that, eyes lit and excited, before glancing at the door to the rest of the hospital as she said, “Well, sheesh, could they hurry it up? I honestly thought by the time we got here we’d be cooing over her in your arms. Ah well… anyway, we’re not gonna hover, we’re not trying to add any complications or extra hosting work for ya, Stacy wanted to make certain you all would eat--” Amber grinned at her friend, who gave a sleepy thumbs up, “-- and Iiiiiii have been working on a present for you for months.”

Amber laughed at that, handing Kokichi the small box and saying with a huff, “Now, I know you’re not a jewelry guy, which is fiiiiine, whatever. So even though I’ve put my heart and soul into these pieces, I guess you don’t have to wear them, they can just be nice things you tuck away into your desk drawer or something, like a monster.”

Stacy, for Kokichi’s benefit, rolled her eyes at their friends dramatics.

“But, just know that I made this out of love and gratitude and also because once the design was in my head I could not let it go.” Amber laughed, “Okay, okay! Open it up, tell me how beautiful I know it is, and we’ll head off and leave you to it. Oh, and since I know you can’t tell the difference-- they’re ankle bracelets.”

Inside the box were two small ankle bracelets, one regular small, once very much baby small. They were both intricately carved and molded by red tazarite and white gold, creating what looked like little swirling vines covered in light, red and white flowers, the flower petals all seeming to have had various more colorful gems, blue, purple, pink, melted into the delicate curves. For being as detailed as it was, neither of the ankle bracelets had any hard edges, and was smooth and flexible to the touch, each piece designed to bend, wth the back parts bound to short, study chains and clasps.

“I’ve designed it that, if she ever wants too, she can get more chain added to hers as she gets older. And they’re not designed to come off with a yank, so she can’t just pull it off and eat it, if you’re setting her up or a nice picture or something… I just thought, well… matching daddy/baby ankle bracelets?” Amber laughed, suddenly looking sheepish, “I don’t know, I thought it was cute.”

Kokichi gave his friends a fond look--as much as he’d love for his whole family and all of his friends around to see the baby, it would doubtlessly overwhelm both her and Shuuichi...and it was against hospital policy--and, while their time was short, was glad they came by, but he gave Amber a surprised look, not having expected any gifts for him among the slowly filling room.

He’d known Amber had wanted to make him a jewelry piece, so...she had, and this was it, apparently. Rolling his eyes a bit at her dramatics and bold claims that would never happen because he loved Amber’s work and would put in the effort to remember to wear whatever she gave him because it was going to be amazing and full of affection, so of course he would...he opened the box.

And at first was confused by the two items, the sizes throwing him off until Amber explained and…

They were perfect.

Kokichi had been able to stave off tears all night so far, but right there he broke, surging forward to hide the shininess in his eyes as he hugged Amber. “They’re beautiful. Thank you. Kai-chan’s gonna yell at me for trying to wear it in the shower, that’s how much I’m gonna wear it.”

Sniffling, he leaned back to beam up at his friend. “True genius strikes again, huh?”

“I just can’t help it,” Amber sighed, embracing her friend tightly as he clung to her, beaming down at him with renewed confidence, “It just falls off me like dandruff, I swear.”

Amber laughed some more at Kokichi’s declaration to wear them in the shower, saying the main jewelry would be fine but the chain and clasp might rust after awhile, so keep an eye on that if he actually was gonna do that. Then, after Stacy gave him a firm hug, Amber gave him one more long hug, before backing up, laughing with tears in her eyes which she tried to sooth by blowing wind into them, flapping her hands, “Ugh, I’m such a softie. Okay! We’re going, we’re out! I can’t wait to meet Miyako, baby! Eat some of Stacy’s sandwiches and drink water, you don’t want to be passing out the first time you hold your daughter! Mu-wah! Mu-wah,” Amber blew kisses into the air as the two headed out, calling over her shoulder, “We love you, good luck! Bye~”

Kokichi waved and laughed as he tried to get his own tears to stop, calling farewells to his friends until they left.

He had always wanted a big family, and while they were getting a new addition today...he hadn’t needed to adopt a bunch of kids to get it. His family was all around him.

Still sniffling a little, Kokichi sat back down and brought a leg up, clasping the larger ankle bracelet around his right ankle. Miya’s would stay safe in the box, but Kokichi just admired it for a moment, smiling to himself.

“Ya got good friends, Bunny.”

“...I really do.”

It turned out, that first scalpel cut had just been to put some incisions in, inserting staples and plugs that would keep inserting fluids that would keep Shuichi’s body from going into shock. Then there was marking future insertions, the doctors confirming with each other everything was ready, going over a long and throughout check list. It was almost an hour before they finally started cutting properly, and while it still made Kaito nauseous, seeing how thoroughly out Shuichi was and how well prepared the doctors were eased his nerves considerably.

And he was surprised at how long it took to open Shuichi up. He had sort of imagined one quick cut down his stomach and then boom, out Miya would come, but it ended up being far more complicated than that. Kaito watching as the doctors calmly, for lack of better words, ‘took things out and put them aside for a bit’ in their work to get to her.

Kaito had felt calm. For a moment there, as he got used to the extremely strange and somewhat horrifying view in front of him, he even relaxed. Settling in, still holding Maki’s hand, but leaning against the wall. Everything was fine. Everything was okay.

And… everything was fine.

There was, briefly, a strange, surprised gurgling sound. Kaito heard it clearly, but hadn’t known what it was… until that small, light gurgling sound, very offended by the sudden bright lights and hands invading her home--

“Urghl… waaa-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!”

Kaito’s knees almost gave out on him, Maki suddenly grabbing his arm and waist as Kaito stared, wide eyed and shocked, as everything seemed to happen all at once, the doctors swiftly and cleanly pulling the screaming infant free of Shuichi. The small figure, still quite offended by this series of events, letting everyone in the room know just how rude they were being as she screamed her little mushy head off. Kaito holding onto Maki’s steady figure. Tears running down his face, a grin splitting him ear to ear.

Miyako.

Miyako was here.

Alter Ego, resting from their latest training attempt, blinked and looked up, alarmed. A pulse of power running through his lobby.

The Templar, who was preparing to visit Kokichi and the family in the morning, sat-upright in bed. His stomach tensing up with sudden, knowing concern, before closing his eyes and starting to project, the thought ringing in his head ‘I need to get to her, I need to shield her, I need to at least try.’

Monokuma felt the pulse and just started to laugh. Long and loud and hysterical.

Oh… that’s gonna be interesting.

Usami sat up with a start, startling the light sleepers who had stayed. She stuttered out an apology, tried to get them to go back to sleep, but…

...wow...was that really?

Could things really…?

Junko Enoshima looked in the direction of Dicea, where the presence was reaching from… and for the first time in hundreds of years, in genuine concern, thought, ‘Oh… fuck.’

That’s not good.

And the pulse spread and spread. And her presence was massive and immediate. And…

Kokichi went absolutely still, his head snapping to the direction the surgical rooms were in the hospital. Eyes starting to fill with tears as he stared fixedly into nothing, and, slowly, his rapturous expression melted into a smile.

“...she’s here…” he whispered, just barely breathing it out.

Ikuo sighed and closed his book, sitting up to put a hand on Kokichi’s back, there to support his son when he was done with whatever he’d noticed this time. It seemed like it was a good thing that Temp fella had pulled him aside.

(“She’s here,” Kokichi said with his whole being, cheering and crying and...a part of him absolutely terrified, but too trapped to do anything. Anything but send a message to one of the people he trusted most.)

(“She’s here,” Kokichi sent to Alter Ego, unknowing that, at least partially, his mentor already knew.)

A lot of things happened at once.

Imagine vines.

Imagine silver vines, straight from The Dead Forest. Reaching and stretching and pushing towards Miyako, all at once. Trying to ensnare her. Grab her. Bring her into the fold. Family. Subject. Us. Us. Us.

And Junko Enoshima, the root of the vines, goes Me.

Alter Ego and The Templar of Death and Trade do not hesitate. They know they are not ready, that their defenses could fail, that they are putting themselves into danger. But as Kokichi calls for them, they go. Touching into Miyako’s dark, new mind, Alter Ego wearing the form of a lion, the Templar summoning his dogs, both of them ready to try to fight off the vines while they tried to, simultaneously, set up a defense.

There are hundreds of thousands of vines, reaching to touch down.

They know before they start they have lost.

They start to try anyway.

Kaito, finally getting the strength back in his legs, hurries over as the doctor cuts Miyako free of her umbilical cord, bringing her over to a blanket on a shelf as the other surgeons keep working on keeping Shuichi safe and starting the long process of closing him. The doctor is starting to clean her as Miyako wails her displeasure with this as well, and Kaito cannot stop grinning, and his heart is breaking because she sounds so frustrated, and he wants to give her every joy in the world. He wanted to calm her. He wanted to make her feel safe.

And Maki feels a heat well up inside of her.

She doesn’t know why. It’s a sudden tension in her chest. She’s not angry, but she feels like she’s prepping a furious breath. She feels like she might scream.

Something inside of her shifts.

And before Alter Ego and Templar can do anything. Before they can raise a single defense. As the first few vines landed, touching down, forming into the conscious presentations of the Flora the vines connected to…

A fire burned through the mind like an inferno.

Alter Ego and Templar both ducked. That was a generous way to describe it… both of them felt the burning, real heat of the fire above them, and collapsed, pure terror putting them onto their stomachs, covering their heads, holding their breaths. The fire raged through the edges of Miyako’s mind, creating a barrier that the second the vines grazed against it, spasmed and whipped away in panic, knowing death when they felt it.

The few Flora who had touched down first stared up in astonishment. Two of them didn’t know what they were looking at. The third, oldest one, knew what it was and couldn’t believe it. Not only what it was, but it’s familiarity…

“How.” The Flora said, staring at the Ancient Red Dragon. The Last Dragon of Luminary. “How?”

The Ancient Red Dragon looked at the Flora with disdain, the other two realizing what was happening as the third one shared his memories with them.

“Are you watching, Flora?” The dragon rumbled.

Thousands of miles away, Junko Enoshima scowled, staring at the eyes of the dragon through the three pieces of her that had managed to land… and she huffed in annoyance as the dragon struck out like a viper, swallowing the piece whole, his vine cut from the hive, destroyed forever. In the city below her palace, she heard her Flora scream in alarm, as the other two flora within Miyako abandoned the link, running for their lives, Miyako disconnected from them entirely.

...Damn.

Damn.

The dragon finished her paltry meal, before sighing, settling in and curling into herself, looking down at Alter Ego and Temp, expression familiar, if unconcerned. She said nothing to them. Her presence and purpose obvious enough by this point that she didn’t feel the need to reassure them, as she let out a little, heated breath…

And her whole body stilled, solidifying as she closed her eyes. A massive, red mountain lying in wait in Miyako’s mind. Undisturbing and un-influencing Miyako’s developing landscape… but always ready to unfurl. The Last Dragon of Luminary defending her territory once again.

“...holy shit lets get out of here.” Temp whispered.

“Don’t say shit in the baby’s mind.” Alter Ego answered, “...but yeah let’s go.”

All of this happened within a few seconds. It took longer to wash Miyako clean than it did to secure her mind from the hive.

And she was still crying and wailing and whimpering as the doctor wrapped her in a blanket, before instructing an eagerly waiting Kaito, “Remember, support her head and neck. Babies need a lot of support for a long time… congratulations.” the doctor smiled, passing her over to him, “Ten fingers, ten toes, very healthy lungs and vocal cords… she’s a perfectly healthy baby girl.”

Kaito might have tried to say something. He didn’t know. He was blubbering, his hands shaking as he took Miyako. She was so little. Her little face beat red as she screamed in his arms, weakly trying to escape her blanket, still very upset with this turn of events.

She was so small…

“...Miyako,” Kaito whispered, laughing as he realized his tears were dropping on her blanket. “Already making dad cry, huh? So mean… Miiiiiya… your names Miyako. I hope you like it… Miiiiiiiyaaaa~. Dad’s here Miya. Miyak~ooooo… Miiiiiyaaaa~.”

And after a moment, her crying quieted down. Miya’s golden eyes blinking tiredly open, a familiar sound grabbing her attention, as Kaito leaned down and gently kissed at her thin, purple hair. “Miiiiiiya… dad’s here. I’ve got you… I love you so much…”

“Miiiiiya~”

Kokichi doesn’t really know what he’s doing for a few minutes there. He’s in his dad’s arms, crying in happiness and terror, blubbering about how he hates himself for not being there, and how ecstatic he is that she’s alive. Fuck, she’s so unhappy, taken away from her nice warm spot, please let that be the extent of her unhappiness, please, please help her, help…

...and he calms, right as she does. Frustration and unhappiness ebbed away, calm and familiar enough that Kokichi doesn’t assume the worst.

...and...he doesn’t really...understand any of that.

But Ikuo holds him for a little longer and wipes his cheeks, and promises that today’s a good day, and that Kokichi will understand some day. And everything will be okay.

He woke up Tim as promised, but Kokichi was standing straight, drawn so tight it looked like he might shoot off into space, as he heard steps and wheels come down the hall.

Shuichi wasn’t awake yet, and wouldn’t be for some time, wheeled out on a gurney so that he could be taken to a med room for the night, and potentially another night after that, depending on how initial recovery looked. Kaito still sang his praises in his ear and kissed at his forehead every time Shuichi’s gurney was still enough to allow him too, Kaito himself allowed to carry Miyako, once the doctor had determined he knew how to hold her, though Miyako would eventually have to be laid out in her own little baby box, which would be next to Shuichi’s bed.

Shuichi and the healer got to the lobby first, the healer stopping and explaining where Shuichi was going, but clarifying quickly, “He’s perfectly fine, the procedure went flawlessly. It’s purely the drug coursing through his system keeping him asleep. You all can join him in his room, over at 4B, as soon as you like, but... “ she smiled, looking over her shoulder, “You have a guest on her way that I’m sure you’re excited to meet.”

Timothy watched in interest as he saw his mother hold open the door for his father, who was moving very, very slowly, and carefully, like he was afraid of even the slightest jostle… before grinning up at Kokichi, eyes wide and shiny. “Babe,” Kaito whispered, “Come meet Miyako.”

Still a little red-rimmed, Kokichi took in Shuuichi’s appearance quickly, the biggest thing standing out to him...Shuuichi looked peaceful. Not in pain, or too pale, or fading… Honestly like he was getting some of the best sleep he’d gotten in the past week.

Of course the lack of his huge baby belly was noticeable, but for Kokichi, seeing Shuuichi at ease and breathing and looking like he was comfortable… He had never seen what it was like at his own birth, obviously. But it was still an enormous relief.

Everything was fine. His family was fine.

...his family was plus one.

Kokichi looked over as Kaito called him, eyes fixed on the little bundle in his arms, and it felt like Kokichi barely blinked before he was at Kaito’s side, feet not even making a sound on the tile floor. He’d felt her, but this was Kokichi seeing his daughter for the very first time.

She seemed to be sleeping too, her scrunched little baby face soft and rosy and...breathing fine and alive and okay to be resting in her dad’s arms and--

Kokichi took in a sharp, shaky breath as his vision blurred from tears, an awed smile coming over his face. He quickly blinked, not wanting his vision to be obscured, taking in the plum purple wisps of hair and her lightly tanned skin.

“Hi, Miya…” Kokichi whispered, smile shaking. “I’m so happy to meet you...you’re incredible…”

He looked up at Kaito, fat tears rolling down his cheeks. “...she looks like you.”

“Do you think so?” Kaito grinned softly, wanting to lean in and kiss Kokichi’s tears away, but not daring to jostle the now resting Miyako, glancing over as Shuichi was wheeled away, “She opened her eyes for a little bit. She’s got bright gold eyes, maybe even a little brighter than Shuichi’s. She’s so beautiful, Kokichi…”

Kaito’s face suddenly scrunched up with emotion, chuckling lightly as he tried to catch his breath, “No, not again… I’ve been a mess for hours… god I can’t stop crying, it’s ridiculous…”

“He really can’t, and it really has been hours.” Maki informed them, running her hand gently through Tim’s hair, who was peeking at Miya from Maki’s side, his face curious. “This is your sister, Miyako, Timothy. She’s a responsibility. One day she’ll look at you for guidance and protection.”

Timothy nodded. “...I didn’t think babies looked like that.” He observed. “She’s so wrinkly.”

“She’s brand new, she’ll fill out with time.” Kaito chuckled, again looking up, his heart aching now that he couldn’t see Shuichi anymore. “Maki, you should take Timothy home at some point, but will you come check up on us in the morning?” he asked, “Kokichi and I are going to spend the night.”

“I’ll get the kids trained, pass them off to Haneda, and head over.” Maki agreed, “But let’s get you settled first. Tim, go grab the hospital bag from Ikou.”

Kaito looked over to Ikou and chuckled slightly, “Don’t be shy, come meet your grandaughter. Miyako, this is grandpa Ikou.” Kaito told her gently, not at all caring that Miya was far too fast asleep to even pretend at introductions, “And big brother Timothy, and our dog Chase, and you’ve already met Aunt Maki… everyone’s so excited to meet you, Miya. You’re so perfect…”

Bright golden eyes...she really was a combination of the three of them, then. Just...the three of them, but someone completely new and unique, all her own.

He couldn’t wait for Shuuichi to wake up.

Kokichi laughed softly and gently put one of his hands over Kaito’s arm, not quite touching or supporting Miya, but close. Being close to his daughter and husband because he couldn’t bear to be anywhere else.

Life moved on, but...for a little while, it could be just them.

“It’ll already be morning in a little bit,” Kokichi sniffed, feeling...another feeling, like he wanted to pull Maki into a tight hug and thank her until the end of time...but he could do that later, when he wasn’t looking at his daughter for the first few hours of her life, and...when he wasn’t going to make Maki want to give Kaito another earring.

Ikuo came over when invited, having not wanted to crowd the newborn and new parents, and when he did, looking at that tiny little lady with her soft, scrunched up wrinkly face… Immediately a shadow came over the man’s face, and Kokichi laughed softly, giving his dad a hug. “It’s okay, we’re all crying too.”

Fuck, was it morning already? Kaito had completely lost track of the time in there, and judging by Maki’s surprised expression, so had she. “What a long night.” He chuckled, looking fondly down at his daughter as he scolded, “Already disrupting our sleep, huh baby? Tsk. Such a mean little baby. No, no, I kid, I tease, you’re so perfect. Miyaaaaaa~”

“Okay… we won’t train.” Maki decided, “Tim, do you think you can stay awake for the day? If you go to sleep when we get home, you won’t sleep tonight.”

Tim shrugged, “I can stay awake.”

“Then I’ll make sure the girls get to the castle fine, I’ll inform Nadya of where you are, Kokichi, and I’ll come back to check on you all this afternoon.” She promised, before heading to where Shuichi had been wheeled off, “Now come on, I want to make sure you have everything you need before we go.”

“Aunt Maki is very bossy, Miya, but it’s only because she loves us so much. Yes she does. My little Miya,” Kaito coo’d softly, taking a step… before saying, “Do you wanna carry her babe?”

They were gonna be fucked. From this point onward, Kokichi just wasn’t going to be able to keep a sleep schedule. That was just fate. But it was worth it, for the little sleeping bundle in Kaito’s arms.

...could be in his arms…

Kokichi looked up at Kaito with wonder before nodding his head emphatically. It was perhaps a bit silly-looking with how he immediately relaxed his body afterward, becoming steady and gentle for his daughter. “Please… The day when I can’t pick her up anymore is sooner for me than it’ll be for you or Shuu-chan so...I wanna hold her while she’s still so little.”

Ever so gently reaching forward, Kokichi took the bundle from his husband, eyes sharp with attention to make sure he was supporting her head correctly and that she was secure...before he took a breath, his expression melting into the peak of paternal love.

Hands now free of Miya, Kaito laughed, now getting to steal all sorts of kisses, laying them on Kokichi’s forehead, temple, and cheek, before daring to steal a chaste kiss, knowing he was being selfish to try to draw his husbands eyes away from Miya for even a second, but wanting to do it anyway.

Timothy rolled his eyes at the far too much affection, before following his mother down the hall, bringing the bags with him, Chase at his heels. Kaito saying, “Alright, now, let’s go slowly… I’ve got the doors when we get there, slow, smooth steps… you’re so good, Kokichi, look at you, you’re a natural!”

Kokichi held still through Kaito’s affections, fond of them as always but more focused on the joy in his arms, snoozing away. She was so little...but firm and warm and he could hear her breaths this close up and...she was so alive. Even just sleeping, she was so alive…

A deep, deep love bloomed in Kokichi’s being, not demanding or rushing, but...flowing towards Miyako nonetheless. A love that she would never stop feeling from him.

(In the space of pretty metaphor, anyway.)

Walking with grace towards Shuuichi’s room, Kokichi murmured softly, not looking away from his daughter enough to make it obvious exactly who he was talking to. “A bunch of people came by… Stacy made food for us, it’s in the nice basket on the circle table… Denji-chan brought some blankets from home, and my father said that he got all the paperwork set for us...said that it tends to be a private thing anyway, so we can cite that before you want to make declarations about godparents publicly.”

“I saw Ikou grab that basket. That’s nice of all of them. I’m glad Denji came, I didn’t want you to be alone. I’m grateful Ikou sat with you too.” Kaito murmured, before chuckling, “Right, godparents… you, Shuichi and I should sit down and talk about that. I honestly hadn’t decided, but… I’ve been thinking of asking Maki… or maybe…”

Kaito didn’t know. He wished he could pick someone who would be steady and stable for Miya, during a time where something terrible enough that Miya had lost all three of her parents had happened… he just wished he trusted Maki to stay and raise Miya and Tim, and not go off to avenge them or something like that.

They’d talk it out. Maybe Kaito wasn’t giving Maki enough credit. Ikou was young, maybe they could ask him. Or, if they wanted to go wealth and status, there was always… Aiichi or Kaede or…

That didn’t feel right either.

They’d talk about it. For now, it didn’t matter. For now, Kaito just wanted to rest with his partners until Shuichi woke up, and Kaito and Kokichi could show off the results of all of Shuichi’s hard work to him.

Beautiful…. Perfect. She was perfect.

Miyako Saihara was perfect.

It was a dreamless sleep. No memories. No loop. No whim or whimsy or nonsense for Shuichi to mentally shuffle through in his quest to rest. Just a quiet, easy void.

And yet, he felt time pass.

It was a long sleep, and his mind knew that, long before he started to rouse. ‘I’ve been asleep for awhile,’ he knew, as little things started to come back. The sound of breathing. Footsteps behind closed doors. A rustling of wind through a tree near the window. He felt heat on his face, and as he blinked his eyes ever so slightly open, he felt a grip on his hand and a breath near it too, able to see Kaito’s still form silhouetted in the sunlight coming in from the afternoon sun behind him.

Kaito was gripping his hand, sitting on a chair but half laid out against Shuichi’s bed (bed? Where… was he?), sleeping partly against Shuichi’s clutched hand. Shuichi looked at him and the window behind him with equal confusion. He didn’t recognize the room, and he didn’t understand why Kaito wouldn’t be in bed with him.

Shuichi felt weird. Muffled. He was awake, but his head felt like it was filled with cotton. It was the sort of feeling where the only thing keeping him from just going back to sleep was that he was just… awake now.

Where was Kokichi?

Blinking slowly, it occurred to Shuichi he could move his head, so he gave that a try… oh. There he was. Kokichi was awake, standing next to a box, looking into it… he seemed happy with whatever was in the box. That was nice…

Shuichi saw Kokichi’s eyes glance up, catching his. “You seem happy…” Shuichi said softly, barely a murmur, “Did something good happen?”

Things had calmed down a lot since that morning. Kokichi had been reluctant to put Miya down, so while she did need to rest too...he still held her for a while longer as he, Kaito, and Ikuo settled into the room after Maki and Tim left. After her explosive entry into the world, well, something like that took a lot of energy for a little baby, and she had been sleeping since.

So had he and Kaito, actually, worn down from the adrenaline and tired from having woken up so early. It hadn’t been that long since Kokichi woke up himself, casting an amused glance to the afternoon sun--they were totally fucked--and talking quietly with Ikuo. Kokichi felt revitalized, and told his dad to get some rest...or at least take a break. Ikuo said he was going to get some food for them, making sure they had enough for whoever wanted lunch, filling out the food from Stacy that they’d already eaten.

And...in that quiet, warm space, Kokichi had gone to just...watch his daughter sleep. Admiring this new life that he would get to help nurture and protect and be in awe of as she grew… She would probably need a meal soon too...she’d be doing a lot of growing soon.

Just barely noticing movement out of the corner of his eye, Kokichi looked up, a warm look--somehow even more than the expression that had already been on his face--lighting up his features as he saw that Shuuichi was awake.

Still clearly out of it, but they’d been given a heads-up for that.

Grinning, Kokichi nodded and came over to Shuuichi’s side, holding his hand gently. “I’m incredibly happy--I think this is the best day of my life so far,” he murmured, stroking Shuuichi’s hand. “Something miraculous happened, Shuu-chan.”

After a moment, Kokichi tilted his head. “...how are you feeling? Do you want any water?”

That sounded good… it was nice seeing Kokichi so happy. Having a really good day. The best day, apparently.

The second Kokichi mentioned water, Shuichi realized his mouth tasted like old cotton. “Please.” He said, blinking slowly, his gaze going back to the box, “Water sounds good… I feel really… floaty.”

He kept staring at the box. A synapse kept firing, his brain trying over and over again to alert him about something. The box was definitely important. There was something important in the box.

“...” Shuichi blinked, “...I had a baby.” He remembered.

Leaning over to kiss Shuuichi’s head--he hadn’t been able to wear his hat for the surgery, obviously, and he and Kaito didn’t think it’d be very comfortable to wear in bed, but it was right in sight for Shuuichi on the nearest table--Kokichi went over to a closed top pitcher and poured a soft cup of water, soon returning to Shuuichi’s side. Taking a moment to offer it--as his partners always did for him even when they all knew he couldn’t use his arms well--Kokichi helped Shuuichi drink, supporting his head too.

And even with heavy duty drugs in his system, Shuuichi was not a mind to mess with.

Putting the cup to the side, Kokichi grinned. “You did. Shuu-chan was a total superhero. She’s sleeping--do you wanna see her?”

Shuichi gave Kokichi a puzzled look. For a moment, genuinely unable to understand what Kokichi was asking, because his brain hadn’t quite caught up with reality. He remembered he went to the hospital. They were going to do a C-section on him. It was all scary and painful and weird, right up until it wasn’t. Then he went to sleep. And he went to the hospital to have a baby. He had a baby.

But in Shuichi’s mind, none of that had quite yet equaled to actually having a baby. As a physical thing. He had just done the process. You couldn’t see the baby, the baby was still in his…

Shuichi glanced down at himself.

There was… considerably less of himself.

… Shuichi’s eyes widened as he realized Miyako was in the box.

He looked over at the box, and asked, his eyes suddenly reddening, “Is she okay? Is she healthy? Did I do it right?”

As Shuuichi looked at him with...not entire comprehension, Kokichi gave him a soft look and turned to get their daughter from her little bed. Shuuichi might not have enough strength to hold her just yet, but Kokichi didn’t want to keep him from getting to see her a moment longer. It really was a magical moment…

Turning back around with a bundle in his arms, Miya not stirring more than a sigh, Kokichi grinned back at Shuuichi as he carefully walked back to the bedside. “You were perfect, Shuu-chan. She’s perfect. The doctors said that everything went flawlessly, and she’s a perfectly healthy baby, a top ace in everything. Strong lungs, a strong heart, as many motor skills as she can have at this age…”

Kokichi very, very carefully half-sat on the edge of Shuuichi’s bed, leaning his arms and shoulders just so, so that Shuuichi had a full view of their daughter. “You two know each other very well, but...Shuu-chan? This is Miyako.”

Shuichi looked at her, stunned.

He still felt foggy, and not entirely in control of his limbs. His ams felt like weights, and it hadn’t occurred to him to try to move his legs yet, but if he had he would have the same problem there too. As he looked at Miyako, he tried to lift his head, and it still felt like his body was being held down by a very heavy blanket.

But even despite all of this, he started to try to move his arm up. Wanting to touch her. His eyes filling with tears as he whispered, “I had a baby… Miyako...”

His whole arm moved like a glacier and it was violently trembling by the time it got to its destination, but Shuichi brushed the edge of his pinky against Miyako’s cheek… and his eyes widened further as Miyako shifted in Kokichi’s arms, swallowing in her sleep before settling.

She was real.

She was really here.

“...I want to hold her.” Shuichi pled, knowing that was an unreasonable request as he let his arm drop, “...She’s healthy? You said she was healthy… I was so worried the drugs would hurt her…”

Kokichi felt his eyes start to water again as he watched Shuuichi take in all that was Miyako, pushing through the absolute exhaustion his body was in to touch her, to see for himself she was real and just as amazing as they had hoped. Even moreso, really.

Sniffling and trying to blink back his tears, Kokichi grinned. “You did such a good job with her, Shuu-chan. You took care of her amazingly… She’s fit as a fiddle… She has your eyes, you know? She’s been sleeping since Kai-chan brought her in, but he said her eyes are gold, just like yours…”

And speaking of their partner… Kokichi knew that Kaito would’ve wanted to see Shuuichi see their daughter for the first time, but they all really needed their rest. But...if Shuuichi wanted to hold her… There were a lot of things possible if you had accommodations.

Smiling gently at Shuuichi, Kokichi nodded. “Let’s wake up Kai-chan, and see if he can help you hold her.”

...in no way was Kokichi confident in holding Miyako with just one arm, so he carefully rounded the bed, gently nudging Kaito’s leg with his foot. “Kai-chan...Kai-chan, Shuu-chan’s awake.”

“She’s got your hair.” Shuichi realized, seeing that purple color grow more vibrant in the sunlight. Really taking her more in, the slightly squared shape of her chin, eyebrows that naturally laid lower towards the eyes, a strong nose, not to mention the slightly tan skin tone… she looked like Kaito. Kaito with purple hair and golden eyes…

“...she’s gonna be so tall.” Shuichi realized, “She’s gonna be Kaito-sized.”

And just like that, Shuichi could suddenly imagine a future with Miyako in it. Miyako would have broad shoulders and strong features. An expression that was naturally intense. But that expression would still be soft and friendly, because Kaito was going to teach her the secrets of how to negate ‘natural bitch face’, which was fine, because Shuichi would teach her how to look aloof when she needed it, and Maki would teach her how to look dangerous. And Kokichi wouldn’t go out of his way to show her what joy and laughter looked like, she’d pick it up naturally from him, seeing it when her daddy looked at her.

It was easy, to see it all now. Shuichi wondered why he had struggled so much with it for so long.

As Kaito’s foot was nudged, his eyes shot open, immediately up and looking around, looking around rapidly in alarm. Something had happened!? Something had--

Kaito absorbed what Kokichi had said, staring at Shuichi’s foggy gaze…

“You did it!” Kaito suddenly ‘shouted’, still very aware they were in a hospital and a sleepy baby was right next to him (look! Look! She was right there!) as he leaned over, taking Shuichi’s face and covering him in kisses, laughing as he said, “Shuichi! I love you so much! You did it! I’m so proud of you! Look! Look what you did!”

Shuichi watched Kaito’s high energy movement with baffled confusion as Kaito stood up, rapidly pointing and gesturing to Miyako in Kokichi’s arms, grinning wildly as he said, “Look! Look at her! She’s perfect! You did that! You made a whole person, Shuichi! She’s amazing! She has your eyes! She screams so loud! Kokichi, did you show him Miyako!? Look!”

She was going to be so tall. All the better to hold her as much as he could while he was able to. Miya had only been there for a few hours and already Kokichi was lamenting the day he went to pick her up and just...couldn’t anymore. From then on, he would have to settle for only hugs, which were nice, but...not the same. Not the same as the warm little bundle in his arms…

Laughing softly as Kaito sprung into excitement, Kokichi nodded and came closer. “I did. Shuu-chan made quite the charmer, huh? Do you think you could help him hold her, hun? It’s not fair that only we get to right now...Miya deserves to be held by all her dads.”

...speaking of dads, Aiichi would probably be coming by in the next few hours, but...they still had time to themselves. Kokichi didn’t think any of them had it in themselves to frown today, so… It’d be a fine visit. Shuuichi and Kaito would’ve said no if they had a problem with it.

“Wha?” Kaito looked over to Kokichi, looking down at Miyako (which he could do now! Because she was right there!) , then over at Shuichi… “Oh yeah, absolutely.” He grinned. “Let me just…”

Kaito looked Shuichi over, brows furrowing as he thought. Shuichi had just gone through a… very physical thing. Kaito would never tell Kokichi or Shuichi what a C-section actually, uh, looked like. But it had been… a lot. And Kaito wouldn’t want to hurt Shuichi trying to move him. Hmmm…

“Here, babe, let me see her… heeeey, Miiiiyaaaa~” Kaito said softly, carefully taking Miyako from Kokichi, again the baby shifting, but otherwise undisturbed, “Such a sleepy baby… such a little sleepy baby… she’s gonna be so hungry when she wakes up, but for now, so sleepy… okay!” He grinned, “Just trust me, handsome, I got you both.”

Sitting at the edge of the bed, Kaito looked at Shuichi, down to Miya, cupped carefully into both of his hands… she was so little...he carefully laid Miyako out against Shuichi’s arm and chest, placing her safely in the slightly dip from where his arm curved against himself, keeping her steady before, freeing one hand, he grabbed Shuichi’s other arm and placed it around Miyako’s back. Keeping one hand on Shuichi’s arm around Miya’s back, and the other adjusting the pillow behind Shuichi slightly, making it easier for Shuichi to tip and look down at her, as she slept against his shoulderblade…

“...Hello, Miyako.” Shuichi whispered, placing a soft kiss against the top of Miya’s head, sighing as he felt her weight against him. Her small breaths against his skin. “I’m your father… I love you… I’m so glad you’re okay…”

Kaito grinned, “Miyaaaa, this is dada! Be nice to dada, okay? He worked so hard for you. He did so much. We’re all very proud of him.”

“...still don’t know if I agree to ‘dada’.” Shuichi grumbled, hs body starting to relax. Blinking sleepily now, soothed by Miyako’s scent and heat. “She smells nice…”

“Dada thinks you smell good, Miya. Do you smell good? Got that new baby smell?” Kaito laughed, looking back at Kokichi, “It looks like Shuichi might fall back asleep soon. Did he eat anything? Drink?”

Kokichi knew he wasn’t going to be able to support both Shuuichi and Miyako, and while Shuuichi could be moved a little more than his heavy limbs could do on their own, he wasn’t supposed to sit up yet. But if there was someone who could support them both and give Shuuichi his first connection with their daughter, it was Kaito. And he did a marvelous job of it.

He thought back to all of Shuuichi’s insecurities about being a father and how he’d feel about Miya. His frightened declaration to have her, made to preserve his health. And while all those fears had been valid...seeing him now? Kokichi knew it. Shuuichi was going to be a wonderful father, someone that loved his child endlessly.

Kokichi watched them fondly, eyes glassy again, though he gave Kaito a nod without haziness. “He had some water, but he wanted to see Miya, so I didn’t ask about food. Doc said he might not have an appetite this early, still…”

Nodding to the door, Kokichi explained, “My dad’s getting us some food too. Told him to take a break when I woke up and that’s what he agreed to.” Even though Shuuichi might not really register much, Kokichi gave him a grin. “Nadya-chan and her boyfriend gifted you some candy-coated fruit, Shuu-chan, this really fancy stuff. I think you’ll really like it when you feel hungry.”

“That’s nice…” Shuichi said softly, his eyes becoming less focused every second, still just trying to look at Miyako. “Have some later… not hungry…”

Was Miyako hungry? Shuichi remembered something about Kaito saying she’d be hungry. If Shuichi fell asleep, they’d still feed Miya, right? Would Miya need to breastfeed? Shuichi had that weird nectar stuff in a bag at home, fresh from… yesterday? The day before? How long had he been asleep? “Don’t let Miya go hungry…” Shuichi insisted, blinking slower, “She’s so small… she needs to eat…”

“She’ll eat, I promise handsome.” Kaito grinned, keeping his voice low and soft, watching Shuichi start to fall back asleep, “She’s so beautiful, Shuichi… you did such a good job… we’ve got it from here. You can relax. Everything’s fine…”

“...hm…” Shuichi said indistinctly. Closing his eyes.

Kokichi watched fondly as Shuuichi drifted back off, already primarily concerned with Miyako. They had nectar stored and ready for her, and Dr. Tenchi had told them that formula would do her just fine as well, pleasantly surprised that they already knew that she would likely need more glucose than the average kid. There had been something...searching in her gaze for a moment, but...Kokichi may have been imagining things. It had been a stressful night.

A bit after Shuuichi fell asleep, Kaito taking Miyako back into his arms, Kokichi hummed. “What about you? We still have food from Stacchan, if you’re hungry now… Did you get enough sleep?”

“Heck no I didn’t.” Kaito grinned, staring adoringly down at Miyako as he leaned back to sit down at his chair again, his voice soft and happy as he said, “Dad feels like he’s been hit by a brick. I am… so tired already. Last night was a lot. Wasn’t it, Miya? Yes it was, it was so much, you were a big ol’ event, weren’t you? You were, yes you were…”

“But, I’m up now.” Kaito chuckled, looking happily over at Kokichi, “And food would probably help with the ‘run over by a carriage’ feeling. What about you? How are you, babe?”

Kokichi laughed softly and came to Kaito’s side, leaning gently against his shoulder as he looked down at Miya, still never going to get over that she was there!! She was right there, all little and perfect… “Already putting her own spins on our best laid plans. She wants to make sure alllll attention is on her, sweet Miya.”

Kissing Kaito’s cheek, Kokichi sighed happily. “...I’m good. Kinda tired but...not sleepy tired. I’ve been up for a little bit, been checking up on her...already hovering, you know? I…”

...he didn’t want to worry Kaito. But he didn’t want to keep secrets either.

Looking a little embarrassed, Kokichi placed another kiss on his husband’s temple. “...I kinda lost it, last night. Somehow...somehow it felt like I knew the second she took her first breath… And I don’t even know what was going through my mind...I was so happy and overjoyed and...scared, for some reason, but...that went away soon. And I just...knew that she was here.”

“...for some reason I feel like thanking Maki-chan?” Kokichi shrugged. “I mean, of course I’m happy she was in the delivery room with you guys but...I dunno. I feel like she did something incredible for Miyako.”

“Well, Maki definitely kept me from literally passing out, at one point.” Kaito chuckled, giving Kokichi a small, amused shrug, “Miya started crying and I swear, it was like a shock went through my whole body. I barely kept it together. It was all just quiet and, like… relatively normal? And then out of nowhere, swoop! There she was. Screaming her head off.”

“I wouldn’t be surprised if you heard her from the waiting room and that’s what set you off.” Kaito mused, feeling his stomach give a small, warning twitch and sighing, “And you’re so empathetic… maybe just hearing how freaked out she was made you feel like you were in danger? And, if Maki’s anything, she’s at least reassuring in a crisis… maybe you just felt better knowing she was nearby? Here, would you mind holding her while I go dig through that basket and see if there’s anything left?”

“Maybe, yeah…” Kokichi nodded, not really...thinking about it too hard. (He hadn’t spoken to Alter Ego or Temp yet. When he finally curled up in a chair to sleep, he had been so exhausted he couldn’t bring himself to search them out. After all...he hadn’t exactly been sleeping when Kaito woke him up in the first place, and pushing twenty-four hours without sleep, while a situation he may find himself in for Miya again, wasn’t something Kokichi could do easily anymore.)

Really...what mattered was that everything was okay. Shuuichi was fine, just resting and sleeping off the drugs in his system, Miya was healthy, and the first steps of their new lives was something he could breathe in.

Chuckling softly, Kokichi reached out to take Miyako back. “I’ll never mind holding her, and I don’t even care if saying that will make me a hypocrite later. ...I am a little surprised she’s been doing alright being passed between us so much; just a little sleepy darling…”

“Maybe we got really lucky and she takes after Shuichi, sleep wise.” Kaito sighed, stealing a quick kiss from Kokichi before heading over to the basket, digging into it and finding it, well… Stacy had done her best, but they had already gone through most everything solid she had packed. Kaito grabbed a bag of pretzels, and only thinking about its total lack of nutritional value a little, starting eating through them as he said, “Able to sleep through anything, hell or high water… Atua help us, seriously, if she takes after you babe.”

Snorting, Kaito shook his head, looking darkly amused as he said, “I don’t know what we’ll do if she’s a little night runner, like you. We’ll wake up one morning and she’ll just be gone. Having crawled away in her sleep somewhere, moving like the wind.”

While she was already asleep, Kokichi almost subconsciously swayed his body slowly back and forth. It wasn’t quite rocking her, but just the most subtle of movements meant to soothe.

Kokichi laughed softly, though there was a tinge of a groan in the back of his throat. “Oh man, so Temp and I went out to look at baby furniture a bunch, right? Apparently there’s a whole category of stuff meant just to keep babies and young toddlers in their cribs. All sorts of nets and high walls and clasps… Aww...Miya, are you gonna be a magician baby? You’re gonna worry us to death…”

“I’ll be hoping for a Shuu-chan sleep-style,” he nodded. Then, he gave Kaito a sly look. “...Shuu-chan said that she’s gonna be tall like you, too. I think he agrees that she takes after you in looks a lot.”

Kaito, with far too many pretzels in his mouth, gave a little curious, “Hm?” sound, peering at Miya in Kokichi’s slightly swaying form, Miya looking entirely calm and comfortable in his grip. “Hmmm…” Swallowing, Kaito laughed, “Maybe a little around the eyes. You’ll see what I mean when she opens them, she didn’t get your super cute ‘half of your face’ size eyes, and she didn’t get Shuichi’s slant and lids… so yeah, maybe a little in eye shape. And…” Kaito chuckled, putting his hand up and comparing his skin to hers, “Definitely in coloring. But I think she’s just such a little mix of you and Shuichi. I already see so much of you in her… which I love, by the way. I was really hoping she’d look a lot like you two, and I feel like I got my wish.”

The truth was, Kaito was reaching when he said he thought he saw some of his eyes in her. It was true she didn’t really have eyes like Shuichi or Kokichi, in shape, but… he just didn’t see Miyako’s resemblance to himself.

(Which…)

(Good.)

“I think she already looks like a strong little baby.” Kaito grinned, “Like, for being, what… not even twenty hours old yet? I could see her lifting weights. Running a few miles, no sweat. Our little buff baby.”

“I know we’re gonna end up relishing when she’s asleep, but man, there’s a part of me that wants her to wake up.” Kaito admitted, laughing at himself a little, “I can’t wait for you to see her eyes, babe. She’s so beautiful. It’s breathtaking. And I don’t even think it’s my bias saying she’s gorgeous, I think she just is.”

Kokichi nodded acceptingly, but...well, he honestly just thought it was Kaito’s goggles getting in the way. Miya was a cute little baby, and Kaito fought back against every time Kokichi ever called him cute, so...it seemed natural that he wouldn’t really see much of how she resembled him.

But in fairness, how much Kokichi could see it was bias too. There were some things you could definitely see in a baby, and no parent would ever admit it, but...babies were soft and squishy and wrinkled and kind of all looked the same, when it came to their features. She would have to grow up a bit for them to really see what sort of features she’d gotten from where. And there was even a chance that they wouldn’t really be able to recognize any of them.

Snorting, Kokichi rolled his eyes a little. “I can’t believe I even have wider eyes than a newborn baby. It’s ridiculous.”

He shook his head. “She’s the most beautiful, perfect person I’ve ever seen, Kai-chan. It’s amazing I haven’t started crying again,” Never mind that he had just been crying a little bit ago, seeing Miya and Shuuichi together, “But I’ll start up again when I see her eyes for the first time because I’ll be hit all over again by how wonderful she is. So embarrassing, the first time Miya sees her daddy and it’ll be with me in tears… She will never take me seriously.”

“Pfff, trust me babe, I wasn’t any better. I literally cried on her little blanket wrap. I was a mess. Shuichi’s half drugged and just went through a major surgery and cried less than the both of us.” Kaito chuckled, shaking his head, “She’s gonna figure out which of her parents are softies in no time. Hopefully she doesn’t figure out who among us are pushovers any time soon.”

Kaito, feeling a little better full of pretzels, sighed, leaning back and watching Kokichi with Miya, “...you’re so beautiful too.” Kaito said softly, “Look at you… how did I get so lucky…”

“...the kings going to be here soon, isn’t he.” Kaito murmured, running his hand through his wild hair, pushing it back a little, dressed in the clothes Ikou had brought but otherwise looking unusually messy without any of his prep or products. “...I haven’t picked godparents. I have no idea who to pick.”

Kokichi joined in with Kaito’s laugh, affectionately stroking a finger down the length of Miyako’s body--how much he could reach without moving his wrist much, anyway. She was going to have an easy time figuring them out. Which was good. The last thing he wanted for her was to leave her guessing, not knowing who her parents were as people, or even who they were to her. He wanted to be open, to have her know exactly what to expect.

Even if that meant her knowing exactly who to ask to get what she wanted. Kokichi could handle having a bunch of talks about boundaries with her, if it meant she was comfortable with them.

Giving Kaito a loving look, Kokichi’s eyes drifted down to Miya as he then took a seat too, letting his arms rest just a little as he braced them on his knees. “...in a bit, yeah. He said he’d be here mid-to-late afternoon...wanted to give us time to rest up. He has her birth certificate and paper announcement and international announcement all drafted up already...wanted to give us final say, though it’s all gonna be generic stuff just saying her name and the day she’s born.”

“...in Dicean law and tradition and all that...the people who would look after Miya outside of us is private information. So...it’s not gonna be in the international announcement. We have time to talk about it before we tell people ourselves…”

Kokichi looked at his daughter, her perfect little face. He didn’t want to think of a world where he couldn’t raise her himself.

“...I know it’s a big deal in Luminary politics. So...I’ll defer to you. But...if something happened to us… I...I’d prefer if someone wasn’t going to take her out of the country…”

“...Yeah.” Kaito said simply, giving Miyako a slightly dimmed look, “Agreed. She’s a Dicean, no one has any business taking her anywhere else. No one’s ever going to make her move somewhere far away and strange, so long as I have a say in it. And right now, I do.”

“I just want… her to have a quiet, simple life. I’d trust Maki with her life, but not with its simplicity. Tim’s got two devoted parents, but one of them is not capable of really just… settling down. Maki’s life is always going to be weird.” Kaito sighed, running his hands over his face, “...Aiichi would be too simple. She’d end up being raised by the castle staff, like you were. I’m not fond of that idea either…”

“...there’s Ikou… but…” Kaito frowned, not wanting to say that Ikou’s life choices made him nervous to trust him with Miya. “...well, he’s an option. If you have any thoughts?”

Kokichi let out a small sigh. It was...sort of relief, but it hadn’t been something he’d been stressing over a lot. But between Kaito’s ideas of legacy and how much the bonds of being a godparent meant in Luminary...he had been worried that Kaito would want to choose someone from Luminary, just for security in another country. That it would be a factor to weigh in the decision.

But...ultimately, they all wanted the same thing for Miya--a happy, safe life unlike the ones they had. Miya would have respect of her personhood, she would have the care and attention of her family, she would be given the space to grow into who she was meant to be, or whoever she wanted to be. They were going to ensure that as much as they could.

Looking up as Kaito ran through candidates that he wasn’t sold on, Kokichi nodded slightly. He had good points on Maki and Aiichi, and...Kokichi was more than okay asking Ikuo to be Miyako’s grandfather, and he was pretty pleased with him being an involved one. But...Kokichi didn’t want to ask him to fully raise her, even as just a worse-case scenario. Ikuo was already giving so much of his life to them.

Kokichi sighed softly. “...I realize it’s not an option for you, and I respect that. But...if something happened to me, and I was deciding this on my own? I trust my sister and Nazumi with everything. I would rest easy, knowing Miya would be taken care of and cherished.”

(...there was another option, but...at the same time, it wasn’t an option at all. Kokichi was already trusting Alter Ego with Miya’s life. He trusted his friend with so much of himself too…

...but it wasn’t even the difficulty of moving to another country. Alter Ego just...wouldn’t be able to be there physically, even if Hiro was somehow able to let them act through him. It just...wasn’t possible.)

Kaito had thought Kokichi might bring them up.

He started to massage his joints, giving Kokichi a concerned look. Before looking down between his knees, staring at the floor…

“...they… live in a nice place.” Kaito agreed, wringing his hands, “Nearby, where Miya will know everything. Worse case scenario, her life won’t change too dramatically…”

“...I don’t… really know the full story.” Kaito admitted, sighing as he looked up at Miyako, before giving Kokichi an uncertain look. “Do you trust Nazumi?”

Kokichi sighed a little louder now, giving his husband a knowing look. “...I did say I know they’re not in contention, hun. It’s not gonna break my heart, and I know that you and Shuu-chan don’t trust them. I’d feel better with us all being able to agree on someone.”

“...but I do,” Kokichi said softly, eyes serious. “I really don’t think she and Lake give themselves enough credit. What Nazumi did was more than just an understandable mistake...but she got help. And she’s been putting in the work to be a better, healthier person ever since I first met her.”

Kokichi huffed softly. “...the two of them act like the world is gonna explode if they admit to each other that they like each other. And I get why they’re wary...ironically, they love each other too much to want to risk that relationship. But...they’d be just fine if they did, I know it.”

“...Aunty’s not a danger to anyone she loves. Not anymore.”

Kaito rubbed his knuckled… “I don’t mean to not trust your family, Kokichi.” He said softly, something genuinely apologetic in his tone. “Everyone scares me. All the time.”

And he hadn’t thought he was going to say that, until it was out of his mouth. And he hadn’t known it was true, until he said it. But it was. Everyone scared him. Back in Luminary, here in Dicea… Kaito was scared all the time. He was constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop. To end up on damage control, or on the defensive, or just… waiting for everything to explode. People were only nice if you made them happy…

“I don’t want that for Miya.” He said softly, looking at his daughter. “I hope she doesn’t grow up to be scared…”

Kaito sighed, rubbing the back of his neck, as he said, “I can understand being slow to trust yourself, after you’ve done something terrible. If that’s all their… ‘thing’ is? Them just being overly cautious? That’s… not a bad thing. Lake is nice, friendly, a guardsman. Nazumi has always been very friendly, even when she was gonna hit us with that shovel. Nazumi’s really responsible as your bodyguard. They’ve been together for a long time, they have a nice place to live… they’re not bad choices… do you think they’d want too?”

Kokichi nodded sadly, though...Kaito added new perspective. Kokichi’s family was different, so he understood being wary of that. Trust was only earned after years and years or after extreme hardship, often a combination of the two, and Kokichi’s family just...didn’t have that with Kaito.

...but it wasn’t just Kokichi’s family. It was...everyone?

...it was everyone.

Kokichi looked at their daughter, her peaceful, innocent face. “...I hope monsters in her closet are the only things she’s scared of. That no one gives her a reason to doubt people’s motives, even if we’ll teach her caution. I want the world to be beautiful to her…”

And he knew it was important to see the scary things, too. But not while she was a child. He never wanted it to be a sudden, traumatizing awakening for her.

...Lake and Nazumi were two people who had seen it early. Were two people who knew how it felt and so...would want to make the world beautiful still to a girl who had just lost all three of her parents.

Kokichi hugged his daughter a little closer, her face scrunching up in sleep slightly.

“...Lake-nee adores kids, you know? There’s a reason she’s the one always going to schools to teach about the guardforce. And she and Aunty are so excited to be aunts…” Kokichi looked up and nodded at a bag among the rest of the gifts around the room. “They wanted to make it a birthday surprise for her… They made a mobile, it almost looks like sculpted glass...I think it’s plastic, though. It’s all sorts of cactus flowers.”

Kaito smiled at that. “Cacti flower, huh? Aw… that’s sweet.”

Maybe Lake and Nazumi were the good choice here, then. Shuichi said Nazumi’s incident, whatever it had been, hadn’t happened since she was a teenager. Maki had trusted her to be Kokichi’s bodyguard. And Lake didn’t seem entirely crazy, to want to be with… well, a monster.

Yeah… maybe they’d be the right choice then.

“We’ll talk to Shuichi about it, before we make any final decisions.” Kaito decided, glancing at their sleeping boyfriend, “Like you said, we don’t have to tell anyone. Luminary might want to know, but...we’re not Luminary’s business. All Kaede’s ever going to want from us is to make certain Miya gives up her claim someday. We don’t really matter anymore to them.”

Kaito was… basically okay with that.

He was getting used to it, anyway.

It was much better to focus on what was immediately around him, especially right now. Shuichi fast asleep and healing, Kokichi with their baby in his arms, Timothy at home with Maki and likely taking advantage of Kaito being out of the castle to go look at Nini. It was a great day. Kaito was tired and a little overwhelmed and nervous about the immediate future of keeping Miya alive and safe and happy and it was a fantastic day.

Speaking… Kaito got up, heading over to Kokichi and, taking his head in his hands, giving him a lingering, thankful kiss against his forehead.

“You were amazing last night.” Kaito said, “All of that was scary as shit. I’m really proud of how you handled it. You were perfect.”

Kokichi nodded, not wanting to make a decision without Shuuichi anyway--they were going to be forgiven for not totally being on their shit for a while, so they had plenty of time to talk it over. Though, he gave Kaito a long, searching look.

...things had changed a lot. He knew things had changed from Kaito’s adoration of his cousin the moment Kokichi told him she was planning a coup, but...his worries about Luminary too. There had been so many times where Kaito had been fretting over what people in Luminary would think about so many things, and now to just...be so distanced from it… It was something Shuuichi had really wanted for Kaito, Kokichi knew.

He supposed it was different when the prime people Kaito had worried about weren’t...there anymore.

...as long as Kaito was okay with it then...like with everything, Kokichi would support him. He gave Kaito a soft nod before his husband got up.

Smiling as Kaito kissed his head, Kokichi let out a quiet huff of a laugh. “Yeah? I feel like I was a nervous wreck, even before breaking down in the waiting room… Kai-chan felt like he was really on his shit, being reassuring for Shuu-chan and making sure everyone was where they needed to be.”

“‘Kai-chan’ got freaking tunnel vision and can barely remember what he said or did.” Kaito huffed, placing another long kiss against Kokichi’s temple, just enjoying touching his husband, listening to Miyako’s soft baby breaths. “I’ve been scared plenty of times, but I think that was the longest, like, sustained moment of pure panic I’ve ever had.”

Kaito laughed at himself a little, resting his head against Kokichi’s as he dipped his shoulders down, looking down at Miyako as he coo’d, “You’re the scariest thing I’ve ever done… so mean to dad already… couldn’t have waited three whole days, huh Miya? We had a whole plan... had to give us all metaphorical heart attacks. Can’t be doing that, baby, daddy’s heart needs a lot of taking care of, and dada holds a grudge.” Kaito chuckled, lighting petting a finger down Miyako’s blanket. “...I’m so happy she has your hair… I think she’s gonna lose it soon, but I’m gonna love watching it grow back in.”

“You’ve always been someone to count on under a lot of pressure,” Kokichi hummed, enjoying having Kaito so close. Kaito leaning against him, Miyako in his arms...it was almost perfect. Shuuichi just had to be leaning against his other side and Kokichi would say he was in the best position he could be.

He looked down at their daughter fondly as Kaito gently chastised her, laughing after a moment. “I think she’s gonna be the cause of the scariest things we do for a long time. And she’s not even gonna do it on purpose...ultimate prankster right from the start. She’s already outclassed me.”

Kokichi shifted his arms slightly, making sure his hold was secure still. “...I suppose it’s still unknown if she got my hair texture too--I’m still hoping for Shuu-chan’s. I don’t have it in me to wrangle her down for brush-time, even if I’m conceding that she needs it. If she can have magic hair that never tangles, all the better.”

“Okay, but no really, he has to be fu--” Kaito hesitated, glancing at Miya, “He has to be screwing around with us. There’s no way he doesn’t do anything to his hair. It’s an elaborate joke he’s been playing on me for years and I just… haven't caught him in the act yet.”

The weird thing about being Kaito was that he knew, at least half of the time, when he was being deliberately fucked with, and because he was an ‘in on the joke’ personality type, he didn’t mind leaning into it when he noticed. The problem was, he was just self aware enough to know that the other half of the time, the joke was flying right over his head, and… he had no idea when it was or wasn’t happening. It could get a little… ‘disorienting’ was a fair word. Especially because his habit of leaning in when he noticed encouraged his friends to fuck with him, and Kaito sometimes had to pretend he had noticed the joke when he realized what was happening too late…

Kaito sighed, kissing Kokichi again, “She’s still dead asleep. Let’s put Miya down, you come curl up with me, get some rest while you can still get it.”

Kokichi snorted, noticing Kaito’s self-censorship. It was probably a good idea to get into the habit since it would make it easier when it mattered more, but he still found it funny. Miya would barely be able to distinguish sound at all, and still Kaito wouldn’t swear around her.

He wondered who would teach her creative swear words first. Tim? Someone at school? Would Kokichi cave and have it be something fun between them?

“I really think he’s the type that can get away with just running his fingers through to make himself presentable,” Kokichi sighed. “It’s just so straight and silky that, yeah, combing helps, but he doesn’t need it, so he uses that to his advantage. And it’s not like he forgoes showers a lot, so his hair doesn’t have time to get greasy. Some people just have all the luck…”

Sighing, Kokichi looked down at their snoozing daughter. She really had barely stirred, and he knew he’d appreciate the rest later… Pouting, he carefully got up to lay her down in her little crib. “...I never wanna put her down… I feel like I’m gonna be doing constant weight training.”

“Yeah, well, that’s the secret.” Kaito chuckled, watching Kokichi put her down before wrapping his arms around Kokichi’s waist, kissing at his cheek and holding him from behind, looking at Miya over Kokichi’s head as she slept in her hospital crib. “Training is worthless without rest. Our muscles heal and reform while we sleep. Training with no sleep? Leads to nothing but lost effort.”

“Now, come on, daddy, come rest with me.” Kaito sighed, walking backwards in a careful rhythm, pulling Kokichi with him back to one of the chairs and pulling him into his lap as he sat down, “My strong, badass ‘Kichi… don’t worry, you won’t sleep long. Someone’s gonna interrupt soon no doubt.”

Kokichi snorted and let himself be pulled backwards, trusting Miya to her sleep for the time being. She’ll wake up soon enough and start demanding the world from them, but for now...they all need rest.

Curling up in Kaito’s lap, Kokichi sighed and let himself get comfortable, nuzzling in against Kaito’s chest after making sure to pay his husband back for all the cheek kisses. “I don’t feel so weird about you calling me ‘daddy’ like this,” he hummed.

“...if Ikuo comes back, you can let me sleep. I’ve never seen him almost match me in workaholic tendencies… But I can save you from awkwardness if Aiichi comes by. Until then...I’ll be resting up so I can lift our daughter for longer.”

It was still a good chunk of peace before there was a soft knock on the door, Aiichi just barely peeking his head in to see if any of the occupants were awake. Ikuo nodded to him briefly, and Aiichi caught sight of Ko curled up in Kaito’s lap, Kaito definitely awake. Waving, Aiichi silently asked permission to enter, not wanting to wake anyone up unnecessarily.

Kaito and Ikou had been chatting quietly about nothing much, really. Kaito had thanked Ikou again for packing the extra clothes and letting Maki pull him from his room in the middle of the night, and Ikou had made Kaito laugh lightly as he explained Maki’s insistence that they parkour from floor to floor. “Yeah, that was probably my bad.” Kaito had said quietly, holding Kokichi close to him as his husband snuffled against the dip of his neck, “I had this awful image in my head of ‘Kichi just… waiting alone… I think I asked Maki to hurry. Probably gave her some unreasonable time limit, if she was moving that fast.”

Kaito genuinely couldn’t remember for certain. It had all happened in a blur of panic. Kaito at the moment could mostly clearly remember Shuichi clutching around his neck in panic and Kaito’s own haggard breathing blasting in his ears.

Phew… what a night.

Kaito’s eyes widened slightly when Aiichi came in (Get up you have to bow) but was too trapped beneath Kokichi to do too many of his normal formalities. What had Kokichi said… he had asked to be woken up when the king came by, right? Kaito wanted to let Kokichi sleep, but not at the expense of ignoring a direct request from his husband. So, instead he gave a respectful bow of his head to the king, before whispering into Kokichi’s ear, “Babe, your fathers here… ‘Kichi…”

Aiichi came into the room proper, holding a folder of papers under one arm and a basket in the other, though by the face he quirked a smile at some of the food already in the room, it could be easily surmised that the king had followed in a common custom of Dicea and brought food too. Hopefully they were hungry!

Groaning softly--oh fuck, he’d needed that sleep--Kokichi slowly woke up, stretching as much as he could while still in Kaito’s lap before slumping with a sigh, turning to see his father. “Hey…”

“Hey,” Aiichi said more brightly, though still soft, looking over the three dads. “I don’t mean to disturb--it’s been a busy night. I’m glad you all are doing well.” Lifting the basket, Aiichi set it over with some of the other food, giving his offerings. “It looks like you’re all set, but I believe Chako would’ve insisted I bring these over even if I hadn’t intended to bring food. There’s tomato soup in the thermos and the sweet buns should still be warm--they were fresh out of the oven when I left.”

Kokichi rolled his eyes and squirmed out of Kaito’s lap, taking the folder from Aiichi and dragging him over to the hospital crib by his sleeve, knowing that his father was too polite to demand to see his granddaughter like he wanted.

Kaito’s eyes brightened at the mention that Chako had sent food, after Kokichi escaping him Kaito hungrily zeroing in on the basket. Sweet buns…

Eagerly and immediately taking one of the sweet buns (yesssss… still warm. Thank you Chako!) Kaito offered another to Ikou as he munched, eyes following Kokichi and Aiichi to the crib. Kaito wondered what kind of grandfather Aiichi would make, if he made one at all. Maybe having a baby around would bring out a side to the man Kaito hadn’t seen before… he wasn’t holding out a lot of hope though.

His eyes went to the folder in the kings arms-- ah, right. The paperwork. Kokichi would probably wanna take care of that, even if Kaito was curious to look. Hmm… Kaito suddenly looked around, a new thought occurring to him.

Queen Miyako had probably died here, huh. At least at this hospital. Kaito couldn’t imagine what that would be like, and that was even while trying. He glanced over at Shuichi and felt his stomach tighten. Kaito wondered what special kind of crazy, he would have gone, if things had gone worse last night…

It wasn’t the first time Kaito had wondered what that day had been like or Aiichi, but admittedly, it was the first time he had wondered it while not actively resentful of the king. Between Aiichi’s strange personality, Kaito’s belief in Kokichi’s abusive history, and Kaito’s belief in ‘Kokichi’s’ philosophy that the country always came before the well-being of his family, Kaito remembered bitterly wondering if Aiichi had even taken the day off for the death of his wife and the birth of his son. If any of it had even really mattered to him. A cruel thought, but a part of him had really wondered.

Kaito suspected he knew better now. And he couldn’t even imagine going through a day that bad. Not without losing his mind.

She’s so little.

Kokichi heard a little puff of air from his father, and without thinking he half-hugged him, Aiichi putting an arm around his shoulders too. The man radiated pride and awe, rubbing a gentle circle into Kokichi’s arm.

“She’s lovely,” Aiichi said, his voice heavy.

She was so little, but Kokichi had been smaller. Paler, and not just from skin tone. But...Aiichi didn’t feel like there was a film over his eyes, overlaying what had been his constant fear for years and blocking him from seeing what was actually in front of him. Instead, he saw a sleeping little girl with a scrunched in tan face and wisps of plum purple hair.

Aiichi laughed softly, holding Kokichi closer, and Kokichi doing the same. “I had no idea what hair color you had for ages, you know? I’m pretty sure someone opened up a betting pool at one point--I never knew my parents, so anything was on the board. ...your color fits her. What color are her eyes?”

“Gold, like Shuu-chan,” Kokichi murmured back, though for the first time it occurred to him that he doesn’t know if it’s really like Shuuichi...or like Aiichi’s. “Or so I’m told. Kai-chan’s been the only person to see her awake yet.”

Aiichi laughed again. “Gold eyes...she’s really a combination of all of you.”

“The healers said they’d both probably be exhausted for awhile.” Kaito piped up from the chair, now sipping at some of the tomato juice (fuck he was starving, warm food had woken up his appetite), “But I keep waiting for Miya to get hungry on us. I think me and Kokichi are straight up going to fight over who gets to feed her first.”

Finishing his bun with a sigh, Kaito grinned cheekily at Kokichi, “Gonna throw you over my shoulder and you can just watch me feed her the nectar… man, now that she’s actually here?” Kaito frowned, glancing at the crib, “That is a weird thing to say aloud. Feed the baby ‘nectar’... who coined that again? Was it Seiko who called it that? I feel like you shouldn’t feed a person ‘nectar’.”

Kokichi turned and stuck out his tongue at Kaito, though he pulled up another chair by one of the tables, seating himself by Miya and pulling Aiichi across to sit at the other side of the table. “We could always do it together, you know? You don’t have to play dirty for something as important as that.”

As Kokichi dug into a bun himself--there were other containers of food in the basket, it looked like, but no one was ever going to say no to sweet buns--Aiichi slung one of his legs up to rest his foot on the opposite knee, subtly taking up less space in the room. “There are records of an ancient drink called nectar. It was said to be the finest concoction in the universe, a secret recipe that humans only got from the gods, and so was made primarily to be offered up as divine offering.”

Aiichi grinned with a shrug. “Not the same thing, but there is something nice about the thought of feeding your daughter a drink of the gods.”

Kokichi groaned into his bun. “You’re such a dooooooork.”

Kaito, briefly, had to strongly fight the urge to say something inappropriate about it making sense to him that something divine could be tasted off of Shuichi, his eyes moving with sudden intense interest at Shuichi… before his ears reddened in embarrassment at himself. Come on, man, you’re surrounded by your in-laws and Shuichi just had a baby, of whom is right over there. Even now?? You’re still horny even now?? Ridiculous.

“Miyako’s going to have a bit of a sweet tooth.” Kaito said, shaking his head a little, trying to get his head off of Shuichi, and how handsome he was, and how much Kaito liked too-- stop. “We’ve managed to dig up some info of other people born to poppy-based pregnancies, and apparently one of the side effects is needing extra glucose in their diet. Apparently that’s why she needs the nectar instead of just normal formula or milk. Also, we lucked out on her getting some of my darker complexion, cause we were warned she might end up being a little sun-seeker, I’m guessing ‘cause poppy-babies are a little chillier. Miyako and Kokichi are both going to be little heat leeches…”

“Oh!” Kaito said, eyes suddenly widening, looking between Ikou and Aiichi, “I have to know and I’ve never really had an opportunity to ask… did Kokichi sleep walk as a kid? ‘Cause he’s a really active sleeper, and while I’ve only seen him actually walk while asleep once, we should probably keep an eye out for it in Miya if it was more common when he was smaller.”

That was his excuse to ask, but really, Kaito was just digging for cute little Kokichi stories from the two people in his life who might actually know some.

Ikuo had already heard the rundown of Miyako peculiarities, but this was the first time Aiichi was hearing about it and he perked up, as ever the back of his mind running away with this new information. If there were common physiological traits children born from parents who had been on the poppies, then...that should be public health information, shouldn’t it. Parents deserved to have all the knowledge to make sure their children were safe and healthy.

...but even Aiichi knew that this wasn’t the time to discuss the creation of pamphlets and such, even if there were official matters to talk about later.

Smiling fondly at Kaito’s comparison of Miyako and Kokichi both seeking out warmth, Aiichi raised his eyebrows a bit when Kaito asked for stories of Kokichi’s childhood. For a moment, he and Ikuo exchanged a glance, knowing that Kokichi hadn’t been going much of anywhere as a small child, but...there were still stories to tell.

“Not while he was little, no,” Aiichi started, relaxed again from that moment of tension. “Ko was actually quite a heavy sleeper when he was a toddler, though if he got something in his hands it wasn’t going anywhere until he woke up,” the king said with a laugh, amused more by Kokichi’s sigh.

“Weren’t so much sleepwalkin’ when he was a li’l older either,” Ikuo hummed. “‘Stead, ‘Kich’ was more likely ta go out walkin’ ‘round on his own terms in the mi’l of th’ night. Di’ few times pat ‘round fer extra blankets ta nestle in, though, an’ ‘e seemed pre’ asleep. If Miya takes after him tha’ way, might just be a good call ta keep extra blankets ‘n critters by her so she won’t ha’f ta go out lookin’.”

Kaito nodded at that, “Got it, got it…” Scratching at his chin, an old memory poking at him that still made a shudder of guilt and anxiety run through him, but in the context of things Miya might need… “What about eating stuff in his sleep? Was there ever anything like that you had to look out for? Kokichi will sometimes just chew on things, ya know? Ever any emergencies from that?”

Both Aiichi and Ikuo just stared at Kaito for a moment while Kokichi sank down in his seat, covering his flushing face.

“‘Mergencies, nah, but I di’n know ‘bout th’ chewin’ either.”

Nodding along with Ikuo, Aiichi explained, “Of course he went through teething, but I never noticed Ko eating anything in his sleep. Granted…” The leader’s voice took a more regretful turn as he glanced to his son. “In later years, any reason for someone to spend the night meant that Ko wasn’t exactly in a state to do much of anything in his sleep.”

Kokichi sighed and ran a hand down his face. “That’s not something we’ll have to worry about with Miya, though. So...there’s nothing really drastic we’ll have to worry about, it sounds like.”

Ikuo shrugged. “If we’re basin’ it off ‘a you.”

“I mean, when it comes to ‘baby’ stuff, we don’t have a… ton of other examples to go off of.” Kaito shrugged, “I mean, beyond reading a thousand facts in baby books. It’s not like any of us remember what it was like for us personally, and unless ‘Kichi has a secret history of babysitting that I’m unaware of…?” Kaito grinned at Kokichi, leaving a pause for his husband to fill in and just snickering at the look he was given instead, “Then I’m afraid you two are… kinda literally the only two people we can ask for real world advice on the subject, Kokichi our entire sample size.”

What were they going to do? Ask Kaito’s parents?

Ha ha ha ha ha-- man, Kaito was tired. Sleeping in the chairs throughout the day hadn’t been terribly restful. But that was okay. Maybe they’d get lucky and Miya would mostly wanna sleep through the night too.

Also, man, Kokichi really hadn’t been a chewer as a kid? Kaito still sometimes woke up with Kokichi nibbling on him. Not often, a handful of times, but his husband very clearly just dreamed about eating things in his sleep sometimes. Thankfully the little leech hadn’t managed to ever grab his nipple again. (Another brief shudder of guilt.)

“Extra blankets for when she gets old enough to hunt for them, hopefully no issues with chewing up her pillows-- though that one still felt up in the air to Kaito-- and… hmmm… what else… Kaito looked quietly to Kokichi, a small shrug. “Man, I don’t know what else to ask though. I feel like I’ll probably have more questions a week from now, when I realize how out of our depth we are.”

Kokichi rolled his eyes a bit at Kaito’s sort of joke, but he did have a point. There were likely going to be things about Miya that they wouldn’t be able to predict, but when it came to the stuff they could get an idea about beforehand...his own history was the best place to look. Even if a lot of it wouldn’t apply to Miya in the slightest.

There was a regretful look in Aiichi’s eyes, but he shrugged gently. “In my own experience, you never truly stop learning. But I’ll be willing to share a story or three wherever it’s applicable”

“Ya got a lotta people ta help out,” Ikuo nodded in agreement. However...there was something he was holding back. But you had to be careful talking about that kind of stuff, and now was not the time to discuss fuzzy heads and charmed animals. Kokichi still seemed horribly confused and conflicted about the whole thing so...soon. Just a little more time.

Looking over at his son, there was a glimmer of a smile on Ikuo’s face. “Took a bi’ ta start up, but’cha used ta babble in yer sleep a lot. Always thought it was ya gettin’ fussy fer a change ‘er somethin’ but nah, ya just wanted ta talk.”

Kokichi’s flush came back and he covered his face again with a groan.

Kaito grinned. Cute… Kaito supposed a day like this might come someday with Miya too. Telling people childhood stories about her, watching her fluster and whine. Aw…

If they could have, Kaito’s ears would have perked. He had only heard it once before, briefly, in a moment of extreme confusion, but even with that in mind, it was still familiar, though Kaito couldn’t place why… a small, confused gurgle…

“Oh, oh!” Kaito said, a rush of excitement and apprehension running through him as he stood up, “‘Kichi, I think someone might be up!”

As Kaito hurried over to the crib, though she still wasn’t really opening her eyes yet, the baby had now started to move her head and mouth a little, her legs kicking within the blanket as her lips puckered out, looking for something to grasp onto. Each second that went by sounding slightly more frustrated as she couldn’t find what her little baby instincts were looking for. “...hrmgh!” She whimpered in outrage, starting to kick harder.

Kokichi almost rocketed out of his seat at the noises--Miya noises!!!--and it was only his fear of startling her that relaxed his movements into something more graceful. He peered over into the crib, Ikuo and Aiichi not far behind, though not crowding, and felt his heart start to thump in awe.

She was so alive…

She was pissed.

Laughing softly, Kokichi took a step back, going to root through their hospital bag. “Alright, I’ll go warm up her food. Think you can convince her that waiting a minute’s not the end of the world, hun?”

Uh oh, Kaito thought with some amusement, looking at her frustration mount at the continued lack of nipple in her life, She’s gonna start screaming soon. It begins.

“Hmm? Sure, I can try.” Kaito chuckled, not holding much hope as he leaned in and snatched her up gently, tightening her wrap a little and placing her head near his heartbeat-- every baby book in the world swore by this-- as he murmured to his whiney, fussy daughter, “Miiiiyaaaa… I’m so sorry you’re hungry, Miya… Miyaaaaa~koooo… Daddy’s getting the bottle warm. Dada’s asleep. Poor hungry Miya… Miiiiiy~aaaa...”

There was a brief moment where Miya’s face puckered with indignity, not to be appeased by mere soothing! She was hungry for the first time in her life, what kind of bullshi--

But it was hard not to get caught up in that familiar sound. That particular sound an endless curiosity in Miyako’s short, simple life. Settling down to listen to that strange, familiar sound. “Miiiii~yaaaaa…”

As much as it’d melt his heart to watch, Kokichi didn’t hesitate to get out the stored nectar and baby bottle they’d brought, heading to the adjacent bathroom. He ended up picking up the little baby bath--not having a bowl or the warmer they had set up at home--and putting it in the sink, turning on the hot water to fill. And as he poured out some nectar into the bottle--about three ounces, not about to overfeed their baby during her first ever meal--he could hear Kaito cooing in the other room, enough to make him smile.

And apparently enough to keep Miya from screaming.

It didn’t take long, the bottle small and the water heating up enough to warm up the bottle quickly, and soon enough Kokichi was back in the room, a gleam in his eye as he wasn’t quite ready to just let Kaito feed her without so much as a word. Bringing up a hand to cradle her head a little, Kokichi brought forward the bottle. “I’m sorry for taking so long, Miya. But your food is allll ready for you now.”

Kaito smirked, raising an eyebrow. “Taking advantage of my hands being full. Nefarious.”

But as much as Kaito wanted to keep teasing, he immediately went quiet, watching with wide, fascinated eyes as Miyako gave a small, earnest breath, testingly teasing at the nipple of the bottle… and Kaito’s eyes immediately started burning red as there were these small, breathy suckling sounds, Miyako not hesitating to start eating. “Oh nooooo,” Kaito whispered quietly, “‘Kiiiiichiiii I loooooove heeeeeeer…”

Miyako’s little body relaxed, no longer trying to kick out of her blanket now that she was getting what she wanted… and, struggling, her puffy, squinty eyes peeked open, looking with what Kaito could only call wariness on her little infant face as she peered around, sleepy eyes still half closed as she focused on nothing in particular.

Now they were feeding her, both a part of something so special. Kokichi felt some regret that Shuuichi wasn’t a part of it too--other than being the person the nectar was from--but Shuuichi really needed his rest and...well, there would be many, many other times to feed her.

Kokichi’s breath caught as she found the tip of the bottle and started eating, settling down and...oh god. Oh fuck she was opening her eyes. It was by a miracle that Kokichi was able to keep his hand steady for her, his eyes practically looking like they were wobbling with how wide and teary they were. Her gaze was disinterested, but still the gold was so bright. And even if they weren’t his, her eyes were still so big and…

Kokichi sniffled softly. “She’s so incredible.”

Kaito and Kokichi were quite a pair at the moment, both sniffling and blubbering at their entirely unimpressed baby, who was starting to blink harder, clearly growing sleepy again now that her hunger was abating. Though as Kaito watched, he started to fret, “Oh my god, what do we do next, do we let her go to sleep?? Do we try to burb her? She seems too small to pat on the back, is that a thing yet!?? She’s barely a day old I don’t want her first memory of her dad beng me hitting her back for no reason!”

Kaito’s mind went from ‘not worried’ to ‘oh no this is dire’ in literally one second, as he gave Ikou and Aiichi mildly panicked looks as he said, “Ikou, could you find a healer, I don’t know if we’re supposed to burb her yet!”

Ikuo came closer, taking a look at the near empty bottle and the sleepy look on Miya’s face. “Ya can burp her ‘mmediately, but i’s fer gettin’ out air she takes in while eatin’. Looks like she ate ev’rythin’ so she might not need it, but can’t hurt fer a few pats.”

Kokichi nodded eagerly and took the bottle away when Miya stopped suckling, immediately getting out one of the pads Ikuo had gotten them and laying it over Kaito’s shoulder, since he didn’t look like he was handing over their daughter any time soon.

Kaito looked vaguely like Kokichi had just brought him an ax and was gently telling him that ol’ yeller shouldn’t be left to suffer. She was so smallll… Kaito’s hand was huge! What if...!??

But he bit his inner lip and, bringing Miya up as carefully as he could onto his shoulder-- Miya fussing and whining slightly at the new angle-- and carefully, caaaarefully, eeeeever so slightly-- Kaito winced as he patted Miya’s back with two fingers while she wiggled slightly and whined…

“...did she do anything?” Kaito asked, as Miyako started to relax against his shoulder, laying her head down and blinking sleepily.

Kokichi peeked over. “...it doesn’t look like she threw up or anything, and she looks pretty comfortable… I didn’t hear her burp, but maybe she did? She seems alright to go back to sleep in any case.”

Aiichi and Ikuo looked over with amusement and fondness, watching the two new fathers--at least when it came to having a baby, for Kaito--adjust to the reality of their daughter.

They’d be alright.

Fuyuhiko was going through the reports on his desk, idly touching the edges of his eyepatch. The wound wasn’t fresh anymore now, the civil war now a few months behind him, but he could practically hear Peko chastise him for touching and fussing with it again. Young Master, if you want to minimize the scarring, you need to stop poking it…

Fuyuhiko sighed, running a hand over his short hair, scowling. He wished she was around to scold him. He knew where she was, he agreed with the mission she was on, those runners needed a sword to get through through the border and into Dicea. When he had heard how many kids they were trying to smuggle (well, kinda kidnap), he had okay’d the new mission specs, and the new timeline it would take…

But damn. He just wished she was back already.

Grumbling to himself, he pushed aside the next report-- some dumbasses trying to expand their territory, barely worth the process of putting them back in their place-- and saw some mail added to his files, one of them clearly one of those international pamphlets, if the Dicean seal was any indication…

Opening it up to read, Fuyuhiko’s eyes quickly went over the announcement… before chuckling in amusement. “Kaito and Shuichi’s kid was born, huh? Good on them. How many kids does that make for that big red-headed idiot then? He’s not even knocking up any women. If I had guessed about Kaito having a bunch of kids running around, I’d have fucking assumed it was from him not wrapping it tight enough with some floozy of the week… ah well. Good for him.”

“Miyako Saihara…” Fuyuhiko huffed a little laugh, putting it aside, “Congrats, Shuichi. Dating two princes and he’s the head of the family, huh? Always suspected he had it in him. You put those regals in their place, Saihara.”

“...Kaito?” Shuichi called out, shifting uncomfortably on the pillows and-- admittedly feeling a little silly-- asking, “Could you rub my shoulders a little, soon? My neck is starting to give me a headache.”

“Absolutely, handsome! Just…” Kaito bit his tongue a little, still wiping Miyako down from her latest changing, the window open to let out admittedly still pretty mild smell, “...give me a second here. How long is Miya’s poop supposed to be jet black like this? Like, at one point should I start to get worried?”

“Don’t be,” Shuichi sighed, still shifting, hoping to ease some of the pressure on his shoulder blades by finding the right spot, “They said it would take a couple of days. Day three is still in that window.”

Shuichi’s recovery was going remarkably well, and while they had been told he could end up in the hospital for up to five days, by the end of the second day the healers had been saying he could be good to go home soon, and by the morning of the third day had officially given them the okay to take him home. Shuichi had been relieved by this, because while he still wasn’t moving around much, he also wasn’t sleeping as much, and sitting awake in the hospital bed had quickly went from alarming to novel to frustrating, and he had been thrilled to be back in their room.

By day three they were also, little by little, starting to get used to the new challenges of taking care of a baby… or, well, if not ‘used to’ then just more ‘familiar with’.

Miyako had to be fed every three hours. The first six or so hours they had been allowed to allow Miya to sleep all she needed too, but after that initial feeding the first time she properly woke up, the trio had been sat down by the healers and told they needed to start regularly upkeeping Miyako’s feeding sessions. A few ounces every three hours, for the next two months… and then every four hours up by six months, and then after six months once every four to six hours, based on Miyako’s fussiness… and it had to start now. It didn’t matter if she was asleep, three hours go by? Gotta wake her up and make certain she eats.

Technically, they had all already known this, reading it in the baby books and talking about it to Ikou… but Kaito had laughed nervously as the healers had strictly explained the new schedule to them at the hospital, saying, “Man, when they said your sleep schedule would get wrecked, I thought it’d be the crying. I never stopped to consider we’d be the ones waking her up. Aw, I’m gonna feel bad disturbing her rest… but I will!” Kaito insisted, seeing the stern look come over the healers face, “Every three hours! Got it! We’re gonna be SO on top of it!”

And day three in, they were! ...and oh boy. As Kaito blinked tiredly, finishing cleaning Miyako up and carefully putting her in a fresh diaper, he knew this was going to get harder before it got easier. Not just the feedings, but the diaper changes…

This was her second diaper change that day, and the doctors had warned, that for every day she was alive you should expect to change as many diapers as her age until day six, in which case they would start expecting to change the diaper at least six times a day for definitely the first six months, and at least five for the first year. Any less? Bring her to the doctor, somethings wrong. Feedings every three hours, at least six diaper changes a day… oof.

“You’re gonna be so much work,” Kaito said softly to his daughter, grinning at her as she gave an annoyed little huffing sound, having been wiggling unhappily through the entire changing, “Though, I’m certain you think that’s all our fault. Oh, I know, I know, Dad’s woken you up from your nap, he’s so mean. You were all warm and toasty and now your hands and feet are all loose and chilly and the big weird man keeeeps going in annnnnd nibbling your stomach!”

Kaito leaned in and kissed Miyako’s belly, before making some exaggerated ‘Nom Nom Nom!’ noises into it, looking up and grinning as Miyako’s utterly baffled expression. That was mostly Miyako’s default expression right now. Everything was either incredibly annoying or utterly confusing, at least according to her little baby facial expressions, and, honestly? Fair.

Alright… now to wrap her back up in a bundle and hopefully let her drift back off to sleep before she finds something offensive about existing and starts to cry… tuck the blanket under one arm, wrap it around… then the other…

Day three, and Kokichi thought they were doing alright. He knew that wasn’t a very good showing, considering it was the first three days of the rest of their lives, and they’d had help in the hospital for the first two, but...he was going to take every small victory where it was. Build a collection of them to bolster him when things got harder.

Since they’d more or less just gotten home, Kokichi’s family and friends were still giving the family some space to rest--though, of course, Ikuo was still regularly checking in, and Maki and Tim came and went frequently--but he knew some of them were just bursting at the seams to come say hello and see Miya. But today would be another restful transition day.

They’d already had breakfast, and it was a little too early for lunch, but Kokichi had gone downstairs, getting them all some tea. Caffeinated tea. For all of them. (Even if the amount of caffeine wasn’t all that much). Dr. Tenchi had said that Shuuichi should wait at least three hours after having any sort of caffeine to breastfeed--or pump what would be Miya’s food--but other than that, he could start having it again. And...they hadn’t really talked much about it, but...Shuuichi wasn’t asleep all the time, and he seemed pretty awake and intent on staying that way when Kokichi left so...he figured it would be something nice for his boyfriend.

Lifting a leg to help support the tray as he unlocked the door--Shuuichi was bedridden, and if Kaito was holding Miya Kokichi didn’t want to put Kaito in a stressful spot--Kokichi shouldered his way in, his smile softening as he heard Miya’s soft fussing, but...no crying.

Another victory.

“I brought tea, if you guys want it.”

Shuichi’s eyes lit up a little, gaze training on the tray in Kokichi’s hand with uncertain hope. Meanwhile, Kaito had just successfully done another wrap, looking Miya over and deciding it seemed tight enough, while Miyako continued to give her dad a long, dumbfounded look as he leaned in to kiss at her forehead a little, high up her temple before quickly wiping it off-- the healers had warned them that for the first part of her life, she was less likely to get sick if they kept kisses to the face at a minimum. That was going to be a hard rule for Kaito to follow. He already constantly wanted to shower her with little baby kisses.

“Welcome back, babe.” Kaito greeted, glancing over his shoulder as he said, “Miya’s fed, changed, and all wrapped up, so I’m gonna put her in her crib to lay back down in a second. Wanna wish her a goodnight before you gotta wake her up in three hours?” he asked, half-joking.

Until Shuichi was capable of moving easily? Kaito and Kokichi had, at least during the day, agreed to take turns with feedings. The three of them hadn’t discussed yet what was going to happen that night, and, well… that was going to be a conversation they needed to have soon. But for now, it was just Kaito and Kokichi tag-teaming.

Kokichi laughed slightly as he set the tea tray down on their desk, coming over to the changing table. Kaito made his kisses brief and away from her face, cleaning up right after, but Kokichi had found his own method. Kissing into his palm, he curled his hand before gently holding it to the side of Miya’s head. “Dad’s taken good care of you, Miya-Miya. Sleep well.”

Miyako, Miya, Miya-Miya, Mi-Mi...the kid was gonna have a ton of nicknames.

Smiling at her and giving a non-hand kiss to Kaito’s cheek, Kokichi went back to the tea and grabbed two mugs, carefully making his way onto the bed next to Shuuichi. He settled one of the mugs between his legs to make sure it wouldn’t spill before offering the other to his boyfriend, tacitly asking how much Shuuichi could move his arms right now. It wasn’t the same curve Kokichi had when he wasn’t doing well, but...he was still asking.

Shuichi smiled warmly, and while his arms still had a sort of tired, heavy feeling, he had recovered quickly from the ‘can’t lift them’ stage. The mug still felt a little heavy to him, but Shuichi still gladly took it from Kokichi, “Thank you.”

He sniffed it slightly, a long, happy sigh at the scent of it. “Chai… I really missed chai tea.”

Kaito laid Miyako out into her crib, peering in and whispering little nonsense platitudes to her as Miyako gave a befuddled look around, apparently uncertain what to make of being woken up, fed, changed, and now wrapped up again and put back into the crib. She was awake now, dammit, certainly you didn’t expect her to just--

She blinked tiredly. Her blanket was warm… ‘dad’s voice low and far away… well, it wasn’t like she was doing anything anyway…

Kaito sighed, his shoulders relaxing when Miyako almost immediately nodded off. She was mostly going to be sleeping these first few weeks, they had been warned, and most of her crying was going to be the result of her being awake and not happy about it. And since the act of crying tended to keep little babies awake, her frustration with being up could become a self-perpetuating cycle… according to the baby books, anyway. So Kaito felt like they dodged a bullet every time Miyako didn’t start crying when she was woken up. So far they hadn’t really had an issue yet, beyond one night in the hospital where Miyako had taken offense to a healer showing Kaito how to bathe her with a rag. She had not liked that. ‘Bath time’ yesterday had been the most pissed Kaito had seen their daughter yet, and he was hoping that wasn’t going to be a trend when he did it again later today.

Taking one last look over their daughter, Kaito headed over to the bed, giving the tea an uncertain look, even as he poured himself a cup. “You sure you want to be drinking that, handsome? You can’t exactly spend any extra energy you get…”

“I’ll throw you out the window if you try to take this cup from me.” Shuichi said plainly, sipping at it with a contended sigh.

“Yep. Got it.” Kaito said quickly, taking a long gulp of his before saying, “Alright! Shoulders, right?”

Kokichi grinned at the happy look on Shuuichi’s face. They’d have a lot of new things to adjust to, but for Shuuichi...things would be getting easier. And getting to eat and drink the stuff he couldn’t have while pregnant was a nice step towards that.

Sitting back a little as Shuuichi seemed steady with his cup, Kokichi brought up his own, rubbing his thighs a little from the red spots the heat from the mug had left. “Ah, tea and a massage? Real comfy time for Shuu-chan right now.”

Kokichi made a little room for Kaito as he joined them, helping Shuuichi sit up more, and he watched his partners with love. “...it’s nice to be home. ‘Course it’s different than going away on vacation, but...still. I’m looking forward to sleeping in our bed tonight.” He rolled his eyes a little. “For however much sleep I’ll actually get.”

At least he didn’t have to worry about getting up to go to the office in the mornings. Kokichi knew the laws around paternity time were pretty tough, but Aiichi and Hideki had cornered him and practically bullied him into not going into work for a while. Mmmmaybe he could get away with grabbing a form or two and doing work in their room if he wasn’t doing anything else, but...even then he knew he’d be getting some dirty looks.

Now was the time to focus on his family. The country could deal without him for a few months.

(...Kokichi...hadn’t exactly discussed this with Shuuichi and Kaito, however. He was still a little in denial.)

Which was maybe the issue, since Kaito was already starting to worry that Kokichi was gonna try to stay up all night, and then try to go to work in the morning, because what the heck was paternity leave?? Or maternity leave, for that matter. In Luminary, once you were released from the hospital, that was it. Which tended to result in longer hospital stays, and a culture of babies being brought into work with their parents. Stay at home parenting was a luxury for the wealthy, and even then, it was considered more normal to hire help rather than quit your job to do it, just out of cultural expectations.

So, as Kokichi laughed lightly at the sleepless night ahead of him, Kaito started working on Shuichi’s shoulders, while his mind raced of how he could possibly keep his husband from exhausting himself like that. He could offer to just be the one to stay up all night and do it, but he suspected Kokichi would say no. And, honestly, Kaito just knew it’d be a bad idea anyway, because then he’d have to be up during the day too when Kokichi went to work, or else Shuichi would end up not letting himself rest, which was also unacceptable… hmmm…

As Shuichi sighed, Kaito working on his shoulder muscles almost mindlessly, Kaito said, “So… actually, I was thinking, what if… we asked Maki to come in and watch Miya for the first half the night, wake me up at midnight, and I’ll just… stay up? And watch her for the second half of the night? I don’t think Maki would mind…”

Shuichi frowned at that, “Kaito, there’s three of us. Why would we need to bring Maki into it? We can handle it among ourselves.”

“Well… at least until you’re feeling better, Shuichi?” Kaito suggested, not adding in that at some point Shuichi was going to need to sleep through the night for classes too, and Kaito would probably need help then as well. He could just try to be up all the time, but…

Kokichi sipped his tea, feeling it spread warmth throughout his body--which thankfully wasn’t uncomfortable yet, since it wasn’t a hot day--but he frowned gently at his husband, not really feeling cozy from what he was saying. “...I don’t mind asking Maki-chan to help out at night, since I think we’ll all feel better getting more sleep, but...Kai-chan, you just said that you’d be splitting the night 50/50 with Maki-chan.”

Kokichi’s eyebrows drew in, concerned. “...I know I tend to conk out at night, but I can stay up to look after Miya… I won’t fall asleep. I thought we were okay trusting each other with that…”

He tried not to assume. They were moving past all the problems that came with that. But still Kokichi felt a little...hurt, that Kaito hadn’t considered trusting him to take care of their daughter, to pull his share of time in these early days. He knew it came from love, Kaito wanting him to get enough sleep and not get sick, but...Kokichi could do it. They’d talked about it. And it hurt to hear Kaito pulling away from it now.

“No, no, of course you’re not going to fall asleep!” Kaito sputtered, an annoyed look crossing Shuichi’s face as he literally felt spittle fling onto his neck, his left eyes twitching slightly. “That’s not what I’m saying! I’m saying…”

Shoot, what was Kaito saying? He just didn’t want Kokichi to try to be up and functioning throughout the day while only getting half a nights sleep every night for the next… forever, it sort of seemed like right now. Kaito was sure the year would fly by, and once Miyako turned one her feeding and sleep schedule should become a little more normal, but a year was… a long time. Especially from the viewpoint of being three days in. It would be hard for Kokichi to do his duties as an Ouma like that.

(...and… his heart was still a thing…)

The problem was that in the face of Miyako’s care, Kaito still found himself desperately wanting to spare Kokichi and Shuichi any real discomfort in this process. He wanted Shuichi to rest and recover and go to school and for none of it to be hard. He wanted Kokichi to stay happy and not feel guilty about neglecting his work and to stay healthy throughout this.

(He didn’t want his partners to start to resent him and Miyako.)

(Kaito’s stomach twisted up with nerves of that unacknowledged fear in him.)

“... I mean, okay, so… at least until Shuichi starts feeling stronger, what if we did a sort of six hour shift situation? Or, like, four parts of the day? Maki could come feed Miya at midnight and wake me up at three, and… well, Maki wouldn’t need to come at ten before that, I can feed Miya before bed… so really, we’d just be asking Maki to come once a night to give me a chance to sleep six hours, and I’ll wake up at three, and then I can do the morning shift too, and when Kokichi gets off work, he can let me take a nap in the afternoon…”

Kaito was mostly murmuring to himself right now, still digging his thumbs into Shuichi’s back, trying to work out a system where he could still, in theory, just do it all himself. Shuichi rolled his eyes at Kokichi, before saying, “Kaito, that’s a terrible idea. If anything, if we’re going to ask Maki for help, we should ask her to watch Miyako in the middle of the day to give us a break, and even still, with three of us I don’t see why we’d need to ask her to come in at night. I won’t be bedridden forever, and Kokichi can handle getting up in the middle of the night just fine. If anything, right now Kokichi should do the ten and midnight feeding, and you’ll do the three am and six am feeding. And when I’m feeling better we can just start trading off who does the midnights and three am feedings.”

...for a moment, Kokichi’s eyes glazed over.

...resentment? Why would Kaito be scared of resentment? ...well, of course he knew, but...they had talked about it again and again and again--Kokichi wasn’t going to resent Kaito for...pretty much anything. Even for things he probably should resent his husband for.

However, when Kokichi blinked and tuned back into the conversation, Kaito said something else--...he’d said that first part too, right…?--that made Kokichi blink in confusion, looking between his partners with an unsure expression.

“Um… I mean, I think that’s a good idea, Shuu-chan, I don’t mind taking the nine and midnight meals, and we can work out doing training in the afternoon so Kai-chan can get rest, like he was thinking about before, but…” Kokichi blinked again and looked between his partners. “...we don’t have to factor in my work hours for a long time, remember? I’m on paternity leave.”

Shuichi nodded-- he and Ikou had talked about this already, Shuichi reading up on the legalities of it a little bit a few months ago-- as Kaito gave Kokichi a blank, uncomprehending look…

...oh.

Kaito laughed, giving his husband a slightly smitten look, but… “Aw, babe, I really appreciate that you’re going…” Paternity leave? From context it sounded like Kokichi was planning to take some time off work. “... to, like, back off work for a little bit. But, I mean… we talked about this. That was a misunderstanding, I’m not asking you to swear to put work off for us. Your works important, and that vow had nothing to do wi--”

“Alright, I’m stepping in.” Shuichi sighed, suddenly leaning back into Kaito, laying on his chest and putting his head back on Kaito’s shoulder, Kaito having to quickly adjust as Shuichi essentially laid out on him. “He’s not taking time off because of his vow. He literally has to. It’s a law here.”

“... what?” Kaito asked, looking befuddled.

...it’s a law here. Not in Luminary.

Kokichi shouldn’t be surprised.

Taking a breath, Kokichi reached out to put a hand on Kaito’s arm, squeezing gently as he gave his husband a smile. “In Dicea, when someone has a child, or adopts a young child, and even for older kids there’s similar laws, but,” Kokichi cut himself off on explaining all the nuances, shaking his head. “But for new parents, there’s this thing called paternity or maternity or parental leave, as most people call it these days, where for three months, the new parent isn’t allowed to come into work and, well, work, but they still get any work benefits they’d normally have, and they have a position still waiting for them.”

Kokichi sighed, holding his mug to his chest. “And the law dictates three months at a minimum, though most places go longer, and you’re protected under law to request up to a year of completely no work. After three months and up to a year and a half, you can work from home, for the positions you can do that for, or work partial hours without any worries about demotion or cut benefits or anything.”

Turning to the side, Kokichi pouted a bit. “...Uncle said he’d threaten to put the business mail into a lockbox if they caught me trying to work these next three months, so...work’s not even an idle option for me.”

“...oh.” Kaito said, looking still pretty confused… before he laughed, wrapping his arms around Shuichi and relaxing into his boyfriends lean against him, kissing at his head as he laughed some more, “Ah, geez… I didn’t know that! Why didn’t you tell me, Shuichi!?”

“Ikou and I talked about it a few months ago, and I think I just wasn’t talking to anyone about much of anything when I learned about it.” Shuichi admitted, shrugging, “I was just sad and annoyed. And I didn’t think about it after that.” he looked up at Kaito, his expression softening slightly at Kaito amused annoyance, closing his eyes as Kaito took the opportunity to place kisses against Shuichi’s forehead. “Sorry, Kaito. I just wasn’t thinking about it.”

“My partners are so mean to their Kaito. No one ever tells me anything…” Kaito pouted with some exaggeration, before placing a few more kisses against Shuichi’s hairline, who was contently relaxing into Kaito’s hold. “But… that’s a great thing! That’s amazing! So, wait… you really don’t have to go into work at all for the next few months? What about your workload? Is someone coming to help Nadya?”

Kokichi relaxed his pout--it really was a good thing, despite what his little workaholic heart wanted--and smiled softly at Kaito. “Sorry… It really didn’t occur to me to explain. And...I kinda didn’t wanna think about it,” he sighed. “Of course I wanna focus on taking care of Miyako, and I am glad I’m not expected in the office in the mornings, but...not even getting to sneak away something easy to work on is gonna drive me nuts…”

Scrunching his mouth to the side, Kokichi stuck his tongue out. “Since it’s an extended leave, Nadya-chan’s gonna be working with Uncle Hideki and the others in the main office. She’s done it before when I’ve been out of the office for a while, but since we know about this ahead of time, she hasn’t been working on notation forms ‘n shit by herself, and has already been working with the others.”

Kokichi shrugged a little. “Maybe they’ll hire some part-timers, since it will be a heavier load for a while. But that’s for them to decide how workflow’s goin’. Now that the war’s over and people are back home and reintegrating and the land has plans for it...things are a little easier than they’ve been for a long time. But you never really know what new problems are gonna show up.”

“But!” Kokichi chirped, sitting up more and drinking his tea with a smirk, “It does mean I’m not gonna get called into court for months.”

“Huh… no desk work, no court…” Kaito rested his chin atop Shuichi’s head, who was somehow both effortlessly sipping at his tea still while his eyes were barely open, looking simultaneously alert and on the verge of sleep. “Okay… so if you were up late, you could just sleep in then… that’s not nearly as bad as I thought. I just didn’t want you trying to function on just five or six hours of sleep every night… it’s not good for you, babe. And your work would have suffered.”

Shuichi rolled his eyes behind his eyelids, “Sure. But you would have done it ‘just fine’.”

Kaito frowned, “I don’t have anything else I need to be alert for--”

“You better talk that out with Maki, then, because somehow I don’t think Tim’s going to never need you during the day. And Miyako being taken care of by someone just barely functioning is an accident waiting to happen.”

Kaito frowned at that, “...well, I mean, I did say I’d ask Maki for help…”

Shuichi sighed, “Kaito, ask us for help first. You could have just told us you were worried about Kokichi working too much and sleeping too little. Dr. Mariah said we should discuss our ‘worst case scenarios’, remember? So we’re all on the same page.”

“Yeah… yeah.” Kaito sighed, running a hand through his hair, before chuckling as Shuichi grumbled, returning his hand to hold him again, “Okay, so… with that in mind then… how do we divy this up?”

“How do you two divy it up.” Shuchi corrected him, sipping his tea, “I’m still on bed rest. Ask me again in a few days.”

Kokichi nodded gently and crawled up the bed to sit next to Shuuichi and Kaito, wanting to have more contact than just sitting in the same area. He had other things in his life--as much attention as Miyako needed, it would be unhealthy for any of them to only focus on her--but for the most part...he was going to be looking after her. Hanging out in their room while she was sleeping, playing and talking with her, taking her out for walks…

He’d had a serious conversation with Dr. Egami about trying to, once a day, get out and about and do something for himself. So...he’d make sure to do that too. And none of his friends were just gonna drop off the face of the earth, even if he couldn’t do day-long hangouts anymore.

Things were different, but they could still find a balance.

Snuggling down a little, Kokichi placed a kiss on Kaito’s shoulder. “I have a feeling we’re all gonna be taking naps during the day to catch up on sleep. But we’ll listen to each other and our bodies and make it work. I think the general idea of six-hour shifts is good? Like...I can take six in the evening to twelve, you take the early morning, I’ll take mid-morning, you take afternoons… Or something vaguely like that? But I think that we should be open to asking Maki-chan or Ikuo to take over for a few hours during the day here and there so we have time not just to sleep and do the stuff we need to to take care of ourselves, but just...to have time to do things we wanna. And it can be a big help if our therapy appointments don’t line up to shifts.”

“It’s going to be difficult,” Kokichi hummed, “But we don’t have to run ourselves to the bone. We have the resources to not have to, and it’s just...silly to push ourselves to that point. The load gets lighter the more people who carry it, yanno?”

“Yeah, that makes sense… we’ll ask Maki about it next time she comes to check on us.”

“Probably lunch.” Shuichi pointed out, as Kaito grinned at Kokichi’s little kiss, moving his head down and not quite managing to steal a kiss from Kokichi, looking intently at him, wordlessly asking for one. “I think the only reason she’s not here now is because she’s trying to keep the kids from storming in here asking to see the baby, but Haneda’s going to be stepping in during the afternoon.”

“Hmmm~” Kaito grinned at the idea of the girls gushing over Miyako. That’ll be cute…

“Also, can someone check on Nini?” Shuichi asked, suddenly opening his eyes and looking worried, “He’s fine on food, and his water should have been okay for the two days, but it probably needs changing, and he might be lonely…”

“Loney.” Kaito said, full of disbelief, “Uh huh.”

Kokichi sighed happily. “I am worried about it getting too overwhelming for her, but I’m excited to show everyone Miya. I think I really get it now, why parents are always gushing over their kids so much…”

Temp and Amber and Stacy and the kids, Denji and Lake and Nazumi and Kokichi was definitely gonna catch Nadya after work sometime to have her come up… Not to mention that everyone in the dang castle was gonna fawn when they started bringing her out for walks, but that would still be a while…

Humming, Kokichi acquiesced and gently kissed Kaito properly before giving Shuuichi a nod. “Yeah, depending on if Maki-chan comes here immediately, or if she gets food first, I’ll go check on Nini then. I’ll tell him all about what’s been going on, until you can tell him yourself.”

Kaito rolled his eyes, “You can do that, babe, I’d rather change Miyako’s diaper than go keep that serpent company.”

“Fantastic. You will.” Shuichi said smugly… before glancing over at the crib. “...do you… two think I should try to breastfeed her?”

“Mmmm… why?” Kaito decided to ask, before answering, “What’s your thought process?”

“The books all talk about how important skin to skin contact is for her, that we can’t just have her in the wrap all the time… breastfeeding is easy skin to skin contact.”

“Sure, but it’s not the only way. Hell, I’ll throw my shirt off next time Miya needs a bottle, it doesn’t have to be you breastfeeding to give her that.” Kaito said, carefully hugging Shuichi without actually squeezing his middle in any meaningful way, “And… I don’t really want you to do anything that makes you uncomfortable…”

Shuichi frowned. Clearly not sure himself about how he felt about it.

Kokichi gave Shuuichi a mildly surprised look before turning a little pink and scratching at his cheek. “...I was actually planning on feeding her shirtless the next time I do. I just felt weird about taking my shirt off in the hospital, even if we were in a private room.” It was nothing doctors hadn’t seen, and it would be good for Miya, but...still. It was too weird, and the stint was short enough that Kokichi felt okay keeping his shirt on until they were back home.

Looking over at the crib, Kokichi sat back against their pillows and hummed softly. “...I think Kai-chan’s right, in that we can give skin contact to Miyako without you breastfeeding, so...I don’t think it’s a matter of necessity, really. I think it’s just something for you to decide as a bonding thing between you two.”

Kokichi looked back over to Shuuichi and gave him a kind shrug. “You have time to think over if it’s something you wanna do. She’s gonna have nectar or formula in part for the next year.”

“I know, I guess I was just thinking about how I need to pump again soon, and it feels kind of… cruel? To pump while Miyako’s right there, needing skin contact.” Shuichi confessed, shrugging, “I know my chest gives me a lot of mental hangups, but it feels selfish to be so in my own head about it that I’d deny Miya something.”

Kaito frowned at that, idly kissing Shuichi’s head, “...yeah, but there’s benefits the other way too, right? Pumping means you’ll have spare that me and Kokichi can use when it’s our turn to feed her, and, like, trying to breast feed her and pump is a lot of stress on your chest, right? Like Kokichi said, you can do it if you want to for the experience of it, I think that shits really neat, personally. But she doesn’t need you to work yourself that hard.”

“... oh, shoot, I meant… that stuff is really neat.” Kaito corrected himself, brow furrowing. “Stuff. Stuff.”

Again, Kokichi shrugged a little. “Think it over. It’s not like you have to establish a pattern or anything. If you’re up to it and want to try it, give it a try once. Maybe it’ll be something you want to do more, or maybe it’s not for you and we’ll just do skin-to-skin while feeding her from a bottle. There’s no rush and no pressing need.”

After a moment, Kokichi smirked a little and nuzzled at Kaito’s shoulder. “...that’s another point, actually, though I guess we can talk more about it once she starts speaking… Do you guys have a particular way you wanna handle swearing?”

“I don’t really swear that much to begin with.” Shuichi shrugged, “And honestly, as long as she’s not swearing at any of us, I’m not terribly worried about her picking up… well, Kaito’s swearing, really. You swear pretty rarely too, Kokichi. And I don’t think I ever really hear anyone else swear.”

Kaito frowned, “You and Maki drop F-bombs sometimes. ‘Kichi too.”

“That’s only after hearing you swear twenty times in the last twenty minutes.” Shuichi chuckled, “Every now and again I’ll say something aloud and realize, ‘Oh. That’s Kaito.’ You’re infectious.”

“What? I mean, we basically talk the same anyway--”

“Like, I mean, ya know, totally.” Shuichi said dryly, looking over at Kokichi, “Me and Kaito totally talk the fucking same, right ‘Kichi?”

Kokichi nodded, agreeing with those terms--at least for her childhood, since there was very little they could do about enforcing her speech when she got to be a teen, and while it’d break his heart, Kokichi figured they’d be on the receiving end of swears at some point or another--though he paused when Shuuichi claimed that she’d mostly be getting it from Kaito. Kokichi knew he did swear sometimes but...and, well, yeah, Kaito’s was probably the most frequent…

Kaito was definitely the most concerned of them about trying to curtail his language, and originally Kokichi hadn’t really found a problem with it but...if his magnitude was that much more...hmm…

As Shuuichi made his point about speech patterns, Kokichi looked up out of his reverie and snorted, but...something interesting happened. Right at the end, Kokichi’s cheeks went red and he glanced away, hunching into himself in a flustered motion as a smile played on his lips. “U-uh...yeah. Completely the same.”

Shuichi raised an eyebrow at that, recognizing the fluster, but entirely lost as to why. Maybe some stray thought had entered Kokichi’s head?

Kaito, in turn, watched Kokichi’s expression with focused interest, just momentarily caught up in the signs of one of his partners… before grinning with adoring amusement. “Awwww, that’s cute…”

Kaito shifted his arm out from around Shuichi, who pouted slightly before shifting his weight, as Kaito wrapped his arm around Kokichi, drawing him in a little for an easier kiss against the corner of his mouth, “I’ll be a little jealous to give up exclusive ‘Kichi rights, but if it makes him that happy, you should do that more often, handsome.”

“Do what?” Shuichi asked, “Talk like Kaito?”

Kaito huffed, “And I’m the stupid one. Honestly.”

“You’re not stupid, Kaito.” Shuichi said automatically, “But it really is up to you how quickly Miyako picks up cursing. Out of all of us, she’s going to hear it from you the most.”

Kokichi huffed softly and rubbed his face, calming down before he could bring himself to turn back. It was probably just the novelty, Shuuichi rarely called him anything but his full name, but...it had sounded so nice in his voice. Hearing Shuuichi call him by a nickname...GAH!

Snuggling down against his partners, placing a kiss to Shuuichi’s shoulder--remember, Shuuichi’s sneaky; even is he doesn’t get it now, he’d certainly hit Kokichi with it hard another time--Kokichi half shrugged. “To me...I’m not that worried about when she picks up swear words. I just...want us to be on the same page about teaching her how to use them, you know? Like...you guys always call out Tim’s swearing--is that what you want for Miya too?”

Kaito looked down at his men, starting to play with Kokichi’s hair a little as his husband went to snuggle in beside Shuichi, who hummed contently at Kokichi’s closeness and affection. Kaito glanced over at the crib, kept beside the bed for now-- they’d likely move it over by the window when Miya was a little more stable and it felt safer to have that distance from her-- and saw her contently sleeping in her bundle.

Everyone was safe. Everyone was fine… Timothy was with his friends, Maki looking after them. Hopefully not doing anything… weird. She’d be by for lunch. Everyone was safe, everyone was fine…

“I don’t really know.” Kaito admitted, shrugging slightly, not hard enough to jostle his men too much, “Cursing is different in Dicea. In Luminary, you didn’t curse in front of people as a sign of respect to them. And I started cursing a lot when I was a teenager and going through my big ‘rebellious’ phase and, because I was so high ranked, no one could really stop me or scold me or whatever, so it became a really persistent habit. My cursings not a f… it’s not a virtue to me, ya know?”

“But, it is a virtue here?” Kaito recalled, knowing that wasn’t entirely right as he amended, “Sort of? People curse at the king as a sign of respect so… I don’t want to set Miyako up for failure.”

Kokichi shrugged a little, pressing more soft kisses to Shuuichi’s arm. “It’s...complicated. People can see not swearing as...being kinda rude and uptight, or a sign that you’re not comfortable which...kinda just pings to people that there’s something wrong? Or that they should do something? But it really can be that that’s just not the way you speak.”

“Swears are like...speech amplifiers, right? So...to a lot of people, if you double down on what you’re saying, then you really mean it, and that’s admirable. It means that things are going well. But the context does matter too… If you’re really upset about something, and you’re swearing, that’s not a sign that things are okay, you know?”

Kokichi sighed, wiggling his toes in his socks a bit, sliding his legs across the blankets on their bed, enjoying that soft, slidey feeling. “...there was this system I read about in one of the parenting books? Where, when your kid starts to learn swears, and is gonna use them, give them permission to, but explain that...well, there’s contexts for it. So make an agreement that before they swear, they ask you if it’s an appropriate context. So...they get to express their lingual freedom, but also learn about social cues and contexts ‘n stuff.”

Shuichi frowned, “I just want to stop her if she starts swearing at people. I’m not about to be the parent of the ‘asshole’ kid. If Miyako’s being horrendous to someone and they’re looking at us with a ‘why won’t you do something’ expression, I’m officially burying myself in a hole in humiliation.”

Kaito chuckled, rubbing Shuichi’s side soothingly. “We’re not going to raise, or let, our kid be a bully, Shuichi. If she picks up my rage issues, we’ll manage it. I had rage issues and I don’t think I ever got to bully stage.”

“Mmmm… you could be a little insufferable sometimes.” Shuichi laughed, snuggling into Kaito’s chest as Kaito gave a little offended ‘Hey!’, “But, I will admit, you never really said anything that felt… malicious, I guess might be the word. You’d get angry and scream and lose it, but you basically always tried to get away from people when that happened. You’d get angry and disappear, so it… never really felt like you were trying to scream people down or intimidate anyone, outside of those fights we’d get into. Just in general? It always seemed like you’d get angry by mistake and then try to keep it as far from everyone else as possible. So… it never got to bully levels of anger, I suppose.”

“Right. So… I mean, I really hope Miyako never has to deal with that, but…” Kaito suddenly looked tired, giving the crib a sad, uncertain look as he said, “But there’s ways of coping with that stuff. We’ll help her. She’s not going to grow up to be hateful or a bully, we’ll keep an eye on it.”

“Mm, no swearing at us or other people. Those are lines I agree with.” Again, as she got older, there would only be so much they could do. But as she was learning language and all the social things that came with it, if they explained to her why those things were hurtful? Then at least she would be able to speak with purpose. Maybe she would want to be hurtful, but then that was a different conversation they could have.

Kokichi agreed that Kaito wasn’t a bully, but...he thought back to those early days. It was under a lot of stress, and Kokichi had painted a picture of reality that wasn’t true at all, so...it wasn’t really Kaito’s fault… It wasn’t malicious, but...Kaito could certainly be intimidating. And it was less about language, and more about...er, body language, so...different subject.

Shifting his head a little, Kokichi switched his kisses onto Kaito’s shoulder. “She’ll be alright. We’ll show her love, and pick up on how she expresses fear and anger and all that stuff. In some ways, I think it’ll really help her that we’re trying to be really conscious of all that stuff.”

“Hmmm.” Kaito smiled, relaxing into Kokichi’s affection, noticing Shuichi’s eyes were closed, though his grip on his empty tea mug was still steady. Chuckling to himself-- Shuichi sighed as he felt Kaito’s chest vibrate-- Kaito went to take Shuichi’s cup from him, his boyfriend letting it go as Kaito put it over on the nightstand. “We’ll tell her, Miya, when you were born, all your parents were in therapy, alongside your Aunt Maki. And boy… did we all super need it.”

“Heh.. we’ll be quoting Dr. Mariah to Miyako to the point where she’s sick of it.” Shuichi realized, shaking his head against Kaito a little, “She’ll grow up resenting Dr. Mariah just for being such a constant hypothetical busy-body in her life.”

“It’ll be a good thing, I think… I just want Miya and Tim and Feelings Baby to grow up emotionally stable. I don’t want their whole lives to have to fall around their ears before they realize something is wrong.” Kaito said, glancing at the crib again, “Stable… I just want their lives to be stable. That’ll be eno--”

There was a knock at the door. Just a little too loud.

An upset gurgling sound in the crib.

“...I swear to Atua.” Kaito growled, shifting out from behind his lovers, “Whoever just knocked better have the best excuse in the world.”

Kokichi laughed softly. There were far worse things in the world than your parents being overly aware of their communication habits and emotions. At the most annoying? Miyako would just get embarrassed by how overly considerate they all tried to be, but they’d still be lessons she learned. And in the case where she needed some extra consideration, they’d be prepared.

(...they could explore together how to navigate relationships when you could feel what others are feeling. What was overstepping, and what was having an advantage to be a better person to others. Maybe Miyako would have different boundaries than Kokichi, but he still wanted her to understand his reasoning.)

Kokichi looked over at the door in surprise before getting up too, heading over to the crib while Kaito went for the door. She still wasn’t crying yet, so they had a chance.

Gently cupping her side with his hand, Kokichi quietly shushed his daughter. “It’s alright, I’m sorry you got woken up. It’s never fun when you’re having a nice nap, huh? But it’s alright, you can go back to sleep--Dad’s handling it.”

Miyako, who still wasn’t in any way used to loud, sudden bangng sounds, scrunched her face up and trembled her lips, wiggling in her blanket slightly as she blinked sleepily at nothing… but having something soft and warm against her face helped a bit, not quite ready to lose it as she gurgled unhappily.

Dad was pissed… but his emotions did calm a little when he opened the door and saw a sheepish, uncertain Hajime, who immediately said, “Was that too loud? Sorry, I really only thought of it the second after I did it. Everything alright?”

Kaito was still upset… but it was harder to be upset at Hajime’s sheepish embarrassment, his shoulders relaxing a little as he said, “It’s fine, it’s fine, just try calling out to us next time. Miya’s going to be asleep all the time for awhile, so it’s never really a good time to knock for a bit… are you here to see the baby, Hajime? We weren’t quite ready for visitors…”

“No, though, again congratulations. Shuchi, if you can hear me, welcome back! Hope you’re feeling alright.” Hajime said, not able to see past Kaito, who stood at the crack of the door.

“Thanks, Hajime. I’m alright.” Shuichi called back sleepily, nuzzling into the pillows now that he lacked body pillows.

“No, I didn’t come to see Miyako.” Hajime said, and while at first he smiled, he stopped, feeling like he knew the situation well enough to not assume to be happy about it, “...um. Your brother’s on the phone. He told the secretary to send me to fetch you.”

Kaito didn’t know what his face looked like. But Hajime saw it and immediately said softly, “We can come up with an excuse…”

“What?” Kaito said dimly, blinking a few times before he finally cleared the fog a little, “No, no, don’t make an excuse, I… I mean, I can go, right? He’s on the phone now? How long has he been waiting?”

“Um, maybe ten minutes--?”

“Oh, that’s too long.” Kaito said softly, putting his hands together and starting to massage the knuckles, looking at nothing for a second before looking over his shoulder, “Uh, I need to… is it alright if I go answer a phone call?”

Shuichi, who hadn’t heard what Hajime had said, still frowned. There weren’t a lot of good reasons someone would call Kaito… “Don’t be long.” He decided to say. If only because it might give Kaito the excuse he needed to not sit there and listen to someone monologue at him what a piece of shit he was.

Kokichi glanced up at the door, just barely able to see Hajime around Kaito, and he nodded to himself before focusing down on Miya again. “Aw, Miya, it’s Hajime-chan. He’s one of your brother’s uncles, you know? He’s a very nice person, he didn’t mean to wake you up. We’ll put a sign up, that’s a good idea--people know, but reminders can help. No loud knocking while Miyako is all snoozy…”

Continuing to soothe their daughter--and even farther from the door than Shuuichi--Kokichi couldn’t hear what Kaito and Hajime were talking about, but… (There was a spike of nervousness...among other things.) If Kaito was getting a phone call… Kokichi sighed softly and looked up again, giving Kaito a thumbs up with a smile before going back to Miya.

“Isn’t that fun, someone wants to talk to Dad. Your dad is a lovely person, Mi-Mi, I’m sure there’s dozens of people on top of this person who wants to talk to him about you. And of course Dad’s gonna gush all about how perfect you are--it’s kind of our job right now. But he’ll be back--if you go back to sleep it’ll happen even sooner for you.”

Miyako’s eyes focused a little in Kokichi’s direction. Not quite catching his eyes yet, but getting closer. It wouldn’t take her long, to start recognizing faces. Her curious golden gaze somewhere up in daddy’s direction, soothing sounds tip-toeing around her…

(Something internal reaching out mindlessly, patting around with all the clumsiness and directionless exploration of an infant, feeling Kokichi’s reassurance as genuine.)

...and she yawned, closing her eyes again. Leaning her head against Kokichi’s hand.

Okay okay okay, Kaito had to go. Time to go, time to go, Byakuya was calling, Byakuya was calling, time to go--

--...

It was so… fucking shitty, this room.

Kaito decided in that moment that he hated the castle phone room. It was an ugly, shitty room with ugly, soft yellow walls. He felt his face twitch as the door shut behind him, the secretary in charge leaving him too it, and he looked around th room and wondered ‘Who the fuck picked this ugly, gross yellow color?’

Kokichi should have them fired. Kaito was going to find out who had painted this room, and tell his husband to fire them, he was the Prince-Consort, he was allowed to be unreasonable like that! Kokichi was the heir-apparent! Did that mean he was allowed to fire people? Uh… probably not! Based on everything else! But Kaito was still going to demand it!

...fuck just pick up the phone man what good was staring at the wall going to do?

Kaito picked up the handle of the phone and immediately grinned wide as he put it to his ear, “Kaito Momota!”

“Kaito Ouma,” Byakuya corrected, “You really should just officially get it change by this point, Kaito. Since you’re apparently not planning to pass down the name to any of your children, there’s no particular reason for you to pretend like you’re the head of your household. Denying the name change by this point is more embarrassing than anything else.”

Kaito opened his mouth to speak and just… found himself floundering, murmuring something vaguely apologetic, as Byakuya went on without him. “I’m calling due to reports of Shuichi’s daughter being born. It’s been said she was born healthy and Shuichi’s surgery went well.”

It wasn’t a question, but Kaito said, “Ye...yeah! Everything went well and--”

“I know, I just told you that, Kaito.” Byakuya sighed, before continuing on, “Marigold is well along by now. She’ll be giving birth to Theor in the early winter. Theor will, of course, be taking the Momota name, so that’s that aspect of our legacy taken care of. I’m curious, what features has she taken on?”

“...oh.” Kaito realized he was meant to actually respond to that, “Oh, uh… she has Shuichi’s eyes and Kokichi’s hair?” he said, like he wasn’t certain. “They, uh, they think she looks a little like me, but she still in that early baby phase, ya--”

“None of our parents traits? Not much of a legacy child, but considering her namesakes, perhaps that’s for the best. Still, I would have thought with so much blue hair in her lineage, I was certain the blue hair would pass on.” Byakuya said idly, and… Kaito knew it was truly idle. That Byakuya didn’t really care if Miyako looked like their parents, that this was probably more just his brother confirming or disconfirming some guesses to himself. That this was a casual conversation.

But it was so surreal… Kaito hadn't talked to Byaluya since before his brother lost the war… and he had tried, and now his brother was calling and asking about hair color, and maybe Kaito should have been happy his brother was willing to take an interest without bringing up the past, but…

“...did you get my letters--”

“We need to discuss when you all will be coming to visit. I imagine the best time for our children to meet each other will be when Queen Kaede undoubtedly calls us to ensure our children give up our claims. She’s thorough that way. It’ll be an aggravating chore, but we should coordinate it to best suit us, rather than the other way around. Tell me, for the visit to Luminary, do you expect just yourself and young lady Saihara to make the trip?”

“...Princess Saihara.” Kaito said softly.

“By all rights you should be disowned and have lost your title by now.” Byakuya suddenly seethed over the phone, Kaito’s whole body jumping in alarm. “Coward… Shuichi is a lord due to my efforts, and your daughter will give up her claim. You should train her out of her title as a realistic expectation. She is a Lady of the noble houses. You will not correct me again.”

“...”

“And, really, you should take on the Ouma name. Don’t embarrass us by taking the Saihara name, that’s just shameful, but you have no moral right to the Momota name. You’re a traitor to both thrones and are not worthy of it. There’s no reason for you to hold onto it.”

“...”

“Kaito, I don’t speak for my own health. Acknowledge what I’ve told you. It’s really all for your own good. The Momota name can no longer protect you, so there’s no reason to hide behind it anymore. Understand?”

“...I want our parents letters to me.” Kaito said quietly.

Byakuya sighed, “I’ve told you before, I do not have them anymore. They were destroyed for your safety.”

“You read them.” Kaito said, feeling the anger start to build up in his chest, “They were our parents last words to me… what did they say?”

“Why on earth should I remember what they said? Kaito, calm down, your self-interest is blinding you. I am telling you the best path forward--”

“YOU DON’T GET TO TELL ME WHAT’S BEST!” Kaito suddenly screamed, his hand on his stomach, gripping his shirt as he glared viciously at that ugly yellow color. “YOU KILLED OUR PARENTS, LOST THE THRONE, AND ABANDONED ME IN ANOTHER COUNTRY! YOU DON’T GET TO DECIDE!”

“...I will give you one chance to calm down--”

“Why!? Or what!? What else could you possibly do to hurt me!? You’ve literally done everything within your power to destroy me when you were helping me! How much worse could you be trying to hurt me on purpose!?”

“Kaito, how dare you. I risked everything to save you. Father would have abandoned you to a warzone had I not interfered--”

“Great! Shocker! Shocking news! If my brother hadn’t done something AWFUL, my fucking FATHER would have! Between you, Kaede, dad, hell, who KNOWS what fucking awful, family destroying thing MOM might have been planning in her free time! All the FUCKING REST OF YOU SURE WERE! You destroyed us! All of you destroyed us! You and Kaede could have worked together! Everyone was PRAYING you were going to work together!! You were supposed to be BETTER!”

“I tried! She wouldn’t listen.”

“Probably because you were INSUFFERABLE! Everything that comes out of your mouth is like soul sucking POISON! You could have the secrets to the god damn universe, the literal keys to paradise, and no one would take them from you because you're such a BASTARD all the time!”

“I do not have to take this, Kaito. I would have thought you were grateful I reached out, considering the endless letters--”

“I was WORRIED ABOUT YOU! I wanted to talk to you, to make sure you were okay! I don’t need you! I just wanted to help!! I’m your brother, I’m supposed to watch out for you!”

“After everything you did? You’re lucky I don’t have the power to take you out of the family line anymore! You should have warned me of Maki’s intentions!”

“YOU KILLED OUR PARENTS! HOW IN ATUA’S GREEN EARTH DO YOU NOT SEE HOW YOU’RE THE TRAITOR!?”

“You wanna know what was in those letters?” Byakuya suddenly sneered into the phone, seething with rage. “Mother said she was proud of your marriage, and then spent several pages lamenting over all the ways you embarrassed her growing up in an endless self-pitying dribble. And father wanted a detailed recounting of how your consummation went. And he wanted portraits of the family. There you go. Your precious last words. Was it worth it?”

And then the phone went dead. Byakuya hanging up.

Kaito stared at the wall, listening to the dial tone. It really was an ugly yellow color…

“...taking on the Ouma name doesn’t even work that way.” Kaito said to the dead air. Like there was anyone still on to listen. “You still have no idea what my life is like here. You never let me explain. You’re not interested in me, you don’t actually care what I’m doing. You just want to… control me or own me or whatever the fuck all that shit from our childhood was.”

“But you can’t now.” Kaito told the dead air, “You can’t. You couldn’t even if I wanted you too. You destroyed everything. Our inheritance, our home, our family, everything. I can never go back, not for real. It’ll never be safe there for me again. Years will go by and Timothy will forget Luminary. He’ll never know what was supposed to be his. Miyako will never know it as more than stories. She’ll never taste the life that was supposed to be hers. You ruined it. You ruined everything. You destroyed our whole lives.”

“....I had just wanted to love you.” Kaito told the dead air, tears running down his cheeks. “All of you… I would have given everything to you. I did. I gave up my whole life and went where you all told me to go, and you all told me it was going to be okay, and it was, but… not for any of the reasons you all promised me. You all sold me and sent me away and then destroyed each other over nothing, and now I have none of the things you promised me. And I didn’t want any of it. I could have given it all up, if you all would have just… just loved me. Just loved each other. Why was that so impossible?”

“...I hope Theor’s born healthy.” Kaito told the dead air. Tiredly wiping his eyes, “I can’t wait to hear about how the birth went. Give Marigold my best. I’m sure she’s nervous, but tell her it really goes by quickly and it’ll be okay… um… say hi to Sonia for me. I hope she’s doing well. Um…”

“...um…” Kaito blinked tiredly at the yellow. “...um… I don’t… know what I’m supposed to do now. So… thanks for calling. I was worried about you, but it sounds like you’re doing alright… and…”

And Kaito lost steam there. Not sure what the point of his imaginary conversation was, finally just putting down the phone. Sitting down for a moment, just wiping his face off. Drained.

“...screw him anyway, I guess.” Kaito whispered. “... he can’t take Miyako’s title from her. Only Kaede can now. She’s a fucking princess… fuck you…”

...Kaito sighed. His tears drying up. When he went to the door, he grinned like his face wasn’t stained red, and said, “Good news! Did not punch the wall! So… yeah! Have a good day guys!”

Ryouhei, Takashi, and Tomomi could only exchange glances as they heard muffled yelling through the wall. The phone room was well-insulated, meaning to give the people having a call some privacy, but there was a limit to it, and Kaito was going beyond that limit. There was trepidation, but...also a sort of vindictive hope.

As much as they tried to keep things private, they were the people in charge of the telephone, so they knew it was Kaito’s brother on the line. And while Takashi had only shared his worries about the former king with Ryouhei, giving them a reason for investment, Tomomi was not truly as airheaded as she advertised herself to be.

All of them were worried about Kaito, but...there was a hope within them that Byakuya was getting what was coming to him.

When Kaito came out, he looked miserable, but there was still that hope. Giving him a wave, Tomomi chirped, “Have a good one, Kaito! Give our best to Kokichi, Shuuichi, and your daughter, will you?”

Kaito grinned like his world wasn’t falling apart, and… well, was it? Sure, all of that had… hurt. But, ha, it wasn’t new. Kaito’s life in Luminary had crumbled around him aaaaages ago, and that was just him… cutting himself on the debris. Again. Again, again, again, again--

Don’t bring that crazy to your daughter.

“Will do~” Kaito called back, heading out and, taking a quick look around, rubbing his hands over his face and through his hair. He took a couple of what he wanted to be soothing breaths, and for a brief moment there was this alarming feeling that he just couldn’t get enough air… but another breath after that filled his lungs and he felt a little better at that.

...did he have too? Today? Of all days? Did his brother have to put that shit on him? Kaito had no time to process any of that. He was busy! For fucks sake Byakuya, Kaito had other things to do in his life than deal with… all of that!

‘Shoulda just ignored him,’ Kaito thought to himself, heading up. ‘He’s not the heir-apparent or the king anymore, I don’t have to answer when he calls.’

Fuck ‘em. Fuck him, fuck him, fuck him, fuck him--

Don’t be angry when you go back in the room.

Kaito stared miserably at the door of their bedroom, trying to remind himself that he had a duty to his family. He had to be stable for them. Calm. He couldn’t lose it. Not now. Not ever, really… just go inside and be normal. Be calm. Be--

“Kaito?”

Kaito looked down the hall, Maki having been heading to her room, giving him a curious, concerned look. She always looks so pissed, when she was worried… Kaito’s stomach swamed with a sudden, warm affection, and he grinned warily at her, saying softly, “Hey, Maki-roll. Where are the kids?”

“The pond outside the wall. They’re chasing frogs.” Maki said, eyes narrowing suspiciously. “What’s happened?”

“Does it look that bad?”

“It doesn’t look good.”

“Heh…” Kaito ran his hands over his face again, smushing his palm against his eyes and rubbing his cheeks vigorously. “Better?”

“Obviously not.”

“Well, that’s the best I can do.” Kaito shrugged, “...I really gotta go back in. It’s not time sensitive, or, like, dangerous. Can I talk to you about it later?”

“Summarize and let me decide if it's dangerous.”

“Byakuya wants me to give up the Momota name and told my parents last words to me.” Kaito said dead-pan, “Spoiler alert: they sucked.”

Maki’s expression darkened… before she sighed, “You’re right, it’s not dangerous. Let’s talk about it later. Do you want me to bring up lunch for you all?”

“I’ll meet you down there at noon, we can bring food up together.”

“Fine.” Maki said, heading into her room and, without another word, shutting the door.

Kaito tried rubbing his face again, took another breath, and headed inside. “H~eeeey,” he said softly, “I’m gonna bet two out of three are gonna be dead asleep by now…”

Kokichi looked up as Kaito came back inside, a smile playing at his lips before it fell into a concerned expression. Kaito was right; Kokichi had managed to lull Miyako back to sleep after he left, and by the time Kokichi turned back around to the bed Shuuichi was out for the count. Kokichi had adjusted the pillow under his head a little, it having been disturbed when Kaito had been Shuuichi’s pillow, but he left his boyfriend to it, stretching himself out in the window seat to enjoy the mild sun.

But...it was no longer quite a sunny, lazy day.

Getting up, Kokichi padded over to Kaito, taking one of his hands. “Are you alright? You…” Feel devastated and tired and pissed and guilty… Kokichi pursed his lips together. “...do you wanna lie down?”

Kaito glanced at the crib and over at Shuichi, feeling a little better to see them both relaxed and resting. Kokichi’s immediate look of concern-- damn Kaito’s ugly crying face, why did it have to be so obvious?-- was less nice to see, though…

Kaito smiled, wrapping an arm around Kokichi’s back and pulling him into a hug, squeezing his hands for a second before pulling his arm away from Kokichi’s hold, using it to more fully embrace him. Kaito took a deep breath, breathing in Kokichi’s lavender. Kaito always had to hunch a little bit to bury his face in Kokichi’s hair, but he didn’t mind, just enjoying the press of Kokichi’s body against him.

“...I love you so much.” Kaito whispered.

And then he felt his back and shoulders shudder, and Kaito was very annoyed with himself as he tried to stifle a sob against Kokichi’s head. Dammit… dammit.

Kokichi went into the hug easily, his body pressing against Kaito and holding him close like it was the most natural thing in the world. And it was, despite their height difference. He put strength into his arms, rubbing Kaito’s back, just trying to be a steady presence for his husband, whose heart was tumultuous.

“I love you too, Kai-chan. More and more every day,” Kokichi murmured back, his heart aching for his husband when he felt a shudder go through Kaito’s chest. Kissing at his shoulders, Kokichi thought for a moment. Kaito needed some time, but...even if she was sleeping, it didn’t feel right to leave Miyako alone with a sleeping, recovering Shuuichi. It wasn’t a perfect solution, but...it wasn’t quite hiding this time.

Pressing a longer kiss to Kaito’s shoulder, Kokichi hummed softly. “...do you wanna sit in the closet together for a little bit? We’ll be able to still hear if Miya starts fussing.” And hopefully it would muffle some of the sound if Kaito needed to cry.

Kaito laughed at that. Not because it was funny, but… well, maybe because it was funny. But it was also a good idea. Which in itself was funny. Life was stupid. “Sure,” Kaito said in a shaky voice, pulling back from Kokichi a little, wiping his eyes with the back of his sleeve. “Why not. Closet time is always a good time.”

Well, historically, closet time was a mixed bag, but… again. Life was stupid. Sometimes you ended up crying in a closet because your brother was a dick to you over the phone.

Kaito glanced at the crib and Shuichi again, slightly concerned to be leaving them alone, but… it was okay, right? The idea was incomprehensible right now, but eventually they’d get to the point where it was okay to leave Miya alone when she was sleeping, and they were long past the days when they couldn’t leave Shuichi alone. Miyako would be okay in the room with Shuichi for twenty minutes, and, well, Kokichi and Kaito were right there if something went wrong. They’d hear Miyako crying if she woke up.

So Kaito only felt a little guilty when they closed the closet door shut, staring nervously at the crack beneath the door, listening for signs of distress-- like them walking away for just a moment would start the disaster-- before sighing, leaning his back against the wall and sliding down it, his butt hitting the floor with a soft thud.

“...I’m sorry, babe.” Kaito said softly, looking around the closet with a vaguely annoyed, tired air, “This is dumb. I just… need a minute.”

For a moment, Kokichi was reminded of the last time they’d gone into the closet while someone was sleeping in the room, but...he didn’t feel any guilt or anxiety or...really even a compulsion to compare the situations. They were completely different. The last time had been a moment of passionate selfishness that their friend had paid for. This time was just...them being people, and managing themselves in a responsible way. Being in the closet was no different than being across the room from the crib, but it gave the sense of a sort of shield, letting the walls come down--hopefully--for a moment before moving on with the rest of the world.

Because sometimes you just needed to take a moment. And there was nothing shameful or weak about it.

Kokichi sat himself down next to Kaito, not turning on the light. He made sure their arms touched, but he wasn’t pressing against his husband yet. Though he did nudge him. “It’s not dumb, and there’s nothing to apologize for. Just...take a sec to breathe, alright? Feel your feelings. Acknowledge them. And I’ll be here for whatever you need.”

Kaito nodded at that, staring at the far wall, before looking down at his shoes. He still hadn’t cleaned them. His boots were wearing down, scoffed, mud at the edges and indents. He supposed that was from their walks. Shameful. His mother would have a housekeeper fired. If they were one of the servants, anyway. If it was an Indentured, you had to be more creative with your punishments, couldn’t just send them away. Have to have them clean every shoe in the castle, well into the night. Their fingers aching and wrinkling from the effort, exhausted and knowing that in a few hours, even if they finished in time to sleep, they’d have to get up for the new day. Kaito’s stomach had used to twist uneasily when he saw someone who had clearly earned the ire of someone in the position to humiliate them. Degrade them. Exhaust them. It was easy to tell yourself they had done something to earn it, but Kaito had always had a hard time looking at it while it was happening.

Kaito had spent so long just trying not to look at stuff.

“Hey, babe, we have shoe polish in here, right?” Kaito asked, looking around. “Where is that… I know we have some, I saw it cleaning the closet once…” Kaito started shifting through the shoe boxes where Kokichi had collected little things over the years, thread and patches, what looked like a random, clean kitchen sponge, things he had likely used once and then kept because he had extra once he was finished. Where… “Ha, found it.” Kaito muttered, pulling out the shoe-cleaning kit.

Pulling off his boots, Kaito took one and grabbed the small brush, starting to determinedly clean at the edges. No Momota was going around in dirty boots… you could conspire to murder your family all you damn well pleased, but no child of Sayaka was walking around in dirty clothes…

“... Kokichi, what did you want from me in the memorial garden?” Kaito asked, determinedly brushing the rubber. Brow furrowed and eyes focused, now that his hands had something to do.

Kokichi helped search around for the shoe polish, recognizing the gesture of trying to keep your hands busy. This was Kaito finding a way to calm himself, to be able to talk without his bodily, aggressive energy making potholes and diversions. This was Kaito making his own coping method.

And maybe he just wanted to clean his shoes too.

...they should probably clean out the closet one of these days, but...Kokichi didn’t want to. Maybe he was a bit of a hoarder, but the clutter of things in the closet felt more comforting than overwhelming.

Settling back down, Kokichi looked over at Kaito in slight surprise before his lips thinned. The Memorial Garden, the first time. What did he want…?

“...I’m not sure, honestly,” Kokichi said softly. “I wasn’t thinking very straight… I knew...I couldn’t keep all those things secret from you anymore, but...that was more for my own sake than anything I wanted from you. I just couldn’t take it anymore…”

“...I don’t know.”

Kokichi sighed and tipped his head up against the wall, looking at the darkened ceiling. “...I think I wanted you to leave me there and...find happiness. Back then...I kept feeling like I was making you miserable, taking you away from everything you knew and keeping you in a strange, unwelcome country… I felt like a burden, like stones tied to you dragging you down to the bottom of a lake. I didn’t want to see you suffering...and I thought the way to stop that was to take myself out of the picture.”

Kokichi snorted lowly. “...I know how dumb that is now, but...that’s how I was feeling.”

Kaito listened carefully, his shoulders falling a little but his face getting tenser. There was a damn pebble ingrained into one of the ridges. The brush wasn’t gonna get that out. Kaito put the brush down and started digging into it with his nail, trying to dislodge it. “...I wish you had wanted something from me I could give you.” Kaito admitted, shrugging, “I mean, I guess I could have, but… that’s an ugly thought. I don’t like to think there’s a version of events where I could be convinced to let ya die just because you wanted to.”

Kaito frowned at that thought, digging his nail in harder. That little fucker was in there good. “I ask because I want to offer you anything you wanted from me that day. All the things I hadn’t understood. But… I guess I can’t. Or I don’t want to now that I know what it was. So…” Kaito shrugged, sighing, “Could you pass me that box with the sewing needles in it? Thanks babe.”

Taking the needle, Kaito started working on the pebble again. “...I know the vow you gave me meant a lot to you. It know it was about things that mattered to you. I respect and love that about you.” Kaito gave Kokichi a sudden, hard look. Brief, just glancing at him, but something sincerely frustrated in the gaze as he said, “But I need the vow I thought it was. I need you to swear it. It matters to me, okay?”

He said this like he thought a fight was coming. His whole body tense with aimless aggression.

Kokichi nodded silently. Maybe there really was a part of him that night that had just wanted Kaito to make it all stop hurting, but it had been so twisted with his own pain into something awful and hurtful. He knew what wanting to die felt like, but he also knew that great fear of wanting so badly to live, but crumbling under the weight of pain. Feeling like death was your only escape, but deep down, just wanting someone to say it was alright and that everything really would be okay. Someone to make it stop hurting.

In truth, it would never be just one person, though Kaito was an incredibly important person for Kokichi. Sharing the load of pain was a community effort, and not just a passive one. It took a great strength to look at that pain and then look outwards and take steps to tangibly make things better. It was the strength an Ouma needed, the strength they encouraged others to take up as well, because no one could wield that strength alone.

It was a lesson Kokichi had taken for granted, not truly understanding what it meant for all that he believed in it.

He passed Kaito the sewing kit.

As he’d said in therapy, the vow Kaito wanted was one he thought was implicit, but...there was strength in saying those basic things too.

Kokichi sat up on his knees and shuffled slightly to face Kaito, his eyes gleaming like gems in the dark. “...Kai-chan. I swear, on my honor as an Ouma, on the bonds of our marriage, on my dignity as a person--I will never abandon you. I will do all that I can to protect you, to make sure you will always have a roof over your head, food in your stomach, and love in your heart. That the home we make together will always be a place for you to come back to, no matter what you do, or however far you go. I swear it.”

Letting his serious words settle for a moment, Kokichi huffed, leaning in towards Kaito, his gaze even more intense. “And it is not conditional. I swear those things to you, yes, because I love you, but irrevocably because you are a person. I swear these things to you, because you are alive, and that is already the greatest act of giving you could do. Your life is not an exchange. Your happiness is not a dependent factor. Your comfort is not on rent.”

“You will have these things no matter what, and I mean those words to their full, literal meaning.”

Kokichi sat back, giving Kaito a little space. “...I mean it.”

Kaito stilled a bit, staring at Kokichi. Still something so aggressive in him. The first time he had (thought he had) heard those words, they had meant everything to him. No one had ever said anything like that to him before, and Kokichi had told him that during a time where he had felt really vulnerable and out of his depth, trying desperately to salvage his relationships as, one by one, everyone started attacking each other. Everyone was dying. Everyone was literally dying. It had meant so much to him…

This time he felt anxious and aggressive. Something defensive in him, paranoid about Kokichi’s intentions, looking for hidden meanings and loopholes and signs of some massive, future betrayal that Kaito was just going to ignore until it was too fucking late…

...but by the time Kokichi finished, Kaito felt that anxious aggression bleed out. Maybe by this point it was painfully naive, but Kokichi was easy to believe. His husbands good nature and love and sincerity hard to distrust. Kokichi wasn’t the type… he wasn’t. Kaito knew that.

...a few months ago Kaito might have argued, hotly, that Shuichi wasn’t the type either, to keep secrets that could hurt him so badly. Maybe he’d keep secrets on other people, but not Kaito. Shuichi loved Kaito. He would never…

Kaito put the boot down and put his head in his hands. Curling his knees into his chest as he hid his face in the space between them.

“I believe you.” Kaito said… before growling, “But if you break it, you are never hearing from me again. Okay? I’m not… doing this anymore. I can’t. I can’t. I can’t keep just letting people… I’m so tired of this, Kokichi…”

Kokichi took a deep breath and nodded gravely, not trying to think ahead or overanalyze, just taking in this moment, now, Kaito right in front of him. Hurting, but Kokichi was just taking the words he was saying now.

“Okay,” Kokichi said simply. “You shouldn’t have to take it. You shouldn’t have had to take it…” For a moment, Kokichi’s expression was pained, his heart indulging too much in empathy to stay being a strong rock, but he took another breath. “Breaking that vow to you would be breaking who I am as a person, everything I stand for. That weight means everything to me, because that weight is your pain. And I cannot abide by it.”

“But you should never have to pay for my own follies. So don’t take it.”

“Just know that I will always do everything in my power to make sure you are never put in that position.” Kokichi let his voice drop into something softer as he shuffled forward, gently putting his hands on Kaito’s legs. “...okay?”

“...okay.” Kaito said softly, pulling his face up and giving Kokichi a sheepish, but fragile look. Putting his hands over Kokichi’s and squeezing them, “I’m sorry I asked you to say it… I just had a kind of tough conversation with Byakuya. And I just… no one feel safe right now. Nothing feels like a sure thing. I just… I just don’t…”

Kaito sighed, knocking his head into his knees a little. “I’m tired of being taken by surprise. I feel humiliated. I was never supposed to be this person… not the dad thing! Or the ‘being your husband’ thing! I love those things, you and Miyako and… the aspects of our family growing and settling down? Has literally been one of the greatest things in my life. Maybe the greatest thing. I’d struggle to name anything that even contends with it. You guys make me happy.”

“But I just… feel small and weak and vulnerable all the time. I never wanted to… I don’t like feeling like I’m helpless to everything.” Kaito huffed, looking annoyed with himself. “I feel pathetic. Worse than that, I’m starting to think I’ve always been pathetic. And that sucks.” Kaito pouted, just incredibly annoyed now. With himself, the world, everything. “I wanted to be the hero, dammit. I wanted to be strong…”

“It’s alright. I don’t mind reaffirming that kind of stuff to you.” There might’ve been more Kokichi could say to that, the conversation tipping to the point of softer, sweeter words, but the words died in his throat as Kaito told him what had set this off.

Byakuya…

Months of no contact, and when he finally deigns to call it’s just to be a raging asshole...ugh. Kokichi didn’t even have to know what they talked about to know that was the truth.

(He sort of wanted to...go and give Byakuya a horrible nightmare that night. But it’s a fleeting hot flash of anger.)

Mouth set in a frown, Kokichi reached up and slowly started running his fingers through Kaito’s hair, scratching gently at the nape of his neck. “I’m sorry… It…” Kokichi huffed. “Frankly, it pisses me off that there’s stuff in the world that makes you feel like that. It’s not fair...Kai-chan deserves to be happy and strong and carefree…”

Leaning forward, Kokichi kissed at Kaito’s forehead. “But even if you don’t feel like it, you are strong, and you’re far from pathetic. It sucks accepting that you’ve been hurt, and that it wasn’t from your own mistakes. That it was other people elbowing in on your life, through no fault of your own.”

“But that doesn’t make you helpless. And it doesn’t make you weak,” Kokichi said carefully, trying to meet his husband’s eyes. “It means you’re strong beyond measure. Especially since you took people trying to tear you down, and refused to let it harden your heart. You experienced foolish cruelty, and still showed others kindness and warmth and compassion and bravery and hope. That’s stronger than anything the people who hurt you can comprehend, and it’s their monumental loss that they wasted their efforts instead of trying to build you up.”

“It hurts. It can feel helpless and hopeless. But you made it through, and made happiness elsewhere.” Kokichi leaned in, smiling softly. “I can’t think of anything more heroic, honestly.”

“...” Kaito gave Kokichi a long look, before laughing lightly, grabbing him and scooping him up, pulling him into his lap and hugging him fiercely, “You’re too much, did you know that? Ugh… UGH!” Kaito groaned, too loudly, before chuckling into Kokichi’s shoulder, “A part of me hopes that woke Shuichi up and he’s just staring at the closet, judging us.”

Chuckling again at his own stupid joke, Kaito sat back, giving Kokichi an appreciative look. “Thanks, ‘Kichi. It helps to hear stuff like that. Ugh…” Kaito thumped his head on the wall a little, sighing as he stared vaguely at his husband through the dark. Ethereal… Kokichi always looked ethereal… “...I yelled at him.” Kaito admitted. “It got ugly.”

Kokichi smiled more, hugging Kaito back just as tight and nuzzling him, feeling like things were better when Kaito wanted this kind of closeness. He knew he could get a little overwhelming, but Kokichi would never hesitate to reassure his partners. About their safety or his love or their strength...it didn’t matter. It was easy to forget to say the basic truths, but it meant everything to be reminded of them.

He laughed softly along with Kaito, nuzzling him more, but he settled down when Kaito tipped his head back, sensing that it was time for one more part of this to unravel. And what it was…

Kokichi’s eyes widened in surprise, but it wasn’t long before they glistened with pride as well. “...I bet he really deserved it. I know I’m biased against your brother, but...I believe that. ...I’m really proud of you. That’s something that’s not easy to do.”

“Yeah, well… the guy…” Kaito frowned, exhaustion bleeding back into his expression as his words trailed off. “...geez, Kokichi. He makes me hate myself. Even just… I don’t know what to do about him. I want to hate him, but I just… don’t. And that just leaves me hating me. I should… I should want to kill him. He…” Kaito grit his teeth, “...he killed our parents. My mother and father are dead.”

“And… I’m still just trying to talk to him. I don’t… what’s wrong with me? If this shit was happening to you? And you were reacting like I am? I’d be so fucking mad.” Kaito knew, his chest heating with rage at the mere idea. “I’d be furious. I’d be mad at you, mad at him, mad at everyone who wasn’t mad. And instead of being mad, I’m just… pretending like things could still be normal. Like I can still go on thinking that despite everything, I can be confident that Byakuya at least cared about me. That he’d… avoid hurting me. Even if it meant he wouldn’t get what he wanted. Or that it’d be harder. He wouldn’t…”

“I knew he didn’t love our parents.” Kaito confessed, “Mom loved him. Mom loved him. But Byakuya’s relationship with her got destroyed when she ignored the Tengan stuff. He despised her for it. And he thought dad was a dangerous idiot. Every time he talked about them, he had this look of disdain and disgust on his face, and he barely kept those expressions off when they were right in front of us. Byakuya used to say they were everything wrong with our country… I remember thinking he sounded so smart and intelligent and mature when he said stuff like that. I thought he meant that when it was his turn he was going to be better. Learn from their mistakes.”

“...I didn’t think it meant he would kill them.” Kaito said softly. “I still can’t really believe it. It sounds so fake. Mom’s perfect, golden boy, Dad’s heir, killing them. And Kaede. I knew she was ambitious, that she thought she’d make a good queen, that she didn’t like my parents and had issues with Byakuya’s politics, but I never thought…”

“And then Byakuya started talking about how I should give up the Momota name. That if he had his way I’d have been disowned by now, lost my title… he won’t even acknowledge Miyako’s title. And I just… it’s literally the bare minimum. Being a part of the Momota family, having the Momota name, was supposed to mean you were safe. That you’d protect each other, keep your place in society, that you wouldn’t get taken advantage of or stolen or abused or killed… it was the bare minimum of what being a Momota was supposed to mean. And none of them kept to it.”

“And I feel gross and disgusting, how badly I just want to forgive them.” Kaito said softly. “I just wish one of them would say something that would make it all okay.”

Kokichi’s expression hardened a little, but he rested his head on Kaito’s chest, trying not to let his husband see. Kaito just needed to vent right now. Ever since that first letter Kokichi had ever gotten from Byakuya, he’d known. He had been disgusted with how Byakuya treated Kaito, completely disregarding him and acting like he was an idiot that couldn’t do anything for himself. Because of Kaito’s love, Kokichi really had tried to see it differently, hoping that it was rude bluster and that everything really did come from a place of genuine love, but...it just wasn’t true.

Byakuya was just an asshole. Someone who, at the very end of it all, did have noble goals, but the ways he believed he would achieve them, and the little things that built up who he was as a person and didn’t contribute towards those goals were just...cruel madness. Not insanity in the way that a person couldn’t control themself, but...insanity in that there was a complete lack of compassion and consideration, and knowingly.

It was the kind of insanity that Kokichi had trouble comprehending from people in Luminary. It wasn’t the fact that they were backed into a corner, or that it was the only way for something much greater. It was just...casually cruel for the sake of not having to try anything else.

Honestly, it was something that Kokichi had wanted to write off completely. But even though he would still respect those lives…

Kokichi sighed and stroked Kaito’s hair more. “...I’m sorry he couldn’t live up to your expectations. That none of them could. I wish they had...your expectations are wonderful things.”

“...Kai-chan’s love is really powerful, so...if you want to forgive them, then that means you can see something in them worthy of it. They can’t take back what they did, and I don’t think they can make it better. It’s just...not okay. There’s no excuse for what they did. But...there’s always a chance for them to work and one day really earn your forgiveness. And maybe they’ll be able to achieve that.”

Kokichi sighed softly before wrinkling his nose. “...he really wanted you to give up your name? He really is the biggest moron.”

Kaito laughed gently, leaning into the strokes, finding comfort in Kokichi’s little soothing motions. “...yeah. It’s not like the Ouma name, not really. But the Momota name is supposed to mean certain things too, and…in the end, I wasn’t loyal. I… I picked Maki over my brother. I didn’t warn him. And on top of that… it’s just a bunch of little things adding up. It doesn’t matter, and that’s why I haven't brought it up yet, but how we’re choosing to name our children has, like… political implications, in Luminary. It just says things about our power dynamics. It doesn’t matter, I don’t care… in hindsight, I just see now how I should have seen this conversation coming. Of course Byakuya would want me to give up the name. He’d disown me if he could. I betrayed him.”

Kokichi sighed, feeling...uncertain. There were words forming in his throat, but...they felt mean.

But Kaito didn’t want him to hold back anymore.

“...maybe the Momota name meant things once, but...you just said yourself that no one in your family upheld those meanings. I know that doesn’t translate completely, that there’s a reason people in Luminary still wanted Kaede as queen because of her name. But…” Kokichi huffed. “If people can pick and choose what meanings they want to care about, then...to me, at least, that’s a sign it doesn’t actually mean anything. So...you acted as Kaito, the thing that actually means something, and did what you thought was right. What you cared most for. And that’s something noble and admirable that people should sit up and take notice of.”

“It might explain why Byakuya made that call, but he’s ignorant to have done so, and so is anyone else who would think about our family power dynamics like that.” Kokichi tipped his head back and looked at Kaito’s profile, affection and conviction in his gaze. “You and Shuu-chan and Maki-chan and Tim and Miya are Luminary citizens. But you’re Dicean citizens too, and we live in Dicea. When it comes into conflict...it would make no sense to follow Luminary laws and not Dicean ones. Anyone who would think Tim and Miya’s last names mean anything about the structure of our family is ignorant.”

Kokichi gave Kaito a look. “...that doesn’t mean it’s malicious. It’s not disparaging, unless it’s willful ignorance. It just means they have lacking knowledge. If they had all the knowledge, then they’d know that a child’s last name comes either from the parent that birthed them, or an agreement in the adoption forms. You never signed adoption forms for Tim, so legally, he doesn’t have your last name. You didn’t birth Miyako, so she doesn’t have your last name. That’s the meaning there. And the people who think that it means anything else are ignorant.”

“I know,” Kaito said, nuzzling his head into Kokichi’s shoulders, sighing, “I know, I know… Tim’s not even legally mine. Which eats me up sometimes, but… that’s just how it is. And I know our kids aren’t going to have my name because of a bunch of reasons that aren’t you guys, like… telling the world my place in the family. I know that. They’d know that, if literally anyone would ask. Or listen. Or gave a shit.”

Kaito sighed, feeling a little exasperated with himself now. “I’ve been whining for awhile, huh… I’m sorry about all of this babe. I know you don’t mind, but… I wish all of this didn’t get to me the way it does. I shouldn’t have taken his call in the first place. Guy ignores me for months, and wants to just pretend like we don’t have things we need to talk about. And then just shit all over me and say a bunch of… ugh. My dads a total creep, by the way. Apparently there were absolutely some signs I totally missed before I found all that out from your dad, because apparently, my dad was not subtle about it. He was creeeeeeepy.”

Kokichi kissed Kaito’s head and wrapped his arms around him, hugging him close. Honestly...a lot of the legal issues were a lot easier now. Kaito could probably get on the adoption papers for Tim now. But that was an entirely different conversation and...Kokichi knew that even though there were logical reasons...it was still something that was going to bother Kaito.

Even illogical, they were things that mattered, and they still had the potential to hurt. But hopefully that feeling would be unnoticable most days.

“It’s alright, I’m glad we could talk about it,” Kokichi hummed to Kaito’s apology. “We all need a moment, sometimes.” And Kaito had a very, very good reason to need this moment. Since Kaito did still want a relationship with his brother, Kokichi thought that it would’ve been immature more than anything to ignore the call, but...maybe it would be a good idea to stop talking to Byakuya for a while. Wait until Byakuya grew up a little before trying again.

...the issue with Kaito’s dad was...well, Kaito wasn’t exactly laughing, but Kokichi was glad he was up to being irreverent. Being able to laugh at it was probably the best catharsis he could get.

Kokichi made a sound sort of like, “Eeeugh,” before cuddling more against Kaito’s chest. “That’s all such a...weird, creepy situation. ...I’m really glad neither of us are like our dads.”

“Riiiiiight? I mean, in comparison? Your dad is so much better than, like… literally everyone else in my family.” Kaito chuckled dryly, just resting his head against Kokichi’s neck. It was nice to do that, sometimes. It was just nice to be held. “But man, he is lucky that I am comparing him to arguably some of the worst family members on earth. I can’t even be, like, huffy and condescending towards him for the shit he pulled on us. Like… what he put us through was so fucking careless and pointless, and fucking… self-centered. But at least he wasn’t trying to get his fucking jollies off on us. Like, he thought he was doing the right thing, at least. I can’t even imagine what my dad told himself. I can’t… I literally can’t imagine it. How do you tell yourself that stuff is okay…?”

Kaito shifted slightly, and leaned his head back, letting Kokichi relax more into him, rubbing his back as Kaito held him, staring at the opposite wall a bit. He wasn’t feeling as emotional now, he mostly just felt… exasperated was probably the best word. He was so exasperated. All the stupid little ways his lovd ones had just so dramatically hurt him. Ridiculous.

“...when I hurt you…” Kaito said softly, that small squeeze of uncertainty in his stomach again, “...I think I convinced myself that you’d be okay with it. My whole world shook when you started crying… I was horrified. I couldn’t believe I had done something so terrible to you… how could I do something that would hurt you so badly? How did I possibly think it was okay? I was so ashamed… maybe that’s why they all did those things. Maybe some part of them thought that it wouldn’t hurt like it was obviously going too. Maybe they just never realized how badly they were hurting other people.”

Kokichi sighed and rolled his eyes a little, agreeing enormously that, in terms of comparing in-laws, Aiichi got the kindest comparison in the world. “My dad is just...such a dunderhead. I really wouldn’t wanna blame his caretakers at his orphanage, so...I think there was always just gonna be a core part of him that’s completely idiotic. It seems to line up, anyway, from the stories I’ve heard about his childhood...there was only so much a guiding hand could do.”

Aiichi had taken a debonair shot in the dark adding a marriage proposal in with the peace treaty, and...knowing his dad more now? Kokichi bet that Aiichi had added it in just because it was so common in history. Getting better relations through marriage, never mind that Kokichi had truly not been ready for something like that, and not realizing the full scope of what Luminary was like. It had been so, so careless...even if it had been well-intentioned. It was pure dumb luck that he and Kaito had managed to find something for themselves in it.

(...Kokichi wondered what would’ve happened if they got the treaty without the marriage. If Dicea would’ve remained blissfully unaware of Luminary’s issues while… Would Byakuya have still killed their parents if Kaito had been in the country? Kokichi couldn’t think why not. And the revolution...would it have been put off a few years, Kaede working to truly get Maki out of her contract to be her posterchild? That Kokichi really didn’t know…)

(...he didn’t see much that their non-marriage would’ve changed, in the grand scheme. So...Kokichi was just glad that he got his family in a safer place. And, of course, that they met. He wouldn’t trade that for the world.)

Kokichi hummed pleasantly when he felt Kaito start to rub his back, nuzzling in more against his chest, though he sighed. There were a lot of reasons people would do horrible, unforgivable things, he’d learned. For fun was the worst. But...following up on it was...that there was no reason. That there hadn’t been any thought put to it at all. And while Kokichi had a sinking feeling that that was a major ‘reason’ Kaito’s parents had (at the very least, Kaede and Byakuya had cruel ambition)...

“Maybe,” he gently agreed. “One of the first things you ever told me was how ‘elites’ had the biggest trouble interacting with others. So...maybe they really just never saw it. Not in a way they understood.”

“Yeah. Our classes are usually so separated, that you kinda have to go out of your way to meet anyone below it, in a meaningful way.” Kaito said, pausing to listen for a second. Any sounds of baby? Shuichi moving? Nothing. Good. “People in lower classes avoid people in upper classes because it can be really dangerous to get close to people like that. Better to be invisible than potentially get their ire. And people in upper classes just have all these… shitty ideas about lesser classed people. Like its degrading to be seen mingling with them unless you’re using them for something. It could get really, really stupid.”

“I was so smitten with Shuichi and Maki though.” Kaito said softly. Old, vague memories soothing him. “They were so incredible… I think ten year old me fell in love with them on sight. Who knows why… I was a little lonely those days. I didn’t have any close friends and Kaede and Byakuya were just on a whole different level than me. But that still didn’t really explain how fixated I got on them. Intelligent, wary golden eyes and a fierce, dangerous red gaze… I couldn’t get enough of them. I did everything in my power to spend more time with them. It was all I wanted in the world, Maki and Shuichi’s approval. I loved them so quickly.”

“I fall in love quickly.” Kaito laughed, before sighing, “But nothing compares to my feelings for you three… Togami, Korekiyo, Monique… Chad…” In its own awful, ugly way, Byakuya. “Nothing comes close. Sometimes it feels like you three are my whole world.”

Kokichi really didn’t understand it. It’s how it was in Luminary, so he had to be aware of it, but...it never stopped feeling like some weird, giant game of pretend. The lines people in Luminary drew between each other seemed so...arbitrary and fragile. He didn’t understand how such vast wealth discrepancies even began, and he didn’t understand why some things ancestors did were considered so superior, when there was such brilliance and nobility in people you could find almost everywhere. Why that superiority lingered when the people alive in the current day had done nothing in the same vein.

By seeing Shuuichi and Maki’s fear, hell, even today hearing Kaito need that reassurance that he would be safe, Kokichi could understand why it was so rare for people who the system deemed didn’t have power didn’t speak up. But...even if Kaede was a leader, so many people had spoken up. So...maybe that complete disconnect, like the different Luminary classes weren’t even living on the same planet, let alone the same country would change too.

Especially with people like Kaito helping out. People who looked outside of the norm.

“...I’ve always thought it was amazing, how you and Shuu-chan and Maki-chan had been able to find each other…” Kokichi sighed softly and kissed the shell of Kaito’s ear. “...I had never loved a person like I do with you guys before...and that’s your point too. But...I really love Dicea, you know? There are all sorts of things you could say but...to me, it really feels like I was born to care for Diceans.”

Kokichi closed his eyes, his heart welling with purpose and emotion. “...but it feels like I was born to meet you guys too. To love you and Shuu-chan as partners, and Maki-chan as a sister… Everything just...feels like it’s right as it should be when we’re together. I know we’re pretty terrible at understanding each other’s feelings, but...I really think we’re on the same page here.”

“Heh,” Kaito grinned, flushing slightly at the kiss against his ear. Soft… “Well, I always knew competing against a whole country was going to be tough, but… I don’t mind. My Kokichi’s idea of dividing his attention is much more generous than I was imagining. And so long as you're happy with us…” Kaito hesitated, before amending, “As long as you don’t take anything out on us? That’s the best I can hope for. It’s all I want, really…”

“...I mean, you can take some things out on me.” Kaito grinned, taking his hand and tilting Kokichi’s chin up, stealing some kisses, that graze against his ear just a little much for warm-blooded man. Kissing him gently, lingering as he indulged himself, before laughing, kissing the curve of Kokichi’s jaw and the side of his neck, “And Shuichi too, when he’s up to it. But, like, ya know… when you’re done spending all day with Dicea… you can take anything out on us you want, really…”

It wasn’t a real bite, not like the kind Kaito might give when he was actually revving up to go. More teasing than anything as he grazed his teeth against Kokichi’s neck, murmuring, “Maybe ask me to take some things out on you… your Kaito’s always up to working hard for the leader…”

Kokichi snorted softly. “Believe me… If I even start getting a little snippy with your guys ‘cause I’m stressed out from work? It’s gonna break my heart and I’m gonna spend weeks trying to make it up to you. I never want how I act to you guys to be an outcome of something else…”

Some of it was a little inevitable. Compartmentalizing that much was probably incredibly unhealthy, and it just wasn’t something achievable for Kokichi in the first place. But if he was feeling stressed or frustrated, he wanted to be able to gently explain that to his family, and maybe take some time to himself to cool off...or maybe get some help with that.

Kaito was...very good at stress relief.

Humming happily into their kisses, Kokichi stroked his hand up and down Kaito’s side, not really trying to start anything up, but wanting to be affectionate. Wanting to be there and present for something like this, too.

He tilted his head to the side, giving out some pleased, breathy sighs as Kaito kissed and grazed his teeth down Kokichi’s neck and...damn. Damn. He looked at Kaito out of the corner of his eye with a grin. “...maybe one of those times we ask Maki-chan or Ikuo to watch Miya...we can go relax together, hm?”

“Nuh uh.” Kaito said, in a moment of-- very likely eventually regretful--, inspiration. Letting his hands wander a little as he bit, ever so lightly, but more intently, on Kokichi’s neck. Brushing his lips against the slightly reddened skin, and while it wasn’t really necessary for a bite like this, soothingly pressing the tip of his tongue against it, just briefly, before kissing that spot again. All the motions of creating a hickey, without quite following through as he said, “Someone said nine months, and I’ve made my peace with that. Wouldn’t want to go back on our agreement.”

“Maybe Shuichi will help you out,” Kaito grinned, running his hands down around the edges of Kokichi’s ass, squeezing as he stole another kiss, “Or there’s always your right hand… my poor Kokichi. Gonna have to get by…”

Kokichi raised an eyebrow, looking at Kaito in bafflement since...that was the last thing he would’ve expected from his husband. And while his breath caught and a shudder went down his spine as Kaito went back to working on his neck, Kokichi pouted. “Geez...you get caught up in thinking you can’t leave your daughter alone for a second and suddenly your husband’s declaring a vow of celibacy. Too bad...I figured it would’ve been really nice stress relief. I’m gonna miss those cute Kai-chan sounds when I’m swallowing his cock down my throat. Will have to make do with the memories, I guess.”

Squirming in Kaito’s lap as he squeezed his ass, Kokichi nibbled at Kaito’s lip, just barely dipping the tips of his fingers past Kaito’s waistband. “Wonder where I’ll end up… Definitely not one of the public bathrooms. Maybe I’ll start taking trips to the hot tub by myself...mm, but I’m not gonna wanna do that in the middle of summer…”

...Oh, what a god damn cheat.

Kaito’s face burnt bright red, genuinely taken off guard, like he always was when Kokichi talked like that. And already his head was swimming in the images Kokichi put there… he bit his lips and after making a very unbecoming sound in the back of his throat, said, “Y-yeah, well, you’re just gonna have to… figure it out! Shame for you! Hot down there…”

Kaito had literally just started this game, he wasn’t losing right out the gate! The cheat.

Kaito, in a valiant act of self control, took his hands away from Kokichi’s ass and put them on his chest-- not coping a feel! Okay maybe a little bit.-- and pushing his husband back a little. Flustered and steaming red as he looked away and grumbled, flustered, “We’re gonna be doing, just… wholesome things with our time off. Like… crocheting. And… flower sniffing. No dick sucking… or putting squirming, squealing ‘Kichi’s on their backs… seeing all the fun ways he bends… god you're flexible…” Kaito’s gaze went far away for a moment, clearly lost in his own head, “... Shuichi’s gonna be feeling better too… for crochet.”

Kokichi just grinned as Kaito pushed him back, and he let himself slide, taking the opportunity to stretch himself across Kaito’s lap, tilting his head up to gaze at his husband. It probably wasn’t a genius idea to try and rile Kaito up right now when they definitely weren’t going to do anything, but...well! Kaito had provoked him! And Kokichi wasn’t gonna lose!

“Hm...never really had the patience for knitting...think I told you once. But my Kai-chan already knows that,” Kokichi crooned. “He’s well aware of his greedy ‘Kichi, always trying to speed on ahead.”

He grinned a little more, not sure if Kaito’s tangent was supposed to affect Kokichi or himself more, before Kokichi let out a sigh. “Trust me, I’ll be ecstatic if Shuu-chan wants to do stuff, but I’m not counting on it. He can set the pace, when it comes to doing stuff together. Though…” Kokichi lowered his eyes, “Shuu-chan can set a pretty brutal pace when we’re together.”

Kaito gave Kokichi an exaggeratedly annoyed look at his little slide, before his face burnt a little hotter, eyebrows shooting up in surprise as he asked, “...he does? Wait, wait, wait, I need context! Context. So, like… when I’m picturing you two together, without me, it’s always real sweet and kinda awkward and you two are just blushing at each other all the time and…”

Kaito’s eyes went far away again. Now just entirely lost in the daydream, his words trailing off… before he had to cover his eyes a little, digging his palms into them a bit. Waaaaay too heated up. “...anyway! Yeah, so…I mean, I know our Shuichi can get real hard on me, sometimes. Does he do that to you?” Kaito asked, letting his hands drop and staring at Kokichi with amused, if slightly too focused eyes.

Kokichi watched his husband fondly as he got himself worked up imagining Kokichi and Shuuichi together, and he took the opportunity to stretch out, letting his voice squeak in the back of his throat as he sighed, stretching his arms up over his head and making sure his shirt rode up just a little. “Do you picture us a lot, Kai-chan?”

Tipping his head to the side, Kokichi looked up at Kaito coyly. “Mm...I dunno if I’d call it hard. Shuu-chan just gets very curious, you know? He’s anything but shy when he has a question he needs answers to.”

“I…” Kaito’s eyes dipped to the skin beneath Kokichi’s shirt, the thin angles of his hips bones and that small, purple happy trail suddenly Kaito’s entire world-view as he put one hand against the side of Kokichi’s face, soothingly rubbing his thumb along his cheek and temple, while his other hand went to Kokichi’s stomach. Rubbing his large, warm hands against the cool skin of his husband, his other thumb petting down the thin line of hair there. “...have a very rich inner-life, in which you and Shuichi are very active participants…”

Kaito kept soothingly rubbing his thumb up and down Kokichi’s face, running his fingers against the nap of Kokichi’s neck in a little massage, as if maybe if he kept his husband comfortable and soothed, Kokichi might not notice or not care the suddenly dangerous heat coming off of him. A little too riled up, his focused gaze on Kokichi’s skin as Kaito pushed his shirt up a little more, running his hands over it, looking to Kokichi’s waistband as he started to let his hand dip…

“Ah, that’s one of the things I really love about you, you know? There’s a whole world in you.” Kokichi smiled sweetly, lovingly, reaching up to cup Kaito’s cheek. He enjoyed this game, and it looked like he won, but...he really just loved Kaito. With all the scary, helpless moments, and soft moments, and quiet moments.

Gently, Kokichi placed a hand over the one about to dip beneath his pants and held it, smiling up at Kaito. “...we’ll find time for each other, but now is not the time. We should go check on Miya.”

Kaito blinked as Kokichi grabbed his hand, staring at his husband in dumb confusion for a moment… before after a moment the haze lifted, and he said, “W-well, obviously not now… w-we still have nine months to go! Honestly, Kokichi, your head is just always in the gutter.”

Kaito huffed, like his skin wasn’t still blazing hot and his stomach wasn’t tight, but drew up his husband into his arms, hugging him tightly and kissing at his face, before taking a moment, breathing deeply… calm… calm… calm…

Letting out an easier breath, Kaito kissed Kokichi again, before starting to shift up, getting to his feet, “Right. Miya. Gotta go make sure the itty-bitty baby’s good. Itty-bitty sleepy baby…”

Kokichi snickered quietly and hugged Kaito back, holding back the impulse to nuzzle, knowing that Kaito was trying to cool off. Definitely the winner. But they’d had their moment, and it was time to be adults again, checking on their daughter and their partner and getting back into the swing of things.

And have lunch. And Kokichi needed to check on Nini.

Giving Kaito another kiss after his, Kokichi got up and quietly opened the closet door, giving a little sigh when there were still no angry gurgles or tired groans. Padding over to the crib, Kokichi let out a little sigh, Miya peacefully snoozing away.

“I should have killed him,”

“Maki, it really doesn’t help to hear you say that.”

“I don’t care. I should have done it.” Maki said darkly, Kaito just sighing next to her as they continued to pack the lunches, setting up the plates on the platter to bring upstairs. “I knew he was going to continue to be a problem if I let him live.”

“He’s my brother, Maki. And him making me feel bad sometimes isn’t a ‘problem’... or at least not a murder-worthy one.”

“It wouldn’t have been murder, it would have been an execution. There would have been a crowd of onlookers. People would have cheered.”

“...” Kaito sighed, a tired resignation on his face, “Maki, that doesn’t help. It just makes me sad…”

“Stop. Loving him.” Maki said, glaring at him as the two grabbed some desserts, keeping their voices low as people shuffled too and from tables around them, the two trying their best not to be overheard. “You know if you were me, you’d be telling yourself the same thing. Loving Byakuya is madness. He’s a terrible person who ruins everything he touches, and that includes you. You shouldn’t give him the opportunities to do it.”

“It’s not that easy. He… he did a lot of good things for me in my life. I can’t just forget all of that.”

“Literally name one thing.”

“He got you and Shuichi out of your contracts.”

“...” Maki opened her mouth to argue against that, but just frowned. A frustrated, annoyed look flashing over her face, but not really having any useful thing to say against it. The two heading out of the dining hall.

“...he only did that because you were going into a warzone--”

“Yes, right, if you’re about to say he only did it because he wanted to protect me, and not you guys, then yes, you’re right. And if you’re going to argue that him wanting to keep me safe is its own form of narcissistic ownership thing, yes, fine, I get that too. But it's still… his motivations might not have always been the best, but he still looked out for me when a lot of other people didn’t. And I’m not ungrateful. I can’t just suddenly forget it all.”

“You can do better than someone who thinks protecting you indebts you to them.” Maki frowned. “Someone protecting you doesn’t mean you owe them. It takes more than protection to earn someone’s affection. You think I would have bothered listening to all of your problems and helping you through hard times and taking an interest in your latest weird hobby if protecting you was all that was necessary to get close to you?”

“Well, okay, comparing him to you isn’t fair, you’re my best frien--”

“He’s your brother.” Maki suddenly snarled, shooting him a heated look, “That obligates him to try harder. That doesn’t mean he gets a pass at the bare minimum of taking care of a person.”

“... ugh. Do you wanna dance later?”

“Do you think you’ll have time?”

“I dunno. I can ask. But this feels like a conversation that could end up getting heated if we talk about it too long.” Kaito admitted, shrugging, “A part of me knows your right. If this was Shuichi talking about Nao, I’d be losing my mind on him right now, it’d make me so angry.”

“Kokichi might be a better comparison. He did grow up with her.” Maki said, “If you have time later today, we’ll dance. Gotta work on that routine anyway.”

“...what do you think about Nao?” Kaito suddenly asked, realizing he and Maki had never had this conversation, “After everything that happened… you actually got to see it, once. And you don’t talk about her as much as I do…”

“...” They got to the third floor, and Maki slowed down, giving herself a moment to think about it. “...I think the difference between how I feel about Nao and how I feel about Byakuya comes from ‘presence’. Nao might as well be dead right now, we haven't heard from her in almost a year and she hasn’t done anything to aggravate any of you beyond just the things she already did. If she became a problem? I’d want to kill her again. But she’s not, so I don’t really think about her at all.”

“Byakuya, in turn, called you the day you brought your baby home from the hospital to tell you that he effectively wanted to disown you, but in a way where you’d still be his. And sent you crying in a closet. So, yes… now I have regrets about not killing him. Because he is still hurting you.”

“How did this come back to talking about Byakuya again?” Kaito grumbled, “Can’t we ever just bond over other people we hate? That sounds more fun than talking about Byakuya.”

“Would you like to talk about Chad?”

“Ugh… why am I friends with you?”

“Because we both put the time in already, for a long time now.” Maki said simply, “Because later today I’m going to subject myself to more dancing to tell you that your brother is an asshole and you should emotionally distance yourself from him. Because that’s what actually taking care of someone looks like, and your brother wouldn’t recognize that even if it was written down as trade policy and put on his damn desk.”

Kaito used his free hand to open the door, calling out softly, “It’s food time. Is everyone awake and hungry?”

Kokichi glanced up, giving Kaito and Maki both a smile before he focused back down on Miya. There had been some crying and fussing when he woke her up for her own lunch, but at this point she was suckling peacefully on her bottle, Kokichi keeping her supported. And...not exactly warm, as Kokichi had decided to start up what they talked about earlier, and was feeling Miya shirtless, her out of her little blanket bundle.

“Heeeey, look who it is, Miya~ Dad and Aunt Maki-chan are here. You’ll get to say hello before it’s nap time again.”

Glancing up again, Kokichi eyed the trays Kaito and Maki brought up this time. “Mmm, what’s for lunch?”

“Chicken pasta.” Kaito said, “With peas and sauce, and some veggie sides. We grabbed some cookies and pudding too, it honestly might be a little too much food for lunch, so whatever you don’t eat I’ll finish. Unless it’s the vegetables. Then you’re getting some hard looks, I’m telling you now.”

Shuichi was in the bathroom, looking himself over in the mirror. Walking was still a little tough, and he was pretty sure he was going to be exhausted again soon, but when he had felt the strength to do it he had finally just wanted a chance to look at himself. He looked… strange. Different. Again. Sigh… still, it wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. He felt so much lighter. Like he could breathe again. Every movement didn’t take some much effort, and when he had woken up, he had discovered he was sleeping on his back, and not his side, which would have felt crushing and awful a few days ago.

...he felt empty. Miyako’s kicking and squirming and punching inside of him absent. That in itself didn’t feel bad, but it didn’t feel good yet either. He just felt strange.

He lifted his shirt a little, and winced at the heavy wrap and bandages, dirty with his injuries. He’d need to change that soon… he’d ask Kaito or Maki for help…

It would still take time to feel ‘normal’. This wasn’t that. But as he watched his shirt hang off of him, putting it down, rather then pressing tightly to his skin, showing off every inch of curve and embarrassing him… it was better. Closer to normal.

But, hearing his friends coming back, Shuichi headed out, moving slow and bracing himself on items as he went, looking to Miyako and Kokichi. “... Kokichi got her to settle down really quickly.” Shuichi praised, as Kaito hurried to lend him his arm, helping him back to the bed. “It was really impressive. Miyako did not wish to be awake yet.”

“Anyone could get grumpy to be woken up when they’re still tired.” Kaito argued in her defense, before grinning over at Kokichi, “And heck yeah Kokichi handled it. Our guys amazing.”

Maki put her plates down, before heading over to Kokichi, giving Miya a calm, pleased look, “She’s eating well. The first few days can be a little difficult to get the babies to eat. They know they’re hungry, but they’re not in the habit of eating yet. I had a sibling who was constantly crying because we had to keep him up longer because he kept refusing the bottle. We ended up having to put formula on our thumbs over and over again and putting it in his mouth, until he got it into his dumb little head that suckling equalled ‘good milk taste’.”

Maki paused, thinking about it, before saying, “That was Jaime, I think. Little idiot. He was a big eater too.”

Kokichi sighed and turned back to Miyako. “Can you believe it? Between hair brushing and eating vegetables, Dad’s not gonna let up on anything. What a woe, having someone who cares so much about our well-being.”

As Shuuichi came out of the bathroom, Kokichi brightened from the praise, looking down at Miyako with a grin. Things with Miya had been going really well. No issues so far, and getting upset and crying when they woke her up wasn’t an issue--it’s just what would happen. But so far they had always been able to calm her down relatively quickly, and...he wasn’t sure. But it really felt like she...somehow understood them. All their reassurances and talking-to-the-void explanations of why things were happening...it felt like she somehow understood it. And…

...Kokichi wasn’t sure, but...sometimes it felt like...she was looking out in confusion, seeking reassurance and...so he’d give it.

He was probably just tired…

Listening to Maki’s anecdote about her sibling, Kokichi laughed softly. “I’m glad Miya’s got it figured out. That’s a good story, though--have you shared it with him? Or other siblings?”

“His older siblings were there, so I haven't shared it with them. I suppose I could tell him about it the next time I see him. He might enjoy it.” Maki said dismissively, clearly unconcerned if she’d remember to do so or not.

“Are you seeing the kids again soon?” Kaito asked, popping some veggies in his mouth after he spent some time coo’ing at Miyako, grinning at her and waving, telling her what a good little baby she was, being good for daddy, such a perfect little baby, Miiiiiya~ all while she stared at him in baffled fascination.

“I’m still working out a schedule. A few of the parents have wanted to talk to me. Apparently some of the kids have shown interest in going to camps, but have decided they need my ‘permission’ to go.” Maki shrugged, sighing as she took a seat at the desk, starting on her own food, “Which, obviously they don’t, but now it’s looking like we all need to sit down and talk out essentially the kids ‘responsibilities’ to me.”

“Should have seen that coming, really.” Shuichi sighed, adjusting his hat as he leaned back and started picking at his food, “Now that you’re officially back? The kids are going to be looking to you for guidance.”

“Guidance is fine. Keeping me informed is best. Permission makes things too complicated.” Maki said, spinning the pasta on her fork, “Their foster parents can’t do their jobs if my siblings expect me to manage them from afar. They need to recognize it’s like the orphanage situation. They come to me when things feel dangerous, or if one of the caretakers needs a… forceful conversation. But if its just things like permission to go to events or doing chores? They need to let their parents be parents. I’m not about to try to replace them, just because the kids trust me more.”

“Trying to manage thirty different kids throughout almost fifteen different households? Yeah, what other choice do you have? That’s impossible.” Kaito sighed, “You know you can hit me up if you need help, right? I can go check on some peeps and do some reassurances.”

“There’s a few kids I think might benefit from joining our training sessions, at least once a week. Or maybe just who I need to seek out more regularly. They seem to need reassurance. I’ll talk to you more about it later.” Maki said, before remembering, “Can I steal Kaito later today for some dancing?” she asked Kokichi and Shuichi, “Maybe an hour at most?”

Kokichi listened to his family chat, but his focus was on Miya, gently taking the bottle away when she’d sucked down all the nectar, cooing over how much of a good girl she was, yes, you had a full meal, good job! Snagging the cloth he’d kept nearby, he turned her over onto his shoulder, gently patting her back, just a little, wanna make sure your tummy’s all settled and comfy, there we go! Wonderful! I can put you back in your warm, comfy blanket again, Mi-Mi, I loooove you.

As he was wrapping her back up, he hummed softly and nodded. “I think the kids would really enjoy seeing you more often--might be easier to answer questions and concerns they have about living in Dicea too.”

“And yeah,” he continued, pressing another hand-kiss to Miya’s head before heading over to get a plate of lunch, a bit eager to start catching up with his family. “That’s fine with me. Would you be alright hanging out here for a bit first, though? I wanna check on Nini after lunch.”

“Of course. Timothy and the girls are preoccupied, they should be fine on their own until Haneda gets on shift. Oh, Kaito?” Maki said, looking to the red head, whose mouth was full of pasta. “He doesn’t seem to want to ask, but Timothy appears uncertain if you two are going to the diner this weekend.”

“Actually, yeah! I was gonna ask if you or Ikou wouldn’t mind watching her then, if my guys here needed help, but yeah, I still want to take Tim out for lunch. It’s important to us, ya know? It’s when he tells me about his week and stuff, he tells me nice things he’s done for people--”

“Oh, you guys finally managed to set that up?” Shuichi mused, “I knew you were struggling with that.”

“That was my fault. Kid doesn’t like to speak up unless I ask, and I just wasn’t asking.” Kaito sighed, “But I’m glad I’m asking these days. The kid does a lot of little things to help out his classmates, it’s really nice to hear about. He’s got a few more friends than just Kimiko and Cali, it seems like he just doesn’t spend time with them outside of class.”

“So busy…” Shuichi said, cutting up his pasta. “You guys exhaust me just looking at you go.”

“Uh huh,” Kaito grinned, giving his boyfriend an amused look, “You’re gonna be up and about soon, handsome. Then you can make your own busy schedule.”

“Never. I’m sleeping for the next year.”

Tossing some of his vegetables in with his pasta--he didn’t even know the kitchen put out plain sides--Kokichi alternated spearing and twirling, keeping quiet as he quickly ate. He figured that Tim was at least friendly with others, that his teacher wasn’t just adding hyperbole, but people he’d call friends too? Maybe he’d want to invite a friend or two over during the summer while Kimiko and Cali were away. Kokichi wasn’t sure if that was an option that hadn’t occurred to Tim, or that he just wanted those people to be school friends. Or maybe he was too cool to invite them over first. Kokichi smirked a little to himself at that thought.

Snorting, Kokichi licked his lips of sauce before raising an eyebrow at Shuuichi. “Busy? I don’t doubt you could sleep for a year, but honey, my next few months are primarily laying around our room hangin’ with the baby. And that’s something we’re all doing to an extent.”

“We’ll see if in a few months you don’t call Miyako’s schedule ‘busy’.” Shuichi chuckled, giving his boyfriend a fond look. “And if it doesn’t feel like a full time job? Then you’ll find something else to fill up your time with. You’re going to end up having Nadya pass you reports in back alleys, both of you wearing trenchcoats and vague, indecipherable accents.”

“If Miyako doesn’t turn out to keep us all busy as heck, then ‘Kichi should take the time to let himself relax anyway.” Kaito frowned, “He’s got the rest of his life to swamp himself in work. Taking time off is a good thing-- especially when this barely even counts as time ‘off’.”

“If anything, I have the most free time available now.” Maki mused, “Timothy mostly just spends his day running around with the other two, so unless you all need me for help with things, I don’t really have much going on.”

Kaito frowned at that, giving Maki a mildly worried look. “...You’re not, like… waiting on my permission to go do stuff, right Maki-roll?”

“Hm?” Maki asked, giving Kaito a brief, genuinely confused look. “No…? Oh. No. It’s nothing like that. Honestly, that feelings been going away on its own. I don’t really know if I need you to make decisions for me anymore…”

“Do you want me to take back my vow?”

“...” Maki’s brow furrowed, something uncomfortable in her face. “...not yet.”

Kaito just nodded at that. Not asking for an explanation. Maki hadn’t actually been deferring to him on anything lately, so the vow had been mostly symbolic these last few weeks anyway. Maybe Maki just felt safer with it.

Kokichi snorted and returned Shuuichi’s fond look. He knew that they all were going to be more than busy with Miya, but...other than her, he didn’t have a lot going on right now. Therapy once a week, and he’d promised to find time for hobbies or just relaxation, but...he supposed he was still feeling a little lost knowing he wouldn’t be working. Even significantly cutting down on his hours over the past year, it was still such a routine for him. Sure he didn’t work when he got sick but...still.

So...he could lament a little about feeling a little lost.

Shoveling a bit more food into his mouth, Kokichi gave Maki a curious look. He really was thankful for her help with Miya, so he didn’t exactly wanna shove her away, but...he was a little worried. She hadn’t gone back to working out at the dojo, she wasn’t really going out to hang out with people...though she did leave sometimes to go out and do things that they didn’t talk much about. He figured she was just enjoying the city, or going into the forest for some peace.

It was...fine. But he still worried about her.

“...Hina and Sakura and the others should be coming back soon, huh? It’ll be nice to see them again.”

“Oh yeah, in two weeks or so, last I heard.” Kaito said, brightening up at that. “Man, it’s weird to think that if Maki had waited to come back with them, we’d still be waiting a few more weeks to see you.”

“There was too many things or them to settle over there for them to get back any sooner. Up to an including they had to finish the ‘class’ they had ‘exchanged too’ in the first place,” Maki said, something incredibly amusing in that. A civil war had been going on, everyone had known that the exchange program was a cover for a political exchange for the siblings, and the paperwork had already been settled for the kids immigrating to Dicea now that they were here… but some secretary in Luminary had still insisted that the ‘exchange students’ needed to finish the agreed upon semester. And the legalities had ended up becoming so confused that, after awhile, the ‘students’ had just agreed to do the class, since that was easier than fighting the paperwork, apparently. “They’re going to come back all knowing a lot more about Luminary metal-work.”

“Ooooooh, yeaaaaaah, metal work… forgot that was the class they were taking.” Kaito said, finishing up his meal. “That’s gonna be kinda cool. Maybe they can teach us what they learned?”

“Do you want to learn metal-work, Kaito?” Shuichi asked.

“I dunno… sounds kinda fun, doesn’t it? Did it once for my birthday. I liked how sorta worn out and grisled I felt afterwards. Felt really accomplished, ya know?” Kaito grinned.

There had been...so much paperwork, all just for formalities. Both countries acknowledging that Dicea wasn’t sending soldiers into the country--though they were--and agreeing while their eyes were cast to the side that the kids were now Dicean citizens. But apparently there was even more for appearances in Luminary, which kind of fit Kokichi’s impression of things over there.

Kokichi sighed and tipped himself back a little, though he didn’t stay down for long, determined to finish his vegetables so Kaito couldn’t give him pouty looks when he went in for dessert. “I think we’ll all be hearing more about metalwork soon...which is what I’d say if I was still working, but, honestly, I think it’ll keep on even when I’m able to come back in. Miu’s still talking about her weird powered carriage project...last time I checked in, she was trying to figure out something she calls an ‘engine’ which would move the carriages without horses… It’s bizarre.”

Right… rails. That was what Kaito had been trying to remember… what had it been? A few weeks ago, a few days ago… Kaito could remember trying to remember something that would have needed, just, so much steel. Too much steel. Enough steel to empty the mountains. Probably not literally, but the idea had still seemed like it would need just a fuck-ton of steel…

Kaito, a genuinely curious look on his face, asked Kokichi, “Babe, does Dicea have a lot of mines?”

Kokichi sighed, his eyes gaining that faraway sharpness that marked his shift into workmode. “I wouldn’t call it a lot, comparing it to other countries’ output… We have access to the mountains all around Dicea, of course, our nations’ lines--between Luminary and Danganronpa--go through the center of the ranges, so we all have access. But...mining is really dangerous, and the transport, especially to anywhere in the south or even to the center of the country is difficult in large quantities. It’s why we import most of our rock and iron...though things got really difficult when the war broke out, since Luminary is such a metal powerhouse over here.”

Glancing up, Kokichi quirked a smile. “We haven’t been able to talk much policy with Luminary yet, but I know the admins are hyped up to talk trade agreements again.”

Kaito had asked sincerely, but he found he wasn’t surprised by the answer. Mining was hard work, and dangerous at that. Dicea’s passion-based workforce probably struggled to recruit for labor like that. Unless you advertised mining as really good exercise? You probably could, actually. Come down for a little bit of power training, some mining, a little bit of stretching and yoga afterwards…

“Something funny, Kaito?” Shuichi asked.

“I’m imagining soot covered miners all just doing yoga together after work.” Kaito grinned.

“...why?” Maki asked.

“I dunno,” Kaito shrugged, “Ya know, your friends idea sounds pretty wild. If its not purely, like, her speculating to ya and stuff? Like if she had blueprints and… what’s the word I’m looking for… resource specs?” Kaito asked, suddenly feeling his ears redden, a little embarrassed. He was doing that thing again… it wasn’t really his place to think about stuff like this… he didn’t really know what he was talking about even as he asked. But… “Uh, yeah, if she’s got stuff like that? You should ask her to send copies to you, babe, I’d love to take a peek at them. It sounds really cool.”

“It sounds impossible.” Maki huffed, “Self moving carriages is sci-fi fiction.”

“Yeah, I might have said the same thing about moving pictures not that long ago. The impossible is possible! S~oooo long as some science guys are making it so.” Kaito grinned, giving Maki a wink.

Kokichi snorted a bit at Kaito’s mental image, always amused by the leaps and jumps his husband managed to get to. Honestly he wouldn’t be surprised if miners did do some sort of bonding through exercise together. Metal and iron--and clay and glass, though those professions were a little more easily filled--were necessary resources, so someone needed to do the job. And there definitely were people who were passionate about it outside of gaining satisfaction through doing necessary work.

There just...weren’t a ton of them. And all the safety precautions, between the constructions and inspections to make sure the mines weren’t in danger of collapse, or that there weren’t any toxins or gas in the air, and scheduling the appropriate amount of working hours to make sure there were always spotters and that the miners weren’t overworking themselves… There wasn’t much output, not compared to the demand of the country. Not to mention the pain of transport, even if importing the goods was in the same boat.

It was probably why so many structures in Dicea were mainly made of wood, since the logging and cultivation industries were much more robust.

But with Luminary an option to trade with for metal again…

Kokichi lit up a little before pouting with a sigh. “It is nuts...but that’s what I said about her plans for the telephone too. I would ask her for plans, but…” Kokichi pouted a little more before looking to the side. “...getting interested in my friend’s plans and asking over personal letters isn’t...work, wouldn’t you say?”

“I mean… your husband did ask ya to do it, babe.” Kaito grinned, giving his husband an amused look as he rested his chin in his palm, “What, is someone gonna tell ya that taking time off work means you ignore my requests? I guess I am a lot of work.”

“True.” Maki said.

“True.” Shuichi agreed.

“Okay, ow. Rude.” Kaito said dryly, scratching his chin before looking over to the crib, lamenting with an over exaggerated sigh, “Do you see how they treat me, Miya? They’re so mean to dad. You gotta grow up big and strong to beat them up for me, baby~”

“You’re gonna sic your infant daughter on us?” Maki asked, her mouth twitching in amusement.

“Heck yeah I am. My buff baby’s gonna kick your butt, too!”

...he did want to send a sketch of Miya to Miu anyway. Miu was the furthest person from sentimental, or even kid-friendly but...she was his friend, and he wanted to share the image of his daughter with her, especially since it wasn’t like she could just stroll into the castle on a weekday-whim and come see her herself. Plus it could be a new element of their bickering to really be one of those parents who never shuts up about their kids.

He’d send her a letter. See what happened.

Popping up to snag one of the cookies that Kaito and Maki had brought up, his veggies eaten in precaution, Kokichi snorted and looked over at Miyako’s crib with fondness. “I hope we can teach her a little diplomacy to start with words before getting physically protective. I’m gonna be astounded the first time she beats me in a debate.”

“You can teach her rigorous debate strategies, ‘Kichi, I will wrestle her until she learns where Dad’s glass jaw is.” Kaito chuckled. “And if she inherited that from me? I’ll show her all the little ways to protect it too!”

“I am… reeling. Over the idea of Miyako one day just getting a lucky hit in at the right angle and you just collapsing.” Maki said, her eyes wide, something that looked dangerously close to actual laughter in her eyes as she smirked slightly, “Bonus points if she’s some ridiculous age, like four.”

Shuichi rolled his eyes, “If she’s going to be learning Kokichi’s debate techniques, I think its far more likely that we’re all about to deal with a constantly arguing little girl, rather then one who manages to get a lucky hook in. I’m gonna be amused the first time Kaito loses a debate with her… at four.”

“Hey! I can defeat any four year old in debate! ...it’s the five year olds ya gotta look out for. They’re getting educated.”

Kokichi raised a playful eyebrow, nibbling at his cookie. “Is that what that is? I will say, it’s far from the first or second spot I’d think to aim a punch in a fight. I think you’re safe, unless she catches you by flailing.”

Sensitive in more than one way, then. Interesting.

Closing his eyes for a moment, Kokichi tried to imagine a future where he taught Miyako the wonderful art of arguing. He knew he wasn’t prepared for her ‘why’ years, but in his fantasy it looked like his partners never getting a moment’s rest while he explained everything under the sun to Miya, and still, and still she’d have more questions.

“...that’s something to talk about later too,” he hummed. “If we wanna have her go to preschool or an educational daycare at any point… Though I doubt between all of us there’s gonna be much time when she’s not being educated in some way.”

“Ooooh, you guys do the pre-school thing too, huh?” Kaito asked, finishing his food but not really interested in the dessert, “Novoselic does that too. It’s not really common in Luminary. All career drafts start at five, education pipelines, sports… starting anything before five is the exception. But its kinda a rule in Novoselic? Fucking everyone goes to pre-school there, it’s wild”

“An educational daycare?” Maki asked, looking somewhat bewildered, “What is… that schooling for infants? How early do Diceans start their education?”

“Career drafts?” Kokichi sighed a little, not really feeling any of the horror or alien-ness that he sometimes got from Luminary customs, but more just mirroring Kaito’s own feelings on the matter. It was wild. “Seriously...I can’t imagine anyone knowing what they’ll want to do in life at five. Hell, some people only start figuring it out when they’re fifty. I was literally declared for a job before I was born, and even then I didn’t figure out that I wanted it until I was a teenager…”

Shaking his head a little, Kokichi looked up to smile at Maki. “It’s not really school, like that. It’s...a way of drawing a distinction between other types of daycares, I guess? Like, a regular daycare is there for people who need someone to watch their kids for certain times, right? Of course the people running it are invested in making sure the kids are safe and having a good time, and especially if a kid ends up going to a daycare regularly, there’s investment into them as a person, but an educational daycare goes a little beyond that.”

“Instead of leaving the kids to it, letting them settle into their own activities, educational daycares have set, like…” Kokichi drew the word out, gesturing his hand in the air vaguely for a moment. “Like...experiences? Sort of like lessons, I guess… But it’s events where the whole day will be about...space, or having an animal control specialist come in and show off and teach about the animals they deal with, or learning ways to help people that are sick, and maybe having a project to make cards or drawings or whatever for people in elderly accommodated living.”

Shrugging a bit, Kokichi explained, “It’s a little like what schools do, but it’s not as regimented, and it’s more like activities a kid can do if they’re interested. But the people who run ‘em are invested in getting people interested in...learning about the world, and being curious. So it all seems pretty enticing.”

Kaito frowned, working the joints in his knuckles a little, “I mean… that sounds good. Right? Like, it sounds like it could be something fun for her to do… I mean, I’d want to do a background check… nevermind, nevermind, that’s not important. Um, yeah! That sounds good. Shuichi?”

“Anything that gives Miyako an advantage when it’s time to get to school is worth pursuing.” Shuichi said simply, “Getting ahead in early education will give her the building blocks she needs to do well in later education, when it matters more. I don’t want something Miyako wants to do someday to be out of her reach because she doesn’t know how to do time-management or study.”

“You guys are overthinking this.” Maki said simply, shrugging, “You keep the kids alive, you make them feel safe, you keep them from being assholes, and all of the rest of it just falls into place. She’ll be fine.”

“Sure, easy enough to say when they’re all on career paths.” Kaito pouted, “No ones telling us what we have to do with Miyako. We could end up preparing her for all sorts of different lifestyles or career tracks, and she could end up like… I dunno. One of those performative street artists. Who wear the black and white makeup in Novoselic. Whats the word…”

“Mimes?” Shuichi asked.

“Boom! That’s the one! We do our best to raise and prepare her, and she grows up wanting to be a mime! How do you account for that!?”

“We are not raising a mime.” Shuichi said grimly, “On my dead body.”

Kokichi had mostly mentioned the daycare as one of the things that was just an option to talk about when it came to Miya’s early education, rather than trying to gun for it, but...well, it could be something to talk about! Now that his family knew what it was.

Though...he doubted Miyako’s ability to self-manage when it came to school would be made or broken by her going to an educational daycare. Mostly? It was for parents who didn’t have the time or ability to share the wonders of the world with their kids themselves. People who worked long hours and didn’t want their kid to play alone at home, or even with a nanny or...even with the same handful of kids at a regular daycare. When you couldn’t take your kid to that cool new museum exhibit, it wasn’t the same, but at least the kid would get that enrichment.

It really did take a village to raise a child, even if a lot of parents did try and take it all on by themselves.

Kokichi thought Kaito had a point in saying that it was totally up in the air what Miya would actually choose to do with her life, but he wrinkled his nose along with Shuuichi at the example he provided. “No way! Of course I wanna be supportive in whatever her interests are, but mimes are like fifth-degree clowns! She can do way better than being a mime.”

“Lots of strong opinions about mimes in this group.” Maki observed, finishing her own meal.

“You have any strong opinions on Miyako’s potential future as a mime, Maki-roll?”

“Mmmm… poor choice of disguise for assassinations. Mimes creep people out, no one would let their guard down around her.”

“Noted. We’ll tell Miya to keep it in mind.” Kaito smirked, before musing, “Clowns are kinda creepy too though. That DICE group was a lot of fun to watch, but they were weird. Especially the little giggly one. He struck me as, like… I dunno how to describe it. Like if we talked I’d probably punch him in the face at some point. The guy screamed ‘punch me’.”

“Those dances were beautiful though. I kind of wish I could see them again but less… strung out. It was hard to appreciate what I was looking at while still going through withdrawal.” Shuichi sighed, “I spent half that show just idly thinking about pollen and the dead forest. It just kept coming to mind.”

“Do you still have any problems with that?” Maki asked, “I know I’ve asked you that before, but since the last time I asked?”

“No. I can’t remember the last time I really wanted any pollen.” Shuichi shrugged, “Thankfully that seems to be well and truly done… there…”

Shuichi’s gaze darkened, as he admitted, “There had been a moment, or, a few moments, both before and after the birth, where I was worried… I know Seiko said the heat wouldn’t come back after I gave birth, but… I think a part of me was still waiting for it to happen. Seiko’s been wrong before… well, obviously.” Shuichi said, giving Miyako a tiredly fond look. “I didn’t know… I couldn’t bring myself to think about what would happen if the heat came back… I suppose I’d be trying to get pregnant again.”

Kaito snorted, “Not with my baby you wouldn’t be. I’m shooting blanks. You’d have been all over Kokichi.”

Shuichi seemed briefly surprised by Kaito’s casual tone, but… he smiled slightly, “True. It would have been an interesting development for Kokichi.”

“IiiiIIIii can’t BELIEVE youuuuuuuu!” Kokichi whined, still mindful enough not to raise his voice in his outrage, as he circled around to butt his head up against Kaito’s back. “Clowns are amazing! And DICE members are the pinnacle! They’re everything I ever wanted to be growing up! What do you know anyway, you’re just a guy that can juggle--that’s the lowest form of clown, even below mimes!”

At least judging from a technical scale. Personally, Kokichi thought that juggling was very cool, and he’d never been much into miming, excluding a few dedicated weeks when he was nine.

Though, despite his husband saying something so outrageous...Kokichi sobered quickly, picking his head up and resting it on Kaito’s shoulder as he looked over at Shuuichi, a softer look in his eyes. Their trip to the coast had been right at the very start of Shuuichi’s recovery…

Looking back, it felt kind of dumb for them to have gone out of town then, even if he knew their reasons. Maybe if they hadn’t…

Kokichi took a breath, feeling that awful guilty, scared feeling in his chest...and breathing it out. It hadn’t been his fault. He wasn’t going to be hurt like that again.

Snorting slightly, Kokichi’s cheeks went pink as he looked over at Shuuichi. “I love Miya, but I’d pull a my father and start getting huffy with every person with even fleeting medical knowledge to try and get a good theory to help you not have a heat before knocking you up again. No matter how cute you got.”

“Man, that stuff wouldn’t have been cute.” Kaito sighed, looking absolutely certain about this. “Our Shuichi in heat again? That would have broken my…” Kaito glanced at Miya, before saying quietly, “damn heart. And if it does start back up again? Kokichi will get huffy, but someone’s gonna have to lock me in a room somewhere, cause I would get mean. I’d get so upset if Shuichi’s heat started back up again after being assured it wouldn’t…”

Kaito just tsked, a genuinely disgusted look on his face. The closest he ever looked to Byakuya, or his mother. He had put a lot of faith into Seiko, and had been disappointed a few times already. With something as important as Shuichi’s mind and self control? His ability to consent? Kaito gave Seiko’s business literally half of his income every month, and has been doing so for almost all of Shuichi’s pregnancy now. He had done it under the faith that all Seiko needed was time and resources to work on Shuichi and Kokichi’s issues, and Kaito knew Seiko wasn’t really refining the spore antidote anymore because it was reliably working now.

If she had been wrong? And could have spent this whole time working on fixing it and just hadn’t? Kaito would have been furious.

Even Shuchi being extra sexy didn’t distract Kaito from how fucking pissed he would have been.

“... he’s very cute right now though.” Kaito grinned, trying to bleed out some of that hypothetical frustration, glancing at Kokichi, who was still resting on his shoulder, and giving him a quick kiss on the cheek as he said, “Look at hiiiiiim… he’s not all pregnant anymore… eating his pasta like a little weirdo… I love him.” Kaito gushed, looking adoringly at Shuichi, who raised an eyebrow.

“What’s wrong with how I eat pasta?” Shuichi huffed, cutting into the last bit.

Kokichi frowned slightly. He hadn’t meant that seeing Shuuichi in the state he’d been on drugs and in heat was cute in any capacity, though...his words did kind of mean that. A poor choice at trying to convey that...that even in his right mind, if Shuuichi had turned on the sexy and asked him to try for another baby, Kokichi would say no. Just like he had promised Shuuichi before, but with a lot more impatient anger directed towards trying to help his boyfriend regain himself.

Kaito, it felt like, was right on the same page.

Letting go of a breath, Kokichi smirked up at Shuuichi and started nibbling on his cookie again, not bothering to get up off of Kaito’s shoulder. “It’s kinda shocking, honey. There’s this whole tradition about long noodles meaning good luck and a long life and all that, right? Generational chefs would cry seeing you demolish a bowl.”

…

He’d put himself back in brighter spirits, but Kokichi hesitated for a moment. (...Kaito had been angry at Seiko...sort of.) They’d talked a little about it before, but… “...hey… You know how I had that check up with Seiko before Miya’s birthday?”

“Hm?” Kaito hummed, tipping his head slightly to press it against Kokichi, just for a moment, before asking, “Um… yeah, it was… shoot, what day even is today… it was like two days before. What about it?”

“She, uh… Well, we just had a regular check-up, you know. Making sure I’m doing okay. And I am! But...she was talking about that new medicine she made? That she gave me when I had my attack…”

Kokichi looked to the side and pressed against Kaito, not exactly nervous but...not knowing how to have this sort of conversation. “She’s been refining it since, doing trials and all that… It’s hard to do clinical trials, really, since there’s not anyone whose come forward that has all the issues I do, but people have volunteered who have other heart conditions, and some folks with various stuff that matches some of what I have… Don’t know the exact data ‘cause of confidentiality clauses and all that.”

“But I’ve already agreed to take it when I start having problems.” That wasn’t the crux of this. “So, she...she might’ve sent you an official thing, but we’ve been busy… She wanted to have a meeting with you about the funding. Outside of monitoring the trials, there’s not a whole lot of progress she can make and...she told me she’s been thinking of starting to work on something that can help people with blood pressure issues specifically, not just something for all the stuff I have going on. But she wants to talk with you first, not wanting to use your patronage for things you haven’t approved, you know?”

“Oh? Uh…” Kaito looked genuinely surprised at that. He hadn’t really thought about what he would do when Seiko was ready to move onto other projects outside of what Kokichi and Shuichi would need. He had sort of just budgeted to do this indefinitely… hmmm…

Kaito glanced at Shuichi. For all of their worst fears, Shuichi really did seem to be fine. The medicine working. And… well, time would tell if this new medicine would help Kokichi during the harder stuff. But blood pressure…

“... I trust Seiko.” Kaito said, because he did, when all was said and done. Again, he had put… a lot of faith in her and her choices and intelligence this last year. Had over-ridden Shuichi’s choice to get a new healer at one point, because Kaito had truly believed Seiko was the best option for him at the time. Had seen what her medicine even before the new developments had done for Kokichi’s health. Kaito had put his faith in her, as his sidekick, and she had-- so far-- followed through… so, “I don’t really think she needs my permission to pick a new thing to research… I mean, hell, if someone else was asking me what healers should focus on next, I’d have gone to ask Seiko what I should say, so…”

“You should stay involved, regardless.” Maki said, giving Kaito a somewhat stern look, knowing when Kaito was trying to dodge leadership responsibilities, “You might not know better than her on what to do with that money, but if you stay up to date with what she’s researching, you can make more informed decisions about how much money you need to donate to her for her to be able to do her research, if she’ll one day need more, or if you need to make some financial decisions and are trying to work out how much you can reasonably give her less before it affects things. Just ignoring a system you’ve involved yourself with isn’t helpful, Kaito.”

Kaito frowned at that… but he nodded. It made sense. It made him nervous, but it made sense. Besides, Seiko was a long term investment. The more time and resources she could dedicate to her research, the better a healer she would be as the years went on. Kaito wanted his partners to have the best physician possible. Investing in Seiko’s future was the way to do that. “I’ll send a message to her pharmacy and ask her when she’s available to talk about it. I’m not sure what I would do if she ever needed more money, I don’t really have any spare to give… fundraising? I guess I could fundraise, or… maybe vouch for her on a government research loan? I don’t know. I’m overthinking it. But you’re right, Maki, I should… at least try to stay involved.”

Kokichi smiled slightly, not...exactly having been nervous on Seiko’s behalf about Kaito disapproving of the sights she wanted to set her research towards. Honestly...Seiko had done the impossible, finding a cure to a parasite they hadn’t known existed, and doing it in the midst of trying not to let a whole slew of sudden patients die. And while the whole experience of being on poppies was traumatic, the treatment plan on its own? Weaning straight from most rehabilitation plans, and a medicine that at worst gave some patients a little too much confidence that they were already fine and back to themselves before the fungus was all the way out. Fatigue and headaches maybe the next rung down.

And that was all not to mention the medicine that Kokichi had been taking for years, making sure he’d see those years, and then as soon as she was able, improving it even more?

She was an excellent healer, if not quite a great person.

...and genius needed to be nurtured.

Nodding a bit to Maki’s point, Kokichi sighed softly. “She’s basically asking for an investment meeting… I know most people who have investors have meetings, like, every quarter to keep people up to date on what’s going on, and letting the patrons know what their money’s doing. Seiko’s been an independent business and researcher for so long, and you’re independently funding her--since you’re not a business in your own right--so I think it’s something out of both your houses.”

“But...yeah. It’s good to know what’s going on.” Kokichi kissed Kaito’s ear. “...and if she ends up needing more money? I can help you guys out. That’s literally my job.”

Kaito grinned at that, putting his arms up and holding Kokichi’s shoulders for a moment, giving him a sorta backwards hug as he said, “Oh yeah… guess it is, huh? Whelp, can’t do anything about it for at least three months, babe. So I guess I’ll come crawling to you for help after that.”

“You two are far too lovey-dovey. Shuichi, how do you put up with this all the time?” Maki asked, going to collect Shuichi’s plate as she went to put her own finished one on the platter.

“There’s sometimes something nice in watching my boyfriends coo at each other,” Shuichi admitted, giving Maki a thankful nod, “But they can be a bit much.”

“That sounds like the whining of someone who is not getting coo’d at enough. We’ll have to fix that, Kokichi.” Kaito said gravely. “Shuichi needs more affection.”

“Uuuuughhhhhh…” Kokichi groaned and pouted, even in the midst of Kaito’s wonderful hug. It was great that he could solely focus on his family and not have to worry about getting up for work or abandoning Nadya in the office! Really! But not being able to do any work was going to drive him up the wall.

Looking up at Shuuichi, Kokichi hummed his assent and stepped back, free of Kaito’s touch before going over to flop half his torso on the bed. “How’re you doin’, Shuu-chan? Do you want a cookie? Or some of that pudding?”

“I want you to go check on my snake.” Shuichi said… before adding in, “And that pudding, too.”

“When Kokichi gets back from snake maintenance, do you want to do the dance thing, Kaito?” Maki asked, watching the red-head go to join Kokichi and Shuichi over on the bed, Kokichi offering dessert in affection but Kaito immediately drawing Shuichi into a hug, placing several kisses against his cheeks.

Kaito ignored her for a moment, Shuichi bearing through several loud, smacking kisses, before sighing, resting his head on Shuichi’s shoulder as he said, “Maki wants to beat me up. Save me.”

“Dancing isn’t sparring.” Maki said, frowning, “That’s literally the point.”

“You still wanna beat me up.”

“I want to listen to a bunch of children pretend to be rockstars.”

“While beating me up.”

“Don’t be dramatic.”

“So mean…” Kaito sighed, snuggling in closer to Shuichi, “Shuichi, go dance in my place.”

“Actually, I need you to replace my bandages for me.” Shuichi remembered, “Probably best to do it while Kokichi’s out.”

Kokichi grinned and nodded, dutifully getting Shuuichi his pudding. They were all having a good time enjoying each other’s company, but Nini was probably feeling a bit left out and lonely at this point. And, being a good boyfriend, it was Kokichi’s job to remedy that. He knew Nini wouldn’t actually understand him, but it was kind of exciting to be able to tell another family member about Miya, too.

Sighing a bit at the mention of Shuuichi’s bandages, Kokichi straightened himself up and headed for the door. “I won’t keep you guys long, then. I wanna make sure Nini’s socialized and cheered up, but I’ll be back before it starts getting dark. So you guys’ll still have daylight in the danceroom.”

With a wave, he headed out, figuring he’d change Nini’s water first before taking the snake out of the terrarium, even if Kaito would be too occupied to freak out about Kokichi taking the snake to the bathroom.

Kaito winced, giving a low whistle. “Man… that looks bad.”

“Great.” Shuichi said dryly, “Thanks Kaito. What you always hope to hear from your boyfriend.”

“As your boyfriend, you look incredibly handsome and I swoon whenever I see you.” Kaito said, getting to work carefully cleaning the wound with some clean towelettes, “As your best friend? This low-key makes me want to vomit. It’s really hard to look at.”

Outside, Maki chuckled lightly, watching Miyako as she said softly to the sleeping baby, “That’s gonna be your whole life. Dad putting his foot in his mouth. With any luck, you’re going to grow up with a good sense of humor.”

“Do you feel alright? Do you need more pain medication?” Kaito asked, feeling his stomach roll a little as he finished cleaning up the long scar. “Man… I haven't seen anything like this since my friend got her boob job done. I hate seeing you guys like this, all cut up…”

“Who was that?” Shuichi asked, “I don’t remember a ‘boob job’ friend. Wait… that one girl in the red dress that you were tripping all over at Fuyuhiko’s party?”

“Nooo. It’s not what you’re thinking, she had them reduced.” Kaito chuckled, rolling his eyes at him as he started wrapping him up in clean bandages, “And she was just one of my classmates in my first year. I’m not sure you ever met her, we didn’t keep in touch after we finished the semester. Her name was Aja. She was nice. A bit on the older side, very pragmatic. She just got tired of the back pain, which was getting worse as she got older. I hope she’s doing alright.”

“Oh, I’m sure she is.” Shuichi said, something… mean. On the tip of his tongue. Something about all of Kaito’s one night stands needing to network with each other, hold some sort of convention… it was a mean joke. Shuichi felt a little bad that it had even come to mind. Shuichi had literally been there for Kaito’s ‘colorful’ past range of ‘relationships’. It was shitty of Shuichi to want to disapprove of it now, when it was all said and done.

He was just a little possessive of Kaito. He wondered how Maki had been able to stand it, basically their entire lives. How had she not wanted to just fight all of those people? Maybe Shuichi would ask her when they were alone. Embrace whatever mindframe had allowed her to let it go.

Kaito sighed as he finished the wrap, placing little kisses against the clean bandages. “Atua heal you quickly.” Kaito said, kissing the bandages again, “Atua loves you.”

Shuichi smiled lightly at that, running his fingers through Kaito’s hair. “I love you too.” He said softly, “Thanks for taking care of me.”

Kaito beamed up at him at that, full of pride.

He didn’t want to keep Kaito and Maki too long, knowing that it was good for them to dance out their issues, but Nini was a member of their family too and would not be neglected. So...at least for a little while, Kokichi was sitting on Shuuichi’s couch, gently stroking along Nini’s body as the snake draped over his shoulders.

“I’m sorry Shuu-chan hasn’t been to visit, but he’ll be by soon enough,” he gently apologized. “It’s really exciting! We had our daughter! Though...I don’t think Kai-chan is gonna be comfortable with you meeting her for a while. Even if it’s irrational fear, it’s still a boundary he’s put down, and Shuu-chan and I should respect that.”

Kokichi smiled slightly at the snake, enjoying the cool, smooth feeling of his scales. “But Shuu-chan’s recovering more and more--he’s able to get out of bed and move around a bit by himself now. So you’ll get to see him soon again.”

He continued chatting softly to the snake, making sure to get good pets in, but...it was probably just his imagination. Personifying Nini too much. But Kokichi could’ve sworn that the snake was lamenting not getting to see their daughter…

For a moment, Kokichi just flopped down onto his mind-bed, savoring the feeling of his...conscious unconsciousness, he supposed. Everything had been too hectic and touch and go to do anything but sleep when he fell asleep, but back home, sleeping in his own bed--even if it was much later than he usually went to sleep, since Kokichi had opted to just lightly doze in a chair to not sleep past Miya’s midnight feeding--it finally felt like they were starting to establish a rhythm.

So it was time to catch up on a few overdue things.

Making sure that his request came across as non-urgent, Kokichi sent his intent out to his friends.

Temp, who had seen the family at the hospital, bringing with him diapers to add to the hoard he knew very well they would need, was slower to respond. Addason was due in two weeks, and with everything ready to go, Temp was taking advantage of his last few free weeks to go back to pretending to be a young twenty-something with no responsibilities. All that to say, he was currently at a pub, chatting up a pretty young lady, when he felt Kokichi ping in his head. And with that, he started trying to politely disengage.

Alter Ego, who had been waiting for this, immediately popped up into Kokichi’s lobby, not bothering to wait for the sign in sheet cause he had a key dammit, leaping past the circus and into Kokichi’s bedroom. Tail twitching as he finally got to say, leaping onto Kokichi’s chest and throwing his face right into Kokichi’s, “CONGRATULATIONS!”

Kokichi burst out into giggles, gently putting his arms around Alter Ego to support the cat, and grinned widely. “Thank you! She’s here!! And I know you were there for a little bit, and thank you so much, but, look, look!”

Excitedly, Kokichi closed his eyes and shared his memory of holding his daughter for the first time, seeing her eyes for the first time, listening to her start to whine, face crumpling, but being calmed… It really was akin to showing off a wallet filled to the brim with baby pictures, the tendency of an excited parent strong in Kokichi.

Gently scratching down Alter Ego’s back, Kokichi took a breath after the memories, smiling gratefully at his friend. “Thank you so much… I’m sorry I haven’t reached out sooner. We just got back from the hospital today.”

“Oh, Kokichi… she’s beautiful.” Alter Ego said appreciatively, this being the first time they had actually seen Miyako, despite having visited her mind twice already. Which, he was going to explain the second time soon, once he was done admiring all the little projections, “Oooooh, look at her little face. She’s so small… it’s astounding, really. You must be so proud.”

“And don’t worry about not reaching out. You’re busy, it’s a trying time. I’ve been keeping an eye on things as best as I can, and it seems like things are… good!” And weird, but before they could get into all of that--

An alarm went through Kokichi’s mind, letting him know someone had just signed into his guestbook. The Templar waiting at the circus tent patiently.

Kokichi grinned wider, a few tears at his eyes already, though they weren’t the start of many. “I am...I’m so proud of her and Shuu-chan...and Kai-chan holding us all together. Maki-chan and my dad were so much help too… It feels like we’ve been waiting forever, and now she’s finally here. Any time I want I can just go look at her, and she’s there…”

Giving a thankful nod to Alter Ego, Kokichi blinked before standing up and opening his door, grinning again as he welcomed Temp in. “Temp, thanks for coming! And thanks for coming by the hospital too. It really meant a lot to see you.”

“Of course. It was exciting to see the young miss.” Temp said, while in the real world the woman he had been flirting with gave him a heated side-eye with her friend group, as Temp went from being open and inviting to sitting at the far corner of the bar, sipping on a whiskey and staring vacantly at nothing, “Plus, it put my mind at ease to see you all in the real world, confirm everything was okay with my own eyes. Considering the circumstances around the birth, I was… worried.”

Alter Ego’s tail twitched, sighing from his spot on the bed. “Kokichi and I haven't discussed that yet… I’m not sure how much he’s aware of.”

“Oh? Right… well, before we get into all of that, how are things since you’ve all gotten home?” Temp asked, putting his hand on Kokichi’s shoulder and giving it a sympathetic squeeze, “In my opinion, the first few weeks are always the hardest. It’s alright if its been challenging.”

The excitement dropped off of Kokichi’s face, not shocked, really, because he definitely knew that he had felt Miya and had, in a panic, begged his friends to check on her, but...for Temp to actually be worried about that, and not just humoring… Worry started to line around Kokichi’s eyes, but he took a breath. They’d get to it.

Appreciating the squeeze, Kokichi led Temp out of the doorway, taking a seat in the chair he’d curled up in for baby duty earlier that night. “It’s only been three days, so there’s not too much to say. We’re really thankful she’s healthy and there weren’t any complications with the surgery, and Shuu-chan is healing up well too. We’ve settled in at home alright, and so far there haven’t been any crises,” Kokichi snorted, half-genuinely in good humor, but knowing that that kind of luck wouldn’t last forever. “We’ve been able to calm her down pretty easily, actually, but so far the scariest thing has been someone knocking a little too loudly on the door, so we’ll see.”

“It’s just been...busy. But in a good way,” Kokichi nodded. Looking between his friends, his expression grew more serious. “...I know I felt her when she was born, and...even with more context, I still don’t really get it. I just...freaked out, and was worried about her, probably because she was freaked out from being born, and I reached out to you guys… But then things were okay.”

Kokichi drew his gaze worriedly between his friends. “...was there more going on?”

Alter Ego and The Templar both exchanged a look. The cats ear twitching, Temp sighing as he crossed his arms, both of them wondering where to start…

“...well, first of all, Hiro wanted me to tell you that his prophecy’s are only right… 30% of the time.” Alter Ego mused, licking his paw, “So, that’s his bad. He says.”

“Forget her strength as an empath, her presence…” Temp sighed, running a hand over his temples, “I confirmed the issue with Thalia. The hivemind doesn’t start affecting flora until six months of age… below a certain size level. That’s how Thalia described it, a mental ‘size’. And Miyako’s sheer size at birth…”

Alter Ego frowned, “We’re being alarming and vague, we should be more clear… Miyako is, apparently, fine. Just so you have that in your mind, Kokichi. But… I keep floundering of what to talk about first. The dragon thing feels important.”

“The dragon thing is… pretty important.” Temp agreed. “But also the least easy to explain, beyond ‘there’s a dragon’.”

“We should have gone over what we were going to say before we talked to Kokichi.”

“I agree. We’re doing a poor job at this.”

...there was no comprehension in Kokichi’s eyes, but damn not for lack of his effort. So...Miya being an Empath was wrong? Or...but...no, he definitely felt her...and come to think of it, he’d felt something clumsy tickling at his consciousness lately, and considering his impression of it, that was definitely Miyako reaching out.

...which shouldn’t be something a weak Empath should be able to do, and not even really something a strong one would be capable of either this young.

And, of course Miya was a Flora, but Kokichi wasn’t a Flora, so he shouldn’t be able to feel anything through that connection, and even then she shouldn’t…

Kokichi was wringing the hem of his shirt in worry, looking between his friends, and while it did help a lot to know that, above all, Miyako was alright…

Kokichi blinked. “...a dragon? Is...what? Maki-chan?”

“Oh yeah. It’s definitely her.” Alter Ego said. “...here, let me show you. Out of concern for her well being, I went and visited your daughters mind quickly. Just to confirm there weren’t any vines that had managed to latch onto her--”

“By ‘vines’ he means other Flora from the hivemind.” Templar explained, “Their mental projections look like vines to the subconscious.”

“-- and there aren’t… like I said, let me show you.”

Alter Ego closed their eyes, projecting out…

{Alter Ego, the second day of their stay in the hospital, lightly drops down into Miyako’s mind.

The mind of an infant is vast, but empty. Strange, flashing lights, odd sounds, everything in Miyako’s mind more ‘impressions’ than ‘observations’. No real thoughts, the mind just a sponge, absorbing everything around her, uncomprehending what she was seeing. Alter Ego jumps in and he knows from her naked, open mind that the most Miyako comprehends three particular smells, associated with particular feelings. Someone who smells like food. Someone who smells like the cool heat against her face. Someone who smells like radiating heat. And a sound, over and over again, with the same tone and sing-song quality. The only constants of her strange, new world.

And in her mind of impressions and smells and heat, only one solid thing.

A massive, red mountain. Jagged, hard edges of massive red rocks, sharp inclines, caves and dips. A mountain that would not have looked out of place in the center desert of Luminary, even though Luminary had no mountains in the center of their deserts.

And Alter Ego stared nervously at the mountain, his whole small body trembling, as he called out, “...M-Miss Harukawa?”

At first, there was nothing… and then the mountain shifted.

And it was only when it was moving did the illusion lose its shape. Did it become obvious that it was not a mountain at all, the rocks shifting muscles and scales, the caves the folds and dips of limbs, the inclines its massive back and tail, curled up.

Alter Ego wanted to run when the mountain lifted its head, staring down at him with intense, red eyes. Waiting…

“U-um… I-I just… my name is Alter Ego, i-if you don’t remember… I-I’m friends with Kokichi? I-I wanted to know i-if you were planning to s-stay to h-hold off the v-vines or… i-if we should be p-preparing for putting d-defenses against the hive in M-miyako’s mind when you’re… gone?”

Those massive eyes blinked. Alter Ego getting the impression they were being sized up, and finding this idea terrifying, because what was a mental projection of a cat made of shards, to the reincarnation of a dragon…

But the dragon rumbled through Miyako’s mind, “I have sworn to stay for as long as I am needed. I keep my oaths, little one. This child is under my protection. The Flora have no claim to her.”

And the mountain settled, eyes closing, the dragon’s presence going still. And Alter Ego, who had once been in the presence of the God of Death and Trade, still left grateful and awed, that something so massive would let him question her…}

...Oh, Maki…

Kokichi tipped his head back with a sigh, but there was a grateful smile on his face. “...thanks for going to check on Miya, Alter Ego. Maki-chan’s gonna take good care of her…”

“...so...she’s a stronger Empath than we thought, the Flora are already aware of her, but can’t connect because of Maki-chan so...that gives us more time for Miya, at least, for her to grow and work with Thalia on her own timeline… Okay. Okay.”

Kokichi let out a disbelieving laugh and rubbed his eyes. “Well, good thing my dad’s already on the case. I guess…” The smile faded from his face. “...if they can’t reach her mentally, but know she’s here…”big” enough, like you said to feel at first… Do you think Flora are gonna come after her physically?”

His question was quiet, tentative, scared in the way someone who had spent their own childhood fending off assassins could truly comprehend. Kokichi hadn’t wanted Miya to have a childhood anything like his own. And this was a big thing he never wanted.

Templar sighed, “...I don’t really know. I’m not sure what they’d hope to accomplish if they did? Miyako’s a Flora, and apparently as far as her presence in the hivemind goes, a powerful type of Flora. Unusually so. But, from how Thalia was talking… I almost feel like it might be wise for you to have a conversation with her yourself, Kokichi. I’m trying to interpret a very quick, admittedly somewhat panicked conversation I had with her. I was concerned not just for Miyako, but what it might mean for Addason.”

“But she said the odds of Addason having the same issue as Miyako are laughably small. It hadn’t even occurred to her that this was possible for Miyako. Flora stature is, apparently, largely reliant on their ‘size’ in the hive mind. Some Flora are apparently massive within the community, able to feel… well, okay.” Temp sighed, “This is the part where I feel unprepared to explain. Apparently, ‘hivemind’ is a more nuanced idea than I had originally assumed. When I thought of ‘hivemind’, I assumed it meant all Flora could see into each other and through each other at all times, no exceptions. Apparently, no. That’s not the case at all.”

“How well a Flora can see through the hivemind depends on their ‘size’, or ‘presence’ within the hive. Some Flora can barely see past the Flora just physically, immediately around them. A few particularly weak Flora are so weakly connected that not only can they not see well into the hive, the hive can barely see them. They’re called ‘Blind Flora’, apparently, and apparently Seedlings are considered a form of ‘Blind Flora’. An average sized Flora can see easily within their community, the flora within their own town, but not much else. They get around this by having stronger Flora in each town, able to see a larger part of the hivemind, constantly projecting to the weaker Flora, to keep everyone connected.”

“The bigger the flora? The more of the hive they can see, and the harder it is too shut them out. An average sized Flora can actually push out Flora their own size if they’re trying to keep a secret from them, if they want too. The bigger you are, the more people you can shut out, the easier it is to keep secrets, and to take secrets from other Flora. And… if you reach a certain size? The really large ‘presence’ can actually start manipulating the hivemind, much like a powerful empath can to other minds. If you’re large enough to effect other hive minds as a physical thing? Then, to Flora… it’s like being nobility in Luminary. The stronger your presence, the higher you are in rank within the society.”

“So, all that to say, I believe from what Thalia was telling me, is that based on Miyako’s presence within the hivemind, she’d be like Thalia’s mother. A dutchess, noble woman… depending on how big she gets as she gets older? She could be considered a type of Flora royalty. So… I just don’t know if Flora would want to ‘come after’ her. But they might consider her a very important person to their society…. Maybe.” Temp shrugged, “I’m honestly not sure. Thalia might have more insight.”

So...she was a super strong Flora and a strong Empath. Kokichi could almost laugh...they really did have a super baby. If that was right, though...she might have an easier time learning how to block herself off from other Flora.

...but he really had no idea how other Flora would feel about that unless he asked one. And...it wasn’t like Miyako was hidden in some countryside cottage--they were public figures, and if the Flora had been able to feel her for even a second, then they knew who she was, and how to find her, even with Maki standing guard.

Kokichi sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose. “...I’ll talk with Thalia...yeah. And...we’re just gonna bet on Addason having a smaller presence, and continue with the original plan for him?” If Thalia thought it was unlikely… She might’ve been wrong with Miya, but even statistically, if Miya turned out to be that rare percent, it was almost doubly unlikely that Addason would be too, even if they were factors that didn’t affect each other. But Miya was a known factor now, so…

Ugh. He hated math.

“At this point, I say we assumed Addason is going to be a normal Flora child, and if he’s not, historically, we should assume a massive dragon is going to land in his head and turn into a mountain.” Alter Ego said, something mildly amused in his voice, “Apparently, that’s not as outlandish as it sounds.

“Ugh. Nothing is ever just simple with you.” Templar said, giving Kokichi an accusing look, “We should have known Miyako was going to be an outlier, considering your dormant empath potential. She’s also already showing potential for serious empath strength. And who knows how having the raw strength of a dragon presence in her mind during her development years is going to do to her…”

“Strong empath parents historically don't equal strong empath children.” Alter Ego sighed, “So really, it’s purely luck that Miyako has a parent strong enough to teach her the things she’ll need to know. It’s actually really fortunate for her.”

Kokichi gave Temp a slightly apologetic look, a few reverberations in the corners of the room echoing Dr. Mariah having similar sentiments. Apparently, Kokichi was just destined to never have anything normal in his life, and that extended to his daughter too. Even with being a high-ranking Flora, a powerful Empath, and having a dragon playing guard dog in her head...Kokichi really did hope she’d find some calm normalcy in her life. It was what he was going to work for for her, at least.

“I’m going to do my best to teach her,” Kokichi quietly said, looking over at the new addition in his mindroom; Miya’s crib, though empty, like how Kokichi’s partners only showed up when he pulled up their memories.

Except for Chibi Kaito, of course.

“...I really freaked out about being able to feel her at the hospital,” he quietly admitted. “My dad calmed me down alright, and my partners think it was just the stress of the night… But I think I’m feeling her just normally, too. Hell, I think I even felt Shuu-chan’s snake today.”

“...I think I’m getting closer to remembering.”

“It’s been almost a year since I started to train you. Your abilities are becoming easier to manage, more refined, more controlled… I’ve always wondered if maybe your mental block was your mind protecting itself until you were ready.” Alter Ego admitted, since, honestly, there weren’t a lot of other reasons for why Kokichi couldn’t remember. “If you’re starting to remember? It might just be because you’re becoming more comfortable with being an empath.”

“That’s a point… my oath is starting to nag at me.” Temp admitted, sighing a little, “To Shuichi, I mean. How has he been? I swore I’d tell him once it was safe for him to hear about all of this, but, as his partner, I think it’d be wise to wait on your go-ahead for when it's ‘safe’ or not.”

Well...it’d been a little over half a year, but Kokichi had felt like he’d come a long way since climbing up a dream building to follow a cat. And at the beginning there...he’d really struggled with his identity. It still popped up, like with Kokichi’s panic over thinking he was the one who had changed Kazou, but...he had struggled for so long thinking about his power over others and what his morals meant and if he was justified in any course of action.

And these days? He felt...more assured in himself, not second-guessing his plans. And in trying to help people get rid of their conditioning, Kokichi felt purposeful.

So...maybe even in his subconscious, he agreed it was time to be his fullest self all the time. It would certainly make things with Miya easier.

Turning to Temp, Kokichi nodded slightly. “He’s been recovering well, but...I mean, we’ve only just left the hospital. I think...when he’s feeling alright enough to move comfortably on his own? That might be a good time.” Kokichi’s expression softened. “...he feels a little weird about things, but...I haven’t noticed him getting in his head, getting bummed out. So...I think he’ll be okay.”

Temp nodded, “I’ll wait a bit longer, and ask again before I do it. Miyako’s already showing a lot of signs of power, but we don’t know if she’ll actually be able to utilize any of it any time soon, so Shuichi might not need to know about that yet, and your memory bursts… havn’t? Been alarming yet?” The Templar asked, looking to Kokichi to confirm, “So if it's not urgent, I think my oath will allow me to delay it long enough to make certain Shuichi is well adjusted.”

Kokichi grimaced a bit at Temp asking if his bursts had been alarming. “I mean…”

“...Part of me thinks I’m going crazy...but I’m not...overly alarmed by it, most of the time. I think I remember just enough to not completely freak out,” Kokichi sighed. “...But I have freaked out to Kai-chan once, and my dad at the hospital, but...he knows what’s going on so… He’s been telling me that things are alright, and that they’ll make sense and I just gotta hold out… It’s helping, but--”

Kokichi drew in a sharp breath, his eyes popping open as an ear-piercing wail shook through his head, his body moving to get up before he even registered what was happening.

Miya.

“Shhh, shhh, no no no,” Kaito whispered, having been worried this was coming and immediately feeling immensely guilty as he winced, glancing over his shoulder as both of his partners started shifting in bed.

Miyako had been pissed the moment he had woken her up for her feeding at three in the morning. The baby was always a little annoyed when they woke her, usually fussing or wiggling or looking a bit offended, but this time had immediately looked different, when Kaito had stirred her up. While she had eaten a little, she kept turning her head, trying to refuse the bottle, her body wiggling harder and more aggressively as Kaito kept putting the nipple back to her mouth, telling her, ‘Miya, you have to eat, you can’t skip food, the healers and books all say it's really important… come on, baby. M~iiiiiyaaaaa…’

And Kaito had no idea what had finally triggered it, but he had seen it in her face, the second before she had decided, ‘Yep. It’s time to complain to management’.

Management being ‘The Whole World’ as she screamed.

“Shush, shush, no no no…” Kaito whispered, seeing Shuichi sigh and sit up, “No, it’s okay, I’ve got her, you can go back to sleep!”

“I really can’t though.” Shuichi grumbled, blinking sleepily at Kaito and Miya, before asking, “...what’s wrong?”

“Uuuuuhhhhh.” Kaito said, no idea how to answer that.

Kokichi shuffled out of bed, blearily looking at his wailing daughter with pity. “...food, diaper, burp?”

While the unfortunate reality was that sometimes Miyako would just be upset over something they had no control over, there were only a few factors in her life that they could check on. And if she was already in Kaito’s arms, then…

Still not quite awake, Kokichi groaned softly, instinctually reaching out to his daughter. {Miya-Miya, what’s wrong, baby?}

Miyako couldn’t really think in a way that was meaningful to anyone, but… well. That wasn’t what ‘intent’ was anyway. So as Kaito murmured to himself, “Diaper, I’ll try the diaper.” Still looking incredibly guilty that Miyako had had her first real fit on his watch as he placed her down, checking through her diaper…

After a moment. Wild and unfocused, the feeling came back, {TIRED!}.

Miyako wailed, still too young to form real tears, her face beat red as she clenched her tiny fists in rage while Shuichi yawned, shifting in bed like he was planning to get up, but wincing as he felt pain flare up from his midsection, stopping his attempts to get out of bed. He hadn’t been planning to take another pain killer until the morning, but, well, he hadn’t been planning to be awake until the morning either. “Is it the diaper?”

“Yeah, she’s wet.” Kaito realized, chewing on the inside of his lip as he started to change her, “Sorry guys, sorry, give me a second… M~iiiyaaaa, does someone have a wet tushy? It’s okay, it’s okay, dad’s got you…”

But as Kaito changed and wiped her down, putting her in a new diaper, Miyako just looked more and more irritated. Kicking her small legs in aimless fury. {TIRED!}

Most of Kokichi nodded sleepily, humming his assent to Kaito changing her, figuring that was it...but he knew it wasn’t all of it. However, Shuuichi’s movements caught his attention, and Kokichi turned away, trusting Kaito to handle Miya. Going to his boyfriend’s side, Kokichi gave him a worried look. “You need a painkiller?”

{Oh, baby, I’m sorry, we can all go back to sleep in a moment, okay? Dad’s making sure you get to be comfy while you sleep, and making sure your tummy isn’t gonna hurt. Please hold out a little longer, then you can rest.}

It wasn’t with a conscious thought at all. Kokichi feeling the angry pain of someone he loved dearly, and empathetically--and Empathetically--reaching out, trying to soothe and explain.

Shuichi winced, putting his arm around his stomach, “...yes, please.” He said softly to Kokichi, “It’s easy to forget how bad it is when I’m on the painkillers. Though, Kaito was sure to let me know earlier how gross he thought it looked.” Shuichi said, giving Kaito a dry look.

“Ooooh, Miiiiiyaaaa… dada’s stomach is super busted because of you.” Kaito coo’d, picking her up again and sighing as she wailed, deciding to try to burb her before trying to give her the rest of her bottle, “Is that why you’re so sad? Do you feel bad you beat dada up so bad? It’s not your fault M~iiiiiiyaaaaa.”

Miyako wailed, saying out petulantly, {But I wanna be asleep noooooow! And my face huuuuuurts!}

Though this intent was interrupted as she gave the world a confused look as Kaito put her on his shoulder and started tapping on her back. A little baffled by all of this, her wailing quieting for a second as her world went ‘Thump-thump-thump’.

“Blegh.” She vomited. Less soothed and more momentarily bewildered into silence, as Kaito sighed, assuming that was what had his daughter wailing.

“There, there… that’s no fun, huh… let’s clean you and, uh… me up.” Kaito sighed, putting Miyako down, who was still weighing the options in her mind if she was going to go back into wailing now that this whole ‘vomiting’ thing had interrupted her train of thought.

Kokichi sighed in exasperation before heading off to the bathroom, quickly filling a glass and getting Shuuichi’s painkillers for him. “Seriously…? Like...no one’s looking like a model out of surgery, but c’mon… I’m just glad you’re holding up okay on painkillers...even if waking up in the middle of the night is disruptin’ things…”

It was more or less nonsensical rambling as Kokichi handed the items over, leaning his hip against the bed to watch Kaito and Miya.

{I know, it’s really unfair, but you’ll feel better later for it. You don’t wanna feel bad later, do you?}

{Aw, there’s a girl… Just a few more moments, then Dad’s gonna tuck you in all warm and comfy and we can all go back to sleep. I love you, Miyako.}

‘Later’ was a very strange concept to Miyako, who was pretty convinced there was and always had been only now, and now sucked… but as she gave confused, baffled little gurgles, Kaito finished cleaning her up, picking her up and whispering, “Just eat a little more Miya, please? You feel all empty now, right?” He asked, picking her up and placing her against his chest, bringing her the bottle again.

Miyako still wanted to currently be asleep and was still pretty frustrated that she wasn’t immediately getting what she wanted, which seemed entirely reasonable to her… but between being confused by her vomiting, and Kokichi’s warm reassurances, along with this weird concept of ‘later’, which sounded mostly like a fake thing, but okay…

...Miyako stilled long enough that her face hurt less, no longer wailing at the top of her lungs, and as she begrudgingly took the nipple, she blinked sleepily, listening to Kaito’s heart beat and starting to fall asleep against his heat as she mindlessly ate… {Tired…} she whined again…

Kaito sighed as Miyako fell asleep in his arms, the bottle still in her mouth. Well… that was alright. She had eaten most of it, at least. “She’s asleep,” Kaito softly called back to the others, as he put her down and started to wrap her up. “Sorry, guys…”

“Don’t be sorry,” Shuichi yawned, finishing the painkiller Kokichi had given him, “We all knew the crying was coming. At least it didn’t last very long.”

With her crying cut off, they weren’t totally in the clear, but Kokichi climbed back into bed next to Shuuichi anyway, trusting Kaito to finish up. And it was trust well-placed. They wouldn’t always be able to soothe back Miya’s crying when one of them was on-duty, and...for a while, they would all probably wake up to her cries, but they would be able to handle it. With a change of a diaper and a pat on the back.

“S fine…” Kokichi echoed Shuuichi’s yawn, already feeling pulled back to sleep. “She’s jus’ real tired...can’ help it when she needs to wake up for food… An’ babies don’t understand the concept of ‘later’ anyway…”

“...g’job, Kai-chan… Good...dad-in’...”

Kaito chuckled lightly at that, placing Miyako back into the crib, before running a hand through his hair. “Yeah, thanks guys. Still, feel free to go right back to… oh.”

Kaito looked over at them and saw Shuichi and Kokichi were both already conked out. Kokichi all curled into Shuichi’s side, whose hair was sprawled out, one leg hanging out the blanket, Kokichi barley covered at all.

Getting up, he went to more evenly adjust the blanket around them, straightening Shuichi out a little and literally picking up Kokichi’s hips and putting them in a new place, otherwise Kokchi was going to end up entirely vertical across the width of the bed. “There we go…” Kaito murmured, looking around the room, “Everyone’s comfy and safe and sleeping… it’s all okay…”

‘...’

‘...check on--’

Kaito sighed. Yeah, yeah, alright… he wouldn’t take long. Ten minutes to check on Timothy and Maki and peek into the nursery. Then he’d sit by Miyako’s crib. Go check on everyone, make sure they were safe. No fires or intruders or a thousand other little dangers that made Kaito’s stomach twist in fear to imagine…

Kaito went to go check on Timothy first. Listening at his door. No sounds of distress, no movement… ‘What if he’s not in there? What if he’s been kidnapped? What if--’

Kaito sighed, starting to take out the key. He’d hear the kid breathing, he wouldn’t walk in, it’d be fine…

Things had settled into routine, and while the arrival of Miyako Saihara was something new, it wouldn’t change her own routine that drastically. It just meant that loud noises in the middle of the night would become more frequent in the west wing of the third floor, and that the noises didn’t mean danger.

But you never get lulled into an assumptive habit. That’s where accidents happened.

Katsuki didn’t really mean to sneak up on Kaito, but that was the nature of being quiet. Violet eyes staring down from the end of the hall, Katsuki spoke softly. “It’s more efficient to not try and compromise with yourself. Do what you need to do.”

“Oh, fuck.” Kaito’s whole body jolted, and to his own (somewhat baffled) displeasure, he brought his shoulders and arms up, protecting his head and accidentally jamming his shoulder into the door. “Fuck… fuck…”

The fear left him immediately, but it was followed by immediate alarm and embarrassed, as he looked in surprise at Katsuki for a moment, before realizing… “Oh! Timothy, it’s me, it’s dad! Sorry, I ran into your door!”

There was a brief moment of silence… before the door opened, Timothy in his PJ’s peeking out, looking nervous for a moment, before his nerves went away seeing his dad and Katsuki outside. He glanced up at Katsuki, before bowing his head. “Hello, Miss Okuniji.” Before looking to his dad, “Dad?”

“Sorry, sorry buddy, I was walking down the hall and ran into your door. You can go back to sleep, I just didn’t want you to not know what was happening.”

Timothy looked briefly like he had more questions… but his curiosity visibly bled out of him, yawning sleepily as he said, “Kay… good night…”

“Nght, kid!” Kaito grinned, waving as Timothy closed the door, before running that same hand over his face, “...ngh… I’m gonna put a bell on you, Katsuki, I swear.”

Waving to Timothy when he poked his head out, Katsuki grinned in her usual earnest way as Kaito came down from his surprise. “My apologies--I was already here, and any form of making noise to alert you that I was here would’ve resulted in the same outcome. Even hearing my footsteps from afar would’ve put you on edge.”

Because that’s what he was looking for with a worst-case scenario running through his head.

Looking to the side of the hall, Katsuki paused for a moment. “Do you have any other stops on your route? Since it is your first night back, I’m not acquainted with the changes, if you are going to check on more than Miss Maki, the nursery, and Timothy.”

Kaito gave her a wary look, rubbing the back of his neck… before sighing. “You know about that, huh? I’m guessing you’ve seen me do it? Heh… I wanna say I’ve never seen you out here, but I know first hand you’re not seen unless you wanna be seen…”

Kaito took another steadying breath, massaging the back of his neck for a bit… “Sorry. Sorry, it’s nice to see you Katsuki. It feels like it’s been ages since I’ve talked to you. I didn’t mean to be snippy. Are you doing your rounds?”

Katsuki nodded in the affirmative. There wasn’t much she could do to truly erase her physical body from existing in the world, but there were many, many ways to escape notice, and Katsuki regularly employed those methods in her work. And outside of work.

“You keep a tighter schedule than some of those in the guardforce, Kaito,” Katsuki chirpily replied. “But it’s good to speak with you as well--I am glad you all have made it home without complication, especially Shuuichi and Miyako.”

Nodding once, Katsuki explained, “I am on the night rounds tonight, though being scheduled is not the determining factor to why I am here. If you feel secure enough to check on others, then I will conclude that Miyako has been taken care of from her outcry.”

Kaito sighed, nodding his head, “Yeah, yeah, she’s fine… you heard that? Wow, she was louder than I thought… have you seen her yet? Not too many people have yet, we’re just trying to get everything settled before we start showing her off. Um…” Kaito frowned, blinking tiredly at Katsuki, “...geez, I’m really struggling to remember. It really has been a minute since I’ve seen you, Katsuki. I’m sorry I haven't reached out, I know you and Maki had some sort of fight… I should have tried to mediate. Maki-roll just sometimes needs a friend telling her to calm down, ya know? I hope you haven't felt like you needed to avoid us.”

“It is my goal to be the ears of the castle, Kaito,” the guard said simply. “Where there is a cry or an oddly forceful step, I will be there to ensure the safety of all who call this place home. That is my mission.”

“No, I have not seen your daughter yet, however. The world is very strange, and I have the patience to withhold my personal complexity until you and she are more ready for it.” Kids needed time to adjust to strangers, especially an infant who likely only barely recognized her parents. Katsuki rarely made any sort of personal ease even with adults, so she didn’t mind waiting to see the new addition to Kokichi’s family, even if she’d already heard her.

But...that was the only reason Katsuki had been holding back. Katsuki blinked, though her expression didn’t hold much shock or surprise. “I was not aware I was in any kind of altercation with Maki. We have all just been walking along our own paths, as far as I was concerned. Is she upset with me?”

Kaito frowned at that, and briefly felt bad for both Maki and Katsuki. Katsuki because it sucked to not be aware of what was happening with your relationships, which Kaito understood painfully well these days, and Maki because… well, it was awful to feel anger and resentment to someone who was barely aware you existed. Which he didn’t think was Katsuki’s intentions, but, man, it was an effective way to belittle someone… to be so uncensored with their feelings on things that you weren’t even aware of their resentment.

Still… “You might not be anymore. Maki talked about it months ago, before she left for Luminary, so maybe you’re both just over it and I haven't been caught up on it since then?” Kaito offered, that being a genuine possibility. “She was all pissed off you wouldn’t tell her how you knew where Kokichi was in the woods?”

“She did greet me in a manner I would consider characteristic when I welcomed her back,” Katsuki mused softly, but then she blinked, smile fading just a bit. “Ah. I did explain to her what I did, but I got the impression that Maki did not believe me. I told her it was the truth, and from that point, there is little use to arguing further. If she has decided to disregard my own statements, there are no longer any actionable paths I can take.”

The guard tilted her head to the side slightly. “She did seem put out, but I had believed it to be a negligible moment in the grander scheme, and that she simply needed a bit of time to herself.”

“Ah…” Kaito scratched his cheek, before asking uncertainly, “...do you not want to be Maki’s friend? It’s okay if that’s it. Maki can be a tough person to get along with. I mean, I think she’s worth it, but I think we both know I am incredibly biased by this point.” He grinned, before looking down the hall, “Um, do you mind if we walk and talk? I still gotta ‘finish my round’ as it were.”

Katsuki nodded, taking an opening step to allow Kaito forward and to continue his round, but the confused look on her face only grew more apparent. “...I fail to understand how my actions are counteractive to friendship. Would you mind explaining more to me?”

Though, Katsuki was aware that the feelings and bonds of friendship were things she did not have a firm grasp on in the first place. She considered herself comrades with the others in the guardforce, and she considered Kokichi her friend, but there were no definitions for that sort of thing. It just...was. And considering how she and Maki had sought each other out voluntarily before, she considered them, if not friends, than comrades in the same way as her coworkers.

Was that not the right perception?

“Well… I guess I should say that maybe you don’t want to be friends with Maki in the same way I’m friends with people. Which is fair, cause it turns out how I keep people close to me is kinda…” Kaito waved his hand vaguely, shrugging, “Clingy, desperate, toxic… I dunno, take your pick. But, I do know that telling someone the truth is kinda the bare minimum in engaging with them. Telling someone a fact and then not bothering to address their concerns is kinda the sort of thing you do to someone you wanna be a dick too… though, maybe that’s a culture difference thing? That might be a culture difference thing. I’m really bad at connecting with people in this culture.”

Kaito shrugged at that, before they got near Maki’s door, putting a finger to his mouth to indicate silence, before pressing his ear to Maki’s door. No sounds of distress… Kaito backed up from it and rubbed the back of his neck, “Maki’s always hardest to check on. I know I’ll wake her up if I open her door, so I don’t usually do it, but she’s the one that always worries me most. My Maki-roll lived such a dangerous life… I’m always worried it’s going to come looking for her again…”

He stared warily at her door… before saying, “Do you wanna see Miya’s nursery? We worked really hard on it. Kokichi painted murals on the walls, it’s kinda amazing.”

Katsuki was quiet for a moment. “...I still do not fully understand. She asked me how I was able to locate Kokichi, and I explained. Then she said that if I had not wanted to tell her, I should have just said so, but I explained that that was not the case, and that I had told the truth. Then she left. If after two explanations she still believes I am lying, I do not understand how explaining for a third time would change anything.”

“I have no reason to lie to Maki, and I find her--and your--drive to protect you loved ones to be a familiar motivation. I have nothing more to offer of myself than what I have already shown to provide as reason for belief. Badgering someone into compliance is a method, but it is one that invokes resentment, which I do not want to provoke in any of you.”

Katsuki stayed quiet as Kaito listened in on Maki’s door, before looking to the room next door, between Maki’s room and the princes’. “I would be honored to see the work you have all put into it. I am not in the habit of peeking into windows if there is not altercation within.”

“...additionally. It does become more peaceful. If you let it. But it takes time.”

Kaito nodded quietly, listening to Katsuki explain her reasoning, and of course it made sense… but only if you didn’t really understand how other people thought. Which, just by the nature of ‘people’, tended to not be the rational path as, like… literally the rule… it was hard to explain social niceties to the pragmatic.

“Hmm… I’m not saying you should lie to Maki. Maki would literally cut me open if I suggested anyone lie to her, I’m not crazy.” Kaito chuckled grimly, going to open the door of the nursery, “And, again, you don’t have to take my advice, cause it’s really only good advise if Maki’s someone you want to get close to someday, not if you just want to go back to being acquaintances. But… if the truth wasn’t making sense to Maki? To the point where she was getting pissed that you were even saying it? Then, if you wanted to try to ease the situation…”

Kaito thought about what he would have done… “If Maki couldn’t accept the truth, she might have responded better to a reason why you couldn’t give her an answer she could accept. And, heh, I feel like your instinct is going to be to say that the reason is because you didn’t tell her a lie and you didn’t want to lie to her, but… you don’t have to lie to someone to explain that you… I dunno. That you don’t have an answer that would make sense to them, I guess… or, hell, maybe you did say something like that. Maki can be tough when she’s pissed. It’s why I felt like I should have mediated when I first heard something happened.” Kaito admitted, rubbing the back of his neck, “Some people just take more effort and patience, ya know? My Maki’s like that.”

“Tada!” Kaito grinned, turning on the light and letting Katsuki in, looking around in open admiration at all of their hard work. It really was a beautiful nursery, Kokichi’s paintings o the meadow soft and friendly, toys littered around, a little work station and toddler toilet set up in the corners when the guys had started thinking further ahead and couldn’t resist getting them.”I can’t wait to bring Miyako in here… this is her room. I hope she’ll love it someday…”

Kaito gave Katsuki a curious look. “...What takes time, Katsuki?”

Katsuki couldn’t say she fully understood Kaito’s advice, but...to regain the more cordial terms the two had been on, then Katsuki should show more persistence? That seemed like a logical course of action--friendships were born from time and trust, trust born from time and multitudes of actions lacking hostility or negligence. Perhaps it would make sense to adjust her schedule to coincide with Maki’s more, so the two could greet each other. Or perhaps she could ask for another sparring session--it had been a long time since their last, and Maki was no longer sick from her return to the castle.

It would be nice to trade techniques again.

As Kaito showed off the nursery, Katsuki’s eager smile returned, her eyes lighting up in interest as she peered around. It was very pleasant...perfectly suited to an infant, and even prepared for toddler years. It had been very heartening, seeing the royal family so gung-ho about providing for their daughter. There were even toys and blankets set up, like the girl was already living there.

“...this is a place of love, it is clear,” Katsuki nodded with approval. “Miyako would have no reason to find fault with it.” To the point it would bring her joy, Katsuki was sure.

Turning back to Kaito, Katsuki explained herself. “Danger no longer looking for you. The habits born from it may remain, but one day it will no longer feel like negligence or a turning point in disaster to not carry them out. Peace comes for those who let it. The belief in it takes longer.”

“Yeah?” Kaito asked, scratching his chin again, looking around the nursery, Miyako still on the back of his mind. He still hadn’t been out long, even with this conversation, but he… man, please don’t let anyone have woken up to see he stepped out… he didn’t want any of them to think he was being careless with them…

“...I just don’t wanna miss things again, ya know? I feel like I could have spared them all so much if I had just been… paying attention…” Kaito said softly, glancing at the window, looking at it for a second before going to check to make sure it was still latched shut.

Of course it was. Like it had been the last time he had checked on it.

He still warily pushed at the window, not trusting his own eyes. It didn’t budge. Okay… okay…

Looking back at Katsuki with a tired grin, he said, “But, yeah… that makes sense. Time heals all wounds, right? It’ll be nice to not feel like I gotta double check every night. All peaceful and stuff… thanks Katsuki.”

“I gotta be getting back, but you should come see Miyako soon. I know every parent thinks their kids fascinating to look at, but man, she’s got the prettiest little features... “ Kaito frowned, before saying to Katsuki on their way out, “Everything been okay with you?”

“You acted according to your abilities and sensibilities, as did everyone else. And from where those came up short, we have all learned. It does not do to wish to see them put to action, but every memory we have becomes our muscle. We have gotten stronger from the moments we have not matched up to our hearts, and while the situations in the future will be different, we will have become more prepared.” Katsuki gave the prince a nod before adding, “You are welcome.”

While she would doubtlessly come by to see Miyako once the parents had opened things up for visitors, Katsuki gave Kaito another nod before grinning. “Affirmative! All missions and objectives have been running smoothly and within my capabilities. The safety of Diceans is my priority, and while I continue to contribute my efforts meaningfully towards that cause, I will be fulfilled.”

“I do think we shall cross paths more during these nights, however. I will not ignore even an infant’s cry, regardless of how habitual it becomes. Goodnight, Kaito.”

“Goodnight, Katsuki.” Kaito said, giving her a wave, before heading into the room. Everything still quiet and peaceful…

Gotta let peace in, huh? That made sense… though every nerve in Kaito’s body fought the idea. He suddenly understood Maki’s paranoia their whole lives. It was harder to relax when, in the back of your mind, ‘relaxing’ meant ‘not ensuring the people you loved were alive and safe’. Which felt… awful. Too hard to keep up with. Even if nothing happened, it felt like you were letting them down…

Kaito was haunted by every major disaster in their lives he had failed to see coming, or even actively ignored. Haunted by the idea that if he had just been paying attention…

It was a terrible way to feel. He understood why Maki had chosen to be actively, aggressively paranoid, rather than live with that feeling of ‘could I have done better’. At least one didn’t feel like a betrayal…

Kaito went to sit by the crib, glancing at his partners on the bed, and the moon coming in at the window. It felt safer to keep Miyako by the bed during the day, but he might make an argument for moving her crib at night to the window, just so whoever was on watch could enjoy the view a little. He wondered what Kokichi had done to entertain himself while Kaito and Shuichi were asleep. Maybe Kokichi had snoozed between rounds, letting the alarm wake him up.

Kaito wasn’t really tired…

Time went by. Kaito tried to read a book, but it was kinda dark, and his heart wasn’t really in it. He spent some time looking at Miyako, glancing at the clock, looking at her.

The alarm wasn’t loud. It wasn’t meant to wake up a room full of people, just alert someone who was already awake what time it was. Kaito quickly turned it off, going off to prepare Miyako’s bottle.

He glanced slightly nervously at the guys, but… they were both such deep sleepers. He doubted he’d wake them. And, well, this was his chance to see if this sorta thing would soothe Miyako… ngh. Hopefully she wouldn’t start crying.

Kaito, bottle in hand, picked up Miyako and headed to the window. She hadn’t quite woken up with being picked up, and honestly, Kaito wished he could just let her sleep. She looked so peaceful…

He shrugged himself out of his shirt, and whispered, “M~iiiiyaaaa,” softly as he started to unwrap her on the window seat, resisting the urge to frown as she immediately started making little whining sounds, frustrated to be woken up agan, “I know, I know, I’m sorry… are you hungry Miyako? M~iiiiiyaaa… shhhhh, it’s okay…”

He picked her up and cradled her in one arm, putting her against his chest, head to his heart, like all the baby books said. He brought the bottle to her and felt nervous as, once again, she started to try to turn away from it. Which was how the whole mess had started last time…

Kaito didn’t like to really try to sing in front of other people. It made him self conscious and nervous, he’d rather be big and loud and a little goofy when he tried to sing in front of others. ‘Like, ha ha, see, we’re all in on the joke, it’s okay to point out I’m bad.’ He wasn’t a good singer, or anything more than passable, but enjoying the theater so much growing up had made that a shame rather than just an average, run of the mill fact. So he didn’t like to be reminded of it, if he could help it.

Kokichi’s earlier cries that all he had wanted to be growing up was a clown brought a smile to Kaito’s face. Kokichi had grown up wanting to be big and loud and goofy and make people laugh, and Kaito had grown up wishing he was more elegant and sauve and, well, gentle, like Kokichi. He guessed you always kinda wanted what you didn’t have. Kokichi had a very pretty singing voice. Kaito honestly couldn’t wait to start hearing his husband start singing to Miyako, when the thought would finally come to him.

But Kaito, quietly, just murmured his first attempt to Miyako, trying to soothe her into accepting the bottle, “I dreamt I was the ocean, cause the oceans what I was… oh I pulled him out to sea, just to have a little fun… and we danced along the shores, and we swept along the banks… and I held him ever tighter, till he couldn’t swim away… and who’d have known? But I should have let go… oh, who could have known… but I should have let go…”

It was a grim song, in its entirety, but Kaito hadn’t known that as a child, and Miyako wouldn’t know it now. And it made him think of his mothers singing voice. And he wondered if she had done this for him too. Held him close when he was on the verge of tears and sang him little melodies…

Maybe not. Maybe she had left it to the nannies.

Kaito almost barely noticed it was working, so worn down by that thought. But Miyako watched him in fascination, mindlessly sucking on the bottle, as Kaito murmured to her, “And I dreamt I was the sky that rejected him… and I dreamt I was the earth, too far away… and I dreamt I was the sea that embraced him… begged him to stay… pulled from the bay… oh who could have known… I should have let go.”

Chibi Kaito couldn’t talk, but Kokichi could hear. And while Chibi Kaito wasn’t aware of this part of Kaito, since Kokichi wasn’t, as Kokichi listened to the distant murmurings of Kaito to Miyako…

“♩♩♪♩...♩♩♪♩…” Chibi Kaito gave in soft, bell sounds, to the memory of Miyako. Petting her hair, the figment just admiring her, “...♩♩♪♩...♩♩♪♩…”

They settled into routine, even if every day was new. And while Kokichi had always hated waking up at 6, he did so dutifully, taking over Kaito’s place by Miya’s crib and slowly cooing to wake her up for first breakfast. He had found that sitting in the window seat in the soft light of the morning sun helped ease her crankiness that early in the morning.

So...that’s where he was, carefully holding Miya to his bare chest, humming idly as he took in the sunlight too, letting it make up for being shirtless first thing in the morning. Normally Kaito just went back to sleep, snagging a few extra hours before having breakfast with Tim (and the girls if they came a little early and didn’t have breakfast at home) and snagging some for Kokichi (and less frequently Shuuichi who was getting better bit by bit), but today he noticed his husband just looking at him from the bed.

Not wanting to wake Shuuichi up--though it was pretty easy to avoid that--Kokichi just raised an eyebrow, tilting his head and prompting his husband to talk.

“...” Kaito never really got tired of watching Kokichi in the morning with their daughter, but his endless enthusiasm for his ethereal husband wasn’t what had gotten Kaito really up and ready to talk that morning, as he said, “I had a weird dream last night.”

And he hadn’t realized he had a weird dream until the words were out of his mouth, because he had woken up thinking he was just remembering something, but… it was too weird to be a real memory. Like, parts of it probably were an actual memory, enough to fool Kaito for a moment, but… “It was the night Tim stabbed me. Got my cool, ‘wing scars’,” Kaito said sarcastically, two pronounced scars at hs shoulder blades Kaito having decided after a long time looking at them looked a little like maybe he had wings ripped out… though that was maybe just a generous way of looking at two kinda alarming looking scars on his back. “But I only kinda knew it was that night cause of dream logic, ya know? In the dream, a giant was trying to open up my back. He was really, like, cheery about it, but I thought he was trying to break me open to eat me…”

Kaito frowned at that, before saying, “...there was a giant that night. Wasn’t there? I never saw the guy again, but some wall of a dude came in and I… don’t really remember what happened after that… I think I passed out…”

Kokichi rocked Miya slightly as Kaito spoke about his dream, for a moment thinking of the day when Miya would look over their scars and ask where they came from. Some were easier answers, funny little stories of childhood carelessness. The night at the greenhouse would be...more difficult, even if everyone involved was alright with it now.

Humming lowly, Kokichi shook his head a little. “Creepy dream… I really don’t know if it’s scarier when, like...the monster or horror villain is all stoic and growly, or if they’re overly chipper and almost friendly about it. It’s just unsettling either way.

He looked down, smiling as Miya blinked slowly, almost like a cat just about to take a nap. She didn’t seem to need a change, so he’d let her get back to sleep after a quick burp. An easy morning.

Snorting softly, Kokichi moved about, getting a cloth ready and gently patting Miya once she was set. “Yeah, I never saw him before I fainted, but they said Fuyuji found us and carried us all to the med bay. He’s like...6’7” or something? I’d say that’s worthy of being a giant.”

Kaito’s eyes widened at that, “6’7?? How do you even… what are you all feeding Diceans? Everyone here is a damn giant… there’s gotta be something in your water supply or food or something. I was tall back at home… I’m literally, like, average here.”

As Kaito mused over the idea of anyone being that big, he frowned curiously again, “Fuyuji… for such a big person, I really don’t think I’ve seen him since that night. Which is kinda bad, now that I think about it. I wasn’t quite in the right head space to be thanking the staff for anything back then, but I probably should have thanked him for at least saving my life, if not both of ours. All three of us, really. If Timothy had successfully killed me and accidently given you a heart attack, no one could have saved him from Tengan. The guy saved all our lives.”

Kokichi chuckled softly, comfortable enough now that he paid no heed to the bit of vomit on the cloth on his shoulder as he started tucking Miya back up in her blanket. “Seriously though? That’s insanely tall. Enough for, like, everyone to comment on. And while some people are tall, there are still a lot of people who are, like, my height and shorter. We’re just diverse, I guess.”

Heading to the bathroom to wash his hands and the cloth out a little bit, Kokichi’s expression softened. “...he’s a good guy, right? He was always on the night patrol, so I’m not that surprised you didn’t see him… I barely saw him around and he worked here for years.”

When Kokichi came back out of the bathroom, putting his shirt back on, he looked...a little guilty, but mostly at peace. The kind of expression to wear when things turned out okay, but you still had a few regrets. “He quit last fall, after the vets came back. I think he’d wanted to quit for a while, but didn’t feel right about leaving the guardforce even more shorthanded. I heard he’s been taking on contract work for farms? Last I heard, he’s been doing pretty well.”

“Hmmm…” Kaito laid back down on his pillow, hugging it to himself a little, “... think the secretaries would have his forwarding address? We could send him a ‘thanks for not letting us all die’ letter. He might appreciate it. I think I’d want a thank you note if I saved a bunch of lives.”

Kokichi settled back down in the window seat, knowing that if he indulged in cuddling he’d conk right back out and miss the alarm in three hours. He chewed his lip a little but gave Kaito a nod. “I think so. If not they’d know how to ask around to find out where he is right now. It’d be nice to send a letter...though that’s really just the kind of person Fuyuji is.”

“...he’s the kind that really wants to make a difference in the community, you know? But the guardforce wasn’t...really what he was looking for. Considering everyone needs to eat, I think there’s a good shot he’ll find it with his new stuff…”

...Kokichi...wasn’t exactly sure if he should tell Kaito. Right now, his husband seemed pretty positive about Fuyuji, but...Kokichi knew how quickly that could turn around, and really...he just wished the best to the former guard. He was a good person.

“Yeah, I guess that’s another little culture difference I haven't really gotten my head around. No one here ever really wants a reward or thanks for doing… kinda anything, really.” Kaito mused, scratching his fingers through his hair. “Well… except maybe Miss Andou. Candy lady. I always get the impression she’s borderline furious with me because I’m not losing my mind over her sweets every time we visit.”

“We’ll do the letter thing then. He might not care about thanks, but, like, it’s not gonna hurt anything to do it, and I really should have done it a year ago. I just… man, I was so up my own butt back then.” Kaito laughed, shifting onto his back and kinda just grappling his pillow in a chokehold, staring tiredly at the ceiling, “...rode that horse to death. That was a shitty thing to do. Man, I was kinda out of my mind for a long minute there… ah well…”

Kaito looked over at Kokichi, admitting, “I think I might just be up, babe. Since I’m apparently not going back to sleep, want me to take the rest of your shift?”

Kokichi snorted, still looking a little distracted, but it was fading. “She takes a lot of pride in her craft. I think it’s just kinda people tend to be one extreme or the other? But I think it’s pretty common across the board that people find it distasteful to act all secretive about doing things for the praise. Either you find it noble to do things just because it’s the right thing to do, or you make clear your reasons otherwise. Fishing for praise kind of puts people off.”

And it tended to depend on what the person was doing. Going out of your way to help a neighbor wasn’t worth thanks, at least verbally. It was expected. But people enjoying your craft...there were plenty of people who just wanted to bring their work into the world, but plenty more that defined that as people having to enjoy that work too. He supposed the guards were at a weird intersection there, since their job was to be good to their neighbors, but most of the guards he talked to found their main motivation to be the intrinsic reward of helping people. Even his sister, who found herself leaping through the streets in joy after getting compliments, would still employ the same ethic if no one noticed she was there.

“I’m sure it’ll be a nice surprise to get,” Kokichi hummed. “People might not be expecting thanks, but it’s still nice to receive.” ...maybe he’d fill some time just...sending letters to people. It wasn’t the social letters from work, but...more personal. It’d be nice to catch up with people.

Kokichi sighed softly as Kaito reminisced over the past year. There had been some seriously shitty stuff that Kaito did at the beginning, there… But… “...I’m not saying it was alright, you know? But...you were constantly feeling in danger, and everything was unfamiliar… You weren’t just being a dick for no reason and...you recognize that. So I’ll at least give you some credit.”

...he was sorely tempted to take Kaito’s offer and go back to sleep. But even if Kaito’s rhythm was okay with it, getting out of their schedule would be a pain later. “...nah. You go do stuff for yourself if you’re awake. But I will accept some cuddles if you’re inclined,” Kokichi grinned, giving Kaito a wink.

“Mmmmmmmmm~” Kaito continued his death grip of his pillow for a moment, rubbing his face into it… before tossing it aside, getting up, “Yeah, alright. I’ll come to you though.”

Kaito, in nothing but his boxers because it was getting to be that time of year again, headed over and, not thinking about the window, said, “Scoot. Let me in, little spoon.”

Kokichi chuckled a bit and scooted forward, folding his body up to his legs while Kaito slid in behind him. He was suddenly reminded of their first late night talk in their room--still just Kokichi’s room at the time--probably because they were talking about the past. The two of them sitting opposite each other, Kokichi in similar pajamas, Kaito more clothed than this, comfortable in the summer air.

He found he much preferred sitting on the same side (and with Kaito bare).

Tipping his head back on Kaito’s chest when his husband stopped moving, Kokichi hummed happily. “...I really love you, Kai-chan.”

Kaito placed a quick kiss against Kokichi’s forehead, “Love you too, ‘Kichi.” Before gazing out the window. “...it’s gonna be a pretty day.”

Kokichi gave another pleased hum, snuggling back against Kaito, declaring to himself that he would not fall asleep like this, because Kaito would probably carry him to bed when the alarm went off and take over his baby shift even though Kokichi wanted to stick to it. Because Kaito was considerate and would want to let his husband rest if he was going to be awake anyway, regardless of the boundaries they set up to try and prevent any of them from getting overly tired and stressed out.

...good intentions weren’t always the best things to follow…

...the pit of guilt in his stomach got deeper.

Kokichi didn’t even look at Kaito’s reflection in the window as he stared out into the distance, the sky clear enough already to see the vague shapes of the mountains in the distance. “...I think Fuyuji never wanted to be a guard but...felt like he had to make things up to me and my dad, so...he put himself in a position of community service...in a way. And then...stuck around ‘cause of the shortage…”

Kaito’s eyes were on the gardens below. Spring had brought everything back to life, made things pretty and colorful. It was way less now than it had been, but the tree pollen still sometimes littered the air in the late spring weather, and Kaito loved that. Spring in Dicea was really pretty. Kaito was sad to see the end of it. Guess he’d have to wait another year… that was alright. Summer and fall and, hell, even winter had its moments…

“Your dad do him a good turn?” Kaito asked. Basically idly.

‘By not losing his mind on him,’ Kokichi dryly thought.

“...you know that when I was really little...even through up the start of the war, a bit, things were structured really differently in Dicea? Fuyuji had been a part of this group called the Carolers...I guess you could call them freedom fighters, in a way, though reading up on them I’d call ‘em more like...union resource workers…”

Kokichi pressed his cheek to one of Kaito’s pecs, enjoying the firm, yet cushion-y feeling. “...there was a lot of abuse of power. People taking advantage of their workers, hoarding wealth… The Carolers helped people set up local unions, but they were kinda… If the people they were working against used strike breakers, or tried to threaten people into not forming unions ‘n stuff...the Carolers used direct action. Breaking in and forming strikes at their opponents’ homes, using annoyance tactics to make changes, sometimes just straight up stealing physical wealth to re-distribute… They weren’t lawful, but the laws weren’t enough to protect people, so they took matters into their own hands.”

...it was a matter of debate and personal opinion, Kokichi supposed. It seemed right to him for people to start making their own rules as a group if they weren’t protected by laws, but he really believed that the people making the laws should’ve had conversations with people before it got to that point and made those new rules into law before violence broke out. He knew it wasn’t always so easy to change policy with debate, though.

Kokichi chewed on his lip, looking more at the glass right in front of them than anything outside. “...apparently they got rumors that...instead of declaring an heir, Aiichi was passing down the leadership through lineage. Think they thought I was a teenager or something…”

‘...oh.’ Kaito thought idly, as he listened to the story, ‘Another idiot, huh?’

The thought didn’t really match his feelings. Like every time one of these stories came up, an old, tense… anger welled up in him. Disgust. A repulsion that anyone would have even considered…

But Kaito soothed that anger and hatred and revulsion with the same thought he had been using since Katsuki had talked to him… oh, Kaito couldn’t remember. Before Maki left, he was pretty sure.

No one else had ever, actually, touched Kokichi.

...Just Kaito.

“Sounds like things were complicated. Though, things are complicated everywhere… so. How were these heroes of the people planning to off the child minding his own business?” Kaito grinned, “And I’m guessing Fuyuji changed his mind when he saw you… what? Waddling around in diapers? A toddler? Six?”

He knew the questions were mean spirited. He took a steadying breath, before looking back down at the gardens, muttering, “Cause, ya know, obviously he didn’t do it.”

Kokichi quietly let out the breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding. Sure, Kaito was pissed, but...it wasn’t an overwhelming heat of fury. Just kind of...dismayed. Still not great, but...this kind of conversation would never be great.

“Most of the group went to ambush my dad and demand to be heard, while Fuyuji went around to intercept me...I think he was...maybe nineteen? He’s still a pretty young guy…”

“I was eight,” Kokichi sighed. “Still had my arm in a cast from that stair accident. I was tired of sitting down and reading and...I don’t remember. I think I was just walking around pouting, throwing a tantrum. I got excited when I saw this, just, giant of a guy, you know? I was getting a little stir-crazy and went off on ‘im, asking all sorts of stuff.”

Kokichi smiled grimly. “He thought I was the kid of someone who worked there and had fucked off from daycare or something. I know I was being an annoying little shit, but he answered all my questions in the kinda...stoic, blunt way he talks? Not that you’d know, I guess… Since that was his MO at the time, I think we started talking about communal wealth distribution...we really got on the same page, and were kind of hyping each other up about it?”

“Then we passed by where my dad’s office was, and he was...yanno, doin’ his thing. Making friends with people who’d want to wring his neck, looked like after wrestling and a few punches, though I dunno if that was before or after they’d all agreed to talk.”

Kokichi sneered a bit. “And I said something like, ugh, dad’s having a big meeting, we shouldn’t bother him, and Fuyuji put it together. I don’t remember everything they said, but he just picked me up and showed me to the others and was like, this is Kokichi Ouma,” Kokichi mimicked, his voice going deep and monotone, “And I swear Fuyuji might’ve committed a different murder right then and there.”

“...dad ended up using a lot of the Carolers’ work in restructuring things, when he did all that. ‘Course he couldn’t condone the B&Es ‘n stuff, but they had a lot of good points.”

Kaito felt his stomach roll at that, and he looked away, having to compose himself. They had been going to murder his son...the only thing that had held them back was roughly six years… and he had still worked with them…

‘Like I’m any better.’ Kaito thought miserably, ‘Aiichi and I are two peas in a pod. Two peas in a shitty, horrifying pod…’

That was some of Kaito’s big fears, when it came to being a member of Kokichi’s family. Assisnation attempts… they just didn’t seem to matter. To the Ouma’s. Dicea came first. They had literally tried to kill Kokichi, like, five times, but Union Deals still needed to be worked out…

What did Kaito have any right to judge though. His family hadn’t cared about any of their children's lives either. Maybe that was just… normal. Kaito glanced at Miyako’s crib and tried to imagine handling an attack against Miyako. Against Timothy. His stomach tightened in nausea.

“...well, that’s good.” Kaito murmured, because there was nothing he could say that would make any of it better. Though… “...what time of the year did that happen in?” Kaito asked, the morbid thought not leaving him alone, “Do you remember?”

...something pinged in Kokichi’s head and he turned, fixing Kaito with a fierce glare. “We can’t jail people for intent, and you can bet your ass my dad fought tooth and nail to bring down any sort of verdict he could on the people that wanted to hurt me. It all happened years ago, and it’s not like they went home and applied for a job the day after--they did their time and penalty, and a few wanted to prove more to Aiichi and me that they’d changed. They wanted to give back to us, as an apology.”

“They did things that had the potential to be horrifying. Things that terrified me for years in some cases. Things that were wrong. But they are not monsters, and neither are you. The only difference is that I’ve intervened every time to make damn sure no one’s pressing charges against you.”

Kokichi’s glare intensified. “But if anyone tried to come after Miya? Or Tim? I’d protect them with everything I have. I already do. No one is going to touch our children. That kind of childhood dies with me.”

Huffing, Kokichi turned away to look out the window again, not having it in him to look at Kaito, at least for a moment. “...it was winter, I think. Reason I wasn’t loitering outside.”

Kaito jolted slightly, giving Kokichi a somewhat shocked look. He had said…? Though… maybe Kokichi had been able to tell by his tone, how hard Kaito was judging those people. His body language. Kaito doubted he was being subtle.

And, as usual, the best way to get Kaito off his high horse was reminding him of his own sins and failings, Kaito looking away, ashamed. Right… he knew that. He knew. “Sorry.” Kaito murmured. “I know you’d protect the kids babe… you already vowed too. I know… sorry…”

Winter… when had Waku said hers was? She had tried to kill him for his birthday! That’s right, so that would make her a summer murderer too... And Katsuki hadn’t told him, he was pretty sure. Kaito should stop asking that. Dividing up the year in ‘when who tried to kill Kokichi’ was a morbid thought that just kept hurling its way into Kaito’s morbid sense of humor every time this happened. He was definitely the summer months. Kaito did all his Kokichi-murdering in the summer… Fuyuji winter… between himself, Waku, and Fuyuhi, that’s two seasons taken care of… if Kaito was lucky, maybe the guy who threw himself off the tower did it in the spring...stop.

No one else had ever laid a hand on Kokichi. Just Kaito. Leader of the Kokichi-murder boards. Kaito probably only wasn’t out raising a garden because Kokichi just kept… endlessly hiding how shitty Kaito was from people…

“...I think…” Kaito said, feeling like a coward even as he said it, “I want to take a bath. Is that alright, babe?”

Kokichi deflated a little, taking in the...almost...like...kowtow-ed-ness in Kaito’s voice. He ran a hand over his face, taking a breath. “I’m sorry...I shouldn’t have snapped at you like that… I just...it scares me when you start getting on a track like...violence against our family is okay and normal, and like it wouldn’t matter if someone tried to hurt our kids… It’s not. I’ve just had over a decade to process things and...that makes me more casual than these matters deserve. It’s not fair to you to present it like it’s always been that way, when you sometimes have only had a few moments or a few months to process. It’s new to you, even if it’s not to me.”

“And...you know? I promised to protect you...so I have been. But...I also believe that...stuff like being separated from me? Maybe it’s toxic in my own right, but I don’t think that would help you. I don’t think being away from the people you know would’ve helped at all...so we’ve found different ways.”

...it scared Kokichi sometimes how morbid and despairing Kaito got over all this. But he had to keep reminding himself--Kokichi had had a decade to be morbid and scared and desperate in trying to process everything. He’d had a decade to slowly get to know some of the people that terrified him, to see them as people, and see them grow as people, and slowly reach out to him, presenting that growth as their apology. He’d had time.

Kaito hadn’t. Kaito had grown up around people always hiding their intentions and natures, where closed doors meant different things than open ones. Kaito was trying to process horror that had happened spread out among years to Kokichi, and had been given a cushion of time, in under one, while having to coexist with people who weren’t actively working towards their apologies.

...he had to remember this for the next time they had therapy.

Sighing, Kokichi patted around for one of Kaito’s hands, placing a delicate kiss on it. “Yeah, it’s fine with me. I’ll be here if you need anything. I’m sorry for getting...all up on you. I should’ve just explained what I wanted.”

...had… Kaito said all of that?

Oh, he had definitely thought it. But he… “Sorry. I mean, it’s okay.” Kaito said, watching Kokichi place a small kiss against his hand, as Kaito said (with some uncertainty. He must have, right?), “But, sorry, I… I hadn’t meant to say those things to you. That was unkind, I would have gotten angry too. I’m sorry, ‘Kichi.”

Kaito leaned forward, pressing an apologetic kiss against Kokichi’s shoulder, then his cheek, before still taking his escape route. Pulling himself out from behind Kokichi, Kaito was just going to give himself a little time in the tub. He’d be right here if Kokichi and Miyako or Shuichi needed anything, he wasn’t going to the shrine, he just… honestly, he just wanted a moment to be mad at himself. Why the fuck had he said any of that out loud? No wonder his husband had gone off on him, Kaito had fucking accused him of not caring if Miyako was attacked.

He’d be more careful next time. He was probably just tired.

“I appreciate being forgiven, but...it’s really not,” Kokichi sighed. “I shouldn’t snipe at you like that. At least not right away, not giving you a chance to explain.” It was like bringing a group of freedom fighters rearing for a fight to a castle before trying to schedule a meeting.

“...okay. If you are worried about that stuff, that’s the kind of thing I wanna hear about, okay? I don’t want you or our kids to feel unsafe. And I promise to be more cool-headed.” Scooting forward again, Kokichi watched his husband go with a forlorn smile. They’d figure it out, but...he wished he’d handled that better.

...he wished he could let Kaito feel safe.

...though...considering what Kaito had said before, he’d really never felt safe, had he.

Kokichi peered into the crib as the bathroom door clicked shut. “...I hope I can manage to protect you, Mi-Mi. Your carefree smile is all I want…”

Shuichi hadn’t been going to interfere. He had woken up halfway through that, and heard the two murmuring to each other, and while it had sounded tense, it hadn’t felt like Shuichi’s place to pipe up when they were trying to deal with something on their own. So he had closed his eyes and tried to go to sleep.

...and like Kaito, had gotten increasingly confused when Kokichi had just gone off on a really specific tangent. Which wasn’t entirely strange, Kokichi did tend to ‘mind read’ as Dr. Mariah called it, probably just making leaps in logic based on Kaito’s increasingly sour mood.

But then Kaito’s confused response to Kokichi’s leaps suggested that Kokichi had gotten more than ballpark right. With the way Kaito responded, it had sounded like Kaito had been convinced he had actually said those arguments aloud.

Which was… strange.

Shuichi had thought about dismissing it. Going back to sleep. Kokichi had guessed what Kaito was thinking, and Kato had confused himself. It really wasn’t Shuichi’s place to interfere, the two had some issues they needed to work out about Kokichi’s past and Kaito’s place in it… but Shuichi couldn’t let go of how confused Kaito had sounded.

Shuichi held off for about forty minutes, before sighing, groaning as he got up. “G’morning… Kaito in the bath?” Shuichi asked, like he didn’t know. Still not quite up to admitting he had evesdropped, though it wouldn’t be a leap in logic if Kokichi saw through the flimsy work-around.

He wasn’t asleep.

But it was still early, and he was tired...and kind of tired out. Kokichi hated arguing with Kaito, even if they had gotten a lot better about it. He felt like he had the beginnings of a headache too. Nothing too bad, he didn’t think, but...it was still kind of annoying.

Kokichi was stretched out in the window seat, his head tipped back against the wall and his eyes closed, through when Shuuichi spoke up, there wasn’t any hesitation--or wake up time--before Kokichi hummed lowly and nodded.

...he wasn’t sure what Shuuichi had to be...guilty? No...tentative, about.

“...I snapped at him earlier. We talked it out but...I still feel bad. He’s been cooling off in there. And probably just enjoying a relaxing bath too.”

“I’m sure you two are working through it, but I need my next painkiller, so…” Shuichi sighed, getting up. He honestly was doing a lot better, he would probably be off them entirely in a day or two, but it still ached terribly. “I’ll go in there for my meds and make sure he’s not sulking too much.”

Shuichi shuffled over to the bathroom door, before glancing over at Miyako-- she was looking good-- and looking to Kokichi, -- he was looking less good-- and shuffling over to him, leaning down to give him a soft kiss against his temple. “Good morning again. I love you.”

Kokichi opened his eyes at that and gave Shuuichi a smile. It had been really relieving, seeing Shuuichi get back on his feet steadily these last few days. “Good morning. I love you too. It’s going to be a really nice day… If you’re feeling up to going to your office, it might be nice to open a window. Enjoy the breeze and fresh air and all.”

“That’s a good idea.” Shuichi smiled, giving him another soft kiss, before straightening up with a slight grunt.

Heading to the bathroom, Shuichi opened the door a nudge, “Kaito, I’m coming in.”

“Course, handsome.” Kaito rumbled back, shifting in the water, the bathroom full of steam. A heavy scent of… coffee? Or, well, not quite.

“What’d you put in the bath?” Shuichi asked, grabbing a glass of water and putting in the painkiller tablets.

“Ummmm, salt and one of those little dissolving ball things? I dunno who gave it to us, but someone gave us a whole bundle of these different bath bomb things. This one smells kinda like coffee. Who knew?” Kaito sighed, before grinning warmly as Shuichi sat down at the closed toilet, “You visiting?”

“I thought I might.” Shuichi said gently, “You and Kokichi had a fight.”

“No, not really… I just put my foot in my mouth. Classic Kaito.” Kaito shrugged, his hair laying limp over his face and neck. “I said some stuff I shouldn’t.”

“You didn’t though… also, you look like you’re boiling in there. How is your skin not hurting?”

“I like it when the water scalds a little…” Kaito gave Shuichi a briefly curious look, before chuckling, “You sneak. How much did you hear?”

“I’m not sure. Maybe half.”

“Well… yeah. Then you know. I accused Kokichi of just, like… not caring if one of us was attacked. Cause his father sure as hell didn’t… or…” Kaito sighed, waving his hand vaguely, “No, he did. Saying shit like that is what got Kokichi ticked at me. I’m just being… mean and weird to everyone again.”

“You didn’t say any of that, though.” Shuichi said softly, “I was listening.”

“I didn’t? …” Kaito chuckled, “I’m just real easy to read then. Kokichi had me dead to rights. I hate hearing about all that shit that happened to him as a kid… god, it makes my stomach twist.”

Shuichi still felt like Kokichi had done a little more than ‘guessed’, but… even thinking that, it didn’t lead anywhere. Not to anything actually possible. Kokichi was really good at reading when other people were uncomfortable, but man, it had seemed… like Kaito had just been convinced he had said it aloud…

But before Shuichi could say any of that, Kaito mused, “I think I’m the worst person Kokichi’s ever met.”

“...uh huh.” Shuichi said dryly, “You do know he met Tom and Itch, right? They were acquainted. He knew Tengan too.”

“Annnnnd~ I am still the worst one.” Kaito grinned, staring blearily at nothing, a little overheated, “Maki said--”

“Oh, this should be good.”

“-- Maki said--” Kaito started again, glaring at Shuichi lightly, “That someone is only as bad as much as a problem they continue to be. Head Secretary Tengan is probably dead, Tom and Itch are tucked away in some garden somewhere for… hopefully a while, though no one can really give me a straight answer on that. Something about… evaluations and psych tests and… ugh.”

“He met the Budd family…”

“Dead! No longer a problem.”

“Okay… he knows myself and Maki.” Shuichi offered dryly.

Kaito frowned at that, “You two are delightful. I am a monster that Kokichi’s barely kept out of jail. Or, the gardens. Or whatever. Banishment? I guess I could have been banished.”

“Would you stop feeling sorry for yourself?” Shuichi sighed, “You know you’re not the worst person Kokichi’s ever met, you’re just being over dramatic.”

“I am also the most extra person he’s ever known.”

“That might be true.” Shuichi admitted, “Maybe I should go get Maki. She’s better at these kind of pep talks than I am.”

“Her pep talks mostly amount to cutting me and calling me pathetic.”

“But they work, which is largely the point.”

“You don’t know that. Maybe she just intimidates me into not complaining anymore. Maki can be very intimidating.” Kaito pouted, “...it’s weird that Tengan’s dead, right? That’s not just me?”

Shuichi raised an eyebrow at the sudden change in topic, before shrugging, “It’s more a relief than anything, if he is.”

“Yeah...it’s a good thing…” Kaito frowned, “I know that.”

“I feel like this is all going to be a longer conversation, and a part of me still wants Maki for backup.” Shuichi sighed, rubbing his side. “Can we talk about this later, when you’re out of the bath and I’m not sitting on a toilet?”

“...Yeah.” Kaito huffed, before giving Shuichi a fond look, “Thanks for checkin’ in on me, handsome. But I’m okay. Like you said, I’m just feeling pretty extra today. All whiney and mopey.”

“That’s alright, Kaito. I just can’t talk about it sitting here. It’s to hard on my sides.” Shuichi sighed, “We’ll talk more about it later. And cool down your water, it feels like a sauna in here.”

“Kaaaaay~”

Shuichi headed out, wiping his forehead as he shuffled back towards the bed, just wanting to sit for a moment before he thought about getting dressed. “He keeps things too hot when he uses the bath. I don’t know how he stands it.”

Kokichi could hear murmurs from the bathroom, but not the words. And he was alright with that. There were problems between Kokichi and Kaito, but just because it was their mess to sort out didn’t mean that having other people weigh in, or even just there to support them wasn’t important and hugely helpful.

(...and while Kaito still felt down...it was easing.)

Snorting softly, Kokichi offered a short shrug, though he opened his eyes and smiled at Shuuichi from the start this time. “I mean, you guys are pretty into saunas and all that. I imagine when he’s taking a bath instead of a shower it’s the same thing.”

...a passing, worried thought faded the smile on his face. “...he’s not...burning himself or anything, right? I know you’d stop it if you saw, but…”

Shuichi huffed at that, giving Kokichi a grim, knowing look as he said, “That isn’t Kaito’s style of self-harm. That’s more a you and I thing.”

Shuichi sat down, instinctively still touching his stomach as he did so, like he had to steady himself, and like always was a little surprised when there was nothing there. Now that the pain was easing these days, Shuichi felt a little lighter on his feet. Less awkward and clumsy. It wasn’t necessarily true, but he felt it. His body only a little strange.

Shuichi looked at Kokichi a bit, “...how did you do that, earlier?” he asked, “When you were talking to Kaito, it was like you read his mind. Did you notice you did that? Because, if you did, and you still let Kaito think he had said all of that… I’m both you and Kaito’s partner, Kokichi. And I already know you feel guilty for doing it to him once, so I won’t be complacent if I see you gaslighting him again.”

Kokichi looked to the side. That was true. Kaito would run himself into the ground trying to help people out, but he wasn’t going to flay himself any more, and he wouldn’t take a too hot bath to make the pain on the outside match how it felt on the inside. Kokichi really didn’t want to do that to himself anymore either, but...he had a past, and it wasn’t something he could just ignore.

That’s what started all of this anyway.

Pressing his lips together, Kokichi looked back at Shuuichi, momentarily confused, about to ask how he did what, but as Shuuichi continued… More than anger, a frantic worry shined in his eyes as Kokichi sat up, cheeks flushing in...not outrage or embarrassment, but something like it.

“...what are you talking about, of course I feel horrible for… What do you mean? I wasn’t… I mean, I’m aware of the kinds of things he was feeling while we were talking, but I wasn’t...I’m really trying not to mind read anymore, Shuu-chan.”

...at that, Shuichi relaxed a little. Something softer coming over his features as he said, “I see. So you really didn’t notice. I did worry for a moment. Letting him apologize for it felt… well, it felt like the sort of thing I would do. During my worst moments.”

Shuichi knew that, especially this last year, he had done quite a few things that, the more distance he put between himself and the event, the less… justified. He felt doing it. And there really was something to no longer being actively pregnant that had done, just, wonders for the general… heat. Inside of Shuichi. Not the heat of sexuality, but just the constant burning temperature of hosting a small body inside of himself. He felt clear-er headed, with Miyako safely out. More himself.

Shuichi gave Kokichi a sympathetic look, before saying, “You are very good at reading us. It’s not like you were wrong about how he was feeling, Kaito just confirmed it for me that you were a hundred percent correct in your assumptions. But he barely said anything at all, when you were explaining what happened when you were eight. He said basically that it had obviously worked out, that it was good, and asked around what time of year the incident happened. And it was like you were having a much longer conversation with him than that, responding to points he never brought up, which he then apologized for bringing them up. It was honestly a little astounding, how accurate you apparently were.”

Kokichi frowned a bit, still...utterly baffled but (where Shuuichi was worried and a little accusing, that was now gone, just worried and curious) not liking Shuuichi putting himself down...even if he could be manipulative at his worst. But...he hadn’t thought he let Kaito apologize. He thought they had just...mutually apologized for letting their instincts drive the carriage for a few moments.

...had that not happened?

...it wouldn’t be the first time he’d just...completely imagined things...creating a fictitious narrative to play off of the worst things his mind could think of… Wasn’t the first time he’d been thinking things that felt like him, but made no sense.

...Kokichi went very quiet, the worry slowly being mixed with fear in his eyes.

Even if he ended up being right...if Kaito...really didn’t say anything…

“...I really… I really thought he said something… I don’t…” His eyes started to dart around, hands clenching around the hem of his sleep shirt. ...Kaito and his dad just...kept saying he wasn’t crazy, and...he hadn’t been...that concerned but...he’d just hurt Kaito.

(I hurt Kaito with my powers.)

I hurt Kaito with my powers.

It was like Kokichi went entirely frozen. And in a very small, terrified voice, he said, “Get Temp.”

Shuichi gave Kokichi a worried look “...Kokichi, it’s okay. You didn’t realize anything was happening, I wasn’t trying to be alarming… did you say to get Tem--”

Neither of them had noticed the sound of the bath draining, but the room filled with steam as Kaito came out in a towel, using a second towel to wipe his hair as he said, “Alright, alright, maybe I did leave it on too hot. It just felt nice and warm! But I could start to feel myself getting a little dizzy after Shuichi-- oh, no, baby, I’m sorry, no no.”

Kaito, unaware of anything else going on, assumed that Miyako started WAILING because the heat of the steam had disturbed her, crying as Kaito hurried over to the window, saying, “‘xcuse me, babe, let me get around you, just gonna open the window. Oh, Miya, I’m sorry, dad’s sorry, oh… shoot.”

Kaito then hurried over to the crib, reaching down to pick her up as he soothed, “Oh, no, dad made everything all hot and muggy, he’s the worst… poor Miyako… M~iiiiyaaaa… sorry, guys, I wasn’t thinking.” Kaito apologized, looking to Shuichi and Kokichi apologetically as he gently swayed the baby in his arms, Shuichi still frowning at Kokichi. “Everything okay?”

“...I think…” Shuichi said, “I’m going to try taking a walk today.”

Kokichi’s eyes locked onto Miyako as she started crying, even if Kaito got to her first before he could unlock his body, already accustomed to focus on her at the sound of any kind of distress. Even distress that wasn’t hers.

I hurt Kaito (with my powers) Miya’s (an Empath too) she’ll hurt she’ll feel it you need to calm down you can’t keep doing this you’re an adult you have a child to care for (if she feels you you’ll hurt her too) stop.

Kokichi blinked, all that tenseness and worry and terror just...completely gone, his shoulders dropping into a relaxed state. Really...there wasn’t much of anything in his gaze anymore.

“I guess that’s something new to be aware of too,” he commented without any sort of undertone, getting up to peer blankly at Miya. “Sorry, Miya-Miya…”

Blinking blankly at Shuuichi, Kokichi gave him a nod. “If you feel okay with it, but don’t strain yourself. Enjoy the sunshine.”

“Woah, woah, what?” Kaito asked, nowhere near as comfortable with that idea, looking in alarm between Kokichi and Shuichi as he gently bounced Miyako, wondering if maybe he should try the pacifier idea, “Uh, are you sure you can… you haven't been out of the castle since our last therapy session, handsome--”

“I’ll ask Maki to come with me.” Shuichi said, giving Kokichi a long, concerned look. What was happening? What was that? It was like everything had just bled out of Kokichi all at once. Shuichi, for the first time in a while, reached into his nightstand to pull out his pocket journal, and a pen, knowing he’d want both as he said, “...Kokichi? Could you help me get dressed? Kaito’s hands are full.”

Kaito wanted to insist one of them go with him, but… Kokichi didn’t seem worried. Maybe he was over-reacting. And, if Maki was going… “Could you maybe bring the wheelchair with you? I hate the idea of you stuck somewhere cause your sides gave out on you…”

“I think I’ll be okay. If I’m wrong, I’ll send Maki back to grab it with an apology and a ‘You told me so’” Shuichi said gently.

Kokichi blinked slowly, looking from Miya to Shuuichi. Kaito could handle her. “Sure thing, Shuu-chan. What do you want to wear today? I’ll go get ‘em from the closet.”

He wasn’t moving mechanically or stilted or anything. Just...there was no excited bounce, or worried looks over his shoulder. No biting his lip or scrunching his nose or balling his hands in his clothes, or wide, exaggerated gestures. Just...simple movements, fluid and unbothered.

“I hope you two have a nice walk, and don’t be shy to take a break on any benches, even if you don’t want to use the wheelchair. Though I know Maki won’t let you overdo yourself either.”

“I will…” Shuichi let Kokichi help him get dressed, and when he was finished, went and put on his hat, adjusting his blazer a little as he put his journal and pen away.

...he caught his reflection in the mirror, and his eyes widened slightly. Something warm squeezing in his chest and stomach as he felt himself just taking a moment to stare. It wasn’t… perfect but…

… he looked like himself…

“Handsome? Are you okay?” Kaito asked, ruffling through the baby bag with one hand as Miyako screamed and wailed, pulling out the pacifier and, not sure if there was a more effective way to do it, just kinda offering it to her like a nipple-bottle. He asked because it kinda looked like his boyfriend wanted to cry, though it was hard for him to focus on that with a screaming infant in his arms.

“Yes,” Shuichi said, adjusting the brim of his cap a bit. “I’m fine. I’ll be back, okay? The three of you hold tight.”

And, though he was still pretty slow, Shuichi was full of adrenaline and enthusiasm as he headed out, heading to Maki’s room, a detective on the case.

“...”

“...So,” Maki said, as the two headed back to the castle, long past noon, having been out for most of the day now, “I feel like I should be the one to say that he might be entirely full of shit.”

“He knew what we were going to say and do before we did it.” Shuichi said, staring at his new several pages of notes, the two moving slowly and him basing his directions mostly on Maki’s movement. “He got it right every time.”

“We’re predictable people. Of course I was going to take a knife to him.”

“But he knew you were going to put him on his knees with that kick when he was guessing what I had written in my journal.”

“I wanted to make certain he wasn’t peeking somehow. Eyes on a mirror or--”

“Right. And he knew that.”

“...well, it still could have been just very good guess’s.”

“He knew your most embarrassing memory.”

“We do not discuss that.” Maki suddenly seethed, looking around nervously, “I should have killed him.”

“He knew about Kaito’s mentor…”

At that, Maki had no real argument. The parlor tricks hadn’t been enough to soothe either of their paranoid accusations, and eventually, Temp had started going bolder. Picking memories out of their head, things there were just… no way he could know. Impossible and accurate… and once Maki had calmed down, Temp had explained a dozen more impossible things…

Shuichi had written it all down, in his formula short-hand. It was easier to write it down than to process it. It was, admittedly, all a little much.

He wasn’t sure if he believed most of it. He would have to sit down and really process it. But when he had explained what had sent him to Temp in the first place, the man had frowned, and said when he got home, to try and draw Kokichi into a nap with Shuichi, and they’d work it all out together from there.

“I still don’t understand, if you three are… ‘going somewhere’ when you’re asleep, why I am not allowed to come.” Maki snarled, genuinely irritated, “I can sleep. I can nap.”

“He seemed afraid of you coming… maybe holding a knife to him made him nervous of you.” Shuichi said idly, before saying, “If this actually works? I think I’d feel safer knowing you were with Miya and Kaito, actually. If… if what he said about Miyako was true…”

“It’s okay.” Maki said again, clutching Shuichi’s shoulder, squeezing it tightly, “We’re handling it. Nothings changing. Whatever she is, whatever she can do… Miyako is your daughter, and I will not let you handle this alone. We can do this.”

“Thank you, Maki.” Shuichi said softly. “So… yes. Timothy and the girls went to the park with Hajime today, right? You can spend time with Kaito and Miya while I… try to help Kokichi? I guess?”

“Yes. Though, with any luck, maybe they’re all already asleep again any… way…”

Both Shuichi and Maki went quiet as they headed down the hall. It was faint, but…

Miyako was still crying, Kokchi was acting weird, and Kaito was starting to freak out a little as he groaned into his hands, Miyako thrashing and wailing on the changing table, as he groaned, “I don’t know what else to try… Miya, what? Why are you so upset?” Kaito asked, his tone practically begging.

She had calmed down enough to eat once, and at once point it looked like she might go to sleep, but every time things calmed down, Miyako would suddenly get this alarmed, frustrated look on her face, start kicking, and then start screaming again. It had been going all. Day. Long.

It had been hours. But there was no sign of frustration on Kokichi’s face. Something that looked like a bare shadow of worry, and it was clear that Kokichi thought that Miyako continuing to wail was a problem. He had dutifully gone with Kaito through everything they could think of, food, diaper changes, cuddling, tickling, trying to speak in funny voices--though...his was a bit flat…--and Kokichi had even begun to sing--and while the notes were there...there was just something wrong. There was something so wrong about the so, so human expression of singing without any emotion to it--but...nothing was working.

“I don’t know what to do…” Kokichi said softly. “Should I get my dad?”

(...once upon a time, Alter Ego had tasked Kokichi with hiding information from him. An exercise of not letting people dig through his brain. Kokichi had been working for weeks trying to create a mental barrier that could fend off a hivemind.)

Kaito had been hoping to avoid that. He knew it was irrational, but he felt so ashamed that they couldn’t get Miyako to calm down. Why were they struggling so much? Why was she so unhappy? If Ikou came here and he just knew what was wrong with her, Kaito was going to feel like such an idiot…

“Yes.” Kaito still said, desperate-- god, was it even healthy for a baby to cry this much?? She looked like she was in pain-- as he looked to Kokichi, who at least seemed to be handling all of this… fine??? Almost effortlessly, really. How was Kokichi keeping it together, Kaito felt like the ends of his hair were on fire, “Can you? Please? Maybe he’ll know what to do??”

Kokichi nodded and with one more barely worried look at Miyako, headed out of their room, set to track down Ikuo. The man was probably in another wing, if not outside if he hadn’t already heard Miyako crying.

(What Kaito, Shuuichi, and Maki could observe was pretty much what the average person would see. Kokichi, the same kind, gentle person who cared about his family as he always was, but just...something a little wrong. A little missing.

To an Empath, and even more to a strong Empath, what they would feel would be horrifying. Unless they were the sick kind to get a kick out of seeing a husk of a person. A person with a body, but just...nothing inside.)

As Kokichi left the room, Kaito picked Miyako up again, feeling stupid as he whispered desperately, “M~iiiiyaaaaa… oh, please, Miyako…. M~iyaaaaa.”

The big, empty, scary feeling was gone, but Miyako wasn’t quite ready to stop crying, because now her whole body hurt from crying, she had barely eaten, and she was TIRED again! And Big Warm Smell was also TIRED and SAD. And everything was TRAGIC, and this was the WORST THING THAT HAD EVER HAPPENED.

So Miyako let everyone know that, as Maki and Shuichi hurried inside, seeing a stressed out, worn down Kaito trying to soothe a screaming Miyako, Shuichi looking around in alarm as he said, “Kaito, where’s Kokichi?”

“Oh?” Kaito’s head shot up, having not noticed the others at all as he said, “Oh! You guys are here! You’re back! Oh… shoot, I’m sorry, I haven't been able to… Kokichi and I have tried everything… guys I don’t know what to do--”

“Let me try something.” Maki said, heading over with a determined expression, as Shuichi sighed at Kaito’s obvious distress. The larger man clearly on the verge of tears.

Kaito handed Miyako to Maki, who gave Miyako a quick once-over, ensuring that the baby wasn’t actually injured or anything like that. Bouncing her slightly in her hands the same way Kaito had, Miyako waaaailing!!!!

“...” And then, in a shockingly high sing-song voice, Maki said, “Do you wanna go upside down?”

And she tilted Myako’s whole body backwards. Not actually going upside down entirely, but Miyako staring in baffled shock as her world view did a thoroughly unexplored up to this point 90 degree shift, stunned into silence as Maki then continued, “And then we go right side up.”

There was silence in the room, as Miyako just looked baffled.

...she gave a few surprised, frustrated gurgles, and Maki said, in the same tone voice, every inflection identical, “Do you wanna go upside down?”

Again, Miyako’s world view shifted. “And then we go right side up.”

“...oh my god is that actually working?” Kaito asked, staring at Maki as Miyako just gave a move confused look around, the world back to normal.

“Only if you manage to soothe her before she remembers why she’s upset.” Maki said simply, “It’s always only a temporary fix. What have you been doing to soothe, dad?”

“Uhhh, I mean--” more frustrated gurgles, as Kaito’s mind went blank, just sinking in the first real silence of the day “Uhhhh--”

Ikuo wasn’t going to hold things up if Miyako had been wailing for hours, but he really wanted to take Kokichi aside for a moment.

Kokichi was very good at hiding his emotions. But even he had tells, and while Ikuo had been absent for some of the more dramatic evolution, he knew how those tells started. But it didn’t look like Kokichi was barely holding it together, or that he had pushed things to the side for the sake of taking charge. It genuinely looked like there was nothing wrong at all.

And that...was wrong, since both he and Kokichi acknowledge that Miya having a fit like this was a big problem.

“My daughter’s been crying for hours, of course I’m not okay,” Kokichi had said in a frighteningly even tone.

Ikuo wasn’t an Empath. He wasn’t magic. But he knew something was very, very wrong.

As they got up to the third floor west wing hallway, Ikuo reached out, stopping Kokichi with a hand on his shoulder. “Sounds like yer guy managed ta get things under control. Jus’...wait here fer a sec, bunny.”

Kokichi would argue, wanting to see his husband and daughter, ask about what had happened...but his dad didn’t ask these sorts of things just for fun. So, while Ikuo went up to their door, knocking ever-so gently, Kokichi leaned against the wall on the other side of Maki’s room, staring into space.

“S me,” Ikuo said, just barely loud enough to be heard through the door. “Can I come in?”

“Come in, Ikou.” Shuichi called, as Ikou walked in to see Kaito and Maki both determinedly trying to sooth Miyako with the lamb and the pacifier, Maki trying to get Miya to take the pacifier, while Kaito tried to continue to distract Miya with the lamb dancing. Miya looked less than amused, her face still red from earlier, not quite crying anymore but looking constantly on the verge. “Where is Kokichi?”

Ikuo’s eyes softened, seeing Miyako’s distress, and it only gave him confidence that having Kokichi wait outside was a good call. “E’s waitin’ in th’ hall. D’ya know what happened to ‘im? Never seen ‘im shut down that much ever.”

Sighing softly, Ikuo tried to make himself a calming presence, the same sort of thing he’d do for a young Kokichi, curling up in his arms at night. “Poor gal. And poor Pop too. What have ya tried?”

“Shoot, what haven't I tried?” Kaito said, dropping the hand holding the lamb as he wiped his face down with his free one, “She honestly might just be hungry by this point? But the more upset she gets the less willing she is to take the bottle. The only reason she’s not screaming right now is Maki managed to surprise her and we’ve been keeping her distracted since. A-and, Kokichi shut down? After he left? Sheez, I’m not surprised, he’s been keeping calm all day. I feel like I’m about to lose my mind too.”

Shuichi frowned, looking at the hallway door. “...I’ll go check on him.” he said, deciding three people on ‘sooth Miyako’ duty was enough, as he headed outside.

Taking a breath-- adrenaline and purpose had kept Shuichi going all day, but phew… he was starting to get really worn down. Those stairs were nightmares. Shuichi steadied himself on the wall, as he saw Kokichi staring into space. “... Kokichi?” Shuichi called softly, “...I did as you asked. I spoke to Temp.”

Ikuo frowned softly, but...they could deal with that in a moment. Whatever had happened to Kokichi was bad, but he knew that if his son was in a way to communicate anything, he’d want Ikuo to make sure Miyako was alright first. “Alrigh’... Ain’t yer fault, but she’s gon’ be upset if yer upset, but ‘a course yer stressed ‘n exhausted. So take a breath, Kaito. An’ she’s prolly in a bit ‘a pain from cryin’ so long, so try an’ soothe her body too…”

As Ikuo took control of the situation inside the room, Kokichi looked up at Shuuichi blankly out in the hall.

“Did I say that? Oh. I hope you had a good conversation. How was your walk?” It was all the words of a loving, interested partner. Said in a flat, even, unfatigued tone.

Shuichi tilted his head slightly at Kokichi. Glancing over his shoulder at the bedroom, he knew things were still hectic in there…

But that was why he had asked Maki to help. And Ikou helping would move things along too. Kaito wasn’t being left on his own to deal with this. Shuichi didn’t feel like a bad partner, as he took Kokichi’s hand and said, “Come to my study with me. Please.”

Kokichi frowned, ever so faintly. “Are you okay? Is Miya? We really should go help take care of her, right?”

Shuichi had hoped Kokichi might be far gone enough to be just entirely susceptible, but…

… Shuichi suddenly lowered his hat in embarrassment, taking a shaky, pained breath as he said softly, “...Please help me, Kokichi. Kaito was right, I… I overdid it. I don’t want to go in there and distract everyone, but I need to lie down soon… I-I feel so ridiculous, Kaito knew this would happen… I just want to go to my office...”

Kokichi’s frown didn’t deepen, but it did remain. He went over to Shuuichi’s side, his touch gentle but steady to support his partner. “There’s no shame in admitting you went over your limits, even if someone warned you. But if you want to get some rest, our room probably won’t be the right place. Come on.”

His words and touch were gentle, but not warm. He was a dependable body, helping Shuuichi over towards the few southern rooms, taking care of his partner.

...it wasn’t right.

“Thank you, Kokichi…” Shuichi said softly, letting himself lean his weight on his boyfriend, shuffling to the office.

Temp had said to get him asleep. To fall asleep himself. That he’d be able to help Kokichi from there. “...I really need some rest… I feel like one wrong step could shatter me… please don’t leave me, Kokichi…”

Later, Shuichi might feel a bit bad about laying it on so thick. He was trying to be less manipulative towards his partners. But Kokichi didn’t seem… overwhelmed. He didn’t really seem anything. Shuichi sort of felt like he was a chore Kokichi was taking care of. Not one he resented, one he knew was worth doing, but… still just a chore. By this point, Shuichi just wanted to make certain that Kokichi didn’t decide something else was a higher priority.

So. He was laying it on thick. Letting Kokichi almost entirely support his weight, expressing his exhaustion and fear, repeating his embarrassment. “I feel like if I go back to the room Kaito will just end up having to juggle taking care of me and Miya at the same time…”

When they got to the office, Kokichi brought Shuichi to the couch by the window, Shuichi sighing in relief as he finally sat down-- not entirely for show. It had been starting to hurt, honestly. Giving Kokichi a shuddering sigh, he laid back on the couch, grabbing the thin throw blanket decorating the base of the couch and starting to pull it around him as he said, “Kokichi? I have an extra painkiller in my desk. Will you put it together for me and lay down with me? Until I feel better?”

“I’ve got you, don’t worry. Should I get someone from medical to help? Don’t worry, I’ll let you lie down first.” Step by step, they made their way to Shuuichi’s study. Kokichi didn’t feel right about just leaving Miya with Kaito, since it had been throughout his shift that she started freaking out, and it wasn’t right to just up and leave because the clock ticked past 12, but Shuuichi needed help too. They could reconvene later.

Nodding, Kokichi got his boyfriend a glass of water and a painkiller, handing it over and...pausing, but ultimately sliding onto the couch beside Shuuichi. “Alright. Are you sure that I shouldn’t get a healer?”

“No, no, I know I just need rest. I just felt bad that with everything going on with Miyako, and me just deciding to go on a walk…” Shuichi sighed, giving Kokichi a soft, apologetic look, “Maybe this is just me being self-centered again, but I don’t want to take Kaito’s attention away from Miyako with this, because I’m embarrassed. And I don’t really want to be alone either… would you rest with me? Just until I feel strong enough to go help again?”

Shuichi drank his painkillers and sighed, settling into the couch and laying out, reaching out to Kokichi. “Please?”

“You’re allowed to be self-centered. It’s not a bad thing. And even with Miya, we thought we could handle it, so we were okay with you wanting to head out. But let’s all talk about it later, alright? When you’re feeling better.” It was caring, a considerate stance while paying attention to the limits and boundaries of their relationship, and their desire to be better towards each other. And Kokichi gave less intonation to it than he would’ve reading a grocery list.

Gently putting his arms around Shuuichi as they laid on the couch, Kokichi nodded. “I’ll be here for as long as you need me. I won’t go anywhere.”

...Kokich was creepy, like this. Shuichi hoped that whatever Temp claimed he could do, it was actually going to help. This wasn't the Kokichi Shuichi knew. If anything, maybe it was a blessing that Kaito had been so distracted by Miyako all day. If Shuichi hadn’t known better, he would have assumed Kokichi was mad at him and trying to subtly punish him with disconnected affection. It would have been bewildering.

Kaito would have taken it personally.

It was okay though. Shuichi held him, steadying his breathing, breathing in his scent. Shuichi was going to take care of this. Take care of them. Take care of Kokichi. If he could? Then he was going too.

It was Shuichi’s turn.

Temp had sent out a tether on Shuichi. It landed easily, and Temp waited until the tether informed him that Shuichi had fallen asleep. When he had?

Temp sent a quick message of intent to Alter Ego, asking him to meet them in Kokichi, before jumping into Shuichi’s mind.

Talking to a non-empath in their mind in a way they would remember required power and intent and actually very specifically knowing how to do it. It was easier to talk to memories and figments within a persons mind, who might give them echoes that something had happened, but it wasn’t like specifically talking to their surface thoughts. Memories were accommodating. They tended to be easier to work with and talk to than surface thoughts. They got less alarmed and less confused. They could read you back, a little.

But Temp wasn’t talking to a memory this time. So he went searching for the surface thoughts. The version of Shuichi that would remember what he was dreaming. The one that would remember not having dreams, of just blinking through the void. The one that was, currently, walking through his memories of the day…

Temp stepped into the memory Shuichi was currently re-living, staring as Kokichi whispered, “Get Temp.” before… all the emotion drained from his face. Kaito stepping out of the bathroom. And Miyako started screaming.

“...pardon, Shuichi.” Temp said gently.

Shuichi looked back at Temp, genuinely confused, as he looked around, “Temp, what are you doing here? We didn’t hear you come in, what…” Shuichi frowned, looking around, “...you weren’t… here? I went to go get Maki after this…”

Temp waited, patiently, as Shuichi looked around, Kaito and Kokichi not reacting to Temps presence at all, everything playing out as it had in real life… “...oh.” Shuichi said, looking down at himself, “...oh.”

Again, now that he was conscious? Shuichi’s mental projection of himself matched what Kokichi had first seen. His arms and thighs weren’t thick with pregnancy weight anymore, his hips were narrow, his chest flat. “I see.” Shuichi said, looking around, his yellow eyes focused and inquisitive as he looked Temp up and down. “...so, this was true… also, what are you wearing?”

“My robes.” Temp said, “It’s a religious thing, I’ll explain it to you later. I’m going to open a portal, and you and I are going to visit Kokichi’s mind. When we go? Its going to feel very strange to you. Maybe even alarming. And you real life body will be impossible to wake or disturb, you’re body will be running on autopilot. If it becomes too much, I will bring you back here. You are safe with me. Understand?”

Shuichi had more questions after Temp’s explanation than when he began, but… “If it will allow me to help Kokichi? Fine.” Shuichi said, lowering the brim of his hat, “Let’s go.”

Temp nodded, and his dog formed…

The Templar and Shuichi stepped into Kokichi’s mind.

The circus was still there. Beyond it, past the big top curtain, their room was still there. But neither were quite like how Temp or Alter Ego would’ve seen them.

The world of the circus was...somehow tilted. Literally. Like the whole world was at an angle, and yet everyone was still affixed to the ground. The drawing models were still going around, performing and touting food and wares and upcoming shows but…

Jugglers were fumbling their clubs, dropping them to the ground. The cotton candy wouldn’t spin into a cloud, stuck as clumped, stringy webs. The music in the air was off-key, littered with jarring incidental notes, and the callers would constantly contradict themselves, mixing up shows and times until no one could make any sense of what they were supposed to be hearing.

And the model usually managing the guest book was gone.

If anyone managed to get beyond the tent?

The princes’ room was more orderly but...empty. Devoid of any of the fond or even complicated memories that the room was built with. And the closet…

...when he had tried to hide his favorite color, Kokichi had chosen his closet. Because, even more than what the lock on their bedroom door meant, Kokichi truly felt like the closet was a sacred space. No one could get in.

...and inside it, Kokichi was curled up in the darkness, eyes scrunched shut and hands pressed firmly over his ears as he gasped unsteady breaths.

Temp and Shuichi both looked around, Temp in concern, Shuichi in awe. Shuichi a little dazzled by the sheer spectacle of the place, even if it was all a little… off. “Kokichi did say that he wanted to be a member of DICE when he was growing up, but I don’t think I ever really knew how a part of his identity it is…” Shuichi murmured, looking around at the fumbling jugglers and people on long wooden stilts that looked like they were just barely not falling, each step long and uncertain.

“...that is how this works, right?” Shuichi asked, looking to Temp, brow furrowed, “It… represents Kokichi? In here?”

“A good rule of thumb is to assume everything is a metaphor.”

“AUGH!” Shuichi screamed, jumping back as he looked down at the cat, it having just sorta appeared out of nowhere.

“...meow?” Alter Ego tried instead.

“No, you don’t get to pull that now. I just heard you speak.” Shuchi scolded, looking curiously at the cat, squatting down and inspecting its eyes and ears, “...Are you a metaphor for something in Kokichi too? Are you his love for cats or something?”

“I’m the love of cats of four different people.” Alter Ego explained, “It was the one thing they could all unanimously agree on. Cats are cool. So, here I am.”

“...that doesn’t really help my question any, if I’m honest.”

“My name is Alter Ego. I am a friend of your partners. I’m here to help.” Alter Ego said, bowing his feline body to Shuichi. “It’s lovely to meet you… again.”

Shuichi frowned at that, getting up to bow back respectfully. But before he could ask what ‘again’ meant, they were distracted by huffing. “Well, the guest book isn’t working, and no ones manning it.” Temp said, coming out of the circus tent. “Alter Ego?”

“I can get us in.” Alter Ego nodded, looking to Shuichi as he explained, “I have a key. Follow me and just… try not to overthink it, alright?”

Shuichi wasn’t sure what the cat meant by that, but as Temp and himself followed the golden feline, he noticed that the cat was getting smaller and smaller, heading under the folds of the tent. And Shuichi, following him, briefly thought ‘I can’t get small like that’... but Temp put a hand on his shoulder and whispered, “Don’t think about it. Just follow.”

So Shuichi just shrunk and shrunk and shrunk and the three followed into Alter Ego’s cat entrance, and… “...this is a little unsettling.” Shuichi admitted, looking around his emptied out bedroom. “Is Kokichi meant to be in here? Where is he?”

“Technically, this place is Kokichi, but if you mean where his surface thoughts are--”

“Temp,” Alter Ego sighed, “Don’t do that, it’s not helpful. Kokichi might not be in here, but as a rule, the mind tends to lead guests towards a representation of the person if you’re not actively fighting it. So if it brought us here? Kokichi is likely, if not here, then nearby…”

Alter Ego looked around. {Kokichi?} they called out, {Can you hear me?}

Kokichi cringed, squeezing his hands tighter around his head.

...the thing was, he knew he wasn’t a monster. He knew that he did good things with his abilities, things that genuinely helped his partners and other people. His powers gave him a lot of power, but like with any power, how you wielded it was far more important than the limits of your abilities.

Kokichi had grown to accept himself.

But half the time he didn’t know that. And now those two perceptions, two lives, almost, having grown just far enough apart since Kokichi had made them, were in direct conflict, crushing Kokichi in the middle.

He knew this wasn’t a...good form of protection, that he wasn’t saving himself or his family. He knew that his daughter was hurting, and there was nothing more Kokichi wanted than to take her into his arms and give her all of his love, trying to soothe whatever was bothering her.

But he couldn’t get up. He literally, physically couldn’t get up.

It felt like there were hundred-pound weights pressing down all over his body, crushing him to the floor, and it had been like that since the instant everything had just...shut down. Kokichi was...vaguely aware that he’d done it to himself but...he didn’t want to! He didn’t mean to!

This hurt so much…

...Kokichi had never left suicide notes. His despair has been slow and crawling, and the act of writing something out was always more than he could manage. But this time…

A sheet of paper appeared on the bed, wrinkled in small areas like it had caught little droplets of water. And...subtly...the bedroom started to get a little...er, melty.

I hurt Kaito with my powers.

Shuichi’s eyes darted around the room as Temp gazed at the walls, Alter Ego letting out an alarmed meow as they darted up Temp’s side, avoiding how the floor became soft and mushy beneath their paws. “Wet? What is everything always wet?” Alter Ego lamented, ears twitching and fur going up as the ceiling dribbled lightly onto them.

“Water is very symbolic,” Temp mused, brow furrowed as the decaying state of the room… “Shoot. The construct. Where is it?”

“Which… oh.” Alter Ego also looked around in alarm, “I’ll find him.” He promised, little rain boots appearing around Alter Ego’s feet and wearing a little golden raincoat as he leapt down, starting to dart two and from the furniture. If Chibi Kaito got caught up in this, it could do real damage to the little figment. It was astonishing the construct had survived Kokichi’s serious heart attack without needing to be reconstructed, where the prince had lost most of everything for those few weeks.

Shuichi, in turn, was somehow more composed than his two counterparts, for being the least familiar with this type of situation. It was easier, when it was just… another crime scene. Another place to investigate. With melting walls that might be a metaphor for his partner losing his mind… or something.

Shuichi picked up the paper, clearly written in Kokichi’s handwriting, though the ink was a dark purple color. “I hurt Kaito with my powers…” Shuichi frowned, looking down at his shoes, which were starting to puddle, the ceiling falling like rain around them. “...when?”

Wait.

Was this literally about Shuichi accusing Kokichi of gaslighting again?

Shit. Shuichi hadn’t meant… all of this. He hadn’t…

“Temp? You said all of this place is a metaphor?” Shuichi asked, “But, if it looks like a room in the real world, would it… I don’t know. Follow the same laws? Would doors lead the same places?”

“Depends on the person and the metaphor, but for Kokichi? Traditionally, yes. He treats this room as if its a pure reflection of his real one.” Temp said, trying to search Kokichi’s mind but… not able to find him… Kokichi was everywhere, and thus, nowhere. Where was he…

“Okay.” Shuichi sighed, having heard the stories Kaito told him a dozen times now. From Kaito, from Kokichi, in therapy… if this room was ‘literal’?

Shuichi headed to the closet, folding the paper into one hand, and softly, knocking on the door. “...Kokichi?” Shuichi called out, “May I come in?”

Kokichi...didn’t really notice that there were people in his mind, really. Of course he knew, and he had responded to feeling Alter Ego’s intent, but...it was like everything was far, far away. Like nothing could really...touch him.

But he could, faintly, hear Shuuichi’s voice. Sweet, smart Shuuichi who was really figuring everything out, huh?

...who loved Kaito too, and wouldn’t stand for Kokichi hurting him. But...if Kokichi didn’t even know he was doing it…

...he couldn’t raise his arm, let alone open the door. His ribs still felt crushed under the same weight that was over his whole body, surrounding him by this awful drowning feeling that he couldn’t breathe through.

...he wanted to let Shuuichi in. To help. But he couldn’t do anything.

Shuichi frowned.

“He might not be in there.” Temp said, “The mind can be vast. He could be hiding anywhere in here. He might have moved by the time we walked in.”

… Shuichi looked around briefly, before placing his hand against the door. “This wood is the only thing here not melting.” Shuichi said. “The door to the closet is the only solid thing. He’s in here. He just…” at this, Shuichi looked a little… timid. Uncertain. He leaned against the door and said softly, “Please, Kokichi, you know I’m bad at this… I want to help you, but you have to let me in first… Kokichi?”

( Ò ‸ Ó)

Yeah, no.

Chibi Kaito had been pulled from the floor by Alter Ego, who had found him half melted into the wood at the corner of the bed. Being pulled up as the cat bit at the back of his clothes, Chibi Kaito had, momentarily, been THRILLED to see Big Shuichi! Big Shuichi! Actual Big Shuichi! Hi!!

But Big Shuichi wasn’t paying attention to the chibis ecstatic waving, instead trying to gently coax his way into Kokichi’s (literal) meltdown. Which… no. That didn’t work on his guys. If Chibi Kaito knew ONE thing from his big counterparts example, is that when they got like this, asking ‘please’ and waiting didn’t accomplish much.

So, Chibi Kaito wiggled in Alter Ego’s mouth, managed to flip himself up onto the cats neck, and ignoring the cats outraged yowl, kicked at his neck, pushing Alter Ego forward. Then, using his privileges as a construct-- but also because everything was a god damn metaphor-- he ‘grabbed’ the key that was always invisiblely hanging around Alter Ego’s neck, brandishing it like a sword, and… well, the closet didn’t actually have a lock on it! So Chibi Kaito just literally crashed himself and Alter Ego into the door, hitting it with the key.

Shuichi, in turn, just watched a tiny Kaito brandishing a key on a golden talking cat wearing a raincoat just fucking headbutt the door, which shattered on impact, collapsing into an immediate puddle on the ground while the cat yowled in outrage at this even further worsening development.

...huh.

Shuichi didn’t have time to really unpack all that, because as he peered into the closet, he noticed with some alarm Kokichi kneeling in the closet, looking pained, hands over his ears. Shuichi put his hand over his heart, clutching the cloth in alarm, as he whispered, “Oh… Kokichi…”

He wanted to. But Kokichi couldn’t move an inch, was struggling just to breathe, the binds of terms like “monster” and “abuser” twirling around similar ones like “horrible father that makes his daughter frightened” and “too weak to cope with reality” squeezing him tighter and tighter, hardening like concrete around him. Insane, living in his own world, hurting everyone around him, granted great, amazing power, did wonderful things with it, and yet couldn’t manage his own life.

He couldn’t do anything, but...it wasn’t just up to him. He had help. He wasn’t alone.

There was a pulse of power as the door shattered, but like someone dropping a load of dishes and quickly trying to catch them, there was a sort of...catch. The pulse not quite exploding all the way out. But...color and warmth returned to the room…

As did everything going dark, the room not melted, but looking like...well, there had been an explosion. Things tipped over and cracked and broken, the walls slashed and almost looking like they had been splashed with black paint, sloppily spelling out all the horrible things Kokichi felt and thought about himself.

And...faintly. There was a gasping, shuddering sob.

Shuichi took a step forward, before glancing over his shoulder. His eyes grazing quickly over the damage, the words. The sheer toll Kokichi’s mind was having on him.

...he sighed, turning away from them. Saying softly as he moved into the closet, settling down onto his knees next to Kokichi and, carefully, tucking some of his hair behind his ear, “Oh, Kokichi… your brain is being unkind to you…”

Shuichi, first, put down the letter he had found, tossing it onto the floor with little consideration towards it. Then, lightly, with the very tips of his fingers, he combed his hands through Kokichi’s hair, eyes and face soft. Understanding, as he smiled slightly, saying in a soft, comforting voice, “We say such terrible things to ourselves, don’t we? Kokichi… abuser, monster… what terrible words… what ugly little lies your brain is telling you...”

“I’m here to listen, if you want to talk about it, Kokichi.” Shuichi said softly, “I’ll understand… you know I will. You’re not in this alone… I’m here…”

Shuuichi’s fingers almost felt electric, but in the best way, sending shocks through Kokichi’s body that gave him something else to focus on. Something to hold onto other than the unforgiving squeeze around him.

He knew that. He knew some of these feelings were irrational. Not even just the ones coming from his waking self. But knowing they weren’t true wasn’t helping right now. Not with the real problems happening. Not with the pain of months and months hitting him all at once. It was like what he’d realized with Kaito just earlier, but with himself all at once. He had both had months, and had moments.

Kokichi let out a little choked sound, trying to breathe, trying to speak. There was the slightest twitch in his body, trying to get closer to Shuuichi, to let himself fall into his boyfriend’s comfort.

“H...hhh...hurts…”

Shuichi felt his chest tighten with concern, sad and alarmed by Kokich’s obvious distress. There was a brief, selfish moment where he wished, genuinely, that Kaito or even Maki was here, the cat having taken the little version of their partner away to allow Shuichi to handle this. They were so much better at things like this then he was…

But it was just Shuichi, and Kokichi needed him.

Shuichi scooted in, putting his arms around Kokichi and now holding him, running the tips of his fingers along his back as he laid Kokichi’s head on his shoulders. Saying softly, “I’m sorry. I’m here…”

Shuichi glanced over his shoulder again. Taking in the words splattered onto the walls, and said softly, “You’re a wonderful father. If… if Miyako really is… like this?” Shuichi said, looking around at the strange place he was in. Kokichi’s actual mind, apparently, “Then Miyako is the luckiest little girl in the world, to have a father like you. You’re going to teach her so much. With this, with life in general… she couldn’t have a greater teacher in life. She’s so lucky… she needs you so much. And you’re everything she could have possibly asked for.”

“And you’re not insane.” Shuichi said, placing a small kiss against the side of Kokichi’s head, “And not unable to cope with reality. You helped us so much, when we couldn’t stop seeing Luminary in everything here… we counted on you, Kokichi, and you held out for us. Even when it was incredibly difficult. We needed you, and you didn’t let us down…”

Shuichi glanced at the letter, and rubbing Kokichi’s back, he said softly, “You know… I get a little jealous, sometimes, how much Kaito loves you. I’ve never seen him so smitten… it must be intimidating. To be looked at like you're so much larger than life. When he looked at me like that, I never could bring myself to believe it. He thinks I’m so smart. He thinks Maki is so tough. I think his expectations of us could be a bit of a burden, sometimes, it was so hard to live up to… I can’t imagine the pressure on you. He looks at you like you're perfect. He’s so in love with you… you mean so much to him. You mean so much to me too. Losing you, the good, the bad… it’d be devastating. You mean so much to us… the good and the bad… all of it… we love you so much…”

Kokichi knew, but...he needed to hear it. Needed to hear someone outside his head--heh--tell him that it was true, that he wasn’t just making it up. To hear the person that would keep him honest...well, keep him honest.

Shuuichi’s kisses felt like sunbursts of warmth, dyes cascading into water and mixing in…

Kaito thought the world of him, he knew. Even if Kokichi tried to insist on his humanity, he knew that Kaito would always put him a little higher. Even when it wasn’t Kokichi’s choice to be human, when he made awful, selfish decisions and mistakes, Kaito still…

And Kokichi had even more of an upper hand now. Mistakes that could hurt so much more. Not even letting Kaito have his mind as a safe place.

Kokichi coughed roughly, taking in a ragged breath as tears started to pour down his face, though...the paint on the walls started to disappear. “She’s so scared… I’ve scared her… I-I know I can’t do this, but if I’m scared it’s going to scare her so badly too…”

“I love you...I love you so much and...and I don’t want to hurt you...any of you. I know I can help, but I can’t control it, and...and my mistakes can hurt so bad…”

There was a brief moment, where Shuichi had to make a very serious decision.

In truth, he deserved more time to think this over than he had. It wasn’t an idle choice he was making, there was serious consequences to it. Even as the thought flashed through his mind, Shuichi knew he deserved more time. That this was unfair.

… but, life was unfair sometimes. Shuichi knew that. And now that the thought was in his head, considering Kokichi’s state? Shuichi couldn’t ignore it. It had to be addressed.

“...controlling it doesn’t mean ignoring it.” He said softly. “This is just who you are. The good and the bad. The ways it can help and the ways it can hurt. This is just the reality we’re working with now, Kokichi. And like all of our communication practices, it’s not up to you alone to do it ‘right’...”

Shuichi, again, wished Kaito was here… Maki… they were so much better at these ideas. At conveying their expectations, their devotion. At just… feeling. Violently, openly, loudly and full of heat. Shuichi’s cool, chilled love felt so inadequate in comparison.

But it was what he had to work with, so placing another soft kiss against Kokichi’s head, he pulled back a little. Pushing against Kokichi’s shoulders a little, giving him a soft, fond look. “...Kokichi. It’s incredible, how much you can see.”

And then, gently, he put his hands over Kokichi’s eyes.

As he put Kokichi in darkness, he said softly, “It’s amazing. It’s… I’m so jealous of it. Of what you can do. You can see us. A deep, inner part of us. You can see our little mental shifts, our hurts, our joys. You have something so much more than words, and body language, and all the thousand little signs we give each other, trying to be understood. You can see us… and now that I know that?”

“How terrible… how awful, it would be, if you blinded yourself, just to avoid all the amazing things you can see.” Shuichi said softly, leaning in to place a soft kiss against Kokichi’s forehead, still covering his eyes, as he said, “That would be heartbreaking… what an amazing thing you can do…”

And Shuichi lifted his hand, tears in his eyes, a smile on his face as he looked at Kokichi with love in his face, every message of how he was feeling written plainly in his expression as he said, “Kokichi… you can see us. That’s a gift.”

It was communication...but Kokichi hadn’t been able to tell any of them. He hadn’t been able to tell himself. But he couldn’t control it. So the bits that bled through were non-consensual and...let to Kokichi knowing things he shouldn’t. Acting on things that people weren’t prepared for.

...but you couldn’t always live in your past mistakes.

He could tell them now. Shuuichi knew now. They could work things out together now.

Kokichi’s hands twitched, curling in his hair as he shuddered, body curling in towards Shuuichi as he sobbed. Warm light starting to light up the closet as the rest of their room lit up again.

“...I can do really great things,” he whimpered. “I don’t want to hide. I want to tell you guys.”

“Well… Maki and I already know, by this point, so it’s kinda out of your hands in that regard.” Shuichi admitted, smiling warmly as Kokichi sobbed into his shoulder, still just holding him, looking around at the light. If everything was a metaphor, then this was probably a good sign… “Is this how you see the world, Kokichi? I really meant it… I’m jealous. How incredible.”

“...” and, just like what happened the last time Shuichi had realized Kokichi and himself were more on the same page than he thought, he said, “I’ve actually been aware of magic for some time now. Nadya told me. She asked me to keep it to myself, but, well… seems a little ridiculous, to try to hide it now.”

Shuichi laughed lightly, resting his head against Kokichi as he said, “What an interesting world we live in. There’s so much for us to learn, Kokichi… that’s very exciting.”

That made things easier...right. If Shuuichi had gone to see Temp, and was here now...then it wasn’t just a figment. This really was Shuuichi, and he really did know. That… They did need to have a proper conversation about it, but not having to do the initial one was...a big load off his shoulders.

“This is, this is more just my own space… Everyone has their own. I…” Kokichi’s throat cut off in a choke, still too overwhelmed to really have a conversation explaining all the things he’d learned about being an Empath just yet. Too overwhelmed to be that surprised about Nadya either, though it was sure to hit him hard later.

Instead, Kokichi just cried against his boyfriend, the tension slowly leaking from his body, allowing him movement. “M-my dad knows too, sorta. He knows that Miya’s like me, and he’s, he’s prepared to help.”

“I h-have so much to tell you,” Kokichi sobbed out in a laugh. “So much…”

“... when you’re ready too?” Shuichi said softly, “I can’t wait to hear all about it.”

Shuichi had just remembered that Kokichi, out in the world… didn’t quite understand what was happening. Shuichi was still trying to grasp everything that was happening, but he had managed to work that out by this point. Kokichi wasn’t really aware of what he was doing in the real world. He wouldn’t, at least when they were awake, remember this conversation.

“...how lonely.” Shuichi sighed, “How have you put up with this by yourself for so long? I already miss you, and we haven't even woken up yet. You won’t remember this… right?”

“I-I haven’t been alone,” Kokichi sniffled, now able to feel the presence of his friends. It wasn’t the same as what Shuuichi meant, he knew, but...Temp and Alter Ego’s friendships had been invaluable. And the support from his father, easing things along...even people like Mikado, learning more about the world of Empaths. He wasn’t alone...but it was going to be much easier with his partners (and Maki) on board.

Letting out a shuttering sigh, Kokichi nuzzled against Shuuichi’s body. “...probably not. I’m remembering more, but...it’s not there yet.” He scoffed quietly. “...just enough to think I’m going nuts.”

“Well, you do always assume you’re going nuts anyway, so it’s not too outlandish.” Shuichi teased, before humming to himself. “So… Ikou knows. Temp knows. Maki knows… probably best to wait until you can tell Kaito yourself. It can wait. We can handle the little drawbacks until then.”

“But try to hurry. It’s so exciting, and I already know I’m going to end up doing so much reading and research on this, and you know Maki’s just going to stare blankly at me and only pretend to listen when I discuss my findings with her. I need you to remember so we can get excited over it together.” Shuichi smiled, looking genuinely excited. “No pressure… but some pressure.”

Letting out a broken laugh, Kokichi pressed against Shuuichi more. “I’m trying… I have a feeling you’re gonna get ideas for all sorts of experiments. I can’t wait…”

Temp and Alter Ego waited out in the room, Alter Ego watching Chibi Kaito peek into the closet, the small creature clearly wanting to run in and be a part of of this, his whole body wiggling with desire, but… holding back. Letting the two Bigs have their moment, figure themselves out.

The room was solid again. Bright and warm and lit. The crisis, as it was, averted.

“... we should put him back before they wake up.” Alter Ego said gently. “If Shuichi’s woken up while still in another mind, it’s going to be extremely tough on him, his return.”

“I know. I just wanted to give them a moment.” Temp said, looking to the closet. “I wanted to wait until I was certain he could handle it, but… this feels like a win, all said and done. Perhaps it was best that this happened during a crisis. Shuichi seems like the type to handle himself better in a crisis than just… a conversation over tea.”

“Though, Maki knows now too, and I don’t know if that’s a good thing or a little terrifying.” Temp admitted, giving Alter Ego a dry look, “The dragon comes a little closer.”

“Maki seemed confident the dragons personality wouldn’t overtake her.” Alter Ego said, “And Maki does not seem the type to harm Kokichi’s allies without reason. It… will be okay. I believe that.”

“I’ll live vicariously through your confidence then.” Temp sighed, heading to the closet. “Alright… time for everyone to go home…”

Shuichi opened his eyes.

It felt like a dream…

There was a soft wail from the ground, Kokichi having rolled off the couch in his sleep.

Everything hurt… His head was killing him.

Kokichi pushed himself up from the ground, tears streaming from his face as a small trickle of blood leaked from his nose. “Miya… Oh my god… Shuu-chan, I… She wouldn’t stop crying and… A-are you okay? Can we go see her? Fuck, I must’ve scared the shit out of Kai-chan…”

Shuichi looked over at Kokichi, a little alarmed, a little startled… before smiling. Saying unconsciously, “Oh… you’re back.”

And he was bleeding. Hm.

Sitting up, Shuichi reached out to Kokichi, running his hand through his hair and tucking it behind his ear as he said, “It’s okay. Everything’s okay. But, before you run off to see Miyako, hold on. You hurt yourself falling off the couch. Just hold on and let me grab you a hand towel real quick.”

Kokichi...he knew Shuuichi saying that made sense, but...he couldn’t quite...understand what being ‘back’ meant.

But that was alright. Things were alright.

Sniffling, Kokichi scrubbed at his eyes but had just enough presence of mind to not scrub at his nose too, his shoulders shaking a little. He felt...overwhelmed, terribly so, but...also like it was okay. Things would be okay now.

Kokichi hugged himself, trying to take deep, slow breaths, calming himself down.

Shuichi was a little slow, but not for lack of trying. He really had overdone it that day, and surprisingly enough, his ‘nap’ hadn’t really felt like it had done anything for him, physically. In fact, he felt more worn down now, than he had going to sleep. Maybe a side effect of what he had been doing?

But he looked for a hand towel in his desk and found a packet of tissues he had entirely forgotten existed, asking Kokichi to sit on the couch for a moment as Shuichi sat beside him, taking a few napkins and placing them against his nose as he said, “Hold this, please, Kokichi, and tilt your head forward.” Before wiping off the blood on his chin and check, using fresh napkins to clean his tears, “There we go… that wasn’t so hard. If your nosebleed doesn’t stop in five minutes, I think it would be wise to stop by the healers and let them have a look at you. Just in case.”

“Everything is okay though. Today was challenging, huh?” Shuichi said softly. “You’ve been through a lot.”

Kokichi closed his eyes and tipped his head forward as asked, just trying to breathe through it all. Nosebleed, huh...great. Kokichi nodded slowly, not shaking Shuuichi’s touch away. “Okay… Okay...poor Miya-Miya...it’s been a miserable day for her… I know between Kai-chan, Maki-chan, and Ikuo they probably have it on lock, but I still feel bad not being there…”

“...I’m so tired…” Kokichi whispered, his shoulders slumping. “...I was trying so hard to hold things together and help but...I don’t know. It was like my head was full of cotton… Today sucks…”

He leaned forward, resting his head on Shuuichi’s shoulder, enjoying the warmth of his boyfriend. “...how are you feeling? Did that nap help? If we go to medical, you should say something too.”

It was such a similar sentiment to what he had been saying before, but there was a bounce to Kokichi’s words now, an underlying concern and love, like in the spaces between words he was singing out how much he adored Shuuichi and wanted to prevent anything uncomfortable from ever happening to him. There was so much love to Kokichi’s words.

“I may need more rest later.” Shuichi admitted, relaxing as Kokichi just… well, sounded like himself, really. A little anxious, a little earnest, and caring with his whole heart. Shuichi not a chore, but something Kokichi valued.

Back to normal.

“And I think you did a good job holding it together, really. I’m the one who pulled you away. Thank you for helping me, Kokichi, I was a little overwhelmed with everything. I really needed your help. Thank you.” Shuichi said softly, taking some extra napkins and saying, “Here, let’s trade out… okay. You look exhausted.” Shuichi said, shaking his head, “What a tough day on all of us. Let’s ask Maki or Ikou to watch Miya for a few hours, we all need another nap.”

It took another few minutes, but as Shuichi traded out napkins again, the next set came out basically clean, just wiping away some of the leftover stains, Kokich’s nose closing up. Cleaning his face again, Shuichi gave him a small kiss, at the corner of his lips, before saying, “You seem okay. Let’s head back. Go check on Kaito and Miyako.”

It was slow moving, but when they got back…

Miyako was quietly eating in Ikou’s arms, blinking sleepily but otherwise looking entirely calm, while Maki sat and chatted with him, both on the window seat. Leaning against the wall, a burping cloth still on his shoulder, his head laying against Maki’s leg, Kaito was entirely passed out on the floor, the unusual position causing him to snore slightly. Maki idly petting his hair as she looked up at the opening door.

She gave Shuichi a hard look. Shuichi smiled at her tiredly, placing a hand on Kokichi’s shoulder and hugging him to himself, trying to signal to Maki everything was okay, as he said, “Miyako looks clamer. Thank you both. We’re sorry we weren’t here, I had to pull Kokichi away.”

...some part of him felt like he’d entirely failed, but...he didn’t have time to mope around. He just had to be better for his family now. Though he really could go for a nap now… What even time was it? He’d basically been useless during his morning shift, only getting Miya to eat once…

Kokichi sighed.

Back to it.

Kokichi gave a little sigh of relief, his eyes immediately zeroing in on Miyako and, upon seeing her calm and eating...it was okay. Everything was okay. Seeing the fatigue on Maki and Kaito’s faces--though Kaito was already passed the fuck out…

“Thanks,” he softly echoed. “What ended up doin’ the trick? We tried spinning and singing and all sorts of stuff.”

Ikuo looked up, something critical in his eyes for a moment before he relaxed, still just sending pleasant vibes to Miyako in his arms. “Maki here managed ta surprise ‘er, an’ it was enough ta stall so that stuff could work. Jus’ needed ta all calm down a bit.”

Kokichi nodded, looking at his daughter with sympathy and love. “I’m glad she’s alright… Thank you two, really.”

“It’s fine. If it wasn’t, all those promises we made to you before she was born would have been a lot of hot air.” Maki said, waving her hand dismissively, looking at Shuichi again… she’d ask later. “Kaito’s actually only been out for a few minutes here. He was talking to us and just sorta drifted off. If he’s meant to be on shift, I can go get coffee, or…”

“...actually, why don’t we let Kaito and Kokichi rest. Maki, you and I can watch over Miyako. It should be a little easier on us, I can’t imagine she’ll want to be awake once she’s full.” Shuichi smiled, shuffling over to the window seat and, hesitating a moment… “Can I feed her, Ikou? If there’s anything left, I mean? I haven’t had too many opportunities to hold her myself…”

Kokichi gave Shuuichi a worried look, but...while his boyfriend’s fatigue was genuine, he also got the impression that...hm. Well, context clues said he wanted to talk to Maki alone.

...he shouldn’t mind read… That’s how the whole morning got fucked up. But Shuuichi did seem sure of himself.

Glancing between them, Kokichi gave his friends a worried look. “...if you’re alright with that? Technically, I’m supposed to be back on baby duty at six, but...if you guys need anything at all, wake me up, okay?”

Ikuo huffed. “Jus’ rest, bun.” Turning to Shuuichi, Ikuo gave him a gentler look and nodded, moving his body fluidly to give Shuuichi enough room to sit comfortably on the window seat and transfer Miya over to him. “There’s a bit--she’ll enjoy bein’ with one ‘a her pops--she’ll be gettin’ more familiar with folks as time goes on, but she probably recognizes you three th’ most.”

Watching fondly, Kokichi crawled up into bed, just watching Shuuichi hold Miya before he sighed, grasping a pillow against his chest and letting himself start to drift.

Maki watched as Shuichi carefully held Miyako, looking a little dazed as he watched her feed from the bottle-- {Food smell warmth. Miyako relaxed. Yeah, she knew this person.}-- before looking to Kaito, getting up as he jerked awake after starting to fall, her leg not leveraging him anymore. “F-urgha?”

“Kokichi’s back. He’s going to bed. I’m doing babysitting duties.” Maki explained, offering Kaito a hand up and pulling him to his feet as Kaito stumbled up, clearly barely awake as she led him back to the bed.

Kaito glanced over his shoulder, fuzzy eyed and blurry, “M-ergh? ‘Iya?”

“It’s fine. Just get some rest.” Maki said, pulling the spit-up cloth off his shoulder and pushing him into bed.

Kaito fell onto the bed with an oof, still not quite awake or aware of what was going on, but… Maki sounded confident, so that usually worked out. Oh, and Kokichi was here, on the bed, so… the next step was usually hold Kokichi. Okay.

Kaito murmured something indistinguishable before putting his arms around Kokichi, burying his face in the pillow, another small, nonsense murmur… before he was totally out again. Maki giving them both a once over before returning to Shuichi and Ikou.

Kokichi hummed a few times as he registered Kaito getting up before snuggling against him as soon as he felt his warmth. Naps with both his partners...if everything else hadn’t gone to shit, he would’ve felt pretty lucky. Hopefully the day would get better when he woke back up…

It was quiet for a little bit, but when Kokichi’s snuffles started to sound out, Ikuo spoke up, confident soft voices wouldn’t be keeping his son up. “...you got ‘im back to ‘imself, then? Good. Can’t say I’ve ever quite seen it like that…”

“So what happened?” Maki asked, raising a sharp eyebrow, “You… actually just went to sleep?”

Shuichi took a breath, and explained everything that happened. Temp appearing in his own mind, going to Kokchi’s, the dysfunctional circus, the golden cat, tiny Kaito-- “What?” Maki said dryly, “Seriously?”-- and the words on the wall, Kokichi’s despair and talking it out with him.

“I got the impression Kokichi’s been struggling with this for awhile and… my calling him out on reading Kaito’s mind earlier today was the tipping point.” Shuichi explained, giving Ikou a mildly apologetic look as he burped Miyako, starting to wrap her up. “When I had accused him of ‘mind reading’, I sort of thought Kokichi had just gotten lucky on some guesses, and was worried about him letting Kaito believe he had actually said those thoughts aloud. I hadn’t meant… literal mind reading.”

“And yet, here we are.” Maki said, crossing her arms, “...your boyfriend is an actual mind reader. How on earth are you ever keeping a secret ever again?”

“I’ll have to think of something, I guess.” Shuichi shrugged. The idea of just not keeping secrets not occurring to him.

Ikuo crossed his arms, leaning back a little from his new position on the ground, taking it all in. So that was what the whole Empath thing was like, eh? And considering Shuuichi was speaking plainly in front of him, then either that fella Temp or Kokichi himself had told Shuuichi that Ikuo was in the know.

Slowly, everyone was getting on the same page.

Though...something Shuuichi said struck him, and Ikuo lowered his hat. “...’sppose more than jus’ yer therapist’s stance on mind readin’ ‘ll have ta be reevaluated. ‘Ve been tryin’ ta smooth thing over wi’ ‘Kich as ‘e’s startin’ ta remember things. But it hasn’t been enough, ‘pparently.”

Ikuo raised his head to look at the young adults, eyes gleaming in the shadow of his hat’s brim. “...Temp told ya ‘bout why this is all secret in the first place, yeah? Why I didn’ jus’ tell ‘Kich this from th’ start.”

Ikuo mostly operated on the fact that most magic was just none of his business. Folks were folks, living their lives like the rest of ‘em, and if they wanted to share things with ya, it was an honor to be trusted. But not even being aware of how many situations were going on in that world, Ikuo knew well enough that humans could be cruel enough too that word getting out about someone like Kokichi and Miyako would be dangerous. To their whole family.

“No, not really. Honestly, we received all of this information in a bit of a… hurry.” Shuichi said, looking over to Maki, who shrugged, “And Temp had to spend some time just proving to us he wasn’t telling stories. If I wasn’t already aware magic existed, I think I might be more alarmed right now, but… it almost feels like a matter of course.”

Shuichi still didn’t know that Temp and Kokchi and Alter Ego had all told him this once before. But there was always a part of you that remembered. In at least a small way, Shuichi had had time to get used to this already.

“I know in Luminary, someone would accuse them of being demons.” Maki said, brow furrowing, “But here, people don’t really believe in demons. Right?”

“Even if they weren’t demons, people get… worried and scared and mean when they think their secrets will be exposed.” Shuichi said grimly, a lifetime of watching his back proving that to him, “Dicea might be easier on it, since you all believe so strongly in no secrets, but… well, that would make anyone who has successfully kept any even more desperate.”

Ikuo relaxed a little--even if they didn’t know exactly, they knew the value in keeping it a secret. Really, out of everyone, the Luminaries were probably the best suited to keeping a secret without knowing the reasons.

“Things’re easier here,” Ikuo nodded, agreeing congenially. “Acceptin’ differences is jus’ how Dicea’s structured these days. But there are always folks just a li’l too scared or a li’l too ambitious no matter where ya are, and ‘cause ‘a those folks, it’s dangerous ta talk big ‘bout ‘Kich an’ Miya. Ain’t jus’ ‘bout secrets.”

It was about people wanting their power for themselves. Or possible outcomes of Flora being aware of Miyako.

Again, Ikuo looked up curiously at Shuuichi. “...if what happened today is ‘cause ya got close ta tellin’ him? Then ‘e’s jus’ personally not ready ta hear it either.” Ikuo tilted his head, something fond and a little exasperated. “Ya know Bunny. Always tryin’ ta take responsibility of th’ world. Openin’ up those possibilities is prolly somethin’ he’s been workin’ on in th’ backend.”

“Well, he needs to figure it out. Today was ridiculous.” Maki said, not batting an eye if it was cruel. “I thought it was my technique earlier, but looking back at it, Miyako stopped crying when Kokichi left. I don’t know what he was doing, but that’s something he needs to get control of, if it’s going to affect her like that.”

“I don’t… think that’s likely to happen again.” Shuichi said, giving Miyako a soft look as he went to put her in her crib, laying her down and watching her sleep a bit, “Like I said, Kokichi was sort of… hiding himself away? And considering he’s had these powers the whole time we’ve known him, I’ve never seen him act like that before, so… this feels unique. I don’t think Kokichi’s powers will hurt Miyako.”

Shuichi didn’t know that Kokichi had been like this once before. That Kaito had seen roughly the same thing, for a little while, at the Memorial Garden. If Kaito had been less distracted, he might have been more actively alarmed by it, but he just hadn’t had time.

Maki huffed, looking distinctly unimpressed, “Magic, telepaths, empaths, whatever you want to call it… it’s just like his responsibilities as the heir-apparent. He has powers and abilities and privileges others will only ever get to dream of. He needs to accept it and be responsible for it.”

“He’s trying. I can’t really explain how difficult it looked in there, Maki. It was overwhelming.” Shuichi said softly, “He’s trying, I know he is.”

Ikuo nodded a bit, recalling the eerie emptiness in Kokichi, the thing that made him ask his son to wait away from his daughter. “It is li’drally what I said ‘bout her feelin’ ya before, Maki. Miya’s jus’ like him, so she knows what yer feelin’. She jus’ can’t process any of it righ’ now. If he was...hidin’? That was prolly real scary fer her ta feel. But this is the only time I’ve ever seen ‘im like that.”

Sighing, Ikuo knew this just was how Maki was, but he couldn’t help feeling protective of Kokichi. “Shoot, considerin’ he’s been settin’ up meetin’s an’ events like what’cha had with Temp fer months, he’s doin’ more ‘bout it an’ bein’ as responsible as he can only doin’ work while he’s asleep.” Ikuo sighed again.

“He’s been like this since ‘e were a toddler. But ‘e only found out ‘bout half a year ago. Settin’ up all these plans an’ contingencies without bein’ able ta really talk ta folks in person is still a lotta work.”

“What sort of things was he able to do as a toddler?” Maki suddenly asked, looking to Ikou. She didn’t say it, but she knew what Kokichi was doing was hard. But Maki was a hard person with high expectations in people. Difficulty wasn’t the excuse: it was just the reality. And it had just occurred to her that another difficult thing was on the horizon, as she asked, “Did you notice Kokichi was an empath as a child because he started reading your thoughts?”

Shuichi frowned at that, “But… Empaths can actually do more than that. Temp literally brought me into Kokichi’s mind. That’s… a little more involved than mind-reading.” He said, pulling out his journal and pen, adding more notes to this predicament, “Though, maybe that’s the extent of what they’re capable of?”

“There’s more than I know,” Ikuo sighed, thinking about the very long days of Kokichi’s early childhood. “Couldn’ tell ya if ‘e was readin’ my mind, though ‘e prolly was attuned, but ‘e’d gimme suggestions ‘a what ‘e wanted. And if ‘e really wanted somethin’ I’d be blackin’ out fer a few before comin’ back ta Bunny diggin’ inta a sundae. Always knew ‘mmediately when ‘e was upset, an’ would find myself already on my way ta his room without much ‘valuation.”

“...animals were the worst,” Ikuo decided after a moment, still speaking casually about things beyond normal comprehension. “Bunny jus’ wanted ta be friends with ‘em all. Ain’t easy keepin’ ‘im happy an’ distracted ‘nuff that birds ain’t dive-bombin’ outta th’ sky.”

Maki and Shuichi both stared at Ikou like he had just grown a second head.

“...ugh.” Maki groaned, putting her head in her hands, “You have terrible taste in men, Shuichi.”

“Hey! You were trying to nab the tall one basically all of our childhoods! It’s not just me!”

“You had to have a baby with the one that makes body snatching babies.”

“Miyako and Kokichi are body snatchers… that’s a lot.” Shuichi admitted, adjusting his cap, that kinda being the bit of information that had finally just… kinda broke him. Wow. Wow. This was going to be a lot. “...well, I mean, at least we know she’ll grow out of body snatching?? Right??” Shuichi said, looking to Ikou somewhat desperately, “When did Kokichi grow out of that?”

Ikuo huffed something like a laugh at their lamenting. It was a lot, but that was why they were talking about it, and why he was there to help.

“Late two’s, though ya gotta remember ‘Kich weren’t doin’ much ‘a anythin’ fer his first year, so I dunno how long it takes ta start up. ‘S basically them jus’ bein’ too young ta know anythin’ but bein’ selfish. Kept findin’ myself knowin’ how he was feelin’ after that, but ain’t much of a problem in my book fer raisin’ a kid.”

After a moment, though, Ikuo shrugged. “...can’t tell ya much ‘bout her bein’ a Flora’ll change any ‘a that, but they ain’t much diff’rent ta begin with.”

Maki nodded, but it was Shuichi who caught that last word. “...Flora?” He asked, looking to Ikou, “Is that another word for this empath stuff?”

Ikuo raised an eyebrow, giving the two of them a long look. “...nah, it ain’t. Had a real rushed talk with Temp, din’cha? But I ain’t the best ta talk ‘bout it, so ya might wanna have another chat soon.”

Shuichi gave Ikou a slightly befuddled look at this, opening his mouth to ask for further clarification… but he stopped when Maki put a hand on his shoulder.

“Maybe let it go, for now. If he’s being dodgy about it, it’s probably a lot to explain, and, frankly,” Maki said, looking Shuichi up and down, concern in her eyes, “I’m waiting for your panic attack. Might as well not make it worse. We’ll grill him later when you’re ready.”

“I’m not going to have a panic attack.” Shuichi said, rolling his eyes at her a little, “I can take this without freaking out.”

“How do you feel about it now? Exactly?”

“...not much.” Shuichi admitted.

Maki nodded, “Please. Trust me. Give yourself some time to process the shock. If it ended up being something that couldn’t wait…” Maki’s intense, red gaze flicked to Ikou. “Then that’s something we’ll account for from then on.”

What she implied, but didn’t outright say-- because she felt like the implication was enough-- was that she trusted that Ikou was the type who would tell them immediately if there was a danger in not knowing right away. An offer of trust. Or, maybe, a test of it.

Ikuo sighed slightly but let the siblings talk for a moment. As helpful as it was to really talk about all this stuff, it was a lot to process. Kokichi was a prime example of that. While today had been something of an emergency, forcing Shuuichi and Maki into the deep end without checking the temperature, they did actually have the luxury of time. Sure, Miyako might start acting up with her powers, but there was nothing terribly dangerous about it. For as dangerous as...more or less, mind control was, an infants wants still weren’t dangerous.

Giving Maki a nod, Ikuo explained himself. “I ain’t dodgin’ ta be difficult. The truth of it is I don’t know much ‘bout it myself, so at best I’d be leavin’ ya with questions I can’t answer anyway. But I can tell ya it’s nothin’ dangerous, far as I’m ‘ware.”

He glanced over at the sleeping couple on the bed. “...honestly, if ya can get a chat with ‘Kich in his head again? He’ll prolly have answers ta all the questions ya have, since he’d’ve had ‘em too.”

Shuichi laughed lightly at that, “I guess I’d have to go begging Temp to help me reach out to him… oh. You know, I did wonder why Kokichi was so adamant that Temp would make a good parent for Addason.” Shuichi said, eyes lighting up with realization, “I wonder if Kokichi even realizes how well he knows Temp? They seemed like pretty casual acquaintances when all of that happened, but if Temp is also one of these empaths, they might be closer than… well, than anyone could have guessed, really. Enough to feel comfortable giving him a ringing endorsement for adopting.”

Briefly, an equation thundered through Shuichi’s mind.

[(Flora= plant-life) + poppy-based-pregnancy’PBP’] + Temp adopting 2nd PBP + Kaito Info + (Danganronpa-base + Confirmed Bio side effects) = a + (Magic exists + Danganronpa Texts) = (unknown, solve for a.)

… solving for ‘a’ being...

Actually.

Don’t think about it.

Shuichi’s stomach rolled nervously, and he said, “Actually… I think maybe I’ll wait for Kokichi’s answers when we’re all more rested. I think jumping through minds takes a lot out of you. Kokichi woke up with a bloody nose, and I feel like I haven't slept in days. Maki? Would you--”

“Go. Sleep. I’m here.” Maki said, settling down.

“Thanks… and thanks, Ikou, again for your help. I don’t think I’ve really gotten my head around how much help you’ve actually been today.” Shuichi said, getting up and, with only a small wince, bowing, “I know we have a hard time showing appreciation for help, but we do appreciate it.”

Kokichi certainly talked fondly about Temp, and...honestly, especially after the story Kokichi had told him about Temp joining him in the Memorial Garden and honoring Miyako, Ikuo thought they were pretty close. But Shuuichi was certainly right. Even if Kokichi didn’t remember all the parts when he was awake, those two had more to their relationship than met the eye.

Kokichi had a lot of people to support him, and Miya would too. They would have different things to navigate in life than others, but they would have the support to get through it.

Briefly, as Shuuichi mentioned his fatigue, Ikuo thought about mentioning the headaches and bouts of sickness he had a hunch were caused by Kokichi overdoing it with his abilities, but...well, it wasn’t immediately important to know, and Shuuichi was literally talking about being too tired to get into much more. It would be for the next conversation.

Nodding with a small smile, Ikuo got up as well. “Y’all show it in yer own ways, an’ I can still see it. I’m glad I can manage ta make things easier on ya.” Glancing to Maki, he tilted his head slightly. “...ya good? I was gon’ get m’project an’ come back if ya want th’ company.”

Maki thought about it for a moment. If the trio were too messed up from the days events to reliably do a watch tonight, then in theory, Maki should let Ikou do this shift and offer herself up to spend the night. Ikou could do it, but she wouldn’t ask the older man to. But… “You don’t have to stay, though I might ask you to, if you don’t mind, go check on Timothy. He’s likely back from the park with Hajime and he hasn’t checked in. He’s probably just fine, I just like to know where he is when evening gets here.”

“I’d just go myself but… I was serious about waiting for that panic attack. Shuichi is exceptional at keeping it together when things are happening, but the longer things are peaceful…” Maki shrugged. “Some things only hit you after everything is done. I just want to try to be around when it happens, if I can.”

“Ya got it. Might take care’ra few thin’s in the meantime, then. ‘Ll come back wi’ some food since I doubt Kaito an’ Kokichi have eaten anythin’.” Considering Miyako had been crying since before breakfast and it was now after lunch...yeah. Even if they woke up close to dinner, it’d probably do them good to have a little something immediately.

Ikuo looked over to where Shuuichi had crawled into bed by his partners, nodding after a moment. “...been a full day. I’ll give ya some time ta process too. But while ya have a bigger scope now, the worl’ is pre’ much th’ same. Same people ya know, an’ same folks that care ‘bout’cha. Take care, Maki.”

Giving the woman another nod, and giving Miya a fond look as he passed her crib, Ikuo quietly exited the room, making plans to take care of some of the “life” stuff his son’s family hadn’t been able to manage today.

Timothy had been quiet today.

Not, maybe, in an alarming way. Just enough for Cali to ask about it at one point, while the kids were playing in the park. Timothy, briefly, had looked like he was going to dodge the question, but… “I think I saw a friend of mine, yesterday.”

“Oh yeah? That’s cool!”

“Maybe. He might be a ghost.”

“...woah! Really??”

“Maybe. He’s supposed to be dead, I think. Dad prays for him sometimes. In a… collective way.”

“Wooooah! That’s so cool!”

“Yeah. But also, the last ghost I saw ended up being a weirdo who slashed me across the face.”

“The guy who gave you your badass scar?”

“Yeah.”

“Huh.”

“Mmhm.”

As Cali and Timothy waited for Kimiko to find them, her being It this game, Cali said, “So, you gonna go find him?”

“...yeah.” Timothy decided.

Which was what he was doing now. Sneaking out of his room in the middle of the night-- entirely unaware his father sometimes opened the door to hear him breathing-- and, a pocket full of salt, looking around for the ghost. His other pocket with his mothers throwing dagger, which, honestly, by this point was just his throwing dagger. Not entirely certain what he expected to do when he found his ghost, but knowing he hadn’t been prepared to handle it crying.

But that’s what Damien did, when Timothy finally found him, playing outside under the moonlight, wandering the gardens. The two saw each other, and Damien started to cry.

“Don’t tell.” Damien whimpered, sobbing into his sleeves, “We’re not supposed to be seen.”

Timothy frowned at that, heading over to him… before tossing his salt on the Healer. Damien’s crying quieting a little as the dark eyed boy gave Timothy a bewildered look.

“Wanted to make certain you weren’t a ghost.” Timothy explained, “You know everyone thinks you’re dead? That the Luminary Party died.”

Damien looked miserable at that, “...they’re right enough.”

“...the others?”

“Okay. But… nearly everyone else…”

“...” Timothy rubbed the back of his neck, scratching the skin there, before he went to sit by where Damien had collapsed in his sobbing. Drawing up his thin legs to his chest, trying to think of what was best to do… “Well.” Timothy said, crossing his arms, “What happened?”

“You… you won’t believe me. No one would believe us.”

“Try me. What happened to the adults?”

Damien’s face scrunched up. “...we did.”

Things didn’t immediately change. Kokichi again tried to apologize to Kaito about their argument, and while things, at least to him, didn’t seem totally resolved, it was okay enough to put behind them.

Days continued. Miya sometimes wailed in the middle of the night, but there wasn’t another multi-hour scream-fest, for which everyone was thankful. Slowly, some of Kokichi’s family came to visit and see the baby. Denji was already chattering about what kinds of colors and patterns would compliment Miya’s coloring, Lake just barely held back fat tears when Miyako grabbed her finger and didn’t let go, Kokichi’s sister talking in a thick voice about how much of a buff baby Miyako was.

Before they knew it, the first week of the rest of their lives had passed. At midnight, Kokichi kissed his hand and curled his fist to press to Miya’s head as he was putting her back down to sleep. “Happy summer, Miyako. There’s going to be plenty more sun for you to bask in coming up.”

He and Kaito traded off their duty, Kokichi gratefully snuggling in next to Shuuichi, wrapping his arms gently around his boyfriend, and falling asleep.

And knowing that he couldn’t put this off forever, even if he wished they could just talk when he was awake.

Kokichi was hesitant to just trapeze into his friends and family’s minds, knowing that even in their own minds, he had so much power over them. As an Empath, he was the only real conscious one there, and not even exploring and shaping their minds, just that fact of knowing what was going on was too much for Kokichi’s morals to feel okay about.

And that was how he’d felt until Temp had pulled the actual Shuuichi into his mind.

He’d talked to Temp and Alter Ego in the meantime, thanking them again for their help, talking a little more about their plans for Addason, but Kokichi had asked Temp about what he’d done. Giving a non-Empath a way to consent. And Kokichi certainly hadn’t had the practice, but...he could try. And it would be easier specifically not trying to hide from the conscious projection.

When Kokichi arrived, Shuuichi was rewatching a quiet, comfortable moment in his study, able to easily make the trek by himself again. Shuuichi had left by himself, so...Kokichi’s appearance should be clear enough.

Not having come in through the door, Kokichi leaned against it, knocking gently as he looked at his partner in fondness, focusing on the fact that this was Shuuichi’s surface thoughts, the ones he would notice and remember.

Shuichi had just headed to his office, maybe a little more than a half hour ago, and he was carefully reading over a book that was… he supposed technically research. It was hard to look at it that way, considering it was a book of myths and legends, but…

Shuichi shifted, startled, because he… wasn’t. Reading the book. He was watching himself read the book. Nini curled comfortably around his neck and arm, the sun coming in through the open window, a gentle breeze moving his curtains. He hadn’t realized he had been observing this memory in the third person until a sound had jolted him out of his dream-logic where he was both the memory of Shuichi and the surface thoughts, and now the memory continued playing out the scene, while Shuichi, as he knew himself to be, looked over at the of the sound.

“...” Shuichi gave Kokichi a confused look, looking around the room, at the memory-Shuichi at the desk, before finally confirming to himself what he knew by looking down at his own projection. Which looked different than what he looked like in real life. Thin arms, thin legs, thin hips… “You know. I was half convinced that maybe I had actually just dreamed all of it, and Temp was just an asshole playing a particularly cruel joke.” Shuichi admitted, smiling at Kokichi, “...though, I suppose I could just be dreaming now.” He mused, looking uncertain.

Kokichi grinned, coming forward to the now split projection. He had been warned about that, but...well, as much as this was him wanting to talk to Shuuichi, this was something of an exercise for himself too. Hopefully Kokichi wouldn’t come to rely on this method for having full conversations with his partners, but...in the meantime, it would be helpful to be able to do it reliably, and with at least one of them remembering in the morning.

“I mean, technically you are dreaming. That’s what’s going on right now,” Kokichi nodded to the Shuuichi at the desk...and kind of the whole room around them. “But the fact that I’m in your dream, and you’re aware of it is real. It’s hard to parse with all the metaphors, but my mentor once explained that the whole reason it’s dreams and metaphors is because it’s too hard to think about the actual physicality of it. I know it’s too complex for me, anyway.”

Kokichi stopped in front of Shuuichi, his smile softening as he reached out for his boyfriend’s hand. “...you know, the fact that you’re able to even consider it as reality is pretty amazing… One of the first things I ever learned was how non-Empaths aren’t really...conscious in their consciousness, I guess, and that can be pretty helpful if you’re trying to be subtle, but...it’s really hard to have a conversation like this with you-you, you know?”

Kokichi looked around, a hint of a disappointed flush on his cheeks. “...even now, I’m not sure if you’ll really remember this in the morning. Like...as more than just a weird turn in a dream. I’ve never tried to do this before.”

Shuichi took the hand, but sort of picked it up rather than held it, looking at Kokichi’s hand with a curiosity and inquisitiveness. It… felt real. He could feel skin and density and heat-- well, as much as Kokichi ever felt hot-- in the small, thin joints.

But, he frowned at the idea that he might not remember this, if Kokichi was ‘doing this wrong’. “You’re not ‘sure’ if this is the real me? I don’t understand what that means… are there fake me’s? Your cat… friend? Alter Ego. He made this comment of meeting me ‘again’. What does…”

Shuichi glanced over his shoulder, looking at the Shuichi at the desk. He looked real too… Shuichi glanced down at himself again. Suddenly entirely uncertain of his own… ‘actuality’. Which was a new feeling, to be sure. “...huh…”

Kokichi made a sort of grumbling sound, letting Shuuichi inspect his hand. “It’s not that any...of you is fake? Like, this all,” Kokichi gestured with his free hand to the entirety of the space around them, “is you. But...it’s like, you’re not consciously aware of your synapses firing, right? You just have thoughts. It’s all you, but there’s a physicality that happens that your body does without your input. But Empaths deal with that input, and we’re aware of the physicality.”

Peering closer at Shuuichi, Kokichi sighed and tipped his head on his shoulder. “This is all you, but...like, the body you’re talking to me with right now? It’s what we call ‘surface thoughts’ or a ‘surface-level projection’. It’s...your ego, I guess? It’s the closest I can get to talking to you while we’re both awake and talking in our own bodies--a-and it is just you, in that sense! But since we’re in your mind and you’re asleep...it’s a type of awareness, so...you might not remember this more than a dream when we wake up…”

He screwed up his face a little, having confused himself. “...this stuff is still kinda out of my grasp. Alter Ego is a lot better at understanding the physicality of everything…”

“Oh,” he perked, remembering to address Shuuichi’s other question. “...yeah. You two have technically met before. But...the version of you we talked to was...I refer to them as memories? Because...they basically are you and all your memories, but they don’t tap into your surface level thoughts, so you aren’t aware that you have people in your head chatting with you. And that was the you that made the deal with Temp for him to tell you about all this stuff after you had Miya.”

Shuichi nodded quietly, mind racing. Already a dozen little ideas racing for first place in his priorities, trying to really… comprehend that the physical stuff around them was him. What that actually meant, what the other Shuichi meant, what Kokichi’s physical-- was it?-- presence here meant. Could this room change? Kokichi had a circus in his mind--

“What?” Shuichi asked, giving Kokichi a bewildered look, “I made a deal with Temp?”

Kokichi nuzzled at Shuuichi’s shoulder before sighing, having opened his mouth then closed it when he realized what exactly the whole story was. “...for it to make sense, there’s a lot of stuff I have to tell you about. Some of it is...difficult.” Kokichi’s lips pursed together in anxiety. “Some of it...you might be mad at me for. And I understand that. But...will you hear me out? All of it?”

“...and can we sit down? It just...seems like a sitting down conversation.”

“...I mean, should we sit in this room with this version of me?” Shuichi asked, gesturing vaguely at his other self-- and suddenly explicitly aware that at some point in this room he was going to let out an embarrassingly loud fart and over his dead body was Kokichi going to be around when that happened-- and saying with some amount of urgency, “Can you take us somewhere else to talk? Or… do I have to do that? I don’t… really understand. I know this place is my mind, but I feel normal. I don’t feel like I have any control over any of this.”

Shuichi had heard Kokichi say that he might be angry about something Kokchi had done. But Shuichi had learned over the last year that Kokichi’s ideas of harming them, or him, were really hit or miss, on something Shuichi himself would find alarming. He’d reserve any anxiety about it until he found out what his small boyfriend was wringing his hands over. It honestly could be nothing.

Kokichi grinned slightly. “Really, the limit is your imagination. People have their own set of rules for themselves--I think I might’ve told you and Kai-chan about a dream I had a while ago? It had actually been the first time I met Alter Ego, and they were trying to help me realize I was an Empath. They had led me up an impossibly high building and were walking on the sky off the edge. I tried to follow but my mind doesn’t just accept being able to hang out in the air, you know? I fell immediately.”

“You can allow us to go somewhere else, but I’ll make it happen,” Kokichi giggled with a wink. “If you could at will go different places in your mind, I’d say you had some Empathic abilities too. So...think of a place you’d wanna chat.”

Kokichi led Shuuichi over to the door, waiting for his go-ahead, though he hummed softly. “...that’s kind of a big point. I happen to be a particularly strong Empath, but the ability is there to varying degrees in a lot of people. Apparently, the, like...social sense was named after the ability, since being attuned to how people around you feel can literally be a low power level of the ability.”

Shuichi allowed himself to be led, once again cursing his own lack of imagination. Where could he go… considering Kokichi was always going to be an empath, maybe it wouldn’t actually be all that outlandish in the future, but for now, this felt like a unique opportunity to Shuichi. His chance to go… well, anywhere, he guessed. Even to places that didn’t exist. So where…

“...I used to go to this little cafe back in Luminary. They had these little meat pies that were amazing, the crust was always this rich golden color, they minced meat and fruits together, and had these little herbs backed into the bread.” Shuichi mused, laughing at himself a little, “And their green tea and black coffee weren’t bad, in comparison to… well, all of green tea and black coffee. Could we…”

Shuichi reached out to the handle, trying to… he wasn’t sure. Visualize it? Will it into being? Just thinking about it hard, as he turned the handle…

He opened the door, and it was like his vision went fuzzy. Unable to directly look at the space behind it, Shuichi winced, closing the door and its incomprehensible void behind it. Sighing as he said, “Well, if I am one of those individuals, I’m not very good at it, am I.”

Oh, that sounded lovely… Kokichi had gotten to see Luminary in Kaito’s memories, and while he had been playing up his touristy hype, he had genuinely been in awe looking around. The chance to get to see one of Shuuichi’s favorite little places… One of the greatest things about being an Empath was the ability to share memories.

Laughing softly, Kokichi placatingly kissed Shuuichi’s temple as he winced back from the door. “It took me a long, long time to be able to do anything, but...honestly I think Shuu-chan is Shuu-chan. Lemme just…”

Kokichi took a deep breath and closed his eyes. Thinking of the fondness in Shuuichi’s voice and latching onto his descriptions… Shuuichi wasn’t an Empath so it wouldn’t be seamless. It would go against his inherent rules, even if he was accepting it. So...Kokichi would have to push, just a little…

Letting out his breath, Kokichi opened his eyes and immediately took another breath in, entranced by the odd, but delicious smells around them. “Oh… This is incredible…”

Shuichi genuinely hadn’t been expecting to feel anything, mostly having picked the cafe because it was the first place his unimaginative mind had latched onto as ‘maybe kind of cool’. Somewhere that might impress Kokichi, even though really it was just a small cafe near the business district.

But when the air turned dry and bright, a familiar heat already painting his neck and face, and there was that taste of dust and metal and steam… his breath caught. Looking around in almost pained bewilderment. His brain, briefly, struggling with the reality that… was he in Luminary? It tasted and felt and smelled like Luminary. It was so real… he had to be in Luminary. How had they--

Shuichi closed his eyes and lowered his hood. Trying to calm himself down. He had to remember that… this was still just a dream. They hadn’t… god, it felt like they had teleported. It all felt real. Every nerve was lit up in alarm, and… he hadn’t expected the weird twist in his feelings. The… the pull.

‘I’m home.’ He thought, and he hated that thought. He had already long dismissed Luminary as his home. But every nerve and sense in his body kept telling him that. ‘Look. We’re home. We’re back. Back where we belong.’

Shuichi trembled a little, “...give me a moment.” Shuichi finally said in a little breath, trying to soothe his confused brain, “One moment, please. This is all fake, yes? It’s still fake?”

Kokichi could feel the force of Shuuichi being overwhelmed, a sort of homesickness he really...had never felt from his partner before. But...he supposed this would be the sort of thing to do it.

Sighing softly, Kokichi put a gentle, light hand on Shuuichi’s back. Giving him space, but reminding him that Kokichi was there. “Are we physically in Luminary? No. We’re both in bed, in our room, sleeping while Kai-chan’s looking after Miya. But these memories are yours. This is a place you’ve been to before, so many times I don’t even know, and you’re visiting that memory.”

“So...you can be nostalgic, yeah? That’s kinda the biggest feeling associated with memories, I think.”

Shuichi nodded, honestly surprised at himself. He had known what they were going to do before they did it, but the sheer shock of it…

But, as he took in a few breaths, letting them out-- as always, more hoping it would help than feeling confident in it-- he noticed the sound of tapestry flapping, wind blowing in from the desert heat. He had always loved listening to that sound. When he had gotten his own room, he had marveled at leaving the window open and just listening to the sound of the flapping, shuffling fabric, all signs made of tapestry, decorations in the towers, sounding like an easy thunder or gentle rain when the winds blew strong and all of them moved at once…

Shuichi looked up at the tapestries, and noticed that the streets were… sort of empty? Not really, this was a busy area, but the ‘people’ were just silhouettes. The noise of people talking more an impression than an actual sound. Footsteps that were mere echoes against the stone and hard dirty pathways.

Looking around, Shuichi went to sit down at one of the sidewalk tables, his usual spot, and he saw food and green tea appear on the table, little pies just as he described them. He felt himself calm down further, getting used to this. It was… not real. The silhouettes making it easier for him to accept that. This was just an image. He was in bed with Kokichi. Kaito was likely a few feet away, feeding Miyako.

“... I liked to come here because it felt like I was getting out of the castle, even if that was only just barely technically true.” Shuichi mused, pointing towards the massive metal walls that bordered the entire southern viewpoint from the cafe, massive, towering buildings looming behind it for as far as you could see in either direction, looking for all intents and purposes like simply another part of the city they were in but walled off as he said, “The north gate into the Upper Districts is literally just down the street. It’s a half hour walk for me to get here from my residency building, but I’m only allowed to go to certain shops in the Upper District without an escort, so it’s worth it to get out of the castle borders. No one out here cares if I’m Indentured, so long as I have money to spend.”

That wasn’t entirely true, but it was true enough that Shuichi didn’t feel like elaborating. The more working class your surroundings became, the less people were willing to deny your funds. Though, the more those lower class shops had a bad habit of taking out some of their frustrations on the only person around ‘lesser’ than themselves. No easier way to make yourself feel special and important…

“It’s so strange to be here…” Shuichi said, before looking at the pies, pushing the ham and pineapple pie towards Kokichi as he said, “This one might be the less jarring one for you to try. It’s ham and pineapple, and the crust is bread mixed with oregano and peanuts. This or maybe the chicken pot pie, but they put raspberries into it here, which I’m not sure you would be into…”

Shuichi took the pigeon pie, mixed with vegetables rather than fruits, without telling Kokichi what it was. It was a perfectly tasty dish, but he had a feeling Kokichi wouldn’t like it. Pies made of city street birds was a little hard to get your head around.

“...so, you said there was a lot to explain?”

The heat in Luminary was so different. Even heading into summer and preparing for the usual waves, the few times Kokichi had seen Luminary through his family was just...something completely different. Like the temperature scale was measuring something else entirely. But...it wasn’t uncomfortable--because Shuuichi wasn’t uncomfortable in it.

...he got the impression that wasn’t all to it, when Shuuichi explained why he liked this place. On its own merits, Kokichi was impressed, finding it cozy in its own way, even if the metal and stone was a little weird for him. Not as weird as seeing just...giant walls in the city, not part of a dam or aqueduct or anything. But still...there was a nice feeling of...homecoming in the cafe.

Kokichi hummed curiously as Shuuichi pushed a deliciously golden pie towards him, though Kokichi raised an eyebrow at the flavor combination. Though...Shuuichi was really right. It wasn’t exactly common in Dicean cuisine, but Kokichi had at least heard of chicken pot pie, but...raspberries???

Picking up a fork and digging in, though, Kokichi let out a happier hum, the taste not like anything he’d had before, but far from unpleasant. “Oh...this is good. I like how the crust can kinda season the filling. This...this is a really cool place, Shuu-chan. Thanks for sharing it with me.”

...it didn’t exactly make the coming conversation easier, but Kokichi was determined to get through it.

“...this might seem like a weird or...even cruel place to start, but...it does kind of lead to everything.” Kokichi gave Shuuichi an apologetic look before sighing. “...I’d still appreciate you not going around telling people I’m an Empath, but...things have recently gotten a lot safer for people like me.”

Kokichi looked at the table, his hands, out the windows to see tapestries flapping in the wind. “...conditioning is more than just training, or...whatever,” he started softly. “Everything I’ve heard and learned...it’s a blessing I don’t know exactly what the process was. But...part of it was...done by Empaths.”

“...it’s one of the more difficult things an Empath can do, but...we don’t just sense emotions, or are able to navigate them, when we’re powerful enough. We can make them. Erase them. Basically…” Kokichi sighed, his breath catching slightly as he revealed to someone he loved what he’d personally agonized over. What he’d been afraid to one day reveal to his partners for fear of how they’d see him. “...anything in a mind? What makes a person a person? A strong Empath can destroy and create and re-shape at will.”

He swallowed with difficulty. “...it’s rare to find strong Empaths, and...there are theories that the conditioning process did...other things to make it easier for weaker Empaths to interfere. But...that company that was in charge of all this...the Luminary government… I never found out a ton about it. But...they would take Empaths. To keep the thing going...you know.”

“...oh.” Shuichi said softly.

There was an uncomfortable silence. Shuichi trying to process that, Kokichi letting him, the two sitting there as the wind blew, people who weren’t there making noises that weren’t words. Frowning, Shuichi-- not actually having taken the journal out, just now having it-- started writing some of his short hand into his journal, and was stunned as he looked down at the journal that his short hand wasn’t just strange little equations that only really made sense to him. But as he looked at the equations, each component of the formula was a fully presented, visual idea, with graphs and and interconnecting threads, a clear through line in his mind of what idea was connected to which concepts. His thought process, he supposed, literally written out.

That was neat… Shuichi scowled, shutting the journal and looking away from it. He had always wondered if that style of shorthand had been his own idea or something he had gotten from training…

He had always wondered how much of himself was just ‘Shuichi’ and how much of it was just side-effects of his conditionings. And now to know how literal that concept was… that he might have been explicitly designed like this…

“Maki should have burnt that whole country down.” Shuichi mumbled, all nostalgia he had from being here gone. “If Kaede or Byakuya knew… if Kaito knows… Maki should have killed them all.”

Shuichi didn’t really feel like that. At the very least not about Kaito. But in the moment, Kokichi had been right to worry: Shuichi was mad. Furious over what had been done to him. Done to everyone like himself. People, children, snatched up and horribly mistreated to make their personalities easier to mold… literally.

“Magic… it’s magic? Conditioning is magic?” Shuichi seethed, clutching his chest, scoffing, “Where magic is purely meant to be the work of demons… the Luminary government, the Momota family, was literally using stolen demon magic to control us… what a garbage country…”

“...how do you fix something like that?” Shuichi asked sadly, his shoulders dropping, “Someone comes into your mind and literally molds you into obedience. Can literally control what you dream every night… I always thought conditioning was just convincing us to do things that we otherwise always could. That when our contracts ended, we’d just… know we were allowed to stop. And then we could. But it’s like I was made… how do you fix someone changing your literal mind? No wonder Kaito said Tengan had told him that it wasn’t meant to ever stop… somehow I doubt our mental rewrites came with an expiration date...”

Kokichi cringed under the force of Shuuichi’s fury, but...it was only from feeling it. It wasn’t like he hadn’t felt the same when he found out, only that Kokichi’s had come in the form of an all-encompassing horror. And for how personal it was for Shuuichi too… Kokichi wondered what the people in charge of the Togami Company were doing now. If they’d get the karmic retribution of what they had put millions of people through.

...he’d leave it for the more vindictive among them. Kokichi had already concerned himself with the other side.

Kokichi took a few steadying breaths, but his voice was stronger when he spoke again. “...I told you I don’t know much about how it works, but...for reasons I’ll get to later, I do know that...they didn’t just create you, Shuu-chan. That anything they might’ve given you is incidental at most. It’s…”

He grimaced, feeling dirty even trying to make the comparison. “...it’s like breaking a picture into a puzzle, and rearranging the pieces. Everything that makes you you is still there. Shuu-chan is still Shuu-chan, and no one made that. Just...in a position that makes things harder…” he sighed.

“But…” There Kokichi’s lips twitched up slightly, and he chanced a small, shy glance up at Shuuichi. “...people have been asking that question for a long time. How to fix conditioning. Apparently Dicean Empaths have been working in smaller ways to try and help people… I’m still pretty new to the community, so...I haven’t met anyone who does that yet, but…” He shrugged a little.

“...the prevailing method was...to basically have an Empath live inside someone’s mind for...a month or two. Carefully...untying all the knots conditioning made. But more than just not...really being able to take care of your life or body for a month or two...it was really dangerous.”

Kokichi took another breath. “Because of the Flora.”

“...I don’t know why they were so invested,” Though he had theories, “But...they were. And the Empaths in Luminary would report to them. So...trying to network, or making any kind of waves would put...hundreds of people in danger. Maybe more, if they meddled with the program more. So...making any sort of change on a large level was...slow-going and theoretical, mostly…”

Another breath, a shy look to the side. “...until me.”

Okay, that gave Shuichi way more questions than answers. Once again, the word ‘Flora’ was back, but this time it felt like Kokichi was talking about… Shuichi wasn’t sure. Ikou hadn’t said it was a different word for Empaths, but he had used it in the context of Miyako… and Kokichi made it sound like… Flora had done this to him. Or at least had made it possible. What did that… mean?

What did that mean for Miyako?

But, as much as Shuichi wanted to ask about that, he raised a delicate eyebrow at Kokichi’s last declaration. Kokichi wasn’t much for hyperbole, at least not when it came to his own accomplishments, so… “What does that mean?” Shuichi asked, “Until you?”

Kokichi nodded, knowing that he’d been a little overly-dramatic, but...it was a crazy story, and he needed breaks. Shuuichi probably did too, though he could just be taking Kokichi’s words as they came, and analysis would come later. That seemed like what happened the day Kokichi had shut down.

Opening his mouth, Kokichi shut it again, before reconsidering once more. Voice even softer, Kokichi’s eyebrows drew together, his frustrated gaze aimed at the table. “...Tengan was an Empath too. One that didn’t work with the program, but just liked to fuck with people for fun. That’s what he did to Kai-chan.”

“...through a friend, I found out that Kai-chan… There are these things called tethers. Empaths can, like, ambiantly feel what the people around them are feeling, even more if it’s a strong emotion, and that’s generally what I do with you guys,” Kokichi looked up with an apologetic look, “But if you want to feel someone specifically, no matter how far away they are, you can make a tether. And Tengan had...a really receptive one in Kai-chan. To the point where he...fucking...taunted that it was like another home…”

Kokichi huffed, knowing that it was all done with, but...that would never really be something he let go.

“...he was a strong Empath, and one with a lot of experience. At the time, I hadn’t had much training, and a lot of the things I managed were accidents. But I couldn’t just...let him keep doing it. Keep hurting Kai-chan…” Kokichi’s eyebrows furrowed even more. “...Temp and Alter Ego helped me. It wasn’t...I wanted to make sure that that asshat was booted out, and couldn’t come back. That Kai-chan had defences against people frolicking about in his mind.”

“When I say defences, that’s kind of a literal thing,” Kokichi said, looking up. “The circus in my mind? It’s a type of defence called a lobby, a place to keep people from digging around. But there are different kinds of defences too. Temp...well…”

Kokichi sighed, looking a little tired and out of his depth. “...it’s complicated, but he gave us a way to make strong defences in Kai-chan’s mind, because I didn’t know how to do it, and I don’t think Alter Ego was as practiced then...or maybe they just trusted Temp’s expertise more to hold against the butthole.”

“We had this whole plan for it, but...Tengan noticed. And I got...so fucking pissed and…” Kokichi let out his anger in a sigh. “...I made an ultra-powerful defence. Something that Kai-chan believed in more than anything, so, because of the rules of his mind, it could deal with Tengan no problem. Or...she could.”

“I, uh...made one of the Atuan Saints. Saint Madison.”

… Oh, Kaito.

“You know, every explanation you give… it’s so much.” Shuichi said softly, sighing as he adjusted his cap, sipping at his green tea, “Tengan was an empath… I suppose if you had ever needed real, definitive proof that Kaito had gone through conditioning… it doesn’t feel good to be right about something like that. Especially if… Tengan was still doing these things now? As in, within the last year?”

Shuichi had always felt one positive in Kaito’s life, the only positive that really gave Byakuya credit in their relationship, was that Tengan seemed to lose interest in Kaito when he was roughly thirteen. That once the ‘tutoring sessions’ had ended, that Tengan was more or less an inconsequential annoyance in Kaito’s life, around but never engaging in a meaningful way.

Kaito was twenty-three now. He had been an adult, moved out of the castle, long out of Tengan’s reach… and apparently none of that had been true. Apparently Tengan had never actually let up on the guy. And Shuichi could only think of a few reasons why someone like Tengan would casually hang out in someone like Kaito’s mind. It certainly wasn’t for learning state secrets…

… what a nightmare.

“Saint Madison… which Saint was she again…” Shuichi, as usual these days, found himself actually genuinely wondering, his mind taking a moment to supply him the information, “...Oh, she was the warrior who protected civilians during a siege on their city. That’s right… you made her? In Kaito’s mind?”

Considering the conversation they were having, and why Kokichi was explaining all of this-- beyond the fact that this was something about their shared partner that Shuichi honestly should know about-- Shuichi’s mind did some quick calculations…

“Kokichi?” Shuichi said, eyes widening, “Did you make something that fixed him? Are you why Kaito has been acting so differently?”

Kokichi’s eyes grew heavy, his shoulders slumping under the weight as he nodded. Every explanation was a lot. Things that Kokichi had been progressively struggling with for months, and now he was just telling it all to Shuuichi like a coherent story. Briefly, he wished that Shuuichi really would think this was all a dream, but he promptly shooed those feelings away.

Even if he didn’t remember, Shuuichi had chosen to one day know, so Kokichi didn’t have to carry all this himself. Kokichi was going to respect those wishes.

“I don’t know exactly what Tengan was doing. I didn’t wanna wait around to see, you know? But even just being able to spy on Kai-chan whenever he wanted was bad enough. And...I think he was making Kai-chan’s conditioning worse, too. Like Kai-chan not even being able to get away with workarounds, you know?”

Idly sipping at some of the tea on the table as Shuuichi processed, wondering aloud about Saint Madison, Kokichi wrinkled his nose, not used to green tea tasting like that. If this was the best, no wonder Shuuichi hated it.

But as Shuuichi hit on the point Kokichi had slowly been getting to, he took and breath and nodded, a quiet hope in his eyes as they met Shuuichi’s. “In few words...yes.”

Another breath, and Kokichi made himself sit straighter. “In more…’fixed’ is generous. In making Saint Madison...I managed something that...as far as I or my friends know, no one’s ever done before. I made a defence that’s capable of learning and making decisions. It’s not new life, she’s made both from me and Kai-chan, and it’s...she’s not a person, really. But she’s like one in the ways that matter…” Kokichi’s lips curled up into a nervous but proud smile. “Meaning that...she’s doing the work of an Empath living in someone’s head.”

“Kai-chan’s conditioning manifests as ribbons, tying him down and closing around his neck,” Kokichi winced, “But Saint Madison cuts through them and can help Kai-chan keep calm. Really...he’s doing all the work--she’s just giving him a chance to do it.”

“But...yeah. I...I made something that’s capable of breaking conditioning.”

Kokichi then quickly looked to the side. “...the night I made her was the night I had that really bad nosebleed in bed…”

“Oh…” Shuichi took another sip of his green tea-- ugh. The nostalgia was wearing off. This drink was so bad.-- as he contemplated that, “So using your abilities does have a physical effect on you. I thought it might, your nose was bleeding when Temp took me to help you too. I see… it’s a shame that it puts so much stress on you, but…”

“That’s still a remarkable gift you’ve given him, Kokichi,” Shuichi said softly, “It’s honestly priceless. Kaito’s freedom from Byakuya, from Luminary… it means more than just as good news for him. Maki and I… we spent our whole lives wishing we could do that for him. You saw how helpless our attempts to make any sort of dent in it were…”

“So, thank you.” Shuichi said, smiling gratefully at Kokichi, “Outside of being my boyfriend, outside of it being the right thing to do, Kaito’s been my friend my whole life, and I… just don’t think I can really convey to you, how much what you did means to me. Thank you for taking that risk.”

Shuichi’s mind still hadn’t filled in the blanks. It hadn’t occurred to him, yet, to question his and Maki’s improved conditioning. A part of him still thought it was impossible, that maybe the lessening roadblocks in his mind were maybe just temporary anomalies, because he wasn’t being triggered by loved ones. It hadn’t occurred to him that Kokichi had done the same for him yet.

What did occur to him was...

“If Empaths have been trying to do this for, presumably, a while now, and you managed it on accident…” Shuichi’s brow furrowed, giving Kokichi a newly appraising look, “... Kokichi? Exactly… I’m not sure how to ask this. If there are different types of Empaths, or if its purely a strength thing… how unusual are you? I… maybe that’s the wrong way to word it, but...”

Shuichi was just shy of asking what Kokichi actually was. Because… it kind of sounded like he was, even as far as magic as Shuichi understood it, something else. Something more.

“Most of it’s easier now, but...I mean, it is sorta magic, but the way people explain it is really...practical. Empaths use our brains as a muscle...or organ, or whatever; we just have different capabilities. Wear ourselves out, and we’re going to be sore or hurt. If something physically hurts our brains, we can’t perform as well.” Maybe one day Kokichi would get into what it was like during his coma, but this conversation was already so much.

Kokichi was determined to talk to Shuuichi, to explain everything now that he finally could, but...it hadn’t erased his fear. So when Shuuichi called it a gift, said that Kokichi had done something amazing… Kokichi let out a breath, feeling lighter than he had in a long time.

He smiled gratefully and reached out for one of Shuuichi’s hands, and...maybe it was that flood of relief that made him a little extra vulnerable. His smile wobbling, Kokichi managed to get out, “Pretty unusual.”

Taking in a shuttered breath, Kokichi blinked back tears as his voice peaked. “You know, that’s...that’s not even the only thing I’ve done that no one’s heard of an Empath doing before… There’s...it’s not just that I’m an Empath that made me think… It’s more than that that fills in words like “freak” for me…”

A few tears escaped Kokichi’s eyes, but even as his smile wobbled, it didn’t fall. Instead...it cemented, and Kokichi leaned forward. “But I don’t regret helping Kai-chan. I don’t regret what I am, and what I can do, because...it gives me a chance. It gives me a chance against this stupid world that’s hurt all of us so much, to try and make things better. So for Kai-chan...I’ll be a freak of nature.”

Another, stronger breath as Kokichi squeezed Shuuichi’s hand, looking up at his boyfriend with a blazing conviction. “For you, I’ll be what I am.”

...Shuichi flushed a little. Squeezing Kokichi’s hand back but using his free had to adjust his hat to hide his reddening a little. Reminded of the version of Kokichi he had met that had… left quite an impression on the detective, bravely staring down a rampaging man with a sword, wearing a similar smile…

Phew. It was hot in Luminary.

“Well… I suppose if anyone could.” Shuichi said, taking off his hat now and just fanning himself a little. Damn, it was warm. Finally managing to look back at Kokichi and smirking, “You’re really something incredible. What a strange person I’ve had a child with…”

...at that, Shuichi frowned.

Putting his hat back on, he leaned forward and idly brushed the few wet tear streaks from of Kokichi’s face. The gesture soft and affectionate, though his face was filled with new apprehension and concern.

“...Kokichi.” Shuichi said softly, “Do I need to be afraid for Miyako?”

Kokichi laughed, just...monumentally relieved to be accepted by one family member for all that he was. He knew his memories of Kaito weren’t that off, and that Kaito still would love him, and Maki didn’t have any room to talk because she was a dragon, but...still. It felt good.

...and maybe feeling Shuuichi’s fluster was a nice bolster too.

He pressed into Shuuichi’s touch as he wiped his face, and...well, back to it.

“...there’s more to say on the rest of the story, but…” Kokichi looked Shuuichi in his eyes and squeezed his hand again. “Miyako is going to be okay. She’s...well, a stronger Empath that I thought she was going to be, but that’s alright. I’m going to help her learn the ropes. And...remember how I started this saying that the world just got a lot safer for Empaths?” Kokichi knew how deadly serious this conversation was, but he couldn’t help the smile playing at his lips.

“With the program dismantled, Luminary Empaths are free. They’re not gonna try and whisk her away anywhere. And…” There Kokichi’s smile did drop. “...I’m still learning about what it means for her to be a Flora. A...er, ‘big’ Flora, apparently… But she’s safe from the hivemind, and I have a friend to help me and her when Miya gets older to teach her how to protect herself. And...if anyone tries to come in person…”

Kokichi’s expression darkened. “...we’ll be ready. I refuse to let our daughter have the same childhood I did, and...so far, there’s no indication that the Flora are even considering doing anything. But I’ll make sure that it never happens.”

“...hivemind?” Shuichi asked, just looking more alarmed. Big? Okay, so a Flora was different than being an Empath, and… apparently Miyako was also a strong empath, which made sense, Shuichi supposed, if Kokichi was one. And…

“Hold on. Let’s review.” Shuichi sighed, closing his eyes and slightly crossing his arms, putting one hand over his face as he suddenly looked intense and focused, “Empaths are essentially people who can do a variety of ‘mind based magic’, of which you are exceptionally powerful, and Miyako is one as well. As was Tengan. Empaths were responsible for conditioning in Luminary, but Kaede dismantling the program means those Empaths, likely a form of Indentured themselves, have been freed. You in turn have managed to work out a method to help at the very least Kaitos’ conditioning, or, at least have worked out a way to protect him from it while he fixes it himself.”

He continued, “The indentured program is what was kidnapping Empaths, which is dangerous in and of itself, but that wasn’t what made trying to fix conditioning dangerous: it was…” this was where Shuichi’s understanding got fuzzy, “Things called ‘Flora. Of which… are connected to a hivemind, and… of which Miyako is a ‘big’ one… but is not currently connected to a hivemind and…”

Solve for a.

“Kokichi?” Shuichi asked, “Is Temp’s son Addason also a ‘Flora’?”

Kokichi looked at Shuuichi in confusion for a moment, before… He sat back, though still holding Shuuichi’s hand, with a sigh. “Temp didn’t tell you…”

...there had been a lot going on that day.

Bolstering himself up again, Kokichi listened to Shuuichi do a rundown of the situation, as he’d explained it thus far, occasionally nodding to confirm that Shuuichi had gotten it all right. It was...a much more concise explanation, though Shuuichi saying it back could leave out details and events Kokichi thought were pretty important for initial understanding.

And as Shuuichi became more hesitant when the subject of Flora returned, Kokichi set himself up to explain...but of course Shuuichi was a genius.

Kokichi blinked before laughing softly. “Smarty-pants Shuu-chan… Yeah, Addie’s a Flora too.”

“So...this is another really big thing, but...like, magical creatures? That you’d read about in story books?” Kokichi looked up and squeezed Shuuichi’s hand for reassurance. “They’re real. And there’s this species called Flora. They have a hivemind, though every Flora is their own person, too. It’s not like they’re just parts of a big person. Miya’s our Miya, and Addason’s gonna be Addason.”

Kokichi looked over into the interior of the cafe, not really looking at the details this time as he rubbed circles into Shuuichi’s hand with his thumb. “...apparently, a long time ago, they were known as a healing species. The kind of folks you’d go to for hospitality and reprieve. But Flora have a hierarchy based on their presence in the hivemind. Their size, so to speak. And how big you are determines not just social, but literal influence on others.”

His expression darkened. “...and their current queen is a raging, racist bitch. She...fucking...treats humans like we’re insects and she’s an exterminator. And how she even treats other Flora isn’t much better.”

“...so, when we found out about our kids? Temp, Alter Ego, and I have been working to protect the kids from the hivemind,” Kokichi sighed. “It’s possible, Flora can do it themselves, but since Miyako and Addason are so young, we’re stepping in to make sure that the queen keeps her business far, far away from the kids.”

Shuichi squeezed Kokichi’s hand, staring down at his mostly finished cup of green tea. At the bottom of the cup were little mushy remains of the tea-leaves that had given the water its flavor and nutrients. Shuichi had caught someone once who had committed crimes because her various fortune telling beliefs had ‘told her too’, and she had feverishly explained seeing the future in used tea leaves. She hadn’t even been charged for contract with a demon, that was how bullshit it had obviously been…

He looked at those little mushy leaves that had convinced that woman to hurt people, and said, “That’s what’s wrong with Danganronpa, isn’t it. The Dead Forest, the silver vines, the… the poppy’s. It’s why Aba and I have both had Flora children. Danganronpa is made up of a population of them. This is… how they reproduce, I suppose. This is why they have all those embargoes, are so exclusive with their visas…” Shuichi wasn’t sure what the connection between Flora and Danganronpa and the Indentured Program really was, but it couldn’t be good. But a species that was used to mentally manipulating and overpowering each other? Shuichi wouldn’t be surprised if Flora had taught Empaths how to condition, rather then it being discovered on its own. It all made… a morbid amount of sense.

(That Danganronpa History Book said Junko Enoshima had been around for hundreds of years.)

Shuichi, nine, eight months ago would have been thrilled to learn about all of this. Would have felt so validated. He had been right! Danganronpa as a country had something to do with the death cult (because they had to have by this point, there was no doubt in Shuichi’s mind), with their addictions, their bodily changes, and had been covering it up. He had been right.

Now?... He just sort of felt tired. And, weirdly enough, like he had let Miyako down somehow. She wouldn’t exist if not for his mistakes with the poppy’s, but at the same time… what a complicated existence Shuichi had made for her…

“...Alter Ego isn’t much of a name.” Shuichi finally said. Because this was all starting to be a bit… much. Maki’s prediction of a panic attack had been wrong, but… Shuichi had also spent the last week a little uncertain if any of it had really happened. And now… his heart thumped through his chest, adrenaline starting to spike a little as he said, “Whoever named him that is even more uncreative than I am… the little golden cat in the yellow raincoat…”

...Shuichi’s eyes became pinpricks. He said, each word a breathy huff, “What was with the tiny Kaito, Kokichi? That was… pretty odd too...”

Luminary was getting too hot. And the non words of the people around them were getting louder. Deafening.

Kokichi nodded softly as Shuuichi figured it all out himself, expression more grimace than smile. It all came back to the Flora. Why Luminary had gotten so bad--though Kokichi still didn’t know exactly why the Flora had been targeting Luminary so pointedly--everything to do with conditioning, the death cults, the poppies, so much of the hardship their family had gone through that year…

And their daughter was one too. But Kokichi would do whatever he could to make sure she wouldn’t have to bear the cruelty of a queen she wasn’t even a subject of.

It was a lot. A lot. And Shuuichi had already taken on so much that night.

Kokichi’s eyes widened as he started to feel the overwhelmed panic around them, and he quickly stood up, going around the table to be right by Shuuichi’s side. “Shuu-chan...Shuu-chan, I know it’s a lot. You can freak out. But I’m right here, okay? I’m right next to you, and Kai-chan’s in our room looking after all of us. You’re not alone. Can we take some deep breaths?”

Shuichi’s eyes were starting to fill with tears. Not because he was sad, but because the sheer adrenaline spike was starting to squeeze at his chest, feeling like it was strangling him. He tried to answer Kokichi, but whimpered instead. Tried to breathe, but each breath didn’t feel like enough. Wind blowing through the tapestries in a fierce, violent gale as everyone talked too loud… it was too hot…

He wanted to apologize. He was sorry. He was so sorry. He didn’t want to freak out. He didn’t want to have gotten addicted to poppy’s. He didn’t want to have burdened their daughter with such a difficult existence. He hadn’t been good enough. Smart enough. He had just wanted to be strong. He had wanted to be strong enough to protect Kaito and Maki for once. To be the one they could rely on. He had just wanted to get Maki home. He hadn’t meant for all of this. He was so sorr--

“Okay, okay, it’s okay, we’re sitting up now, let’s go.” Kaito said, Shuichi’s eyes shooting open as he choked on the air around him, loudly gasping, as Kaito pulled him and tilted him forward a little, saying, “We’re gonna put our arms over our head. Just enough to get some air into your chest. It’s okay, it’s okay--”

“‘M sorry,” Shuichi whimpered, eyes wide with panic, staring at Kaito in open, shocked bafflement as Kaito grabbed his right arm and pulled it over his head, still gasping for air as his back was straightened, the air not feeling entirely useless anymore, but his breaths quickening now that his chest could take in more of it, “Huaaugh, sorry--”

Miya started to wail, and Kaito shouted, “Kokichi? Babe, wake up, please! I need help!”

Shuuichi was panicking, and it wasn’t just the precipice anymore. Kokichi had wanted to tell him everything, but...everything was too much. Everything was why Kokichi had given himself amnesia ever since the start.

...he’d done it again. Forced someone to cope in moments what he’d had ages for.

Damnit.

Kokichi kept trying to calm Shuuichi down, but as the wind outside the cafe grew more violent, he could practically feel himself being evicted from Shuuichi’s mind, landing back in his own for just a second before--

Kokichi’s eyes popped open, too blurry to see much, but he could certainly hear gasped breaths, and he recognized the dark forms of Shuuichi sitting up and Kaito leaning over the bed. “Wha’si--”

And Miya crying.

Barely even awake, Kokichi quickly hopped out of bed, heading over to the crib and trusting Kaito to continue with Shuuichi. “Mi...hah…” he gently, sleepily murmured, picking her up and holding her head to his heart, blinking over with increasing concern as his eyes finally focused on Shuuichi.

Kaito let out a breath of relief as Kokichi was up and out, going to soothe Miya as Kaito focused on Shuichi. He kept his hand on Shuichi’s arm, and only tightened his grip when Shuichi started to fight him. His panic flaring up at Kaito’s hold, Shuichi not liking to be touched during the worst of it. But Kaito had too, at this moment. Shuichi needed air in his lungs, and he hadn’t been getting it laying down.

So, gritting his teeth, Kaito wrapped his arm around Shuichi’s middle, holding tight and keeping his arm elevated over his head as Shuichi tried to wrench himself away from him, thrashing and making pained, furious sounds that likely would have been demands for Kaito to get off or insults hurled his way if Shuichi could actually get a steady enough breath in to do so. “I know, I know, I know.” Kaito grumbled, ignoring Shuichi’s outrage, “One clear breath. One clear breath and I’ll let you go. I know, I know, I know…”

Shuichi’s face had been red, but now it was pale. White dots spotting his cheeks, his eyes rapidly shiting and rolling… but there was a sudden breath, like Shuichi was taking in multiple breaths in the same intake… and in the last one, there was a clear sound. Like the air hadn’t stopped at his throat but was actually going somewhere…

It technically wasn’t the first breath he had promised, but Kaito let go of Shuichi and backed off when Shuichi started coughing, each breath between cough coming in clearer, Shuichi’s arms immediately dropping and his back hunching, but the initial need for a good breath settled. Kaito moving backwards on the breath and carefully watching Shuichi while his partner whimpered and gasped.

“...” Kaito waited patiently, and when he saw some clarity come back to Shuichi’s face, said, “Shuichi, tell me what you see. Explain the room.”

“-uck you,” Shuichi said in a burst of anger, pissed Kaito would ask anything of him… but that random, pointless aggression eased literally by the time he was finished saying the curse, breathing heavier but steadier as he looked around, gaze bleary but focusing, “...d-desks kinda... Hauh…. Kinda messy… g-gotta… clean it… haaauh… closet… Kokichi h-hid in the closet… Kokichi.”

Shuichi’s eyes suddenly scanned the room, worried… before relaxing slightly as he saw Kokichi by the crib, soothing Miyako, who seemed to be quieting down, “...sorry… sorry, Kokichi… I didn’t… I thought I was okay and it just… hit me all at once…”

“Sounds like someone had a tough dream.” Kaito said softly, watching Shuichi as his boyfriend got his breathing under control, watching Kokichi and Miyako. “What else, Shuichi? Let's wait for all that extra energy to go allll the way down. What else do you see?”

“...o-our curtains are kinda heavy… l-like it when the fabric moves… miss tapestries… loved listening to them in the wind...”

Kokichi could only watch in horror as Shuuichi struggled against Kaito and his own lungs, but he fought himself to keep calm. (Miya was frightened too. The feeling of pure panic coming off of Shuuichi...it was something no infant should feel.)

He curled around her gently, starting to gently rock his body back and forth, even humming softly though Shuuichi’s gasps were still painfully loud. It was a simple, slow, lullaby-like tune, no words associated with it, though Kokichi had thought it was a nice song.

Taking a breath, still looking over with worried eyes, Kokichi murmured to Miya between phrases of the song. “Mi~yaaa… It’s okay Mi~yaaa… Dada had a bad dream, but Dad is taking care of him, it’ll be okay. I know it’s scary...it’s how we feel when you wake up crying too. Oh, sweet girl, shh, it’s alright…”

...Shuuichi was calming down. And...while Kokichi didn’t know why he was apologizing to him...Kokichi felt like...it was his own fault. Somehow.

It took another few minutes still, but… eventually the gaping stopped, and each breath came easier. Clearer. Shuichi occasionally listing something in the room he saw, sweat beading down his face, but mostly just falling silent. Listening to Kokichi’s on again, off again melody, occasionally looking up to see Kaito staring at him, at first serious, almost fierce, but his expression softening as Shuichi looked up at him again.

Kaito grinned, scooting a little closer to Shuichi as he said softly, “We feeling any better? You up to a hug yet?”

“...” Shuichi blinked tiredly, nodding.

“Awww, there we go, come here. My handsome guy… been a minute since we had one of those, huh? Guess we were overdue.” Kaito laughed gently, pulling Shuichi into a hug as the other man laid his against Kaito’s neck, resting as Kaito held him firmly, rubbing up and down his arm as he said, “You were having a hard dream, Shuichi… should have woken you up sooner, but I kept hoping it’d settle… my poor guy… do you want to talk about it? What were you dreaming that got you so bad?”

“...” Shuichi looked over at Kokichi. His mind grasping for things to say, “...I can’t really remember.” He lied, sighing as he closed his eyes, “I just… I think… Miyako has all these… side effects… I felt like I had let her down… I was so stupid…”

“What?” Kaito huffed, shaking his head, “Handsome, man… our Miya’s only here because of that. And her side effects are her being awesome and more awesome. What are you apologizing for… she owes everything to you. We all do.” Kaito laughed lightly, kissing the top of his head, “That’s not something you need to apologize for. It’s a gift… right, ‘Kichi? Back me up here babe.” Kaito grinned.

Slowly, they all started to calm down, Miyako’s cries softening as Shuuichi’s breaths got more steady, the tension in Kaito and Kokichi starting to relax. And by the time Shuuichi was in Kaito’s arms, Miya was just down to grumpy gurgles, her fatigue starting to take over again now all the scary stuff was going away.

However...if Shuuichi had a dream about Miya…

Kokichi sighed softly and rounded the bed, Miyako still in his arms as he got closer to Shuuichi and Kaito. “...look at her, Shuu-chan. She’s incredible. She might be different, but...that’s wonderful. Her differences make her her, and that’s amazing. She’s here because of you, and even though it was difficult, life is the greatest gift, and it’s one only you were able to give her.”

“You haven’t let her down at all. And what happened wasn’t your fault.” Kokichi gave Shuuichi a soft look, adjusting his hold on Miyako a moment to keep her from slipping. “We’re here now and...it’s wonderful. She’s wonderful. And so are you.”

“Hell yeah. Well said, beautiful.” Kaito grinned, placing another few kisses against Shuichi’s head, who was staring at Kokichi with tired, sad eyes… but they did lighten, after a moment.

“... she is wonderful. You’re wonderful too, Kokichi...a…”

Shuichi had been about to say ‘A Freak of Nature’ with an entirely sincere amount of awe in the statement… but thankfully he had the good sense to know how very cruel that would be, without the context Shuichi had. So instead Shuichi took a breath, and started again, “...everything we could have asked for. Incredible… you’re both going to be incredible…”

“... yeah! Heck yeah!” Kaito grinned, admittedly not entirely certain he was following Shuichi’s train of thought, but, well… sure! Kokichi and Miyako were both incredible! And Shuichi was wonderful! Kaito was thoroughly on board! “Everything is good right now, handsome. Annnnnd~ it will all be even better when dada, daddy, and baby all go back to sleep and get the rest all of them are absolutely going to need in the morning.”

Kaito said this pointedly, glazing at the clock, it being extremely late, or very early, depending, “Nightmares notwithstanding? You guys will all feel better after some rest. ‘Kichi, wanna trade a sweet, itty-bitty baby for a handsome partner? I’ve got one right here for you.”

Kokichi smiled slightly, not...really sure why Shuuichi seemed so awed and sincere, but...it was nice. And if it helped him come out of his dream, Kokichi would be even more thankful.

Sighing softly, Kokichi nodded and prepared to hand Miyako over to Kaito. Seriously, it felt like he hadn’t slept a wink… Ah the life of a new parent…

“She’s drifted off again, thankfully,” Kokichi softly murmured as he relinquished their daughter. “I’m glad rocking and humming worked this time…”

Yawning once his arms were free, Kokichi crawled back into bed. Gently, he placed a hand on Shuuichi’s arm, eyes concerned, even if Shuuichi had mostly calmed down. “...okay to cuddle?”

As Kaito shuffled off with Miyako, coo’ing about sleepy babies and bad dreams, Shuichi nodded, scooting in closer to Kokichi and laying down with him. “...I’m tired.” Shuichi realized, sighing softly as he cuddled into Kokichi, “I don’t think that’s good for sleep… I’m sorry I got so upset, Kokichi. I’m really okay… I just got overwhelmed…”

Kokichi put a gentle arm around Shuuichi and gave him a curious look before just barely kissing his cheek. “I can’t imagine panic attacks are good for much… You don’t have to apologize--it’s not something you can control. I’m just glad you’re alright now, okay? Let’s get some more sleep.”

The first of any month was usually never a holiday, but there was a certain freshness that people carried themselves with that brought cheer nonetheless, especially on the first day of a season. The night had been difficult, and Kokichi had been a bit zombie-like when he woke up for his morning shift, but there had been a bit of a surprise. Shuuichi had offered to take over the last bit of Kokichi’s shift, claiming he wanted to start getting used to claiming his own time and...it was reason enough, and Kokichi was tired enough that he agreed.

So...after a nap to try and get his brain working again...Kokichi was taking some time to himself. Getting out of the castle and...enjoying his life, just as he said he would.

Everything would be fine. Shuuichi wasn’t on bedrest so there was another person that could handle things. He wouldn’t be out too long…

Kokichi let out a short breath and ran a hand through his hair, rolling his eyes at himself a little. Geez...it’d be fine.

While it was nice just walking around, Kokichi did have something of a purpose to his excursion. He had already checked the Powells in town for that mysterious book he’d found in the archives and they didn’t have a copy so...today would be a trip to smaller, more specialized bookstores.

...Kaito would probably be pretty excited to go on an adventure like this with him, huh… It felt too wrong for multiple of them to be out and about right now, not when Miya was so little… Maybe Dr. Mariah really hadn’t been kidding about five years…

Slipping into a dark-stained building with small windows in the front, Kokichi sighed to himself as he set about looking for his quandary.

Three bookstores, all scattered across the city (not literally, as they were all weighted towards the commercial district, but...you know) and Kokichi was beginning to lose a little hope. He knew there were copies out there, since anything in the archive was copied for posterity, but...there really could just not be commercial copies. People who had bound and formatted the content into an actual, like, reading book.

He really didn’t understand why; it was a fascinating premise, and the original being bound in some kind of scaly hide would certainly have sparked creative desires in people who bound books for artisanal purposes…

In his fourth shop, Kokichi...wasn’t expecting much, this place for “occult” and alternative various wares rather than just books, but it was worth a shot. Trying not to let any weariness show in his smile at one of the employees, he gave them a little wave. “Hiya, happy first day of summer! I was wondering if you all had a particular book? It’d be an archive copy, and the original has no title, but it’s written like a wilderness guide and bestiary for mythical creatures.”

The employee raised her eyebrow incredulously, “You’re… looking for a book with no title? Uuuuuuuuuh, haaaaaaaaave youuuuuuu checked the F section? For maybe fictional creatures, oooooooooooooor--” The employee interrupted herself, really thinking about it, before saying with some apology, “Like, isssssss it not having a title a part of it? Cause I think I’d know off-hand if we had a book like that. Whiiiiiiiiiiich weeeeeeee dooooooon’t, soooooooooooorryyyyyy.”

“...” Kerry nervously shifted from foot to foot, glancing at the floor, glancing at the door, tapping their fingers together, all five at once. They tried to, if they could help it, not talk to Kokichi, ever since the dance, but… b-but-- “Um! Kokichi! I know where you can find a book like that!”

They immediately felt mortified as Kokichi glanced over at them, wanting to sink into the floor and disappear entirely. They laughed nervously and said, “Hi! It’s me… Terry!” Like Kokichi straight up just might not remember them.

Kokichi sighed, having expected about as much. Though he probably would still check out the bookcases--in smaller shops the person he talked to was very likely to have been the person (or at least one of the people) handling the stock, and he figured that they’d remember a strange book like that, but...still. He didn’t have the time to go and check a bunch of shops all the time, so it paid to be thorough!

He’d been about to thank the woman before a familiar voice spoke up, and Kokichi turned, his eyebrows raised in surprise. Kokichi had barely seen hide or hair of Kerry in ages, and...honestly one of the last places he’d expect to see them was in an occult shop but...everyone had their hobbies.

The surprise only lasted a moment before Kokichi broke out into a smile, happy to see his friend, even if they hadn’t left on the best circumstances. “Hey, hi, Kerry! Been a while, huh--happy summer.”

Tilting his head slightly, Kokichi stepped a little closer to the teen. “You...know where I could find the book? Where?”

“O-oh, well…” Kerry pressed their fingers together, glancing nervously at the shopkeep, who just rolled her eyes and walked away, not up to listening in on the nervous, spaztic teen. Kerry still hesitated a moment, before leaning in and saying quietly, “Uh, well… have you heard of the Traveling Curiosities Market? The one that’s always moving around? U-uh… I know where they are this week! Word got around my school, uh, and some of those kids still keep in touch, so… you know the catacomb entrance? Over at the south bridge?”

Recognition lit up Kokichi’s eyes. “Oh, yeah! I’ve never managed to make it, but I’ve heard people talking about it. I heard they have really cool bone artwork for sale, or...at least they did at one time.”

Though...the catacomb entrance? There weren’t catacombs in Usott… By the south bridge there was…

Kokichi raised an eyebrow. “...you mean the service entrance to the sewers? That’s the only, like...underground-ish area over there…”

“Oh, you got out of school the other week, didn’t you?” Kokichi hummed. “Congratulations!”

Terry looked a little surprised, before laughing awkwardly, “Oh! No, I mean… I’ve been out of school for awhile. That’s one of the reasons I-I’m working at the castle… or, was, ya know. N-nevermind! It doesn’t matter, thanks! And…” Terry looked confused at Kokichi’s correction, before blushing, “Oh! Sorry, no, yes, obviously, we… the kids I grew up with have been calling it the catacombs for aaaages. There’s signs up and everything, uh… but, yes. The sewer entrance. Sorry, I wasn’t even thinking about it, Catacombs is just the nickname.”

Terry poked his fingers together, before saying, “Uuuuuuuh, I know that place gets really busy at sunset… I mean, you might be able to find what you need now, but I know most of the stalls don’t even start opening until nightfall. Uhhhhh oh! Congratulations on the baby! Uhhhhh… probably makes it hard to go anywhere at night…”

Poking their fingers together some more, they suddenly said, “If you describe it to me, I c-can try to keep an eye out for it when I visit? I…” they smiled uneasily, “I like the, uh… w-well, obviously I know none of it is real, but I like fun little fortune telling stuff and witchy stuff and weird, uuuuh, figurines and decorations and stuff… it’s all in good fun, right? I think it's neat…”

Kokichi rubbed the back of his head. “Ah, sorry, I don’t mean to assume. We all recently went to Tim’s--my nephew--last day of school party, so it was on the brain. And I didn’t know about the nickname...that’s really cool! It does kinda have that sort of spooky vibe, even if it’s just, yanno, sewers.”

...could he manage to go check out the sewers, though? It was...kind of out of the way, and Kokichi hadn’t sought out Nazumi on the basis that he’d be in plain sight for the few hours he could justify being away. ...and if it wasn’t even opening until sunset…

Kokichi deflated slightly before widening his eyes, looking at Kerry like they had just offered to share a jumbo cinnamon roll. “Really?! That would mean so much to me, Kerry, thank you!” Laughing slightly, he shook his head, as if to brush off Kerry’s excuses for being into “occult” stuff, even if he’d initially been surprised by the teen’s interest. “It is fun, isn’t it? My husband’s terrified of all that stuff, but I think it’s pretty cool. Man...I don’t remember how long ago it was, but I saw this gorgeous fortune telling deck at Gargoyle’s once. Got really close to picking it up, but it was a bit out of my price range at the time…”

Beaming at Kerry, Kokichi opened up his body language. “Thank you!”

Terry smiled, and while it was sincere, it was a little crooked and uneasy as they nodded vigorously, “Sure! No problem. So…?”

Terry listened patiently as Kokichi described it the best he could, before watching the princes’s eyes light up and explain that the best way to check if it was the real deal was to look for-- “The Last Dragon? O-okay… that makes sense. A book like that probably has an index or table of contents or something, I-I think I can look for that.”

Poking at their cheek thoughtfully, they said, “I-I’ll check it out tonight then. If I find it, I’ll just swing by the castle? Would that work?”

“Absolutely,” Kokichi nodded, before laughing sheepishly. “I haven’t had the most consistent sleep schedule with the baby and all, but I’ll let the others know so someone will wake me if you swing by. Oh, and of course I’d pay you back for it.”

Considering, Kokichi tilted his head to the side. “...I...have no idea how much it’d be, actually… Considering I’ve only seen the original, and no one seems to have even heard of it… Would you be comfortable with me giving you money for it, and then just give me back the change if you find it? I’d hate for it to be, like, cringe-worthy expensive and you not be able to get other stuff you want from the market.”

At this, Terry looked entirely relaxed, even a little dismissive, as they shook their heads, “Oh, no… that’s alright. M-my parents and grandparents and… well, I come f-from a long line of financial advisors and accountants? My parents figured out a savings plan for me before I was even born… I mean, all that to say I don’t really… I can afford it.” Terry shrugged, “Whatever it is. Th-though of course you can pay me back when I, or, if I find it. I just mean in the sense that it won’t put me out unless it’s… would you even want it if it were something insane, like thousands of gold?”

Kokichi relaxed, glad to know he wouldn’t be asking something financially uncomfortable from his friend, though he cringed afterward, not having really considered the possibility of the book being that expensive. Usually books only became that pricey for, like...original copies of notebooks of famed authors or artists.

If it was expensive enough to cost multiple paychecks…

Kokichi sighed softly. “...probably not. That’s too much of a stretch for me, especially for something that’s just an idle curiosity…”

He smiled a bit at Kerry. “I was giving a tour of the library archives to the kids and we found it just randomly. I’d never seen anything quite like it… It’s the kind of thing I’d love to settle down and read through, but I get too nervous handling the archive books for long… And it’s something I’d like to share with Miya too, someday. Definitely not something I’d do with a fragile, priceless tome…”

“...and I dunno…” Kokichi murmured, his gaze going a little far away. “...some of it just feels kinda...important, for fantasy.”

Terry looked a little curious at that, “...well, I promise to really look for it then. At the least I can let you know who has it, if it exists at all, and you could negotiate it. Though… if you have the original copy? Maybe, in the worst case scenario, you could pay for a copy to be made? I bet you could even make it a government project, since I think the point of the archive is to make sure those books aren’t lost forever, right? Copies would be ensuring the book’s lifespan, right?”

Kokichi nodded, looking a little sheepish. “I could, yeah… I guess I just wanted to see if someone had already done it. Usually you can find archive books somewhere, yeah? People get excited to bring up old works, making new cover art or trying to replicate the original… But, yeah.”

“...I think… If you don’t find it at the market, I’ll look into getting a copy made,” Kokichi huffed softly to himself, a sheepish laugh. “Maybe I’ll make it a birthday present for myself. I kinda have the feeling I’m gonna totally forget the day this year.”

He shrugged, a motion meaning, ‘baby and all’.

Terry nodded. That made sense. “Well, if it’s at the market, I’ll find it! A-and then you can consider that an early birthday present! Uh… or not! Depending on how you feel about it! So… yeah! I’ll do my best!”

Looking around, feeling a little like they were imposing on Kokichi’s time now and looking for a fluid and casual way to dismiss themselves, said, “Well… I should probably be going then. Uh… it was nice to see you, Kokichi. I’m glad the Miyako thing is going well. Is the Miyako thing going well? They asked, realizing they had assumed and not actually asked. “Is Shuichi, uh… okay? I heard he was okay, that was the word around the grapevine.”

“Thank you, I really appreciate it,” Kokichi said softly, before smiling more, recognizing the out, even if it was littered with questions. “Miyako’s wonderful. Even if you don’t find the book, I’d love to introduce you to her at some point. She’s so cuuuuute,” he giggled.

“And Shuu-chan’s doing really well. He’s actually the reason I’m out and about today--said he was feeling well enough to take over baby duty early.” As much as Kokichi could go on, Kerry had tried to get out of the conversation, so he gave the teen a warm nod. “I hope you and John and your parents are doing alright. I’ll catch you later?”

Kerry nodded vigorously, “A-absolutely! I’ll see you later, Kokichi. Uh…” Kerry looked around awkwardly, before just saying, “Bye!” and heading out, even if they hadn’t… actually finished shopping, but sorta feeling like they had to make a show of actually going somewhere. They’d, uh… go get ice cream or something. Come back after.

Despite now having a plan with someone else to find the book, Kokichi figured he’d still stop at the last place he had in mind. He was out anyway and he didn’t quite feel like heading back home quite yet. Despite the gnawing worry in his chest that was only quieted by his enjoyment and purpose, Kokichi was happy to be out and about. And not being home literally all of the time would probably help him out in the long run.

And...if he managed to find the book, and Kerry found it too? Kokichi didn’t mind having two copies. He could keep one in better condition to gift to Miya one day.

The last place on his mental list was, admittedly, a last-ditch effort kind of place, as it was more of a crafts shop than anything else, and most of the books he had noticed there were guide books and lifestyle living books, but...well, he was going under the assumption that the book would be used as a sort of prop if it was in that shop, but the book was the book.

In that context, though, it was less likely that the shopkeeps would’ve flipped through it more than just making sure there wasn’t anything obscene in it, so he just gave the person behind the counter a friendly wave before heading in, checking out the small rack of book-books first.

A book of jacket patterns, a guide to costume armor and articulated wings and other accoutrements, an idea guide for quilts...hm. What to do with broken pottery, a how-to guide for needle felting, an identification guide for architecture… A--

“...Kokichi?”

At first, Kokichi just turned, the voice not kicking in yet, a greeting on the tip of his tongue for whoever had recognized him, but his eyes were not so detached and as soon as he caught sight of her, he froze.

Nao.

(...when was the last time he’d even seen her? Before they went on vacation? He didn’t think he’d even seen her afar in town. It sometimes felt like she’d moved away, though Kokichi knew Shuuichi had seen Yasu around.

It’d been...what, nine months since he’d seen her?)

(Someone he’d been used to seeing almost everyday. Someone who had laughed with him and entertained his ideas and taught him about stories and what it meant to have heavy regrets and a desire to grow, who had held him and given him kisses on the head and made him feel so proud and safe and lov…)

Kokichi felt his breath catch, a sinking feeling in his chest. That deep, burning feeling of outrage blooming up through his body and pricking at his eyes and…

He wasn’t ready for this.

(...she looked tired. Messier, less put together than he had ever seen her. Shoulders hunched in where they used to be pridefully thrown back, trying to make herself look smaller despite being pretty tall. She felt...hollower. Regretful. Unsure. Just...totally lacking the confidence he’d always felt reassured by.)

Kokichi nodded gently but turned more fully, heading for the door with a quiet, “Excuse me,” ignoring the sound of a broken heart crumbling even more behind him. And within him.

...maybe he should start heading home.

It was funny. Despite a hatred that kept around her like a grand wall, despite a resentment that she used, as flimsy as she sometimes allowed herself to acknowledge they were, as beams to support her steadfast worldview… Kirumi had more in common with the second Luminary son than she’d ever be happy to acknowledge.

One similarity being that she was so lost as to what to do with herself when she had no tasks or missions presented to her that she almost resented the free time, the quiet eating away at her in a way she constantly needed to move to fill. Her life was in service to the well being and happiness of others, and the only problem with that is that others seemed so determined to undermine her sense of purpose by never needing her enough.

Another similarity being she could spot an upset Kokichi a mile away, regardless of how well he was wearing whatever mask he had constructed for himself in the moment.

Kirumi knew that she was not meant to consider herself a ‘keeper’ of Kokchi’s anymore. This seemed foolish to her still, as the Dicean prince was both a person worthy of careful and diligent care and attention and protection, but also still, regardless of the changing views of the castle, someone who desperately needed that level of fussing over. Kirumi’s mouth thinned in displeasure as she saw Kokichi, out and about in town, on his own, upset… like he wasn’t an especially important resource and treasure of the Dicean people. Foolish. Where was Nazumi? Or Maki, even? That little assassin was at least supposed to be useful in her paranoia…

Sighing, Kirumi headed over to Kokichi. “Kokichi,” She said, the familiar name painting her tongue casually, but her lowered head and hands in front of her waist dipping in (a way she could never make stop) difference, “Good day. I see you are also enjoying the new summer sun. We seem to be heading the same direction. May I escort you?”

Kokichi hadn’t been head down, fighting back tears as he ran back home. He still waved to people who recognized him and kept his back straight, and his eyes were dry. But his smile was smaller and he didn’t stop to chat with anyone, and just...something about him seemed smaller. A little more distracted, but his thoughts were turned inward, rather than just blissfully enjoying the day.

As such, he startled a little when Kirumi was suddenly in front of him, though he recovered quickly with a smile and a nod in greeting. “Hello, Kirumi; yeah, I don’t mind, I’m just heading back home. I know everyone’s probably doing fine without me, but I’m a little anxious to get back in, you know?”

Falling into step with the taller woman, Kokichi tilted his head with a placid smile. “Did you have any fun plans in town? We should have tea together again sometime, it’s been a while.”

“I had no specific plans,” Kirumi admitted, smiling a little in sincere affection for the boy. “It is one of my designated days off, and I found myself wishing little more than to take a walk and see the sights. I find the heat trying in the coming months, but there is a true ease and relief in these first few weeks, shaking off the cold and watching the world light up in long, beautiful days.”

“Tea would be a delight. Perhaps you could invite Shuichi as well. He has been much more active lately, it has been delightful to see his swift recovery. Truly, a testament to the expertise of his medical team. You must be thrilled, I imagine.” Out of all the Luminaries, Shuichi still seemed the most likely to be truly civilized someday. There was hope for the young detective. Him and the child too, Kirumi expected. If only Timothy would stop carrying around that dagger with him. Tsk.

Kokichi nodded, smiling a little more as he related to Kirumi’s feelings. Once the heat waves started kicking in, Kokichi knew he’d be sick of the sun, but once the spring started to melt winter away, even when there were thunderstorms and strong winds, there was something so fresh about the world. Kokichi knew he just wanted to soak it up, so he could see the appeal in Kirumi’s walk.

“It’s wonderful, isn’t it,” he softly murmured, glancing around at the plants and trees, the light, blooming colors of spring in part behind them, but replaced by the vibrant greens of summer. Though, of course, there was always something blooming.

Kokichi’s smile quirked a little, doubting Shuuichi would be thrilled to take tea with Kirumi, and...his heart panged a little, knowing that...he should probably tell his partners about the store…

“I’ll be sure to ask him about it,” Kokichi softly promised before forcing his smile a little bigger, trying to reflect how he actually felt about Shuuichi’s recovery even if he couldn’t feel very thankful right now. “There was so much going on that I always tried to be positive, but now that Miyako’s birth is through and she and Shuu-chan are at home, it’s really relieving that everything went well. I know Shuu-chan’s particularly happy that the stairs don’t feel like death anymore. And that he can sleep on his back again,” he laughed softly, the sound a little stiff, but there all the same.

“I have never envied the trials of new births. While the process is necessary and no doubt quite rewarding to some, it is an awful long time to commit yourself to being perpetually uncomfortable, if not outright in pain.” Kirumi mused, though the thought of motherhood itself had always been something… in the back of her mind. Desirable, but… unattainable. Perhaps not realistically, but it felt that way. A lifestyle she was well suited for, in her own opinion, but out of her reach.

Kirumi’s eyes glanced, again, knowingly down at the boy, his shift in mood and discomfort obvious to her. Peoples discomfort was always obvious to Kirumi. She was keyed into those little tells in people, their body language sometimes screaming their needs to her.

(At least, that was how she had always rationalized it.)

“You seem troubled.” She said gently, “I hope I don’t overstep by acknowledging that you seem less than your usual light, bouncy self, Kokichi.”

Kokichi nodded. “Seeing Shuu-chan go through it right in front of me has made that all the more apparent. I’m glad the system of medical support is where it is, and I’m super thankful to our GP and OB, but I can’t help wishing there was more to be done to make it easier… I suppose that’s what grant money and research teams are for, though.”

It seemed like an inevitability that pregnancy would be uncomfortable and painful and a long investment, but...just because something had “always” been a certain way, that didn’t mean it always had to be that way. Things were always changing, new sciences and methods of thought were always being discovered and iterated upon. You should always be looking for the future to be brighter than the past.

Kokichi’s gaze had started to fall to the ground in front of him again before, well, Kirumi pointed it out. Smiling grimly, Kokichi doubted there was anything ‘bouncy’ about him right now.

“Nah, you’re alright,” Kokichi assured, before he sighed softly, running a hand through his hair to swipe his bangs away. “...I’ll be okay. I just...ran into someone I wasn’t expecting to see, and it caught me off-guard. Nothing big.”

“Really?” Kirumi said, frowning, “Forgive me for wishing to pry, but there are not that many people I can imagine it would displease you to see, and, admittedly, my mind immediately went to examples from your childhood. I should hope that one of those loons from the LRG didn’t think to approach you, now that you are out and about among people. You know if you bring it up to your father, the boss will ensure such things do not occur…”

Kokichi gave the older woman an appreciative smile but shook his head. “No, it wasn’t one of them. Ideally, I’d like to say they all disbanded after, yanno, all the public humiliation and ostracisation over the years, but you can’t keep people from having their own opinions, no matter how wild.”

“...it’s really not a big deal, though I appreciate you looking out for me,” he sighed. “Just...a friend I had a fight with. Not quite ready to talk it out yet so...I wasn’t really ready to see them yet.”

“Perhaps not, though I am a firm believer that some opinions should never be indulged to speak at all.” Kirumi huffed, turning up her nose. She was perfectly happy with the Dicean style of punishment for people, finding something almost delightfully long term about the practice. But-- and this was admittedly probably a Luminary folly in her thinking-- she saw no real reason why such punishments should ever be suffered to end. Once a pariah, forever a pariah. None of those idiots should ever dirty the Light of Dicea with any sort of pressure or expectations of acknowledgement. They did not deserve it.

“I am, always, happy to be of service, Kokichi.” Kirumi said, bowing her head slightly, “...admittedly, that is more difficult.” She said closing her eyes respectfully for a moment, “I am perhaps more willing to cut people from my willingness to engage with them than the average Dicean, but, if it was a friend? It can be trying, to meaningfully engage, or disengage, with someone I… once cared about. As it is for anyone, of course. Was this a recent argument?”

Kokichi shrugged a bit, not quite having it in him to debate semantics and fringe cases right now. On the whole, most opinions, even if they were hurtful or ignorant, had a space to be shared. It was in that space that they could be debated and molded through further knowledge and exposure to new perspectives. There were some opinions, though, that really didn’t deserve any space, and those were the kinds of opinions that led to violence against others, often a nebulously defined group of people.

Even if Kokichi was one person, the LRG had done so much damage to so many people that they were classified under that sort of group in need of eradication, though people could certainly harbor worries or distaste over the idea of nepotistic legacies in positions of power. There was a line, and the government was tasked with parsing every individual case.

But Nao, despite her knowledge, hadn’t been an active part of that violence, and had in fact been instrumental in deconstructing it. And that all had been decades ago.

Kokichi averted his eyes and pouted a bit as Kirumi gave him some genuine advice. Or was leading to it. “...not really. But it was recent considering the span of time we’ve known each other.”

He sighed, curling into himself a bit. “...I know I can’t just keep off processing my own feelings, but...I think I’m gonna stand behind the fact that having a kid is a pretty big thing to focus on instead.”

At this, Kirumi laughed gently. Not trying to be cruel or dismissive to the young prince, but… “If you’re waiting for opportunity to feel your feelings, I’m sorry to inform you life has a decidedly terrible habit of not pausing on anyone’s schedule. You’ll either have to make time for it yourself or prioritize something else as worthy of that sacrifice…”

Tipping her head slightly, Kirumi considered her own words, before amending, “Perhaps I am biased, though. I felt quite busy in the moment, but upon reflection, my time on the front lines gave me ample opportunity to sit with my own thoughts and contemplations. Time to ‘feel my feelings’, as it were. There is something soothing, to have nothing to actively do while in the middle of a truly important task. Your boredom and lethargy feels… purposeful. Earned. Sitting within yourself for hours at a time feels like a requirement, rather than a vice. Keeping watch for spies and enemies and animals and fires… I suppose that is life giving time to process. In its own way.”

“I imagine there will be time, watching over your daughter, where your careful parenting will simply mean you sitting quietly with yourself for long periods of time. That would be ample time to do it, I imagine. Though, as the heir-apparent, I feel I should remind you and reassure you that your partners have a responsibility to lessen that impact on you that you should be quick to utilize. Luminaries can be decidedly stubborn and aggressive in their thoughts and mannerisms, but much of that is showmanship and bravado. Do not let them burden you with a majority of the workload. Go to the boss if they make it difficult… he will have a word with and correct them, I’m certain.”

Every time Kirumi mentioned Aiichi, there was such an… awe. In her tone. A lightness in her gaze. As if the very mention of him or idle thought about him brought her incomparable joy.

Kokichi sighed, knowing the truth in that too. The world wasn’t going to just stop and let him try to untangle the knot of Nao in his chest. Really, he’d had ample down time to try and think about it over the past nine months and...he just hadn’t. Had worked on other things or had just enjoyed having nothing urgent pulling at him. And those things were important! But...he’d always just put it off. Maybe it was his stubborn way of trying to personally punish her, even if it was hurting him more.

He just...how was he even supposed to get through it? It didn’t feel right to want to make amends with your boyfriend’s abuser… He didn’t know how he was supposed to find personal peace either.

Kokichi looked up, listening to Kirumi speak of her time at war. Kokichi probably heard more of it than the average person, even people listening to loved ones confiding in them, but...it was still rare to hear someone say...pretty much anything with substance about it. Even to the point of saying that there was purposeful downtime.

...it wasn’t that Kokichi didn’t actually have the time…

Huffing a laugh, Kokichi shook his head a little. “If anything, the opposite happens. Kai-chan was just...convinced for a while that he’d be the sole person getting up in the middle of the night when Miya starts to fuss. He wants so much to make things painless and easy on me and Shuu-chan that sometimes it’s like he’s trying to take on the world.”

“Really,” Kokichi snorted. “I think the last conversation I’d ever hear would be my father asking Kai-chan to spend more time with the kids. From both sides.”

Kirumi kept the distaste off her face, that old hatred returning. The second Luminary prince playing himself up, no doubt. She had heard the stories of how he had grown, after she left. Friends with Indentured’s, not involved in the politics, hanging out in pubs and whoring himself out to anyone who would have him… a man desperately trying to hide from the world his innate ugliness. His poison. There had been a real part of Kirumi who had really, really hoped that Dicea would finally give the royal son what was coming to him. Finally put him in his place, tear him down and isolate him until he was hopeless, friendless and with no bright future ahead of him…

But her good Byakuya had sent friends with him… such a good child. And of course Kokichi himself, the ever present light he was, had refused to condemn his husband as well. Pity.

Her mind on the good deeds of those she respected, Kirumi’s gaze softened as she said gently, “You know… your father was truly the first person I ever got to know, once I…” she hesitated, before amending, “After a difficult period of time in my life, where I found myself without many relationships. I had come to Usott when you were a mere toddler, trying to find a new start in life, and I wished for a placement that suited my skillset, so I went to work as a housekeeper for the castle. And… I was so astounded, by the love the boss had for his child. For you.”

“You were so… challenged.” She said softly, shaking her head, “Sickly. Easy to damage. And, of course, everyone had opinions but no actual answers for how to safely raise you. And your poor father was left to carve a path out for you on his own. He was so dedicated to you… coordinating new healers, esteemed and specialized, to come see you all the time. Ensuring the staff handled you with such care. Dealing, over and over and over again, with the threats and violence against you… he was diligent. Endlessly diligent, even when people tried to dissuade him or mocked him or would try to trick him. He never gave up fighting for you… witnessing his care for you cemented my choice to come to Usott. To fight for Dicea. Who better to risk dying for, than a man like that? Incredible…”

Kokichi glanced over at Kirumi, his back prickling. He knew she disliked Kaito, and as much as that saddened him, it was an opinion that could be allowed to stand. People didn’t have to be friends, but they had to tolerate each other, and Kirumi did.

...but Kaito was still his beloved husband, and Kokichi would still defend him to people that disliked him, even if their opinions didn’t change.

(But...geez. Kirumi did have sensible wisdom for some things, but she was just...completely twisted around when it came to Kaito and Byakuya. Eugh.)

Before Kokichi could (mind read by accident again) speak, though, Kirumi started on another subject, and...while Kokichi had conflicted feelings there too…

Kokichi sighed, his shoulders falling. “...Dicea is wonderful. It, and its people, are worth loving. Worth living for. Worth protecting. And my father is a part of that.”

“...I was already so overwhelmed when Miya was born--I can’t imagine how...how it was for Aiichi. How heart-breaking...how miraculous...how devastating. And then to keep doing everything he did to help me as I grew up…” Kokichi sighed again, eyes tired but...at peace. “He made mistakes, and ones I resented for a long time. Ones that left scars that aren’t really going to ever fade, even after I’ve long-since learned how to accept them. Mistakes than even in the uncharted territory he was in I think were avoidable, and a few I think are unacceptable. But my father is human like any other, and he was trying out of his love for me. And...that’s really amazing. It’s a type of love, the love to keep trying over and over even if you tumble and fall and destroy, that I can see in our country. And I love it too.”

Gently, Kokichi leaned to press his shoulder briefly to Kirumi’s arm. “I’m glad that you’ve gotten that love too. And that you chose to use it in return. It’s really something special...even if I can see it in a lot of places.”

Kirumi smiled at that, feeling both affectionate and amused. Kokichi was still so young, really. It was hard not to see the child still she had left behind for the war, but even taking into account his age, he was young. Still taking his teenage rebellion phase so seriously… Kirumi was certain that time would take even the lingering resentment out of the young royal charge. That time and maturity and being a parent himself would cement Aiichi’s place as a good parent in the boys reflections.

Relationships between children and their parents seemed so… difficult. In some ways, Kirumi supposed she was lucky to have avoided the whole messy strain of it in her own childhood. The indentured program hadn’t left her with a lot of fond memories, but at least when her own time of rebellion (finally) came, she hadn’t been misguided in her rage.

Gently, she placed her hands in front of her waist, and said, “I can too. But it is still a special thing to see. We are very lucky, to live in such a place…”

It still wasn’t Katio’s turn on baby duty, but Timothy duty was done, Kaito having playing soccer with the kids for awhile before… well, admittedly, he had gotten tired, needing to bow out to Cali, his teammates, outrage.

The girls would be leaving for camp soon. A couple of days. More than ever, seeing their time limit coming up, Kaito wished he had insisted Timothy go to camp with one of them. What was his kid going to do all by himself for over a month…

Anyway. It was that time of month.

Carefully, a habit he had started recently to lessen cleanup issues, Kaito took off his shirt, pants, and his two rings. Placing his wedding ring and green lantern ring over at the corner of the table, getting the bandages and hand towels ready, setting up the bowl, cleaning his knife real quick.

Kaito winced when he sliced at himself, just a little, at the side of his arm. It wouldn’t be a lot of blood, but Kaito was just doing his best to be more careful these days. Kokichi had seen him bleed too much. He didn’t want to burden his husband with this anymore than he already had too.

As he let the few drops of blood fall into the bowl, Kaito started murmuring his usual prayer. He wasn’t sure when he’d stop praying for the dead, but… it still felt like something he had to do for now. Murmuring their names, almost a little dead-eyed about it now. A chore rather than true grief.

Wrapping up and cleaning his arm, Kaito then put his clothes back on, his rings back on, covered up the blood bowl, and flumped back down onto his bean bag. “...” Kaito wracked his brain for what to talk to Atua about. Not for lack of things to say, but just… he was kinda tired…

“... nothing big since Shuichi’s panic attack.” Kaito told Atua, sighing, “So, that’s good. Um… I was re-looking it up in the baby books last night? Miyako won’t start smiling or laughing for, fuck, at least twelve weeks… I was feeling kinda insecure. She always looks so upset, but… that’s just infant face. I was kinda worried I was doing something wrong though, so I wanted to double check. And…” Kaito laughed at himself, “I kinda just want to skip to the part where Miyako likes me a little bit. Books said to wait a few months on that one. But I want it nooooooow… man, I’m pathetic…”

Kaito was feeling a little discouraged today. Just worn down.

Shuichi had been acting weird lately.

“My handsome guy has… something on his mind, I think.” Kaito mused, running his hand over his face, “I dunno what, but he does. He and Maki are whispering at each other all the time. Talking about something specific, I think… heh… maybe they’re not. Maybe I’m just being weird and sensitive…”

“...and if not, what does it matter?” Kaito muttered, “What? They conspiring to skill some of my family again? Hah! Jokes on them. I don’t care… too little too late, Maki! Shoulda killed them when it’d destroy me! Hah! I’m invincible!”

Kaito frowned, crooking his mouth… before going, “Blegh. Stupid. I’m just whining about old shit now… I’m tired and whiiiiiiiny, Atua! Augh!” Kaito groaned, laughing as he put his arms over his face, just endlessly bemused at himself. “This is what happens when you let me do all the talking all the time. End up bitching about old things. How are things with you, Atua?”

Kaito listened to nothing. Staring vacantly at the ceiling.

“Cool, cool… Kohtalon? How’s my favorite dead horse? ...don’t tell the other horse… oh man, I wonder if I should have found out that horses name? Maybe not. Seems kinda like a self-indulgent sorta self-pitying punishment. I find out that horses name was like… Marshmallow or something. Woe is me! Brought the valiant and good Marshmallow low! Cut in the prime of his horsey life!”

“...I’m an asshole.” Kaito muttered. “Man, at least everyone else gets breaks from me. Wish I could…”

“...hope everyone’s trials are going well. Hey, Atua? Is dad getting punished for the weird, like, sex stuff? Could you?? Make sure he does?? Cause I swear, if I go to the paradise and he doesn’t fucking see what the fuck was wrong with that, I’m decking him. I don’t care if I’m thrown back into my trials, it’s happening.”

“...I bet there was more to his letter.” Kaito grumbled, turning onto his side and glaring at the wall, “I bet there was. Byakuya was just trying to hurt me. I bet he said he was proud or… something… I earned it. I earned it… Byakuya just doesn’t want to tell me…”

“...did embarrass mom a lot anyway. Not that weird she’d mention it. Probably wasn’t pages. Fucking asshole… couldn’t just let me have one thing. Just wanted to hear they were proud of me. That’s all. But nooooo, didn’t benefit Byakuya in any way, so why should Kaito get some parental approval for once. Stupid… fucking asshole… hope his kid kills him. Ha! That’d show him…”

Kaito glared at the wall, before huffing. Dumb. That was a dumb thought… but, whatever. Kaito was allowed. What? Someone gonna punish him for his random, self-indulgent thoughts? Whatever…

“...she doesn’t look like a plant.” Maki observed, as she and Shuichi peered into the crib.

“Right? I was looking her over after our last feeding, and I swear… an entirely normal little baby. Where is the plantiness? There should be something, shouldn’t there?”

“Maybe she’ll develop cool plant things later in life? Could be something she grows into.”

“Cool plant things?” Shuichi asked Maki incredulously. “Like what?”

“Vines.” Maki said, eyes lighting up a little, “That she can use as lasso’s or whips.”

“Really?”

“Thorns?”

“Don’t wish thorns on my daughter, Maki.”

“That thing where plants produce certain smells to control other people… pheromones or whatever. That would be cool.”

“She’s already an empath, she doesn’t need any more mind control things.”

“Debatable.”

Kokichi knocked softly on the door before quietly slipping in, smiling at Shuuichi and Maki as he toed his shoes off. He wasn’t even, like, minutes before his shift--they’d have to discuss the new hours they wanted to do since Shuuichi was feeling better--but...he was tired. As nice as...most of walking around town was, Kokichi just wanted to be with his family.

Wiggling forward across their bed, lying on his stomach but wanting to be near and facing his friends, Kokichi propped up his chin in his hands, hoping that he looked less...down, after his conversation and walk back with Kirumi.

“Heyyyyy…” Kokichi softly chimed. “How’s it been? Oh, and, Shuu-chan, Kirumi extended an invitation to ya to have tea with us sometime.”

“Oh. Uh. I think I’d be busy around then.” Shuichi said, glancing up at Kokichi with a raised eyebrow, “I’ll catch her next time.”

“Could you imagine Kirumi as a baby?” Maki asked, tapping her toe gently against the ground as she continued to look for signs of plant’iness on Miyako. Nope. Just perpetually sleepy babyness instead. “Looking at her, thinking how cute she was, imagining her potential and future… what a disappointment.”

“Maki, that’s a little harsh…” Shuichi frowned, remembering Kirumi in his childhood, before chuckling, “Though not inaccurate.”

“Don’t grow up to be Kirumi, Miyako. You’ll endlessly disappoint us.” Maki tsked. “If you’re going to grow up crazy, at least be a fun and endearing kind of crazy.”

“Maki… though she’s right, Miyako. I can’t support your life choices if you grow up a Kirumi type. We’d have to have a serious conversation.” Shuichi gravely told his infant daughter.

Miyako yawned in her sleep. “Awww.” the two ex-indentured’s gushed.

Kokichi snorted softly and nodded, having completely expected the answer. “Sure, sure. You are a busy guy, after all, can’t expect ya to always be free. She’ll understand.”

As Maki spoke her hypothetical--or just odd observation--Kokichi followed her gaze over to Miya’s crib, his gaze softening. He didn’t believe Kirumi quite deserved that kind of harshness, but just like her dislike of Kaito, Maki and Shuuichi’s dislike and dismissal of her were valid opinions. And, perhaps too bad for Kirumi, Kokichi didn’t feel the impetus to defend her.

He didn’t want Miya to grow up like her either. Though...most of that came from the fact that Kokichi didn’t want his daughter to grow up in slavery, and have to resort to high-levels of violence to get out and...still have that weighing around her, even after finding a new life.

Kokichi smiled as Miya yawned, his lips tilting up even more from Maki and Shuuichi’s reactions, but...soon, it fell, and he rested his head on his arms.

“...can I...talk to you guys about something that happened today?”

“No.” Maki said.

“How dare you.” Shuichi said just as quickly.

“Outrageous.”

“Where does he get off?”

“I don’t know, he’s your boyfriend.”

“I can’t take responsibility for behavior like that.”

“We could blame Kaito?”

“That works.” Shuichi said, giving Miyako another fond look, before heading over to the bed. Honestly, he had been in a pretty good mood lately, all things considered. His body didn’t really hurt anymore, and as serious as things were, they were so… borderline ludicrous in their fantacism that Shuichi spent most of his time just making fun of it a little. Because it was kinda worthy of making fun of.

Maki helped with that. Honestly, she had been a rock these last couple of days. She hadn’t so much as blinked funny, when Shuichi had explained the Flora situation. She had just suddenly had a bunch of dry observations and jokes about how to raise a plant. It had been… incredibly reassuring, honestly. Maki’s ease and comfort a welcome relief.

Maki went to open the window-- changing time had been recent, the room needed airing out-- as Shuichi went to sit next to Kokichi, leaning over to kiss his cheek before saying softly, “We’re kidding. Is everything alright, Kokichi?”

Kokichi snorted as his friends dryly went off on him, and for as much as...he wasn’t exactly in the mood for it, it was really nice to see them like that again. Any time that Shuuichi and Maki could be goobers together, it made Kokichi feel like things were going to be alright. No matter what, they were family, and they were determined to see things through together.

Cuddling closer to Shuuichi when he sat on the couch, Kokichi sighed and opened his mouth, before hesitating. “...well… This isn’t… This happened before, but I ran into my friend Kerry at this occult shop? The shop didn’t have the book, as...I mean, you can tell that nowhere had it, since I didn’t come in with it, but they mentioned that the Traveling Curiosity Market is around and they offered to keep an eye out for it when they go tonight so...Kerry might be stopping by later, or tomorrow. So ya know.”

Kokichi pressed his cheek against Shuuichi’s thigh, gaze going outward. “...but, after that, I thought I’d check in on this craft shop, ‘cause I had planned on going anyway, and…”

“...I ran into Nao.”

There was a silence. Heavy and oppressive.

Maki went to grab the desk chair, deciding to settle in it as she crossed her arms and legs, looking between Kokichi and Shuichi, before focusing her gaze on Shuichi. He seemed… honestly? The only word that came to mind for her was just ‘defeated’. Just a sudden, tired, resigned look of acceptance. Maybe not for the incident in question, but for the fact that this was where the conversation had turned.

When Shuichi didn’t say anything for a while, Maki mused, “Kaito and I were talking about her just the other day. Funny how that works. Did she give you any trouble, Kokichi?”

“No,” Kokichi said softly. He knew he hadn’t...been the most mature. Or healthy. And he figured his friends would point out some of what Kirumi had, but with more emphasis on just letting go of Nao completely, but…

…

Kokichi swallowed. “No, she wasn’t...she didn’t do anything. She was just at the store. Seemed surprised to see me. And I left.”

Maki nodded at that, more or less at ease with the thought. Nao was dangerous, but, honestly, not to Kokichi. Maki would be more fidgety and alarmed if she had approached, or been seen by, Shuichi or Kaito. Or even Miyako. Danger-assessment wise though, Kokichi was in little to no real danger from the domineering woman.

Her tactics only worked on people who were genuinely afraid of the people around them, who would hesitate to go find help and try to handle the problem themselves. Shuichi and Kaito would still fall for her bullshit as they were now, Maki was certain, so that was more alarming. But Kokichi seemed to be more or less over his ‘don’t go for help’ phase. If Nao tried something on him, Maki felt confident he’d report her, or go to Nazumi for help, or maybe even Maki or Aiichi or Ikou. Not much danger there.

And she wouldn’t want Nao approaching Miyako because that was Shuichi’s daughter, fuck off.

But yeah, otherwise, Maki wasn’t worried… more just a little sad for the two now, Shuichi pulling away from Kokichi a little.

“...did she seem alright?” Shuichi asked quietly, “I mean… I don’t know… how did she seem?”

Kokichi missed Shuuichi’s contact, but he didn’t shift to try and restore it. If Shuuichi needed space, he would respect that… He knew it was important to be open with his family about things like this, and trying to hide what had happened was dumb as hell. But...he still felt bad for putting this on Shuuichi. Ruining his day with shitty memories.

“...small,” Kokichi said bluntly, his face more in their top blanket now than in his arms or against Shuuichi. “Tired. She kinda looked like shit, honestly, but I think I probably just caught her on a bad day than…” Kokichi shrugged. Than her just perpetually being miserable since she left their lives. Things just...didn’t work that way.

...but the curl of her shoulders and slump of her posture wasn’t something that was a day-by-day thing. That sort of presence was the formation of habit over a long time.

Guilt flashed through Shuichi’s face. On habit, he took out his journal, but… he was just holding it more than anything. Looking down at its simple, sturdy black design. Tapping the cover with his thumb.

“... did you…” Shuichi frowned, brow furrowed, “...get any sort of… feeling about her? Like, maybe… some sort of impression of… like something beyond what she physically looked like? Maybe?”

Maki sighed. Oh. Shuichi…

Kokichi glanced up at Shuuichi, now wanting to reach out for Shuuichi’s comfort rather than his own this time. Shuuichi had said he felt bad for ruining her life, even if everyone assured him that it was her own actions that did that. It was just...a mess.

Sighing, Kokichi shrugged a little. “...I dunno. I barely looked at her. I just...saw her for a fuckin’ second and left. I just...wanted to come home.”

(...she had seemed sad. Surprised and longing and guilty and...really sad.)

(The same feeling he had, of having lost something that meant so much to them.)

Shuichi nodded, both a little disappointed and a little self-chastising for his disappointment. His partner’s abilities weren’t… a tool Shuichi could use for his own convenience. Especially not while Kokichi couldn’t actually comprehend what he was capable of. He had been overstepping to even ask…

“...” Shuichi sighed, giving Kokichi a soft look. “Are you okay?”

Kokichi was quiet for a good few moments before his eyes started to burn, and he pressed himself more into their mattress, craving the sensation of being held. “...not yet.”

Shuichi frowned at the reddening he saw in Kokichi’s gaze, and feeling another cold flash of guilt, reached over to put his arm around Kokichi, just holding it for a moment before, in a moment of boldness, adjusting him to be laying his head on Shuichi’s lap. Petting through his hair as he said softly, “...I’m sorry…”

“...maybe…” Shuichi frowned, conflicted. Barely able to comprehend his own feelings on this, honestly. “...maybe you should go see her? We… we don’t have to tell Kaito… Nazumi could go with you… Maki?”

Maki raised an eyebrow. “Yes?”

“...what do you think?” Shuichi said, something desperate in the question. Maki, sometimes, seemed like she always knew what to do when it came to things like this. Like she’d not only have good advice, but the only solid or rational argument, when it came to… complicated subjects like this. Able to face the problem without blinking or being dissuaded.

And maybe that was still true. Because Maki didn’t so much as hesitate as she said, “I don’t know. That’s something you all have to work out yourselves. She’s not likely to attack him, if that’s what you’re asking.”

Kokichi sniffled as Shuuichi drew him close, and he curled around his boyfriend, taking in his warmth and the pressure that came with being close to someone. ...the fingers in his hair felt nice.

Pawing at his nose, not wanting to drip snot on Shuuichi when he’d so generously offered up his lap, Kokichi nodded sadly to Maki’s rightful point. “...I’m not ready to see her… I wasn’t today and...I won’t be for a while. I don’t even know what I’d want from her…”

Letting out a puff of air, Kokichi scrunched his wet eyes shut. “...I’ve put off trying to answer those questions for myself. I just...haven’t dealt with her at all. Because it hurts, and she hurt you too...hurt all of us. And it was so much easier trying to sort through all the other shit I need to…”

“A-and I know things like this take time, but...it’s been months and I haven’t processed anything. And now, the prospect of starting feels impossibly hard…”

There was a little choked noise in the back of Kokichi’s throat as he pressed himself more into Shuuichi’s lap. “Why’d she have to do it?”

Shuichi winced at that. His shoulders falling, again, just… not sure how to feel. Or what to say. Of what he was allowed to feel or say, cause…

“I don’t know.” Shuichi said softly, “I didn’t know her. I couldn’t guess.”

Running his hands through Kokichi’s hair, Shuichi said softly, “I know… she was clumsy. She did all these big craft things, building stages and sets, and she covered herself in bruises and cuts doing it. So… pretty clumsy, I suppose?”

And then, maybe in a moment of inspiration, Shuichi looked down at Kokichi and asked, “Was she? Is she? Clumsy?”

Because Nao was a bizarre, strange, terrifying monster to Shuichi, who didn’t know what to do with that, and to Kokichi, she was an eccentric aunt who had inexplicably done something Kokichi couldn’t comprehend, and Kokichi didn’t seem to know what to do with that. So… maybe they could fill in the blanks for each other.

Kokichi sniffled again and hunched his shoulders, one of his hands reaching out to hold some of the loose fabric of Shuuichi’s shirt, just...needing to hold on to something. Still feeling as furious and gutted and adrift about Nao as he had a month after everything.

“...not particularly…” Kokichi murmured, his voice wavering. “Some injuries were...inevitable, I guess, just from doing so - so many projects, ‘n working with big, heavy materials and tools… Lot of her injuries came from people, though. A-always more when the haunted house was running… But during tests, too. People more inclined to punch and shove than freeze or run away…”

There was a wet sound at the back of his throat. “...didn’t find out for years… She - she would always just tell people there was an accident in the workshop, you know? B-but I overheard R-ryouhei trying to send her back home after she came into work with a broken rib once…”

“Oh~” Shuichi said softly, somehow… almost amused that one of the first and only things Nao had ever told him was essentially a lie. Not a malicious one. Just a lie. That… that tracked, really. “... maybe it just felt normal to her, then? Maybe she went so hard so fast because that was normal to her…”

What else did he ‘know’ about her? Let's see… “She… I guess she has an open relationship with her wife? She… she is very sexually active. She had a bag of sexual items she kept at work. I don’t… know if she brought them to work specifically with everything that happened in mind, or if it had just been a coincidence? I really don’t know how impulsive or planned out any of it was. It had to have been impulsive, right? She couldn’t have guessed I’d be in the library that day…”

Kokichi squeezed his eyes shut and shrugged. He really...couldn’t understand how she had thought any of that was okay. He knew she wasn’t just incapable of being gentle and caring. She had never treated him like he was made of glass, and Nao had consistently given Kokichi more credit than others had while he was growing up, but none of that ever translated into her being rough. Not even close to cruel or careless.

He didn’t understand why...why she had just become a monster when it came to Shuuichi…

Kokichi pressed his forehead against Shuuichi’s leg, shrugging again. “...I don’t know… We didn’t exactly talk about her sex life. Yasu is...she’s sex-repulsed asexual, and...so, yeah, they had an open relationship. Yasu was the only romantic partner Nao had, but her sexual partners was...an open thing…”

“...I don’t know… I don’t know. She was always observing people… Her journal is full of observations. She liked seeing how people worked...she used to be focused on how people reacted to fear, but...she told me that seeing everything else...happiness a-and passion and boredom...all of it was beautiful too… You needed it all to get a full picture of what a person was actually like.”

“Did she have a journal?” Shuichi asked, again, a bit… bemused. Maki watched quietly the sort of deadened, resigned humor in his face, and decided to just keep quietly observing, Kokichi seeming to be okay venting and Shuichi not reacting… overwhelmed, anyway, as he mused, “We’re weirdly alike, maybe. At least from the few things I’ve gathered. She took my journal for a few days. Seiko had to make her give it back.”

Shuichi frowned, those blurry memories not entirely reliable, as he said, “... I think it was an accident? I’m not sure why I think that, but I got the impression she meant to give it back and forgot. It didn’t feel like it at the time, because she seemed so… bigger than life. To me. But honestly, I think she might have just been careless a lot. I don’t know if she was thinking any of it through… she took a lot of risks that seem kind of insane to me now. If Hajime hadn’t found me? You all would have known what was going on the first day. She just sorta… left me for you guys to find. In hindsight, it kinda feels like she thought it wasn’t a big deal…”

Shuichi wasn’t sure what he was trying to argue, or even if he was making an argument at all. It just sorta felt like… well, he was honestly just more taking the opportunity to rationalize now. Or understand. Or whatever. He didn’t know. Nao seemed careless in hindsight.

A weird sort of strangled sob made its way from Kokichi’s throat as he turned his head more into Shuuichi’s lap. Strong enough that it took him a few moments to wrest words from his vocal chords again. “...I thought...I thought you guys might be friends, one d-day…” he whimpered. “What I knew then… I really thought you’d get along…”

And instead of being an ally, a new friend in a scary place where Kokichi’s family had barely interacted with anyone for so long...she had become Shuuichi’s personal nightmare. Kokichi had hopes. Nao had been such a comforting person to him, growing up! Why couldn’t she have...why did she have to…

A growl ripped from Kokichi’s throat as he cried into Shuuichi’s lap, his shoulders shaking from the force of it. “She’s so fucking stupid! Tha-that’s so dumb!”

Shuichi sighed, still soothingly running one hand through Kokichi’s hair, gently scratching his scalp, while his other hand just hugged him, pressing into his back, not as hard as Kaito might have, his gentle presses more just affectionate than a small, easing massage, but… just wanting to be there for his boyfriend for a moment. Letting Kokichi shake in his lap for a moment, uninterrupted.

Shuichi glanced up at Maki, looking to her for support, and she gave him a small, softly tired look in return. The look was gentle enough to be supportive, but Maki was still tellingly silent. She didn’t have any good advice or knowledge to share about something like this. Not anything either of them could use. Nao didn’t exactly have a kingdom they could obsessively try to topple in revenge.

After a bit, Shuichi said softly, “Maybe that’s just all it was? Maybe it hadn’t been massively calculated and pointedly cruel or some big, nefarious plan on her part… maybe Nao’s just a little bit stupid and got caught up? It… it doesn’t really make it better. But… I mean, I can’t say I haven't done similar things. Or Maki, or Kaito, or even you, really, Kokichi… we all get caught up in these little awful patterns that get worse the more we try to fix it. Usually the only thing that breaks us out of the cycle is one of us noticing it's happening and stopping each other, and…” Shuichi shrugged, “I dunno. Maybe Nao doesn’t have anyone in her life like that. Or, at least not at the castle. So it just got worse and worse…”

“... I don’t know why I want to defend her so much,” Shuichi admitted, “It’s stuff like this that gets Kaito losing his mind, and I can understand that, sometimes. Her doing it by accident or maybe not understanding the full scope of what was happening doesn’t really make it better… maybe I just… I don’t know, maybe it’s a lot of things. Maybe I see a version of myself that could have done the same thing in the same circumstances? Or maybe a part of me is worried that the things I did led to it getting as bad as it got, like I manipulated her into it… I mean, me on the pollen, I really could have done that…” Shuichi suddenly laughed slightly. Looking tired, “Or maybe my pride just wants Nao to be a normal person fumbling through this rather than, I don’t know… the more depressing answers, like she was a mastermind and it was the only possible way, or that she was just… kinda… into it. Because that’s kind of a depressing thought, really…”

Maki thought that was interesting. She knew for a fact Kaito preferred to think of the enemies in his life as incredibly intelligent people with specific plans. She guessed Kaito preferred his villains masterminds he had stood no chance against. She was a little surprised Shuichi preferred to think they were just stupid… though maybe that thought eased his ego a little. Not outsmarted, just overwhelmed by bumbling stupidity and brute strength.

Kokichi let himself cry for a bit, his tears hot as they fell in anger. Nao was someone who could’ve done so much better and...and she’d just fucked the whole thing up at every opportunity! Failed spectacularly. And it was infuriating because he knew that she did have other options she was capable of. And she just didn’t choose them. Or manage them. Or whatever, but no classification made it any better.

What would’ve happened? If Ryouhei knew, if Yasu knew more, if Seiko hadn’t been a coward. Doctors were supposed to stand up for their patients, not be paralyzed with indecision, thinking that your patient would kill themself or their family would kill you. Yasu was the person that Nao tried to be better for, and...they had just been disengaged enough for neither of them to get uncomfortable and see how dumb and senselessly violent everything had gotten. Ryouhei held Nao accountable but...he wasn’t her babysitter, he shouldn’t have to follow her around all the time and make sure she wasn’t being an idiot. She was a grown woman in her thirties… Kokichi knew that people didn’t magically stop being stupid at any age, but she should’ve had the experience to stop and thing for a fucking second!

It was careless… It was careless, and Shuuichi had been hurt so badly…

Kokichi huffed wetly, his tears calming at least a little. “...some of me wishes I wanted to defend her… But she’s just not worth it… Making a mistake that fucking big… That hurt you so much. And...like...failing every opportunity to turn things around… Maybe she has already, but...she needs to prove that she’s learned and changed a lot before I can even start feeling like she’s worth putting work in for… And it sucks...because I want to. But I can’t.”

Shuichi… nodded at that a little. He didn’t really know what Kokichi meant by all of that. Or, in the sense, Shuichi got the impression that ‘self-improvement’ felt more definable to Diceans, than Shuichi had grown up thinking of the idea. He felt like Nao had some sort of… finish line, or progress bar, that her fellow Diceans would be expecting her to run towards, and Shuichi had no concept of what that sort of progress and journey actually looked like. How was he supposed to know when she was close to done? Or making real strides? Was it a...milestone thing? A time-based thing? Was it written down somewhere, or did everyone here just collectively know when she was done?

What happened after it was over?

Shuichi felt a little out of step with this part. Luminary practices were impossible here, and he didn’t quite understand Dicean practices, and all he really wanted was for everything to be okay. He wanted to not feel sad and dirty and small. He wanted Kokichi to be happy. He… kind of wanted Nao to be happy. He still wasn’t sure if she had even meant to hurt him. Not really. She might have done all of that because she had really, genuinely thought it was the best idea, and she was kind of stupid and out of her depth.

Maybe that was what it was.

Maybe Shuichi just wanted to know for certain if there was anything to really be angry over. If he was even in the right to feel the way he did. Everything had been so crazy and strange and bizarre… it might not have even been Nao’s fault. He didn’t know.

Shuichi made a decision in that moment… but it wasn’t one he wanted to force on his boyfriend, who seemed to have made up his mind on a different way forward. So instead, he said softly, “You don’t have too. You knew Nao… in a way? That’s almost worse. You were close to her… I remember how furious I was, when I heard about what Kaito did to you. How conflicted and pissed and hurt I was. In that sense? I can understand… and no one can tell you how you’re supposed to feel about it. I’m still just sorry it all happened, is all…”

Kokichi huffed...and calmed after a moment. “...me too. None of that should’ve happened to you. The pollen, Nao, the brewery...none of it.”

Pulling back slightly, Kokichi sat himself up a bit and wiped his face on the back of his arm before coming forward and hugging Shuuichi. It wasn’t bone-crushing--even if Shuuichi was doing better these days, Kokichi was still aware not to put pressure on his middle--but Kokichi tucked his face against Shuuichi’s shoulder and just held his boyfriend for a bit. “I’m sorry…”

“You don’t have to be.” Shuichi said softly, holding Kokichi back, “This is hard and confusing and weird on all of us. At least it’s not something we’re ever likely going to have to do again?”

Shuichi looked at Maki. “...what?” Maki asked, looking genuinely confused, “No? You won’t? I’m a pessimist, and even I think this is likely a one and done sort of situation.”

Shuichi huffed slightly at that, “You are not a pessimist. I’m a pessimist. You’re an optimist.”

“What??”

“We’ll argue about it later.” Shuichi sighed, shaking his head at her a little-- pessimist? She was so unselfaware.-- before returning his attention to Kokichi, holding him tight as he said, “And… maybe someday we’ll really know how to handle this? It will all click, someday, and we’ll just… know better. And things will be better. And… I don’t know if Nao will ever be a part of your life again… but…”

Shuichi frowned, before committing to it, “If you do ever want that? Don’t feel like it’ll be a betrayal to me. I’m still working out my own feelings on everything that happened, but I don’t want that to keep you from getting closure, if the opportunity shows up. I know she was a different person to you than she was to me… no matter what else was true? I understand that. I’m… okay with that.”

“Fuck, I hope not…” Kokichi mumbled into Shuuichi’s shoulder. Once was far more than enough. No one needed another foreign drug epidemic, let alone for a loved one to be a victim of it, manage to hide it for ages, and then be abused by another loved one who thought they had a handle on things. The fact that it happened once was absurd.

...she really had been. Someone Kokichi loved. She was gone before he started to reconcile with his family, but...he had. If she hadn’t botched everything up so badly, she would’ve been right there with the rest of his family. She had been family…

Kokichi sighed, feeling another wave of tears well up on him, but he didn’t have the energy to start sobbing again. “...thanks. It’s… It’s gonna be a while before I even wanna look at her again. But…”

He curled in more around Shuuichi. “...I dunno if you heard, while Kai-chan and I were arguing… It took me years to come around to...to Katsuki-chan and Waku-chan and the others… To start letting them prove themselves. It’s different, ‘cause I knew her before, but… I need time…”

Shuichi just nodded at this. Understandable… “Okay, Kokichi.” He said, “Take all the time you need. Either way… it’s okay.”

It was Kaito’s turn, and… he wasn’t actually sure where his partners were?

It was mid-afternoon, and after eating lunch, everyone else had headed out. He was pretty sure Shuichi and Maki had been thinking about going out to walk the town a bit, which maybe Kokichi went with them? Or maybe they were hanging out in Shuichi’s study, petting the snake. Or Maki’s room? Maki had idly started talking about training Kokichi in knife throwing again, though Kaito wasn’t sure how seriously she was talking about it.

He knew all the places they could have gone, but had forgotten to ask where everyone was actually going before they left, and it was now a few hours later as Kaito pondered to Miyako, “Do you think they’d have gone to the hot tub?”

He had been asking Miyako a few places they could have gone, as he undressed her and placed her on the small table they kept in the bathroom, softly matted but practical for the job of easy cleaning after cleaning little babies themselves. As he had prepared the wipes, towel, sponges, the bucket of warm water with a cup next to it, and of course, a new diaper waiting. Kaito was sitting on the bathroom tile, the table laid out on the ground in front of him, all the supplies to either side, taking his time with the initial wiping down as he said to her, “See, a hot tub is sorta like the bucket, Miya. And that over there?”

Kaito nodded his head towards the tub, which Miyako entirely failed to look at, just still gazing up at him with wide, bewildered eyes, as he said, “That’s a tub. Which is also like your bucket. A tub is a bigger bucket, the hot tub is a bigger tub… what they all have in common is that they’re filled with warm water that’s meant to make you feel better.”

Kaito laughed lightly at that, before sighing, resigning himself to this next part as he went to grab the cup, “Though, maybe you don’t understand that, cause you don’t seem to like the warm water all that much…”

Kaito, on instinct, winced when he first started lightly pouring the cup on Miyako’s feet first, the water trailing off the matted floor table and onto the floor itself a little… but to Kaito’s genuine surprise and delight, Miyako didn’t immediately looked pissed this time. Kicking her legs a little at the feeling, but not looking like a cat who had just dipped a paw into a puddle by accident. “Eyyyyy… is someone getting used to her baths? M~iiiiyaaaaaa, are you gonna stop crying every time we do baths? … please say yes kid, it’s gonna be so hard to keep you clean if you try to fight bathtime for the rest of your life…”

Kaito began to wipe down her feet more, the hot water helping, before he carefully started on her legs…

Kokichi had taken some time to calm down, had actually gone to spend a little time with his dad, but even after that, when he returned to their room, it really wasn’t that long into Kaito’s shift. Still, Kokichi was feelin’ a little like he wanted family time.

When he didn’t see Kaito or Miya in the room, he was actually more surprised not to hear any crying, and instead just murmurs and cooing from the bathroom. He peeked in, heart melting a little seeing Kaito ever so carefully giving Miyako a bath, and for once their daughter just considering the odd feeling, rather than ejecting it outright.

“She’s growing up so fast, isn’t she? Already starting to come around to bathtime.”

Kaito glanced up in surprise, before grinning, “Hey babe! Sorry, I didn’t hear you come in. Okay, okay, settle a bet between Miya and I. She thinks you guys went to go chill out in the mountains, but I think you guys went to hang out in the hot tub. See, our Miyako here doesn’t understand that the mountains are very far away. Do you, Miyako? N~ooooo, your sense of geography and space are still very b~aaaaaad.” Kaito coo’d at her, gently wiping at her stomach.

Miyako looked a bit non-plussed at this, but she still wasn’t crying, so… victory.

Kokichi laughed softly and came into the bathroom proper, settling down on his knees slightly off to the side to not be in the way, though he was near enough to hand Kaito anything he might need, and to catch Miyako’s attention if it strayed off of Kaito. “Ah, it’d be nice to go to a mountain again, but that’s a little far-fetched, Miya-Miya. Plus, you think we’d go without Dad? Absolutely not, family trips are for family.”

“Though,” Kokichi grinned, looking up at Kaito through his lashes, “The hot tub is a little silly too. It’s too hot today to use it. Shuu-chan and Maki-chan are in his study, and I spent a little time with Grampy. Oh, Mi-Mi, when you learn to talk, it’s all over; he’s gonna spoil you so much. It’ll be a race between him and Dad for them to get you everything you want. Dada and I have no chance of stopping them.”

“Oh, I don’t know~” Kaito sighed, a dreamy look falling over his face as he said, “A lot of bubbling hot water, in a dark room full of steam… sounds kinda nice to me. Miya, I need you to like this stuff, so that when you’re older you can come hang out with dad and just chill out in the unchill places… Shuichi was only going all the time because his ankles and back hurt so much caaaarrying youuuuu.”

And as he washed her shoulders, Miyako making little baby sounds as he did so, he rolled his eyes at Kokichi, “Oh, sure, me and Ikou are gonna spoil her. Like I’m not going to be batting candy out of you and Shuich’s hands with a stick, cause she’s gonna want some sugar, and you guys are gonna be, ‘Sure, why not, let's have some candy for everyone’. Tsk.”

Re-focusing his gaze, he asked, “How was hanging out with your dad today?”

“Just wait ‘til Fall,” Kokichi hummed lightly, watching Miyako adoringly. “I’ll like it again when the weather isn’t trying to make me melt. I’ll be sweating enough away from any source of water. Mm...we’re gonna teach you to swim, Miya-Miya. You’re gonna outpace me, I know.”

Snickering softly at Kaito’s incredibly valid point, Kokichi shrugged without shame. Kaito was never going to not keep an eye on their plates, making sure everyone was eating a rounded meal, but Kokichi couldn’t see the harm in having an extra candy bar here and there, especially if Miyako dietarily needed it. They’d still be eating their veggies and protein anyway.

Settling down, Kokichi sighed in contentment. “It was nice. I told him about my trip into town--oh, my friend Kerry’s keeping an eye out for that book I wanted, so they might be swinging by--and we reminisced a bit. I had my own books, of course, but a few times a week I’d insist on dragging him to the library before bed to pick out new things for him to read me.”

“...did you ever read that book Mathilda? About the young girl who loved to read and got magic powers to escape from her awful parents and awful headmistress? I adored it, growing up, and my dad used to pretend that I was making things move around while we read it, since I was such a bookworm too.”

“Mathilda? Doesn’t ring a bell.” Kaito said, now preparing for the most risky part of the bath… tilting Miyako up. As he lifted her up, grinning apologetically as Miyako pouted, making more offended baby noises as he washed her back, Kaito said, “What was her power? ...oh, um, whats the one where you can make things move with your brain… telepathy? Was Mathilda and baby Kokichi telapths? Was daddy a little magic book-worm baby, Miya? Oooooh, you’re doing so well… such a good girl…”

“There’s a good Miya~” Kokichi cooed in encouragement. (Reaching out with a gentle calmness, a loving pride. Good Miya…)

“She had telekinesis...I think is the term,” Kokichi hummed. Though, she lost it at the end, but if Kaito had never read it, then he didn’t want to spoil it. “And she was very bright, though that’s not so much of a power, than it was just her loving to learn. It’s a really wonderful story… Maybe I could read it to the both of you for the first time sometime.”

“...I can’t wait to share all sorts of stories with her,” Kokichi smiled, looking up at Kaito. “People talk about having the chance to experience something for the first time again, but I think it’ll be so special to see her firsts.”

“Heh. Well, this is the opportunity.” Kaito chuckled, laying her back down and lifting her little tushy to wash that part down too, Miyako oddly enough never seeming that bothered with that part. Move her back or head? Terrible! How dare you! She was using that! Butt? Barely notices, does not care, get your business done and leave. “All the stories are gonna be new to her. Alice in Wonderland? Is gonna blow her little mind someday. Total baby acid trip…”

As he dried her off, Kaito spent some time pressing his fingers against the bottom of her feet, doing little baby massages based on the books recommendations. Kaito felt a little better about putting any sort of pressure onto Miyako’s body these days, as each washing and changing and burping went by where Miyako didn’t shatter beneath Kaito’s too big feeling hands. She was still so small in these early weeks, but she was starting to fill out and feel more solid with every day that went by. Little buff baby…

“I’d listen to any story you want to tell us, babe. I dunno how much of an audience she’ll make right now, our Miya’s a little self-absorbed at the moment, but I promise to be a totally captive and engaged audience.”

“Part of me can’t wait until she has her first favorite song, but I know we’re going to be hearing it non-stop once she chooses. Same with story requests...and little games.” He knew it’d be maddening in the moment, but just like how he had anticipated the screaming nights, Kokichi just couldn’t help but look forward to it all. Just more and more of his daughter’s life.

Gently reaching in, Kokichi softly stroked his finger against her arm as Kaito gave her a massage, wanting to be close. Their little daughter…

Laughing softly, he nodded. “It’s gonna be a while before we can read her a story and she’ll remember it, huh. But I’m glad I can still share things with you. And you, me… Did you manage to track down some of those Luminary books you wanted to get for her? I should’ve asked… I could’ve checked at the bookstores if you were searching down some.”

“Hm? Oh, no, I just haven't made time.” Kaito admitted, as he grabbed the fresh diaper and started to put it on, saying softly, “Now, please wait at least five whole minutes before you wet yourself again, baby, because if I have to change you again in four minutes, dad’s gonna cry. So many diapers, baby. S~ooooo many. A maddening amount of diapers… that reminds me, I gotta empty the bin.” Kaito laughed.

Finishing her diaper change, Kaito carefully picked her up, and kissed at both her knees, not minding as Miyako sorta mindlessly kicked at him as he said, “There we go. Kisses for being such a beautiful, wonderful, non-screamy baby. Kisses for not screaming at dad. What a good little baby. Ready to be wrapped back up, Miya? Let’s go, let’s go, let’s go put baby in her blankie.”

Cradling her, Kaito got to his feet, saying, “I’ll put all this stuff away when I put her back in the crib. Man, I can’t wait for her to get big enough for some onesies. Dad wants to put you in cute little onesies… put your daddy and dada and aunt Maki in cute little onesies and watch you all be cute together… won’t do it to your brother though, he’s the age where he’ll hold it against me forever~”

“Like Maki-chan and Shuu-chan won’t?” Kokichi good-naturedly teased as he rose as well, shaking out his legs a little in the small amount of space he gave himself, not wanting to knock into any of the bath supplies. “And no worries, I’ll get started on this stuff, while you put her to sleep. Teamwork!”

So...he started that, grabbing a towel to sop up the water that made it onto the floor, putting the bucket and low table into the tub to wash off…

And he counted in his head, raising an eyebrow to himself when there wasn’t any crying. “Oooh, looks like Miyako’s really holding out for you. I told you you’d be her favorite. If Shuu-chan or I were doing bathtime this time, she’d need a change in under a minute.”

Kaito chuckled at that, putting Miyako on her blanket and starting to wrap her as he said, “I might be shooting myself in the foot, asking her to wait. Watch, five minutes goes by, she’s all tucked away in the crib and warm and just about to go to sleep… then bam. Diaper changing time again.”

Kaito felt a small impulse to reassure Kokichi that Miyako, of course, couldn’t possibly actually have a favorite… but she kinda… did? In a weird way. It was probably the color thing Shuichi had mentioned ages ago, but if all three of the dads were nearby, Miyako did have a habit of fixating on Kaito, if she was gonna pay attention to anyone. Though, Kaito would argue without a doubt that when Miyako felt like crying? It was up to Miyako when she was gonna calm down, or who with, or what would work. There was no real pattern so far. They just tried stuff until something worked, and they had not worked out a surefire method even kinda yet.

(Kaito didn’t know that Miyako wasn’t fixating on his hair color, but his heat. Between the three dads, Kaito radiated like a casual fireplace against her. And he had the biggest habit of randomly, obsessively touching her. He was incredibly difficult to ignore, a massive fireplace that kept grazing random limbs and would sometimes say the first sound that Miyako had ever recognized as an actual pattern.)

(For her limited senses? Kaito was fascinating.)

When she was all wrapped up nicely again, Kato kissed her hairline, wiped it off, and put her down in the crib, hesitating as he waited for her to protest… nothing. “Maybe she’s just in a good mood today?” Kaito mused, before going to check in on Kokichi in the bathroom, seeing if there was anything left to help him with.

Kokichi laughed along with that, using one of their many bottles of baby soap to clean off the table and bucket. It would probably be fine to use regular soap since he was rinsing it anyway, but...Kokichi wanted to be safe about things. The last thing he wanted was to give Miyako a rash because something should be fine.

Other than that one day...she’d been a pretty easy baby, all things considered. And Kokichi knew that it had only been a week, and once it started getting a few months in and she didn’t need to sleep constantly, that would be the real test, but...still. He wasn’t feeling the all-encompassing strain, and he was thankful for it.

“I’ll take it!” Kokichi said softly, yet in a chipper tone, dumping the bucket out into the tub. “A happy Miya makes for happy dads, I believe. I think she got pretty comfy earlier when Shuu-chan was feeding her too, though she doesn’t have the kind of memory for that to affect her whole day yet. But it was very sweet.”

“When I was in the shrine?” Kaito asked, reaching out and drawing Kokichi into a hug, wrapping his arms around his waist and chest and kissing at the side of his face, holding him tight as he said, “Mmmmm, that sounds cute… good ol’ dada doing the feeding things and the holding things and the walking things… man, it’s so nice how quickly he’s been healing. What a relief… even if his stomach scar is still reaaaaallly grooooossss.”

It was healing! But it was gross. And as the number one person to help Shuichi change his bandages every day, Kaito felt inclined to comment. It always looked wet.

Kokichi made a happy little noise as he nodded, pleased with Kaito’s affections. He’d calmed down a lot since earlier, but...it was still nice to feel his husband’s arms around him, lips sweetly kissing at his cheek.

“...he seems happier. More at peace. Even if he accepted being pregnant...I think it means a lot to Shuu-chan now that he… He has his body back more now.”

“And surgery tends to do that,” Kokichi rolled his eyes, tipping his head back against Kaito. “It’s pretty gross. Bodies are gross. But it’ll heal up, and give Shuu-chan another step closer to feeling at home in himself. Just wait until it’s just a little line below his hips--you’re gonna be kissing it all sentimental, talking about how amazing Shuu-chan is for having Miya, and depending on his mood, Shuu-chan might let you get all sexy.”

“Atua willing.” Kaito said gravely, resting his chin on the top of Kokichi’s head, blinking tiredly at the shower wall. “And don’t get me wrong, it is amazing and it’s absolutely gonna be a gorgeous scar that I am going to enjoy using as an outline someday. Just… not yet. Gotta let it heal first.”

Letting go of Kokichi, Kaito took the now empty and cleaned bucket from him before putting it away under the sink. Waiting for Kikichi to pass him the floor table so that he could tuck that away too. “You know what I haven't had since Miyako was born? A dream. Not a single one. And I dream constantly these days, ever since getting to Dicea. Non-stop dreaming. I guess I’m just totally conked out and--”

Kaito’s words were cut off as Miyako gave a frustrated little whine from the other room. “...whelp. I gotta give it to her. She lasted longer than five minutes.” He sighed, putting the table away and going to go unwrap and change her.

Kokichi was looking forward to the next time they all were in the mood to be intimate together. Shuuichi had seemed so frustrated, or just put out, since he’d gotten big, that he couldn’t do all the things he wanted when they were together, and...Kokichi didn’t know. He just felt like it’d be special to see Shuuichi get some of his body confidence back.

But! That wouldn’t be for a good while, both between Shuuichi’s healing time, and just how long it would be before they didn’t need someone constantly watching Miya, and they all weren’t totally exhausted.

Which...could be a reason for not dreaming…

Kokichi frowned faintly, a stir of worry somewhere in his mind, though he gave Kaito a fond smile when Miya started crying, and he followed him out to the room after not too long, just finishing tidying the bathroom.

“...that’s a little weird, honestly, but...yeah. It might be that you’re just too tired to dream.” Kokichi considered his husband, handing over a fresh diaper as Kaito unwrapped Miyako. “...how have you been sleeping other than that? We might be able to get a few more hours now since Shuu-chan’s feeling up to having his own shifts.”

Kaito shrugged, taking the fresh diaper with a small ‘Thanks, ‘Kichi’ as he cleaned Miyako up again, bundling up the dirty diaper and binning it before putting her in a fresh one. “Uhhhhhh yeah? Yeah. Wait, that wasn’t a yes or no question. What was the question? Oh! Yeah, I mean, I’ve been going to bed just fine. Lot of, like… ya know when you just… blink?”

Kaito looked over to Kokichi, putting his hand up and, with a dry expression, tapping his fingers together in little bursts, “And it’s like, oh, I only blinked, and now its six hours later? Lot of that. I think…” Kaito yawned, talking about how tired he was just making him more aware of it, “I think that’s a good thing though? It’s gotta mean that’s some pretty deep sleep, right? Where you’re barely conscious that you slept at all? That sounds right to me. What do you think, M~iiiiiya?”

Miyako, dried again, looked up at Kaito in fascination as he started to wrap her again. Kaito putting her back in the crib as he murmured, “Itty-bitty lovely baby, gotta get her sleep in too, Miyako’s got the toughest sleep schedule of all, really. Up every three hours… I’d be cranky too. Poor baaaaaby. M~iiiiiyaaaaa.”

It never took long for Miyako’s eyes to start blinking sleepily once she was wrapped up and laid out again. Kaito watched her start to fade, smiling warmly at her. So pretty… such a good little princess…

“Mm. Cali and Kimiko both go to camp in a few days.” Kaito mused, sighing, “You think I should try to find something to keep Tim busy? Or just like… let him run wild? He might destroy more vents and carve more walls, is the thing…”

...that wasn’t very encouraging. But it did soothe his worries about the lack of dreams. If Kaito was in full exhaustion-mode, then it made sense his brain wouldn’t have the extra juice to bring some nonsense in.

However, it did pose a new problem, even if being a little exhausted wasn’t something they could fully deal with.

“...I’m not sure, honestly… I can never remember if it means you’re getting really good sleep, or really horrible sleep. I guess that depends on whether you’re feeling rested when you wake up or not… But, again, I think we might be able to get a few more hours in, going forward.”

As Kaito put Miyako back to sleep, Kokichi came up to his side and pressed against the taller man, initiating some affectionate touch as they looked at their daughter. Such a sweet thing…

“...I think he might enjoy a little freedom, but you two and Maki-chan should talk about it. There are a lot of workshops that always happen over the summer, so...Tim might be able to try out something that’s only going on for a week or so, so he has some of that summer freedom, but some structure too… I dunno. I think you should talk about it.”

“Yeah, that’s probably the answer, huh? My smart, sweet, thoughtful ‘Kichi…” As Kaito watched Miyako’s eyes blink close and not open again this time, he straighted up, looked down at Kokichi and, with a slight sigh that betrayed literally nothing, suddenly swept him up bridal style all in one swift movement.

Swaying in a small, slightly slow two step sort of dance, Kaito continued to lightly praise in a soft, not quite sing-song voice, “My sweety ‘Kichi… probably helped draft the treaty ‘Kichi… bet he’s graffiti’d ‘Kichi…” Kaito gave Kokichi a curious look, “Actually, that’s a point. I bet you went through a graffiti phase. Everyone’s always talking about your brat phase. Were you a little delinquent like that?”

Talking generally was. Communication being the root of any relationship and all that.

Kokichi squeaked, though, not quite being a bastion of knowledge, though he hadn’t set out to be in the first place, as Kaito unceremoniously scooped him up, leaving Kokichi to scramble for a moment to put his arms around Kaito’s shoulder. But...it was nice.

Laughing softly along with Kaito’s little song, Kokichi sat up a bit to place kisses on Kaito’s face--little pecks on his temple and feathery brushes of lips against his cheeks, sweet almost-kisses, right at the corner of Kaito’s lips. Wanting to convey his own affection.

“I guess it would technically be graffiti,” Kokichi laughed after a moment, considering the question. “I really admire all the graffiti and street art styles, you know? ‘Course I wanted to try out a design myself...but I could never bring myself to draw on the bedroom walls,” he nodded to said walls around them. “So I’d do it in the halls. Pissed some people right off, and it took a few afternoons for me to clean it off...after folks had been by to see.”

“That made you clean it off yourself? Maaaaaan, what’s the point of being royalty if you can’t get away with drawing on the walls? Shame.” Kaito sighed, still gently swaying Kokichi, enjoying his little feather kisses as he suddenly chuckled, “I was a hazard growing up. I didn’t mean to be, but looking back? Woof. Heh… pun unintended.” Kaito said with a small, distracted laugh, “I bet they were beautiful drawings too. My talented Kokichi… squeaky ‘Kichi… mmmm… squeaky ‘Kichi’s one of my favorites Kokichi’s…”

Kaito blinked, and realizing he had trailed off from his original trail off point, said, “Oh my god. So… there was this one time? I got into so much trouble for this one, but this one time? I got it into my head to play a prank by, like, covering one of the studies in firewood? Like, I was going to one of the storage rooms, no shit, two floors down, and carrying up in little bundles all this wood and just spraying it and layering it all over everything. The floor, the couches, the bookcases. Prank of the century!”

“And I got cold feet.” Kaito laughed, shaking his head, “Realized I could get into some real trouble for it. So~ I went and put allllll the wood back, but, two things happened. One? I got lazy. Near the end, I started to just hide wood in the rooms between the floors… and then, like, I started to not even hide them? Just threw them into random rooms and moved on. I think my thought process was that, like, one or two logs of wood found on the floor wasn’t a big deal, who would even notice? Annnnnnd~” Kaito chuckled again, “My dumb little self, when the study was empty of wood? In no way considered the fact that the room was now covered in dirt and soot and splinters of wood, like, eeeeeverywhere. Every inch of that room. It was in shambles… but, nope! I was convinced, job done, no one would notice, time to go play.”

“Kids are so stupid.” Kaito laughed, rolling his eyes, “Especially me. Little walking hazard~”

Kokichi nodded somberly. “I made the mess, so I had to clean it up, and it wasn’t something outside of my capabilities, like, yanno, dismantling a ventilation system. Dad always made sure I was taking responsibility for my actions. Sucks when you’re a kid and aren’t thinking of any consequences, but I suppose that’s how you learn.”

Still kissing and cuddling Kaito, Kokichi...got a little confused, not understanding what sort of pun his husband had made, and...when he started on the story of his own ill-advised antics…

...the first thought in Kokichi’s mind was that that hadn’t been a prank.

Not that it was a bad prank, or that Kokichi didn’t understand how filling a room with firewood could be a prank, but that… He knew the exact instance Kaito was talking about, and he knew that Kaito was lying in some way, maybe even to himself. That it hadn’t been a prank.

(It had been a call for help.)

...he could so easily see the shock in Kaito’s eyes as Kokichi went off about their children’s safety…

After a moment, Kokichi snorted and nuzzled into Kaito’s neck. “Man… That kind of reminds me of the prank where you wrap an entire room in gift paper? Like every individual thing, and all the furniture and stuff too… I think that would’ve been a pretty funny prank if you stuck with one idea or another.”

“Pfffff, gift wrap? Well, wrapping paper would have been lighter to carry than bundles of wood. Why didn’t I think of that? Less splinters too. Maybe the occasional papercut… don’t tell Timothy that idea. I still haven't forgiven the kid for tarring Aiichi’s chair. I’ve only had him for a year and that kids taken a decade off my life, easily. His sister is right behind him too…”

Heading over to the bed, holding Kokichi securely so he wouldn’t end up sprawled or bumped around, Kaito turned his back to the mattress and, with no more ceremony, fell straight back onto it. His legs hanging off the edge and, once landed, loosening his grip on Kokichi to let his husband escape him however he wished as he mused, “Wrapping paper… man, I’m so mad that didn’t occur to me. I think I was… seven? Eight? A few years before I met Maki. Little thin kid arms, carrying fire wood literally from before the sun rose to later afternoon… man, that actually sounds like a great workout. Maybe I should do that again? Get ripped.”

Kokichi snickered a bit, thinking back fondly on Tim’s prank, even if it had scared Maki and Kaito to death. He was less enthused about the vents, and even that wasn’t meant as a prank anyway, but he hoped Tim still had tomfoolery to get into. Maybe that would be his summer project.

As Kaito tightened his hold on him, Kokichi did the same in return, bracing himself for whatever his husband had in store. Flopping down on the bed wasn’t the most exciting, but they could do without exciting for a good while. When Kaito loosened his grip, Kokichi simply shifted down a little, spreading himself more evenly on Kaito and not just bunched up on his chest.

Giving him a fond look, Kokichi placed a light kiss on his lips. “Only if you don’t quit halfway through putting everything back away. And if you help clean up.”

“...also, you already are ripped. Your bicep is about the size of our entire infant daughter,” Kokichi pointed out, reaching over to give Kaito’s bicep a squeeze.

“Mmmmm, n~oooo… I am the second Luminary son! If I want to haphazardly try to hide empty wrapping paper rolls? Who’s gonna stop me? ...so long as no one told my mentor.” Kaito grinned, thinking of his old (though, she hadn’t been, really. She had just seemed old to a small child. Kaito wondered how old she had actually been?) mentor, before admitting, “And even then, she’d have made me clean something in the temple, not the actual mess I made. Spoiled royal baaaaaby. Man, what a little asshole I must have been.”

“And I’m fit, babe, not ripped. I’m imagining, like… Sakura ripped. How do you even do that? I asked her once, and she said a lot of shit about protein and daily training, but coooome ooooon… I eat well! I work out a lot! I’ve been bigger than I am now! Nothing short of an intervention from god would have gotten me anything close to Sakura’s size! Not a chance in hell, I could have carried trees on my back twenty-four seven for my whole life, no way I’d ever get that big. Tragic…”

Kissing Kokichi’s cheek, Kaito said somberly, “Can you still bring yourself to love me, even if I’ll never be Sakura’s size? I know it’s asking a lot...”

Rolling his eyes a little bit, Kokichi snorted and placed a few more kisses on Kaito’s face before settling down and resting his head on Kaito’s chest. They were joking around and it was fun, but...well. It was spoiling. Kokichi wondered how much that actually made an impact on someone growing up, though.

Somehow he couldn’t see Byakuya and Kaede being very different if they had been expected to clean up their own messes growing up.

“You aaaaaare ripped,” Kokichi insisted, but he could concede that Sakura was on a whole ‘nother level. She was just...big. Kokichi wagered genetics had something to do with it, so Kaito was out of luck there, but...seriously. Even with a biological advantage, it was impressive to see her stick to her routine enough to maintain that mass.

Making a disappointed noise, Kokichi traced his hand along Kaito’s chest, feeling out the muscles there. He heaved a sigh, as if he weren’t absolutely thrilled every day to cushion his head on them. “I suppose… Your personality more than makes up for not being built like a caravan, in my books. And I can still wrap my arms all the way around you.”

“My patient, understanding ‘Kichi… doesn’t mind that I’m not as meaty… um…” Kaito paused, trying to think of more, “... my ‘Kichi who’s not greedy… not super needy ‘Kichi… sometimes a little leaky ‘Kichi… oh! Cheeky ‘Kichi. That’s pretty good…”

Idly, Kaito started tapping out a rhythm on Kokichi’s back, eyes closed, murmuring more attempts at rhymes with Kokichi’s name, getting a little caught on the word ‘reedy’ because he knew it was a word but for the life of him what did that mean again? Was it a plant? A sound? Little reedy ‘Kichi… he suddenly said, eyes still closed, “Babe? You were humming a song when Shuichi was having his panic attack the other night… what was it? I was, uh, a little too distracted at the time to ask, but I thought it was nice.”

Kokichi closed his eyes and grinned, listening to his husband’s heart act as a beat to his poetry, scouring his brain for every “ee” ending word he knew. The taps on his back just made the performance more complex and endearing. He didn’t even snark about how, oh, now he’s not greedy ‘Kichi, huh?

It was just...a nice, slow moment between them.

The kind of vibe that fit that song, in his opinion.

“Mm?” Kokichi hummed, before smiling a little. “It is nice, isn’t it… A sort of peaceful song. It’s called The Tower of Spirits, though I couldn’t tell you what that means. I heard it from a street performer a while back, and I was enamored with it. They said it was the kind of song you’d hear in a safe moment of reprieve… I was hoping it’d feel like that to Miya, too.”

“If you’re the one singing it to her? She’ll learn that’s what it means… daddy’s gooooot her… everything’s okay cause daddy’s there…”

“...pffff.” Kaito suddenly snorted, finally opening his eyes, peeking those warm magenta’s at Kokichi in open, sharp amusement, “Maaaaan, thank goodness you didn’t end up being a weird pervert with a daddy kink. Fuck, can you imagine?”

Kaito laughed, one of those deep, full belly laughs that shook Kokichi on top of him, before letting out a steadying breath, “Man, I got so lucky with you. You could have been anyone. Could have been a creep, or a terrible father, or mean to my friends. Could have been anyone… we got really lucky, Miyako~” Kaito said slightly louder, calling to the crib, though purely playfully, not loud enough disturb the sleeping baby, “You’ll never know how lucky you are… least I hope not.” Kaito said softer, closing his eyes, “Miyako only gets to date nice people. I’ve decided. She doesn’t get to have a bad-boy phase, man or woman or whatever. Kicking all edgy bitches out of this castle. Only sweetlings like her daddy.”

“Snrrrrk!” Kokichi snorted and buried his face in Kaito’s chest, remembering vividly their combined discomfort and embarrassment the one time Kaito had tentatively tried to call him daddy in a sexy way. It had been wholly uncomfortable, but...Kokichi found if it was Miyako saying it sincerely, or his partners referring to him that way in the context of being a father...he didn’t mind it. It recalled the fondness Kokichi had referred to Ikuo as for years.

So...yeah. He was glad they dodged that kink bullet.

Laughing along with Kaito, Kokichi stretched up a little to kiss at Kaito’s neck before sighing. “I think there are a lot of things we thankfully dodged. We were just...really lucky to find each other. To get each other.”

He nuzzled Kaito’s chest more, letting his arms fall along Kaito’s sides in a sort of hug. “...I really hope that Miyako finds love like this, but...yeah. In the intermeaning time...I’d be thrilled if no one broke her heart. We’re definitely making sure she’s keeping her standards up when we have the Dating Talk.”

...Kokichi sighed, opening his eyes a little. “...it was foolish for me, but...I really hope Miyako gets to have a worldview like mine, before I met you guys. That she never has a reason to think any less than the best of people.”

Kaito’s little taps on Kokichi’s back had at some point, basically mindlessly, turned into little circle massages. As he pressed little circles into Kokichi’s back, Kaito’s shoulders felt… heavier. At Kokichi’s hope.

Maybe if her dad just… never said anything around her, ever… Maki too… Shuichi… their fear and anger and resentment flaked off them like dandruff. Their anxieties and paranoia controlled them. How would they hide it from her? Maybe by the time she was old enough to notice, their fears would leave them… heh. Ngh.

“It’s not that foolish,” Kaito sighed, closing his eyes again. “Even your childhood enemies became beloved friends over time. Why not assume the best of the world? It didn’t start letting you down till Luminary showed up. In Dicea, it’s kinda crazy to assume anything else, honestly. I’m sure Miyako will recognize that.”

Kokichi frowned, and reached up, sliding his hands up Kaito’s body until Kokichi’s fingers were up by Kaito’s head, gently pressing in to rub his temples while Kaito rubbed his back.

“You know that’s not true,” Kokichi murmured. “And...I think I said that wrong… I hope she can have a life like that through her childhood. She’ll learn safety and how to protect herself from you guys, but...I don’t want her to have a reason to put it to practice. I want her to be able to...plan to head to a friend’s house, or walk around a festival by herself and not think twice about it, though she’ll check in and have safety systems she does out of habit.”

“...we try really hard to make Dicea safe, but accidents still happen. Things that aren’t accidents still happen. People are selfish or scared or careless, and people get hurt. While we try, no system can account for everything.” Kokichi pressed his head against Kaito’s heart, still rubbing circles into his temples. “...but we always hope for tomorrow to be better than today. So I hope that we can make sure Miya has a childhood that doesn’t have any of the worries we ever had. That’s what I mean.”

Kaito felt his shoulder relax, a little surprised at the temple rubs but, like… not against it. It was nice, if not out of Kaito’s box of familiar sensations. He suddenly had a mental image of a small toy being wound up by a key in the back and found himself chuckling at that same circular motion, even if it wasn’t about ‘winding him up’.

What about… one of those little wind up toys with the cymbals? Making the little tapping sounds when you let the key go. Had Kaito had one of those? He didn’t think so… where had he seen one of those… maybe one of the other kids who used to visit the playroom had brought one with them. Little clappy thing…

“She’s gonna have a good childhood.” Kaito said simply, now idly imagining Miyako with one of those toys. It’d probably drive him crazy in the long run. Little clanking toy. Clang-clang-clang, “And I know I’ve resented it in the past, but you don’t have to convince me bad things happen here, babe. I like that Dicea’s so safe. I like that Miyako’s growing up in a safe place. Like… with really ineffective assassins. And flowers. Nice people… winters kinda insane but, well, she’ll just be inside the castle during the snow, so that’s okay… like the way the trees change color here, in the fall. That’s neat… I know Timothy will keep an eye on her. The staff all seem nice… it’ll be fine. Everything’s going to be fine…”

Kaito just wanted Miyako to be happy. To be a happy, weird little Dicean. She didn’t need any of the Luminary stuff. Luminary wasn’t purely violent, or harsh, or deadly, in the same way Dicea wasn’t a pure beam of innocence… but it was violent, and harsh, and deadly enough that people both within it and outside of it defined it as such, regardless if it was universally true or not. And Kaito was happy enough to not raise Miyako there. He didn’t need to raise strong children. He just wanted her and Tim to be happy.

The Luminaries strength had never spared them any harm in Dicea anyway. Their values were really only suited for keeping little kids happy and distracted and healthy for a morning. Kaito’s strengths wouldn’t help Miyako here, so… he’d adapt. Figure it out. “You ever hear of carrot cake?” Kaito mused, kissing the top of Kokichi’s head, “Like… cake made of carrot? It sounds horrifying. I’m going to try to make one next time I bake, I think.”

It was probably an instinct he’d have to grow out of too, pointing out the dangers and flaws in Dicea. He was fiercely proud of his country, and Kokichi was pretty thrilled to be raising his kids in a place that he considered, on the whole, pretty damn safe. He wasn’t interested or invested in a race to the bottom against Luminary.

But his world view had been dangerous. And pretty stupid, considering his personal experiences. Even in a place like Dicea. So...he wanted their daughter to grow up being safe, but never having those habits be the difference between something tragic happening. He wanted her to be curious and delighted with the world, not concerned with people trying to fool her or wanting to hurt her...not because he wanted her to ignore all that stuff, but because he didn’t want anyone trying to fool or hurt her in the first place.

“Everything will be fine…” Kokichi softly echoed, pausing his massage to run his fingers through Kaito’s hair, letting his blunt nails gently scratch against his scalp. “She has so many people looking out for her, wanting her happiness. We can take the lessons of our own lives to help hers. And it’ll be good…”

Snorting softly, Kokichi moved his fingers back down, pressing firmly, though not hard, along Kaito’s cheekbones. “I’ve heard of...like, vegetable baked goods, but...carrot cake? You’re just tryin’ to sneak more veggies into my sweets. Can’t wait to try it.”

“I just… I actually can’t imagine that it’s good? I’m trying to figure out why it exists.” Kaito admitted, grinning slightly as he felt Kokichi try to mush his face. His husband was really touchy today… it was nice. “Like, carrots are bitter? It doesn’t seem like they’d make a good cake. So I’m gonna, like… run my own experiment. By making it. And trying it… I found the recipe in that Luminary cookbook you got me.” Kaito admitted, chuckling, “And I’ve never heard of it myself before then either. It sounds bad, right?”

“Carrots aren’t that bitter,” Kokichi hummed. “Especially if you cook ‘em with, like, brown sugar or honey? Then they carry that sweetness well. I can at least see where the thought process is...I guess.”

Snorting softly, Kokichi nuzzled into Kaito’s chest more. “I think you could make it good. My top chef hubby can do anything, when it comes to food--just takes ‘im some practice.”

“...I’m glad you liked that gift… I know it’s not totally the same, but it makes me happy for you to bring a little bit of home here.”

“You give great gifts, babe. Luminary cookbooks, knock-out hero rings, mmmm… other things… leaky ‘kichi…” Kaito grinned, somewhere in his head again. “Maybe that’s less of a ‘gift’ though and more an ‘exchange’. You always seem happy…”

“...ooooookay, I gotta sit up or I’m gonna fall asleep.” Kaito realized, huffing as he started to shuffle upwards, shaking his head, trying to shake off the edges of sleep that kept clinging to him, “Up, up, up. Gotta let me up, babe, or I’m gonna be out in like five minutes. Nnnnngh.”

Kaito yawned, scratching through his own hair, ruffling his unkept hair before scratching inside his ear, nose wrinkling as he realized, “Shoot, I forgot to shower this morning… no wonder I feel itchy. Just totally slipped my mind today. Do I smell gross?” Kaito paused, before laughing, “I probably smell like nectar and baby powder, actually. I used to be hot, Kokichi. I’d make people swoon and stumble all over themselves with a look. It was cool. Miyako has brought her old man low.”

Leaky ‘Kichi… Kokichi rolled his eyes a little, but scooted off of Kaito when he tried to sit up, releasing his husband from lazy cuddles. Honestly, he was pretty close to being out too. It could give him a bit of a boost when he took over for dinner time, but...knowing his luck, he’d probably just be even groggier.

Even with getting into a groove, they were all a little off.

Grinning, Kokichi collided with Kaito’s side in a friendly bump. “You smell fine, though I can hold things down if you wanna shower real quick. And...for the record? Watching you be a great father is one of the most attractive things I could see. You make my heart melt every time I see you cradling her with that sweet look on your face.”

Leaning up, Kokichi placed a kiss on Kaito’s cheek. “You’re hot, deal with it.”

“But am I hot enough to get otherwise capable people to act like idiots?” Kaito groaned, before grinning at the kiss, leaning against Kokichi a little, “Ah well. As long as you think I’m sexy. Shuichi’s always a little up in the air, I gotta just take my hits with that one.”

Standing up, Kaito stretched his arms over his head, before saying, “You sure you don’t mind? Real quick shower, just to clean my ears and get some of the… yeah, no doubt, spittle that’s cacked on me somewhere. There’s always spittle somewhere now.” Kaito whined, looking down at himself, looking for signs of Miyako’s drooly baby mouth.

“I think you could still do it. And you’ll be catching all the people into dilfs too. Just wait until we can start taking Miya for walks in her little baby sling--you’ll be catching gazes from the people thinkin’ babies are cute, and people thinking dads are cute.”

Snickering, Kokichi gave one last press of his body against Kaito before bringing his legs up, crossing them as he got comfy on the bed. Giving a nod, he sighed. “I never thought I’d be so accustomed to vomit, but here we are. I thought the number of burp blankets Dad gave us was excessive, but once again he knows best.”

“Yeah, go ahead, I doubt there’ll be anything dramatic in the next twenty minutes,” Kokichi shrugged, waving Kaito off to the bathroom. “I kinda just wanted to hang out here anyway, so I don’t mind bein’ on baby-watch.”

‘What the heck is a dilf?’ Kaito thought, giving his husband a thankful wave before heading to the shower, ‘is that a word or… an acronym? D...dildo… dildo identifying… loooooves fornicating? Dildo identifying? What does it mean to identify as a dildo? Actually, no, I could see it, there were absolutely some friends Kore had that would identity as dildos…’

Kaito then spent some time reasoning out to himself which of Kore’s friends would absolutely choose to be considered living dildos if they had a choice too. Kaber hated moving at all during sex. He bet Kaber would adore being a dildo. Honestly, Kaito had kinda, like… ‘hated’ Kaber was absolutely the wrong word, but maaaaaan, every stupid word out of Kaber’s mouth had rubbed Kaito the wrong way. And he hated how the others had expected him to, like, ‘hang out’ with Kaber when Kore was acting like a ‘dom’ and he and all the other ‘doms’ would go hang out and Kaito fucking had to hang out with Kaber.

Uuuuuugh, Kaber.

Actually, in retrospect, maybe hate was the right word? He always did that stupid thing where he’d try to pull Kaito into these, like, ‘high brow’ arguments but it was just an excuse to tell Kaito about a bunch of random things he knew and when Kaito, already not invested in the conversation, tried to stop talking about it, Kaber would give him that snooty little look as he was like ‘Oh, I’m sorry, I was trying to learn something new, but I guess I was just bothering you’, like… no you weren’t Kaber! You weren’t trying to learn shit! You just wanted to argue with someone you thought was dumber than you for the ego boost! Kaito just wanted to hang out with his boyfriend, why the fuck was he hanging out with Kaber all of the sudden?? Auuuuuughhhh!!!

Kaito glared at the shower head in actual anger. In full blown mental argument with an imaginary Kaber now, literally about Kaber wanting to be a dilf, which Kaito wasn’t even convinced was actually meant to identify dildos but now he was invested in this fatal character flaw of Kabers. You want to be a dildo, Kaber? Fine! You’re too boring and uninvolved and uninteresting to be an equal partner anyway! You’re not even a badass dildo, like the abomination, with zappy functions and spinning things! You’re just a plastic mound that can’t even suction cup to a wall!

God, Kore, why had he been made to hang out with Kaber, that guy suuuuuuucked.

Kokichi had adjusted himself again on the bed, propping himself up with pillows enough that he could lean and see into Miya’s crib. He’d probably get bored at some point and get a book or his sketchbook or something, but for now, he was content to just relax and look at their daughter. She really was the cutest… Her round little baby face and tufts of purple hair, scrunched up little mouth sleeping away…

…

...Kokichi looked up, just...looking at the bathroom door in bewilderment. Kaito was having a heated argument with himself over some...old not-friend? About how they were shitty and...talking about dildos?

...he really wondered what was going on in Kaito’s head sometimes.

Sighing softly, Kokichi peeked over the edge of Miyako’s crib. “...it can be weird, but I hope you’re just as imaginative as your dad. He really has a whole universe in his head.”

It was a weird looking book.

The thing was, Kokichi had explained what the binding of the original book looked like, and this… was not that. But, knowing the original, Terry could kinda see what… the binder might have been going for?? Kinda?? It was still a little…

So, the book had been bound in fish scales, first of all.

Oh, maybe it… wasn’t? They seemed so hard to be fish scales. It was definitely scaled though. Silver scales that shined in dazzling colors when put to various shades of light. No title, though on the inside first page there was an intricately drawn out portrait of dozens of various magical creatures to kind of give a potential reader a clue of what to find inside. And, following Kokichi’s instructions, Terry had verified that it was (hopefully!) the same book by finding the story of The Last Dragon. And, yep! There it was!

Terry had honestly lucked into it...in a kind of baffling way, really. Their mind trailing over the peculiar events as they knocked on the door, gently.

Terry wasn’t sure what they had been expecting, but he was genuinely surprised when Shuichi opened the door. Immediately flustering and blundering as they said, “O-oh! Shuichi! C-congratulations! Y-y-you’re looking well!”

Shuichi blinked in confusion… “I’m sorry, I don’t think I know you…”

It was mid-ish morning, a perfectly normal time for someone to stop by for a visit if they wanted to come by first thing, but it took a few moments for Kerry’s voice coming through the door to register in Kokichi’s mind. When it did, though, he perked, coming up behind Shuuichi with a bundle in his arms. “Right, I’m not sure you two ever met face-to-face--Shuu-chan, this is Kerry; the friend I said might be stopping by? And you did! I’m glad to see ya!”

As he got to the door, it was easier to tell that the bundle in Kokichi’s arms was a baby, Miyako half-dozing against his chest. It wasn’t quite time for her nice 9am breakfast, but she’d woken herself up and had gotten a bit fussy until Kokichi picked her up and started to rock her.

Kokichi himself looked...tired, and a little frazzled, his clothes rumpled and hair curling up everywhere, but delighted to see his friend.

“How was the market? See anything real neat?”

Shuichi gave Terry a briefly wary look, but… right, the housecleaner. Or, ex-housecleaner. Book-gatherer. Alright then. “It’s nice to meet you, Kerry.” Shuichi said softly, opening the door further, in case Kokichi was going to ask them in. He was about to walk away, but his gaze caught the… just shiny book in Terry’s arms, and he lingered, curious.

“Uh, um, yes, you as well! Heard so much about you, Shuichi!” Terry smiled crookedly, before looking at Kokichi (oh dear) and then down to MIyako (Awwwwww!) and having the good sense to only voice aloud one of those thoughts as they said, “Awwwwww, look at heeeeer. Oh, wow, Kokichi, she’s such a little mix of you two! That’s so sweeeeet! Hiiiiiiii.”

Miyako glanced over at Terry, frowning. Hmmmm… new sound, heat and smell. Was Miyako… offended? She wasn’t sure yet. They would see.

Terry, entirely unaware of currently being very heavily judged by the baby, lifted up the book and said cheerily, “Look! I think this is it! Uh, I mean, the markets always an interesting place when you can find it, I saw a lot of things I’d struggle to describe, but! Thankfully it’s never crazy big either, so it only took me a little over an hour of going stall to stall before I lucked out!”

“So… I know its not bound with teeth, but do you think it's the right one?” Terry asked uncertainty.

Kokichi beamed, lighting up a bit amid his fatigue as he showed his daughter off a bit. “Right? We somehow lucked out in her looking like all of us, just the sweetest little combination… Miya-Miya, this is my friend, say helloooo~ They did a big favor for me, they’re veeeeery nice.”

Completely unashamed by the slight dip into baby talk, Kokichi adjusted his grip on Miyako and rubbed her back a little, his body automatically still swaying a little to provide comforting motion to her. And the light in his eyes only gleamed brighter when he allowed himself to focus on the book, the binding different, but no less intriguing.

“Oh wow… Kerry, really, thank you so much… Er…” Kokichi laughed softly, looking a bit sheepish. “Could I ask ya to open it up to a page so I can see? If it had the story I told you about, I think you’re right on, but still… My arms are a little full.”

Shuichi was still a little on guard around the new person, but he looked softly at Kokichi and offered, “You’ve been at it for a bit, Kokichi, I can take her if you want to look at your book?”

Terry, meanwhile, was quick to agree, opening it up and, inexplicably trying to do it upside down and pointing towards Kokichi, looking down as they flicked through the pages before, “Oh! There! Dragon! Is this the same illustration you saw? The story seemed similar, dragons all extinct, th-that sorta thing.”

“G-ergph.” Miya gurgled, wiggling in Kokichi’s arms, {seeing through his eyes} as she excitedly mouthed at Kokichi’s shirt, suckling against the fabric in interest. Little excited baby wiggles.

“Careful, Kokichi,” Shuichi gently advised, “Her hand got near your hair again…”

Kokichi, currently, was in the middle of Parenting Multitasking, absorbing Shuuichi’s offer, Miya’s wiggling, and Kerry showing off the book all with a mind that had not quite woken up since his shift started at 6.

“Right, right…” Kokichi softly murmured, gently moving his shirt out of Miyako’s mouth--he wasn’t wearing, like, wool, so he wasn’t really worried about any little bits of fluff getting in her mouth, but it still wasn’t great for her--before he looked at Shuuichi with gratitude. “I’d appreciate it. I think she’s mostly calmed down, but...I dunno if she’d be thrilled to be put down again.”

“...maybe I should give myself another haircut…”

Giving Kerry a nod as he handed Miya over to Shuuichi, Kokichi refocused on his friend, even if his eyes went back to his daughter. “Yeah, that’s absolutely it. Really, thank you… How much do I owe you?” Looking around, Kokichi looked lost for a moment. “...where did I leave my purse last…?”

“It’s by the desk chair, Kokichi.” Shuichi called to him absentmindedly, sighing as Miyako immediately looked displeased with the hand off. Wiggling and making little whining sounds as Shuichi whispered, “What? Don’t want to be held by dada? Why? What’s wrong with dada? Is it the name? I argued you should call me father, keep both of our diginities when you have to call to me in front of friends, but noooo, that’s not ‘cute’ enough…”

As Shuichi tried to soothe the increasingly fussy Miyako, Temp laughed awkwardly and said, “Uhhhhh… th-three copper! Um, I mean, four copper with tip, but… it’s kind of a non-issue either way you look at it, huh…?”

With a murmured thanks, Kokichi nodded and scampered away for a moment to grab his purse, heading back to Kerry and the door. The fatigue took those moments to creep up on him, but as Kerry told him the price, Kokichi looked up with wide, very awake eyes. “Seriously? That’s like...how much those short paperback compilations are. Even just the binding seems like it’d be two silver or something… Wow.”

Still, Kokichi fished out four copper from the little bag, handing the small coins over to Kerry. “Even more of a lucky find, then.”

Kokichi’s eyes softened, and he gave his friend a grin. “This morning’s been...a little hectic, but...really. This has brightened my whole day; I can’t wait to flip through everything. Have you got much planned for today?”

Terry laughed lightly, taking the coins without protest, though honestly, they felt a little bad even accepting that. They had been going to regale Kokichi with the odd story of how they found it, but, honestly, Kokichi looked so tired and frazzled that mostly what Terry wanted to do was get out of his hair.

And it hadn’t been that strange a story, really. Just a hell of a coincidence. They had entirely failed to find the book at the stalls selling, well… books. And trinkets and oddities and scrolls and whatever else you had in mind. They had found it resting in a makeshift little ‘tea shop’ among the stalls of the catacombs, random books on random tables to entertain the guests, and Terry had noticed the lack of title on the cover and opened it up as a ‘maybe’... when they had been astounded to find the dragon story, they had gone to the tea shop owner, who had dryly remarked they sold tea, not books, that the books were just there for bored customers. Temp was welcome to take it, so long as they bought some tea. So, well… three copper plus tip later…

“Not much,” Terry admitted, shrugging, “I’ll probably just head home after this. I haven't quite found a new job yet, so… not a lot to do with my days right now. M-maybe I’ll try… tea?? Places next?? Tea seems like a relaxing field to work in…?”

Kokichi nodded, feeling a little saddened by the part of him that wanted to be a good host and spend time with his friend, but...the part of him that had already had to change four diapers that morning and soothe a crying baby when it wasn’t even time to wake her up to eat…

“Ooh, I’ll wish you luck! I’ve mostly, yanno, just made tea from bags and pods, but if you get to spend time all around stuff that smells amazing? Definitely a perk,” Kokichi nodded with conviction. “Let’s catch up soon, yeah? I’ll read up and tell you a cool story from the book.”

...honestly Kokichi felt a little bad. It wasn’t like he’d seen Kerry every day or anything, but it had taken him a while to realize that Kerry had quit at all. And they were kind of a drifting soul, but…

...Kokichi couldn’t help but think that he’d driven them away a bit. With the awkwardness…

But Kerry still was a good friend, and Kokichi didn’t want to lose them. He hoped they could find a place they flourished in.

Shuichi watched as Kerry waved-- Hope you enjoy the book, Kokichi!-- before heading off, Kokichi closing the door with a small little output of breath… “It’s been a tough morning.” Shuichi said sympathetically, tapping Miyako’s back, who was still pouting. Annoyed to not be getting what she wanted at the moment, which was slightly cool skin with mental paps. Not to mention getting to look at the slightly familiar shapes Kokichi had glanced at. No faaaaaaair, why was the world so endlessly cruel??

“Shhhh, shhh,” Shuich soothed as Miyako sniffled against him, “I know we laughed at the time, but a baby pulling at your hair first thing in the morning and not letting go is a rough way to start a day.”

As much as he really wanted to dive right into it, Kokichi simply gave the book a giddy look before setting it on one of their nightstands, heading over to Shuuichi and Miyako. “She hasn’t seen her own hair yet--imagine her surprise when she realizes it’s the same as mine. Maybe it’s, like...genetic familiarity that got her attention.” Kokichi laughed softly, but his face was drawn with fatigue as he joined them.

In his usual manner, Kokichi kissed the inside of his hand before pressing his fingers to her little head. “C’mon, Miya-Miya, it’s alright. You love being held by Dada--he is very comfy and gives great hugs.”

“...I don’t think I’ve had hair short all the way around for a long time… It’s hard to get the back, you know? Maybe I’ll actually ask Denji-chan to make sure everything’s out of baby-grasping range,” he said after a moment. Kokichi would be content to just collapse against Shuuichi and sleep right there, but...baby duty. He’d nap when Shuuichi properly took over.

“...I hope there’s somethin’ good for breakfast… Feel like I could eat a Kai-chan portion.”

Miyako didn’t seem to have any particular opinions on Dada’s hugs at the moment, but she did settle a little when she felt the familiar hand press against her head, settling down against Shuichi a little as Shuichi continued to gently pap, pap, pap her back.

“You would explode.” Shuichi said with absolute certainty, “And if you didn’t? You’d spend the rest of the week trying to convince Kaito to stop loading your plate twice what you usually eat. You know he’d try to take advantage of an appetite increase. Kaito always wants to put more weight on you.”

He did wonder what was taking Kaito, actually. He and Maki had gone to train the kids in the morning, Haneda wanting to take them to some sort of arts and crafts thing for kids for the rest of the day that was being held in the park. But it was getting close to nine. Miyako would eat twice before they got breakfast at this rate.

Kokichi nodded sadly, resigned to never truly eating as his husband did. While Kokichi would contest that he could out-eat anyone when it came to sweets, he simply had a size disadvantage when it came to normal meals. There was only so much he could pack into his stomach, and even pushing that limit was trouble.

“He just has to settle with doing it slowly,” Kokichi sighed. “I am gaining back the weight I lost, but it’s not any faster than it was the first time. And the only thing eat more is gonna do is make me not want to eat as much.”

Ever so gently, Kokichi stroked the back of Miyako’s head as he sighed longingly. “Nnnnng… There’s no way we’re getting miso soup when it’s this warm out… No porridges either. Maybe a hash… I could go for a big plate of a loaded hash…”

“...I’m gonna totally pass out while I try to read the book. I’m calling it now.”

“Would you like to read it to us?” Shuichi asked, giving the book a curious look, “You said it was a list of fantasy creatures, right? That seems… useful.”

Glancing at the clock, he said, “Don’t forget that it’s coming up nine though. Miyako might be as hungry as you are. She keeps trying to eat my shirt…” Shuichi shivered slightly as the drool finally broke past the fabric and started to chill his skin, “Miyaaaaa, stoooooop.”

Kokichi snorted lightly, giving Shuuichi an amused look (even if he...couldn’t quite shake the feeling in the back of his mind that it really was useful). “I’m not going to say no to an opportunity like that, even if you don’t have to pander to me, Shuu-chan. And I’ll keep an eye on the clock--we can absorb the stories while I give her some breakfast.”

Giving Miya another second-degree kiss, Kokichi sat on the edge of their bed and grabbed the book, looking over it for a moment in wonder before starting to flip to the index.

“...how about I read you the section about dragons? I told you it was about the last one in what’s Luminary today...you interested?”

(He hadn’t gotten to tell Shuuichi about Maki. He hadn’t gone back to talk while they were asleep since, knowing that they genuinely needed the rest… And that it already was a lot to process.)

Shuichi went to lay down, holding Miyako to his chest as he mounted the pillows against his back, and grabbing the pacifier on the night stand before passing it to Miyako, who easily shifted from suckling on his shirt to suckling on the pacifier as he said, “Dragons… I can’t even imagine. Tell me about the dragons, Kokichi.”

“So… your thoughts?” Kaito prompted, as he and Maki finished collecting the food and heading up. “What do you think?”

“I think you’re overthinking it,” Maki said, “Tim will be fine.”

“He’s going to be all by himself! His friends are going camping! His--”

“He still has Haneda, and Hajime, and you, and me.” Maki said, “Not to mention Chase. And we left him alone plenty when we first got him. It will only be for a month. He can entertain himself easily without Cali and Kimiko.”

“But they’re his best friends! What is he supposed to do while they’re gone!?”

“What did you do when Shuichi and I were busy with work and training. There were months we weren’t available to babysit you.”

“Cruel, Maki-roll… and I waited for you to come back.” Kaito pouted.

Maki rolled her eyes, “No you didn’t. You made other friends, focused on hobbies, or just sat around doing nothing. And that was fine. Timothy doesn’t need us to keep him busy and distracted. He’s fine.”

“What if he gets into trouble…”

“That’s a different conversation, isn’t it? He’s still not allowed to leave the castle without someone with him--”

“He goes to that pond outside the walls all the time.”

“Kaito, that’s literally just outside the walls, I’m protective, not crazy,” Maki said, raising an eyebrow at him, “He doesn’t leave the castle alone. And he better be safe in the castle itself, for the staff’s sake. But, so far, that seems to be true. And he’s adept at self-defense and checks in with one of us at designated times already. With his safety relatively assured? Let him run wild otherwise. He’ll find his own ways to entertain himself. Maybe he’ll make new friends.”

“... I overheard Stacy’s mom saying that Stacy was doing horse riding lessons--”

“We’re not competing with Stacy’s mother, are we? Do you wanna die?”

Sighing at that, Kaito called through the door, “Food! Anyone home?”

Kokichi had read aloud the story of the last dragon, and he and Shuuichi were just looking at the double-page illustration of the dragon when he heard Kaito’s voice, perking. Food.

Leaving the book open on the bed, Kokichi hopped away to open the door, smiling widely but his eyes affixed to the trays Kaito and Maki carried. “Good morning! Kerry came by earlier--they found the book! I was just readin’ to Shuu-chan an’ Miya. You won’t believe how ready I am for breakfast, though…”

Despite looking no more put together than when Kerry had stopped by, there was an almost manic sort of energy to Kokichi as he chattered, ready to stuff his face for a few moments before he’d give Miya her breakfast too.

Shuichi had listened to the story with interest, but had felt himself relax a little when it was established pretty quickly that dragons were extinct. He didn’t know for certain how accurate this book was, if the writer could be trusted, but… it made sense, if dragons were as massive as suggested, that they’d be extinct by now. Otherwise how would the average person not be aware they were around?

A strange, ancient history… and it was sort of interesting, Shuichi quickly coming to the same revelation as Timothy, that the dragon had likely lived in Luminary based on the description. Turned the mountains into sand… he could see that, for the type of deserts they had. Mostly hard flatlands, with seemingly random hills of edges rocks, some so consistent that it gave the impression of walking through the bottom of a canyons, but on level flooring. Maybe those canyon rises were flattened mountains?

Shuichi wasn’t sure if that… made any sense at all. Geography or terrain science wasn’t something he was particularly studied in. But, in the end, it was idly speculation that didn’t matter much. Dragons not a problem to anyone anymore.

Maki brought Shuichi a plate of food, “Hungry? I’ll take her.”

Shuichi smiled, letting Maki pulled Miyako from his arms, “Thank you, Maki.”

“Soooomeone’s hungry, huh?” Kaito grinned at Kokichi, his eyes accounting quickly at all the little signs of Kokichi’s stress and saying uncertainly, “You good, babe? The morning going alright since Miyako tried to pull your scalp off?”

Kokichi laughed before taking a breath and calming himself a bit, looking up to give Kaito a tired grin. “It’s alright… She’s been meticulous with her diaper usage today, and she woke up kinda pissed a bit ago, but...it’s okay. I’m just gonna take a nap later...prolly gonna ask Denji-chan when I get a sec to help me cut my hair.”

“But first!” Kokichi chirped happily, looking around at his family settling down together, “Breakfast!”

Collecting his own set from the trays--looked like some fried eggs, toast with pats of butter and jam on the side, thin slices of salted fish, some sort of glazed sausage, some sort of vegetable pancake, and just a whoooooole ton of seasoned spinach--Kokichi nodded over to the open book. “Check out that cool illustration--there’s one for, like, every creature in it.”

“Oooooh, right, the famous ‘book with teeth’.” Kaito mused, heading over to Shuichi and, taking his face in his hands and entirely ignoring the fact that Shuichi was mid-bite, kissing at his cheek and the corner of his mouth a few times as he said, “Hey handsome… looking good~”

“Mmhm.” Shuichi hummed, gesturing his head to the book before swallowing, “No teeth with this version. Looks like it's made of some sort of mix of leather and fish scales. Kokichi told you about the dragon story?”

“The last dragon of Luminary?” Kaito asked, picking up the book and taking a look at it, “Yeah, of course, he told all of us about it, remember? That’s where Maki got her new nickname.”

Shuichi looked surprised at that, “Oh! That’s right, he did… that slipped my mind. I think I just didn’t make the connection that that story and this book were the same thing.”

“Maki-roll! Wanna see your namesake?” Kaito offered, taking the book to Maki, who was softly having a very serious conversation with Miyako, asking her how her morning was, if she did any exercise, trading workout regimes, “Check it out! It’s red too! That suits you, my fire eyed tempest temptress~!”

Maki rolled her eyes at the nameplay, before glancing at the illustration.

“...” Miyako wiggled in Maki’s arms in excitement. Maki mindlessly started to bounce her to soothe her, “...Shuichi, you’re smart. Do you think those wings would actually support a body that big?”

“Mmmmmm, I’m smart, but I don’t really know… maybe? I mean, I know birds need to be really light for their wings to work, and the dragon doesn’t look… light.” Shuichi mused, before shrugging, “No idea. Why, you don’t think so?”

“Just don’t know if I buy it.” Maki said, looking curiously at the illustration, “I think it would need something extra to fly. Magic feels like the ‘catch-all’ answer, but that makes more sense then sharp leather wings.”

(They cheated.)

(They killed the source and she couldn’t fly.)

(A grounded Dragon was easier to corner.)

“I suppose you could argue they could glide.” Maki mused, looking away from the illustration and heading to the window seat, almost permanently displayed from the window right now as she sat at it, grabbing a plate and nibbling on it as Miyako looked up at her in fascination. Hot man with familiar sounds was hot, but this person sometimes burned. Wind heat. Fascinating.

Kokichi dug into his breakfast ferociously, his empty stomach and taxed brain needing fuel, and needing it about two hours ago. And though even if he felt like he could eat everyone’s portions and then some, his plate didn’t all disappear in an instant. Really, he only paused for a moment as Maki and Shuuichi discussed the logistics of the dragon, as it was drawn, being able to fly.

“You never know,” he shrugged, covering his mouth with the barest motion of politeness to lick around his lips, “That dragon breathed fire, right? Maybe she worked like a hot air balloon--like, whatever makes the fire in her is hot enough to make her buoyant. And then the wings are for lift and steering.”

…

He blinked. Feeling a soft remorse for something that happened many, many years before his birth.

And then went back to his breakfast.

“Some of th’ other chapters have logistic stuff like that, but not for the dragons. Maybe the author thought it was close enough for them that people would just think it works and not question it much while they were reading.”

“Good ol’ suspension of disbelief. Want the fantasy creature to fly? Put wings on them. Still shouldn’t be able to fly? Why not, you got wings right there… like, what’s another good example… pegasus?” Kaito pointed out, getting through his food, “Horse with wings? Horses are heavy. Think if you put wings on a horse it’d actually fly?”

“Humans with wings.” Shuichi added in, perfectly content with this ‘debunking’ of magical creatures he had been assured were absolutely real by someone who would know, “Always see little statues and ideas that are basically just humans with wings. Even fairies are just miniature versions of that. But if you fastened wings onto our arms, we’d be hard pressed to ever start flying. Again, too heavy.”

“I like Kokichi’s gas theory. Maybe if we put wings on Miyako, she could fly?” Maki smirked, playing with Miyako’s fingers, not terribly hungry herself, “She’s gassy enough.”

Kokichi nodded, interested in the conversation, but also interested in finishing his food, though he had slowed down a tad, his first ravenous bites finally starting to settle and reassure his brain that he was getting nutrients. Birds had hollow bones, which cut down on a lot of the weight they had to fight against to fly--sure, horses or people with wings could have hollow bones too, but that would significantly cut down on their durability, especially for beings that size. He supposed the answer then was just to get even bigger wings with more muscle, but drawings never showed it that way.

So...the real answer had to be something that they couldn’t easily see. As ‘real’ as this hypothetical subject was.

Snorting, Kokichi gave Miya a warm, yet slightly exasperated look. “I’m not sure if that kind of gas would be hot enough. Or that anyone would be able to watch in wonder, when they’re too busy trying to get away from stinky baby burps.”

“Mm, I haven’t gotten to them in the book, but did you guys get the stories about fairy dust too? Like...it’s just physical magic~ basically, and that’s how fairies fly… There’ve been a lot of deconstructions, though, based on other stories about fairies that it’s just stuff that gets you really high so you think magical things are happening, so fairies can show off without having to do anything.”

“Awww, that’s kinda lame, isn’t it?” Kaito said, scratching at his chin as he said, “I mean, if I snuck you LSD ‘Kichi, you hallucinating wouldn’t make me magic. It’d just… make me a dick, more than anything.”

“Let’s see if fairies are in this book.” Shuichi said good-naturedly, taking the book and looking for the index, finding ‘fairies’, and going to the corresponding page….s. Pages. “Hmmm, turns out there’s a few different kinds of fairies.’ Shuichi observed with some interest, going through the pages, “A surprising amount. Guess ‘Fairy’ is a sort of catch-all term for a group of similar species. Let’s see… the little ones with wings was what I was thinking of when I made that reference, I’ll pick those.”

“Pixies, or ‘Teacup Fairies’,” Shuichi read, raising an eyebrow, “Beware: Pixies are extremely impulsive, but excessively powerful and adept with dimensional magic. Pixies can create, furnish, and contort pocket dimensions with incredible ease, and will use this access to pocket dimensions to play pranks and confuse other beings. Pixies cannot trap you forever in a pocket dimension, as sustaining one dimension takes concentration and effort they cannot keep up indefinitely, but to the person trapped inside, it can feel like considerably more time than it actually was. The opposite has also been known to be true, a fairy choosing to keep a being within a dimension for a hundred years, it feeling like a blink of an eye for the person in question, but this is considerably more difficult and incredibly rare.”

“Forms of protection: laws of protection. Fairies are a strange mix of extremely chaotic and dutifully lawful. If their species has signed a treaty within the local landscape to ensure certain codes of conduct, they will follow that treaty to the letter. If pixie mischief is plaguing your land and your people, the suggested course of action is to send your local leadership to the leader of the pixies harassing you (WARNING: the leader may not be a pixie, but a different form of fairy, or not even a fairy at all! Be prepared for anything, and DO NOT insult the leader by acting surprised or dismissive!) and have them establish a new treaty for the landscape more suitable for everyone involved. And be aware that even when that treaty is established, pixies are mischievous by nature, and are impulsive to the point of cruelty. Make CERTAIN you understand the laws established in the treaty to the letter, so that a pixie cannot harm or fool you with a workaround…”

“Is there more?” Maki asked.

“There is, I was just reading ahead.” Shuichi said, giving the pages a curious look, “It goes into their body size, the weakness of their physical body but how difficult it is to catch them. This book is written in a surprisingly practical way, really. Based on the dragon story, I thought it’d be more fanciful.”

“See, if your dandruff was LSD, I’d still say that was magic, even if whatever I hallucinated didn’t happen,” Kokichi pointed out. “Though...people don’t call that kind of toad with the smile that can make you trip balls magic. It’s just kind of a neat fact, I guess…”

Polishing off his food, and heading over to start warming up a bottle of nectar for Miya--nearly nine on the dot--Kokichi listened with rapt attention as Shuuichi read out the section on fairies. Or...two small pieces about one of the many varieties of fairy in the book…

...pocket dimensions? How would that even…? That kind of followed the lore about fairy rings, though…

Huh. Their social contract was a literal contract. How about that…

Getting a fresh cloth ready and settling it over his shoulder, Kokichi came over to Maki and Miya as he nodded excitedly. “Right? When I was reading it with the kids, pretty much all the sections are written like that. Like...it’s half-way written like a travel guide, and half taxonomy--it’s why I was so interested in getting it. Of what I saw, the dragon section is the only one that’s more of a specific lore story, rather than the matter-of-fact guidebook stuff.”

Giving Maki a nod, Kokichi smiled lightly. “I can take her so you can eat. Gotta let little miss have her breakfast too.”

“I was planning to pass her off to one of you in a moment anyway. I’m pretty certain her diapers full.” Maki said, still smirking slightly as she passed her to Kokichi, Miyako wiggling her arms in delight: warm mental paps! Warm mental paps! Still sucking on her pacifier as she looked pretty pleased, as much as a newborn could.

“Awwww… ‘Kichi, if you feed her, I’ll change her diaper right after.” Kaito offered, still seeing the strain in his husband, “I’ve got you, babe.”

While Kokichi returned Maki’s smirk, there was a certain tiredness in his eyes as he, for a moment, couldn’t decide if he should feed her first or change her, but...thankfully, Kaito provided a recourse, and got Kokichi back into action. He settled Miyako steadily in his arms--...yeah, likely a full diaper. How much could she go in three hours?!--and, for a moment, just held her close, despite everything, his heart still overflowing with fondness.

Hopefully that was enough to appease her as he gently tried to replace her pacifier with the bottle nub.

“Thanks, hun…” Kokichi smiled up at Kaito for a moment. A little beyond being more aggressive in doing everything himself when it was his shift--and considering that he chipped in when it was one of the others’, they all probably felt that way on some level. “I suppose it’s exciting she’s so active today. I know she won’t really start to recognize us and, like, smile ‘n stuff for a few months, but...she really does have a personality already. Our little Miyako...gassy and tired and hair-pull-y and cuddly and all.”

“She’s just a little lady who knows what she wants.” Kaito grinned, watching as Miyako fought Kokichi pull of her pacifier like the devil, sucking at it with more urgency as her brow furrowed. Her face crumbled as Kokichi finally managed to fiddle it out of her mouth, and Miyako’s whole face pouted in outrage… before smoothing out when it was replaced with the bottle. Content to return to suckling, all right in the world again as she ate, “My little fussy princess.”

Shuichi and Maki passed each other a look.

“...” Shuichi adjusted his cap uncomfortably, before saying softly, “Um… Kaito? Can we… talk about that?”

Kaito glanced over at Shuichi, “Talk about what, handsome?” he asked, like he didn’t know… but the exhaustion on his face was so immediate and grave…

Shuichi lost his courage. “Nothing, nevermind. Lost the thought.”

“Oh, well… when it comes back to you, just let me know.” Kaito said, finishing his meal, before going to put his empty plate on the platter. “Done with your plate, handsome? Maki?” he asked, going to collect them.

“There ya go…” Kokichi sighed, glad that that whole exchange went down without a meltdown. It kind of just seemed like the kind of thing that would happen that day. He could at least relate to her about having a small stomach, and, just like he did, she would one day learn to regulate her meals. But until then, he’d fret every time she started bawling at meal time, knowing that her tummy would just start to ache from emptiness and make her more upset until they managed to convince her to eat.

Fussy little princess indeed.

...Kokichi glanced up, seeing the sudden tension in the room. They couldn’t always back down from difficult conversations, but...it had been a rough morning. They could put it off for a little longer.

Chuckling softly, Kokichi gave Kaito a nod. “I don’t think I can manage to polish off the ceramic, yeah. Thanks for getting breakfast, you two.”

“Happy too, happy too. You sure you don’t need more, Kokichi? I can go get you more! You still seem a little… well, it’s a quick trip down and back to get you another plate?” Kaito offered, taking Kokichi’s clean plate and putting it on the platter as well, giving Kokichi a hopeful look. Always looking to encourage Kokichi to eat a little more, slowly crawling back to a healthy weight.

The corner of Kokichi’s lips quirked up and he couldn’t help glancing over at Shuuichi, knowing that his boyfriend would be smug to see his prediction playing out, even if it was a pretty easy one. But just like Kaito trying to encourage Kokichi’s appetite was predictable, Kokichi rarely had the heart to deny Kaito when he looked so hopeful. “I don’t think I could eat another full portion, but if you find yourself back down for seconds, I won’t say no to a little more. Thanks for offerin’, hun.”

“I’ll go grab you some fruits and nuts after changing time, then.” Kaito decided, saying nothing of the idea of seconds, just deciding to do it. “Shuichi? Maki?”

“I’m going to head to my room in a moment.” Maki said, “Weapon cleaning time.”

“No thank you, Kaito… though I could take another cup of coffee, thinking about it.” Shuichi realized, “And could you help me with my bandage when you come back too?”

“Heck yeah! Baby change, fruit run, bandages! All about it!”

“Oh,” Maki recalled, looking to Shuichi, “They passed a message to me when I was downstairs. Dr. Ford was still planning to stop by tomorrow and was wanting you to send a message back confirming.”

“Ugh… nnngh.” Shuichi said, looking displeased, “...do I have too--”

“You won’t be busy! I’ll send Dr. Ford the message saying its good to go, no worries handsome!” Kaito said, grinning a little fiercely as Shuichi twitched, “Diaper change, swing by the messengers, fruit, bandages!”

Kokichi laughed softly, careful not to jostle Miyako with the motion. “Looks like Dad has his whole morning figured out already, huh? Always the busy bee. Hopefully you won’t be awake for most of it--it’s been a long morning for Miya too. Little Miyas need lots of sleep to grow up big and strong and be taller than Daddy by the time you’re thirteen. I’ve already accepted it, it’s too late.”

Sighing with a small smile, Kokichi looked back up at Shuuichi. “It’ll be good to talk with him again. You know that. We’re in the middle of a really big life change--if nothing else, it really helps to have someone to talk to about that. Or even just bitch to, without having to worry about pissing someone off. And you can always call the appointment short if you need to--you’re gonna be here anyway, so it’s not like you need to make a walk back through town.”

“I suppose so… I was just enjoying the time off. I forgot what it was like, having no one poking into my brain all the time… not!” Shuichi’s eyes suddenly widened, “Not that its a bad thing! Not a bad thing, no, not at all, there… is a lot of upsides, to someone having insight on the mind! I think! Right, Maki?”

“Huh?” Maki said, before realizing, “Oh, uh… Yes. Lots of benefits. Very useful. Not worth developing a crippling complex over.”

“Maki.”

“What? I’m agreeing with you. Thank goodness for… people like Dr. Mariah and Dr. Ford. Who can practically… read minds. What a gift.” Maki said, deadpan. “Not a bad thing.”

Kaito glanced at Kokichi, raising an eyebrow in a ‘what the fuck was that??’ motion, before saying, “Uh, are you two… good?”

“Yes.”

“Fine!”

Kokichi watched, a little baffled. He knew Shuuichi wasn’t wholly opposed to going to therapy, and even personal therapy, and there was a comfortable middle ground they could live in where he wasn’t thrilled to go, but still would. And...even if he still had issues, Shuuichi and Maki both had been more overt in their skepticism rather than trying to appease Kokichi’s Dicean ideals.

Looking just as bewildered, Kokichi gave Kaito a slight shrug as they met eyes.

“...there’s something to be said about the experience and familiarity, that lets therapists like them recognize issues, but...mind reading is kind of what they’re always telling us to stop, yanno? You can’t expect someone to know what you want, or even how you see the situation unless you speak up,” Kokichi hummed, nodding decisively. “Still...it’s nice they can get the gist of what you mean when you have trouble explaining things sometimes, huh. Or just with anyone, I guess. It’s nice being on the same wavelength as someone.”

“...yes,” Shuichi said carefully, before amending, “But… in theory, if… the mind-reading was agreed upon and understood--”

“And assuming it was accurate? And difficult to stop.” Maki added, “You can’t punish someone for something they can’t actually help… well, you could, but if you like that person to begin with it’s not recommended. Have to sort of work around it after that.”

“Yes! Exactly, it’s just another thing we all have to work with, and communicate through, and it’s not a bad thing.”

“I am… so lost.” Kaito said, grinning uncertainly, “What does that have to do with therapy?”

“Oh, Kaito, I think Miyako’s ready for her diaper.” Shuichi pointed out.

Kaito narrowed his eyes at that… before shrugging, “Sure, why not. Great distraction, handsome, you totally got me. Come heeeere, let me have my baaaaaaby, dirty stinky baaaaaby.” Kaito said, having slept well for the six hours he had managed to sleep before Shuichi’s shift was over at midnight, and just in a weirdly good mood all things considered. Getting up and heading over to Kokichi, he gave him a kiss on the temple and said, “Let me have my stinky baaaaby.”

…

He’d tried to relate it back, but… Kokichi looked between his friends in bafflement and slight concern. It sounded like they were trying to appease him? Or something?

(...he really loved them. His silly boyfriend and sister… Man, they were dorky, but he adored them.)

Shaking his head a little, Kokichi sighed and pressed into Kaito’s kiss slightly before gently handing over Miyako. “There she is… I’d say, hopefully she’s too tired to get upset about a change, but I think she has unlimited energy for that.”

“...alright,” he nodded to himself. “I’m gonna clean myself off a little while you’re changing her, but then I’ll be right back.” Peering in, Kokichi gave their daughter a playfully serious look. “Be good for Dad, alright Miya-Miya? No holding anything in until the moment we secure the new diaper this time.”

(He adored her too. Even if she did try to prank them with her diapers.)

“Oooooh… no promises, I’m sure.” Kaito said dryly, stealing one more kiss from Kokichi before watching him head to the bathroom. When the door closed, Kaito went to lay Miyako on the changing table, starting to undo her diaper… “So, uh… are you guys going to tell me what all that was?”

“It wasn’t anything.” Shuichi said softly, “Maki and I have been talking about various therapy things and we just got caught up in some new ideas. But, it’s… still a work in progress.”

“Mind reading is okay if you can’t help it.” Kaito echoed, glancing over his shoulder, raising an eyebrow, “Really?”

“We explained it badly.” Maki said, as Shuichi sighed, “Don’t worry, we plan to bring it up to the next group therapy session.”

Shuichi looked surprised at that-- they were??-- but refrained from saying anything as Kaito actually looked more at ease with that. “Alright… well, if that’s all it is. I guess it’s pretty cool you guys are kinda discussing therapy stuff together. I know you don’t like it all the time, but I appreciate how involved you guys have gotten! It’s… man, it’s been really helpful for me and Kokichi, you know? Way more helpful than I thought it’d be.” Kaito sighed, kissing Miyako’s feet real quick as he coo’d at her, “Dad’s got a little rock that makes it a little easier for him to not punch things, M~iiiiya. It’s a good rock. I’d show it to you, but I do not want you to put it in your moooouuuth.”

“And Kokichi… he’s night and day, man, since he started therapy.” Kaito continued, wiping Miyako down as she kicked at the air, keeping it together so far, thankfully, “That medicine he takes, the sessions...I don’t like to talk about it when he’s around, but it’s...it’s like he had this filter over his eyes? When I first met him? And everyone was like this scary monster and the castle was a cage and everything was a nightmare, and now? Totally different. It’s incredible. He loves everyone, he’s so relaxed, I don’t see him constantly scared that someone’s gonna drag him to his room or they’re gonna hold him down in medical… it’s such a relief.”

“Yeah. Don’t need all four of us with rampant overwhelming paranoia.” Maki said, getting up and stretching, glancing at the book, “...on that note? I’m going to go clean my weapons. Knock if you all need anything. Don’t need anything.”

“Kay. Love ya. Bye Maki.” Kaito said, unable to wave at her as she left, hands full of wiggling baby, “Shuichi, you mind watching Miyako while I go run for the message and fruits?”

“Sure.” Shuichi nodded, “She’ll probably want to sleep soon after this, so I don’t mind hanging around the room while Kokichi showers.”

“Thank you, handsome.” Kaito coo’d, finishing the diaper and kissing Miyako’s feet again, “He’s such a good dada… and he’s gonna do his therapy session with Dr. Ford in good faith, because it’s good for him, and a good opportunity, and if nothing else, it’ll make dad happy that he tried. Will it? Yes it will. Dad will be very proud of Dada. Yes I will~”

Shuichi rolled his eyes. Message heard.

Shuichi tapped against his ribs, staring at the ceiling as Kaito prepared to start his shift, Kokichi blinking sleepily as he was jostled Shuichi and Kaito trading places, burrowing himself into Shuichi’s shoulderblades. Kaito, yawning still despite his time asleep, started to feed Miyako, who barely woke up this time as she was picked up, not even opening her eyes as she suckled at the bottle. “Sleepy baby…” Kaito murmured sleepily, “Such a sleepy baby…”

Shuichi, who had been thinking feverishly while on shift, looked at the exhaustion on Kaito’s face…

...this might not… be helpful…

...but he wanted too so bad.

“Kaito,” Shuichi called out softly, “You know its okay to nap between feedings, right? Kokichi and I both do it. Sleeping at the chair next to her crib, waiting for the alarm to go off again?”

“Mmm? Yeah, I know its okay… I just don’t like to do it much myself. Always worry I might sleep through it.” Kaito murmured, “I’m okay, handsome. I just need to wake up a little.”

“Kokichi? You think its okay for Kaito to sleep between alarms, right?” Shuichi asked, glancing down at Kokichi, who might?? Already be asleep??

There were things Kokichi wanted to do that day, not even just the indulgence of sitting down with his magical creature book, but...as soon as mid-morning came and Shuuichi took over, the only thing he did was trudge over to their bed and collapse right into it, taking no more than a minute or two to fall asleep.

And he’d been dead asleep, right up until he felt Shuuichi climb in too.

And he’d probably be right back in a moment, but he was just aware enough to note that Shuuichi had said his name, so…

“Mmmrf…” he mumbled into Shuuichi’s back, gently draping his arms around Shuuichi’s middle as he cuddled in more. “S’okay… Kai-chan...wakes up if it’s even raining a little harder than usual… He’ll wake up at the alarm…”

...it was just that kind of day, really. They all seemed to need the rest.

“Mmmm… maybe…” Kaito said, taking a deep breath, his own eyes barely open. “Gonna check on Tim and then… yeah, maybe. Might be a good idea.”

Shuich smiled a little, before snuggling in closer to Kokichi. Pressing a kiss to his forehead, he whispered, “I hope I dream about you tonight…”

Kokichi smiled sleepily in turn, feeling warm. That was really cute…

“I hope I do too. I love you.”

...well.

Even if they could all use the rest...it was a specific request. How could he say no?

Lounging in his room for a little bit, Kokichi waited until he figured Shuuichi would actually be asleep before heading over. He wasn’t sure if there was something Shuuichi wanted to know about--even if he was tired, Shuuichi still deserved to know all the things Kokichi couldn’t get to the first time--or if he just wanted to see him, but...well, he’d be there.

...walking in on that morning, Kokichi trying not to wince as he gently tried to get Miya to let go of his hair, was...less than what Kokichi wanted. Sighing, he leaned against their door as he watched Shuuichi’s memory. “I really should get around to that haircut…”

“Kaaitooooo,” Shuichi groaned into his pillow, “Go rescue your husband… Miyako’s attacking him…”

“Wha-?” Kaito grumbled, getting up quickly, though, “...ooh, ‘Kichi… hah, oh nooo, I’m coming, I’m coming. Miyaaaaa, noooo, that’s not how we touch daddy… oof, hold on babe, hold on.”

Shuichi watched with amusement as Kaito went to try to rescue their partner… and blinked in surprise. Suddenly not in bed, but watching himself in the bed, his other self watching Kaito try to distract Miyako, who seemed entirely content to just not let go of her prize regardless.

He glanced down at Kokichi, who was standing by his side, also watching this… it took a moment for his mind to catch up to what was going on…

And Shuichi lit up, “Can we grab Maki and go visit Kaito?” he asked, looking a little in awe of that idea, “Maki and I were talking about it and I promised I’d ask. It would be… such an experience!”

Looks like Shuuichi was catching on quickly--about as well as Kokichi had at the start, and Shuuichi didn’t even have the benefit of being an Empath. ...he wondered if there were any...issues that could come up from being visited by an Empath so often, but...Kokichi could only think that Shuuichi would have more presence about his own consciousness which...might be an issue with his anxiety sometimes, but…

...he could ask Alter Ego later.

At Shuuichi’s excitement, Kokichi couldn’t help but smile, but it softened soon after. “...I try not to visit Kai-chan’s mind, Shuu-chan. I’ve been a few times, to check on conditioning, but...it doesn’t feel right, when he doesn’t know what’s going on. He hasn’t consented to it.” Kokichi raised a playful eyebrow, nudging Shuuichi’s side. “Definitely not very enthusiastic consent, to the point of making a request.”

“And Maki-chan…” Kokichi hesitated. Not sure how to broach the subject. She still was Maki, but…

...might as well go all in.

“You know the story of the last dragon from my book?” Kokichi started. “It’s written fancifully, and I’m sure it’s not the whole story, but...I know it’s at least in part true, because the last dragon was Maki-chan. Is Maki-chan.”

“...” Shuichi stared blankly at Kokichi, “.........?”

“What?” Shuichi finally managed, frowning. “I’m sorry… I don’t understand what you just said. Do you mean her nickname?”

That made no sense, but neither did the actual words that had come out of Kokichi’s mouth. So, between the two interpretations that both made no sense, Shuichi scrambled for the one that was slightly less absolutely insane. Because… obviously… that wasn’t what Kokichi meant.

Kokichi sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose a bit. “I know. It’s nuts.” Another sigh. “The last dragon was killed due to the propaganda of that species like the book said, right? But before she died, she made a deal with the God of Death and Trade--and, yeah, gods are real--to…”

As matter of fact he’d started telling the story, Kokichi faltered a little there. “...well, I’m not totally sure, I think something got messed up, but...anyway, the dragon was reincarnated as a human, as Maki-chan, but...like, dragons are powerful. More powerful when it comes to the mind than any Empath, even a weirdo like me. So...that consciousness is still a part of Maki-chan. And...in a new trade that Maki-chan made, she’s slowly getting her dragon memories back. But...you know, that means her dragon self is in her mind which...kinda makes things dangerous, even if I know Maki-chan wouldn’t hurt us.”

Shrugging a little, Kokichi looked at Shuuichi plaintively. “It’s why we haven’t gone to help her with her conditioning. Even with what the program managed to do, with her memories coming back, it’s no match for a dragon.”

“...........................”

“...........................................”

“..................................................... I am… still caught up on the ‘Maki is a dragon’ part.” Shuichi admitted, “..........the god of What!?”

Shuichi suddenly put his hands up. An uncomfortable but intense look on his face. Frowning as he tried to organize his thoughts on this. He had been hoping to not only do something he thought Kaito, if he knew what was going on, would be delighted with, but also was hoping to give Maki-- who had been taking Shuichi’s word for everything-- definitive proof that he and Temp weren’t fucking with her, even if she said she didn’t need it. She trusted Shuichi… which made this next thought…

“...Is… is this something Maki was trying to hide from me?” Shuichi asked softly, “Why wouldn’t she tell me?”

Kokichi gave Shuuichi a soft, understanding look and pressed to his side. “She’s not. Her memories are coming back slowly, even more slowly than mine are, ‘cause...well, I’m taking a god’s word on this, that it’d be just...way too overwhelming. The way...they? I’ll go with they; were talking, I think the timescale is...like, over years.”

Even softer, Kokichi put a hand on Shuuichi’s shoulder, squeezing gently. “...it’s like me not telling you I’m an Empath myself. She doesn’t know. If she did, she would tell you, I’m certain.”

Shuichi put his hands over his temple and rubbed them, closing his eyes… “...should we tell her? I… that’s a big thing to just… not mention? For years? I… would it hurt her to tell her? Hey, Maki, you are a dragon, um… expect some memories about it in a few years? Oh, I need to sit down…”

Shuichi went to sit down on the bed, ignoring the other Shuichi and other Kokichi laughing lightly at the now resolved hair pulling incident, as Kaito went to go get changed to go work out with the kids.

“....why is she a dragon?” Shuichi asked, before shaking his head, “I mean, you just said… some sort of old trade… are there more dragons? Is that common? Are people just dragons sometimes?”

At that, Kokichi faltered again. He hadn’t had to think about that since...well, how could he tell her? The only time he knew, he’d only be able to tell her in a form she obviously already knew that. But now...now he knew how to tell people things in their sleep that they’d remember--though Kokichi had a feeling part of that was willingness to believe on their end--and now Shuuichi knew all this and he could tell her when they were awake. It was...a decision Kokichi couldn’t make before, but now…

Shaking his head a little, Kokichi joined Shuuichi on the bed. “...she was the last dragon, so I’m inclined to say no. And...from everything I know about Bathul, making a deal to postpone your death is a huge rarity. I know there’s some sort of...divine purpose to it all, though it doesn’t sound like it’s gonna affect our regular lives much--so don’t freak!--but...I think Maki-chan is unique.”

“...I don’t know...when we should tell her,” Kokichi said after a moment, his brow furrowed. “...I think we should, at some point. And...now that she knows about me, and that magic does exist and all that, it’s not a matter of just...trying to convince her of something impossible…”

Kokichi glanced up, giving Shuuichi a grin. “You gave Temp a hard time about that, when we made the deal to tell you. You had that confident, professional look on your face as you warned him to be con-vinc-ing,” Kokichi said, dropping his voice and clipping the word to match how Shuuichi spoke when he was in his element.

...but then his mirth dropped again. “...I dunno. I don’t know how to tell her. I don’t know if...showing her surface consciousness would...work? Or what…”

Shuichi’s brow pinched, subconsciously reaching for his journal and, now wearing his traditional blazer again, pulling it out of his inner pocket as he started feverishly scratching into it… before remembering, “Shoot, this isn’t real, I’ll just have to re-write later…”

Putting the journal away with a huff, Shuichi glared at the wall, thinking… “I asked to hear about all of this, based on what you keep telling me. And I understand why I did. I don’t like being left in the dark… and I don’t like being treated lightly… but did Maki make any specific requests? To know, or not know? I… I don’t want to keep a secret from her about herself if there’s any doubt at all that she would have wanted to know.”

“...but I don’t want to hurt her either.” Shuichi said right afterward, shoulder falling, “If remembering she’s a dragon hurts her progress in some way? I wouldn’t want that either… uh… this feels insane, but so has everything else… can we ask Bathul if it would hurt her to know?”

Kokichi smiled slightly. “...honestly, I’d think you writing it down here would help you remember it more, but...yeah. You wouldn’t have a physical copy. I’m sorry I can’t be more help with, like, mind logistics, but...it’s pretty confusing to me.”

...he sighed. Maki’s request...had been so very Maki. “...she just accepted the trade. Accepting her dragon memories and the responsibility that came with them in exchange for being able to break her conditioning herself, timeline and all.” Kokichi smiled again, kicking his legs softly off the side of their bed. “...it was the night of her birthday, actually? That’s why I got so emotional that night, I think; ‘cause I remembered some of it.”

After a moment, Kokichi blinked up at Shuuichi before looking a little lost. “...I’ve never prayed before. And gods aren’t really prone to answering back. I guess we could ask Temp and have him ask Bathul and hope for an answer, but...it kind of feels like the sort of thing a god wouldn’t bother with. They’re like that, apparently; not really bothering with our problems over here.”

Shuichi sighed, nodding his head at that, putting said head in his hands for a moment.

“...should I even ask why we’d need to ask Temp?” Shuichi said softly, “...wait… god of death and trade… he owns a funeral home… is it that simple? He’s just a worshipper?”

Kokichi looked out at their wall, something a little amused and a little embarrassed in his expression. “...he’s a Templar. The Templar, if what people call him is right.”

Barely waiting a beat for Shuuichi to process, Kokichi nodded, confirming his boyfriend’s thoughts that he didn’t even need to read to know. “Temp, the Templar.”

“...That’s very silly.” Shuichi said.

And a beat later, he stood up. Giving Kokichi a cool look as he said, “I’d like to go visit Maki. We should just tell her. I’m not asking a Templar who goes around calling himself ‘Temp’ and named his child ‘Addason’ if it’s okay to tell her Maki’s own secrets. By that point, Maki would just be offended on principle, if I told her that I did that.”

Kokichi nodded, and after a moment snorted, getting up as well. “Oooh, Shuu-chan has his business voice on~”

Stretching, Kokichi nodded again. “...alright. We’ll go see her. But…” Again, the sheepish look returned, though there was a bit of worry on Kokichi’s face. “...you have to understand...bringing someone to someone else’s consciousness is...really difficult. And it’s already hard for me to talk to your surface level consciousness and have you...like...fully comprehend it.”

Rubbing his neck, Kokichi looked to the side, looking a bit insecure. “...I’ve done it, bringing a non-Empath into another non-Empath’s mind… Once. By accident. Which...was really astonishing, and freakish and concerning, and was the impetus for Alter Ego reaching out to me and starting to help me with my abilities… So...um. Bear with me, okay?”

Shuichi hesitated at that. “...we don’t have to. If it’s going to hurt you. I can always tell Maki in the morning. You won’t remember, but I will…” Shuchi sighed, taking off his hat and running his hands through his hair as he said, “We just sort of got all hyped up today on the idea of exploring what you can do, but… you’re my boyfriend, not an experiment or a gimmick. I don’t want to ask you to do something that will hurt you, Kokichi.”

“But… either way, I have to tell Maki all of this.” Shuichi said softly, staring at the floor, “I think… I would go insane. If I had no one to talk about this too. Honestly. I think I’d lose my mind… I don’t even know where to begin, with the idea that not only do gods exist, but you talked to one, and it wasn’t even the one I’m familiar with. Is Atua real? What does it mean, if both Atua and Bathul are real, and… Maki is a dragon… who made a deal with a different god… if Atua is real, does Kaito actually talk to him… oh my god…”

...aw.

Kokichi broke out into a soft, sweet smile, and for a moment he reached out for one of Shuuichi’s hands, holding it. “Thank you. That means a lot to me, honey. But…” He took a breath. “I want to at least give it a try. I’m kind of on Empath parental leave anyway right now, it’ll be nice to try something like this out. Even more when I have your and Maki’s enthusiastic consent,” he winked.

And while it was playful, it was easy for Kokichi to sober and give Shuuichi’s hand a squeeze. “I know… I’ve been very lucky to have wonderful friends to help me learn and process all this, and I’ve had months and months to do it. And even then I’ve blocked myself from knowing while I’m awake, so I never have to make real time, real world decisions about it. I think that’s why I’ve kept myself from remembering, anyway…”

A sigh, but Kokichi stepped closer, looking up into Shuuichi’s eyes. “But that’s not fair to you, and you don’t have the same resources. You share everything with Maki, and...I agree that she deserves to know too.”

“...but even if he can be silly,” Kokichi tilted his head, “Especially for the god stuff? Talk to Temp. He’s really knowledgeable, and he’s a really great friend. If there’s anyone with advice for navigating a world with incomprehensible questions, it’s him. Now…”

Kokichi looked around, biting his lip. He...wasn’t sure how to do this… For Shin and Kaede, he made a bridge that they could cross...Alter Ego said it was safer. It was letting their minds do most of the work...but they hadn’t been conscious of it. Maybe…

Kokichi looked back up at Shuuichi. “Can I make a tether to you? I’ll break it before we wake up, but...I think that’ll make it easier to actually bring you to Maki-chan’s mind…”

Temp the Templar… who even thought of something like that? So stupid…

Shuichi blinked, not sure what a tether was supposed to be, but… oh! Like the thing Tengan had used to track Kaito. Okay… “Certainly.” Shuichi said softly, giving Kokichi a curious look, “If you’re certain you’ll be alright? I’m still extremely curious how all of this works. I’d love to see any of it.”

Admittedly, Shuichi could see, now that Kokichi had pointed it out, that there were probably holes in his memory of the last time Kokichi had visited him. Like most dream logic, some of it slipped away from you when you woke up, and it didn’t necessarily feel like a ‘memory’. But Shuichi felt like he still knew mostly what had happened the last time Kokichi had visited, and hoped he would remember all of this as well as he watched Kokichi curiously.

Other Shuichi, yawning and waving, whispered, “Bye Kaito. Have a good morning…”

“Get some sleep, handsome! Have a good morning, Kokichi! Love you guys!” Kaito gently called back, before heading out to meet Maki and the kids. The door closing with a small click behind him.

Kokichi gave Shuuichi a small grin before closing his eyes. In a way...it was kind of nice, getting the chance to show off a little. Even if making a tether was probably the easiest thing he’d be doing that night.

Normally, Kokichi couldn’t see his own tethers. For most of them, he didn’t even know he had them, not until he was waking up in agony in the middle of the night, knowing that a terrible tragedy had happened.

He had seen tethers before. That awful ribbon around Kaito’s neck…

For the benefit of Shuuichi, and to be as transparent as he could about something so personal like this...this tether was visible.

It was more delicate than Kaito’s ribbons, almost soft looking, though you couldn’t touch it. Wrapped in cute little bows around their left pinkies, a small red string connected Kokichi and Shuuichi. Immediately, Kokichi could feel the breadth of Shuuichi’s confusion and fear and overwhelmedness, but also his soft love and ravenous curiosity. A burning desire to do right by his loved ones. He just...could feel Shuuichi.

Opening his eyes, Kokichi raised his hand and wiggled his pinky a bit, the string magically lengthening to not put any tension in the length between them. “Wha’dya think? They don’t all look like this, but I thought this was a cute one.”

Shuichi looked in open astonishment at the string around his pinky. Bringing it up to his line of sight, looking it over. It just… felt like a small wool string. Barely even that. Not wanting to take it off, but curiosity immediately overwhelming him, he took one end of the bow and pulled at it, curious to see if it would unravel. No… it didn’t so much as loosen. But it didn’t feel tight either… “Fascinating.” Shuichi marveled, running his finger along the string, watching it connect to Kokichi’s pinky. “...I don’t really understand what this is.” He admitted.

Experimentally tugging at the string, Shuichi observed it with an analytical eye, “I know it’s a metaphor. Alter Ego said to think of everything in metaphors, and I’m taking that advise to heart. But… does this mean we are connected?”

Kokichi giggled softly and nodded. “Basically. It’s like...something to help me keep an eye on you, so to speak. I can feel...you, however you want to define that, through a direct line--I don’t need to search it out, and you don’t need to be feeling something strongly for me to pick up on. It’s less exciting on your end, since you shouldn’t feel anything but...yeah!”

“My thinking is...it’ll help me bring you to Maki-chan,” Kokichi nodded, crossing his arms as he explained his thought process. “Like holding hands trying to cross old stepping stones, you know?”

“That said…” Kokichi took a breath. Reaching out to a dragon was...daunting, even if he knew Maki wouldn’t hurt him. He supposed that’s just what a presence like that was like. Okay...Maki was familiar to seek out.

Concentrating for a long moment, long enough that Shuuichi might feel compelled to ask Kokichi to finish his thought, Kokichi nodded at their bedroom door. “...I need you to knock. I’m...basically making a bridge between you two, but I need you guys to open the doors,” he explained, voice slightly strained. “She’ll probably think it’s a dream, but...we’ll get there when we get there.”

Shuichi was a little surprised he had any agency in this situation, let alone that he was going to be the one to knock. But… he had asked for this under the assumption he could trust Kokichi. And he did. So…

Shuichi went to knock on the door, feeling a little silly as his habits reminded him he was on the wrong side of it for knocking… but his eyes widened as, after a moment, it opened--

Maki was awake.

That was the initial problem. She hadn’t gone to sleep that night yet. She was not, in fact, even in her room. She had gone wandering. She was currently out in the gardens, not having wanted to go far, but wanting some air in the warm night, her red eyes eyeing the flowers with dull interest when--

{Maki?}

Maki’s eyes twitched. She put her head to her temple, her whole back rigid with tension and stress. She looked around in confusion, brow furrowed, red eyes searching for the source of the noise as she grazed her fingertips against the throwing knives beneath her shirt…

{Hello, Maki… are you… okay?}

“...” Maki frowned, fighting her initial impulse, which was that someone was trying to fool her, because… she knew…

She tried saying aloud, “I’m sorry. I forgot. Give me… five minutes.”

{....five minutes for what? Maki? Do we need to go?}

Maki closed her eyes for a moment, “Five minutes, Shuichi. I’m coming. I promise.”

She hoped she wasn’t going crazy. She didn’t think she was. She stumbled a little, feeling… dizzy. She felt like she was two places at once, and she kept having to remind herself that she was in the garden. She went to sit at the base of a tree in the garden, laying against its root on the side opposite of the path, and she took a few steadying breaths, trying to not feel nauseous from the dizziness. Closing her eyes she calmed her mind. Sometimes you had to sleep when you could. Where you could. Even if enemies were nearby. Even if things were alarming or strange. Sleep was a choice, little lady! You had to make that choice, or suffer the consequences. Empty your mind… relax each muscle in your body… it’s time…

“Are… are you sure we shouldn’t go Maki?” Shuichi asked uncertainly, seeing the distant, dead-eyed look in Maki’s eyes, glancing around at the garden as he asked Kokichi, “You’re certain these are her surface thoughts? What is she doing in the garden? Or is she just… thinking about the garden?”

When the door had opened, they had walked into the southern castle garden, and Maki had been looking down at the flowers when Shuichi had gotten her attention. She had split into two, one part of her looking vaguely in Shuichi’s direction, the other still looking at the flowers but now also rubbing her temple, a confused look on her face. And the one that was looking at him seemed… fuzzy. Like she wasn’t quite all there.

Now she was sitting at the base of tree, closing her eyes and, as she did so, the garden faded away. Maki still sitting there, but now all of them in darkness as Shuichi looked to Kokich in concern. “Is this how this usually goes?”

Kokichi was very glad he hadn’t decided to try portalling them in. Even just making a bridge, which was, at most, glancing against Maki’s consciousness, was putting a strain on him. He supposed it made sense--if a dragon didn’t want someone poking around, they wouldn’t get the chance to.

Still, he couldn’t help letting out a small sigh of relief as Maki accepted them...mostly. But any bit of strain gone was a boon he’d take.

“Sorry...sorry…” Kokichi breathed, his body still tense, though his expression was more furrowed in concentration than any pain. “I told you...I’ve never tried doing this while keeping people aware… It’s a lot easier when it’s basically a dream to you two…”

...with Shuuichi, it was...kind of like scooping up a goldfish from a tank, like that festival game Kaito liked. But...Kokichi didn’t think Maki-Dragon would take so kindly to being grabbed...and he wasn’t sure he was big enough to even catch her.

...so he had to beckon. And hope that she allowed it.

Kokichi let out a small gasp, coming closer to Maki’s conscious projection. “...Maki-chan… You and Shuu-chan said you planned for this… Please let me. I promise I won’t do anything you - hah - you don’t consent to...but I need your help for this to work. I’m not going to fight against you.”

“Shush.” Maki mumbled. “Just be quiet for a moment.”

Honestly… the men in her life just couldn’t take a hint. Five minutes she said. She just needed five minutes. She wasn’t perpetually exhausted taking care of a baby right now, she had to force her body to want it. Ridiculous that this being of vast mental power couldn’t take a simple verbal cue that she was…

“...trying to fall asleep, you idiots.” Maki continued, eyes opening in her mind, glancing up at Shuichi and Kokichi in the darkness, her red eyes glowing there, taking a deep breath that was slightly too… loud. Like an animal growling as she huffed, “And calm down, Kokichi. I can smell your sweat from here. Are you projecting the scent of sweat? That’s an odd choice.”

Maki stood up in the darkness, stumbled a moment-- another low growling noise ripped through the darkness-- as she tried to get steady with this incredibly unfamiliar situation, as she stared into the void of darkness. She could smell Kokichi. Smell his… effort. (Power.) He reeked of it… sweat. Was the only word that she could equal it too. He reeked of it. Dense, massive, nourishing…

“Maki?” Shuichi called out, sounding nervous.

Maki turned those fierce, glowing red eyes, bright in the darkness, on Shuichi, intense… before she blinked. Something settling in her. Easing.

The darkness around them suddenly, in the blink of an eye, became a mountain side with a beautiful view. Maki sighing, cracking her neck left, right… and when she looked at Shuichi and Kokichi again, her eyes weren’t glowing anymore, and her breath wasn’t coming out in roaring rasps as she said in the light of the beautiful day, “Sorry. It was early enough in the night that I thought I would have more time to go to bed. It’s only midnight, and I knew Shuichi’s shift only ends at midnight.”

Shuichi didn’t say anything, still just trying to comprehend the little things he had just witnessed as Maki looked around at the mountainside, “...this is the mountain side west of here.” Maki realized, “I brought Tim here to see a hot spring beneath it. It’s pretty here… but I know I was just in the garden. So, this is it, huh? This is what happens when you ‘dream’, Shuichi? Kokichi?”

...honestly, it was a little hard to judge things in Maki’s mind. Kokichi thought that she had been asleep, but...if she was awake, that was a good sign that this would be easier than it currently was. He gave her a sheepish grin and a shrug. “I’m not trying to, sorry.”

...he couldn’t help it. The shiver going down his spine at the growl that vibrated through the darkness. His proverbial heart speeding up in fear. A primal fear, something that Kokichi didn’t feel much in his life, but he recognized. Prey standing defenceless before predator.

But Maki was his friend. His sister. Someone precious to him, and him to her. He was hers.

(Maybe one day that deep faith would be a mistake, but it wasn’t today.)

Again, Kokichi let out a sigh of relief as the mountain appeared before them, feeling Maki accept him and, thus, letting him relax. His bridge, especially with Shuuichi, more or less, ‘hitching a ride’ with him, becoming a passive sort of effort that Kokichi could do more easily.

Another sigh, and Kokichi ran a hand through his hair, his shoulders dropping their tension. “Hey, Maki-chan… Yeah, pretty much. This is uniquely your dream, though… Or maybe just a place you feel comfortable…’daydreaming’ about. Sorry, I…” Kokichi closed his eyes, shaking out his head a little.

“Shuu-chan, do you mind startin’ to explain? I need a second…”

Maki frowned at Kokichi’s stress, before with no hesitation she went up to him, taking his face in her hands forcing him to look at her. Tilting his head left, right… her eyes narrowing slightly at the tension in the turn…

Shuichi looked around in astonishment as, immediately, the setting changed, and they were at the pond outside the wall, frogs croaking slightly as Maki said, “Put your feet in the water, the coolness of it will soothe you a bit. You look overworked.”

Shuichi looked around at the pond, the air feeling fresh and blowing pleasantly against them, a warm sun occasionally blocked by clouds, a strange… sense? Of the kids nearby, playing, without actually seeming them around. A deep sense of peace here. “...I didn’t realize you liked this place so much, Maki.” Shuichi said softly.

“I like to watch the kids play from the top of the wall.” Maki explained simply, gesturing idly to where she usually sat. “They don’t notice me most of the time. No one ever looks up. But its a place to relax. Sit, Kokichi. Cool down.”

“That’s incredible that you managed to do that.” Shuichi said softly, “I can’t move anywhere in my mind. Kokichi has to move me around for me.”

“Does he? It felt natural to me. Our minds should be under our own control, after all.” Maki frowned, feeling odd to even explain it aloud. It seemed like common sense. A natural impulse. It was her mind. Of course she could navigate it as she pleased. Who was to tell her no? “Shuichi, maybe you should sit down too. You have that look on your face when you’re in the middle of an investigation and come across a bit of evidence that ruins your established theory. It’s annoying.”

“...Okay, well, no. I’m not confused by what I just saw.” Shuichi huffed, feeling mildly insulted, but sitting down as Maki instructed, adjusting his cap as he said, “So, clearly, you’re misreading my facial expressions. I was just… surprised. Not confused.”

“Oh, sure. Huge difference.” Maki said, rolling her eyes, as she also sat down, laying back on her hands with a sigh, tilting her face towards the sun, “...is this actually happening? I know it is. And asking you two is maybe useless even if it isn’t. But this feels impossible. Maybe I’ve finally lost my mind. Always was just a matter of time, really.”

It was a familiar comfort, having Maki put her hands around his face and inspect him. And while he couldn’t say he was wholly expecting her to be able to manipulate her mental landscape...it did make sense. Even if she couldn’t remember much...Maki’s...being wasn’t just a memory. She was a human, but she was also a dragon. And...as far as he knew? Dragons were masters of the mental world, just as much as Empaths were. Probably in different ways, but...when it came to themselves, it probably acted the same.

Looking around fondly, Kokichi followed her instructions and shucked off his socks, dipping his feet into the pond, the water cool and refreshing, but not shocking in its temperature.

...that had been really difficult…

He looked over at Maki with a small smile before copying her stance, letting the memory of the sun warm him. “Shuu-chan and I talking to you through your mind is real. Our surroundings, how we’re seeing them, is about as real as anything you remember is real, but we’re not actually physically there. As Shuu-chan’s learning, and you probably heard from Temp, too, a lot of what you “see” in the mental realm is metaphor. For me, and for a lot of people, apparently, it’s just easier to act that way than deal with the physicality of it.”

“...somehow, I feel like you’ll be better about thinking about the physicality of it. My mentor’s like that too.”

Temp had called it metaphors, yes, though Maki hadn’t quite grasped what he was trying to say in the moment. She looked around at the pond, and… she could hear Timothy and the girls. Playing. Timothy actually sounding genuinely happy, not just impressed or proud or confident, but actually sounding like he was enjoying himself. Maki came to watch whenever she could manage it. It soothed her. Hearing her son actually relax for once… that was what this whole place felt like. A place it was easy to relax.

This place wasn’t a specific memory of her coming here, it was her wanting Kokichi to rest in the feeling of peace. Literally her feeling of peace. Hmmm…

“...I have a question.” Maki said.

“Already?” Shuichi mused, taking off his hat. It felt okay here to do so. Loosening his blazer as he stared in amusement at the frogs. “That was fast. You sure you don’t want to take a moment to process us just being here?”

“How come I can smell you both?” Maki asked, looking between the two, “I don’t have a sense of smell like this in real life, but the scent of you is almost overpowering in here. Kokichi smells… like a long workout by an extremely built, muscular individual. And Shuichi…” Maki sniffed, looking curiously at him, “You smell fresh. New baby after a bath smell.”

Shuichi laughed at that, giving Maki a fond look, “Probably the ‘just having had a baby’ thing.”

“Maybe.” Maki said, not sounding convinced, “You smell like Miyako. Not like you were just holding her.”

“...I don’t see the difference. But I’ll take your word for it.” Shuichi said softly. “Maki, I have so much to tell you. And I don’t know where to begin. I almost don’t want to say anything. It’s all… so much. And… it’s occurred to me that this is selfish. Putting all of this one you just because I don’t want to be alone with it…”

“....do you wanna die?” Maki frowned, “What, are you suggesting I can’t handle it?”

“Ugh, no, I just mean… it’s a lot!”

“But you already know?”

“Yes.”

“And you don’t want to tell me because you think I can’t handle it.”

“No.”

“It really sounds like you want to die.”

“You wouldn’t touch me.”

“Bet.”

“I dare you.”

“I’ll fight Kaito. We’ll go right back to sparring.”

“Liar. It’s dancing forever for you two, from now on.”

“Dance him to death.”

“I’d like to see you try.”

“You think I couldn’t? It’d be easy to dance Kaito to death. He puts all this extra unnecessary energy into these little flares and insists on picking me up all the time. He’s easy to outlast.”

“He’s pass out, not die.”

“I’ll give him another earring.”

“Jokes on you, I like the earrings.”

Kokichi gave Maki a curious look, though he didn’t interfere with the siblings’ banter. She could smell them, and Kokichi smelled...powerful, and Shuuichi smelled new… It could just be that Shuuichi was new to all this, having any sort of awareness about magic… She could smell them. Huh…

...he didn’t know, really, all that it meant to be a dragon. All they had were stories. But...being vastly powerful both in the physical realm and in the mental one...having control over her own consciousness (which, honestly, would make visiting her, and having the three of them together much easier), and being able to sense...essentially, others’ souls… That was just the start of it, he knew.

While their banter was their way of communicating, Kokichi did speak up after a moment. “Shuu-chan. She already knows the start of it--even if it’s a lot...isn’t it worse to be kept in the dark when you know there’s more there? And she deserves to know for her own sake, too.”

Now that they were there, now that he even had the option to...he wanted to tell her. He wanted Maki to be prepared, to not be caught off-guard by herself like he was. It wasn’t Kokichi’s choice, not really, to not know that he was an Empath. To not know, in the waking world, everything that he was explaining now to his friends.

And look where that got him? Thinking he was going insane, hurting his loved ones…

Maki was even more powerful than him. She deserved not to be caught off guard.

Maki’s eyebrow twitched. Giving Kokichi a concerned look. “Why are you afraid for me?”

She wasn’t sure if that was right. She could just… again, the best word she had for it was a scent. They reeked. It wasn’t a bad smell, but it was impossible to ignore. They radiated it. If she closed her eyes, she would know exactly where she was in this place.

(If she closed her eyes, she’d know exactly where they were in her mind, at all times.)

And Kokichi smelled… nervous was wrong. She didn’t know how to define it. He smelled like someone from the audience watching a trapeze act, and wasn’t quite lost in the spectacle of it enough to not be aware of what would happen if the trapeze artists fell. He smelled like a parent who had just watched their child pick up a loaded crossbow by mistake. Like someone watching someone who if they miss-stepped, that was it, it was done…

Her eyes trained on Shuichi. Aware before he started that he had decided to explain.

Maki listened to an impossible story about dragons.

She listened to a story about gods with terrible names. Death and Trade. Bathul. The name meant nothing to her, but she could smell the seriousness Kokichi had when it was mentioned. Bathul. A trade from an ancient dragon, the last dragon of Luminary, for… they didn’t know. They didn’t know what the trade consisted of, who had given what, or what had been paid or sacrificed. But that an ancient Luminary dragon, her species on the verge of a successful violent extermination, had made a trade…

...and now Maki existed.

“Maki,” Shuichi said softly. “You’re a dragon. The actual Last Dragon of Luminary…”

“...” Maki frowned.

She sat in the grass a bit. Where… was the danger… where was the danger. Look at this situation for what it is. Panic later, if there’s time for panic. You need to look at it first. Where was the danger. Truly? What was the most dangerous thing about this situation, as she understood it.

… a dragon, some time ago, had made a deal with a god… and some time later, Maki was born. And the danger there was…

“...that’s incorrect.” Maki believed. Looking down at her hands. “And it’s a dangerous misconception. I’m not a dragon. And I’ve never been one.”

Shuichi looked uncomfortable at this, and she smelled {she’s in denial} off of him as he said gently, “Maki… Kokichi’s seen it. With his own eyes. You were a--”

“He saw a dragon from a long time ago who is apparently unaware that it is dead.” Maki huffed, looking distinctly unimpressed, “A dragon that made a bunch of deals that I am unaware of to get to pretend to be alive again. That’s not me. Even if perhaps I’m a byproduct of that decision… I’m my own person. My name is Maki Harukawa, I was born in Luminary twenty-two years ago, and I’ve made my own decisions and choices and trades in that time that have nothing to do with anyone from any number of hundreds of years ago. Centuries ago, it sounds like. And any decisions made back then I am not beholden too. I’m a separate… entity. Maybe not…” Look at the situation for what it is. Be honest with yourself, “...entirely human. But in no way a dragon either.”

She sniffed the air, and smelled the worry and concern… and snarled, “And if I am able to do things a dragon can do? That still just makes me Maki Harukawa, but… with dragon inheritance. At most. I am no one’s placeholder. I don’t care who says otherwise.”

When Maki denied it, Kokichi paid attention to the very specific words she said. And...it intrigued him. Wondering what he had misunderstood from it all…

...but as it turned out, he hadn’t misunderstood anything. After all, his first words to Maki when she inherited the first of her past memories were that she was still herself.

He smiled a bit, making no attempt to mask the affection he felt for his sister. “Maki-chan is Maki-chan, right down to it.”

“Though…” Though he was being a little cheeky about it, Kokichi was...a little nervous about getting into something he hadn’t been able to tell Shuuichi yet. “I’m glad you’ve decided to use that dragon inheritance to protect Miya. Even if you scare the pants off my mentor.”

After a moment, Kokichi blinked and sat back, letting out a puff of air in a laugh. “That’s why she was getting so excited… Even if you’re not a dragon, you sure look like one sometimes, and even Miyako can see that. She can barely even see, Maki-chan, she knows us by heat and smell.”

Shuichi and Maki, both taken off guard, stared at Kokichi…

“See? This is why I had to tell you. He keeps just dropping bombs like that.” Shuichi whispered to her, Maki nodding her head warily as Shuich said, “He dropped the whole ‘god’ thing just like that.”

“I’ve done… what?” Maki asked, though… even as she asked…

It hadn’t been there before this point. But Maki was suddenly just aware of it. Something in her hand. Something she was holding protectively. It was a mass, a physical link, but it was also pure energy. Too difficult to show the other two as it currently was, and the more Maki looked at it in her hand, the more visual it became, flickering into existence, forming a metaphor they could all understand…

Maki was holding Miyako’s lamb doll.

And the second she looked at it fully form, she knew that she was holding it so that nothing else could. No one else was allowed to touch it. To grab onto it. This was one of her responsibilities. This was hers.

“...” Maki frowned, looking over the doll, something not quite… memories but… an impression of, “There was vines in the dark. People trying to grab her… I could smell them coming. I knew I had to… do something. That I could do something. So I reached out, and… the vines came and… I felt the heat building. The heat always building in my chest, uselessly burning at me and... I finally, finally knew what to do with it…”

Maki raised an eyebrow, “I think I ate someone.”

Kokichi sighed softly. He knew it wasn’t exactly tactful, but...there was so much. He couldn’t keep telling Shuuichi to brace himself every few seconds for the next world-shattering revelation, and none of it made sense without getting into two or three other things… He knew he could probably just give the knowledge over, but that would probably be even worse to try and process through. At least this way it was a little metered out, and given a narrative.

After a moment, Kokichi felt the urge to look down...so he did. And he smiled softly at what was there. Now that was a cute tether metaphor. He’d tell Ikuo when he could--his dad would be touched.

Kokichi had the intention to explain more from what he understood of Miya’s birth--though it was fascinating finally learning what went down--but a laugh bubbled up out of his throat, even as he shivered.

“Maki-chan,” he laughed. “I’ll always be thankful for you doing that, and I love you, but fuck that’s terrifying.”

A few more notes and he ran a hand through his hair, letting the peace of the pond hold him. “...Flora. Apparently...for average-sized Flora, it takes five months for a baby to...make themselves known? I guess? To the others… We’ve been working for a way to protect the kids, working with that timeline...but none of us expected that she’d be...yanno, big. None of us even knew what that meant, at the time, apparently it’s rare enough…”

Kokichi sighed and ran his hands over his face, lying back in the sun. “...you saved her, Maki-chan. I don’t have reason to believe they’d hurt her, but...thanks to you, she gets to grow up as herself. Learning in her own way.”

Kokichi’s eyes watered a little. “Thank you.”

Shuichi looked wide eyed between Kokichi and Maki, still taking a moment to process, but… he looked down at the plush doll in Maki’s hand and said after a moment, “Thank you, Maki.”

“I feel a strange urge to say ‘it’s nothing’.” Maki admitted, giving the plush another fond look, before sighing, closing her hand and watching the image disappear, returning to energy. “But it’s not. I’m relieved I’m doing that too, honestly. If I really do have an old dead dragon relative living in my head somewhere, at least they’re being useful.”

The sheer amount of judgment in Maki’s voice, when literally describing the choices of a creature that was so monumentally powerful that the other species made a deliberate effort to drive them to extinction… and Maki treating it like it had a long way to go before it would really start to impress her…

“Wow,” Shuich laughed, suddenly putting his hands in his face, “This is insane. You’re insane… it’s incredible. Is this why you’re like this? Because you have… dragon blood? In your veins?”

Maki pouted, brow furrowed, cheeks puffing out, “No,” she said, sighing, “I told you already… that’s incidental.”

“I’m Maki Harukawa.” She explained, looking absolutely certain. “That’s just who I am.”

Kaito had nodded off at the window seat.

He hadn’t meant too. He was just… really tired. Every time he went to sleep, it was like he had only blinked, and he was awake again, and… sometimes he felt a little better? But for the most part he didn’t. Like he was only getting a second wind, rather then actually rested. He was so tired…

But he didn’t feel comfortable falling asleep. What if something happened while he was asleep? Kaito had read in a book that babies sometimes cried because they were struggling to get oxygen in their lungs. Kaito had read that you had to keep infants on a flat surface because sometimes babies choked on themselves, unable to breathe because their bodies had twisted against itself in the wrong way. Kaito had read that sometimes babies just died, and no one knew why it happened.

She wouldn’t… she wouldn’t… he had to keep an eye on her. He had to be watching. It was when he stopped watching when all the bad things happened. All the bad things happened when no one was watching. All the bad things happened when no one else was around. He had too…

Saint Madison heard the screech again, and decided, Okay.

Enough of this.

Kokichi looked over, the sun shining down on Maki and bringing out the red undertones in her hair. Maki was fiery...but because she was Maki. And not even a dragon could change that.

His lips relaxed into a grin…

Before his eyes widened and he sat up in a start.

“I have to go.”

Looking at his friends with a worried determination in his eyes, he tried to quickly explain. “I have a system where Kai-chan’s defence can notify me if someone’s trying to get in his head, or just, yanno, generally bad things are happening, and she’s notified me now, so I gotta go. Shuu-chan, I’ll drop you back off.”

“What?” Shuichi asked, looking startled, his head fogging as he tried to force his urgency through the peaceful feeling of this place… but he didn’t have to fight it long, as Maki frowned, and they were suddenly in her training dojo back in Luminary. Weapons on display and ready, the echoes of people grunting, kicking, and yelling, blades and crossbows hissing through the air.

{Focus. You need to prepare for danger.}

“Can we help?” Maki asked, standing up and brushing off her skirt, long pigtails trailing over her shoulders… before Maki frowned at that and, pushing her hands through her hair, the pigtails fell out and her short hair returned. She kept the skirt though, as she said, “There’s danger in rushing in blind and alone.”

...Kokichi thought for a moment. He wasn’t alone in this anymore…

“...you two know Kai-chan better than anyone. If it’s that kind of problem, you’ll be able to help.” They were capable. Maki had the potential to stand toe-to-toe with even incredibly powerful Empaths, even if she didn’t have the experience to wield it as well as she could. Shuuichi didn’t have the power, but he had the best mind of anyone Kokichi knew, and if it was a Kaito-specific problem, Shuuichi would be the best person to find an answer.

Kokichi gave them both stern looks. “But if I say you need to go, you go, alright? This stuff can be dangerous, not just for you and me, but for Kai-chan too. And we don’t stick around to chat. Saint Madison’ll prolly kick us out anyway, but no fun stuff until Kai-chan knows when we’re all awake, and he can consent to it. Okay?”

Already, though, Kokichi was preparing to send them over, relying on his guess that Maki would be more like going over with another Empath, than having to bring Shuuichi over with more force.

“...Agreed.” Maki said, though she didn’t like it. Still, she hadn’t survived this long by not listening to the dire warnings of more experienced fighters, and in this case, Kokichi was the more experienced fighter. If he said run? Well, then she should run.

...she didn’t know how to run from a mind, but she’d burn that bridge when she got to it.

Besides, if it was as easy as walking through the opening Kokichi made? Well, then… it’d be easy to walk back through that same opening. It just made sense. The door didn’t just close after Kokichi was done with it. If it did, Maki would be dead. It always had to be open to connect her back to her body…

Yeah. That made sense.

And to Shuichi, who none of this came naturally too, he just uncertainly nodded, “I mean… if I can? I promise to not get in the way… is it potentially Tengan?”

“What!?” Maki asked, outraged, “Tengan?”

But neither of them had a chance to finish that conversation, as they went through the opening--

It… looked a little like Dicean architecture, but entirely wrong.

And older. In some ways.

The floors were made of long, wooden boards, like was popular in Dicea, and the thinner hallways, with long, intricate images painted on the walls between doors, rather than pictures hung up on frames. But instead of regular doors, it was the sliding doors that they had seen at the hotel, and… even that was incorrect, because otherwise the material was all wrong.

The walls were made of metal and stone, instead of various shades of wood, and even the sliding paper doors seemed to be made of some sort of leather, rather then the type of paper-like fabric that they had seen at the hotel. And the wood on the floors were the wrong color, apparently made of some sort of dark oak, rather then the light coloring of maple trees.

Everything looked unkept. Cracks in the walls, scuff marks on the floor. The ceiling was both too high and the spacing still somehow oppressive. Lanterns were lit outside of the doors, flickering and sparingly, lighting the halls but still casting it into dancing, creeping shadows.

It smelled like mold, and looked entirely unlike anything either Kokichi or the Luminaries would be familiar with, but not without strong echoes of familiarity for all of them. Kaito’s mindscape creating a landscape, mixing and matching all the different kinds of places he had seen, and some that had been described, and some things purely only he had imagined, and made it into a… place.

And Saint Madison said behind them, “Ugly, isn’t it?”

Maki’s eyes dilated.

The throwing daggers were out of her hand the second she turned, eyes narrowing as the taller woman brought up a battered metal shield to protect herself, the daggers skidding off of it and shooting around her as she raced forward. Maki was impressed, most fighters, even experienced ones, taking a cautionary step back before correcting themselves, but the taller woman not hesitating to close the distance between them, which was what she would need to bring that chipped sword down on Maki’s head. Maki, in turn, rolled backwards, catching herself on her hand and, as her legs cartwheeled above her, grabbing the woman’s wrist with her knees, twisting hard as soon as she had it and trying to break the bones.

The taller woman, though, leaned into the twist, alleviating the pressure and spinning Maki onto her front as she did a full turn herself, bringing down her foot onto Maki’s chest and pinning her down, bringing up her shield to protect herself from the daggers that immediately flew at her face, moving to put more pressure on her- “AUUGH!”

Shuichi dug the taser baton into the taller woman’s back-- in between the space where her ill-fitting armor didn’t meet-- seeing Maki pinned. Where had he… even gotten it?? He didn’t know. He just saw Maki pinned and--

The woman laughed. Straightening up after a moment and shaking her body like she was shaking off the electricity. Looking light and happy for a moment… before her face sombered up. Coughing in embarrassment in how caught up she had been as she said, “Ahem… I see you brought Maki and Shuichi, Kokichi. I suppose they’ve come to give aid?”

Taking the familiar and twisting it… Kokichi frowned as he looked around. This wasn’t the fixed point of a lobby, and he couldn’t feel… This wasn’t Kaito having an unwanted visitor, this was a--

Kokichi jumped as a voice spoke behind them, but that wasn’t what startled him. It was the flurry of activity that followed in what felt like barely a second, Maki leaping into action and Saint Madison matching her move for move, and Kokichi could barely wail out an embarrassed, cautionary, “MmmaKIII-chaaaaan!” before even Shuuichi got involved.

Thankfully, Saint Madison had a sense of humor about it. She was partially Kaito.

Sighing into a facepalm, Kokichi nodded. “Yeah… We were talking when I got your pull. I thought they might be able to help…” He sighed again before looking up and around the odd...hall they were in. “...this just feels like a nightmare, though…”

…

Belatedly, Kokichi jumped again, gesturing from his friends to the tall woman. “Oh! Maki-chan, Shuu-chan, this is Saint Madison, Kai-chan’s defence. Saint Madison...well, you know them, of course.”

Still collecting herself from that bit of exercise, Saint Madison nodded, taking her foot off of Maki and offering her a hand up as she said, “I startled you.”

Maki narrowed her eyes… before nodding. Taking the hand and letting the taller woman help her up, saying, “Yeah, but that’s alright. I’m easily startled. Saint Madison… you’re one of Kaito’s saints. I don’t remember which one.”

“Patron Saint of Protection.” Saint Madison introduced herself, before saying dismissively, “Not that it’s relevant. I’m a defense Kokichi created to ensure Kaito had no unwanted visitors. And there are rules to this place. No one is allowed to be here without Kaito’s consent, not even his partners. This is not a playspace for any of you, and the only reason I won’t kick you out now is that his safety is in jeopardy and I need outside resources to handle it. That said? If you end up disturbing him in any way, or are not useful, or do more harm than good? You will be made to leave. There are no exceptions. This is my place and I will protect it.”

“...so…” Shuichi glanced at Kokichi, “You based her on Maki, huh.”

Around them, there was a sudden bend in the perspective, and the walls themselves seemed to mooooan, a fierce, chilling wind blowing through the bent hallway… before the walls straightened up, the wind ceased, everything returning back to normal.

Saint Madison sighed, “The only thing more annoying than the actual wind is how pathetically effective it is as unnerving him.”

Kokichi nodded seriously, as he always did to Saint Madison’s warnings--they were warnings made from his own feelings on the matter, after all--but huffed a little, pouting at Shuuichi’s complete irreverence. “She’s a part of Kai-chan, you know. So...we both based ultimate protection on Maki-chan.”

Watching in interest--and a little fascination, if he were honest--as the wind howled and everything became even more distorted, Kokichi nodded a bit to Saint Madison’s observation.

“...alright. Let’s go find Kai-chan’s projection--his dreaming self, essentially. But,” Kokichi turned to Maki and Shuuichi, “He’s not going to be aware this is a dream. He’s not going to be conscious that this is his mind. So...because of that, and because this is his mind, Kai-chan’s logic is the literal rule here. What he believes is going to overpower everything.”

“And I’m not saying that as a challenge,” Kokichi stressed, giving both of his friends a long look. “It’s not a matter of will. You could overpower him, say none of this is real and force him to accept it, but doing that is going to hurt him. You have to play by the rules here.”

Kokichi looked around. “...that said...this might be an opportunity to act like this is a haunted house...start making it less scary. Though hopefully us showing up will do that too.”

With a nod, Kokichi started down the hallway, letting himself navigate to where he could feel Kaito’s focus accumulating.

“Wait, wait… question.” Maki sighed, crossing her arms and tilting her head, “...what, exactly, is the danger here? He’s… having a nightmare. How does that affect his safety? If your defense is calling you for bad dreams, that might mean your defense needs fixing, not Kaito’s dream.”

“That… seems right to me.” Shuichi admitted, adjusting his cap, before looking up at Saint Madison… man, she was tall… “Um, Saint Madison? Why did you call us?”

“He keeps waking himself up.” She said simply.

There was a long pause. “...Kokichi, your defense is broke--”

Saint Madison scowled, “He’s been doing this for months, and it’s been starting to damage his body. I’ve let it go this long, but in this last week, under his own devices, he refuses to sleep at all because these damn nightmares wake him up every few minutes, and are only increasing in frequency and intensity. Even when he was sleeping, he wasn’t actually resting, his heart rate remains consistently high and his adrenaline runs through his body. Again, this week has been particularly bad, so I’ve tried locking him into his sleep schedule so that he can’t keep disturbing his own sleep by getting up and walking around, but that seems to only be making the nightmares worse, making his adrenaline run hotter, and increasing his overall exhaustion.”

“He’s becoming an insomniac because of consistent night terrors.” Saint Madison explained, “And I don’t know how to fix it. It’s damaging him.”

…

...so, the actual truth of it was...Kokichi was a busybody, and he knew it. If Kaito’s defence, one notorious for not wanting him to be there, had called him in to fix a nightmare, then, damn, Kokichi was going to fix that nightmare.

It was probably a good call that he brought Shuuichi and Maki then.

Kokichi’s face fell as Saint Madison explained what the actual problem was, not just a single nightmare. “...his anxiety… Why he gets up every night to go check on all of us… It’s been going on since mid-winter, I think…” He sighed. “I knew he was still doing it, and I had hoped he was talking to Miss Crystal about it… But if it’s getting so bad that he can’t sleep at all, and if it’s always coming from these nightmares…”

Kokichi went quiet, chewing on his lips. ...let yourself spread out...feeling everything… It was no surprise how much stress Kaito had, but Kokichi still winced, able to feel it, feeling the damage on his constantly stressed brain.

“...I think we still try to find Kai-chan in this nightmare, but...let him lead even more. Sometimes…” Kokichi furrowed his brow. Gaze a little unfocused. “...it’s not like there’s someone doing this to him. Not like there’s an actual monster to defeat. It’s all Kai-chan, and it’s all his worries and anxieties manifesting like this. But...sometimes if you defeat the metaphor, it really does help someone soothe their worries. But we’ll keep an eye out. See if there’s more to it than that.”

Nodding, Kokichi looked up at his friends. “I can take you guys back to your own minds if you want. But I know you care about Kai-chan, and you two know him better than anyone else--if there’s some solution to see, some reasoning that would help him, you two are the best for that.”

After a beat, Kokichi looked a bit nervous. “...Maki-chan, you said it was midnight? Then...we have three hours to do this, before at least one of us has to wake up to feed Miya.”

Maki and Shuichi glanced at each other.

“We said we’d leave if you said to run.” Maki shrugged.

“And you said you’d tell us to run if it was dangerous.” Shuichi filled in, even if Kokichi hadn’t strictly said that.

“Doesn’t seem dangerous to me.”

“Are you telling us to run?”

“Because if not… of course we want to stay.” Shuichi said softly, “Even if all we managed to do was let him get some rest tonight… that’s something. Right, Maki?”

“I’m betting we can solve this whole anxiety thing within the hour.” Maki bet.

“It really is fascinating… a chance to see what all of this is like...” Shuichi winced as Saint Madison was suddenly notably glaring at him, “But I mostly want to do it to help Kaito! I can want to do both!”

“I’m watching you.” Saint Madison said grimly… before sighing as another shrieking wind blew through the hall. “Ugh. Fix this.”

And with that, she was gone, and they were alone in the hallway.

Maki looked around the decrepit hallway, and said, “So… you said we should treat it like a haunted house?”

Kokichi smiled. That’s what he thought, and that’s why he didn’t push for them leaving. They weren’t cowards, and they loved Kaito fiercely. Even if this was all new to them, they would learn for him. And...maybe they would get to understand Kokichi a little better too.

As they started walking, Kokichi sighed softly. “...that’s what I thought initially, but if this happens every night and is a manifestation of constant anxiety...it probably wouldn’t help him to downsize.”

“...maybe we could be ghost hunters. Prepared to fight back at whatever this nightmare is. Giving him the tools to fight back too.”

“Huh… is it possible he won’t recognize us? Or, you said this place works by his laws… I guess his friends could all be ghost hunters if we convince him.” Shuichi mused, looking around.

“It’s funny, my sense of smell is gone here.” Maki realized, sniffing, “I guess, at least for now, that’s a skill limited to my own mind. Shame. Would have been useful…”

Ahead, at the T crossing of a hall, a ball rolled onto the floor. Maki and Shuichi watched it warily, before Maki looked over their shoulders quickly, making sure nothing was coming up behind them, looking back to the ball.

In the distance, a little girl, slightly translucent, walked into view, picking up the ball before staring at them with white, empty eyes. Something wrong with her neck, a lump jutting out painfully from the side.

Maki shivered. She recognized a broken neck when she saw one, and didn’t like to see it on a child.

The girl observed them for a moment, before giggling, running off with her ball and fading from view.

“Oh, I see… so this place is going to be terrible.” Shuichi muttered, adjusting his cap, the three of them bracing themselves as another shriek of wind raced through the groaning, bending halls… before Shuichi’s eyes widened. “That’s not wind. That’s a screech.”

“Anyone could be a ghost hunter,” Kokichi shrugged. “All we need to do is act like we know what we’re doing...it’s the confidence that’s going to matter to Kai-chan. And...I mean, he’s recognized me every other time I’ve come. Sometimes people don’t recognize me, or superimpose other people onto me, but Kai-chan’s always seen me for me.”

Kokichi shut up as he saw the ball, not feeling the need to start acting yet when they hadn’t even found Kaito yet, but a soft sorrow entered his eyes when the girl came out chasing the ball. Oh Kaito…

He frowned slightly at Shuuichi’s observation. “...it doesn’t sound like Kai-chan’s to me… So let’s focus on finding him first. And...here, ghosts are real. So...trying to convince him otherwise, talking about how Atua looks after anyone, is just going to freak him out into thinking that there are people left behind. So...I suppose we should just accept them as they are.”

Gently, Kokichi took Shuuichi’s hand. “...okay. Let’s find our guy.”

Kaito had an idea, of what Dicea was going to be like, when he was first coming with the Luminary party.

Crows! Cawing ominously in the distance their predictions of doom! A dark and depressing atmosphere over a cold and barren landscape-- unlike the valiant warmth and heat from Luminaries equally valiant and passionate citizens!-- that put a dark and ominous weight on its poor, indentured people! The buildings poorly kept and crumbling. The streets cracked and full of potholes as the weather endlessly battered the set upon citizens.

Kaito thought Dicea was going to be… brooding, was maybe the right word.

He hadn’t known, really, what Dicea actually… looked like. As they went further into the country, Kaito had started seeing the architecture change, and while nothing was quite as evil looking as it should be yet, the buildings they passed and the towns they rested in gave him a better idea of what the capital was going to look like before he got there. Obviously the metal and stone material was going to start showing up again the closer they got to the wealth of the capital, so he dismissed the mostly wooden buildings as the outliers of poorer communities, but… he supposed strange designs of the buildings would remain consistent. Just… metal and stone. And dirty. Poor. Poorly kept, poorly funded, Kaito had been warned Dicea was poor. That he’d have to adjust his standards a little out of necessity.

He hadn’t minded the idea. He was a hero! The good prince, sent to bear the heavy weight of peace for his kingdom! He could handle whatever they threw at him!

...technically he had been right about the cold. It certainly got cold in Dicea.

And Kaito knew that… something was wrong, as he walked the halls of the Dicean castle, looking around nervously. He was… pretty sure it didn’t look like this. He was… he was certain the hallways didn’t go on this long and… had the doors always slid?

He knew something was wrong, but… it’s not like he wasn’t going to believe his own eyes.

This was just what the castle looked like.

Kaito was trying to find the attic. It was vital he found the attic. If he found the attic, then Timothy was going to be safe. Timothy would be safe if Kaito found the attic. He was certain. That was the rule. He had to find the attic… he was Timothy’s prince. Kaito had to--

Kaito’s eyes widened in terror as he glanced upon a large, square mirror that was hanging in the hallway, and he looked up to see himself, and a massive man in armor, spiders falling at the end of the armor plating, a bony skull peeking at him from beneath the helmet, raising his sword to strike Kaito down.

“No, no,” Kaito thought he screamed, but only gasped out as he turned around, raising his arms to defend himself and staring out in terrified confusion as he saw nothing, but felt a cold chill run through him, like a breeze had gone through his clothes. Kaito’s whole body trembling as he told himself he hadn’t actually seen that… had he? Had he? He had seen it in the mir…

Kaito looked back at the wall, and groaned with his whole body when he saw there was no mirror at all, and the hallway just kept going. Tears pricked at the side of his eyes. Why was it like this? He hated this.

He kept walking down the hallway. Had to find the attic…

Really, Kokichi’s initial assumption of treating this place like a haunted house wasn’t that off. It was just...hyper-realistic and specifically catered to Kaito’s fears. Shifting hallways that stretched on for too long, and the only rooms were locked up tight, there to have suspicious, horrible sounds coming from behind them, or to slam shut seemingly on their own just out of reach. It felt dirty and decrepit, abandoned, in a way, except that horrible things felt right at home there.

And there was this sense of urgency, even if none of the things they saw moved particularly quickly. It was about the tension, he supposed.

...but Kokichi couldn’t help but think that this was all set-dressing. Just...horrible extras to add to the misery of this place. But...what the initial thing was, the “core” fear...Kokichi wasn’t sure. They didn’t have a clue what the “boss battle” of this place was…

Just find Kaito first.

It wasn’t really that they were blindly walking through creepy, just-out-of-sight terror halls, though. Kokichi had slowly been honing in, tracking down where he could feel Kaito’s focus until…

Kokichi let out a small sigh of relief, even if...the terrified person in front of them wasn’t the Kaito Kokichi regularly knew. Having the sense to call out gently, Kokichi raised a hand to softly wave. “There you are! Kai-chan, we’ve been looking for you--it’s easier to get around a place like this with friends, right?”

Kaito’s eyes widened, his back jolting, as he looked back at Kokichi, Shuichi and Maki, staring at them in bafflement. He had forgotten they existed in this context. Focused on Timothy in the attic…

...oh fuck.

Miyako.

“K-Kokichi?” Kaito asked, looking around in alarm, like the baby might be tucked away in some sort of corner as he said, “What are you doing!? You guys were supposed to be watching Miyako! What, did you get bored!?”

Kaito was outraged, staring at them in betrayal, his mind rapidly filling in a worst case scenario. They had left Miyako, Miyako was with the ghosts, Miyako was being eaten by a jaguar, she was--

“We asked Ikou to watch her.” Maki said simply, catching Kaito off guard, “So that we could come find you. You’ve been gone too long.”

“Did you get lost, Kaito?” Shuichi asked gently, “It’s understandable, this place is big.”

Kaito blinked rapidly, trying to process this… “Oh, right… I got lost…” he realized, looking around, “I got lost… looking for the attic. Timothy! Timothy. Is there still time!?” Kaito asked, looking at his family urgently, “Do we still have time!?”

...Miyako. Timothy. Kaito routinely got up to check on all of them, and while Kokichi hadn’t followed him out of the room...Kaito did leave every time.

Honestly, it seemed kind of obvious. Of course Kokichi knew that Kaito worried about their kids’ safety--they talked about it pretty frequently. But...that just made this more difficult. Because they had talked about it. They made plans and worked out systems to make sure that Tim was safe and frequently checked in, and that Miyako wasn’t left alone. And yet...it was still such a giant anxiety that Kaito literally couldn’t sleep, and had been compelled into rituals for months.

...this wasn’t the sort of fear or anxiety that could be felled by taking down a mental representation. This was an anxiety that constantly lived inside Kaito, and...just needed to be soothed until it was small and manageable. And that took time and a lot of work.

They could try to soothe him for a night, though. And maybe that would be enough of a foothold for Kaito to start working on it in other places too.

“There’s time, Kai-chan,” Kokichi soothed, his tone calm, but serious, not brushing off Kaito’s worry as something silly. Coming forward, he reached out, asking for Kaito’s hand, but not taking it. “Let’s head to the attic, then. Tim really is enamored with ‘em, huh. He and Chase really have a lot of fun together up there.”

(Tim’s okay. He has people to go to if he’s in trouble, and Chase is always with him.)

Kaito nodded earnestly, taking Kokichi’s hand and looking around, body still trembling because this place was wrong. The wrongness oozed from the walls… how could he help Timothy when he couldn’t even get a grip?

But his eyes darted to Kokichi nervously when Kokichi assured him there was time, and…

“...that’s right. Chase is with him. She’s a good dog… she’d bark if something was happening…”

Shuichi went to Kaito’s other side, and slipped his hand into Kaito’s, leaning his weight on Kaito’s arm. Not entirely understanding what was happening, but trying to follow Kokichi’s lead as he said, “...Cali and Kimiko are over so often. I’ve forgotten if anything was scheduled today, but are they spending the night?”

Were they? Kaito couldn’t recall… if they were, Kaito should make certain he’d put them into the attic too. They’d be safe there. Kaito was certain of it. If Kaito could just find the attic, the kids would be safe. He wouldn’t have let them down.

At that thought, Kaito felt a shiver run through his body, and the walls started to bend, a shrieking wind blowing through the halls that made Kaito brace himself against it, before his eyes went wide. Someone was screaming, where!? He had heard it, he had heard it, was it Tim? Miya wailing!? Maki fighting off some--

“I’m on it.” Maki said, taking out her blade and running towards the sound of the shriek.

Oh… right. Maki was here.

(And… honestly probably didn’t need Kaito to save her…)

Shuichi sighed, rolling his eyes as he said, “It’s alright, I’ll go with her. Make sure she doesn’t kill anyone.” he promised, letting go of Kaito’s arm and, his baton in hand, heading after Maki towards the far end of the hallway.

Kaito’s fear ramped up as he saw them go, getting farther from him. “Maki! Shuichi! Come back here! Don’t go too far, it’s dangerous!”

Kokichi nodded, a slight smile forming on his face. There were real signs. Chase wasn’t an incredibly heavy sleeper, and she was a great dog. If someone was trying to get in Tim’s room, they’d be able to hear her barking from the next hall over. Not to mention the person on nightwatch would be able to too.

However...Kaito didn’t feel very heartened by the mention of Cali and Kimiko, and as the screech went through the halls again…

Kokichi’s eyes snapped to Kaito as his fear ramped up again, and his face hardened. Squeezing Kaito’s hand, Kokichi started to walk after their friends, bringing Kaito along. Refusing to let him be paralyzed in his fear. “Always running off ahead… Then again, it’s always been out of love, right?” he half-asked Kaito, the question more rhetorical, just reminding Kaito of these things. “Maki-chan keeps us safe, even when there’s no danger. Shuu-chan keeps Maki-chan safe, watching her back. And Kai-chan keeps us all safe, making sure we have a plan to come back together.”

“Meals together, scheduling baby rotations, always talking with Tim about his day...Kai-chan is the home we come back to, you know?” Kokichi turned back for a moment, a loving smile and warmth in his eyes. “I can’t even think of any parents who are so involved with their family. Kai-chan really goes above and beyond, keeping track of us.”

Kaito let Kokichi lead him forward, staying close to his husband, his face pale and worried. This was what happened, Maki and Shuichi left and terrible things happened when they were out of his sight, and if Kaito wasn’t diligent Tengan was going to execute Timothy, he was going to kill the kid, Kaito had to do something, and Miyako was so small, she was so small what if--

He had to be hypervigilant, he had to constantly be on his guard, if he fucked up they were going to get hurt, they were going to die, he had to stay on top of it if he fucked up…

Kaito looked down at Kokichi, nervous tears still at the ends of his eyes… they did do that, but… was it enough? To keep track? To talk at meals? What if they didn’t tell him things? How could he protect them when no one…

But Kaito felt some of his doubts soothed as, as if just to prove Kokichi’s point, a moment later Maki and Shuichi came back around the corner, heading back to Kaito and Kokichi. “We had a look around. It was nothing. Wind going through the wood panels.” Maki said.

“...Are you sure? You guys really looked?” Kaito asked, brow furrowing in concern.

Shuichi raised an eyebrow, “Are you doubting the words of a royal detective and assassin? Kaito… come on, now. You know if someone was there, we would have seen it.”

“We didn’t see it for you.” Kaito said miserably.

“...” Shuichi tucked his hair behind his ear, before saying, “I took advantage of the fact that you would want to believe me, when I said nothing was wrong. I’m trained in manipulation and secrets, Kaito… and you all still found out in less than a week, anyway.”

“And I knew even earlier than that.” Maki reminded him, frowning, “Next time, when I tell you something is wrong? Don’t dismiss me. There. Problem solved.”

“I… I’m sorry--”

“Don’t be. I’m not asking for apologies. I’m telling you that if that’s what’s on your mind, it’s an easy fix. Don’t ignore your assassin when she says something is wrong.” Maki said, rolling her eyes, “And, yes. We still worked it out in...five, six? Days? Was when it all got really bad?”

“Barely five days.” Shuichi said quietly.

“I’d say, considering everything else that was happening at the same time, and that four people were actively hiding it from us? Let’s give ourselves some credit for working it out as quickly as we did.” Maki huffed.

“...but it’s so easy.” Kaito whimpered, looking around nervously, waiting for the ghosts in the walls to attack them again, “When you don’t know? When you’re not aware that something’s wrong in the first place? You find out years later and… and it’s too late by then and…”

Shuichi and Maki glanced at each other, before frowning. “...nothing is getting past us for years.”

“Besides,” Maki sighed, “We’re not even the only ones looking for danger. Kokichi? If you want to start talking about the castle staff now. Lake and Katsuki and, well, even Hajime these days...I’m sure it’s been on the tip of your tongue.”

...he was glad he brought Maki and Shuuichi. There was a lot Kokichi could reassure Kaito of, but...to almost everything, Kaito could counter with ‘what if they made a mistake?’ But Maki and Shuuichi...they were the kinds of people that could make bold claims, and Kaito would believe them. Because to Kaito, Shuuichi and Maki could do anything. Shuuichi was a genius detective, and Maki was invincible and vigilant.

They were firm constants in Kaito’s world, even if he was accepting their humanity in the waking world.

And while bad things happened to them...ignorance hadn’t lasted long. Even when everything was stacked against them.

Giving Maki a sheepish grin, Kokichi turned back to Kaito and nodded. “We’re not alone, Kai-chan. Tim and Miya aren’t either. When we were at the hospital? Ikuo was there the whole time, and people were constantly by--Shuu-chan’s room was filled with presents.”

“Haneda adores Tim. She’s professional, she’s not his mom, but she cares about him more than just a job,” Kokichi started, rubbing little circles into the side of Kaito’s hand. “They talk all the time about what he’s getting up to, and even from the very beginning she’s been keeping an eye not just on physical danger, but even people who would look at him funny for being Luminary. Even when he did nothing but run from her, she never gave up on him and threw in the towel--she’s always been looking out for him.”

“The others may not be as personally involved, but everyone on the guardforce, even the housekeepers and other staff, is dedicated to keeping everyone in the castle safe. Making sure we’re all comfortable and secure…” Kokichi let out a soft laugh. “But, yeah, Lake and Katsuki, Hajime and Waku...they’re our friends. Of course they wanna look out for us too. And believe me, Waku knows even if someone’s been sleeping weird by how their sheets are. Nothing’s getting past her when she’s on laundry duty.”

“She’s also got that heart reading thing…” Kaito said, always ready to advocate on Waku’s ability, even if he wasn’t entirely convinced she was actually hearing hearts, but was definitely really good at body language, “...do you think she can read the ghosts hearts? Do ghosts have hearts?”

“Oh, right, I forgot that’s what you think the issues is.” Maki realized, looking around, “Ghosts.”

“Metaphorical ghosts.” Shuichi nodded gravely.

“What about THAT is a METAPHOR!?” Kaito demanded, pointing with a trembling hand as the lower half of a translucent old man floated through the ceiling.

“Hmmmmm… Timothy’s not in the attic, right?” Maki asked, putting her hands on her hips, “I told him to stay with Ikou and Miyako. Kaito, we’re trying to do this together, right? You can’t just tell him to ignore me and go to the attic. I need you to back me up when I say something,”

Kaito blinked. “...oh. Right. Timothy is with Ikou and Miyako… oh, that’s… that’s my bad Maki. I… I don’t know why I wanted him to go to the attic…” Kaito looked around the weird hallway, before frowning, “...where are we? This isn’t the castle, is it?”

“Have you ever been to the fifth floor south wing?”

“No?”

“This is the south floor fifth wing, and it sucks. Let’s leave here and go back to our room. Miyako’s going to need to eat soon anyway, we shouldn’t leave Ikou to do it.” Shuichi said, going to hold Kaito’s arm again, “Lead the way, Kaito.”

“...this place does suck.” Kaito grumbled, “‘Kichi, you guys need to renovate this wing… its full of dead people. And the decor doesn’t match anything else.”

Kokichi sighed softly as Shuuichi and Maki just...totally broke the metaphor. But, thankfully, Kaito was calmed down a bit...sort of. Changing the subject when he started to freak out was a good call.

...and it seemed like it worked.

They were better at acting on a time limit than he was.

Sighing regretfully, Kokichi nodded and followed Kaito’s footsteps away from the dismal hall. “I know, it’s really bad. I think I’ll make it one of my castle projects--this isn’t exactly the kind of place good for a welcoming community hub, is it?”

Even as he lamented, Kokichi looked around Kaito’s back for a moment, looking over at Shuuichi and Maki. {I won’t remember in the morning. If his anxiety is this bad, he needs help. Talk to him about it, or therapy in some way tomorrow, please.}

Shuichi took that in, but looked a little bewildered by it, uncertain what he was… ‘hearing’ or how to respond.

Maki’s brows furrowed for a moment, and… she had a concentrated look on her face, like she was trying to do something.

{...}

… but it failed, and instead she just nodded. Understood.

The rest of the dream, as short as it was, was just Shuichi, Maki and Kokichi distracting Kaito with banter and light humor every time he started to get worked up again, calming him down as he focused on them. The hallways were still there. The ghosts still made him tremble and cringe away. But… it was hard to be scared when his family was literally circling around him, guiding him forward.

When he woke up, Kaito turned off the alarm, felt… really, really tired, a dream that was slipping from him immediately, just pieces and fragments and soon not even that. As he fed Miyako, murmuring soft songs to her, the thought raced through his head, Go check on Tim.

… Kaito went to the door and opened it, holding Miyako in his arms. He glanced down the hall. Would he hear Chase barking? The thought had never occurred to him before. Maybe not all the way down here, the walls were thick, but… the guards went down this hall all the time. They’d hear the dog bark, right?

… Kaito whispered sleepily to Miyako, “We’re just gonna listen outside his door for barking. Just a moment, Miya.”

Miyako didn’t leave the room very often… really not ever. So Kaito whispered to her that they were going on an adventure, as he walked down the hall and to the opposite corner hall, listening outside the door.

No dog barking.

...alright… it was fine. Chase would be making a racket if some stranger was in there. It was okay.

Kaito sighed tiredly, heading back to the room. The thought of double checking Maki’s room and the nursery not occurring to him today.

The first thought that entered Kokichi’s mind when Kaito shook him awake was an agonized, desperate, ‘Oh no, please no…’

And the second was, ‘OH NO!’

Kokichi had already been looking a bit pale and clammy in his sleep, but as his bleary, bloodshot eyes popped open, he turned positively green. In a mess of uncoordinated limbs, Kokichi somehow flung himself from the bed, aiming himself towards the bathroom, just needing to get there by some measure and--

“Hrrk, hurp, BLLURAAAAAAAURG--!!”

Right on the threshold of the bathroom, a good few feet from the toilet, Kokichi heaved, barely holding himself up on shaking, sweaty arms as vomit piled on the floor in front of him.

“?” Kaito didn’t get a chance to say, stepping back as Kokichi pushed past him, his small husband scrambling against the flooring and… Kaito winced as he heard the impact of Kokichi’s knees on the bathroom tile, a loud retching sound turning his stomach a little as he said, almost too surprised to be alarmed, “...oh.”

Shuichi, usually so hard to stir, shot up, eyes alarmed but bleary with sleep as he said, “Wha-? What’s--??”

“W-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!”

“...” Kaito scratched his cheek for a second, before his brain finally kicked in. Kokichi first, Miyako second, Shuichi third, and Shuichi could help with the second. “Handsome, could you pick up Miya, Kokichi… awww, babe… ah geez, yeah, Shuichi, just soothe Miya, okay, I’m gonna take care of Kokichi. Everything’s okay!”

He didn’t know if that was true, but a quick glance at Shuichi just showed him looking more haggard and alarmed, so… what was the harm in saying it. “It’s okay, it’s okay…” Kaito murmured, kneeling next to Kokichi, glancing at the vomit as he put his hand on Kokichi’s back and felt him trembling violently, “We’re going to the toilet, and when you feel empty, I’m taking you down to medical, babe. It’s okay, I’ve got you, you’re okay.”

...shit. Kokichi looked wrecked. What was happening!? He had been fine yesterday… a little stressed and tired maybe but…

...fuck.

Bright starbursts exploded in Kokichi’s vision as an earsplitting cry rang through his skull, and Kokichi could barely even find it in himself to be worried for how far down his emotions were under the layers of thundering pain going through his head. He felt a heat on his back, almost like being poked with fire, and he shuddered, even a familiar voice not bringing much comfort as his arms gave out.

Raggedly breathing, he horked a few more times, acrid water dripping from his lips.

Why? Why? Why did everything hurt so much?! It felt like his damn body was exploding…

Kokichi whimpered quietly, unable to keep himself together, and tears started to bead at his eyes, mixing with the sweat covering his pale face, back to a scary pallor from the sick tinge it’d taken on.

Thankfully Kaito was fast enough to catch him before Kokichi fell into his own vomit, jolting his arm beneath his chest and catching his weight as Kokichi’s arms gave out on him. Okay… okay…

“Alright, we’re going now then. It’s okay if you throw up more, it’s fine.” Kaito told him, not sure if Kokichi was even hearing him as he pulled Kokichi up, adjusting him into a bridal position and ignoring Kokichi’s whined, pained protesting sounds. If this was another migraine- and between the vomiting, sweating, trembling, and the way Kokichi was folding in on himself all suggested yes- then there wasn’t a way Kaito could move him that wouldn’t hurt. So better to be quick.

Shuichi had picked up Miyako, who was still wailing, and Kaito said to him, “Knock on Maki’s door for help. I’ll be back as soon as I can, everything’s going to be okay.”

Shuichi was staring at Kokichi, wide eyed and alarmed, before just nodding. A familiar strain in his eyes that made Kaito realize-- “Put Miyako back down! Now. Go sit on the bed!”

Shuichi looked at him like he didn’t understand what he was saying for a moment, before gently putting Miya down and going to sit down at the bed, still looking at Kokichi with that wide, strained look, his face starting to pale. Kaito quickly headed out the room, holding Kokichi close-- his husband looked sweaty and miserable and was still slightly covered in puke and Kaito was so damn thankful he had put a shirt on this morning because look! He was wearing a man sized face napkin!-- as he kicked at Maki’s door, “Maki! I’m going down to medical with Kokichi, Miyako’s crying and Shuichi’s about to have a panic attack! Help please!”

Kaito didn’t wait for her to come to the door, heading down the stairs and unsurprised but still relieved when he heard her door open and her head to his room without any further questions. Okay okay okay…

Kokichi could only shake as the searing heat enveloped him, unable to take it, but unable to move. He just wanted...he wanted to fall out of his body, not have to feel anything anymore, while everything was exploding and on fire and it felt like his head was a million pounds of concrete that was choking him, clogging all his senses and keeping him from any sort of equilibrium.

This was hell, he’d found it.

It was a migraine paired with extreme exhaustion, and starting to make him dehydrated, the healers said.

Ikuo still knocked, but he tested the doorknob right after, calling through, “‘s me, here ta help.” He hadn’t heard the screaming from upstairs, but someone who had seen Kaito rush Kokichi to medical had let him know, and Ikuo wasn’t about to sit by for another all day emergency.

Maki, to her credit, did not look hassled or overwhelmed as she held a still wailing Miyako and sat next to a hyperventilating, sobbing Shuichi next to her, ready to reach out and catch him if he passed out forwards rather than backwards as he gasped out, eyes wide and cheeks spotted, “h-aaaugh… killed him… I k-killed him… H-AUUGH--”

“You didn’t kill him.” Maki told him again, before looking over to Ikou and saying, “Good to see you. Kokichi took us mind hopping last night and it seems like it may have made him sick. Kaito’s taken him to medical. Shuichi is having a panic attack, he will be fine, but he may pass out before he’s better. Miyako, I’m assuming, is upset because everyone else is.”

Ikuo did look a bit surprised at the chaos, but it didn’t trip him up as he came towards the others, nodding at Maki’s breakdown. “Mm, tha’ happens. Used ta think it was jus’ anytime, but ‘Kich’s explained it as jus’ overdoin’ it. Like tryna sprint five miles after ya’ve been jus’ leisurely walkin’ fer months. Folks down in med’ll take care ‘a him, no doubt.”

Considering Maki wasn’t touching Shuuichi, that likely meant Shuuichi was at a “Red Light” right now, and as he came down he’d be more calmed with Maki right next to him. Ikuo could take Miyako to let Maki focus on Shuuichi, and...he probably would. But there were other things he could do to help too.

Nodding decisively, Ikuo gave Maki a bolstering look. “I’ll get th’ vom outta yer way, so it w’rn’t be stinkin’ fer ya. Then I can take th’ li’l miss so ya can help Shuu’chi. Yeah?”

At this, Maki did look a little genuinely relieved, having already put cleaning the vomit as an ‘eventually’ thing. Kaito and Maki knew from a lifetime with the guy that sometimes there was no stopping Shuichi’s ‘pass out’ panic attacks, that all you could do was ride it out with him, but they still stuck by his side to keep him from hurting himself by accident with them. And there wasn’t much to do for Miyako beyond just holding her while everything else settled down.

Vomit had been low on the list, but Maki was endlessly relieved as she said, “Thank you. There’s not much I can do for him beyond sit with him, but being able to focus on him will help, and… yeah, the vomit does stink.” Maki sighed, shaking her head. She owed the older man.

Ikuo gave her a nod and quietly dipped out of the room to get cleaning supplies, years of housekeeping skills ensuring that it would not take long.