“Oh, shit,” Kaito cursed, quickly hurrying inside, not sure what he was expecting to see that would make Doppio call to him for help, but, uh… He looked around, before admitting, “Okay, no, I have no guesses. What do you need help with? Something hurts?”

“We need you to push our beds together,” Arven explained.

“...what.” Kaito asked dryly.

Doppio put on his most pathetic expression. The kind of expression he had perfected, being too pathetic and pitiable in the face of homicidal maniacs and people with unchecked rage issues for them to even consider wasting the time to make him a target. 

“Please,” Doppio sniveled. “S’ too far.”

“I can’t do it cause I’m injured and Aceto’s sleepy, so it’s really your responsibility to do it for us, Kaito,” Arven said, sounding stern, in contrast to Doppio’s watery puppy eyes. “You need to do it so we can go to sleep already. Look at him,” Arven said, pointing to Doppio, “He needs you.”

Doppio nodded, already pretty melted against the bed. “If we tried we’d prolly fall out of bed ‘n have to sleep on the flooooor, ‘cause we couldn’t get back up,” he pouted. “I don’t wanna sleep alone…”

Kaito glared at the two boys, who both looked pitifully back at him. “...ugh.” Kaito grunted, running his hand over his face, “Fine, but only because I think you’d both be in for a rude awakening if you even tried any more shenanigans by this point. You’ve already nearly killed each other once, what are the odds you’d pull it off again?”

Heading to Doppio’s bed, Kaito gripped the framework, before pushing. Kaito was visibly strong, but Arven was still a little surprised at how effortless it seemed to be for the larger man, pushing both the bed and Doppio across the floor at the same time. Arven smiled, cheering a little as the beds connected, scooting closer and grasping Doppio’s hand. “Heeey! You made it! Good job, Aceto, I knew you’d get to me.”

“I literally pushed you together,” Kaito muttered, before crossing his arms. “Seriously, you two. We’re just waiting for Nell to bring back the supplies, and then you’re both going to sleep. Actual sleep. I’ll wake you for dinner, and then guess what? Back to sleep.”

Hopefully they were all fresh out of nearly killing each other. Doppio didn’t think he could keep Arven from adventure if he tried, Arven was just the kind of guy to do things, but if he could ensure his boyfriend’s safety for…forever? That’d be pretty cool. 

Doppio’s eyes widened a little and he clutched the mattress as Kaito…genuinely scooted the bed over several feet. Sure, the damn thing wasn’t, like, thick slabs of molded carve-work into wood…but it did look like pretty sturdy wood. The kind of thing that Doppio could probably move himself, but shuffling each end little by little. Not moving the whole thing with the mattress still on and with a person in it!

Still, he gave Arven a sleepy, pleased smile and squeezed his hand as he cheered, together once again. “I’d always try, mio tesoro. Thanks, Kaito.”

Sighing softly, he scooted over to curl around Arven’s side, not pressed right up against him, but comfortably near, before Doppio gave Kaito a sleepy look. “Sounds fine to me--you don’t have to repeat it.”

Kaito rolled his eyes, heading over to pick up Miyako. “I don’t have to repeat it, he says. You sure? We had to repeat not to lift heavy things a shocking number of times. Sheesh, Miyako, these brats, huh?” Kaito said, settling at the desk chair, putting Miyako’s carrier on his lap. “Well, I’m staying right here till she gets back, and you’re both gonna be asleep by the time I leave. Just repeating that.”

“Perv just wants to peep on us being close and cute.” Arven huffed, shuffling under his blanket before clinging close to Doppio. “His own husbands must starve him of affection.”

“Tsk. I was napping in my own room, and trust me, once they came back from whatever they were doing, I’d have gotten all the cuddles. Jerk kids, keeping me from my husbands,” Kaito muttered. “Just shut up and go to sleep already.”

Doppio smiled softly and closed his eyes, squishing his face into his cat pillow while he stroked his thumb down the side of Arven’s hand. This was much better. He was playing it up quite a lot but…well, he found he really did enjoy sleeping with someone nearby. Even if he’d still woken up in a panic one of the nights it was…better, being able to hear and potentially see people nearby. And, er, well, not just people, but specifically Arven. And Kaito and Lake had been okay, he guessed. 

“They were hanging out with us, actually, so you just mistimed it,” Doppio drowsily hummed. “Prince Shuuichi showed us his snake. He was really cool. Arven got a snake hug.”

Kaito looked a bit startled at that… before huffing, shaking his head a little. “Darn it guys…” 

Well, he supposed he couldn’t fault his husbands for it. They hadn’t been with these two for the last few days now, they couldn’t really be expected to understand why he, Lake, and Nell were pushing so hard for these two to rest. Dumb kids. Dumb husbands rewarding dumb kids’ behavior. 

“I did, I got a big ol’ snake hug,” Arven said sleepily, closing his eyes. Now that he was actually lying down, it was kinda easier to relax into the idea of going to sleep. “I think Nini liked me. He’ll like you too, Aceto, once we get you draped in some snake.”

Kaito’s nose wrinkled in slight distaste, though there was a distinct lack of shiver as he said, “Just be careful. Nini’s still, like, half the size of you. Don’t aggravate him or ignore warning signs.”

“We heard you have a fear of snakes, Kaito,” Arven admitted, “Why? They’re awesome.”

“Fear of big animals that eat tiny people being around the tiny people in my life is an entirely reasonable fear, thank you very much. Everyone’s just, ‘ooooh, Kaito has a fear of snakes’. Put Timothy next to, like, I don’t know, a panther or something. See if I don’t tense up,” Kaito grumbled.

“Hope so…” Doppio hummed. “Feel like I could’ve had a cheat code today with the heating pad, but I think it’d be more rewarding if Nini just chose to be around me on his own. Feel better about that than coercing animals with, like, treats ‘n stuff. Even if they deserve treats anyway.”

Opening an eye, Doppio raised an eyebrow, looking over at Kaito. That didn’t really sound like a phobia…but, then, he…Kokichi hadn’t said phobia, had he? Hmm… “...I think you have a poor judgement of size. But, also…just exacting reasonable caution isn’t usually something people call a fear. You don’t say someone has a fear of heights if they stay behind a cliff’s guardrail.”

“...having a fear of ghosts seems different, though, since there’s not really any…reason with that,” Doppio mused, closing his eyes again. “That’s just pure brain fear.”

Kaito stiffened at that, before sputtering, “Wh-who said anything about having a fear of ghosts!? I-I don’t have a– oooooh, heeeeey~” Kaito’s stammering and slightly panicked look was immediately masked over with a bright, happy smile as he spotted Miyako starting to shift around in her carrier, making little stretching baby noises as Kaito whispered to her, “Heeeey Miyaaaaa~ Miiiiiiyaaaaa~ Miyak~oooooo, it’s not awake baby time yet. What are you doing baby? Hm? Miiiiyaaaa~”

It was actually kinda tough to wake up Miyako when she was totally conked out like that, so Kaito was a little surprised to see her blink up at him… until he sniffed.

Ah, okay. That had woken her up. “Stinky, stinky, Miyaaaa~ do we need a new diaper? Yes? Well, dad’s got one in the baby backpack, come on, let’s go to the bathroom. Bathrooms are where little poopsie oopsies should go, Miyako. Yeeess, that’s where the oopsie poopsies–”

The door clicked shut behind him, Kaito still murmuring to Miyako in the bathroom through the walls. Arven wrinkled his nose. “...you don’t think he’s gonna leave the old diaper in there, do you?”

Nailed it. Not that it had been a particularly hard thing to guess. Kaito had basically confirmed it then and there when Doppio had slipped up about Amaina, and Kokichi talking about Kaito having multiple major fears was practically hitting them over the head with the answer. Still, for someone on the dim side like Doppio, it was satisfying to see it confirmed so solidly. 

But as Kaito so drastically changed tracks, Doppio peered over, watching as father and daughter fled to the bathroom. Sticking his tongue out a little at the possibility Arven posed. “I hope not. Practically a biohazard, need to properly dispose of stuff like that.”

“You’re more right than not,” Nell softly drawled, knocking gently on their door before coming in. Still watching Doppio jolt slightly in amusement…which was her feelings on seeing their beds pushed together as well. “I’m glad you two have gotten comfortable. Alright… Arven, do you usually move in your sleep? I can slip the ice pack into a compress if so, so you don’t end up kicking off the bed.”

“I do, yeah,” Arven said, making an effort to sit back up, if only because it felt more polite. “And would you mind passing me a painkiller, Dr. Pacuvius? I forgot to grab one when I first laid down.”

By the time Kaito had finished changing Miyako, putting her back into her carrier and coming out of the bathroom, Nell had mostly finished setting up the boys. “Oh! Perfect, thank you. They’re good to go then? Nap time a go? Because I promised obnoxious tucking in as a punishment, and it’s time to deliver then.”

“Sure thing,” Nell nodded. And she proceeded to get the boys set up, wrapping the cold compress around Arven’s foot and elevating it (even if he’d only roll off it, but some time was better than none), getting him a painkiller and a drink, taking the old heat pack from Doppio and giving him the new one, humming at the ingenuity of the bandages they’d used to keep it on him, though cautioning against burns, and…

Nell smirked a bit. “They’re all yours, Kaito. Still, I’ll just be in the medical ward if anyone needs anything--you know where to find me.” Not that she believed location was much of a factor, if the boys needed something quickly. 

Doppio, by this time, was already drowsing, holding his pillow to his chest and curled into it. He barely gave more than a hum, more just that he was registering Kaito’s voice than properly mortified by the prospect of being tucked in. 

“You were serious about that?” Arven grumbled, giving Kaito a wary look from where his head was half buried in his own pillow. “We’re not children, you know.”

“Entirely incorrect. You very specifically still are,” Kaito said, placing Miyako down, before heading over to the beds, trying to work out how this was gonna work. Guess he’d have to go either side. “And like I said, this is a punishment. You guys wanna act like brats? I’m gonna treat you like brats. And brats get tucked in.”

Kaito moved to Arven’s side first. Hmm… how did tucking in someone really work, anyway? In truth, the closest he really knew the idea was maybe accidentally learning how to do it for Kokichi, considering all the times he had to physically put Kokichi to bed, his husband unable to move. In practice, that couldn’t be very different to what people did to kids, right?

As for what you said to them, uh… he really only had Priestess Mery, for what came to mind to say to a fussy, sleepy kid. So, keeping her in mind, he pulled the blankets up to Arven’s shoulders, ignoring Arven’s exasperated look as he started to strategically tuck the blanket around him, as he said, “You lot made Atua work hard today, huh, running around after you. How’s he supposed to keep an all-seeing eye on you if you insist on running around like that?”

“Not very all-seeing if you can outrun him,” Arven muttered, shifting slightly beneath the blankets, admittedly feeling a little embarrassed at the fussing… but also, damn. It was warmer now. Arven wouldn’t have guessed he was letting that much air in. The warmth was kinda nice.

“Actually, do you have a god, Arven? Doppio?” Kaito asked, going around the other bed, smoothing out Doppio’s blanket before fixing it around his back, starting to tuck it in the same way he did the other one. “Atua still loves you if you do, but I could send out a prayer to them on your behalf, if so.”

“Not really… I used to daydream about being able to go capture gods, when I was a kid,” Arven admitted, blinking sleepily. “Put them in little snowglobes. Keep them as collections. There’s lots of really cool god myths out there, the thought used to fascinate me.”

“Weird~” Kaito grinned, pushing some of Doppio’s hair back, out of his face. “Love the ambition. Maybe don’t capture my god though. I’m kind of beholden to the guy… alright. Look at you guys, snug as a bug in a rug. Hah. Try to escape that tuck, that’s a darn good tuck right there… you all need anything before I go?”

Doppio hummed softly as he felt blankets around him being pulled up, covering his back and tucking around his shoulders. …had Boss ever done something like this for him? Probably not… He’d never seen him off to bed (reasonably, as Doppio was…uh, physically too old for something like that, and they were co-workers) and every time Doppio could remember falling asleep in the same space as Boss (not very often) he always just woke up exactly as he’d fallen asleep. 

…it was kinda nice. Combined with the heating pad, it really felt like he was basking in that sun that Arven said he smelled like. Just warm, soft, and comfortable…

“Non credere veramente in dio,” he sleepily mumbled. “Capo ha detto che era un maestro del destino… Non riuscivo a pensare a niente di più potente di quello.” (Don’t really believe in god. Boss said he’d mastered fate…I couldn’t think of anything more powerful than that.)

Doppio sighed softly as Kaito brushed hair out of his face, nuzzling more into his pillow. Humming, “Buona notta, Kaito-co.” (Goodnight, Kaito my friend.)

Kaito snorted softly, “Well, I recognized my name. Not gonna ask which insult the rest of that was, just gonna take the lick and move on.”

Arven gave Doppio a slightly surprised look at that… but decided not to correct Kaito. Just shuffling in and, admittedly, feeling a little better about things in general, as Kaito went to collect Miyako, double checked the room, double checked the window was locked, closed the curtains mostly closed, before heading out, saying softly, “I’ll bring back dinner. Get some rest guys,” before closing the door behind him.

As a peaceful feeling started to fill the room, there was a small, exaggerated yawn. And then Amaina popped out of the middle blanket, snuggling into Doppio’s side, before, dramatic little thing she was, she started ‘snoring’ softly. Arven chuckled a little at that, before closing his eyes and going to sleep.

-

Nekomaru stretched out onto the table, while beside him Kyoko gave him a dry look. “We’ve already been told we’re pushing our luck by staying this late. You want to extend our time?”

“Like you wouldn’t be making the same argument if that boy of yours hadn’t begged his dear mentor for a favor. It was so sweet, Kyoko. How many more opportunities we ever gonna get to come to the rescue?” Nekomaru said, smirking as he rested his head in his arms. “Ya know they’re gonna need you to lay down to make this work. Don’t think massages work with you sitting up all prim and proper.”

Kyoko shifted her leg across itself beneath her towel, unconcerned. “You did the favor. We should go. They barely want us here.”

“They want us here when danger’s around. They may not need us for anything else, but we’re still good for that. And those kids they decided to claim are already claimed by dangerous people. Shouldn’t leave ‘em, as their dangerous people.”

“Uh huh…” Kyoko sighed, “This has nothing to do with the Elia girl?”

Nekomaru chuckled on the massage table, “Like I said. If this was that boy of yours? You’d be doing the exact same thing.”

-

Kokichi sighed for the umpteenth time, tapping his feet a bit as he helped make up plates. Either way he had decided to help Kaito deliver dinner, because he wanted to apologize for earlier--he’d noticed the nerves and lows, but by the time Maki had rejoined them, the boys had felt…fine, honestly. A kind of mellow happiness that, admittedly, Kokichi had to focus a little more to even pick up. He hadn’t thought that they’d have so much trouble getting back to their room (Shuuichi said they had been walking around together just fine before), let alone for Doppio to give Arven a full piggy-back the whole way!

The boys probably wouldn’t really get why he was apologizing, but…Kokichi still felt awful, for not intervening. 

But that kind of led into why he had been sighing and weighing his options, not particularly happy with any of them. 

Kokichi had meant to talk to him about it regardless, but…Doppio had admitted in plain language to Kaito that he was feeling suicidal. They were keeping an eye on the boys, but…that was a huge warning sign. A call for help that Kokichi hadn’t used himself, but believed in being better for. So…it was something they should talk about! And see if they could make some arrangement for Doppio to see a counselor or therapist…at least before he started being assigned one by CPS. 

…but. The boys had also just had a rough day. And Kokichi knew very well how emotionally taxing mental health conversations could be. So…he didn’t want to pile on more to the heap the boys were already struggling to deal with. But he couldn’t keep putting it off forever…

“...they’re just meant to rest tomorrow, right?” Kokichi said, already having gotten it confirmed. “Maybe I should just try tomorrow…”

“Might be wise,” Kaito agreed, fixing up a few more plates on his end, though mostly he was in charge of keeping up the tray as his husband filled it up. “Though, you’d know better than I do. I know he, uh… well, made a pretty serious move, maybe. And said some pretty serious things, definitely.”

“But…” Kaito gave Kokichi a slightly wary look, “I don’t know if that puts us on a serious time limit… does it?”

Another sigh. Kokichi was doing his best to plate up a variety of things that both Doppio and Arven could eat, and…well, he wasn’t really sure the plan Arven had for Chief, but he kept an eye out for dog-friendly foods too. 

“It’s a little looser than a strict time limit, like, it’s not inevitable that Doppio would…make a serious move again,” Kokichi said softly, “...but if someone has those feelings? Then you have to act as if they could…choose to act at any moment. Get them help as soon as possible, and keep an eye on them as they recover. …I really doubt he’d…like, do anything while he’s sleeping, though.”

“Well, I still don’t think he was himself when he was in the tree. And, honestly? That alone might be a damn good reason to push him to a therapist. If only because a therapist might help him get through the fear of us talking to a healer about that. I promised this kid no experiments, and I mean it, but at the same time between the personality shifting and the memory stuff… I guess both my best and worst case scenario is that there’s some clog in an artery somewhere that can be cleared up with some medicine, if the healer knows about it.”

Leaning down to place a small kiss against Kokichi, Kaito said, “Look, I’m gonna follow your lead on this. But this guy’s got a lot of fears, and he can lash out sometimes. If he gets weird with you, don’t be surprised, but don’t feel like you just have to take it either. You're the heir apparent, and my husband, teenagers don’t just get to yell at you. Got it?”

“I don’t really think things like DID are caused by physical disruptions…but it would be good for him to get checked up on regardless,” Kokichi agreed. “I think…he’s a little more comfortable with Dr. Nell, but…well, he got through one check up today. We’ll see how it goes.”

And whatever the cause for…really any of Doppio’s issues…they’d figure it out. 

Snorting softly, but catching a kiss before Kaito stood straight again, Kokichi offered him a light-hearted shrug. “I think they get to yell at me a little, since I think it’s important to get through the amount of yelling teenagers are gonna give anyone…but I’ll stand my ground, hun. They were pretty sweet to me when we went out shopping the other day, anyway.”

Still a little undecided about how much of the conversation he wanted to have right then, Kokichi nodded to Shuuichi. “You up for coming or no?”

Shuichi filled up his plate, raising an eyebrow at Kokichi. “You’re going to go try to talk a self-destructive teen into seeing a therapist? Yes, I’m sure they’d love for a total stranger to sit in on this emotionally charged conversation.”

“Nah, you should come, Shuichi!” Kaito said, reaching over to wrap an arm around his husband, placing little kisses on his cheek as he said, “You’re, like, the gloomiest guy I know~ Maybe the teenagers will recognize you as their own.”

“I’m literally the oldest among us.”

“You’ll add a layer of chaos that might lead to good things!” Kaito said cheerfully, “Or to ruin! It’s been a while since we’ve been led to ruin, you guys! We could use a little bit of ruin to spice up our day! Spice is the flavor of life! We need more of it!”

“...this is because I turned you down last night–”

“Maybe I just wanna spend time with my husbands, is that too much to ask?”

Shuichi sighed, shrugging. “Fine. Sure, I’ll come.”

Kokichi shrugged a little. “At this point, I’m a stranger too, and you at least have points with them from being a cool guy with a snake you let them pet. And I’m hoping that your perspective will help too… I know I can get a little overly optimistic about things, and especially for people who don’t trust the systems as much, like Arven and Doppio…I dunno. Maybe you’ll be able to make a better case.”

Well…Kokichi could presume that Doppio didn’t trust the system, at least, since he had been working in organized crime. Arven, he had gotten the impression, had not much of a quarrel with government programs…but believed himself independent enough to not need them, and thus thought of himself as something outside them. Having Kaito’s familiarity and Shuuichi’s reason might just be a good balance to actually reach them. 

…and, yes, them. Kokichi didn’t feel the same time limit he and Kaito talked about for Arven, but…he had just been through everything the same as Doppio. Plus with his own issues. If Kokichi had his way, they’d both be able to find help with a professional soon. 

“Thank you, Shuu-chan,” Kokichi smiled, leaning his head on Shuuichi’s shoulder before he started to lead the way. “Alright! Here goes nothing!”

-

Doppio didn’t stir from the soft knock on the door, completely passed out and curled around Arven and his pillow.

Arven snored a little. That was about as much as he reacted.

Outside, Kaito frowned, before knocking again. “Hey, come on, guys, come on… food? Psss-psp-psp-psp, we have foooood. Psp-psp-psp–”

Shuichi gave Kaito a Look. ”Kaito, they’re not cats.”

“Hey, you deal with them for the next week, see if you don’t start acting weird,” Kaito muttered, knocking on the door, before saying, “If you idiots are canoodling in there, you best figure yourself out in the next one second, because I only knocked to respect your privacy, but am using my authority as a temporary guardian to come in anyway!”

The three men stood outside the door for a second… before Kaito said, “Okay, ‘Kichi. Break it down. Time to use those lockpicking skills!”

Kokichi gave Kaito a small smile, but before trying that…he simply tried the door handle. Because, well…the last person to handle the door was Kaito, and if he didn’t have an external key for the door…

Shrugging, Kokichi stepped inside, holding the door for his partners…before he sent an apologetic smile to the sleepily blinking, messy pink head that slightly raised, looking disgruntled and confused. “Heya, Doppio. Sorry to wake you, but we’re delivering dinner.”

“...???” Doppio blinked. 

Arven mumbled something into Doppio’s side, still clinging to him in his sleep. He was drooling a little. He was very much still not awake.

“Good job breaking in, babe!” Kaito said, preferring to ignore that the door had been unlocked. Kaito brought in the tray and Shuichi walked in quietly behind him, looking around curiously… before gasping when a big dog suddenly bounded up. Not just approaching Shuichi, but trying to literally throw himself onto him, tail wagging ferociously. “Gah!”

“Oh. Chief likes you, handsome!” Kaito said cheerfully, putting down the tray, before heading over to the bed, grinning warmly at Doppio, before grabbing the end of Arven’s blanket and pulling. “Arven! Get your dog off my husband!”

“Gru–gggh?” Arven flinched with his whole body as his blanket suddenly disappeared, blinking blearily, before saying confusedly, “Ch-chief? Here boy?”

Chief licked Shuichi’s face a little, before bouncing away, jumping onto the bed and flopping himself onto Arven’s lap, the two teenagers now just sitting up and confused as the three adults made themselves at home. “What’s happening?” Arven asked.

“Food! It’s dinner time!” Kaito said cheerfully, going to collect their plates.

Doppio glared a bit at Kaito, but he was processing slowly enough that the next thing he knew, Chief was bounding into their bed (pushed together, it actually felt big enough for all of them) and he could only pet the dog distractedly as everything else loaded in in his head. “...did you really need the whole…uh…fuckin’...” Doppio rubbed an eye. “Qual è la parola…il gruppo… …ugh…”

“Sorry,” Kokichi apologized again. “We were hoping to chat, too, but you can wake up more and eat first, there’s no rush.”

It dawned on Doppio then that not only was Kaito there (expected), but…Prince Shuuichi and Prince Kokichi there. Eating dinner together, apparently. Seeing…him and Arven…half-awake and in their pajamas and…

Doppio gave all the princes a highly suspicious look. “...we’re already in custody. What more could you fucking want?”

Kaito passed Arven and Doppio their plates, before narrowing his eyes at Doppio, saying sternly, “Careful. Those are my husbands you’re talking to.”

“It’s fine, Kaito. To be fair, this is pretty outrageous,” Shuichi said, starting to eat his own food as he settled into one of the arm chairs available. “If this was happening to us, we’d be threatening to kill people already.”

“Noooo… we’d be threatening that Maki would want to kill someone.” Kaito huffed, settling down with his own plate. “Totally different.”

“They’re up to something,” Arven muttered to Doppio, chewing on some of the fruit on his plate, “They’ve surrounded us, have you noticed?”

“The chairs in this room are sort of set up weird, it’s kinda spaced us out.” Kaito pouted.

“They’re up to something,” Arven conspired.

Doppio just gave Kaito a sort of incredulous, confused look, before accepting his plate with thanks. He didn’t really feel like he could eat, but considering how his appetite had been lately and, uh…considering he’d “worked out” more than he, like, ever normally did? It was only a matter of time. 

…he did appreciate that the plate was fully vegetarian too. He remembered…

“In a sense,” Kokichi shrugged, smiling apologetically. “What I wanna bring up isn’t all that pleasant, so it kind of feels like there’s…more aplomb to the build up. But we’re really not trying to corner you.”

Doppio looked at him dully. “...so you come into our room while we’re sleeping and bring food?” He sighed. “Just…what is it? I’ve already had a “talk” from one of you today, let’s just do everything else…”

…he really did look exhausted… Maybe Kokichi shouldn’t bring it up…

“...well…I wanted to apologize to you two, first of all,” Kokichi said softly. “It shouldn’t have just been left in your hands to ask for help getting back to your room--as people who were nearby, and are looking after you? I should’ve checked in on you two after Maki-chan came back. While there were better choices you could’ve made, the onus of your health worsening is on my shoulders, for not seeing how you were holding up. And…I’m sorry, for that. You’re not alone in your problems, and it shouldn’t be left to you to always ask for help before getting it. That’s something I need to be more conscious of.”

…huh?

Doppio gave the heir apparent a bewildered look, and, honestly… “‘Maina?” he softly muttered. “...’m I still asleep or something? This is a really boring dream to get.”

“Awwww, is getting checked up on by your favorite guy a dream for you, kid!?” Kaito grinned, something a little teasing in the gesture.

“You’re not his favorite guy,” Arven said, looking around to see if Amaina would show up. Nudging Doppio, he nodded towards Kokichi, where Amaina was cheerfully soaking in what looked like might be some sort of tea or coffee. 

“Oh yeah? Name one guy you guys like more than me! Name one!”

“I mean, I like Aceto more than you, and I’m pretty sure he likes me more than you too.”

“Okay, that was too easy a challenge, name… three! Guys you like more than me!”

“Lake, Professor Jacq–”

“Name TEN–”

“Kaito,” Shuichi hushed, before looking to the boys. “Kokichi speaks for both of us. We should have checked on you after you left. We don’t want either of you to be put in a position where you’re left in pain because no one feels comfortable annoying you. That’s partly what this next conversation stems from as well. We’ve reason to believe you may be… struggling,” Shuichi said, glancing at Kaito, who suddenly looked extremely uncomfortable, staring at his food, “with things. Generally.”

Doppio gave Kaito an unamused look, eyes flicking to Amaina at Arven’s nod (Kokichi looked a little surprised at that, since he truly doubted either of the boys were indicating that he was their favorite guy) before nodding himself and pointing to Arven as his favorite guy. …and, well, while his list might not be as…easy to say off the top of his head like Arven’s was…

He huffed a little but looked away as Shuuichi seconded the apology, just kind of shrugging…before he looked up with a dry expression. Oh…they thought they were struggling, huh? Really?

Kokichi really hadn’t thought sarcasm could be an emotion, but with everything Doppio was feeling…wow. He hadn’t thought Kaito was lying, but the kid really had some sass. And while he did feel the impetus to laugh a little…it wasn’t really a laughing conversation. Taking a breath…Kokichi took the plunge. 

“...we do have some concerns for each of you, but, in my eyes, there is one that seems…pressing.” Kokichi gave Doppio a concerned look as he paused. “...Doppio? Would you feel alright talking about your fall?”

…of everything the prince could’ve asked about, Doppio hadn’t really been expecting that, and his plain surprise showed on his face. Before his brows furrowed a little, and he gave the prince an uncomfortable look. “...I mean, sure, but… I don’t actually remember falling. I dunno if Kaito told you, but I blacked out before it.”

“He did,” Kokichi said softly. “...but he also told me that it looked like you fell on purpose.”

Arven frowned.

… yeah. He had seen that too.

But, Doppio didn’t remember it. So… “I don’t really know what there is to talk about with that,” Arven said, “Like he said, he blacked out. Even if he threw himself in a blacked out state, that’s still basically an accident.”

“Right, right,” Kaito said, scratching at his chin, closing his eyes…

He just had to confess it. He didn’t like that Doppio couldn’t seem to tell him anything in confidence, but, Kaito couldn’t just ignore it.

“Sure, the blackout itself could have made it just a mistake,” Kaito said, “But, Doppio, you’re struggling with more than just one incident. You, uh… you were struggling with a lot of self doubt there, back when we talked about it at the hotel…”

Arven glanced at Doppio. A silent question in his face.

Doppio still wasn’t sure why everyone seemed so sure about that. The way they talked, he could guess he hadn’t just stood up on the branch and announced to everyone he was going to perform some complex competition dive, but…it was high up! How could they be sure he just hadn’t slipped while he was…whatever it looked like while he was blacked out?

…but that wasn’t the only thing, that, uh…

Doppio went still. Just staring at the bedspread before his eyes locked onto Kaito. Sharp, accusatory…frightened. “...you promised.” 

Not about what they’d talked about at the hotel, about him missing Boss and feeling…all the things he had been feeling, but…what they’d discussed later. What Doppio had only confided after ensuring that Kaito would never tell Arven. Maybe he hadn’t said the words verbatim, but…he’d promised.

“Doppio,” Kokichi tried softly, “You’ve been through a lot, lately. And before that too. And, well, you too, Arven. Coping with everything shouldn’t be something you have to struggle through alone. So…we wanted to ask you guys about considering seeing a therap--

“I’m not crazy,” Doppio snapped, still glaring at Kaito. “And the only reason I’m not fine is because of things you keep doing. I don’t need some PhD in a chair asking how I feel a million times.”

Kaito blinked at the fear in Doppio’s gaze, before realizing, “Oh, wait, I think I meant hot tub…”

But it was kind of too late to correct it, and honestly, he wasn’t sure if the reaction would be any different. He felt something wilt and curdle in himself at Doppio’s obvious betrayal, letting his eyes dip down in shame at Doppio’s glare. 

He wasn’t being a Nao in Doppio’s life. But fuck, sometimes he still worried that, at Kokichi’s worst interpretation of the guy, he was maybe being an Aiichi…

“No one is accusing you of being crazy,” Shuichi said, eating more of his food, sounding calm as he added in, “But we are accusing you of having suicidal ideation. And like with anything that’s going to risk hurting you, we’re recommending you accept some help for it.”

Arven frowned, straightening his shoulders as he said, “You make it sound easy. You have no idea how hard it is to be cornered and put on the spot like this.”

Shuichi hummed, eating a bit more. “I think this first part was always going to hurt. Sometimes we just need to be patient,” Shuichi said, glancing at Kaito and Kokichi, “While we get through the hard part of processing.”

Shuuichi did end up saying something that pulled Doppio’s gaze away from Kaito, but it wasn’t into any sort of relief. It felt…it felt like a pillar of ice down the center of his body seized, hearing that word, and he couldn’t help looking over to Arven, bracing himself. 

…but like everything, Arven wasn’t…whatever Doppio thought the worst case would be. Maybe it was just because he felt defensive, or he just…hadn’t processed it yet, but… Oh. He hadn’t wanted Arven to look betrayed. 

Doppio gave the adults a tense look. “...I’m not going to do anything. I don’t want to die.”

“Good,” Kokichi said softly, catching Shuuichi’s glance with a sigh. “And I know enough that cornering you two doesn’t feel great. But without getting into it? We’ve done a lot of personal work when it comes to mental health, in the last year, and as people who’ve gone through it? It really makes a world of difference, having a professional help you sort out your thoughts. It’s help you two deserve to have offered to you.”

Doppio stared at Amaina, still in her teacup hot tub. “...I don’t need to talk to anyone.”

“Okay, okay, but have you considered…” Kaito grinned, “It’s a lot of fun to talk to someone!”

Shuichi sighed, “Kaito…”

“No, no, I mean this, I feel like when all three of us were talking each other into seeing therapists, we did not stress, like, how… good it feels,” Kaito said, looking between himself and his husbands. “It’s nice, having someone who you can confide in who, heh, unlike me, can’t tell anyone what you said, because they’re meant to be the help that, frankly, I keep reaching out to because it’d be… irresponsible for me to sit on the things I’m seeing with you guys without getting you any help.”

“And, even more than spending time with my family, you know what I’ve wanted all week?” Kaito grinned weakly, “I’ve been craving talking to any of my therapists. Because this has been… stressful. And talking to them gives me a safe place to vent those emotions and stress and have someone be there to support me in a way where that’s all they want to do. That’s the whole point of the sessions. And that can be really nice, Doppio. It can be nice just to confide in someone who’s really, genuinely private and safe.”

Kokichi gave Kaito a loving look. It had felt like eons since their last big session together, and Kokichi knew it had been too long, compared to everything going on, since Kaito’s last personal session. It had been important to get the boys into a safe situation, yes, but…well, looking back, Kokichi wondered if there hadn’t been more time for them to…decompress about the situation. Kaito in particular. 

Hopefully they’d all be able to soon.

Nodding in agreement, Kokichi grinned sheepishly. “It is nice, getting to just…word vomit at someone, and sort through it without burden or judgement. I’m blessed, that I have wonderful husbands who I can just ramble to too,” he giggled, giving Kaito and Shuuichi fond looks, “But for the truly incomprehensible stuff? Or for getting a…testing ground, to find out how I really want to articulate myself when I tell them later. It’s wonderful, having a space to do that.”

“...plus, my therapist is an excellent baker,” Kokichi nodded happily. 

Doppio chewed on his lip. …it did suck, finding out over and over that Kaito apparently wasn’t going to keep things in confidence…and, really, that was his fault, for even considering it again after the first time. 

…but there had been multiple times. Doppio…breaking down and being dumb and…telling Kaito things he’d never tell anyone. And…it had felt good to. 

He was suddenly reminded of collapsing on the floor of that room before, curling into Arven as they both cried in fear. Having someone to listen and rely on, but…the situation had been so much bigger than what they could handle and…their solution had been to run away. Which had just put them in danger anyway…

…and he kept…just dumping things on Arven…

Doppio glanced to his boyfriend nervously. “...ma non posso parlare delle stronzate magiche.” He grimaced lightly. “È un problema Maki?” (...but I can’t talk about magic bullshit. Is this a Maki problem?)

Kokichi figured that if Doppio was speaking Tsumarian, he was asking something that he didn’t want them to know…but he did know enough to catch…”talking”...but more importantly, “Maki problem”. …what did that mean?

Arven frowned at Doppio, before asking, “Intendi parlare di cose magiche a un terapista?” (Do you mean talking about magic stuff to a therapist?) Arven pet Chief’s head absentmindedly, before saying, “Forse conosce un terapista che sa di cose come questa? O potrebbe trovarne uno? Sarebbe bello avere qualcuno con cui parlarne…” (Maybe she knows a therapist who knows about stuff like this? Or could find one? It might be nice to have someone to talk to about that…)

Doppio nodded, looking tired again before his mouth twisted down. “Non credo che potrei evitare di parlarne, a meno che non sprechi il tempo di un terapista solo a sparare cazzate. Non so come potrei evitare di dirlo, ‘Oh, in realtà ho due anni e non sono una persona reale, questo sicuramente non influisce sul mio stato mentale, hahaha!” (I don’t think I could avoid talking about it, unless I just wanna waste some therapist’s time shooting the shit. Dunno how I could avoid saying, ‘Oh, I’m actually 2 and not a real person, that surely doesn’t affect my mental state, hahaha!’)

Doppio huffed, wiping his face and realizing, at that moment, that his lips were trembling a little. And, uh…that his hand was trembling too. And…that there was a hiccup in his chest and…well, he could at least swallow that down…

“It’s not something you have to decide about right now,” Kokichi said softly, looking at the boys with concern. Making a movement like he was about to get up, before hesitating, not wanting to crowd them when it was difficult to leave bed and make their own space. “We can stop, if you need a second.”

Kaito frowned, leaning forward. Wanting to get up and hug the kid…

But he reserved himself, especially seeing Arven immediately do it first. Wrapping his arms around him, pulling him in and whispering little soothing things in that language of theirs.

Shuichi sighed, putting his plate aside, before standing up. “Breaks are important. Isn’t that what our relationship therapist is always saying? Let’s go take five minutes. If Doppio doesn’t need a break, then I do.”

Kaito looked over to Shuichi, surprised at that. Was Shuichi stressed? Putting his plate aside too, he said, “Okay. Give us a bit, guys, we’re just gonna give everyone a chance to breathe,” before following Shuichi to the door.

“But we’ll be nearby if you need anything,” Kokichi gently reassured…or, well, he hoped it was reassurance. But he quickly followed his husbands out too.

Doppio wasn’t crying, but that was more a matter of will, than it not being an issue at all. Instead, he just wrapped his arms around Arven in turn and hid his face, eyes scrunched tight as little tremors went through his body. And when he heard the door shut…

“...s-sorry… Dispiacente, sorry… I-I know I’m real, sorry…”

“I know, you’re just stressed… You only just found all this stuff out, it’d be kinda weird if you were, like, one hundred percent normal and fine with it, immediately,” Arven reasoned out, rubbing Doppio’s back. “And especially with them trying to tell you you’re suicidal all of the sudden… You don’t even remember falling out of the tree. This is too much all at once. I don’t understand why they felt like they had to talk to us about this today.”

“But…” Arven rested his head against Doppio’s, “...maybe it would be nice to talk to someone about this? Cause it is kind of a lot? Especially if we could ask Maki to find us a therapist who knows how to navigate, like… unusual stuff like what you’re going through.”

…it wasn’t…totally all of a sudden. But he meant it when he said he wasn’t going to do anything, and he meant it when he’d told Kaito too. It was just…thoughts he had sometimes now. That were kind of scary… But just…thoughts couldn’t actually hurt him. 

But Kaito really hadn’t needed to tell his husbands, and then corner him into a conversation about it.

Doppio sighed, hugging Arven a little closer. “...maybe,” he murmured. “I just…don’t know what to…do with this. All of this. And…maybe if there was a therapist that knew this stuff…it’d help. L-like Nell helping with my medical papers ‘n stuff.”

“...you know?” Doppio huffed softly. “...she has no idea why I get migraines ‘n stuff? If I really don’t have a brain, th-then there should be no reason why my body’s trying to mimic disability symptoms. S’alotta bullshit.”

“See? That sounds exactly like the kind of thing someone who does magic bullshit can do for you. Especially if… if…”

Arven frowned, before suddenly looking around. “Amaina?”

OoO yessss?

Amaina peeked up from Kaito’s coffee cup. Arven motioned her closer, so she flew over, dripping coffee out of her hair. 

“You say you live people’s thoughts, right?” Arven said. When Amaina nodded, he said, “And you said Aceto is like you?” Another nod. “... does Aceto’s mindset… affect him? Physically?”

O.O

OoO our mentality affects  all of us, physically, corporeally, temporarily. No one can escape the stress and degradation of our own horrors and anxiety… this is a universal truth.

O.O

OoO But also YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH especially this beautiful bitch he IS the space in the mind it is a blessing and also a BIGGER BLEEESSSING so dig it and take care of it.

…that was surprisingly poignant, though ‘surprisingly’ wasn’t really that surprising since Amaina was just cryptic, not simple. But…

Softly, Doppio let out a small, stressed laugh. “...oh good,” he said faintly. “Love that my anxiety can manifest physically. Really needed that. …nnnngggg…”

There was a little shaky breath against Arven’s neck. “...st-till feel like that’s a little bullshit… Feel like I’d be nothing but a f-fucking puddle if it was, like…one to one…oh fuck…”

You’re just not as good at is as I am don’t worry you will live your puddle dreams SOMEDAY watch

As Amaina started to melt into a puddle, Arven grabbed a pillow and plopped it over her. “Look, Aceto,” Arven said, wrapping him in a hug again, “Like Amaina said in that first part, before she started to melt like a little weirdo… feeling anxious makes anyone feel physically bad, and honestly?? You have a lot more than the average person to feel anxious about. Like… no joke.” Arven said, brow furrowing, “No joke. You are dealing with a lot.”

“So if your thoughts affect you more than the average person? Maybe seeing someone just to talk to them really would be worth it… or you can just talk to me,” Arven smiled, “You can always do that…”

“....maybe stop confiding in Kaito, that guy can’t keep freaking anything to himself,” Arven said dryly, “If you got a therapist, at least you’d have someone other than him to talk to about things.”

Ugh…he could do without ever being a human puddle. Or…being any sort of shape that humans weren’t normally. Or…throwing up stuff that humans didn’t…

Sighing, Doppio rubbed his face a bit, before hugging Arven back. “...I really should stop, huh. I don’t even know why I tell him anything in the first place… Just before I know it I’m talking and I’m telling him just…nonsense and…”

Another sigh. “...I could probably…use a therapist.”

Tilting his head, Doppio just looked at Arven for a moment before kissing his cheek. Dropping his head again to press against his neck. Breathing in that comforting earthy, sage scent… “...I like talking to you. And it…feels good to. I just… You have your own stuff going on too, and… Maybe they did have a point, of having another person to talk to that’s just there to listen…”

“...I feel like I’m just…overloading you with stuff, sometimes,” he quietly admitted, rubbing small circles into Arven’s lower back. “I’d like it to be…less. But not ‘cause I’m trying to keep anything from you. If that makes sense? I like you a lot… I don’t just…wanna be a big stress dump, that happens to come with kissing and good food.”

Arven shrugged. “Honestly, the thing I have going on is you. I know Kaito wants to talk like I have a bunch of schoolwork to do, but I’m not worried about that so much, not when I’d rather focus on you.”

“And you do come with really good food,” Arven said, leaning close, grinning, “And the kissing a big highlight.”

Arven gave Doppio a small kiss. Then another… before resting his forehead against Doppio. “And it just feels like all you come with is trouble because the last few days have been relentlessly hectic. Troubles like this aren’t a forever thing. We’ve been having a rough go of it. But it’ll get better soon.”

“Fuck, I hope,” Doppio sighed, feeling comforted, even with Arven’s bangs very nearly getting in his eyes. “I just…want to hang out with you. And cook together… And go out adventuring and foraging…”

Gently, idly, Doppio rubbed his thumbs up and down Arven’s hips. “...before everything? I got so embarrassed… I wanted to carve out time in my day out of work to hang out with you. We’d already spent a lot of time together, but… I was thinking of all the ways I could plan my routes so I could walk you home when school got out… A-and I wanted to ask you, sometime, i-if you wanted to find a cafe that served honey-brick toast, ‘cause I’ve always wanted to try it like that, and this was before you told me you liked it… I wanted to go through the community garden and find all the produce plants in it, and…maybe come up with a game, trying to plan recipes based on what’s there…”

“...I never wanted this…but I always wanted to spend time with you. So, I guess…” Doppio flushed, averting his eyes as he really heard just how…cheesy that all was. Fingers nervously drumming on Arven’s sides. “...I guess I’m looking forward to ‘better’.”

Arven’s expression was at first warm and soft… before it got hotter. A wobbly grin on his face, his little canines poking out at the end, as he made a soft, deep in his throat whining sound… before leaning against Doppio, pulling him into a hug. Happy and light, as he said, “I can’t wait to do all that stuff with you.”

“Oh, we should do the honey-brick toast thing tomorrow!” Arven said excitedly, grinning cheerily at Doppio. “I know a great cafe that serves them, and they do these really thick chai teas, like, you have to take the top layer off the tea before you drink it, the taste is so strong. And we can convince those weirdos outside to pay for it, they owe us a tea and pastry at least, and that means after we can have plenty of coin to spend on some fresh ingredients, or something nice…”

“I think all of that sounds amazing, Aceto,” Arven said, leaning in to kiss him, “And I don’t see why we have to wait for it. I have you here, now… I’m happy just to be with you.”

Arven kissed him again… before confessing with a laugh, “Also, you’re tickling my sides.”

Physically, Doppio had been warm the entire time. Honestly, edging a little into ‘too warm’, though that was a temperature he didn’t actually mind that much. But hearing Arven just…genuinely happy? And feeling a hug that wasn’t meant to comfort, but was simply the bursting expression of joy that needed to be expressed in an action…

Doppio couldn’t help the light, happy giggle that escaped him, hugging Arven back. His mouth watering as Arven described the cafe, feeling…happy, and excited to have plans and just…spending it all with Arven. 

“O-oh!” he squeaked, though it too dissolved into a sheepish laugh. “Sorry, didn’t mean to. But…yeah. That sounds wonderful.”

His gaze slid skeptically towards the door. “...if our warden doesn’t insist on bed rest tomorrow too. I wouldn’t put it past Prince Kokichi to somehow know if we tried to sneak out again…” Doppio suddenly pouted, giving Arven a firm look. “Plus, I’m not gonna make any plans with you climbing while you have a broken toe.”

“If not tomorrow, the next day. If not the next day, the day after that. If it takes three days…” Arven suddenly looked grave, “We riot.”

OoO RIOOOOOT!!!

As Amaina started to ‘destroy’ items in the room, shouting as she did, Arven let the serious look drop with a small laugh, taking Doppio’s hand. “Either way, it’s something to look forward to.”

“...” Arven glanced at the door. “It’s definitely been longer than five minutes, right?”

-

“Okay, but, like, seriously.” Kaito frowned, looking stressed. “Are we sure I haven’t gone full Aiichi? Cause, like… not gonna lie. It’s wearing me down, pissing Doppio off in some fun, new way, every fucking day… Like, I know, I know, it’s more important he’s safe than that he likes me. But fuck… I feel like everything I do is a mistake, when it comes to this kid.”

Kokichi looked towards the door with a calmer expression before he sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. “You certainly aren’t ignoring him, or not listening to what he’s saying so…no. You aren’t being like my dad, Kai-chan. And…and maybe we aren’t doing the perfect things, but…”

Gently, Kokichi took one of Kaito’s hands. “...we are helping. Doppio and Arven are alive, and they’re not missing in the countryside, and Doppio’s boss is gonna get confronted legally, and…they’re being looked after, now. Personally and institutionally. And I think that really matters. For their safety, but…for their happiness too. Even if…it kinda sucks right now.”

Kissing Kaito’s wrist, Kokichi sighed. “...my good husband. Taking on giant problems himself… There’s a reason dozens of people are usually involved with stuff like this, and that’s not even accounting for all the unique problems the boys have. If you feel worn down…it’s cause it’s something that one person shouldn’t be doing on their own.”

Looking to Shuuichi, Kokichi gently traced his fingertips down Shuuichi’s arm. “Yeah?”

Shuichi smiled, nodding. Seeing Kaito starting to stress out as Doppio started to look like he’d cry had been the main reason Shuichi had wanted this break, and he was grateful that Kokichi was bringing down Kaito’s anxiety. Sometimes Shuichi envied the effect on Kaito’s mood and stability Kokichi had. Shuichi knew he could do the same, but it’d take him longer, and sometimes Shuichi felt like he’d make it worse before it got better.

But Kaito seemed to already be calming down, just nodding as Kokichi talked, before entwining his hand with Kokichi’s after the kiss to his wrist, taking a deep breath. “Right. Right. And we’ve done some of the hardest parts already. If we can convince Doppio to look for a therapist next? I really feel like we’ll have all our bases covered. They’re safe, Doppio’s getting some much needed therapy, Arven has someone taking accountability for him, keeping an eye on his work and his injuries, god, he could have lost that toe if he had left it for another month…”

Kaito took another breath, nodding. “We’re doing the best we can. It’s helping.”

“It’s helping,” Kokichi affirmed. Right now, it was just connecting the boys to the help they needed. Out of the fire, but handing over burn cream and bandages. There was still a lot of work to be done, but…well, most of it was up to Doppio and Arven themselves now. Or CPS. 

…Kokichi had a feeling that they were about to have a Round 2, talking quite a bit with the adoption agencies…

Kissing Kaito’s wrist again, Kokichi smirked a little. “...how much you wanna bet they’re kissing, now that we’ve left them alone for…more than five minutes? Aw, Kai-chan, you should’ve seen, it was so sweet earlier. They were holding hands and sayin’ sweet stuff to each other.”

“Ugh, absolutely,” Kaito said, rolling his eyes, though there was a small grin on his face. “Those two idiots. They're all over each other, constantly, and have the audacity to look at me and Lake like we’re talking out of our asses when we start pushing them with sex talk. They really couldn’t be more brazen about how into each other they are, I feel like I gotta be a constant source of cock-block there just to at least make them think twice before doing anything they’re not ready for.”

“I’m a little shocked to hear you say all of that, Kaito.” Shuichi frowned. “If there was anyone I would have thought would be fine with it…”

“No,” Kaito said dryly, looking exhausted, “They have too much going on already. And sex is fun, and comforting, and brings you closer to your loved ones, and that’s great… But it’s also scary? And it’s tough learning how to do it without hurting someone else in the process, or picking up some bad habits, because sexual emotions are, just, unique in a way that I don’t think a person notices until they’re in it. They’re already handling crazy abuse stuff, and being literally pulled from both of their homes, and all of this frightening stuff. Now is not a good time trying to figure out how to have a sexual relationship. It’s just not. They can do that when things are calmer and they’re happier and in a more stable place, not now, it wouldn’t be good for them. I’m determined to discourage it.”

“...but it’s cute, watching them be so in love,” Kaito said, looking to Kokichi fondly, “It’s exciting, being in love for the first time. It’s sweet.”

Kokichi snickered softly. He definitely had an adult perspective of it, but…well, his teens hadn’t been that long ago. It could very well just be his own experience, but his own sexual experience, as non-practice as it was, had seemed so secluded. Like, of course it made sense for him to find people attractive and awkwardly flirt, but anyone noticing that? Had to be out of their minds. The adults in his life trying to educate him? Fools that knew nothing of sex themselves. 

Really, Kokichi just hoped that, even if they initially dismissed it, any bit of sexual education passed on to the boys would at least stick in the back of their minds. Because…

…well. Yeah. Sex was complicated. They couldn’t ensure the boys wouldn’t mess around, but…they could do their best to pass on lessons. 

…and be an extreme cock-block, in Kaito’s case. 

“It’s been clear the whole time, but…they really care about each other,” Kokichi smiled. “It’s very wholesome to see in action. …alright, we ready to go back in? If nothing else, we should collect the dishes…”

“Yeah, let’s do it. But back up a little, beautiful, handsome, I have to do it a specific way,” Kaito explained, heading over to the door and–

“If you kick the door in, they might not be making out. They might be crying,” Shuichi reminded him.

Kaito hesitated… cursed. Before gently opening the door, knocking as he called in, “Hey, we good to come back in, guys?”

They were not crying. They were absolutely making out. Kaito wished he had followed through on his ‘kick down the door’ entrance, but, ah well. 

As they walked back in, Shuichi said, “I feel like it’s worth mentioning, but you don’t have to decide to do this today. You can think on the therapist issue. We’ll still ask about it periodically, because it’d be unwise to just let the subject quietly fade, but that still doesn’t make this conversation an all or nothing moment.”

A bit red-faced still from, erm, being interrupted, Doppio was finally digging into his dinner, that slow, ravenous feeling back in full form. Though, he gave Shuuichi a much calmer nod in the time he took to swallow and clear his mouth. “I, uh, do appreciate that. But…I…think you might be right. On some stuff. But…”

A few nerves flaring up again, Doppio averted his gaze to the wall. “I’d…like to ask Maki for, um. Recommendations. About therapy stuff.”

Kokichi blinked in surprise, but didn’t let it linger. “I can’t answer for her of course, but…sure? I think we’d all be happy to give our recs and tips for finding therapists, yeah?” He nodded to his husbands. 

…that…must’ve been a hell of a conversation she had with them. 

Hm. Kind of…the same feelings when he talked about Dr. Pacuvius too…

“Uuuuh, sure.” Kaito agreed, just as confused by this– Shuichi, as usual, looked unsurprised, and that was likely because Maki had already told Shuichi something she hadn’t mentioned to the rest of them yet– but nodding. “It’ll be good! And when you’re ready, we’ll help you set up appointments and do your interviews and such. It’ll be good! It’s not something you’ll regret!”

Kaito was absolutely both asking Dr. Mariah to vet any choice Doppio made and also for funsies he was asking Kokichi just to take a peek in their brain, no one was fucking around with Doppio when it came to therapy, no fucking tricks or games.

…but it’d be fine! It was gonna be good. Kaito had meant all that, about therapy being, in its own way, a good feeling, fun thing to do. Fun in the way sports was fun. Like… ow. But yay! But ow.

“Alright. I guess, with that, we can let you guys get back to resting… which is all you should do tonight. Don’t make me regret the bed pushing, I can still get bunk beds in here so fast,” Kaito threatened, “But, do you guys want to ask anything of us, while you have us here?”

“Can you take us to a cafe tomorrow?” Arven asked, “Or, well, drop us off, fuck off for a while, then pick us up?”

“...no,” Kaito said dryly, “You’re injured, give yourself at least a day or two, seriously. Once your foot’s not actively inflamed? Sure.”

…geez, he hoped so. If, after all this, therapy turned out to be bullshit? Doppio reserved the full right to at least one more crying fit. 

Doppio rolled his eyes a bit at Kaito’s weird nagging, and pouted a bit at the predictable answer of Kaito vetoing the cafe trip tomorrow, though he haughtily huffed at it. …even if he sort of agreed with Kaito cautioning that Arven should properly rest his foot. “Third day we’re rioting, if we still can’t leave. So you know.”

Kokichi giggled softly, giving the boys an amused look. “We’ll mark it on the calendar. But don’t worry, we’ll make sure you can get your date before you go too stir crazy.”

Doppio blinked, looking a little startled. …a date?

“Yeah, preferably on healthy legs and not asthma risking lungs.” Kaito huffed, heading over to pick up Shuichi’s plate, then Kokichi’s. “Make sure you send your plates back to the kitchen, don’t just let them stack up. ‘Kichi, come here, stop trying to encourage rebellion,” Kaito insisted, after piling his dishes in one hand, suddenly wrapping his arm around Kokichi’s waist, picking him up. “There will be no riots, we don’t give into teenage threats.”

Doppio watched, baffled, as Kaito just…picked up the heir apparent like a rowdy cat, the concept of “date” still bouncing around his head and not helping his confusion at all. 

For his own part, Kokichi just seemed to sigh and grin cheekily up at his husband. “I listen to the demands of my people, Kai-chan, you can’t stop me. A solution that benefits everyone is what I work for.”

“Still, try to take it easy and rest up,” Kokichi smiled at the boys. “It’ll be more fun when you’re not injured or sick anyway.”

Shuichi opened the door for Kaito, who made a show of bouncing Kokichi up into his arms as he huffed, taking the heir-apparent out. Shuichi gave the boys a small nod, before closing the door behind him.

Arven watched them go, before peeking over at Doppio. “... not to get a one track mind, but…” He grinned. “Wanna pick up where we left off?”

…weird. 

Doppio watched the door for another few moments before matching Arven’s grin. “Absolutely.”

…though he gave his boyfriend something of a shy look. “...um, though… The cafe thing… Would? That be a date?”

Arven leaned in, before stalling, seeing Doppio’s confusion. “Oh, uh… yes? I’d think so… it doesn’t have to be though. Could just be us hanging out. If that’s better?”

Doppio frowned softly, though unlike many of his expressions that evening, there was no hint of distress in it. “...I dunno. I don’t…dislike the idea of going on a date with you, and, well…you are my, um, boyfriend and…dates go along with that.”

“...could we hang out this time, then…maybe go on a date next time?”

Arven, honestly, wasn’t sure what the difference was… but he nodded. Not all that worried about it either, as he said, “Sure. I don’t mind. Either way I get to spend time with you, which is all I really want out of it anyway.”

“And when you are ready to date?” Arven said, “We’ll, uh… I don’t know. Make an event of it? Or at least do something extra nice. It’ll be fun.”

Doppio nodded slowly, before smiling and leaning forward to peck Arven’s lips. “That’s…kinda. I mean…it feels to me? Like making it an event is kinda…what makes it a date. And I…well, I guess it doesn’t have to be, and I like hanging out with you no matter what, but…” He sighed, a little exasperated with himself. “...we’ll see how it goes. Figure it out. All that.”

“It’ll be fun,” he smiled, leaning in for another kiss. “I’m excited to see a cafe you’re vouching for.”

“I’d be more self conscious about it, but it genuinely is a really nice cafe,” Arven slightly bragged, kissing him back with small, warm pecks. “They have this big table, you can play tic-tac-toe on it. You can change it to play other things too, but I always thought it was funny to have a whole fancy table set up just to play giant tic-tac-toe. We could play it together.”

“That sounds much more my speed than that giant chess set I’ve seen in the park,” Doppio laughed, not moving back much from Arven’s kisses. Staying close enough that they could whisper and still hear every word. “...I really liked playing those on-paper games with you, the other day. I will figure out a better strategy for that dot and box game one of these days, promise.”

Closing the space, Doppio lingered on his next kiss, only pulling back slightly with a content smile. “...lotta stuff’s fun with you.”

“You were getting the hang of it at the end there,” Arven said, unwilling to admit most of his wins were purely luck-based. He wasn’t particularly good at those games. He just enjoyed them. It probably wouldn’t take Doppio long to become a real contender.

Arven sighed contently after the last kiss, laying his head down on the pillow, reaching up to touch Doppio’s face. His cheeks were soft. Arven kept running his thumb over the side of Doppio’s face, marveling slightly at the soft feeling. The gentle ply of skin. “Think you’d be interested in a dog park? There’s a nice one nearby. Chief likes to go and barrel over the other dogs.”

That was a kind way to say Doppio had almost won one of their last games. Doppio didn’t think he was completely devoid of competitive spirit, but, well, he wasn’t really put out by losing so much. While he had known what some of the games were, like tic-tac-toe, he’d…never really played them before. And just getting the chance to, along with playing them with Arven, specifically, had made it an enjoyable time, even with his losing streak. 

Which was a good thing in the long-run, since anything involving strategy Doppio would probably lose.

Doppio followed Arven down a bit, lounging more on his arm than properly sitting up as Arven laid down. His gaze softening as Arven cupped his cheek, caressing it. Though, it immediately lit up. “Would I?! Arven, you’re asking me if I wanna go look at and play with dogs? Of course!”

Giggling, he pecked Arven again before settling down in bed more. Glancing down and reaching out to pat Chief’s side. “I know your old guy likes his naps, but he seemed pretty happy getting to run around while we were traveling. That’s another reason to get over this dumb bed rest thing quickly.”

Chief panted, flopping over and rolling around Arven’s lap a bit in order to stretch out towards Doppio’s pets more. Yesss… pets.

Arven chuckled, letting himself relax, just enjoying looking at Doppio. “He’s an old dog, but even old dogs still like to play. When we were younger? Chief was insatiable. I remember I was foraging in the woods at one point, and I still don’t entirely know how he managed it? But I looked up into a tree, and there Chief was! Just, hanging out in the branches, like he was some sort of monkey! Dogs aren’t like cats, they don’t climb trees, but despite that, there Chief was! Up the tree.”

Doppio snorted, and…well, while he had a boyfriend right there, he also had a very cuddly and adorable dog in his lap, so Doppio indulged Chief, scratching and petting his flank, occasionally running his fingers through the thicker fur (not that the fur at his sides was thin by any metric) on his back, and giving extra scritches by his tail. “I didn’t think dogs could even climb trees.”

“Wooooow,” Doppio praised, entirely content in Dog Pat Town, “So talented, Chief. A pro tree climber in his youth~”

“He really is. I had no idea what to do, but thankfully, Chief just jumped down after a while,” Arven said, patting Chief’s belly, Chief just in dog patting heaven. Yesssss allllll the pets. 

“...you know,” Arven said, patting Chief a bit, “This might be too soon, but… now that you’re not spending all of your time working? Are there things you’d want to do, actively? Outside of being a vegetarian? Like… would you ever want a dog?”

Doppio blinked slowly, still petting Chief. “...I don’t know… Every time the thought of a pet came up, I never thought too deeply ‘cause…I was busy all the time, and moved a lot, and I didn’t feel like I could be very good for an animal…” He frowned a bit. “...still kinda don’t since…I don’t really know where I’ll be living, and…I feel like I’d forget constantly about feeding times or brushing schedules or vet visits or…all the constant stuff for taking care of a pet.”

…though he had been on top of all those constant daily needs for a human. 

“...I dunno,” he said again, voice softening. “...it still doesn’t…kinda feel real. It sorta feels that when the government’s done with me, I’d just…go back to planning meals ‘n cleaning, ‘n…all that stuff. I have no idea what I’d want to do with my time otherwise.”

He snorted, pressing his shoulder to Arven’s. “Other than hanging with you, of course.”

“I mean, I guess if you really wanted to, you could go back to being an assistant somewhere?” Arven said, glancing up at the ceiling as he got lost in thought. “Or a housekeeper. They make good money… But I’ll be honest? And this isn’t me saying what you should or shouldn’t do, but…”

Arven shrugged, looking back to Doppio. “It’d be little… sad. If you never let yourself explore things outside of what you were…” Arven’s face scrunched a little, displeased by this thought, “Made?? To do?? Is that… is that what happened? You were made?”

…he guessed so… While being Boss’s assistant had always filled Doppio with pride, the thought of…going out to find the same kind of job for someone else? It was just sort of…an empty feeling. He supposed he would be happy with the work, but…

Doppio’s face scrunched too, as he stared at the ceiling. Hands slowing on Chief, as he started to anxiously scratch his arm instead. “...I guess? How else would I…” A grimace. “Be? I guess it’s no less plausible that I just…popped into existence one day…”

“...was I made to cook and clean?” Doppio muttered to himself, squinting at the ceiling. “I did have to learn everything… I was an awful cook at the start…”

“Maybe that’s because he’s an awful cook?” Arven mused, not entirely in a thought experiment. “I mean, it’s not like, if he made you, he could just manifest skills in you he didn’t have. You probably had to learn that skill on your own out of necessity.”

…

Doppio stared wide-eyed at the ceiling. His nails digging deep into his arm. 

…Boss was a pretty…er…unpracticed cook. That was what Doppio was there for! 

…it was what he was there for. Had…Boss…

“...is he actually my dad???” Doppio breathlessly choked out. They didn’t…really look alike, other than the hair color. And…if Boss really wanted…h-he… He’d just make himself, would he? Boss had said that before, wishing for himself… Why would he make Doppio? Why would he make such a…disappointment? Why…was Doppio alive?

Arven frowned, rolling onto his side again and shifting up onto his elbow. Appraising Doppio’s distress.

“...would that be so bad?” Arven asked, “Everyone’s got a parent. And… it’d explain a lot, wouldn’t it? Why he had so much control over your life.”

“...it’s everything I wanted so badly, b-but I thought I was awful for even considering it,” Doppio admitted, voice strained. Nails digging deeper. “He was my boss! I thought there was something…gross, a-and wrong with me for even tempting a daydream…”

“But it’s bad because I got CPS called on him. They’re gonna…!” Doppio’s eyes widened as a realization came to him, sharply gasping as he suddenly sat up in bed. “Wait! If he’s my dad then he didn’t kidnap me!”

Arven frowned, sitting up and giving Doppio a slightly nervous look. “...sure. If he’s your dad he didn’t kidnap you. But… he still did all that other stuff. Also, at the risk of making myself feel very gross, he did all of that stuff to a 2-year-old. Almost 2-year-old. I mean, sure, now you’re 14, but… ugh. That’s the wrong point. My point is, they didn’t call CPS because you were kidnapped. They did it because he… drowned you, Aceto.”

“Sure, but-!” Doppio gave Arven a nervous, desperate look. “...but we know I p-probably wouldn’t die, right? A-and the kidnapping charge makes it worse! So…so if there’s anything I could do to…lighten the terms…” He winced a bit. “...I-I know there’s…nothing I could do now to…fix this. But it’s…it’s still something I could try…”

Arven winced, feeling nausea run through him.

The idea that the guy had drowned Doppio, knowing he wouldn’t die?

Why did that feel… worse? Somehow. Careless. Like the man was playing with a toy…

“Why don’t you wait to see if he’ll even try to claim you?” Arven said, “It’s a moot point, if he doesn’t acknowledge you as his son, I think. He never has before, right?”

Doppio paused, his frantic energy coming to a halt as he winced. Eyes shutting as Arven landed right on the sore point. “...no. We were just…boss and subordinate. Professional.”

“...mi ha chiamato ‘mio vito’ a volte…” Doppio murmured softly, something tingeing defeated in his voice. Before his expression fell even more. “...I…didn’t even ask how the investigation went today…” (He called me ‘my life’ sometimes…)

Arven reached over, pulling Doppio into a hug. “...maybe it’s better not to know. For now, anyway. You’re busy enough pulling your own life back together. You’re too busy to be his too.”

Doppio knew Arven didn’t…love hearing it, but… Doppio closed his eyes against Arven’s shoulder. “...I miss him. I hope he’s eating and getting enough sleep. I don’t even know if the people from CPS could even contact him today, ‘cause he hates being around people. I miss him…”

…Boss? I’m sorry…

I know nothing will ever make it up to you, but…I’m sorry.

I miss you.

…I love you.

Sorry.

-

{Sorry.}

Diavolo huffed, hearing the echoes of his lesser half bounce between the walls of his ears, as he glared at the pot of tomatoes. He was making tomato soup. He had so far added water, and all the tomatoes he still had left in the fridge. He had even mushed them together.

It still didn’t look like soup.

What could he possibly be missing?

This sort of work was beneath him. That was why he couldn’t do it. Because he was too perfect for such menial tasks. He really should just get the boy back here. It just needed to be obviously not a murder, and everything would sort itself out. Diavolo would have to keep an eye out for his next opportunity.

…okay, but why could he smell smoke when there was no fire? Were the tomatoes burning? Why wasn’t it soup yet?? Aggravating.

-

Kaito was a strong believer that a truly good amount of sleep could make challenges easier to tackle the next day. And, at least in his own case, he was usually right. Taking his sleeping pills that night, sleeping next to his husbands while his baby snuffled and cooed nearby, Kaito slept well that day, and woke up feeling… better. Not on the verge of calling Miss Crystal for an emergency session. He had this! He had just been having a kinda stressful week taking care of kids that made Kaito think about kind of stressful things! It was nothing he couldn’t handle! He wasn’t feeling better, he was feeling great! Good enough to go on a run, even!

So, that was what he did that morning. Bundled up Miyako, kissed his still sleeping husbands after making a mostly half-hearted attempt to get them to come running with him, before he was off! He saw Maki and Timothy that morning too, and while they gamely ran with him a little that morning, Timothy’s training was actually a little more advanced than Kaito’s these days, and he had eventually waved them off as the two had headed out for tougher terrain.

Heading back into the castle, he was feeling warm and sweaty and was cheerfully babbling to Miyako, who earnestly babbled back, when a housekeeper approached him and…

…

…

Kaito had gotten as far as the yellow room, before the reality of what he was about to do hit him. Maybe if Miyako wasn’t literally strapped to his chest, he might have been tempted to go further. To pick up the phone. To… he didn’t know. He didn’t know.

What he did do, was he picked up the phone, but didn’t turn on the speaker. He just quietly laid the phone down, staring at it. Listening as an impossibly small, impossibly distant voice said quietly in the limits of the phone’s individual speaker, “Kaito.”

Kaito didn’t say anything. It didn’t even sound like him. Not really. The speaker on the phone itself too poor and static. 

“Kaito, I heard you shifting around. Tell me Dicea hasn’t made you so weak that you can’t even gain the courage to speak to me. This is a very poor telling, that maybe even the other bit of madness being reported to me is potentially true, if you’ve truly debased yourself to this level of pathetic–”

Kaito reached over and covered the phone speaker. Little babies shouldn’t hear that about their dads…

Giving it some time, Kaito uncovered the speaker. “--if you don’t publicly announce that this rumor of disownment is baseless, I’m going to have no choice but to make my own disownment public news, before yours spreads. Do you really think you have a right to embarrass me like this? I put so much time and resources into protecting and cultivating you, and at the first sign of political advantage, you disown me? What, do you think Kaede will treat you better for it? You disgusting, cowardly—”

Kaito covered the speaker again. Maybe if he gave it more time…

“-- Tengan was right about you.” Byakuya snarled, “Everyone was–”

“Okay.” Kaito whispered, picking up the phone and then hanging it up. “That’s enough of that.”

Kaito stared at the hung up phone for a bit. Hmmm… yeah. That was enough of that. Kaito didn’t… need to hear any more of that. He didn’t… really owe that guy anything. Listening to him. ‘S not like… they were related or anything…

“...” Kaito grinned down at Miyako. “Okaaaaay~ let’s get baby back to her throne, and then dad’s gonna go ask for some heeeeelp~ Yeah? Isn’t that responsible? We’re gonna go be responsible. Let’s gooooo~”

-

Kokichi was furious. He knew Kaito wouldn’t, and he wouldn’t push his husband to, but it was something like this that made him wish Kaito had filed a restraining order too. It wasn’t enough, all the stress of the last week. No, Byakuya just had to come calling, satiating his own damn ego. No call for their wedding or bonding ceremony, no call before Pudiciam or Atua’s week (Kokichi could make an exception for Kaito’s birthday, since it was still a bit to go), never responding to any of Kaito’s many letters…but no. As soon as Kaito made a stance that he didn’t want to talk to Byakuya anymore, nooo, then Byakuya decided to show up. Selfish prick…

…but Kokichi kept a lot of his anger to himself. Not entirely, he knew that wasn’t helpful, and…he could recognize that expressing his own anger at the situation helped validate some of Kaito’s feelings. But Kaito’s feelings were…kind of the main focus and…

…Kaito hadn’t been doing great for days. They had been hoping just to get to a session naturally, but…

This was a crisis. So Kokichi reached out to Dr. Mariah, and asked for a home visit. Thankfully, it was a lovely day, and the patio facing out towards the East Garden was empty. And the tea Kokichi had requested smelled wonderful.

Those were some upsides to the day.

Maki stretched her arms over her head, leaning her face back into the sun… before saying, “So, I told the boys that if they have any magic problems, to come to me, right? Just so everyone is aware. That way, none of the actual magic peeps have to expose themselves.”

“Because of the Amaina thing?” Kaito asked, looking around, the group still waiting for Dr. Mariah. 

“More or less.” Maki nodded. “So, if they’re asking for me after talking about getting a therapist? Then I think, since she’s here anyway, I’m gonna see if I can’t shove them at her before she leaves today. I imagine they must want to be able to talk about Amaina to someone.”

“That makes sense.” Shucihi sighed, before looking to Kaito. “Are you sure you want all of us here? It’s okay if you want it to be a one on one.”

“No, I…” Kaito shrugged, “I could say it’s just because Dr. Mariah still technically knows more about Byakuya than Miss Crystal does? But that’s not why. I just want you guys… if that’s okay?”

“That makes a lot more sense, about some things,” Kokichi hummed, making some quiet realizations to himself. …Nell the same as Maki, huh? “Not that I think you’d give bad advice about therapists, Maki-chan, but that does give you some particular expertise that they’d seek out.”

Last he’d checked in, the boys were still sleeping, so…hopefully by the end of their session they’d be awake. Kokichi would probably badger them about getting food either way. 

But. That was later, and now was important. 

Leaning back in his patio chair--it was very close to the eggs, a sort of dipped partial sphere with a cushion inside--Kokichi gave Kaito a soft look. “It’s okay. Time or place, if you want me there? Then I’ll be there.”

Kaito gave Kokichi a warm look at that, before nodding, fussing with his cup of tea in his hands. “...ya know. He didn’t even mention it was his birthday today? It’s his birthday today… It probably didn’t even occur to him that’d be a reason to want to talk to me today. Like, that he didn’t even mention it at all? It just wasn’t on his mind… maybe he doesn’t remember.”

“There’s really no reason to speculate,” Dr. Mariah said, walking out of the patio entrance, having heard the tail end of that as she opened the door. “I apologize I wasn’t here faster. I still had to finish up another session when I got word.”

Kaito winced. “Shit, really? That’s my bad.”

“Not at all. You let me worry about how I manage my clients, trust if I say no harm’s been done,” Dr. Mariah said, sitting down, smoothing out her elaborate dress, before looking curiously at the tea. “Ah, wonderful. Thank you, both to whoever organized this and whoever put the tea together…”

Sipping at her tea, Dr. Mariah sighed. Sitting in the quiet for a moment. “...you taste like you’re struggling, Kaito. But visually you seem much more put together than you usually do, once you’ve gotten to this state. Any thoughts on why?”

Kaito laughed dryly. “Why I’m not having a meltdown?” Dr. Mariah nodded. “Uh, I don’t know, honestly… There hasn’t been time? I’d love to say I’m just getting better at coping, but there just not feeling like there’s time to freak out is more honest. Kinda feel like I’ve put my stress on time out… Man, Maki, is this what it feels like?”

Maki shrugged. “Probably. Feel your feelings later, you mean?”

“Yeah! Exactly. That’s what I’m doing.” Kaito nodded. “I’m feeling my feelings later! …sort of thought that mindset would mean I wouldn’t have to feel them at all now, but I don’t think that’s how it works.”

Maki nodded. “Mmmhm. Maybe it’s easier to say ‘think about your feelings later’. Especially when there’s more important things going on.”

“Yeah, that’s tough. That’s not the full-blown repression thing I used to get by on, acknowledging your feelings and then putting them aside is way tougher. Ouch.” Kaito winced. “Did you ever get around to feeling all of those feelings, Maki-roll?”

“Not really,” Maki said, “They’d just get replaced with new feelings that I’d also need to put aside for later. Repeat indefinitely.”

Kokichi didn’t think Byakuya’s birthday was worth celebrating, but…that really was just the cherry on top, huh? Bastard. 

“Hello, Dr. Mariah,” Kokichi greeted, taking the thanks with a small, pleased nod, before giving her a sheepish smile. Really, he was grateful she had time at all today, and especially to do a home call. Considering the spontaneous nature of crisis sessions, they had gotten lucky the last few times that she wasn’t in the middle of a session already. Kokichi didn’t think that was so much a scheduling error on her end, and really…a good look, that she had managed her time well enough that she did have time for emergency sessions so sporadically. 

All that to say, Kokichi didn’t think any of them were all that miffed waiting on the patio for a bit. 

“That seems…pretty rough,” Kokichi winced a little, before sighing. “Though I do agree with the practicality of the method, if this week’s shown me anything… But! This is a space to feel those feelings, hopefully. And, uh…” He gave Kaito a mildly apologetic look. “...hopefully it hasn’t been too far, carrying those feelings over. Even before this morning…I feel like we should’ve tried harder to get some sort of session going. I’m sorry, Kai-chan.”

Kaito laughed, shaking his head. “No, I’m okay. I mean, not right now specifically, but generally. Lake actually really helped a few times, she really kept me steady for a few days there.”

“Really?” Shuichi said, tilting his head a bit, “It’s good to hear that relationship is repairing. I’m assuming it is, and you’re not doing that thing you like to do where you confide in literally the worst person around–”

“Noooo,” Kaito sighed, rolling his eyes, “I only did that a little bit this month… maybe talked a little too much about Doppio to just… some guy? Older, hot… wasn’t an asshole though or anything. Just sorta around. He made me realize I needed to help Doppio even if it made Doppio upset with me.”

Maki groaned into her hands. “Kaito… talking to strangers isn’t better…”

“Hmmm,” Dr. Mariah said, sipping at her tea, “Doppio?”

“Oh! Yeah, yeah, that’s been a lot of the stress in my life the last week or so… I say ‘mine’, I’ve kind of made it a group problem. And everyone’s been really, like, patient and helpful with this.”

“‘This’ being…?”

Kaito fussed with his fingers, before taking a breath. “I’ve stumbled across these two, like… I mean, just call it what it is, wildly abused kids. One of them’s dealing with absolute, long term neglect, which is already bad enough, but the other one? Shit, he was living a nightmare situation. Like… like worse than what I dealt with. Shit, maybe the same as what Shuichi and Maki can’t remember…”

Dr. Mariah considered that. “Why compare it? You’ve seemed to have put your and your family’s abuse in a tier list.”

“Have I?” Kaito frowned, “Well, that’s natural, right? I mean… it matters, what Shuichi and Maki went through… sometimes I worry about the fact they never talk about it…”

“We literally don’t remember it,” Shuichi said, shrugging.

“Yeah, but that’s just the warehouses. You guys have gone through things that I can’t imagine…”

“That’s true. And someday I’ll poke at that. In our individual sessions, Kaito, you must remember that Maki and I do talk about things that don’t come up in group therapy. I imagine Shuichi and Dr. Ford do as well. Kokichi and his therapist, for that matter.” Dr. Mariah said, “The reason we tend to focus on yours in the group therapy, is because your trauma tends to be specifically about group dynamics. Your abuse was designed around how you act in groups, your relationship dynamics. And that abuse has visibly shown itself in how you interact with other people, especially this particular group. So, it’s a relationship therapy issue.”

“Yeah, well… I feel like that’s kinda true for anyone,” Kaito muttered.

“Why compare Doppio to Shuichi and Maki?”

“Because his ‘boss’ tortured him,” Kaito said, brow furrowing, frustration building in his eyes, “Blatant torture. He held him in and out of water for a fucking… hour…”

“I’m happy she’s been there for you,” Kokichi smiled softly, something worried gently dimming in the expression for a moment. “Emotionally and physically. Of course I’m overjoyed with you spending good time with my family but…I’m grateful for you getting support.”

…from someone more than a stranger. Kokichi was glad for the conclusion, but…huh. If some stranger knew about Doppio’s situation too… How would they know his address, though? Or know the specific days Doppio had been taken into custody, or when they arrived back at the castle. Kokichi would hope that Kaito would at least mildly have recognized them if it was someone that worked at the castle…

Hm. 

Kokichi frowned a bit, never quite approving of comparing people’s pain, but…

“...in a certain sense, Doppio’s situation could be workplace abuse,” Kokichi said dully, before his brows furrowed in worry. “But…whatever the classification? Doppio was in a highly dangerous situation perpetrated by someone that…pretty much had all power over him. Getting him, and the other child now under government custody, into a safe situation has been…the past week. For Kai-chan especially.”

“Oh?” Dr. Mariah looked to Kaito, who let out a long breath at that. Looking surprisingly, just, haggard, rather than proud. “It sounds like you’ve gotten invested, Kaito.”

“Yeah, well…” Kaito shrugged tiredly, “I mean, I just kinda stumbled onto both of them. It’s hard not to get involved when they’re right in front of you.”

“Actually, traditionally, it’s fairly easy,” Dr. Mariah said, “But far more likely, is that they were both showing signs that you, very specifically, are the type of person to look for. Because you’re so familiar with those signs.”

“...” Kaito winced. “...I thought I was projecting on Doppio, for a minute there. Like, projecting hard, like how we talked about? Where we try to give people the same things we’ve dealt with, cause we don’t want to be alone or whatever? Like, it was so close that I just felt like maybe I was even putting words in his mouth. Because man… some things he said…”

“May I ask what?” Dr. Mariah asked. There we go. A way to gently lead him back to why he had an emergency session.

But Kaito, as he always did when it came to this particular discussion, hesitated. Mentally going through the tangles and hoops he needed to get past and to be honest about the types of abuse that actually affected him. “...I mean, ya know… like… he talks about his boss the way I talk about, or, talked about Byakuya.”

“Elaborate,” Dr. Mariah encouraged him, “It’s important to understand your feelings. If this week was ‘feel your feelings later’? Now’s the time.”

“Right, well, okay.” Kaito huffed, scratching his scalp. “...it’s frustrating. Because he uses the same excuses and workarounds that I do. He loves his boss, he thinks the guy is perfect, and if he does things that hurt? Or are confusing? Well, that just means you don’t understand what he’s doing. And he’s, like…” Kaito rolled his eyes, scowling, “Really loving back, in his own way. Other people just can’t understand how he expresses love. If they’d just ask instead of assuming and assuming and assuming, if they’d just bother trying to understand, they’d get it. But they don’t try! Because everyone hates him already. So no one’s willing to listen…”

“...yeah.” Kaito sighed, letting his shoulders fall, the exhaustion coming back. “It was frustrating, hearing myself in someone else. And the worst thing is, I still don’t know what to say. Because I can’t tell him what he wants to hear. Because the guy is a monster, and not being honest and blunt and upfront about it just risks putting Doppio back in a dangerous situation.”

Kokichi could understand why Doppio had done it. Maybe Kaito had already started thinking, in the back of his mind, that he might be projecting a little, but it was Doppio who had really started that crisis of faith. He was a frightened teen who wanted to protect someone he loved--Kokichi understood that. But he still wasn’t pleased with anyone playing mind games with Kaito, understandable situation or not. He just wasn’t going to take it out on the kid. 

But, again, that was more of a Doppio problem than a Kaito problem, which was what they were tackling here. The concept of Doppio’s situation was relevant, but…Kokichi had a good clue that the things dragging Kaito down the most (other than the fact of seeing children in danger, though that tended to spark action rather than the exhaustion Kokichi had been seeing) was…kind of the opposite of projection. Doppio’s situation reminding Kaito of just…

Kokichi looked over, his eyes downturned with sadness as Kaito explained Doppio’s feelings towards his boss. And…thus, his feelings towards Byakuya. “...and it’s frustrating, not having the answers for your own situation?” he tried, after Kaito went quiet for a moment. He knew that--boiling it down--it was discomforting enough just seeing the twisted mirror of Doppio, and that it pained Kaito every time the teen lashed out at him, but…

…it wasn’t really like Kaito was on the other side of his abuse. He was still sorting through it. And seeing someone go through the same thing, and realizing just how bad it had been, but still not having the answers or the happy peace of being beyond it was…exhausting. Kaito was exhausted. 

Kaito winced, looking a little guilty, though after a moment he nodded. “I mean, yeah. I mean, I do have the answers, sort of… you need to get away from the person. And just hope–” Kaito winced again, “--you need to wait for time to make it better. Time, distance, and support through that. I feel like that’s the answer…”

“...but that still doesn’t feel good.” Kaito grumbled, putting his head in his hands, growling into his palms, “And then he just wants to call?? He wants to call and, just, fucking dig in the wounds? Like this isn’t already hard enough? What was he hoping would happen, he could yell at me and call me a coward and s-say a bunch of hurtful shit, and I’d what…?”

“...” Kaito let out a breath. Looking tired. “...like I’d apologize? Yeah, maybe… I kind of wanted to.”

Shuichi sighed, closing his eyes. 

“No, I wouldn’t. I wouldn’t. I’ve disowned him, I shouldn’t have even let him talk to me over the phone, I just…” Kaito laughed awkwardly, looking guilty, “I kept hoping maybe he’d say something that would fix this. All of it. He wouldn’t, I don’t even know that he could. But I keep hoping that maybe… if he saw how serious this was? Maybe this time he’d realize he needs to… fuck. I don’t know. Humble himself a little? At least try to talk to me… but it wasn’t like that. Even if I had said something, he was still going to talk over me, I recognized that tone. He knew exactly what he was going to say when he called, and me interacting or not interacting wasn’t going to change what he said. All I could do was stop listening.”

“...” Kaito closed his eyes. Brow furrowing tightly, his voice shaking, “...it’s so hard to stop listening.”

Kokichi nodded softly. Those were the answers of what to do, yeah. Distance yourself, give yourself time to process and heal, have support from others while you’re going through it. 

…but the ‘going through it’ part, the processing and healing was a beast of its own. Just because Kaito had taken actions to separate himself from Byakuya (his own actions, not things he was forced into or just had to go along with) didn’t mean his feelings had changed. He had just recognized that a change needed to happen. 

Something that Byakuya couldn’t recognize if it hit him over the head in cast iron. And had deposited onto Kaito with the same sort of blunt force. 

Kokichi sighed. Taking his anger…and letting it go. Before saying softly, “...I’m really proud of you, that you stopped listening. Something that difficult…Kai-chan did something difficult and brave and healthy, and I’m proud of that effort.”

“...I’m so mad at him for putting you in that position, and for everything that’s made it so it’s hard to stop listening…but I’m so proud of you. And I’m sorry it hurts. I wish it didn’t.”

Kaito took a steadying breath, before shooting Kokichi a grateful smile. “Thanks, beautiful.”

Shuichi fidgeted uncomfortably in his seat. Dr. Mariah glanced over at him. “You have something on your mind, Shuichi.”

“...” Shuichi sighed. “Did I push you to do this too quickly? It’s occurred to me that one week you were admitting the ways Byakuya abused you, and the next week I was insisting you had to disown him. And… that was a lot all at once–”

“No, no,” Kaito said quickly, shaking his head. “I won’t pretend it’s been easy, but you had a lot of real reasons you needed me to do something like this. Hell, you weren’t the one that told me to disown him, you just wanted me to see how bad he actually was. Acknowledge it. And once I had to acknowledge it, I couldn’t… not do something. That’s just not in me. Action isn’t hard, it’s just recognizing I need to take an action,” Kaito said, “And Byakuya hurt you guys. Like… badly. They all did…”

Kaito’s eyes dimmed a little. “We all did.”

Maki frowned. “...I won’t argue with that thought process. It’s nice to hear, honestly, if a little late. But we did push you to mix and merge that sense of responsibility with your abuse.”

“...” Kaito narrowed his eyes at her. “You’ve been thinking about this for a while.”

Maki shrugged.

“Still, I appreciate you worrying about me, but that’s still wrong. Honestly, if I hadn’t spent the last week desperately trying to help Doppio through the same thing? Maybe I’d be more inclined to nod along with you? But holy shit, guys, talking someone out of running back to their abusers is like pulling teeth,” Kaito said, looking exasperated, “And you guys have been dealing with my shit for years. You saw an opening. No wonder you pried that door open as hard as you could. It feels like it’s the only thing that works.”

Pff. Well, if it was fast, then at least it was on brand for them…

…merging responsibility with abuse… Yeah. Kokichi could understand that. While they were dedicated enough to each other that…Kokichi hadn’t seriously worried about Kaito’s continued relations and positivity about his family being a relationship-ender…it had been close. And for them, who had gone through things that would definitely be relationship-enders for other people just further dedicated…that was saying a lot. 

Kaito had been shoved into the deep end, made to directly confront his abuse or risk losing the positive relationships he’d cultivated. It was the sort of choice that could rip someone apart, not because it was difficult to choose, but just that the act was agony. 

…it meant a lot, that Kaito was pushing himself through it. 

But that wasn’t what he was talking about. 

Kokichi frowned softly. “...one of the days before…things kicked off, I guess… You apologized to me about behavior that you recognized in Doppio, that you’d had before. Is…that kind of the same thing? …I don’t think I…” Kokichi’s eyebrows raised a little. “Oh. Is this less of a problem and more of a…’holy shit this sucks’ kind of thing?”

Kaito chuckled. “Blatantly a ‘holy shit this sucks’ kind of thing. It’s hard being the person trying to help someone who’s blatantly in denial, and kinda pissed at you, and punishes you for everything you do or say to help… augh. Uuuuuuugh.” Kaito groaned, rolling his head back, “Ugh. That’s such a trial. I put you through so much shit.”

Dr. Mariah hummed, sipping at her tea. “...Kaito. Were you angry with Kokichi? Him specifically? Or did you offer this apology to everyone?”

Kaito hesitated. “...no. I only said it to Kokichi.”

Dr. Mariah nodded. “Let’s talk about that. This is all more than a recent development. From the way you reference it, Kaito, you consider this a problem from early in your relationship. Punishing Kokichi for trying to help you?”

“Um, yeah, but… I don’t know. I don’t know if I can explain exactly what it was like, in the beginning. I mean… the conditioning didn’t make it easy to communicate with me. But, well…” Kaito looked away, guilt flashing in his eyes, “...it’s not like I couldn’t control how I dodged the conversations. And sometimes I’d… make it shitty, ya know… on purpose. So Kokichi would stop talking about it…”

“...well, you did talk about apologizing to Shuu-chan later, when he wasn’t busy reading,” Kokichi shrugged sheepishly, but…well. Yeah. What actually happened had meaning too. 

Giving Kaito a soft look, Kokichi sighed. “...I appreciate you apologizing for that. And at risk of going all, ‘no it was actually my fault’? I know, early on, there was so much I just…didn’t understand back then. That I just made assumptions about, like if you had conditioning at all, or how it actually affected your behavior, and I let myself act with just those assumptions rather than trying to learn more, or asking you about it, and…even if there was stuff you couldn’t say? That still wasn’t fair to you. Just…everything about the Memorial Garden showed that.”

“I kept trying to ask why the cracks aren’t patched while you were trying to hold the foundation together,” Kokichi smiled faintly, fondness glimmering in his eyes. “I think we both could’ve been kinder to each other. So…I’m sorry I wasn’t. And I accept your apology for you not being.”

“Yeah, I need to apologize to you guys too,” Kaito said, though he went quiet as Kokichi explained his side of things. He laughed faintly at the familiar metaphor, before reminding him, “Well, I was ready to tear your foundations apart, for a minute there, regardless of you insisting it was just cracks, so… yeah. We were a lot, at each other.  Sometimes we weren’t kind. Even when we were trying to be… and Maki, Shuichi–”

“Don’t,” Maki said, shaking her head, “I still feel responsible for how Kokichi handled you in the beginning of your relationship. I talked in his ear a lot, specifically for my own benefit. If you struggled to communicate, a good part of it was my fault.”

“You’re not wrong… but that’s ignoring why you had to do that.” Kaito frowned. “I put you in an impossible situation. Not on purpose, but I still had a hand in it, even if all it was was you not feeling like it was safe to come to me for help. Besides, don’t pretend like you didn’t believe the things you were telling Kokichi. Manipulation like what you’re suggesting would mean you made things up. I know what you told him. You believed all of it. Some of it was true. You just… ignored other things because it wasn’t convenient. That doesn’t mean you lied.”

Dr. Mariah listened carefully. In truth, this was going splendidly. Which meant she was missing something. Some raw nerve that made Kaito feel like this was a crisis. If it was just about the family talking, they could have done this at a park by themselves. There was something Kaito was struggling to express… she just wasn’t sure what it was yet.

“What about you, Shuichi?” Dr. Mariah asked, “Anything you want to add in?”

Shuichi sighed. “Maki and I didn’t lie about anything… well, except keeping the assassination plot to ourselves. And the wall. The wall was a lie. But Kaito’s conditioning, our fears for him and of him, his relationship with Byakuya… maybe our analysis wasn’t flawless, but it was still honest. Before Kokichi went inside of Kaito’s head and physically pushed Byakuya out–”

“Tengan,” Kaito said.

“...right. Sorry, I misspoke,” Shuichi said, “Until Kokichi removed the conditioning? Then no, Kaito couldn’t say no to Byakuya, not in ways that mattered. And I still think Kaito’s relationship with Byakuya affected his relationship with Kokichi. That wasn’t all in our heads. Kaito struggled to treat Kokichi like he wasn’t a substitute for Byakuya–”

“Don’t,” Kaito suddenly growled. Clearing his throat when Shuichi paused. “...don’t do that. I don’t care if maybe it was true in some way, don’t fucking… I loved Kokichi for my own damn reasons, back when all of this started, same way I did Byakuya. Separate reasons. Sure, I… mixed them. In my head. Sometimes. But that doesn’t mean the choices I did make didn’t matter. That doesn’t mean my thoughts and feelings didn’t matter!”

“Calm, Kaito,” Dr. Mariah cautioned, “Take a sip of your tea.”

Kaito grimaced, sipping at his tea. “...sorry. Sorry. That’s exactly the sort of bullshit reasoning I’m apologizing for, I think. I swear, me and Doppio have had the exact same conversation days ago… It's heartbreaking. I don’t know what to say.”

Dr. Mariah thought about it. Humming… “I think we may be making a mistake in how we’re approaching certain aspects of your abuse, Kaito,” Dr. Mariah said. “And I think that same mistake is affecting you when you’re trying to relate to Doppio. You had… Well, in truth you had many abusers. But the two main ones had very different influences and roles in your abuse. And I think we have a habit of mixing and matching them as if they’re interchangeable. You keep referencing Byakuya when you discuss Doppio, but I think it might be more comparable to say Doppio is dealing with a Tengan. Whether he loves him or not.”

Kokichi frowned a bit at Shuuichi. Not reprimanding, but… He knew that Shuuichi and Maki had believed that, in Kaito’s mind at the start, Kokichi had been a substitute for Byakuya, point blank. There had been a time where Kokichi had believed that and worried over it. But…looking back now? It felt more correct that both he and Byakuya had occupied similar ‘roles’ to Kaito, but he did see and treat them as individuals. Kokichi couldn’t’ve just put on a blond wig and Kaito would’ve treated him the same way. 

…and while the fact that Kaito had seen them both as…infallible, and above him, power-wise? Their differences had mattered. Kaito’s different feelings had mattered. And not conflating those things now, mattered. 

…as well as not conflating other things. 

Nodding slowly, Kokichi frowned. “...I think, in Doppio’s feelings for his boss, Kai-chan has made apt comparisons to Byakuya. Even when we first met, you told me from the beginning that Tengan was creepy and manipulative, even if you were inclined to respect his authority. For a long time, you struggled to insinuate anything negative about Byakuya…and that’s something I can see in Doppio. I don’t think that’s conflating people, to make that comparison.”

Kaito nodded. “Yeah, I kinda feel the same way about it. Like, there’s a reason I keep referencing Byakuya,” Kaito said, looking to Dr. Mariah. “It’s that idolization that’s frustrating.”

Dr. Mariah looked undisturbed, as she continued, “Right… may I do a thought experiment with you?”

Kaito suddenly looked tired. “You can, but it's been a long day. Could you please just explain the point you want me to get to first? I know why you do it, but I hate having to guess what you’re looking for. I just don’t know if I have that in me today.”

“Understood,” Dr. Mairah said, clasping her hands together, thinking of how to explain. “Perhaps what I’m really trying to say is that, at least in this conversation, while you were able to handle the aspects of Doppio’s situation that reminded you of Byakuya? As in, the idolization, the delusions, the difficulty in accepting realities of abuse and the challenge of change… you’ve seemed sad. But not in crisis.”

“But, briefly, we discussed that Doppio had apparently been drowned?” Dr. Mariah said, “And you could barely talk about it. You grit your teeth, your shoulders went up, struggling to say it even happened.”

“Yeah, I guess that’s true… who wouldn’t react like that?” Kaito said tiredly, “It’s horrifying.”

“It’s closer to the type of abuse Tengan forced onto you,” Dr. Mariah said. “Byakuya was, arguably, a ‘passive’ abuser. Certainly, in your childhood, he was guided in a structured, almost ritualistic setting to harm you in physical ways. But past that phase in your life, Byakuya’s abuse was largely emotional. He’d berate you, make you feel small, make you feel unintelligent. Things that were by and large just a regrettable aspect of his personality. Things he arguably learned to do by the ‘active’ abuser in your life.”

“Tengan was your active abuser. The one that Kokichi literally had to push out of your mind, because he still had not let up on the physical act of abusing you into your adulthood. Something I’m certain a part of your mind is aware of.” Dr. Mariah said, “Maybe he never touched you during the sessions he guided Byakuya through, but I highly doubt to you, at the other end of that abuse, that nuance obscured who the person actively hurting you was. Tengan said hit, and Byakuya would hit. But it was still Tengan actively ensuring the physical abuse would happen. The pain, the humiliation, the degradation that made you not just unintelligent, but subhuman. That wasn’t Byakuya. That was Tengan.”

“So, my thought experiment would be this,” Dr. Mariah said. “What, when helping Doppio, have been the things that made you react? Viscerally. What didn’t make you sad, or frustrated, but felt like a physical, violent force, running through you? Can you find a theme?”

Kaito thought about it.

“...” He curled his hands into fists, before bringing his hand up. Nibbling on his thumb joint a little, the tension in his face increasing. “...we… we had to pump his chest… of  course that would get the most physical reaction out of me. That fucker… tortured him… who wouldn’t be affected by that…”

“You compared his abuse against Shuichi and Maki, and things they couldn’t remember, as a reason why your reflection on your own abuse isn’t adequate,” Dr. Mariah said. “I think that’s because his abuse reminds you of the violence of Tengan’s abuse. And Tengan is someone you can’t disown, or make any meaningful, symbolic gesture for. Tengan was just someone who hurt you badly, and then left. And all you can do, at least in this moment, is live with the reality of that.”

Kaito scoffed, looking away. His hands starting to shake.

…oh. Huh. The…well, for simplification of terms, ‘Byakuya’ side of Doppio’s abuse was mostly what they had talked about. Kaito expressing his frustration and regrets. So, naturally that’s what Kokichi focused on too, because…

…of course he noticed how angry Kaito got, when the actual physicality of Doppio’s abuse came up. Because, who wouldn’t?! Who wouldn’t be infuriated by someone hitting and torturing child? Doppio’s interview had been horrifying to sit through, listening to him explain just how his boss had hurt him…and Kokichi only kept himself from bursting into tears because he could see just how detached Doppio had become, just trying to get through the words. And…it had been more important to make sure the teen got through it safely. 

Kaito’s feelings had made perfect sense to Kokichi. So…he hadn’t bothered looking further. 

Despite knowing full well that his husband had been physically abused by a patriarchal figure too. 

It wasn’t just anger and horror… Kokichi looked over to Kaito, and felt disappointed in himself. It was fear and the frustration of…stasis and lack of closure too. 

“...I could make a memory of him for you to beat up?” Kokichi softly offered, feeling a little like it was a joke in poor taste, for how sincere the offer was. “If it’s…like something building up, that you want to take action against.”

Kaito’s fists clenched harder, his shoulders rising up… but after a moment he let that tension go. Murmuring uncertainly, “Yeah? Maybe… My anger’s pretty physical, we all know that… If it wouldn’t hurt you, I guess.”

Kaito closed his eyes, running his hand over his forehead. “...he’s dead, right? Like… like in all the ways that matter, I guess? He’s dead? I mean… I know he is. You’ve told me. I just…”

“...it wouldn’t be fair to talk to the guy who replaced him, I think,” Kaito said softly. “Because all I want to do is ask him questions he wouldn’t have the answer for. Like… like why? Was there anything I could have done? Could I have stopped it if I was just enough of… anything? I know we’ve all talked about that already, but… I can’t imagine anyone doing those things to anyone else I know. To you guys, or Byakuya, or Kaede… I know they must have happened to you and Maki,” Kaito said, looking to Shuichi, who just sighed, “Especially you, Maki… things I don’t know about? That you wouldn’t tell me about…”

“In my sessions?” Maki said, “The reason we’ve worked out that I’ve been able to let go of most of that is because I did get both my revenge, and I’ve also gotten closure through conversation. Mr. Nidai, for all intents and purposes, was my abuser. Or, was the guy who had to be. And I understood why it was happening, when it was happening… Maybe that’s the difference. There’s no confusion, with my situation. I’ve even been able to talk to Mr. Nidai about things I have struggled to let go of. Things that I didn’t realize still bothered me. We talked about the doll…”

Maki closed her eyes, a recent memory filling her, before she let out that memory in a slightly shuddering breath. “I’ve gotten closure on a lot of memories that have haunted me. And, honestly, I’ll still be talking about it in therapy, and it’d probably still hurt if I was, say, given a copy of myself a week ago and had to figure it out for that little idiot too. Only so many governments you can restructure to your liking.”

“And, honestly, more importantly than all of that?” Shuichi said, “...it’s just not a competition, Kaito. You and I have talked about the physical side of your abuse. I told you a lot of mine too. It was all awful. You’re allowed to admit it’s getting to you.”

“I don’t even really think I’m trying to compare our situations,” Kaito admitted, “I think I just keep hoping you guys will talk about them and then it won’t just be me talking and feeling… weird and… yeah. But if you guys aren’t up to that, then… I don’t know. It's hard to talk about. Maybe it’d be nice just to take Kokichi up on his offer. Just knock around a dummy until I feel less shitty about things.”

“Okay,” Dr. Mariah said. “Why don’t we make that a homework then? Kaito, you can try working through some of your feelings on Tengan in a physical way, which at the very least, I would think, would give you room to actually think about it more in a way that might be constructive to the next time we discuss it in therapy. I know you’re still hurting on the subject now, but this is one of those things you seem to struggle to communicate about. Prepping personally for more discussion on it could be very helpful… along with talking to Miss Crystal about this. A practical exercise with Kokichi, and a one on one session with Miss Crystal. That would be good steps in the right direction, for reconciling with this aspect of your abuse.”

“Okay… again, only if it’s not gonna hurt you, Kokichi. There’s other ways I can physically vent,” Kaito said, looking to Kokichi. “There’s this weird, like, rage dump place nearby? I could throw around garbage… heh. Same diff,” Kaito said, grinning awkwardly, “Right?”

Kokichi sighed, eyes growing a little tired. “He’s dead. It’s been months, but…at least the last time I talked to them, Kazuo did want to try to make things up to you somehow, but not because they have any answers. They were just as in the dark as you. Probably more, honestly. Getting anything…real, from Tengan is…not an option anymore.”

“...so maybe it wouldn’t be even close to enough…but I think fighting a proxy could still help. It’s helped me, at least.” And maybe Shuuichi, but Kokichi wasn’t going to force his husband to bring that up. 

And it was exactly the kind of closure that Kaito wouldn’t be able to get, but…Kokichi gave Maki a soft look. Happy that she was getting to work through things. Happy that she could talk with her father about it. Even not knowing the details, Kokichi…struggled, knowing, approximately, the sorts of things Nekomaru had put Maki through. But there was a key point that had allowed Kokichi to forge a relationship with the man, that differentiated him from Tengan or Doppio’s boss. They had tortured children of their own accord. Nekomaru had been given an impossible ultimatum, and had hurt his children so they would survive. 

…Kokichi didn’t think he could truly feel like that point absolved Nekomaru of blame. There was still a part of him that felt that there could’ve been other ways…but he also knew that was splitting hairs, to a point. That things ‘less horrific’, well…would’ve still mattered, but still would’ve been bad. Seeing Maki’s struggles, and knowing of her siblings…Kokichi didn’t think he would be able to fully lift those from Nekomaru’s shoulders. 

But it was enough that he could respect Maki’s love, and appreciate her life, in order to respect the man, and genuinely hope for happier days for him. 

As Dr. Mariah made it an ‘actual’ assignment, Kokichi nodded before returning Kaito’s grin. “Right. And it won’t hurt me--I think I’d mind-barf everywhere if I made it so I was wearing a Tengan costume. Making a memory for you won’t hurt me…and if you’re okay with that, I’d like to be there to make sure it doesn’t hurt you, either,” he said softly. 

Kaito smiled. “I’m lucky to have you… yeah. I mean, I don’t know how much it’ll help, but maybe it’ll be a little bit like rubbing my rock? Like, the act itself might be useless, but it does calm me down enough to figure out why I’m so upset.”

“Plus you’d have the memory of punching Tengan,” Shuichi pointed out.

Kaito snorted. “If I can bring myself to do it? Sure, that’s true, that could be nice.”

“It sort of sounds like we’re wrapping up?” Maki asked, looking to Dr. Mariah.

“Emergency sessions can either be very short or very long. They really just go on as long as they need to.” Dr. Mariah nodded, standing up from her seat. “And while it’s not exactly ‘resolved’, I do feel we’ve taken it to a point where it’s not immediately self destructive. That said? We should have a proper session soon. It’s not good to space these things out too long if you can help it.”

“Wait, before you go, Dr. Mariah?” Maki said, standing up as well, “Do you have time? There’s a potential client in Doppio for you; we were hoping since you’re here anyway, you could interview with him. If it doesn’t work, we’d need some recommendations.”

Dr. Mariah raised an eyebrow. “For my relationship expertise, or…”

“The other thing,” Maki said.

“Ah. Certainly… Is he prepared now?” Dr. Mariah asked.

“We can get him up and moving,” Kaito said, “Or, Maki can; Doppio doesn’t realize the rest of us knows about that sort of thing. Just Maki. Maki figured it’d be for the best to limit how much he knows about us, and I think I agree. No reason for him to know those parts of our lives.”

“I see, well.” Dr. Mariah looked to Maki. “Lead the way.”

-

It was weird, sleeping in, but there was a part of Doppio that enjoyed it. Maybe it was just because he was so exhausted, and his muscles hurt…but getting more time to snuggle with Arven (and Chief) (...and Amaina) was nice, and by the time Doppio stopped feeling so cloudy headed, things did seem better. 

…to a point. Having to get his arm re-wrapped because, uh, apparently he’d bruised it the night before wasn’t great. But in the grand scheme of things, Doppio was willing to take that as a downside to the morning. He and Arven were just coming back to their room after dropping off their dishes at the kitchen when Doppio noticed Maki walking towards them. Maki and…a young girl just…decked out in an intricate fashion. Now this was a person who could actually be on Boss’s level when it came to personal fashion…

Doppio paused in the hall, his thoughts getting away from him as he stared blankly at the approaching duo.

Dr. Mariah tasted the air, and…

…huh.

Her nose wrinkled, ever so slightly, before her expression settled. Not because he smelled foul. More just… it was a strong scent. Shockingly strong. It’s not like everyone smelled potently all the time, usually only when they were highly emotional, but this one…

It was like there was no filter.

Hm.

“Doppio. Arven.” Maki said, approaching the two boys before gesturing to the woman in question, “You asked me for a recommendation. This is Dr. Mariah. She’s our relationship therapist, and my personal therapist. She is schooled in… a lot of stuff. I can’t be bothered to remember all of it.”

“Group relationships, childhood addiction, trauma counseling,” Dr. Mariah said, “To name my major areas of expertise. Good day, Doppio, Arven. I’ve been told you need someone within my range of knowledge. If I am not interrupting anything, may I do an interview with you, Doppio?”

Arven stared at the child that Maki, for some reason, was trying to pass off as a therapist. Were they… being hazed…?

Doppio blinked. For a moment confused just in the same way Arven was, because…look, he knew he wasn’t one to talk, but he was pretty sure therapists had to do a lot of school or something to get their qualifications, and this girl looked even younger than him and…

Oh. 

He wasn’t one to talk. 

A small, tentative hope lit up in Doppio’s chest as he gave…Dr. Mariah a hesitant wave. “Um, hello. Uh…” That hope soon gave way to pure trepidation. “...what…kind of interview?”

“One where mostly you decide if you’d like to continue seeing me for regular therapy sessions,” Dr. Mariah explained, her long black hair curling around her shoulders as she looked up at Doppio, if only a little bit. “I can also decide that I may not be the best fit for you as your therapist, and recommend others for you to interview as well. But on the whole, it’s just an opportunity to sit down and get a read on how compatible we are as therapist and patient.”

“You. You still struggling to walk?” Maki said, looking to Arven, “Let me walk you back to your room, these two can find a study to talk in.”

Arven frowned, looking to Doppio. “...I won’t leave if you don’t want me too.”

Oh… That didn’t seem too bad. It wasn’t like the two other interviews he’d had lately, so…Doppio would take it! It wasn’t really judging him, well, a little, but not leaving him out to dry, and… Well. He hoped this wasn’t just another case of someone telling him, oh, of course you had a choice! And then things just happening anyway. 

…huh. Maybe he was an optimist. He’d never thought so. 

Doppio blinked, looking a little dazed, before he gave Arven a soft look. “...I think I’ll be okay. I’ll meet you back at our room?”

“...though, uh… Where would a study be?” he asked Maki, chewing on his lip. “I haven’t explored that much…”

Maki gave them both small instructions, before shuffling Arven away. Arven still glanced over his shoulder at Doppio, but allowed himself to go, trusting that it’d be okay. After all, uh… Dr. Mariah was very small. What real harm could she do?

Finding the study, Dr. Mariah closed the door, before going to open some window curtains. “Let a bit of sun in,” she murmured, before collapsing her hands together, “Though, it’s a bit chilly, isn’t it…”

Heading over to the fireplace, Dr. Mariah opened the cage. “Ah, needs some wood,” she said, glancing at the pile built up on the other side of the fireplace. “Doppio, would you please help me stack some wood in here? I’m going to start a fire, ease some of the chill today.”

“Oh, o-okay!” Sure, it was a little cool, he guessed, but…well. If she said she was cold, it wasn’t like starting up a fire would be much of a hassle. He’d just have to remember to smother it and dump the ashes and…hm. He’d have to ask around where to dump everything… There was a brush with the poker stand, he could see, but maybe he could find a clean bucket and clean the fireplace properly later too…

Dutifully stacking the wood, Doppio let out a small hum. “Um, so… I guess Maki probably would’ve mentioned I-I’m, um, looking for a therapist, well, obviously…but. Did…she explain any more than that? Sorry, I can’t expect you to know everything from the go but I-I’m just wondering, ah, what… How much you know? …if that’s alright.”

“She did mention that you would only come to her for a therapist if you were looking for advice on certain types of things,” Dr. Mariah said, motioning for Doppio to step back from the fireplace now that he had set up the logs.

Putting her finger in her mouth, she made a small, low humming sound. It sounded less like a hum, and more like a rumble. It came from the very bottom of her throat, and when she slid her finger out of her mouth, it was covered in a strange, odd smelling slime. Then, snapping her finger, the slime ignited into a small flame, and swelling up her throat into a ball, Dr. Mariah blew against the fire at the tip of her finger, it spitting like a fiery faucet against the wood, which immediately caught on fire, going up quickly.

Taking out a handkerchief, she wiped her finger down, before going to close the cage to trap the fire inside. “I do believe I will be able to help you with those aspects of your life, yes, if you do decide to trust me with them. Let’s take a seat, shall we?”

Σ(⊙ロ⊙)

Doppio had stood back from the fireplace, but he remained there, jaw dropped and eyes wide in shock. Just…pure amazement. …some part of him supposed that he’d just been made a point, but…he couldn’t even be mad. That was…

“...that was so cool, what the heck???” Doppio muttered, still blown away, even as he got his body to move and find its way to a chair. Though after a moment, he seemed to collect himself and he gave Dr. Mariah a more serious look. “Oh. Um. You would prefer if I don’t tell anyone that, right?” His brow furrowed. “...though I think il angioletto following me around might know already. …shoot, uh, should’ve…prefaced with that, probably…”

“Il angioletto?” Dr. Mariah said, glancing around, before saying, “Well, if there’s going to be more parties to this interview, might as well make them all present. Please show yourself presently, angel.”

Amaina appeared right. In front. Of Dr. Mariah’s eyes. So close that her own wide eyed gaze shined back at her in the reflection of Dr. Mariah’s pupils.

O.O

OoO THAT WAS COOOOOL do it again!

“Ah,” Dr. Mariah said, “A chibi. A powerful one too… how extraordinary. But, this is a somewhat professional environment, young lady. You see how we are both in armchairs?” Dr. Mariah said, gesturing to herself and Doppio, “Manifest yourself one presently and take a seat.”

Amaina looked at the armchairs, before looking to a night stand that was positioned between the two armchairs. After a second, a fairly large, though still doll sized, armchair landed on top of the nightstand, and Amaina– in her own intricate, laced dress now, clearly inspired by Dr. Mariah’s– sat down in it, saying in a strange accent that sounded nothing like Dr. Mariah but gave a strange sort of haughty presence, Okay now we are all prepaaaaaared and we can get therapizing I will go first I am HAPPY quite a bit though sometimes i am sad.

“Very well done. It can be intimidating to open up in therapy, especially in these early stages,” Dr. Mariah said, nodding at the little chibi, who nodded sagely back. “That said? I am holding you accountable for not derailing the interview, or any future sessions, to Doppio’s detriment. Do not put me in a position where I must kick you out of the proceedings. Do you understand, construct?”

OnO ….fiiiiiiiine.

“Very good,” Dr. Mariah said, looking to Doppio, “In truth, I know almost nothing about your situation, beyond that you are currently dealing with a difficult homelife, and that you felt the need to reach out to a magical therapist. I have heard things in more detail in regards to that homelife, things the guards at the castle may know, but even then I don’t know any details, and I have no reason to treat anything I’ve heard as inherently true. I’d prefer to know what’s going on in your life from you. You are the most reliable source, when it comes to what you are currently experiencing.”

“So,” Dr. Mariah said, her dark eyes shimmering in the firelight, “If we were to see each other regularly. What’s something you would like to get out of our time together, Doppio?”

Chibi? Nell had said ‘Fusion’ too. Doppio knew he wasn’t the person to ask about all this…magic bullshit--present case affirming that--but…something about those terms seemed specific. 

…at least Dr. Mariah was treating Amaina kindly. Where Nell had been amazed and curious, Dr. Mariah was…well. Treating Amaina like a little kid, but not in a patronizing way. Just meeting Amaina’s whims head on. It was impressive, honestly… Maybe giving Amaina ideas or prompts to interact with what they were doing more would be a good idea. …Doppio hadn’t exactly had much of a chance to make her a little meal since…

Doppio blinked, startling a little as he tuned back into what Dr. Mariah was saying, really…hoping he hadn’t missed anything too important. 

…what would he like? …uhh…

Doppio’s expression settled into worry. “...um… Look. I…know I am real. But I don’t really know a better way to…initially describe it? Though every way kinda sucks…um.”

Scratching at his wrist, Doppio gnawed on his lip. “...so, yesterday I found out I’m not… Well. I guess I’m…human adjacent? And didn’t really exist past, like, a year and a half ago? And we think I might be immortal. Um…”

He started to sweat a little. “...I’m not. Doing well with that.”

“I see,” Dr. Mariah said, tapping at her armchair, giving Doppio a considering look. “Well, first of all, congratulations on being born. That’s quite a difficult process for anyone, and you seem to be recovering well for the recent strain of it. That’s not something I say as a joke, let’s be clear. There is a reason infants must be so dedicatedly cared for. It is not a simple process, to learn how to be alive. You seem to be doing exceptionally well for your situation.”

“Also, I am curious who suggested to you that you may be immortal,” Dr. Mariah said, tilting her head a little. “That’s a lofty claim, and one that’s difficult to prove or even conceptualize, for most people. Some people use that term to replace ‘long living’ or ‘difficult to kill’. To be truly immortal is almost unheard of.”

There was a part of Doppio that wanted to protest being called a baby, but…well. Even if his body was…a little weird. And his mind more developed than the average 2-year-old…he was technically, uh…new. But what hit a little more was just…how genuine that congratulations was and…Doppio didn’t really know…what to do with that. “...um. Thank you? Thanks.”

…it was hard, being alive. …if he was ex… 吉_吉 hm. 

“Uh…” Doppio sighed, giving Dr. Mariah a strained look before he got out his notebook, flipping through for a dog-eared page. “...there’s…apparently a lot of science I don’t…really get. So, um…”

Reading from the page, he said, “My cells don’t degrade, even when separated from my body, and when damaged, they will repair the original cell, rather than generating new ones. So, uh…I probably won’t age, and, like…injury wouldn’t kill me. I think?”

Glancing up, he shrugged a little, clearly out of his depth. “...even if I am just long living or hard to kill…to me that’s pretty much the same thing, right now. S’not like I’m gearing to go out with a sign on my back that says, ‘stab here’.”

“I see. While calling it immortality seems still too early to call, we can discuss the emotional ramifications more in the future. As you said, even a long life can sometimes be more than the average person can cope with. Thankfully, I am uniquely qualified to help someone grasp a long life. Like you, I am arguably ‘human-adjacent’. I was a human, a very long time ago. Now I’m not, but I do still remember the processing part of that transition, and more importantly, I’ve worked with others going through the same thing.”

Tapping her chair, Dr. Mariah suddenly said seriously, “In many ways that matter? Your situation… is not unique. Perhaps this specific blending of situations is, or the context around it. But being born, and learning to live your life, and learning to cope with a future that is unknowable? Regardless of the context, these are very normal fears and issues to have. It is something I, and many people, are more than qualified to help you with, and it is something that does not ostracize you from any groups inherently.”

“What I mean to say is,” Dr. Mariah said, “You are not alone in this. It is very manageable. Even if the context for why you feel these things is potentially more unique than some.”

“So. You are human-adjacent. You are likely very, very durable,” Dr. Mariah listed, “A good start. Let’s try to pick at least one more, though you can add as many as you like, for issues you’d like to start exploring first in our sessions. What else are you looking to get out of this?”

Doppio nodded a bit. Nell had kinda said the same thing. While it was something to be aware of on the horizon…2 was a little early to start worrying about the long stretch of the future. It might just be him, but Doppio was a little more concerned with just making it through the week. And not just because he’d had a very awful week. 

And while Nell had said he wasn’t alone too? As had Arven? …it was nice to hear from this new person too. 

Looking around the room, Doppio thought about what else he’d want help with… And he frowned. Eyes deadening a bit as gloom started to settle over him like a cloud. “The, uh…stuff you’ve heard around… Um.” Doppio took a breath. “...the…guy CPS is gonna…mess with, on my behalf, my boss…um. We think my boss might’ve been the one to, uh…” He grimaced. “...make me. So that’d…sort of make him my dad. But without all this this stuff, a-and what I knew at the time…CPS is treating it like a kidnapping case. Which…would be worse than just child abuse. A-and I’d plead for that charge to be taken off, but…”

Doppio wilted more. “...I don’t think he’d ever claim me. And…so it’d be useless with just my claim. The charge wouldn’t be taken off…”

Doppio blinked a few times, before looking back up at Dr. Mariah. “...wait, you’re a relationship counselor too, right? I might need some of that sort of advice too. I’m done asking Kaito.”

Kaito, hm? Alright…

Dr. Mariah made a few more mental notes, though she restrained from pulling her notebook out. She had a feeling Doppio wouldn’t appreciate seeing her write things down, even if, historically, she never did.

“It’s really more important to me how you feel about your ‘boss’ being your father, rather than working out how you could use that claim to help him,” Dr. Mariah told him plainly. “One of the trade-offs for total confidentiality is that, legally speaking, convincing me of something is a zero-sum game. I can’t testify on your, or his, behalf, not as a character witness, not for anyone. What you and I discuss in these sessions? Only matters between the two of us. Unless you say something, like, you’re going to go kill someone tonight? I cannot utilize anything you say here to anyone, for anyone’s benefit.”

“I am a relationship counselor, yes. I am, in fact, quite good at it. I’m certain I can be utilized for anything you may need in that realm as well…” Dr. Mariah tapped at her chair. “There seemed to be some tension there, in that statement about Kaito. We can also discuss that. Even though he is another one of my patients, it is not a conflict of interest for me to discuss any issues you may have with him, though in defense of his privacy, I cannot give you information about him I learn from my sessions with him.”

She paused. “Or vice-versa.”

Doppio sighed softly. He figured as much--therapy was a ‘feeling’ thing, not an ‘action’ thing--but…well. That was as comforting as it was frustrating. The princes had assured him that therapy was something he could use without things getting out everywhere, and he had put his trust in that, being much more candid than he normally would just off the bat for things. 

…Dr. Mariah had also breathed fire immediately, so that helped, admittedly. 

Though as she talked about…committing a murder, Doppio jolted, staring at her with wide, alarmed eyes. Wh-what?! He wasn’t gonna do that anymore! He promised! A-and it had never been his choice in the first place, he didn’t plan murders--oh. Um… That was…probably a pure example, wasn’t it…

Sighing, letting go of that tension, he gave Dr. Mariah a mildly exasperated look. “...I’d really hope so. The reason I’m done going to Kaito for advice is…is ‘cause he just tells everyone what I tell him! And that just keeps happening!” Doppio huffed, sitting back in his chair with crossed arms. “...so if you wouldn’t, I’d appreciate it.”

“Legally, I am not allowed to,” Dr. Mariah said. “I’d lose my license doing so, along with a whole host of other infringements that could lose me my position and all of my other clients, and leave me, mmm… I’m not sure. I wouldn’t be able to work with classified material at all anymore so… I suppose I could work at a fish humanitarian? I’m quite good at taking care of fish.” Dr. Mariah smiled lightly. “But I’d much rather continue being a therapist, ultimately. But…”

This was actually an idea she had gotten talking to Miss Crystal, the two meeting up to, not talk specifically about the things their groups said, but absolutely to lament and vent a little about their patients to the Other Person Who’d Get It… while also giving each other hints about things they might want to nudge on. You know that family stuff he’s real shy about? Maaaaybe he’s in a better place to talk about it these days… no, I’m not talking about Maki, Maki’s mine, you lost out on Maki. Who knows about Shuichi, we really should insist Dr. Ford meet us for these brunches…

But the idea had been sound, and if Dr. Mariah had been more aware of Kaito’s trust issues from the beginning, she’d have done this much sooner, as she pulled out a small pamphlet from her purse, reaching over Amaina’s head to pass it to Doppio, as she explained, “This is actually the full list of things I am and am not allowed to do with my patients. It’s clear, simple to read, and legally absolutely binding. And, in that last page? Is a list of illegal hypotheticals to give patients a better idea of things to look out for that might not feel illegal in the moment. Assignments outside of the session are not legal requirements, there is no grading system in place to determine how well you are doing at therapy, there are no hard goals that can be assigned to you that you’re meant to prioritize over anything else, and you cannot be ‘assigned’ an additional or substitute therapist. Oh, one of the biggest ones? A therapist cannot assign and provide you with drugs individually. They can only recommend a drug, then send you to a doctor to get that recommendation approved, and then a pharmacist will actually provide the drug. Do not take anything any therapist hands you as a ‘prescription’. Thankfully the therapeutic community has rooted out most of this scam, but that was quite a problem ten years ago, drug dealers masquerading as therapists. Oh, on the very back is an explanation of how to verify a therapist is certified by the guild, if you ever suspect your therapist may not be entirely authentic.” 

“Do you have any questions, regarding all of that?” Dr. Mariah asked, leaning back.

Fish? …oh, hadn’t…someone talked about being able to pet roof fish? That was cool…

Doppio took the pamphlet with a raised eyebrow, looking it over…but having to pause as Dr. Mariah gave a verbal overview, his brows furrowing more the longer she went on. It was…a lot. Which was good, he supposed. He’d never really dealt with them himself, but he knew legal agreements were hefty, just to account for all loopholes and possibilities, and it was important for people to know what they were agreeing to…he guessed. 

Putting the pamphlet in his notebook for safekeeping, Doppio blinked blankly a few times. “Um…I don’t…think so. Mostly, I’m just kinda trusting Maki’s vouch here, a-and the fact that you did that fire-breathing thing, which…I dunno. It feels like a weird thing to do if you were trying to trick me.”

Doppio went blank for a few moments, before a nervously considering expression settled over his face. “...I think I might wanna try out getting high.”

“It’d certainly put me in a bit of a predicament, if you spread that around. Not too many beings out there who can produce flammable fuel, let alone have the skin texture to ignite it safely. It’s a rare innate ability, the sort of thing that could make people look upon me in an undesirable way,” Dr. Mariah agreed.

At the next thing… Dr. Mariah reserved herself. She had a small desire to smile. She hadn’t had a teenage patient in almost two years now. It could be cute, the things they wanted to talk about.

“Understandable. Most people get curious about recreational drugs at some point in their lives. Tell me… have you ever had any history with addictive behavior? Have you ever noticed addictive behavior in your potential father?” she asked.

OvO he’s addicted to meeeeee~

“He, I imagine, enjoys your company. Not the same thing,” Dr. Mariah explained. “Addictive behavior becomes a compulsion, to the point of self-destruction. If he’s ever liked something so much that he couldn’t help doing it, even if it caused him harm, then it’s an addiction.”

So that was a rare thing, then? Kinda seemed like a bummer--being able to make good fire fodder and ignite it seemed really helpful. And, as Dr. Mariah had done, made for some very cool demonstrations. 

Doppio smiled softly at Amaina before humming, thinking it over. “Um… I don’t think so? He used to drink more, but he stopped, well, not like fully stopped, but, like, a normal amount, I think, and he used to drink coffee, like, all the time, but I got him to start drinking tea at least at night…” Doppio’s expression suddenly dropped at that. 

…who was making Boss tea now?

“...don’t think I have any either,” he murmured. “I don’t gamble, and I don’t drink much, and I was forbidden from doing any sort of drugs from my job… W…which is kinda why I’m curious now. I…uh…” Doppio’s gaze went shifty. “...I have a friend that does recreational stuff every now and then, a-and he’s never pressured me into doing anything, but…I dunno. M kinda curious what it’s like. Or…what my body will decide it’s like, anyway.”

“Again, there’s nothing wrong with curiosity. But, it’s important to remember that with things like drugs and alcohol, along with many other addictive habits, you have to be honest with yourself what you’re capable of handling, avoid things that could potentially seriously harm either you physically or your ability to make good decisions for yourself, and most importantly, be aware of when you’re showing signs of addiction, and be ready to cut the substance out entirely when that happens.” Dr. Mariah said, “That can be a true, life destroying obstacle, and for some people, just facing the reality of that isn’t worth trying the recreational substance out at all.”

“But,” Dr. Mariah said, “I am not actually a believer in an abstinence-only philosophy when it comes to addictive substances. I think it’s unrealistic, and doesn’t account for things people become addicted to that are fundamental to a person’s life, such as food or sleep. It’s much better to teach people what addiction looks like and provide them tools to tackle it when it may come, however it may come. So, here’s my recommendation.”

“If you’re going to start a new recreation, one that comes with inherent dangers like recreational drugs? First, tell people. People you trust, don’t keep it a secret. Two, keep a personal log of how often and how much you do it, right from the very beginning. Memory bias is a fickle thing, a journal log will be the quickest and easiest sign that you’re falling into an addictive behavior, both to you and others. Three, especially for your first times, get someone who’s sober involved. Don’t be inebriated by yourself, or only surrounded by other inebriates, and do not pick someone who’s sober that you do not trust… and,” Dr. Mariah said, giving Doppio a serious look, “Don’t make your sober babysitter your partner. Everyone says they understand consent can’t be given while intoxicated, but that becomes harder to internalize when their boyfriend is throwing themselves at you. That’s not how you want to test your relationship early.”

Doppio nodded seriously, mouth set in a soft frown. “I don’t wanna try anything like meth or cocaine. If I was gonna try anything, it’d be something that I could truly only try once. I think…even if it was a good experience for me, it’s still not something I’d really wanna do much? I have enough issues without adding intoxication to ‘em.”

“Oh, and keeping a log would be easy!” he brightened up, flipping up his notebook briefly. “I try to write down everything important ‘cause I can’t remember anyway, and the last time I took uh, like, medicinal drugs I wrote it down…even if I don’t remember them at all and Kaito and the healer I saw got kinda grouchy about it.”

Though, for the other tips Dr. Mariah gave him about trying out his first high… Doppio flushed, looking away as he fussed with his notebook. “I, uh, yeah, I mean… We, uh…got that talk. Does…” He frowned. “...does that happen? …oh, I guess so, since people can get really weird and flirty drunk. Hm.”

Sure, they hadn’t…kissed yet, the last time Arven had taken anything. But he just seemed kinda…normal. Maybe he just wasn’t that flirty while he was high.

Dr. Mariah nodded. “It happens pretty frequently. Most drugs remove inhibitions as their main appeal. It makes you more willing to just try things as they come to mind. That’s why consent is impossible to get while they’re on drugs: it doesn’t occur to the person who’s taken them that there’s a reason to say no. So they rarely do. And even if they do want to say no, it becomes difficult to communicate that.”

“That’s why it’s important to have someone with a clear head around.” Dr. Mariah said, brushing her hair behind her shoulder, “Alright, so… some topics you’d want to go into depth about. The nature of your life, and your fears in connection to that nature. Your relationship with your father. The events connected with Child Protective Services. Your other relationships, including your partner, and including the breaches of trust with Kaito. And, potentially, more advice on how to handle new experiences, including recreational drug use.”

“This is a perfectly decent starting point, though you should know, that by the nature of therapy, we may end up exploring things not specifically on this list. It just depends on how the sessions go,” Dr. Mariah said, “And I treat my sessions like one continuous conversation, whenever it can be helped. We just keep the conversation going, wherever it goes, for as many sessions as it takes, until you’ve felt like there’s nothing more to say about it. I will also give you what I call ‘homework’, which is suggestions on exercises you can try between sessions, to help with whatever you might be currently struggling with.”

“How would you feel about all of that, Doppio?” Dr. Mariah asked. “We could meet once a week for these early sessions, and either increase or decrease meetup time based on how the sessions feel from there.”

That made a lot more sense than people just getting horny from being high. Though he could guess there was maybe some of that too. …but, okay. Good to be aware of. And more reason only to try it the one time--Doppio didn’t need to put Arven in that sort of position, even if he trusted him to be responsible. 

Doppio nodded through Dr. Mariah’s list of Things to Talk About in Therapy (Non-Exhaustive), though he gave her a mildly worried look at one point. “Oh, uh… I guess I should tell you straight up--I have memory issues? So trying to just continue a conversation forever might, uh…get a little repetitive. And frustrating.” He pouted a little. “...I do try to keep track of everything…but I don’t, so. Fair warning.”

“...but other than that?” Doppio chewed on his cheek, weighing it around in his head. “Um…I think that’s…good? Um…Prince Kokichi said I’m not…like, meant to stay in the castle at all times, though I need to go with someone if I go out, uh…” A more worried look crossed over his face. 

“Oh. Um. It’s…very likely my boss sent a hitman after me. A-and because we were together, they might be targeting Arven and…uh…even if you’re not allowed to tell anyone, that… If I’m regularly telling you stuff, that might make you a target too and…um.” He nodded shortly. “That might be a reason you wouldn’t wanna be my therapist.”

“Hmm, memory issues do require a different tactic then. Perhaps I can do recaps at the start of every session then,” Dr. Mariah mused, “We’ll play that one by ear, figure out what works.”

“And, ah. We’ll add in ‘dealing with being a target’ as one of the topics that we should likely discuss. That’s not good for anyone’s mental health,” Dr. Mariah mused, “As for being a target myself? Thank you for the warning, but I am also quite difficult to kill. Not impossible, but I doubt your father has access to the sort of tools that would be required for it. Tell me, is he a particularly pious fellow? Would it be realistic to say that he could be called a warrior, blessed specifically by any particular god?”

Doppio shrugged, looking a bit tired. The gloom surrounding him again. “It’s not unexpected.” It was one of the main reasons he and Arven had run away in the first place…even if he hadn’t told Arven at first. People didn’t just decide to leave Passione. The fact that he was still there, with the most minor interference was…kind of bizarre, honestly. 

…maybe because he wasn’t there to take care of the problem. 

…that didn’t feel great. 

Though he had to snort, giving Dr. Mariah an incredulous look. “No way. Boss…” A confused look crossed over Doppio’s face. “...um…” 

He had meant to say, ‘stuck to more rational means’, but… It was like there was a sticking point in his brain. If…Boss had made him, then…it stood to reason he did know about magic stuff. Which made sense, ‘cause Boss knew everything. But he’d never… So why…

Doppio clenched his eyes shut, holding the bridge of his nose as it felt like his brain was being scrambled, ringing in his ears shutting everything else out.

Dr. Mariah had been just about to end their interview, but… 

“Why don’t you explain what’s on your mind,” Dr. Mariah said softly, “Don’t worry about it being coherent, or rational. Just try to vocalize what’s going through your mind.” 

Doppio made a soft, discontent grumbly noise before taking a steadying breath. Not trying to shift his mind back into order, but…just trying to get his mouth working. “...always was practical? Just…normal, always. But B-b - fuck. If he made me then that’s magic! So…other stuff? …he wasn’t surprised by the water… Is…” 

He cut himself off, gritting his teeth in a pained grimace. …he couldn’t think about it. It was like even trying to…label or…anything like that sent cactus spikes through his brain before he could even mold a concept together. 

Covering his eyes, Doppio let go of a shaky breath and shook his head softly. “...s-sorry… get migraines…”

“That’s quite alright,” Dr. Mariah said, “Do you enjoy tea? It seemed like your migraine might have been a stress migraine, likely from an uncomfortable train of thought. We can do things to mitigate stress during the sessions. While an entirely stress free therapy session is more or less counterintuitive to what therapy is, stress to the point of pain is always something to be avoided. We’ll shape the sessions around you to keep the stress levels low.”

“But, for now? Considering this isn’t a propre session, let’s break here, to allow you to relax until your headache eases.” Dr. Mariah said, “I know that King Aiichi is acting as your temporary guardian. Should I speak to him, confirming you as my new patient? You don’t have to say yes, I can recommend other therapists to interview, who will be able to accommodate for your situation.”

Stress migraines? …oh. Amaina had said… Doppio didn’t think…all his headaches were emotion-based. They seemed too sporadic for that. But, well…he couldn’t say he wasn’t stressed out. …this was bullshit. 

He nodded slightly, confirming his enjoyment of tea, and…he did appreciate that she wanted to make accommodations, and…all that, and…

“...oh…I guess that’s a thing isn’t it…um.” Doppio took a breath, looking up though he kept one palm over an eye, the other squinting at Dr. Mariah. “...I-I think that’d be…good? I…saw the leader this morning but…I dunno where he is now…”

…it felt weird, to get the king’s permission to have a therapist. Doppio was used to just kinda…doing stuff.

“Don’t worry about it, I’ll find him.” Dr. Mariah said. She was mostly seeking out Aiichi because, well, her services didn’t come for free. And she'd rather the castle pay for her time, rather than Doppio. 

“Do you need help getting back to your room?” Dr. Mariah asked him, peering at how he was covering his vision, “Or, perhaps even the medical ward? I’m certain they’d have a painkiller that could ease the symptoms. I could escort you on my way to finding King Aiichi.”

Doppio’s shoulders tensed, more than how they were from pain. “N-no, I’m okay. Don’t need any painkillers. Just…just need a sec. M’used to it…”

“...should put out the fire before I go too. ‘S a safety hazard. N…should clean up the hearth too…” Doppio let out a shaky sigh, replacing his other hand over his open eye. “...in a sec…”

“Don’t be foolish, I’ll ask a housekeeper to take care of it.” Dr. Mariah said, “You really do seem to be struggling. Perhaps I should get–”

Iiiiiiiiiiii’ve got him, I’ve got him, SHUT UP I MUST SING!

Amaina flew from her tiny armchair, up to Doppio’s face. Tapping on his finger, she got his attention, before placing a small little kiss in between his eyes.

La marea saaaaaale

All better, all better

Go away, go away, little pain

All better, all better

Feel better little brain

Or maybe mush? 

Doesn’t matter,

It’s all better, all better.

La marea sale~

A housekeeper? He…supposed that was part of their jobs, like a bunch of people had tried to tell him yesterday, but…he was right there! And he knew how to properly clean a hearth. And it felt a little silly since, well they hadn’t been talking that long, he didn’t think…

A familiar song. A familiar little kiss. A familiar cool, aloe-like sensation, even if it spreading through his head was a little new and novel. With a small sigh of relief, Doppio’s shoulders relaxed and he lowered his hands, giving Amaina a grateful look. “...grazie, angioletto.”

Hmmm… that wasn’t something a chibi should, necessarily, have the power to do.

It could just be a kind of chibi fusion that Dr. Mariah had never seen before. Honestly, the fact that she had been projecting her own image this long and this sustainably with, as far as Dr. Mariah could tell, her anchor nowhere in sight? It was an extremely powerful chibi, beyond anything Dr. Mariah had ever heard of.

…but Dr. Mariah, honestly, didn’t know everything about empaths. Honestly, she couldn’t even claim to know all of the basics. Chibis were one of those well known things in supernatural lore specifically because, well… they were adorable. And even the supernatural community wasn’t above oohing and aahing over just genuinely pleasant displays of magic. For many in the supernatural community, likely the first thing they ever heard about when it came to empaths, was stories of the strange fusion creatures they could, rarely, make. And being able to see one acting in person? Rare and often considered a gift.

So… maybe sometimes Chibis came with healing abilities? Maybe. Dr. Mariah didn’t know. Sorta seemed like it, in the moment.

‘Amaina’ as the chibi was apparently called, sighed dramatically, patting Doppio on the nose, you are sooooo much maintenance stop being in pain it’s silly JUST SAY NO noooo to the migraine. It’s okay I will bully your pain with kisses I am awesome like that.

“Apparently,” Dr. Mariah agreed. “If you are feeling better, Doppio, come along. You can help me locate a housekeeper.”

Laughing softly, Doppio cupped his hands under Amaina, giving her a little seat. “I’ll try that next time, Amaina. But thank you for looking out for me when migraine bullies are too powerful. I’ll try making you those marshmallow pancakes next time as thanks?”

Glancing up at Dr. Mariah, Doppio stood, though he sent a nervous look at the fireplace. However, he just followed with a defeated sigh. “Uh…I kinda only know Waku. I think I did meet other housekeepers, but, uh, I don’t really remember them.”

“...do…you need anything else from me?” He figured she would’ve said so by this point, but…well, better to ask.

“Nope. We’ll start assigning homework after your first real session. How do you feel about meeting Monday?” Dr. Mariah asked, “I’m not sure which school track you’re in, but we can schedule it for the morning or afternoon, as needed.”

Doppio blinked, giving Dr. Mariah a mildly surprised look before he shrugged. “I’m not in school. And I…” he grimaced, “...just…quit my job. So I’m…kind of free whenever. Um…Monday morning would be good, if that works for you?”

She nodded. “That will work. I’m looking forward to seeing you again, Doppio. I’m certain I can help you through this development.”

O.O

O.O

OoO OKAY BUT WHY DO YOU LOOK LIKE YOU’RE TWELVE??

“Why are you a foot tall?” Dr. Mariah asked.

It is just who I aaaaaaaaam~

“There you go.” Dr. Mariah said, “It’s as simple as that.”

-

They did end up finding a housekeeper, even if Doppio stalled, trying to remember exactly which room they had left. Thankfully, Dr. Mariah had no problem, and Doppio could rest easy knowing that he hadn’t contributed to burning Usott Castle down. After that they parted ways, Dr. Mariah tracking down the king, and Doppio heading back to his room. Migraine gone, he didn’t feel like he needed to curl up in a corner somewhere, but…well, he had a boyfriend he wanted to spend time with. 

Knocking gently on their door, Doppio entered with a small smile. “I’m back.”

Arven had gotten busy, and now on top of the dresser was, strung up on stacked sticks, bundles of herbs that Arven had collected while they were out in the hills. Strung up were various greeneries, and the room was smelling pleasantly of drying herbs, rosemary and mint being the clearest of the otherwise ‘naturey’ scents.

Glancing over to the door, Arven smiled. “Hey~ how did it go? Are we rebelling against therapists next?”

“Oh!” Doppio reflexively took a deep breath, the herby, naturey scent of the room automatically lifting his mood…as if Arven himself didn’t already. It was never anything that Doppio had done at home, but…’home’ was exactly what the room now smelled like. Even the sunlight through the window seemed brighter. 

Going over to look at the drying herbs, Doppio offered Arven a sheepish smile. “Not yet, no. She’s pretty cool, actually… Um, we’re gonna start sessions on Monday. I could, uh, walk you and Chief to school and then head to her office, with the time we planned so, um. If you wanted that.”

“...is this everything we picked up? It’s a lot more than I thought…” Though it was clear from Doppio’s tone that that was far from a problem.

“Mmhm,” Arven said, finishing tying up the last of the rosemary, before stepping back, giving his setup a final look over before reaching over to hug Doppio. “Never looks like that much in comparison to where we pick it, but then you hang it up and it’s like, huh, these really are more than handfuls.”

“And you’re gonna walk me to school?” Arven asked, smiling, placing a small little kiss against Doppio, “That’s a fun start to the day. So, you decided to go with her. Did you… tell her about your ‘thing’?”

Doppio looked moderately surprised by the hug, but only grinned wider as he returned it, pressing his cheek to Arven’s affectionately. Aw… That was a nice way to be…welcomed home, he supposed. Doppio would certainly take it. 

As would walking Arven to school. Doppio had no interest in going himself, but…it would be nice to have that sort of routine. Building things back up for himself. And it could be fun to plan things to do if Arven felt like ditching. 

“I did,” Doppio nodded, before smiling awkwardly. “A-a lot of my things, actually, and, uh, she showed me her’s so…felt kinda tit-for-tat, and all. Um…”

Shifting his weight, Doppio considered…saying anything? Dr. Mariah hadn’t actually told him not to say anything, just that it would be inconvenient if certain people found out, but…Arven knew about all the other magic bullshit! And Doppio trusted him to keep those secrets. So…

While he did feel safe in their room, Doppio still lowered his voice, leaning in to whisper in Arven’s ear. “My therapist can breathe fire.”

Arven’s eyes widened. “That’s so cool.”

“But, wait, what does that mean?” Arven frowned, just sounding curious about it. “Like, what breaths fire… d…” Arven suddenly looked wondrous, “Dragons? Or, maybe a phoenix? I mean, neither of those look human, but maybe the human thing is an illusion? Weird to pick one that makes her look Timothy’s age, but still, do you think? What other supernatural creatures breathe fire… oh? Oh, there’s these creatures called ‘elementals’ I’ve read about before, though, they’re supposed to be fire… that’s so cool.”

Doppio eagerly nodded, his eyes similarly wide. It had been incredibly cool. 

“I, uh, didn’t ask. It seemed rude,” Doppio sheepishly admitted. “Like, um, Amaina told Nell she was being rude when she asked what I was, and you saw how Maki was. I think it might be a more sensitive subject? Or something? And, uh…”

He blew air into his bangs. “Well, it wasn’t straight up fire. I think, uh…she can spit some sort of flammable liquid? And then she said the texture of her skin was specialized for igniting it…but she did blow on it and make a firestream, which was super cool. She said that was kinda rare? Which I thought was a bummer… Seems like particularly helpful physiology, right?”

Doppio tilted his head, eyes unfocusing a little. “...if an elemental is fire…would they just look like a flame…or?”

“I think so, yeah. That’s what the legends make it sound like,” Arven said, looking curiously at Doppio. “You know… we don’t actually know what you are specifically, right? Like, the name? So… we don’t know what you can or can’t do.”

Glancing over at their own fireplace, Arven asked, “You saw how she did it. Do you want to try it?”

Doppio raised an eyebrow, following Arven’s gaze to the fireplace. “...I’m pretty sure my spit isn’t flammable, though. And I’ve definitely gotten, like, gasoline on my hands and didn’t have an issue with my skin igniting it. …I could try, though.”

Heading over to the fireplace, Doppio moved the safety grate and knelt down in front of the recess, after a moment of contemplation moving a single piece of starter wood into it. They didn’t need a full fire if it worked, after all. Looking at his hands a moment, he sent Arven a mildly grossed out look. “...sorry in advance.”

And, sighing to himself, Doppio stuck a finger in his mouth and… Well, it sounded like she was…gurgling up something deep…

“Hhhhrk…ggggggrk…” Doppio gargled around his finger, face drawn in focus. 

Arven’s nose wrinkled a little, though he still watched with fascination. Truthfully, it looked like Doppio was trying to make himself vomit. Though… “So, she gargled something out of her throat? Or, more likely her stomach-lining. I wonder if there’s something in her throat that can act as an igniter. But, if there was, why did she need to spit onto her fingers first? Maybe it’s wrong to say she’s something that ‘breathes’ fire, maybe she’s taking advantage of a physiological trick that her body wasn’t pre-built for?”

“‘I shou’g’e e’a--” Doppio wrinkled his nose and pulled his finger out, unconvinced, but trying to snap his fingers anyway. “It sounded different when she did it. Like a growl, almost.”

…he really was just snapping a drool-covered hand. 

“...bleh. I’m gonna wash this off. But, uh…” Weakly, Doppio gave Arven a small shrug. “...I have no idea. It probably is wrong to say she breathes fire, but…that’s the easiest way to describe what I saw her do, I guess.” He sighed, something a little defeated in his eyes. “I think, looking at my own biology, we can tell it isn’t one of my strong suits.”

“Ah well. You’re not a dragon and probably not a phoenix and, I’m going to guess, not an elemental.” Arven grinned, rubbing Doppio’s back a bit, before letting him head off to the bathroom. “But that’s alright. Honestly, it’s kind of fun, trying to theorize about it. You’re exciting, Aceto. I’m looking forward to learning more about you as you do.”

Doppio returned from the bathroom, hands clean and flushed, though he could only give Arven a sheepish look. “...mostly I’m just hoping I don’t puke out any more gears. I don’t even remember it, really. Just…that I couldn’t breathe and my body just felt…wrong.”

He sighed, sitting back down beside Arven. “...there’s been too much of that lately.” Doppio shook his head with a deeper sigh before flopping back on the ground and looking up at Arven. He looked nice with sunlight illuminating behind him… “...how are you doing? Is your foot alright?”

“It’s fine, when I woke up this morning a lot of the pain had subsided already. So long as I don’t put too much pressure on it, I barely feel it,” Arven said, shuffling back to his backpack, pulling out a few jars full of herbs, “You mind if I display this on the dresser too? Figured if I’m here for a week I’d unpack these things a little more.”

“That’s good,” Doppio hummed with a smile, actually pretty comfortable on the floor…especially with such a good view above him. “I know you can handle yourself but…your balance can get really fucked, if you lose toes. Even if it means dealing with a uh…cast? Brace. Thing, for a bit…I’m glad you’re getting help. And that it feels better today.”

Shaking his head and waving Arven to go ahead and display the herbs, Doppio suddenly laughed softly. “Here for a week so time to unpack… You’ve already made this room feel so homey and nice. I know I don’t remember them well, but I remember being in places for, like…multiple weeks, but still living out of suitcases ‘cause…well, we’d just leave soon, so what was the point?”

Doppio looked around their room with a soft smile. “...I think I like your way better.”

Arven put the jars up one by one, looking proudly at them. “I understand the mentality, but as someone who also traveled around for a year by backpack? After a while you just sort of yearn to be able to put things up and display them and make things… comfy, I guess. Even if it’s temporary, I can’t help but want to spread out and settle a little. That’s been the nicest thing about being home again, really. At least in my room and the kitchen? Where it’s just my own things? I can make everything just… exactly how I like it.”

“That said, this is your space too. So, how I’d like it is how you’d like it,” Arven said, shuffling back over to Doppio, sitting down beside him so that he could see what the dresser looked like from where Doppio was sitting. Nice. “Why not, it’s our room for a week. Feel free to put up whatever. I’d like little signs of you too.”

“What about your chest?” Arven asked, nudging Doppio a little, “How’s that been feeling?”

And exactly how he liked it was very comfy, in Doppio’s opinion. He didn’t really think he had an eye for aesthetics for…anything, outside of a plate of food, but if he could choose any sort of vibe to stay in? He’d pick Arven’s, absolutely. 

“...I’d collect cool rocks and leaves, sometimes,” Doppio hummed. “To make a space my own. Other than my clothes, I guess, I don’t really have much… I could put my cookbook somewhere, but I feel like I’d forget about it and then get all put out when I wanted to try cooking something… And I’ve learned it’s a bad idea to put my notebook anywhere but right around me. …I’ll think of something.”

Tilting his head to better look at Arven, Doppio propped his arm up and rested it against Arven’s back, just…wanting to have contact. “It’s been okay--haven’t been coughing or out of breath or anything. Just a little sore from yesterday, if I had to say anything… Got a migraine, though… Amaina healed it. Mariah said it was probably a stress migraine which…kinda tracks, along with everything we were talking about yesterday.”

Doppio traced some of the seam lines of Arven’s vest. “...can I kiss you?”

“Rocks are cool. Always love a good rock collection.” Arven grinned, gently running his fingertips through the side of Doppio’s hair. “And I’m sorry you got a migraine… Luckily we’ve got our little guardian angel. Who, I’m guessing, has made herself sparse because of ‘couple thoughts’.”

“Yeah?” Arven grinned, leaning in. “You can kiss me… I’ve been kinda wanting to kiss you since you left.”

Doppio smirked slightly. “You know, I always forget how much tact she can actually have, if that’s the case.” …he wasn’t sure if healing him took much out of her. The first time was something super small, so he didn’t think it was that representative, but…after healing his arm? They’d both gone to sleep. But…Doppio wasn’t sure if she’d just done that ‘cause he was sleeping. Well…he’d hope she’d tell him if it was getting to be more than she could give. 

Sitting himself back up, meeting Arven, Doppio murmured, “Been wanting to kiss you since we woke up,” before closing the space entirely, meeting his lips to Arven’s. Bringing a hand up to cup Arven’s cheek, while his other remained around Arven’s back. The little thrill of affection just as powerfully running through his gut as it had the first time they kissed. 

Arven wrapped his arms around Doppio’s back, and he couldn’t help but ecstatically smile into the kiss, which he was going to guess actually made him somewhat difficult to kiss? He couldn’t help it. Doppio just made him giggly and happy.

Doppio’s hair brushed against Arven’s arms, and Arven suddenly decided he liked that. Reaching up, he thumbed Doppio’s braid a little, feeling the smooth, almost silky bindings. “I really like your hair,” Arven admitted between kisses, “Both when it’s braided up and when it’s spread out… It's really pretty. You’re really pretty.”

Feeling Arven smile against him was a new sort of sensation, but it was one that Doppio couldn’t help but giggle at, breaking their kiss into smaller ones but…well, Doppio was a fan of those too. Just…everything with Arven was good. 

Flushing a bit at the compliment, Doppio self-consciously tucked his bangs behind his ear, knowing that it was only a matter of--oh. Already back down. “Thanks… I uh…um…” He’d chickened out of saying it last time, but with another peck for courage, Doppio asked, “Could…I braid your hair sometime? I-I mean, I really like it how you normally wear it, and, uh…it’s kind of an excuse for me, since your hair is super soft, like, wow, but…”

Another kiss to cut himself off. “You’re really pretty too. Everything about you.”

Doppio could feel a flutter of nerves and excitement in his stomach as his blush ramped up. “...when I saw you shirtless for the first time, I, like, really wanted to kiss your stomach.”

Arven grinned, but he had to keep himself from reaching up to push his bangs in front of his eye a bit. He supposed if… maybe he only wore the braids in the room… “Sure, I wouldn’t mind that. It’d be fun to see what you did with it.”

Though, what Doppio said next??

Holy shit, it was like being punched in the stomach. In his, apparently, very kissable stomach!? Ah?? Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh????

Arven’s face was on fire, suddenly all the cool suave he had been managing as they kissed out the window as he struggled to respond, looking down at the ground. He felt so warm that it was like steam was coming out of his ears. Maybe steam was literally coming out of his ears?? Maybe that was that ringing sound… oh, nope, that was him going ‘eeeeeeeee’ again. Damn.

“Ah, eh, ah, w-well…” Arven was bluescreening. He had no idea how to respond. “...gheh? Hrmgh. Mhm. Yep. Well. You… could! I-if you wanted to, I… th-that’d be…” Arven grinned wobbly, “New feeling.”

That’d be really nice… Doppio had never really done…styling, he guessed, for anyone else, but, well, he knew how to make a mean braid. He really did like Arven’s look, but…it could be nice, seeing a little more of his face. (....freeing up. Neck space. For reasons.)

As Arven imploded, Doppio only grew redder himself, his heart beating faster. His hand gently fisting in the back of Arven’s vest as he looked down, embarrassed but…something. Something keeping him from taking the words back. 

Rubbing his face, flustered, Doppio shrugged with a flustered grin. “I-I mean…i-it’s just…thoughts. Cause I really like you, a-and I think you’re really attractive and…um. I don’t… I-I never wanna push you past what you're comfortable with!” Doppio suddenly said louder, a bit more insistence in his tone as he looked back up, meeting Arven’s eye. “I-I just like kissing, like we have been! I just…think you’re attractive. And…”

Ahg, it was too much. Doppio glanced away again. “...I thought you should know. ‘Cause you’re hot.”

“Ah… thanks? Thanks! Uh…” Arven flushed, staring at his feet. “I don’t, um… I like the… idea. The idea is, um…” Arven was gonna fucking explode, “...exciting. That’s exciting. It’s, uh, an exciting idea.”

He felt like he should say something sexy back– because that’s what just happened, right? Doppio had said something sexy?? Holy shit– but he was still pretty heavily blue-screening, trying to think of something sexy. “...I want to… lick you?”

AHHHHHHHHHHHH WHY HAD HE SAID THAT THAT WASN’T SEXY THAT WAS JUST BEING GROSS THAT’S WHAT ELEMENTARY SCHOOL KIDS DID TO GROSS EACH OTHER OUT AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Exciting? Was Arven…

Doppio tried to imagine…actually doing it. Arven with his shirt off…o-or even with it just unbuttoned and…well it’d be kind of uncomfortable so…maybe they were lying down and…Doppio was kinda…kneeling over him or something. And he’d…

Doppio swallowed heavily, feeling…tight and electric. But, uh…certainly not in his chest. He blinked, a little dazed up at Arven. “...h-how? Um… I mean I… How’d…you want to lick me?”

Arven flushed.

Oh shit, uh, how???

“Um…” Arven looked over Doppio, leaning back to get a better view. His boyfriend looked… so cute. Peeking at him with those golden eyes, somehow both looking shy and absolutely forward. Wow, Arven was in it now. “Um… I guess… the first thing I’d try, would be, uh…”

Putting his index and middle finger together, Arven placed his fingers on Doppio’s neck, before tracing down a line around and down his collarbone, to his upper chest. “I guess I’d start there, and, uh, maybe go here?”

“And, uh…” Arven really had no idea how far he was willing to go, really. But tracing his fingers? He held his breath a little, his heart starting to thump, as he traced his fingers down Doppio’s chest. “Maybe… maybe here…”

His breath caught in his throat, as he felt a small bump beneath his fingertips. Something small and pointy. “...um… m… maybe here?” Arven whispered breathlessly. Not daring to move his fingers much more. Just… pointing. Feeling the small bump beneath his fingers.

Doppio’s eyes were fixed on Arven, like he was the only thing worth seeing in the world. And right then? It kinda felt that way. Flushed and nervous, those lovely, delicate eyelashes flowing with every blink. Doppio had meant it--Arven was breathtaking, but he didn’t want to push his boyfriend further than he wanted to go, make all those nerves bad nerves and--

Doppio gasped softly, eyes widening as Arven traced fingers along his skin. It almost felt like they were leaving a trail of goosebumps in their wake, even as Arven traced over his shirt. He, uh…hoo, he hadn’t thought… L-licking was just kinda! Vague! And Arven had just laughed when Doppio had licked his finger before! So he was curious! 

Not expecting Arven to outline just…exactly what he’d do…

Doppio’s breath hitched as a spark did go through his chest, a shiver going through his spine under Arven’s touch. Suddenly feeling very aware of the spot Arven was touching, almost feeling, like…sensitive or something and… oh. 

Oh. Uh.

…he was suddenly aware of where that shiver was going. 

“...Arven?” Doppio whispered, voice shaking a little from nerves and…something else. “...I need to use the bathroom.” …leaning back as he was, even in jeans it…wasn’t hiding much. 

“Oh,” Arven said, “Okay… you uh…” Arven glanced down, though briefly, he hadn’t needed to look to know what was happening. “You can. Go, I mean.”

“...” Arven, after a second, pulled his fingers back. Not wanting to keep, uh, touching where he was touching, if Doppio needed to… go. “...”

“...but you don’t have to,” Arven said quietly. His voice tight, almost a squeak, though he cleared his throat to say clearer, “If you don’t want to.”

Heavily flushed, Doppio…kept swallowing. What was that about, was he…w-well he wasn’t actually drooling, but if felt like he would be without the swallows! It was like a tingle in the back of his jaw, like he’d just cooked a perfect meal…

Doppio tried to sit up more, as Arven pulled back (...not chasing the touch, n-no, even if it, uh…was missed) but he just…kind of shifted on the ground. Legs feeling awkward and, uh…everything feeling a little too uncomfortable…down there. Just…

He gave Arven a nervous, shy look. “...I don’t wanna rush you. I-into anything, not just, um… I…I really liked what we did before, but that doesn’t… I mean… …you look kinda scared.”

“I-I’m not scared, I just…” Arven shrugged, “It’s a lot, isn’t it? It’s, you know… it’s not like I’ve… touched very many people. At all. Even casually…”

“It makes me nervous,” Arven admitted, “But I’m not scared. If a-anything, I’m worried I’m coming on too strong. I mean I…” Arven leaned in and whispered, “Touched your nipple, Aceto. That’s… am I rushing you into anything?”

Doppio nodded a bit. It was a lot. And even with Arven it felt like a lot. But…that was kind of the other side of it too--to him? Things just…felt better with Arven. And as nervous as Doppio was for some things…there was a lot of excitement with it too. 

“I’ve usually spent my time trying to avoid being touched by anyone,” Doppio softly admitted, before he gave Arven a lopsided smile and, briefly, kissed his cheek. “...maybe? But…I, uh…”

THIS SOUNDED EASIER IN HIS HEAD AAAA

Flushing bright, Doppio closed his eyes and admitted, “I liked it? I-I don’t think I could handle you, a-actually licking me there, but…talking about it and…touching above my clothes and with your hand, I…” He let out a nervous laugh, squinting his eyes open to give Arven a desperate look. “...I-I got really turned on. A-and that feels good to me. I just…don’t wanna do anything that doesn’t feel good to you, or that you’re not sure about and you’re just doin’ it ‘cause it feels good to me…you know?!”

“Just…trust me that I’ll tell you if I don’t want something? I, uh…” He tried for a grin, but ended up somewhere closer to a grimace. “...I know I seem kinda…pathetic ‘n stuff, but…I know how to stand up for myself. If you’re rushing me…I-I’ll tell you to slow down. Or stop.”

Arven barked out a laugh at the end there, what Doppio said so confusing to him that it chased away some of his nerves as he gave his boyfriend a baffled look. “Pathetic? Since when have you ever been pathetic? I can’t even imagine someone looking at you and thinking you were ever pathetic for a second.”

“I liked it too…” Arven murmured, looking down at Doppio. He just… wasn’t sure what to do next. Were they doing that again? Doppio was, uh… really hard. And, honestly, Arven wasn’t that far behind him. That stomach comment had brutalized him, and the semi it had inspired hadn’t exactly gone anywhere. “Um…”

Doppio had gotten really hard when Arven had touched his nipple. Reaching out, Arven hesitated a second… before placing his palm on Doppio’s chest. Rubbing his thumb around the hard edges of Doppio’s nipple. “Does… does that feel like anything?”

Doppio jolted, looking at Arven with wide eyes. …it was…obvious, wasn’t it? How people called him small and acted like he needed constant protection, and how he’d just…crumble and constantly be taken advantage of by others… He’d regularly been called so, so…

…Arven thought it was ludicrous that someone could think he was pathetic…

Blinking, letting out a little breath at the returned warmth of Arven’s hand on his chest, Doppio…snorted softly, giving Arven an embarrassed grin. “...like you’re rubbing your thumb on my chest? Um…” 

Closing his eyes and stewing in embarrassment, Doppio let out a huff. “...if we’re gonna…d-do anything? Can we get off the floor? …a-and can I…um…” Just say it, man, he’ll tell you no if it’s not okay, “...c-can I unbutton my pants?”

Arven laughed, though there was some embarrassment in it. “Ah, geez, nothing? Alright, so not quite that.”

“....” Arven burned red again. “...s-sure? Sure. You can. Um… should I?”

But as he asked that question, he stood up, offering Doppio a hand up too, mostly because he wanted to keep touching him. He looked to the beds, before nodding towards them. “?”

Doppio’s eyes unfocused a little before, against any input from him, they darted to Arven’s pants. …they’d just…had pajama pants before… Just underwear would…

Another swallow. 

“I-If you want, yes? Yes. I-I think…yes. If you want to.” Taking Arven’s hand, Doppio stood, a sort of cringe going through his face before it all relaxed with a forceful sigh, his free hand clenching and unclenching at his side. And with a nervous, yet purposeful step, Doppio went towards the beds, giving Arven’s hand a squeeze. 

At the edge, Doppio hesitated, before kissing Arven. Brief pecks, once twice…before hands with only the occasional tremor reached for his waistband. 

Arven did, admittedly, sort of feel like he was playing keep up with Doppio. But it was a fun sort of game, sitting with him and kissing him back in those same chaste, sweet kisses, before he noticed Doppio get distracted. Looking down at himself.

Arven stared at what Doppio was doing for a minute, before realizing maybe that wasn’t something he should do, and so he stared somewhere in Doppio’s chest area, just trying not to… stare. His hands felt clumsy and awkward, but it suddenly occurred to him he should do the same, reaching down to unbutton his pants, before hesitating.

“...are we…” Arven swallowed, still refusing to look down, “...uh… p-pulling them out?”

Before he could overthink it, Doppio popped open his button and pulled down his fly, gasping a bit as his suddenly very demanding dick had…well, at least a little more room. Not much. But enough that it didn’t feel like…

“...I-I don’t know,” Doppio said quietly, voice a bit overwhelmed. “I just…I-it felt like I was gonna die if I didn’t…” He swallowed, looking everywhere but the bit of light blue cotton he could see coming out of his open fly. “Do…you want to, um…like we did before? I-I really can just…go to the bathroom and…”

He breathed heavily. “...can I kiss your neck?”

Arven was now vaguely worried he had made a mistake, as he unzipped his own fly but heard Doppio’s answer. He was… wearing boxers. His boxers had a hole in the front. It, uh… it wasn’t like Doppio’s. Things could… slip.

Arven suddenly tried to think cooling thoughts. But that attempt to keep his dick under control in this nebulous predicament he had just put it in were dashed at Doppio’s question. “Yes?” Arven asked, before saying. “Yes. I-I’d like that, you can do that. Um… do you need me too…?”

Arven suddenly brought his hands up, fussing with his hair. Trying to brush it back and away from his neck, though damn, his curls were fighting him. He eventually just pushed all of his hair to his other shoulder, sort of wringing his hands through it fitfully to try to keep it there, as he said, “Uh, go ahead…”

Doppio looked at Arven with a wide, heated, nervous gaze…before he turned, shifting to, uh, partially sit on one knee, while his other leg was still off the bed. Using the leverage to lean in and…well. Peck Arven normally once, giving him a small smile. 

Before he leaned in more, breathing in that so…earthly…cozy Arven scent as he just barely butterflied his lips under Arven’s jaw, bringing up a hand to weave through Arven’s hair as well, meeting his hands. He remembered just…how good it felt when Arven had kissed his neck before, and…wanting to do something like that for Arven in return? (Though it wasn’t entirely altruistic) Doppio started pressing firmer kisses farther down his boyfriend’s neck, leaning his body closer towards him.

Ooooooh shit, that was a strange feeling.

Arven gasped a little, and briefly he had to stop his shoulders from moving up. He wasn’t trying to keep access from his neck, his body just jolted in surprise, Arven unsure how to physically… be. At this moment. But a shuddering through his spine relaxed his shoulders a little, and Arven gasped a little as he tilted his head to the side, making an effort to give Doppio access to more of him. Doppio’s hands through his hair on the other side of his shoulders felt… all encompassing. Like there was nowhere to go but into Doppio, either against his lips or against his hands, back and forth all leading to the same place.

“Ah… sh… shit. Um…” Arven swallowed, closing his eyes, feeling the warmth spreading through him as Doppio kissed from spot to spot. “Um… I uh… d-do you want to try that… um…” Arven flushed, embarrassed he was even asking, “...thing you said? Before?”

Doppio paused as he felt Arven tense. Even if Arven had said it was just…nerves? And that he did want this? …he hated to give Kaito and Lake credit for anything, but…he wanted to be attentive. To not just get one yes and assume it was for everything, and just barrel on ahead. 

…he didn’t want to leave them with regrets. 

But as Arven tilted his head more, Doppio continued with the kisses, the feeling of soft skin against his lips a little weird, but good weird, and…i-it was weird, it was almost a little…salty? Or something. Even with his mouth closed he could…

Doppio huffed, his dick aching, and… “...do you wanna sit on me this time? Or want me on top of you again? Or, um…” He flushed, hiding his face against Arven’s neck. “...we could lie down? I…nm. I-I really liked having your leg between mine, before…”

There was something appealing in all of those options, though Arven could admit, “I-I’d be up to being on top, but I’m kind of heavy… I don’t want to hurt your chest. Do you think lying down would be easier on you?” Arven asked, genuinely worried about it. Doppio had already hurt himself carrying Arven once, after all…

“And, um, you’re gonna need to remind me what position our legs were in…” Arven suddenly grinned, laughing a little, as he admitted, “That whole night feels like a blur. I was just kind of… doing things, you know? I can barely remember thinking about it, let alone where our legs were.”

Really none of the positions seemed like they’d be much strain on him--it wasn’t like he was going to be lifting Arven over his head or anything--but…Arven lying on top of him… Like, fully on top of him… Doppio’s eyes grew a little hazy as his dick throbbed, his hips shifting a little to try and accommodate. 

“...I’d like you on top of me with, um, us lying down…if that’s alright,” Doppio said breathily…before he flushed, pulling away a little to…well, scoot back on the bed so he could lie down. Red and embarrassed as he stammered, “I-I don’t think it was purposeful o-or anything, I just…”

Even redder. “...it felt really good. I…” He had to cover his face with a hand. “...I had to jerk off in the shower ‘cause I got hard again.”

Soon enough, Doppio realized a…different problem. It was still far too embarrassing to look down, but, uh… “...um…is it too much if I…changed pants first?”

Kind of, yes, because Arven was going to explode, watching Doppio lay back, red face and flushing and talking about how good he felt and how he wanted Arven on top of him… “O-of course you can,” Arven forced himself to say, when really what he wanted to do was crawl on top of Doppio and kiss him more and maybe– “Sure, whatever you need. I-I should maybe change my underwear. Uh… this one has a hole. Things might… poke out.”

Doppio paused, mind processing. Freckles blending into his blush as his lips parted slightly before he…well. Looked up at Arven with an expression that could only be described as ‘needy’. “...if you don’t look down, could I just take my pants off?”

…he wouldn’t mind if things just…ahem. 

“...if I don’t look down?” Arven said, wondering how in the hell he was going to manage that.

But no part of him could say no, especially not with that look on Doppio’s face. Because if he said no, then maybe he… wouldn’t get to feel more of Doppio. L-like… his legs… “Can I take mine off too?” Arven asked. “If I don’t look down?”

Oh shit oh fuck he hadn’t even considered that aaaaaaaaaaaaa

“Yeah,” Doppio said quickly, almost breathing the word out. Feeling his heart beat heavy and fast before, almost carelessly in their haste, he reached for his waistband again and started wiggling his hips back out of his pants, fighting the urge to just close his thighs around his hands and go at it, fuck, fuck he was so hard--

“...A-arven,” Doppio near whimpered, skinny jeans pooled at his ankles as he tried to kick them off. “I feel like I’m gonna cum in a second.”

Once again, playing catch up. Though Doppio’s fervor was hard not to get caught up in, as Arven grabbed at his own pants, quickly pulling them down– oh, whoops, no, bring that part back up– before kicking them off, feeling… so exposed. Still wearing his underwear, but absolutely lewd in how it tented, as Arven fitfully readjusted the fabric. Stay away from the hole, just, stay in there!

Arven looked at the skinny jeans at Doppio’s ankles, before glancing at his– nope nope nope Doppio said don’t look. Sending his gaze hurtling upwards, Arven stared pointedly at the ceiling, having just briefly caught sight of Doppio’s olive skin, still peppered with freckles even, uh, there, between his legs, his thighs rubbing together as he tried to kick his jeans off.

Arven reached out and, almost blindly, grabbed the jeans at Doppio’s ankles. “...can, uh…” Arven swallowed, still staring upwards, “...it’s alright if this is too much. But have you ever heard of, um… people fucking each other’s thighs before? U-uh, cause… one of my friends used to pass around these magazines and… I saw that. Once. Th-thought it looked weird, but, uh…think I get it, now…”

“Hhuuuh~” A shaky, breathy sound came out of Doppio’s mouth as Arven grabbed his jeans, pretty much…pinning his ankles down since they were still a little stuck, and Doppio promptly slapped a hand over his mouth. Would’ve looked absolutely mortified, if not for, uh…how caught in pleasure he looked, his other hand stuffed between his legs as he trembled. 

And, shakily, Doppio lifted the bottom of his hand--on his mouth--breathing heavily. Shaking his head a little, but gaze entranced by Arven. “N-No, I haven’t, I… W-we can try? U-um… Arven? P-please get on me.”

“O-okay! Okay, uh, coming,” Arven said, and whatever nerves he still had were replaced by his absolute want in this moment. Encouraging Doppio to put his entwined legs against his shoulder, Arven tried to figure out the next move…

…ahhhhhh he couldn’t do this and keep his underwear closed like this. But whipping out his dick was way too bold a move, he just couldn’t, he’d die. Just melt in a puddle of embarrassment. He had asked for it, but in truth, even just doing that was Arven trying to take a bigger bite of this than he could really handle right now.

It felt awkward and embarrassing, but Arven made a sort of hapless attempt to kinda… bump? His dick into Doppio’s backside. And when that didn’t work– he wasn’t even really sure what he had been hoping to happen– he sputtered, “Actually, I, um, l-let’s just, fuck, let’s just take your jeans off and open your legs, and I can… we c-can just rub again, cause I… I don’t know how to do the other thing without taking my dick out. Um, hold on.”

Taking the ends of Doppio’s jeans, he finangled them off Doppio’s ankles, before tossing them aside, grabbing an ankle to try to help Doppio move it around Arven and– don’t look down why are you looking down there’s nothing to see!

Arven fixated on Doppio’s face, which, fuck, that look had to be illegal. Doppio’s face was flushed pink, his gaze fuzzy and longing, his lips pouting out in little pants as he waited for Arven to get his shit together. He looked so pretty, a-and kind of cute, a-and Arven wanted to kiss him. 

So he scurried forward, Doppio’s legs now on either side of his hips, Arven sort of using his elbows to hover over Doppio now. He wondered what he looked like right now? He felt like he must look desperate. He kind of was, as he felt Doppio’s hips sort of stop his scurrying forward because, uh, there was nowhere else to go but… just further flushed against Doppio. “...I-I’m gonna start now, okay?” Arven whispered.

Whatever Doppio could’ve guessed thigh fucking looked like--not that he was really imagining much, in the stage where need was just his pure emotion not leaving room for creative exercises--it…wasn’t for Arven to bring his legs straight up in the air. Eyebrows raised, uh… Well as…nice as it was to kinda…feel Arven all down the backs of his legs, it was kinda…

…underwhelming. And even feeling the bulge of Arven’s erection just sorta…inspired a small rush of embarrassment. 

So, uh, he was a little thankful when Arven abandoned the idea before Doppio could even open his mouth and…once he got his pants off properly, and Arven laid down? …it was a lot nicer being able to see Arven’s face this way too. Doppio couldn’t help but grin as he pulled near, his lashes casting shadows over his cheeks, pink just as much as Doppio could guess his own were, and that mix of nerves and excitement…

Doppio couldn’t help the small, delighted laugh that left him as he shifted under Arven, reaching up to cup his jaw, a thrill of pure attraction running down his spine as he whispered, “Bello… il mondo sotto le mie mani per te.” Nodding, before he shifted more, grabbing at Arven’s waist to shift him too, threading their legs so they both had a thigh between before Doppio rolled his hips up, pressing forward to lock his lips with Arven’s.

Arven grinned, Doppio’s laughter relaxing the last of his nerves. It was easy to follow where Doppio’s hands led him, adjusting where Doppio wanted him, and once he started to roll his hips? It was the same as last time, that breathless, mindless feeling. Like Arven wasn’t so much thinking with his mind, but entirely with his body, as he at first steadily, then urgently, rolled into Doppio.

He felt breathless as he kissed Doppio back. Literally breathless, he may have forgotten to breathe at a certain point, because when he broke the kiss he was actually gasping, trying to get in a clear bit of air before leaning down against to kiss, moving his head at a different angle to better lock himself against Doppio. 

He felt primal. As he lowered himself down more, flushing out his chest with Doppio’s, then pressing his stomach against him too, practically laid out on top of him as he used his knees to propel him backwards and forwards, he felt strong. He grasped the blanket beneath his hands, closing his eyes and focusing on the sensation of jutting up and down Doppio’s body. His own nipples felt good, pressed against Doppio. He liked the way Doppio’s body moved beneath his own. He liked the way Doppio sounded, panting into his ear when Arven couldn’t keep up the kissing without knocking his face sort of uncomfortably against Doppio’s, so he pressed his face into Doppio’s neck instead. Listening to that panting.

“You feel so good… Aceto, you feel so good,” Arven whispered into his neck, keeping his eyes closed.

And then, at a certain point, Arven’s dick, uh… just… stopped feeling resistance. The head of it no longer bumping and brushing against his drawers. And Arven suddenly started rutting so hard against Doppio that the bed started to shake, the backboards hitting the wall. “Oh, fuck,” Arven said, wrapping his arms around Doppio’s waist, trying desperately to push their hips even closer together.

It felt good. Fuck it felt good. The pressure of Arven’s whole damn body pressing Doppio down, the mattress beneath him barely feeling like a real thing at all. All Doppio could focus on was Arven’s leg between his, and the hard press of his cock against one of his thighs. Doppio’s hands grasping at Arven’s vest, his waist, his shoulders, his cheek--anywhere he could touch and press them closer together. 

It was…kinda weird. Kinda funny. Doppio…pretty much never masturbated on his back, the sensation of pressing up into something completely foreign, and yet? Doppio couldn’t stop his hips from jerking up, even after he’d cum once. The hyper-sensation just making him pant harder and groan and growl as he tried to pull Arven closer. 

To kiss more. To press harder. To…

“Arven…” Doppio growled as he felt something…wet. And warm. And…and not cloth start rubbing against his upper thigh. And as Arven started rutting harder, faster, Doppio slightly bent his leg, gasping at all the new angles and points of pressure now unlocked. Rolling his hips furiously against Arven’s, even as the mattress squeaked and the bed banged against the wall, panting and whining in his boyfriend’s ear. Fingers digging into his back, even through the vest. 

“Just like that, just like that,” Arven encouraged, grasping hard at Doppio’s waist. In truth, a real part of him couldn’t think about Doppio’s pleasure in that moment. He was so close to cumming, and he needed it to happen, rutting into him as he gasped and panted loudly into Doppio’s neck, “Oh, oh! I’m gonna cum, I’m gonna cum!”

It wasn’t really a warning. It was just literally the only thought on his mind, as he felt the warmth of Doppio’s skin against his legs, his body solid in his arms, that ever present, ever pressing smell of sunshine– “Hah! H-AAAH! A-ah… ah…hah…”

Arven slowed down, though he was still rocking a little, slow, lazy rolls as he came against Doppio’s underwear, up against his shirt. Ooooh, his body was twitching… he felt sparks…

…he started to roll his hips again. Chasing that sharp, sparkling feeling. More, he wanted more, he didn’t know how to get it but he wanted it… “D-did you…?” he asked.

(snap him dig in tear him apart mash into little bits please just)

Doppio whimpered softly against Arven’s head, his legs locking up around Arven’s thigh as he just bounced his hips, Arven still making enough momentum himself to make it feel good and hot and electric and…

He shivered, feeling something wet shoot up against his leg and wet his underwear…but after a second, Arven kept moving, and Doppio could only keep in tandem with him, shivering at the feeling of the bare skin of their legs pressed together. 

Nodding a little, Doppio whined before pressing his lips to Arven’s cheek. Murmuring, “Before you…hard again. Feels good…”

“...good for you?”

Arven let out a little shaky laugh, before lightly kissing Doppio’s neck, still lazily rutting into him in slow, circular movements. “You did? I-I didn’t even notice… got so lost in you…”

Lifting up his head, adjusting his elbows to prop him over Doppio, he nodded, a dreamy, lustful look in his eyes. “It feels great for me. You feel great. I never really want to stop… y-you’re hard again? Can I…” Arven leaned down, kissing Doppio, saying against his lips, “Can I go again?”

Doppio let out a shaky sigh as Arven kissed at his neck, convinced…enough to ease up on his iron grip around Arven. Though he still kept touching, what, are you crazy?! Doppio had the most gorgeous person in the world perched over him, and he was not going to be expected to keep his hands to himself. Not when Arven looked…so happy, and eager, his hair falling over his face and that wide, fanged grin Doppio loved so much…

Cupping Arven’s face with both his hands, smoothing his thumbs over his cheeks (marveling a little at the difference in texture, just barely able to feel the edge of Arven’s scar with his left thumb) as they kissed, Doppio groaned through a laugh. “Please? Um…” He took a deep breath, more from necessity than any need of bravery. “...y-you can touch under my shirt too, if you want… Just want you close…”

“Yeah?” Arven grinned, eyes sparkling, before laughing a little. “Okay… then let’s try this again. I’m certain you felt something the first time.”

Sitting up, Arven adjusted himself so that he was both laying on top of Doppio, and sort of on the side of him. His hips flushed to him still, but his side sort of dipped against Doppio’s side, his arm bracing him as he gave Doppio little pecks, still now lazily rolling himself against Doppio, feeling his dick slowly get hard again. “Just… tell me if it’s too much,” Arven whispered, staring at Doppio, as his hand wandered up Doppio’s shirt. 

Even just touching Doppio’s stomach was incredibly exciting, the soft, dipping edges of his muscles fun to run his fingertips and thumbs against. But Arven kept climbing, Doppios shirt running up a little as he did, looking for something in particular…

There.

Finding Doppio’s nipple, Arven puzzled over the small, rough nub. He imagined what they looked like, as he lightly grazed his fingers over it. Maybe they were small and pink, like the rest of Doppio… before he started to play with the nipple a little more forcefully. Curiosity driving him to fiddle with the little nub between his thumb and forefinger, marveling at the way it seemed to harden in his grasp the more he played with it.

“What does that feel like?” Arven asked.

Reluctantly, Doppio let Arven’s face go, but it wasn’t long before he turned himself slightly too. Still very much lying on his back, but his hips slightly canted, propped and rolling much more on his left while his right hand traced along Arven’s hip. Not quite bold enough to touch bare thigh, but awfully close. 

Doppio’s breath kept hitching in excitement and anticipation as Arven explored up his stomach, his middle jolting at unfamiliar touch. But it was all a pleasant buzz, and as Arven got to his query…

“Nng…mn…fuck…” Doppio squirmed against Arven’s hips, losing the rotation of the rolls as electricity shocked down from his chest down his spine, energizing the already hot core bubbling in his gut. Huffing, Doppio tried to explain. “...s’a’lot…aah… like…p-pop rocks in my skin? B-but not as…horrifying? N’ha!” A breathy laugh bubbled out of Doppio before he groaned. 

He just…nnph, he just… Surging forward, Doppio pressed his lips to Arven’s and rolled more, capturing Arven’s leg and dragging his hips against it. Clutching Arven’s hip tightly, almost kneading the flesh there as he pulled Arven in more. Just needing more.

“Heh, l-let’s avoid the bad kind of pop rocks then.” Arven giggled, mostly because Doppio was laughing, and fuck, Arven was just happy.

But his breath caught in his throat, and he growled a little as Doppio pinched at his hips, his demand clear in the gesture. Arven, entirely because of the wince, gripped Doppio’s nipples a little harder then he meant to, and not wanting to hurt him, let go of it entirely, just running his hand over Doppio’s side as he hugged him closer, grunting a little as the rolling into Doppio’s hips once again became more urgent.

Arven could have done it from this position easily, but he wanted that ability to really shake into Doppio back. So, as they rolled into each other, Arven pressed more and more forward, rolling Doppio back onto his back, grunting and panting as he said into Doppio’s ear, “H-hey, tell me when you’re gonna cum this time…” Arven grinned, too excited to be self conscious as he admitted, “I wanna watch your face.”

And, with that, he started rolling as hard as he could again. Upping the speed as he felt his dick’s– and he had noticed, by now, what was happening with his dick, and he just couldn’t bring himself to correct it– head rubbing into the base of Doppio’s stomach as Doppio’s legs clutched at him, bending to accommodate the clutch. Arven wrapping his arm around Doppio’s back, just wanting to be close to him as he panted, “Aceto… A-aceto…”

Doppio let out a whine, his eyes fluttering as Arven pinched his nipples, full-body shakes wracking him for a moment and…well, it was probably because of that that Arven was able to roll them over again. A mantra of (digging tearing slashing ripping) in the far recesses of Doppio’s mind blotted out by Arven’s demand, and…really? Before Doppio knew it?

Hearing his name panted in his ear, Doppio’s mouth went slack, just keeping enough mind to stutter, “O-ora,” before his hips ground hard against Arven, his breath hitching quietly. That molten coil in his gut springing free as he spurted into his briefs again, the front visibly and tactilely soaked at this point. 

Arven was quick to adjust himself, pivoting on his arm to get a better look at Doppio’s face, reaching up to cup the side of his face gently as he watched. Doppio was beautiful. There was no other way to describe it. His eyes rolling up, the short, stuttering sound, like air was struggling to escape, while Doppio’s muscles all coiled together into tension. 

And when all of Doppio relaxed, twitching and shivering as his eyes closed, groaning now that his body would let him? Arven could watch that a thousand more times. Doppio in a tense, press of euphoria. Arven loved it. 

He leaned down to kiss Doppio, listening to Doppio whine against him as Doppio had to close his mouth to kiss him back, when it sounded a bit like he’d rather be panting. Arven couldn’t bring himself to feel bad. He wanted to kiss him. He wanted to kiss him while he rocked to his own climax.

It was easy. Doppio was warm and sticky and Arven pressed his stomach down, trapping his dick between them. It required him to make a sort of worm movement down him, but he loved feeling Doppio shiver and shudder against him as he did it, so Arven braced his knees into the bed and just rolled and rolled, pushing Doppio further into the mattress. “I’m so close, yes, there, right there, just…” Arven gasped, feeling his dick get caught between what felt like Doppio’s inner thigh and his dick, and Arven grasped Doppio’s back to help pin his dick into that spot, before just pounding into it. Grunting and gasping as the muscle around his dick swelled and tightened, Arven grasping Doppio’s back tightly as a violent shudder suddenly went through his body. “HAH! Ooooh, oh, oh gods, yes, yes, yes, yes, Aceto…”

Arven, maddeningly, still kept trying to roll, still chasing that high… but the sting of his dick, not to mention the reddening of his skin in that area, warned him that he couldn’t. That he was pushing it. Still he lazily rubbed himself against Doppio for a while, squeezing Doppio’s ass as he kissed him, his body tight and electric…

And after a moment, Arven’s body gave up. Collapsing somewhat on top of Doppio, panting. “...damn…” Arven said, “It’s like I’m going crazy. I have to stop, but… I just keep wanting more of you…”

Doppio often had…let’s say, difficulties with time. Even before the last few weeks. The gaps of missing time between his blackouts and memory lapses were obvious, but also…sometimes things just seemed to go by fast. Not like he was losing or skipping time, but just that everything was going by at double speed. Or sometimes the opposite, seconds stretching on into eternity. Sometimes both at the same time, things seeming to stretch on forever, and yet be done in an instant. 

And that was…kind of how things felt at the end there. It was like Doppio could feel every atom between him and Arven pressing together, each little tiny spark of an electric trail zooming and branching out in his body, each little tick of Arven’s hips dragging against his… Arven’s eye rapidly fluttering in a squint, almost like he was about to cry, his fangs prominent in his gaping mouth, the flush spreading across his face, but centered in around his nose… Scrunching so cutely…

But it was also like Doppio blinked, and suddenly Arven was collapsed on top of him, that comfortable heavy weight, even as his crotch stung and ached. Interested, but…more than loudly saying enough was enough. 

Almost mechanically, Doppio had to relax his grip around Arven, simply moving his hands to rest on his back and the back of his head, fingers threading through curls. Ash blond on this finger, chestnut brown on this…

Doppio closed his eyes as he sucked in a breath, laughing softly. “...fuck. We uh…really went at it, huh… I am…really bad at not breathing heavily.” But he could only laugh more as he pressed a light kiss to Arven’s temple. “I’ll live with it… Cazzo, sei così carino…mio tesoro prezioso.” (Fuck, you’re so cute…my precious treasure [/darling])

Arven looked up, giving Doppio a wide eyed stare, before thumping his head against Doppio’s shoulder. “Oh no. That’s right… oooooh, we’re so bad at this! Why are we so bad at resting?” Arven asked, and while there was a part of him genuinely distressed, he was laughing as he asked it. Because it was ridiculous. He had literally said before they started that they shouldn’t risk Doppio carrying him.

“You’re very generous.” Arven laughed, nuzzling his face into Doppio’s shoulder, holding him warmly and relaxing as he felt Doppio pet into his hair. “I, uh…I started acting a little w-weird at the second round. Sorry… that was maybe too aggressive?” Arven asked, looking up at Doppio, half a statement and half a question. “It felt aggressive. I kinda just wanted to like…”

Arven struggled to find the words. “...melt into you? That’s dumb, but that’s how it felt. Like if I pushed hard enough, we’d melt into each other. I just wanted to be as close as possible… I really like you, Aceto. I think it makes me a little wild.”

“...okay, but, how is your chest?” Arven asked, looking up at him in concern again, “Are you alright?”

Doppio snorted, before just breaking into a small laughing fit around his heavy breaths, comfortably holding Arven close. He could feel his legs trembling a little from being kept so tense but…just lying like this, it was pretty comfortable entwining their legs all…jelly-like. 

Fuckers didn’t want them to get tea and a pastry at a cafe? Fine, they’d just have sex then. :p bleeeeh

“No,” Doppio simply refuted (he was not generous, simply saying what he saw in front of him) before he shrugged a little. It…did get kind of intense, at the end there. It was hard to quantify, when all Doppio’s brain wanted to do was mush it all together into a feeling of nice, but…

Doppio’s eyes snapped open, almost alarmed by what Arven said. His…desire to melt. To (really get as close as Doppio longed for, no barriers no flesh just darkness and pressure and oneness and)

Doppio’s breath hitched and he turned his head to cough. Just once, though… He winced, taking stock of his body. “Uh…this seems kinda weird but…I feel kinda dizzy? Not like I’m out of air, th-though I, uh, do need to catch my breath but…” Slowly, a little confused, Doppio closed his eyes. “...maybe just need a sec.”

“Uh…i-is your foot okay? You didn’t put pressure on it, did you?”

“...I may have kicked it into the bed… once or twice,” Arven admitted, “It kinda smarts. I might need to double check the clasp, that was what was wrong last time.”

Worrying over Doppio, Arven frowned. “...if you don’t stop feeling dizzy… maybe we should get you looked at? That was a lot of heavy breathing… I’d be scared if I hurt you and we ignored it…”

Opening an eye, Doppio gave Arven a dry look. “...definitely double-check it. Then…do we still…? I guess it wouldn’t be cold anymore… We’ll get you a new ice pack. And then you’re gonna elevate and all that stuff.”

Though, fussing done, Doppio groaned, hiding his face in Arven’s shoulder. “...I would never live it down if I had to get a healer visit ‘cause we had sex… How mortifying is that. Kaito really would get us bunkbeds.”

“Okay, but hear me out…” Arven said, trying to put on a serious face, though the edges of it started to crack into a grin despite himself. “...I would still do that in a bunkbed. A bunkbed would not stop me. Just three times the amount of headboard to bang into the wall. Wow I hope we don’t have neighbors??”

Doppio snorted, gently rubbing tiny circles into the back of Arven’s head. “Just…the worst sort of tattling. Ever. I feel like we might be in the clear, though, if we haven’t heard elephant stomping down the hall by now.”

“...we are…super gross. You definitely came on me.”

Arven made a small, sheepish, cringing face. “I know I did. I have, in fact, not moved my hips away from you, because I am… pretty sure my dick is just straight up out. I uh… I need you to close your eyes while I tuck myself away, and then we can start cleaning up.”

Doppio hummed softly before his arm tightened (still gently) around Arven’s waist. “...I really liked that. Like you. Even if it’s gross now…you’re not gross. …in case that was in question.”

Taking a deep breath--his chest was…a little tired, if a chest could feel like that, but mostly alright…though the dizziness hadn’t really…abated much--Doppio leaned his head back and closed his eyes. “...alright. Eyes closed.”

Arven laughed lightly, before rolling on his back and– shivering at the cold– he quickly tucked himself back in, before even zipping himself back up… before looking quickly back up to the ceiling, trying not to look at Doppio’s area. “We are so wet. I’m so sorry. I should have changed my underwear, I knew it was gonna pop out from the beginning… felt really good though,” Arven admitted, grinning at Doppio. “Sorry. But it really did… sorry.”

Doppio paused before peeking an eye open--keeping his gaze strictly upward--confirming the safety, before he sat up, blinking dazedly a few times. Ooph…dizzy. Though, he did huff a small laugh at Arven as he gingerly got up, just…trying not to pay too much attention to how soaked and sticky his whole…crotch area was. And trying not to get anything anywhere else. “You did mention changing--I just thought…i-it’d be fine, you know? And it kind of is… Just definitely need a shower. And a change of clothes.”

Holding the end of his sweater down a bit, starting to feel self-conscious again, Doppio blushed as he looked at Arven. “Uh…do you want the bathroom first, or…?”

“No, go ahead, I know you’d be way more miserable waiting to get out of these clothes then I’ll be… though do hurry, because not being as grossed out to be this dirty does not mean I am not a little grossed out,” Arven laughed, sitting up, adoration in his face as he stared at Doppio. “...I know i keep saying this. But I like you a lot.”

“I’ll do my best,” Doppio laughed, quickly scurrying about the room to gather clean clothes…while also pulling his sweater down. Was he just grinding against Arven for two rounds? Yeah…but it was embarrassing just…being in his underwear. And, well, he just kind of had to deal with his legs being exposed, but…that was a little easier, he guessed. Maybe. It’d probably hit him more later. …thinking about it more now was making it worse, okay, hurry up. 

Pausing just behind the door of the bathroom, Doppio turned to give Arven a fond look. “I like you a lot too, Arven. …put your foot up while you’re waiting.”

“Will do,” Arven promised, laying back on the bed with a content, happy sigh… before his face started to flush. Wow… they had really just done that. It was a little embarrassing, in hindsight, just how… engrossed he had gotten. But it had been fun too.

…alright, let’s figure out his foot.

-

It was technically possible to start the exercise right away. But to Kokichi, it seemed like a better idea to decompress a bit after their emergency session and enjoy the rest of the day, him finishing work, Shuuichi working on some school assignments, Kaito checking on the boys, before Tim and the girls got out of school and they spent some time together playing dodgeball in the backyard. It was a nice, peaceful day…

And Kokichi figured that getting to rest right after facing a fake Tengan would be helpful too. 

So it wasn’t until that night, after they went to sleep, that Kokichi opened up a portal, gently raising his husband’s consciousness. “Are you ready, Kai-chan?”

Kaito had been, more or less, sleeping dreamlessly. But as always when they did this after he had taken his sleeping pills, he felt wide awake in the dream. Aware and conscious immediately, knowing more or less exactly where he was, if not exactly what his mind was going to look like in that moment.

Kaito looked around the void, before seeing Kokichi. A little plum color in the distance. What was he doing all the way over there? Kaito stood up and, taking a single step, felt the void shrink and then expand around him to let that single step take him directly to Kokichi’s side. Kaito looking down at his feet, before grinning at Kokichi. “Did you see that!? That was neat! Wait, let me do that again!” he said, motioning for Kokichi to stay still, before focusing on a spot in the distance, and stepping again.

He looked back from the step, and Kokichi was far again. Raising his palms to his mouth, Kaito called out, “‘Kichi! You try!”

“Ooh!” Kokichi awed, giggling a little as Kaito started…flash-stepping? That wasn’t quite right, but neither was teleporting. Whatever the term, it was very cool, and Kokichi bounced a little in place before focusing on the spot next to Kaito and--

“Very cool!” Kokichi cheered, leaning in to give Kaito a side-hug and kissing his arm. “Just wait, you’re gonna be a mental master before ya know it!”

“...but as fun as it’d be to just hang out? And…you know, we could,” Kokichi gave Kaito a soft look. “If you don’t want to, we could just spend some time together tonight. But I do wanna make sure you get some genuine sleep tonight, either way.”

“Aw, sleep is for losers,” Kaito joked, manifesting his meditation stone before, biting on his tongue and aiming, he threw it. Watching in honest delight as the stone sank into the white void, and all the whiteness rippled around them, like they were submerged in some impossibly clear, impossibly light water. Watching the void ripple, Kaito admitted, “I love this part. When for a little bit you make anything possible? How lucky am I?”

Holding out his hand, Kaito looked down at the void below them, puzzling over it like he was trying to work something out, stepping to the right once, twice… before grinning as his meditation stone whistled upwards, like it was falling down before rushing past them, hovering in the air for a moment as gravity shifted on it, before falling back down into Kaito’s waiting hand. “Ha! Nice…”

Kaito fussed with the rock a bit, looking at it… before he sighed. Pocketing it. “Alright, yeah, let’s just do this, right? I mean… it could help! No need to keep us both up like this if I’m not even gonna try to do this.”

Looking around, Kaito frowned. “Wait, hold on… where’s the vines? And the dogs? …Divine?”

Saint Madison stepped out behind them. “Yes?”

“Oh, there you are,” Kaito said, turning on his heels, looking up at the saint, “Aren’t you guys going to attack Kokichi?”

“We can, if you insist–”

“No! I just… don’t just sneaky do it when our guard’s down, got it?” Kaito said, suddenly looking stern, “Is that what you’re doing? Being sneaky?”

Saint Madison rolled her eyes. “If you must know, we’re currently expending your mental resources trying to prep for more invasions by that little creature who keeps throwing things in and running. Kokichi’s allowed to be here, you’re doing something practical, and I’m busy trying to evolve your defenses.”

Kokichi nodded sagely. “Losers who don’t have an adorable baby, for sure. She’s been pretty good through the night lately, but I’m still appreciating every bit of luck we get when something doesn’t bother her in the middle of the night. Lovely Miyas get peaceful sleep, and give daddies peaceful sleep too.”

Kokichi watched fondly as Kaito played around with the void of his mind. He really loved this part too…just getting to see his husband have fun with boundless curiosity. Given no limits, Kaito flourished and created, and it was always a joy to see…and to experience right beside him. It would be fun if that’s all they were going to do that night, but…

Humming as Saint Madison showed up, Kokichi sighed, twirling a few pieces of his hair before gently tugging on them. “So Amaina-chan’s still zippin’ in and out, then? I would hope that with the boys safe she’d cool it…but that’s not really her style.” He considered something for a moment before looking up at Kaito. “I think Maki-chan had a good idea, not telling them how involved with magic we are… But do you think we should let them know we know Amaina-chan, at least? It could make some communication easier…”

“Honestly? We might want to admit to that, just in case she ever mentions it,” Kaito said, shrugging a little. “I don’t really know what this, uh… lady? Thing? I don’t really know what the gal’s like, but the way she’s described kind of gives me an ‘unpredictable’ vibe. And Doppio and Arven’s trust in me is already in shreds, I don’t know if I want them finding out we know about Amaina from Amaina.”

“Maybe we can say…” Kaito frowned, scratching his chin, “Or, at least suggest, that Amaina’s been in and out of my head so much that I’ve just noticed her? And told you guys? Just suggest it’s coincidence?”

“She’s curious and playful to the full extent of those traits,” Kokichi smiled fondly, “But she’s taking her mentorship of Doppio very seriously. I think if it ever came up that letting them know we know would make the difference in keeping them safe, she’d tell them. It just…hasn’t been like that yet.”

Sighing, Kokichi rested his head against Kaito’s arm. “Depending on how much they actually know about psychics, that could backfire on us… But it might be the explanation that makes the most sense. I was half considering, if we ever told them, I’d just say that Amaina-chan’s a friend of mine, and leave it at that. But…that’s something I think we can hold off on at least for a little bit. Discuss more how to approach it. For now? The boys are safe and their business is being handled.”

Thinking about said business, though…Kokichi’s lips twisted, and he gave Kaito a dry, displeased look. “...I’ve been trying to get in touch with Professor Sada--Arven’s mom. It seems her poor communication isn’t solely something reserved for her son. Even just trying to find the right address has been a nightmare.”

Kaito took Kokichi’s hand, before idly walking through the void, listening to his husband talk as they wandered. As Kokichi explained his idea on how to discuss Amaina, Kaito nodded, before opening up a door, holding it for Kokichi as they wandered into the castle. Luminary’s castle. 

They were down at the drawbridge entrance, which would normally be busy with people coming and going. While the Luminous castle wasn’t a community center like Dicea’s was, it was a place of business, and many sections of the castle were used to hold court, act as counsel rooms, have, essentially, the bulk of Luminary’s greater government staff working within the castle walls. Along with them, the castle was busy with the castle support servants, an army of individuals who maintained the massive complex and the people who worked there, both the government staff and each other.

In a lot of ways, the point of the castle was similar to the point of Dicea’s castle. It just functioned more exclusively as a government building in a majority of it, and a pseudo city existing around that government center to accommodate the size of everything. It was constantly busy. 

But the areas of the castle that Kaito lived in didn’t reflect that business. The royal family lived in sections of the castle whose main points were its privacy. Without special permission, even servants catering to these areas could only walk through them in certain halls during certain times and essentially had to function as if they were invisible. In and out quickly. Head down. Only speak when spoken to.

It all seemed like a lot to Kaito now, admittedly. It was easier to live in the mess of people than he would have guessed before he started doing it. Indeed, as they climbed the ‘royal only’ staircase that gave travelers fastest access to some of the higher floors, Kaito could reflect that living alllll the way up these stairs rather than, say, near the ground level where everything was happening was pretty inconvenient. It was a little silly they had set things up this way.

Kaito’s nose wrinkled at talks of the missing professor. “It’s not possible she’s, like… dead. Or something. Is it? Arven said he got letters from her. Rarely, but he does… he couldn’t possibly just be getting really late mail?”

It was always astounding, seeing Luminary’s castle. From seeing the giant wall of its outside, to Kaito’s personal rooms, to…this, which Kokichi guessed was the entrance of what he would actually consider the castle…they all seemed like completely different areas. Different buildings, more figuratively than he supposed they actually were, if not places in entirely different cities. Maybe in the same one, but completely different districts, if it was a big city. 

He’d said it before, but…Kokichi felt like he could spend a lifetime looking through just the Luminary capital and still not experience everything. 

As they climbed a pretty intricate set of staircases, Kokichi sighed, some of his distaste bleeding away. “...it’s…theoretically possible, I guess… I’d have to look at the postmarks to really give a conclusive answer. But she’s been giving updates to her grant backers all this time--that’s how I’ve been trying to find a way to contact her.” Kokichi’s lips thinned. “She still has her research grants, but…if she’s called into court for a felony charge, they could be denied. And…you know, if the whole fact that she’s left her son here on his own wasn’t enough, having to defend herself in court to get her research money back would be a convincing factor, I’d think.”

Kokichi let out a harsher sigh, tugging at his hair a little. “...I understand why he didn’t, but…I really wish Arven had told a guard or a teacher or come to the castle or…something sooner. That someone would’ve encouraged him into it. It’s unacceptable, from the…like, vocational side of things? That she’s basically being rewarded while neglecting her child.”

“Of course just the fact that he’s been alone would be bad enough on its own,” he grimaced up at Kaito. “Years… I can’t believe it.”

“My guess? Everyone he told probably didn’t realize he meant, like, entirely alone, all the time,” Kaito guessed, glancing up at the staircase as they got to the floor he was aiming for, something tempting in him to keep climbing. “...the war room’s up here. If we climb to the top, I mean. It’s kind of cool, I think. It has a big map in it… wanna go see?”

“And, yeah, anyone who Arven actually confided the whole thing to? Was probably another teenager who thought his situation ruled. I mean, that’s basically how I found out. Arven wasn’t telling me, he was just openly telling Doppio more than anything. Like, it was probably so normalized for him and his classmates by this point, if it’s been happening since he was a little kid and he’s been around the same kids this whole time? If she’s been missing since elementary school, probably none of the highschoolers were just suddenly like ‘wait… that’s weird, right’? And he’d have new teachers all the time who are all thinking ‘a long time’ means she’s been missing a lot that year for an excavation. Still not as alarming as most of his childhood.”

“Ya know, a part of me reasoned that maybe that was happening to you, when I still wasn’t entirely convinced of your delusions, but I was starting to become convinced it wasn’t, like, blatant abuse? Like maybe just a bunch of terrible things had been happening to you for so long that everyone had started just thinking it was normal. That nothing was wrong,” Kaito mused, still staring up at the staircase. 

…his dad had died up there…

Sort of.

Kokichi sighed, nodding. “Lake-nee told me that’s kinda what she thought. Like…she heard his mom was off on an excavation, and…well, that’s still shitty to leave your kid alone for, but leaving for, like, six months makes sense, at least. But my sister assumed that Sada would…you know, be back. And spend time with Arven, making up for the time away and all that… People understand business trips, even if the planning is something they might do differently. But business trips aren’t usually…for years.”

And in a kid’s eyes? It was probably incredible, not having any adult supervision! …until you were actually living it.

Kokichi shook his head a little. “That is a real danger… And that’s why it’s so important to take a step back and really observe a situation. I’m just lucky that wasn’t actually happening to me…for all of the issues that were there anyway.”

Following Kaito’s gaze up the staircase, Kokichi frowned and stole his hand, squeezing it gently. “...if that’s something you want to confront tonight too, we can give it a shot. But we need to be open about what we’re doing… If you’re not ready, I don’t think going up there just to sightsee would be a good idea.”

“...yeah,” Kaito said, letting Kokichi’s hold on his hand bring him back down to earth, sighing as he looked away. “Yeah, no, there’s nothing to confront up there. Not really. And if there is, I’m… not up to it. It’d probably just be depressing.”

Heading into the connecting hall, it opened up to what looked like a beautiful, overly grandiose lobby, essentially. It was a floor that opened up to a balcony that gave a massive view of many of the floors below, a very ‘look upon my domain’ sort of view, with massive windows in the back that gave an equally stunning view of the city and other parts of the castle in the back. This was, essentially, where royal guests were meant to be greeted by all the ‘splendor’ of the Momota family, and this was exemplified by the many royal portraits hanging around, each portrait elaborate and splendid to behold, but in the back center, displayed in a place of honor, bordered by the windows showing off Luminary to the guests behind, essentially, the portrait’s back, was a massive portrait of King Leon. Sitting on the throne, looking large and imposing, with a variety of symbols and imagery that were all, essentially, meant to be metaphors to his legacy. Behind him, essentially one of the symbols of his legacy, Princess-Consort Sayaka stood, one hand on the back of his throne, beautiful, if distant looking.

Kaito grinned to see it. Pointing like Kokichi could have possibly missed it, as he asked, “Guess who those two are! Check it out, look at that, this is your first time seeing my parents, right? The man with the red hair is King Leon. You can see where I get my good looks~” Kaito grinned, before pointing to Sayaka. “And that blue-haired beauty is my mother, Princess-Consort Sayaka! Oh, oh, there’s portraits of my whole family around this area, who else should I point out… oh! See her over there? That small portrait in the corner? That’s my aunt! Princess Ibuki. She looks cool, right? That hair is natural. Um, who else, oh! There’s my great grandfather over there, from my dad’s side. If the portrait is really big like that, it means they ruled at some point. You see that chip in his ear? The official story is he got that in battle, but it’s a family secret that what really happened was he got drunk hunting and–”

“Prince Kaito?” Head Secretary Tengan called, shuffling into the grand lobby, looking old and frail and smiling a warm, friendly smile. “You know you’re not meant to dawdle here. This is not a place for children. Let’s move on now.”

Kaito’s whole body had tensed, looking back at the head secretary, who was already moving on, shuffling down a hallway. Kaito frowned, no idea why his mind had manifested that now… before he glanced up at Kokichi. “Sorry, I must have triggered a memory or…”

…up?

Kaito looked down at his body, before tensing more. “No, no, no, we are not doing it like this. Absolutely not. Grown up, go back to grown up. Now,” Kaito said, staring at his child hands. No good. Closing his eyes, he tried again. “Come on, annnnd… now. Now. Think grown up thoughts. Shuichi’s thick ass. Kokichi’s cute dick. You need to make certain there’s more formula ready for the weekend tomorrow. You are grown up…”

Kaito peeked down at himself. “Damn!” the kid cursed.

…Kokichi didn’t think that was entirely true, but Kaito not being ready for it was. So they moved on. One day, perhaps, they would come back and climb those stairs, ready to face a different memory…but not today. 

Kokichi was happy to help his husband any way he could, and that was meaningful on its own, but…well? Getting to see the Luminary Castle was a pretty cool side benefit. Kokichi gaped as he looked around the balcony room, jogging to the railing and peeking over, before marveling at the windows and the world beyond…

And the portraits. Kokichi had seen Sayaka in Shuuichi’s memories, and he’d seen caricatures of Leon, but this really was the first time he was seeing them as…how they had wanted to be seen by Luminary. Grand, powerful…untouchable. In itself, just that was enough to stun Kokichi as he stared wide-eyed at the portraits of the Momota family…but the craftsmanship of the paintings was still in his head too. The choice to portray light was dramatized in a very painterly way, but for paintings that were meant to be beheld in drama? It worked, and somehow gave the impression that Kokichi could call out, and the people would look back through the portal, like they were just a room away. Far…but real. 

Kokichi could barely tear his eyes away to look back at Kaito, grinning as he told personal stories of the people behind the portraits, but that good cheer stiffened as a wish-it-wasn’t-familiar voice called out behind them. Kaito’s mind beating them to the punch, it seemed…

Kokichi scowled as the memory moved on, before sighing, looking down at--

Down?

(...Doppio’s abuse had hurt so much because it reminded Kaito of being a child. Being exposed to that violence.)

With a gentle look, Kokichi put a hand on a weirdly thin shoulder. “...I can…encourage your consciousness to take your adult form back. But…and this might just be me doing armchair psychology? You might have something worth trying to work through, from your child self’s perspective. What do you want, Kai-chan?”

“I.. I don’t know?” Kaito said, looking a little alarmed, before splaying his arms out. “‘Kichi, look at me! Who’s beating the shit out of anyone this size!? Look at my biceps! Look, that doesn’t pop at all!” Kaito sputtered, bringing up his shirt sleeve– his favorite childhood maroon shirt, with fun bumpy stitchwork around the sleeves and collar and little sparkles of gold, he could only vaguely realize in that moment– and flexing his arm, his skinny child arms indeed not bulging at all. “I am so small! I am really bad at fighting right now!”

There was another set of footsteps now. Someone coming back from the opposite way, multiple someones. Their footsteps were heavy, and Kaito stepped back, straightening his back while also lowering his head a little, as he saw the familiar sight of his father with his private advisors walking across the lobby, towards the staircase that would take them up to the war room.

Well, it would have been familiar, but all of the individuals looked… wrong. Kaito could recognize where everyone would be standing, just by habit, but their bodies were morphed and fuzzy. Swirling colors of sludge, all somehow contained in a vague human silhouette. His father’s silhouette a morphed mix of reds and black, looking vaguely like he was melting as he and the other agglomerates walked by. 

The only person who looked human was General Juzo, who was looking exasperated as he quietly listened to the men talk in those urgent voices that Kaito had heard growing up, when a bunch of people were all trying to get his father’s attention at once, daring to talk over each other until King Leon would focus on something that had caught his interest. General Juzo never played that game. He demanded attention, when he was ready to speak. The other men could try to talk over him, but he always shut them down in a way that Kaito had marveled at, growing up. Kaito had always wondered if he’d be able to do that someday.

General Juzo glanced over, spotting Kaito in the lobby, and glancing at the mess of melting, colorful figures continuing to the staircase, General Juzo broke off from them, heading over to Kaito. “Head Secretary Tengan said you were being difficult again. You’re lucky King Leon’s too busy right now to handle a prince being a brat. Why are you dodging tutoring, Prince Kaito?”

Kaito stared up at Juzo, getting lost in the memory. A little in awe at the massive man. He was everything Kaito wanted to be someday… “Sorry…”

General Juzo sighed, glancing over at the disappearing group of advisors, before scoffing as he took Kaito’s arm, pulling him towards where they had just come from. “Come on, I’m walking you there. You know they’re never going to consider you for leadership if you can’t keep up with that cousin of yours. You need to take these study sessions seriously, or no one is ever going to take you seriously.”

Kaito nodded vaguely. Blinking a little dizzily… before looking back at Kokichi. “Can you make this pause? I think I’m getting caught up…”

Kokichi couldn’t help smiling a little as his husband lamented his lack of large biceps, though he did know there was nothing to laugh about in Kaito feeling powerless. “You don’t have to be good at fighting to be able to fight, hun. And I’m not gonna let anything here hurt you…maybe even to the point of ruining the exercise, but I’d rather go back to the drawing board than see you hurt.”

…that may be more difficult than promised, though. 

Looking back at the new group of footsteps, Kokichi frowned a bit at the…blobs of people. Just impressions of people who were real, but…not important enough for Kaito to note. …not even his father. 

But General Juzo was. And Kokichi sighed softly. Lamenting the man’s fate, and wishing he could’ve known him better…even if Kokichi knew there was no stopping either course, with the hands they had been dealt. 

Even with that lament, though, Kokichi’s eyes narrowed. There were more considerations to give, but…right then? Hearing Juzo encourage the “study” sessions, putting Kaito down, comparing him to Kaede…

Kokichi felt his hackles rise, and he was already by Juzo and Kaito’s side, ready to pull the general off his husband…before Kaito spoke up. And Kokichi let out a little breath, nodding. “On it.”

And…everything did pause. Juzo suddenly losing expression and just standing there idly, letting go of Kaito, any ambient footsteps elsewhere in the castle going quiet. Kokichi gave Kaito a worried look. “...want me to bring you back to adult-ness?”

Kaito let out a shaky breath, relieved as Juzo stilled. Pulling his arm out of the man’s hand, Kaito stood back a few steps, giving the larger man a nervous look. “I realize what memory I triggered,” Kaito said, before looking around, grinning shakily, “H-hold on, you’ll like this, where did he… there! Right there! He hid there, so…”

Kaito laughed, pointing at a major statue of a sexily clad woman– an artist’s rendition of Molly Malone, meant to be symbolic of the plague rebellion that had brought the Momota family to power– and peeking around it, a child Shuichi looked around warily. Lowering his hat over his head, Shuichi straightened his shoulders and put his hands demurely in front of his hips, before walking off like he had any right to be there. Trying to sneak through by looking like he belonged, now that Kaito had been dragged away.

“Shuichi’s not allowed to be here. I mean, kids aren’t meant to linger here at all, like Tengan was saying, but Shuichi shouldn’t be here at all,” Kaito explained, “Not without official escort. Kid me didn’t count. But I wanted to show off the portraits, so I snuck him in, and then…” Kaito waved vaguely towards Juzo. “That happened.”

“Isn’t he cute?” Kaito grinned, watching child Shuichi hurry off, though he knew this fundamentally was him imagining what happened to Shuichi once he was off to a lesson. “Man, so I must be… 10? Right now?” Kaito guessed, looking down at himself. “...noooo. There’s no way I was smaller than Timothy at 10. Bullshit. Am I smaller than Tim? Maybe I just feel smaller cause I’m physically smaller now.”

“And Shuichi’s 11! Or at least almost 11 by this point.” Kaito grinned fondly. “Cute… but, let’s… go ahead and make me bigger. I just… for one, I really got lost in the memory there for a second. I have a feeling this isn’t gonna work if I can’t tell I’m dreaming, you know? So, yeah, if I can’t put myself back in my big body, let’s brute force it, babe.”

Following Kaito’s lead, Kokichi followed his finger over to a lovingly carved stone statue…before he grinned widely. Squeeing in his throat to express the appropriate cuteness of a - “Baby Shuu-chan!! Awww, look at him… Aw, his hat really was too big on him…little Shuu-chan…”

It seemed like just the sort of memory Kaito would bring, even if it wasn’t on purpose. Just one instance among many of wanting to share his plenty with his loved ones. At the ages they were, though, then…this was right around the time Kaito and Shuuichi had first met. Aw, his little husband…Kokichi could only imagine how nerve-wracking yet exciting it must’ve been, getting into a restricted area like this…

Raising an eyebrow, Kokichi giggled a bit before nodding…before pausing for one moment. “Hold on, I don’t get to do this often…” With joy, Kokichi put his arms around Kaito, hugging him tight, and swaying him a little since even as a child, Kokichi still couldn’t pick him up. But as Kokichi pulled away…

“There we go,” he hummed approvingly, looking up at Kaito. “Back to normal.”

Kaito grinned, happily being swayed, content to be in an armful of Kokichi. Though, when Kokichi stepped back, Kaito relaxed a little as he was suddenly, well… much higher from the floor. Phew, it was high up here… woo! Giant privileges again! 

“Thank you, babe.” Kaito grinned, leaning down to kiss Kokichi, before grasping his hands into fists. “Okay! Time to go beat up my childhood bully! It’s gonna be super easy! Just gonna go punch his stupid old face! Come on, Kokichi, time to beat up an old man!”

Kaito walked past the frozen Juzo, heading down the hallway he would have been led down in the first place. This was gonna be fine! Think of it as a goal, rather than, like, a mental exercise of self reflection or whatever. The goal was to punch Tengan! In his face! One, two, pow! Yeah, practice the punches. Air box, one two punch! See those biceps! Those were adult, old man punching biceps! 

Shadow boxing a little, Kaito got to the study door. He pounded his fists together, breathing out furiously through his nose. He was gonna do it! Gonna go in there and punch Tengan! Wanna be fucking weird to him his whole damn life? Weird fucking scary headgames!? Bullshit punishments that made people look at him funny when he mentioned them, like, no, obviously that didn’t happen, you’re exaggerating or mis-saying it, cause Kid Kaito knew that everyone knew but it was better for everyone to pretend they didn’t know because that was just how things worked–

But they couldn’t have. They couldn’t have. No one would have let that happen to him, if they had known. So everyone knew and no one knew and Kaito had grown up believing both of these things so earnestly…

Kaito went to go open the study door– just punch him, punch him in the face, if you punch him they can say they did the experiment and he could leave– but the door opened up before Kaito could grasp the handle, Tengan opening the door.

“Ah, there you are. I expect your father finally had a word with you. Good, good, come in, your grace.” The Head Secretary smiled warmly, shuffling backwards to let Kaito in. “Take a seat, we’re still going over some history. Just settle in, we’ll let you know when we’re ready for you.”

Inside, a 13-year-old Byakuya was sitting on the couch, looking bored, a massive book on his lap. Tengan was teaching Byakuya population manipulation tactics the country had used successfully in the past to mitigate depletion and control resources during the last recorded famine. A lot of lessons were about famines in Luminary’s past. It was a known thing, that whoever was going to lead Luminary next was going to, by the later part of their life, deal with the next predicted famine. It was inevitable. The useable farmland was just going to expire and need to be reset and left to rest to be useable again. There was no avoiding it, not with the setup Luminary currently had.

Kaito looked around the study. It had been a long time. It looked… so normal. This whole scene felt so normal. Just an old advisor teaching the heir-apparent history that would be useful for his reign. The fire was on in the fireplace. The window curtains were open. A warm spring day was bringing in a pleasant smell, the smoke from the factories blowing the opposite direction. 

Kaito hesitated, a little taken aback by the lack of immediate things to rage against. He looked back at Kokichi sheepishly, a little embarrassed. “Uh, whelp… welcome to uh… the most traumatic memories of my life?” Kaito finished lamely, gesturing to Tengan and Byakuya, the two looking and talking quietly over the old history book. “... I swear, it gets worse than this.”

As happy as Kokichi was to be with Kaito (always), and as supportive as he wanted to be, as Kaito was psyching himself up…his reaction was immediate, as the memory of Tengan opened the study door. The wrinkling of his nose, the heavy scowl… His visible disgust and displeasure only increased as he saw the child Byakuya in the study too. 

The most traumatic memories of Kaito’s life. 

Trying to calm his expression more, he saw Kaito’s awkwardness and nerves, and Kokichi could only sigh. “You don’t have to convince me, hun. I believe you. What this is, is just…”

…Shuuichi had needed a…break in the ice too. 

Kokichi took in a breath. “...I always regretted missing, before.”

And rearing up, Kokichi took a great swing, socking Tengan’s memory in the jaw. For good measure, snatching that bastard’s cane from his hands and starting to swing it like a baseball bat, following through with every swing that cracked against Tengan’s body. 

“YOU ABSOLUTE DISGUSTING WASTE OF A PERSON!” Kokichi screamed as he wailed on the elderly man. “HOW COULD YOU?!? THEY WERE CHILDREN! THEY HAD THEIR WHOLE LIVES IN FRONT OF THEM!”

“I’M GLAD YOU’RE DEAD!!! I WISH THE UNIVERSE HAD NEVER BEEN SO UNFORTUNATE AS TO PUT TOGETHER THE PARTICLES OF YOUR SOUL IN THE FIRST PLACE! YOU DESERVE HAVING EVERYTHING YOU’VE EVER WORKED FOR DESTROYED AND FORGOTTEN, DISMANTLED BY YOUR OWN FUCKING BODY!”

“I HATE YOU!!!”

Tengan’s body crumbled against the blows.

He sputtered out, falling off the couch just in his attempt to get away from the blows, putting his hands up to protect his face as the swings kept coming down on him. He attempted to say something, but the first swing had knocked against his jaw, and either his jaw or some teeth were broken, all his attempts to speak just gargling spatters of blood. 

Byakuya, in turn, raised an eyebrow, bringing up his legs onto the couch to avoid the visceral debris of his mentor’s body, wrinkling his nose in distaste. “Well, I suppose that was just a matter of time, really,” Byakuya muttered, warily shuffling backwards to sit on the arm of the couch, trying to get out of the way of the errant swings. “Well, good job, Kaito. You’ve gone and broken your pacifist husband. Only to be expected, everyone does always end up having to fight your battles for you.”

Still screaming, Kokichi didn’t even look at Byakuya, but he did point, snapping out, “YOU SHUT UP! This isn’t about you, shithead!”

Kaito’s small body shook violently, watching this with wide, horrified eyes. His hands were up and bordering his face, like he was hiding if he managed to block his peripherals, staring incomprehensibly at Tengan, who was gargling on the floor. A much, much smaller, younger Kaito jolted as Kokichi screamed at Byakuya next. “‘K-kichi, s-stop…” Kaito said quietly, staring down at the ground as he trembled, “I-I’m sorry, I d-didn’t… ‘don’t like this…”

Kokichi did stop at Kaito’s word, his rage not all-encompassing, blinding red. His rage was just…pain. Pain expressed in screams of hate and injustice, in blows he’d never do in real life, but expressed his turmoil, in the streams of hot tears running down his cheeks. Pain that made Kokichi tremble as he stopped, sniffling and scowling at the mess he’d made before he turned to Kaito. 

Regret tingeing his watery eyes as he saw how small Kaito had become, before he gently moved to his husband’s side. Not reaching out to touch, but blocking his view. 

“...I hate him,” Kokichi warbled, still crying. “I hate how they hurt you. And I hate everyone in this castle that ignored it. You didn’t deserve this, Kai-chan.”

Kaito– he might have been 5, he couldn’t know for sure– felt his eyes water seeing Kokichi’s face crumble into tears. Reaching forward, Kaito hugged Kokichi the best his little arms could, doing his best to hold his husband as he reassured him. “I know, I know, it’s okay. You did really good! Y-you already protected me from him more than anyone else ever did! You made him leave, remember? He was gross and treating my head like a s-second home, and you evicted him. And you left me Saint Madison, and barking dogs, and overly aggressive vines, and…”

Kaito sighed, closing his eyes as he held Kokichi more securely, feeling bigger now as he cradled his husband against himself. “You’ve fought him off more than anyone else ever even considered trying to. You saw a problem and solved it, Kokichi. I’m very lucky to have you. Atua blessed me with you. You fought him when no one else would… thank you…”

“...I don’t want to punch Tengan,” Kaito realized with a sigh, shifting backwards, rubbing some of the tears off Kokichi’s face. “That was terrifying, I don’t… want that. I was scared. I know you needed that, but… that really just showed me how little I want to fight them. Any of them.”

“I just want to talk to them,” Kaito said softly, “...I know that’s pointless. They’re not real. But when has that ever mattered to me anyway? Sometimes you don’t get to confront people. All you can do is talk to a version of them in your head and… hope it’s enough. I just want to talk to them, Kokichi. Okay?”

Kokichi hugged his little husband firmly as he cried. He had fought Tengan. He had protected Kaito. Sometimes he had messed up, but Kokichi had always tried to defend his husband whenever he saw it happening…because he loved him. And Kokichi never wanted his loved ones to be hurt. 

…and that’s just why Kaito’s abuse made him so angry. Why Shuuichi’s and Maki’s abuse infuriated him. Because they had been hurt. And Kokichi knew how important it was to start to heal from the wounds left, and focus on the present and the future more…but it was a hard-fought battle for Kokichi to ever forgive the people who had failed his family in the first place. Even when their choices were reasonable and they were trying to make up for it now. 

…that’s what made the people who had made horrible choices and only chose to continue to make things worse now monsters in Kokichi’s eyes. 

Holding Kaito close, Kokichi sniffled, “You deserved help before me.”

…but he did understand. 

With one last squeeze, Kokichi let Kaito lean back and brush away his tears, nodding tiredly. “Okay. Just talking. But I’m warning you…if they start getting uppity with you, I’m gonna spit on them. Gonna hawk a loogie, too, the whole deal, get all the spit and snot on them. It won’t be pretty…so they better behave.”

Kaito laughed. How the hell could he not? Kokichi was so sincere about it. He was furious, he wasn’t joking, he was absolutely gonna spit on some guys if they dared sass Kaito. And that was really fucking funny. 

“Your grace, if you’re not too caught up flirting, could we move this along?” the Head Secretary said, sitting on the couch again. Signs of his damage still there, wiping blood from his mouth, but looking far more put together again. “We did have lessons to get to.”

“Oh, fuck, don’t, seriously, Kokichi will lose it,” Kaito warned the memories, placing a kiss on Kokichi’s cheek and saying warmly, “My fierce husband… Alright. Alllllright. Time to have this conversation.”

Getting up with a stretch, Kaito looked around. There was nowhere else to sit. There had never been anywhere else to sit but the couch in this study. Kaito had always been made to sit on the floor. 

Well, alright. Scooting the table back, Kaito sat on that instead, giving the two figments tired looks. Now that he was starting, a little lost. He wasn’t sure what he wanted to say…

“...do you think he loved me?” Kaito asked Byakuya, gesturing to Tengan. “Like… maybe deep, deep, dee–”

“No,” Byakuya said, looking a bit disgusted at the idea, “You know he didn’t. Why do you even want him to have? What, would his sexual abuse be more ‘romantic’ that way– gah!” 

Kaito had a rolled up sheet of paper, and he reached over and smacked Byakuya in the face with it. He stared at the rolled up sheet, confused where it had come from. Oh, huh… okay… that wasn’t the same as hitting, but it was humiliating. Had been humiliating. Kaito could roll with that. 

“Don’t say shit like that. You know that’s not what I mean. I just… he really did work so hard to mentor you into being a leader. Sometimes I wonder if maybe… if at any point in our history, maybe he had ever tested me to see if I could be worth that sort of attention too, and I had failed. If I had ever had a chance?” Kaito said, still looking at Byakuya. Finding it easier than turning his gaze at Tengan. “What do you think? You were older, did you ever… see me as potential competition?”

“No,” Byakuya said.

“Well, what do you know, you’re not even real,” Kaito muttered.

“I’m an honest accumulation of everything you ever said or saw in me,” Byakuya said, now older. Looking like the adult Kaito had left behind in Luminary almost two years ago. “And maybe we never had this conversation, specifically, but you hinted and needled and whined about things that were close to this, and I was always honest with you. When we discussed you? It was purely as a toy. You weren’t even human, in these discussions. You were a function. He never hinted at anything else.”

“And, frankly, suggesting whatever he felt towards me was ‘love’ is nearly deranged, Kaito.” Byakuya scoffed, “I was at best a passion project for him. He wasn’t either of our parents. Just enjoyed the process of pretending more, with me. I imagine he told himself pretty lies of ‘legacy’. There’s a reason I hated him. You know you were merely the breaking point, not the entire reason I turned on him.”

“Yeah… I know,” Kaito whispered, before looking to Tengan. “...”

“Well?” Tengan said, “Go on.”

“...it’s so hard to talk to you,” Kaito admitted softly, “You really were a monster.”

There was silence for a bit. Kaito trying to think of what he really wanted to say to him.

“...I wish…” Kaito sighed, “I wish it wasn’t so obvious, how you just wanted to use me. I grew up thinking you were so smart. So smart, that all of the things you did to me had to be for some greater purpose. Some grand plan. I took a lot of comfort in that idea, that it all had meaning… Why did all of that happen?”

“Why did all of that happen?” Tengan mused, running his old, withered fingers through his beard. “...well, you were a very handsome child. Even small, quite cute. Very endearing–”

Kaito, weakly, reached over to bonk Tengan over the head with the rolled up paper. Tengan sighed. “Your parents were already falling apart back then. I knew Luminary was going to fall to ruin fairly soon. Nothing really mattered, even if sometimes I talked like it did. Other times, you could tell, I talked like it was all quite amusing. It was easy to turn your parents against you, I just had to play to their insecurities when it came to you–”

“No,” Kaito whispered, shaking his head, “That’s just me wanting to excuse what they did. Maybe he didn’t help, but he didn’t make them do that either. You weren’t a mastermind, you were just… an asshole. Fucking around.”

Tengan smiled, nodding. “I saw opportunities to get my kicks from you and took them. You’re right. That’s really all it was.”

Like he’d planned to from the start, Kokichi was going to stick around and supervise. His husband didn’t need a babysitter in his mind, of course…but Kaito’s imagination could be very cruel to him. So while Kokichi’s power was needed for this to happen in the first place, at least as it was, he was sticking around “in-person” too. 

But as Kaito got started, Kokichi…got a little creative. Nothing big, but from other memories, not really associated with the study, he summoned himself a stool to sit on, and a water bottle. Watching Kaito get a conversation he’d never get in real life…but sipping behind him. Keeping close eyes on Tengan and Byakuya, and drinking deeply from his water bottle if they happened to look over. Promising to keep his threat. 

Though Kaito had his own answer for it too. Saving them from Kokichi’s wrath with a lesser evil. 

Kokichi was very proud, watching his husband bonk Byakuya on the head. 

…there was no real good answer to get from this conversation. It wasn’t actually Tengan and Byakuya, for one, so there would be nothing new, really… But that wasn’t the point. The answers Kaito’s memories gave were…exactly what the real version would give if forced to, once in their lives, actually be straight-forward and have some self-reflection, as Kokichi saw it. 

It just sucked that their answers sucked. That Byakuya was selfish and ego-driven and prone towards cruelty, and that Tengan was the worst kind of nihilist that wanted to fuck around. There wasn’t a deeper meaning or a grand plan under it all, like Kaito had once wished. It was just…some of the worst parts of human nature that had, unfortunately, surrounded Kaito entirely in his childhood.

…but Kokichi was glad Kaito could take this opportunity to face it.

Kaito fussed with the rolled paper in his hands, staring at the two of them. Certainly there was more he wanted to say than that, but… at the moment, it was escaping him. He didn’t know what other questions he needed answering. Not when all he really wanted to do was ask why, why, why, why??

He knew why. 

The answers just sucked.

“...I want an apology,” Kaito said softly.

Neither of them said anything. Tengan looked amused and Byakuya seemed irritated. So Kaito said it again. “I want an apology.”

“Kaito, honestly, this is pathetic. We’re not real–”

“I WANT MY FUCKING APOLOGY!” Kaito shouted, suddenly standing up. Knowing, deep down, nothing was truer than this. If it wasn’t a secret plan? If it wasn’t its own type of love? If it wasn’t anything that could justify what had happened to him… then he wanted someone to fucking apologize for it! He didn’t care if it meant nothing, he wanted a god damn ‘sorry’! “You two RUINED my childhood! You did it for no FUCKING REASON! The–the–the fucking games!?” Kaito shouted, looking around the study, before heading to the bookshelf. Pulling out boxes where he knew the pieces were stored, opening them up and bringing them to the couch, dumping slips of paper over their heads and little jacks and marbles and sticks where all of them were the same size except one, and it was never the one he picked! Dumping them over their heads as he said, “This!? This bullshit! I want an apology for every stupid fucking children’s game you ever ruined for me! I want a fucking apology for–” Kaito growled, grabbing the marbles from the couch cushion and throwing them at Tengan’s face, who winced, “Making me look fucking CRAZY to the other kids, because, oh, fuck, Kaito can’t handle losing! Kaito screams and gets angry and still loses anyway, why does Kaito lose ALL THE DAMN TIME? Oh, I don’t know, maybe some crazy old bastard made it fucking TERRIFYING to win!?”

“And, and, and this shit, where is it, I know it’s here, everything’s here.” Kaito snarled, going back to the bookcases and opening the bottom cabinets, pulling out collars and leashes and letting balls roll across his feet, before bringing it over to Byakuya and showing him the leash. “I’M THE PERVERT!? You fucking used this shit on me! But, no, I’m the pervert, I’m the weak willed slut who let Tengan change me, you thought you were so much fucking better than me because, oh, if Kaito’s sleeping around, he really was brainwashed, my poor!” Kaito hit the leash down on top of Byakuya’s head, snarling, “Stupid! Simple minded brother! Who could never stop SUCKING FUCKING COCK! Because god forbid it’s possible maybe I just would have fucking liked sex either way! I’m not a whore, FUCK YOU!”

Kaito threw the collar and leash at Byakuya, snarling at him as he took a few steps back, “You thought these were funny; if anything, you were brainwashed, who the fuck treats family like an actual fucking dog!? You’re the pervert! I want a fucking apology for every time you made me feel like a slut! You had no right!”

Kaito stepped back, his hands shaking, as he glared at them. “You made me crazy. You made it so hard for me. I couldn’t control my emotions, and I doubted everything I ever did, and you both made me feel like every relationship I ever had all fucking stemmed back to this fucking room… I was ALLOWED TO BE ANGRY! I DIDN’T DESERVE TO BE OSTRACIZED FOR IT! ANYONE WOULD HAVE BEEN ANGRY!”

“I want an apology,” Kaito whispered, his whole body shaking, tears in his eyes, “I want them to know what they did was wrong. I want them to admit it. I want them to admit it.”

Really…it didn’t matter that they weren’t real. Would it be better if the real Tengan and Byakuya gave Kaito a real apology? Of course, what kind of leading question was that?! Even if Kokichi never wanted them to talk to Kaito again, if somehow they ever felt true remorse and finally got the bravery to apologize to Kaito, that would be amazing. 

But Kaito was never going to get those apologies in real life. Tengan was dead. Byakuya was too far up his own ass to do anything but suck shit for years, and while Kokichi could someday hope for him to grow up a little…it didn’t seem likely. 

…but allowing Kaito to envision those apologies for himself? …to apologize to himself straight up, for the shame and guilt their actions had instilled in him?

That was important. And Kaito deserved those apologies. 

It was awful, seeing all the toys. Seeing, and hearing Kaito say straight out, that games had just been ruined for him. 

It was horrifying, seeing the dog toys. Kokichi put his bottle down, staring at the mess with wide, horrified eyes. He had known a little, the words and insults, the sitting on the floor stuff…but somehow it was even worse seeing that Tengan had gotten props. That Byakuya had used them. Kokichi didn’t think his husband’s anger at being compared to a dog had ever been unreasonable or an exaggeration…but seeing this just made it a cold fury in his heart. 

Clenching his jaw, Kokichi glared at the memories from behind Kaito. His eyes gleaming just as cold and sharp as amethysts. Kaito deserved his apology. Give it.

Kaito was huffing, glaring at the figments. He wanted his apology! Just say sorry! Just… say it! It didn’t have to sound believable! Kaito didn’t have to believe it! He just… he just wanted to hear it…

… he couldn’t imagine them doing it. They both just stared at him, surrounded by the proof of all the ways they had hurt him. Just… as unaffected by his pain and fear and anger as they had been when it happened…

“...’Kichi?” Kaito whispered, feeling a little defeated, “Could you… ya know. Could you make them… I’m sorta struggling…”

For all the wonderful things in Kaito’s head…there were things that even he couldn’t imagine. 

Giving Kaito a soft, sympathetic look, Kokichi took a breath. Locking eyes with Byakuya. {Apologize to him. You know it wasn’t right. Your own personal fears support that. …you wish things had been different. That you had been believed, and that things could’ve gotten better. You’re sorry.}

Looking to Tengan… {Apologize to him. You’re a sick fuck and you should have never looked at Kai-chan as anything but the future of the nation. You’re a failure, for never giving him the opportunities that were rightfully his. You’re sorry.}

…it still felt lacking. But for all Kokichi’s force of it already made it unrealistic…he couldn’t bring himself to make them say things he and Kaito knew would never be true. He couldn’t make Byakuya say that he wanted to try and atone to his family, to congratulate Kaito on his wedding and binding ceremony, to wish him a happy birthday and a fruitful Pudiciam and a spiritual Atua’s week. He couldn’t make Tengan say he had ever really cared about Kaito… 

But hopefully this would be…something. 

Whatever Kokichi was doing, Kaito could see it start working immediately. And, maybe that was because Kaito, in a way, could ‘hear’ what Kokichi had said. He was projecting at figments in Kaito’s mind, after all. All Kaito was doing was… compartmentalizing.

But while a second ago, imagining how they might apologize had felt impossible, suddenly it felt, if not easy, than having more potential to at least start. Kaito shuffled backwards a bit, pushing the table back, when both of the men got onto their knees. And while something was inherently alarming in that, Kaito forced himself to not fight the mental image, even if a part of him kept screaming wrong, wrong, wrong when they put their hands on the ground.

“Fine,” Byakuya muttered, before saying, “Kaito, I… wish I had done more. That I had made more of an effort to remind you of your worth. I did think you had value… I was horrified, that day when you… well, the culmination of everything Tengan had been putting together. I could have shown you your worth more consistently. I didn’t have to treat you lesser, always, just because of the things that happened in the studies. I knew it was wrong. I just felt like I had permission to treat you badly, and so I did.”

Kaito winced at that. Boy, did that sound familiar…

Byakuya sighed. “I’m sorry I never worked with you. That things just went from me hurting you, to me trying to ‘save’ you without your input, or even really your care in mind. I just decided one day that I could make your decisions for you, to the point where you ran from me. You didn’t deserve to be treated like that. You had done nothing to earn it.”

Kaito took a shuddering breath, nodding. Right… he had left Byakuya. Before he had gone to Dicea. He had gotten his apartment to escape the castle. To escape Byakuya’s reach. Because even before anyone had convinced Kaito their relationship was abusive, he had known. He had known he hadn’t deserved it. He had tried to save himself. Byakuya hadn’t been in the right, for everything that had happened after the sessions had stopped. He had saved him from Tengan, and then had become his own unique nightmare in Kaito’s life. Kaito had tried to escape him… Byakuya should be sorry.

“Say sorry for Chad too,” Kaito whispered, “And Hifumi. That wasn’t fair. You had no right to my private life. Say sorry for Togami. I don’t care if he was his own problem. You made me feel so gross and stupid and mindless…I wasn’t some horny fucking animal. I was out there trying to make relationships and enjoy myself and making my own connections and mistakes, you had no right to try to control or shame me.”

Byakuya nodded. “I felt responsible for how you turned out. I was embarrassed. Every time you got caught in some sort of scandal, I thought it was my fault, and that made me ashamed, and I took that shame out on you. And maybe some of that was true, but… I shouldn’t have humiliated you, for enjoying other people’s company. I didn’t have a right to do that, even if maybe I was the reason you turned out like that. There was nothing wrong with that. I’m sorry I made you feel like there was.”

With that, Byakuya bowed his head, placing it down on the floor. Just waiting.

Kaito looked to Tengan next. “Would an apology actually help you?” Tengan asked, doubtful. “Is there anything that could give closure to what I did to you? All the things you suspect I did? That pollen that was already long dormant in your system? Dreams filled with uncomfortable images, a sex drive that felt like it started too young, laughing and talking to voices in the air and rage that you couldn’t control, ooooh so similar to how you felt when the pollen was back… but also so familiar to the rage you felt when you were simply angry and wanted to punch walls? You’ll never really know which parts of you are me and which parts are you. Can anything I say change that?”

“No,” Kaito whispered, “Say it anyway.”

“Alright. I’m sorry you were stuck with a monster. I’m sorry I never showed you mercy, not even at the end. I’m sorry your husband had to chase me out of your mind not even a few months ago. I’m sorry I twisted and morphed you–”

Kaito reached out and slugged Tengan.

Glaring down at the man, who grunted as he tried to pick himself up from the floor, Kaito slammed his foot down on his neck. Snarling at him, “Say it properly.”

“Grk.. k’ough…” Tengan tried to talk, but couldn’t get through the crushing of his windpipe. Kaito relented, stepping back, and Tengan crawled himself back into his kneeling position, glaring at Kaito from the corner of his eyes as he rubbed his neck, before putting his hands back on the floor. “I did things that were horrific to you. Things no one can change. Things I can never apologize for, because there is no form of forgiveness you could offer me that would put these horrors to rest. And now I am dead. All I can ask is that you let this offense go. Show mercy to my memory. Absolve our history and move on.”

And Tengan put his head on the ground. Waiting.

“...” Kaito sighed. Letting out a shuddering breath… before looking warily to Kokichi. “...is this whole exercise pointless, if I don’t forgive them? I don’t… really feel forgiveness, right now. I just wanted to hear them admit it.”

As much as submission bows still looked so foreign to Kokichi…in the context of Kaito’s mind? The ‘wrongness’ there only came from the people. Not the act. And for that, it felt like something finally clicking. Maybe not being put to rest, but an act of gravity all the same. 

Byakuya’s apology was good. Kokichi’s intentions with Kaito’s greater knowledge and desires making something that sounded worthwhile. Almost genuine. Enough that…fuck. Kokichi really didn’t want Byakuya to ever contact their family again, but…one day? Something like this would be…acceptable.

Tengan…

Kokichi’s eyes narrowed, and he readied his water bottle, getting ready to put that memory back in its place…but Kaito had it handled. And for how much it had frightened Kaito before…Kokichi felt some satisfaction. His beatdown earlier was, admittedly, more of a physical release of anger, but…man, did Tengan deserve a good punch to the face. 

As Kaito looked to him, Kokichi got off his stool and approached, gently rubbing a hand down Kaito’s arm. “...does it feel pointless? Like nothing happened?”

“No. It doesn’t feel pointless. If you mean all of this,” Kaito said, gesturing to the two waiting figments, “It… maybe this won’t make any sense, from an outside perspective, but it kinda reminded me that I do have things to be upset with them about. I know that sounds insane, because that seems so obvious to you and sometimes I’ll say the right things… but I rarely feel it? My feelings for all of this stuff usually reflect how things were when I first entered the room. Everything was calm and normal and understandable, and I was just this… big, blundering idiot who was about to come in and make it worse, and it was going to be my own damn fault…”

“...it’s hard not to look at all the things that happened to me and not feel like it was my own fault,” Kaito explained, reaching across his stomach and placing a hand on Kokichi’s, squeezing the hand petting his arm for a moment before letting go, sighing as he ran a hand over his face. “Thinking about why they should apologize reminds me that these weren't two smart, powerful people who were totally fine and normal right up until my, like, corrupting presence showed up. I didn’t make them like this. I didn’t make these situations happen. It was them. And… they should be sorry. Not me. Not for this.”

“They hurt me, they did it on purpose, and it wasn’t for a good enough reason. None of the reasons I invented or were given were good enough either. They should be sorry. I’m not wrong to feel that way.” Kaito frowned. “That’s… just a true thing. I didn’t invent that. They should be sorry.”

“...and I don’t want to forget that,” Kaito said, “I don’t want to forgive them.”

“If it doesn’t feel pointless, then it wasn’t,” Kokichi nodded, smiling softly. Even if Kaito hadn’t really gotten anything out of this, Kokichi would still hesitate to call it a waste of time, because at least then they’d know that something like this wasn’t helpful…but the fact that he had? That’s all they had hoped for, really.

It wasn’t quite pity, but Kokichi still looked up at his husband with a sort of sad regret, hearing Kaito say that…he sometimes felt like everything had been his fault. That Tengan and Byakuya hadn’t really done anything. That it was his own fault that they had been monstrous and cruel. It wasn’t Kaito’s fault for feeling that way, but…it sucked. And even if they talked about it for weeks and weeks of therapy sessions and just quiet talks at home, if it never changed his feelings…

But it did change. And slow progress was still progress. And something like this…

“They should be sorry,” Kokichi agreed, “And you don’t have to forgive them. But…you do deserve to find peace with yourself one day.” Gently, he looped his arms around Kaito and pulled him into a hug. “...thinking about all that…I think is gonna help during our next appointment, which is why we tried this out, right? So we can talk about this, and work together so you can find that peace. So…I’m willing to call this a pretty resounding success.”

He hugged Kaito tighter for a moment. “...I’m sorry for scaring you. I have my own issues to work out, but…I shouldn’t force the explosions of ‘em on you. I should’ve at least asked if it was alright before I punched him.”

“Hah.” Kaito grinned, hugging Kokichi back, feeling lighter with his husband’s attention. He always did. “You did way more than punch him, babe. That was so scary. I mean, don’t get me wrong, once the sting of it has died down and I’m reflecting on it in the future, that’s gonna be sexy as all hell. But in the moment…”

Kaito shrugged. “It just felt like my fault. Like I had broken something in you. I hate that things that have happened to me reflect so strongly in you. I hate that one of the worst things that ever happened to you happened because of him.” Kaito scowled, glancing over at Tengan, who hadn’t moved. Both of the figments frozen, Kaito uninterested in continuing the daydream past this point. “I hate how he managed to hurt you in the five fucking seconds he knew you… and I hate how angry Byakuya makes you. You’re my good, sweet husband, and I brought these terrible people into your life, the kind that makes you want to beat a guy with his own cane…”

“...which was very cool,” Kaito admitted, “I just hated that it was happening. I felt so bad, bringing you something that made you act like that. I wish you never had to deal with it.”

Kokichi gave Kaito a sheepish grin. “Then you know how I feel. I wish you never had to deal with them either.”

Getting on his toes, Kokichi kissed Kaito’s cheek. “...I don’t really want to beat him. I feel more okay in the mindscape, against memories, ‘cause I know it won’t actually hurt anyone. But as much as I hate him…and, yeah, maybe it would’ve been satisfying to see someone get a punch in, I’d hate seeing someone actually break him down. You haven’t broken anything in me…okay? I just love you, so I’m not very fond of the people that hurt you.”

“...if it would make you feel better…that’s not the first time I’ve hit a memory,” Kokichi gave Kaito a slightly guilty, sheepish look. “My father offered in real life, ‘cause it kinda came up in one of our conversations…but I couldn’t do it. But a memory of Aiichi did get some real stomped on toes. And a few doctors I knew as a kid had a table shoved into ‘em. And I gave Cedar a real gut-punch. …and I slapped your mom in front of Shuu-chan.” For the last one, he did give Kaito more of an apologetic look. 

Kaito gave Kokichi a blatantly startled look… before saying, “You threw a TABLE??”

Kaito seemed most impressed with this, and that was because he was. He had just never known this side of Kokichi before. If anything, he felt a little put out that it had taken this long to find out that Kokichi, at the very least in the realm of pure daydream, did have a vengeful side. It made his husband feel… more human. Touchable, in a way that sometimes his ethereal husband couldn’t be. Kokichi was sometimes on a pedestal that Kaito could only marvel at, and, well… stomping on an imaginary Aiichi’s toes made that pedestal a little less high in the heavens, out of Kaito’s reach.

“Oh, man, I’d have paid money to see you gut punch Cedar,” Kaito murmured, awe in his voice, before his face softened, “And my mom was a bad person in her own right. Especially if Shuichi was there? I could understand that. Honestly, maybe if you had done that, say… almost a year ago, back when she first died? I’d have felt different, but…”

Kaito shrugged, looking tired. “Of course I fucking would have. My parents had just died, I was grieving. It was a terrible time to grieve and Byakuya sure as hell went out of his way to make it even more impossible, but that didn’t change how I felt. I’m… sorry I hit Budd. I’m sorry I ruined the vacation and lost my temper and acted like a crazy person. I really am sorry for all of that… but.” Kaito huffed, rolling his eyes. “I shouldn’t have been out on vacation. I shouldn’t have gone to a beach or tried to start a new relationship or… or made it my responsibility to…” Kaito winced, looking away, upset to say it, “... to support you through things when I was falling apart. That… wasn’t fair. So I am sorry all of that happened. But it’s not like I can’t handle my emotions about it now. There’s a difference between my husbands getting mad and lashing out at an imaginary version of my mother who did some seriously awful shit to Shuichi, in private, a year later. Or however long later it was, it doesn’t matter, you did it privately and didn’t shove it in my face.”

“But a week?? Later?” Kaito frowned, “I’m mostly sorry because there’s no way Budd could have known. Who the fuck goes to a beach bar the weekend after his parents die violent deaths? I shouldn’t have been there to hear him say that. I’m sorry for how I reacted.”

“...... still shouldn’t have kidnapped you,” Kaito muttered, before sighing, “Sorry, all of this has just got me thinking about things I’m sorry for and things I resent. I really am sorry for acting like a lunatic that vacation…”

Kokichi sheepishly twirled some hair. “Well…I shoved a table. It had wheels on the legs… I mean, I could throw a table in my mind if I wanted, but my mind tends to be kinda practical if I’m not focusing. And it was a therapy suggestion for me too… Revisiting people who’ve hurt me, in a thought experiment, and just…expressing my anger in a way where I’m not hurting anyone else, you know? Part of learning to manage my emotions better.”

“...and I know some of that is still just keeping my anger to myself, which isn’t sustainable, but…it did feel a lot better. And some of it is stuff from so long ago that I…really only feel like I need to talk about it with Dr. Egami, ‘cause we bring it up on purpose, you know? But…I think I could talk about it with you guys in a healthy way if it came up. Cause I’ve processed it more.”

Kokichi knew he didn’t have to justify himself, really, but…he wanted to explain. His offer to do this for Kaito hadn’t come out of nowhere. 

…nor had Kaito’s feelings a year ago. 

Taking Kaito’s hand, Kokichi placed kisses against each of his fingers. “You weren’t acting like a lunatic…and I don’t blame you for what happened. For any of it. And I never have.”

“...but I should’ve realized how difficult things were on you, and how impossible it became to deal with them while…trying to go on vacation. And hold things together while all of us were falling apart in different ways. We should’ve stayed home, we should’ve waited to date Shuu-chan until he was in a better place personally, we should’ve gotten help…we should’ve been helped.”

“...but it’s like the boys, right?” Kokichi smiled weakly at Kaito. “It’s hard to see what’s the best thing to do when you’re in the thick of it. When you’re constantly trying to do damage control. When…you’re young and unprepared, and the people around you don’t notice the bigger picture.”

“We made a lot of mistakes…but we’re learning from them. And trying to use those lessons. And it’s not our faults for being young and making mistakes.”

Kaito smiled, Kokichi’s lips warm against his fingers. When his husband was done, Kaito squatted down, hugging around Kokichi’s chest, just wanting to lean on him a little… before standing up again, holding his hands as he listened.

“Thank you, Kokichi,” Kaito said, “Both for this, and for being patient with me, and being kind, and… for not punishing me when I begged you to. When I was convinced I deserved it for ruining your life. I thought it was so normal, for people to hurt you when you fucked up… I gave you so many opportunities. I peer pressured you. I got angry with you, and defensive, and confused… you never took it out on me. You never took advantage. Not once. Not because you could. Even when I was expecting you to.”

“You made mistakes. So did I. And we are learning… but you never, ever, became the person I kept waiting for you to be. To be them,” Kaito said, looking over to the men, though they were gone. At some point just vanished, once Kaito had lost interest in them. Just alone with Kokichi in the study. “And I know to you that seems obvious that you wouldn’t, but to me it felt inevitable that you would at least be tempted to… intimidate me, threaten me, fuck, even mock me. Even our Shuichi mocks me, and our Maki intimidates me, and I invite it and let them, but I don’t really like it… and I gave you a thousand chances and permission and invitations to do both.”

“And you never did,” Kaito whispered. “...thank you. Thank you for never treating me how I asked you to.”

“You’re welcome, my Kai-chan,” Kokichi whispered back, looking up at Kaito with complete adoration. Tracing his thumbs over Kaito’s knuckles. “My bright shining star. My best friend. I never wanted to be a person who’d hurt you. I haven’t always succeeded, but…I feel like trying counts for something. I never want you to feel lesser…you’re so much. And I love it. I want the whole world to be able to behold your light and warmth…even if there’s only a few you wanna show it to. Even if you asked me to…I never wanted to take any of it away from you.”

“...and I have to thank you in return,” Kokichi smiled wryly, knowing just how infuriatingly stereotypical this was for them. “I grew up always hearing that no one is obligated to stay in a situation they don’t like. And I grew up always watching people leave me. Not listening to me. I believed…not caring about me. No one had to stay…so I believed they’d always leave.”

“...and, god, how I pushed you away,” Kokichi’s smile dimmed. “How impossible I made things here for you. How I pushed your steel loyalty and sense of responsibility to their last threads… But you never left. Even when you wanted to. Even when that’s all I expected of you.”

“So thank you, Kai-chan, for staying. I hope we keep learning, and keep deserving each other as we grow. Because we know we’ll stay, and be kind, when we stumble.”

Kaito leaned down, holding his husband, swaying a little with him. “Please, like I could have ever left you. I’d have been miserable without you. My good Kokichi. My light of Dicea~”

Straightening up, Kaito laughed a little, tucking some of the hair out of his husband’s face. “Beautiful… alright. Alright! I think we accomplished what we’re gonna accomplish here,” Kaito said, looking around the study, “I came in, confronted Tengan and Byakuya, talked some things out, watched you beat an old man bloody, it’s been a good time! …oh! Oh!”

Kaito’s eyes suddenly widened, looking around the study. “...I wanna do one more thing.” 

He looked to the fireplace.

Kokichi pressed into the hold, holding Kaito in turn as he just…basked in his husband’s presence. He had been fully in it this entire time, of course, but…hey, he was human. Allow him to find comfort in the human projections he was used to. 

Following Kaito’s gaze to the fireplace, Kokichi smirked. Not even having to read Kaito’s emotions to know what he was thinking. “Time to burn this place down properly this time? You could probably carry a lot more firewood at a time, with these big, popping biceps,” Kokichi hummed, rubbing one said bicep, “But…let’s skip to the fun part.”

Suddenly, covering every surface were lengths and bits of firewood, scrunches of paper and starter between them. Kokichi looked up at Kaito expectantly, smiling with adoration. 

“Heck yeah! Aw, you’re the best babe!” Kaito said excitedly, looking around, practically hopping at his heels. “Aw, man, we can even stay and watch! Heehee~” 

Kaito giggled, hurrying over to the fireplace, looking it over, before hurrying back to the couch. Picking up one of the boxes, he put as many of the items that he had thrown around as he could quickly grab in his fists, dumping it in– some of the little papers that Kaito hadn’t been able to match together. Little rubber balls and marbles and one or two little metal jacks that he could still remember the press of them on his palm. The leash and the collar– before bringing them over to the fireplace and dumping the box in. 

Then, looking around for a flint and steel, Kaito found the little bar of steel, and then idly, brought out his meditation stone. It wouldn’t work like this in real life, but fuck it, Kaito was feeling sentimental and metaphorical. So he flicked, flicked, flick–

The fire caught. And it spread fast. Fast and smooth. Kaito took a few alarmed steps back, but… it wasn’t hot. Not really. ‘Warm’ was the best you could call it, as Kaito stepped back towards Kokichi, taking his hand as he watched the study light up in a bright, friendly orange glow. Kaito grinned as he watched the fire spread, burning up the bookstands. The couch. The ‘toys’. 

“...fucking die,” Kaito muttered, grinning with his canines, “I hate this fucking room. Always wanted to watch it burn.”

He squeezed Kokichi’s hand, their hair and clothes shifting in the waves of pleasant heat. “Thanks ‘Kichi.”

It had been a good thing that Kokichi had stopped Kaito when they were children. Destroying the room wouldn’t have stopped Tengan, and it likely would’ve made things worse for Kaito, not to mention all the people who could’ve potentially gotten hurt from a big fire. 

But in his mind? It was just like beating an old man with his cane. 

Kokichi watched the room burn with a sense of peace as he squeezed Kaito’s hand back, watching the flames grow around them. “You’re welcome, Kai-chan.”

-

“Okay!” Kaito said, clapping his hands together enthusiastically, wearing a white lab coat around his shoulders like a cape, along with large, overly intricate goggles. “It’s time to be daring! Adventurous! RISK TAKING!”

“We will not be taking any risks,” Shuichi said, idly reading over the instructions, just making sure he knew what they could expect. “That is literally why I have to supervise.”

“Where did you get these lab coats?” Arven asked, looking down at himself, his lab coat feeling a little snug around him. “Mine had candy in the pockets.”

“The med ward had tons of white lab coats, they won’t notice a few missing,” Kaito said dismissively, looking over the beakers pleasantly. “Everyone’s got their goggles on? You want to be prepared, Shuichi can go a little ‘mad scientist’ on us sometimes.”

“I am literally the person meant to keep things safe.” 

Doppio wasn’t…totally sure what he was doing there, but he wasn’t really sure what else he was going to do while Arven was doing his chemistry lab. And he supposed it could be interesting seeing what a school assignment looked like. So there he was, wearing a--slightly too long--lab coat and goggles that felt suctioned to his face as he did something harder than anything anyone else in the room was doing. 

Doppio had discovered the stool he was sitting on could spin. Apparently spinning around volatile chemicals was a safety hazard. So Doppio had to put his full power of resistance to the test. 

“...so…what are you supposed to do? Nothing’s meant to explode, right?” He peered semi curiously at the sealed containers of…chemicals, he supposed. “Are you gonna melt something? Mixing chemicals is good for that, in my experience.”

“I’m supposed to identify which chemicals are what, based on seeing how they interact  with each other,” Arven said, looking at the various jars and test tubes, “And then calculate how much is in each container before the reaction happens.”

“Easy!” Kaito shouted, thumping his hand against his fist. “Time to just start throwing shit together!”

“There’s a list of vials you’re recommended to put together first,” Shuichi said, pushing the paper towards them, “And Kaito, just let them do it themselves. We’re just meant to make sure they don’t dare each other to gargle it, or pour it in each other's eyes.”

“Eh? Awww. Fine,” Kaito sighed, sitting down… before peering curiously at the papers Arven was looking over. “...neeed any help–”

“Aceto? Grab the vials numbered 1 and 6,” Arven instructed, setting up the beaker. “We’re gonna see what happens.”

That seemed like a terrible thing to do with chemicals…but Doppio supposed it was different. It was like…a riddle someone purposefully set up. He figured Shuuichi knew what all the chemicals were, since…he figured Arven’s teacher knew what all the chemicals were, and it had likely been purposefully designed so they wouldn’t accidentally, say…make a toxic gas. Which was bizarrely easy to do when you were experimenting with chemicals, Doppio had found. 

…he wondered what would happen if he gargled--

“Oki doki,” Doppio hummed, leaning over to select the labeled vials. He got Number 1 first, uncorking it and handing it over to Arven, before getting 6 and handling it next, taking out the, like…middlemen, non-science steps, so Arven could focus wholly on his experiment! Being all helpful for him!

“Alright, so let’s pour it in and see what sort of effect it has–”

“Goggles!” Kaito said cheerfully, bringing down his goggles over his eyes, looking like an excited kid as he beamed at them. “Safety first!”

Arven huffed, but he brought down his goggles, feeling a bit cool with them on, actually. He wore goggles during his excavations, after all, and he had grown a fondness for them over the years… It helped that they were genuinely useful, as Arven was now able to peer closely as he poured in the fluids.

“...okay. Let’s compare this to the cheat sheet,” Arven said, bringing over the paper Shuichi had passed back to him, looking at the cross references. “Okay… so, a few different mixes make that fizzing reaction. But, if we now know these two will fizzle with at least one reaction, we can narrow it down what they are by seeing how these same chemicals react to other stuff.”

“Oh, I did wonder why you didn’t just pour them all in at once,” Kaito said, “That explains it. Great job, Arven!”

“Aren’t you some big, like, space nerd or something?” Arven said, “Aren’t you good at science then?”

“I am better at emotional support!” Kaito sorta lied. He was great at science. But Shuichi was right, he wasn’t supposed to just do the homework for them. He was going to dutifully blunder his way through, being awed and amazed the entire time.

Plus, he was hoping to draw Doppio into the ‘festivities’-- maybe whet his appetite for education– as he asked, “So! What other reactions would narrow it down then? What are we looking for?”

“Um, we have to be careful to put only a specific amount for the next possible reaction. But,” Arven frowned, looking at the cheat sheet, “The professor thought it would be cute to put it into formula format, rather than just telling us straight out. I’ll come back to the formulas, that’s going to take me time. I’ll just go through the easy stuff first.” Arven pushed the sheet of paper aside– towards Doppio– before picking up more vials, looking for certain colors.

As the beaker fizzed, Doppio gave it a mildly nervous look…but that’s all it did. Just bubbling for a few seconds, and not even coming close to overflowing the beaker. So…it was kinda cool! In a very safe, contained environment. He’d probably still worry if something started to fizz while he was cleaning. Not so much with cooking, ‘cause a lot of stuff did that, and Doppio had never made literal poison just by combining foods before. Just kinda gross stuff. 

Doppio nodded, understanding Arven’s deductive process, and…it did sound a bit more efficient than trying out every possible combination. Trying 15 pours would…probably not leave them with much of the original chemicals left. 

…but that option was still better than… Doppio raised an eyebrow at Kaito. “No, Prince Kokichi said you were really good at space stuff. And you were talking about, like, the color of galaxies ‘n stuff. I think you just suck at chemistry.”

Shaking his head a little at Kaito Nonsense, Doppio peeked over at the sheet Arven had kinda slid in front of him, before he hummed. “Are you sure? It might be easier to identify one chemical first so you can take it out of contention… I mean, it says to add in 10 ml and 13 ml, for the next part?”

Arven blinked, glancing over at the sheet with Doppio. “Where did you see that? Did I miss the answers listed somewhere?”

…Kaito beamed. Catching Shuichi’s eye, before pointing a little at them, looking absolutely thrilled with what he was seeing. Look, look! They were doing schoolwork together! 

Shuichi smiled warmly. It was cute. 

Doppio blinked up at Arven before pointing to the formulas that Arven had mentioned before. “Uh, no? But…these are just 10 and 13. 13 isn’t divisible any smaller than it is, so according to the chart here, that’s the smallest proportion you can use, then to keep the right ratio you have to use ten of the other. It just…says it?”

Arven blinked again, before giving Doppio a pen. “Write that down for me. And, uh, all the other formulas too. Thanks.”

“Arven, shouldn’t you at least try to do a few yourself?” Shuichi sighed. 

“Nah! He’s doing social resource management! Delegating!” Kaito said, pumping his fist into the air. “That’s how I got through school! It’s a totally valid type of learning!”

“Cheating off my answers is not a ‘type’ of learning, Kaito…”

“They gave me the degree it totally counts!!”

Shrugging, Doppio took the pen. “Sure.” And as he started he just gave the adults an exasperated look. Weirdos. “This is way easier than inventory or wage spreadsheets. With this you can tell that they started with an answer they want you to have, then made nonsense around it, like a puzzle. You can tell right away if you’re doing something wrong if you get a wack-ass answer--I don’t think there’s much practicality to them at all. It’s just busywork.”

“Shuichiiiiii~” Kaito keened, eyes sparkling, “Do you hear that? He’s so smaaaart~”

Arven was pretty impressed too, honestly. He was ‘okay’ at math, but he couldn’t do it off the top of his head like that. Still, he kept working on mixing and matching vials, watching colors change and sniffing one– mmmm, yep, grape smell– jotting down notes that more and more narrowed down the vials and–

“Okay. So, here’s some of my guesses. If these are right, the rest can be narrowed down by process of elimination,” Arven said, passing the page to Shuichi.

Shuichi glanced through it once, before nodding. “Good job. You got that done quickly too, only forty minutes. Alright, now let me help you with proper disposal. Here’s the directions for how to do it, but I’ll walk you through it too.”

“You guys did great! And with your essay only needing one more round of edits, you’re gonna be more than caught up for school next week Arven!”

“It wasn’t that hard,” Arven said, though there was a small, proud smile on his face as he said it. “Lots of time ‘resting’ here.”

Doppio blushed lightly, but just gave Kaito a half-hearted shrug. He wasn’t that smart, really--just alright with math. He was just a fancy abacus, if you thought about it. 

…

…thinking about it…he was always the person to balance spreadsheets for Boss. And it wasn’t exactly for Passione, but he did all their household budgeting too, ‘cause…well, he was in charge of domestic things. …was that just another thing Boss had wanted, so he didn’t have to waste time on it? Was…everything Doppio was mildly skilled in just…something Boss didn’t want to do himself?

Doppio finished up the formula translations quickly, and went back to handing Arven vials mostly, and by the time they were done, Doppio had his arms crossed on the table they had been using, resting his head on top. Watching Arven with a fond smile as he was praised for getting on top of things. Which was praise-worthy! Even if they had found other things to do, they had spent a lot of time “resting” over the last day or so, and…Arven had gotten his schoolwork done. 

That was good. Doppio wanted him to be prepared for his return on Monday. Which…he’d walk him to, before going to his first proper therapy appointment. Busy days ahead…relatively. 

Tilting his head to the side, Doppio gave Kaito a considering look. “...I know you said the book reading stuff was my thank you gift, but I think I owe you for more than one thing still. …I can teach you how to cook something, if you want?”

Kaito hummed cheerfully– he had woken up in a great mood– as he said earnestly, “You’re not getting out of storytiiiime~”

“But!” Kaito said, nodding earnestly at Doppio, having to look around Shuichi and Arven, who were still cleaning up, “I’d love too! And if that makes you feel less indebted to me in some way, then perfect, I happily accept. Did you have anything in particular in mind, kid?”

“M not trying to…” Doppio sighed, before he nodded into his arms, fixing Kaito with an appraising look. “...I asked around. And I wanna teach you how to make a relatively quick steak dinner for your family. …i-if you…uh, don’t already know,” he finished with less confidence.

Picking his head up, Doppio gave Kaito a more nervous look. “I mean, it’s a pretty simple meal concept, and i-it’s not like you’re totally a beginner cook, but…I mean…it seemed… I just thought… Yeah. It could…be something for, like…a kinda special occasion? Like, more special than just getting dinner at the dining hall, but…less special than, like seven dishes or something that you spend all day cooking, b-but it’s still nice, and…yeah.”

“Aw, Doppio,” Kaito grinned, looking thrilled, “You sure? I don’t want to pressure you to cook meat if you’d rather cook something else… but. I would love to stuff my family full of steak! I’ve never had an opportunity to cook steak before! I wonder if Kokichi’s ever had steak before…?”

“I’m sure he has,” Shuichi said, “If you’re going to cook with Doppio, Arven, why don’t you and I just finish that essay you’re working on so you have nothing else to do this weekend. Leave them to it.”

“Oh, uh…” Arven looked to Doppio. Sort of wordlessly asking him what he thought of that. 

“W-wait, today?!” Doppio squeaked, looking between Shuuichi, Kaito, and Arven with a sort of startled jolt. “I-I mean I could, but I’d have to pick up the ingredients first, and, uh, I wasn’t, um, h-how many servings? L-like I could plan it for your whole family tonight but that might be a lot for trying to learn, uh??”

“Heck yeah! Market trip!” Kaito said, standing up excitedly, “Shuichi, tell yourself, Kokichi, Timothy, and Maki to make room for steaks tonight!”

“I don’t want a steak, Kaito, don’t make me a steak,” Shuichi said. “And maybe ask Kokichi if he wants a steak.”

“Fine! Maki and Tim would definitely want steaks, right?” Kaito mused, “And, like, maybe I could squish my finger on a steak, let Miya suckle it?”

“No. Veto.”

“One day my baby girl will get to enjoy a steak!” Kaito vowed, “Created and prepped and served by her devoted dad! Alright, we’ll find out if ‘Kichi wants a steak, and we’ll go get the supplies. Arven, you want a steak?”

“Yeah, I’d want a steak,” Arven said, “Can Chief have Shuichi’s steak?”

“Oh, uuuuuuh, yes? Sure, we can make the dog a steak… but he’s gotta split it with Chase.”

“Don’t be cheap, Kaito, just get both the dogs their own steaks,” Shuichi chastised.

Doppio gave Shuuichi a mildly surprised look. “Oh…do you not eat beef? S-sorry, I didn’t hear that any of you all were vegetarians, just that Prince Kokichi doesn’t really like pork, so… Hm.” Pulling out his notebook, Doppio started writing, drafting up a grocery list. “Should figure out a second main dish then…”

Okay, so that was steak for (potentially) five people and two dogs…better to get bigger cuts then just serve them sliced so they didn’t have to pay up for whole steaks that would end up with more waste… The sides he’d had in mind could be scaled up easily, so…what to make as a non-meat main…

Hm, he could do better than just giving the dogs raw meat too. And even if he did trust the butchers around Usott, it would probably be better for them health-wise too…

“Oh, uh,” he looked up at Shuuichi again, “Prince Kokichi said you liked spicy food? But…Kaito and Maki don’t. Does…Timothy?”

“Timothy’s got a bit better of a tongue for spices.” Kaito grinned, watching Doppio write fondly. “He basically grew up on the Dicea border. Border folk had more run-ins with spicy food. I’ve never seen him go out of his way for spice, but he doesn’t reject it either. Shuichi, Doppio’s trying to think of an alternative for you, what do you want?”

“Fish,” Shuichi said.

“Fish, really?” Kaito asked.

“I just don’t feel like eating anything ‘chewy’ today. I don’t have the patience to fight my food.” Shuichi huffed, “Steak is chewy.”

“I mean, well done steak maybe–”

“I don’t want a bloody steak, Kaito, make me a fish.”

“Doppio?” Kaito whispered, “Do you know how to cook a fish?”

Okay…so, two out of seven were spice averse, but it would be good to have the option for three…maybe not a straight half and half split for the pasta salad, but a decent portion could be set aside without any peppers in it, that wouldn’t be difficult at all. And the chimichurri outside of the salad was kind of self-serve, and…well, it wouldn’t be difficult to make a quick, herbed butter sauce to serve with the steak in its place, so…no major alterations for that…but…

Huh. Prince Shuuichi was…kind of fussy, wasn’t he. 

Giving Kaito a firm look, Doppio huffed. “Of course I know how to cook fish. A lot of different kinds. It’s no problem! Though, uh…” he deflated a little, “Okay, so it’s not gonna be as quick a meal. But it’ll still be good, promise. Do…you think anyone else would want fish too? I…suppose I could come up with an entirely new plan to make a more terra e mare focused meal…um. Would need a little more time, though…”

“A terror mare meal does sound very exciting, but I don’t think we’re supposed to be eating horses,” Kaito mused. “Come with me, we’ll go ask my husband what he wants, and beg for some funds while we’re at it. Maki and Tim aren’t really fish people, but we can ask Tim, I know he will eat fish. Come on, Doppio! We’re about to have a cooking day! This’ll be fun!” 

Heading over to his Shuichi– who was indeed very fussy– Kaito gave him a quick kiss, before saying, “I’m racing you upstairs.”

“You win.” Shuichi smirked, kissing him back. “Have fun with your cooking day.”

“I’ll finish my essay and then come give you backup,” Arven promised Doppio, “Don’t let him drive you crazy.”

Doppio gave Arven a grateful look. What he had tentatively planned as a quick lesson for Kaito as a thank you was…looking to be quite a lot more than that. 

…it’d been a while since he planned out a big meal like this. He was…kind of excited. And having a lot of people to feed, all with their own preferences… eue This was going to be fun. 

“I think that might be asking too much,” Doppio responded, giving Arven a grin, “So I’ll be counting on you to save me. Good luck with your essay.”

Making sure he had a good grip on his notebook, Doppio almost wasn’t surprised when Kaito whisked him away, neither of them having changed out of the lab coats and goggles. 

-

Kaito, after they had gotten everyone’s order, had tried to walk out of the castle with his coat and goggles. But Kirumi, spoilsport she was, stopped them at the door and took them, saying it was for the medical staff and Kaito couldn’t just ‘steal’ them, which Kaito thought was wildly unfair.

“Honestly, what do they think we’re going to do with them? Roll in the mud? Set them on fire? Never return? We literally live there, we were coming right back!” Kaito said, still lamenting being chastised by the housekeeper. “We end up in the medward often enough, we should get lab coats as, like… what’s the word… recompensation? Milestone reward? I’ve definitely earned a lab coat for frequent visitor studs! ‘Kichi too! Gonna get all three of us damn lab coats, practically live at the place!”

Glancing down at Doppio, Kaito grinned, “Soooo~ it’s been a few days with Arven now. You two still getting along?”

Doppio felt…mixed. The housekeeper, Kirumi, he’d learned, just oozed professionalism. It was cool. But she was a little…mean? About the lab coats? In honesty, Doppio had just forgotten he was wearing it, and didn’t really register Kaito’s, and he thought that was an understandable mistake…but maybe not. He always did think he was held to lower standards sometimes, at least when it came to screw ups, so…maybe in other professional settings it was…more competitive, about propriety. 

…he was kind of embarrassed. 

“...you…do live at the castle?” Doppio murmured, only half listening to Kaito’s rambling, but it seemed that was an awful place to tune back in. 

Turning pink, Doppio pouted up at the prince, giving him a suspicious look. “...obviously? We probably wouldn’t’ve asked to room together if we hated each other.”

Kaito chuckled, reaching over to pat Doppio’s back. “Yeah, yeah, smart-alec, go ahead and vent all that sass. It’s a really reasonable question! Being in each other's space almost all day and all night, every day, is a test of endurance for literally any relationship, you’re no exception. You can like someone all you like, even love someone, but you never know if you can live with them until you are.”

“And, believe it or not, Kokichi and I didn’t like each other much when I got assigned to his room… though, admittedly, we really sped-run the bonding process,” Kaito admitted, “Living together maybe made it a bit of a necessity honestly. And Shuichi sorta struggled when I first started treating him like a boyfriend rather than a best friend. The dynamic changes, ya know? Growing pains through that process is totally normal.”

“So I guess what I’m really saying is, any growing pains?” Kaito asked, “You guys gotten into any little tiffs yet?”

Doppio gave Kaito a skeptical look. Living together with someone was really easy. If you could figure out their schedule, you were golden! It was just, uh…a little… Well, living with Arven was different from living with The Boss, obviously, so there were…noticeable differences! And who was Doppio to say if they were…”better” or “worse” than each other.

…but he did spend less time cleaning his immediate living area, ‘cause Arven cleaned too, and…Arven never called out to him to come over while he was in the bathroom, and…well, okay, the kissing was very nice, but Doppio was glad he didn’t do that with Boss.

So?

“It’s been fine,” Doppio huffed. “Arven’s cool, so…of course I don’t have any issues with him. It’s…”

Doppio trailed off. About to open his mouth…before he blinked, an annoyed, stubborn expression crossing his face. “Wait, no, why am I even-- I’m not telling you this stuff any more, I’m gonna save it for therapy, if I feel like talking about it at all.”

“Oh?” Kaito said, processing what Doppio said before something a little sad, briefly, ran across his face… and then it was gone, Kaito grinning as he reached out to ruffle Doppio’s hair. “Eyyy! Oh, that’s awesome! So you really took to Dr. Mariah then, huh? That’s such a relief, honestly, she’s a really good therapist, if anyone could help you out with working out your feelings on things? Dr. Mariah’s a damn treasure, I’d seriously be lost without her. I knew you set up another session with her, didn’t realize how gung-ho about it you were though!”

Doppio huffed again. “She’s cool. I think I need her help. But…mostly? She said she’d lose her job and credentials if she told anyone things I say in therapy, so, yanno, I consider that a pretty damn good incentive not to spout it off to everyone she passes by.”

He gave Kaito an irritated look. “Like some people.”

Kaito scratched the back of his head sheepishly. “Fair, fair, super fair. Oh, did she show you the pamphlet? I love the pamphlet, but I know a lot of that info can be a little overwhelming all at once. We can go through it together if you want, I’ve studied it pretty hard now. Dr. Mariah is incredibly trustworthy, don’t get me wrong, but it can be good just to be familiar with what people are and aren’t allowed to do to you, generally.”

“But I’m glad you’re utilizing that resource! I was really skeptical about therapy personally, when I first got here. It’s not something we’re familiar with in Luminary, and kinda the closest thing we have as a comparison is something called ‘conditioning’? I mean, purely theoretically they’re close, in reality they’re entirely different things,” Kaito mused, eyeing the butchery, “This place, right?”

Doppio nodded, feeling a little (disappointed), before he hummed. “She gave me one, yeah. She said it was made to be easy to read, and when I took a look at it after the interview, I get that more, but it’s still, uh…a lot. Like I told her, I’m kinda just trusting Maki’s recommendation and…well, we talked about some stuff, so that’s why I agreed for the, yanno, whole thing,” Doppio gestured vaguely. “I guess it’s good to know, like, patients’ rights, but a lot of it is kinda beyond me… If something doesn’t seem right to me, I think I’d just leave.”

Glancing up at Kaito, Doppio squinted, giving him a confused look. “...by context, I’m guessing you don’t mean…like, shower products. So you mean more like…training?”

Shaking his head a little, Doppio made a negative noise, before pointing across the way and starting to lead Kaito there. “We’ll be back in a sec, but we should go to the fishmonger first, ‘cause I wanna see if they’ll filet something fresh.” He frowned a little, looking at all the people in the market. “...it’s a Friday, and later than I’d usually be, so they might be too busy…but it never hurts asking, and it’s worth it getting a fish that was whole that day, even if we won’t use the whole thing. And getting an expert to break it down will save us a lot of time and headache.”

Giving Kaito a slightly skeptical look, he asked, “Have you ever broken down a whole fish before?”

“Yeah, training, basically,” Kaito said, not exactly wanting to get into it, though he added, “I’ll explain it more someday, but it’s a lot for right now. I’d rather talk about you! Ah, alright, got it! Lead the way, little man!” Kaito followed Doppio past the shop, looking excited and eager just to be walking with him. 

Though, the flash of disappointment Kaito had seen on Doppio’s face was sticking with him, lingering on the back of his mind as he asked, “I don’t mind shopping around if they don’t have what you’re looking for. My partners agreed to let me have the afternoon for cooking stuff, so I’m in no hurry, I’m down for whatever we need to do.”

Though, at the question, Kaito snorted, “Kid? I have literally never even caught a fish. I’ve tried twice! The closest I’ve ever actually come to catching a fish is dreaming about it once, and another time I bought fish jerky which probably wasn’t actually fish jerky. Why, have you?”

Doppio rolled his eyes a little. Yeah, that sounded right. Kaito sure would rather talk about Doppio. Though he wore his irritation a little heavier at the new moniker Kaito decided to give him. “Don’t call me that. I’m literally as tall as Maki.”

…though she did seem…bigger than him. Just by how she carried herself. Even kneeling, she gave the impression that it’d take a once-in-a-lifetime storm to knock her down. 

Luckily for them, there was a break in customers as they got to the fishmonger’s counter, Doppio giving a wave and the woman there returning it with a bright smile. “Ah, there’s my favorite little chef! Haven’t seen you in a sec, Doppio; Boss declare some ban on seafood?”

“Ciao, baa-san,” Doppio greeted, before his smile got a little strained and he felt a cold line of sweat drip down his spine. “Uh, not…quite… Just been a little busy. Um, I’m working with a steamed dish, I’m thinking--do you have something fresh that’d work with…a sort of lemony-peppery profile? And if you’re not too busy, could I buy a third from you?”

“Always give me the hardballs, ko-chan,” the woman laughed, “Lemme take a look for ya!”

Looking back to Kaito, Doppio gave him a mildly dry look. “You don’t have to catch a fish yourself to break it down. You can buy whole ones pretty easily,” he nodded to the whole fish on ice in the containers in front of them, not to mention the whole mollusks and crustaceans. “I’ve never caught a fish myself either…that I know of. But I’ve broken down enough to know that it’s a pain and super gross and not something we have to compromise too much freshness to get something done for us here.”

Kaito radiated proud affection as he watched Doppio speak nicely to someone who was, well, not Arven. Look at that! Doppio was sociable! Look at him go! 

Grinning unabashedly at the teen, Kaito nodded. “I’ve never cooked a fish before. Never cooked steak either. Honestly mostly what I know is chicken and pastries. I tend to cook with my husbands in mind specifically, and what can I say? With the castle handling the main meals, usually the only thing I can really add of value is personalized desserts. So, even not being much of a sweets guy myself, I’m becoming really good at making sweets. Miyako will entirely have her daddy and dada to thank for dad knowing how to make all the good stuff.”

Kaito watched the fisherwoman fuss in the back, looking through things, his mind still idly spinning through that brief, disappointed look. Hmmmm…

“Hey, so…” Kaito peered upwards, swaying onto his toes, before thumping back hard onto his heels, whistling a little low, before saying, “You know, if there’s something you want to talk to me about? Or, maybe, if you have, like… things I need to answer for? Questions for me, about everything that’s happened between us this last week or so? You can… do that.” Kaito said, looking to Doppio, “Confrontation can be healthy. You’re allowed to ask for… closure, maybe. If you have things on your mind.”

Doppio could believe fish, but he gave Kaito a surprised look hearing that he’d never cooked steak before. From what he’d heard from the castle cooks and some of the housekeepers, Kaito was very much a meat guy. Always made sure to load up on veggies too, especially when it came to getting food for his family, and apparently some of his favorite castle dishes were sweet buns and tomato soup, but meat was kind of the foremost impression Doppio had gotten. It was why he’d settled on this dinner plan in the first place. 

Though, he supposed, you could really like a food but never cook it, even if you did cook yourself. …even more if you focused mostly on pastries. 

Doppio huffed a small laugh. “That’s weird… We’re kind of opposites, then. I’ve never had much of an opportunity to make many desserts--it’s something that I’m…um. Looking forward to, going forward. But I’ve made all kinds of savory dishes--all sorts of stuff in cookbooks, but some I’ve just heard about and tried to replicate.” He grimaced a bit. “...not as successful on those.”

“Alright, Doppio, how ‘bout this? Got something on special delivery today!” the fishmonger boasted, returning to the counter with a slightly bluish, silvery spotted fish. “Purple Rockcod! Folks say it’s one of the best for braising and steaming--fluffy texture, but a good, elegant punch of flavor!”

Looking over the fish, Doppio gave the older woman a sweet smile. “That sounds perfect, domo-domo. How much do I owe you for…?”

Negotiating the price, Doppio rocked back on his heels with a satisfied, smug feeling as the monger left to prepare the filet, pulling Kaito back since it was going to be a moment. Usually he’d pop into another stall during this time, but…well, it wasn’t going to be that long, and…

Doppio blinked at Kaito, giving him a bewildered, wary look. …Kaito…definitely didn’t know everything, not like Boss. So…how…?

(...it just…bothered him how Kaito could just…so easily brush off casually blabbering off everything Doppio had told him, when Doppio brought it up. Doppio probably would still be mad either way, but…Kaito could’ve at least tried to apologize! Even a ‘my bad’, or brief ‘sorry, kid’ would’ve been better! It was like he just… Like it was a given thing that nothing Doppio said would ever really be private. Like he…)

Crossing his arms over his chest, Doppio looked away, lips pouting through a frown, a bit. “I don’t think there’s anything worth talking about.”

“Ah, well, that’s also fair,” Kaito said, looking around the market now that Doppio had pulled them away from the stall. Hmmm… it really was crowded. Where could…

Kaito eyed a series of crates that had been stored by the side of one of the buildings surrounding the stall market, and pointing towards the crates, Kaito grinned. “Wanna sit on the roof a bit? I think we could make it to the top from those crates, do some people watching while we wait?”

Doppio looked over at the crates before grimacing. “...it really shouldn’t be that long… What if they fall over…?” But for all his grumbling, Doppio sighed and walked over to the side of the building, starting to appraise the best way to climb up. And one that wouldn’t end with him falling on his ass with a wooden crate soon to follow. 

Kaito beamed, cheerfully following Doppio to the crates, before without thinking about it much, he started to climb the crates, the path upwards feeling obvious to him. He was nowhere near Maki’s level, but Maki had still taught him enough about parkour that a pile of stacked crates and the brick mortar corners jutting out seemed like a pretty simple path up. Placing his foot on the jutting brick, it was a quick little hop up, catching the roof’s edge before pulling himself up.

He peeked back down, seeing how Doppio was doing.

Of course Kaito would make it up no problem. Sigh. Well, if everything could hold his weight…

Doppio started up, carefully testing the corners and lips of the crates as he made his way up. The edge of the roof was a little too far for him to reach just from the crates, so… Carefully, carefully, Doppio balanced on the same jut of brick Kaito had used, boosting himself up to catch the edge of the roof--

Gold eyes widened in panic as his fingertips fell just short. 

“Whoops, there we go,” Kaito said, mostly talking to himself as he quickly grabbed Doppio’s wrist, “Theeere we go, ally-oop! Up we go!” 

Pulling Doppio up over the edge, Kaito grabbed him by the armpit with his other hand, and with that leverage it was pretty easy to sit Doppio down on the edge, chuckling a little as he let go, settling in next to him as he peered at him. “You good? That was a good jump! You’re like half my size, so you had to put way more oomph into that than I did. You got really close, considering!”

“Nnngrahhh,” Doppio gurgled, scrambling up with Kaito’s help. …quite a bit of Kaito’s help; Doppio could admit that it was mostly Kaito taking on his weight, practically picking him up to place back down on the roof. But…either way… Not falling again! Doppio was done with that!

“I’m fine. Thanks.” Though, Doppio sighed, giving Kaito a dry look. “You don’t have to patronize me, though. I should’ve judged the distance better. …I usually am better at that,” he pouted, glancing over the side of the building in concern. “...must be out of practice…”

“Tsk, one of these days I’m gonna be allowed to gush over someone’s accomplishments and they’re not gonna just assume I’m full of shit.” Kaito sighed, shifting his gaze down to the crowd, bringing up his legs to sit cross legged on the edge, which let him rest his weight forward, putting his elbows on his knees as he looked down. “I’m sure you could have put more power into that jump if you needed to. I’m just also saying that it was a tough jump for you in the first place, tougher than mine. I admire that, how close you got when you had to work harder than I did.”

“Spend a lot of time on rooftops though?” Kaito asked, genuinely curious, “Enough to have gotten out of the habit?”

“Maybe don’t sound like you’re talking to a,” almost in grim humor, though it really wasn’t all that dark, Doppio’s lips twitched a smile, “2-year-old when you’re gushing, then.”

Sighing, Doppio tucked some hair behind an ear as he looked down at the market, eyes already tracing possible routes for them to get the remaining ingredients. …and getting a little distracted, watching the rock doves on the building opposite them. “Not a lot a lot…”

“Sometimes had to, though. There are some nice views… Arven and I talked about it, once. We were gonna be all touristy checking out some city’s industrial district, the next place we came to. He said that was the kind of place he’d never really spent much time so…I could give tips on likely places to see cool stuff there, kinda in return for him showing me the cool natural stuff we were gonna go see.”

Doppio glanced over at Kaito, giving him a testy look. “...we’re still gonna do that stuff. Go see the cool underground hot springs, and all.” His eyes went a little half-lidded as he looked back out at the market, voice softening. “...just not when we have a hit out on us…”

Kaito shot Doppio a curious look at that, before smirking a little. “What? You think I don’t approve?”

Doppio grimaced. “...you literally followed us, like, two cities over to stop us doing exactly that. And you’re always weird about us spending time alone together.”

“Ah, geez.” Kaito blew a little puff of air into the air, before rubbing his hand over his face, rubbing his eyes a little as he asked, “Is that why you think I dragged you back here? To not let you and Arven run off into some happily ever after together?”

Pouting, Doppio huffed. “Partly. You think we need supervision to do exactly what we’ve been doing this whole time, though it wasn’t until you got involved that everything started going to shit. I…”

With a small sigh, Doppio’s face fell as he looked away. “...I know we…would’ve been in a lot of trouble, if you and the others hadn’t come after us. So I’m not… I-I’m not saying that we would’ve been fine…but you didn’t know that when you came after us. So it was just because you’re a shitty busybody that can’t bear to let someone else help us out, your god forbid let us help each other out, so you had to intervene personally.”

Kaito frowned, considering all of that… before shooting Doppio a genuinely hard look. “Let who help you out? Was there someone else who was gonna help you out? Because on my end, it looked like two teenagers without anyone helping them out. And two people trying to keep each other’s heads above water when they’re both sinking isn’t a decent alternative, Doppio.”

Doppio returned the look. “We weren’t sinking. A-Arven said he knew places that…” For a moment, Doppio looked genuinely alarmed, paling a bit as he stuttered out, “Th-that even Boss wouldn’t know a-about, s-so… S-so that solved that whole problem that y-you caused and…with me there…” Doppio’s voice softened again. “...Arven wouldn’t be alone.”

Kaito sighed, resting his chin in his hand. The problem he had caused, huh… “It’s not just about being isolated, Doppio, that wasn’t Arven’s only problem. He’s not ready to be some lost hermit in the woods. It’s not good for him. He deserves someone taking a personal interest in him, in his safety, in his growth. He needed an adult so he could try stupid kid shit without getting actually hurt… like trying to run off to go be a hermit in the woods. That shouldn’t be a consequence he actually just has to deal with on his own.”

Rubbing his fingers through the nape of his neck, Kaito smoothed out the tense muscle there, before saying, “You’re really pissed I told, huh?”

…he didn’t like hearing about how Arven had climbed a mountain with a broken foot. How when Chief first started getting sick, Arven had just…been on his own. How he’d had to bank on hypothetical magic herbs to save the steadiest presence in his life. It was incredible that Arven had succeeded, and Chief was okay, and more knowledge about those herbs could probably help a lot of people…

…but Doppio wished that Arven hadn’t had to do it alone. That he’d had back-up and…enough security that he could’ve…actually taken the time to get care for his own injuries before starting up again. Doppio didn’t know if a parent could really…do those things. But just someone…

Someone looking out for him. Like Doppio had had. 

Clenching his jaw, Doppio gave Kaito a sharp look. “You might have to be more specific with that. Since I have so many options to be pissed with.”

“Ooookay,” Kaito said, letting one leg hang off the edge as he shifted his butt to face Doppio more, looking at him head on. “Let’s start with the shittiest one, and move our way upward. The absolute, one hundred percent, worst fucking thing I did to you, no question.”

Kaito hesitated, a real shock of shame running through him… before he steeled himself. “...I shouldn’t have let Arven hear about you being suicidal. I should have kicked him out of the room when my husbands wanted to talk to you about it. That was fucking… I don’t know what I was thinking. I should have never let that happen. I’m sorry.”

Doppio leveled a hard glare on Kaito, his scowl curling a bit. “Your husbands might’ve wanted to talk to me about it--which I don’t appreciate you telling them either, by the way--but them saying things like, ‘we notice you’re having a hard time’ is, like…yeah! Whatever! That’s obvious to fucking everyone!”

“But you were the one to bring up specific things I told you in confidence,” Doppio growled, before his voice quieted. Not less cutting and angry, but now markedly more hurt, as his lips shook a bit. “You might’ve not brought up what we talked about in that basement, but you fucking meant to, and you just fucked it up. The, the other stuff?! S-sure, maybe that’s on me for just…a-assuming that anything personal of mine could ever be respected.”

Doppio’s breath softly hiccuped. “...but I told you never to tell Arven that I…I-I had thoughts like that! Y-you can’t just think that always kicking him out of the rooms you decide to bring in your stupid talks is a good solution! I told you, specifically, that I didn’t want you telling him…and you just…fucking did anyway. Just like with everything else.”

Swiping violently at his eyes, Doppio huffed, before turning away from Kaito a bit. “...it’s just…fucking my fault… Should’ve never told you anything after the first time. Or from the start at all. Should’ve been obvious! A-always needed Boss to make sure I wasn’t…tricked or t-taken advantage of…”

Kaito winced, feeling his heart sink a little. Yeah… that was all true. He had seriously fucked that up. Like, really seriously…

Though he snorted at that last line, and though Doppio wasn’t looking at him, Kaito gave him a dry look. “You weren’t tricked, or taken advantage of, and I doubt even your boss could possibly navigate conversations with me. Because, frankly, you have to account that I’m just… kinda a dumbass, sometimes. I didn’t give away your secret to Arven because that was ‘the plan’. I was just stupid. We were coming to talk to you about the things you said, because I was worried about you and my husbands both understand the sort of thing you were going through more than I do, and we all sat down and Arven was just… still there. And I didn’t know what they were going to say, I kinda assumed one of them would bring it up, since that’s why we were talking and… I’m sorry. I was dumb. Sometimes I’m dumb.”

“But that doesn’t mean you need that… fucking monster.” Kaito growled, “It just means you need someone better than me. Better than both of us. And that person is out there, and I’ll help you find them! But you needed to deal with my fucking stupid bullshit to get away from his, like, way worse bullshit first! I’m sorry, that’s just the trade! Only someone as big a dumbass as I can be would have kept pushing at this anyway! That’s just… how it had to happen.”

Doppio squeezed his eyes shut. “...then…stop being dumb. At least when I tell you something’s a secret. Stop constantly assuming what everyone else is doing and reacting to things that haven’t even happened! Then they’re just happening because you made them happen!”

Huffing, Doppio felt his stomach clench, and he brought up his legs a bit, curling into himself and wrapping his arms around his middle. Sweating as he listened to Kaito…just…

…how it had to happen, huh? At fate’s mercy… Which Boss had never…

“...please stop saying that…” Doppio murmured quietly. “He’s not a monster… I know I can’t go back to him, but…please stop.”

Looking up, Doppio pointed his gaze over the market rooftops, looking east. Wondering… “...h-have the… Have people talked to him yet? …is he okay?”

Kaito frowned. Did he do that? He knew he tended to think if he didn’t do something, things weren’t going to happen at all, which was arguably him ‘making’ things happen, sure, but did he constantly assume people were reacting to things that hadn’t happened? Maybe he did… hmm…

Seeing the stress on Doppio’s face, Kaito sighed, nodding. “I know… sorry.”

“I don’t know,” Kaito said honestly, looking back down at the people wandering around. “I’m not actually involved in any real way. Unless I go start harassing people about it, no one’s obligated to report to me what’s happening. And I haven’t wanted to harass anyone about it, because… I didn’t want to be put in a position where I might feel pressured to try to hide what was happening from you. I’m more concerned about you than I am about him.”

Kaito smiled a little, small and amused. He wasn’t entirely sure how to frame it, but he was almost certain him feeling that way meant Kokichi had won another little ideological battle between them. Ah well… “We can find out, if you want. Use my bullheadedness to get you something you want, if they wouldn’t just tell you if you asked. But… I don’t really recommend it. You shouldn’t give him opportunities to get into your head again.”

Maybe some other people would be mad about that, get on some moral high-horse about Kaito not truly caring if he wasn’t going to oversee every aspect of Doppio’s situation, if he was going to meddle as much as he was anyway…

But Doppio just let out a little sigh, nodding. “...thanks. For not wanting to lie to me…”

However, as he was given the opportunity to not be lied to and find out anyway…

Starting to gnaw on his lip, Doppio held onto his arms, starting to dig into his left through his sweater sleeve. Looking warily at the horizon. “...i-it’d…it’d be a bad idea to just…go see him myself, right? I…” Something darkened in Doppio’s eyes. “...I’m worthless to him now so…there’s no point…right? …he’d never claim me…” …who would want to be related to Doppio anyway? As much as he…he could even be related to anyone…

“Ah, geez…” Kaito sighed, staring at the sky. At least it was a nice, blue day. “...claim you for what, kid?”

Doppio’s jaw trembled and he buried himself further into his not-quite ball. Feeling sick and…sticky, like with tar, and disgusting and…and hopeful. But the worst kind of sick hope that a person could feel. Because…because Kaito was someone who might be able to advocate for Boss, but…he wouldn’t, because he hated him and…and it still wouldn’t matter if Boss never…

“...found out some stuff,” Doppio muttered, almost silently, feeling almost nauseous with each word. “...he…Boss… He…might be my dad.”

Oh, that was the worst. 

Kaito felt his jaw lock for a moment, before he rotated it, loosening it a bit. He felt the urge to say ‘I’m sorry’, but held back. 

“...hey, I know I don’t usually ask. And, frankly, I don’t wanna get into the habit,” Kaito admitted, “But can I pull you into a hug? Half hug?”

Doppio blinked. Twice. Before he let out a loud groan and covered his face. “UUUUUUUUGH, are you kidding me?! I did it again! Why do I just keep SAYING things?! AAAAAAARGHHHH!”

Rubbing his face furiously, Doppio eventually looked up, cheeks reddened by friction as he huffed. “You should get in the habit ‘cause it’s common courtesy. …but yeah.”

Doppio scooted over on the roof to make it easier for Kaito to reach--though he wouldn’t have an issue with that, damn giant--as he sighed. “...not like it matters? …but don’t tell anyone that either.”

“Sorry, man. I am very charismatic. If I didn’t spend so much time needing someone else to talk to, man, I’d know so many secrets from the castle staff by now.” Kaito laughed, wrapping his arms around Doppio and pulling him in, holding him tightly for a second before relaxing the hold, though not letting go. “And I won’t tell anyone. Though, I know me saying so doesn’t mean anything at this point. But I still won’t this time.”

“As for if you should go to see him…” Kaito closed his eyes. “...god, I understand why you want to. I really do. But at this point of things, I think it’d just hurt you.”

… Kaito opened his eyes, looking to Doppio as he kept one arm around his shoulders. “Why don’t you explain to me why he wouldn’t claim you.”

Doppio nodded sadly. It wasn’t just…everyone hammering into his head that Boss had hurt him, and that’s why he should stay away that made Doppio stay put. Or that helpless feeling that had overcome him when it sunk in that Kaito had really dragged him and Arven back, and the CPS agents had done that proper interview. …Boss just…wouldn’t want him back. Doppio had betrayed him and was a known quantity in the Dicean system now. And…who would want to be somewhere they weren’t wanted? That was just pointless pain…

…it didn’t keep Doppio from worrying, or having moments of…of a deep, gut-or-goo-scraping longing to just…leave and see Boss anyway…but it was enough to keep him from acting on those feelings. 

Wilting under Kaito’s arm, Doppio lowered his gaze to the roof’s gutters. Pretty clean… They must’ve gotten them cleaned recently. “...if…if we’re right about everything…then he knew the whole time. And so he just…” Doppio’s eyes squinted in pain. “...lied to me. For years. I felt… I felt dirty, and disgusting for even…tempting the thought. Like…even hypothetically thinking that i-if I had a father, then I’d want him to be kinda like Boss. And Boss… Our relationship was always professional. He never alluded to anything even remotely like…it could be beyond that. If he knew, and…went out of his way to lie to me then…”

“...then it’s because he never wanted me,” Doppio whispered, voice cracking. “And that’s just doubled-down now.”

“...Doppio, there’s nothing disgusting in wanting the only people in your life to love you,” Kaito said, staring off into the distance over Doppio’s head, “There’s nothing wrong with you, for wanting a father figure out of the man who was essentially raising you. That’s, fuck… it’s crazy to ask someone in that position to just ignore that. To ask someone to just logic their way out of feeling attached to your family, even if…”

Kaito sighed. He was ranting. Focus. 

“Even if they’re not very good to you. I get that. You’re allowed to feel that way,” Kaito said, leaning back and looking over Doppio, starting to fuss over him a little. Straightening his sweater, smoothing out his hair, before saying, “Your braids have come a little loose. I’m gonna re-twist them, okay? My old girlfriend Monique taught me how years ago, I can twist a pretty damn tight braid, but I know the looser types you like too.”

Doppio’s gaze darkened again. There was, when he thought he, at one point, had had other people in his life. When he’d thought that he ended up in his current life because he chose it. Not because that was…just what he had been made to do. Boss hadn’t been raising him, not like how Kaito was probably thinking. Doppio was just…there one day, and then the two of them had gotten to work. 

…part of Doppio felt ashamed, by how proud and wistful that thought made him. 

“...I miss him,” Doppio whispered. “I know Arven hates hearing it, but…I miss him so much… I can’t just pretend I don’t, like he told me to…”

Glancing over, Doppio gave Kaito a confused look. Never having heard someone call the process of braiding ‘twisting’. It seemed more like ‘weaving’ to him… “...you know how to do a Northern braid? I-I can just do it myself…” A little nervously, Doppio brought a hand up, trying to find where Kaito saw some hair coming loose. Probably not the main braid at the bottom, he could usually feel hair falling over his neck or ears if that happened…

“Yeah, but it’s easier if you let me do it. And, honestly? Otherwise I’m gonna twist my joints to pieces, right now. Here, see this?” Kaito said, showing Doppio his hand, bringing it up close to him, “See my knuckles? How, like, bulging and thick they look? That’s not bone, that’s just how inflamed they constantly are, because I make them work too hard. I like to pop them because my hands ache when they tense up, which they do when I’m stressed. You letting me braid your hair will keep me from twisting them more.”

Reaching over to pull Doppio’s braid over his shoulder, Kaito fiddled with the last knot, not undoing it, but clearly tempted, as he admitted, “And this conversation is stressful, because I understand where you’re coming from with all of this. You know how much I want to reassure you that, yeah, he’d claim you if you confronted him about it? That you deserve to be claimed? Cause you do…”

“But you deserve someone who wouldn’t need you calling them out to want to claim you as their kid in the first place,” Kaito said, still fussing with the knot, rolling it in his fingers, “You deserve someone who wants to love you, and isn’t forced to. And I hate even saying ‘forced’, because it’s not fair that that’s what it’d take… but it probably would be. It’d probably take a fight, and he still wouldn’t care about you the way you deserve.”

“Can I re-braid your hair?” Kaito asked again.

Doppio looked at Kaito’s hands, not really…having much of a frame of reference for how his knuckles looked, but…they did seem kinda thick, he guessed. He was tempted to suggest that Kaito ask Arven about stuff that would help the ache and inflammation but…if it was a stress thing, and not just a ‘body on its own’ thing? The best Titan Herbs out there probably wouldn’t be able to help much. 

But he did understand what Kaito meant, about keeping his hands busy during a stressful conversation and--

And. And. And Doppio had meant to listen, but…

With how thick and tightly woven the nine-strand braid was, just as the other braids moved away from his scalp, the loose bit of Doppio’s hair coming out of his scrunchie often gave the illusion that his hair was just neck-length, and he’d clipped it back. So…it was on the shorter side, and the main braid was pretty sturdy and…

And when Kaito moved the end of it, it, naturally, turned Doppio’s head away. 

And that was all it took for Doppio’s eyes to widen and his breath to catch in his chest, sounds becoming garbled in his head. 

A firm hand at the base of his braid. Holding his head in a certain position. For a moment, just a pause. Just a pause befơ̱͌̏̀̑͟ͅr̢̖̮̜̄̄͘͟ė͉̬̹̩̋͆͘

(It was barely a skip, maybe not even a second. Just a burst of panic.)

(Remembering the water that waited for him last time this happened.)

Tone turning up at the end. He’d been asked something. 

With a deep, desperate gasp, like Doppio had forgotten how to breathe, he stammered out, “I’msorrymsorryso-sorryI’m sorry-” His body instinctively going lax.

Kaito had seen Doppio’s head tilt to the left, but he had honestly thought the tilt had been mostly Doppio just accommodating Kaito’s fussing. He hadn’t pulled in a way that would force the scalp to move… had he? 

Kaito suddenly wasn’t certain what he had done, his whole body tensing in alarm as he let Doppio’s hair go, pulling his hands back like the braid had suddenly burned him. What had happened? Had he hurt him? Had he– “Oh, woah, hold on, I’ve got you.”

Doppio’s body, going lax as he struggled to catch his breath, had started tilting. This was not the place to be tilting, and as Kaito grabbed him, tilting him back towards Kaito, the breathing felt way more alarming as he felt Doppio trembling. 

“Hey, hey, hey,” Kaito whispered, resting Doppio against his chest, rubbing his back a little, vaguely worried how he was going to get Doppio down if this was something that wasn’t gonna ease on its own. Probably a panic attack, it’s fine if it’s a panic attack, just gotta get through panic attacks… “What’s happening, man? Can you talk? Try to talk me through this, why are we sorry?”

It felt like the bottom of his body was falling away, his skin already peeling from that that that that not him it wasn’t him he couldn’t it wasn’t but he felt it-- Doppio could feel arms around him, something sturdy and…and…he wasn’t being…thrown? Was he? He didn’t think he’d ever been picked up when when when when

A bit of drool fell from the corner of his mouth as Doppio choked on a breath, the whole ‘breathing’ thing not working out well… Though considering how he’d been actually suffocating lately, this was a pretty relaxed fit. 

Why was he sorry? Fuck. fuck. Fuck, answer, you should know what you’re doing wrong what what what what what…w…what was…he…doing? He couldn’t…

“Ng so-gy, sorry sorry, can’t…” He sucked in a breath, “D-do whatever you w-want, I’m sorry, c-can’t remember, p-please ‘ll work harder, sorrysrysooory…s…” A violent flinch went through his body as Doppio anticipated whatever…blow or throwing or drowning or…whatever awaited him after he admitted to his incompetence. 

Okay, the breathing wasn’t quickening, it was strangling. “Hey, you remember the arm trick I showed you? We’re gonna do the arm trick, but we gotta move back from the edge first. Okay… okay…” Kaito murmured, holding Doppio securely, bringing up his legs to scoot himself back…

Pulling Doppio onto his lap, Kaito braced himself, before bringing up his leg to spin himself. When this didn’t accidentally send him hurtling off the side, he took a relieved breath, getting up and sitting them down onto the main part of the roof. 

Grabbing Doppio’s arm, Kaito pulled it up, high enough to open up Doppio’s chest a little, listening to Doppio try to explain what was happening…

God, Kaito wanted to kill the fucker. 

He had no idea what ‘boss’ looked like, but Kaito sported idle daydreams of Doppio’s house catching on fire, the bastard stuck inside, hiding in the bathtub, fruitlessly hoping the water might stop him from burning, the smoke inhalation being too damn good for him… “I want you to breathe, Doppio. That’s all I want from you. Let’s take some deep breaths together, and after we can… we can figure everything else out when you calm down…”

Doppio barely registered Kaito moving them back on the roof, his body just continually tensing as he figured this movement would be it! And then going lax, remembering that he wasn’t supposed to fight it (and that being lax would help him avoid impact injury), but as a demand finally filtered through his head…

Breathe. 

His arm up, air filling his chest. His lungs stinging…but there. Aching, but present in the pain. 

“Hhh!” Doppio gasped, once, then twice, then…breathing out, then in, a little steadier… Until.

Doppio blinked. Feeling kind of…lightheaded. And…his chest hurt. And he was…

Kaito was… He was in Kaito’s lap. And Kaito was holding his arms up. And…

Coughing softly, Doppio’s arms shook in Kaito’s grasp, tired and, well, trying to wipe his face, ew, he could feel drool on his chin… Doppio blinked blearily around as he…panted? Why was he panting?

“...a-are we on a roof??”

“Yeah,” Kaito said softly, letting out a small breath of relief as he lowered Doppio’s arm onto his chest, staring at Doppio trying to jerk his shaking arms up to his face. Kaito brought up his sleeves, dabbing it at Doppio’s face. Not the first time he had to wipe someone’s face down for them… he hated it… the vulnerability… he hated this… Doppio looked so small…

“... I don’t care if you hate me for it,” Kaito said, staring at Doppio sadly, something… almost cold, in the expression. Steely. “That doesn’t matter, not in comparison to what you need. I am…” Kaito bared his teeth a little, wiping the sweat from Doppio’s forehead, “Never. Abandoning you. I don’t care if they’ll never let me claim you, or if you don’t want me. I am not letting anything hurt you. You are my responsibility. You are one of mine.”

Kaito smoothed Doppio’s hair out with a finger, letting some of the anger bleed out of him, able to hear himself. “...sorry. I know that’s a scary thing to hear. But I swear it anyway. I’m going to make certain you’re taken care of.”

As he caught his breath, Doppio just looked at Kaito uncertainly, not really…getting any of this. Why were they on a roof? Why was Kaito saying something like this? …well, c’mon, Aceto, you can use some of those deduction skills, and that one’s kind of a gimme. He…he’d just had a panic attack again, hadn’t he? The ache in his muscles and pounding in his chest were…obnoxiously identifiable, at this point. So…so seeing something like that, Kaito would say something so…weird. And assured. And…

Arms free again, even if Kaito had just wiped his face, Doppio did so again, just feeling…gross. …well, he knew where most of that was coming from, but…

…never being abandoned, huh?

“...I don’t think you’ve ever really seen me fight,” Doppio said softly, giving Kaito a solemn look. “...if you make being your responsibility unbearable, I’ll fight it. And there’ll be nothing you can do.”

“...but thank you anyway,” Doppio murmured, glancing away in embarrassment as he briefly pressed against one of Kaito’s shoulders to hug him. “...I’m assuming that extends to helping me get off this roof, in that thanks.”

Kaito chuckled a little weakly at that. “Ya know, sounds like a real ‘unstoppable object meets immovable wall’ situation. Let’s just try not to get to that point, yeah?”

Kaito lit up a little as Doppio pressed back into him. Small victories, especially in the face of what Doppio had just… said. In a haze. In a panicked, frightened haze… promising to work harder. Offering Kaito– or, well, let’s be honest, someone– whatever he wanted…

It broke Kaito’s heart. He wished he knew what to say. He wished he could… heh. Force ‘the boss’ to tell Doppio everything he deserved to hear. That he was sorry. That Doppio had done enough. That Doppio was valuable.

“Let’s get you down,” Kaito said, “When we get down, I want you to make a judgment call, see if you’re still up to buying supplies and cooking. It’s okay if the answer is no. I’m sure you’re tired, we can just go home.”

Doppio nodded, huffing a weak, tiny laugh. “Emphasis on the ‘let’s’? …I’ll try.”

…this sucked. This sucked a lot. Doppio had been saying it enough now, but…he hated this. Ever since Kaito had come barging into his life… Doppio couldn’t say that…that he’d never felt this way, before that. But at least the moments of cold dread and suffocating air were limited to the quiet hours when it was only him and the rising sun awake. Or in brief, solitary moments throwing up in an already dirtied back-alley before he’d pull himself back together, work to do. 

It wasn’t just…constantly. What felt like endless minutes in the middle of the day, leaving him feeling sore and weak and…useless. It wasn’t constant shame and anxiety following him around like a personal storm cloud. 

(...it wasn’t peeing his pants on a random rooftop while--)

Doppio’s eyes snapped open wide. They were getting ingredients to cook!

“Oh shoot! The fish has probably been ready for ages now…” Groaning in anxiety, Doppio scooted out of Kaito’s lap, looking around for the best way off the roof before he gave Kaito a firm look. “We promised dinner, and your family and Arven are getting dinner. And you’re gonna learn how to cook steak. …how much shopping have we done, yet?”

Kaito brought up a small bag tied to his wrist sheepishly. “We’ve bought some seasoning you wanted. And technically we bought that fish that’s waiting for us. That’s it.”

Kaito, before he got up, hugged Doppio again. He just wanted to. And after that, he got up, helping Doppio too. “Let’s let’s. Come on, I’m gonna hold your arms and lower you down until you can feel the top of the box on your feet. Don’t worry about me if I look like I’m gonna slip off, I have great core strength, I won’t fall.”

As he helped Doppio down, waiting for the go ahead to let go– half hanging on his waist over the edge, but like he said, it was fine– he pulled himself back up, before lowering himself onto the box as well. He kept an eye on Doppio as they climbed down, looking for signs of shakiness. When they got to the bottom, just in case, he offered, “I could always do the shopping and meet back with you at the castle…?”

Okay…okay. That was…not ideal, but sometimes that’s just how it went. Rest of the shopping trip, okay. 

While Doppio didn’t feel…great, and totally up to clambering around things, he, somehow, made it back to the ground in one piece, and not even banged up. And…honestly, if things had been different, he might’ve taken Kaito up on that offer. With no other factors, he just wanted to…

But, well, there always were, wasn’t there?

Huffing, Doppio gave Kaito a dry look as he led the way back to the fishmonger’s. “Part of the lesson is learning how to shop for the meal. I’d guess you probably would’ve bought a whole fish, if you tried on your own! And I don’t even wanna know what you’d ask the butcher on your own. And we haven’t even gotten to everything for the sides… I’m making sure you can make a reasonable weekday dinner for your family from scratch--that’s my lesson and that’s my gratitude.”

Kaito gave Doppio an openly puzzled look, following behind him dutifully. “I’d ask for the meats, right? Like… steaks, my good sir! On the double! Extra… raw?” Kaito mused, looking less certain. “It’d have to be extra raw, because when it’s cooked a little then it’s raw… so you’d have to ask for…” Kaito narrowed his eyes, suddenly saying with some concern, “...I hope the butcher doesn’t just… give me a cow? Butchers don’t just give you the whole animal, right? If I asked for just ‘a fish’ would they give me a live fish? Not gonna lie, if they give me a live fish, that fish is now my pet. I really want a pet fish, I don’t know why I haven’t committed to that yet, Shuichi has a snake and I still don’t have fish!”

Kaito blinked, realizing they were standing in front of the fish lady, as he admitted, “Wait, I lost track of the conversation, what are we talking about? Shit, can I buy a pet fish, miss?”

The look Doppio gave Kaito was just wholly condescending. The kind of look that he wished Arven was there for--other than just pretty much always wanting to hang out with Arven--just so he could double-up on that look with a ‘what did I tell you’ look. The kind of steak Doppio would be willing to give Kaito a pass on, because not specifying in his example could genuinely be just a Kaito-ism. Along with that weird, rude speech. But asking about the rawness…

This guy. This guy thought he could do meal shopping himself. 

Just tuning out his rambling for the most part once Kaito had demonstrated that he had no idea what he was talking about, Doppio made his exchange with the fishmonger, thanking her for the extra work and paying for the second half of it (adding in the extra coin he’d bargained down from as a tip for the work), and putting the wrapped filet in the cooler bag Kaito was carrying, all in the time it took Kaito to tune back in as well. 

Raising an eyebrow, the fishmonger gave an amused, hearty laugh. “Won’t have much connection with these, I’m afraid,” she nodded to the display of dead fish, “But if you wanted a clam or somethin’? Couldn’t stop you, once you pay.”

Groaning, Doppio huffed, his cheeks puffing a little. “Focus, Kaito. We’re here for a purpose!”

Kaito’s eyes widened with wonder. “...I can buy a clam?” he asked.

-

Fifteen minutes and a number of questions later, Kaito left happily holding a small bag filled with freshwater and two small clams inside of it. “What do you think I should name them? I think I’d like a pair of names that work together, ya know, something that relates to each other? Awwww, what about Doppio and Arven Jr’s!? That would be so cute!”

While he had given a number of exasperated sighs, Doppio couldn’t help glancing over curiously every few seconds at the two clams in Kaito’s bag. He couldn’t deny, they were pretty cute…

Fitting of better names than-- Doppio shot Kaito an annoyed look. “Hard pass on that. You’re gonna talk about them all the time and Arven and I will end up having to be Human Arven and H-...Human Doppio. I’m not letting that happen.” Huffing, Doppio tried to just…pretend that little hitch hadn’t happened. “What about…Ori and Chie? Those are cute names… And fit clams way better.”

“Ooooh, why Ori and Chie? Though, those are very cute.” And Kaito would likely pick them just because Doppio had offered names. He was so proud… he loved any moment Doppio sounded relaxed or happy or self-assured. Even if Kaito sometimes had to be the buzz kill for that self-assurance. It was still something he wanted Doppio to have in the long term. 

“...pffff. Shuichi and Maki are gonna make so much fun of me. These little guys live for ten years. I’m gonna be such a good clam dad. No one’s eating you little guys, not on my watch. No eaten pets today~” Kaito said cheerfully, peering into the bag, “Gonna have to get you guys a little aquarium. I wonder where I can keep them… oh! Maybe my shrine! The new one.” Kaito said, a tad smugly, “Not that I know about my super awesome birthday gift or anything. Heee~”

While he had initially said the names with confidence, Doppio turned a little red as they got to the butcher stall, a few people already being helped, but it didn’t look like it’d be too much of a wait. “Um, well… They have that smooth, curved shape, right? And they’re kinda yellow… There’s, uh, a pasta shape called orecchiette, that’s kinda the same shape, a-and the name means ‘little ears’, in Common, because of the shape… So, uh, if you kinda force names from that… Orecchiette. Ori. Chie.”

Doppio coughed softly as he finished, looking away in embarrassment. 

Though, he did give Kaito a curious look. “...there’s a very real chance I could be misremembering, but…didn’t you say it was tradition for Oumas to make rooms for their spouses? Why…would you need to not know that?”

“Awwwww, little Orechiettes! I love that! My little Orechiettes~” Kaito cooed, delighted with that, “That’s their names! Good job, Doppio, excellent naming skills! If my third child doesn’t show up with a name, I’m heading to you for ideas, so keep them fresh!”

“And yeah, it is~” Kaito grinned, looking swoony and starry eyed, “My ‘Kichi’s making me a room~ But, unfortunately, it was supposed to be a surprise.” 

Kaito rolled his eyes. “Then I had a breakdown about religion and Kokichi, like, half to make me feel better and I’m pretty sure half to give me a chance to say I didn’t want it told me he was building a temple in the castle. Or, well, not specifically a temple, it’ll be for any religion someday… but yeah! Castle Atuan shrine! My castle Atuan shrine!” Kaito keened, before laughing lightly, face reddening, “He loves me~”

“So, to kinda keep some of the ‘magic’ of the surprise, I try to talk a little bit like it’s still a surprise,” Kaito explained. “We all know I know, but it’s kinda fun pretending. I have no idea what it looks like yet! I’m trying not to let my imagination run too wild… anything he makes me I’ll love, it doesn’t have to be extravagant… I hope it’s nice.” Kaito whispered the last part, looking flustered and pleasantly embarrassed at the confession. “He looooooves me~ Don’t worry, Doppio, I’m sure someday Arven will make you a room too.”

Third child??? Were the princes expecting again???

Nodding along with the--he was sure, very condensed--story, Doppio hummed. He could see how it’d be awkward, at the very, very least if Prince Kokichi had made a whole shrine just…for Kaito to become an atheist or something. Probably funny on some level of irony, but…mostly sucky. 

But considering the rest of the castle? Doppio was sure…wait, hold on. 

Rolling his eyes a little at whatever hot-cold insinuations Kaito was making about him and Arven, Doppio gave Kaito a confused look. “Wait, hold on…sorry. You said ‘birthday gift’ as like…its own thing. Is it…just a gift that’s gonna be conveniently given on your birthday, or…?”

“...?” Kaito looked over at Doppio, reading his expression, trying to understand the question. “...no? I mean a gift my Kokichi’s giving me because it’s my birthday. Like, in celebration! Either of someone surviving another year, or how I like to think of it, a celebration of the person having lived at all! Just… celebrating!” Kaito grinned. “Ya know! Celebrating the person!”

“......did you?” Kaito asked, looking thoughtful now, “Know that?”

“Oh…” Doppio hummed, rolling the concept over in his head. Celebrating someone surviving another year, or just the fact that they were alive… That was pretty sweet, actually. Being alive was… 

Hard. Very difficult. Vulnerable to end at any moment. …special. Incredible. …worth celebrating, if he thought it over…

Doppio gave Kaito another confused look. “...no? Though, that seems like a cool idea. And your husband wants to celebrate through a gift? It…kinda seems like a lot, but…” Doppio snorted, smirking at Kaito, “So are you.”

No…

Kaito snorted, reaching over with a clam free hand to rub Doppio’s head. “Oh, I am, am I? You’re lucky I already know that, ya brat. Anyway, you’ll get a few tastes of birthdays, I’m sure, before we get to your birthday and celebrate our Doppio! That’s the main reason we gotta nail down exactly what date you want! We’ll have to sit down with a calendar soon, let you circle a date. And when we do? You gotta tell Kokichi your favorite food, he’s gonna want to know for your birthday, trust me.”

Making a disgruntled noise as Kaito messed up his hair, Doppio raised an eyebrow. “Prince Kokichi said he couldn’t cook, though. …oh! Is food a good birthday present?” He lit up, eyes widening as he came to a few realizations. “That’s something I can do! I, uh…can’t really commission a whole new room for anyone, but…I can cook! And that’s kinda…still in budget for me…”

Giving Kaito a stubborn look, Doppio demanded, “When’s your birthday?! …oh shoot, when’s Arven’s birthday?” Looking sincerely worried about it, Doppio fretted, “He said he was almost 16 when we met…I think. So that’s…soon! I should start planning… Arven’s life is definitely worth celebrating!”

“It is! We’ll ask Arven when his birthday is when we get home,” Kaito promised, “And food is a great birthday gift. We’ll do lots of nice things for his birthday… wait.” Kaito’s eyes widened. “I wonder if anyone’s ever thrown him a birthday party before… Or, I could take you boys somewhere nice? I took Timothy to a really nice fishing area for his birthday, and then thankfully, there was an archery range and a water park he actually wanted to go to there, so it was a great birthday overall! And then I’m pretty sure Kokichi taught him to do more shady, sneaky stuff, though no one will tell me exactly what. I swear, Kokichi is determined to make it more difficult for me to keep an eye on kids. It’s gonna be a full time job just keeping up with the latest sneaky bullshit he’s taught our Miyako.”

Especially sneaky mind bullshit. Phew. That was gonna be a whole thing.

Kaito looked fondly down at Doppio, as he said, “We’ll get him a nice gift he can open too. Something we can put in a box and put a bow on the box. It’s just nice, getting to open a gift.”

Okay. Food he could do. Doppio was the food guy! And Arven always loved his cooking, and always seemed really happy…so that was good, right? Though…he wanted to cook for Arven all the time, and Arven was a good cook in his own right, so…was that really a gift, if it was something normal? Maybe he could make something--oh, if Kokichi wanted to know his favorite foods, then… Arven said he had a soft spot for tofu balls. That was a start. 

Nodding absentmindedly with a stubborn look as Doppio tried to think of things that would adequately celebrate his boyfriend’s life, he gave Kaito an unsure look as he talked more about the sorts of things that made good birthday gifts. “...rooms--I guess that would be big gestures--, food, trips, and…like, budget-aware Unity gifts? I guess random presents like that can be nice…and if they aren’t random then…hm. Arven did really like the presents Prince Kokichi got him…”

“Rooms are kinda the wham-daddy of grand gestures, I’ll be honest, I was mostly teasing when I said that. Though, if you guys ever get a house together, decorating a room would be a super nice gesture, for a future idea! …far future,” Kaito said, looking seriously at Doppio. “You guys are too young to be getting a place together, that’s too serious a step. Faaaar future. No shenanigans, got it? Orechiettes will know,” Kaito threatened, bringing the clams up to ‘stare’ at Doppio.

Doppio gave Kaito a dry look, though it softened as he gave the clams a nod. “They certainly have the eyes for it…”

Sighing, he stretched out his neck a little. Everything was so sore… “...Arven offered for me to come live at his house. A few times,” Doppio admitted softly. Something a little sad in his eyes as he added, “Said he had the space.”

Though, a bit jarringly, it was their turn up at the counter, and flipping on his ‘professional’ mode, Doppio asked for four Delmon Strip steaks and three pounds of flank steak, politely pointing out certain steaks already out that looked perfect for the recipe, making small talk with the butcher and, of course, haggling a bit. 

Kaito had immediately opened up his purse bag when the butcher had named a price, pulling out coin, before uncertainly… putting it back when Doppio started to argue. Then pulling out the new price, before putting it back when the butcher started to argue. Looking somewhat haplessly between the two as numbers kept getting thrown around. Uuuuuuuh…?

Just as Kaito was desperately starting to consider just throwing his purse onto the counter, grabbing Doppio, and running, the kid and the butcher seemed to figure it out, and Kaito gratefully paid. “Phew. I just give people what they ask for. Didn’t think you could haggle in a place like that,” Kaito admitted, adjusting the cooler against the sling on his back. 

“And of course Arven asked you to move in with him. God, that kid has it bad. I bet he’s pushing for all sorts of things,” Kaito said, huffing a little. “Lonely kid with all the independence and resources in the world… oh yeah. I’ve got that kid pegged. Uh, pinned. Pegged?” Kaito frowned, squinting his eyes. “...I swear that’s the phrase, but saying it sounds weird about a teenager I’m trying to look after, sooooo pinned. I’ve got that kid pinned– damn, no that sounds weird too. Figured out! I’ve got him figured out dammit! He can’t escalate, even if he has every reason to want to, and no real roadblocks from doing so!”

Doppio had a satisfied little smile on his face as they left the butcher’s, heading for some vegetable stands now, before he snorted condescendingly at Kaito. “You can haggle almost anywhere, I’ve found. People want a fair price, but by the pound pricing leaves a lot of negotiation room if you’re buying in bulk, or in really small amounts, or if you ask for unusual things. Generally, it’s a better business call, for food or perishable product, to make a sale that you might’ve lost on, by the pound, than to have extra product that you can’t get rid of. …also, I think a lot of people just enjoy haggling.”

Though, as Doppio started looking around for the rest of the ingredients they needed--young broccoli, chickpeas, southern basil, small tomatoes (he’d already picked up herbs and aromatics the other day that they could use, and they’d have to pick up feta cheese and orzo at another place)--he flushed and gave Kaito an almost defensive look. “Arven isn’t pushing me into anything! He’s the person, like, the exact opposite of that, while I could call you pushy times a thousand! What’s your problem with him, you’re always being such a jerk…”

“I don’t have a problem with Arven, I want to look out for him!” Kaito insisted, tsking, “Look, I just recognize the personality traits I had at his age. Believe it or not, Doppio, I’m not being entirely baseless, and you two aren’t the first two teenagers who wanted to run away from a difficult homelife at 15 with their first boyfriend.”

“You get all… caught up. In love.” Kaito frowned, his eyes far away. “He becomes your whole world, and you just… love him so much that you get too excited, and you start upping the ante, deciding you need to do more and more things to be closer and closer to him, and maybe it’s things that in retrospect you weren’t ready for yet, and it kinda messes you up for a long time… make stupid little black books full of names because maybe you weren’t good enough for him, and if you weren’t, well, so what! He wasn’t good enough for you either! Screw you, Togami!”

“...ahem,” Kaito coughed, “Anyone, it’s not a one for one situation, but I still wish people had been paying more attention, when I was 15. I’d have maybe made less stupid decisions. I can’t stop you guys from doing anything, but I can at least pay attention.”

“You do,” Doppio insisted. “You and Maki are always yelling at him, and…well, I think Prince Shuuichi is just the kind of person that likes messing with people, so I’m not counting him, but…but you’re always trying to have conversations around him too, like it doesn’t even matter he’s there, and you always accuse him for everything! Like you don’t even consider it’s me, you just blame him!”

Actually starting to get legitimately angry about it, Doppio fumed, “It’s not about running away. He asked me to live with him, and I said no! When he suggested running, I said yes, because the alternative was dying, and he was trying to save my life! He’s been nothing but considerate to me, even though I put way too much bullshit on him, and all you do is treat him like…like you’re already convinced he’s done a crime, and you’re just trying to prove it backwards!”

At the same time, Kaito seemed to get caught up in his own fervor, and…well, if nothing else, it was jarring and confusing enough for Doppio to calm down a little. “...our situation isn’t like yours. It…” Doppio sighed, conceding, “...it’s good that…we have someone to rely on. That someone’s paying attention to him… But, fuck, Kaito? Could you try to have ‘attention’ mean more than constantly criticizing him? Even…”

Almost full-body cringing, Doppio scrunched his eyes before spitting out, “Even Boss made sure to tell me I was doing a good job, and that I was important. If he’s the model of a monster to you…then do better than that.”

Was Kaito being too harsh on Arven, and not enough on Doppio? Like… maybe. Maybe Doppio just made Kaito think of his Kokichi a lot, and Arven maybe reminded him a little too much of himself…

Whatever thought process Kaito had came to a screeching, gasping halt, as Doppio compared him to his boss… before he frowned. “...what. I don’t compliment Arven?”

“Not enough,” Doppio huffed, picking out stalks of young broccoli. “Even with that fake-sounding way you do it. …he deserves more. And not just doing it in calm moments, but disregarding him when things are tense. I’m not saying take a five minute break to fawn over him, but…stop yelling at him. He’s done nothing to deserve it, and has gone above and beyond just…deserving some basic courtesy.”

Doppio huffed again. They still had another stop to go but…hoo. He, uh… The wind of feeling purposeful was, uh…starting to not be enough to just power through…everything. …ugh…and he was getting a headache on top of it… 

Kaito pouted a little. Was he doing that? He didn’t want to be doing that. Maybe that was why Arven was always so damn aggressive with him…

Noticing Doppio flagging though, Kaito put a hand on his shoulder. “Hey, you want to take a seat for a little bit? Catch your second wind? Or you can rest, tell me the last thing we need and I’ll go grab it for ya.”

Paying for the vegetables, Doppio shook his head a little, giving Kaito a hard look, though it was notably more strained than the determined one from earlier. “Just one last thing, but…” Grimacing through his shame, Doppio looked down. “...we’d still have time… It’d be early anyway if we started cooking right away, so… When we get back, could…you put the groceries in an ice box and…leave me alone for a bit? I think I wanna…”

Take a shower and throw up. 

“...take a nap or something…”

“Of course, Doppio, we’ve been out a while already and you had that scare on the roof… Alright, let’s get the last ingredient, and then head back. Do you want to lean on me a little? You just seem a little worn out.”

Doppio just looked at Kaito for a moment before sighing. “I’m fine. I’ll be good for one more place and the walk back. Let’s just go.”

Kaito gave Doppio a concerned look, before nodding, adjusting the pack on his back, the groceries on his arm, and checking on his little clam guys, now securely tied to his belt. “Alright, if you’re sure. Lead the way, but we can always take a break if you need it, we have plenty of time.”

“...seriously?” 

Sighing, Doppio didn’t quite have it in him to muster his outrage again so soon, but he did give Kaito an annoyed look. “...I’ve had a shitty day, I’m physically compromised, but when offered aid that I refuse, you just sympathize and let me know it’s there.” Glaring a little more, he continued, “When that happened to Arven, you yelled at him for being difficult, almost threw him on Lake, and forced him into a custom we don’t even follow. You didn’t ask him shit, or pose anything like a question even if it’s fake. Do you seriously not see the difference there?”

“...eh?” Kaito said, giving Doppio a baffled look, “I did?? When?? Wait, uh…”

Kaito tilted his head, trying to recall. “...is this the horse thing? Okay, I will admit, I was a little short with him about the horse thing. I was still kinda in the headspace that I’d need to basically bully you guys into coming back… It can’t be that big a difference. Is it that big a difference?”

“I’m talking about the other day, when he got his toe broken again,” Doppio groaned, before scoffing, “But the fact that you can relate it to that too? And it is that big of a difference. I’m not saying baby him, because frankly I’d like you to stop doing that to me, but just…” Doppio let his frustration out in a sigh. “Stop treating him like the answer to every behavior is to harass him. You’re an adult…you’re supposed to be above stupid, petty games. If you’re gonna insist on treating me like a kid…treat him like one too. You said all that stuff about me getting more time, but even if our paperwork now has a defined number, he’s not actually older than me. Just…stop it.”

Gnawing on his cheek a little, Doppio took a small breath. “...I care about him. I’m not gonna tolerate someone treating him poorly. He deserves better.”

“...alright.” Kaito sighed, nodding. “I swear, I have my own reasons for why I feel like I need to be a little tougher on Arven, but… if you’re seeing an issue? I’ll trust you on it. I know damn well I can go full ‘Kaito Goggles’ on things, and when you go around with filters in how you see people, sometimes you gotta just trust when someone’s saying you’re seeing something wrong. Alright. I’ll be gentler on the kid.”

“I don’t want to play head games with Arven. If anything, I don’t want either of you two to ever have to question my intentions with you. My goal is to support you both. If what I’m doing isn’t making your lives better, or is making you feel worse or struggle more, then I’m failing… for the most part. There are boss and abandonment shaped holes in that logic, but otherwise? The things I do should be making your lives tangibly better in some way. That’s the goal. So I can fuss over Arven too.”

“.......you guys wanted to go on some sort of date soon, right? Or some cafe thing?” Kaito mused, thinking about it. “If you and Arven can just keep yourselves healthy and rested by, let’s say…I want to say this Sunday, but let’s be honest, one day isn’t much rest. By Monday afternoon, after school? I’ll be your biggest advocate for whatever you two feel like doing that afternoon. Whatever it is, I’ll make sure you can do it. Just rest this weekend. Let that chest of yours settle and his poor damn toe heal. God his foot worries me, the kid thinks he’s invincible. Do you think he’d look at me cross-eyed if I got him a wheelchair for a little while? At least maybe a damn cane… he just needs to rest it! You both need to rest! Gah! Please take that nap when you get back, you’re gonna give me a stress headache worrying about you! Gah!” 

Doppio nodded, letting some tension fall from himself as he guided Kaito out of the open market, and towards a specialty shop. Normally he’d chat with the nonnas and nonnos there, but…he just wanted to get back to the castle at this point. 

“...not a date,” Doppio softly murmured, cheeks turning red. “We just…wanted to hang out. Do something fun. There’s stuff going on at the castle, I guess, but it’s kinda weird…” Sunday was a day past the three-day riot window they had warned the princes about before, but…

Doppio blinked, suddenly growing much redder. Monday after school… Getting honey-brick toast after school… Just like he’d seen and read about… Maybe…maybe Monday wasn’t such a bad idea…

Giving Kaito a soft nod as he picked out the fresh pasta and cheese they needed, Doppio sighed softly. “He didn’t tell me until 20 minutes later that his foot was hurting, the other day… And only ‘cause I said I wanted to go rest first. That kind of pain tolerance can be helpful, but…I really wish he’d just tell me. There’s no point to withstanding it if there’s nothing going on anyway.”

“Ah, some people are just stubborn,” Kaito said. “...like my ‘Kichi! And my Maki-roll, for that matter, though with her I can usually feel pretty confident she actually will be okay, she’s good at damage management. Shuichi’s a total crybaby these days, he’ll whine and pout about anything bothering him and I kinda love it, honestly, it makes him so easy to take care of. But Kokichi! My guy literally has to have a heart attack before he’ll slow down! He used to pull these work all nighters, ate sporadically and poorly, and he’d just get pissed if you pointed out that he needed to slow down at all. He’ll just keep going till WHAM!”

Kaito punched his fist into his hand. “His body just hits a wall! Arven’s gotta avoid doing that!”

Rubbing his nose a little, Kaito sniffed, “Now, if you ask my husbands, they may suggest I do that even moreso. They are, of course, entitled to their wrong opinions. There’s a difference between ignoring getting sick, and not getting sick. I just happen to be a very healthy guy. When Arven gets as ripped as I am, then he can walk around like nothing hurts him, maybe.”

Doppio nodded, having heard all that from Shuuichi before…though as Kaito went into more detail, Doppio frowned, a more worried expression settling on him. Sure, Boss certainly wasn’t heart attack prone, and…well, Doppio didn’t really know the details, but whatever the truth of the heir’s prolific health problems, Boss didn’t have those either, but…

(All-nighters? Eating sporadically and poorly? …getting angry if anyone tried to point it out?)

Huffing, Doppio gave Kaito an unimpressed look. “...having muscles doesn’t mean you can’t get sick. When I got that cold, that was literally the first time I’ve ever been ill. And plenty of stuff hurts you.”

After paying, Doppio tucked the last of the ingredients with the others before returning to Kaito’s side, anxiously scratching his hand as he looked around. “...you said that your husband used to do all that stuff… How… Why did he stop?”

“Why’d he stop?” Kaito repeated, looking down at Doppio as they headed back towards the castle. “I mean, I can really only speculate. I like to think I fussed at him enough to change some of his patterns, but that’s honestly probably not actually the case. At least, not more than just letting him know those things bothered me.”

“No, what I think happened… and this might be just as self-important, but I think it’s true, is that Kokichi realized that if he wanted to take care of his family? Of me and Shuichi and Miyako, and Maki and Tim, I think at least to some extent, though maybe that’s me projecting… he was gonna have to be better.” Kaito shrugged. “He was gonna need to take care of himself, properly and consistently. Cause with how things were, we were… probably never gonna be able to rely on him. At least not consistently, not if he was working himself into the dirt. Like… literally working himself into the dirt.” 

“Honestly, I got lucky to have been given a husband who loves me and our family so much that he was willing to change for us,” Kaito said softly. “Hard changes too. Habits are tough to break, and even more so when they’re, like, coping mechanisms. And none of us could have made him do it, not really. At some point he just decided he was going to be more on top of things, and he followed through… and we’re going to make it to 80, because of that. 80 at least,” Kaito said, gripping his hands into fists, “My ‘Kichi chose not to widow me at damn 21 or whenever he was planning to keel over and die. And he’s putting in the work to do it. That’s what happened.”

It probably wasn’t the fussing. Doppio had now seen first hand how crazy projection could get, but…well, as Kaito went on, he seemed to agree. It wasn’t the fussing alone, at the very least. 

Kokichi wanted to take care of his family… He wanted to be dependable… Dependable was definitely a word he’d heard countless times used to describe the heir apparent. The guy seemed to never stop working, for how often Doppio had overheard people singing the prince’s praises, for this or that he’d solved for them. 

…that, apparently, was part of the problem. 

But…because of his family, Kokichi had…chosen to be dependable in more than just his work, it sounded like. He had seen a change he wanted and pursued it thoroughly. Doppio could definitely respect that. 

(...Kokichi had chosen not to widow Kaito at 21…and however old Kaito was)

(...would…Boss choose to…)

(...he was already abandoned. Unclaimed. Would it really be orphaning if…)

“...that’s pretty amazing,” Doppio said softly, looking amazed, if ‘amazed’ meant ‘anxious and close to tears’. 

“Ah, kid, you’re determined to break my heart today, huh?” Kaito murmured, glancing over at Doppio and seeing the miserable wobble in his eyes. 

Turning around, the area they were in thinned out enough for him to be able to pull Doppio aside, off the path, Kaito pulled him into a hug. Holding him and rubbing his back, as he said softly, “You’re too good to be dealing with all this terrible shit. You deserved so much better than all of this, Doppio. You’re clever and hard working and surprisingly sweet, when you want to be. You didn’t deserve all of this. You deserved someone to be willing to change for you too.”

And, since Kaito had Doppio in his arms anyway, he held him tight and said, “...I’m sorry your life changed without your permission. I came in out of nowhere and suddenly everything was different and scary and none of that was fair on you. I made a lot of decisions that affected you, things you didn’t want or ask for. I’m sorry. I should have at least talked to you before I did all of those things. I made a lot of mistakes. You deserved better than this.”

This, too, was infuriatingly familiar. The warmth and sturdiness of Kaito’s arms around him, holding him tight in a way that was…better. Better than before, better than his hopes…better than his fears. The gentle rub on his back, and the way that Doppio’s body melted in, shaking but…alright in that collapse. Trusting the frame around him to hold things together instead, just for a little while. 

…and it was even better (and worse) because…someone else was apologizing for once. 

There were little hitches in Doppio’s breath as he quietly cried against Kaito’s chest and he weakly punched the prince before curling a fist in his shirt. More desperate than demanding. “Stop making me cry, you jerk,” he sniffled, pressing into the hug more. 

…did he deserve someone changing for him? Doppio had always been grateful for anything and everything Boss gave him. He had no right to actually ask for anything… Everything was for Boss, for his vision and dreams, Doppio was just…an asset for achieving those things. It was never about him. 

…he didn’t want Boss to die… He didn’t want to be left behind.

A small sob broke through Doppio’s otherwise soft tears, his back shuddering in Kaito’s hold. It wasn’t fair. Everything was different and Doppio could blame Kaito all he wanted…but Kaito was still here. …and, fuck, Doppio needed someone to be there.

“Sorry to tell ya this, but once that dam is open, it’s really hard to shut it,” Kaito said softly, ignoring the hits against him, just trying to continue the rub against Doppio’s back. “Which is probably a good thing. I don’t think these are the kind of problems you can have just one good cry about and then move on from it. It’s probably something you’re going to need to cry about for a while. Like, a stupid long time, months… sorry. That just seems to be how it goes…”

“But, ya know… it does feel better. After awhile,” Kaito said softly, “Not like it’s ‘gone away’, or, not that I’ve experienced yet… oh.” Kaito’s eyes widened a little, before he said, “No, that’s a lie. I do know that eventually the pain goes away entirely. It takes a lot of working through it, but once you’ve really talked it out, and let yourself feel it, and let yourself be supported… things that were agony once become just sorta sad memories. Not painful, just distant and sad. And you move on from them. So… don’t let me talk like this is some never ending process. That’s just me being so far removed from my own recovery of stuff that I’ve forgotten it even happened. Things do get better. It will. I promise.”

Korekiyo had terrible flaws that, honestly, Kaito might have to work through specifically someday with his therapist. But his boyfriend had done one thing right. He really had helped Kaito process and deal with the Chad incident. With the party. Kaito’s more or less peace with what that day had been like wasn’t him repressing anything. He had spent basically a year talking it out with Kore. Grieving it and putting context to it and working through it. Had Korekiyo had his own reasons to want to? Sure. But the process had genuinely helped Kaito. He barely thought about that day, anymore, and when he did, it wasn’t like a screeching siren of anxiety, shame, and dread in his mind anymore. It was just… something sad that had happened once. Something he had actually recovered from.

Using that as a reference? Kaito felt confident Doppio really would be okay, someday.

-

Doppio had kept his head down after he’d calmed down and the two of them had returned to the castle, feeling embarrassed about his reddened eyes and blotchy face. And when they split up, agreeing to meet back up in the practice kitchen around 5pm, Doppio really thought he was all cried out. His body was sore and aching, his chest uncomfortably tight, eyes beyond tired…as was he. He was tired. 

And yet, as he started cleaning himself up…

Turns out he still had a few tears to spare, honing in on the ‘shame’ angle now. 

Doppio had changed into new clothes, but he simply laid on his and Arven’s beds on his stomach, his cat pillow pulled tight over his head as he leaked tears into the bedding. 

Arven had stepped out for a bit, his essay done and Doppio not back yet, mostly just to wander around and let Chief use the bathroom. Heading back, when he opened the door he could tell by the way Chief started wagging his tail immediately that someone was inside, and while he was excited to see that Doppio was back… “Aceto?”

Closing the door, Arven hurried over, looking Doppio over before sitting next to him. “Hey, what the heck, what happened!? I thought you would be cooking, what’s wrong?” Arven asked, vague fears of new developments with ‘the boss’... or worse, Kaito pulling some bullshit again.

There was a muffled sniffle before Doppio turned his head, peeking out from under the pillow. “...we still are, b-but just closer to dinner.”

…he…didn’t really want to tell Arven. It was embarrassing, and of all these insane people Doppio was meeting…Arven was the person he actually cared if he still liked him. Thought he was cool. Didn’t…think he was a colossal fuck-up…

…but Arven was also the only person he really…trusted. Fully. 

“...I had another panic attack,” Doppio quietly admitted, his voice a little rough from all the crying. Though, a wobble soon joined it as he added in, “...’n-’n I pissed myself. Literally.”

Arven winced, his nose wrinkling a little as he made a small, alarmed ‘tssssss’ sound at that. Not sure what to say but absolutely trying to convey a sense of ‘oh shit’ in his body language, as he reached out to place a hand on Doppio’s back. Not doing anything with it, just wanting to show Doppio he was there in some concrete, physical way, before finding some words he was scrambling for. 

“That… ouch,” Arven finally settled on, “Aceto, what happened? What set you off? Are you okay now?”

“Dun ‘member…” Doppio mumbled into their blankets before he sniffled again and put a hand partially on Arven’s leg. Just trying to show that he was okay with the hand on his back and, yanno, Arven being there. Even if he was…just…a dumb, stupid, useless baby who couldn’t even sit up…

“...I got really disoriented after Kaito calmed me down… We were on a roof, for some reason. Just…” Doppio hiccuped a word, scrunching his eyes around a set of tears. “...just prolly talked about stuff ‘n I freaked out. Like usual…”

Arven pouted a little at that. Doppio sounded so defeated…

So Arven laid down next to him. Putting his arms under his head like a pillow, he settled in next to Doppio, giving him a soft look. “I’m sorry. That sucks… I should have gone with you. I don’t like the idea of you just on some roof somewhere, overwhelmed by stuff. I’d have liked to have been there to help. Sorry I wasn’t there.”

Gently pressing his knuckles against Arven’s arm once he laid down, Doppio just sniffled. “...think it would’ve been more embarrassing… I…” He huffed softly. “...I hate being like this in front of you… You’re really cool and I just…keep being a mess. I feel so pathetic…”

“I don’t really think you’re a mess,” Arven said, grinning a little thinly, “But I do think life’s kinda imploding on you right now? I don’t think I’d be acting cool in your position. I think maybe I’d act kind of like a jackass, and cry a lot, because everything you’re going through is stressful. I think maybe you’re not giving yourself enough credit.”

“...” Arven didn’t want to assume. But Doppio looked a mess, tired and haggard, and maybe one of the reasons he still looked so miserable could be… “Have you taken a shower since you got back?” Arven asked, feeling guilty even asking. It felt like an accusation. It wasn’t one, he was just worried.

What did he do to deserve Arven? Kaito kept framing things like that, like Doppio deserved better, though that was obviously wrong, but…Arven? Even if he was so much better than Doppio could ever dream…he was grateful. He would make Arven’s life celebration the best ever, and maybe that could express even a fraction of how wonderful he thought Arven was. 

“Mhmm…” Doppio nodded, the action causing some of his loose hair to fall into his face…since he hadn’t bothered braiding it back up after his shower. Flushing a bit, Doppio scrunched his eyes shut in further embarrassment. “...had to stop in the middle to throw up ‘n the toilet since I didn’t wanna clean the shower afterwards. …walked home with…my fucking pants wet…’course I took a shower. …’s so gross…”

Arven relaxed a little, nodding. The bags under Doppio’s eyes had made Arven think maybe his boyfriend hadn’t had the energy to clean himself yet, but, more likely now it was just because Doppio had been crying since the shower happened. That made sense.

Still, he winced again. “You threw up? Aw, man, you have had a rough day. You’re not gross though, Aceto. You don’t even remember what happened. For all we know, that lunatic prince could have, uh…” Arven grinned, teasing a little, “Tickled you until you pissed yourself. I bet he would. That does not seem that out of character for that weirdo. It's probably not even a memory issue this time, I bet you repressed it because it was full of horrifying tickling.” 

Sure, he wasn’t gross now…except for his…wet face and…snotty nose…

…he appreciated it. 

Snorting, Doppio couldn’t hold back a small grin. “It does seem possible. Think he’d be worried about me falling off the roof, but he’d probably just think it was fine since he could pull me back up. Think he just likes boasting about his size--did you see how he picked Prince Kokichi up like a cat? ‘N he was talking all about how he doesn’t get sick ‘cause he’s ripped or something.”

“Good thing I don’t remember, prolly just embarrassing for both of us,” Doppio snorted, before he sighed. Shuffling a little closer to Arven. 

“...I feel like shit.”

Arven laughed, a soft, snickering little sound, nodding along with Doppio’s observations. “I’ve always heard about guys like this before, but I think Kaito’s the first actual ‘beefhead’ I’ve ever met. Those muscles must be strangling his brain or something.”

Arven was mostly just teasing– as the resident ‘guy who had totally upended their lives’, Kaito made a great target– but he calmed down the derision when he saw Doppio was ready to move on. Pulling out one of his arm pillows, he wrapped it around Doppio’s waist. “Yeah, I can tell. Anything I can do to help?”

Doppio smiled softly as he felt Arven’s arm around him. The closeness, the teasing, the understanding… “...you already have, by being here,” Doppio admitted, deciding not to keep that just as a thought. He’d made a firm stance against Kaito before, but…honestly? He could do to compliment Arven more himself. Arven was just…amazing. He deserved everything. 

…but he knew that offer was genuine and…

Flushing a little, Doppio took on a sheepish look. “...look, I… This is weird. But I don’t mean it, like…you know… Um…” Huffing a small breath, Doppio quickly asked, “Could you lie on top of me?”

Arven blinked at Doppio.

“...??” Arven was getting mixed messages. This didn’t feel like a, uh… request for the sorts of things they had taken to doing together, the last few days. He just wasn’t getting that energy off Doppio right now. But it was immediately where his mind went. 

“Um, the answer is ‘sure’ either way, but, are we…” Arven said, lifting himself up onto his elbows, looking curiously down at Doppio, “...m-messing up your underwear again? Or is this something else?”

Doppio flared scarlet. “S-something else,” he squeaked, pulling his pillow more over his face again. 

…

…

“...don’t…make fun of me,” a soft request came. “...things…feel better when I’m being crushed. Or just…some kind of pressure on me.”

“Oh?” Arven said, looking curious still, “Okay? Sure, let’s do it.”

Shifting onto his knees, Arven swung his leg over Doppio’s hips– nope, nope, not where this was going, calm down– before shooting Doppio’s slightly thinner body a mildly worried look. “Let me know if I feel uncomfortable, okay?”

Then, carefully, he laid himself down on Doppio, crossing his legs at his ankles to more securely lay on Doppio’s legs, and putting his elbows up along the side of either side of Doppio’s back, overlapping his hands on Doppio’s back to place Arven’s own chin against his knuckles. Staring at the cat pillow, which stared with cartoonish cheer back at him.

“...well?” Arven asked, “How is it?”

Doppio let out a long, slow breath as Arven got on top of him. He had actually meant to roll over first, but by the time his brain reminded him of that, Arven was already over, so… That was probably for the best, honestly. This wasn’t a, y-yanno, thing that he’d already established it wasn’t…

…but Doppio thought he’d like it in that context too. And this really wasn’t the time for that. 

And as Arven settled in on top of him…Doppio’s eyes went half-lidded, something… He would describe it as spacing out in his head, but not so…mundane. Just a state of…calm, or zen, even, as muscles Doppio hadn’t even realized he’d been clenching relaxed. Things just feeling…okay. 

“...s’good,” Doppio softly slurred back, before he took a small breath. “...thanks. I know it’s…weird…”

Arven smiled. “Nah…”

“...you’re acting really cute right now,” Arven said softly. “Are you sleepy all of the sudden?”

Cute? Arven did call him cute a lot… It made Doppio happy, mostly from just how…pleased his boyfriend looked when he said stuff like that. 

“...’n all of a sudden…” Doppio hummed, closing his eyes as he just…existed. With that pressure all around him… Arven making him sink into the mattress a bit. “Got tired after…m’ panic attack… Had to finish shopping though, ‘cause…part of Kaito’s lesson. T’ pay him back for…saving my life and everything. …good hugs.”

“Saving your life, huh,” Arven murmured, tilting his head a little, watching Doppio sort of fade out on him. His boyfriend was really cute. Freckles all over skin a shade or so darker than Arven himself. Pretty… “You’re really pretty, Aceto,” Arven said softly. 

“...it’s good that you like stuff like this,” Arven said, glancing past the edge of the bed, where Chief had laid himself out on his back, content to pant up at the ceiling, off in his own little doggy world. “Chief likes to sleep on top of people, so maybe this is perfect, honestly. And when Chief doesn’t feel like it, maybe I can sneak in and you let me do this more often too… you’re warm. It’s comfy. You smell like sunlight. I know I keep saying that. I just...really like it.”

“...are you falling asleep on me, Aceto?” Arven asked quietly.

“S’comfy under Chief too… He’s a good dog,” Doppio mumbled, his breaths clear and soft. Somewhere, Doppio still knew that his chest kind of hurt, but…it wasn’t really bothering him right now. Not when things just…were. “...but really like you. More than just for this…’course. Comfy, ‘n warm, ‘n smell good too… …slept really good at your house ‘cause…stuff smelled like you. Didn’t really think that was a thing people noticed, before…”

Sighing, Doppio made a sort of indistinct hum in his throat. “...maybe. But like talking with you too… ‘Could listen to you forever, always have interesting things to say.”

Doppio opened his eyes a sliver, just to blink slowly. “...when’s your birthday, Arven? Kaito said…it’s cool to make a…like…celebration of a person ‘n their life, for their birthday, ‘n give gifts. ‘D always cook you whatever you want, but… Wanna do something even more special for your birthday. ‘Cause ‘m happy you’re alive ‘n I wanna celebrate that.”

Arven smiled. “My birthday is at the beginning of next month, actually. You wanna celebrate my birthday, Aceto? That sounds like fun… I’d wanna celebrate with you. I’d eat whatever you want to make me. I always want to spend the day with you, but I think I’d especially want to spend the day with you on my birthday too.”

“I don’t know what I’d want for a gift, beyond just you being there,” Arven admitted, closing his eyes. “It’s been a long time since I’ve been given a gift. My mom used to send me stuff when I was little, but one year that just stopped. After that, sometimes my friends would get me gifts, but after a while I stopped telling people when my birthday was coming up, and people stopped thinking to ask. I think the last time I did something with someone else to celebrate was when I was… 13? My friends found out it was my birthday about halfway through, pure coincidence, so they bought me lunch and we hung out in a park…”

Arven snickered. “We stole one of their parents’ cases of beer. It was gross. We mostly just spent time daring each other to drink it or making it a punishment for losing a bet or game or something. I may have gotten tipsy? I don’t know. Never had any since then. Beer is really bad tasting.”

Doppio smiled softly. He always wanted to spend his days with Arven too, so…it was nice knowing it was mutual. And still feeling special enough for a personal celebration. 

“Only ever given people apology gifts before,” Doppio admitted in turn. “Boss never cared ‘about celebrating Unity, so…never had a reason… Wanna figure out something cool for you… ‘N gonna make the best food.”

…that seemed a little sad. Sure, Doppio had just found out about the concept of a life celebration, but…if you were used to it? And people just stopped? …no way. Arven deserved to be cherished, like…all the time. 

Doppio huffed a small laugh. “Can be pretty bitter… Not much of a fan myself… Like wine better, ‘f ‘m choosing something, ‘n…some cocktails ‘r pretty good…’f someone at a bar bought me something. Kaito ‘n Waku got me an ice cream one, when we met…”

He peeked a blissed out gold eye up at Arven, shifting the pillow a bit. “...would you wanna get drunk sometime? Cookin’ booze isn’t really good for drinking…but I could probably mix somethin’ decent tasting…oh!”

“...I think I wanna get high sometime. ‘S talking t’ Mariah about it…”

“Who’s Mariah?” Arven asked, before a memory clicked, “Oh, the therapist? Huh. I’d be up to trying whatever with you. I don’t know what I’m like drunk, never really got into it, but you’ve sort of seen me high. Just sort of get spaced out and chill. I’ve had a bad trip once, but thankfully that was just once. Spent it trying to write letters to my mom and went through a ton of paper and envelopes. When I was sober later, I looked through them, and it all looked like rambling chicken scratch. No idea what I was trying to say.”

“But it sounds like fun, doing those things with you,” Arven said, closing his eyes, “Maybe we could get high and go look at the aquarium fish, see the penguins. Bet that would be wild. Though, that’d probably be fun sober too. Get high and walk around the gardens? Get our minds just blown looking at flowers.” Arven snickered. 

“Kaito bought you alcohol when you first met? That worrywort?” Arven asked, brow furrowing a little, “That’s kinda weird. I feel like if he saw us drinking he’d scream ‘shenanigans’ and drag us back here to think about what we did.”

“Ll prolly ask recommendations… Never taken anything before but…’m curious what bein’ high’d be like. Jus’ wanna be safe ‘bout it ‘n not accidentally get addicted t’ anything.” Doppio nodded a little against their bed, before humming lowly as Arven described his bad high. Not the worst thing that could’ve happened…but if Arven was going to try writing to his mom, it’d probably be better sober. Just so there was no mistake when he called her out on how shitty she was. 

“‘Nythin’ is fun with you. Dunno ‘f wanna be high for the first time in public though… Mariah said ‘s good to have a tripsitter you trust ‘n…other advice. Don’ remember…”

Snorting a little, Doppio rolled his closed eyes. “‘Solutely. …thought I’d been given a roofie, ‘ think, ‘n…so he bought me an ale ‘n food. But his friends ‘n ‘im were out drinking so they got me another drink too… Kept tellin’ ‘em I was an adult so…think ‘e thought it was fine. Only asked like…twice I think ‘f I wanted to do the shots they were doin’.”

“Kaito thought you were roofied?” Arven asked, shocked by this, lifting up his head to look at Doppio’s cute, borderline sleeping face more fully. “Why? Were you?”

“No…” Doppio said softly. “...don’ remember why I was at the bar, but…got run into, ‘n Kaito picked me off the ground, ‘n think he got worried when I wasn’t, like…” Doppio trailed off, the word escaping him. “...super…assured, I think… ‘bout if I’d been drinking or…whatever.”

“...know ‘bout roofies though,” he sighed. “Have a drink checker in my bag… ‘n Boss had a talk with me ‘bout…not goin’ off with people who say weird stuff about me…”

“Huh.” Arven hummed, settling down a bit. He could see that. If someone couldn’t remember if they had drunk any alcohol, but was showing signs of being drunk, then… yeah. Maybe roofied. Was that why Prince Kaito had gotten so obsessed with Doppio? A strange, random encounter based around the idea that he might need to save him? Followed by shots, apparently.

Huh.

“Weird stuff, hm?” Arven hummed… before smirking a little, he said boldly, “Like… that you have a nice butt? Cause, ya know… you, uh…” Arven snickered, having flustered himself a little with what had been meant to be a joke, “You do. Have a nice butt.”

Doppio flushed lightly, blinking his eyes up at Arven flusteredly. 

…Arven thought he had a nice butt?

(Doppio had…sometimes heard people say similar things, behind his back. Usually, ah…weirder. Than just saying he had a nice butt.)

Smiling softly into their blankets, Doppio gave a flustered hum. “...you have a nice butt too… ‘s what ‘Maina was teasing me ‘bout, before… ‘Cause she knew I liked you, so…some of that flirting was to mess with me. ‘Cause you’re super pretty and I kept staring…”

“...like it when you touch my butt.”

Arven laughed, burying his face into both his hands and Doppio’s back, his ears burning red. “...I know.”

“Or, I knew.” Arven laughed again. “She’s not exactly subtle. And she’d sometimes make these little comments to me too. I don’t know where she got it, but she pointed out this particularly big freckle on the shell of your right ear, and asked me if I thought it was cute? I, like a fool, said ‘sure’, and suddenly I was an ‘ear’ guy. Oooh, look at Doppio’s ears, they’re looking cute today, huh little Senpai, they turned color when you said that thing, did you notice baby king? And you know what?” Arven groaned into Doppio’s back, “Now I can’t stop noticing your ears! You have cute ears! It’s all Amaina’s fault.”

Even blissed out as he was, Doppio couldn’t help but blush more, his ears indeed turning red…though, thankfully, he was still mostly protected by his guardian cat pillow. “Cute ears…”

“...ugh, she’s a little menace,” Doppio huffed, though his tone was still fond. “It feels like she started from th’ start…how’d she even know? The second you were trying to protect me from those jerks, she was just…so happy about ‘little senpai’. …guess if you live people’s thoughts, your first ‘mpression judgements ‘r pretty good.”

“Kaito seemed pretty convinced early on we were gonna get up to ‘shenanigans’ too, even if he wasn’t calling it that then.” Arven chuckled, “Maybe it was just more obvious to everyone else. I know my head wasn’t there until we made a run for it… or, well, noooo, there may have been a moment or two when you spent the night… maybe three thoughts.” Arven blushed. “Three whole thoughts.”

“...” Arven’s face suddenly turned bright red, burying it in his arms. “...kinda touch’n your butt now,” he admitted, snickering at his own fluster. Why did he keep saying things that embarrassed him!? Gah! “So, uh… glad you… like it. If you still do.”

“Thought you were really cool, when we first started really talking…while we were cooking,” Doppio admitted. “This beautiful, responsible, smart, funny guy… At first ‘ was jus’ like…’kay, maybe he’s not so bad, kinda cool actually… But you just kept getting cooler…”

“...think I started t’ like you when…you wrote ‘n my notebook. But I thought it was jus’...friendly stuff. ‘N just liked you more ‘n more after that. Maybe it was obvious but…I just liked spending time with you… Even if sometimes you made it real’ hard not to want to kiss you.”

Huffing a small laugh into the bed, Doppio hummed. “...still do. S’not in that way, but…feels good, now. You on me.”

Doppio might not feel good ‘in that way’ at the moment, but Arven had let his mind wander too much, and now was trying valiantly to calm himself down. Feeling flustered and embarrassed, Arven nodded into Doppio’s back, admitting, “I think I was starting to like you by the time I wrote in your notebook too. I just didn’t realize exactly what those feelings were. I think I thought some of that excitement was just finding someone who I felt like I could relate to. Putting up our middle fingers to the system together.”

“I didn’t realize that ‘comradery’ feeling came with, like… butt touching desires.” Arven laughed lightly, “That was admittedly a surprise. That snuck up on me.”

“Never really thought ‘bout people that way…’r having those feelings. But it didn’t feel…dunno. Wrong? With you…” Doppio hummed, melting down a bit. “Jus’ wondered why I was getting so embarrassed ‘n…wanted to hang out with you all the time…’n thought about you a lot… It’s nice. ‘S good feeling.”

“...did freak out a little when I woke up hard that night in th’ hills,” he admitted with a soft snort. “Did’n’ wanna wake you up, but…kept sighin’ into my neck and…your leg was…yanno. Thought I was gonna die of embarrassment…”

“...?” Arven brought his head up again, giving Doppio a bewildered look. “...oh. Oooooooh… that’s so funny. The exact same thing happened to me. I thought I got off so lucky that you needed to get up and go pee for… actually, in retrospect, really just enough time…”

“...I might be kinda oblivious sometimes,” Arven realized, resting his head again. “That’s really funny.”

“....... I think about you a lot these days,” Arven admitted, “Like a stupid amount. Sometimes even when you’re right in front of me. I just really get caught up thinking about you. Things. Stuff.”

“Mrrp?” Doppio mrrped, tilting his head to look back at Arven with a similarly confused look. “...wait, really? …how the hell did I miss that? You were pressed right against me…”

He huffed through a laugh. “I think we both can be…at least sometimes… ‘M jus’ glad I didn’t freak you out…”

Settling down again, he gave Arven a soft smile. “...whenever I think about cooking, ‘m always thinkin’ about if you’d like something, or what you’d say if we collabed on it. ‘N when it’s nice out, I think about all the places we could travel together, ‘n things you’d wanna show me. …’n I think about how you always get your shirt tucked in nicely, no weird wrinkles…’n how your hair kinda curls straight up at the back of your neck…’n I try to think about ways to make you laugh, ‘cause you have the best laugh I’ve ever heard…”

“...that kinda stuff and things?”

“Yeah,” Arven laughed, peering back at him warmly, “That, and sort of remembering just really little moments? Like moments I thought you looked pretty, or moments where Amaina was giggling into my ear about you. Just little happy moments, where you're happy or seem excited. It can feel a little silly, getting caught up daydreaming about you when you’re literally right there. I feel a little ridiculous when that happens.”

“And yeah, I daydream about future stuff to do with you. I really wanna take you to that dog park sometime soon. I love the idea of you just surrounded by a bunch of really excited dogs.” Arven smiled. “Like, too many dogs. I have to throw a stick to keep the dogs from accidentally knocking you over, because they’re so excited to see you, and you just can’t bring yourself to be stern with them… persistent daydream.”

“.... and other things,” Arven admitted, “But I don’t want to think about those things too much right now. I’m nowhere near as tired as you are, and I don’t want to get up and have to run to the bathroom or something. I’m enjoying chatting, while you can manage to stay awake.”

Doppio nodded slightly. Those things too… For as much of an anxious mess he’d been…those two days, just one day, taking into account them heading out and being corralled back, out in the hills had been…amazing. Just…being out in nature with Arven, enjoying the world around them. Even if it had bored Amaina at times…it all had seemed amazing to Doppio. 

…he couldn’t remember how much of Dicea he’d actually seen. What were memories that he’d made over the past year and a half, and what were…just things he convinced himself he’d seen, to fill in over a decade of lost time. …he wanted to see it all for real. With Arven…and make more of those lovely memories. 

“I’m looking forward to the dog park… I always got so excited when people let me pet their pets, or just say hello. I could just sit somewhere and watch rock doves and crows and other urban birds for ages too… It’s gonna be fun.”

At first, Doppio was a little confused, not really sure how…talking? Would make Arven need to use the bathroom, but--oh. Oh. He meant… Flushing, Doppio glanced up at Arven shyly. “...M looking forward to…those things too. I…”

The shy look faded as Doppio softly huffed, too comfortable to really get angry. “...Kaito was being a jerk about you again, so…I called him out on it. ‘Kept talking like…you were pushing me ‘r something but…’s none of his business. We talk an’...it’s good.”

Arven scoffed a little. “That guy just doesn’t like me or something. I mean, I know he’s trying to help me with school and all of that, but there’s this weird edge to it, have you noticed? I mean, I guess you have, if you called him out. I should do that too, next time. I don’t know what I did to convince him I’m some, like, jerk or bully or something. But it’s absolutely like he thinks any second I’m gonna push you into a sandcastle or something.”

“...though, definitely tell me if I ever am being a jerk.” Arven frowned. “I mean, with stuff like ‘that’, it feels really hot and cold to me. Like, sometimes I get really nervous when I realize things are heading in that direction. Like… actually scared, sort of nervous. Not because of anything you did, or because I don’t want to do it, just… it can be intimidating, how strongly my body reacts to it? I get embarrassed, and then embarrassed by that embarrassment, and then I start imagining that you might feel embarrassed, and am I making you embarrassed, and am I doing something wrong and if it’s not wrong then why do I feel so… embarrassed?”

“...and then we really get started and I get really into it,” Arven said, “Which is fun in the moment, but makes me feel insecure afterwards. Like maybe I did something wrong after all… I don’t know. It’s hard to explain. But I don’t think I’m whatever Kaito’s imagining I am, with that sort of thing. I don’t get why he thinks different.”

Doppio nodded, frowning. “S pretty much what I told him… And he got all surprised like ‘whaaaaat, no! I don’t treat Arven that differently!’ ‘N so I told ‘im what’s what… He, uh…did go on a weird tangent I didn’t really get, but… I think he’s projecting on you, ‘n he’s got some weird self-hatred issues. But you’re not him, and you’re not even like him, and you don’t deserve to be treated badly, like…period. And…he said he’d listen, ‘n change. So…hopefully you’re getting an apology soon.”

…so Arven did get scared when they were together? Doppio wasn’t just imagining that…

“...’s a lotta fun,” Doppio softly agreed, before he turned his head a little more, peeking up at Arven. “...but maybe we should slow down ‘n…take things more moment by moment? Just ‘cause…’s overwhelming…right? M’by that’d help with the embarrassment… ‘n I don’t wanna do anything that makes you feel bad or insecure… “N…I think…” He blinked slowly. “...I think just…’cause we’ve done it before? Doesn’t…have to mean we’re at or past that level. ‘M not saying I don’t wanna do things with you, but…maybe it’d be better to stay in our comfort zones for…longer. ‘N not worry ‘bout…havin’ to do more to feel closer.”

“...already feel close to you. Don’ need to prove it with anything.”

Something relaxed in Arven, basically immediately. “Yeah? I mean… that wouldn’t disappoint you? If maybe we took a step back from all of that?”

“I mean, it felt really good! And, a part of me gets excited every time I remember it, or think it might happen again… but it does come with a weird… anxious feeling,” Arven admitted, “Like, just this anxiety that it’s gonna be different than how it is. It’s… a lot. It’s way more intimidating than when we make out or hold each other. I love making out with you. You’re a great kisser… but, yeah. I may not be ready for stuff like that, I guess. I feel lame saying that, but…”

Arven shrugged, brows pinched in genuine uncertainty. Both relieved and a little disappointed in himself. He had been a little in denial, maybe, about how rubbing against each other had been making him feel. The nerves, in retrospect, hitting him more than he had been willing to admit. But… “Maybe, in the future, we can try smaller stuff? Less, like… physically bouncing on top of each other stuff? I’d be okay with trying simpler things in the future, but, yeah, I may need us to step back from the other stuff. For a little while. Until it’s less intimidating.”

“...you sure that’s okay?” Arven asked softly.

Doppio blushed a little at being called a great kisser, but…

“Mhmm,” Doppio hummed simply, giving Arven a serene look. “It’s…kind of a lot… I think I got kinda caught up…” He sighed softly. “I hate to give him credit, but…I think Kaito might have one point, about me just…being surrounded with adults. Lot ‘f the people I knew just…talked ‘bout sex so casually that…think it made me misjudge how big it feels…”

“...feels good, with you…but so does a lotta other stuff,” Doppio nodded. “N I’d rather do stuff we’re both more comfortable with…hands down.” Bringing up a hand, Doppio turned it over, facing his palm up. Free to hold, if Arven wanted to. “...was worried. ‘Know you said it was okay, but…always got super nervous by how nervous you looked. ‘N…was a lot… Think it’ll be better, with less. Slower.”

“...not lame. Coolest guy I know.”

Arven took the hand the second he realized it was being offered, basking in that warm, relieved feeling as he smiled at him. “I don’t really feel like you pushed me into it or anything. I think I just sorta felt like, well, if Aceto’s ready, I should be ready too… and I will be, someday. Just not yet, I guess.”

“And do not tell Kaito he has a point about ‘shenanigans’,” Arven scoffed, “We take that to our respective graves.”

“Maybe, when you fall asleep, I’ll go kick down the prince’s door and demand to know what his problem is.” Arven huffed, “If he’s projecting some weird self-hatred stuff on me, he can whine about it to his therapists. We’re nothing alike anyway. No idea what he’s seeing.”

“‘Verybody’s different,” Doppio sleepily hummed. “Jus’ got wrapped up in you… Bu’ no reason to rush into things. We do thin’s our way…no’ anyone else’s.”

Certainly not Kaito’s. Even if he happened to be right about things here and there. 

Humming in agreement, Doppio nodded into the mattress. “Do it… ‘E needs t’ answer for himself. You’re you…’n Arven’s great.” He gently squeezed Arven’s hand. 

“...feelin’ a lot better. Grazie, tesoro…”

“You’re welcome. Sorry again you had such a rough day,” Arven whispered, squeezing Doppio’s hand back. “I…like you lots and lots and lots,” he whispered with a grin, feeling a little silly, “And lots more than that too. Just so you know.”

Doppio giggled softly, something light and…truly happy. “Mi piaci molto molto molto anche.” 

-

Arven didn’t have a fear of adults.

Not really. They were mostly non-entities in his life, there and gone, usually because Arven had moved on in some way. Moved on from that space, moved on from that grade, moved on from that town. Being abandoned early into his life had shown Arven that it was very easy, in fact, to just stand up and leave. He barely had to think about it, and had never stuck around for a conversation he didn’t really want to have before. Why would he, when it was so much easier to walk away?

Technically, Kaito was… more difficult to walk away from. Mostly because Arven had already tried, and then Kaito had recruited an equally overzealous guard and chased him three towns over to drag him back here. And had succeeded. And now Arven was technically living in Kaito’s home, at least temporarily. And theoretically if he left, he’d be dragged back again. 

So, admittedly, this was an unprecedented situation. But Arven wasn’t scared anyway.  Being sexual with Doppio was intimidating. Calling adults an asshole to their face was child's play.

But, Arven was still polite when he knocked on the door, doing it softly and announcing himself softly still. His softness was validated, when Prince Shuichi opened the door, a sleeping Miyako in his arms. “Yes?”

“Good afternoon. I’m looking for Kaito?”

Shuichi sighed. “He’s hunting down a… ‘fish tank’. For his new…” Shuichi looked even more hollowed out, saying dryly, “...’pets’. Last I heard, Waku told him there was an abandoned old fish tank on the fourth floor south wing. I believe he went to check room 432? Why, is everything alright?”

“Yes, I just had a question for him about next week. I’ll go seek him out, thank you,” Arven said.

Shuichi smiled. “You’re so polite. Please feel free to reach out to me if you can’t find Kaito, I can help too.”

“I will, thank you,” Arven said, heading off as Shuichi closed the door with a soft click. The guy held himself in a way where Arven thought he might like to be treated politely. It was just a vibe he put out.

Heading up to the fourth floor, it wasn’t long before he found the room in question, the door popped open. It seemed to be some sort of storage closet, essentially, some of the items inside looking like they might have been forgotten about at some point. All of it was random looking, boxes and dressers, a full body mirror with tarnished rust on its decorative metal borders, a large blanket with embroidered stitching that looked like it was coming undone somewhat. Just a room full of old, forgotten things– though, apparently not that forgotten, if Waku had been able to clue Kaito in to an item inside of it upon request– and deep among the objects, looking through a cardboard box while kneeling on top of a half buried old desk, was Kaito.

“You got a pet, Kaito?” Arven said, entirely to startle him. 

His effort was rewarded when Kaito full body flinched, a magazine he had been flipping through that he had pulled out of the box stumbling out of his hands. Arven had thought that was funny, but was a little befuddled when Kaito continued to look startled, reaching for the magazine, having to basically twist his body backwards and down to grab it where it had fallen, before throwing it quickly back into the box, before giving Arven a wide eyed look. “O-oh! Arven! Wow, you came out of nowhere!”

Okay, weird, but whatever. “Prince Shuichi said you’d be here,” Arven explained. “He said you were looking for a fish tank for your new fish?”

“Clams,” Kaito clarified, quickly closing up the box, his face weirdly red as he pushed it aside, then thought better of it, pulling it close to himself again. “A new fish tank for my clams! Doesn’t have to be big, better if it’s small, really, since I still don’t know where I’m gonna put it. Thinking of asking Shuichi if I can store them in his office. Though if the fish tank is small enough, I can put it on my shrine table…”

“...Clams?” Arven said dryly, the look on Shuichi’s face making more sense now. “Clams aren’t pets.”

“They live for ten to twelve years!” Kaito said cheerfully.

“...they are, at best, meaty plants.”

“Doppio named them! Ore and Chiette! I call them together the Orecchiettes!” Kaito grinned.

“........okay well if Aceto named them that’s cute,” Arven muttered. “But clams still aren’t pets.”

“Yeah yeah. Can I do something for you, Arven? What’s up?” Kaito asked, looking around, moving around some more items, like a random file stand sorter. “Doppio alright? He was having a time of it when I dropped him off. Please tell me he actually took the nap he was planning, he needs it.”

“He’s fine… What even happened?” Arven frowned, “He said you were both on the roof, and he has no idea why?”

“Poor kid had a panic attack. There’s a lot going on in his life right now, it’s understandable. Just happened to be on the roof where we were people watching,” Kaito said, shifting through more items, “But he is resting, though. Good, good. Try to let him do that, alright? He really does need the res–”

“He said you said that you have some weird self-hatred thing you’re taking out on me,” Arven said stiffly, “And I think he’s right. Or, you’re right, whoever said it. I think you’re taking something out on me.”

Kaito looked up from around the dresser he was searching behind, giving Arven a startled look. “...what?”

“And if that’s not the case, then you have to tell me what the heck your problem is with me,” Arven growled, baring his teeth at Kaito as he placed a hand on his hip, leaning back as he glared at him. “I don’t know where you got this idea that I’m some sort of pushover you can take out your personal problems on, but guess what? I’m not. And I’m fed up with it.”

“Pushover?” Kaito muttered, shuffling back over some of the items as he said, “I don’t know who’s going around calling you a pushover, but–”

Kaito’s eyes widened in genuine shock as Arven suddenly, grabbing the side of the dresser, pulled it through the items to face forward, blocking all by the smallest sliver of the storage closet's space. Then, grabbing the full length mirror next, Arven tipped it, nudging it between the dresser backing and the small space of walling between the door and the rest of the room. Thumping it into place, the mirror pushing the dresser tightly against the desk that Kaito was currently sitting on, essentially trapping Kaito on the other side of it, unless he was willing to destroy all the furniture to get through.

“But I’m not.” Arven smirked, crossing his arms. “Yeah. That’s what I’m saying.”

Kaito, after a moment, experimentally pushed against the dresser. It didn’t budge. “...okay, that was pretty clever,” Kaito said dryly, “But was there a point to that?”

“If I like your answers, it was just to show I could.” Arven huffed, jutting out his hip a little as he put his weight onto his leg, tilting his head at Kaito. “And if I don’t, it’s to trap you here until someone hears you shout and lets you out. Whenever that happens to be. I don’t know how populated this part of the castle is, and I’m not worried about it either way.”

“Oh, come on!” Kaito shouted, glowering at Arven through the space between the dresser and the wall, “What’d I do to deserve this!?”

“You’re a jerk to me! All the time!”

“Look at the kettle, being all smug against the pot!” Kaito shouted… before he took a steadying breath. A kid. Arven was just a kid. A kid acting out. Patience. “...Okay. It has been pointed out that I’ve been a little short or presumptive with you–”

“No doy,” Arven said dryly.

“But you give me a lot of warning signs that you could really end up being a jerk if someone doesn’t put their foot down, Arven!” Kaito shouted, gesturing to the dresser, “Exhibit one!”

“I only did this because you have a tendency to just grab people! And pick them up! And move them around! Believe it or not, you literally strong-arming everyone can kinda make arguing with you difficult!” Arven shouted back.

“I’m not even trapped in here really! I could get out if I wanted! I’m just respecting your agency right now! By remaining trapped in your trap thing!” Kaito shouted.

“Oh yeah? Well, go ahead, get out then! I’ll wait!”

Arven waited as Kaito looked around uncertainly, before pushing on the dresser again. The mirror held firm. Kaito pouted. 

“...Doppio said I’m projecting my self-hatred onto you?” Kaito said, while Arven internally pumped his fist. Knew it! He was trapped! “That’s a leap from just saying I’m too aggressive with you.”

“Is it true?” Arven asked, raising an eyebrow. “And if it is, knock it off. I don’t know what you’re seeing in me that reminds me of you, but it’s a total delusion. I’m nothing like you.”

“Sure, nothing like me now, maybe,” Kaito muttered, still pushing on the dresser. Man, that was good and wedged. “And even then, this feels like you and I maybe have the same ‘extra’ mentality about proving points. That’s definitely something we’d have in common. Though I’d have showed it with a grand speech and not this nonsense.”

“My way’s clearly better,” Arven said smugly.

“Pfff. My speeches are fantastic, kid. I get things done with a few good speeches, it’s my damn super power.”

“I thought you said buying things and filling out your weird health sex card tally were your superpowers.”

Kaito looked alarmed at that, before scratching his chin. “Oh, shoot, did I say that in front of you guys? Damn, I seriously gotta watch what I ramble about, where. I swear that stuff just falls out of me, like dandruff… Arven, what are you hoping for right now? Is this about getting an apology? Okay, ya know what, you’re right, I probably do owe you an apology–”

“I want to know what the heck I’m supposed to have in common with you.” Arven frowned, realizing in the moment that was bothering him more than he had expected. “We’re nothing alike, I can’t even imagine what you’re seeing.”

“Oh, um…” Kaito shifted uncomfortably on the desk top, “...well. We’re both very protective over the people we care about. And we get attached quickly. Like, waaaaay too quickly.”

“No I don’t,” Arven said, tilting his head, “Where did you get that idea? I barely get close to anyone.”

“Kid, you fell for Doppio in, what, two days? Three at most? And you’ve fallen hard. You literally ran away with him.”

“Aceto’s an exception to the rule. I’ve never felt this way about anyone before.”

“Then you fall in love for the same reasons I do, at least initially,” Kaito said, “You get drawn in by someone really, genuinely needing your help, and then stay because you find out they’re confident and cool and funny even despite all of the shit that’s happened to them. A superhero that needs saving? That’s our catnip, kid.”

“Maybe that’s your catnip. This has literally only happened to me once. You’re projecting.”

“Ugh, fine,” Kaito said, giving up on pushing the dresser, leaning back on the desk again. “Okay, you know what else? You’re a tough little asshole with an aggressive side you have to keep in check.”

“I’m only aggressive when people deserve it–”

“And you’re lonely,” Kaito said, “You’re the kind of lonely that drives someone crazy. That makes people act out. The kind of lonely that becomes half of your personality, and drives almost every decision you make. And you’re in love. For the first time, at 15. And if you’re anything like me when I was 15 and lonely and in love, you’d do literally anything for the other person. Anything they asked. You’d change your whole life, change who you are, go through any hoop or obstacle or test imaginable for the chance to prove yourself to them. And if that relationship fails, you’re gonna fall apart. It’ll shred you.”

“...” Arven frowned. “You don’t know that.”

“You can’t be that lonely and be normal about your relationships, kid.” Kaito sighed, leaning against the wall, giving Arven a tired look. “They become your everything. And they make you act stupid. Possessive and mean. Because you know what life is like without them, and you’d rather be an asshole than go back to that…”

Arven stared at Kaito, before tsking. Turning his head. “You don’t know that. I am not a jerk to Aceto. You keep acting like I’m just suddenly gonna start being mean to him.”

“...ngh.” Kaito winced. “...you’re right. And, honestly, that might be more me looking at Doppio and seeing my smallest husband. Kokichi really struggled in his first relationship too. I’d love to spare Doppio the pitfalls of some of the more toxic sides of new relationships. Especially when he’s also lonely and clinging. And doesn’t know what’s healthy and what’s controlling… But I do worry about you, Arven. Maybe it’s not as obvious to you and Doppio, how I worry about you, but there’s other aspects to seeing myself in you that I don’t want you to fall into, and I’ve been trying to help with.”

“Great. There’s more?” Arven said dryly.

“...” Kaito sighed, “Like I said… you’re protective. And you’ve fallen in love fast, with someone who’s, frankly, got a lot going on right now. A lot of things that, because you care about him so much, you might feel like it’s some personal responsibility to handle all of that, be a… crisis manager, or a personal, bedside healer, or a constant, vigilant guard–”

“That’s not weird,” Arven insisted, “Doppio and I promised to take care of each other. That’s what couples do.”

“It is! And I love that, that you two have talked about that… but being any of those things to each other are neither of your jobs,” Kaito stressed, “And I don’t want you, either of you, falling into this trap of thinking it is. Because that’s too much on a person! It shouldn’t feel like it’s up to you to save Doppio from his boss by going on the run together after he’s just had serious medical issues, and your own foot is broken and no one even knows. Same way as you shouldn’t have had to take care of your dog all on your own, or that house! Same way, honestly, that Doppio shouldn’t have felt like he was personally responsible to be some incredible, never tiring, never wavering personal assistant to some overgrown manbaby! You’re both kids! Even if you want to help, your help should always be secondary to the real assistance everyone else, the adults in your life, can give you! It should never feel like if you don’t handle it yourself, you’re doomed! That’s not fair!”

“Uh, okay?” Arven said, leaning back, a little surprised at the aggression in Kaito’s voice. “I believe you, you don’t have to shout…”

“Oh, uh… sorry. Sorry,” Kaito muttered. Looking down at his hands, which, yep, there they went. Shaking again. Massaging his joints a little, Kaito admitted, “Okay, maybe I’m projecting… I just want to protect you, kid. I want to protect you from becoming anyone’s everything, and I want to protect you from feeling like you need to make Doppio your everything. It’ll hurt you. It’ll make you an ugly version of yourself. I just… You’re so independent. And really strong-willed. I feel like if I’m not sterner with you, you’re not gonna hear me at all. And I don’t know if anyone else is ever gonna say anything like this to you.”

Arven paused, considering all of that… before saying slowly, “So you think…. If you don’t personally take care of it… it’s gonna mean you doomed me to failure?”

“...”

“Like it’s all your personal responsibility?” Arven asked, admittedly feeling a little smug as that was met with silence too. “And you need to protect this person who seems to need help, even though he’s confident and is capable himself?”

“..........” Kaito pouted, “Well, at least I’m self aware about it.”

“Sure, to an extent.” Arven shrugged, before smirking. “Admit it, I’ve got you pegged.”

“Alright, well, it sounds better when you say it,” Kaito muttered. “...I care about you, Arven.”

“I’m starting to gather that, yes. Though the way you show care is way too aggressive.”

“Maybe. And it’s not something I can turn off. I just care now,” Kaito said. “My parents stopped talking to me too. They didn’t disappear, they couldn’t, but we stopped talking essentially when I was 12. I remember how lonely that was. How insecure it made me. Them losing faith in me, interest in me? Made my other relationships harder… I know you’ve gotten to a point where you think you don’t need a relationship like that. Where someone older than you is taking a serious interest, consistently. I was the same. I didn’t even recognize the adults in my life, trying to fill that void, because technically I outranked all of them and I could just ignore them if I wanted to… that was bad for me. Being able to ignore everyone looking for me in my teenage angst. I just don’t want to let you do that. It’s bad for you.”

Arven rolled his eyes. “Sure. You totally understand what it’s like to be my age. Things so weren’t different thirty or whatever years ago.”

Kaito felt a little confused by that number. Okay, well, that sure was an exaggeration… “Fine, you don’t have to believe me. But I’m not giving up on you! And, I’m gonna make sure no one else does either! Lake’s only the beginning, kid! I’m gonna recruit so many people to look out for you! You’re about to be raised by a damn village if I have my way!”

“Yeah, yeah…” Arven said, unable to help a little, amused smile. It was still totally unnecessary and invasive, but… it was weird. Arven didn’t… dislike. Being threatened to be cared about. It was weird but… a nice kind of weird. Arven didn’t know. He felt both exasperated and warm. 

“...anyway. Just stop assuming I’m being mean to Aceto. That is absolutely you seeing things that aren’t there. If anything, when it comes to the sort of stuff you’re worried about, it’s Aceto needing to reassure me that we don’t need to rush ahead with stuff, okay? I’m not pushing him into anything.”

“Right… yeah, okay, that one is just me assuming you’re like me in worse ways. Okay. I’m sorry, Arven,” Kaito said softly, “You’re a good kid. I don’t really think you’d hurt Doppio. I’m sorry that I treated you like you would.”

“Thank you~” Arven said, smiling brightly… before turning around. “Well, good luck finding your fish tank.”

“Arven? Arven, you’re gonna unwedge the mirror, right? Hey, my speech was good, we resolved this, for the most part… was there something else you wanted to hear or are you just being a jerk? Arven?”

The door clicked shut.

“ARVEN YOU COME BACK HERE RIGHT NOW YOUNG MAN! I WILL LITERALLY GROUND YOU! THEY’RE GONNA FIND YOU BURIED TO YOUR CHIN IN THE GARDEN! ARVEN!?” Kaito shouted, glaring past the opening at the door… before sighing. “Alright, it’s a pretty good prank. Jerk. Hopefully ‘Kichi will peek in my brain soon… at least Shuichi and Waku know where I am… uuuuugh.”

….well, he was stuck in here anyway. Kaito opened up the box next to him, looking with new interest at the nudie magazines he had found buried inside. Oooooh… this one opened up into a three page spread… helloooo handsome~

It took a little time, but not terribly long before there was a knock on the door, a beat, and then the door opening, Hideki idly looking around before he spotted Kaito. Raising an eyebrow at…whatever this was. 

“Kaito,” the older man greeted. “Kokichi said you were trying to set up a fish tank. I have a filter pump for you, if there wasn’t one in the tank here…”

He trailed off, looking again at Kaito just…reading magazines in a furniture fort. “...if you were still looking?”

“Gah!” Kaito shouted, his whole body jolting again, the magazine flying up into the air, before Kaito quickly scrambled to grab it, throwing it back into the box and then slamming the box closed, and then on top of that, clutching it to his chest, like it might just pop open and spill its contents if he wasn’t careful. “Huh!? Eh!? Oh! Oh?? Oh!” 

Kaito grinned, pushing the box aside– out of view from where you could see past the the dresser– and giving Hideki an embarrassed wave. “Oh, okay! A filter would be great! I haven't found the tank yet though, I, uh… got stuck. Some items fell when I was moving things around, uh, I think there’s a mirror wedging the dresser against the desk I’m on? I didn’t want to break the furniture unless I was desperate, so… was hoping someone would come by! Annnnnd here you are! Amazing!”

Kaito glanced at Hideki’s arms, unable to really see their definition through his clothes, before saying a tad uncertainly, “The mirror’s stuck pretty tight, I think. Maybe you could go get someone to move it?”

Hideki watched the grand trajectory of the magazine with a raised eyebrow. It was really none of his business, what Kaito wanted to read in his own time, but that was…quite the reaction. 

“Oh? …hm, I see,” Hideki nodded, following Kaito’s explanation and seeing the issue. It…looked a bit more than just furniture falling together, though. It looked rather deliberate, actually. Though…Hideki couldn’t fathom a reason Kaito would try to trap himself…

“If you aren’t in any distress, I may do that, but allow me to see if I can move it myself.” Navigating farther into the room, Hideki set the tank pump he was carrying down on an old file cabinet before looking at the mirror, judging how it was jammed in… And, nodding to himself, he reached over to start trying to tug it out. 

“...I realize this isn’t a great time, considering you are literally unable to leave, and it might sound insulting, coming from me, but…” Hideki’s eyebrows drew in as he gave a heftier tug, the mirror starting to slide out. “...are you alright? No one did this to you on purpose, did they?”

“What? Naaaaaah.” Kaito grinned, rubbing the back of his neck, watching as Hideki actually seemed to be managing to pry the mirror loose. Neat. “...well, okay, maybe, but it’s just a kid being a kid. I only mention it cause he seems to have a thing for pranking, so if he pulls something on someone else, maybe don’t assume it was Kokichi or Timothy. He’s the teen we’ve got staying on the first floor? Arven. Just a bit of youthful, uh… theatrics.”

“But I’m fine! Someone would have come and found me eventually. And you did! That’s great!” Kaito grinned, tapping at the top of the box next to him. “Thanks for asking! Nothing insulting about that! Juuuuuust don’t leave me here as a fun jape and we are all good!”

“Ah, yes, Arven. Professor Sada’s son…for however much that title is worth,” Hideki huffed, though mostly from giving the mirror one last tug, prying it loose. “If this was caused by a prank, then I understand--I had been worried someone was harassing you. But, no, this is…rather common for the castle as well,” Hideki hummed, amused. 

Alright, now the dresser. “...has Kokichi ever told you of the time he loosened all the office doorknobs? One could just push on the door itself when they fell off, of course, but our main meeting room used to have a slanted hinge, which prevented the door from opening unless you lifted the door as you opened it. I believe I was stuck in the office for about four hours until someone noticed.”

There was an odd noise from the secretary at that. It almost sounded amused. “Toshio never let me live it down that I completely neglected the fact there were windows.”

Kaito gave Hideki a curious look– he was concerned Kaito was being harassed… really? Hm.-- before cheering as he heard the mirror pop up off the wall. “You did it! Heck yeah! Ya know, I think ‘Kichi told me once you were strong. Something about, like, Dicean debate fight… spar things? He told me you get into a lot of fights during a special fighting holiday you guys have. Guess I’m seeing proof of that training! That thing was wedged tight!”

Kaito couldn’t really push the dresser without potentially tilting it onto Hideki, so he resisted the urge to try to help move it as his eyebrows shot up, groaning, “Oh, ‘Kichi, no. Ah, shoot, did he really? I mean, I guess he had no way of knowing the door wouldn’t open, but I hope he didn’t leave you locked in there that long on purpose. That’s a rough prank.”

Kaito tilted his head, smirking. “Unless you just decided to spend four hours doing paperwork, rather than, say, literally opening a window? You strike me as the kind of guy that would ignore a window, not miss it. Though, I’m sure your partner still had loads of fun pointing it out.”

“My nephew may have been too generous, then, if that’s how he described it,” Hideki grunted as he slowly wiggled the dresser back. “I primarily ‘lose’ my declared Epakohta fights…if you want to define a loss that way. I am more of a ‘flailingly grapple and hope for the best’ type of combatant, rather than any style that focuses on strength.”

Shaking his head a little, Hideki smiled fondly, though with a long-cooled hint of irritation. “Kokichi never meant for his mischievousness to ever hurt anyone. I actually had meant to never mention to him that I had gotten stuck, but after Ikuo heard he prompted a confrontation so Kokichi could better face the consequences of his actions.” The fondness clearly won out there. “I did end up with a little shadow for a few days after that. I believe Kokichi felt protective and responsible, and so took it upon himself to make sure I did not become trapped in any more rooms. Our record of Pen Chrysanthemums did not last long, though it was a good effort.”

Having moved the dresser enough to approach it from the front--allowing Kaito to push as well--Hideki returned the smirk. “He did, though it was a bit of a mixture of your hypotheses. The reason I was the only one trapped was because I had stayed behind to finish up some finalizing paperwork…and in between my attempts to open the door without a handle, and calling for help, I simply continued on with my work. It did not occur to me to add the window into the rotation.”

“...” Kaito squinted uncertainly at Hideki, as he shifted forward to help push the dresser now, it pretty simple now that both of them were able to push. As it slid like butter back to the wall, Kaito grinned. “Free! Yay, thank you… though, uh… chyrabanadbunam?” Kaito tried, giving Hideki an uncertain look, “Wait, was that one word? Penchandamanumum?”

Hideki gave a nod, stepping back as he dusted off his hands. “You’re welcome. I hope you weren’t stuck for terribly long.” Though he just squinted back at Kaito. “Chrysanthemum. It’s a type of flower, about 40 types, actually--genus of the same name, and in the aster family. They have an impressive number of inter-stacked petals per bloom, and are often associated with friendship. Pen Chrysanthemums is an informal office game, where you attempt to lace and balance as many pens as you can into a standard cooler cup.”

“...a common name for them is ‘mum’, if the pronunciation is too difficult.” 

Kaito had been struggling for a second there, trying to understand what the flowers had to do with a baby Kokichi, running around being a little baby Ouma guardian angel… before oooooooh, okay! It was an office game, that made sense…

Starting to feel a little stupid, Kaito waved his hands slightly, looking away. “No, no, I can say it! Pen Chy… Chysan… Pen Chysantheium!” Kaito said triumphantly, certain that was correct, though he was careful not to glance at Hideki in case the expression he saw suggested he wasn’t. “Of course, obviously! We have a different name for it in Luminary, the uh, both, the flowers and the game! That’s all! Fun little cultural differences!”

Reaching for the filter, Kaito looked it over, before nodding his head politely at Hideki. “Thank you for the water filter, along with my rescue. Did you have an aquarium? Or just knew where something like this was?”

“Also, I’m sure you’re not giving yourself enough credit on the spars! Kokichi says you get challenged a ton every year! You must know some moves, after that much experience.” Kaito grinned, feeling more confident to meet Hideki’s eyes this time. “I don’t think I’m allowed to participate, but next time the holiday rolls around Kokichi and I will come cheer you on!”

Well. It was close. And there was no point in calling Kaito out on his odd double-down of a lie, other than to simply antagonize his nephew’s husband. And…Hideki was trying, specifically, not to do that. 

“I knew where one was. There had been some talk of getting an office aquarium for the main secretarial office, however no one particularly wanted to take care of fish, and one of our staff professed a disdain for the sound of burbling water, so the idea was discarded. Thankfully, this filter may find use for you.”

Hideki tilted his head a little. “For a time.”

Kokichi had been…in quite a tizzy, when he’d asked for some help. Hideki had never personally heard of having clams for pets, but it was well within the realms of possibility, and he had promised to do some rudimentary research to help out. 

Humming a bit, Hideki walked more towards the door, not wanting to crowd Kaito. “Is that so? It might be worth checking up on your restrictions. Given your clean record since following through with your mandated therapy sessions, I would think that most bans would be softened, if not lifted. But it is a personal choice to participate in Epakohta regardless.”

“As it is to watch,” he smirked. “Kokichi I know is not much of a fan, but I would not spoil your fun if you settled down with some snacks to watch me get punched in the face.”

“Really?” Kaito asked, as he shifted to the edge of the desk, letting his legs hang over, “I kinda assumed most of those restrictions were like… really long term. Um…” Kaito swung his legs a little, his feet threading the floor. “...do you have any guess at, theoretically, how long a weapons ban might last? Uh, and… do you happen to, theoretically, know if I… have. That? A weapons ban?”

“.....and theoretically what does that actually mean not that I don’t know or anything because if I have a weapons ban I have absolutely, uh, been… aware of that this whole time and following it! Explicitly!” Kaito said, eyes wide a little, “Theoretically!”

Kaito smiled lightly at the, well, sorta joke, nonjoke, before rubbing the back of his neck a little. “Ah, turns out I’m not a big fan of watching old guys getting beaten up. Turns out I like that in theory way more than I like it in practice… asssss theoretical as my question about weapons bans,” Kaito said, a tad dryly. He knew he wasn’t being convincing. He just wanted to be able to argue that he hadn’t really said he hadn’t been following any potential weapon bans, if a guard happened to suddenly show up to his room. “Turns out I like talking shit out. Wild and crazy, I know, but apparently that’s what I’m into.”

“...it is not a crime to not understand what restrictions apply to you, you know,” Hideki raised an eyebrow, after a moment of silence. “Willful ignorance is not a passable defense in court against a new crime, but it is not something that would get you arrested on its own. As I understand your case…your particular restrictions had the potential to be effective long term, had there not been evidence your rehabilitative measures were working.”

Giving Kaito a short nod, he summarized, “You haven’t been arrested again, or cautioned with any misdemeanor, nor have you been reported as abusing any type of drug, and your therapist signed off on the completion of your government mandated sessions months ago. That is…while you still may have sessions, and even ones focusing on anger management, your therapist has declared in good faith that you are not a danger to the public. And that means that while you may get into a fight or other altercation, any instance of a violent incident would be treated with the assumption that there was a fair instigation, and not that it was a reflection of any deeper issues.”

“You have demonstrably proved to society and a mental health expert that you can peacefully live within this society--there is no reason to continually “punish” you for something you’ve worked past. Legally speaking.”

With a shrug, Hideki gave Kaito a fair look. “That’s why I suggest taking a look at your restrictions yourself. You likely don’t have any ‘bans’ left, but you may still have cautions.” With a slightly kinder look, Hideki…attempted a small smile. “Though having honest conversations with yourself, and what would be best for yourself is likely more important, at this stage. If you would not enjoy observing fights, or you think it would cause you undue stress? You do not have to go see them, regardless of if you can legally or not.”

Kaito had been worried about that. That admitting he hadn’t been following the weapons ban, however that worked, might land him further punishments. Kokichi had told him repeatedly now that isolation hadn’t ever really been on the cards for Kaito, but it was still something that worried him. He really couldn’t afford to go anywhere by this point, there were so many people he had to look out for…

It was a relief to hear, honestly. Kaito wasn’t sure who he was supposed to ask about what he was restricted from or ‘cautioned’ against or anything like that, but maybe he could safely ask Kokichi now. He loved his husband, but he could be a little tattle-tale sometimes. If Kaito had been doing it wrong and was going to get in trouble, Kokichi would probably be the first to tell someone official. He’d also be certain to protect Kaito through the process, absolutely, but Kaito still hadn’t wanted to risk it. 

“Yeah, that’s a good point,” Kaito said, giving Hideki a newly curious look, “...if you can’t fight, and you don’t have to, why do you go at all? You’re like a thousand years old, you really shouldn’t be letting people just punch you because they feel like it.”

Hideki gave Kaito a dry look. “...I’m 43.” But he sighed, easing up on the look. “You may have a point soon, however. I can’t take it as well as I used to…but I am not quitting before Aiichi does, a major health issue willing.” Gritting his teeth a little, Hideki’s eyebrow twitched. “I can accept ‘old man’ jokes from you and the other children. I will not give that manchild more fodder.”

“...but to truly answer your question? People enjoy it,” Hideki shrugged. “There are always people frustrated with the government, and I have long been aware I am not as personable as Aiichi, for how comparable we are as figurehead symbols of the government. If I can give peace to people’s frustrations, Epakohta is a method I have been able to use. …and it allows me to vent the, at times, infuriatingly belligerent and willfully ignorant ways people choose, or refuse, to interact with government.”

“You don’t have to lie about your age to me, I think older men can be very attractive. It’s nothing to be ashamed of,” Kaito reassured him. Was he joking? That was for him to know. 

Though, he went quiet, observing Hideki talk about venting frustration, and being vented on. It wasn’t something that Kaito could still quite equal in the two Dicean dignitaries. It felt too barbaric for them. But, seeing Kokichi beat Tengan down with a cane was making it slightly easier for Kaito to accept the idea that maybe Diceans did indulge in that mindset, sometimes. In the same way that seeing it indulged could make a Luminary uncomfortable, sometimes. The world was funny that way.

“... if I hadn’t gotten myself banned last year, you think you would have wanted to challenge me?” Kaito asked.

Hideki rolled his eyes a bit, but didn’t comment, his peace-keeping attempts still going strong. Though he did give Kaito a curious look before crossing his arms, putting the question to genuine consideration. 

“...perhaps,” Hideki nodded. “With everything else the same, it still would have been a bad idea with everything that was going on…but purely based on emotion? I believe so. In anger, it was easy to blame you for the harm Luminary has done to me, and I would have wanted to express that.”

Hideki looked over with a tired, regretful expression. “I did express that. In a much worse way than our informed and agreed upon holiday would’ve allowed. You didn’t deserve that, Kaito, and while I have apologized before…you have my apologies again.”

Leaning against the doorframe, Hideki let go of a bone-weary sigh. “...I hate the winters here. Too damn cold.”

“...that’s alright,” Kaito said… before his brow furrowed. “No, no. Shit, I can’t… just say that. I say that every time we talk about this, hoping this time I’ll feel better about it, and I never fucking do. I know you mean it, you know why I’m angry, technically we both already know everything and that’s great! Fine! Maybe we don’t actually need to have a conversation to learn anything fucking new about this.”

“But I also fucking know we’ve tried to apologize and understand each other twice now, and each time I go away not feeling any better about anything. The best I feel is maybe fucking numb, or stupid and disappointed… and I can’t wait for another broken teenager to show up so that I can take the latest person I’m trying to repair a busted relationship with me on a heartfelt journey of emotional growth!” Kaito shouted, thumping his fists together as he said, “They don’t just fall into your lap all the time! It’s a really niche situation, ya can’t depend on stuff like that!”

“...ahem,” Kaito cleared his throat again, resting his fists together on his lap and looking away, a little embarrassed at the outburst, before saying, “I don’t know… Did any of those conversations make you feel any better? Maybe this is just a fucking me problem. I don’t know. They felt really hollow to me.”

Hideki raised an eyebrow as Kaito went on a rant, but…

“...hollow, hm?” The older man sighed. “I did feel better, at least giving a try to mend some of my mistakes, when it comes to you. For as much as you made your disdain apparent, I did not enjoy knowing that I had…pin-pointedly hurt you, just to release some of my own pain. Trying to make amends for that felt right, to me.”

“You wouldn’t be the first to feel as though my words are performative,” he gave Kaito a tired shrug. “But experience has not given me a better answer for it. I do regret how I treated you, and your anger from it was justified. And I do hope for better relations between us, due to the dear person we have in common.”

“Great, cool, good! Good! I… Thank you! Genuinely!” Kaito said, before pointing accusingly at Hideki, “But you were a jackass to me! And not just the stupid fucking bullshit at that weird shadow timetable place, I mean! I mean, fuck, I baited you into that fight, I wanted that fight so badly! If that was the only thing, I wouldn’t still be acting like a damn crybaby about all of this! I’m… not unreasonable! I’m allowed to be angry! So long as I, ya know, handle that anger in a non-destructive way and try to communicate clearly and honestly about it! And stuff! Therapy stuff!”

Kaito paused, mentally going over how this exchange was going, before nodding confidently. “This is a reasonable way to express myself! I think!”

And feeling emboldened, he continued accusingly, “My brand new, stranger husband, had just passed out in the middle of a difficult conversation from the damn… damn rape-drug heart attack he had just had! In a bed that I couldn’t even bring myself to get close to, because I had no idea what I was supposed to be doing to help him, o-or if something I’d do would hurt him, or if he’d even really want me there once he was clear headed, and what was I supposed to do if he relapsed, and was I about to be arrested o-or were my friends coming back, because everyone else sure as fuck was leaving, and you!” Kaito said, pointing again, “Came in all giddy with terrible news! And I know to you it wasn’t terrible! But I started crying, man!? And you… left me! To just figure it out!”

“And I know, I know, you’re like emotionally constipated or something, but you couldn’t have sent someone to come check on us!? Sure, not for my sake, but Kokichi was just lying there! What if I had left him alone!? What if I had needed some time to get over the bombshell you had just dropped on me, or the shitty wedding I had just been forced through, or, fuck, what if I just needed to go walk around, or find my missing friends, or… I didn’t know what to do, and you left me there to sit and cry next to a stranger whose life I felt responsible for with no damn safety net! And you were the only person who had any idea I needed any help in that moment! And you left me!”

“S-so… so! So, yeah!” Kaito said, gripping his hands into fists, “Your apology sounded performative! Cause I don’t think you have any idea why we don’t get along!”

Hideki listened, and…he did know that their first…well, he hesitated to even call it a real conversation, but it was something like one, hadn’t gone well. But as Kaito went on, a genuinely surprised look showed its shadow on Hideki’s face before he frowned. Something truly frustrated running through him. 

And he opened his mouth…then shut it. A rare form of the secretary hesitating with his words. 

“...I’m sorry. This…” He sighed, his frown tightening before he revised his words again. “This will sound cruel. And I am sorry for that too. But you are correct. I did not recognize you as needing help, then. So I never sent any. And my failure to understand you caused you a great deal of pain…and I’m sorry for that.”

Something a little exasperated entered green eyes. “This one I now know is utterly absurd, in my interpretation, so it does not even qualify as an explanation--which, while they may sound so, I am not trying to offer excuses for my actions. Only to explain my own part in it.” Hideki sighed, that bone-weary feeling in him…but this time with a small spark of anger. Something that had been crushed and smothered countless times, but never truly died. “...I truly thought that the news from Luminary would be a relief for you. When we got word from the ambassadors… I will not make you sit through our reactions to your pain, but we truly thought exposing it would be in goodwill. Fulfilling our duties as exemplified in the treaty already, allowing justice for your family, and indeed your country, to prevail. And…I will not lie, it felt justified, to “have” something on that creature Tengan. We did not intend or expect the scandal to be reflected upon you.”

“...I thought I was bringing you some needed good news,” Hideki summed up, an apology in his nod to Kaito.

“And perhaps it is simply another sign of ignorance I still haven’t outgrown, that this next point feels more explanatory than the last, but… Simply? I did not expect you to stay with Kokichi.” Hideki shrugged gently. “He would often fall asleep mid-conversation during his bouts of illness, so it did not strike me as concerning, and given that you refused an in-room healer to stay and supervise…many of us figured that that was where you would rather be. And that a healer would come by once you left. But you didn’t leave.”

Here, Hideki did wince a bit. “...and for your tears…I thought you would rather be alone. It is what I would have wanted.”

“Before I am misunderstood, I am not intending to place the blame of your pain upon your own actions,” Hideki quickly got in, holding up a hand…before he gently turned it towards himself. “Rather…I am trying to explain that I failed to recognize your needs, and how the situation was in your shoes. And…seeing that now?”

His voice softened. “...I am sorry. You were placed in our country’s care, precariously. And, personally, I have failed to care for you. You deserved better…and your outrage at not receiving it is justified.” 

“...” Kaito’s shoulders fell, nodding a little, though he murmured softly, “How could I leave him? He was my husband… I had a duty to him…”

“...I kinda knew all of that already,” Kaito admitted, looking down at his hands, feeling much calmer about all of this, if a little sad. “‘Kichi’s told me some of it, and you’ve told me other pieces. Lake told me too. I… understand you all better now, and that really does help. No one was trying to be cruel. Hell, I don’t think anyone really understood what we… what I was tackling, at the time. There was so much going on, and I was so overwhelmed…”

“...it’s taken me a long time to admit to myself that I was really failing to keep it together, through all of that,” Kaito said softly. “A few months ago, I think partly due to therapy and partly from Kokichi helping me through some stuff, it all kinda hit me all at once, how badly I had struggled with everything those first few months? And once that hit me, it was like… it was like going a little crazy, honestly. Remembering what had happened actually hurt way more than going through it. Because time had given me space to really acknowledge it all, and… and it was all so much…”

“And I hated you, for a while,” Kaito admitted, “Like, really hated. You, uh… you got really twisted around, in my head. Because I didn’t actually understand why I hated you? Because I couldn’t really understand how badly I was handling everything, so a part of me kept thinking I was just…” Kaito closed his eyes, a rush of frustration running through him. “...proving how ‘evil’ I actually was. Because only an evil person would be so mean and angry at people who had done nothing wrong, and were just trying to help, and were so much more… perfect than me… Everyone was so much better than me, and I couldn’t get along, and I hated them, so there had to be something vile in me. It was the only thing that made sense. That there had to be something wrong with me…”

“...one of the ways I tried to rationalize how ‘irrational’ I was feeling,” Kaito said, rolling his eyes a little, “Was by thinking I was just… seeing you as Tengan. You guys seemed the same to me, for a while. Head Secretaries playing head games, who wanted to shove in my face how fucking… stupid and wrong I was. How fundamentally, like… inferior I was. Not in comparison to the brilliant, shining heir apparents I was always standing next to. Byakuya, Kokichi… Who wouldn’t look like garbage, being compared to them…”

Kaito swallowed, trying to ease the swirling unease in his stomach, before he opened his eyes, looking a tad guiltily at Hideki. “But that wasn’t really why I was angry with you. That was me, just, inventing things about you to try to rationalize the anger I already had that I didn’t understand. And in a way, what I invented was a lot worse than the problems that had actually happened between us. You’re not really comparable to Tengan, even at your worst, but because I had made the two of you the same in my head, it really made it hard for me to understand you or forgive you for the things you did actually do.”

“So I’m sorry that the last two conversations we had were kinda under false pretenses. I still hadn’t entirely comprehended why I was upset with you, and worse, the bits I did understand I just refused to actually talk to you about. I don’t know, I just wanted you to guess, I guess. To just ‘know’ somehow, how bad it had all been. Shit, you probably still have no idea everything else that happened the day we fought. I was lashing out at you because I was pissed at Kokichi… I was furious with him. But I didn’t feel like I had any right to yell at him. Cause, ya know… wasn’t good enough and all that… so I did the shitty Momota thing and tried to take it out on someone just lower ranking enough…” Kaito frowned, “Or at least someone who wasn’t my sick, tiny, sobbing husband who seemed barely convinced I was even a person, by that point… Fuck, that was such a hard day… you couldn’t have known though. That wasn’t your fault.”

“...and I’m sorry you ever have had to apologize to someone like me,” Kaito said. “You were wrong, but… I’m a Luminary. The ex-second son, for that matter. You should have been able to confront me about… about what happened to your partner. Because as a member of the royal family, I do have a responsibility to that. I should have answered for that. And I’m sorry you haven’t gotten any closure on that. I wish I could give you that. I wish things had been different between us.”

Hideki wrinkled his nose a bit, hearing himself be compared to Kazuo Tengan. He could understand it, by their titles and, well, relative positions of power, in a sense, to Kaito but…ew. He wouldn’t argue with those who accused him of being cold hearted, but Hideki liked to think he wasn’t a monster.

There was a muted sad, pitying look as Kaito explained how ‘evil’ he had thought of himself as, and his struggles with being compared to, not only Kokichi, but Byakuya, in a similar mental compartment, it seemed like, and how that affected his anger and ability to process that anger and what happened…

It was a shitstorm of a situation, really. And neither of them had been much help in trying to sort it out. 

As usual, Hideki was starting to see when it came to their family problems, it was Kokichi and a loooot of therapy that actually managed to help. 

Hideki accepted Kaito’s explanation of his own side and…

…

The older man sighed. Giving Kaito a tired, sad look. A hurt that had only been softened with time. “...you may be a Momota, Kaito…but you didn’t kill Toshio. You were a child, at the time, and regardless of what your duty means in Luminary…to me, that burden doesn’t fall to you. And I should apologize to you, because I wronged you. And that’s my duty…as a person.”

“...” Hideki smiled grimly, tipping his head back on the doorframe. “...please do not take this as a sign of guilt, because I’ve long since worked past it, personally… But in a sense? Just like it harmed you, my own naivety killed Toshio too. My inability to understand others…and all my caution I could’ve ever mustered wasn’t enough to combat his lack of caution, in the name of understanding others. Our balance out of sync.” 

…it had felt like that for a while. After Honoka and Yui. After Miyako. 

“...I don’t think I can forgive Toshio’s death, Kaito,” Hideki said softly. “But it’s not your burden to carry. Nor is it your countrymen. Those responsible, I believe, are no longer in any position for me to make demands of. So it is simply a pain for me to carry.”

“...but his joy is mine to carry as well, and…I find that it is much stronger, most days.” He offered a small smile.

Kaito gave Hideki a soft look. In truth, he knew he couldn’t really understand. He didn’t know what he would feel, if he lost either of his husbands. If he lost Maki. If he lost his children… it felt cursed to even try to imagine it. Kaito afraid of tempting a fate that would likely destroy him. 

And knowing that, and seeing Hideki just… have to keep living? After that destruction? As Kaito himself would likely have to, if the worst truly did ever happen?

He couldn’t understand. Not really.

“I’m sorry you lost him,” Kaito said softly, “And I’m happy that you still have something of him. I wish you had him, instead. But I’m glad you have something.”

“....” Kaito licked his lips, not sure if this would be appreciated at all, but, “...my… father was a bastard. An unhappy, miserable, perverted asshole who ruined everything he touched. He was a bastard… I… I don’t know if…” Kaito winced, forcing himself to say it, “...if anyone loved him, when he died. I don’t think anyone did. He died hated and alone.”

“...just… so you know,” Kaito said softly.

“Thank you,” Hideki said quietly. 

He knew he hadn’t given such a…livable view the last time they had talked on this subject. Winter was always so difficult… Perhaps that was what always gave him the energy, when Epakohta came around, to manifest his anger. 

At the time…Hideki really had believed that suffering was all there was. When they got the news, he had disappeared for nearly a week before someone found him and he had to be hospitalized. Hideki had just…stopped. And even after being released from the hospital, he was just…stuck. In shock or…just finding no point in being in a world that didn’t have Toshio in it too. 

Toshio would’ve been heartbroken to hear him say something like that. To watch Hideki disappear from the world too. 

Because while his best friend had been his greatest light…there still was so much to live for. A whole world still to experience, even if he had to do it without the person he most wanted to. More music and language and food and fashion and…everything. Everything that made the world as loud and bright and chaotic as Hideki had always seen Toshio try to embody. 

And if they had one shot to live a life…Hideki wasn’t going to waste his, while he still had a chance. While he still had love in him. 

And, well, a vindictive streak that liked being proved right. 

A slight bit of a sneer twisted Hideki’s lips, before he laughed softly, giving Kaito a gentle look. “You didn’t need to do that for me…but thank you anyway.”

“Do you still intend to find that fish tank? I would offer my assistance, however I am needed back at work soon.” Thinking for a moment, Hideki tilted his head. “Would you like me to ask someone else to aid you?”

Kaito laughed, giving Hideki a fond look. “...ya know what? Literally just cause you offered. Yes please. I could use some help.”

Hideki offered him a smirk as he pushed off the doorframe. “Expect someone shortly, then. I wouldn’t go back to immediately reading those magazines unless you want to be startled again.”

“Thank you! …I’m keeping these magazines! If they belonged to the castle or something? I’m taking them! Just so someone official knows! Official magazine theft!” Kaito called after him, snickering. 

…for the first time. He really, genuinely felt better, after talking to Hideki. 

Kaito really did just like talking his problems out with people.

And it didn’t have to be the resident shitty person who Kaito wouldn’t care if they ‘judged him’ for needing to talk about it.

Huh.

Who’d have known.

-

Doppio considered it a miracle he hadn’t overslept. Waking up had been like punching up through several feet of snow, drowsiness clinging to him at every opportunity and daring to drag him back down if he gave so much as an inch. Really…he still felt kind of bad, and could absolutely crash for…a few more hours at least. But he’d made a promise, and Aceto Doppio was never late on dinner. 

(His timing wasn’t helped when he stopped in the bathroom to put his hair back up, and he just stared at his reflection for at least a solid three minutes. …Arven thought his ears were cute…)

But, at 5pm, he and Kaito were in the kitchen as promised, all their ingredients laid out. Cinching up the back of his apron, Doppio gave Kaito a firm, appraising look. “Alright! I…originally planned for this to be a meal you could make in under 40 minutes. The fish shouldn’t add too much time over, if we’re efficient, um, not that I estimate this will take 40 minutes,” Doppio amended, his brows drawing in, “Because I’m teaching you, so that’ll naturally take longer…but! With practice that’s the estimation!”

“We’re making lemon-pepper steaks, steamed purple rockcod over leeks, charred young broccoli, orzo pasta salad, and a chimichurri sauce…that’ll go on a few things, ‘cause ingredient stacking is efficient…but that’s the menu!”

Kaito was, currently, quite ecstatic, for many reasons.

He was still flying pretty high from his interaction with Hideki, and with Arven, for that matter. Sure, Arven had left him trapped in a storage closet, but Kaito was willing to interpret that as the kid just being fond enough to play jokes! Jokes of friendship and understanding! Ha ha! Kaito was not gonna bury him in the garden over it! 

He also had a box full of, uh, very fun new (well, new to him) magazines in his shrine now, along with a small fish tank he and Hajime had finally managed to pull out and clean from the storage closet! Along with the filter, his clams were now tucked away in his shrine, happy as… clams! That was even a saying! He was gonna be a great clam dad! He didn’t care that they were essentially meaty plants, like Arven had said, they made Kaito feel like he had finally gotten himself a nice little pet gift! He did it! 

And, finally, he had gotten to show Doppio what he had secretly also bought as a gift at the market. Not just a personal gift, but a gift to the world, as Kaito nodded along with what he was saying, pulling out some items out of his bag of ingredients. “I hear you, I hear you, that sounds perfect. But! Let’s protect those clothes of yours, right? Here, check it out!”

Kaito pulled out two aprons. One black, one pink. Both had drawings of cats on them, as Kaito grinned proudly. “Aprons! Which one do you want?”

Doppio paused, blinking. Looking at the two aprons, while his fingers were still pulling the strap of his borrowed one. …an apron was an apron, and even just draping a towel over yourself while you were cooking would help protect your clothes, but… His own apron hadn’t been in the basket of clothes he’d gotten. 

…those were pretty cute…

The straps were even striped like tabby tails…

Untying his borrowed apron, even if he’d just finished putting it on, Doppio nodded to the pink one. “...that one, please. Thanks, Kaito. Please wash your hands when you finish putting yours on, okay?”

“Will do, captain!” Kaito grinned, laughing as he tossed Doppio his apron, before putting his own on and tying it around. “It’s cute, right? I don’t mind putting on cute things every now and again, but I’ll be honest, I’m super hoping to convince my husbands into these someday. I’ll teach them how to make a dessert or something, this will be my reward! Seeing them in cute cat aprons!”

Heading over to the sink, Kaito took a second to ruffle Doppio’s hair first, giving him a wink as he said, “I’m sure Arven will think so too,” before going on to wash his hands. 

Doppio hummed softly as he put on the pink cat apron, smiling softly as he looked down to see the cat drawing. “Prince Kokichi said you guys made cookies together once? Is…Prince Shuuichi interested in cooking too? That seems…nice, if you could all cook together…”

Flushing a bit as Kaito mentioned Arven, Doppio glared half-heartedly before washing his own hands. But then! It was time to get to work. 

“Alright, first, let’s start the water for both the pasta and the steamer basket, since getting it to a boil will take the longest,” Doppio explained, taking out a pot and a, well, shorter-rimmed pot that he had found locked in with a proper steaming basket while he was looking at the kitchen supplies the other day. Heading to the sink, he explained, “A lot of the time, I’ve found, for pasta you don’t want that much more water than will cover the noodles, both just for getting a quicker boil, but also so there’s a higher concentration of starch in the leftover water, which is good for making smoother sauces. However, because this will be a pasta salad, we don’t need the leftover water, so that’s not much of a concern. For a steamer basket, it can depend on the food, but generally you just don’t want enough water that it gets in where the food is, and other than that, more water is better, since you don’t have to worry as much about the bottom pot running dry and burning.”

“Nah, not really. My Shuichi will tolerate pretending to learn to cook to spend time with us, but I doubt unless he physically has to he’ll ever pick up a skillet his entire life,” Kaito said, grinning as he said it. He honestly loved that Shuichi was a bit spoiled. Out of the loved ones in his life, Shuichi these days was the most willing to let Kaito spoil him. And Kaito was happy to take advantage, enjoying the feeling of catering to his fussy lover. He had always loved to be of use to his loved ones. “Kokichi, though, would absolutely try to learn! I don’t think he’d ever think to make anything himself, he doesn’t enjoy it like I do or need to learn like you did, but I’ve never seen my guy do anything half-heartedly.”

“...he uh…” Kaito glanced around the kitchen, making sure no one had joined them unexpectedly, before still saying quietly, like it was an amusing secret, “He probably wouldn’t be very good at it, though. Not his fault! But my Kokichi basically looks at everything in a kitchen like it’s some strange alien invention. Never really got familiar with them growing up. But that’s alright~” Kaito laughed, going to grab the drainer bowl so that it’d be ready for when they needed to clean the pasta. “Means I get to be more skilled than him in one thing, and I plan to take full advantage! Gonna wow him with foods for the rest of his life! Rub his face in my immaculate pies! And other stuff, pies are just the latest thing I learned so I just keep referencing them.” Kaito laughed.

“Okay, for the water, then, what are we thinking… this much?” Kaito asked, running the pot under the sink for a bit, before showing Doppio what he had collected, “Or is that still too little? You did say more the better, but I wouldn’t want it to overflow? Or are we not burning it that hot, that fast?”

“Also, how are you feeling now?” Kaito asked, “Did you nap? Did it help?”

Doppio hadn’t wanted to make a guess, since he really didn’t have any real evidence to go off of (other than the fact that Kokichi said Kaito was the only one that cooked, and that the one time he had referenced cooking together, Shuuichi wasn’t included), but…that was kind of the vibe he’d gotten off of Shuuichi. Doppio wouldn’t be able to define it, but he just…got the idea that Shuuichi would be perfectly happy receiving food from others his whole life. And given the enthusiasm he’d seen…Kokichi never having a drive to, but being excited to help cook was the vibe he’d gotten from the heir too. 

“It does take a lot of practice to get familiar with cooking,” Doppio nodded, giving Kaito a curious look as the prince lowered his voice. “Starting from zero would likely mean he’d be bad…but it does help a lot having someone more experienced give you help.” He tilted his head a little, their current situation case in point. 

Looking over at the pot Kaito had filled, lifting the pasta pot out of another sink himself, Doppio hummed approvingly. “That looks good to me--the risk of burning is really only if you forget about the pot. It’s just a safety measure. And we’re only going to bring it to a low boil, since we just need it to produce steam. Alright…could you bring it to this back burner, please? And set the flame to medium low, we’ll lower it once it starts boiling.” As he instructed Kaito, Doppio did similarly with the pasta pot, only turning the flame a bit higher and throwing in a good amount of salt.

Returning to the prep station, Doppio sighed softly. “I took a nap, yeah…think it helped. I’m feeling a lot better, comparatively…’n Arven helped with that too.” …it was really none of Kaito’s business, but… Looking away, a little embarrassed, Doppio quietly admitted, “I threw up during my shower.”

Kaito winced. “Oooooh, you did? Aw, kid. Are we thinking stomach bug, or just your stomach turning from the stress of the day? If it’s stomach bug, I think there’s certain kinds of drinks that could help, if you’re still feeling nauseous. Ever heard of ginger ale? I’m pretty certain Dicea has ginger ale, it’d be weird if you all didn’t. Swimming in herbs out here.” 

Doing as Doppio requested, Kaito set down the pot and turned on the burners, looking around for ways to make himself useful as he considered the prep work. “A ginger ale with some lime juice added to is perfect for nausea. Personally I was always a coffee guy when it came to hangovers, but my ex-girlfriend Monique swore by ginger ale and lime. She was such a fervent believer that just by default, I’d always offer my sick friends in the future to get them coffee or ginger ale with lime to help their stomachs. Not sure if anything actually helps or if it's just a nice way to nurse yourself while you wait for nausea to actually go away, but we can try it!”

“I think it’s just stress,” Doppio mumbled as he started laying out the Delmon steaks on the cutting boards. “Don’t really feel nauseous anymore… Just was…gross.”

“Alright, we’re going to salt each side of these. Some people pepper them at this stage too, but the flavor dulls with cooking, and I want it to be a more forward note, so we’re gonna add that later,” Doppio explained, grabbing a large pinch of salt with his non-meat hand and sprinkling it over two of the steaks, patting it in with his other, and leaving the other two for Kaito. “You’d also want to trim your steaks before this, but the butcher did a good job getting rid of excess stuff… And the fat caps on these are fine. They’ll add to the flavor, and, kinda, the amount of fat in your steak is personal preference. You just have to pay attention to the size and shape so you can render them properly.”

“We’re doing this to season, yeah, but also to draw out excess water from the steaks. Ideally, you’d want to do this the day before and leave them in an icebox overnight, so you can get the most water out, so they’ll brown well when we cook them…but just leaving them to rest while we prep other stuff should be just fine. We’re gonna start actually cooking them kinda near the end.”

Humming softly, Doppio gave Kaito a curious look. “We have ginger ale, yeah, and it is an upset stomach thing…but lime and coffee? That…sounds a little weird to eat more acid while your stomach is upset, since usually that’s what instigates sensitivity in the first place… Maybe there’s some special combination with it that ends up helping…”

“It’s the caffeine, man!” Kaito grinned, though he was watching the steaks with wide, wonder filled eyes… and definitely a hint of hunger, as he mimicked what Doppio did. He didn’t cook things he actually felt a strong desire to eat very often. Ooooh, this was gonna be a unique sorta challenge. Oooooooh, it was probably gonna smell really good… “Or, maybe it’s a ‘me’ thing. But I find kinda any hurt or sickness I have can be helped with a really strong dose of caffeine. It just makes me feel stronger, feel more capable of enduring and getting past things. Makes me wanna get excited about stuff!” 

Kaito, finishing the seasoning, pumped both of his fists into the air, jumping on his toes… before turning to Doppio. “Did it~ wanna check my work, or does it look good from where you’re at?”

“...that’s ‘cause caffeine is a drug that stops you feeling tired?” Doppio pointed out, tilting his head a little. “Like…I don’t really know the science, but there’s info stuff everywhere… It literally blocks the thing in your brain that recognizes you getting tired…so all your tired juice just builds up without you noticing, and that’s why you crash later when the drug wears off.”

Looking a little startled and surprised by Kaito’s enthusiasm, Doppio jolted slightly before looking at Kaito’s steaks…and smiling softly. “They look good. Nice work, Kaito. We’re just gonna put these to the side to rest until they’re ready to cook, okay?”

“Next we’re gonna prepare the flank steak for Chief and Chase--th-this is also kind of an extra thing, but…it’s really easy.” Shrugging, Doppio cut the slab of meat in two, putting half on Kaito’s station. “We’re just gonna chop this up really finely, so they can eat it. When we prepare the broccoli, we’re gonna mince the excess ends and add it in, we could mash up some chickpeas too, and then the beef fat when we make the steaks, and there you go! Dog food.” Giving Kaito a sheepish look, he admitted, “...there are better recipes, honestly, but…from what I’ve seen, that’s mostly if you’re regularly making your own dog food, and not as a treat, kind of thing… To be efficient with our grocery shopping, I didn’t buy any organ meat, which a lot of the recipes add in, and there are usually more types of vegetables, but…alliums, like onions and garlic, are toxic to dogs, and that’s a lot of the excess we’d have. Especially if you’re planning on making…certain stews, I think, it’d be easy to plan a meal that would incorporate a lot of things you could make into some gourmet dog food.”

Kaito huffed, rubbing the back of his neck. “Gourmet dog food… really. Well, okay, cool! Chase and Chief are, ya know, good dogs, they deserve a nice warm meal too… and not just because my husband called me cheap for wanting them to just split a steak.”

Doppio immediately fronted on Kaito, glaring at him fiercely. “Go wash your hands! Don’t touch your face while you’re cooking!”

“Gah! Okay, okay, sheesh!” Kaito pouted, heading to the sink to wash his hands again. Come on, how dirty could his neck be… “... okay, a little because Shuichi called me cheap,” Kaito admitted, shrugging a little as he shook his hands dry, grabbing a paper towel and cleaning them off. “... hey, is ‘gourmet dog food’ the sort of thing, ya know, people could eat? Without getting sick?” 

“They absolutely deserve a special meal,” Doppio pouted, slicing his half of the steak into more manageable chunks. “...hopefully Chief will like it… Arven said he was fussy about special meals…”

Sighing, wanting to meet his boyfriend’s dog’s standards, Doppio looked over at Kaito before humming softly, thinking. “Um, well…it’d depend on the food. Like I said, there are a lot of different recipes… Something like we’re making now, a person could probably eat, but it’d be a bit of a risk, especially depending on where you got your meat. Since we’re not really built to digest most raw meats, especially in large quantities. But if you cooked or cured it? Then that would be something both an animal and a human could eat fine. …it’d probably be pretty bland, since there aren’t any seasonings. I’m already pushing it with the beef fat, since that’ll have a bit of salt in it, but small amounts like that should be fine. I could just use an animal-safe oil, but…beef fat would probably taste better to them. I’ve heard even just adding an animal fat to dry kibble makes a good treat for a pet.”

Kaito hummed, nodding as he listened, mimicking Doppio again as he sliced his steak into pieces. Though, one way he saw immediately he and Doppio differed in cutting techniques was that Kaito measured out the slices with his thumb first by habit, keeping them even. It had been something Chako had drilled into him. “Here, Doppio, check this out, what I’m doing here? I think this makes it a little easier to cook everything evenly.”

Showing Doppio what he meant, Kaito idly thought about the gourmet dog food. It was fine. He had always suspected it wasn’t actually dog food he had eaten. And besides, even if it had been, no one was asking him to, like, taste test the dog food when it was done. He wasn’t bothered. He wasn’t bothered? Mmmm… nope. He wasn’t. Thinking about that was just him almost remembering with morbid curiosity. It didn’t actually matter what he had eaten. 

“Well, if Chief turns his nose at it, that’s more for Chase! I don’t think she’s ever had anything that nice, so it’ll be a real treat for her,” Kaito said fondly. She was a good dog. She stuck to Tim’s side and was gentle when sniffing Miyako. Dogs were good. Nothing wrong with dogs.

“Anyway, don’t eat any of it, okay?” Kaito said, almost absentmindedly, “The dogs themselves can let us know if it tastes alright. Don’t let me see you put any in your mouth, okay? It’ll wig me out. Alright, what next?”

“Mm?” Leaning over, Doppio looked at what Kaito was doing and… “Oh! That’s a good trick. It’s more handy than making one good piece and measuring everything to that… But, uh…” He gave Kaito a sheepish smile. “We’re trying to mince this pretty fine, since dogs can’t chew very well? And we’re not cooking this anyway… But I’m sure they’ll appreciate your care! Everything tastes a little better when the cook cares about the food,” Doppio nodded assuredly. 

It was more than more enough for Chase. Dogs could eat a lot, but…not all at one time, and they were going to have to deal with someone else throwing up if they let the puppy eat over three pounds of beef and veggies. But…if nothing else, it’d store, so the dogs could get more meals out of it. 

…but hopefully Chief did like it. 

…be…cause they were making it for the dogs?

Doppio gave Kaito a puzzled look. “...Kaito…I’m a vegetarian. I’m not gonna even eat the steaks meant for humans, let alone raw beef.”

Shaking his head, Doppio scooped their minced flank into a bowl to hang out, before he went to wash his hands, their knives, and the cutting board that wasn’t housing the resting steaks. “Next is the fish…which we don’t actually have to do any knife prep for. Since we’re steaming it, it’d be easier to take portions from it after it’s cooked, so we don’t need to do that, and it’s already been de-scaled and de-boned, ‘cause I asked the fishmonger to, so… Kaito? In a bowl, could you put in the rockcod, and squeeze the juice of half a lemon in? I’ll show you the cooking sake I put in too, we’ll need…mm. Bout two cups, I’d say.”

“Ah, right! Sorry, I forgot,” Kaito said, reaching over to pat Doppio on the head, before reaching out to touch the food– “Kidding.” Kaito grinned, giving him a wink, before going to wash his hands again. 

“And, in the name of being the responsible adult! I will handle the sake! Let me pour that real quick before I do the rockpod,” Kaito bravely announced, going to grab the bottle and the measuring cup. Though, he sniffed the bottle before saying, “Ya know, I should really check this for freshness. Just to make sure it hasn’t expired! Doppio, pass me a cup!”

Ooooh, Kaito was lucky he’d only used his cutting hand…

Giving Kaito an unamused look from the sink, Doppio huffed, “I literally bought it two days ago. And mirin isn’t really pleasant to drink straight anyway, you know. If you want to drink while cooking, wait ‘til you’re making something with wine or rum or brandy, where the cooking variety is just…cheap versions of the drinking stuff. Not different processes.”

Still, he shook water off a hand and leaned over, passing over a cup. 

“Doppio, there’s certain things you gotta let a man discover for himself.” Kaito smirked, taking the cup and, pouring in a small mouthful… and then another mouthful, just for good measure, Kaito held up the cup and said, “To our good health! No more vomiting in the shower!”

And with that declared, Kaito swigged it back.

… Kaito smacked his lips a little, humming. Blinking a bit… before his whole face seemed to suddenly pinch together, a shiver running up his spine as he put the cup under the sink, filling it with water as a truly disgusted sound burped out of him. “Ngh! Eugh… oh, that’s… not good.” Kaito grimaced, drinking some of the water, and burping again, shivering again. “Oh, it’s so much worse coming back up. Blegh. Don’t try that, Doppio.”

Doppio squinted at Kaito. Where had he heard something like that before…?

…oh well. 

Shaking his head and bringing back the newly clean supplies, Doppio rolled a lemon before cutting it in two, squeezing it over what would be the fish bowl, reminding Kaito, “Two cups of it in here. I don’t really like to drink while I’m cooking anyway… I know I wouldn’t get tipsy from a swig or two, but it feels too unprofessional. …mm, the pasta water should be about boiled when the fish is marinating, so we can put the pasta in soon, then we can get started on vegetable prep.”

As Kaito swished once more with water, he cleaned up, following Doppio’s instructions. Measuring out the sake, he went back to the bowl of rockcod and lemon juice, working slowly and carefully, giving Doppio plenty of chances to catch and correct mistakes. As he did, he chuckled a little. “You and my ‘Kichi really do have a lot in common. He also doesn’t really like drinking. My Shuichi used to… well, no, that’s not entirely right. He tolerated it more, back when Maki and I used to drink a lot. But now he tends to be on Kokichi’s side of things. Neither of them will drink unless it’s, like, some big, special occasion, and even then, barely.”

“Thinking about it, I could barely get you to drink even at the bar,” Kaito recalled, “Probably for the best, in retrospect. Just not a drinker by nature, kid?” 

Doppio raised an eyebrow. “...I thought you’d…I dunno. Grin a lot and have some big speech, being happy to hear I don’t drink much. Since I’m legally a minor, now.” 

Shaking his head as they poured the pasta into the, indeed, boiling water, turning down the heat of both pots, Doppio started setting out the vegetables for them to start prepping, starting with roughly chopping some parsley and southern basil. “I like some alcohol well enough, I guess. Some meals kinda feel like they’re incomplete without a good wine to pair them with, and it’s interesting seeing the flavors a really good bartender or mixologist can bring out in a cocktail. I just don’t feel much of a need to have it often.”

“It’s like having candy,” he shrugged. “It’s tasty and fun to experiment with, and nice for a treat, but it’s pretty bad for you if you have it frequently.”

…Doppio stared at his cutting board for a moment, starting to chew on his lip. 

“...when I…” He let out a sharp huff, brows furrowing as he realized what he’d been about to do. “No, nevermind. I’m not telling you stuff.”

“I can think up a big speech if you’d like.” Kaito chuckled, starting to wash some of the vegetables they had prepped. “Alcohol for a minor isn’t good for them, especially a lot of it. But, again, it was something I already knew about you. We were literally ready to pass you as many shots as you wanted, and you refused to touch them. That either meant you didn’t like alcohol or you didn’t abuse it even if you did like it. Either way, not something to worry about with you.”

“I did briefly consider asking you if Arven drank,” Kaito admitted, giving him a sheepish shrug, “But it occurred to me the only reason I wanted to ask is because I was drinking at his age, so I didn’t want to, like, just assume he is. Had a whole convo with him today about that, by the way, and I’m gonna try to be better about all of that.”

“And it’s good that you don’t really desire alcohol outside of, like, essentially occasionally enjoying the flavor of it! That’s a good way to engage with it! …not how I like to drink, admittedly. I drink to get drunk,” Kaito admitted, “Not at meals and stuff, then I do it the way you describe. But that doesn’t even feel like ‘drinking’ to me. When I’m going out to bars though or drinking with friends? I’m trying to get tipsy, at least. Like, that’s the goal for me.”

Kaito glanced at Doppio, at the cut off… confession? Anecdote? Before humming a bit, going back to his prep work. “You sure don’t have to~ Say, do you want to hear more of my fun childhood anecdotes instead? I’ve got a really long one about this time I got black out drunk, and when I woke up, my feet were stuck to a roof in a puddle of tar. Still no idea how it happened, but I had to pry my feet out after, like, an hour kinda digging my fingers in around the tar? And I walked back to the castle with essentially tar rubber shoes. Walked with total confidence, like they were new, weird shoes, so no one mentioned it! Totally pulled it off! Took me all damn day to peel the rest of it off my feet in the bathtub though.” Kaito laughed.

Doppio rolled his eyes a little, using the knife to scoop all of the parsley into a glass serving bowl, while he just put most of the southern basil in, putting the rest in with the fish marinade. Next, he started peeling garlic. “Right, ‘cause I was totally gonna get drunk around a bunch of strangers I’d just met. And don’t say something like, oh, but we promised to keep an eye on you! You know how many people say that? Or how many offer drinks as a treat? I was already pushing the line, staying as long as I did.”

Glancing over as Kaito admitted to the talk he had with Arven, Doppio gave him a stern, yet satisfied nod. Good. No unfair projection. 

Though, he gave a small sigh. “I hate getting drunk… I don’t like feeling not in control of myself, and not…aware, I guess. More than I am already. In the right circumstances, I know I’d probably be fine, but I just keep feeling like if I go get myself shitfaced, that’s pretty much just asking to be murdered. Or kidnapped. Or to wake up in a ditch somewhere…”

Giving Kaito a fair look, Doppio nodded. “Waking up in all kinds of circumstances. Though that’s still kinda horrifying… I’d be terrified of flaying my skin off, trying to get the tar off.”

“On contrair! …I totally did.” Kaito laughed, “But, thankfully, I was able to get some lotion from the healers and bandaged the bits of my skin that peeled off. Though, ya know what the healers told me when I came in?”

“They said,” Kaito said, leaning against the counter to look fondly over at Doppio, “That I could have gotten it all off without hurting myself with baking soda and exfoliant. Which they had plenty of! And could have even given me a nice foot bath thing to soak my feet in while I got it off. And I wouldn’t have hurt myself at all… if I had just told them I had an issue, without trying to solve it myself first.”

Kaito leaned over to nudge Doppio, smirking. “And the moral of the stoory iiiiiiis ask for help! Cause if you tear off your skin like my dumb ass did, it’ll sting! Like a bastard! For a long time! And your boyfriend will yell at you and say you’re gross. No fun.”

Doppio shuddered, thankfully having enough mental fortitude against the idea to not gag. Though he still had enough in him to give Kaito a mild pout, as he moved onto chopping up the leeks. “Fine, I get it… I’ll a…” Doppio frowned as his voice died, hands stilling on the cutting board. 

…he…did try again, but didn’t get far at all because…

…Nell wasn’t so bad. And it was…nice. Knowing there was a healer out there that would be…okay with him. 

But even with that? Doppio tried to imagine just casually going to the castle med ward if he needed help, and immediately he felt his heartbeat pick up and his joints tense. A balloon of anxiety filling his chest in an instant. 

“...I won’t try to solve medical issues on my own,” he managed. “Happy?”

“...” Kaito gave Doppio a soft look, before nodding as he returned to his work. “That’s good. Hearing that does make me happy.”

“... but it’d make me happy thinking you’d still come to me, if you needed help too. Like, say… help talking to the healers? Cause I know you don’t love to do that.”

“And, just so we’re clear,” Kaito sighed, leaning against the counters again, “I know that you know that you can’t trust me with confidential information. Not really… but. I also want you to know that you should know that if you tell me something, and I go to someone for help? It’s cause you need help. And I don’t know how else to give you the help you need. And it is help you need, Doppio…”

“Buuuuuut,” Kaito said, shrugging, “If it’s something I can help you with, even if that help is just listening, and you don’t need a third person? Theeeeen I won’t get you help. So, like… like! It’s kinda win/win. If you squint and tilt your head to the left. Confiding in me. Worst case scenario, you just get to vent. Best case scenario, I can get you someone who knows how to get the tar off your feet… metaphorically? Metaphorically.”

Doppio nodded slightly before taking a breath and continuing the prep work. Next up, some of the special jarred peppers they’d gotten first thing at the market. They weren’t especially hot, but…he’d still make two versions of the sauce to accommodate for spice-vomiters.

…it would…help, maybe. If he could count on someone to talk to healers for him. Or to drag him into the ward when his brain ran away and he couldn’t do it himself. 

Kaito wasn’t useless to him, but…

Doppio clenched his jaw. “...or it takes you four or five people to be able to actually find whatever help you think you need, and so you end up telling countless people things I told you in private.”

“Thaaaat issssss true,” Kaito said, clapping his hands together lightly. He had stopped working, now just talking to Doppio, watching him work. Doppio seemed lost in his work, and Kaito didn’t want to disrupt his train of thought or his flow. “That is true. I can’t pretend that’s not true.”

He tapped his hands together a few more times, before admitting, “I may be overcompensating with you, Doppio. Cards on the table? Asking for help here is a brand new thing for me. It wasn’t in Luminary, you know my whole ‘sidekick’ network philosophy. But here? I was terrified to ask anyone for help, for anything. Things I really needed help with. Things my family needed.”

“My paranoia and independence caused my family a lot of pain,” Kaito said, clapping his hands again. Tapping his fingers together. “A lot of really deep, really preventable pain. And it wasn’t just us. Another woman hurt us, badly, making that exact same mistake. Refusing to tell anyone what was wrong. Refusing to ask for help. Convinced she could do it on her own. And you know what happened?”

“She almost destroyed the person she was trying to help. Keeping his secrets,” Kaito said, closing his eyes. “She really did. And I hurt us too, doing it. And I was hurt, doing it… and recently, comparatively very recently, I decided to stop doing that. I decided to just tell people when I needed them, or what I needed from them, and hope it’d be okay if I did that…”

“And things have gotten better,” Kaito said, opening his eyes, looking tired, “A lot better. Night and day… annnnd then you showed up. You and Arven. And I’m going into your situations with that fresh new painful lesson all in my head. So… I’m sorry if I’m overdoing it. Overcompensating. It’s been a really tough year, and I want to do better with you.”

That was the sauce. Mix with oil. 

Doppio had accused Kaito of turning every conversation with Arven into a lecture, but it really started feeling that way with him too. Like…okay. He got it. Ask for help, don’t keep secrets. …but maybe Kaito just couldn’t explain without going into his own pain like that. 

The teen sighed, mixing up the sauce. Getting a new spoon out and putting a bit of the non-spicy version on, and handing it over to Kaito, seeing what he thought of it. “...even if I’m insisting you have mixed results…I know you do think you’re helping. That you’re intending to help. Even if I really wish you wouldn’t…but you’ve decided that’s not a choice I get to make.”

Giving Kaito a tired look, Doppio tilted his head. “...it’s over. There’s nothing left I could possibly be keeping to myself that’s going to be a danger to me. So just…stop hitting us both over the head with it, alright? …and are you actually absorbing this? I guess I could just make you dinner as a thank you, but I figured that you’d like the lesson more. How’s the sauce, we still need to add vinegar, but what do you think of the balance of everything else so far?”

Kaito sighed, nodding as he pushed off the counter. “I’m paying attention, I’m paying attention. Just didn’t wanna touch the spices. You and I both don’t want me vomiting all over the sauce, right?”

Kaito wished he could be kinder. Promise Doppio Kaito would keep his secrets from now on… but it’d just be Kaito lying. He hated not being able to be what the person in front of him wanted. What someone he liked wanted.

…buuuuuuuuut. He couldn’t be what Doppio or Arven wanted, not really. Like hot old guy said… he could either be what they wanted, or be what they needed. That was the choice.

…weeeeeeeeeh, he wanted to be BOTH! Gah! No, be strong, Kaito. Be the adult! Adults suck! That’s literally their jobs! To be the buzzkills!

Still internally pouting that he wasn’t gonna get to have his cake and eat it too, he took the spoon, popping it into his mouth as he continued to pout… before giving a surprised, pleased little hum. “Oh! That’s really good, Doppio! Mmmm~ are you seriously self-taught? That’s so impressive.”

Doppio blinked a little before puffing up with pride, almost seeming to glow a little with a smug little smile before he turned back, adding just a bit of vinegar to the two sauces. If Kaito had no complaints…well, he supposed he’d have to trust his own palette. “I am! From scratch. I didn’t know how to cook at all when Boss hired me, so it was really, ah…trial by fire.”

Using the back of the spoon for the final taste test, Doppio nodded to himself before setting the two containers aside. Leaning back to give the pasta a stir, he brought out the young broccoli, again splitting the bunch in half so Kaito could do something too. “We’re just gonna cut off the ends here, maybe an inch, inch and a half, and like I said before, we’re gonna mince those and put them with the meat for the dogs.”

“I was actually a pretty horrible cook at the start. I burnt things all the time and everything tasted horrible, but…” Doppio’s gaze lowered a little as he chopped. “...well. I had a very good incentive to get better. And it made me really happy, the first time I cooked something that Boss liked. I love seeing people get happy when they eat my food.”

“Mincing time~” Kaito keened, flipping his knife in his hands a few times before starting to cut. 

Kaito hummed, acknowledging what Doppio was saying as he cut, being an active listener. He smiled a little, even as he heard the sadness in Doppio’s tone at the end. “Well, lucky you, Arven loves good food. And so does that big dog of his. Annnnd so do I~ And, oh my god.”

Kaito laughed, shaking his head, “You haven’t seen how my smallest husband eats! Okay, I’m not gonna lie, watching Kokichi eat is an experience. He eats with his whole damn body, he, like, makes a whole performance of it. There’s a reason I learned how to cook. My husband appreciates food like it's an ephemeral experience. You’re gonna love watching him eat your food.”

“I really like cooking for Arven…” Doppio smiled softly. “That morning I made him pancakes? They were a really simple kind, not even using eggs, ‘cause I didn’t want to use up his groceries, but…he said they were amazing. He always says such nice stuff about my cooking, it can be a little overwhelming but…it’s nice. I’m happy.”

As Kaito got to work mincing the ends of the stocks, Doppio gathered up the sprigs they had prepared onto a sheet pan, drizzling them with oil and sprinkling salt overtop. Huffing a laugh, he shot Kaito an awkward smile. “I’ll, uh, look forward to it then. I…”

An odd expression went through Doppio’s face. “...an experience, I think, is a way I’d describe how Boss eats too. It’s very…memorable. Il angi--” Doppio’s eyes snapped open as his teeth clicked from how quickly he cut himself off, realizing what he’d been about to say. Loudly clearing his throat, sweating a little, Doppio quickly went over to the oven he’d set to pre-heat earlier. 

“Ee angi?” Kaito echoed, in that same way he always did when he heard a word he was unfamiliar with. “Ee angi… alright, I give. What does ee angi mean? Oh! He ate?” Kaito guessed, looking to Doppio curiously.

“I just stuttered!” Doppio choked out, face turning pink as he furiously walked back over, grabbed the sheet pan, and went over again to throw it in the oven. “Forget about it! Let’s check the pasta! Do you know what to look for when it’s ready?!”

Kaito gave Doppio another curious look, before reaching in to pick a piece of the pasta out, looking at the wall, and throwing it.

He watched it stick on the wall… before admitting, “I can’t remember if that means it’s edible or not.”

Doppio jumped, mildly flinching as Kaito moved quickly…before he gave him a bewildered look. “...you just try it. And if it’s at a doneness you like, then it’s ready. Uh…” More carefully, Doppio used the back of a clean spoon to fish out one of the grain noodles and ate it. Nodding, and lifting the pot, starting to move it over to the sink. 

“If you need the water, like I was talking about before, it’s a good trick to put a bowl or a measuring cup under your strainer, but today we can just strain it right away. And immediately rinse with cold water to stop it from cooking more!”

“I feel like you’re missing out on the joy of throwing pasta at a wall and seeing if it sticks, Doppio~” Kaito tsked, shaking his head, “Honestly, the youth these days. You’re all so serious about stuff. Loosen up~”

Kaito, taking one of the pasta bits, smirked a little, before saying, “Think if I stuck this on the ceiling, I could catch it on the way down?”

And with that, he threw it up, watching it carefully… before cheering when it hit and stuck to the ceiling, “Boom! There it goes! Now to catch it when it falls off! …aaaany second now…”

…

“Aaaaaany second,” Kaito said, peering at the pasta. “Any second.”

“It must seem so when you’ve got the maturity of a toddler,” Doppio said dryly, handling the pasta. He thought he had plenty of fun, but arbitrarily throwing food at walls just…seemed like a waste of food and more work cleaning later. 

…which would be even more difficult later if--

“Kaito! If it stuck to the wall then--” Doppio sighed, defeated, looking up at the orzo grain on the ceiling. “...then it’s gonna stick. …I guess this means I should ask around for a ladder, later…”

Pouring the pasta into the glass bowl, Doppio returned to the vegetables, bringing out the container of small tomatoes to start slicing up. “...so that talk with Arven went well? I hope you actually apologized to him.”

“Hah. You say that like I’m not gonna just put you on my shoulders later and have you reach up to snatch it,” Kaito said, realizing that, yeah, that pasta was hanging on there. “It’s like you don’t know me at all.”

He went back to work, watching what Doppio was doing before taking some of the tomato slices and starting to slice them up more. “...shoot, did I?” Kaito murmured, brow furrowing. “Yes? I want to say yes. I did that thing where I said, like, literally everything that came to mind trying to, like… fiiiiiix it? Apologizing is usually one of those thoughts. I’m sure I must have. I’m a big believer in the power of a damn good apology.”

“But! It did feel like we ended on a positive note, either way. He had that ‘I don’t want to smile but I’m kinda smiling’ look he gets on his face sometimes! And, like, he ended it with a good, friendly, ‘I totally forgive you and like you we are cool now’ prank! Where heeeeeee locked me in a storage closet and left me without telling anyone where I was. Didn’t even do it with any final, like, snarky remark! Just did it and left, didn’t look back… Arven really is a pretty cool guy, not gonna lie. Like, I get it. I can see why you’re smitten. Bad boys are teenage catnip.”

Doppio sent a skeptical look at the ceiling. …could he reach from Kaito’s shoulders? …did he want to be picked up like that? …but could he trust anyone else to actually clean it…

Nodding, Doppio let out a little breath. It sounded like they’d resolved things, then. Not fully, because Kaito actually had to uphold his promise of changed behavior but…an apology was a good start! And knowing what he had to change, and deciding to was too!

And…Arven sorta smiling and pulling a prank was…probably good. Definitely good. Very Arven stuff. And Kaito had obviously gotten out of the storage closet, so everything was okay! It was all good and--

Doppio scowled at Kaito. “He’s not bad! Kaito, this was the whole conversation that…that all that was about! Arven’s a great person!”

Kaito shot Doppio a startled look, before laughing, putting his hands up in surrender. “No, no, not an actual, like, ‘bad’ boy. Not a bad guy! Like, ya know… the ‘type’! The style. That sorta fiercely independent, screw the system, ‘I live by my own rules, just me and my dog out on the road’ kinda edginess! It’s like, a… ya know. A simplified summary of things someone might find attractive in a person.”

“Like, me, right?” Kaito said, gesturing to himself, “I’ve gone through phases. Bad boy, posh, jock, uuuuuh, kinda a fuckboi, not gonna lie, mm… I think these days I’m a…” Kaito’s brow pinched. “...well, my husband told me what a ‘dilf’ was. You ever heard of that? If not, don’t ask what it means. And don’t assume the ‘d’ is for dildo. That’s where I went wrong. Come on, you know generally what I’m talking about, right? Types of simple bundles of attractive traits! Sometimes insulting, but usually just used for fun… Am I making any sense?”

Still giving Kaito a testy look, Doppio did hear him out, but… A growing confusion was all there was on the teen’s face. “...no. What’s a ‘dilf’? What’s a ‘dildo’? What… You know, nevermind, it’s all gonna be Kaito Nonsense.”

Shaking his head, Doppio scooped all the tomatoes into the glass bowl, looking around before putting the shallots he’d chopped before in as well, before getting out the chickpeas. Inspecting them to make sure they were all good…before he turned pink. 

“...Arven said my ears were cute. Is that an attractive trait thing?”

“Awwwwwwww! Oh no, that’s so cute!” Kaito gushed, looking absolutely electric as he keened at Doppio. He hurried around the counter so that he was looking more fully at Doppio, placing his elbows on the counter and plopping his chin into his hands, grinning excitedly at him with wide, sparkly eyes as he said, “Did he really? That’s such a cute thing to point out. Oh, my heart.”

“And, kinda. Not exactly what I was talking about, but you’re right, what I was talking about was Kaito Nonsense anyway.” Kaito chuckled. “That’s just a very sweet thing to notice about a guy you like. Honestly, that’s a fantastic green flag… unless he gets weird about it?” Kaito admitted, tilting his head, “Like, if it becomes ‘he likes ears’ rather than ‘he likes your ears’, then it’s less cute. Not necessarily bad, but less cute. But if that was the case, I honestly doubt he’d have mentioned it. Nah, I think it’s just Arven being sweet. If anything, him saying something like that would be an ‘attractive trait’ like how I was talking about. Kinda like ‘personality trait’ things.”

“For instance, you can do math in your head, which is very impressive! Maybe Arven thinks so too? He looked impressed when you did it for his science lab,” Kaito pointed out, smirking.

Doppio looked a little startled, having not expected to get that kind of reaction, and he gave Kaito an uneasy look as he separated out a little more than a handful of chickpeas and started squishing them with the side of a knife. “It wasn’t weird. He just…um. Said he kinda noticed one day, then kept noticing stuff. It, uh…” Doppio flushed a little more. “I thought it was cute…even if it’s a little embarrassing. I always wear my hair up so…they’re kinda always out. …never noticed I had a big freckle on one either…”

Turning more red, Doppio shook his head a little before hesitating, looking a little insecure. “I-I’m pretty sure I’ve heard people talk about ‘mental math’ before, I don’t think that’s… Was he?”

“Oh, absolutely. Even people who aren’t, like, really impressed by intelligence are still impressed by mental math like that. Looks like magic to anyone who doesn’t know how  to do it,” Kaito said, one hundred percent confident in this. “It’s so useful too! I saw his eyebrows shoot up when he realized what you were doing, and then he looked almost smug. Like, hah, look at the cool thing my boyfriend can do… it was very sweet. It made me happy to see it.”

“Now, you should never really feel like you have to be great at things to keep your partner's attention. But! It’s good if they can recognize and appreciate the things you’re good at, and they tell you so,” Kaito said. “I feel like you already know that, cause you pay Arven a lot of compliments, and it sounds like he pays them right back, but that should really be something you should expect out of someone you’re dating. I mean, that’s just my opinion, that’s not a fact, but I do know that I’ve dated a lot of people in my time, and the times I felt best in life were the times when I was dating someone who wasn’t afraid to tell me nice things they had noticed about me. ‘Kichi’s great about that! My husband’s a little flatterer~ Shuichi too, really, though he sometimes for fun will make me work a little harder for it. But if he sees I’m having a bad day and need a pick me up? He’ll tell me all sorts of nice things he’s noticed about me, and I always end up feeling more ready to take on the universe!”

“It’s a good trait to both be and have in a partner. It’s good for you guys mentally,” Kaito said. “...do you need help squishing those?”

He made Arven feel smug?

While Doppio was practically glowing red, he focused in on his work with a small smile, feeling warm and…happy. He had never really thought about it but…yeah. He wanted to be someone Arven could feel smug about. Someone he was proud of, in terms of being his boyfriend. Arven was so brilliant and so…living up to that brilliance to the point he could make his boyfriend smile like that…

Oo. Doppio really liked the idea of that. 

“It’s a little surprising still when he calls me cute ‘n…other stuff.” Not a mess. Not pathetic. Laughable, really, that anyone would consider him pathetic, which had really just blown Doppio away. “...but it’s nice. It makes me happy to be around someone who thinks I’m cool, especially when they’re the coolest person I know. Arven just…always makes me happy to be around him. No matter what.”

Looking at the rest of the chickpeas, Doppio hummed before shaking his head. “I don’t think so, it’s not much. But if you could put the rest of them in the salad bowl? And crumble in that cheese we got, that would be perfect.”

“On it, captain!” Kaito said, hurrying to go get the bowl. Grabbing the cheese on the way back. 

As he started pouring the rest in, then started working on crumbling the cheese, Kaito recalled the things Doppio had said in a panic on the roof. Apologizing and promising to work harder… “Well, I think Arven’s a lucky guy, even if you think he’s cool. You have a lot going for you, Doppio. You’re smart, you’re hard working, you are, just, incredibly pretty, you can stand up for yourself, which is actually a really tough trait to find! Someone who can stand strong in a conflict! Without, like, being really dumb about it? That’s an admirable trait!”

“Seriously, you’d be an absolute catch for anyone, literally anybody would be lucky to get a shot with you, let alone hang out or spend time with you. And it’s not being mean to Arven to say that I hope he knows what a treasure he’s stumbled onto. It’d be true for literally anyone. You’re the kind of guy people dream about, and Arven is a lucky guy.”

At first, Doppio had just been a little embarrassed. Sometimes Kaito got like this, just…complimenting him, and it was a little uncomfortable and a little flattering, and Doppio just had to stew with those feelings. But then Kaito just…kept going. And Doppio could only give him a…more intense version of the look he’d already been sporting, until….

…the kind of guy people dreamed about. 

…ha. What a lucky guess. 

It was clearly visible, the way Doppio’s face fell, as he scooped the smashed chickpeas into the dog food bowl. Eyes losing focus with a deep sadness. 

But with a breath he just…carried on, getting out a second serving bowl, since he realized they needed to split the pasta salad. Looking down, Doppio shrugged with a small, fake smile. “Thanks. It feels weird to say myself, but…I’m happy with Arven, and I’m happy I make him happy too.”

He knew he hadn’t been made to be a good…romantic partner or anything. That was just luck that he…ended up being those things, he guessed. 

…almost done cooking. 

“...I just need to toss the salads together with the two chimichurris. Where that griddle top is on the stove, could you turn the burner onto medium? And we’ll start steaming the fish on those leeks in the basket.”

Shoot. Kaito had lost him somewhere.

Trying not to feel too disappointed, Kaito did as he was told, going to take care of the burner, thinking over what he had said. Where had he lost Doppio? Maybe it was just too many compliments at once? Certainly none of them were the wrong kind of compliment, Kaito didn’t think you could go wrong so long as they were true. But something had made Doppio sad. 

Kaito just wanted to keep working on the bricks of Doppio’s self esteem. Keep adding more and more to the wall, that the next time Doppio felt like he had to beg his boss, promising he’ll be more useful, that he might remember that he was more than good enough, and his boss was an idiot to have lost someone like him. To have messed up so badly that he had lost probably the most valuable asset he had had. Doppio was valuable, and Kaito wanted to make sure Doppio knew it.

But, well, self esteem and confidence didn’t tend to be quick fix things anyway. Kaito wished a week of compliments was enough to boost self esteem, but in reality that sort of positive reinforcement took at least months. Especially for someone who had grown up without it. He’d just have to be consistent… well, as consistent as he could be. Especially when…

“Hey, Doppio,” Kaito said, burner on, waiting for new instructions, “...so. You should know. I’m not legally allowed to adopt you. So… if that’s been something you’ve been worried about? Or wondering about? I can’t. So…” Kaito grinned a little thinly, “That’s one thing you don’t have to worry about! I am not, in fact, an indefinite issue for you! You will be free of me someday!”

“But, uh…” Kaito paused, staring at the ceiling. The pasta was still there. “...do you have any questions, or strong feelings, about where you might want to settle in the future? Because while I can’t adopt you, I can be an advocate for you, making sure you’re happy wherever you end up after this. The more specific, the more I can advocate! Like… with the… ya know. One exception,” Kaito said uncomfortably, “...of going back. But anything else? I can help.”

“And that’s not something you have to know how to answer right now. I’m mostly just saying it now so that you have time to think about it. And you might have plenty of time still! I’m not exactly going to let anyone kick you out of your room before you are ready, and I am down for being a temporary guardian for as long as you need me… but I’m not allowed to be a permanent solution. So. Yeah. I just want you to know that.”

Mixing up the two salads (they were visually distinct enough that Doppio wasn’t worried about having to label them), Doppio blinked, before giving Kaito a surprised look. He hadn’t thought it was a sure thing, but…like he’d told Arven--he had been expecting Kaito to…throw a fit. Make a fuss. Try to adopt him. 

…maybe he had, and Doppio was only hearing about the outcome. But…

Doppio huffed, puffing air into his bangs. “Don’t be such a liar, Kaito. I’m not gonna be free of you, even if you’re not my legal guardian. You’ll find some way to…to, like, pop up during my d-dates with Arven and yell ‘shenanigans’ at us. I think it’s just a law of the universe now.”

…that was a constant. But everything else?

…they were going to try to adopt him out to someone, huh. Once the investigation with Boss was over. …what if he really didn’t age? That would be…kind of weird. For some rando adopter to find out. 

…he should ask Mariah, or Maki, or Nell about it. Surely there was some sort of answer…

Grabbing some paper towels to start patting the steaks dry, Doppio shrugged a little. “...I don’t wanna be sent anywhere where Arven isn’t. So…I guess not leaving Usott. I know I haven’t lived here super long, but…I don’t wanna end up across the country for…whatever bullshit reasons.”

Kaito chuckled a little. “You caught me. Yeah, not being allowed to adopt you isn’t gonna stop me from caring about you. That you are stuck with.”

But Kaito knew he couldn’t put Kokichi and Shuichi through the stress of Kaito begging them to let him adopt a teenager. Two teenagers. He knew he was already stressing them out enough with all of this. He remembered the battle just getting to stay involved in Addason’s life had been. And he hadn’t even been trying to adopt Addason himself then… He couldn’t put his family through that. He had to accept that there were certain boundaries in his life that he had to respect. 

But this time it would be easier than when he had been trying to interfere with Addason’s adoption! Because Doppio and Arven both did have voices, and desires, and goals, and it wasn’t just Kaito guessing what might be the best thing for them. He could be a genuine help to them, making sure their desires were heard and respected. No one could accuse him of overstepping this time! It’d be cruel to force the teens to argue on their own behalf! 

So he nodded, looking determined. “I sort of thought that’d be one of the criteria. You should know, Arven and I are gonna have a similar conversation, though from what I understand, Arven’s case is already a little different. We still have to ask him what he wants, but the fact that he’s been paying the mortgage on a house for a few years now makes it a little tougher to justify pulling him from his home, especially considering there’s no one dangerous there to protect him from. It’s sort of sounding like Arven’s guardianship isn’t going to be a live-in person, but more like someone who’s officially in charge of checking in and making sure he’s alright and has everything he needs. Which, along with whoever's going to be assigned that, I am also going to be doing, no matter what. But none of that is official, yet, it's still just speculation, and Arven still needs to make his own choices about that.”

“But, I think it’s safe to say you’re both going to want to stay in the area. So, great!” Kaito grinned, it half a smirk. “I am more than happy to advocate that. I also would be sad if you went far away. I can only shout shenanigans so loudly. But, what I do want you, and Arven, to think about is the kind of people or even community you would feel more or less comfortable involved with. If you guys are anything like my last adoptee, there’s gonna be a lot of interviews, but if there’s a type of person you wouldn’t feel comfortable even interviewing? Like, if someone, hypothetically, says they’d raise you in an Atuan household with Atuan virtues, that sort of thing? I can make it so that won’t end up being someone you’d interview at all. Don’t wanna live with a bunch of other kids? Got it. Don’t wanna be the only kid? Still got you! Okay? Things like that, I want to make sure we can do our best to accommodate you. Fucking hate birds and the household has like ten birds? I agree! Don’t even interview those people! Those people are crazy people! Who gets a bird, let alone ten!?”

Doppio nodded with a small frown. “Arven said that was one of the big reasons he never bothered applying for independence, ‘cause he didn’t wanna lose his house. Which I think is dumb… It’s his! The government shouldn’t be able to just take it if he hasn’t done anything wrong. If anything, if he was assigned a guardian, they should have to move in with him. …or do check-ins, like you’re saying.”

Bringing over the steaks, Doppio hovered his palm above the griddle before nodding, drizzling some oil on top, and waiting to see movement from it. 

…anything else he’d want considered?

“...what’s your issue with birds, they’re great,” Doppio shot Kaito a disparaging look before he sighed, shrugging. “...I dunno. I’ll think about it. I mean…” He wilted a bit. “...you know what my only daydream of a parent looked like. And I never thought about anything else.”

“Birds are jerks,” Kaito said simply, no room for argument. “And they are dirty. And, if we can find a guardian who’d move in and be good for Arven? That’d be ideal, I’d feel way better knowing he wasn’t in that house totally alone. But, finding one that visits him every day is likely more realistic… Though, I’m up for dreaming big for our Arven’s sake. He deserves people dreaming big for him.”

Kaito knew Doppio would be annoyed by this, but he reached out to put a hand on his shoulder. “I know… and that’s okay. I’m sorry I can’t offer you what you really want. I know whatever I can find for you is gonna be second best to the real things, at least for you, but… I promise what we do find is going to be good. It’s just going to be the kind of family situation that you haven’t had a chance to imagine yet. But your happiness is a priority to me, Doppio. I will never leave you somewhere you hate. Okay? You will never have to settle. I promise.”

“...I want him to be happy,” Doppio said quietly. “I do believe him, that he could do everything by himself and be okay…but he sounds sad, sometimes. When he talks about stuff that’s kinda…about being alone. I think… Even if he doesn’t need them, he deserves someone that’ll think of him as their priority, in a parent sort of way.”

Seeing the oil start to shimmer, Doppio took up a steak with a set of tongs, explaining, “Okay, we’re gonna put these on. Just kinda…generally? Whenever you’re gonna put something in hot oil, you wanna lay it away from yourself, so the oil doesn’t spit back at you…see?” After setting the first steak on the griddle, he passed the tongs to Kaito, letting him get the rest. 

And he just…stayed in that moment, with the hand on his shoulder. With the reassurances. “...thanks, Kaito.”

“...do you think I could…ever see him again?”

“I’ll make sure he gets it. Arven deserves a guardian who loves him. That guardian’s gonna have to compete with me over who loves him more–” Kaito started to say, before hearing himself, coughing as he corrected, “I mean, sorry, misspoke, who’s… more concerned about him. That’s what I meant to say. That’s a way more reasonable thing for me to say. Ahem. Cough. But, yeah, I’ll find them. Or I’ll make sure someone does, at the very least. You guys deserve to be someone’s top priority.”

As Kaito started to carefully put the steak on, careful of the oil as Doppio had instructed– oooh, it already smelled really good– he considered the question. Trying to think of the most honest but at the same time most… well, still honest answer…

“I don’t think anyone could stop you, if you decided to,” Kaito said. “I’d hope you’d do it in a way where you’d let us help you. Make sure you were safe doing it. Let yourself rely on us… but I know we couldn’t stop you. If you really meant to.”

“...I wasn’t lying, the first time I told you this,” Kaito said softly, “But maybe, if you give it time? Give Dicea time? Maybe they could help him become the kind of person you should see again. Someone who… would apologize to you. Tell you it wasn’t your fault. Be honest with you. Because if Dicea helps him out of whatever mental pit he’s in that has him acting this way, he’d see you deserved those things. And… I’d want you to have them. If there was ever a possibility.”

“But I hope you won’t go to apologize to him for all of this happening,” Kaito said softly. “You haven’t done anything wrong.”

Doppio raised a skeptical eyebrow at Kaito, before watching carefully as he laid his first steak down. Humming with approval, Doppio left him to it, as he fetched the steamer pot with the leeks and fish and put it on the boiling lower pot, lidding it. 

And…really? After that? Well, Doppio would want to rub the steaks down with a little bit of butter, once they had started to sear, along with cracking some pepper over, and of course he would put pepper and squeeze a lemon over the broccoli when it came out of the oven, but…mostly? It was just time to wait. 

…

Starting to collect things to clean, Doppio paused, closing his eyes with a guilty grimace. “...I keep thinking about just…walking out of the castle and going home. As soon as Arven and I left town, I kept thinking about just…sneaking in in the morning, and trying to go back to how things were, but just never be seen… I know where my own house is. I could just go…”

He shook his head a little. Boss didn’t need help, not the kind Kaito was talking about. Boss was already perfect. Doppio just… He just wished…

…that Boss loved him too. 

“...I want to apologize,” Doppio said sadly. “I just left home one day and never came back, and now all of a sudden government agents are at the door… I never wanted to put him in a position like that.”

“...I miss him,” Doppio reminded Kaito. “...I want to go home…”

“I know you do…” Kaito said, guilt rushing through him. He wished Doppio could. He remembered so many times wanting the same thing. To go home. Even if just for a little bit. Just long enough to maybe fight all the voices in his head, telling him how garbage his home was. Just wanting to see it again for himself… to see it looking right again, rather than the ugly thing it had started to become in his mind. 

He still kind of wanted that.

“...if you decide to do it? Please let me take you.” Kaito said, “Don’t go alone. Don’t go planning to stay. This man has hurt you, Doppio. I don’t want him laying another hand on you. Take me, or take Lake, one of us, just to make sure that if you go, you can safely leave again. Okay?”

Doppio sighed and turned on the water, starting to soap down everything he had to clean. And, sadly, but with understanding, he nodded. “Okay.”

“...after we take the steaks off, we should let Arven and your family know that it’s time to come over. That’ll give the meat enough time to rest before we cut it and let people serve up. …do you think you get the recipe? I think I kinda forgot to explain some stuff.”

“Honestly, Doppio?” Kaito grinned, feeling a little relieved he hadn’t fought him on that. Kaito wasn’t sure if he was going to actually do it, but he was grateful Doppio hadn’t given him a hard time. “I almost never learn the recipe after being shown it once. The woman who’s been teaching me always ends up having to show me twice before I get it. If I do this myself, I’ll make mistakes.”

“But!” Kaito said, looking around excitedly at the food, “I know more now than I did an hour ago! I could definitely do a lot of this on my own! Again, not without mistakes, but definitely a solid attempt! And this was great! Everything smells good, it looks good, I bet it’s gonna taste amazing, and it was a lot of fun to do this with you!”

Reaching over, ignoring the soap and water, Kaito quickly hugged Doppio, before backing off before Doppio could yell at him to wash up. “Thank you for teaching me! This was great, I loved it! I feel fully paid back!”

Doppio blinked. “Oh… W-well, I mean, I wouldn’t expect you to…like, perfectly be able to recreate it, but…i-it’s the concepts, you know? Being able to cook things in a basic way, then experimenting with iterations and flavors and…all…um.”

Well, Kaito didn’t seem like it’d all gone in one ear and out the other, and he seemed happ--”Eep!”

Doppio tensed in the sudden hug, tossing a bit of water up before he looked back at Kaito with a startled, pink face. “Y-you’re welcome?! …but you’re still planning on reading the rest of the story to me, right?”

Kaito gave Doppio a mildly surprised look… before he grinned wide. Looking incredibly pleased, borderline misty-eyed as he said, “Still up for that? Cause yes, I really, really want to. Just wherever you’re ready to sit down and listen, okay? It’s something I’m really looking forward to.”

Doppio looked a little alarmed by the potential tears in Kaito’s eyes. “Y-you said you were gonna do it anyway! Um, even if I was sleeping? I think you said something about it getting into my dreams… Just…”

He huffed, looking a little embarrassed. “...I wanna know what happens. If Link ‘n Sheik ‘n Navi manage to awaken all the sages and beat Ganondorf…an’ all. A-and if Link can…get more control over the time stuff…”

Kaito laughed, throwing an arm over Doppio’s shoulders and shaking him a little. “And you will find out! It’ll be fun, you and Arven can grab snacks and settle in and I’ll regale you with the tale! You can get him up to speed about what’s happened so far, he’ll be able to keep up! Aw, ya know what, I’m gonna try this on Tim and the girls too. Maybe I’ve got a knack for story time! Who knows, between you and Kokichi, you guys are the first ones I’ve tried this on.”

“It makes me happy, though.” Kaito laughed, letting Doppio go and rubbing at his goatee a little, still looking a little misty eyed. “It’s nice getting to share something like this. I don’t know. It means a lot to me… Anyway! Yeah, we’ll do that soon!”

Looking around the kitchen again, Kaito asked, “Should I warn everyone dinner’s soon? Go make a run around, be back in time to help plate and bring everything up? Or I suppose it might be smarter to just eat here, that’s what we did last time. Should I go fetch?”

…that actually sounded kind of nice. He didn’t know if Arven would be interested but, well, Kaito was a good storyteller, and…it’d be fun, hearing the rest of the story with Arven. …Doppio just hoped Amaina wouldn’t decide to give them costumes during it. …or that Arven wouldn’t be upset being Sheik. 

Though, Doppio gave Kaito a surprised look. “You’ve only read to me and your husband? Considering you have younger kids, I would’ve thought… Or do you not count Miyako, because she can’t understand what you’re saying?” …whatever the number, he really would’ve thought Kaito would’ve read to his son. They seemed close, from what Doppio had seen. 

“Um, I was thinking we could eat here…” Doppio smiled grimly. “I don’t really trust getting all this somewhere else without incident. So, uh…yeah, please let everyone know that food’s about up. I’ll start setting a table up, and get the dog bowls ready for Chief and Chase.”

…and a moment alone would let him plate something for Amaina too.

“Oh, Doppio, you have no idea,” Kaito said, a tad dryly. “You’re getting the version of me that’s had a little over half a year learning how to act like this. My poor Timothy got the dumbass ‘still basically a kid himself’ prototype from a year ago that I doubt you could even imagine me being. It took me so long to get my shit together, so things go a little slower between me and Tim, cause I’m still fixing my old mistakes. Even just convincing the kid I actually love him has been a long process that I’ve fumbled on so much. Convincing him to let me dote on him as the kid he is has been its own process. But we’re getting there! He usually has an easier time relaxing into it if I include his friends too. It’ll be good, he’ll like it! I’ll invite the girls to a sleepover and he won’t even question it.”

“But! That’s all neither here nor there,” Kaito said, reaching his arms above his head and stretching until little popping sounds notably cracked between his shoulders. “Phew. Busy day. Alright, I’ll be quick! Go start herding all the cats! Be right back~” Kaito said, patting Doppio on the back, before hurrying off. Still wearing the apron. 

Doppio gave Kaito a surprised look. He supposed that was true, people tended to only see the finished result, rather than the work behind it…but Kaito and Timothy had such a…he didn’t know. They just…looked like family. And it seemed like an impossibility to Doppio that anyone would be able to withstand Kaito’s love or doting. 

…also, like, what? Geez, you’d think Kaito would’ve been able to pull himself together to be more of an adult by 35. 

Sighing, Doppio sent Kaito off with a small wave before he went back to finishing the dishes. These ones he could just let drip dry on a rack, since they wouldn’t be going anywhere, but the serving dishes and plates ‘n stuff he should probably towel dry later… Following his plan, it wasn’t long before Doppio wiped down a long free counter and pulled over extra stools, poured glasses of water for everyone (they could get other drinks too, he supposed, but it was good to have water regardless), set out utensils, prepared the dog bowls, and started plating up, murmuring to himself over and over everyone’s preferences. Steak and non-spice for Maki and Kaito, fish and spice for Shuuichi and Kokichi, steak and spice for Arven and Timothy…

And…somehow? Doppio had managed to set everything out before anyone had returned, and…

…man…he was…tired…

Sitting at the cooking counter he and Kaito had been at, Doppio laid his head on crossed arms, slumping over it like a creepy Harvest prop.

Amaina yawned. 

She sat up from where she was nestled into Doppio’s hair, blinking tiredly as she looked around. Smacking her lips a little before yawning again, her yawn a little, musical squeak, before flopping back onto the base of Doppio’s braid. 

-_- maaaaaaan what a day huh???

Doppio jolted, lifting his head with a small gasp as he was suddenly awoken from sleep. He glanced around for a moment before what had happened filtered through his brain and he sighed. 

“Ciao, Angelo…yeah. Yeah…you could say that again.”

Sighing, he rubbed his eyes before double-checking the room once more. When no members of the royal family popped out of nowhere, he got up and moved a saucer out from under the fish pot lid, revealing a miniature spread of all he’d made. One slice of the steak cut into smaller slices, the spicier sauce spooned over, a slice of fish separated by its natural fibers and laid across a single bias-cut leek, a tablespoon of the pasta salad quenelled as much as something loose could be, and one stalk of the broccoli, sliced into roughly quarter inch pieces. 

Smiling softly, Doppio brought it out more properly onto the counter, admitting, “I couldn’t find cutlery your size, sorry. Think you could do me a favor for that part?”

-_-

OvO? Plate for me???

Amaina jumped off of Doppio’s head, landing with a floating grace next to her plate, looking over it with obvious excitement. When she looked up at Doppio, she was wearing a large bib that covered half her body with a small cat drawn onto it, not unlike Doppio’s apron, and was holding a fork and knife that, while small enough for her to grab, still looked comically oversized in her hands. 

OoO I’m invited to the paaaarty!?

Doppio laughed softly at Amaina’s zeal, giving her a fond look as he nodded…before it faded into a bit of guilt. “I’d want you there, of course. This turned into a…friends and family dinner, I guess, and you’re a friend. I’m not sure how…I’d explain a miniature portion set out, though. My brain’s already broken enough, I don’t need Kaito’s family thinking I’m just straight up crazy too.”

“...but I hope you enjoy it,” he said softly. “You’ll get to see how it tastes to everyone, right? That’s a lot of different experiences to have.”

O.O

OoO I will be super secret spy guest it’s only fair on baby boy

And with that, she spun around, little magical sparkles shooting out of her hands and the edge of her dress, a high swell of orchestra music emphasizing that Magic was Happening… and when she stopped and the sparkles went away, she stared blankly at Doppio. Nothing different.

O.O

OoO oh yeah the plate won’t be seen by anyone who can’t see me you’re WELCOME

“Wow, it smells amazing in here,” Arven said as he walked in, Chief padding over to Doppio immediately, placing his paw on Doppio’s foot as he stared expectantly up at him. Treats. He could smell them. Treats. “And this is a lot of food! I wish I hadn’t overslept, it looks like this was a lot of work!”

Doppio’s eyes widened as the…color and music show swelled around Amaina…but he had to, after a moment, just look around in confusion. It had been cool! And in line with Amaina’s dramatics! But, uh…

“Oh!” Doppio blinked. “Oh, that…that’s amazing.” It was one thing to be on another plane of existence and pick and choose who could see her, or anything she made. It was another to take something from their plane and…mess with it. “Amaina, that’s incredible.”

With a grin, he gently picked up the saucer. “Well, then let’s get you a proper seat at the party table, right?”

Setting her plate down between his and Arven’s places, Doppio jumped a little as, on cue, his boyfriend entered, and Doppio couldn’t help but smile bashfully, crouching a little to scratch Chief’s ears. “It wasn’t too bad, Kaito was very hands-on while I was showing him. O-of course I would’ve been happy for you to join us, but…I’m happy you got a nap in, if you were tired.”

“I, uh, made dog food with flank steak, broccoli stalks, chickpeas, and beef fat… Would that be alright for Chief to have?” Doppio nodded at the two dog bowls, up on the cooking counter since he didn’t want the dogs immediately diving into food as soon as they got in the room. “I…um, I’m thinking now I probably should’ve asked you more about Chief’s diet…”

Chief tapped Doppio’s feet some more. Treats. Treats please. On the double. Please.

“Chief, don’t beg you old man,” Arven chastised, patting Chief on the head, the dog refusing to look away from Doppio for a second. “And honestly, he’ll eat most anything. He only starts to get picky if I try to feed him the same thing over and over again. He likes the variety of life, and he knows I’ll buckle if he goes on a hunger strike…”

Arven paused, looking down at Doppio’s outfit. A pink cat silhouette eyeing him cheerfully back. “...cute,” Arven whispered, like he was talking to himself. 

Amaina was suddenly on Arven’s shoulder, a smug little look on her face as she whispered, he’d look especially cute wearing only that, huh?

“Amaina! Honestly!” Arven balked, face bright red, swiping at her as she flew off, giggling through the air. 

Chuckling softly, Doppio shuffled back, getting his feet freed from Chief’s treat prison to go fetch his bowl. He figured all their human guests could wait to eat together, but there was no sense in expecting guest decorum from a dog. “I feel like you’ve told me something like that before… Still, I hope he likes it. I’ve read more about making dog food than I would’ve expected, but this is still my first time making it.”

Crouching down to brace himself from rampaging, hungry dog, Doppio set the bowl down…though he should’ve been braced for something else, as his eyes snapped open, looking over at Amaina with a pale, stricken expression. 

“Wh-what?!” he squeaked, pallor going straight into tomato town in a matter of seconds. “Th-this is… Kaito g-got this just generally, f-for his husbands, I’m just…”

“O-oh, just ignore her! She’s just trying to get a reaction out of us.” Arven huffed, shooting the flying, giggling Amaina a frustrated look. “This is why I never encouraged her before! H-honestly!”

Though, there was something slightly disappointed in Arven’s eyes, as he asked, “Oh, so you don’t get to keep that? Shame, it, uh… suits you.” He coughed. Looking away.

Chief, tail wagging, did indeed go thundering towards the bowl…  but he looked up curiously, sniffing the air, hearing something they couldn’t… and then, barking, in came running Chase. The smaller black lab slipping on the wood flooring as she ran in, before catching herself, hurrying over to the bowl as she yipped excitedly. 

Chief, brave, kind, older gentleman that he was, licked his jaw and pouted only a little as he stepped back. Flopping himself down on his butt with a thump as he watched Chase immediately come up to the bowl, sniffing the bowl excitedly before starting to lick the food. Chief looking up sadly at his humans as Chase started to eat. Treats? …more treats?

“Chase! Chase! Where did you go!?” Timothy shouted with a huff, running in about thirty seconds behind her, looking around with a baffled look on his face. “Chase? Did my dog run into here?” he asked the two teens, “She just ran off! She doesn’t usually do that.”

She absolutely was, but…well, half the time Amaina was right, for all that she didn’t need to say it, and absolutely not in the way she had. So there was a, uh…real possibility that Arven really would like to see him in…n-nothing but an apron… Doppio’s face blared crimson. 

Though it did take on something disappointed as Chief seemed to hesitate, not going in to eat like Doppio had always seen him before. …did he really make something Chief wouldn’t--

“O-oh!” Doppio stuttered in surprise, looking at the black whirlwind skitter in and skid her way to the bowl and…ha, well, at least Chase seemed to like it. Laughing softly, Doppio got up and retrieved the second bowl, giving Chief a fond pat for his patience before Doppio set it down, giving the dogs some personal space between them. He had been hoping to avoid them fighting over food, and, well, at least Chief wouldn’t. 

“She’s right here, Timothy,” Doppio called out, giving the younger boy a small wave. “Sorry about that, I guess she must’ve smelled the food. Um…your dad and I made dog food, so…yeah. Sorry for the worry.”

“Chase, you little weirdo.” Timothy pouted, going around the counter to check on her, though his expression softened as he saw her happily eating next to the much bigger dog, who was just as happily chowing down on his own food now. “What do I, starve you? You ate a few hours ago. Little drama queen.”

“She takes after her uncles. All of them. Drama queens, the bunch,” Maki said, as she walked in with Shuichi, who looked around thoughtfully. “There’s a lot of scent in the air. Did you actually make an entire meal? Did you miss the buffet they lay out on the first floor, every day, three times a day?”

“Don’t tease, Maki, this is nice. When’s the last time we had a personalized meal?” Shuichi smiled, walking up to the plates and looking it over. “It smells amazing. Which one’s mine?”

“The steak looks good. I’m claiming one of the steaks,” Maki said, before narrowing her eyes. “Wait, did you really make individual plates for us all? It’d be so odd to have such a strange diversity to the plates otherwise. That’s… more considerate than I was expecting. I assumed when you all were asking what we wanted, you were taking suggestions, not requests.”

Fussing a bit with the apron straps, Doppio sheepishly nodded before shrugging a bit. “I mean, it was sort of suggestions, but…also mostly requests…um. I-I’m pretty used to shopping for leftovers, though, so there’s still stuff left of everything, if you wanted something different, but, uh, I tried to lay the plates out for what I-I, uh, thought you’d most want.”

Gesturing to the table, Doppio explained the placement. “Though of course, you can change your seat if you want… Mostly it’s just the change of protein, which is kinda easy to see, but, Maki, yours and Kaito’s have sauces that don’t have chiles in them, which I wanted to make sure wouldn’t get confused so…yeah.”

“Wow… My mouth is already watering!” a bright, nasally voice laughed out, Kokichi and Kaito bringing up the last of their group. “Aw, you guys! This looks amazing!”

Doppio flushed red, looking away. “Thanks…”

“I never get to sit with Kaito anymore, I say we call Doppio a tyrant and insist everyone sits where their plates are.” Maki smirked, unflinching to Shuichi’s withering look.

“I only just married Kaito, I’m still in honeymoon mode, he sits with me.” Shuichi sniffed, raising his chin lightly. 

Kaito, in turn, was carrying his usual baby backpack, along with said baby, and was currently wincing and bent over as Miyako kept her steel grip on his goatee. “I-I’d be way more flattered to overhear that if I knew it wasn’t literally just you two trying to mess with each other. We’re not playing this game today, you two sit together, I’m gonna sit between Tim and Kokichi.”

“I wanna sit with Arven,” Timothy said from where he was squatting with the dogs, behind Chief’s head.

Arven raised an eyebrow. “...you do??”

Kaito rolled his eyes, before wincing again. “Ow, ow, ow, Miyaaaaaa~ baby, let’s take it a little easy on Dad, you’ve got so much little baby muscle, ow.”

Kokichi smiled fondly. Aw…dog bonding. And kids who liked playing pranks on his husband. If they could manage to encourage Arven to feel more passionately about school, Kokichi would jump for joy seeing Tim decide on a role model like Arven. Well, he was happy about it regardless, and it was very sweet, but as an uncle there was some obligation to encourage good habits. 

“C’mon, Miyaaaa,” Kokichi cooed, softly tapping his daughter’s iron grip. “I know you already got a yummy dinner, wasn’t that nice? It’d be nice to let Dad have one too, one he put a lot of work in for. Miiiiiyaaaa.”

Doppio just sort of looked around everyone with a mild panic before he made a small, stressed sound and just plopped himself on a stool. Everyone could figure out seating around him, he at least would protect Amaina from errant hands from one side. 

Amaina, indeed, was protected… except she flew up to Miyako. Excited to see her favorite little happy baby, landing on her stomach and immediately starting slow, small spins of dance, soft music playing around her. Miyako’s eyes widened with wonder as she saw this, losing focus on her hand as Kaito let out a small breath of relief as her grip loosened. “Babe, babe, that’s working, pull her wrist now, we’ve got an opening.”

Shuichi, grabbing his fish, did indeed go to sit with Maki, the two having been spending time with each other when Kaito had come to fetch them and they were content to keep their playful bickering going, as Shuichi teased Maki with an invitation to try a bite of his fish, while Maki wrinkled her nose at the spice she could smell on it. Though, as Shuichi tried his fish himself--

“...oh! This is actually good?” Shuichi said, quickly grabbing another bite after spending a moment waiting to see if his taste buds were lying to him. “Hmm! That’s unexpected.”

“What’s unexpected about it!? Doppio’s talented, I told you!” Kaito said, adjusting Miyako on his chest now that his chin was free.

“Well, sure, but… you were also cooking.” Shuichi smirked. “Isn’t this your first time making fish?”

“I am also a talented fledgling chef!”

“Sure, if wood chips aren’t around to use as seasoning, maybe.” Maki snickered.

“And Doppio made the fish.” Kaito huffed, “...and also basically held my hand through the rest of it. So yes! It’s all gonna be good! Eat up, Doppio’s made us a homemade meal!”

“It’s excellent, Doppio, thank you,” Shuichi said fondly, diving into the food again.

Jumping into action at go time, Kokichi gently guided Miyako’s hand away from Kaito’s face, smiling softly at the awed attention in her eyes. Now what had Little Miss Miyako found now? …Kokichi hoped she hadn’t stumbled into anyone’s brain, but…well, he didn’t feel any tethers and…he’d enjoy her joy for the time being. 

While he was still feeling a bit anxious and overwhelmed, Doppio took on a bit of an affronted look at Shuuichi’s comment. He was glad the prince was enjoying the fish, of course, but…why was that so surprising?!

That became apparent soon, and Doppio gaped at Kaito. “Wood chips??”

Snickering, Kokichi took his own seat, affectionately pressing his foot to Kaito’s leg when they were settled. “Prevailing theory was someone had left some fire starter for the ovens out on the counter, and my poor guy was tryin’ to spice up a plate. The eggs he made then I’m still saying were very good!”

…still, that was a lot, but Doppio was willing to let it go with a sigh as he shyly gave Shuuichi a grin. “I’m glad you like it.”

As they all started to dig in, Kokichi tilted his head a little. “...is something wrong, Doppio?” The teen had…just been watching them all, not touching his own plate…which was notably just the salad and broccoli, which…yeah, Kokichi figured, because he was a vegetarian, but…did Doppio not make a main part of the meal for himself?

“Wha-?” Doppio blinked in surprise. “No?”

…he didn’t even realize it, really. That he was looking for proper enjoyment, if not just approval before starting to eat himself.

“What’s more valiant? Perfecting a skill you already have innate talent in? Or crawling up from being terrible at something to competent? My food is usually edible these days!” Kaito huffed, taking a seat with Kokichi as adjusted Miyako in her sling. 

Though, he glanced at his husband, then Doppio, as Kokichi asked him what was wrong. 

…oh. 

This had been a problem with Maki and Shuichi, once upon a time.

Oh… oh, that kinda sucked. This was not Kaito’s favorite kinda trauma to see in his, uh, ‘people he cares about in a reasonable way for the amount of time he’s known them and definitely not love because that’d be crazy’. Wanting them to feel free to eat, either before or with you. Though, now that he was noticing it, it made sense. Doppio had likely spent most of his meals eating with the person he served. And if the person you served was a bastard? Like Luminary leadership generally was, and how ‘the boss’ definitely was, then eating with them was a demeaning act in itself.

Arven, in turn, had started eating his steak– Timothy sat on his other side, glancing at Arven every now and again as he cut his steak, Amaina digging into her plate enthusiastically now in between Arven and Doppio’s plate– before humming in appreciation, “Wow, Doppio, I need the recipe for the sauce you coated the steak in. This is incredible.”

Kaito suddenly grinned sheepishly. “Hey, Doppio, how’d the broccoli come out? I worried I cut some of them wrong, let me know if the stem is too stiff, yeah?”

Doppio smiled, something relaxing in his shoulders as he saw everyone digging in and eating, and without thinking about it he finally started too. “It’s a chimichurri, so… I mean, I read that it’s a combo sauce, so you pick an ingredient each of an herb, fat, acid, aromatic, and spice, and…any combination of that would be that kind of sauce. I, uh, altered this particular one a little though, by making the herbs a split base of parsley and southern basil, since I liked the peppery kick the basil brought without having to add any spices… And it still keeps that aspect, without adding any heat, if you ditch the chiles.” He nodded a little towards Maki and Kaito. 

Blinking, Doppio nodded at Kaito and cut some of the stalks of the broccoli off to try. There was no way to tell, really, which stalks he’d cut and which Kaito had, but… He smiled softly at the prince. “They seem good so far. I’d hope the broiler did its thing enough that the stems would be fine, but…well, it tastes good.”

Kokichi, just as Kaito had described, was having an experience. The fish was fluffy and savory, but still had enough lightness from the lemon, and could stand up to the sauce which brought a whole new dimension of just high impact flavor, the broccoli had a mildly charred taste in the best way and let the flavor of the vegetable stand on its own more that Kokichi usually had, and the pasta salad was just a party of different textures and tastes that could all play together so well and--

Kokichi was swaying on his stool a little, eyes closed blissfully as he chewed. 

Doppio turned red, but the smile pointed down at his plate was proud and smug.

Kaito chuckled, idly reaching around to rub Kokichi’s back, before going back to his food, finally ready to eat himself. “Miyaaaaa, see this broccoli? Dad helped make this broccoli~ Do you want a nibble, baby? Just a little nibble off vegetables?”

“No, Kaito,” Shuichi called from the other side of the counter, “We have months still before she can taste anything. And her first food is not going to be broccoli.”

“It should be cake,” Timothy said, nodding with certainty, “If you can pick what a person’s first food is? It should be cake.”

“Don’t listen to the heathens, Miya,” Kaito whispered to her, while Miyako gave her father a fascinated look as he made a broccoli floret dance on a fork in front of her. “I’m gonna convert you before all these sugar fiends get a chance to. It’s gonna be you and me, princess, protein and vegetables against the world.”

“So, Kaito, do you work out, like… every day?” Arven asked, raising an eyebrow. “I never see you doing it.”

“What about him makes you think he works out every day?” Maki scoffed.

“They didn’t see what he looked like before,” Shuichi whispered.

“Okay, ow. Let’s be nice, guys,” Kaito said dryly, before turning to Arven, “I’ve actually fallen off on my regular exercise routine this last year, so yeah, I’ve been losing some muscle mass lately. But I do still exercise! I usually do my runs in the morning, with my little Miyako here as my running mate, and if I’m up early enough I’ll run with Tim and Maki to a certain point before they outrace me. Other than that, I just do pushups and situps when I have a spare moment in the day and I happen to think about it. Why, are you looking for exercise advice?” 

“No, I just know what your days look like, and doing deadlifts with an infant all day doesn’t usually end up with a person looking like you,” Arven said, “I was half curious if you used to do more strenuous things in Luminary, I guess.”

Kaito nodded. “More working out, definitely. People always assume that if you stop doing things regularly, you’ll lose all your gains immediately, but nah. It’s a gradual thing. But I’ll get back on my more intense workouts someday!”

“Wanna bet money on how long it takes for him to shrink to 200?” Maki whispered to Shuichi.

“Give me an hour to do the math and yeah, I’ll bet you.” Shuichi smirked.

“Cake seems like a good contender,” Kokichi nodded with approval. “Though it’d probably end up being, like…cake soaked in something, even if it’s just a little bit, since she still won’t be able to chew. Aw, I can’t wait to show her applesauce…I’m pretty sure cinnamon in a tiny amount like that would be alright.”

Doppio raised an eyebrow, looking wholly skeptical of the concept that Kaito had once been bigger, but…Shuuichi and Maki’s jokes wouldn’t make much sense if he wasn’t… “You’re already enormous, how could you’ve been bigger? That’s ridiculous. …also, aren’t you, like, already decaying or something? You should probably just quit while all your joints still work.”

“R’g–ing??” Kaito said through a mouthful of steak, before thumping his chest, swallowing as he sighed. “Ngh, my bad. Decaying!? Who’s decaying!?”

“Gyah!” Miyako cried valiantly.

“Nah, he’s got at least another decade, I think,” Arven whispered to Doppio. 

Not softly enough to not be heard though, as Kaito balked, “A decade for what!? My joints to stop working!? Why are my joints not working??”

“This is how we find out Doppio’s been doing a long con to poison you,” Maki said, chewing on her steak as she gave Kaito a bored look. “Still feel your fingers? How about the inside of your mouth? Tingling? Be sure to pass over Miyako to Kokichi before you pass out and die.”

“Ha ha, very funny Maki,” Kaito scoffed. “...though, seriously, Arven, Doppio, if you’ve played another prank on my food–”

Timothy raised his eyebrows, before looking up at Arven, admiration in his eyes as he asked, “Did you poison my dad?”

“No!” Arven said, looking down at Timothy… before he couldn’t help but say conspiratorially, “I mean, not this time…”

“Wow,” Timothy whispered.

“With the pace he’s going? Well, he did shake off the tree…” Doppio whispered back. 

Though louder, he scoffed a little, idly eating. “It’d be pointless to use a long-term poison on you by this point. Even feeling faint and sick, you’d probably still burst into whatever I’m doing and insist even more than you weren’t feeling sick at all.” Doppio gave him a dry look. “Since your muscles are, apparently, somehow, immunization fighters.”

Kokichi snorted softly, though he had looked a bit worried over the rest of the conversation. “Unfortunately joint problems can happen at any age…as can illness. …even if you are okay, though, hun, I can take Miya-Miya if you wanna eat more comfortably.”

“Miyaaaaa~ Daddy’s trying to steal you away from meeee~” Kaito whispered to her, Miyako gasping at this terrible news. Or yawning. Little baby half yawn. Could have been a gasp though. “But, dad can’t be selfish wanting to hold his bouncing baby love. And also it’s really tough to cut steak like this, sooooooo~”

Miyako looked confused as dad adjusted his sling off himself, before her brow furrowed in indignation as she was passed off to Daddy. DING? DING DING DING– “Stop pouting, Miyako, it’s Daddy! You like Daddy! He’s the one who’s gonna spoil you with candy when you’re older, so let's be nice to him… and me.” Kaito winced, another ding running through his head.

Kokichi ducked himself into the sling, adjusting it for his smaller shoulders before he gave Kaito a fond look. But soon enough he mentally reached out to Miyako, giving her those nice brain paps she liked. “Oh look who it is, my little sweetbun~ Fallen into Daddy’s devious plot to steal you away. Dad’s gonna need to go on a whole epic adventure to come rescue you~ Won’t that be a fun story to hear later? Miyaaaa, you love Dad’s stories.”

As Kokichi continued quietly trying to coax Miyako into a better mood, Doppio just watched for a moment. Taking in the moment between parent and child. 

…he…obviously never had anything like that. So why was it… Not familiar. But something…

Wincing a little, Doppio rubbed his temple. Ugh, probably not worth thinking about. Turning to Arven, he softly asked, “Do you still have homework to do tomorrow? I dunno if it’d count ‘cause it’s the weekend…”

Kaito gave Kokichi a warm, adoring look. Seemed like he had multiple storytimes to look forward to. Captain Kaito, Luminary Starship Explorer of the Cosmos! …might be the next ‘character’ Kaito tested on little Miyako. He’d search for her through the constellations. It’d be a way to add in some of his space knowledge to her stories.

“No, I got all my work done today. The weekend is totally free,” Arven said, watching Kokichi coo sweetly to Miyako as her pouting lessened. Leaning in to Doppio and whispering to him, a genuine whisper just between the two of them, “...kinda hard to watch sometimes, huh? Keep finding myself wondering if my mom ever treated me like that.”

Doppio nodded slightly, before frowning. Looking down for a moment before he bolstered his courage, leaning back towards Arven too. “...I hope she did. Even if…a-at least to me, that kinda…makes the fact that she stopped worse. But I kinda… It makes me happier to think that someone doted over you like that, once.”

Under the lip of the counter, Doppio reached over, squeezing Arven’s knee in a way he hoped was comforting and…in solidarity. 

…it was good, that the princes loved their kids so much. Doppio was happy for it. …but he couldn’t say it didn’t sting, a bit.

Arven smiled lightly. “You know… I hope so too,” he whispered, leaning into Doppio a little.

He wanted it almost entirely because Doppio wanted it. And Arven was a little flustered and happy that Doppio would want something like that for him. He thought it was sweet, that Doppio cared that Arven had been loved and treated sweetly as a baby. If it’d make his boyfriend happy, then Arven would prefer to imagine he did as well.

Something Kokichi had done had apparently gotten through, because Miyako suddenly lit up, giggling as he played with her chin. 

“You know, Kokichi, Doppio ended up scolding me about alcohol.” Kaito snickered, eating through his steak. It really was very good. “I thought you might appreciate it. Something blah, blah, blah, being inappropriate to day-drink, or drink while trying to make a meal, something like that. Isn’t he responsible?”

“Did you try to drink the alcohol seasoning?” Shuichi asked dryly.

“You guessed it so fast, handsome~” Kaito laughed. “It was bad. Not good stuff. Made me wish we actually did have some wine, just to remind myself what good alcohol tasted like.” 

Kokichi snorted softly, eyes glancing down briefly to make sure he hadn’t startled Miyako with his laughter before he gave Doppio an amused look. “I can really see that. Since you two met out drinking, I’d think you’d’ve given up any credibility on any sort of drinking-scolding, hun--that makes sense. But getting the reverse is very funny…” Snickering softly, he raised an eyebrow. “I thought taste-testing while cooking was pretty normal, though?”

Looking to the side, Doppio just shrugged, tinting a little. “I-I didn’t say anything about day-drinking,” he’d stopped himself before that, “And I just said that I don’t really like drinking while I’m cooking, even to, um, test the alcohol I might be using but, uh… I think you’re right, that that’s normal.”

“And, uh, cooking sake is just particularly bad to drink straight, other stuff is…” Doppio blinked. “Uh…” 

It didn’t…really feel like anything different to Kokichi. In a lot of ways, there was nothing even to notice, and he wouldn’t have if not for, as Doppio trailed off, his gaze going a little unfocused. The physical sign much more apparent than anything else. 

“...” Doppio didn’t say, his brain stalling out. 

Kokichi glanced to Kaito and Arven, wondering if they had…been through something like this before, or if Doppio just needed a second…

Arven started to look worried, while Kaito just frowned. “Aceto..?” Arven asked, looking at him a tad earnestly.

“Something wrong with him?” Timothy asked plainly, picking up on the anxious feeling running through Arven, peeking around him curiously.

“Nah,” Kaito said immediately, before grinning a little, waving a little to catch Doppio’s attention, “Doppio, everything’s fine~ You know where you are, kid?”

“...”

…okay, Kokichi really didn’t want to just pop in on, well, any kid, really, when he started to get a little worried about them, but as Doppio didn’t respond to either Arven or Kaito, he was really starting to consider it. At the very least, he didn’t seem to be distressed any, so--

Another blink, before gold eyes focused, looking around. 

…long counters. Plated food…looked like a dinner meal? Still warm… And, uh…

Doppio balked a little, shrinking away towards Arven (good sign, that Arven was there) as he whispered, “Why’s everyone staring at me?”

Shuichi, immediately, sipped at his water, looking away politely. Maki just continued to stare, her expression searching, memorizing for herself future signs of danger. Timothy had been about to go back to eating, but seeing his mom continue to stare, went back to staring, though this time looking like he was also staring intently, trying to learn something… though he wasn’t sure what. 

Kaito, seeing that, sighed, “Tim, we didn’t make a dessert, why don’t you go downstairs and steal whatever sweets they’ve got laid out for us. Bring enough back for everyone, kay?”

Timothy pouted, before rolling his eyes and sighing, getting up and heading out, Chase at his heels. “The sass on that kid,” Kaito muttered, before looking back to Doppio, grinning again.

“You stopped talking in the middle of your sentence,” Arven explained, “They had been staring because you were talking.”

“Might have just lost a little bit of time there kid,” Kaito grinned, “Which, awww, that’s a shame, I had so much wisdom and knowledge I shared with you today! You were so grateful for it! You said you were excited to hear me give you more advice in excruciating detail later! …unless you remember making dinner with me and know that I’m full of it. How far back you remember, Doppio?”

Doppio watched in confusion as Kaito…got Timothy out of the room. Remarkably like how he tried with Arven, sometimes. Ugh, he really needed to talk to Kaito about that shit, Arven didn’t deserve to… Wait… Uh…

“...okay?” Doppio mumbled, feeling just…more confused and…kind of embarrassed with Arven’s explanation, which Kaito’s elaboration just exacerbated too. Though, he didn’t hold back giving Kaito an annoyed scowl. “Don’t have to remember to know that you’re making stuff up.”

“I’m sorry if we’re making you uncomfortable, Doppio,” Kokichi said softly, unphased by the brief surprised look the teen gave him, “But…well, at least for me, this is the first time I’ve seen you deal with lost time, potentially, so…I got a bit worried. Would you rather not have it pointed out, or…?”

“N-no,” Doppio stammered, looking a little frustrated along with everything else now. “It’s, uh, just…” He huffed, glaring at the edge of the counter. 

…he…and Kaito made dinner together? That was…this. Definitely. So those two things were ‘today’, and…

He glanced up, squinting at Kaito. “...you two talked about stuff,” he nodded both to Arven and Kaito. Before looking back down and…seeming a bit more unsure about things. “...there…aren’t any apples here, and it isn’t raining…”

Despite his offer, a more worried frown made its way onto Kokichi’s face. 

“...didn’t have to descale fish ‘cause…” Doppio squinted more. “...we were on a roof? But…wait, we didn’t even make it to another…” Chewing on his lip, Doppio covered his mouth, eyes lowered as…

Well, it was kind of like working on a puzzle. It had mostly been done, at one point, but then the table had been flipped over and the pieces went everywhere and now… Doppio was looking at a bunch of scattered pieces, some stuck together still, and some by others that…looked like they could be part of the same area, but weren’t quite fitting together when he tried it out. 

His gaze fell on the miniature plate of food he’d…made for Amaina. Baffled why it was…out. 

Amaina looked up… before pouting. Holding up her fork like a sword, as she said, No take-backsies now! This is mine, I am EATING so rude

Kaito’s eyes followed Doppio’s gaze, not seeing anything. Maki’s did as well, her eyes narrowing as she did. Arven glanced back and forth between Doppio and Amaina, then up at the table, and realizing the issue, slapped the table where Amaina was sitting. “Got it! Fly, saw a fly, I got it. Now nothing’s there.”

Amaina, now flat as a pancake, gasped, her eyes wide and wobbling with tears. H-how dare… r-ruuuuude… evil senpai….

Kaito raised an eyebrow at Arven, before looking to Doppio again. “Want some blanks filled in, or want to keep working on it? It sounds like you’re getting a lot of it already! Maybe talking it out loud might get the rest of the memories back?”

“No trigger I noticed. Did you?” Maki whispered to Shuichi, who shook his head. 

While he was supremely confused, Doppio still had enough wits about him to not hold his hands up in surrender to Amaina’s ire. Though he still had that energy about him, as his eyebrows tilted up a bit. …okay, so the little plate that he…yeah. That he made Amaina was just…fine being out? Apparently? …probably already solved, he should just not question it. 

That was just how he should…always treat things when things like this happened, to be honest. Things had already progressed normally; him questioning the flow was just…self-sabotage. If things went fine once, he shouldn’t give disaster another chance to strike. After all, he just…

Doppio jumped a little as Arven squished Amaina, giving him a quick saddened look (and missing the one that Kokichi gave him in the process) before sighing. “...does it matter that much? We’re just…eating, I guess? So, unless someone needed something from me that we already discussed?”

“...it matters as much as you want it to, I suppose,” Kokichi said softly, “But… I dunno. I think you’re entitled to your own experiences, Doppio. I don’t think any of us would be annoyed recapping what happened, if you wanted to know.”

Doppio shrugged, looking mildly frustrated again. 

Kaito laughed, putting up his finger as he said, “Well, first things first! You and I had a heart to heart, and you told me that I was the smartest, most well adjusted, most incredibly correct person, especially in regards to anything and everything regarding shenanigans– EEP! Maki, not at the table! Counter! Oh, shoot, am I going to have to get the counter fixed?”

“Don’t tell lies to an amnesiac,” Maki said, eyes narrowing as Kaito pulled the steak knife out of the countertop, rubbing his thumb over the scratch like he could smudge it away. “Do you wanna die? You don’t know what he’ll believe.”

“Trust me, if I can convince the kid of anything, it’s not that he’s suddenly and spontaneously respected my decisions as the adult in his life.” Kaito pouted, glancing at his husband from the corner of his eyes before gently nudging his plate over the scratch, like somehow he could possibly hide the fact that it had happened to Kokichi by this point. “Doppio, you offered to teach me how to make all this food this morning as payback for stuff you really don’t need to pay me back for, really. I took you up on it anyway though, because who’s gonna turn down the chance to learn how to make really good steaks and fish? And they came out really good! Kudos to the chef!”

“You and Kaito went to the market together to get the supplies,” Shuichi continued, “And somehow, that trip led to Kaito buying two living clams and claiming them as pets. Which you apparently encouraged enough to name them.”

“The Orecchiettes!” Kaito grinned, “Ori and Chie! Best pets ever!”

“Literally less stimulating than plants,” Arven said dryly, “I literally cannot think of worse pets.”

“I’ll reintroduce you to them if you can’t remember them, they already love their Uncle Doppio.” Kaito beamed happily, before looking at the door. “Ah, Tim! Brought back goodies?”

“I stole a pie,” Timothy said proudly, bringing it over to the counter.

“Ha haaaa… Chako’s gonna kill me,” Kaito muttered.

The frustration was soon soothed into utter exasperation, Doppio not believing Kaito for a second. He knew he tended to be…a little more on the gullible side, he thought, though he tried to counteract it with healthy (often shot in the dark) skepticism, due in small part thanks to his memory issues but…

Come on. There was no world Doppio would ever, like…fawn over Kaito and call him well-adjusted and unequivocally correct. 

Though, he did jump a little at the sudden knife in the table, eyes widening and looking around, alert for anything else, before…ah. Well. It was, uh…a nice enough sentiment, he supposed…

“There could definitely be worse pets,” Kokichi sighed. Sure, clams were a bit…quirky, and knowing how much Kaito already loved them Kokichi had gone on a tear, trying to make sure his plan would be able to accommodate Ori and Chie, but…really? Kokichi was just thankful Kaito hadn’t come back with, ugh, a crab. Or any other creepy crawly ocean critter with too many legs. Ori and Chie had no legs, and Kokichi was more than happy for that…along with just seeing Kaito’s happiness, of course. 

“Though, uh…” Kokichi gave Doppio a concerned look, “You did have a panic attack while you guys were out, so if you feel drained today and you’re not sure why…that’s probably it.”

Doppio frowned, giving Kokichi a wary look before he blinked as Tim returned with a pie, a small, “Oh,” leaving him before he gave Kaito a knowing look. “You just learned how to make pies!”

Kaito looked a little surprised… before snorting. Laughing behind his arm, before giving him a wink back. “There you go, absolutely! Guys, anyone asks, I absolutely baked that pie. We have no idea what happened to that other pie! Pie thieves, man, they’re rampant!”

Arven got up to help Timothy slice up the pie into portions, looking back and forth between Kaito and Doppio. Huh… “You yelled at Kaito on my behalf too,” Arven said, passing the pies around. Then he glanced at Timothy, before amending, “Or, scolded him, really, more than yelled.”

Timothy looked unsurprised. His dad often needed to be yelled at. He wasn’t going to be scandalized by that.

Kaito waved his hand dismissively. “We got it figured out. And if you don’t remember, we can talk about it before story-time tonight.”

“I’m sorry, what?” Arven said.

Kaito suddenly grinned. All teeth. “Yeah. Story time. It’s happening.”

“You did a science lab with Arven this morning too,” Shuichi filled in, “If you’re unsure that far back, I mean. Turns out you have a talent for math.”

Doppio, again, looked a little confused, his moment of confident clarity gone. He…wasn’t sure what was so funny, or what that look from Arven was. He…he had remembered that right, right? It seemed so…clear. A bit of information without ambiguity--Kaito told him he’d just learned how to bake pies, and so they had been on his mind. 

…now, he couldn’t really remember what the conversation surrounding that fact had been like, so maybe that was what was weird about it, but… Still, Doppio just shrank back in his seat a little. 

Kokichi sighed. He’d put in an order to get the counter fixed, and check in with the kitchen about the pie later. …but yay~ A pie just for them~

“Oh, okay…yeah, I was kinda thinking about that, but something felt…” Doppio huffed, getting up to fetch small dessert plates, since Arven and Tim had the pie itself handled. …he could probably fork off a bit of his slice to “act” as Amaina’s easily enough. “...I dunno, ‘repetitive’ makes it seem like I definitely knew we already talked. A sense of it being a little useless, I guess…”

Nodding a little distractedly as he helped distribute the pie to the others, Doppio hummed. “I do remember that… That was today? Guess so… Um…I wouldn’t really call it a talent, though,” he shrugged. “I’m just…efficient at it.”

Kokichi laughed softly. “That sounds like a talent to me. Shuu-chan doesn’t praise idly, and the way he described it to me…well, if I’m honest, your skill is kinda envy-inducing, Doppio. I hate math,” he huffed, “So being able to be quick at mental math sounds incredible.”

…incredible?

Turning pink, Doppio just shrugged, eyes focused down on his pie, trying to cut off the end precisely enough to mimic the shape in miniature form.

OoO Pieeeeeeeee! 

As Amaina fluttered about, excited for her own miniature slice, Kaito sighed, looking incredibly put out. “Repetitive? Geez, way to kick a guy when he’s down.”

“You do tend to need to have the same conversation three times before it sinks in, Kaito,” Maki pointed out. “Also, what’s ‘down’ about you right now? You seem like you’re having a good day to me.”

Kaito grinned, nodding. “I am, actually. Today was a lot of fun, Doppio’s a great teacher. Even if he insists on being endlessly mean to me.”

“Oh! I locked Kaito in the storage closet,” Arven whispered to Doppio, “You weren’t there, but it was very funny, so I want to be sure you remember that that happened.”

Then, even quieter, he whispered, “They can’t see Amaina’s plate. She’s doing something to everyone's perception of it, it’s invisible to them. Just, uh, let her eat the pie off your plate.”

OPO Amaina drooled, staring hopefully at her piece.

Doppio looked a bit confused but…well, what else was new? So he didn’t bother saying anything. If Kaito really did need to have the same conversation a couple times, then, well, Doppio shouldn’t have heeded his own instincts, but that was what he’d meant. It wasn’t quite like…like a feeling of deja vu, because Doppio really didn’t remember what he’d told Kaito. Just, when it had occurred to him to talk to Kaito about how he treated Arven…it didn’t feel like an urgent conversation, like he definitely could remember it feeling before. And if not urgent, then pressing, at least. The sort of feeling like having that conversation would be a waste of time, but not because Kaito wouldn’t listen. 

…whatever. It wasn’t that important, he supposed. 

He pouted a little at Kaito, not sure what to feel between the compliment and…exaggeration? But, as usual, Arven saved him, and…

Doppio snorted, covering his mouth as he giggled softly. “No, really?” he whispered back to Arven. “You did something really cool, I bet, to keep him from just running out…pff, wow.”

But… Ah… Glancing over briefly, Doppio gave Amaina a small, impressed nod. Moving the small piece of pie closer to the edge of his own plate, hopefully hidden by the rest of his slice to avoid weird questions. 

No one had really said they needed anything from him, when he asked (and that was a little… Doppio wasn’t really sure how to feel about that), other than, sorta, Kaito’s story time, but he hadn’t said what time that was, and if they were having dinner then it wasn’t that late in the evening, so…

“...do you wanna go explore the gardens some, after I finish cleaning up here?” he asked Arven in a whisper, still. “Could be a sorta walk for Chief too, I think…”

“You and Kai-chan put in a lot of effort, making us all dinner, Doppio,” Kokichi hummed, Doppio’s whisper not quite as private as he’d thought. “If you two wanna head out, we can take care of the dishes here.”

Doppio jolted, giving Kokichi just a…bewildered and slightly offended look. “N-no, I mean, I…was? The one to bring this up in the first place, and…it really won’t take long…”

…and he was pretty sure someone had told him that Prince Kokichi couldn’t wash dishes for the life of him.

Kaito, in turn, gave Kokichi a dry look around a bite of pie. “Uh huh. Sure we can. Totally.”

“I’d love to walk around the garden! Chief’s probably needing a leak by now, honestly. You just made him a whole doggy meal after all.” Arven grinned, looking over at his big dog, who was laying down as Chase played with his ears, nipping and biting at them. “Let them take care of the dishes, Aceto. You really did spend all day preparing this meal, you deserve a break.”

Kokichi gave Kaito a bright and innocent look in return. “Of course! Though, if everyone else wouldn’t want to, I guess I could just express my thanks for the meal alone…” 

He fully knew that Maki and Shuuichi were immune to that sort of guilt tripping but…it was a little fun to play along anyway. And either way, he’d try to make sure Kaito wasn’t going to be left to clean everything alone…even if his contribution was only moral support. 

But even if Doppio seemed set on it…Kokichi’s only real goal was to free up the teen’s evening. It probably wouldn’t feel like a solution to those ‘useless’ feelings, but…Kokichi didn’t know. Doppio had probably never cooked a meal he didn’t have to clean up immediately after. Kokichi just…wanted to give him a little freedom. Make his thanks clear, conveying that…he didn’t need to keep doing thing after thing to be ‘enough’. Doppio had already done something kind for them…he was already more than enough. 

Doppio had been ready to argue further, but once Arven agreed with the prince, he hesitated. Giving his boyfriend a nervous, uneasy look. “...I’m pretty sure I took a nap earlier, so…it wasn’t all day…”

Arven grinned. “Well, then I deserve a break, because I didn’t get to spend any leisure time with you today–” This was strictly a lie, they had actually laid with each other for a while, chatting. But he’d remind Doppio of that later, after they had successfully escaped. “Come on, let’s go do couple stuff together in the garden.”

He said that specifically because he could feel Timothy’s gaze boring into his back, Tim trying to think how he could ask to come along… before his nose wrinkled. Ew. He didn’t want to be around couple stuff. No thanks.

But while that worked, Kaito suddenly looked alarmed. “Eh? Eh? What couple stuff? No couple stuff! You’re both still technically on bed rest!”

Arven snickered, grabbing Doppio’s elbow and pulling him along. “Come on, before he has a conniption.”

Well, if there was ever a way to get Doppio to do something…

Rolling his eyes a little, though his cheeks flushed, Doppio followed the tug on his elbow and got up. He gave the dishes one last nervous look before he huffed, frowning at Kaito. “Don’t forget to clean the ceiling too! If I come back to check and I see you didn’t, you’ll never hear the end of it, Kaito.”

And, leaving Prince Kokichi looking befuddled up at the ceiling, Doppio trotted out of the kitchen with Arven. Though when they were farther down the hall…

Giving Arven a shy look, Doppio asked, “Um… Did…you want to do, uh, couple stuff? Or were you just trying to freak Kaito out?”

Arven laughed, before leaning in to steal a kiss from Doppio. “I can have multiple reasons to want to do something. Let’s go find a nice bush to make out under~”

-

It was, in fact, a straight up bush they had found.

It was a large, decorative bush. Arven had seen them grow like this in the wild, at times, but it was far more common in gardens, a large, tall, fat bush where the form was more from multiple roots all entangling each other in a perfect circle, each thinner bush growing up indistinguishable from each other, looking like one large, massive bush together. 

And in its center was a small, perfectly circular patch of grass. Sunny as the bush leaves thinned near the top, letting the sun shine in, enough sunlight that a few small yellow flowers dotted around the grass. As the wind whistled through the leaves, Chief’s little huffing pants as he sat diligently outside the bush like a reassuring guard dog, Arven couldn’t help but feel like they had discovered something special. Something a little outside of time and space and this plane of existence… even if all it was was just a spacious, hollow bush on a warm, sunny day. 

And knowing they weren’t going any further? Arven had relaxed into just making out with Doppio. Which they had been doing for a, uh… hot minute now. Arven had meant to just talk with Doppio for a bit about his memory loss when they discovered the bush, but, well, Doppio had looked pretty in the broken sunbeams through the leaves, and still smelled that strong sunlight scent, and Arven was merely human. So making out had come first.

But as he broke the kiss, needing to catch his breath and let some of the heat off of his face, Arven rested his head on his bicep, his other hand resting on Doppio’s waist, “...anything else from the day come back yet?”

Doppio had never seen anything like it, really. Sure, people manicured and coaxed plants into all sorts of shapes and arrangements, and maybe a domed ring wasn’t a particularly inspired shape but… Encasing a patch of grass, but still firmly outdoors, nature peeking in through the form of the yellow flowers… 

It was definitely one of those special, beautiful things to see in the world. And lucky Doppio, he got to see it with Arven without any planning. 

Not that Doppio was doing much looking around, really. 

Panting lightly, Doppio just…admired the way Arven’s hair fell into the grass, almost perfectly a flower poking through. In every way, and more Doppio was learning, Arven just seemed…meant for the outdoors. Like some…he didn’t know. Symbol manifested as a person, or…

(Doppio had never heard of a wood nymph, but his ideas would be pretty suited to the comparison.)

Blinking slowly, it took Doppio a second to process what Arven asked, his brain having to work through several layers of thought to get there, such as, wow…Arven’s lips were really pretty… 

Doppio huffed a small, bashful laugh as he trailed his fingertips down Arven’s arm. “...I asked you to lie on top of me. I…I think I remember all that, pretty well now. Just had to piece the timing back together…” He snorted, tipping his head against the grass. “...thanks again for not…I dunno. Thinking that’s too weird.”

“You got soooooo sleepy and sooooo cute, when I did that.” Arven chuckled, shifting slightly on the grass, calm and relaxed, the smell of grass against his skin and the taste of Doppio still drying on his lips. “It was great. Feel free to ask for that any time, it was adorable.”

“That meal was really good,” Arven murmured, closing his eyes as he enjoyed the feeling of Doppio’s fingers on his arm. Mmmmm… cozy… “Though, next time let me make some sushi rolls out of the fish. Love a good sushi roll. Especially with how you season them? Perfect comfort food.”

“And you defended me from Kaito. Or, well, you scolded him for being mean to me. But it was okay, because that inspired me to go yell at him too, and he apologized. So… thank you,” Arven smirked, opening his eyes, before leaning forward to place a small kiss at the tip of Doppio’s nose, “For that. Any other questions about what happened during your day?”

“That feels like a dangerous offer, saying ‘any time’.” Doppio grinned, adoring just how comfortable Arven looked right then. Maybe he did understand his boyfriend’s feelings, since sleepy and cute was what he was looking at right in front of him. Well, maybe more just…relaxed, than sleepy, but…still. “Might start really asking for it. Force Chief to start a dogpile, just ‘cause you’ll already be on top of me at night.”

Smiling more as Arven praised his cooking again (an enjoyment that persisted after the meal… Doppio really liked that) Doppio hummed happily, tapping the side of his shoe against Arven’s. “We should definitely cook together again soon… I haven’t really done much with sushi, to be honest; always kind of intimidated me. I’d love to see how you approach it… And I could get a better fish for sushi, even if I keep the seasoning.”

As Arven kissed his nose, Doppio let loose another one of those embarrassing, smitten giggles, his nose scrunching a little as he grinned before he stole another peck. 

GAH! How could someone be this cute!?

“You’re welcome. It was about damn time, really, he can’t just…go around treating you like that. Jerk.” Doppio rolled his eyes a little, before…

…it was such a nice moment, right then. He didn’t want to ruin it… But, well, maybe…maybe it could just be brief, so…

“...do…uh,” Doppio mumbled softly, “That panic attack, Prince Kokichi mentioned… Do you know what set it off? Or…was I just being… You know.”

“I don’t know,” Arven admitted, sighing a little, wishing he could explain, “This is actually the second memory dump you’ve had today. The panic attack got lost in the first one. I even asked you what might have happened, and you didn’t really wanna think about it. You had, uh…”

Arven paused. Maybe some things were better left forgotten. “...you had come back really tired and nauseous. If you really wanted to know, Kaito probably knows. All I know is it happened while you were on a roof.”

Doppio frowned, his eyebrows furrowing in with concern as he quietly mumbled, “Second? They don’t usually happen back-to-back…” Sure, he was fairly sure there were differences in how frequent his lapses were in any given span of time, and there was probably some distinction to make between, like…his blackouts, or just losing something in a blink, or…panic attack-induced amnesia. But…twice in the same day?

Nodding slightly, Doppio sighed. “...I kinda remember the roof. I think…” Doppio blinked slowly, looking up at the ring of bushes around them. “...I think he…offered? To braid my hair, at one point? …kinda weird. I mean…I think it’d be more weird if northern braids just didn’t exist in Luminary, but…I always thought they were more of a Dicean thing?” Doppio gave Arven a questioning look as he half-shrugged. “‘Cause they’re called ‘northern’, you know? Thought they came from the, uh…like, Erdansk, Gauçais kinda culture…stuff.”

Arven shrugged back. He really didn’t know much of anything about Luminary, outside of the rumors he had heard from random people in his travels, spread around in the thick of the war, where people weren’t exactly talking idly about nice Luminary customs, or things their cultures shared. “Maybe he’s full of it and thought if he sounded confident enough, he could figure it out on his own?”

Reaching out to smooth some of the hair Doppio had pulled back with his fingertips, Arven smiled. “I like your braid. Maybe I could learn how to braid your hair? I know how to make pretty good knots in rope, for climbing and such, so I’m not unfamiliar with knots in general. Then, if you ever needed help with your hair, and Kaito’s trying to be pushy about it, you can be like… back off, old man. My boyfriend’s got this.”

Arven smirked, giving Doppio a small wink. “And I would. And we could both laugh at him for being a weirdo.”

“Maybe… He sounded really sure, though. Not really like he was blustering, he gets a lot louder when he does that.”

Blushing a bit as Arven brushed back his hair…and mentioned them as boyfriends…and winked at him, Doppio grinned bashfully. “I’d hope you wouldn’t try to knot up my hair. I-I…um, you’ve said before you like seeing it down, so…no need for any plots. I can let it down if you ask, you know.”

Doppio flushed a bit more, feeling more flustered offering that and trying to be playful about it than he’d expected. “You did say I could, uh, braid your hair sometime so…we could practice. Together. I think.”

“Hmmmm…” Arven hummed, before suddenly smiling. Sitting up as he said, “Alright. I’ll trade you then. Put your hair down now, and you can braid my hair. Because as much as I love the braid, I do think you’re very pretty with your hair down. And…”

Arven suddenly blushed, his brain catching up with his boldness, as he looked away, turning red. “...it’d look nice. In the sunbeams, here, among the flowers… like a painting. I think,” Arven said, before coughing a little, blushing, “I’d like to see it.”

Doppio’s eyes widened in surprise, not having expected to, yanno, do it now, but… He blinked, feeling…kinda warmed by Arven’s bashfulness, before he laughed softly. Sitting up as well, Doppio reached up to pull out his scrunchie. “A true trade, since, um, that’s what I think about you. Feel like your hair is prettier here, just, uh…color-wise. Never really claimed to be an artist though.”

Cheeks dusted pink, Doppio knew he was rambling a little as he started unraveling his braids, pink starting to fall over his shoulders. His hair was straight, naturally, but especially right out of a braid, it tended to get a little wavy, holding the shape it’d just been in. 

“So, uh…” Doppio coughed, his turn to look away with a blush. It felt a little weird, his hair falling around his face from more than just his bangs… Tucking the non-bang side behind his ear (which Arven thought was cute…) Doppio shrugged, grinning nervously. “...what you’d hoped for?”

Arven had seen Doppio with his hair down before, of course, but…

He had been right. With the backdrop of leaves behind him, sunbeams kissing and shining at where his hair was falling, Arven leaned forward, his expression a mix of hopeful and bashful, those long lashes fluttering over wide, golden eyes that seemed to shimmer in the intermittent sunlight…

Arven couldn’t imagine what it was like, being that beautiful. Did Doppio ever just get caught up looking at himself? Arven thought that if he could be allowed to, he’d be tempted to spend all day looking at himself, if he looked like Doppio. Or maybe that was just how he felt now, wanting to look at Doppio all day. How could anyone look at him and want to do anything else?

Arven scooted forward, before carefully placing a hand against Doppio’s cheek, guiding his face towards him, so that he could lean in and kiss him again. Running his finger where Doppio had already tucked his hair back, letting his fingers run through it, before playing with the slightly wavy hair through his fingers. Felt like silk…

“You are, and I am being entirely sincere… prettier than anything I’ve ever seen in a picture.” Arven smiled against Doppio’s lips. “It’s not even a contest, Aceto. No art I’ve ever seen compares. Artists wish.”

It was a little overwhelming, the way Arven was looking at him. Doppio knew he…wasn’t just about to be ridiculed, or anything, that Arven’s…admiration was sincere, but…it felt like a lot. Doppio knew he was good looking, sure--he’d gotten enough comments to know that was a thing that was true. But with Arven it was like… It felt more… 

Doppio couldn’t even think of a way to describe it, only that he could only face an expression like that through side-glances. 

Though even overwhelmed and face a deep pink, Doppio held no qualms as Arven beckoned him and…it was a comfortable ease, pressing his lips to his boyfriend’s. Humming softly at the feeling of fingers running through his hair. 

“Sono bollito (I’m boiled),” Doppio huffed against those lovely lips before tipping his head a little to press his forehead against Arven’s. Draping his arms around his boyfriend’s waist. “I think you’ll actually make me turn red forever… C-can’t believe you can say that with a straight face too, when I know for a fact you own mirrors.”

Arven laughed, before nuzzling his nose against Doppio’s, before pulling him into a hug, just content to nuzzle him a bit. “No way I compete with you. Have you seen you? It’s like… like…”

Arven paused, trying to think of an apt comparison, before laughing softly. “This is gonna be a cliche, maybe, but it’s the most true thing. You look like if a flower just decided to stand up and be a person one day. Like… maybe an Anouska Roselily,” Arven compared, resting his forehead on Doppio’s shoulder, holding him in the hug as he leaned into him. “Like someone found the most beautiful anouska roselily on a hike one day, and loved it so much that it became bigger and bigger, until it was a full person, someone big enough to be able to carry all that love the person had for it.”

“...I know that’s not how it happened,” Arven said softly, “But I’m still glad you’re you. Big enough and here and able to hold all the feelings I have for you. I think it’d all overwhelm you, if you were a flower.”

Doppio made a happy little sound as Arven pulled him into a hug, and he tightened his arms around Arven’s waist to return it in kind, the two of them entwined and curled up together in the middle of that mystical little hideaway. He loved Arven’s hugs… That’s what he was like, to Doppio. As Arven searched for his own metaphor, Doppio already knew at least one.

If a hug was a person, it’d be Arven. Both as simple and as complex as that could be. 

But as Arven did find his comparison…well, a few thoughts went through Doppio’s head. If Arven had just picked that flower because they were pink. Some…half sardonic joke, about that really happening, if not for the fact Doppio couldn’t begin to imagine Boss ever going on a hike. Some general flustered feelings, just from Arven trying to express something like this. 

But what actually happened, out in the real world and not just in Doppio’s head?

A shudder went through Doppio’s body, something Arven would be able to feel, entwined as they were, and Doppio brought up a hand to cover his mouth. An odd, sort of croaking sound muffled by it, as Doppio curled more into his boyfriend. A small splash of something warm and wet against Arven’s neck. 

…and several dozen flowers in their little oasis seeming to bloom f̜̝͚͇̣͔͊͐͟͡r̩͇͉̣̠̤̀́̊̋̚o̟̯̤͊̌͛m̢̤͙̭͔͉̊́̀ͅ ̷͙̹͍̾͐̄̇͏̤n̤̝̱̈́̓͠o̜̳̫̍̎̅͘ͅţ̼͔̰̮̱͖͍͆͆̿̒h̸̴̨̳͗͂̚͟i͖͓̺̮͖̋͆̔͆͂̈n̵͇̠̩̅̃̔̊g̥̊̆̑̎̎͌̈̋͋́͘.̸̠̥̤͔̾̽̇͢͠ 

“...think it’s st-till overwhelming me, tesoro,” Doppio quietly sniffled, tears rolling down his cheeks as flowers continued to bloom, buds in wait for months getting their time to shine now. That peeling feeling getting mistaken for stomach flutters.

Arven smiled blankly, a small bead of sweat pooling at the edge of his temple.

…oh.

Huh.

Hm.

Arven, somewhat belatedly– the flowers growing magically around them had kinda distracted him– reached up to place his fingers against the wet spot on his neck. Scraping it a little, before inspecting his fingertips. It was clear. Oh. Doppio was crying. Huh. Okay.

“...” Arven blinked, looking at the blooming, growing flowers. Hesitantly, Arven reached over to touch a petal. It was soft and strong beneath his large, squared fingers. They felt too delicate for someone like him to touch, but he petted the petal anyway, marveling at how real it was. It had just sprouted. This wasn’t like Amaina’s illusions.

“.....Aceto,” Arven whispered, eyes sparkling a little, “I think you might be magic. Like… magic-magic.”

Amaina ruffled through the flowers, poking her head above the top of a particularly thick patch of it. Sneezing before blinking sweetly, an errant petal on her hair, as she looked up at Arven.

O.O

OoO Wow Little Senpai you are juuuuuuust catching on?? Way to be slow. Laaame.

OOO our boi magic as fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck

Doppio was just sniffling quietly for a moment, trying to get a hold of himself. He had just told Arven, but even truthfully overwhelming, it was a little embarrassing to just…be crying, ‘cause he told him he was…glad Doppio was alive, and able to receive his feelings. Whether Arven just let him have a moment, or try to move past, what he said next was…confusing, and enough that Doppio had to sit up out of their hug more, bashfully wiping his eyes and…

…

…

Okay, he was sure there hadn’t been this many. And with Arven and Amaina confirming it…

Pulling away from Arven more, Doppio looked around the small patch of flowers around them again, starting to scratch at his arm as a mildly distressed expression came over his face. 

“...it…really is me, then, isn’t it…”

“It’s incredible,” Arven said, not noticing Doppio’s distress. He was far too enraptured by what he was looking at. “Do you think it’s safe for me to pick one?”

Why not? They’re still just flowers. Just really faaaaaast

“Fast, huh?” Arven murmured, taking a nearby yellow flower, now tall and strong, and cutting its stem with his thumbnail. Bringing it up to his nose, he gave it a small sniff– it smelled fresh, but then, of course it would– before he laughed, admiring it as he spun it lightly in his fingers, looking at it from all angles. “Incredible.”

Doppio was usually…happy when people praised the things he did. But this…

Looking at the beautiful patch of flowers, Doppio felt sick. Bringing his knees up to his chest, he hunched over himself, half hiding his face before bringing his arms up to finish the job, this round of tears less joyful than the last. 

Arven, at least, noticed this. Glancing over at Doppio, at first too lost in his own wonder to recognize Doppio’s distaste. Frowning in concern, Arven wrapped an arm around Doppio’s shoulders, pulling him close as he whispered, “Hey… what’s wrong? Did it hurt?”

Doppio shook his head, before pausing…and finishing with a shrug. “...feels weird,” he sniffled, before trembling and curling more against Arven. “...I kept telling myself it wasn’t me… Why is…i-is everything just wrong with me?”

Arven gave Doppio an honestly baffled look. “Wrong with you? Aceto, you just… grew this,” Arven said, showing him the yellow plucked flower, looking over it with awe, “What’s wrong with this? What’s wrong with you?”

Arven smiled, a little sheepish as he admitted, “Maybe I’d feel differently about it if it were me. I’ll admit, I guess I can’t really understand what you’re going through… but I spent a year, hunting for magic. Because I can say whatever I want about the medical benefits of the Titan plant and how it boosts the immune system and all of that, but that’s all entirely me trying to rationalize what it really was. Because Aceto… it was magic. That’s the only way to really explain what I saw those plants do. Chief was dying. The fact that I got the first plant in time was purely a miracle. If I had been a few days later, he would have died. If I hadn’t found more, he would have died. But those plants… They brought him back to life. Healthy and as strong as when he was a newly grown puppy.”

“It was magic,” Arven whispered. “And I felt crazy for thinking it was… and then you showed up. And you brought a little, silly person with you, who makes fireworks burst over our heads because she’s excited and can smoosh flat when I slap her just because it’s funny. And you…” Arven looked around, at the flowers grown around them, and said, his voice still filled with awe, “You literally just made a garden grow around me. I can’t think of a more beautiful thing to just be able to… do. I’m… ha!” 

Arven laughed, before saying a little sheepishly, “I’m jealous. A little bit. This is… so incredible!”

It wasn’t that magic was…wrong, in itself. Doppio would never call Amaina wrong, and he was grateful that Arven had been able to save Chief, and…even if it was the herbs, Doppio still thought being able…wait. 

“...knowin’ ‘n being able to find the herbs ‘n all… Getting something special like that’s still incredible to me,” Doppio murmured, nudging his body against Arven’s. “Even if the herbs exist on their own, I-I don’t think most people would’ve been able to find them, so…that’s just you.”

It was still special. Arven was special. 

And Doppio…

He squeezed his eyes shut around another flood of tears. “...I think I did something to that CPS lady. And things get…weird, sometimes, li-like…like when you said, b-before that you knew exactly what Kaito was gonna say, that time, a…and…” A frightened little desperate breath left Doppio, strangled by his throat. “...I wanted it to stop… B-Boss probably never meant to h-hold me under so long b-but I kept…I kept skipping it…”

Arven blinked, giving Doppio a searching look… before his eye widened, as he murmured with new understanding, “You can manipulate time…”

Amaina, who had found a particularly big flower and was now contently sitting cross legged on the top of it said, OoO yeah? I’ve mentioned that i’m sure.

Arven squinted at her. “...no? You said he was like you.”

….okay fine i didn’t know specifically how he was doing it but I know me a magic baby when he power bursts all over me and boy does our guy BURST! Bursting all the time! And I knew our brains all jump and dance when he does.

O.O

OoO maybe all of reality too who knows 

Arven felt that insight hit him like a bag of bricks. Doppio can make… reality? Jump and dance? That’s… well, that’s… that’s a lot. But. But.

…no, that was just a lot. But it didn’t really matter. Not as much as how upset Doppio was about it, as Arven wrapped his arms around him, nuzzling in as he closed his eye. “I’d skip someone drowning me too, if that helps. I think anyone would… I only wish it would have made stopping it happening at all easier.”

Time…

Doppio had never tried to, like, sit down and conceptualize it before. As evidenced, he had just been trying to pretend it wasn’t happening. But looking straight at it? He was…doing stuff with time. The peeling feeling, the snapping feeling…probably that stiff, balloon-y feeling too…

Forward. Back. Stop. 

…skipping something he didn’t like. Preventing something catastrophic. …pure panic, probably…

“...’s so stupid,” Doppio groaned, tucking his head against Arven’s shoulder. “Just ‘cause I don’t…experience it happening real time doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen… Still had that huge bruise on my face for ages…”

“But you said you did something that made me remember something that didn’t happen. When I remembered Kaito saying something he hadn’t said,” Arven reasoned out, resting his head against Doppio’s, “So at least in some ways, you can stop experiencing something… sort of? I mean, I guess technically we… still sort of experienced it? Because I do remember it… sort of?”

Arven paused, rationalizing it out… before laughing lightly. “It’s kind of confusing, huh? So, it’s less morphing reality, and more morphing how we… perceive it? Though, maybe not, unless we’ve really been sitting here so long that all these flowers could grow in real time and we just skipped it.”

Arven looked at the flowers, before suddenly saying nervously, “Unless that’s exactly what happened? Which, hm. Kaito’s gonna be so pissed at us for disappearing again.”

“I don’t know,” Doppio groaned, though after a moment he huffed something that had some lightness to it. Something more than just his fear and confusion. “...think you would probably be the person to figure it out, one day, though… You’ve got a good head for understanding things.”

Giving the flowers a nervous side-eye, Doppio shuddered. “...I hope not. I…didn’t notice the sun moving, so…I think we’re still…in normal time? Um…I…I think I made water float, once, while everything else was the same, so…maybe it doesn’t…”

He trailed off, just…tired and upset, trying to think about…his weirdness any more deeply. 

“...Kaito said that I might have a, uh…skin sensitivity problem, when I asked him how to deal with the peeling and snapping.”

“Peeling and snapping?” Arven asked, not sure what Doppio was talking about, though considering the context-- “...is that what it feels like? When you do your magic?”

Doppio wrinkled his nose a little, feeling…weird, hearing someone say he did magic, but be nodded against Arven’s shoulder. “Like rubber bands snapping all over my body, or…like shitty tape being peeled off. Feels weird…”

“Sounds like your skin might be sensitive to magic, at best,” Arven mused, before looking to Amaina. “Angel?”

OoO Wha?

“Aren’t you trying to help Doppio with this stuff? Like, isn’t that why you hang out with him?” Arven asked. “What does the stretching mean?”

Okay first of all rude I hang out with Doppio because we are BESTIES but also yeah I sensed someone like me and was like let’s do a guy a solid.

“Right, so… so can you explain what’s happening?”

Amaina flew up, leaning in to inspect Doppio. She rubbed at her chin, looking him over, going hmmmm, and ah i see and yep yep…

Before she hugged his face, giving him little cheek kisses. I diagnose you with being a cutie-patootie~

Doppio huffed a small laugh and brought up a hand to gently hug Amaina back. “Thanks, Angelo.” 

He hadn’t really been expecting her to have an answer. Even as far in denial as he was, she hadn’t seemed to have any sort of insight whenever his…weirdness happened. She just…was there to sit back and enjoy the show. See something beautiful and new, as far as her own definitions for those things went. 

And while it didn’t feel…great, just…facing yet another way he was wrong… He wasn’t ungrateful for how amazed his friends seemed to think it was. Doppio didn’t think he’d be able to handle it, if he had to face it alone, or with Amaina and Arven being…disgusted or hateful. 

Wiping his face, Doppio tried to calm down a little…for however successful that could be, when he gave Arven an embarrassed look. “...um… Look, don’t laugh, but… That story-time Kaito was talking about… When I was on the ventilator, he was reading me The Adventures of Link, to pass the time, and, uh…he wanted to finish it, sometime…and I did too.”

Turning pink, Doppio looked away, explaining, “There was, um…this description in it? Of Link feeling…time as a physical force, I think it was… If what I feel is, uh, not what Kaito and I were talking about before, then…I think it might be something like that. Maybe.”

“Oh, huh…” Arven paused, nodded, paused again… before admitting, “I don’t know this story. Would it help me understand if I did?”

OoO He is the HERO OF TIIIIIME

“Right, that doesn’t clear anything up for me…”

I know! Amaina suddenly looked up at Doppio excitedly, before saying, I’ll do an entire retelling of the bits of the story you’ve heard already, in full visual, with musical interludes! And you can speed up time so that Arven witnesses my masterpiece retelling all at once! 

“...is that how it works?” Arven asked.

Doppio scratched at his arm, his eyebrows drawn tight with worry. “...I’m not sure… I always feel really disoriented after…a skip, I guess, but everyone else seems like…nothing happened, I guess. Though I’ve never asked… But I don’t know if I can do it on purpose like that, and…”

His lip caught between his teeth. “...I-I don’t want to accidentally hurt you. I don’t really know what this…does. And I think people will start to get freaked out again if we end up out here for hours.”

O.O

OoO BOOOOOOO DO MAGIC STORY TIME

Arven rolled his eyes, poking her in the head, ignoring her cry of outrage. “He doesn’t feel comfortable trying it, and frankly, if he’s not comfortable doing it to me, I’m not volunteering to be experimented on.”

Laaaaaaaaame

Something hardened in Doppio’s expression. “You’re not an experiment.”

But then he sighed, giving Arven a moderately embarrassed look. “...but, um…if you wanted to hear the whole story… I-if you wanted to, you could listen too? A-and we could ask Kaito to start from the beginning? To be honest, I don’t remember a ton from the start but…yanno. That’s kinda why I don’t read books in the first place.”

Arven wondered if it was really okay to just start talking about that. To just start making plans for ‘story time’. To slow down talk about something that seemed kinda monumental. It wasn’t every day your boyfriend could control time.

…but, well. In the same way that life had gone on after Amaina had shown up, and after finding out Doppio was a two year old, uh… ‘mind creature’ as Amaina had called him once, and to a much lesser extent, after Arven had found a plant that could basically bring his dog back to life…

Yeah. Life went on. 

“Sure,” Arven smiled, “Knowing that guy, he’d probably be enthusiastic to get a chance to do it again.”

Yay~ plus it’s gonna be a great chance to show you what you look like in a skin-tight blue suit. Spoiler alert: you got curves for daaaaaaays, booty-boi! 

“...what?”

Doppio nodded a bit. “He would… He said he wanted to try reading stories to his son, too, but that Timothy probably wouldn’t go for it unless Kaito made it like an event with Timothy’s friends too. …he got really into it, I think performance is something Kaito really likes.”

…and, well, Doppio had liked it too. 

For many reasons. 

Turning red, Doppio made a sputtering noise at Amaina. “Stai zitto!” (Shut up!)

Unable to look Arven in the eye, but certainly not wanting to look, uh, certain other places, Doppio’s gaze jittered as he waved his hands. “D-d-don’t worry about it, she’s just teasing, um, she, uh, made some jokes about us being some of the characters, just…uh…” 

He huffed, covering his face. “...sorry.”

Arven gave Doppio a bewildered look… before turning a little red. His ears burning particularly bright, as he looked away, scratching his stomach a little… before looking to Amaina. 

“....did Aceto get a cute outfit too?”

Amaina smirked. He wears tights and a shirt. I’ll show ya~

And Arven glanced over at Doppio… before making a small, high squeaking noise. Covering the side of his face as he looked away, blushing furiously as he said, “A-aceto, pull down your tunic a little!” Amaina musically cackling in the background.

Doppio made a high-pitched, steaming noise as he just…tried to bring all his limbs in closer to himself. “I-I’m not actually wearing anything! O-or a costume, I mean! A-angelo, cut it out!”

Still, Doppio leaned forward more, sitting on his side a little with his legs off to the side, hopefully, er, sitting in a way that a hypothetical tunic would be covering…everything.

…everything…

Doppio glanced down at himself, feeling…uncomfortable squirms throughout his stomach and chest as he tugged at his sweater, trying to cover his body more, even though he knew it was just an illusion, and there wasn’t actually a problem with his real clothes. 

“...can I still braid your hair?”

Arven frowned. Doppio being a little embarrassed was cute, but… he didn’t like the discomfort on his boyfriend’s face. It was too genuine. “Amaina, cut it out, he doesn’t like it.”

Amaina tilted her head, her expression blank… before she nodded. Okay, time to switch.

“Switch?” Arven asked, before catching sight of himself. Looking down at himself in open astonishment… before he screeched, “HOW DOES THIS COUNT AS CLOTHES!?”

YOU ARE ENTIRELY COVERED WHY IS EVERYONE MAD AT MEEEEE QoQ??

Arven took the yellow flower he had picked and batted Amaina in the head with it until the costume disappeared, ignoring her whining and false crying as Arven huffed, before giving Doppio an amused look. “Yeah? Still want to? Sure, do you need me to turn around for it?”

…switch…

Despite the courtesy that Arven had shown him, Doppio couldn’t help peeking out from between his fingers as Arven battled Amaina for his vestment-based virtue. If, when they climbed that giant tree, Arven’s pants had…really showed they fit well, then…the blue bodysuit really left nothing to the imagination. 

…man, Arven was strong… Buff. He had the sort of form that just screamed to Doppio, ‘powerful’. But a sort of functioning powerful--like Arven had pointed out before, he wasn’t starving or dehydrating himself for some creepy aesthetic. He was just healthy, and his body showed that care plainly. Another thing Arven poured love into, that Doppio just wanted to--

Doppio blinked, swallowing an, uh, embarrassingly full mouth as he realized Arven’s clothes were back and he had asked him a question. 

“Oh, uh…sure. I mean…” He tried for a smirk, though it came out a little shaky, “I could probably do it facing you, but it’d probably be better from the back.”

Amaina just smirked, looking far too pleased with herself, while Arven smiled, a little oblivious to why Doppio looked that flustered. “Alright, sure. Make me look pretty, Aceto.” 

With that last little laugh, Arven turned around, pushing all of his hair behind his back as he crossed his legs, before deciding he’d be more comfortable bringing his knees up to his chest, leaning against his legs.

Amaina, done with her teasing for now, decided she felt like dancing, as she often did. So she started hopping between the flowers in graceful, ballerina steps, spinning on the flower tops as music gently sang through the air. 

Arven hummed along with the music. Happy and content, the air smelling of flora. “...life is really nice, right now,” Arven noticed, a small smile tugging at his lips. “I know it's hard, but… I’m really happy, right now.”

Doppio snorted. “If that was the goal, then job done already. I’ll do my best for you, though.”

Shifting to sit cross-legged, not wanting to skew too much to any side and give Arven a sideways style, Doppio started gently carding his fingers through Arven’s hair, brushing it out as he thought about what style to try. He did have a few extra hairbands on him, so they weren’t solely relying on his scrunchie, so…

…Arven’s hair was really nice… Soft and…almost feathery, for how fluffy it was as the curls sprung back up against his fingers. The two colors were super cool too, as always. Hmmm… Maybe Doppio could do something with that…

“...I’m happy too,” Doppio said quietly, his eyes laser focused as he gently started pulling sections of Arven’s hair around for a sort of…loose fishtail braid that went from the left side of his head down to the lower right. Hopefully, if Doppio did it right, changing colors in thick sections as it went down. “...not about a lot of stuff, but…right now? And in moments like this…I am. I’m happy being here with you, Arven.”

He laughed quietly. “...I know I got kinda caught up earlier, but…I’m glad I’m alive too. That I got the chance to meet you. If there’s…any reason why I’m alive? Being here with you is a good one, I think.”

“Hee~” Arven keened, as he relaxed in the feeling of Doppio running his fingers through his hair. He felt his nerves relax, for as few of them as there already were. He had to stop himself from letting his chin fall on top of his knees, trying to be still so that he wouldn’t ruin Doppio’s work. But mmmmm… he could fall asleep like this, if he wasn’t careful. 

He felt warm and happy. As frustrating as everything had been lately… in all truth? Arven’s life had been getting notably better, since all of this had started. Entirely because of Doppio, of course, but also just…

“I’ve never had a big, like, family dinner like that before,” Arven admitted, closing his eyes as he smiled into his hands, “...it was nice, getting to do that with you.”

Doppio smiled softly as he worked, ever careful not to snag anything. …it hurt, having your hair pulled. Not the worst pain ever, sure, but… Well, he liked those happy sounds Arven was making. He wanted to be the cause of more. 

He was more than what people needed, and…and his life was for more than other people’s convenience. 

…but Doppio really did like making other people happy. Arven most of all. 

“It was,” Doppio hummed quietly, gently parting some hair. “...I cooked for Boss all the time, and we did eat together a lot, but… It’s different, with so many people. I still get a little nervous around Kaito’s family, but…it was nice. And I’m glad you liked it too. …it’d be fun to do something like it again, I think.”

“I think so, yeah.” Arven hummed, “They’re weird, but… I don’t know. I don’t know. I really can’t stand all of this sometimes, and I think Kaito might be high-key crazy, sometimes. Like, maybe actually out of his mind, in some ways… but…”

Arven closed his eyes. “...I don’t know… it feels nice. Sometimes. Like a… nice kind of suffocating, if that makes any sense.”

“I don’t always hate it,” Arven said softly, “...though don’t tell anyone that. That’s a secret between us.”

Doppio paused, just looking at the back of Arven’s head for a moment before he nodded. Then, realizing that Arven couldn’t see him, he leaned forward and placed a soft kiss on Arven’s left ear. “I won’t, promise.”

Starting to braid again, Doppio chewed on his lip for a moment before sighing softly. His tone unsure. “...Kaito said that…there wasn’t anything wrong with me, for wanting a dad out of Boss. That…that when there was only one other person in my world, then…that just…made sense. That I’d feel like that.”

Gently, Doppio stroked his thumb down Arven’s nape, now that his hands were getting closer to it. “...I think…having a good parent might feel really good. And…that it might be normal to want that.”

He sighed. “They’re not our parents, but…it’s kinda useless pretending that they don’t care. And that’s kinda nice, sometimes. …yeah?”

Arven chuckled a little, his ears warming into a small inferno at the little kiss. “They are not our parents, no. Honestly, as much as Kaito wants to pretend, somehow I don’t think he’d talk about half the things he talks about around us if he really thought of us as his kids. At least, I hope not, otherwise Tim and Miyako are going to grow up knowing way too much about his sex life. Do you remember that health card he showed off to Lake? I got a peek of those tallies. There were more tallies than space behind the card. Some of those have to be fakes, or repeats, or something, no way that many people would subject themselves to that weirdo for a night.”

“...Kokichi is nice though,” Arven pointed out, “He was really nice to you during dinner, when you lost your memory, which I appreciate.”

“He did say, uh… Um, basically that he has an awful kid-filter, but he immediately refused to even allude to anything sex-based in front of Tim before.” Scoffing a little, Doppio rolled his eyes as he started to work down to the looser parts of Arven’s hair, though…aw. That was cute… He hadn’t noticed that Arven’s hair was layered like that… With the asymmetrical braid, it wasn’t just Arven’s bangs that were left loose, he also had some longer bits that framed around his cheeks… 

…wow how did someone get so pretty??? All of the damn high school must be nursing a broken heart for how many of them Arven must’ve had to turn down. 

Though, Doppio just sighed a bit as he pulled his brain back into the conversation. “...he is nice… I know! I-I know I should just…accept that by now? But it still weirds me out… I feel like I have no idea what to say to him, which just makes me feel worse when it’s obvious he’s trying to make conversation…”

Doppio sighed again, tapping his forehead against the back of Arven’s head. “...that was so embarrassing…”

Arven glanced over his shoulder, before laughing lightly, “Don’t be embarrassed. I think that’s just the mortifying ordeal of being around other people while still dealing with your memory stuff. It’s nothing new, it’s just… well, you had a bunch of people around to be worried about you. And, as your boyfriend? I prefer that, to you passing out in streets as people just gawk at you.”

“And it’s not just you intimidated by Kokichi. He’s kind of a big deal, in case you forgo… oh, wait,” Arven resisted the urge to tilt his head, “You literally have only been alive for a few years. You might not know. Prince Kokichi’s got a whole presence in Dicea. You see drawings of him as a baby and a toddler and a little kid in our history books, in places you wouldn’t expect to see him. In old voyage posters and farming competitions and PSA handouts about the dangers of propaganda, which one of my teachers thought was useful, but very funny. He’s everywhere.”

“And, well…” Arven shrugged a little, “He was the focus point of one of the biggest insurrection attempts in the last hundred or so years? Did you ever hear of the LRG? The Lineage Resistance Group? They basically tried to take over the country, in protest to Prince Kokichi’s… existence. People died. The Queen was killed… It's a lot, for a person to carry with them. I think Kokichi is impressive, to handle it. The weight of it all.”

Doppio groaned a sort of uneasy, “Mmmm”, carefully weaving in some of the lower layers of Arven’s hair into the braid. It did make things harder to figure out, if he noticed he had a lapse at all, but that was exactly why, for Doppio, the best case scenario of his brain fizzing out on him happened when he was alone. No people gawking, no concerning witnesses, no…careful concerned looks as people stared…

…but the latter was…probably safer, if Doppio really had to split hairs. And without his usual safety net…he needed that. 

…and Arven preferring it was a plus. 

At first, Doppio let out a soft huff. He knew the literal heir apparent of their country was a big deal, he may only be like…18 months old or something, but he hadn’t been living under a rock for that time. But, uh, the stuff that Arven actually pointed out…

“What??” Doppio asked softly, baffled by the thought that… His baby pictures?? Was that just normal for the heirs? Sure, he wasn’t a history buff in general, but…that was weird. 

…as weird as trying to kill someone for…being alive. 

Doppio frowned, his fingers slowing as he started to get to the end of the braid. “...I…think I have heard of that group, but… That’s awful… I thought political movements were just supposed to be about…economic and power structures. Not about…someone just being alive.”

…Kaito was always talking about how incredible his husband was. How strong Kokichi was. …how Kokichi could just…choose to change and do it. 

Doppio never thought he wasn’t, but… Boss was right, to have been so apprehensive of their heir, Doppio was starting to think. Just not in the ways he had expected.

Arven hummed a little. “It is. I’m pretty glad I wasn’t alive back then, obviously. The way my teachers talk about it, it’s like everyone lost their mind, and there was just this, you know, baby sat in the middle of it. Doing baby things while all the adults around it lost it.”

“...maybe that’s why they’re so weird?” Arven asked, blinking at the flowers at his feet, “That whole group, I mean? Maybe they’re just too used to everyone else being crazy. So they, like… act crazy in the opposite way. Does that make any sense? Maybe not.”

Peeking over his shoulder, Arven smiled. “Is it done? Am I beautiful?”

That seemed a little ridiculous…but, well. Boss had mentioned more than a few times how susceptible people were to doing ridiculous things. With the right incentive, anything could happen with a scarily large backing. 

“Maybe…” Doppio hummed. “That would explain at least some stuff, I think…”

Considering, like Doppio’s hair, Arven’s hair was thick enough that it wasn’t just a tiny nub at the bottom, Doppio wrapped his scrunchie around the end of the braid, snorting and leaning forward to both block Arven’s view and to sneakily plant a kiss on his cheek. “You’ve already been this whole time, you know. But yeah, I’m done.”

Moving the braid over Arven’s right shoulder, Doppio shuffled over on his knees to face Arven properly again, giving him a sheepish, yet hopeful look. “Um…I’ve only tried this kind of braid a few times, but…I thought it would be nice… Do you like it?”

Arven had a lot of hair. So it wasn’t hard to pull his braid over and look at it… “Oh, wow! Look at what you did with the coloring, that’s so neat!”

O.O

OoO MIRRORS

Arven startled when suddenly all the leaves in the bush around them, along with the petals of the flowers, all became reflective glass surfaces. Arven looked at the bushes, before hesitantly reaching out to touch one. It still felt like leaves, and moved like leaves, but the individual angles of each little leaf acting as a mirror was undeniable, and the light even bounced off them in a realistic way and…

“You’re a little intimidating sometimes, little angel,” Arven said, as he peered at the reflective images of himself, showing not only his front, but easily behind him as well as the images bounced off of each other. Able to see himself at every angle.

OvO I know

OoO but you look soooooo preeeeeettyyyyyyyyy AHHHHHHH SO CUTE

Arven grinned, nodding. “It does! Maybe not something I could personally keep up with, but I like it, it looks great. Thanks, Aceto!” Arven said, reaching around to give Doppio a hug, and then a little kiss.

…then another kiss.

Doppio was pretty great to kiss.

Doppio grinned a bit, starting to feel that warmth of pride as Arven, well, seemed to like his work. …probably did like it, Arven really had no reason to lie to him, and that’d just be kind of shitty. A-and it was a nice braid! So…

Jumping as everything around them suddenly became reflective, Doppio…got a little uncomfortable as his reflection was there too…

But Arven? Who’d bother looking at Doppio when Arven was there?

Tucking his still loose hair behind an ear, Doppio gave his boyfriend a smile. “My pleasure, tesoro. Your regular style really is great…but if you ever wanted, I’d never mind doing your hair. Just, uh…so you know.”

…but there were certain things that Doppio liked spending his time doing even more. And getting back to the ‘couple things’ that they’d paused from was definitely one of them. 

Smiling peacefully and feeling content, Doppio pressed his lips to Arven’s for a third time, gently cupping his jaw.

Around them, the leaves turned back to normal, and so did the flowers, and Amaina was gone.

She only liked to play at being a pervert, after all. She’d leave the boys to have their fun.

-

Kaito kissed at Shuichi’s knee again, smiling into his skin when he listened to Shuichi laugh lightly. “Kaito…”

“Mm?” Kaito hummed, rubbing his hand down Shuichi’s thigh, placing another small kiss against Shuichi’s knee, “Something on your mind, handsome?”

“No, but something’s on yours.” Shuichi sighed, adjusting against the bedframe, resting his book on his collarbone as Kaito continued to kiss and fondle at his leg. “You’re riled up, hm?”

“Nooooo~” Kaito cooed at him, kissing at his leg, back up to his knee in small, warm patterns… before grinning up at Shuichi as he bit his knee a little, pinching the skin before giving it a small lick, winking. “What makes you think that?”

“I have no idea,” Shuichi smirked lightly… before gently nodding his head towards the crib, “But we can’t.”

“We coooould though,” Kaito whined, pressing his forehead into Shuichi’s leg, peeking up at Shuichi with a somewhat desperate, hang-dog look. “We so could, it’d be quick, she’d be fiiiiine~”

Shuichi raised an eyebrow… before tilting his head a little. “You remember when you and Kokichi were supposed to be watching me, and I woke up alone and Hajime found me and had to take care of me, and I made a fool of myself down in the dining hall?”

Kaito winced. “Yeah.”

“Somehow I can imagine now exactly how that happened.”

Kaito sighed, flopping onto his side on the bed, lust still clear in his eyes, but the reproach reining him back a bit. “Yeah… I’m sorry…”

“Mm,” Shuichi hummed, watching Kaito… before raising his eyebrow again as Kaito’s hand slooooowly slunk over to Shuichi’s ankle. “You really seem to be wallowing in your guilt there.”

Kaito grinned, wrapping his hand around Shuichi’s ankle and pulling it in, placing little kisses against it. “I am sorry I did that. But… my dumb, stupid, endless libido is something you like about me, right?”

Shuichi seemed to consider Kaito for a bit, before frowning as Kaito kissed at his feet a little. “... I do, you know.”

Kaito paused, hearing the weight in Shuichi’s tone. Resting his head against Kokichi’s ankle, Kaito rubbed his thumb up and down his leg, looking up at him. “...Yeah? I know.”

“I love all of you.”

Kaito grinned, face flushing slightly. “Yeah? I know?”

“Do you?”

Kaito laughed, sitting up and crawling over to him, giving him a quick kiss. “Yes? Shuichi, what’s the matter, handsome? Did I seem doubtful?”

“It’s just, you do have a high libido, and mine has cooled down a lot–”

“Makes you more fun to chase~” Kaito grinned, kissing Shuichi some more. “I don’t think you dislike me chasing you. In fact, I’m damn sure you love it.”

“But you doubt it sometimes,” Shuichi pointed out, “I’ve seen you break down over the idea.”

Kaito scoffed, laying against Shuichi, resting his head on his shoulder, ignoring how Shuichi had to move his book aside to make room for his suddenly cuddly husband. “What else is new? I break down over everything. When I’m clear headed and calm, I know you love all of me.”

“Dr. Mariah literally has wanted to throttle me for downplaying your breakdowns. I see her tiny little child hands start to squeeze that book of hers and I just know she’s picturing my neck.”

“You and our therapist’s weird aggression towards each other does not go that far, handsome.” Kaito scoffed, “And if you’re supposed to trust that when I’m upset there’s a reason, trust when I’m happy that there’s a reason too? You like that I adore you, and want to touch you. I know you do. And thankfully for both of us, I like to flirt and chase and adore. It works out really well.”

“Well, as long as you know…” Shuichi sighed, reaching up to pet Kaito’s hair a little, “I just don’t want you to think I’m rejecting you.”

“Mmm… real easy way to not reject me is to follow me into the closet–”

“No.”

“Fine.” Kaito huffed, closing his eyes, enjoying the fingers through his hair. “...we’re also both lucky that I think a little bit of jealousy is sexy.”

Shuichi narrowed his eyes at Kaito. “Why would I be jealous?”

“Because you’re gonna banish me to my shrine soon, and that means I’m gonna have to comfort myself with allllll the pretty naked people waiting for me there~” Kaito grinned into Shuichi’s side, “Poor me~”

“...what?”

-

“Okaaaaay, Miyaaaaa~” Kaito whispered, setting up her little sitting pillow in the corner of the table, opposite of his new clam fishtank, Miyako yawning as he set her up. “Ready for your first Pudiciam? Now, you’ve only made one prayer to Atua, but your tummy times have been getting stronger, so it’s good to show gratitude, okay? I mean, he didn’t actually do anything, but. Buuuuuut…”

Kaito paused, pulling up the cleaning supplies– he didn’t need much this time– as he tried to think of how to explain it to her. “...well, okay, for one, he might actually be hearing our prayers. Like, not to brag, baby girl, but when it comes to Atua? You and I are special. We’re his chosen, and while he loves everyone, of course… Well, it’s kinda like with Daddy. Everyone matters to him, and he’ll always keep everyone in mind… buuuuut–”

Kaito grinned, leaning over to Miyako and placing a small little kiss against her forehead, which Miyako blinked sleepily at. “He’s always gonna love us just a little bit more. If you ever hear anything otherwise? That’s just lip service, to someone else, or maybe even to Daddy sometimes. Atua’s the same way. He loves everyone, but ya know… we have a special place.” 

“...I hope,” Kaito admitted softly, setting up the pillow and kneeling in front of the offering bowl, rubbing the back of his neck a tad sheepishly,  “I mean, the guy’s never, uh, probably spoken to me to confirm it. Gal? That’s another thing, Miyako, apparently Atua’s visage is… fluid? You’re gonna hear Dad call him ‘him’, but that’s just my habit, little love, you can call him whatever. But! Even if Dad and Atua haven’t talked, there is a looooooot of evidence… or well, theory, that Dad might have been custom made by him.” 

Kaito grinned, imagining Miyako’s little lip smacks were gasps of surprise, as he nodded enthusiastically. “Yep! Didn’t know your ol’ dad was such a big deal, huh? Yep, it’s very possible I was literally made to love your daddy and dada, and maybe Auntie Maki too… like I was a force pulling everyone in. And, sure, there’s, eeeeeeh, some bad implications in that idea… but! I’ve decided to be proud of it! And I want you to be proud of it too, Miya!”

Kaito glanced over his shoulder, checking the door, before leaning in to whisper to her, “Because Dad has a theory about why… and if you have a destiny, little love? I want you to be proud of it too. My Miyako is always the most specialist little girl in the world to me, you’re the most important duty I have, and I love every second of it. But it can be a little intimidating, and scary, finding out you’re special to everyone else too. Honestly, Daddy will probably be able to help you with that feeling more than I can… but what I want to make certain is that when Kokichi reminds you that at the end of the day, you’re just little Miya and little Miya is, at her core, a normal, friendly, lovely little girl… when you can’t be normal? And life makes you so much bigger than you are in reality? Is that Miyako is wonderful, even if she’s different. Being destined and wonderful and powerful does not make you wrong, or monstrous, or ‘other’, okay? You were special from the start, because you were incredibly special to Dad.”

Rubbing her toes a little, watching her eyes drowsily close again, Kaito whispered, “I’ll be the first big, important, impactful effect you’ll have on someone. So when you start impacting the world? You won’t be new to it. It’s just gonna be a bigger world than your dad. You can make all your mistakes on me, okay? I don’t mind a thousand bells, or whatever else Miyako’s gonna come with. I’ll show you that you can trust yourself.”

“And that starts with, well… stuff like this!” Kaito laughed, leaning back and looking at the altar, a tight, somewhat wary look on his face as he said to the bowl, “Trusting the freak that put us into this mess in the first place! And trusting he’s listening! So… alright.”

Bowing to the bowl, Kaito took a long breath… before murmuring, “Atua, who better damn well love me… I prayed for–”

-

For how crazy the past week and change was, the weekend had been suspiciously low key, in Doppio’s eyes. He and Arven had just…well, rested, like all the adults had been continually telling them to. Not staying completely bedridden, of course, they had put in a good effort to map out the whole damn Usott Castle just wandering around. Doppio finally got to see the greenhouse himself, they both checked out Prince Kokichi’s mom’s observatory, Doppio had showed Arven the basement lounge, and they took many, many walks out in the gardens, finding garden snakes and rabbits and friendly stray cats and passing birds and…

It had been nice. 

…even if Doppio hadn’t heard a single thing about his case. About Boss. Not if CPS or the Guardforce had actually made contact with him, not if he’d been taken to court, not if…if Boss had left. And while his days with Arven (and Chief and Amaina) were great…Doppio could only feel increasingly anxious about the situation. 

But as it always did, life went on. And before they knew it, it was Monday, and Doppio had a plan for Monday. 

Bright and early, Doppio smiled softly, waking up in Arven’s full-body grip as he had the past few days as well, and carefully extricated himself, starting to get ready. He had a breakfast to prepare, for Arven’s return to school.

Arven grumbled in his sleep when his full body pillow pulled away from him, his sleepy grip reluctantly letting go, though he made small little clawing grasps at the sheets before huffing in defeat, curling back up and falling back to sleep.

…until he sniffed. Sniffed again. Peeking his eyes open, blinking blearily at the tray in front of him… before shuffling up, still half asleep as he reached for the food, a slice of ham in his mouth before the first thought in his head flashed to light, as he said with his mouth full of food, “b’wefest?”

(AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA how was he so cute!?!?!?!)

Doppio chuckled softly, curled up in one of the armchairs--though he’d turned it back to face the bed--, his own breakfast in his lap. “Breakfast. Don’t worry, you still have plenty of time before we should start heading out--I just…wanted to make you something special.”

He shrugged, flushed lightly. “I know it’s not really…an event or anything, but…going back to school is still a change, right? Worthy of a good breakfast to bolster, I think… Give you energy to deal with the madhouse, at least.”

Arven scratched his head a little, his hair a little wild in the morning, before finally some of the sleep left his brain as he yaaaaaaawned… before immediately putting more food into his mouth. “....mmmm~”

And then he reached out, put his arms around Doppio’s waist, and flopped backwards onto the bed with him. “Mmmmmmmm no school. Only laying around with my cute boyfriend who made me breakfast in bed. And kisses. Breakfast, Aceto, and kisses. That’s my day,” Arven decided, yawning before placing little kisses against Aceto’s cheeks, “Mmmmmmm ‘s gonna be a good day~”

Doppio had just been admiring Arven as he woke up, so he was a second late realizing what his boyfriend was doing, and it was a flurry of panic (and wobbly, panicked noises) as Doppio scrambled to lift his plate out of his lap and set it on the nightstand…which left him vulnerable to knocking his knees against the bedtray Arven’s breakfast was on, but…it didn’t fall over, so Doppio was calling it a win!

Even more with the cuddles and kisses that awaited him. 

Giggling, Doppio couldn’t resist placing kisses against Arven’s cheeks as well, getting in on the cuddling action…though he gave a little hum as he grinned at his boyfriend. “Only that? I guess I can’t complain… I guess we’ll make it to that cafe another day…eventually…one day. Hmm…~ I’ll have to come up with a good afternoon snack myself then. Wonder what could live up to the promise of honey-brick toast…?”

Arven blinked… before groaning, “Riiiiiight. The cafe. Shoot, if I skip school, no cafe, huh…. Ugh. Noooooooo. Gah… fine. I’ll go to school. But only because you deserve cafe trip. I hope you appreciate my sacrifices.”

“Also,” Arven sighed, sitting up and reaching for his food again– it was delicious and best hot and he was going to enjoy every bite of it– as he saw Chief cheerfully eating from his own food bowl, Doppio having already given him breakfast that morning, “Pretty sure if I tried to skip, Kaito would literally drag me there by the ankles. I think I’ve made too many ‘I’m gonna skip’ jokes this weekend to pull a fast one on him; at one point he threatened to walk me to my first period desk and I don’t think he was kidding.”

Arven took a bite out of his pancakes… and practically melted. “Aceto… how? It’s so fluffy…”

“I do,” Doppio hummed softly, kissing Arven’s cheek. He wouldn’t actually insist on Arven going to school, but…despite it being something Arven himself walked away from, Doppio still felt…bad. Pulling Arven away from school all last week, basically. It may not be a sacrifice Arven found all that difficult, but it was just one among many sacrifices that Doppio was grateful Arven had given up for him. 

A good breakfast and mild encouragement to continue his education was…barely anything, but slowly, Doppio would take care of Arven too. 

…also. He had his first therapy appointment that day and…Doppio didn’t think he wanted to miss it. Even for snuggling in bed with Arven. 

“I wouldn’t put it past him,” Doppio sighed, reaching over to get his plate again, now that it seemed a little safer. “He’d probably threaten to be all overbearing about it too, wishing you a good day and hugging you ‘n stuff.”

As Arven swooned over the pancakes, Doppio chuckled smugly, looking down with a proud smile and red cheeks. “I whipped the egg whites separately to soft peaks, then folded them back in the batter. I’ve been interested trying to make souffle pancakes too sometime, which are supposed to be even fluffier than this method. I feel like it’d be like eating a cloud.”

“Amazing,” Arven said, shaking his head a little before eating again, moaning softly at the next bite, “So good, what the hell.”

Chief, having finished his food, clumped over to Arven, before putting his big dog face on the edge of the bed. Whimpering pathetically as he watched Arven eat. Arven gave a little breathy laugh, shaking his head. “Nuh uh, you’re not fooling me, ol’ man. I literally just watched you eat, this is my food. No begging.”

Chief was undeterred. He let out another little whimper, eyes wide and pathetic. Treats. More treats. He could smell what Arven was eating. Share. Treats?

Doppio just grinned more to himself, feeling warm inside. 

…it was nice. Sure, Boss had always been appreciative of his food (for the time it had actually been worth appreciation) but…he didn’t know. The extent to which Arven just…expressed his enjoyment? Doppio guessed? It felt like way too much most of the time, but at the same time…it was nice. It made Doppio feel good, like his food was that much better. Like…he’d really made someone happy with it. 

Even more when someone was whimpering and sighing just for a taste. 

“...gaaaaaaaaah,” Doppio groaned softly, covering his face, before taking one of the banana slices from his plate and offering it to Chief, his will much weaker than Arven’s learned resistance when it came to puppy-dog eyes. “Sorry, Chief…”

“You’re just digging yourself deeper into a hole, Aceto,” Arven warned, though that warning was tinged with amusement.

Chief, happily, gobbled up the banana slice, licking his lips and smacking them open and closed, his tail wagging happily… before he rested his head on the bed now towards Doppio. Staring at him pathetically, whining deep in his throat. Treats? More treat. You have more treats. Share? 

“Big ol’ jerk dog,” Arven huffed, reaching over to roughly scratch Chief’s head, pushing some of his fur in front of Chief’s eyes in defense of his boyfriend, “Stop taking advantage of Aceto.”

He wasn’t sure what brought it to mind, but Arven’s face suddenly lit up with recollection. “Oh! Your therapy is today, right? You ready for that?”

“I knoooooow,” Doppio groaned through a sigh, meeting Chief’s pathetic gaze with one of his own. “I can’t help it, though… He loves treats so much! And he gets so happy… I can’t not make a dog happy, Arven, it’s a crime.”

…not that he was particularly concerned with not committing crimes, or…at least he hadn’t been, but…this was a crime he couldn’t commit! 

But, thankfully, Arven came to his rescue, and Doppio was able to return to his breakfast, digging into fluffy, syrup drizzled pancakes. For one bite, at least. Doppio nodded gently as he swallowed. “I guess I am. I’m not…really sure what I wanna talk about, but I wrote stuff down in my notebook so I wouldn’t forget and…I dunno. Mariah’s nice, if a little intimidating, so either way, I’ll be okay. I’m just…”

Doppio sighed, looking up at the opposite wall as he blew air into his bangs. “...I’m kinda just hoping I can get to a point where I’m not…freaking out all the time. Kaito kinda said to, basically, not hold my breath on that, but…won’t get to that point if I’m not trying, I guess.”

“Okay, okay, but, I’d like to point out,” Arven said, literally pointing to Doppio, his brow furrowing a little, “And this is something I think you should bring up with her, because she might be able to do something about it… you always end up having your panic attacks with Kaito. Have you noticed that? Because I was thinking about that last night, this guy inspires attacks in you like nothing else. That can’t be a coincidence, or a good thing. Maybe she can figure out what he’s doing wrong with you.”

Doppio looked mildly alarmed at the pointed finger, before he blinked, blinked again, and his eyes widened in realization. Pulling out his notebook, Doppio made a note before humming a little stressed sound. “I hadn’t noticed but…you’re right. He…he does help me through them, but…honestly I’d rather not have them in the first place.”

…he didn’t think the bad mornings counted, really. That first time he was on his knees in the park, struggling to breathe, was…way more than what the bad mornings ever looked like. Sure, he couldn’t’ve led, like, a yoga class or anything, but Doppio hadn’t been straight out unable to breathe during them before. So…the times with Kaito were something different. Something worse, if he could say so. 

“I think she, uh…” Doppio narrowed his eyes, trying to remember and to word his thoughts correctly. “...already noticed some of the issues I have with Kaito? And wanted us to discuss them? It was something she, like, specifically pointed out, while I was just kinda listing off stuff I’d wanna talk about in therapy. Oh…”

Doppio blinked before giving Arven a concerned look. “Um…she said that being a target was something, like…worth talking about in a therapy way. Do…you think that’s something you’d wanna talk about with someone?”

“Nah, I don’t know what I’d even talk about with a therapist,” Arven said dismissively, finishing up his ham. “I’m honestly not that much of a talker. I just like talking to you, but when you’re not around? I get pretty quiet. I like observing others more than I like being observed.”

“But, admittedly,” Arven smirked, already proud of himself for thinking of this as he nudged Doppio a little, “You make people watching a little boring, now. After all, how can anyone else compare to you? I find myself wanting to look at you all day.”

There was a sudden knock at the door. “Hey, it’s morning! Wake up, you two, breakfast and then a fun, full day of being responsible! Wake up!”

Doppio nodded, accepting that easily, though he did press his shoulder affectionately to Arven’s. “Just thought I should ask, but…if you feel okay? Then I’m happy for that. I know I’m a horrible example of…dealing with everything, but… Well. If you feel like you’re handling it, then good.”

Arven…uh, had had a few moments of not ‘handling it’, Doppio knew, but…well, it had all been really stressful! And just because Arven had had a few moments didn’t mean he wasn’t handling it well on the whole. If just needing a hug and a talk from Lake was enough for Arven, then Doppio was glad his boyfriend wasn’t struggling. 

Actually doing quite a bit better than ‘not struggling’, at least in some moments. 

Flushing, Doppio bashfully looked away with a low giggle at the flattery, though he could only sigh at the knock on the door. Of course. Scooting out of bed, Doppio went to answer the door, only opening it a crack to save Arven’s still-in-bed privacy. He glowered at their unneeded alarm clock, giving a dry expression. “We’re already up, no need to wake the whole hall.”

Kaito grinned brightly down at Doppio, immediately reaching forward to ruffle his hair affectionately. “Look at you! Bright eyed and bushy-tailed! Hell yeah! Maybe I should have dragged you out into a run with me this morning? You’re a lean little thing, we could stand to bulk you up a bit!”

“Leave Aceto alone, Kaito!” Arven called from the bed.

“Are you up, Arven!? Come on, up, up, we have school!” Kaito called over Doppio’s head, clapping his hands, “Up and at’em, it’s time to go get you educated!”

Huffing, Doppio tried to fix his hair--first thing in the morning, and already mussed--before he stuck his tongue out at Kaito. “No thanks. I had stuff to do, and I have no interest in running with you. Plus, running doesn’t even bulk? Not that that’s what I want anyway.”

Glowering more at Kaito, Doppio pulled the door more firmly to only have himself in it. “There’s still plenty of time before Arven’s block starts, don’t rush him for no reason, you weirdo.”

Kaito chuckled, leaning his hand on his hip, openly amused. “Sure, sure, you’ve got me there. So what I’m hearing is you want weights. How much do you think you can lift, kid? I bet it’s more than you look, you’ve got the mentality for it, I think. What do you think, we could get you strong enough to lift Arven–”

Arven walked up behind Doppio, wrapped an arm around his waist, picked him up– not much, but enough to let Doppio’s toes graze on the ground– and pulled him from the door as, sticking his tongue out at Kaito, he slammed the door. “We’re eating breakfast! Aceto spent all morning on it, let us eat!”

Kaito glared at the closed door, his temple throbbing a little. Oh, the sass. Before gritting his teeth into a grin. “You’re not getting out of school today, Arven!”

“Who’s trying!?” Arven shouted, “We’ll come out when we’re ready!”

Doppio just leveled a wholly unimpressed expression on Kaito as he went off, talking about nonsense. Doppio didn’t want to bulk up. What, did Kaito think he wanted to look like him? Ugh, no way. 

(...sure, he didn’t think his body was all that attractive as he was, but…well. It was a body and it served him well enough, and…Arven seemed to like it. So Doppio was happy with it.)

Just as he was getting ready to tell Kaito off--he was trying to think of a way that pointing out that he could already lift Arven would shut Kaito up and not spark another tangent--but, uh…

Uh…

With a squeak, Doppio went scarlet as he felt warm, firm arms around his waist and his feet (mostly) leave the ground, his brain going into static until well after the door was closed and Arven had gotten the last word. 

Oh… Arven really could pick him up… Oh.

Uselessly opening his mouth a few times, Doppio cleared his throat, looking away with a flustered expression. “...we really should finish up breakfast soon, though…”

Arven lit up a little at Doppio’s flustered expression, puffing his chest proudly a bit. Yeah, he could be impressive to his boyfriend sometimes! But, he wanted to go back and finish Doppio’s impressive feat himself, as he gave him a small peck on the cheek. “Let’s do it. I want to finish my pancakes, I’ve been taking my time with them because I’m gonna be so sad when I– Chief! No! Bad dog!”

Chief licked his lips contently. Arven’s last slice of ham gone. Treats~

-

Kaito had wished Timothy a good day at school first, them dropping the 10-year-old off first. He had smiled warmly and patted Tim on the shoulder and said hi to two little girls who had seemed happy to see him, and it had all been so normal and calm that Arven had dared let himself think that his own drop off was going to be as calm and unobtrusive. 

No. Not even close. Kaito, at some point, had decided that not only was he going to escort Arven to class himself, but Doppio was coming too, as Kaito made no secret of trying to hype up the school experience. “Eyyyyyy, general studies, right!? Everyone in here doing their homework absolute last second!? Or maybe they got things done ahead of time so they can chat, hm?” Kaito grinned, looking at the slightly bewildered professor, while the class quieted down, a mixture of incredulous and curious throughout the students. “Arven, show Doppio your desk while I talk to your teacher!”

“Why are you talking… ugh,” Arven scoffed, rolling his eyes, adjusting his backpack as he gave Doppio a ‘can you believe this look’, “I’m not gonna argue with him in front of everyone.”

Doppio was a fragile second from just up and covering his blazing face, and was currently settling for shrinking into his sweater collar and staring at the ground, trying to avoid being noticed by…everyone and everything. The world. The universe. 

…especially a few of those kids he…vaguely recognized in the split second he’d had his gaze up. Nng.

So he just…silently, embarrassedly shuffled after Arven, not seeing an opportunity to leave without Kaito pulling him back in in a chokehold. 

“Hey, hey Arven,” Minnie called, tipping her chair back as they passed by. “Is the prince going to escort you everyday now? And who’s this? Oh! Are you that guy that--”

“Minnie,” Nela sighed, the bags under her eyes more apparent today, along with the fatigue in her voice. 

Doppio just shrank more under the increased eyes on them. 

“I think if the prince keeps trying to walk me around, I’m gonna push him into a puddle,” Arven said plainly, heading to a back desk near the window, before looking at it for a moment… before shrugging helplessly at Doppio. “Ta-da?”

As Arven started unpacking his things onto the desk, Kaito whispered to the professor, “Okay, I know the guards have already talked to you, but I really wanted to reinforce this: if you see anything unusual, you need to report it to the closest guard or the dean. That includes anything weird with Arven himself. If he seems off, or nervous? Don’t worry about being overly cautious, seriously, you need to let someone know. If he’s late? Skipping–”

The professor said, “Well, Arven misses class time quite frequently actua–”

“No. No, that’s exactly what I mean,” Kaito said sternly, “This is not the time where Arven can ‘wander off’. Because he might not have done so willingly. Arven needs to be treated with an abundance of caution right now. And if he gives you a tough time about it, you can send word to the castle to me, I’ll come and sort him out, okay? I know he’s a tough kid, and the urge to give him the benefit of the doubt is high. Fine. But for right now and probably the next few weeks? Abundance of caution.”

The professor sighed a little, before glancing past Kaito. “Oh, good morning, Trish. Good job getting here on time today!”

Trish rolled her eyes, before heading to the back of the class. Narrowing her eyes a little, she told the new kid who was standing right by her desk, “Hey. Move, squirt. That’s my seat.”

Doppio gave Arven a similar look, still trying not to look at anyone else. It, uh…sure was a desk. He supposed it was good design, having bag hooks on the legs and a metal basket for, he presumed, books a student wasn’t currently using but would need at some point. Oh look, hinges…probably meant the top could tilt--

“Eep!” Doppio squeaked, looking up startled at the girl who walked up to him. “S-sorry!”

He shuffled over out of the way, but…his gaze didn’t immediately leave the girl. 

…huh. That… Uh. She had very vibrant green eyes…

Arven glared around Doppio’s shoulder. “Hey, he wasn’t doing anything, Trish. Don’t be a jerk.”

“Uh huh. Already have a crush on the new kid, Arven? ‘Bout time you hit puberty.” Trish scoffed, flopping down into her seat, before putting her legs up on the desk, leaning back and resting her head on Arven’s desk as she gave him an unimpressed look. “If you need more chances to white-knight him, I could try to steal his lunch money.”

Penny looked up from reading her book, pushing up her glasses. “Lunch money? Who’s paying for lunch?”

“Fine, I just mean stealing his money.” Trish smirked, shooting Penny a small wink. “I’ll take you out to eat with it, Penny~”

Penny rolled her eyes, looking back to her book. Trish pouted at that, before clambering down back onto her seat, leaning against her own desk as she sighed, “Whatever. Bug off, squirt, you don’t seem like the type to have a lot of coin on you anyway.”

Doppio gave Arven a soft look, flattered that he’d want to defend him…for however little he needed defending from someone just being a little rude, though, uh… Trish, huh? She, uh, was more than a little rude… 

…he was sure they’d never met, but…she looked so familiar…

Glancing over at Kaito, trying to judge whether he’d be caught trying to leave the classroom, Doppio made a sort of indistinct sound. Oddly proud and affirming. He really did try to come off like he wasn’t carrying a lot of money, he was glad that was working…

A yawn came from the last desk in the back corner where they all were, and a messy green head turned over, bleary red eyes blinking slowly. “What’s your issue today, Trish? Had to send someone to detention already for snapping your bra again?”

Trish’s nose wrinkled, crossing her arms and harrumphing a bit. “Everyone always thinks the way I dress is some sort of open invitation. Bunch of perverts. If I want to walk around naked, it’s everyone else's problem if that makes them act stupid. If they don’t want to be perverts, they need to get their mind right, it’s got nothing to do with me.”

“Heh. Awww, cute.” Kaito grinned, appearing out of nowhere as, with abandon, he went to ruffle Trish’s hair. The teenager looked absolutely flummoxed as her hair was suddenly wild and out of place– who would dare??-- as Kaito grinned at her, before looking back to Arven. “Okay! Arven, you introduced your friends to Doppio? Gave him their names?”

Arven, looking at Trish almost in awe– how was Kaito not punched in the balls yet??-- glanced back up at him. “Uuuuuh–”

Kaito immediately turned to the students around Arven, placing a hand on Doppio’s shoulder. “Hey, this is Doppio, he’s Arven’s…” Kaito glanced at Arven, before deciding to err on the side of caution, “Friend! Who are you all?”

Giovanni nodded sleepily along with Trish’s point. It was admirable, in a way. Trish could be an absolute asshole, but for some reason, though it was rare for people to move into their school district with any sort of consistency, people kept trying to target her for nonsense. Idiots seeing a pretty girl and thinking she’d be an easy target. And so they became her targets, in turn, and most of the time she got off scot free, since the teachers always favored it as a case of harassment. 

It was a tough life he didn’t envy. 

Nor was getting his hair tousled out of nowhere. To which Doppio made a choking noise, staring at Kaito with panic. Even not…yeah, not actually knowing Trish, to him it looked like Kaito had just merrily put his hand in a bear trap.

Turning red again as Kaito pushed on for introductions…

Doppio blinked, not sure he’d heard right, before he gave Kaito a sort of confused and…hurt look.

Head back in his arms, Giovanni sighed and tried not to visibly sweat, hiding himself from the prince. 

“Um, well, Aceto, these are my… classmates,” Arven said, looking to the others, before pointing at the nearby ones, “The energetic one is Minnie. The distinctly unenergetic one is Nela. The weirdo in the glasses is Penny. And, the green-haired one is Giovanni. Guys, you can all call my boyfriend,” Arven said pointedly, giving Kaito a bewildered look, ”Doppio, it’s what he prefers. Also, how has the professor not kicked you out yet, class started already?” Arven said specifically to Kaito.

“I’m just coming to collect Doppio, that’s all. Maaaaaybe someday soon you kids will all get to see more of him! We’ll see, eh?” Kaito grinned, winking at Doppio, before looking to Arven, suddenly stern. “You remember what we talked about? On the way here?”

Arven gave Kaito a dry look. How could he forget? Kaito had said in five different ways Arven could not leave school grounds today on his own. “Yep.”

“I’m trusting you to make good decisions. You need anything, you call the castle, I’ll come running, okay?” Kaito said.

Penny gave Arven a curious look at that. Trish, in the middle of putting her hair back together, raised an eyebrow too. What the heck was Arven caught up in?

Arven shrugged. “Sure. Aceto, I’ll see you after school.”

Nela, a little surprised that she and Minnie were included, since their desks were a little farther away, gave Doppio a soft wave, before sighing at Minnie’s louder greeting and trying to cut both her and Will off before anything…uncomfortable happened, though Will’s proud, “MY MAN!!” still got through. 

There was a small movement from Giovanni’s huddle, though he didn’t look up. Honestly, Doppio was a little envious, as he burned red, being put, at least partially, in the spotlight. He could only give Kaito a sour look at his nudging, and more at his total turn-face at Arven again, and…

Doppio let out a shaky sigh. “See you, Arven. I’ll come by the gates to meet you, like before.”

And then with a quick, unflorished, “....okay, bye!” Doppio was out of the room. 

And it was only after Kaito followed did Giovanni tilt his head up again. “...you’ve gotten yourself an overbearing busybody, huh?”

“Oh, you have no idea.” Arven sighed, brushing his bangs over his eye a little, leaning back into his chair. “I swear, I think it’s a mental illness. Like, legitimately. Watch out, Trish, that hair ruffling thing he does? He does that to kids he wants to adopt.”

Trish’s brow’s pinched together. “What? I don’t think he even knows my name.”

“Yeah, but he overheard you complain about something, and that’s it, you might be doomed,” Arven explained plainly. “Watch, the next time you get into a fight with someone over your clothes? He’s just gonna… appear,” Arven said, moving his hands up and splaying out his fingers, like smoke spreading, “out of nowhere. And busy-body his way in. That’s how it happened for me and Aceto.”

“I thought his name was Doppio?” Penny asked.

Arven puffed up his chest a little, crossing his arms over it as he smirked. “I get boyfriend privileges.”

Giovanni sighed, closing his eyes with a resigned nod. “Wish it was. Then there could be some sort of treatment for it.” Instead, the rest of them were left out in the wilds to the busybodies’ nosy whims. Giovanni had long-suffered his siblings--it was a long, never-ending road ahead for Arven. 

Smiling softly, Nela looked back at the group in the corner, Minnie helping turn her chair around with a grin. “That sounds kind of sweet, though. White-knighting isn’t all bad if you actually need help…isn’t it?” Nela hummed, tilting her head a little, before she gave Arven a nod. “Oh, and congratulations to you and Doppio, Arven. We thought Will was just making stuff up again, but if you two got together… Congrats.”

Again, that swell of pride. Arven rubbing under his nose a little to hide his pleased smile. “It’s pretty wild, isn’t it? Especially with him… he’s way out of my league. I have no idea how I did it.”

“Well, at least you know,” Penny said, flipping through her book, “Don’t let the Rabbits hear you say that though. You don’t need to give them extra ammunition.”

“Pfff, what could they possibly say about that that I don’t already know?” Arven said, scowling a little, “There’s worse ways to be insulted than being told you’re dating someone too good for you.”

“I imagine they’d start pointing out you’re dating a male Trish,” Penny said plainly.

“What/What!?” Arven and Trish both said at once, sounding bewildered. Before Trish leaned towards Penny, wrinkling her nose. “Are you actually blind behind those specs, cutie? What, cause we both have pink hair?”

“Sure, I’m blind,” Penny said, flipping another page, “Whatever, maybe if you guys can’t see it then it’s not as weird as it otherwise looks. Cause it looks weird.”

“Aceto doesn’t look like Trish. Aceto is way prettier than Trish–ow ow ow, back off!”

“You wanna make me, punk? Say it again!” Trish said, twisting Arven’s ear as he tried to push her wrist off.

The professor glanced up, saw it was Trish and Arven arguing, and looked back down at his work. Nothing new there.

Giovanni gave Penny a considering look before he grinned. A look not wholly unfamiliar to his classmates, but considering the cruel twist it tended to take on, not usually a welcome sight. 

“You see it too, then? His name means ‘Double’ as well… Wouldn’t it be fucked up if we just met a real doppelganger?” Giovanni said with a sort of macabre humor. “They’re said to be a bad omen, showing up if their double is about to die; or, in some lore, they kill their targets themselves, taking their place. Or they have nothing to do with their mirror at all, and are a sign of bad things to come in general.”

“Well,” the green-haired teen yawned, “Guess we know to check the obituary section coming up.”

Arven rolled his eyes. “His name’s Doppio because he’s awesome and Doppio’s a cool name. Nothing more, nothing less.”

“Wait, which one of us dies in this scenario?” Trish asked, looking disturbed, “Me or him?”

“I think you, if you’re his double,” Penny said plainly.

“Please, I could take on that squirt!”

“What, you gonna group dance him into the ground?” Penny smirked.

“Hey, dancing got me this body, didn’t it?” Trish frowned, leaning back, showing off her muscles a little, “If he wants to fight me, he better be ready to deal with a Spice Girl!”

“Doppio could take you, but he won’t have to. I’d put you in a headlock first,” Arven threatened… before shivering in fear a little when Trish tipped her head backwards, giving him a scathing look. “I-I would!”

“I’d be more worried about that big dog of yours,” Trish said, “Well, unless I happen to have food on me. Then I think I’m good.”

She was probably right. But before Arven could think of a comeback, the professor called for attention.

-

“Arven’s class looks like the lively type,” Kaito grinned at Doppio, glancing behind himself at the school again. “...Doppio, if Arven told you he was planning to leave today, now would be a good time to tell me. I can just say I guessed, we don’t have to say you said anything. If he’s planning to leave for lunch or something, I can come back at lunchtime and, ya know, make sure he’s not wandering off. It’s important, it’s not safe for him to be alone right now.”

Doppio’s face had cooled a little, as he’d spedwalked out of the high school, but there was still something embarrassed in the irritable look he shot Kaito. “You’re doing it again. You said it a million times as we were walking here, he’s not a small child or…me. Arven’s not an idiot, he’s not going to just walk off on his own on a whim, so stop treating him like he will.”

He glowered more at Kaito. “Though even if we had discussed him leaving school early, I wouldn’t tell you like this. I’m just worried about him, not a snitch, and I don’t need you acting like I am. Unless it seems to you so much like I don’t care about my boyfriend.”

Huffing, Doppio crossed his arms as he walked down the street, double checking Dr. Mariah’s office address. “...you don’t need to follow me the whole way there either. Just go home already.”

Kaito sighed, rubbing his goatee a little. “Actually, I’m betting that if you care about him, you’d tell me if he was planning to put himself in danger. And neither of you are idiots. You’re just reckless. Which is fine, it’s healthy to be a little reckless in your youth! Mentally. Physically, I don’t want your recklessness to get you guys hurt.”

Following at Doppio’s heels, Kaito put his hands behind his neck, resting his head in his palms as his elbows hung in the air. “And no, obviously no, it’s laughable you think I’m not gonna walk you the whole way. It’s not just dangerous for Arven. In fact, it’s notably more dangerous for you. I’m not letting anything happen to you.”

Really, Doppio would just try to talk Arven out of a dangerous idea himself, if it came down to it, but…really, it was like he’d said. Arven wasn’t an idiot, and he knew they were in danger. Doppio had explained just how powerful his boss was, and he trusted Arven not to take chances with his life. 

Getting Kaito involved was just a non-issue. 

Doppio glanced back with a sharp glare. “So you have to physically be here yourself, to ensure personally that nothing happens.”

Sighing, he rubbed the bridge of his nose a bit. “...I know it’s more dangerous for me…but it’s always been. I at least have more knowledge and experience of how to avoid that danger…but because of that, I do know I have a better chance with someone with me.”

A deeper sigh. “...really wish you would’ve let me walk home that first night, though.”

Kaito pouted a little. “Oh, I see, Arven’s gone and told on me, huh? Sharing my neurosis? Well, bully to him, everyone already knows I’m crazy. So, nyeh,” Kaito said, sticking his tongue out at Doppio, “If no one else is doing it? Then yeah, I gotta do it personally. We all gotta live with that.”

Though, his expression softened as Doppio continued, sighing at the last bit as he rubbed the back of his neck. “Yeah? I mean, I probably understand why, and I’m hoping it’s, ya know… you just resenting me butting in and all of that…”

“...but I’m sorry if it’s more than that,” Kaito said softly, “If I got you into trouble that night. I never wanted you to be hurt.”

Doppio looked at the ground, setting his jaw for a moment before he looked at the address again, taking the next turn. “...you know? The worst part was that I didn’t get into trouble. Boss was worried about me being out later than I’d said, and he was worried about the rash I got, and I did get the whole, ‘I wish you’d be less reckless’ lecture while he tended to ‘em…but that was it.”

“No, it was just…the start of you butting into everything, and Boss realizing the position that put me in and…everything. If I’d just walked home by myself, like I always did? None of this would’ve happened.”

Kaito had already known that, but… it was still disappointing, to hear it confirmed. But, well, he knew that Doppio was going to resent this for a long time. Resent him. Maybe forever…

That was okay. Kaito needed to stick by the revelation that he had had with hot older guy. It was better for Doppio to be safe, than it was for him to like Kaito. To like what had happened. Doppio was safe. That was the priority.

…ngh. Still didn’t feel great.

Forcing a smile onto his face, Kaito sped up a little, walking in step with Doppio as he looked down at him, not unsympathetic as he said softly, “If it eases your conscience any, ‘letting’ me walk you home… like, you’ve met me, right? If it wasn’t going to be that night, it was gonna be another. Heck, I kept stumbling into you in alleys, eventually I’d have noticed something that made me worry, and, well… it’s not your fault, that I butted in. You don’t have to feel responsible. I very much happened to you, and… I am sorry for that.”

“...” Kaito bit his lower lip, looking up at the sky a bit, “...hey, so…”

Should he tell him? Now that Kaito had heard? Should Doppio at least know he knew?

“...I have some info, on your case. I found out last night, I overheard my husband getting debriefed with his father. And… I won’t keep that info from you. If you want it.”

Doppio huffed, biting down on his lip. “...you’re not all powerful. You’re nosy, and have far too few reservations about getting close to people, both physically and emotionally, but you’re not…inevitable. And trying to act like you are, to clear people of their own choices is…insulting. And, I-I’m no therapist, but probably bad for you too, if I had to guess. Puts too much on your shoulders.”

“...a lot of the time, I avoid fights just…’cause whatever I’d gain “winning” just isn’t worth what a fight would cost having it at all. I’m not all powerful either, so…maybe, yeah, you would’ve ended up following me home someday…but maybe not. But I didn’t even try to prevent it, so…” Doppio sighed, shrugging. Already tired of belaboring the point, when it was already done. There was no point, ruing his actions…even if he still had regrets. 

However, kindly, Kaito gave him something brand new to fret over. 

Doppio’s gaze snapped upwards, widening a bit. He…knew he probably shouldn’t ask. That whatever plan Boss had, Doppio just…shouldn’t mess it up more than he already had. But…

“Yes. I want it. I-is - did they find him?” Doppio said quickly, eyes widening more, voice growing a bit desperate. “Is he okay?!”

“He’s fine,” Kaito said sternly, “He… surrendered. He came quietly, apparently, it was a really peaceful arrest. But, he has been arrested. But apparently he’s been incredibly cooperative, and… from what I heard? Confessed to the drowning.”

“And, honestly, I don’t know if I would have been able to bring myself to tell you otherwise,” Kaito confessed, “But the fact that he’s working with the guards, and is willing to admit he hurt you? That’s… that’s a great sign, I think. Like, maybe he understands this situation better than I was giving him credit for.”

Doppio was sweet, in his own ways. Listening to Doppio, even if only begrudgingly,  worry about Kaito’s mental state by taking responsibility, among his insistence it was insulting to take Doppio’s agency out of the equation… he was a good kid. Kaito didn’t hate the idea that maybe his ‘boss’ really had cared more about Doppio than it had sounded like from his actions. If he had given himself up and confessed? Maybe he recognized what he had done to Doppio was wrong… that was a good sign, to Kaito. A sign that maybe Doppio hadn’t been entirely deluded, to feel cared about by the man. Kaito wouldn’t begrudge the kid more hope in repairing that broken relationship… safely. On his own terms. Still fuck Mr. Drowner.

Doppio let out a relieved breath, but…still. He clenched his eyes shut (just for a moment, he didn’t need to show up to his first therapy appointment having eaten shit on the sidewalk) as a clench went through his chest. …being cooperative and…confessing didn’t really…sound like Boss. But it didn’t matter. Whatever Boss’s plan was…at least he was safe. A peaceful arrest meant that no one was hurt, and…

(...and maybe in custody someone would…be keeping an eye on Boss’s meals, and giving him a place to rest and…)

…maybe they’d let him testify, and…and even if Boss confessed, then…

“He’s really smart…” Doppio said softly, his voice fragile. “He’d have a plan for how to deal with this the best way…I know it.”

Again, Doppio looked up with too wide eyes. “...if he’s in custody then…then he’s in the castle, right? Can I go see him?”

Kaito winced, gritting his teeth a little, before forcing his jaw to relax. “I don’t know where he’s being kept. It might be the castle, yes. And, we’ve talked about this before, I know I can’t make you not see him. But I’m still asking you to not do it alone, or in secret. Again, I can’t make you not see him… trust me, I know how easy it is to visit a prisoner if you really want to. But it’s still not good for you.”

“Why?” Doppio pleaded with Kaito, his voice breaking, before he stopped. Visibly pulling himself together with a breath as the two of them stopped in front of Dr. Mariah’s office building. And with a sharp shaking of his head, Doppio’s voice was even once more. 

“No, just…forget it. My appointment’s for an hour and a half, so if you’re insistent on sticking around…go find something else to do, don’t just stay here waiting for me. Bye.”

And, with purpose, Doppio strode through the door, hands twisted in his sweater sleeves.

Kaito’s shoulders fell a little, heart squeezing at the despair in Doppio’s voice, wanting to reassure him, pull him into a hug and promise him it was all going to be okay, someday… but Doppio had had enough, heading inside with a final dismissal. 

…maybe Kaito should wait out here. What if…

Before shaking his head a little, feeling foolish. Kaito could trust Dr. Mariah, if anything happened. It was a relief, honestly, knowing Doppio was leaving him to go straight to her. Not only because she could absolutely protect him, but also, man, if anyone could help him deal with all of that…

Maybe he’d get some coffee, and do a little exercise. Sit somewhere and people watch. An hour and a half would pass like nothing.

- 

Blair had greeted Doppio at the desk, taking his information, before walking him to the office in question. Knocking on the door, he called in, “Dr. Mariah. Your appointment is here.”

“Send him in,” Dr. Mariah called through.

Inside was a warm, comfortable office, that was slightly darkened by furniture and decorations that suited the tastes of the often elaborately dressed woman. While the lights were bright and the sun was shining in through a window blocked lightly with airy plants, the drapes pulled to each side were thick, velvet linings, that matched the dark red and deep purples of the furniture, all of which was cast with a tint of blue from the massive, near wall-sized aquarium. There was a large, elaborate red chair, countered by a comfortable loveseat and a single, plush chair, and Dr. Mariah was sitting in the large, elaborate chair as she fussed with her journal.

She looked up when Doppio came in, smiling lightly at him. “Welcome, Aceto Doppio. You’re right on time. Please, feel free to take a seat.”

The receptionist was wonderfully professional, which Doppio appreciated, and he took a breath, steeling himself for his first therapy appointment…but all breath was promptly stolen from him as he walked in Dr. Mariah’s office and was faced with the biggest aquarium Doppio had ever seen. While he had wanted to make something of a good impression, despite them already having met once, Doppio couldn’t help but be stuck stunned for a moment, watching countless fish swim by with wide eyes. 

But he managed to shake himself, as the therapist’s words sunk into his head, and he offered a meek smile in return, finding a seat on the plush chair. “Good morning. Um…wow, you…really weren’t kidding about the fish…”

“They’re quite lovely, aren’t they,” Dr. Mariah confirmed, looking over to the aquarium with an openly fond look, “I find aquatic life soothing. They’re wonderfully… straight forward things. They live in a world all their own, and we, you and I, are ever at most a strange entertainment to them. A passing, exotic thing that they’ll notice and never consider again… well, these ones. My fish upstairs have a bit more memory retention, but still. Entirely selfish, self-centered things. It can be comforting, observing a creature who is entirely confident in its place in the world.”

“And they’re quite pretty,” Dr. Mariah added in, after a moment of watching them swim, before turning her attention back to Doppio. “Have you developed any questions for me, since the last time we spoke? Did you take another look at that pamphlet I left you?”

Doppio nodded slightly, though it was more than just polite agreement. …described as she had, Doppio…almost felt a sort of kinship to the fish. It really was nice, being assured of your world and place in it…

…though he had given that up, and now there was no going back. 

“I did read through it again, um…it’s kinda…dense,” Doppio nodded slowly, tinting pink. “But I think I get it, and…nothing really stood out, that I’d want clarified. Um…oh.” 

Blinking at himself, Doppio took out his notebook and flipped to the most recent page, eyes quickly flicking over it. “Um, I was talking with my boyfriend this morning and, uh, well, I’d sorta been thinking about it on my own before that, but, uh, you asked for therapy goals? Not just topics. …um, right?” He sent her an unsure look.

“A-and I think kind of a big one right now is…I-I feel like I’m freaking out, um, in a big way, like…almost every day lately? And…I’d like to stop. Though, um…” Doppio chewed his lip unsurely. “My boyfriend pointed out that every time I’ve had, like…a real panic attack, it’s been with Kaito? So, um…I’m not really…sure if that’s a…direct correlation or something but…it’s something to bring up. I think.”

Dr. Mariah nodded. “Goals are important, and I’m glad you brought it up already, as that is something I wanted to get into. It’s important to know why this process is important to you. It’s too difficult an endeavor to not know exactly what makes it worth doing.”

Tapping at her book, Dr. Mariah tilted her head a little, observing Doppio… before asking, “What does it mean to you? To not be, as you’ve put it, ‘freaking out’. What does that look like?”

“Um…” Doppio thought for a moment, lightly thumbing through the pages of his notebook. “...well, uh, not? Having panic attacks? Or crying for, like…half an hour? I could really do without one of those happening, like, every day. I-I don’t need to…never feel uncomfortable or nervous or sad, but…”

He sighed, slouching a little as he smoothed back his bangs. “...it’s exhausting, having those things happen… I hate them, but…I-I used to be able to pull off surprise all-nighters if I had to. Lately, I don’t think I’ve been awake for even 12 hours straight at any one time. And…sure, I guess I’ve been in recovery, but…everything hurts, and it’s always worse after a freak-out. I just…want it to stop.”

Dr. Mariah nodded. “...I’d like you to answer it again.”

“I’m not saying your answer was wrong. Or dishonest.” She explained, “And it’s fine if after a second attempt, you find yourself wanting to say the same thing again. This is purely an exercise. But, if you’re willing to indulge me, I’d like you to explain to me again. What is your goal? What does it look like, successfully implemented? Be as long or as short with your explanation as you like. Tell me again.”

Doppio gave her a confused, mildly nervous look. He…wasn’t really sure what saying it again would do… Should he try to explain it differently? But she said it was fine if it was the same…

Starting to scratch at his hand, Doppio started again, his voice more unsure. “Um… I wanna stop…uh… Going full panic mode? A-at least as much… Not every day. I-I, um…don’t want my life disrupted,” he nodded shallowly, knowing he’d heard that phrase somewhere before, and knowing it was an important way to describe certain things, “By…getting so worked up about things that I can’t…do anything. I just…want to be able to do what I need to do w-with ample energy, like I could before.”

Giving Dr. Mariah a worried look, Doppio waited with an anxious eagerness, hoping that that was a better answer.

“... less, panic attacks. Not a daily thing. Less, not none. A lack of disruption in your life. Stability, reliability. A return to normal…”

Dr. Mariah observed Doppio a bit. “...why?”

“What would you do, with that steady, consistent energy? How would you spend that uninterrupted time?” She asked, “What would be the benefit of those improvements?”

Doppio shrugged awkwardly, blushing lightly. “...I mean, ideally I’d stop having them altogether, but…I don’t want to set my hopes too high.”

He gave her a confused look, feeling like a therapist of all people would…understand why someone wouldn’t want to be panicking constantly? But, well… 

“Um… Well. I’d probably spend more time that’s…less stressful with Arven, but…” Doppio looked to the side, scratching at his wrist now. “...I’m not…really sure what I want to do with my time, as like…a big, overall thing right now. I don’t think I…want to go right back into getting a job…and being legally 14 now, I can’t, really, unless I get another illegal job, but…considering everything, that’d be a pretty bad idea for me right now… I don’t know. …I don’t know…”

Deflated quite a bit, Doppio shrugged again. “...the benefit would be not feeling like shit as much?”

Dr. Mariah smiled lightly. “It’s not the strongest of goals, I’ll admit. I’ve found that with my patients, eventually they need something more solid to hold onto, than a general idea of feeling better. But, I can see you struggling, and it is still a goal in and of itself. We’ll aim for that for now, a general improvement on coping with your symptoms. But, over time, I’d like us to revisit this, perhaps a few times. Developing your goals as your mindset develops.”

“With that established,” Dr. Mariah said, flipping over her notebook, looking inside, before resting it on her lap, “You’ve said both that you’re experiencing the worst of your panic attacks with Kaito, while also dealing with them on a daily basis? Could you explain more what you mean by that? Is Kaito inspiring daily panic attacks, or is it more you’re experiencing specific types of attacks around him?”

“...m kinda new to goals,” Doppio mumbled, feeling kind of…embarrassed. “‘S’hard to know what to do when it’s not literally written out in a checklist to do everyday…”

But…well. They could revisit it, and…hopefully he’d learn how to make better goals for himself. That, ironically, could be a goal too. 

Sighing, Doppio looked back up and gave Dr. Mariah a sort of helpless shrug. “...I think Arven thinks that Kaito’s provoking me, but…I dunno, that doesn’t seem quite right… Just…since this all started, I think…Kaito’s just been around, o-or has been the impetus for the things that stress me out the most so…I freak out on him. I’ve been panicked and sad before, sure…”

Doppio’s expression tightened. “...but I’ve never not just…straight up not been able to breathe, or…been so scared I…think I black out? Though those might just be memory gaps, I don’t know… But it’s like I just collapse and…that’s only happened around Kaito. And I don’t usually cry this much either.”

Doppio grimaced, looking to the side. “...at least in public.”

Dr. Mariah smiled lightly, though her eyes never lost that inquisitive, searching light as she said, “I believe the implication there is that you have felt like that in private? Could you tell me more about that?”

“Not to the…suffocation extent,” Doppio mumbled, “But… I mean… Everyone cries. I just…”

Doppio blinked, before something both puzzled and enlightened went through his expression, and he looked up at Dr. Mariah with a tentative look. “...um… I know you said you, uh, aren’t human anymore, but you were at one point, so, um… Is it…a… ‘within normal human experience’ thing to, um…”

His gaze wandered, trying to figure out how to put the feeling into words. “....feel, uh…raw? I guess? A-and like…all the atoms in your body are missing a pair, so everything feels…spaced out and cold and…r-really, really lonely?”

“The human experience is more varied than even I can account for all of it,” Dr. Mariah said, “But. Considering your magical nature, I’d ask how much of that is a metaphor, and how much is an accurate representation of how you physically, in your skin, feel.”

Doppio gnawed on the side of his lip and scratched his cheek for a moment. “...I-I know… I mean, I wouldn’t exist if…um, my atoms weren’t where they’re supposed to be.”

“...but all of it?”

“Hmmm… I think we’d need to talk about it more thoroughly to determine exactly what’s happening with you, but… for now, let’s assume that the raw feeling? The, perhaps… empty? Feeling? Leads to you feeling cold and lonely. An emotional reaction to a physical symptom. Are you saying, if I can guess, that you feel lonely when you are alone? To a physical suffering degree? The answer is allowed to be no, I’m simply trying to understand.”

Doppio thought for a moment before shaking his head. “I mean…I can be on my own fine. For a lot of my work, I was on my own, and…even in my downtime, that was fine. A-and…I wouldn’t really call it…physically suffering… That seems like a lot…”

Looking away, Doppio sighed, fidgeting with nerves and embarrassment. “...it was just…sometimes I’d wake up feeling like that? A-and…I wasn’t…actually alone, I knew Boss was home too, but…” His eyes lowered. “...it’d feel…unbearable. And inescapable. And it hurt…”

Hunching his shoulders a bit, Doppio nervously mumbled, “...’n sometimes I’d get…really scary thoughts ‘n…stuff. So I just cried… I’d get over it, eventually.”

Dr. Mariah hummed.

“...and these feelings? The ones that happened when the man you lived with was home… they’re the ones comparable with how you feel with Kaito?” She asked, “The more intense panic attacks you have around him?”

Doppio’s eyebrows furrowed before he shook his head. “...no, the ones with Kaito are worse. A-and it’s not…loneliness, or feeling raw. It’s…”

Gold eyes unfocused a little as Doppio trailed off into silence for a few moments, thumb tracing the edge of his notebook. Memories long gone to him…

…but not completely. 

“...fear.”

“Hmmmm.” Dr. Mariah closed her eyes a moment, the room quiet as she considered that. The bubbles of the aquarium blubbering along in the quiet…

“It’s the first concern you brought up today, and considering your current situation, it has precedence as well, as far as priorities go. Kaito, at the moment, is a substantial part of your average day. And if you’re falling into fearful panic attacks around him consistently, we should explore that. Are you comfortable with that?”

Doppio nodded, before giving Dr. Mariah a small, tired smile. “I mean…there’s not a lot I’m comfortable with these days, but, yeah. If I’m ever gonna stop feeling bad, I need to face the things that do that, and…there’s not really a reason I can see to put it off.”

The smile fell soon after. “Oh, um… For uh… I dunno. But I think I should clarify, um…I’m not scared of Kaito. I’m just scared around him…sometimes. I think.”

Dr. Mariah nodded, and there was a slight drop in her shoulders, the most small display of relief. “I was planning to ask that, yes. Though, if you do fear Kaito, that is something you can tell me without fear of undue reproach or defense. When I am speaking with you, you are my highest priority as a patient. And while Kaito has made considerable progress over the last year through a great deal of effort… he is a man who, officially, has struggled with rage issues. If he inspires fear in you, you can tell me, I will believe you.”

“But, until you clarify otherwise, let’s accept your first response as your honest feelings and explore them.” Dr. Mariah said, “I know you have memory issues. If you can, I’d like to hear about the time you’ve had a panic attack around Kaito that is most vivid to you. If you feel like you can’t? I’d like to explore a mental exercise with you, where you invent an incident with Kaito where you’re having a panic attack. Both paths forward would have merit for exploring your feelings on the subject, don’t feel you have to do one or the other.”

“I mean…he can be kind of intimidating sometimes,” Doppio admitted, though there were far fewer nerves and hesitation in his body saying this, compared to much he had been saying so far. “But he’s not a scary person. And as much as he’s screwed it up…I do know that he just wants to help.”

Sighing, Doppio nodded and looked through his notebook again. “Um… I had a big one on Friday, but…I don’t remember a ton of it. I uh…” A worried line furrowed between Doppio’s brows. “...I had, um, a second, like…memory stutter later that day, and…while I think I’ve gotten a lot of stuff back in order, it’s still kind of…difficult. To think through clearly. But…I know we were grocery shopping, and on a roof and…I don’t remember what the attack was about, but I…” Doppio’s face fell in shame. “...I put off the cooking lesson I was gonna give him for a bit ‘cause…I couldn’t really stay upright. Took a shower, threw up, talked with Arven for a bit, then just…took a nap. And I wasn’t really feeling great later either…”

“And um…” A more worried expression crossed over Doppio’s face as he glanced up to Dr. Mariah warily. “...I have more bullshit.”

“Sounds like a very physical reaction,” Dr. Mariah mused, tapping at her journal, “If you’re open to sharing more? If you find yourself willing to see me long term, it’s all things we’ll go over eventually. And there’s no such thing as too much information, in regards to us exploring what you need to talk about. Please, what’s the rest of the ‘bullshit’?”

Doppio nodded and took a small breath. Eyes looking around the room as he worried his lip between his teeth. “...”

“...I…um. May be able to manipulate time. Um. Potentially…uh…literally? And not just…people’s perceptions of it.”

“...” Dr. Mariah observed him, before tilting her head a little. Her long, black hair falling over her shoulders a bit. “...hm. How much do you know about time-manipulation, as far as myth and stereotypes go? Time manipulation in regards to the greater supernatural world, I mean.”

Doppio grew pink in the face as he tapped his fingers together. “...nothing? I…um,” he cleared his throat, “...I tried to pretend it wasn’t happening…but I made a bunch of flowers bloom when I was hanging out with Arven and…the snappy thing happened again, and…Amaina’s known what I’ve been doing for…a while.”

“Ah, I did wonder where your little companion was. I thought perhaps she had not followed you here…” Dr. Mariah looked around. “...hm. Well, no sign of her yet. Perhaps she did.”

“...” Dr. Mariah rested against the back of her seat, looking to the ceiling a bit. “...I’m conflicted. I don’t intend to distract from your panic attacks by diving into theory and rhetoric. In truth, I can only guess at the nature of your abilities right now. But, if some of your tension is in denying those abilities, perhaps it might be wise to explore them until you feel more familiar…”

“...what would you like to know?” Dr. Mariah said, “That’s how we can keep from falling off course too much. I could get into all the minutiae of rumors and heresy I’ve seen over the years, but let’s limit it to ideas you’re already concerned about. As a fellow supernatural: anything you’d like to ask me?”

Doppio…didn’t follow a lot of that, and he just sighed softly, still nibbling on his lip. “...I’m not sure… Um… The reason I…brought it up was ‘cause…one of the panic attacks I do remember better was…’cause I, uh…went…back? And…stopped something from…happening…I think? I don’t…really remember what, it just kinda felt like a moment of, um…deja vu, and just…a sense that something really bad was gonna happen if I left it so…I ran away, and Kaito chased me, and I threw up in a park.”

“It’s just…scary,” Doppio admitted softly, rubbing his arm. “I never… I dunno. Daydreamed about having superpowers, or anything like that… Then suddenly…things are skipping around and pausing and…I don’t know what’s going on and…” He squinted a bit. “...it doesn’t even help anything. I just…made it worse, if anything. I just…don’t want to use it, but…sometimes I do without meaning to, or…” His face fell more. “...or I get scared and…it feels like the only thing I really can do, and… I don’t like it.”

Doppio tapped his foot on the ground a little. “...Arven thinks it’s really cool.”

Dr. Mariah was a little surprised. She had been genuinely afraid of derailing this conversation entirely from Doppio’s feelings to Doppio’s curiosity about the potential source or abilities of his powers, and yet… Doppio had brushed right by the offer to discuss it like it didn’t apply to him at all. Repression? Or just genuine disinterest? 

Perhaps he simply wasn’t old enough to care much about his own, for lack of a better term, ‘ancestry’. Doppio’s youth gifting him with the same confidence in his place in the universe that all 2 year olds had. Curious.

Still, it made Dr. Mariah’s focus much easier. Doppio had panic attacks around Kaito. He wasn’t scared ‘of’ Kaito, but these panic attacks– which she would guess lead to his use of abilities– were born from fear. 

But still the most difficult thing was his lack of memory of what had caused that fear in the first place. And in that, Dr. Mariah found herself returning to her previous mental exercise. One that she had developed specifically for children. The way they told stories often more helpful in understanding how they were perceiving reality than asking them to explain what had actually happened.

So, she tried, “It’s understandable, to want to reject the use of an ability that you didn’t volunteer for. To put it in a crude example, someone handed a knife should not, in the future, be expected to solve all of their problems, or even any of them, with said knife. They just have a knife now. And knives can be as dangerous as they can be useful. It’s wise to side on the edge of caution when exploring a weapon you’ve been handed.”

“But, staying with that crude metaphor, knives are useful for far more than harming people, and discovering and appreciating those uses is also an entirely valid way of approaching it. And, while I can’t say for certain that’s what Arven means when he’s impressed by your abilities, it is an understandable reaction on his part too, to appreciate what you can do for its benefits.” Dr. Mariah said, before pausing, “...or perhaps he just thinks the knife is cool, because knives, by themselves, devoid of purpose or function or harm, can just be very cool. They look cool. There’s nothing wrong with having an appreciation for your own abilities simply because they add a certain ‘aesthetic’ to your life either.”

“But, how you’re describing it? Using your ability, or sticking with the metaphor, swinging the knife without plan or purpose, in moments of fear, and having no idea what’s going to happen next… that is an issue,” Dr. Mariah sighed, “Something like that would require some sort of guide or mento–”

OoO Dibs.

“...Amaina, you can’t call ‘dibs’ on a position to teach him something you yourself know nothing about–”

OOO DIBS I already called it we are WOOOOORKING on it he’ll be fine its all GOOD

Amaina, showing up, plopped herself firmly onto Doppio’s lap, with a little ‘harrumph’ and a pout, crossing her arms as she once again exclaimed, Dibs! 

“We’ll discuss this more later,” Dr. Mariah sighed, “But, for now, perhaps the wisest course is to understand why the frequency of these attacks have gone up since meeting Kaito. So, Doppio, I’d like you to try the other exercise I mentioned earlier. I would like you to invent a scenario, where you are talking to Kaito, and a panic attack occurs. Entirely fabricated. Tell me a story.”

Doppio nodded a bit, smiling softly. “Arven’s really clever about…well, everything, but magic stuff too. If this was, uh, his deal? He’d probably’ve figured out, like…millions of little ways to do cool things, or even just more about the nature of it. …he said he was a little jealous, since…I guess, objectively, it’s pretty incredible. And…that’s impressive. I really do get why he thinks it’s cool, and we’ve talked about it… It’s kinda…um, a relief, since if he was…I dunno, grossed out or freaked out, I think I’d be taking it even worse. I guess I’ll get to the point where I think it’s cooler eventually, but…I’m not there yet.”

…and just using it randomly probably…wasn’t good. For anyone. But, uh…

Snorting with soft amusement, Doppio looked down as Amaina joined the session. Giving her a fond pat on her head as he gave Dr. Mariah a sheepish shrug. “...she has called dibs for, like…two weeks or something.”

Taking a breath, Doppio straightened and settled on a mildly worried look. “...I’m not very good at stories… Um…” …some scenario where he was talking with Kaito, and had a panic attack…but not something that had happened… “Uh…” Doppio’s lips turned in a weird sort of wobble. “...he’s…um…snooping in our room and…finds the gear? And, uh…makes up some ridiculous story about it, before even trying to ask, um…but I don’t…”

Doppio huffed. “...no. I think that’d just be stressful, but…I dunno if I’d actually fully freak out from that. Um…”

Doppio deflated, something tightening uncomfortably in his core. “...probably would freak out if he told me that the king decided to execute Boss…”

A gear. Hm.

Kaito brings word about an execution… there was something there. Not ‘Kaito executes’ but ‘Kaito brings word’...

“Would Kaito be the one to tell you something like that?” Dr. Mariah asked, “Or would this scenario be unchanging if it was a guardsman, or the king himself who told you? Why Kaito specifically?”

Doppio nodded. “Well, I, yeah, I’d probably freak out on whoever told me something like that…but it’s most likely that Kaito would be the one to tell me. He’s ‘taken responsibility’,” Doppio rolled his eyes a little, before sighing. “The only time someone else has told me what’s gonna happen to me was, uh, during the CPS interview but I wasn’t…”

He looked to the side, voice lowering into a mumble. “...super…paying attention.”

“So a similar situation happened with a CPS agent, but it sounds like you may have dissociated from the conversation.” Dr. Mariah said, a realization coming to her. Oh, hmm… this was actually very important, specifically to her, “They brought you news you didn’t like, or displayed to you a reality you weren’t comfortable with, but you managed to avoid triggering your abilities by not paying attention to them? Is that a fair assessment of what you’re talking about?”

“....nnnnno…” Doppio said softly, looking around as he scratched at his wrist, his arms around Amaina. “...they wanted to hear about…the stuff Kaito reported, that Boss did to me and I…”

Doppio’s gaze dulled as he trailed off, before he shook his head. “...but I did pause things. I…had a, um…more conscious choice, while that was happening, about what to do next, but…I just let it go.”

Dr. Mariah tapped at her journal, “You paused ‘things’, as in you paused time? Or you felt more in control of the conversation in general?”

“Time. I…” Doppio furrowed his eyebrows. “...I didn’t try to. But…um… I can’t, uh…move? I guess, when that happens? ‘Cause everything’s stopped, right… But…I don’t know… It’s…almost like I got the impression I could…” 

He squinted. “...I could look around, though. I…don’t remember if I could do that before.”

“It does sound like you had more control in that conversation in general. Whether by time or by how the conversation proceeded.” Dr. Mariah observed, “They were asking you questions, and you provided answers. When you needed a break, you stopped time and looked around. You were calm.”

“I think your panic attacks, based on this information, really are just panic attacks.” Dr. Mariah said, “But come with the unfortunate side effect of your using your abilities blindly. A symptom of your fear, not a cause of it.”

“Do you feel out of control, when you’re around Kaito?” She asked.

Doppio made an unsure noise. “...didn’t feel calm… Didn’t really feel much of anything, ‘til Prince Kokichi poked me, then…just felt kinda helpless ‘cause they decided Boss had kidnapped me, and…” He looked to the side. Even with the non-disclosure stuff, uncomfortable discussing that with anyone but Arven. 

Sighing, Doppio worried his thumbnail into the underside of his wrist. “...yeah. I keep saying stuff I don’t want to, and crying a lot, and…everything started falling apart when we started seeing each other more… I do know it wasn’t all him, but…sometimes it just feels like he ruined my life.”

Dr. Mariah considered the boy for a moment. She was well aware that the age ‘14’ was a fairly arbitrary number he had been assigned largely due to outside pressure, but… he did look it, in this moment. Young. Sad. A little angry. A little adrift.

“...would you say– and it’s alright to say no– that you’ve found yourself trusting Kaito more than you have others in your life?”

A slightly annoyed, sad look crossed over Doppio’s face as he nodded. “...I shouldn’t, anymore but…I do. He at least tries to be nice to me which…is a lot more than other people do.”

Doppio sighed, melancholy falling more over him. “...after I got the ventilation thing, Kaito apparently convinced me to take sick leave at the castle…but I don’t remember that at all. And I didn’t, when I woke up really sick in some room I’d never seen before… But his friend was outside the room, and said she was Kaito’s friend and I just…felt really relieved. ‘Cause that meant I was somewhere safe…”

Dr. Mariah nodded, humming lightly at that, “Is it possible you might find yourself having more panic attacks around Kaito, because you’re more willing to be…”

She paused, before murmuring to herself, “Mind reading.”

“Strike that. Let me try again.” She said, considering Doppio, “Has Kaito stopped feeling like a safe person to be around? A safe space in general? Are you experiencing more of these panic attacks since you woke up in the castle?”

Tightening his arms around Amaina, Doppio gave a frustrated nod. Before grimacing as he amended, “...still safe, like…physically, I think. Mostly. But…I can’t tell him anything, ‘cause he just tells every d - every person he comes across. And we’ve already talked about it, but he gets really mean to Arven…”

Huffing, Doppio glared at the floor. “...the whole reason why I started considering therapy was…’cause I told Kaito I was…having scary thoughts ‘n…some that were kinda…suicide-ish, sorta, and I told him, specifically, before everything, to never tell Arven… And immediately he told his husbands, and they all just…ambushed us in our room and Kaito panicked and told Arven straight out.”

Ah, Katio…

Dr. Mariah kept herself professional, keeping most of the disappointment off her features as she said, “I see. That is quite the violation of trust. Especially to tell someone you specifically asked him not to reveal something that vulnerable about yourself. I can see how situations like that would start developing into feeling panicked and out of control.”

Dr. Mariah knew what it would mean to Kaito… but. She had been sincere with Doppio before. When he was her patient, in their therapy sessions, he was the top priority. So, knowing this, she said, “Doppio, this relationship might be unsalvageable, past that point. Especially considering your difficult situation in this moment, fostering inside the castle while your previous life is actively deconstructing, it would be understandable, and feasible, to request to be separated from Kaito. I am aware of Kaito’s sense of duty, and how somewhat overwhelming that sense can be… but legally, we can make him stop. He does not need to be such an influence on your life, especially if you find yourself unable to trust him.”

“That was one of the worst things, other than reporting me to CPS in the first place, but…that’s all it’s been since we’ve met,” Doppio huffed. “He’s nice to me, or does something good, and I end up telling him something personal, and he gives…hit or miss advice, and then he tells everyone and it blows up. Over and over.”

He glanced up, giving Dr. Mariah a dull, defeated look. “...his father-in-law is, like, my ultimate legal guardian. He literally walked Arven to his desk this morning, and I’m not totally convinced he’s not just sitting across the street right now waiting for this appointment to be over. He told me straight out that even if they’ll never legally let him have me, I’m his and I can’t stop it.”

Doppio huffed, rubbing an eye. “...I told him that was power-tripping bullshit, but…even as much as he’s ruined my life, it feels like more trouble than it’s worth trying to fight it…” His expression dulled again. “...as much as he’s ruined my life, I don’t wanna ruin his. S’why I threatened that fake CPS lady.”

Ah, Kaito.

The truth was, Kaito just had some… skewed ideas of what it meant to be responsible for someone. Dr. Mariah knew that, and she could even imagine his bright, hopeful face that he was performing well, as he said or did all of those things…

But hearing them said plainly, from Doppio’s frustrated perspective, was a somewhat stark reminder that Kaito had been taught what love was by mainly abusers. And, again, while it would hurt Kaito… Doppio was the priority.

“Especially if you explained it like that, in that series of events, I think if you went to King Ouma, the boss would be the first to ensure that Kaito could not force his presence or influence onto you, regardless of how he feels about it.” Dr. Mariah said pointedly, “It’s important, Doppio, that you don’t feel helpless to what others decide to do. And it’s not something you’d have to fight on your own, if Kaito made it a fight. King Ouma is your legal guardian: he has to prioritize your needs. His son-in-law does not supercede those responsibilities, and the only way they could is if you never push against them.”

“And Kaito is a strong man by many rights. I don’t think you could truly ruin his life if you tried.” Dr. Mariah said honestly. She was fairly confident the only form of destruction Kaito would truly buckle under would be the loss of his immediate family. Everything else was extra. She knew this because she had listened to how everything else in his life had exploded already, and while it had left huge mental scars on him… otherwise, Kaito had recovered. “It is not your responsibility to keep comfortable those who would harm you in the process of improving your life. Your priority should be your own wellbeing and safety, before you can start worrying for others around you.”

“...you had to threaten a CPS agent to protect Kaito?” Dr. Mariah asked, both because it might be relevant to Doppio feeling an unnecessary protective instinct towards Kaito, but also because?? Why?? “Could I ask what happened?”

…maybe, but…that’d be kind of awkward, wouldn’t it? Doppio didn’t really know how Kaito’s relationship with Aiichi Ouma was, but…that would suck. Having to, potentially, enact a restraining order against your son-in-law for a child in your custody? It’d make dinners tense, at the least…

Doppio just kind of shrugged, already resigned despite the fight Dr. Mariah was describing…though he winced at a point she brought up. It wasn’t his responsibility to keep comfortable those who would harm him in the process of improving his life…huh. “...people do keep saying that…” he muttered.

Heaving a sigh, Doppio nodded, readying himself to explain all that. “The agent was…most probably paid off by my boss, but definitely paid off by someone, and while it was confusing, that…worked out for me. But she wasn’t just going to stop at saying that I wasn’t being abused and just…build the report around that.”

Doppio frowned, looking down. “...she said that Kaito had a psychiatric history of delusions and hallucinations, and that she’d build the report around discrediting him as a witness, not just for me but…point blank. Suggesting that his therapists look into a psychosis diagnosis. And then she asked me how much Arven knew and…” Doppio grit his teeth a little. “...I-I couldn’t…”

Kaito, technically, already had a psychosis diagnosis, though it was for depressive psychosis. And as a medical professional, Dr. Mariah couldn’t help but feel the desire to scoff at the idea that such a diagnosis would automatically make Kaito’s testimony unreliable. Verifiable, surely, but not entirely dismissed without further investigation into it. The only way a diagnosis would get Kaito’s accusations of abuse entirely dismissed without investigation would be if, theoretically, it was a long established recurring pattern he had of randomly accusing people of abuse. 

And even then, it’d be iffy. No one would want to leave someone to their fate on the basis of the person who finally noticed ‘crying wolf’. 

That was the medical side of her. The side of her that had lived a long time and observed the fallible people around her also knew that the CPA agents plan wasn’t entirely baseless. People did have a gut-instinct of dismissing those with mental illness as being unable to report the reality of things they were capable of recognizing. Very much a ‘if you can’t be trusted on this one thing, you can’t be trusted on anything’ fallacy. It was foolish, but, well, so were people. Kaito’s mental reliability being openly poked and derided could have resulted in people accepting his report as false out of hand.

But, ultimately, that was all ‘Kaito’ issues. It didn’t matter, as far as helping Doppio. And seeing the wince on his face as he talked about Arven…

“Arven means quite a great deal to you.” Dr. Mariah noticed, “I imagine seeing him threatened has been alarming. Let’s talk about that a little. Tell me about Arven.”

Doppio nodded emphatically before smiling softly. A little nervous, a little bashful, but quite affectionate. “Um…I think you might’ve gathered as much, but…he’s my boyfriend. He’s super smart and really intuitive, just in general, but about magic stuff too. He went on this huge trek across Dicea last year to, uh, find the remains of titans? To find these special herbs that grow from ‘em, to save his dog, Chief… Apparently no one really knows about the herbs, or don’t believe in them, but…Arven did, and he found them. All on his own, and…he saved Chief’s life…”

Doppio’s expression was soft and awed as he talked. “He’s really brave, and he’ll throw all of himself into something if he believes in it. And he’s…passionate, you know? Really sweet and caring… The second day we met, he just…immediately stood up to some jerks that were messing with me and…and when I told him about my memory issues he…heh,” Doppio giggled softly, that same smitten sound as his cheeks went pink, “He asked if he could write in my notebook, and he just…wrote down stuff about himself, and that we were friends, ‘cause I forget stuff like that and…he didn’t want to be forgotten.”

“He’s a really good cook too, though he always talks like my food is something incredible.” Doppio grinned bashfully, hiding behind his bangs a bit. “It’s really flattering, to be honest. I really like cooking with him, but I’d be happy to cook for him every day until forever, whatever he wants.”

Dr. Mariah smiled lightly, “It sounds like you two are off to a good start then. Have you ever found yourself having a panic attack around Arven, though? Do you confide in him the same way you do Kaito?”

Doppio’s smile faded, but it was into a contemplative look, rather than a frown. “...I do, except for the, yanno, scary thoughts thing… But, no? I mean…I’ve felt panicked, and I’ve definitely cried really dumbly into him, but…I don’t think I’ve had a panic attack around him, no. He’s…really understanding and…”

Doppio cut himself off, his brows furrowing. “...I don’t count the gear as a panic attack. I think that can count as something separate. …e-even if the healers said later it was just a panic attack…”

“Ah, the gear,” Dr. Mariah said, adjusting herself on the seat, bringing up her hands together in front of her face as she peered at Doppio from above her knuckles, “You’ve mentioned that a few times now. Why don’t we talk about the gear? When you brought up your scenario with Kaito, your first instinct was to worry he would ‘find the gear’ and invent an outrageous story behind it before you had a chance to explain. It sounds like you have anxiety about what ‘the gear’ might say about you. Could you walk me through it?”

Doppio…paled a little, shifting as he looked distinctly uncomfortable, lifting his arms to get behind Amaina and hug around his middle. …it…should be alright… Dr. Mariah wasn’t human either, so…

“...after that thing with the fake CPS agent… I-I told Arven that…Kaito…wasn’t totally full of shit about what he reported, and, um…” Doppio huffed out a shaky breath. “...and we were kinda freaking out because…didn’t know what to do, ‘n…all that… And it started getting hard to breathe, like with a panic attack, but…not? I was, uh…choking.”

Shifting uncomfortably, Doppio’s voice started getting a little pitchy with nerves. “I-I don’t really remember it, but…Maki started taking me to the medical wing in the castle, but I…um… I…vomited up a gear. Like…this big,” Doppio held his hands up, indicating, vaguely, about a four inch circle before returning to his self-hug, “And it was covered in…stuff. And, uh…”

He glanced up, an edging on hysterical giggle escaping his chest. “E-even varied, humans don’t cough up gears. And I freaked out when she showed it to me. …sh-she recently gave it back to me, and…I don’t really know what to do with it.”

Amaina was now curiously looking back up and at Doppio, no longer being cuddled and feeling only a little salty about it. Especially when he seemed to need a hug more than ever! Sigh, such high maintenance, honestly.

Dr. Mariah watched Amaina give a dramatic sigh, before standing up and moving towards Doppio’s stomach, hopping onto his arms and flumping her whole little body against him. Coo’ing little musical sounds at him as she petted him. 

“I ask this knowing all the reasons why a person would be alarmed, vomiting a piece of machinery,” Dr. Mariah said, “But that still leaves me needing to know specifically: why such a visceral reaction, to the gear? What about it specifically upsets you so badly?”

Doppio closed his eyes for a moment, taking a breath and bringing up a hand to hold Amaina back. And…the question seemed kinda dumb, to him, but…

“...means I’m not human…” Doppio said softly, his voice strangled. “...’n I know ‘Maina ‘n Arven keep…telling me I can be human too, ‘n that I’m real, ‘n it…” An upset squeak escaped Doppio’s throat as he brought his legs up, curling into a ball. 

“...just…feels like there’s something wrong with me…”

“Hmmm…” Dr. Mariah hummed, not unsympathetically. Observing Doppio curl up, the strain of it getting to him. To push or to break, to push or to break…

“Why don’t we take a break?” She asked, “Would you like five minutes, Doppio? Time to walk away from a subject can help with managing your emotions about it, come back to it with a cleared head. We don’t have to, if you want to refuse, but I would recommend a break at this point. I could show you where we make tea around here.”

She paused, before offering, “Or you may take a look at my other fish.”

Doppio took a shaky breath, pressing a sleeve to his eyes. So stupid… Useless piece of…garbage… No wonder Boss doesn’t want you, can’t be anything, not even just filled space…

Forcibly uncurling himself, Doppio nodded stiffly, holding Amaina with one arm. “...m pretty good at making tea. Would you like some?”

“Yes, please.” Dr. Mariah said, as she stood up, “Let me show you where the kitchen is.”

It was the same process she used with Kaito. She wondered if either of them would be surprised by that. Doppio might not entirely understand, and Kaito might decide he understands too well. But when they were overwhelmed, the quickest way to stabilize them seemed to always be to set them up for a task. Something small and useful and easy and quick to achieve.

Dr. Mariah had recognized the trait in Doppio right from the beginning, as she showed him the kitchen, stepping back to let him work out what he was going to do next as Amaina cheerfully buzzed around his head, offering outlandish suggestions of what to add to the tea, like salt or ketchup. There was a reason she had asked him to setup the wood before she had shown off her ability to set it on fire. He had been nervous around her, and she needed him to feel more secure. More in control of the situation. More at ease with how she, specifically, might perceive him.

That was where Kaito would get it wrong. He would assume he and Doppio were the same because they both wanted to be useful. Incorrect. What those who tried to ease their nerves by completing useful tasks sometimes did, and what Kaito specifically, and she believed Doppio also, did, was try to soothe the tempers of those around them– perceived or otherwise– by appearing useful and, well… it was an unkind word, but ‘obedient’. 

Dr. Mariah knew she was cheating, but she knew quite a bit about the type of abuse Doppio had faced now already, by helping Kaito cope with seeing it reflect back onto himself. Probably quite a few of the methods she used to calm Kaito would help Doppio. She’d try those first.

It was easier to breathe in the kitchen. Once Dr. Mariah gave him an overview, and Doppio could judge that she hadn’t just wanted him to walk with her, it was like…well, a fish taking to water. Even having never been there before, there was a fluid ease to Doppio’s movements as he filled the stovetop kettle and set it to boil, carefully taking out and preparing a--rather elegant--tea set, smiling a little seeing a box of white tea, but selecting a peppermint instead. Still a calming blend, but a punchy enough flavor for a morning tea, not something better suited to evening and getting ready for bed. 

Almost thoughtlessly, Doppio moved over, looking for something to clean…and he frowned slightly when there was nothing there. Just the rest of a clean, orderly kitchen. 

…there hadn’t been a lot for him to clean lately. He hadn’t been able to convince anyone to let him go into the main kitchens and clean their dishes when he and Arven ate with the rest of the castle, there was no general household cleaning for him to do, and just changing out their sheets or bringing up the laundry was…barely anything. And Arven didn’t really leave things around for him to tidy after him so…

For a moment, Doppio just…stood there. Unsure about what he should be doing, with nothing demanded of him. 

Dr. Mariah watched as Doppio seemed to just sort of… stall. Finishing setting up the tea to boil, looking around, and then just going still. Like a windup toy at the end of its curl… 

“...Doppio–”

OmO

OoO Ahhhhhhhhh I’m booooooored can we do something fun instead?

Amaina, with a whine and a whimper, flew into Doppio’s face, gave him a pouty look, before notably pulling in her wings, letting herself fall, fully expecting to be caught.

“Gah!” Exactly in line with Amaina’s expectations, Doppio cupped his hands at his chest, quickly catching his little angel. “A-angioletto, I don’t really think…therapy’s supposed to be…um, thrilling? Um…”

Doppio furrowed his brows as he looked around, thinking. Giving Dr. Mariah a sheepish side-eye. “...um… Is your living in thoughts thing…too boring for, like, Red Light, Green Light? That…that could be fun! While the water boils… Right?”

Yes! Maaaariiiiiaaaaaah you will go first, Amaina decided, pointing dramatically at the doctor, who observed this calmly, Red Light Green Light us Imma ‘bout to SMOKE this guy! 

“I do prefer ‘Dr.’ Mariah, Amaina. It helps remind people I am not, in fact, a child.” Dr. Mariah explained, “But very well. It won’t take terribly long, considering the size of the room. Do try not to cheat.”

OoO how dare! 

OvO there is no try, only do

“How distinctly nonreassuring.” Dr. Mariah said plainly, “Very well. The first person to touch my shoulder wins. Start at the stove. Wait on my signal…”

OvO you going down, pretty boy, Amaina promised, flying out of Doppio’s hands and hovering beside him.

…Doppio wouldn’t just straight up let Amaina win, because she’d likely know and then get pissed about it, because no one liked to be handed a win…but he hadn’t really felt a driving force to put in his all to win. …but the more Amaina trash-talked, and especially with Dr. Mariah telling Amaina not to cheat…

Hm.

Giving Amaina a wobbly smile, Doppio took his spot by the stove and got ready. “La vittoria è il sentiero di una foglia, angioletto.” (Victory is a leaf’s path, little angel)

“Green Light—”

O=O—--------- * --------------------------- * -----------------------------------*

“--Red light!” Dr. Mariah said immediately, watching with some amusement as Amaina flash teleported to three different spots, each short jump accompanied by a small, likely entirely theatrical spark of light. She wondered if the extremely short jumps were a conscious choice in the construct, or just how her internal logic worked, as both her and Doppio froze, “Amaina, teleportings cheating. Just fly.” 

OoO who said I was teleporting maybe I’m just THAT FAST

“Uh huh. No teleporting. Now, steady…. Annnnnnd… Green ligh–”

It was a little difficult to actually run in the small kitchen, but Doppio thought he put in a good effort, getting a good few steps in while the light was ‘green’...though he pouted a little at Amaina, poorly hiding the amused smile twitching at his lips. “You’re faster than thought, Amaina, you don’t need to teleport.”

…and maybe that was a little mean to say, considering…

“Green ligh–”

“T”

Doppio felt that swelling feeling in his chest and under his hands as he…purposefully stopped time, still something nervous and terrified in him about what he was doing, but…he was choosing to ignore that. Just smirking a little to himself. 

…okay, he could look around, so…it made sense that he could…

Doppio’s eyes widened as he could feel himself being able to move…but it felt weird. Like…he was moving through stiff taffy, or--

It would seem, to Amaina and Mariah, even faster than a blink, that Doppio was faceplanted on the ground, limbs splayed out like he’d tripped, groaning softly. 

“--ight, oh! Doppio?” 

HA HA HA I WIN GET BENT teeeeeeeeeeeheee~ Amaina giggled, clearly smug as she teleported a few more beats, before cheerfully smacking at Dr. Mariah’s shoulder. 

Dr. Mariah ignored this, quickly hurrying to kneel down next to Doppio, looking him over, tasting the air… if he was in debilitating pain, his emotions were not’ reflecting that. He tasted more embarrassed than anything. She placed a careful, gently hand on his back… before asking, “Had a bit of a spill, I see? Are you alright?”

-_- he is not he is shamed because I am just so fast

OvO that was fun we should do it again soon if you’re not dead Doppio which you’re noooooot so get up~

“Let’s be slow to rise, make certain nothing’s twisted out of place.” Dr. Mariah cautioned. “...that was quite a thing you just did, Doppio. If I can believe my own eyes, which I do.”

Doppio sighed, slowly raising his head and rubbing his sore, reddened nose…though that was a little hard to tell, considering how flushed the rest of his face had become. “I-I’m okay, sorry…”

Slowly rolling onto his side and sitting up, Doppio rubbed his shoulder with a small, unconcerned wince next before giving Dr. Mariah an embarrassed look. “...um…well… You did say no cheating so…think I probably deserved that…”

Dr. Mariah considered him, looking him over for injuries, before staring him in the eye. Tasting the air… and more confirming than asking, “You used your ability willfully? Not out of stress for the race?”

Doppio turned a deeper shade of scarlet before nodding. Mumbling, “...thought it’d be funny…”

“...good.” Dr. Mariah said, standing up and brushing off her dress, before turning to Amaina, “Perhaps you will make a decent mentor for him after all. I’d still prefer someone who understands his abilities were more involved, but… guidance and inspiration to use said abilities? Yes, it seems you might do well.”

Then, glancing at the stove, she said curtly, “Doppio, the water’s going to start screaming in a moment. Do take care of it, and we’ll get back to work.”

Doppio blinked at Dr. Mariah in surprise before looking down, brushing himself off though there wasn’t much from the floor to brush off in the first place. …she wasn’t responsible for him, so he didn’t really know why… But he’d really half expected her to…he didn’t know. Be disappointed. Give some warning about using his abilities responsibly. 

(...he really didn’t know why that was what he expected. Boss wouldn’t have done that.)

(...but maybe it was just…the expectation of being reprimanded for…anything. And that was just the explanation why he was able to come up with.)

“Oh, shoot!” Doppio exclaimed softly, popping up from the floor with a small wobble before righting himself and heading back to the stove. “I’m on it, sorry!”

Turning off the stove, he carefully poured the boiling water into the teapot, judging it to be about three or four cupfuls (perhaps overkill for the time he had left in the session, but plenty for Dr. Mariah to have about as many cups as she wanted, reasonably) before he gently agitated the tea leaves, making sure they were steeped before he put the lid back on. Pouring out the remaining water from the kettle to disincentivise bacteria growth and…okay here were the trays…

Soon enough, Doppio was following Dr. Mariah back to her office, face set in concentration, making sure he wasn’t going to drop the tea tray.

Dr. Mariah sat down at her chair, waiting patiently for Doppio to hand her a cup, which she accepts with a small thank you. Taking a moment to sip at it, she nods, “Perfectly done. Thank you again, Doppio.”

Taking another sip, she placed the cup down on her lap, before considering him again, “I believe a certain style of socializing, might help you with your fears about the gear, and perhaps a number of your other anxieties as well.”

“You recall what I told you in our audition session, yes?” Dr. Mariah asked, sipping at her tea again, “Your situation is not unique. You are not the only young man dealing with growing pains or the mortifying ordeal of being unusual, in some way. It’s something all young people go through, in some way, shape or form. And I think being around others your own age would help you cope with that.”

Doppio beamed at the compliment, something light and happy to him as he poured his own cup and settled back on the plush chair. His work pleasing someone, just as it should. Not quite the world back as it should be…but close. 

That brightness dimmed back down as he sighed, though, taking a small sip from his cup. “...Kaito has been trying to nudge me into going to Arven’s school. I don’t know if I really want to, though… From what I’ve seen, and how Arven describes it, it sounds like a nightmare,” Doppio grimaced. 

…before, slowly, a thoughtful, puzzled look crossed over his face. 

“School is very much a ‘mixed bag’ when it comes to possibilities of socialization. And there are other ways…” Dr. Mariah trailed off, tasting something in the air, “Did you have another thought about how you could go about it?”

Doppio blinked, before he shook his head. “Um, no… I just…” He sighed. “...this is gonna sound kinda dumb for me, but… Look, I know I forget people all the time…but if I have met someone before, I at least, like…usually have the impression that I know them from somewhere. Or that we’ve met before, even if I can’t remember it.”

Doppio’s eyes narrowed as he tilted his head thoughtfully. “...there’s a girl in Arven’s class I saw today… I dunno. I’m pretty sure we’ve never met, but…she looks really familiar…”

“Perhaps it’s how you said, then. Perhaps you knew her once and forgot.” Dr. Mariah said, settling back into her advise, “There are other ways to socialize with children your own age, or perceived age, without necessarily needing to go to school. And school can still facilitate it. The local education facilities host things like events and clubs that are open even to teenagers who are not enrolled in their classes. There are quite a few Diceans, as you may already know, who prefer to homeschool for a variety of reasons, but these open events still allow for much needed socialization skills. That could be your way into more regularly interacting with people going through what you are going through, Doppio.”

“Along with that, there are group therapy sessions that are held for teenagers in criss situations. Usually ones who have experienced some sort of trauma, recently… I could recommend you one, Doppio. If you find yourself wanting to discuss the difficulties of your home life with those who might relate.”

…maybe… But it really didn’t feel like that… 

Doppio didn’t look much enthused with non-school, school-hosted events and clubs…but those did seem better than going to school plainly. If it came down to it, he could try those… Maybe there was something like Kaito’s cooking class, Doppio hadn’t minded the idea of sitting in on those more often. And while he didn’t think he was much of a beginner cook, it’d be foolish to think that there weren’t any basics that wouldn’t be of use to him. 

…unlike…

Doppio’s mouth twisted in mild displeasure, and it was only barely that he kept himself from rolling his eyes. “...maybe at some point it’d be kinda fun to talk about how annoying CPS is with other people who’ve been through it…but I don’t really feel a need to right now. And…I dunno. I feel better complaining about Kaito to you, since you know him already and all that, but…”

Doppio sighed. “...his reputation already sucks, and I don’t wanna make it worse for a bunch of teens just ‘cause I have a personal problem with him. It’s kinda hard insisting that he’s just infuriatingly nosy, and not that he’s some mindless bloodthirsty brute, when people already wanna believe the latter.”

…hm.

Doppio was not ready to talk about his experience with ‘the boss’.

 Not even in theory.

The fact that he assumed he’d be talking about CPS or Kaito– and Mariah hadn’t missed again Doppio feeling protective over Kaito’s reputation– without even bringing up the possibility of discussing anything in his homelife prior to them was…well. It showed how much farther they had to go with that. Dr. Mariah wasn’t even going to try to start unpacking that today. She still needed to establish more trust with Doppio before he would let her into that part of his world, she felt fairly confident.

She wondered, idly, what Kaito had actually done to get to that point, with Doppio. She supposed she already knew he was good at digging into certain types of personalities and traumas. The three people closest to him were, each in their own ways, some of the most emotionally guarded people Dr. Mariah had ever met. And he had gotten through to them long before they had all started therapy.

It really was a shame, that Kaito and Doppio hadn’t been able to maintain that level of trust, in comparison to the reality of Doppio’s situation and what Kaito had felt like he had to do. Doppio needed someone he could confide in. Hopefully Arven was at least partially relieving some of that tension in him.

“Those sessions would still give you the opportunity to hear others stories too, not just speak of your own.” She reminded him, “It could show you how others are coping with similar stressers, or express how your feelings are not as isolated as you might believe. But overall, I still believe socialization may be a good move for you, moving forward.”

Tapping at her cup, she said, “I cannot actually force you to do anything, Doppio. That is not our relationship. I can only ask questions, offer advise, and most importantly, listen. But. Some of that advise I like to offer as ‘homework assignments’. Ones you can choose yourself to try or not. You never have to do them.”

“Between this session and our next one, I would like you to, as a homework assignment, try sitting in on one school event. You do not have to participate, I just want you to rip off the bandaid of going to an event and seeing what it is like. Do you think you’d be up to that assignment?”

…it felt kinda rude, so he didn’t say anything, but…

…he didn’t really care what struggles other people were going through. If they were getting help, and learning to cope better, he was happy for them in a vague, nebulous, conceptual way, he supposed…but so what? There were millions of people dealing with all sorts of things in the world. Doppio didn’t really feel a need to meet any of them. 

But it didn’t seem disastrous to try it so…something on the table, he supposed. 

Nodding slightly along--he remembered that part from the pamphlets, about how Dr. Mariah couldn’t actually force him to do anything--Doppio made to nod again, before looking unsure. “...I…suppose it…might be like, a…comfort zone crutch thing? But…would I have to go on my own? Or could I go to something with Arven?”

“Yes, you can bring Arven–”

And me!

“And Amaina, and anyone else if it helps,” Dr. Mariah said, “It’s just meant to be a way to demystify the process to you. Make it easier to do for yourself, in the future, should it come to that. How do you feel about that? Do you think you could try it?”

Doppio let out a little relieved breath. “I could do that, yeah. Guess I’ll ask him if he heard about anything interesting today…”

He blinked, before turning pink, glancing up with an unsure look. “...it’s not…that weird for people in a relationship to hang out a-and it not be a date, right? And not like, just, normal hanging out, but…something planned, I mean.”

Dr. Mariah nodded, “There’s nothing weird in that at all, no. Many couples go to planned events without specifying they’re dates. In fact, planned events are more often than not, not dates.”

That said, she tilted her head a little, catching the insecurity in his tone, “Are you having some anxiety, on the idea of going on a date, Doppio?”

Making a relieved humming noise, Doppio nodded, before glancing up at Dr. Mariah with some alarm, like he’d been caught doing something. And, looking around, he half-heartedly shrugged. “...I mean… I’d…like to go on a date with Arven… It just… I-I wasn’t thinking about it that way, and it was…confusing, when Prince Kokichi called it that and…Arven said it was fine that it could just be a hang out this time, a-and we could go on a date next time…”

“It’s alright, to not feel ready for that step in your relationship.” Dr. Mariah said, her tone gentle, “Labels like ‘boyfriends’ and ‘couples’ can be strange, stifling things sometimes. If you feel some pressure or implication that you should be fully ready to ‘date’, just because you’ve found yourself enjoying someone’s company to the point of claiming a label like that, then just know that such a implication is merely a myth. If you are not ready to date, then you do not have too.”

“But, with that said,” Dr. Mariah said, taking another sip of tea, “Explain your thought process to me. What was confusing about Prince Kokichi’s assessment?”

A confused look passed over Doppio’s face. “...that feels weird though, ‘cause…” He blushed deeply, glancing around as he lowered his voice. “...I don’t…really feel intimidated or anything, um…being…physically intimate. I think Arven’s way more nervous than me about it. But…”

He sighed, running his thumb down the height of his cup. “...I don’t know. We’ve, um…been planning to go to a cafe together for a few days, but the princes ‘n healers didn’t really want us going out since we were injured. ‘N Prince Kokichi just…made some comment about…making sure we could have our date? And…I dunno. It was like I just…stopped thinking, after that.”

Glancing down, Doppio rocked his heels on the ground a bit. “...I dunno. It just… I felt unprepared. Like I…needed more warning? Maybe… To call something a date.”

Dr. Mariah made a mental note on physical intimacy– that would likely come up as its own conversation, someday– before she nodded, unsurprised and most importantly, unconcerned, “Especially to hear it from a third, unrelated party? It’s entirely understandable that you would want to shy away from their assessments, wait until you’ve had time to think about what you want on your own. Discuss it with Arven, as a strong and very close second. It should never be something someone else decides for you.”

“And while there is still no pressure to do so,” Dr. Mariah stressed, “Have you and Arven discussed potentially setting up a date in the future? Or what a ‘date’ might look like to both of you?”

The relief returned, and Doppio took a drink from his tea. Considering how crazy everything was, he didn’t really feel a need to…compare his relationship with Arven to any sort of outside standard, but…well. If something felt daunting, then it was probably worth having a conversation about. And the only comparison Doppio cared about was making sure he and Arven knew where the other person was, emotionally. 

Shaking his head, Doppio smiled softly. “No… We’ve mostly just been anticipating this cafe trip.” Getting a little excited, Doppio perked up. “We’re gonna have honey-brick toast! I’ve never had it before, and I’ve always wanted to try it, a-and Arven said he’s a big fan so…it’s something we’ve been looking forward to. And…uh, honestly?”

He gave her a sheepish look. “...exactly what we’re doing might be a date one day? We did talk about making it more of an event, like…with more importance put upon it, when we go on a date, which…to me is kinda what differentiates something as a date, but…I just…felt rushed, declaring that this was gonna be a date? I dunno…”

Calming again, Doppio tenderly rubbed his nose. “...I just like spending time with him. Whatever we call it, or whatever we’re doing.”

O.O

OoO He’s got it baaaaaad for the bootie

“It seems like it, yes.” Dr. Mariah agreed without missing a beat, though the small, playful smile on her face relayed it as a joke, “If you two have already talked about it, then it seems you are on the right track. I think that’s exactly how you all should develop the relationship as you go. Communicate, be honest in that communication, be patient. And it sounds like that’s what you’re already doing.”

Glancing at the clock, Dr. Mariah asked, “Now, we will be seeing each other again soon. But, we still have a little bit of time left, so… is there anything we haven’t gotten to, Doppio, that you were hoping we might talk about? Anything specifically on your mind? Now is the time to bring it up. And don’t forget, these sessions are for your benefit. It’s okay to request we talk about something with a purely selfish or self-centered goal in mind.”

Doppio flushed red, making a sort of gargled noise as he covered his face, though he soon sighed. Of everything? Arven was the best part in every single way. The only good new thing that actually felt and remained good. While some aspects could make him nervous…his relationship with Arven wasn’t something that stressed Doppio out--quite the opposite, actually.

…and, if for once, someone was telling him that what he was doing wasn’t bad, actually? Doppio would take it. 

As Dr. Mariah opened the floor for anything else, Doppio blanked out for a sec, trying to think of…anything. But unlike many times where he had all of the universe to choose from…there was something right in front of him. 

And…his grip anxiously tightening around his teacup, Doppio’s lip found its way between his teeth as he looked up, giving Dr. Mariah a strained look. “...right before I came in…um. Apparently…my boss has been arrested. P-peacefully. And…he confessed to stuff…”

Doppio’s gaze fell again. “...I want to go see him.”

Dr. Mariah settled back, “I see. That is quite the thing to hear, especially just before a therapy appointment. I could understand if that’s been on your mind since we’ve begun, I’m sorry we didn’t get to it sooner.”

Kaito had walked him, correct? So Kaito had told him the news then. Doppio was correct, it seemed big information tended to come from Kaito. And Dr. Mariah didn’t think it was a coincidence that he had waited till just before Doppio was coming to see her to bring it up. She supposed she appreciated his faith in her.

“What are you hoping might happen?” Dr. Mariah asked, “What would be the goal of seeing him?”

Doppio shook his head a little. “It’s okay. There was a lot to talk about.”

But now that they were actually getting to it… Doppio mouthed a few unsaid words before his expression settled into something worried and strained…and terribly hopeful. “...I just…want to know if he’s okay. I know that people in custody shouldn’t be mistreated but…I know I’m going to keep thinking about it until I can talk to him myself…o-or someone can just…tell me straight out.”

With a small, defeated sigh, Doppio closed his eyes. “...I know there’s…no point in apologizing… And…and I don’t think… I miss him, but…seeing him won’t…change that. There’s not much of a point to seeing him…but I want to. At least…I just want to see that he’s okay…”

“Clarify for me, Doppio,” Dr. Mariah said gently, “You stuttered and faded out a bit… did you say you don’t think you miss him? Or that you miss him, and what you don’t think faded off before you could continue the thought?”

“S-sorry,” Doppio stuttered, taking a breath. “No, I…I miss him. I miss him all the time…more than anything. I just…know that that doesn’t mean anything. And seeing him won’t mean anything. …but I just…”

His lips wavered for a moment. “...Kaito said for stuff like this…the best thing we can do is just…not cry too loudly, while people actually get stuff done.”

Dr. Mariah’s eyes widened, ever so slightly… before reaching over and tapping at her journal. A line added to Kaito’s section. 

It was cheating, but, well. 

But for Doppio, she said softly, “The fact that you miss him does mean something, so long as it means something to you. No one is allowed to tell you how important your pain is, Doppio. And if they do, you can consider the sentiment suspect. You missing him, or wanting to check on him, or confirm he’s alright, is not irrelevant. It matters, because you matter.”

“That said, you matter in many ways.” She added, “Which makes situations like this tricky. This man has done you quite a bit of harm, Doppio, and further interactions could create further harm. That matters as well. Though, his ability to harm you in any meaningful way is limited by his current position… you said he confessed and accepted his arrest peacefully? How do you feel about that? Is that surprising?”

At first, Doppio just shrugged a little, something dull in his eyes. His pain was…irrelevant. It had always been. As long as he got the job done, that was what mattered, and…it didn’t matter how beaten, bloody, or broken he was as long as he crossed the finish line. 

…but Boss had never thought that way. Always telling him to be more careful and to value himself more…because Boss valued him, and Doppio couldn’t treat something Boss valued so poorly. Going out of his way to treat his wounds, making sure that it was a lesson learned. 

…and Kaito didn’t think that way. And Arven didn’t think that way. 

…but even with all that…Doppio still couldn’t really believe it. Results were what mattered. It didn’t matter how you got there. 

(...perhaps that was something to think on.)

Doppio grimaced a bit as Dr. Mariah just…talked about how Boss had harmed him, but…

“...it is,” Doppio said softly. “It’s…not what I would’ve expected from Boss at all… But whatever he’s chosen to do, to deal with all this…I know he has a plan for it. He always does. So…I’ll believe in him, whatever it looks like.”

“Is there no possibility that perhaps he surrendered himself out of regret for what he had done?” Dr. Mariah asked softly.

O.O

OoO no

And as she said that, the walls started to drip. Long lines of clear water, dripping down the walls, starting at the ceiling corners before growing stronger in their gushes–

“That’s enough now, Amaina.” Dr. Mariah said, “You will s t o p.”

And with that, the water stopped… and Amaina, briefly, flickered. Looking a little lost and confused every time she flickered, each flicker making her a different color, a different outfit, her face, briefly, something monstrous and strange… before she flickered back to normal, looking incredibly dizzy, stumbling around Doppio’s lap before flopping down onto it. . @_@ Ow.

Dr. Mariah frowned, “Ah, my apologies. It did not occur to me that a construct’s power ties to its existence. I will not do that again. But that is the sort of interruption to therapy I cannot abide without comment, Amaina.”

Doppio shrugged. “Boss doesn’t believe in regrets.”

And while Amaina’s point was, er…poignant…

Doppio’s eyes widened in panic as Amaina started to…flicker. And jolt. And Doppio’s hands hovered around her unsurely, not sure what was happening as, in a small, frightened voice, he called out, “A-Amaina?!”

Ever so gently, he scooped her into his hands, looking over her now stabilized form with worry…before he slowly looked up at Dr. Mariah. Something hard in his expression, before he said quietly, “...please don’t,” before he returned his worried attention to his small friend, just…not sure what to do to help someone that…didn’t have a physical form. 

…she said she’d given him POWER before, to help when everything had hurt. How could…

(Across the city, a young philosopher had been contemplating the same thing. It was difficult to measure, in this universe, but for all their differences, one of the constants Runia’s angels had observed was that Tulpa, when reacting to certain stimulus, put out energy. An impossibility, according to all laws of conservation, but what were Tulpa, if not impossibilities brought to life?)

(It had taken millenia of work to find a way to harness that energy in any way.)

(But given a non-physical conduit? And a Tulpa making a wish?)

Doppio’s lips trembled as he held Amaina close, just…wishing he could help.

Amaina’s eyes widened.

P O W E R

It coursed through her, something stronger than she had ever felt before. Like a pipe that had always run through it hot water suddenly filled to bursting with magma. So much that she would either have to swallow it down and make it a part of her, or breath it out and make it a part of everyone she was currently connected to.

She was currently connected to three people. Doppio, Dr. Mariah, and of course, Miku-senpai. Miku, who was currently trying to strum out a song, looking a little a disappointed as she played with the chords of her guitar, while her fellow bandmates talked and hung out around her. 

And then in that moment, something filled her up. It was like her mind had perfect clarity, and her fingers more dexterous than they had ever felt, and her muscles more powerful than she could have ever trained them to be, as she suddenly stood up and, knowing exactly how she’d do it, made the guitar wail. A strange heat coming off of her as her bandmates looked back at her, stunned, as she leaned forward, and with an intensity she had never displayed before, started to scream.

“WISH I MAY, WISH I MIGHT

HAVE THIS I WISH TONIGHT

ARE YOU SATISFIED?!”

And as Miku sang and played the song, screaming it throughout the band practice stage they had set up, her bandmates quickly hurried to their instruments, doing their best to keep up with her, improving to this strange new sound they had never heard before.

And it seemed like that sound echoed back to and through Amaina, who suddenly sat up in Doppio’s lap and, still needing somewhere to put the rest of that P OW E R– she couldn’t swallow it, it would change something fundamental in her, she wasn’t ready for it– she looked to Dr. Mariah, and then through Dr. Mariah, before fluttering over to her, staring her in the face, each strum of guitar and heavy drum beat coming off her like a shimmer, visible echo.

Dr. Mariah watched, the only sign of tension in her a gripping of her fists, as Amian sang at her, ALL THE WANTS YOU WASTE/ALL THE THINGS YOU’VE CHASED–

Dr. Mariah could feel where in her mind Amaina was looking at. She narrowed her eyes, slightly. That was literally impossible… and if it wasn’t, she wasn’t sure if she was ready either. If this was something she could accept. 

But someone had to swallow it. And Amaina seemed determined to let her do it, as Amaina, briefly, was  someone else. Or, if Miku had been there to see it, she was Amaina again. Amaina truly. The same bright, intelligent eyes, the fierce smile, the long light blue hair, as a girl on the edge of being a woman reached out to Dr. Mariah, a woman always on the edge of being a girl, and placed a small kiss against her.

I WANT THAT STAR/ I WANT IT NOW/ I WANT IT ALL/ AND I DON’T CARE HOW

CAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH/ YOU MAY REGRET IT/ CAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH

YOU MAY GET IT

And there was a sudden, almost anti-climatic little poof, as Amaina plopped back into her regular construct size, falling down and being caught by Dr. Mariah, Who peered down at her for a bit… before looking at her hands, large and wide around Amaina’s small form.

Larger and wider than she had ever seen them before.

And, freeing a hand as she laid Amaina down on her lap– a lap too wide to be familiar too her– Dr. Mariah reached up and placed a hand on her bottom lip, where the tingling of power that she had been forced to swallow still felt warm, the power she had been given reacting to an old, half forgotten wish that she had long let go of… or. At least she thought she had.

Looking like a strong, beautiful woman in her thirties, Dr. Mariah looked down at herself, “...well, I suppose I appreciate my clothes grew with me.” She mused, before looking up at Doppio, “I’m about to pass out from shock. Be a dear and fetch my receptionist. Thank you. We’ve had a very fruitful first session.”

And then she collapsed.

Doppio…wasn’t really sure what happened. One second he was just…scared and worried, desperately hoping that Amaina was okay, but not really processing that Dr. Mariah might’ve done something that would make her not okay, and just…

And the next?

It was like getting socked in the chest, Doppio immediately curling in on himself. Feeling…tight. And light headed…but heavy everywhere else…feeling his limbs slacken precisely in that way they had before, everything going wrong, while, bizarrely…he could identify the sound of cracking glass deafeningly loud in his ears…

A gentle urging to vomit came over him, and, poor chap, that’s exactly what he did, Doppio throwing up a small mouthful of…something into his lap while a hot stinging came from his already aching nose…

But when he looked up, seeing two girls kissing…and then a woman in Dr. Mariah’s place…

“...Uuug-aaAA-AAH!” Doppio simpered, scrambling up to go get Dr. Mariah’s receptionist, not noticing the small, red-coated cog that fell from his lap onto the floor. “S-s-s-sir!!”

-

Kaito walked into the lobby, wearing a new shirt and smelling vaguely of ointment, a small bandage taped to the beck of his neck as he looked around. He had half suspected Doppio might be waiting here already, but…

Heading up to the desk, Kaito wasn’t surprised at the lack of receptionist. He just sighed, trying to decide, if the appointment was running late, should he risk knocking on the door? Could be he was in the middle of a breakthrough or something… he’d go sit down, give it a bit. 

Meanwhile, inside the office, Blair was feeding Dr. Mariah a strange, clear, sparkly liquid, having finally woken her up as she panted a little bit, sitting against the wall. 

She kept looking down at herself. At her hands. Shifting slightly, watching her legs stretch out, marveling at them,

“...I have no idea how I’m going to explain this to anyone.” She murmured, “So much for my dwarfism.”

“We could get you an illusion spell, temporarily.” Blair offered, taking the cup from her now that it was empty, “If you’re careful, in your next ‘life’, you can reintroduce yourself as an actual grown woman. You were always going to have to make an illusion of yourself aging as you were eventually anyway.”

“I suppose that’s an option.” Dr. Mariah said, something a little sad already in that. Already fascinated with her new form, wishing to show it off to people. She had grown up. It had taken a thousand years, but…

Demons couldn’t age. It was impossible.

…what was Doppio?

……………….. Her patient, as she said, “Go, check on Doppio again. He’s not drinking his water.”

Blair sighed, getting up and heading to Doppio, squatting in front of him, “The water will help. Dr. Mariah already told you, she’s not upset… there’s no need to punish yourself, by rejecting care.”

He’d killed his therapist. One session, and he’d killed his therapist. What was he going to tell Arven?!

…w-well, he hadn’t straight up killed her, she definitely was alive, she’d just passed out and Doppio knew the difference even as she’d collapsed… B-but he’d done something!! Probably! Maybe?! And she was…n-not doing alright and…

Doppio blinked dazedly up at Blair from his little ball on the floor, the tissues he’d been given dotted red from his nosebleed…once he’d been coherent enough to actually hold them there, and not try to clean the drip of red…not blood down his front. 

…wait, what had he said?

A slow blink. “...water.”

“Yes, that’s correct… wah-tur–”

Dr. Mariah sighed, “He’s in shock, not suddenly incapable of understanding language, Blair. Get him a straw and hoid the glass to his mouth until he’s ready to sip.”

Blair sighed, before getting up, going to look through their supplies. 

Meanwhile, Amaina was nuzzled up in Doppio’s neck, looking sleepy. She hadn’t said much since everything happened, but did seem oddly satisfied, a calm, content feeling radiating off of her.

Dr. Mariah observed Doppio, before saying softly, “There are far worse ways to discover the upper limits of our abilities, Doppio. Your burst of power gave me a gift. A power that needs to be controlled, yes, a power that needs to be used with caution… but no true harm was done today. You have committed no evil.”

If anything, Amaina had done more direct damage to Dr. Mariah than Doppio had. She had given Dr. Mariah the ability to fulfill a wish. The power to do it. There and gone in an instant… she wondered what the chibi had been trying to avoid, getting rid of such power as quickly as she could. 

You did help make a sick new beat, Amaina said sleepily, sounding happy, Senpai is so happy right now. Everyone’s congratulating her. It’s nice to see Senpai enthusiastic about her music again

“Agdueb-” Doppio blinked again, pausing. Knowing that was…not right. So, more slowly, putting the full brunt of his attention on each word, Doppio slowly said, “...I don’t even know what I did… Not snapping or…peeling…or…balloony. D…did…not feel like I did anything…”

…but he’d killed her… And Amaina was…

Doppio looked blearily around, before spotting one of his angel’s twintails draped over his shoulder. “...good. …?”

He blinked again, looking at Dr. Mariah. …she still…looked like herself. Just…bigger. “...good?”

Not entirely. It had still been dramatically against her will, to change her entire physical form, for the most part.

But. Now was not the time to argue the ethics of what had happened, not truly. Dr. Mariah knew how badly this could affect Doppio, in the long, run, and was determined to not allow that to get too out of control, as she nodded confidently. “I think so, yes. My ability to age was something very cruelly taken from me, when I was just a child, entirely against my will. And while I have coped and made not only this life, but many lives before, living with my condition… it has caused me suffering that I could have otherwise, and would have preferred, to avoid. In nearly every life I have lived.”

“But this time? Or, perhaps, next time, depending on how I manage things from this point forward… I can avoid the struggles of looking twelve, trying to function in an adult world.” Dr. Mariah said, looking down to herself, “It is something I have always desired. And your ability seemed to, as far as I understand it, allowed Amaina to grant me that wish.”

“The way it happened was messy. And alarming. But that is because you are young, and learning, and even infants can make their parents bleed when they are teething and gnawing,” Dr. Mariah said, “You are not unique, in your ability to accidentally harm from ignorance. It’s a common problem. But we are all very lucky, truly, that what you did today was not, in any sense, an act of harm. You clumsily did something very kind. I am grateful that you used your ability to help others, when it flowed out from you. It was a good thing.”

“Drink, water.” Blaise insisted, holding a straw to Doppio’s lips.

Doppio didn’t think he was…a force of ‘good’ in the world, whatever that meant. Amaina could call him a beautiful thing, and Kaito and Arven could call him sweet and good…but Doppio knew that…he really could only see what was right in front of him. What people, and most importantly, for most of his existence, The Boss wanted from him. And he had always sought to deliver. He didn’t want to hurt others…but he didn’t go out of his way to avoid it, when he could see a path to his goals instead. 

…he wasn’t a kind person, and he wasn’t good. 

…but he desperately didn’t want to have done something to destroy Mariah. 

And…while things would dramatically change for her, against her will, without her permission…he was relieved that she didn’t hate him for it. And that it was something she wouldn’t simply have to suffer to live going forward. 

Still…

“S-s-sorry…” Doppio stuttered out, the remorse in the apology true, but the words feeling…lacking. For all the explanation she’d given him, that he did comprehend… But it was all that would come to his lips. 

…when had this guy come back…?

Looking at the straw for a moment, Doppio put his lips around it. And after a moment, it seemed he remembered what to do, and started drinking. 

…was he over time?

The idea seemed to alarm him, as it drifted into his head, and Doppio’s eyes widened, opening his mouth to ask…and drooling over himself a bit. “....uuogh.”

Blair wrinkled his nose a little, pulling the straw back, “Ngh.”

“Oh, honestly, Blair.” Dr. Mariah sighed, before, shakily, she tried to stand up… before finding that a tad too intimidating, she shuffled over on her hands and knees to Doppio. Determined to help him as she said, “Let’s sit up now, shall we? Start bringing the strength back into your back and hips. Come on, up…”

“S-sorry, so-sorry…” Doppio mumbled, unsure what to do with his arms for a moment, before he decided to wipe up the water and drool from his mouth with his sleeve, and just pressed the tissues to his nose more firmly. 

…sit up. Sit up. 

Nodding, Doppio…well…did that. Looking down at himself a little concerned as… Why did it feel like that… Why was he shaking…?

“...m’ai og…over time? …can leave, sorry…”

Dr. Mariah hesitated. 

In truth, she should seriously consider sending him away. She had her own things she needed to process… but this looked like a crisis to her, and in good conscious, she couldn’t let him leave like this. Not truly. 

“You are, but I always leave time for emergency sessions,” Dr. Mariah said, before glancing to Blair, “Though, that means Kaito is likely out there. Doppio, I’d like to keep you here long enough to let you sleep, for a bit. If you’re stable when you awake, I’d feel okay sending you home. But for now, I don’t want to send you back while you’re still processing.”

“That’s my recommendation. Keep you here, let you rest, see how you feel when you awake… but I can’t make you.” Dr. Mariah said, “It’s ultimately up to you. What would you like to do?”

Doppio made a soft, distressed sound. Kaito was going to freak out if he saw red all down Doppio’s front…not to mention a nosebleed. He said he’d advocate for him and Arven getting to go to the cafe no matter what…but Kaito lied all the time. He’d take one look at Doppio and…and tie him to a bed, or something… Make him go see a doctor again. 

“...t-tired of sleeping…” Doppio moaned, curling into himself again. “Dunwah…d-don’t wanna see more doctors…”

…just a dumb, stupid baby, burden on everyone else…

Eyes snapping open, Doppio suddenly got up on jittery limbs, giving Dr. Mariah and Blair a desperate look. “D-d-d-do you h…have a b-back entrance?”

“Yeah, around the corner and–”

“Blair,” Dr. Mariah snapped, before looking back to Doppio, frowning, “...I won’t stop you. But I caution you to consider why you want to do this. You’re not feeling well, Doppio, Kaito’s assistance in returning to the castle, if you’re determined to leave, would be helpful. And ultimately, resting here until you feel better is the best of all the options. It’d be wildly irresponsible of me to let you wander off in this state alone.”

Doppio just kept looking at Dr. Mariah with that desperate, wounded look. Before he softly stuttered, “....d-don’t want t-to be…so-somewaaaa…one. You have t-to take c-c-care of… Did to you… Sh-shouldn’t…stay…”

“...K-Kaito doesn’t know…”

Well, Kaito did know, but… Dr. Mariah couldn’t out him. That would also be wildly irresponsible. What should she do…

“Blair, take Doppio home.” Dr. Mariah instructed, “Use the back entrance.”

Blair looked skeptical, to say the least. “You sure? The kids not in his right mind, it’s unnecessarily complicated.”

“If this had all happened before time was up, Kaito would have just missed us having you escort Doppio home anyway.” Dr. Mariah said, “It’s just a mismatch of timing. I’ll figure it out with Kaito, just make certain Doppio gets back home safely.”

“...can you even get up–”

“Now, Blair.”

“Right, right,” Blair huffed, offering Doppio a hand, “You heard the boss lady. Time to go.”

What would be in his right mind? Was there a right way to react to this? Just…grin and skip along after you killed your first friend and therapist (they weren’t dead they were okay they don’t hate you) and just…

…boss. 

Doppio didn’t think he needed to be guided by the hand like a little kid…but he only blinked owlishly at Blair’s hand before lightly taking it. Most of the drool was in his sweater, but…still. Didn’t want to be gross…

“...need directions?”

“To the castle?” Blair asked, grasping his hand and pulling him up, “What am I, Luminous? Come on.”

-

Kaito glanced up, hearing a door open and close. Still not seeing anyone come in through the lobby, he adjusted the new shirt around him, before tapping at his knees. Just be patient… if she extended their time, it was important to be patient. Doppio likely needed it. He could trust Dr. Mariah. 

Patience…

-

They were about halfway back when Doppio insisted he could walk on his own, and Blair, already feeling confident they’d be there soon, let him.

He walked ahead, listening to Doppio sort of shuffle and stumble behind. “...hey, so. Look, I can’t even imagine what it is you’ve got going on, but Dr. Mariah? She’s a tough old thing. Strong inside and out, it’s more than a little intimidating sometimes. What I’m saying is, if she says you’re fine, that you didn’t hurt her? I believe her. Honestly, I can’t imagine what could actually hurt her. You might be a lot, kid, but you’re not at her level. So you don’t have to feel like you got the upper hand on her or… something…”

Blair glanced over his shoulder, looking left, looking right… “Ah, shit.”

-

We going back for the nap? Amaina asked sleepily, resting on top of Doppio’s head.

“...m going home,” Doppio mumbled quietly, feeling like he was just…a jumble of loose parts in a forgotten box as he focused on putting one foot in front of the other. Even over a week out of practice, the route ingrained in his body enough to know it. 

“...hurt M-Mariah… Kaito’s g-gonna ffffreak… ‘Ven’s at school ‘n…even th-then…d-don’t wanna burden him more…”

Doppio swallowed, feeling a shiver go down his spine that nearly made him faceplant. “...s’okay… I-if Boss ‘s in custody…then ‘s empty… Jus’ll… Sleep. Get m’ things back t-too…”

“...’m s-sorry,” he whispered to Amaina.

Amaina sighed, gently patting Doppio on the forehead. I know you're sorry you anxious little weirdo~ But I will and can and has and will always be ready to play with you when you’re done worrying about pointless things. Just gotta… Amaina yawned… wait out your brain going brrrrrrrr. I’ll wait for you~

And upgrade will come get you eventually, she continued confidently, that’s what I picked him for. Always want you to have someone better~ take care of all the stupid little things so that we can focus on the big, beautiful picture… just gotta wait~

Brrrr… That was a good way to put it. That rattling feeling…yeah. 

Doppio frowned at the ground. “...took all my clothes already… S-so I can’t change b-before he finds me…damnit. I-I-I’ll figure it out… A-always figure it out…”

“Ho-ho-hope y - s-senpai’s s-song is…n-nice…” he mumbled. A long walk ahead of them. 

-

And as Doppio got to that familiar door, nearly collapsing against it…well. He had one item of luck that day, at least. 

He still had his key.

It’s not, necessarily, that Diavolo knew Doppio was coming… but he wasn’t surprised he was there, as he heard the door open. 

He could feel it. Feel him. His lesser half, returned…

Though, Diavolo was still hiding in the firecase, squeezed inside the soot and ash, just on the off chance someone came in. He hadn’t been expecting anyone. It had been several hours now. The soot, in his mind, helped him blend into the darkness.

He glared at Doppio from within the fireplace, when a light flickered on. “Grown bold in our time apart, have we?”

Doppio hadn’t had a reason to believe Kaito was lying, when he said The Boss had been arrested. He’d believed wholeheartedly that whatever play Boss was doing, it was part of a grand plan. 

It hadn’t occurred to Doppio in the slightest, that it wasn’t Boss they had arrested. 

As that familiar voice rocketed through his head, well…

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!” Doppio screamed, reeling back and falling on his ass, bloodied tissue falling away from his face, revealing the mess underneath. But even in the same, erratic breath, Doppio miserably failed to scramble up on shaking, awkward limbs, as he sputtered, “O-OH FU-FUCK I CAN’T B-BE HERE!!”

“Oh, honestly, Doppio, must you always choose the most undignified way to go about things?” Diavolo asked, as he shuffled and wiggled his way out of the firecase, before standing up and, looking around, quickly hurtling to the light, shutting it off. “Ah… much better…”

Looking down at Doppio on the floor, Diavolo frowned, “You are considerably late. I hope you don’t expect to be paid for the days you missed. You will not be.”

He couldn’t be there, he couldn’t be there, Kaito was going to find him and if Kaito was there then he’d see Boss and they’d know they hadn’t actually gotten Boss and Doppio would’ve ruined everything AGAIN--

Doppio froze from his ineffective scramble (though the shaking still hadn’t subsided) as Boss emerged from…somewhere, and…towered over him and…

“...h-huh?” Doppio said quietly, just…not understanding. 

“You’ve missed several days, Doppio. Over two weeks.We could potentially dismiss it as some of your paid vacation, but disappearing without notice is stretching that policy, as I’m sure you know.” Diavolo said, peering down at Doppio’s bloodied face, frowning, “...you are unsightly. How have you managed to do such damage to yourself? Come, get up, lets run your nose under the sink.”

…huh?

But…

Doppio’s eyes widened as he glanced around. …no Arven. So…he was really…

…but…he hadn’t just…imagined all that. He just wasn’t that creative. So…what…?

“I-I-I-I -” Doppio stammered, unable to get any other sound out as, once again, he pushed himself up, though…with significantly more swaying and shakes this time. Even as he dutifully started stumbling over to the sink. “C-castle, a-a-arrest, ‘n. K-k….quit…’n…fu…fuck…m K-killed ‘em…fuck…”

A shaky, frightened breath left Doppio, his voice breaking. “....Boss?”