"Queen Sara," Prince Byakuya practically growled. A spark of hatred in his heart as he stared at his father. "She took over when her father died unexpectedly almost two years ago...you sent diplomats to the funeral..."

King Leon waved his hand dismissively again, "Right, right, her. We'll pressure her using the favor she owes you to put trading pressure on Dicea. And I'll ask your mother to ask Novoselic and see if they can't do the same thing...ha! You wanna fuck with me Aiichi? I'm gonna hit you where it hurts. See how much your people love you when the cost of food goes up..."

Byakuya glowered at his father. He had worked hard for that favor, and was planning to use it for more than father’s fucking pissing match. And his father was entirely unwilling to hear Byakuya's concerns about Kaito...and it sounded like he was about to go spending resources they didn't fucking have on this conflict again...

The heir apparent gripped his hands into fists...his patience thinning. His heart long hardened.

...something had to be done.

Nao sighed quietly, flipping through her notebook while a different, significantly less filled one sat to her side, untouched for the time being. Then, she stopped on a sketch quite different from the others that littered the notebook. This one took up a whole page, had no notes scrawled into the free space. And it was of someone smiling.

A teenage girl with long seafoam-colored hair pulled into a ponytail, laughing in delight, her sharp features softened, caught in a rare moment. Nao sighed again. It was for the best, she knew, but...the heart was complicated. With all she'd observed, she knew that all too well.

Wakame would've never changed her mind. When you commit yourself fully to disregarding life, to considering all people as an 'other', there's no going back. And, in hindsight, knowing the kindness that had surrounded them, Nao could say that it would be an educated guess to say that her hatred and disgust was just an inherent part of Wakame. Some people were like that. Unswayed by people like, say, Aiichi and the little prince.

The good thing about that, was that people ruled by despair could rarely do things on their own--they had to convince others. And those others were usually taken in by despair through their own poor circumstances or confusion, which made it so people who harnessed hope could reach them. Nao had seen Kokichi do it over and over, so effectively and naturally even when he'd been but a tiny child.

Giving a hitwoman an option other than mandatory compliance. Giving a terrified girl safety. Giving an outraged freedom fighter a difficult truth. Giving an obsessed maniac the consequence of her actions.

Kokichi would give and give everything he had for the people of Dicea. For anyone. And...people would give back. Nao had seen it herself and...that mutual love was why Wakame had been wrong.

Her old friend was a horrible person, she knew. Wakame had wanted to turn this bright, colorful, insane world into some utterly boring, barren wasteland, sure that it was the true state of things, the true nature of humanity. And, naive and hopelessly intrigued, Nao had sat down to watch and record the whole thing.

But Wakame had been wrong, and in the end, consumed by the hatred she'd created for...no reason. And people had chosen to stand with hope and love instead, through their actions of just doing the small things that felt right.

Wakame was foolish, just like those so-called "revolutionaries", but...the librarian still missed her old friend, the girl with hair like the sea and a gap in her teeth that snagged her lips when she smiled.

Nao looked up from her journal, hearing a small huff. The Head Scribe, paying a visit to the library, but looking down at the portrait with something more than sleep in his eyes for once. Hurt, anger, suspicion... Nao swallowed, feeling a phantom burn in her throat, but she smiled at the man gently and turned the page.

"Good morning, Ryouhei. My bad, thinking about the past when the present is right here--can I help you with anything?"

The look faded from the scribe's eyes and he shook his head. "Got it myself. Yasu?"

The librarian's smile softened in affection, the burn fading away. "Oh, you know her. Yasu's finally relaxing since that secretary should be out of Dicea by now, but she's realized that it also means that Aihito's on his way back." Nao giggled a bit, still finding amusement in how uncomfortable her wife was with the confidant man. "She's even seeking out cases herself to work on so they'll be too busy to chitchat about his trip--too bad I wanna know. The Luminary Royal Family is so deliciously corrupt that I bet it got through even Aihito's rose-colored glasses; I can't wait to hear all about it!"

Ryouhei just shook his head at that and turned to go onto what he'd come to the library for. "Never change, Nao."

Ah! Ah! The swordsman was finally being introduced!

He was mysterious but brave, a commoner with a dark, troubled past (Kaito bet anything it had to do with the crime-boss. It all had to connect somehow, right?), trying to make a new life for himself and his daughter in a new place. They came from a rough background, and though their new home seemed nice, the daughter was seriously struggling to adapt, lashing out at her father, blaming him for their new, strange circumstances. The father was trying to be patient, trying to be there for her while still being, well...a father. But his daughter's anger was wearing away at him, and it didn't help that he seemed to also be struggling to adapt to the new place, wondering if he had done the right thing in leaving his old home, even for their own safety...

Kaito read, entranced, as a woman at the market called him out, telling him his presence was bound to invite trouble to the otherwise quiet neighborhood (she was probably going to end up being a love interest. The narrative went into too much loving detail of her appearance for her to remain an antagonist), the swordsman trying to ignore her, but lo and behold, as soon as he leaves the shop, three gangsters (ahhh, there was the connection) from his old home were outside waiting for him. He fights them off to protect himself, and two of the gangsters run off, but the third one is bleeding out in the marketplace, and everyone is looking at him like he's a monster...

Kaito felt his hands start to shake...it was a good story but...maybe he should take a break...

Kokichi snuffled quietly before slowly blinking his eyes open, awaking from a small nap. His body still felt relaxed and free from the worst of the ache, but he found himself a little more...present. Less likely to handwave things to focus on relaxation. Though...there still wasn't much he had to focus on. He wanted to work, but Kokichi knew that his hands only felt okay because of the massage oil and that trying to write would only bring the ache back. Budgeting could wait until the pay cycle, they'd have to wait for Shuuichi to exhibit definable symptoms before they could actually declare if he was sick or not...

Nuzzling against Kaito's side, Kokichi rolled onto his back, stretching a little with a yawn. There had to be something productive he could do... "Mmmng... 'm gonna have another muffin--do you want one, Kai-chan?"

He rolled a little more, reaching down to grab at the bag he'd placed on the floor after getting his initial muffin. Kokichi didn't feel particularly hungry or anything, but the muffin had been so good, and he was kinda craving something sweet. And it'd give him time to think of something to do.

"How's the story been?"

Kaito glanced over at Kokichi, still a little lost in the story, shaking his head...before he realized Kokichi probably couldn't see that and said, "Thanks, 'Kichi', I'm good though. And it's good! I mean, it's weird? Again, I can't really work out what the tone is. I might be trying to read into it too much actually. Like, there's a LOT of stereotypical story beats in here, right? And it's so predictable that I keep thinking it's trying to lull me into a false sense of security...but it just might be straight up that kind of story, ya know?"

He closed the book, feeling a little better to be out of the world, actually. That last scene had started making him feel, oh...anxious? Maybe? He wasn't sure why. "Either way, it's written in a way where, even when you know exactly what's gonna happen, you're still pretty interested in seeing it happen."

Kaito put the book aside on his nightstand...and then glanced down at the closed drawer. Kokichi's letter was still in there, unopened...Byakuya would be furious to know Kaito hadn't given it to him yet...

Kaito felt a spark of nerves at the idea. He didn't like disappointing his brother...but he also couldn't stomach the idea of upsetting Kokichi yet, if the letter ended up being something unpleasant. He just...didn't wanna deal with it yet. Later. He'd give it to Kokichi later.

Turning to Kokichi, he grinned wide. "You were out for awhile. How're you feeling?"

Kokichi nodded, only grabbing one muffin from the bag and sitting himself up to eat it, starting to munch as he listened to Kaito's mid-plot review. "Mm... So you're just kind of along for the ride? Good thing it's well-written enough to supplement predictability though--I'd take something like that over something with a unique plot but poorly written any day. It's just so frustrating when you can see the potential a story had but it's held back by the author."

He'd read like, seven novels in a space opera series like that. The setting and premise was just so cool, but how the author treated the characters and set up the plot was just dumb as hell. There were a ton of other books in the series, but he'd just lost interest, no matter how fantastical the setting was.

Taking time to savor the muffin, though he still was eating it relatively quickly, Kokichi returned Kaito's smile as he swallowed a bite. "I'm good--that massage oil does wonders, you know? I might still be a little sore tomorrow, but it'll get better until it just goes away. Right now, I'm just kinda wanting to get some work done but..." He sighed, frustrated. "I can't even tell myself that I'll just read shit and get back to them later, since I know I'll wanna write back right away, and, well, you saw how much my hands didn't want to cooperate this morning...is it still morning, actually?"

He looked over to the clock, finishing off his muffin and nodding a bit to himself as he saw it was the early afternoon now.

Kaito shook his head, looking over at Kokichi curiously. "No, I don't think so. You were asleep for a good couple of hours. Oh, but...I mean, I was gonna take a break from reading anyway. If you need help writing something...I mean, I can help?"

Kokichi perked up, expression melting from surprise into affection. "D'aw. Thanks, hun. Returning the favor, right?" He snickered a little, bopping his head against Kaito's arm. "I kinda wish your brother had sent another letter or something, so we could just keep switching up the handwriting of what we send back. Too bad he prolly knows yours super well so it wouldn't be confusing, like, at all."

Sliding off the bed, Kokichi rolled his ankles and bent his knees a bit, stretching and preparing himself. "Alright! Let's go to the mailroom, then."

Oh god damn it Atua strike him down.

Kaito felt another splash of nerves rip through his stomach as he grinned, laughing as he said, a tad too loud, "Haha, yep! Yep! That'd...be a thing!" In a normal tone, he said, "Let me fix my hair real quick...oh, and let me brush my teeth! I probably still smell like you. One second."

A couple of minutes later, Kaito came back out, a little more put together as he grinned at his husband. "Kay. Lead the way!"

Kokichi gave Kaito a curious look. Kaito had been...awkward and nervous, he guessed, the last time he mentioned messing with Byakuya too. Obviously, Kokichi didn't know what having siblings was like, but...whatever. He didn't know, and if Kaito was uncomfortable even with the idea of messing with his brother, then Kokichi wouldn't push for it. He'd keep having ideas and telling Kaito about them, of course, but he wouldn't try to implement one.

His curiosity soon turned to flustered embarrassment, though, and Kokichi almost slapped his hands to his face with how quickly he tried to hide the bright blush. God. He'd fully spilled in Kaito's mouth, and his husband had sucked every little bit of cum out of him, not to mention cleaned his dick with his tongue. Fuck. He hadn't noticed, but if it was his own scent, then he wouldn't, right? But other people would, and the last thing Kokichi wanted was for them to add another little nugget of knowledge to the pool of how Kaito had sexed him up.

By the time Kaito came out Kokichi's blush had cooled a little, but he was still pink, flustered as he took Kaito's arm and pressed his face against it a bit. Even as they left their room, though he managed to calm down more as they walked downstairs and over to the mailroom.

It was a huge room, people going in and out, shelves and containers everywhere, letters and packages moving around the whole thing with efficiency. It was kind of overwhelming for someone who'd never seen it before, but Kokichi was very familiar with it. Waving to a few postal workers and citizens alike, Kokichi went over to an out of the way shelf and pulled a bin out, the label on the side declaring, GOVT BUSINESS: MANAGERIAL

The bin wasn't overflowing with letters. It rarely was, thanks to Kokichi's own worrying work ethic. In fact, there were only about ten letters in the bin, likely things that had recently come in that Hideki or Aiichi hadn't gotten to yet. Not a ton of work, but it was still important. Taking all ten, ignoring a concerned and exasperated look from one of the postal workers passing by, Kokichi turned to Kaito with a nod and led him over to a different section of the room. "That's work, but, while we're here, I wanna check on personal letters. They put your box next to mine, so you can check yours too."

Kaito had been in here yesterday, briefly, to get his letter to Byakuya out, but he had really just waited by the front door while one of the postal workers had helped him get set up. He looked around curiously, the hustle and bustle of the room entertaining, in its own way, though Kaito couldn't help but feel a little in the way as he followed closely by Kokichi's side. He wondered if his letter to Byakuya was still around here somewhere, or if it was already on the road. Probably still here, honestly, it had been almost dark when he had mailed it out, after all. It would be understandable if it hadn't even been sorted yet. Probably? Kaito didn't know anything about how a system like this possibly worked, but maaaan, did everyone look busy.

...he had a box?

His letters from Byakuya kept being delivered to his room, so Kaito had just sort of assumed all letters would...but it was probably Byakuya himself who was insisting that his letters to Kaito be hand delivered to him. Huh. Well, he knew his parents’ letters were being redirected to Byakuya, so he probably couldn't expect anything from them, but he wondered if maybe Kaede-

Kaito gaped. There were...easily over a dozen letters in his box, a few closed with official looking seals. There was also a strong scent of perfume coming from the box. Uh...

"Whoops," Kaito murmured, reaching into his box to pick all of them up, shuffling through them. "Guess I should have been checking this, huh?"

When Kokichi opened his box, it was empty, but...it usually was. Nothing special about that. However, seeing Kaito's haul made him snort laughter, though he sniffed a bit at the perfume-y scent. "Probably! Thankfully for the letters from Luminary, though, you can just blame difficulty crossing the border for any delays, but you should probably get on those before helping me out. I gotta prolly do research 'n shit anyway before I gotta write anything down."

They'd been pretty busy, yeah, and Kaito had barely been able to read much during the worst of his concussion, but it did soothe Kokichi to see the amount of correspondence his husband had received. With how Kaito spoke fondly of his friends in Luminary, he'd hoped that they wouldn't all just drop communication because Kaito was in another country. In the former enemy country, married to the former enemy prince.

Kokichi chewed on his lip a bit, but kept a smile up as they left the mailroom. ...it would be okay. Everyone knew that it was a political marriage--he wouldn't tarnish Kaito's reputation with his people by association. Bonds that Kaito had made wouldn't be broken...even if they were strained now.

"You can write at my desk if you want, since I'll just be reading for the most part. We should really request a work desk of your own, actually... Unless you'd want an office? We definitely have rooms to spare for one," Kokichi prattled, stuffing his nerves away.

Kaito looked at the names on the fronts of envelopes as he followed Kokichi, smiling at some of them.

Yep! There was Kaede! She had used the official seal of her house, but that was probably to try to ensure the mail wouldn't get lost or tossed aside, rather than because it was any official business.

Who else...heh, speak of the devil and he will appear; there was a letter from Fuyuhiko. He was probably just being polite, reaching out in case Kaito needed anything.

Who else...

Uh...Sahara? That was pretty random. He hadn't spoken to her in years...

Uh...oh dear. Marcus? It was nice to hear from him, but why...

Oh, geez, Samuel, also using his family's official seal...why was his and Marcus's in separate letters? Hadn't those two gotten back together? Kaito still felt bad about what had happened...

Awww, Monique! This one felt thick, probably two letters in it. Rawr-XD maybe?

Chad?? Come on, man, what? Why was he contacting him now??

Another noble family seal, but Kaito didn't recognize it for a second...Oof, wait a minute...Balisong and Saber...that...probably wasn't going to be terribly friendly...

And one letter that was entirely black, with no name on it, but Kaito would bet anything was Korekiyo. It was his style.

Why the hell were so many of his ex's suddenly trying to get a hold of him?? Kaito just stared at the pile of letters, just...baffled. Maybe they were just...reaching out to him? Sure, they were all ex's, but they had also all been friends...admittedly, Kaito didn't have a lot of friends that weren't some form of ex now...but there were a lot of people in here that weren't, like, among his friendly ex's. What on earth could Samuel want, for instance; they had barely been on speaking terms when he left...

Oh well...again, maybe it was just old friends reaching out? He had said goodbye to a lot of his current friends before he left in a...pretty final feeling kind of party. It'd have been nice to get a letter from some of them, but he could understand why maybe they wouldn't have, with Kaito never likely coming back. But all of these people were old friends that Kaito hadn't had a reason to seek out for a goodbye, so...maybe just getting their goodbyes in? That was nice, actually...

An office? What on earth would Kaito do with an office?

Well, okay, maybe...work in it? On what, though? Well...he was going to eventually work on these letters too, right? That's what Kokichi wanted? Maybe an office would make that easier?

...spare rooms huh...actually...

"Uh, 'Kichi, do you think...you have any, like...spare closets or something I could actually permanently take up?" Kaito asked, an idea coming across from his earlier concern about offerings. "Something I could turn into a shrine?"

"Oh!" Fuck, he'd totally forgotten. To be fair, thinking about religion wasn't something Kokichi often did. "Of course! I, uh, don't really know what you'd need for a shrine, so we can talk about that and get you a good place for it, but, um!"

He bounced a little on his toes as they walked, though he quickly stopped that, feeling a bit of uncomfortable strain in his calves. "After the binding ceremony, I guess Aiichi felt bad that the basement was kinda sucky for it? So he reached out to Atua believers in the city to get their thoughts on either setting up a temple in town or turning one of the meeting rooms in the castle into a...like, mini temple, I guess? A place of worship, anyhow. I don't know when they're gonna start setting it up, though, so we can totally get you a temporary shine...or a permanent personal one? Does that work?"

Kokichi still found some Atuan practices...uncomfortable, but...it was Kaito's faith, and he was dedicated to it. It was such a small thing to do for Kaito, amid all the jarring, big changes in coming to Dicea. While Aiichi worked on creating a proper communal space for their people, Kokichi could ensure one for his husband.

"Um...I'm guessing you'd need enough space for a table of some sort? And ventilation for candles, right? You do use them, right?" Kokichi rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly, offering Kaito a soft grin. "Sorry, I don't...really know what you do. For any religion, really."

Kaito shrugged. "Candles are nice, but they're more decoration than anything else in a shrine. Oh, but, there are a few, like, holiday things where I'll need to smoke a Kiseru. So maybe vents for that? And a table would be nice, but preferably a really low one, something I could comfortably use kneeling, ya know?" Kaito mused, thinking about the baffling idea that there would maybe be an Atua Temple in the city someday...wow.

...was...was it really going to be okay to put a temple to his family's religion, just after a fifteen year war?

Would doing something like just pressure Atuans to expose themselves as Atuans to people who...might not appreciate the idea of it?

Kaito nibbled on his lip, wondering if this was something he should talk to King Aiichi about...but, as son of the chosen family, Kaito certainly should allow the temple to be built, to bring glory to Atua, right? Regardless of the position it might put his followers in...?

Dicea wasn't like Luminary. Maybe no one would mind at all?

...they...they did riot on a pregnant woman twenty years ago...and she wasn't even responsible for, like, their brothers’ and sisters’ and parents’ and friends’ deaths en masse or anything...

Kaito shook his head, getting out of his own head as they headed up the stairs, towards their room.

"Uh...sorry, um, beyond that? I'd just put a bowl in there, a knife, some bandages, a copy of the Great Book, which, I brought along my copy, so that's fine, um...it'd be nice to put up some pictures of the saints on the walls, but, again, I don't need a lot of space to do that...yeah, honestly I only really need the bowl, the knife, and the book. It's just, ya know...nice having a quiet place to put all that stuff."

...what the hell was a Kiseru? Considering Atuan practices...he might not want to know. But, okay, vents for occasional use, a low table, wall space for portraits...ideally some sanitary, enclosed space to keep bandages and the like in, but that could just be a first aid box... Kokichi could find a space for that, easy. Oh, it'd probably be nice to have a bookstand too! He'd have to see how big the "Great Book" was so he could find one that would work.

Nodding a bit, Kokichi hummed, thinking through the available spaces in the castle. "If I can, I'll try to find a room close to a bathroom, too. That way it'll be easy to get water 'n shit. And...wash things, if you do that? I dunno what you do with the..." he made a vague gesture, not thinking about it too much, "blood?" He was kind of curious what the respectful way of cleaning the bowls and knives and stuff would be in a religion that focused so heavily on blood sacrifice, but it was something he didn't really want to focus on that much, lest he make himself woozy.

"I...think there's a room upstairs that would work alright?" Kokichi's head tipped to the side as he thought, climbing up the stairs and not focusing on the returning ache in his knees. "On the fourth floor, I mean. It used to be a storage room for painting classes, so it has ventilation, but during the summer it would get too hot and the paint would start melting so we moved the studio and storage room to the first floor. As far as I know, it's not being used for anything, so... We can check it out later, and I'll ask my dad about it. I'm pretty sure you'll be able to use it though!"

That was one problem solved, Kokichi feeling a bit better about things already. Kaito could have his peaceful place of worship, no problem.

The blood on the knife and such could be cleaned any way you wanted to, but blood on an altar was just meant to...sit there. Ideally forever, old blood being covered by new blood. And, honestly, you didn't even really need the bowl. A lot of people made offerings right onto the altar itself (the altar, in this context, just being the area around the book. So long as either the book or an iron symbol of Atua was placed there more or less permanently, literally just spilling blood on a dirt patch counted as an offering to Atua. It wasn't, honestly, a religion that demanded too much preparation or presentation. Kaito had always appreciated that about it. Atua was not a jealous or mean god. He loved his people. He asked so little of his followers...hell, even the bloodletting was more about honoring the Saints than Atua himself...

...not that Kokichi would probably want to hear about any of that.

Kaito kept it to himself, and just smiled. "That sounds perfect! Thanks 'Kichi."

Kaito opened the door to their room for Kokichi, stepping aside to let him in before following, feeling pretty pleased himself. A little shrine, all to himself...that'd be nice. There weren't any major holidays coming up, but Saint Hava's recognition day was coming up soon, and Kaito had always liked the story of the blessed midwife, so, if the shrine was ready by then, he'd honor her when it came up. Yeah...Kaito grinned, placing his letters on the desk before turning to Kokichi. "You sure you don't need me to start helping you now? These letters waited till now, they could probably wait longer. It's basically just all old friends anyway."

Kokichi walked over to their bed once they returned, setting the management letters down and tried not to be obvious about massaging his knees a little. Kaito had already fussed over him so much... He had said to let him know if Kokichi started to hurt again, but...it wasn't so bad. And if he was just gonna be reading over the letters and whatever records or data or whatever was needed, he wasn't going to be straining himself any.

So Kokichi just shook his head a little, opening up the first letter. "Thanks, but it'll be a little bit before I need anything written down anyway. Unless Kai-chan just wants to stare at the ceiling, read your letters! Your friends took the time to write to you--it's nice, right?" Kokichi knew that if he had, like, a new letter from Iruma sent to his box and not an official letter from her, he'd be tearing into it right away. She was really the only person to talk to him casually like that, even if their letters were just filled with insults to each other. Surely Kaito wanted to hear from friends.

Kokichi read through the first matter of business, something super easy he didn't even need to get a reference book for. The representative of Pifet writing in to let the castle know that the repairs on the reservoir they'd requested funds for months ago were completed. They'd finished under budget, but had used the rest of the funds to improve the main pipes in the town. Included in the envelope were the item and labor statements and receipts, proving that the money had been put to good use and...yeah, they were legitimate. Perfect! Pifet, being closer to the coast, would have quite a rainy season coming up when fall started to really hit them, so, not only would the reservoir have plenty of useful storage, but the extra strain would be easily handled by better pipes. He'd just give the statements to Yuliya later to store in Pifet's infrastructure folder, and tell his father about it later. If the town requested help for the pipes in the near future, then it'd be easy to justify looking into the company that had installed them, or for any actual issues.

And...on to the next!

Kaito did, in fact, watch Kokichi work for a little bit, just...entranced by the change in his whole demeanor as he worked. That small furrowing of his brow as he read. The way his whole body seemed to still. That little frown that would just suddenly twist upwards when Kokchi was pleased...

There he was again...that calm, cool intelligence...

Kaito tried to open his own letters quietly, so as not to disturb Kokichi's thought process while he worked. He opened Kaede's first.

He smiled, reading it. As he had expected, it was just his cousin checking in on him, asking how everything was, what Dicea was like. Then she went into long paragraphs, talking about university (she went to a different, more advanced university than he did, one without a military program, but they had enjoyed whining about their classes and professors to each other), about how things were in Luminary (ah. Some talks about the terrorist attacks that Byakuya had mentioned. The only thing Kaede had to say about them was that they were some nutty extreme mix of nihilism and decadence philosophy, but that they were, as she put it, 'mostly just a bunch of losers convincing each other to kill themselves in big public areas for fun. It'd be easy to just leave them to it till they died out entirely if they didn't have a habit of taking a few random people with them.'). A whole paragraph just telling Kaito that she loved him and missed him and that if he needed anything at all to reach out to her.

And then one final line for Kokichi.

Kaito smiled warmly at the letter. "Hey, Kokichi. Kaede says hi, congratulations on the wedding, and that if you ever did anything to hurt me that she'd hang you in a public square until birds ate you alive," he said with a chuckle. "She's kidding. She doesn't like public executions. Thinks they're bad for morale."

He cheerfully put her letter aside. Started reading Fuyuhiko's. His was short and professional. Just an offering from the future head of the Kuzuryuu family to give aid should Kaito ever need it, an invitation for him and Kokichi to use the family's border headquarters should they need somewhere to rest while, presumably, on the way to visit the capitol. Oh, and a message to Kokichi. "Um, the Kuzuryuu family offers you their services, Kokichi, if you ever want underground goods or services," Kaito informed him, frowning at the last part as he added in, "And, uh....wants me to let you know that I'm under their protection. Awww. He really is a softie. You remember the guy that I said I made an enemy out of in high school? He's...oh, sorry, you're working. Sorry, I'll tell you about it later," Kaito said, suddenly remembering he was trying not to distract him.

He put Fuyuhiko's on top of Kaede's, moving on to the more confusing letters.

Not all the letters were as simple as the first, which, duh, yeah, he figured. He did end up needing to get some reference books and ledgers, but that was no biggie, even if his hips joined in with his knees' complaints after a while. He was reading through ecologist reports of a region in the west for a farmer who was asking about the ramifications of over-hunting a certain species of bird that had been eating about 15% of the summer's yield when Kaito spoke up.

He smiled a bit at his cousin's greeting, though scoffed at her protective threat. How accidentally appropriate. "If it's alright, could you add in that I thank her for the congratulations, and that, from how you speak of her, I'm looking forward to the day we meet? And that, if I did hurt you, I'd let her do that to me privately."

Hmm...the bird population had risen over the last few decades, so some hunting should be fine, but... Perhaps he could write to Iruma and ask her for her input on a sort of scarecrow that would ward off even the most ballsy birds... He should ask the farmer to keep an eye out on the bug populations as he hunted though, just to make sure they were keeping things balanced... Or ask an entomologist to study the area? It could be interesting...he'd put a notice out. No harm in asking.

Looking up again, Kokichi just raised an eyebrow at the next letter. The Kuzuryuu family...right. Their people had routed a lot of the trade diversions Diceans had put on Luminary goods, back in the day. Apparently it had been more to make sure the family got what it needed, and they'd been able to cut something of a deal to distribute the goods as the Kuzuryuu family saw fit as long as they didn't route the goods to the Luminary castle.

Kokichi didn't think he'd need any, er, underground assistance, but it was nice to know that a leading power like that was willing to talk back and forth. Would probably make sure distribution of any future Dicean aid to Luminary would be able to reach the cracks of society... Kokichi was broken out of business mode for a second, snickering at the clue to the absolutely juicy story Kaito had hinted at before.

Waving Kaito off, indicating that it was fine, Kokichi idly rubbed a knee. "Fuck, you really gotta tell me that story at some point. And even if it was in what looks like a personal letter to you? I should probably send an official letter of my own to thank the Kuzuryuu family, huh. And though I really would rather not be targeted by, essentially, the mob? You can let your friend know that the message has been passed on loud and clear."

"I will, I will, I'm not trying to, like, tease it or anything, I just don't wanna distract you while you're working." Kaito snickered, opening up the next letter. Might as well just get Samuel's over with, see what he had to say...

...Kaito's face went carefully blank.

He read through the whole thing, about two pages long. When he was done, he put it aside, in a different pile than the one he had made with Kaede and Fuyuhiko. Then, he moved onto Marcus. He read it through. Put it aside.

...Monique?

He opened hers, and there was her friendly, bubbly handwriting, written in those gel pens that she favored so much...more of the same. He didn't finish hers, opening up Rawr's, glancing at it. Put them both aside.

Then, one by one, he went through the rest. More of the same...

Then he opened Korekiyo’s letter and...okay.

That was different. No, well, it was more of the same, but...it made no sense for Korikeyo. It was barely legible, the man writing in black ink on black paper, but, that was dumb, because Korekiyo enjoyed using this type of paper for a very specific reason. Maybe...he was counting on someone not knowing that?

Kaito looked around. "Do we have any lighters or anything?"

Kokichi took a deep breath at the next letter. It was from one of the towns closer to the Dicea-Luminary border--it hadn't been a battlefield or anything, though Luminary had briefly tried occupying it. The militia members from there had already returned home and...well, not all of them returned.

The veterans had suggested an idea, which it sounded like the town was going to go through with regardless of anything else, but the letter was about getting word around to all of Dicea. They wanted to make a memorial sculpture, but, like...a linked one. Something that could be made in every town, each having the next section of the sculpture, to honor those who had been lost in the war, and to celebrate the strength and unity of Diceans. To justify the choices of those who'd left to fight.

...it sounded like a good idea to him. An acknowledgment like that, for the whole country...the people who gave their lives for Dicean independence and the people who lost them, all the people of the nation that would feel that loss; they would not be forgotten or pushed aside. They would be properly honored and remembered for their sacrifices, making sure that people would remember that horrible war before declaring one ever again.

Kokichi nodded a little to himself. He'd have to talk to Aiichi about it, and likely they'd talk back and forth with the border town, asking about specific designs of the sculptures, but...this was something that would be good for everyone, he thought.

Blinking up at Kaito for a moment, having to take a second to process the question, Kokichi nodded and got up to go over to the closet. Along with knives, not many people trusted him with fire, but a lighter was easier for him to hide. In a pair of shorts that had a ton of hidden pockets, Kokichi retrieved the small lighter, handing it out to Kaito after limping lightly back over.

He looked down at the black piece of paper in front of Kaito for a moment before his expression lit up, distracted from the ache of his body and heart. "Someone sent you a secret message?! That's so cool!"

Kaito looked up at him...and grinned.

"Yeah!" he said, chuckling. "An old friend of mine from my first year of uni likes to use this particular kind of black paper. He explained to me once how it worked, but honestly I didn't really get it. Something about the heat melting the parts of the letters touched with a particular kind of chemical? Like, you have to write on it with a real specific kind of pen for it to work...he used to leave me little notes like these all the time when we were going out," Kaito said, remembering it affectionately, "which was dumb because this paper is like, kind of hard to get? And he would just write things like 'have a good day' and stuff. It was cute."

Kaito looked up at Kokichi and then winked at him, holding the letter to his chest protectively. "No peeking, 'Kichi. He went through all the trouble of sending me a secret message; it'd be kind of shitty if I just showed it to anyone."

Chuckling, Kaito lifted the paper over the flame, patiently waiting for the heat to collect and change the paper. Making sure to get it all over, he looked it over before letting Kokichi get the smallest look. "See? White letters now. Cool, huh? He had all kinds of tricks like that. Spent a lot of time traveling overseas when he was growing up and just picked up all sorts of weird things."

Trying not to let the exhaustion show on his face, Kaito read the letter, which went as followed:

Kaito. First of all, I am sorry that my first time reaching out to you in two years is over such an ugly business. Please forgive me. I hope you are doing well.

A very unpleasant pair of people have come to my home, and are, in fact, currently watching me write this. Well, no, they think I am making corrections to the version that you see written in plain black ink with a different pen, and are currently making fun of my choice to use black ink on black paper. They are not the brightest individuals.

However, their lack of intelligence is why I have decided to take their threats against myself and my sister (I'm certain she would say hi, if she knew I was writing to you. She was always quite fond of you. Please do feel free to come visit us if you are ever in Luminary again.) seriously. They're too stupid to be trying to orchestrate this on their own, and I imagine getting rid of them with the many, many weapons in my home that they seem to be dismissing as decorations might only result in more being sent by those who control them, which I have no concrete proof of, but suspect to be Remnants of Despair.

So, again, forgive me.

I don't know what the point of the request is, other than to perhaps make you feel uncomfortable, but as you may have worked out yourself by now, I was tasked with essentially relaying a story to you in which you behaved shamefully or embarrassingly during one of our intimate moments together, and then tell you that you are somehow lesser or wrong for enjoying what I myself had done to you.

And while I trust your intelligence, Kaito, in case you don't understand my sometimes melodramatic musing: I think they're trying to get me to call you a slut and make you feel bad about it.

It's extremely silly.

Obviously, I immensely enjoyed our time together, and could not think of a moment in which I thought you acted in a way that would cause you embarrassment to be reminded of it. So I made up something halfway believable and trust that, on the extremely off chance you do not remember how to read these messages, you will simply know that I consider you quite exceptional, and that you have no reason to be ashamed of how we enjoyed our time together.

I am sorry that you are being harassed by these people. Do take care of yourself, and if there's anything I can do for you, please feel free to reach out to me.

Your first (and no doubt best) Dungeon Master,

and your friend.

Korekiyo

Kokichi looked over the paper in wonder, honestly amazed and impressed. He'd heard of quite a few techniques for relaying secret messages, had even tried a few methods himself, but seeing such a proper one in front of his own eyes? Wow... He could kind of see where Kaito's friend was coming from, though--if he had access to such a cool thing straight out of a spy novel, he'd use it all the time too.

He rolled his eyes a bit at Kaito's teasing, though he decided to answer back honestly. "I'm not gonna read your mail, geez--doing that without permission is illegal, and just sort of a shitty thing to do? At least for personal letters. If I want my burning curiosity sated, then I just gotta wait for Kai-chan to decide to share with me."

That didn't mean he couldn't just look at a piece of paper, though. With just a minute or two over the flame, white letters did, in fact, appear on the page. So cool. But Kokichi left Kaito to actually read the letter and limped his way back to their bed, musing softly to himself.

"Maybe the stationery store in town has something like that...though, if it's just up for anyone to use, it'd be easy to crack, and probably wouldn't be one of the cooler methods... Maybe someone at the store would know how to get the good stuff, then? Can't hurt to ask..."

"Mmhmmm," Kaito hummed, reading over the message again. Okay...well, that explained it then...he had...he hadn't known what to think of the other letters honestly.

Samuel had lied: specifically, he had referred to the second time they had ever had sex, which had caused Kaito no end of confusion before he had caught on the whole thing was a lie, since the two had only ever slept together once. Then he had written that he had always thought it was gross, how badly Kaito had wanted to call him 'Master', and that now that Kaito was safely half in another kingdom, that he wanted to tell him so.

Never happened.

Thank goodness Kaito had opened Samuel's letter first, because it really set the tone for the others, some of whom, while clearly trying to not be as cruel as they could be, hadn't thought to just make up a story.

Marcus had told the story of their time at the park, and then called Kaito a creep for fucking him when he knew he was engaged. That bit was probably the part meant to clue Kaito in, since Marcus had hidden his engagement when they started dating and had apologized profusely to him when his fiance had eventually found out and tried to kill Kaito. Hard to mess up that kind of detail.

Monique, sweet soul that she was, had told a true story, but got real lackluster when it came to the 'make him feel bad about it' part. At some point the writing style just straight up changed, and Kaito had feeling they had just finished the letter on her behalf, matching her handwriting but otherwise sounding nothing like herself.

Rawr's was...almost believable. If he had read his first, Kaito might have actually been worried that he had left some horrible impression on his old friend and was only just now finding out about it. Honestly, Rawr had probably just done his best to fulfil the request out of concern for Monique. Kaito forgave him.

Sahara had written like she was furious, and she probably had been, annoyed at whoever was making her write. She, like Samuel and Korekiyo, had made something up. Bailsong had...okay, she was actually probably being mostly sincere in her letter, using it as a chance to vent about the parts of their relationship she hadn't liked (You were ALWAYS FLIRTING WITH OTHER PEOPLE!). Saber had told a true story, but there had been no emotion in the telling of it. Just doing the bare minimum of what he was told.

Chad...heh. God, what a...Chad had done as he was told, told a real story, made fun of Kaito...and then went on to ask Kaito how he was doing, heard you were getting married, congratulations dude, have fun in Dicea, just...

Kaito snorted. Fucking Chad. He was such a weird mix of douche and bro and Kaito had never been able to hold a grudge against him.

Heh...heh...sigh.

So...what was happening then?

It was all so bizarre, so out of nowhere, that Kaito didn't know what to think about any of this. The letters by themselves weren't terribly alarming. Or, at least not with all of his friends trying their best to clue him in that they were being coerced...but...

...someone had taken the time to find a bunch of his old flames and...threaten them...

"Phew," Kaito said, leaning on the desk, placing his head in his good hand, just...really uncertain what to think. "Man. A lot of people to reply to...might leave it for later… Um...hey, Kokichi?" he said, looking over at his husband, feeling just...stress starting to build up the more he thought about this. They had all been threatened...Korekiyo said they had been in his home... "Do you...have you heard anything about this Remnants of Despair stuff?"

Kokichi looked up from the managerial letters and just...blinked at Kaito for a moment. "...Remnants of Despair?" he questioned, wanting to make sure he heard correctly. He'd...never heard of anything like that. The leftovers of...tragedy, he guessed? There would be issues with the reintegration of veterans, he was well aware, but...most people were still traveling home. And...wouldn't disgruntled veterans want some kind of compensation? Instead of naming themselves something negative like that...

"...no, what is it?" he asked, setting his letters aside and focusing on Kaito, trying to lean on his side a little to put less strain on his hips. His mouth was set in a slight frown, confused and worried, but expectant of whatever Kaito had to say about it.

Kaito looked over at his husband...why was he...why was he leaning like that?

...damn it. Was he hurting again?

...fuck, fuck, fuck, Kaito, you're fucking up, you have to be a good husband, good husbands don't fucking let their husbands just exist in pain do something.

No...Kokichi didn't like it when Kaito didn't tell him stuff though...he doesn't like things being kept from him.

...s-so he'd just tell him all the...extra stuff later then. It was like with Byakuya's letter; Kaito wasn't hiding it from Kokichi. He was just...gonna give it to him later.

Slightly reassured, Kaito picked up Kaede's letter. "It's something my cousin brought up. I guess there's some...terrorist group? Running around my kingdom now. I mean, you know, the Luminary Kingdom. Says they're running around committing murder-suicides," Kaito sighed. "Just wanted to know if you had heard anything about it?"

King Aiichi. Byakuya had specifically ordered him to tell King Aiichi if he was contacted by anyone discussing the Remnants. He...he probably should at least bring the king Korekiyo’s and Kaede’s letters then.

That was...going to be uncomfortable...

A terrorist group?! Open concern shown on Kokichi's face though... He couldn't tell Kaito that. With so many of the...okay, of the horrible things Kaito had told him about Luminary, Kokichi had found himself justifying that there had to be good things going on too, or the people would rise up. Kaito's cousin had said "terrorist," but...she was part of the ruling family. Anything against them would be considered terrorism.

...maybe this was the people rising up.

But murder-suicides?! Revolutions were rarely peaceful, as, if there was a peaceful solution, there wouldn't be a need for revolution, but... They're not your people, Kokichi. There's nothing you can do for them.

Chewing on his lip, Kokichi hummed sadly. "I hadn't... Is your family going to be okay?" Even if he didn't agree with how they led, and...honestly kind of thought that there needed to be a change, that didn't mean that the Momotas should die. Not by any stretch. "If it's just happening in Luminary, you'll probably be okay here, but...we should be careful when we go out. Just...keeping alert, you know?"

That would...definitely make things more dangerous. Kaito would be targeted not only by those who hated Luminary, but...also maybe by those who loved it. Thankfully, most people didn't care enough to side with either extreme, but...still. It'd be better to be cautious.

Sitting back up, unfortunately, Kokichi began to push himself off the bed, gritting his teeth past the soreness in his knees. "I can see if we've gotten any news about them, though."

"Whoa, whoa, hey, come on," Kaito said, immediately getting up to go offer Kokichi an arm, looking down at him in concern as he watched the tension rise on Kokichi's face from moving.

"Where are we going? I'm sorry, I shouldn't have brought it up right now, 'Kichi, there's no need to do anything about it. It's not like they're storming the gates or anything. I was literally just about to offer to put more of that massage stuff on you...news can wait till tomorrow, can't it?"

Pouting a bit, Kokichi looked down and away. He knew he did have a tendency to over-worry about...everything? There was so much he couldn't do a thing about, and more that people thought he couldn't do a thing about so...he just wanted people to be safe and happy. A group going around Luminary performing murder-suicides was the opposite of that, but...Kaito was right. It wasn't like he could go out and stop the...Remnants of Despair himself.

With a sigh, he looked back up at Kaito and looped his arm around the offered one, squeezing Kaito close for a moment. "No, I'm glad you told me--I would hate to only find out about it after...like, a greater tragedy happened. I know there's not much I can do, but...we'll keep you safe, Kai-chan. And I'm sure Aiichi has heard about it and has just kept me out of the loop," he rolled his eyes in frustration, "But if your family needs something from us, we're allies. I need to talk to him about some business anyway--I'll ask if he's heard from your family recently."

"...but it doesn't have to be now." Looking put out, Kokichi conceded and sat back down on their bed, carefully as to not provoke any extra pain. "...if you wouldn't mind at least getting it...I think I could use more of that massage oil... I put it on my wrists and shoulders, and the bath kinda helped everything else that you didn't touch too, but, um... My hips and knees are starting to hurt again."

Kaito threw a grin back on his face, just...relieved that Kokichi was willing to settle back down. H-he was capable of anything, of course! But...he didn't have to be.

Kaito grabbed both sides of Kokichi's head, giving him a long kiss, breaking it to wink down at him. "Take off your pants and stuff then. Nothing weird, I promise, I just want to help you put it on onto your hips. Be right back."

Kaito went to the bathroom to grab the oil, glancing at Korekiyo's letter real quick...later. He'd bring it to King Aiichi later. He wasn't disobeying anyone. He was just...prioritizing one responsibility over another. It was fine.

While he kissed back, of course, Kokichi sighed a bit as they parted, not feeling great about the situation, but, like, who would? It was horrible. But there was nothing he could do, and stressing out over it would only stress out everyone around him too.

...they should tell Maki and Shuuichi, though, and figure out the best way to tell Timothy. They weren't parts of the royal family, officially, but they still were all employed by the crown and...that might be enough for some people. Giving them an idea of the kind of things to look out for would be a big help if anything happened.

Shuffling out of his sweatpants and briefs, Kokichi rolled onto his stomach in the most comfortable position he could find, crossing his arms under his chin. "When you talked to him, do you know if Shuu-chan's gonna be around in the castle for the rest of the day?" he called out. "We should let him and Maki-chan know to, you know...be on guard for more than...anti-Luminary sentiment."

He grimaced a bit to himself, not liking that that was a thing, but! It was. So they had to deal.

"Um, I don't think he was going anywhere?" Kaito called back, grabbing the container and bringing it back with him, smiling to see Kokichi already undressed and waiting for him. Just, total trust. "We can talk to them about it...maybe during dinner? We did miss lunch, after all. Everyone will probably be there."

Opening the massage oil, Kaito put it down on top of his closed book, dipping his hand in and running his fingers around the cool liquid, his nose wrinkling slightly at the tangy smell. It wasn't bad smelling, just clearly...'other' smelling, and Kaito found himself glad he hadn't tried to put it on Kokichi's dick. It would have sucked to lick that.

Sitting down next to Kokichi, he decided to start with the hips, though he planned to get it everywhere, really. Careful not to push too hard, since his hips were already hurting him, Kaito rubbed the oil into his skin slowly, happy to offer Kokichi any relief as he said, absentmindedly, "Ya know, you keep asking about my family, but...it's okay. They're fine. Kaede says it's some sort of philosophy group or something. Nihilism and decadence, I think, were the words she used. She thinks they're gonna just end up killing themselves off as a group. So, ya know...kind of a self-fixing problem."

Even more importantly, Byakuya had told him not to worry about it. And Kaito trusted Byakuya, so...yeah. Kaito wasn't concerned about the group much...

...

...why the letters though!?

Why threaten his ex's for some half-thought out attempt to, what...make Kaito feel bad about himself? What was the point of that? What were they hoping to gain?

...Maybe he should tell Kokichi...it was more fucking head games, and Kaito was awful at those. Kokichi's perspective might help...

...later. He'd tell him later.

Reaching out to grab some more oil onto his hands, he started moving the oil down Kokichi's legs.

Kokichi found himself sighing softly as Kaito began to rub the oil into his skin, after a moment feeling the relaxant start to do its thing and seep into him. Ahh...okay, yeah, that was a lot better. He'd toughed out the painful days plenty, but getting relief was blessed. So, even if he was still worried...he could pull focus away from it to put his efforts towards the things he could change.

"Nihilism and decadence, huh? Mmm... There's nuance that can go - ahh - into that, but essentially it's just a recipe for being an asshole. Being mean to people for selfish, idiotic reasons without caring about any consequences..." But if they were murdering people outside of the philosophy...the only thing differentiating the Momotas from any random person in Luminary were walls and guards. Which could be pretty damn effective but...people were still dying. He hoped Kaito's family would still address that...

...but at least, with that reasoning, it didn't seem like the violence would be targeted against any one group. So just...mindfulness for everyone, then. Kokichi wouldn't be surprised if his father had already sent out such a PSA like that.

They'd be okay.

Little sounds continued to escape Kokichi's mouth as Kaito massaged him, more than just the two areas he'd mentioned, but...that was fine by him. Those were just the worst spots among the general aches in his body. He let out a particularly pleased sigh when Kaito got to his knees, though, the pain being soothed away by his husband's skilled hand...and special massage oil, but still. "There...please..." he murmured when Kaito reached one of the particularly painful spots.

Ahhh...that...wasn't fair.

Kaito felt himself blush, but did as requested, grabbing some more oil and focusing on that spot in particular. He felt the stiffness in the muscle, especially now that Kokichi had pointed it out, and made small, soothing circles around it, making extra effort to press into the edge of the muscle, relenting only after he felt it smooth out, then rubbing up and down it, exploring it with his fingertips before he felt another tense little bump, focusing on that once next.

He kept going like that, his own hand feeling a little...weird. After being coated in the oil for so long, but he was patient and just ignored it, focusing on spreading the oil to the other leg, now that he was fairly certain he had gotten the problem spot. He did more or less the same thing on the other side, listening dutifully to any small noise or request from Kokichi that indicated he should be focusing somewhere in particular.

As Kaito ran his hands up and down Kokichi, he...suddenly had a flash of Samuel's letter. How Samuel had mocked Kaito wanting to call him 'master', had fabricated an 'embarrassing' scenario where Kaito had just wanted to be controlled.

That hadn't happened with Samuel, but...that didn't mean similar things hadn't happened before...plenty of his partners had made him beg and call them things...

...did Samuel really think that was super embarrassing behavior?

Kaito furrowed his brow and shook his head, shaking the thought from his head. It didn't matter. Of course it didn't matter. Kaito had nothing to be ashamed of. He made people feel good. There was nothing wrong with that.

Kaito focused on the massage, deciding to go down to Kokichi's feet and press his thumb against the bottom muscles, because, fuck it, he had the oil anyway, why not just do all of it? "Let me know if anything still hurts," Kaito murmured, leaning over to kiss Kokichi's knee, "I'll take care of you."

It wasn't long before Kokichi felt himself melting into the mattress again, the pain once again forced to leave his body. He'd never been this comfortable on pain days before. When he was little and had even less of a pain tolerance, sure, Ikuo would draw him a warm bath, and would hold him close, but Kokichi had been crying into his nanny's trademark soft sweaters from how much pain he'd been in when he hadn't just fallen into fitful bouts of sleep.

Now? It was more than being comforted through the day. Kaito was making it relaxing. Kokichi hummed in response to Kaito's murmur, taking a few solid seconds to process the words before an affectionate smile grew on his face. "Thanks, Kai-chan... You didn't have to do any of this, but...I appreciate that you did. Maybe I can learn a thing or - nnmmmahhh... - or two from the massage master himself, and can help you some time if you're sore after training or something."

That sounded nice. Kokichi certainly didn't have as much strength in his hands, but he wasn't a total weakling. He could probably give a satisfying massage if he tried!! And anything he could do to make Kaito feel as good as this was something he'd definitely try for. He was already getting better at making his husband feel good in other ways... With the slow, comfortable pace they'd had earlier, maybe Kokichi wouldn't feel as overwhelmed and would be able to just...take care of Kaito too. Or...maybe...he could figure out the best way to finger himself without getting overly aroused, so Kaito could take pleasure in his body without having to prep him first! ...though he did threaten some...interesting things if Kokichi used the vibrator wand on himself...

Kokichi let out another breathy sigh, his body splayed out on the bed, his lower half slightly glistening from the oil. "I love you, Kai-chan..."

Kaito snickered, feeling comforted by Kokichi's obvious enjoyment. At least he understood how this stuff worked. "Probably not. I've never actually had the patience to sit through a massage. I get restless trying to hold still that long, ya know?" he admitted, not adding that he was a little like that for...kind of everything. Then he smirked, leaving Kokichi's legs, leaning over to grin wolfishly down at him as he teased, "Well, maybe not as restless as some of us get, when we're supposed to be holding still..." before kissing him again, parting his lips with his tongue and enjoying the taste of him, tracing his still oil covered hand lightly over Kokichi's neck.

It...probably would do Kaito no favors to admit to Kokichi that everything he teased Kokichi for, his inability to not push ahead and try to speed things along when he got really excited, was all stuff Kaito struggled with too. Korekiyo had tried his damn best to teach him, certainly, but living in and enjoying the moment was hard when everything inside you wanted to push and grab and hurry and move. Kaito had learned a few tricks for it, sure, but only because Korekiyo had used those tricks on him constantly to get him to, just, slow the fuck down.

But that was Kaito's little secret. For now, he enjoyed getting to poke fun at Kokichi, like he wasn't throwing stones in glass houses. And, frankly, now that he was on the other side of it, he was pretty sure he was giving Korekiyo too much credit on how composed he always was. It was SO MUCH easier to keep a cool head when you were the one who knew what was going to happen next.

Like, for instance, how nothing was going to happen after this. Kaito broke the kiss and placed a soft peck on Kokichi's forehead. "I love you too. Feeling better?" he asked, "If so, I'm gonna go wash my hands and then run out for a second, okay?"

Kaito didn't want to wait until after dinner to bring the letter to King Aiichi. He was pretty sure if he waited too long, he'd convince himself this was something he could just perpetually put off, like Byakuya's letter and telling Kokichi that maaaaaaybe Kaito was kind of, sort of??? being targeted by the group he had just assured Kokichi was in no way an immediate danger to them. Maybe? Kaito seriously didn't understand what was going on, honestly, but at the very least he had to do what Byakuya had told him to do in regards to passing along information.

Kokichi snorted and happily kissed back, though he let Kaito support him mostly, too relaxed to want to do anything but just lie on their bed in a puddle. "I'm getting better, jerk. It doesn't help that you're a huge tease, but, woe is me, I love it." With a little laugh, he put in just a little bit of effort to peck Kaito one more time before dropping back to the bed.

Honestly, Kokichi didn't want his excitement to ever fade. ...maybe just enough to make sure neither of them hurt themselves, but other than that? How Kaito made him feel when they were together was something magical, and Kokichi wanted to bask in it as long as he could. He could handle a little teasing over how into banging his husband he was.

Humming in affirmation, Kokichi closed his eyes for a moment and took a deep breath, enjoying the feeling of not being in pain. "Way better. Kai-chan's way too good to me, and I'm not gonna wanna do anything but lounge in bed at this rate, but considering I'd be stuck in bed anyway, I'll gladly take this reality."

After a moment of lazy consideration, Kokichi pulled his briefs back up, only to sprawl himself partially on his side and take up as much of the bed as he could--which still wasn't that much, but still. "I feel selfish asking for my cuddle-buddy to spend all day with me, but...I like bein' around ya. That said, take your time with whatever Kai-chan's gotta do--you know where I'll be, shishi." He giggled a bit more, tugging a pillow closer to press into.

"Pfff, I'm only going to be gone for a little bit. You basically will have me all day. Seriously, you're so greedy," Kaito scolded, looking Kokichi over and feeling confident that his husband wasn't holding back and was, in fact, okay.

Kaito went to wash his hand off in the bathroom, looking over himself real quick. He looked alright. Nothing that would embarrass him in front of King Aiichi...

...ugh. Kaito didn't want to do this. He should just tell Kokichi instead and forget about the king. Kokichi was his husband; between him and his, ugh, 'father', at least in law, Kaito would much prefer Kokichi to know something like this had happened. But...Byakuya had said to keep the king informed. And, if Kaito told Kokichi now, all the effort he had put into helping him relax today would probably fall apart. And Kaito still had a really hard time predicting beforehand how Kokichi was going to react to anything… Kaito, and his friends, had already accidentally triggered too many meltdowns in such a short time...Kaito couldn't trust himself to guess.

Tomorrow. If Kokichi felt better tomorrow, Kaito would tell him everything.

Besides, things would be way more under control by tomorrow anyway. Shuuichi was likely working on the informant issue right now, and Kaito trusted he'd figure it out quickly, and, well, beyond telling the king about what happened, there wasn't anything that could actually be done about the...what to call them? Weirdo suicide freaks? Remnants? Sure, there was nothing to do about the Remnants anyway.

So, everything taken care of, really.

Kaito said one last, "Be right back, Kichi!" to his husband before grabbing Korekiyo’s and Kaede's letters, heading out.

Kaito glanced around, actually half expecting to see Maki and Shuuichi around outside their rooms, since he hadn't really seen much of either of them today...but no. Oh well. He'd see them at dinner. Then, after dinner, he'd at least tell Maki and Shuuichi what was going on. Honestly, that would be a relief. He trusted they'd know what to do.

Kaito asked a few random staff members that he didn't recognize (it was easier to be friendly to the staff that he didn't really know anything about, for some reason, though presumably everyone in the castle was guilty of the things that made Kaito so furious with the ones he did recognize. Better not to think about it.) if anyone had any idea where the king might be. He got one or two annoying, "You mean, the boss?"s from a few of them, but eventually the best guesses he got was that he was in his office.

Kaito headed there, knocking.

Things were...okay, for the most part. Reports of disgruntled or violent people were few, and most of those few were just...regular stuff. Things you just had to expect from the vast opportunities of life. Actual reports of Remnant activity...were mostly out of the country. For Dicea, that was good! Best case, actually. But ideologies could spread like wildfire in the right conditions, and while he'd spent his entire life doing everything he could to prevent those conditions, it was still possible. And so they had to remain vigilant.

Aiichi perked up from his work at a knock on his door, having a better idea of who it would be on the other side, and, after he opened it, he was proven correct. Aiichi gave his son-in-law a kind smile and stepped to the side, opening the door wider, just as he had the last time. "Good afternoon, Kaito; it's a pleasure as always."

He gave the new bandages on the man's hand a look, as well as the papers in his hand. Ah...perhaps Byakuya had sent Kaito a letter as well? Aiichi had sent out his own response that morning, but it was still worth talking about, regardless of how absurd it was.

"Please, make yourself comfortable. What can I help you with today?"

Kaito once again found himself in conflict with his need to be respectful in, like, an official way, but to also speak familiarly with the king, as his grace himself desired...and again found himself just settling on just trying not to call him anything. "Thank you. Is...is now a good time? I can come back."

Kaito sat down in one of the chairs in front of the king's desk, fidgeting with the letters in his hand, uncertain how he wanted to go about this. Should he try to just...explain or...ugh, whatever, just give it to him, it didn't matter either way. Kaito wasn't embarrassed.

His face flushing slightly red, Kaito passed both letters to the king's desk as he said, "Um, Prince Byakuya said that if anyone contacted me about the Remnant of Despair group, to let you know. The pink envelope is just my cousin letting me know what's happening with them in the kingdom, but the black one is...uh...maybe a little more relevant. I just...I'm just letting you know, your grace."

"I am always free to speak with anyone who wants to, Kaito. Please don't fret about ever just coming into my office for whatever reason; I'm always happy to hear you out." The boss smiled at the prince, though that expression dropped when the matter at hand was revealed, Aiichi's eyes widening in alarm for a moment.

He looked down at the two letters for a moment--ah, the black one had been hidden--before shuffling them together with a nod. Normally he'd read them later, but since they were personal letters to Kaito, it'd be better to read through them and return them right away. So that's what Aiichi did. The information in Lady Kaede's letter was nothing he didn't know, but the second...

Aiichi's lips pressed together in a familiarly grim expression as he handed the letters back, though he looked over Kaito in concern. "...thank you for sharing this information with me. I'm sorry to have to put you in this position, Kaito, but...other than this letter from your friend, have you been threatened? Any way you can think of."

Kaito thought about the cuts on his hand, the long line of people who had waited their turn to do so... and the roof tile back in town...but none of that probably had anything to do with the Remnants. It was just, ya know...Dicea/Luminary stuff. Kaito couldn't help but assume the roof tile was an impulsive action from some kid, and, again, the only reason he had allowed the thing at the party to happen at all was he was hoping everyone there would feel satisfied with it. So, like, no further danger there, right?

Besides, there was no way to bring up the stuff that happened at the party without, uh, bringing up the party, so...yeah.

Still, lying even by omission directly in the face of an authority figure made Kaito profoundly uncomfortable, and he found himself staring somewhere over Aiichi's shoulder as he said, "Um...I got, I think, eight other letters like Korekiyo's, though none of the other letters brought up the group. They were all just written like Korekiyo was told to write his. So, I guess, like...nine of my old friends in total were approached by them and threatened." And, now that Kaito thought about it...he actually had no idea what conditions all those old friends were actually left in, once the letters were written...the thought made Kaito's already fraying nerves worse as he said, looking down at his lap now, "Uh...I can't...nothing else comes to mind..."

...did...did the stuff that happened between himself and Head Secretary Tengan count? All of that already felt like such a long time ago now, though it had only been a few weeks. And, the head secretary had seemed to lose interest in him entirely, once the plan to get Kaito to perform treason had so quickly fallen apart...

...Tengan was his father's representative. Kaito couldn't tell his father's most hated enemy any of that stuff. It'd be a betrayal.

Aiichi's brow furrowed a bit. It wasn't the worst case, but nine of Kaito's friends were in danger. It would be much easier to ensure their protection if they were Dicean citizens, but for Luminary citizens?

"...these letters may be an indication that your friends may be held as hostages in the future. You and Ko are already high-profile targets, but now that they've contacted you specifically..." Aiichi shook his head a little, frustration showing in how he lightly tapped on his desk. "I will do what I can for your friends, but if there is anyone you can safely contact to try and provide them protection, I would recommend doing that."

With a sigh, some of Aiichi's expression smoothed, though there was now a tinge of regret in it. "Also, I am sorry to do this to you two, but, obviously, the situation is different. Traveling all the way to Danganronpa--where there have been more abundant reports of Remnant activity--is too dangerous right now. If things don't escalate in Dicea, a trip to one of our coasts may be alright, but I don't want either of you going anywhere near our borders for your safety."

Ko would throw a full-sized tantrum at that, but it was necessary. He would come to understand.

"On the less dire side of things..." Aiichi let the tension in his expression fade, looking over Kaito curiously. "I received a letter from your brother. While many of the things in it seem to be the result of faulty rumors... Kaito, if you need anything, please feel free to ask. If you would like a separate bedroom or any private space of your own, we can certainly make that happen. You're a resident of the castle, and you're certainly entitled to ask for anything that would make it more of a home for you."

Kaito found himself actually looking at the king now, shocked.

...oh fuck...fuck...

...what was he going to tell Kokichi??

Kaito bit the inside of his lip, his mind racing now. Shit, shit, shit. God fucking damn it, he shouldn't have come down here. He should have stayed upstairs with Kokichi. Kaito couldn't keep news like this to himself, it was too important to Kokichi. The trip was canceled? Or...no, no, not canceled, but...fuck!

Kaito barely heard the second part, though he felt a swirl of exasperated guilt at the mention of his brother. "Yes sir, sorry about that. Byakuya...he means well," Kaito murmured, before giving the king an openly confused look. "Separate bedroom? No, I don't need any extra space like that, all of my stuff fits into Kokichi's room just fine. Oh, um, though me and Kokichi were talking about repurposing a closet up on the fourth floor as a shrine to Atua, if that's alright..."

Kaito shook his head. He didn't really care about any of that right now. Instead, trying to endear himself, he tried, "Uh...boss? I really...is the trip being cancelled a permanent thing? The Remnants have only shown up, you know, these last few weeks, as far as I'm aware...they could just as quickly disappear? Neither my cousin nor Byakuya seemed to think they posed much of a threat."

Aiichi nodded in understanding. The impression he got from the Luminary Heir Apparent was that, while he did care for his brother, and anyone would be concerned with such rumors, he was used to a certain type of reality and wasn't willing to pay attention to others unless severe evidence was provided. Considering he'd been taught to not listen to others and take all responsibility upon himself...well. He was young. The climate in Luminary wasn't conducive for it, but he hoped the young man would learn.

"Ah, I had been meaning to talk with you about that. Your plans for the shrine are perfectly alright, of course! But I've been speaking with Atuans in town about the most appropriate way to create a respectful space for worship. I would love to have your input as well, and before we settle on anything I'll likely come to you anyway about it."

From what he'd learned about the faith from Priestess Angie, it seemed less like a religion and more of a...justification for the Momotas' authority, but people did treat it as a religion. So, he would accommodate. There were plenty of parts of Atuan faith that didn't actually have to do with Luminary, so he couldn't disregard that faith just because of a few opportunistic parts.

He was willing to actually try and make the peace between Dicea and Luminary work, despite what the Momotas did.

Aiichi sighed softly and regarded Kaito with sympathy. "Believe me, Kaito, I wish I could send you two off on an adventure in good faith. And, no, keeping you two from the borders isn't a permanent thing. Despite what your cousin and brother think of the situation...people are still dying. You were overtly threatened. If the Remnants put in the effort to find people close to you and send such a layered message, instead of what seems to be their MO of just destroying everything in sight...then they have more of a plan than just senseless violence. It would be irresponsible and callous of me to offer you and Ko to them on a silver platter."

"If all of our nations on this continent can work to silence the platform the Remnants of Despair are creating and can protect our people, then, yes, the group will be of no threat, and then I will be happy to help you two travel wherever you wish. Until then, though, we must exert caution. Given the space, evil will grow, no matter how small it might seem. I will not allow either of you to be hurt by them, nor will I allow them to hurt others by using you." Aiichi closed his eyes for a moment with that vow before offering Kaito a sad smile. "I know it's not fair. I'm sorry."

...all nations on the continent unite?

...oh, come on!? Kokichi couldn't be expected to wait for it to be entirely safe, literally everywhere! That was never going to happen! There was always going to be something!

Kaito gripped his good(-ish) hand into a fist, feeling the anger starting to build up...but he couldn't risk arguing. Kokichi said he had never so much as been out of the castle, officially, before their trip out to town. If this Remnant bullshit had just lost them their trip out of the kingdom, then Kaito couldn't risk saying anything that would make the king decide to restrict travel within the borders as well.

Trip to the coast, huh...okay...that was something. It was still away from this castle and these people and this person. It would be enough of a chance for Kokichi to prove he didn't need these restrictions. It could still work.

Kaito still didn't know what the responsible answer was, when it came to the temple. He didn't want to put his people in the uncomfortable position of choosing to honor their faith or keep themselves out of public eye...but the fact that it was the king of Dicea organizing it probably meant it would be fine either way. So he said, "I'd be happy to help with the temple in any way...thank you for thinking of us."

Pressing his good hand’s joints into his chest, Kaito clarified, "I can still tell Kokichi we're going on a trip though? We're just going to the coast now?"

"That's correct, yes," Aiichi nodded. "I really would rather you stay close by, but...you were right with your initial request, Kaito. As much as I would like to ensure that my son will be safe, I cannot keep him in the castle forever. I know Ko will be upset regardless, but I hope you two will enjoy what Dicea has to offer while things are dangerous."

Ko was growing up into a responsible young man. As much as his health terrified Aiichi, that every time Ko collapsed he could only see his baby barely hanging onto life...he had to acknowledge that. Ko was going to guide their friends one day, and he was going to be amazing at it. If Aiichi thought that was true, which he whole-heartedly did, then he had to trust that his son wouldn't just up and die every time he stepped out of the castle.

"Ah, and if you wouldn't mind..." Aiichi grinned sheepishly at Kaito. "I received word from the front lines--those from the castle who volunteered to fight are on their way back. I'm sure Ko would be happy to hear that Ikuo will likely be back in...maybe three weeks? Thereabouts. I can tell him myself at dinner, but if you're going to see him sooner..."

...the front line fighters were returning in three weeks.

...he'd warn Maki, Shuuichi and Tim tonight. Give everyone time to prepare.

"Of course, sir! Kokichi will be thrilled! It will be nice to finally meet the famous Ikuo!" Kaito's grin turned a tad...sharp as he said, not exactly with any kind intent in mind, "He really adores that guy. Talks about him all the time. It's really something else."

Kaito stood up, reaching over to take his letters back, duty done. Bowing his head slightly towards the king, he said, "Thank you for your time. Please excuse me, I definitely want to go give Kokichi the good news as soon as possible. He'll be thrilled. May I go?"

And hopefully that would soften the edge of the bad news Kaito also had to bring him.

Aiichi nodded with a fond smile. It would be wonderful to see everyone again, but he knew that Ikuo returning was something particularly special. When he'd first left, Ko had cried for days on end, refusing to eat or be seen by anyone. After he'd nearly drowned himself, Aiichi had to remove the lock from his door and force Ko from his room. It had been horrible for everyone. But now that Ikuo was coming back? He could just imagine the delight and excitement.

"You may, Kaito. I appreciate you coming to talk with me, even if it's not over the most pleasant topics. See you at dinner." Aiichi got up to open the door for his son-in-law, bidding him farewell before returning to his work.

--

Kokichi wasn't sure if he could keep dozing, but it was still comfortable to just lie in bed. Everywhere Kaito had massaged felt better than he did even on a normal day! He really would qualify as being greedy if he asked for massages more often, but if he had other painful days in the future, he at least knew of something that would make him feel better.

That wasn't to say Kokichi did nothing while Kaito was away. He sorted out the management letters by what he had to do for them and set them aside to be dealt with later and...well. He took another muffin out of the bag. They were just so good! He kind of wanted to eat some candy too, but he did not want to get up, not with his legs feelin' all loose and comfy.

So he ate a third muffin. And the fourth and last, not quite feeling satisfied after the third, wanting to keep tasting that deliciousness. Honestly, he could really go for some more, but anything else required getting up, so he'd just have to be happy. And he was!

By the time Kaito was heading back to their room, Kokichi was lying on his back again, patting his tummy and, while it was a little weird, not thinking much about eating four muffins in just a few hours when dinner was coming up in a few more. He wondered what they were having...

Kaito gave their bedroom door a small knock of warning before waiting a second, then came in. "I'm back," he said, walking in and closing the door behind him...before snorting. "Why do you look like a kid who got his hands on a cookie jar?"

"Because I'm a kid who got my hands on a muffin bag," Kokichi shot back before opening his eyes and giving Kaito a smile. "Welcome back from your grand adventure, hun. Have any exciting tales to tell?"

He laughed a bit before rolling onto his side and holding his arms out. "Still too greedy to ask you to come join me? Kai-chan's gotten me so relaxed I don't wanna get up, like, at all so if I wanna cuddle my adorable husband, he's gotta come to me."

Kaito bit the inside of his lip again, tossing the letters back on the pile with all the others. Maybe this was all just...more news that could wait till tomorrow. Kokichi seemed to be genuinely happy right now...

Kaito turned back to his husband with a grin. "I mean, I guess if I gotta, then I gotta. Let me take off my pants though. I don't want your oil-covered legs to get all over them."

Kicking off his slippers and pants, Kaito crawled into bed with Kokichi, drawing Kokichi in close to him and letting himself sigh against the smaller man's body, immediately leaning in to kiss Kokichi on the forehead, and then into his hair, before letting his chin relax on the top of Kokichi's head. Kaito, just closing his eyes and just...enjoying this, for a moment. Trying to think.

"...Hey," he said, his eyes closed. "You've never been to a beach, have you?"

"Ah, such a noble sacrifice. Kai-chan really does love me, willing to take his pants off to cuddle. What did I ever do to deserve you?" Kokichi giggled again, eagerly pressing against Kaito when the larger man got into bed, beaming at the kisses and returning one to Kaito's neck when he was tucked against him. More than treats, Kokichi had come to crave his husband's touch more than anything.

And just Kaito in general, really.

Kokichi hummed questioningly for a moment before giving Kaito's neck another kiss. "Nope. There are ponds and, like, pools in town 'n stuff, but I've never really been to any major body of water."

"Not counting Fukawa's books, the ocean has always seemed like...a really cool place? Like, hanging out with friends on a beach and doing all that sort of stereotypical stuff, and then the utter vastness and mystery of the sea itself. I think I wanna go see it someday."

He wanted to see everything the world had to offer, honestly, but the ocean had always been an easy place to come to mind when he tried to quantify what that everything was. Probably a beach before the actual ocean, though. He'd never learned to swim, and though being on a boat would be a novel experience too, it'd probably be better to start with the safer stuff.

Kaito nodded, eyes still closed, thinking carefully as he spoke.

"Yeah, I had a dream about the ocean last night, so I was thinking about it...I was thinking about Timothy," Kaito said, inspiration striking, opening his eyes as he scooted back a bit to look down at Kokichi as he spoke. "About him going to school soon, and me, you, Maki, and Shuuichi kind of being, like...the only adults in his life right now that he trusts? Well...you know I want to go to Danganronpa with you, right? I really do. It's going to be an amazing trip-"

Someday.

"-but I was thinking...what if we all went somewhere a little closer for our first big trip away from the castle? Like, to the coast or something? A trip that won't take us, like, four months to get there, look around, and get back. Like, we could go to the coast, and have fun together there, seeing more of your kingdom, and since we're in near the end of the school year anyway," Kaito thought, making the assumption that schools took a break for the middle of summer the same way they did in Luminary, "Tim could come with us, and we could enroll him when we get back, and he wouldn't have to be in a new school, living here by himself while everyone he knows goes running off to another country."

Kaito paused here, wanting to get a read of how Kokichi might be reacting to all of this...

Kokichi's smile faded a bit at the...Timothy going to school thing. He'd thought of the damn thing, but he was just...worried about the boy being able to adjust.

...and Kaito's plan was addressing that. Kokichi blinked slowly, considering what his husband had proposed. He was looking forward to going to Danganronpa, and their month's wait was coming to an end, but everyone kept getting injured, and there was no way he wanted to start a big trip like that while people were hurt. ...and...if there was an extremist group in Luminary right now...maybe it'd be better to stay in Dicea for a bit, just so it'd be easy to get news.

He did want to see the coast. Danganronpa could wait.

Focusing his gaze back onto Kaito, Kokichi gave him a smile. "That sounds great, actually. For the closest coast, it'd be, maybe...a week's trip in all? Two days to get there, a few to actually enjoy our time there, and two days back."

"...even if you say he trusts me, I'm not sure Timothy particularly likes me at all, but, you're right. He's still been running away from Haneda, and...well, you've seen how he acts with everyone else, right? Maybe...getting out of the castle, but not right into school, will help him relax a bit. I'd hate to just abandon him for a vacation." Kokichi made a face, more directed at himself.

He'd been excited to, not only leave the castle, but leave the country, but...things were different from how they'd been just a few weeks ago. This was a good idea.

Kokichi pressed his lips to Kaito's for a moment, savoring the feeling. "Let's do it! I'm sure my father will still insist on a healer, but...maybe we can convince him that Shuu-chan knows enough medical stuff to be good enough? I guess we can figure all that out at dinner. Or after." He shrugged a bit, grinning at Kaito. "Whichever."

Kaito felt himself relax as Kokichi was immediately warm to the idea. There we go...ha! Further fucking proof that Kokichi wasn't, like, so fucking unreasonable that he had to be fucking locked away in his room to be protected! God, what was WRONG with everyone in this god damned castle? Kokichi wasn't fucking crazy. He was intelligent, and responsible, and if he wasn't entirely mature yet in everything he did, this was further proof that it sure as shit wasn't his fault.

Kaito kissed Kokichi back, smiling and snickering through it, feeling light and excited and good. "Give Tim time, he's warming up to you. He doesn't hate you, anyway, and he's sworn to you. Luminary people take vows like that seriously. It'll just take time and patience for that loyalty to evolve into actual affection."

"But good! It's decided! All five of us, plus maybe some random healer, are going on a beach trip! That'll be great! I'll have to work twice as hard at training; wanna get my beach body ready," Kaito chuckled.

Alright. The hard part was done and Kaito was pleased to immediately move on to the actual good news now. "I went to speak to King Aiichi, and he wanted me to let you know that he had gotten word about the front lines. Apparently, we should be expecting all front line fighters back in roughly three weeks. Congrats, 'Kichi. Your dad's coming back soon."

"He doesn't have to like me," Kokichi sighed. "And, I mean, I kind of have to be around him sometimes, but I just don't want to impose myself on him so much if it makes him uncomfortable. I know he needs time, but it feels like all the major changes are kinda time-sensitive." Schools would be starting the next term in...a little over a month? Maybe a month. Fuck, time was weird. And though things could change a lot in a month...he was still worried.

But he had to trust that it'd be okay.

Kokichi snorted and nudged his hip against Kaito's abs, raising an eyebrow. "Ooooh no you don't. You're gonna train within the limits of your body and let yourself finish healing. And, like, Kai-chan's already really hot? I can't believe you're not "beach body ready" already." And, really, he'd probably look great in a swimsuit no matter the state his body was in, as long as he was healthy.

Oh yeah... Swimsuits were a thing. He'd have to see if he could get one still...though, if he couldn't swim, he'd probably do nothing more than just stick by the edges of the waves, and he could do that in regular shorts.

Kokichi's musing was broken by-- "Really?!"

His whole face lit up, hope and longing in his expression though his eyes soon started to water with relieved tears. With a squeal of glee, Kokichi pulled Kaito into a bear hug, tucking his face into his husband's shoulder as he hiccuped giggles. "F-fuck...holy shit! I can't wait for you two to meet... MMMMM!!!!" He squirmed a bit in the hug, and if Kokichi had been a larger man, he might've rolled Kaito all around the bed in his enthusiasm.

Kaito laughed as he felt himself being squeezed, his husband suddenly a clutching, wiggling ball of excitement. "You and me both. I'm extremely curious what this intimidating 'bunny-man' is gonna be like...oh, shit, I get it! That's why he gave you smug-rabbit! That makes sense," Kaito said, looking genuinely pleased with himself.

"Smug-rabbit?" Kokichi asked, snickering. "Kai-chan, it's a stuffed animal. It doesn't have emotions. It doesn't even have eyebrows to indicate any kind of emotion. I have other stuffed animals too--what sort of personalities do they have, huh?"

He just continued to laugh for a moment before something came to him, and Kokichi snorted, raising a teasing eyebrow at his husband. "Wait...were you jealous of a stuffed animal? That I slept with it while you were away? Oh my god..." He couldn't handle it. Kaito had said the rabbit was his competition, but Kokichi had just thought Kaito was joking. Or, even more than he was now? Cute.

Kokichi calmed down enough to kiss Kaito, gently drawing his tongue across the seam of Kaito's lips, then placed a kiss to his cheek, his nose, his jaw, his neck... All the while rubbing a hand down Kaito's side. "Kai-chan, you're my husband, and I love you. You're my favorite cuddle-buddy and an inanimate object could never compare."

Feeling happy and relaxed and excited and loving and just! Kokichi felt a little bold and gently sucked a spot on Kaito's neck, his hand trailing down to touch over his husband's (as pretty as the rest of him) rear. "Promise."

"It looks smug! It's in the way the fur goes around its weird, beady black eyes!" Kaito insisted, flushing in embarrassment as he tried to insist that the rabbit was definitely designed to look slightly smug, and it wasn't, like, just Kaito totally projecting...

...and then Kaito blushed hotter, swallowing as Kokichi just lightly started to explore him, looking down at Kokichi in open surprise as his hands drifted down to places Kokichi wasn't in the habit of drifting, felt lips press against his neck and- "Hrn!"

Kaito's immediate reaction was pure instinct, at least in regards to his instincts when it came to Kokichi. Kaito found himself leaning in, putting his hand on Kokichi's shoulder and pushing him onto his back, kissing him back, deeper, rougher, just suddenly hungry, his chest pressing against Kokichi's as he breathed him in deeply...need and possession igniting in his stomach...

...but that was just the immediate reaction to being teased so unexpectedly. Kaito could still smell the massage oil, and that was a reminder to him that, as good as Kokichi felt right now, there was a reason all Kaito had been willing to do was blow him earlier today. He broke the kiss, looking down at Kokichi, just...struggling with his own need for a second...

Before kissing Kokichi on the forehead, pulling him close and resting his arm across Kokichi's chest, somewhat pinning him down as he ran soothing fingers through Kokichi's hair as he said, "Well...the rabbit still looks smug to me...but I'm glad to hear I win the cuddle competition."

Kaito's reaction wasn't entirely unexpected, considering how he acted whenever they got intimate, so Kokichi wasn't surprised when he was pushed onto his back and accommodated Kaito's more intense pace of kissing easily, a flush coming to his cheeks from making out and getting his breath stolen. It was...maybe mean to tease Kaito like this, but Kokichi wanted to be able to be affectionate and intimate more easily. To just...be able to make out for a little bit without them frantically pulling clothes off. To touch Kaito and make him blush or smirk or do whatever he was feeling at the moment. To physically be in a relationship that wasn't just about sex.

Though he really liked the sex too.

Kokichi, after debating with himself for a moment, gave one of Kaito's cheeks a parting squeeze before returning his hands to Kaito's back, giving his husband a somewhat breathless smile as they both cooled. "You'd win most competitions against my stuffed animals, Kai-chan. If anyone has a reason to be smug, it's you."

"Or me, because I get to call you my Kai-chan," he giggled softly, nuzzling as much as he could in Kaito's embrace.

Kaito grinned into his hair, feeling just...suddenly a lot of things. He held Kokichi close, breathing him in, warm and comfortable...and also slightly aroused and, he didn't understand why, but... slightly enraged? This intimate, excited moment raising his pulse, which just...wasn't going down now, that excited feeling turning into something anxious...

He was angry...not at anyone in particular... but also that being a lie, because a thousand small stresses throughout the day had hitched a ride in that moment of possessive need, demanding Kaito's attention.

He was mad at the stylist and the guard and the king and the people who had frightened his friends and he was mad at the people at the party and the kid on the roof and his father and his brother and Maki for hurting him and which made him feel guilty because she only did it because she loved him and Byakuya made him feel guilty too because he shouldn't be mad at his brother for taking an interest in his safety and he was mad at his parents because why had Byakuya needed to write them a letter on his behalf saying that the training sessions hadn't happened if they already knew about it!??

And he felt terrible, furious and guilty with himself, because he wasn't unhappy! He was happy and in love and so fucking confused...

Suddenly his eyes stung red.

...fuck.

Come on...really!?

Kaito grit his teeth, burying his face into the pillow beside Kokichi's head, just...biting his tongue as he held onto Kokichi. Pull it together, pull it together, you are Kaito Ouma Momota, you were born under Atua's star, you are blessed and loved and you are having a Good Day and everything is Fine!

Pull it together you piece of shit!

Now...that was a reaction he hadn't expected as much. For Kaito to just smother himself. Kokichi blinked over at him for a moment and then...gently rubbed Kaito's shoulder, not saying anything for a good few moments. He...honestly didn't know what this was about, if Kaito was just overwhelmed with Kokichi trying to be more affectionate, or if this was something else...

Conversations with Aiichi were rarely pleasant, in Kokichi's experience. And...Kaito had tried to cover it up, but something in the letters he'd been sent seemed to bother him. Not to mention, like, everything in Kaito's life was kind of a clusterfuck right now.

So Kokichi rubbed his shoulder, and after a long moment, started to speak. "...hey, Kai-chan? You do a lot for me, stuff no one else ever has, and...it means a whole lot to me. I keep thinking about how I could ever make it up to you, and I always just think that by just...making sure you're safe and trying to make you happy 'n stuff works."

"...but not everything is happy all the time. And even when that happens to me, you're still there. Whenever we start to talk about stuff that makes one of us uncomfortable, you're always so willing to just...let it go. But...I wanna hear your opinions on things. Maybe we'll disagree, but we're not supposed to agree on everything, and I'd rather even have a fight about it than not know what's going through your head."

He sighed softly, and looked up at the ceiling. "...I guess, I just wanted to let you know that...you can talk to me. About anything. Mundane stuff, things that get you excited, things that are confusing or hurtful or that you don't even know what you feel... I'm here for you too."

Kaito gripped his fist, lying on his broken arm, which was starting to ache at the pressure. He bore it for as long as he could, listening to Kokichi, not wanting him to see him crying for, just, no fucking reason...but the ache grew too urgent, and Kaito, reluctantly, shifted so that he was lying on the side of his cast arm where the break wasn't.

He pushed his forehead into Kokichi's hair, swallowing so that he was certain his voice would be clear as he said, "...sorry...I didn't mean to make it weird."

He fought himself for several seconds, just...wanting to follow through on his plan to deal with all this stuff tomorrow...but the guilt of not being honest with Kokichi, which he had been struggling with since yesterday afternoon, hurt too much when Kaito was struggling to deal with, weirdly enough, both how happy and angry he was right now.

Just...too many heavy emotions at once, clashing against each other.

So, hating himself for being a shitty husband, Kaito murmured into Kokichi's hair, "I'm trying to keep things from you...I'm sorry..."

Kokichi tried not to let his expression fall too much as he saw the redness of Kaito's eyes and just kept rubbing his shoulder. "It's okay. We're both pretty weird, so it's okay to make things weird. It'd be weird not to, really."

He didn't speak after that, just intent on holding Kaito and waiting until he was ready to speak. Whatever was going on in particular, something big or a straw that broke his back, Kokichi wouldn't push until Kaito had sorted it out the best he could.

And, being in that state of compassion was probably what kept Kokichi from exploding. Taking a deep breath, he shifted to start rubbing Kaito's back. "I'm guessing to protect me or not make me upset? I know we talked about that before... Wanting to do those things isn't bad, but, Kai-chan, you can see for yourself how it can backfire. It's easy to wish for things to be sunshine all the time, but it will inevitably rain, and if you didn't pack an umbrella because you tried to pretend rain didn't exist, then you're gonna get soaked. Sometimes you get lucky and find somewhere to hide out the rain, or someone with you knew and packed an umbrella you can share, but...it's really better to have known and prepared in the first place."

"...does that make any sense? ...what a weird metaphor..." he murmured, wrinkling his nose. "But, anyway. I don't blame you for trying to hide things from me, even if I wish you wouldn't. I know my Kai-chan has a good heart, so I can believe in his intentions. But, even if there's horrible things, I want to know. So, like you want to protect me, I can protect you too."

Rubbing down his spine, Kokichi kissed at Kaito's shoulder. "Will you tell me these things now?"

Kokichi was saying such nice things, but god, Kaito felt stupid and ugly right now. One day...he couldn't hold out one more day?! Fuck...just one genuinely good day. Without any of the bullshit...Kaito couldn't have held on and given Kokichi one fucking good day?

Stupid, worthless, piece of shit fucking loser...

Kaito looked miserably at Kokichi, just so fucking tired now...

"My brother sent me a letter," Kaito murmured, not actually listing anything in any particular order. Just saying things now. "He's being told you're abusing me. I was...really embarrassed. Byakuya doesn't have a...a lot of faith in me to begin with, and he says there's a lot of rumors spreading about our relationship and me in general back home...anyway, sorry, that's not the point. He sent me a letter to give to you, and I got it yesterday, but Byakuya doesn't...send people nice letters. And I was afraid it'd upset you so I hid it."

After a pause, he added in, suddenly, "I'm pretty sure someone tried to knock me out with a roof tile yesterday and I didn't wanna point it out because I was afraid it would ruin your trip into town..."

And then, finally, he said, "The reason I had to go talk to King Aiichi is because Byakuya told me to talk to him if the Remnants of Despair ever tried to contact me and most of my letters today were old ex's getting threatened by the group to get a rise out of me or something...I don't really know...but I didn't want to tell you because...today was going w-well, ya know?" Kaito explained, his voice suddenly tight, a new rush of stinging happening in the back of his eyes.

He said all of this quickly, trying to get it all out at once, and when he was done, he took his arm away from Kokichi and put it over his head, hiding under it. Ashamed.

Huh?

How on earth did that get back to Byakuya that way? Kaito had gotten hurt, yes, but too many people were still convinced that he was going to hurt Kokichi. Though...knowing that now, he was worried that when Kaito's initial letter got to Luminary that, it being in Kokichi's handwriting, that would just worry Byakuya more.

But that wasn't everything. Kokichi had been worried about that exact scenario, of malicious rumors going around Luminary about Kaito because of his contact with Kokichi. Some people didn't want to think about things critically, so hurtful stuff like that happened. He'd heard enough rumors about himself around town to know that.

But...that Byakuya apparently didn't have faith in Kaito? He'd thought the letter had just been business focused, that being a part of Byakuya's personality, but if he thought Kaito needed...like, explicit instructions or something? A familiar anger lit in Kokichi's chest, but for someone else this time. Kaito had so much faith in his brother, it was obvious. How dare someone given that spurn it!

Though, he kept the flames down, especially with the next thing bothering Kaito. ...it wasn't just some terrorist group running around Luminary. They had targeted Kaito, threatened his friends and...

God. Kokichi wanted to yell at someone.

But instead, he sat up a bit and kissed the back of Kaito's head, holding him close for several moments.

"I'm so sorry, Kai-chan..." he murmured, his own eyes scrunched shut against the anger and worry building in him. "You shouldn't have had to bear all that alone."

Running a hand through Kaito's hair, Kokichi sat back, allowing Kaito space if he wanted it.

"Your brother is a fucking idiot if he doesn't have faith in you, not to mention a dickhead if he expects you to put faith in him. Belief and trust is a two-way street, and for someone Kai-chan believes in, I'd expect him to have known that from day one." Kokichi huffed, needing to get that out, though he did his best to level out. "I'm sorry about them, but rumors are rumors. They can color perception, sure, but then you just get the chance to prove everyone wrong. Kai-chan can shine brightly enough to pierce through that kind of fog, I know it."

"As for the letter...I would like to read it. I don't care if your brother spends the whole thing just insulting me--it just means he's the thoughtless type that would waste paper and ink, not to mention everyone's time, to do something useless. If he actually has a point to it, then I would like to know. It doesn't matter if it would upset me or not. I'm not really a subscriber to the whole, ignorance is bliss thing, you know?"

"...I know about the tile." Kokichi sighed sadly, leaning over to place a kiss on Kaito's back despite himself. "And it didn't ruin our time. I'm well aware that there are people in town who are angry, and are directing that anger at you. And I know you know it too. But I'm not going to ask you to stay in the castle because of it, and I'm not going to ask them to stop feeling angry. One day they'll see Kai-chan as a person and not the closest representation of their pain, but in the meantime, for the people who aren't angry? It's my own meddling, but I want them to be able to talk with you, and you them. To start building a rapport. For you to not feel like you're stepping onto a different planet whenever you leave the castle. It's a bit selfish of me, but it's what I want. You can make your own decision about that."

Kokichi paused there, feeling...unsure. With the first two things, he already sort of knew about them? Just who Prince Byakuya was, at least. But with the Remnants of Despair? Kaito bringing them up was the first time he'd ever heard of them.

...so, he just...talked. Kokichi put his hands in his lap and stared at them, a furrow in his brow. "...if my dad knows about the Remnants of Despair, then he's been keeping stuff from me too. And if they're threatening your friends, and letting you know that? Then that's...really dangerous. If you told Aiichi, then...then I'm sure he's working on a plan to help your friends, but..."

Kokichi trailed off for a moment, his eyes widening. That was why they were putting off going to the Danganronpan Kingdom, wasn't it. If a group committing murder-suicides had their eye on Kaito, then being somewhere where the only help they'd have would be the people they brought with them would...ah.

He looked over his husband in concern, his heart aching for the fear and worry and uncertainty Kaito had hid in himself just to...what. Let Kokichi sleep?

Sighing again, Kokichi laid himself back down and curled around Kaito, almost spooning him if their positions were a little flattened. "Hey. You, Kaito, my precious husband, is one of the sweetest people in the world. You're considerate, and kind, and brave, and loving, and passionate, and intuitive... I couldn't have asked for anyone better to stand by my side. So that's why I have to be better myself. So, when you're being all those things despite hurting, I can see it and do my damnedest to help. A day where you can smile without worries will count as a good day to me. That's what I mean when I say I love you, Kai-chan."

...Kokichi wasn't angry?

Kaito hid in the dark under his arm, listening to Kokichi talk, just...waiting for the rage. Just...increasingly baffled when it never came. Kaito had hidden things from him. Sure, maybe only for a day, but...you weren't allowed to do that...

Kaito listened to Kokichi talk, just...stunned at the lack of aggression. Kokichi was capable of rage, Kaito knew that. And while he wasn't sure what was going to trigger his husband or not, he had been convinced, convinced, that at least one of these things, Kaito purposefully hiding things from him, would trigger some sort of anger...

But no...Kokichi's words were even and tempered...if anything, he just seemed sad...

Byakuya was not thoughtless!

Kaito swallowed, holding that defensiveness back. Kaito just...kept making his brother look bad to his husband. If he hadn't messed up so much, Byakuya wouldn't think Kaito was in danger, and he wouldn't have felt a need to write a letter to begin with...it was Kaito’s fault if Byakuya looked bad...Kaito was embarrassing him...but the prince held that to himself. Not wanting to stop listening to Kokichi's kind, careful words...taking comfort in them...

Kokichi had known about the roof tile...ah well. Maybe Kaito shouldn't be as surprised about that as he was...he had really tried hard not to let his shock show, to play it off as an honest accident, but Kokichi wasn't stupid… Kaito went rigid, for a second, at the kiss on his back, too many of his fight and flight reflexes firing off right now to handle being touched but...admittedly after the kiss those feelings in him started to soothe a bit...

Kaito took a deep breath, forcing himself to relax as he listened. Kokichi wasn't mad...Kaito hadn't sent him into a meltdown...Kaito pulled his arm up, looking down at Kokichi now as his husband laid next to him, still talking. Kaito relaxing into that soft, lilting tempo...before he felt his eyes burn even harder at the last bit.

"Y-you didn't do anything wrong, 'Kichi," Kaito insisted, glaring into his pillow, ignoring the tears that pushed through his restraint, heavy, thick drops leaking through his heavy, gritted expression. "I was...I was trying to be okay. I thought I was okay. I don't...I don't know why this all hit all at once...it's so hard to be calm th-these days...I don't know what's wrong with me..." Kaito said, entirely honest. Because Kaito Ouma Momota had a lot of pride, and couldn't sit back and look at his life and go, 'oh shit...this sucks huh?'

without his frayed nerves literally beating him over the head with it...

without literally getting nine extremely worrying letters all at once trying to convince him his friends, who may or may not be alive now, all thought he was gross and worthless and then having to take one of those letters to a man he did not trust, all while betraying his husband, which, just, was made worse by a whole childhood’s worth of authority hangups...

Kaito took another deep breath. Genuinely not understanding why he felt so bad.

...but Kokichi's comforts did make him feel better. Even if he couldn't understand why he had spiraled in the first place.

"Love you too, 'Kichi..." Kaito murmured, nerves still too frazzled to reach out and hold him, but...wishing he wasn't. Wanting too. He just looked at his husband, taking so much comfort in Kokichi's calm... "Thank you..."

Kaito just stared at him for a while...before sighing. "Hold on. Let me just give this to you already. It's really probably nothing but just Byakuya over-reacting, but...I'm still sorry I hid it from you."

Kaito went to grab the letter from the nightstand drawer, it still concealed in its envelope addressed to Kokichi, laying next to the abomination. Grabbing it, Kaito closed the drawer again, just lying it next to Kokichi. "It's already late...you don't have to read it if you don't want to. There's not much my brother can do about it," he reassured. Feeling just...better to have finally given it to him.

But, if Kokichi did read it, it would read as this:

Heir-Apparent, Kokichi Ouma,

When talks were first being started of my brother being sold to you, I made it a point to get as many reports about you and your history as I possibly could before allowing myself to take a step back from our fathers’ negotiations and allow this to happen. I must admit, when I was finally satisfied that this would be to Kaito’s benefit, I did so with some optimism. Your kingdom’s inheritance system when it comes to your highest position of authority is truly remarkable, something I rather wish the Luminary system could safely adopt. An established way to pick an heir for the throne without the messy business of banishing, exterminating, or pressuring the current biological heir to concede their right to the throne? Absolutely inspired.

So, my reasoning was, certainly the heir apparent, knowing he could be replaced with a more worthy candidate at any point in his upbringing, must be a truly accomplished person who worked hard to be able to keep the highest honor of inheritance into his adulthood. Especially with such public discourse and outcry at his appointment; a man who could overcome such obstacles truly could be the kind of capable leader that I could entrust Kaito’s future with.

Alas, only a little over two weeks later from your wedding day, as is the time when I am writing this, with several letters on my desk warning me of my brother’s condition, and some disturbing, more accurate reports from my secretaries on your personal physical and mental history received, and I realize now that I was incredibly naïve. Nepotism, even in a society that created such interesting laws to combat such a thing, is a weakness in any ruling party, and your father has apparently fallen prey to it, as so many powerful men before him have.

You are a spoiled, sickly, temperamental, unworthy leader, and your kingdom will undoubtedly suffer under your reign.

Have I made my feelings for you perfectly clear? No misunderstanding? Fantastic. Now to the issue at hand.

It honestly doesn’t matter, in the grand schemes, how ill suited for the task of leading you are. I personally don’t care what becomes of Dicea, nor do I have personal feelings regarding your country one way or another. Honestly, I’m simply relieved that during my reign, I will not have to pour endless funds and resources into pretending like your kingdom actually matters to mine beyond whatever pissing match our fathers seem to be in. My reign will be able to use those additional funds to increase the wealth of my family, and the wealth of my empire, now that it's not being funneled into the black void that is our relations with ‘Dicea’.

That said: don’t think I am unwilling to throw all of those resources away in a heartbeat and rip that treaty apart with my own hands the second I come to power if you lay one more hand on my brother.

In the two weeks he’s been there, I have been informed that he was stabbed twice in the back, has broken his arm, and had a concussion that left him entirely bedridden for, at the point I am writing this, three days now, and according to my informants, will continue to be bedridden for likely another week. That would be unacceptable just on its own, but each report of these incidents create a disturbing picture of your relationship.

The first incident I am meant to believe happened under his own orders, in an attempt to replace a trained, well-respected, life-long assassin with a nine-year-old, all while you just happened to get to be there to watch it occur, and then leave the scene entirely unharmed. I am aware that this version of events came from Kaito himself. I am also, unfortunately, aware that my brother is inclined to the habit of keeping others’ secrets. There’s no official accusation I can make against you for this incident as of now because of his actions, but know that if I ever manage to find additional information that proves you had anything to do with my brother’s stabbing, I will utilize it

The second incident is that he was thrown from a horse traveling away from your castle with his escorts. This is already odd by itself, as none of my informants have any idea where it was they were all meant to be going or why he had started the trip in the middle of the night with a stolen horse that he apparently ran so hard and quickly away from you that it died in the process. My informants are baffled and can supply no reason any of this occurred. However, with lack of concrete information on the incident, isn’t it telling that the common rumor is that he was attempting to leave you in secret? An action that I am certain my brother would absolutely not attempt without dire reason.

The limits of formal correspondent writing is extremely telling at this moment. I really cannot express accurately to you my actual fury.

Rumors aside, all they know for certain is that at some point his escorts left, then he left, and then all three came back, escorted by one of your guards, who looked as if she was recently in a fight. My brother, in the words of one of my informants, looked ‘beaten all to hell’, and that one of his non-combatant escorts was also sporting a serious shoulder wound.

Let me make something clear: you don’t actually own my brother.

You paid us a handsome dowry, certainly, but it was funds that we matched in turn. And yes, you signed an extremely generous treaty, but these terms were beneficial to both parties and its content does not equal a responsibility on my end to turn a blind eye to this situation. Finally, yes, my father may have agreed to send my brother for marriage upon request, which is currently his right to do so, but my father will not always be the one in charge you fucking brat. NONE of these circumstances equal you getting free rein to make some new toy out of him. If this treatment continues, I can and will call for King Aiichi to return him home immediately, and I could personally give less than two shits how it affects the treaty.

I have yet to receive correspondence from my brother, but I have been informed that he is sharing a room with you. He is under no obligation to sleep in your bed while you treat him this way, and I have decided that he will not. I have already written a letter to King Aiichi about these same concerns, which will likely arrive to him at the same time this gets to you, and I have demanded of him that he provide my brother his own room and space away from you. I will consider Kaito not receiving these commendations by the time my next report arrives to be an official statement from the king that he supports and enables this misuse of my brother, and my next letter will be to demand his return.

Further escalation will depend on your actions.

I will not discuss this with you this politely again.

Heir Apparent

Byakuya Momota

"That's okay," Kokichi hummed, wishing he could do more, but there was obviously a battle in Kaito's mind that he had to fight himself. "It's okay to not be okay, and it's okay to not know why you're not okay. Life is complicated, and a lot of time it doesn't make sense. You're allowed to hurt, and even if you find out why...you still might just hurt. It doesn't mean you're weak or useless or unsuited or...whatever. It means you're human."

Even after Kaito had given him the letter (next to the damn vibrator, wow), Kokichi just spent a few moments continuing to run his fingers through Kaito's hair, looking over his husband with sympathy and affection. Then, he kissed his husband's forehead, and opened the letter.

...

What a fucking moron. A self-important, snobby moron that loved his brother--though, the phrasing of being sold, ugh...those were thoughts for another time--but still. And whoever his informants were were really awful at their jobs, sheesh.

Kokichi sighed a bit and set the letter aside to respond to once he could be sure his hands wouldn't suffer for it. He kind of just wanted to send a letter that said nothing but, "gargle my nuts", but, for Kaito's sake, he could try to be more cordial. So far, he really couldn't see anything of the picture Kaito had painted of his brother but...well. Siblings, man. How do they work.

He then snuggled down beside Kaito again and gave him a smile. "He's not as creative as I thought he'd be when angry. You set my expectations too high, Kai-chan. I'll write back to him later. I kinda wish we all could just talk face to face, but I guess that's the thing that makes international understanding so hard, huh."

Kaito had carefully watched Kokichi's face while he read it, again, just...tensing. Waiting for the fallout...

And felt his chest deflate with relief when Kokichi just sighed. Grinning shakily, Kaito looked up at Kokichi with a mixture of relief, guilt and adoration as he said, "Y-yeah? So he didn't say anything too bad? Good...fuck, I'm sorry. I really psyched myself out. I love him, but Byakuya's...intimidating. I get kind of nervous when he does things," Kaito admitted, reaching out to Kokichi, feeling calm enough to touch him now, drawing him close as he closed his eyes with a sigh. "I'm sorry about all that. Thanks for not..." Kaito shrugged. Not sure he could articulate how he had expected Kokichi to react in any meaningful way.

He was just relieved it hadn't happened.

"Nah, he said some pretty ignorant, heinous shit, but, like... He doesn't know me? Or anything that's been going on? So none of the insults towards me really mean anything. He's pretty protective over you, and it's nice to know that, if you were in any real danger, he'd, yanno, at least send angry letters to protect you. Or threaten to start a war again, but that's less nice and just more...exasperating." It wasn't going to be comforting to hear any of that, but Kokichi wasn't going to lie to Kaito about this. Not when there was already so much misunderstanding and misinformation around.

There was...a lot about Byakuya that worried Kokichi. How Kaito seemed afraid of him, despite the obvious care the two felt for each other. How he referred to Luminary as an empire, and planned on increasing the Momotas wealth when... How he would put people's lives on the line for one person. The lack of faith he showed in Kaito...

When it pertained to Kokichi too? That was where he could criticize and do things. But otherwise, it was between the brothers, and there was nothing he could do there aside from supporting his husband.

"You can read the letter if you want, though maybe not when you're already feeling shitty. It's a bummer." Kokichi smiled softly, carefully, and ran his hand down Kaito's arm. "You don't have to apologize for having emotions, but I'll accept the apology for hiding things from me. Just try not to do it in the future? And I've done nothing that warrants thanks, but, Kai-chan's welcome. I love you."

Kaito rested his head on the pillow, looking over at Kokichi, just...feeling immensely more calm now than he had for most of the last two days. Though his expression still got notably more tired as Kokichi relayed some of what was in the letter. Looking at it with an almost morbid curiosity, Kaito reached out and picked it up, wondering exactly what Byakuya had said that would make Kokichi think he was ready to restart the war...

...but he only made it through the first line before his face tightened, a brief look of hurt flashing across his expression, before immediately closing the letter back up again, giving it back to Kokichi. "Yeah...maybe later is good."

Or maybe never? Never could be good too.

Kaito reached out to take Kokichi's hand, pulling it up to his lips and kissing the pinky, just feeling...tired now. "I asked Shuuichi to find Byakuya's informants. I don't want to do anything bad to them. They're not, like, spies or anything...more likely than not they’re just so low-level staff members being paid for, like, rumors and general observations and stuff, ya know? Not, like, sussing out secrets or anything, just anything anyone in the castle would happen to know." Kaito shrugged, not sure why he felt like he needed to explain it to Kokichi when his husband probably already knew that. Probably just because this felt like an old conversation he had already had with someone else. He hadn't known the difference between a spy and an informant when Togami had explained it to him, but he had been fifteen then, and hadn't known much about anything.

"But, yeah...I just want to talk to them. Clear up the situation so that they can verify to Byakuya that everything really is fine."

It definitely wasn't a pleasant thing to read. For Kokichi in particular, but...there were a lot of hurtful things directed at Kaito too, whether it was intentional on Byakuya's part or not. He wasn't sure which was better at this point, but...that was something the brothers needed to sort out for themselves. If either would even be willing.

Kokichi sent Kaito a soft look as he kissed his hand and gave him a nod. "It would be better if we could give them more than rumors to send back to your brother. Really...once your letter--or letters? If you wrote another?--reaches him, I'd hope that Byakuya would put more weight into your own words than some stranger relaying rumors." But...that hope wasn't very strong.

Snuggling down against Kaito, Kokichi reached over with his non-kissed hand and brushed away some of the hair covering Kaito's forehead, gently stroking his thumb across it. "Shuu-chan will find them in a flash, I bet. Then we can talk everything out and it'll be okay."

It would be. Even if not immediately, but Kokichi would try his damnedest to make things okay. And he could rely on...er, well, everyone in the Dicean castle, at least, to try their hardest for it too. That was why they were there.

Kaito frowned at the comment of Byakuya, like...'trusting his word', hearing the judgment in Kokichi's tone. It...it was more complicated than that, but Kaito didn't know how to express that to his husband in a way that didn't paint Byakuya in a worse light than the impression Kokichi already had. How could his brother trust the word of someone that his mentor had proven, over and over again growing up, could so easily be tricked and pressured and confused and...

Kaito could, and would, spend the rest of his life proving that he wasn't entirely worthless. That he wasn't anyone's dog. That he was capable of great things! That even a guy like him could make the impossible possible!! That all you had to do was believe and make it so!!!

But...it didn't matter how well Kaito did. Byakuya would always know the worst sides of him.

There was just no getting around that.

...yeah. There was no good way to explain that to Kokichi, let alone anyone else. It was just something the brothers had to deal with. And it wasn't all bad, that sort of relationship. Having someone around who knew exactly how weak or stupid you could be, and their reaction, eventually, being that they would protect you? Kaito was lucky to have Byakuya. He was.

...but it was nice to have someone like Kokichi too. Someone who talked like it was baffling, the idea that Kaito's word alone couldn't be trusted, even right after being told that Kaito had been trying to hide things from him.

That...that was nice.

Feeling warm, soothed, by Kokichi's small touches and careful words, Kaito held him tight.

He held on, and time passed.

-

Maki had spent, after the morning’s training, all day in her room, working on blueprints, timelines, and plans. Putting together her presentation for Kokichi.

He wasn't a fan of blood, violence, or killing, so Maki was now working tirelessly to figure out how to phrase her skill sets and the opportunities she could provide him in a way that didn't...directly reference any of that. It wouldn't fool him into thinking that wasn't what she intended, of course, and she didn't do so with this thought in mind. But hopefully keeping her plans and suggestions as 'clean' as possible would at least not turn Kokichi off to her words so hard or immediately that he wouldn't even hear her out.

This was...this was her chance.

This was her opportunity.

She...she could save all of them.

Maki took a deep breath, putting pen to blue paper again, pointing arrows to the blindspots, when she heard a knock on the door.

"Maki?" Kaito said from the otherside. "Me and Kokichi are heading down to dinner. Do you wanna come?"

Maki looked over her work, pouting...she kept feeling like she was almost done, even though there was still so much more to do... She was getting impatient, honestly. Wanted to just drag Kokichi inside and go 'Here! Look at this! Fucking send me out already!'

...but she wasn't the type to hurry at the risk of the mission, so she put the papers aside and headed out. Opening the door, she saw both of her princes, both of them looking a little worn down, but otherwise fine. Kokichi, at least, didn't seem to be favoring one of his legs over the other, as he had been this morning. "Certainly. Is Shuuichi coming down?"

Kokichi had put his sweater back on, feeling much better than he had that morning, but not enough to get dressed. Most people were pretty used to see him lounging around in his pajamas at times, but, still. A sweater was easy.

He waved a bit to Maki before shrugging with a bit of a sigh. "We knocked, but if he was in, he didn't answer. It's my guess he's off working somewhere else in the castle, but, like, he should probably show up to dinner on his own? I mean...if he's figuring out who's talkin' to Byakuya, that's kinda dependent on people, and they're gonna be at dinner, so..."

Or maybe he was in the library again. Finding out the informants was a little time-sensitive, but, like, Shuuichi could still chill out or whatever.

They headed down the hall together, and Kokichi didn't find the stairs very daunting, at least compared to earlier. Not when his knees felt loose and flexible and, yanno, not in pain from every step.

Kaito kept an eye on Kokichi down the first staircase, but seeing that his husband's footing was sure, allowed himself to relax, turning to grin at Maki, whose face was already darkening as she asked, "What do you mean?"

"Nothing important, nothing important," Kaito reassured, giving his best friend a wink, which only made her more suspicious, some murder bleeding into her eyes as he continued quickly. "Byakuya's been hearing some ugly rumors about me and Kokichi. You know how he gets, he's very...reactive," Kaito said, waving his hands vaguely, talking even faster as he started to feel the violence radiate off her. "So, so, all that to say, we're going to talk to the people who have been sending my bro the rumors, and get this all cleared up, no problem, and Maki you are getting looks from the staff."

Maki, her hair floating slightly from the heat of her frustration, glanced her intense, red eyes at someone carrying bedding upstairs, the person just giving her a slightly worried, mostly baffled look, but giving her a wider circle around the staircase than was necessarily needed. Maki tsk'd to herself, before taking a deep breath, holding it...and her violent radiation eased.

"Do you need me to have the conversation with them?" Maki asked, her intentions plain on her face.

"Nope!" Kaito said plainly, putting a friendly hand on her shoulder as he gently shook her, the motion causing her to look at him slightly annoyed...but she seemed more at ease in the face of his casualness. "Again, not a big deal. Just gotta clear it up."

Maki huffed, closing her eyes in annoyance and still walking effortlessly down the steps as she mused. "Shocking. The great Heir Apparent Momota, making some big, over the top judgment based on almost no evidence other than a few facts he's latched onto? I can't believe we're still dealing with this shit the next country over."

"Maki!" Kaito said, shocked, looking around suddenly, as if he expected someone to be listening in, saying in a hushed tone, "Come on, you can't-"

"I don't serve him anymore. I can say what I like about him, and it doesn't matter who hears," Maki said, her tone on the matter final. "And he's insufferable. One of the great joys of coming here was thinking I'd never have to put up with him again. Clearly I was naive."

Kaito awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck as the three of them got to just outside the dining hall, saying quietly, "Come on...he's not that bad."

Kokichi snickered a bit at Maki's reaction, but chimed in to shake his head. "It's all good, Maki-chan. It's not really surprising that people whose jobs aren't relaying accurate information aren't that good at it. It's helpful to get outsider perspectives on things, but not when they just don't know what's going on."

He could understand that from Byakuya's perspective, at least. While Kokichi would be fine writing periodic letters to the heir updating him about more casual goings-on in the castle, if something actually bad was going on, there would be no reason to trust one of the people in charge. Getting someone with fewer stakes to relay the information would paint a clearer picture--if they knew what they were doing.

He still should take Kaito's own opinions more seriously, though.

He looked over at Maki curiously as she put in her opinions, finding them...more in-line with his impression of Byakuya than Kaito's had been. But, by his own logic, he still had to believe that, at least to Kaito, Byakuya was a better person than he'd displayed so far. ...even if all Kaito could say was that he "wasn't that bad" instead of being able to supply examples that would show him in a better light.

Kokichi rubbed Kaito's back a little, smiling sheepishly up at him. "Well, your brother cares about you. I would hope that he wouldn't be insufferable to his loved ones."

And with that, they went into the dining room, dishes still being brought out, though it looked like the main meal was a chicken stir fry, the meat and vegetables glistening with sauces as they sat steaming in large bowls across the table. Greeting a few people, Kokichi passed curved plates over to Kaito and Maki before starting to scoop rice onto his own, glancing around to try and see if Shuuichi had beaten them to dinner.

Maki scowled at Kokichi's last line, but recognizing that Kaito was uncomfortable with this line of thought, kept her opinion to herself. As much fun as it was to finally be able to openly bad-mouth the Momota family without, like, technically committing low-key treason, she wouldn't do it at the expense of the one good thing to actually come out of that shit-show.

It really was a shame Kaito hadn't been renamed into an Ouma. It would have been nice to get the last of their filth off him. Sure, 'Kaito Ouma, Dicean Prince-Consort of the Stars' maybe didn't have the same 'oomph', but still...it'd be have been fun to finally be able to spit out the name 'Momota' like the slur it was without Kaito getting lumped into the curse.

Maki had strong feelings about the Momota family.

Kaito, entirely unaware of how dark his friend’s thoughts had gotten, sat next to her, sitting in between her and Kokichi, and immediately started to fill his plate, realizing all of the sudden that, shit, he was hungry! Training this morning had left him with an appetite, and he filled the plate high before getting started.

"No sign of Shuuichi yet, huh?" Kaito observed, looking around the dining room. If the detective had been in here, he would have moved to sit with them if he realized they hadn't spotted him among the crowd, and since Kaito couldn't see him... "Well, maybe he's just running late. Hopefully he gets here soon, there's some stuff we all need to talk about. Oh! There's Tim! Timothy, over here!"

The young boy walked in, looking around for Kaito's voice before moving around the odd Dicean, going to sit next to Maki. He also, immediately, started filling his own plate high with food, though he couldn't resist taking a few bites as he grabbed things, saying in between gulps, "Evening, Miss Harukawa. Hi, Prince Kokichi! Prince Kaito," Timothy‘s tone notably more hostile. Clearly still frustrated by their conversation that morning.

"Hi, Timothy!" Kokichi smiled kindly at the young boy that joined them, some of his worries rearing their heads in response to the...less than enthusiastic way he greeted Kaito. But...the trip to the coast would be a good thing for Timothy, right? It meant getting away from the castle and only having to deal with the people that he knew, however loosely.

Eating a few bites, Kokichi considered it for a bit before speaking up. "Maki-chan, Tim, we should wait for Shuu-chan, but bein' late's his own fault so we can catch him up later."

"Kai-chan an' I were talkin', and, with everything that's been going on and is coming up, we were thinking about taking a vacation to the coast soon? It'd be about a week-long trip, so not exactly a grand adventure, no matter what it seems like to me," he laughed lightly, able to joke about his circumstances in this way, "But, what do you think? It's not like we'd leave tomorrow or anything, but it'd be nice to enjoy a beach trip while the weather's still gonna be nice."

Kokichi was aware he caught a few glances from various staff members, some looking a little shocked, others grinning with friends and doing a few fist pumps. But...being able to talk about plans like this in public, without it having to be a secret...hoo boy that was a fuckin’ load off.

"You're going to the coast?" Tim asked, his brow furrowed, looking worried.

"You're not getting rid of us that easy," Kaito snorted, grabbing some wine and, after a small, testing taste, sipping it, "You're coming too. It'll be fun. We'll get to meet some people, see some sights, maybe actually convince Shuuichi to get out from under his hat long enough to get some color on his face. And like 'Kichi said, we're not leaving immediately, but we're gonna try to get there and back again before school for Timothy starts."

"School?" Maki said, looking at Kaito with an eyebrow raised.

"Yeah, sorry, I've been meaning to talk to you about that, Maki. Me and Kokichi have been talking, and Kokichi brought up the idea that Tim might do well to go to school. It was just an idea, but...I've been giving it a lot of thought, and I think it's the right call. I told Tim this morning that I want him to go. What do you think?"

"I think you should have talked to me about it before telling Timothy anything," Maki said, her voice tense, stabbing into her food as Timothy snickered next to her. She turned her glaring eyes on him as he did though, which sent him back to looking at his food hurriedly as she said, "I'm in charge of his training, and so long as we're following through on that, I might as well claim mentorship over him by this point. So if you want to change his schedule, that's something you need to talk to me about, Kaito."

Kaito nodded, looking a little shame-faced. "Sorry, sorry. So...you don't want him to-"

"Don't put words in my mouth," Maki interrupted, "Of course he should go. It's a good idea, Kokichi. And a trip to the ocean sounds less stressful than trying to plan a trip cross-country. Or are we still trying to do both within the next few months?"

Kokichi winced a little bit, wanting to ease into the whole...school discussion a little more gently. But oh well. "The next term starts in about a month, so there's time to like...scope things out and discuss it. And most schools do their best to accommodate for, like, schedules and specialties and stuff like that. I'll get you conduct codes and stuff like that to look through if you want." Hopefully for both Maki and Tim to look through.

He could practically feel Aiichi giving him a glance at Maki's follow-up question, but Kokichi felt no embarrassment in shaking his head. "Nah, things are a little too hectic to try and plan a big trip like going to DRK right now. Once we're not still bein' tossed by the waves of a fifteen-year war and the sprouts of extremist groups, then I think sightseeing will be in better taste."

It was a lot to hope for, but...it was just dumb to go on vacation when there were serious issues to address. Taking a week off to go someplace they'd be safe for sure? Totally fine. He'd had to take weeks off before due to illness and his work hadn't become a monster. Taking over a season off? What would the castle do without him to compile agriculture data?

Kokichi laughed a little at his thoughts, feeling...in better spirits about everything than he usually did, despite all the awful things going on. Weird.

"Extremist groups?" Tim said, trying to inhale, unsuccessfully, an entire ball of honey-bread into his mouth and talk at the same time. As he tried to say something else, his face went a little blue, and it was Kaito who reached around Maki's shoulder and gave him a firm WACK! on his back. The kid coughed a bit, finished swallowing it down, and immediately reached for another as he said, "What, those dumb riots happening again? They ain’t nothing. They always start running once they hear the drums. Buncha cowards."

"Those aren't extremist groups, those are protesters," Maki corrected him quietly, reaching out to pinch the bridge of his ear hard. "Chew your food or die."

Other than wincing at the pinch, Timothy just shrugged, taking somewhat smaller bites.

"No, no, not the protesters," Kaito said, also lowering his voice now, feeling weird talking about that with a table full of Diceans. "'Kichi's talking about some group called the Remnants of Despair. You ever heard of them Maki?"

Maki looked over at Kokichi curiously. "No, can't say I have. Maybe Shu-"

Tim glanced over at the door. "Mr. Saihara! Over here!"

Shuuichi looked around, spotted his friends...and gave them a bright, eager smile. His cheeks tinted red as he went to go sit with them.

Kokichi sighed quietly, focusing on his food for a moment. There had been protests in Dicea too, but less...bombastic as the ones he'd heard were going on in Luminary. Despite how dumb the war was to start off, as it went on, most people seemed to realize that just...stopping Dicean involvement meant that Luminary would invade. And, considering that everyone fighting in the war on the Dicean side had volunteered, there was a good chance that they'd just keep fighting even if Aiichi sent out an official statement saying that they surrendered. The most common reason people joined the war was to protect the home they loved from the invaders.

He hadn't heard too much about what the Luminary protesters' demands were, but...he supposed it would make you way angrier to be a part of a war you had no choice in and wouldn't destroy your country if you left it.

He was still eating, but Kokichi had been pushing his food around on his plate with a furrowed brow before he was broken out of his thoughts by the last member of their little group arriving.

Shuuichi's smile was...a little weird, but smiles were good things! And maybe Shuuichi was just feeling more comfortable to feel happy like that. Kokichi grinned back at the detective, giving him a wave and picking up a plate for him since he was sitting closest to the stack.

"Hey, Shuu-chan! Thanks for the muffins earlier! They were suuuuuuper yummy."

Shuuichi sat down at an empty chair across from the rest of the group, reaching over to take Kokichi's offered plate with a cheerful, "Thank you!" followed quickly with a warm smile at the small prince. "I'm glad you liked them, Kokichi. I'll be sure to grab some more next time I'm down by the pharmacy. Did you have any, Kaito?" he asked, putting food onto his plate.

Kaito and Maki just...looked at him for a moment, before glancing at each other. Equally confused.

"Uh...no, thanks though. I'm trying to stick to proteins and vegetables until I feel solid during training," Kaito admitted, giving his friend a curious smile. "You seem to be in a good mood, Shuuichi. Did something happen today?"

The yellow-eyed detective looked up at the question, surprised. For once, his cap wasn't sitting on him at an angle, so that it could hang low and Shuuichi would still be able to see peoples faces a little without showing much of his own. Instead it was just placed normally against his hairline, Shuuichi's face almost entirely clear to see. He just looked...chirpy. Was maybe the word for it.

God damn he felt good though. Better than he had ever felt his whole life.

"Not really," Shuuichi said with a pleased little shrug. "Sorry I'm late. I spent some time out in town and when I got back remembered to get that favor done you asked for, Kaito, so I went ahead and did that real quick. Wasn't much use of my talents, honestly. Just went to the mailroom, got a look at their receipts book; who's suddenly sending regular correspondence to the Luminary castle that has no obvious reason to? These two people," Shuuichi said, taking out a slip of paper and tossing it to Kaito, who grabbed it out of the air. "You are welcome."

Kaito looked at the paper, not recognizing either name...before he passed it over to his husband. "'Kichi?"

...so it was out of the ordinary. But...Kokichi couldn't think of anything alarming that would just...make Shuuichi peppy and pleased. Kaito had said he looked kind of sick earlier, and, yeah, Shuuichi's cheeks were kind of red, but not in a dangerous way, it didn't look like. ...maybe he was just buzzed?

He looked over Shuuichi curiously but didn't say anything. Even if it would be kind of funny if the kitchen thought every Luminary there was a lush.

Taking the paper of their informants, Kokichi read the names...and sighed loudly. "Well, that's not a surprise that your brother's been getting nothing but rumors."

Takashi Souzen and Tomomi Eiten. They were good people...but...

Kokichi passed the paper back, shaking his head as he started to explain to the rest of the group. "Kashi-chan is a scribe here; he mostly deals with public needs 'n stuff. Like helping with advertising and city or country-wide announcements. So he hears gossip from all over the place--and doesn't really process it before he passes it along. He's prolly been sending a stream of every little rumor he hears."

"And Tomo-chan..." Kokichi looked around the room before pointing towards a pretty young woman with a headband decorated with a moon and stars basking in the evening sunlight, positioned in such a way it almost looked as though she was posing for a portrait. "She's an event coordinator. Makes sure that we don't, like, book the same room for two things at once and tries to schedule things in a way that people won't usually have to choose between two things they wanna do. She's sweet but..."

He sighed with a shrug. "Kind of an airhead."

"Neither of them are any good at objectivity...or for having any desire to dig into what the truth is. We can talk with 'em after dinner, if ya want."

"I bet Maki could take both of them aside," Shuuichi gently recommended, barely touching his food as he leaned his head into his hand, watching Maki with fond amusement as his friend’s eyes narrowed slightly, her fork spinning lightly in her hand as she now openly observed the woman with a heated expression. Timothy glanced up at Maki curiously, following her line of sight and, in solidarity, doing his best to glare at her as well. "If it's that important, I mean," Shuuichi said with a small snicker.

Kaito gave Shuuichi a small, worried look, before placing a cooling hand on Maki's shoulder. "No. Kokichi just said she was sweet. She probably didn't mean any harm. Me and him will talk to her and the scribe after dinner. Thanks again, Shuuichi, but neither of you need to be involved in this anymore."

Shuuichi nodded lazily, feeling himself close his eyes for just a...tad too long. He wasn't sleepy, but man, he just wanted to lie somewhere and just...feel things. Mmmm. Feel lots of things. That'd be nice...maybe put some hands on himself. Maybe get someone at this table to put some hands on him...ha!

Mmmmmm...he had probably over done it, huh? Itch had recommended he stop after one, but, well...

Oh! Itch!

"I met your friend today!" Shuuichi said brightly, looking over at Kaito and Kokichi. "Itch, Tom, and Aba? They invited me to have some drinks with them. They really wanna hang out with you guys again."

...that was...

Okay. Obviously, Kokichi didn't know, well, any of the Luminaries that well. He'd learned a heck of a lot, but no matter how many deep conversations you had, there was no way to know a person in only about a month.

But...Shuuichi had never really been...comfortable with Maki's job, in Kokichi's experience. Just accepting of it. Had, in fact, assured that Maki wouldn't be involved with Diceans in the past. And now bringing it up on his own?

...but if Kaito and Maki, who actually did know Shuuichi well, weren't saying anything...

"No fuckin' way," he sighed. "No offense, Maki-chan, but Kashi-chan and Tomo-chan are more just...oblivious than malicious. At any time. Whoever asked them to relay things to Byakuya probably just didn't explain what they were supposed to write well. Easy fix."

The tension born from worry and unease was masked pretty well by Kokichi's excitement at the next, far less concerning thing Shuuichi said. "Oh! That's awesome!"

Aaaaand that probably meant Shuuichi was just a little drunk right now. Kokichi sent the detective a teasing smirk, kind of relieved to have come up with an answer. "Did Itch-chan have you try some of his brew? Did it actually taste good? Aba-chan said it was pretty strong, and, looking at Shuu-chan now, I can see that."

Shuuichi sighed, saying with almost a hint of reverence, "It's perfect."

...okay, it also tasted like hot garbage, and he had barely gotten the first bottle down without vomiting. But that hadn't been the point. The point had been...opening his eyes. Which Shuuichi hadn't realized had been closed for so long...and the thought made him despair, a little. To think, all the years he had wasted, just...caring about shit. Just worrying and hemming and hawing, just, all the time! Feeling guilty about sussing out rebel sympathizers in the court, who were usually just servants who had dared to say something to the wrong person. Agonizing over discovering culprits in robberies and petty theft of the castle, because they were usually hungry, desperate people who wouldn't even survive until their trials. Just, hating himself as his observations hurt otherwise good people, over and over and over...

Like any of it had ever actually mattered!

It was so funny!

God he wanted to fuck someone.

Oh, sure, Shuuichi had been...extremely worried when he took his first sip. Had recognized the taste immediately, of course he had, and, being his usual nervous, simpering, pathetic self, had tried to leave the group, trying not to let them know that he knew what was in the drink...trying to get back to the castle to...what? Do what he always did? Go tattling to the nearest authority figure??

So fucking dumb.

Thank god they had managed to catch him. He felt...soooo much better. Happier. Stronger. Confident.

Shuuichi snickered again. "You all should definitely try it."

"Itch, Tom, and Aba?" Maki said, glancing over at Kaito, who was still staring at Shuuichi, his expression just...confused. "Are these the three that cut up your hand?"

Kaito glanced away from Shuuichi for a moment to look at Maki, before, truthfully, shaking his head. "No, no, none of them cut me, it's fine Maki. They're good guys. It'd be nice to sit down with them again soon, actually. Uh, Shuuichi?" Kaito said, giving his friend a gentle smile. "You seem a little out of it, dude. Maybe we should grab you some water and I should take you to bed."

Shuuichi blushed bright red at this, snickering to himself, which just...made Kaito more concerned. The truth was, Kaito could remember seeing his friend drunk literally only a handful of times, and he usually just got real sleepy and real quiet. He had...never seen him look like this before.

Kaito, who knew that when his friend woke up in the morning would be back to his sweet, shy self, also knew that if he just let Shuuichi sit here and potentially do something to embarrass himself around the Diceans, his friend would agonize over it.

Shuuichi just covered his face with his hand, just...leering at Kaito. "Yeah? I mean, if you're offering..."

Okay. Time to be a bro.

Kaito stood up, leaning over to kiss Kokichi on the head. "I'm gonna help him upstairs and be right back down, babe."

Kokichi squinted at Shuuichi in confusion. Well...he had said he didn't mind weird tastes...though that reaction had been more indifference than anything. Maybe Shuuichi really was the type to enjoy things that made other people reflexively wrinkle their noses.

"...maybe," Kokichi slowly said. "I might try a sip at some point, but I'm not much of a drinker, like, at all."

He was honestly a little relieved when Kaito offered to take Shuuichi to bed, the detective kind of...freaking him out. Just a little. And was getting a lot of amused and concerned looks from the others at the table alike. It was more common for people to leave dinner sloshed, not to come to it like that.

Accepting the kiss with a happy smile, Kokichi waved Kaito and Shuuichi off. "M'kay. See you tomorrow, Shuu-chan!"

He waited a few beats after they'd left before turning to Maki with a raised eyebrow. "He usually that weird of a drunk?"

Maki shook her head, watching as Kaito led Shuuichi out, who hung on his arm in a way that Maki had never seen her friend compose himself before. "Usually, by the time you realize Shuuichi is drunk, it's because he's fallen asleep," Maki said. "Mind, he doesn't drink a lot to begin with, and even then usually only some kind of wine. Maybe beer affected him differently."

Maki considered the situation curiously...before shaking her head, smiling a little. "Well, it's interesting to know that there's a type of drink out there that makes Shuuichi laughing and excitable. That could be a fun way to spend a night on the beach. Just...not at a dinner table."

"Am I going to get to have some?" Tim asked.

"Do you wanna die?" Maki replied.

-

"Alright, come on, buddy, we're almost there," Kaito promised, Shuuichi just entirely wrapped around his arm, burying his face into his shoulder as he let Kaito lead entirely, giggling to himself every now and again. "Man, dude, this is a whole new side of you. How much did you drink?"

Shuuichi shook his head into Kaito's shirt. "Doesn't matter. It's what was in it that matters," Shuuichi insisted, sighing as they got to his room, releasing Kaito's arm so that he could unlock it. "I just feel really good, Kaito. All...opened up, you know?"

Kaito gave his friend a worried look, but there was some amusement there too now. Like Kokichi, he had been worried at the sudden change in the detective...but like Maki and Kokichi, knowing he had been drinking had eased those concerns considerably. Again, while he had never seen the detective like this before, like with most things when it came to drinking, Kaito was willing to give almost all of it a pass under the guise of 'well...he's drunk.'

This mind frame was exactly why Itch had chosen alcohol, though there were a thousand different ways to spread the poison en-masse. Eating it a bit at a time worked, but took too long. Smoking it was quickest, and felt great, but people would be quick to call it a drug. But booze? Everyone fucking acted unlike themselves drinking, and no one ever cared. No one was going to notice for such a long time...

Shuuichi really did think it was a damn good idea.

And it was going to help so many people!

"Well, I'm glad you're all opened up, man, but it's time you button down for some rest. Here, let me grab you some water, you'll thank me in the morning," Kaito said, gently leading Shuuichi to the bed and letting him sit.

"I'll thank you now. Thank you, Kaito. You've always been such a good friend to me..." Shuuichi said, watching the prince head into the bathroom with a glass from his desk with open adoration. "I really never thanked you enough. You always tried to push me into such fun and interesting things growing up...and I never just let it happen. I don't know why you bothered sticking with me."

Kaito snorted, shaking his head. Shuuichi was totally out of it. Geez. Filling the glass, he brought it back to his friend, giving him a wink as Shuuichi took it with a grateful smile. "What are you talking about? You're awesome, dude! I don't just make anyone my sidekick, you earned that shit! I'd have made you my squire, if I could have. Maybe someday I still will! Who knows what tomorrow will bring!"

Shuuichi rolled his eyes at this, as he said for the thousandth time, "Don't wanna be a squire, Kaito. That's not the sort of fun or interesting thing I'm talking about..." He drank down the whole glass of water, not stopping until the thing was empty, admittedly feeling a little better to feel that coolness in him as he leered up at Kaito. "...I'm talking, like...like..."

...and here Shuuichi faltered. As Kaito just stared down at him in curious amusement, the detective suddenly found himself wanting to dip his hat back over his face, to hide from this whole conversation.

Whatever change was happening within him, it was happening slowly, and hadn't taken full effect. Not enough to do what Shuuichi was daydreaming about, which was to grab Kaito, pull him onto the bed, put all his weight into pinning his broken arm down and-

Shuuichi closed his eyes, suddenly shuddering.

...he needed to sleep. He was so confused. He needed to sober up so that he could understand what he was even thinking.

Was feeling like this...this ache in him, this, just, total lack of self control, of sympathy...

Would he wake up like this?

"Like?" Kaito prompted, still just trying to let his friend finish his thought. No part of him defensive. Entirely trusting.

Shuuichi sighed. "Like trying to hook me up with that girl at that party when we were kids. Things I should have just left myself more open to...thanks for taking me to my room, Kaito. I'm okay now."

Kaito laughed, blushing at the memory. "Yeah, that was...you don't have to regret stuff like that, dude, it's just not your thing. We all know that now. Anyway, everyone will be just down the hall soon if you need anything. Get some sleep, man."

And with that Kaito was gone.

Staring miserably at the closed door, already wishing he had just...pounced, Shuuichi grabbed his journal, and started writing his symptoms.

-

Kaito got back downstairs quickly, taking his seat again. "He is wasted, you guys," he chuckled.

Did people really act that differently depending on what they drank? Seemed so. While his concern wouldn't just entirely disappear, Kokichi decided to put it out of his mind for now. So he just shrugged a bit and tittered at Tim's curiosity, and continued eating dinner.

"Geez," Kokichi sighed with a soft laugh. "I guess I should prepare for that kinda stuff if we go hang with Aba-chan and the rest, huh? Considering every time one of us has met up with them they've been drinking." That probably wasn't that unusual for people around their ages though--it wasn't in novels, and it seemed like that was one thing the books didn't exaggerate.

Moving some of his rice around idly, Kokichi mused aloud. "Hope he doesn't have too bad of a hangover tomorrow--I dunno what sort of study he's doin' with Dr. Kimura, but if he's trying to make it a regular thing in the morning, that's gonna be brutal."

He noticed the sharp looks. But Kokichi didn't care. The doctor was golden in his books, and he could talk about her if he damn well wanted to! ...even if he was too nervous to speak to her.

"To be fair, it's only been the two times now," Kaito pointed out. Before his eyes widened and he snapped his finger. "Kimura! PTSD lady! That's who that name was! God, it's been on the tip of my brain since yesterday!" Kaito said, shaking his head. That was what it was he had been trying to recall about her at the pharmacy. She was the same person who had made the one not totally shitty report about Kokichi.

Huh...what a coincidence that the person Shuuichi was getting medical advice from was also the same person who had been the one to take Kokichi's side in her report. Saying that he didn't need the restrictions and...hmmm...

In Kaito's mind, half the point of the upcoming trip was to prove a point about Kokichi to all these fuckers at the castle, so...and it was literally only a week now...not exactly a huge commitment...

Kaito looked over at Kokichi, a wide grin on his face. "Hey, you said you liked her, right? Why don't we ask that lady to be the trip healer?"

Again, Kokichi couldn't quite hide a wince, Kaito's exclamation getting a few more eyes glancing their way. He...he wasn't crazy. He wasn't. He was just someone with different needs from others, and what he needed help with didn't detract from his accomplishments. Okay.

"E-eh?" Though, right behind the...not shame. Was surprise and a little floundering on Kokichi's part. "I-I mean, I haven't seen her since I was, like, eight? That's a little weird to come out of the blue and ask. A-and she has a business! I'd think we'd need to give her more notice than this to even ask!"

Kokichi was looking somewhere off to the side, cheeks getting pink and his hands pressing together nervously. He couldn't... It was pretty rude to just go up to her after over a decade and ask her to supervise a bunch of young adults and a child on their vacation, right? And even if she had been kind to him back then...

They still got copies of Dr. Kimura's studies and papers to put in the library, but...most of them were only signed off on by her. Compared to older ones that were heavily peer-reviewed. Her pharmacy was fine, not in danger of closing, but...it certainly wasn't the kind of place that was bustling, and the majority of sales came from hygiene products and not medication.

Because of him, her reputation had been ruined. How could he thank her for the thing that had ruined her life? Let alone ask for a favor...

Kaito looked curiously down at his husband, not sure if he recognized this new look. Was he...embarrassed? About what? Just reintroducing himself to her out of nowhere?

Kaito frowned, shrugging a little. "Well, what if we just went and...reintroduced you? Sure, you haven't seen her since you were young, but you're a prince in the city she's a professional in; she's probably been keeping up with you, at least through the rumor mill if nothing else. Maybe she'd think it was nice to hear from you? Besides, didn't you say yesterday how good of an advertisement it was for royalty to use their services? The heir apparent asks her personally to escort him for his first trip away? That's gotta do something for her business cred, right?"

...that, or it'd make people think he was insane. ...oh come on, Kokichi, that's not fair and you know it.

He moved his gaze onto his hands still anxiously pressed together, now worrying his lip too. "...maybe... If...if Shuu-chan goes back to the pharmacy tomorrow, I'll tag along. Maybe get some treats from the candy store on the way back."

...he couldn't let himself chicken out and just go to the candy store, but it was a good prize to ease at least some of his nerves. He had to face Dr. Kimura sometime. On the chance that she didn't regret her report with everything she had...he had to thank her. To show his appreciation for finding out that he wasn't just unreasonable and out of touch, even if it all led to more hurt.

...but god he didn't want to face her alone.

Shyly looking up at Kaito and Maki, Kokichi tried to keep his voice even. "...would you guys wanna come along too?"

Kaito grinned crookedly, deciding...not to mention that King Aiichi had said Kokichi could only go out to town so long as two other people were with him. Wait, had that been a hard rule, or a suggestion? Kaito couldn't remember now...but, well, now wouldn't be the time to test that out.

It was Maki that answered first though. "Sure. If we're going to the beach soon, me and Timothy need to buy some swimsuits anyway, plus some extra things. We'll drop you off and go get him set up."

"I get to go!?" Timothy said, eyes bright with excitement as he looked up at Maki.

"Try not to piss me off between now and tomorrow morning and we'll see."

Kaito chuckled. "Course I want to. What else am I gonna do, hide in our room all day? Another trip into town sounds good." Kaito looked down at his husband, who just still seemed...noticeably uncomfortable. It didn't look like a pain thing, so Kaito wasn't entirely certain what had upset him, but he put down his fork (basically done with his food now anyway), tipped Kokichi's face back up and kissed him on the side of his lip. "It'll be fine. I bet she'll be thrilled to see ya."

Maki glanced up, eyes narrowing. "Your informant’s leaving," she pointed out.

Kokichi nodded with...at least some relief. He'd still be able to go into the pharmacy with Shuuichi...if he went at all... Whatever!! They were going into town just to run some errands, it wasn't that big of a deal!

Though Kaito agreeing to go too brought way more relief to him. They'd just...pop in, say hello, maybe ask about her supervising their trip, then let Shuuichi get to his business with her, and it'd be okay! Even if she said no, it'd be okay! It would!

Kokichi took a breath and let Kaito tip his head back up, giving him a smile for the kiss, a little smug at the quiet, "awww" from across the table. Whatever people thought their relationship was, they did love each other. And, if people could pull their heads out of their asses for a few seconds, they'd notice that.

Though, his head shot to attention at the main source of that misinformation leaving. Hopping up from his chair--he wasn't really hungry for the rest of his food anyway...--Kokichi waved to the coordinator, trying to get her attention. "Tomo-chan! Can you wait up a sec?"

The woman, around Kaito's age, actually, stopped and sent Kokichi a smile, bouncing in place slightly in a way that made her skirt cover flare dramatically. "Hi, 'Kichi! Sure thing, what do you need me for?"

"I have some questions about one of the newer projects you've taken on, can we talk?" Kokichi guided her out of the dining hall, not minding if they were overheard about this, but wanting at least a little more privacy.

As Kaito moved to follow his husband, Maki's hand suddenly shot out, grabbing his sleeve.

"If you need me to talk to her after," Maki said, not looking at him, "tell me."

Kaito gave her a small chuckle, gently shook her arm off, and went to catch up with Kokichi. Heh heh heh...ehhhh. It really could be alarming, having an assassin as a friend sometimes. One day she'd relax. Probably!

When he caught up to them, Kaito smiled, but otherwise stayed quiet, sort of...not wanting to say anything wrong, or upset this person in any way. After all, she had Byakuya's ear...it wouldn't do to make an enemy here. Kaito just let Kokichi lead, trying not to loom over the two shorter people too much.

"I heard that you're relaying info back to Kai-chan's brother; is that right?" Right to the point. No reason to draw this out with dumb tip-toeing.

And, very much like her, Tomomi nodded brightly, giggling as she smoothed back some of her hair. "Uh-huh! This cute guy from the Luminary Party asked if I'd send letters to Byaku about how things are going here; he was such a doll, said that I was the best person to ask since I hear from, like, all sorts of people. It's nice that the Luminary heir wants to hear what the average person over here wants to say, right? So I've just been passing on whatever people say about you guys." Looking between her princes she held the thumb and index fingers of both hands out like she was deciding on the framing for a portrait. "Soooo many people call you guys, like, relationship goals, did you know? There's some less nice stuff too, but, like, all those people didn't even come to the wedding and didn't get to see how adorable you two were, so, like, their loss."

...that was about what he had expected from Tomomi.

Kaito listened to this and, while still maintaining his easy grin, sort of sighed internally. So, Byakuya had just...drawn his own conclusions then. She didn't seem the type to use nefarious wording or try to strain their relationship on purpose, which was what Kaito had been sort of half afraid of. Just someone passing along information and letting his brother do with it what he would.

...which was almost kind of a shame, because, then...how was Kaito going to stop Byakuya from assuming the worst case scenario if the person passing on the information to him was already referring to them as 'relationship goals'? It didn't sound like you could get more well-meaning than that, so...

...sigh. Well, Kaito still had to try, right?

"Thank you for coming to the wedding! It was nice, right? Didn't 'Kichi look amazing?" Kaito bragged, putting his fingers in between Kokichi's and holding his husband's hand, just...reallllly trying to imprint that whole 'healthy relationship' vibe in her head as he said, "Um, look...some of those letters you've been writing to my brother...uh...h-he's been coming to some unfortunate conclusions..."

...god, no part of Kaito wanted to expand on that. It was so fucking embaressing.

"Oh gosh, it was such a lovely time. 'Kichi, you were so gorgeous--I've asked Denji for tips so much I think they're starting to get tired of it. Never thought that was possible, huh?" Tomomi giggled a little more, moving one of her loose braids behind her shoulder and trying to draw attention to the new makeup style she was trying out on the stylist's recommendation.

And, used to her doing such things, Kokichi offered her a smile and gently rubbed the side of Kaito's hand. "I'd say it's worth it--you look really nice today, Tomo-chan!"

The way she lit up at the compliment rivaled the sun. Typical.

"But whoever asked you to write the letters gave you the wrong idea."

And then she calmed back down, blinking in confusion. "What do you mean?"

Kokichi held his free hand out as he explained. "Kaito's brother doesn't want to know what people are chattering about. He wanted someone to give him updates on how Kaito's doing. And, well, you know how ridiculous rumors can get--it's not giving Prince Byakuya the best impression."

Tomomi blinked again before her eyes widened and she covered her mouth with a whispered, "oh no." She pouted and glanced between the princes again, now with something upset in her gaze. "I didn't... WELL! Kai, how are you doing?!" she earnestly demanded the taller prince, remorse replaced with a burning drive to make up for her mistake.

Kaito's shoulders hiked up to his ears, feeling, just, super exposed under her gaze, laughing as he said, a tad loudly, "Great! I am doing great! Me and Kokichi are getting along really well, a-and,"

Fuck, what else did he want Byakuya to hear? Ummmmmmm.....

"-and we're both very happy! Um...oh! And I'm healing really well, and...if you could...not mention the hand?" Kaito asked, releasing Kokichi's hand to wiggle his fingers at her, still covered in a myriad of bandages. "My brother tends to worry about stuff like this, and I don't want him fretting over a small accident, you know?"

Kaito bowed his head slightly, saying with an apologetic grin, "Sorry to bother you with all that, thanks for trying to keep my brother in the loop. I'm sure he really appreciates your time and effort."

The coordinator nodded emphatically with every word Kaito gave her, trying to commit it all to memory, at least long enough to get it written down. She would fix this! And then everyone would be happy! And then she'd just have to check in with Prince Kaito every now and then to get an update to send to his brother. Tomomi didn't really understand why they needed to go through the hassle of her writing what Kaito said when he could just send a letter himself, but it didn't bother her too much. There were a lot of things she didn't understand.

"Got it!" she exclaimed before relaxing slightly and giving the princes another grin. "Hey, he's paying me, so I don't mind at all. I wish I'd got what I was supposed to do from the start, but better late than never! I'll write him a letter so on-point it'll knock his socks off!!"

With that, the young woman turned with a cute little flourish and headed off to her room, muttering under her breath all the things Kaito had said, aiming to get that letter done ASAP. She'd have to apologize to Byaku too about misunderstanding what he wanted...

Kokichi turned to his husband, raising an eyebrow with a pleased grin. "Like I said--Kashi-chan and Tomo-chan are nice. Just...prone to misunderstanding."

Kaito just nodded, doing some mental math. Okay...his letter, written by Kokichi, should get to his brother...Kaito had no idea how soon. Probably soon though, as Byakuya had gotten a letter from Tomomi saying that Kaito had a concussion, and had been able to send a response about it, which arrived here altogether in...a week then? Roughly? Maybe even less. Damn, the postal service was something else. So, Kaito had made that letter, written by Kokichi, four days into the concussion, so...his brother likely had already received his first letter then?

So, then the letter he sent yesterday would probably take another...let's be optimistic, four days at most? And her letter would, obviously, arrive roughly the same or a day later, so long as she sent it today...

So that would be one somewhat sketchy letter done in his husband’s hand, an additional letter done in Kaito's hand, and one letter from one of his informants...who may mention to him that Kaito and Kokichi had come to talk to her personally about it...which might mean she could be viewed as a compromised source...

...ugh, there was no good way of doing any of this, was there. Kaito just had to trust that Byakuya would believe them. That was all there was really left to do.

"Yeah. Everything's gonna work out. It's fine," Kaito decided, looking down at his husband with a small grin. "Do you think it's still worth talking to his second informant? The scribe?"

"I think Kashi-chan has the day off today..." Kokichi hummed, tipping his head against Kaito's arm lightly. "If we see him around tomorrow or, whenever, really, I think it'd be worth havin' a chat, but...I don't think there's too much pressure on it."

"Also, your brother knows Shuu-chan is here, and he'd know that there's no way Shuu-chan would only find one informant, right? So if Tomo-chan corrects herself but Kashi-chan is the same as ever, I think there's less of a chance of Byakuya thinking that I'd found out and threatened them. I can hope, at least." If Kaito's brother had an ounce of reason in him, then that's where Kokichi would lay his hope.

Kokichi sighed a bit, but looked up at his husband with a smile. "With that, though... I am feeling a lot better, so I'm not desperate to go back to bed or anything. What do you wanna do now? Once Maki-chan and Tim finish eating, we could hang out or something?"

Normally, Kokichi would just work more. What else would he do? There was no one he could really spend time with, and while he had spent many an evening reading, they were fewer compared to the evenings he took up his pen. But now? He did have people to spend time with, and he'd sorted out work as much as he could without actually writing the letters, which, at this point, he'd just do himself probably tomorrow.

Kaito relaxed. Yeah...that was a good idea. Leaving one informant to write as normal while the other one was talked to, but their letters not hugely contradicting each other regardless? That would probably be proof enough.

"Hmmmm..." Kaito hummed to himself, wondering what they could fill the evening with. What would be fun? What would be...Kaito suddenly grinned, but looked around. Leaning down, he cupped his hand around Kokichi's ear, and whispered. "Wanna learn how to throw knives?"

Kokichi perked up, eyes widening, though that was as much of his true reaction as he let show. His true reaction, which would probably look a lot like Kokichi taking Kaito's hand and jumping up and down excitedly in a circle. Instead, he kept it all inside, though his eyes glittered.

"Sounds good," he managed, casually. "I don't think they'll be much longer, so we can just chill here for a sec?"

Where, where, where to do it?! Someplace no one else would be, somewhere where people wouldn't be able to hear the "thumps" of knives landing in walls...or clattering to the ground. Somewhere where the marks wouldn't be seen...

"Mmmm, I think I know a place that'd work...we'll check it out all together, okay?"

No one had been to the basement since the wedding. Perfect.

"I don't want to go to school," Tim muttered, stabbing into his food as Maki finished up the last of her meal. "Especially not with a bunch of dirt-jumpers."

"I don't recall asking if you wanted to go to school," Maki replied quietly, eyes narrowing at the military slur. At least the boy had the headspace to not say it loudly, though she wasn't sure if any of the Diceans would recognize it. "And I don't understand why you wouldn't want to go anyway. It's an incredible opportunity for you. I didn't get to start going to school until I was twelve. I'd have loved to been able to go since nine."

"I'm already learned enough. I can read and write and I know some maths," Timothy argued, his shoulders rising a little as he said hotly, "A soldier don't need mor-"

"You're not a soldier anymore," Maki whispered, her tone tense. Warning. "And you never will be again. Let that go. It's not an option for you anymore."

Timothy's feet kicked into the ground under the table beneath him. "Yeah, yeah...I'm an assassin now. I know..."

Maki sighed. Had she ever sounded so disappointed, when she was a kid, to be given what was considered one of the most respected careers an orphan could aspire to, so long as they survived the training? She didn't recall ever feeling that way...but, then, perhaps she had felt like that, once or twice. She remembered furious fights with her mentor, which had ended up with her locked away in the dark until the wind had gone out of her sails...until she was calm enough, eager even, to leave the dark and try again, less willing to argue each time, to risk being put back in the dark...

...maybe her own childhood wasn't a good example for what she wanted for Timothy.

She didn't know how to help raise a child. But she knew that sending him to a bright, sunny school filled with other children was the exact opposite of what had happened for her, and that had to be a half decent start. Plus... "You should be more appreciative, especially considering your history here. Your princes are genuinely looking out for you, trying to give you your best chance here. Do you have any idea how lucky you are? Think of what your brothers and sisters back home are going through. You don't think any of them wouldn't want to be in your position in a heartbeat? Think of what you could do with an education here. You could help them someday. You owe it to them to make use of this."

Timothy tensed at this...before his shoulders relaxed. Pouting, his eyes slightly red. "...yeah?"

"Yes," Maki said, her tone confident. Certain.

Timothy looked up at her, brow furrowed. "...how?"

Maki closed her eyes, digging her nails into her palm. Not sure how to answer this...before saying, "You'll have to get an education and figure that out yourself. But you'll never get the chance to if you keep lashing out at every opportunity everyone gives you. That includes turning away that Dicean woman who keeps trying to look after you. You should at least let her close enough to see if you could learn anything useful from her. You never know what could help."

Maki sighed, Timothy not saying anything to this, but at least not wrinkling up his nose and looking skeptical this time. "Put our plates away. It's time to free up our seats," Maki ordered.

After Timothy went to deliver their plates to the kitchen, the two headed out, looking surprised to see Kaito and Kokichi still there. "Everything alright?" Maki asked.

"Mmmmmhm!!" Kokichi hummed cheerily, a little too pumped about learning how to throw knives?!?!?!? To really give the situation any sort of seriousness. "I was right, Tomo-chan was just confused. And now she can explain all that to Kai-chan's brother too--it's alllll good!"

Rocking back on his heels gently--he still had enough sense to not purposefully and needlessly provoke any further pain--he grinned at the assassins. "Buuuuut Kai-chan had a really cool idea of something to do if you wanted to hang out? It's something Maki-chan asked me about a while ago, and I totally forgot to answer, so I can just show you now, yeah?"

He wasn't sure if she'd get it, the moment where she'd asked him if he had any preferred weapons very brief and insignificant to what came next... But it wasn't a huge deal. He was just trying to give her a heads up.

Gently taking Kaito's hand, Kokichi started to lead the way to the basement. "I gotta show Maki-chan over here though, alright?"

Maki looked over at Kaito, her eyebrow slightly raised, who just gave her a half grin and a nervous shrug in return. "It's probably fine now," Kaito said quietly to her, before allowing himself to be led away, smirking down at the practically vibrating prince. Maki and Timothy followed behind.

A question he hadn't answered yet? The only thing that immediately sprung to mind was her request that he sit down with her so she could debrief him on her skill sets, but that was probably because she had been working on that all day. What else could he be referring to... "Miss Harukawa!" Timothy said, tugging at her sleeve a little as he pointed to a familiar door. "This is where the dead horse was! It was super, super gross!" Timothy said, his tone suggesting that he, in fact, thought it was pretty cool, how super gross it had been, and wanted to share that good vibe with his mentor.

Kaito looked back at Timothy, his brow a knot of concern as he realized, oh, yeah, they were definitely heading to the basement, huh. "You saw Koh, Tim?" Kaito asked, "When?"

Timothy shrugged, suddenly reserved as he wondered if he hadn't supposed to or something as he answered. "After you all left, I went down to take a look to see what everyone was doing. And there was a big, dead horse down there and a bunch of people mopping. I helped bring up some of the buckets," Timothy added in, a touch of pride in his voice. He hated Diceans, of course, but he had stepped up when he saw a bunch of servants struggling to get bucket-loads of blood cleaned up. He had managed to bring up three buckets in total, though admittedly the last one had been really tough to carry because he had been tired by that point and he had ended up spilling a lot of it by the time he had gotten to where they were dumping it.

He didn't see those particular servants, very often...but every now and again someone would give him a small smile and a little wave and Tim, with some embarrassment, would wave back, recognizing it was one of the basement servants he had helped.

Kaito, in turn, glanced at Kokichi, a touch of concern in his eyes, hoping his husband wouldn't mind the subject, before turning back to Tim, a proud smile on his face as he let go of Kokichi's hand for a moment to give Tim's hair an affectionate ruffle as he said, "You did?! That's awesome! Thanks for helping take care of Koh like that!"

Tim looked a little annoyed at the head pat, but his chest inflated at the thanks.

"So, what are we doing then?" Maki asked, as they got to the door.

Kokichi hesitated slightly as they got to the door, but...everything had been cleaned up. That had been the point of doing the sacrifice thing down there in the first place. And it'd be a little too cliche if they left the basement of the castle smelling like blood, so...it'd be fine. And if it wasn't, then, well, he'd just have to think of another place.

Waiting until they started to walk down the stairs, the door closed behind them, Kokichi still didn't answer Maki directly. No one just passing by the area in front of the door would hear them, but...it paid to be careful.

"You asked me before what kind of weapon I preferred, right?" A few moments of pause, then a better answer. "Well, I don't really know if I prefer them, and you know fighting's not really my sort of thing, but I tried to teach myself to throw knives when I was a teenager before it ended up with my kitchen ban and every possible sharp thing confiscated." Kokichi rolled his eyes, sounding annoyed but not really outraged at what had happened. It was just what his life was like.

The basement didn't smell like blood, thank fuck. One of the walls looked like it had been plastered over recently, and the floor looked a little water damaged, but...if you hadn't known, there was no way to tell that a horse had been bled out down there. And that was how Kokichi liked it.

Once they actually got down to the basement, Kokichi hopped himself around, looking at Maki with hope in his eyes. "Kai-chan said you could probably teach me, so, could you? Even if not, this still isn't something we can really talk about with others around, so sorry for dragging you all into the basement," he sheepishly chuckled.

Kaito's eyes immediately went to where the horse had been, making a silent prayer to Atua, but Maki tilted her head at Kokichi. "You're not allowed to hold sharp objects?" Maki asked, clearly confused by the idea. "Is this something you could get into trouble for, then?"

"I'll do it! I'll show him how to do it! I'm not scared!" Timothy volunteered, practically sneering at the idea of breaking some dumb new Dicean rule, though he hadn't quite understood what Kokichi had meant and was assuming that Diceans in general weren't allowed to hold sharp objects. "Is that why they made us practice with wooden weapons for so long, Miss Harukawa? What a bunch of wimps."

"We did that to stop people worrying. We're allowed to carry sharp objects, Timothy. Now stop being a brat and go pull that crate out a bit. That will be our target," Maki instructed, watching the child spring into action. The crate didn't actually have to be moved to work as a target, but having the kid spend some energy working out how to move something as big as himself would calm him down a bit.

"You gonna show him how to do it then, Maki-Roll?" Kaito asked, grinning as he went to a far wall and sat down comfortably next to it, happy to just watch them play around. "There's a chance the king could get real pissed at us, ya know."

Maki shrugged. "I don't work for him. Besides, the prince should know how to handle weapons, and throwing knives is as good a start as any."

"Hrrrrrrgggghhh!" Timothy grunted, having climbed over the boxes and, pushing off the wall, had moved the crate away from the wall and more into the center of the room. Breathing heavily, Timothy asked, "Th-that far enough?"

"Good job, Tim. Alright, hard rule: so long as knives are out, no one but me goes anywhere near that box, not even to pick up knives, understand? I'm not talking anywhere closer than...mmm..." Maki considered the flooring and, about four feet from the box, threw a dagger, which as usual seemed to appear from nowhere, into the flooring, the tip lodging into the stone flooring with a crack. "There. No closer, understood? Alright, Timothy, Kokichi, come here. Timothy, you've done this before, so I want you to try first. Kokichi, watch him, and then I'll explain to you what he did when it's your turn. Now wait here while I make a target."

Maki, pulling the dagger from the flooring, which had left a noticeable mark to reference, went to the box, straightened a little, and then using her blade, scratched out a medium sized circle on the center of the box. Stepping back to consider her handiwork, she went back to the prince and the boy. "The goal, ultimately, is to hit the box, but learning to hit within the circle will improve accuracy. So if you think you can do it, go for it, but don't worry about it if you can't. Remember, neither of you, once this training starts, are to go anywhere near that side of the room for any reason. One last safety thing," she said, taking out a knife from nowhere and, handing Timothy the blunt end of the knife, she immediately grabbed Kokichi, repositioning him a few steps behind her, "When one of you is holding a knife, the other one stands behind me. You do not go in front of me for any reason, you understand?"

Timothy, carefully keeping the knife pressed to his thigh as he did so, bowed to her, saying, "Yes, Miss Harukawa!"

Kokichi sighed a bit, nodding. "That's why I couldn't talk to you about it before. If someone overheard that I was interested in learning something DaNgErOuS," he obviously mocked, "then they'd tell Aiichi and he'd... I dunno. Hire someone to follow me around and stop it? Keep me trapped in my room until I give it up? Something like that." Again, he said all this as if it was just something that happened, though he wasn't happy about it.

And, for him, it was something that just happened. Every time he strayed close to something that would potentially be able to hurt him, Kokichi was pulled away at the speed of light. If he tried to resist, then he was considered unable to look out for himself and would be monitored. And...it certainly didn't help his case when he did get hurt, and for all the days of bedrest to fix him, he was constantly reminded that it was his own fault for trying something that just wasn't meant for him.

And, for some things at least, Kokichi had to accept that after so long.

But this? Learning how to throw knives from a professional assassin was probably safer than going for a walk. And while Kokichi sincerely never wanted the skill to be anything more than a cool trick...it was good to know just in case. If someone was able to put Kaito into a corner and Maki and Shuuichi weren't there...Kokichi had to be able to protect his husband when running and words weren't an option.

That all said, he certainly understood the danger blades held for him. Kokichi listened intently to everything Maki said and didn't fuss when she moved him behind her, though he had to lean slightly to be able to still see Timothy. Maki wasn't even that tall, but she was still taller than him. How unfair...

"Got it," he replied without any theatrics, still feeling casual about this, but wanting to let Maki know that he wasn't about to goof off.

Kaito could feel himself tense at the mention of the king having Kokichi followed, and felt something dangerous in him stir at the mention of him being locked away in his room...and felt a little better when he saw Maki's eyes narrow at that as well, feeling a little more vindicated in how fucking mad at everyone in this god damn castle Kaito was all the time. The way Kokichi talked about it all, the way everyone here did, was sometimes enough to make Kaito start to doubt whether he had any right to feel as protective of his husband as he was...but he knew that protective, slightly murderous look on Maki's face anywhere.

Honestly, he had to sit down with her and Shuuichi one of these days and really talk to them about what Kokichi's situation here was. Shuuichi probably understood it better than Maki did already, but it would be a comfort to Kaito knowing that both of his friends understood what the castle staff was actually like with Kokichi, and to have two more sets of eyes looking out for him.

Heh...imagine if one of them tried that 'knocking out' shit with Maki around...heh heh...

As Kaito chuckled to himself by the wall at what was an, admittedly, extremely dark daydream, Timothy aimed his blade, brows furrowed as he tried to remember the stance he was supposed to take. Focus...focus...

He threw the blade, watched it spin...and then it bounced off the side of the box, landing a foot away from it. "Awww," Timothy pouted.

"Why 'awww'. You hit it. Look, it made a mark." Maki pointed out the small scratch lightly in the wood.

"But it didn't stick," Timothy said.

"It doesn't have to. So long you made a scratch, it counts. If you want it to stick, put more strength into it. Again." She handed Timothy another blade, and as she did so, she said to Kokichi, "Alright, Kokichi, watch his arm. You're going to notice he doesn't move his wrist at all. It's not like with a ball, you're not throwing from the wrist. To make an angled blade fly straight, you have to trust your biceps. These muscles here." Maki looked behind her and reached out, touching the upper part of Kokichi's arms...and frowned.

"We'll work on those," she said, letting him go, turning back to Timothy. "But when it's your turn, we're gonna move a little closer. Alright, Tim...go."

Timothy, fixing his footing a bit, tried again, throwing harder with a little "Ha!"...and then groaned as this time, super obviously, the blade didn't even connect with the box on the correct side, hitting it with the blunt end.

"Too much spin, Tim!" Kaito called from the other side of the room, his tone relaxed and lazy. "You just heard her tell Kokichi. It's not in the wrist, bud!"

"I did it with the stupid stick weapons we used out in the courtyard," Tim muttered, looking up at Maki for advice. "Why isn't it working now?"

"Different weight and balance. If you are ever in an actually dangerous situation, never try using a weapon you're not specifically practiced with, even if it's the exact same kind of weapon that you usually use. Especially if one is made of wood and the other isn't. It's always gonna feel different and your first few swings or hits aren't gonna land right. Last chance, then it's Kokichi's turn. Listen to me and Prince Kaito and stop trying to be flashy in front of Kokichi. No one's impressed with your footwork if you can't land it."

She handed him another blade, Timothy taking the blade with a small, embarrassed flush. H-he hadn't been trying to show off specifically for Prince Kokichi! He was just...it looked cooler with the right pose, is all! Whatever!

Determined to not look at either of them now, Timothy focused on the throw, but this time without overthinking it, since he was distracted at being called out. Throwing hard and straight, the blade only did one full turn, and then...

"Yes! Ha!" Timothy said, jumping into the air! "Look at that! It's even in the circle!"

"Good job," Maki said, putting her hand on his shoulder and leading him behind her as she said to Kokichi, "Your turn. Give it a try first, and then I'll fix your stance." She produced a knife (okay, how many on her person did she actually have??) for him.

Kokichi watched Timothy's movements carefully, though he took them as more of a guide than something to copy exactly. Though Tim was learning from the master, and Maki undoubtedly had corrected anything too incorrect, he was still learning. The form he took was still different enough to what Kokichi had tried before, however, so his internal notes were quite detailed.

Alright...stance like that...angled like this...throw harder than you think if you want it to stick...

Kokichi was broken from his analysis briefly when Maki turned to him, snorting softly at her reaction to his distinct lack of muscle. He could do what he needed to in daily life, but, let's just say he'd have a harder time moving that crate than Timothy had.

Okay. Keep your wrist straight--at least he'd already been doing that with his method. And then...

He gave Tim a small smile, hopefully easing the boy's embarrassment. If he had been trying to show off...that was pretty sweet, actually. Even if it was just to show how much more practiced he was than Kokichi. Maybe the trip wouldn't be as awkward between them as he'd thought.

When Timothy landed his first embedded knife, Kokichi gave him some claps and a fuller grin before turning to Maki, walking up the few steps that she led him to. "This is kinda different from how I tried, but that makes sense when you think about it. At least now I have a great example to follow!"

His cheer calmed as Maki handed him a knife, feeling the metaphorical weight along with the physical. This was the second time in recent memory he'd been given a blade and...this time would be different. It'd be okay. No painful Luminary-style lessons coming out of the blue.

Reproducing Timothy's stance as best he could, Kokichi regarded the target on the crate. Just make contact, but aim for it if you can. Holding the knife the way he'd seen--different, but he could make it work--Kokichi drew his arm back and set his wrist before letting the knife fly!!

And completely missing the crate, the blade tinking against the wall behind it.

Timothy snickered, and without even looking at him, Maki reached backwards and whacked him over the head, her expression not changing at all as she said, "You're trying too hard to get it to stick, when you should be focusing on learning its weight first. A strong throw, admittedly, often is a more accurate throw as well as being a more dangerous throw, but when you're first learning the weapon’s weight and balance, a slower, less forceful throw can be useful to get the range."

Internally, she thought to herself: maybe his arm strength would require even less distance between him and the box...but she didn't want to embarrass him by immediately moving him even closer. Besides, if he could get the technique down, that could make up for the lack of arm strength without adding any additional help. She'd keep giving him the chance to try until it became undeniable more adjustments needed to be made.

"You've heard the phrase, slow is smooth, smooth is fast, 'Kichi?" Kaito called out, watching all this with such a warm, comfortable affection, just grinning at the whole thing. "Same with strength-based stuff! Slow is smooth! Smooth is strong!"

"Sure, like that," Maki said, somewhat amused at her backseat teacher. If Kaito wasn't careful, she was going to make him put his throwing arm where his mouth was. She handed Kokichi another knife. "Try it again."

...well, he had been throwing knives--or, really, just one knife that he retrieved after every of the handful of attempts he'd been able to try--at a wall before. Old habits die hard?

Okay, don't focus on throwing hard. Just aim and let the knife's weight do the work. Accommodate for it. Kokichi turned back to raise an eyebrow at Kaito--he hadn't heard that phrase before, but he got the gist--before accepting his next try from Maki, nodding. "Slower, learn the weight."

Again, he got into the position he used before--if Maki hadn't corrected him, he'd assume he'd gotten it right--and took a breath. Arm up, focus more on the movement of the arc, don't worry about speed or force. Take aim and let go--now!

...or...what should've been just before 'now'.

Kokichi had accepted that he'd kinda suck--that's what learning was about! But he still burned as he stared blankly at the knife sticking in the ground about halfway between him and the crate. He knew what he'd done wrong...but...

"Ha ha ha!" Timothy cackled, raising his hands instinctively to try to fight off another blow to the head, though no new blow came as Maki was actually looking at the way the knife was sticking out with a raised eyebrow.

"Huh," she hummed. "You made it stick. Not bad."

"What!? He didn't even come close to hitting the box!" Timothy protested, and this time Maki did hit him again. "Ow! But he didn't!"

Kokichi's footing wasn't really accurate, if he was trying to imitate Timothy, but Maki wasn't worried about his footing, the angled stance more about defensive maneuvers than throwing in a straight line (if enemies were coming from all directions, you needed a stance that would give you a range of motion to throw in any direction quickly. That might be useful to teach Kokichi someday, but not right now). However, his shoulder.

She had one more knife available, carrying six in total, but she told everyone to hold on and went to collect the knives, bringing the five back as she handed Kokichi another one. "Here, the throw wasn't bad, but you need to lean on your shoulder more. Your biceps can't do anything if you're not ready to swing into it. Like this, feel this?" she coached, taking his shoulder and, slowly, pulling and pushing it forward and backwards, his waist following the movement automatically as she grabbed his wrist, showing how much of a swing it was. "Try replicating the throw you just made, but with that additional swing. Also, before you swing, take a breath, and then throw when you take the breath out. It clears your head and makes you more aware of where your limbs are. Okay. Again."

"You got this, 'Kichi! Fucking kill that box!" Kaito encouraged, clapping with a small chuckle.

That was something, he supposed. But it really was better to be accurate than strong. Getting a knife to stick into something was more of a detriment if it didn't go where you wanted it to.

Kokichi kept himself pliable to Maki's coaching, trying to focus on how the movements felt so he could do it without her help, at least eventually. It was more horizontal torque than the vertical he was used to, but for this style it was what was needed. For the breathing, he'd been close, but more just to ensure his aim than to create any sort of calmness.

"I'd rather you save your applause for when I actually touch the box, Kai-chan," Kokichi smirked back at his husband before getting ready for his last attempt, if they were going three and three back and forth.

Slow was good, just release sooner. Twist more from your shoulder to your hips. This time...make the swing a full movement.

Breathe in, swing back, breathe out and forward and-!

It didn't hit the target, but right in the corner of the crate the knife stuck out, seemingly precariously placed in the small area of wood between the edge of the corner and one of the nails holding that part of the crate in place.

"Heeeey! I can clap now, right?" Kaito asked, clapping enthusiastically as Maki smirked, pleased. "Fucking hell yeah! That box never stood a damn chance!"

"Well, now we know that if there's anyone dangerous to the far right of Kokichi's vision, he's got us covered," Maki teased lightly, relaxing slightly at his first real sign of progress, grabbing his shoulder and, like she had for Timothy earlier, pulling him behind her as Tim took an excited step forward. "Good job, Kokichi. Just focus on doing that for your next three turns. Your stance and throw will improve with practice. Alright, Timothy, same with you. Let's try going one after another. I'll stop you if I want to point something out."

"Hey! Hey! Kokichi!" Kaito said in a mock whisper, waving his arm at his husband, "Come here, real quick, while Tim's going!"

He hit it. Nice. There was a little pleased smile on Kokichi's face as he regarded his temporarily embedded blade, accepting the praise he got this time. This wasn't going to be one of those actually impossible things for him. He wasn't great, yeah, but he'd get better with practice, and maybe one day he'd be able to reliably hit his target. And he'd never use that skill except for the express purpose of showing it off. But, like lock-picking, it was another tool in his belt to pull out when a situation needed it.

Kokichi looked over at his husband as Tim started up on his turn, sneering playfully and gesturing to the woman in front of him. "Uh-uh. Unless Maki-chan's moving with me too, I'm not going anywhere. Who knows what could happen if I'm not behind a deflector shield?"

It was probably fine, as long as he didn't step in front of the invisible barrier of where she was standing, but Kokichi felt like being a little contrary. Just for fun. "If you wanted to give me a prize, I think you should set higher standards."

Kaito pouted, slumping into the back of the wall. "Awwww...but I haaaaave no standards...Maaaaaakiiii, Kokichi won't-AHH!" Kaito reflectively put his arm up in front his face, not seeing the blade but hearing it THUMP! into the wall right next to his ear, startling him more than anything as he said, "Hey, come on! Why!?"

"Don't distract me while I'm trying to watch Timothy throw," Maki said, keeping her eyes on her charge as she passed him another knife, his first throw once against hitting the box at an angle that caused it to bounce away from it. To Kokichi, again without turning her eyes away, she ordered, "Kokichi. Bring me my knife back, and shut your husband up."

She then stopped Timothy in the middle of his second throw, tapping her foot into the back of his knee as she said to him, "If you lock it, not only are you losing blood flow, but when someone goes to sweep your legs out from under you, it’s gonna hurt a lot more than it otherwise would. Like this..."

Kokichi snickered, shrugging in a bit of a 'what did you expect' way to Kaito. All this was...surprisingly comfortable. Whining and teasing each other, learning something new, just...hanging out with people without any airs. He sort of wished Shuuichi could've joined them, but it was way better for the detective to sleep off the booze in his system. Maybe if they got around to more lessons then he could join in.

Making sure to keep behind Maki, Kokichi skipped over to Kaito and, after a few tugs, dislodged the knife from the wall, setting it carefully down on the ground a little bit away and with the blade pointed away before kneeling to the side of his husband.

"What, feeling left out? You'd school both me and Tim, but I can't imagine that's very impressive, to be better than two people who are learning." Kokichi grinned at Kaito teasingly before bopping his head against his shoulder gently. "Thank you for the totally over the top acknowledgement of my first non-failure, though. I can't wait to see Kai-chan's reaction when I actually manage something astounding."

"I'm not feeling left out. It's fun being on the other side of this, actually. Maki taught me and Shuuichi years and years ago, and trust me, I missed a thousand times. Oh my god!" Kaito said, his eyes widening as he snickered at a sudden old memory. "One time, I threw too hard at a tree, the knife bounced off, and actually shot, like, behind us in this huge arc, and landed blade down in the dirt, like, five feet behind us. If anyone had been standing there, oh-hoho, that would have sucked so much for them. And you know what?" Kaito said, lowering his voice as he glanced over at Maki, "That was the first time I ever saw Maki just straight up belly laugh? She was amazed. Had apparently never seen anything like it before. So, trust me, you can't miss any worse than she's already seen. Anyway, come here-"

Kaito reached out and wrapped his arm around Kokichi's hip, pulling him down onto his lap and leaning over for a kiss, sucking at his lower lip as he breathed him in for a moment, before letting go and kissing him on his cheek too. "A good luck kiss. Go destroy that nine-year-old! You got this, babe!"

"Ewwww," Timothy groaned, having finished his third throw and catching just the tail end of that. "What are you doing??"

"Kaito, keep your hands to yourself for, honestly, just five minutes, would you? You're going to distract him," Maki said, glaring at her prince, who grinned sheepishly back at her. "Your turn, Kokichi. Also why is my knife just laying on the ground in the middle of the room? I said bring it back to me," Maki said, her tone clearly scolding as Timothy snickered beside her.

"My bad, my bad. Fine, leave me, go throw your sharp sticks or whatever." Kaito pouted, holding his arm up in surrender. Winking up at Kokichi, he said, a tad wolfishly, "Go. Astound me."

Kokichi shook his head in disbelief, feeling a little more worried about standing behind Maki, but, like, she had been there, so she likely accounted for freak accidents like that and would act appropriately. So, mostly, it was just a funny story. "Physics are freaky sometimes. Wild."

His unbothered presence was soon broken by a squeak as Kaito pulled him down and...well, it's not like Kokichi straight up forgot Maki and Tim were in the room or anything. But...when Kaito kissed him like that and stole his breath, it got a little harder to think clearly, and when his husband pulled away Kokichi was red and breathing a little heavier, dazed before the others chimed in and sent him to cover his face with his hands.

God. It was very in the vein of what Luminaries would find appealing, but was barely hitting his mark that hot to Kaito?

Kokichi groaned in embarrassment as he got up and returned the knife to Maki, pouting at her even if he couldn't quite meet her gaze. "You also told me to shut my husband up--if you expect both at the same time, then it's Maki-chan's fault for giving an impossible order."

What normally would've been a good point in a joking argument was severely undercut by the fact that Kokichi's cheeks kept getting redder.

Maki considered her flustered charge before rolling her eyes, saying back to the Luminary prince, "Hey! You do that again in the middle of training, I'm putting you on the target circle, got it?"

Kaito's eyes went wide at this, though probably not for what Maki was thinking as he said, "Oh, we should totally show them that! I mean, Tim, don't do it yourself or Maki will kill you, but Maki can actually do this thing where she makes an outline of you using knives. It's really cool actually!"

"What? Really? Can we see, Miss Harukawa!?" Tim asked, his eyes going bright at the idea of seeing such a cool trick, bouncing on the balls of his feet. "We can, right!?"

"Do you both wanna die!?" Maki asked, temple twitching with frustration before deciding to ignore the both of them, turning back to Kokichi. "Alright, I'm gonna pass you a knife, one after another. If I don't stop you, consider it an invitation to keep throwing, understand? Don't get discouraged if you miss, you'll get into a rhythm soon. After this, both of you will throw six at a time, taking little time between each throw, and we'll keep going till I get tired of it."

"Ugh. You never get tired," Timothy muttered, too many training sessions in the immediate past proving it.

...okay, that did sound super cool, if something that would give him a heart attack if anyone but Maki tried. But maybe it'd be better for an end of training thing rather than in the middle of it. Taking a few cooling breaths, trying to get over his loving idiot, Kokichi drew himself up to look at Maki and the target properly again.

Throwing one after another actually seemed like it'd be easier, though getting easy feedback was good for a start. Considering the movement of the swing, just being able to let himself pendulum and not break stride seemed like the best way to really get used to the movement.

Laughing a little at Timothy's exasperation, Kokichi offered him a half-hearted apologetic smile. "Then we'll keep going. Sorry to pull you into another lesson, but this is one I really wanted."

And then, taking the first knife from Maki, he started throwing. He missed the first, but just barely, then the second, while it didn't stick in, did hit the box. The third didn't stick in either, the angle a little too wrong, but did make a noticeable slash in the wood.

Maki nodded at that last throw; as far as damage went it easily being the best throw so far. It was the kind of hit that could seriously hurt someone, if it landed in the right spot. Good.

"Alright, I'm gonna go collect," Maki said, needing to go ahead the box again and collect the knives that had gone over as well. When she got back, she was mildly pleased to see neither the prince nor her charge had moved while she was away, which at least meant they were taking her safety instructions seriously, even if it didn't super matter so long as she had access to all the knives.

She went back to her spot between them. "Switch," Maki instructed, not feeling the need to pull or push anyone this time, confident both her students had the routine worked out now as Kokichi stepped behind her and Timothy moved around to the front. It was rare for there to be any real accidents around the thrower, but if either of them lost their grip in a throw and accidentally threw it behind them, Maki would prefer it hit her if it was going to hit anyone. First of all, she'd be able to take a hit far better then a hemophobic with no body weight to speak of and a literal child, and second of all, it...was just the thing a person in charge was supposed to do. Take the brunt of any possible fallout that could occur, for the sake of the ones she was leading. She had done the same for Kaito and Shuuichi, a long time ago, though, admittedly, protecting Kaito by standing in front of him was more a symbolic gesture than anything else. At the least, the blade wouldn't have hit his chest or stomach anyway.

"Alright, I'm handing you six in a row. Someday you'll hold the extra daggers yourself, but for now, just wait for the knife to appear in front of you and then grab it. One after another. Ready...go!"

Maki handed him the first one, throw. Hit and stick! Timothy didn't have any time to celebrate, the next blade in front of him, and in his fluster at the excitement and the increased pace, he missed the next two entirely. "Breathe," Maki instructed sternly, "And take a second. You don't have to throw as soon as it's in your hands."

Timothy nodded, getting in a deep breath. The next three were all hits, though one just barely made it onto the box at all, but the last one was a stick, and actually got to the center! "Look! It's in the circle!" Timothy said, turning to Kokichi and pointing, thrilled, before looking over at Kaito. "Prince Kaito, look, look!"

"Heck yeah, look at that! Good job, Timothy! High five!" Kaito prompted, holding his good arm up as Timothy, in his excitement, rushed to go give it to him, laughing giddily as Maki watched the two of them with a pleased smile before saying to Kokichi, "Gonna go collect the knives. Stay."

Again, she picked them all up, inspecting the box with some amount of pride. There were two potentially killing blows in here. Both accidents, no doubt, but it was still a damn good sign. Going back to Kokichi, she said, "You were listening to what I said to Tim, right? Same instructions. Wait for the knife to appear, don't forget to breathe, and if you don't feel steady, don't throw until you do. Now...go!"

There was something about Maki's instruction that reminded Kokichi a lot of Ikuo. No fluff, actionable advice, and such a sense of safety that it allowed the person being taught to just focus on whatever they needed to do. It was easier to accept that you'd make mistakes if you could be sure that they wouldn't be irreversible. And, in an environment like that, it was easy to make progress.

Kokichi lit up at Tim's hit, able to give the boy a proud, excited smile for the moment he had his attention before it was given to Kaito. Timothy wouldn't have to be an assassin, but it could be his own choice. And, if he decided to stick with it...Kokichi could see him becoming quite skilled under Maki's tutelage. It wouldn't be a lucrative job, but they'd be proud of what he could grow to do all the same.

Giving Maki a quick nod, he took the first knife and...went!

He and Tim continued trading off, the actual assassin in training doing better on average than Kokichi, though the prince was able to hit the box more often than not as time went on. He even managed to land one in the circle, though Tim had managed about five at that point.

Then, at the end of one of Kokichi's turns, the slight ache that had been growing in his arm decided it was time for the lesson to end. All of a sudden his wrist spasmed as he let go of the knife, provoking a small, surprised, gasped sound of pain while the knife went faaaaaaar right, hitting the corner of the room and spinning on the floor, thankfully losing speed way before it even came close to one of them.

Holding his wrist to his chest and trying to hide a wince, Kokichi turned to Maki with a strained smile. "I...think that may be it for me tonight."

Kaito, who had been half zoning out at the end there, just quietly letting the wave of small chatter and clunks of metal hitting wood soothingly roll over him, suddenly jolted, eyes wide at the sound of Kokichi in pain as he asked, "Maki?"

Maki gave Kaito a dismissive wave, cool. "He's fine. Let me see your wrist, Kokichi," she demanded, though her grip and movement was gentle as she forced the man to move his hand away from his chest, inspecting it. A little red on the underside of his wrist, and there was a tightness in the hand muscles...hmm...it reminded her a little of an older assassin her mentor had introduced her to, who had been starting to get arthritis. She wondered if maybe some sort of flexible wrap would give him better control and ease the pain when it showed up...hmmm...

It was something to think about. She'd try it on him their next training, whenever the prince was ready to try again. For now, she said, "Alright, that's enough then. Good job to both of you. Put some ice on this, Kokichi, you'll be fine." She assured him, letting go of her grip so he could take his hand back. Turning to Timothy, she said sternly, "You're showing promise, so guess who's going to be doing this regularly from now on? Also, remember, an assassin who can't keep secrets is not worth anything for one, and will likely find themselves killed by their own people someday. Kokichi's use of knives is not to be discussed outside of this basement with anyone, not even ourselves or Shuuichi. You never know who is listening. Got it?"

"Yes, Miss Harukawa," Timothy said, bowing politely before saying, eyes shining, "Are you gonna show us the trick then!? An outline of knives?!"

Maki sighed, glaring at Kaito, who had gotten up and, after stretching a moment, went to go check on his husband, and was already thinking about how he'd put more massage oil on his wrist to help with the ache as she said, "Why did you bring that up? Do you just live to frustrate me?"

"Come on, Maki, you used to love that trick! We showed it to everyone back in high school! It was super popular!"

Maki had been actively competing with another badass bladed woman who, NO, she was NOT intimidated by...but the two had often found themselves performing increasingly dangerous stunts around each other, especially back when Maki's prince and her rival's master had been openly feuding with each other. Fucking bitch thought she was just so cool... "I'm grown now. It's a dangerous trick, you could get hurt."

Kaito raised an eyebrow at her, entirely disbelieving. "With you throwing? Do you think you'd actually miss?"

"...that's not the point-"

"Let's let Kokichi decide," Kaito decided, kissing the top of his husband's skull. "You wanna see Maki do a cool knife trick, 'Kichi? End your first training session on a real fun note?" he said with a smirk.

Kokichi felt bad when he heard the worried sound of Kaito's voice, but...anyone would be worried if someone they cared about made a pained sound! It was a natural response! Kaito wasn't about to tell him he shouldn't do this ever again over a sore wrist.

Giving Maki a kind, appreciative smile, Kokichi took his wrist back, rubbing it a little himself. "Thanks for the lesson, Maki-chan. I appreciate you giving me a chance, especially when I just kinda sprung it on ya. One of these days I'll get all six in the circle."

Because he'd get to practice until he could. Because, for once...this wasn't going to be taken away from him. They all understood, or understood the meaning of secrecy, in Tim's case, that it was important for this to be kept between them--what happens in the basement, stays in the basement.

Kokichi pressed against Kaito affectionately before rolling his eyes at his husband's weak attempt at strong-arming his friend. "If Maki-chan doesn't wanna do it, she doesn't wanna do it. Considering this was our first lesson, practically, it'd be better to just keep the advice she gave us in mind without being distracted by something really cool. If anything, Maki-chan can keep it over our heads as a treat for the future."

The leader in him done mediating, he gave Maki a grin before turning to go back up the stairs. "Though, it does sound like a really impressive trick. Something a main character in a spy novel does to make some fussy rich fuck piss their pants when they're being too demanding."

"You think so? I think I know a few rich fucks who could use some humbling," Maki said, her tone dark, a small smirk on her face. "I'll keep it in mind."

"Awwwww," Tim groaned, turning to Kaito with a disapproving look as he whispered, "You totally blew it."

"Hey, come on, it's not my fault! You wouldn't even know she could do it if I hadn't said anything," Kaito whispered back, the two quietly arguing with each other over whose fault it was that they wouldn't get to see the knife trick as they followed Maki and Kokichi back upstairs.

"Alright, I'm heading to my room for the night. No one bother me unless someone's trying to kill you," Maki instructed, giving everyone a wave as she walked off, saying over her head to Timothy, "Come on, you too! We have an early start tomorrow."

"Coming!" Timothy said, sticking his tongue out at Kaito before running off after his mentor, matching her steps as they headed to the staircase.

Kaito went to gently hug his husband as they left, incredibly proud of him as he whispered, "I think I've said this to you before, but you're real impressive, you know that?"

Kokichi snickered as they climbed the stairs, both at Maki's comment and at Kaito and Tim's soft bickering, still feeling that comfortable, friendly easiness. It'd be too much to hope for everyone being in good spirits for the whole trip, but he hoped they'd have a lot of moments like these.

"G'night, Maki-chan, night, Tim! See you guys tomorrow!" Kokichi waved to the other half of their little party--with his unstrained wrist, of course. If he was feeling alright, maybe he'd even sit in on training tomorrow. Then he'd be the one in Kaito's place, cheering him and Tim on while Maki drove them to their comfortable limits. He could get started on those letters he needed to write, too.

...if his wrist wasn't gonna be killing him.

Snorting a bit though Kokichi smiled at the hug, he raised an eyebrow. "Yeah? I'm reaaaaaal good at doing things of no consequence. You need some filler; I'm your guy." He didn't think he'd done anything impressive that evening, but it was still fun, and it felt nice to have Kaito fawn over him.

Pressing a quick kiss to Kaito's cheek before he straightened, Kokichi started to walk towards the main stairs of the castle as well. It was getting kinda late. "Today was fun, though. Despite the not-so-fun things that happened, but you gotta take the bad with the good sometimes."

Kaito didn't think risking the wrath of someone who, in a very real way, controlled your whole world was something 'of no consequence'. Kaito had personally spent a small portion of their time downstairs wondering what he was going to do when the king eventually found out what happened. Even if they weren't caught now, if Kokchi intended to keep up the knife throwing in the future, it was...kind of inevitable, right? That they'd have to deal with the consequences of all of this.

...ah well. That was a future problem. Either way, Kaito thought it was brave of his husband, even if Kokichi couldn't understand why.

Kaito dutifully followed Kokichi, keeping his pace slow to match Kokichi's walk as he said, "Yeah, it was! The last couple of days have been pretty active for us, though, it helps neither of us are on bedrest anymore. What's the number we gotta beat to be off bedrest longer than either one of us was on it? Nine days in a row?" he joked, shaking his head at them as he frowned, genuinely puzzled as he said,

"Oh, wait...twelve?"

He honestly wasn't sure. Oh well.

"Hey, want me to put some more oil on your wrist when we get back to the room?" Kaito asked, placing light fingers soothingly on the back of Kokichi's neck, rubbing at the muscle there as they headed upstairs.

Kokichi scoffed lightly. "I'll leave that to you, hun. I stopped trying to keep track of that a loooooong time ago. I just try to appreciate every day I can spend out of our room--and now I can appreciate every day I can leave the castle too!"

It was still just...insane. He could just leave. That trip the day before wasn't a one-off--they were planning on going to town tomorrow too! They were going to the coast! One day, when the climate was better, they were going to another country! It was...he could barely even describe it, but, fuck, Kokichi appreciated it. He didn't know how Kaito had changed Aiichi's mind when no argument Kokichi had ever used worked but...he was thankful. Kaito had given him so much...

And kept offering more.

Kokichi let out a pleased sigh at the fingers on his neck and gave Kaito a more relaxed than amused glance. "I mean, if you're offering. It's hard to turn down a massage from the master, you know? Kai-chan's really gonna turn me into a puddle for the third time today, huh."

"It'll be okay, though," he said, offering his husband an out. "Just shouldn't have written so much today when I was already hurting, you know? I'll be good with some rest, and maybe putting it under cold water for a bit. Kai-chan doesn't have to worry himself."

Kaito gave another soothing circle into Kokichi's neck as he mused, entirely honest, "It's not a big deal. I don't mind doing it… Oh! Maki told you to put ice on it. That might be a little better than cold water. You keep heading up, babe, I'll swing by the kitchen real quick and grab a bag and some ice. Won't take me more than a minute or two." Kaito gave a quick kiss to the top of Kokichi's head before trotting off, heading to the kitchen.

Kaito walked into the kitchen, heading straight to where he knew the freezer room was, slightly more familiar with the kitchen now because he, quite frankly, took every opportunity he could get to just walk around and act like he belonged there. Was it a somewhat childish, passive aggressive dig at all the kitchen staff for denying access to Kokichi for all these years?

Yes. Yes it was. And yes, he was somewhat ashamed of himself every time he thought about it for longer than a few seconds.

Again. He knew it wasn't any of their faults. Understood better than anyone that when the king says to do something, you do it, no questions asked. That was the way of things...and maybe that was why Kaito was so frustrated with everyone in this castle. Because, based on his conversations with Kokichi, they clearly didn't think blind obedience was a praise-worthy thing here. It wasn't the accepted, normal thing, and Kaito had been embarrassed over and over again, acting like it was. Leadership wasn't absolute here.

Which meant, for years and years, with all the freedoms given to them, the right to speak easily with the king, call him 'boss' or 'brother', to make demands of him, even the incredibly baffling idea that they could tell him when he was wrong and insist on some sort of change, literally whenever they wanted to...

...all that equaled to was that all these motherfuckers had abandoned Kokichi his entire fucking life.

And that idea, too, made Kaito's blood boil every time he thought about it for more than a few seconds.

Really!? NO ONE in this place, in the last twenty fucking years, had felt it was necessary to take the king aside and say "Hey, boss-man, brother of mine, I think you're low-key abusing your kid there'. Kokichi hadn't been officially allowed to leave the castle his entire life, and Kaito, who had been having only his literal first actual one on one conversation with the king and only knowing Kokichi not even a week by that point, had literally just asked if Kokichi could go cross-country and had gotten a yes.

...so...what!? No one could be bothered to fucking ASK on Kokichi's behalf to walk into town for the last twenty years!?

Kaito went into the freezer, grabbed an available paper bag, and filled it with ice, breaking some pieces from the chiseled blocks they kept in there with probably more force than was necessary, just...fuming again. Fuck god damn...

All these fucking Diceans were fucking selfish schemers is what it was. Taking advantage of the job security being Kokichi's unofficial wardens had offered, no doubt...fucking... "Augh!" Kaito shouted, taking a chisel and just stabbing the ice over and over again, letting some of the red bleed into his vision, ignoring the few glances some of the kitchen staff gave him as they checked to make sure everything was alright and the shouting Luminary lunatic hadn't hurt himself.

And once he had gotten that out of his system, and the red went away a little...Kaito frowned. Staring at the chisel at his hand in total, nervous confusion.

...why...was he so angry these days?

He wasn't like this.

Sure, he had a temper. Everyone in his family did. But...fucking just stabbing ice now? It was like...he had ants running through his blood for the last two days. Just feeling constantly tense since the party...or, maybe, really just since Byakuya's letter. Every time he wasn't actively correcting himself, breathing through the fury, he found it sneaking up on him again, making him just...emotional. Becoming absolutely furious with servants who were just following orders, the miserable selfish fucking-

Kaito closed his eyes. Took a deep breath. He had to calm down before he went back upstairs. Just breathe Kaito...everything was fine. You are having a good day. Kokichi is happy and safe. Your friends are happy and safe. Everything is fine.

Kaito stood in the freezer, letting the frigid temperature cool him...and genuinely felt better after a moment. Okay. He was good. He could face the world again.

Leaving the freezer, Kaito gave a sheepish grin to the kitchen staff, some who were, for the most part, looking at him with some exasperation. "Just grabbing some ice! Chiseled some more to replace what I took. Thanks!" Kaito said, showing them the bag and closing the freezer behind him.

Kaito quickly headed back upstairs, knocking on the door and saying quickly, "It's just me, 'Kichi," before coming in, closing the door behind him as he proudly announced, "I got ice!"

"Meet ya there!" Kokichi chirped after his husband, just feeling...grateful. For near damn everything. Sure, there was some freaky cult that popped up in Luminary, and the secretaries were surely still pieces of garbage, and there was strong anti-Luminary sentiment across the country...but, like, everything couldn't be perfect. And those things could be solved, some just requiring more time.

"Hey, Prince K?"

Kokichi blinked out of his thoughts, finding Lake almost hesitant to approach him on the second-floor landing. That was...weird. He stepped onto the landing and leaned against the banister, raising an eyebrow. "Lake-chan--what's up?"

The guard offered him a smile, dimmer than her usual. "Just wanted to check in, sorta. I mean, you're lookin' pleased as punch, and despite the rumors, I know Prince Kai's takin' care of you. Dude got real murderous in a drop of a hat when Den and I brought you in after that nosebleed--whatever his feelings on anyone else, he cares a whole lot about you."

"I'm good! I'm good." Kokichi felt his cheeks warm up, a mix of pride and concern in him. The rumors surrounding Kaito weren't...very kind or flattering, and even the truth that Lake had sussed out wasn't...the best. He sighed softly. "I was wondering why he was pissy towards you. Kai-chan doesn't like the restrictions around me, and it gets him riled up. I think being told straight out that you knocked me out, even for my own good, really bothered him."

Lake echoed his sigh, something pained in her expression. "Believe me, I don't like doin' it. I can understand that. But your old man makes some damn good points..."

Kokichi's expression darkened, though...he knew exactly what she meant. While his treatment was something plenty of people had objected to or tried to work around throughout the years, his father had always been able to convince them that his decision was for the best. Like the manipulative dick he was. Really, he had no idea how Kaito was able to come out of talks with Aiichi still holding his own opinions.

"But, I'm glad you're able to get out now. You seem happier."

"I am happier," Kokichi murmured almost shyly, his dark expression easing into something kind and...in love.

Something that Lake decided not to mention, though she did hold her arms out. "Can I hug my sorta nephew and be happy that someone has better schemes for getting him out of the castle than mine?"

Rolling his eyes, Kokichi pushed off the banister and gave the woman he'd known almost his whole life a hug. Kaito had reasons to be angry on his behalf, sure, but Kokichi knew that no one in the castle had bad intentions. They just owed his father, in some cases, their whole lives.

"I'll see you later, Lake."

"Later, kid. Goodnight."

Kokichi had just begun to take his sweater off when Kaito returned to their room, and he turned with a smile. "I hope you're ready for me to be a heat thief again tonight."

Kaito shrugged, rolling his eyes as he said, "Like I have a choice? You're lucky I have plenty to spare, 'Kichi; considering your little icicle fingers, I don't know how you got by all this time without your own personal six foot heater."

Kaito handed his husband the bag of ice before going to the nightstand to open up the massage oil, only taking a little of it between his fingers. "When you feel the ache ease under the ice, let me know, and I'll rub this stuff on. That sounds like the right order to me, right? I mean, it'd hurt if I tried to rub into the muscle first, right?" Kaito said, honestly asking. He wasn't a doctor, just...trying to use his own history of handling injuries to do his best to guess what Kokichi might need from him. Sure, what Kokichi had going on wasn't the kind of injury Kaito was used to treating, but, well...easing pain was the same any kind of injury it was, right? Numb then treat?

Ah well. Hopefully that was right.

Once they had gotten it settled out, Kaito took Kokichi's strained wrist and, carefully, rubbed the oil up and down the chilled arm, remembering that little pained gasp down in the basement and doing his best not to upset the part of Kokichi that had hurt him.

As he worked, he said idly, "Maki's probably gonna end up knocking on our door again tomorrow morning. You don't have to wake up when I do. You can feel free to go back to sleep when she does, I mean, we'll get you up before we head out into town."

"Being very cold," Kokichi said sagely. "We'd put heat packs under my covers to warm them up before bed, and sometimes I'd just grab a thick quilt and sleep in front of my fireplace. We had to special order, like, the most heavy-duty grate ever so I wouldn't set my room on fire."

"I like Kai-chan the best out of every heater though." He gave his husband a wink as he took the bag of ice, gently holding it against his wrist. Thinking about that kiss in the basement, Kokichi grinned flirtatiously. "He can warm me up both inside and outside at the same time. It's quite a skill you know."

Once the ice was no longer needed, Kokichi tipped the bag over into his sink then cuddled up to Kaito's side on their bed, sighing happily at the warm hand rubbing his arm and wrist. Just to show his appreciation, Kokichi started to rub Kaito's--frankly impressive even not compared to his own--bicep with his free hand.

"Mmm," he hummed, nuzzling his husband. "I might get up and watch you guys train depending on how I'm feeling. Just don't wait up for me, 'kay? Might try to get some work done down there too."

"Does Shuu-chan usually join you guys? If I get up a little later and he doesn't, I can check on him--see if he needs any more water or painkillers or whatever. Or maybe he'll be fine and we can just walk down together."

Kaito felt the top of his ears go red at Kokichi's words, though he just rolled his eyes and chuckled at him, determined not to let his head go there if he could help it. Since when had Kokichi become such a tease? God, it was hot...and also, just, soooo not fair. Self control, Momota. Just don't think about Kokichi's teasing little jokes, and his wandering hands and, and his body coming close to press against him and...

Kaito cleared his throat, happy to focus on the new conversation as he said, only stumbling over his words a little, "S-sometimes! I mean, he used to a lot back in high school, ‘cause me and Maki would basically drag him along every time we went, but, well, uni hit and all of that became kind of impossible. He'll still come hang out at our training sessions a lot, but he rarely joins in anymore..."

Kaito frowned, as this conversation brought up a point... "Hey, I don't know what's been up with him...maybe it's just the stress of the big move or something? But man...Shuuichi has not been acting like himself for a good while now. I really don't know what to make of it. Like, going off to get drunk by himself with a bunch of strangers, at least strangers to him, is...really unlike him. You couldn't have gotten me to guess in a million years that was where he was if you had asked me at lunch."

Feeling the muscles start to relax in Kokichi's arm, Kaito continued on. "Maybe he's just stressed. Ya know what I should do? Take him out on, like... a bro-date. Just me and him, off being dudes, hanging out. And, like, maybe he'll open up about whatever’s going on with him, ya know?"

Kokichi snickered quietly as he watched Kaito's ears turn red and just nuzzled him more. Once he was feeling better and Kaito wouldn't fuss over him, maybe he'd suck his husband off to return the favor from before. Just get Kaito feeling good and letting Kokichi thank him for everything he did. No way Kaito would let him right now though...

Sighing softly, his mood sobering, Kokichi nodded as his guesses were confirmed. "I wasn't sure since I still don't know you guys all that well, but...I mean, if he is acting weird, then even I can see it. And I wouldn't blame him. On top of the move, everything that happened between Maki-chan's shitty mission and you getting hurt has been super weird and upsetting to, well, everyone, and even worse for you guys. Maybe this is just how Shuu-chan is trying to cope?"

"A "bro-date" sounds like a great idea, though," he smiled, nuzzling Kaito again. "You guys haven't really been able to just hang out together lately, right? I guess going into town yesterday was, but that was all four of us and, yanno, in town. Which is new to you all." And with pockets of hatred. It'd be hard to relax and open up in a place where you had to be careful to watch your back. "If you need any help setting something up, I'll do my best, sweets."

Kaito frowned, brow furrowing as he lifted up Kokichi's hand, kissing him on his fist, a silent indication that he was done with the massage, Kokichi seeming to be alright now. Still, Kokichi was right...it probably had more to do with Maki's mission than it did the move. Obviously. It had been...traumatizing, all that stuff.

...Kaito just...had a hard time thinking about all of that stuff. In a very literal way, he was blocking out any thought even kind of related to Maki's mission to kill Shuuichi, his two friends off who knew where, while Kaito sat at the castle, entirely worthless...Maki's frightening, urgent explanation to Kaito that she had chosen to torture Shuuichi to prolong his life...

She hadn't gotten the chance to do it. Shuuichi was okay now. His shoulder wound never even seemed to so much as slow him down, even those first few days...

But fuck if Kokichi hadn't sent the guard after his friends, would he have even known what had happened to them? Shuuichi tortured, dead and disposed of, Maki undoubtedly going the same way soon after, once her mind was hers again.

Kaito didn't want to think about it. He could feel horror start creeping into his chest, whenever thoughts of that potential future got too close to the surface of his mind. Kaito would have...he would have probably gone insane, if any of that had happened. He couldn't even guess what he would have done. But it would have been irrational, no doubt.

...and if Kaito was struggling to just think about it, Shuuichi, who had faced that future on the other side of Maki's blade...

...yeah. Kaito needed to talk to him. Make sure his best friend was good.

To Kokichi, he just said, "I doubt we'll need much setup. Knowing us, we'll wander aimlessly and end up in a pub and just talk at each other for a while. Maybe I'll find somewhere with a pool table and he can relax by absolutely destroying me for a while. I'll ask him if he wants to do something like that tomorrow afternoon."

Kaito stretched his shoulder, wiping the last of the oil off on his own neck as he laid back, beat. What a long day. "But, hey! Almost forgot the real cool part of Shuuichi's weirdness today. Guess we made a good impression on Aba, Tom, and Itch, huh? They wanna hang out with us again. That's kinda cool."

For that long, quiet moment, Kokichi just leaned his head against Kaito's shoulder and squeezed his hand gently. There was just...so much that had happened that was cruel and unfair and just...awful in ways he couldn't even describe. He was happy now, of course, but emotions didn't erase each other. They just stacked. Hopefully with some quality time together, with things at least immediately around them being peaceful...they all could start to heal.

Laughing softly, Kokichi gave Kaito another nuzzle before he flopped backward, Kokichi scooting back on the bed soon after. "I was kinda nervous they only wanted to talk with us because we're princes, but...if they keep wanting to hang out, I think they just enjoy it, huh? I didn't talk much with Itch and Tom, not after Itch went to put away his keg, but Aba-chan is a fun dancer. They're all pretty fun."

It wasn't the purpose of tomorrow's trip, but if they saw the trio in town they could at least say hi. Maybe plan to meet up again sometime soon. Even if Kaito and Shuuichi decided to hang around town on their bro-date, Kokichi would probably head back with Maki and Tim. Finish up work if he didn't that morning, maybe try to do some more if more letters came in. He'd been working a lot less lately, despite his binge while Kaito was on bedrest, and he was eager to get back into it. But while still having time to have fun.

Scooching himself under the covers, Kokichi nosed against Kaito's arm, placing a gentle kiss there. "I'm glad Shuu-chan was able to make friends with them too. I know it's not the easiest thing, but it makes me happy to see you guys talking to people other than me."

"Well, it had to happen eventually. As much fun as it's been, somehow I think just following on your heels all day every day is going to eventually grate on ya. Gotta find some people to give you a break from me when Shuuichi and Maki are off doing...I don't know." Kaito shrugged, "Whatever it is those two decide they wanna do. I don't know."

Feeling his eyes going heavy as the two relaxed in this position, feeling the day sort of settle into his bones. He needed some sleep...though, he had to remember that he had his own, actually super important letters to write as well. The king had said Kaito should reach out to someone to protect his friends, and so Kaito was going to send his brother and Fuyuhiko both letters asking them to look in on them, if they could.

He thought briefly about asking his father for help as well...before deciding that was probably a dead end route by itself.

It was a busy thing, to be king. Princess-Consort too, really. Neither of them had had a lot of time for either of their children, and Kaito and Byakuya had just sort of accepted it at some point, that if they really needed something, it was better to go to...anyone else, first, before their parents.

Oh well. Probably better to have parents that didn't see you at all than what King Aiichi did to Kokichi, honestly. At least Kaito had been free to do things without them ordering him around.

So yeah. Letter to his brother and his powerful friend. Maybe a letter to Kaede? He had to respond to her anyway...

Tomorrow. He'd find time tomorrow. Maybe he'd wake up even earlier and get it done before training.

But yeah. All of that tomorrow.

Kokichi hummed lazily, knowing that it was too naive to say something like he didn't think he'd get tired of being around Kaito constantly. He liked hanging out with his husband, but people needed time apart just to be alone. Or even to be with someone else one on one. Thankfully Kaito, Maki, Shuuichi, and Tim, to a point, had each other, so they wouldn't be alone, but... Kokichi still hoped they could get along with others too.

And there was time. There was so much going on that needed time, but thankfully they had it, so he just needed to slow down. Stop worrying and trying to rush things in a way that would doubtlessly turn for the worse than if he'd just left them alone.

...maybe he really should chill out more. Out of everything people said about him, maybe they had a point with that part. That seemed to be another way Kaito complemented him--it was easier to relax with the older prince around.

Enough that Kokichi didn't have much trouble drifting off to sleep soon after Kaito stopped talking, comforted by his big, warm, cuddlable husband.

In a rare event, Kokichi began to dream that night.

He changed his mind back. This was paradise. It was some sort of wild field, but everything was made of candy, from chocolate bark trees bearing heavy syrup-filled fruits to the dirt that tasted like crumbled up cookies. Which Kokichi knew because he'd tried them. He'd climbed up on a chocolate tree and sat in its surprisingly sturdy limbs, breaking off little bits to pop in his mouth, the chocolate melting almost as soon as it hit his tongue despite remaining solid in his hands.

He could hear people playing happily in the distance though he couldn't see them, but that was alright. He was plenty occupied eating his fill of nature's miraculous bounty. He looked out at sugar-dusted mountains in the distance, to a soda river, pink clouds hanging low in the sky... Low enough to touch, actually.

Climbing higher in the tree, Kokichi reached up and giggled at the soft, almost cottony texture of the cloud he'd touched, taking a pinch and humming happily at the spun sugar that tasted like strawberries? Maybe it'd go well with the syrup fruit! Gently plucking a ripe, liquid-y container, Kokichi tipped the fruit into his mouth, suckling at the stem hole and gulping down the sweet goo...

In reality, Kokichi had been drooling a bit before he latched onto whatever was in front of him, sucking at it with soft, happy sighs.

In a rare event, at least since he had arrived in Dicea, Kaito wasn't having a dream.

He had managed to brush his teeth and kick off his clothes before crawling back under the covers with Kokichi, and almost as soon as his head had touched the pillow he had been out, also an extremely rare thing for him. Crying earlier that day had probably taken more out of him than he had realized, and he had been enjoying the deep sleep, in the sense that, when he was suddenly roused from it, he almost immediately wanted to go back to it.

Kaito was lying on his side, the cast part of his arm safely pressed up around his stomach, Kaito having long realized that so long as he kept that part of his arm away from any pressure, the rest of his arm was fine to be slept on. Which was nice, because it meant he could wrap his good arm around Kokichi, keeping him close and comfortably draping his arm around Kokichi's waist and keeping his hand on his back. It was their usual sleeping position these days, the best way for Kokichi to keep warm and Kaito enjoying the softness of his husband pressed against him.

Sometimes one of them would get restless in their sleep (usually Kaito, honestly, especially with all the dreaming he had been doing lately) and they'd end up weirdly tangled or on opposite ends of the bed by the time they woke up, but it was still dark when Kaito was roused, and they were both still in the positions they fell asleep in.

This was all summarized and presented in an effort to explain some of the...weirdness that was about to occur.

Kaito was roused from a deep, dreamless sleep, and like usual, wasn't quite...awake-awake, in the first few moments. His arm was around Kokichi, as normal, and because they had left the curtain open, Kaito found himself staring at the moon in the distance, just...feeling vaguely confused. He had no idea why he was confused. He had just woken up with this sort of vague sense of...'what-the-fuckery', if you would. But he couldn't pin down what had made him feel like that in the first place.

...

And then, after a beat, his still half-asleep brain provided more context: Why the fuck are you so god damned hard?

Kaito...didn't...know...b-but f-f-fuck...fuck he was hard. Like, rock hard. H-had he been having some sort of wet dream and forgotten it o-or...??

Kaito shifted awkwardly, ever so slightly... and it was only in this simple movement did Kaito realize something was firmly attached to one of his nipples.

Once he felt it, it was baffling how Kaito hadn't realized what was happening immediately, even in the sleep soaked confusion of just wakefulness. Kaito's whole body shivered as the space around his nipple suddenly ached, sore not just from attention, but, like...attention that had clearly been happening for a while now. And was still, at this moment, happening...

What the fuck!?

Kaito moved the covers a little, revealing his...still fucking sleeping?? husband just, like, trying to devour one of his nipples, a thick coat of drool lining Kaito's chest that suggested he had been at it for a bit now, and not even just the nipple area. There were...had...had Kokichi managed to give his chest two fucking hickeys while they were BOTH ASLEEP!??

Fucking HOW!?!?

Oh fuck he was hard!

Kaito put his hand over his eyes and quietly, miserably groaned to himself. Fuck. Fuck. What was...shit he had to do something, or he was going to...Atua strike him down, it was like there was a fucking rock poking through the hole in his boxers...thank god he even wore that kind of underwear tonight. His briefs would have felt like they were strangling him...

Okay. Breathe, Kaito. Deal with the weird nipple leech first.

Carefully, trying not to wake him, Kaito pushed Kokichi off of himself...and then tried again, his freaky night leech surprisingly strong in his sleep. But he got him on the second try (shit, now his nipple was wet and cold and sore without Kokichi's mouth wrapped around it), gently pushing his small husband onto his back, with this this...small little smirk on his face and...these happy little noises from from him...just lying there in the moonlight...

Kaito stared at him. Practically panting, his whole body needing and wanting. The prince swallowed hard, the thought, both cruel and enticing flickering suddenly, then repeatedly, through his brain:

He could...just take him.

He could just turn him over now, push down his underwear, and push in now. Or take Kokichi's legs and pin them over his head, his ass bare and waiting, no prep, no gentleness, not even waiting for Kokichi to be awake and aware. Just Kaito taking what he wanted. Just...wanted so badly...

The fantasy, the need, was so strong that Kaito actually started to reach out to grab Kokichi...and then bit his lip. Hard.

We do NOT...spring dry, bareback sex on our small, fragile HUSBAND...in his FUCKING SLEEP.

Especially not after a full day of his body giving out on him.

...Even if the little bastard STARTED IT.

Kaito gripped his hand onto a fist and shoved it into his eye, breathing heavily. Okay. Okay, okay, okay. He'd...fuck, he'd Teruteru this shit...just...go into the bathroom real quick and rub one out. It'd be fine.

Fuck.

...god, he couldn't stop looking at him. It wasn't fair. Why was a person allowed to look this cute!?

...maybe he could...just rub it out here?

He'd be quiet. He'd be so god damned quiet. It wouldn't be weird. He wouldn't try to fuck his husband in his sleep. Just...rub it out real quick.

...Kokichi was still...suckling something in his sleep? Kaito could see his lips moving, every now and again.

...what if Kaito...

...No, NO! EVEN WEIRDER IDEA! WE DO NOT MOLEST OUR TINY HUSBAND'S TINY MOUTH IN HIS SLEEP!

Kaito shoved his face into his pillow and whisper-shouted a number of curse words at himself.

In his dream, Kokichi blinked his eyes open in confusion, that sweet, thick nectar no longer in front of him. What? Where...

"You're so greedy!"

Kokichi looked down, pouting at his husband grinning wolfishly up at him from the ground, tossing the deflated fruit between his hands. "I can't even believe you drank this whole thing--I bet your stomach's just an overripe one of these...whatever these are, huh?"

"Nu-uh!" he shot back so eloquently, climbing out of the tree to meet Kaito. "It's not that much once you eat it. And look at how much is around us? It'd be wasteful not to eat."

Kaito looked at him for a moment before chuckling and looking around. "Alright, alright. You're not totally a glutton for sweets, sure. Hold on, 'Kichi, I found something I think you'd really like!"

Sitting down at the base of the tree, Kaito patted his lap, Kokichi eagerly joining his husband and looking at him expectantly for his surprise. And, from some hidden space in his cape, Kaito produced a long, thick eclair, the cream practically dripping out of it.

"I made this for you, babe. Would you try it?"

Of fucking course he would.

Another pool of drool left Kokichi's mouth in the waking world, his mouth falling open a little wider. He even shuffled a little in his sleep, getting closer to Kaito and rubbing against him.

Kaito was in the middle of calling himself quite a few unpleasant things, just very sternly, very quietly scolding himself for being a bad husband who would even dare thin-

His whole fucking body shivered in surprise when Kaito suddenly felt Kokichi against him again, his arms curling around Kaito's bicep, and his mouth, now open and wide, pressed against his arm, just...gently chewing??? Against his skin???

Why the actual fuck was Kokichi trying to eat him in his sleep??

Fuck, fuck, fuck, this wasn't...this wasn't fair, Kaito just...fuck he just needed to get out of here, just, go sleep in the tub or something, just...

Kokichi's tongue darted out of his mouth, pressing itself against his skin. Licking him.

Kaito stared at Kokichi with wide, lust-filled eyes...just...stupid and impulsive and desperate in his need...suddenly, just, rationalizing to himself. Would...would it even work? No, no, no, of course it wouldn't, Kokichi would wake up, he'd be horrified. The guy already had so many fucking sexual hangups, Kaito didn't want to add 'worrying his husband will molest him in his sleep' to the laundry list. He didn't want to...he didn't want to hurt Kokichi...

...fffuuuuck he wanted to fuck him though.

...K-Kokichi...seemed really asleep right now. A-and...Kaito was so hard already, that maybe...i-if Kokichi didn't know anything had happened, it technically couldn't accidentally traumatize him, r-right?

He'd be...he'd be super careful. And if Kokichi looked like he was waking up, he'd stop. And if Kokichi woke up and caught him, he'd...he'd be so, soooo sorry...h-he'd promise to never do it again.

But...but just for now...just a little bit?

Feeling guilty and excited and starving, Kaito, pulling his arm away from Kokichi's hold, quietly, carefully, shuffled himself onto his knees, his heart pounding in his chest at his incredibly stupid and selfish idea, staring wide eyed at Kokichi as Kaito reached down into his underwear, pulling his dick through the open seam of his boxers, his whole body alight with anticipation as he gave himself a few small pumps, enjoying the tension in his own grip. This was such a stupid, stupid, stupid idea...

Gently, just entirely aware Kokichi could wake up any second, furious with him, Kaito put his arm around Kokichi's neck and, holding his head, gently shifted Kokichi's upper body onto Kaito's lap, pausing once his upper half was lying comfortably in his lap, waiting to see if the movement roused him. He could still make up something by this point.

Ha ha, what? What did you mean, he was guiding Kokichi's face to his dick!? Noooo, Kaito was just...uh...trying to squash a spider he saw on Kokichi's face??

With his dick???

Fuck this was a terrible idea.

But Kaito was too invested in it now, and (in a weird way, almost as turned on by his guilt as he was the situation), he guided Kokichi's mouth to the tip of his dick, eyes widening when Kokichi's mouth closed on the tip...

"mmmmmm..."

Kokichi's cheeks tinted at the almost lewd moan that came from him as he relaxed his jaw enough to fit his mouth around the eclair, lapping at the cream already dripping out and giving it a soft suck, just to make sure it wouldn't explode everywhere. It was delicious, one of the best things he'd ever put in his mouth. He could hear Kaito laughing affectionately, but, fuck, Kokichi was way too focused on the eclair, the taste almost rapturous.

He continued to moan as he sucked on the pastry, licking at the cream and chocolate glaze, the delicate, loose pastry...

Kokichi wasn't surprised when he felt hot breath on his neck, followed by rough kisses and a hand sneaking down his body and between his legs. He'd never thought food could make him horny, but with how everything tasted, with the eclair so delicious in particular...it was making all of his body happy. And when his body was happy, Kaito seemed to be happy.

Taking a bit more of the eclair, swallowing down the first bite though he didn't have to chew or anything, Kokichi spread his legs, letting Kaito touch wherever he wanted. Wherever Kokichi wanted, really. The only thing better than the slurry of sugar in his belly would be a cock in his ass.

Atua was going to add a whole god damn level to his fucking trials for this shit.

At least...that's what Kaito would be thinking, i-if his brain was...firing on any cylinder by this point. If literally all the blood he needed to make a rational choice by this point wasn't being pumped in the opposite direction, Kokichi...

oooooooooh-it wasn't gonna be enough

That was what Kaito realized almost immediately, his eye twitching as he quietly panted, his attempts to swallow through the drool piling into the back of his mouth failing, Kaito feeling his spit start to overflow at the corner of his mouth, quickly wiping it with the back of his hand, face a hot burn of red as he stared, his eyes wildly, dangerously, beaming down at Kokichi.

As Kokichi sucked and lapped his tongue against Kaito's head, his mouth closing around it a few times to try to swallow whatever Kokichi thought he was eating, all of this so good, Kokichi being so good, and none of it being enough...Kaito's rationalizations started going...to a dark place.

As he kept his good hand on the back of Kokichi's head, gently leading his dick slightly more onto Kokichi's tongue, he thought to himself...Kokichi was so good. So good and observant and obedient. Just the perfect little body, ready and able and eager to give whatever Kaito wanted...d-demanded...of him...

Because...Kokichi was his, right?

C-certainly...a sleeping, helpless Kokichi was....also Kaito's?

This was a dark train of thought for the Luminary Prince, who often enjoyed the act of pleasuring his partners almost more than he enjoyed getting off himself. It wasn't his nature, to demand something that Kaito didn't feel certain wasn't already being offered. A-and, sure, Kokichi was...c-clearly having some sort of wet dream right now, if the way his legs suddenly shifted and spread, the little noises coming from him, were any indication...but that didn't mean Kokichi had actually offered Kaito anything right now. That was how Kaito usually thought, and when the haze of lust went away, probably how he'd feel later.

...but right now?

Kokichi was his, right??

His to have and...indulge in...to press and push and take and deny whenever...whenever Kaito felt like it. To bite and mark and fuck-

Kaito's brain...kind of shorted-out there.

But that was fine.

The Conqueror was there to take up the slack.

The Luminary Prince felt a curious sort of calm come over him, his gaze openly predatory as he casually entangled Kokichi's hair between his fingers, making a tangle of them...before pulled Kokichi's head in and down on his cock, pushing his head past the back of his tongue, into the top of his throat...then farther in...listening as Kokichi's breathing started to constrict.

Just...holding it there.

...and as he heard Kokichi choke, Kaito snapped out of it, horror suddenly filling his chest as he, quickly, pulled his dick back, just, fuck, fuck, what had he been about to do, that was...that was not okay...fuck what had he been thinking...

Quickly, as Kokichi's breathing evened out, Kaito untangled his fingers from his hair, as he shifted himself away from Kokichi a little, digging his palm into his eye, just...nope, nope, no, bad idea, evil idea, what had he been thinking...

It was a jarring thing, to be enjoying an unearthly scrumptious pastry and suddenly not be able to breathe, to feel wet and sweaty and scared and aroused and--

Kokichi rolled onto his side, hacking deep coughs that shook his frame, spit being thrown from his mouth in thick globs. Wh-what?! What was--?

Honestly, his first idea was that he'd stopped breathing in his sleep again, though that didn't tend to happen without him being sick first. But, as Kokichi coughed and gasped for breath, he...well, tasted something that definitely wasn't an eclair. It was something that was slowly becoming familiar--the taste of Kaito's sex.

Blearily, Kokichi tried to push himself up, looking around for his husband, rasping out something that...might've resembled Kaito's name.

Kaito was...face-fucking him while he was asleep? That was... Kokichi didn't know what to think, brain too frazzled but...he was really turned on and kind of scared and those feelings just made him want his husband to be close.

Okay, so, here's the thing, there was this, like, GIANT spider and-

Kaito swallowed hard, Kokichi turned a little away from him, clearly disoriented and confused and his voice, oh no!

Just a whirlwind, right now, of being literally painfully turned on and oh so fucking guilty, Kaito heard his name rasp out between his husbands lips, Kokichi sounding frightened, calling out to him, and Kaito felt every protective instinct alight, which was, ya know...extremely confusing, considering he was technically the source of the danger right now. But-

Heart still pounding his chest, Kaito reached out quickly, aggressively, circling his arm around Kokichi's chest as the Dicean Prince tried to push himself away from the mattress, disrupting the movement as Kaito pulled Kokichi back into Kaito's chest. Entirely on accident, Kokichi's legs caught between Kaito's, one of Kaito's ankles landing against the back of Kokichi's lower leg, pinning it there, Kaito just desperately, desperately trying to be close to Kokichi as he whispered in his ear, holding him tight.

Kaito's body became a shield around Kokichi's, pinned beneath him...or a cage, really...depending on how you looked at it.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I lost control, I love you, I didn't mean to, I'm sorry," Kaito whispered, his chest heaving against Kokichi's back, his member, still thick and high and aching, rubbing against Kokichi's ass at every small twitch and breath as Kaito whispered, urgently, "I love you, I love you, I'm sorry, are you okay?"

Kokichi coughed a little more and swallowed roughly, shivering under Kaito, both in fear and arousal. Which...was an uncomfortable combination so...address the fear first.

"...i-if you want something...wake me up..."

Honestly, Kokichi would've been happy to blow Kaito, maybe after a few moments to wake up properly. But waking up choking was just...too familiar and terrifying for him to handle. Kaito had been so scared when he stopped breathing their first time and it was a very real possibility that that could've happened again.

Shivering again, Kokichi pressed the side of his face against Kaito's shoulder, voice still wavering. "Just...just don't do that again... I love you...so don't..."

Another shudder and he pressed his hips down against Kaito's slick, prepped cock, his own starting to bulge the front of his sleep-shorts. "...fuck me slow, please..."

Kaito wanted to ask Kokichi if he was sure, if he was okay. Wanted to apologize and promise never again, he promised...

B-but he was so hungry.

Kaito stared down at Kokichi, eyes hazy with lust and possessive, controlling need, as Kaito kissed into the back of Kokichi's neck, gently but firmly pressing Kokichi's shoulders down, lowering him that his head and chest were pressing into the mattress, while his knees stayed up, trapped against Kaito's overlapping ankles, his ass raised and waiting for Kaito.

As Kaito pushed him down, he whispered into his neck between kisses. "I will, I'm sorry, thank you, I love you, I love you," Kaito assured, carefully holding his unslung cast against himself, moving his good arm from Kokichi's chest down to his front, down to his shorts, past his waistband and his underwear, putting his hand around Kokichi's dick and massaging it, pumping at it, kissing into Kokichi's neck as he moved that small muscle at the head of Kokichi's dick around his palm, just trying to get him wet, to get the lubrication as he said, "I'm sorry, I love you, don't move."

Kaito moved himself away from his neck, trusting him to stay in position, kissing his shoulder, and his back, through the cloth of Kokichi's shirt, before getting to skin again, where Kokichi's shirt was riding up, Kaito kissing at Kokichi's back, the spot beside his spine, before taking his tongue out, licking up his spine, pushing the rest of the shirt up with his face as he licked up his back, his hand still working Kokichi's dick as Kaito kissed those spots again, able to taste Kokichi's skin, sucking and nipping at the skin, leaving red marks. Leaving bruises. Leaving his marks against Kokichi's back.

Like every time before, Kokichi went down easily, crossing his arms in front of him to rest against as he displayed himself. He just...needed Kaito to take him. Erase the moments of fear and uncertainty with the love and passion his husband brought at every occasion. He wanted to feel Kaito properly, awake and consenting, make it good for both of them.

Kokichi let out little whimpers as Kaito kissed him and started to work his dick, starting to feel better as dreams faded away. "I love my Kai-chan...never want anyone but him to touch me...uung...like that... I wanna...be a good husband for him so...you don't have to take anything by force... I'll give it if you give me the chance..."

With Kaito focusing so heavily on his cock and licking and nipping, well, he broke the rules a little. Whimpers gave way to panting and moans and Kokichi couldn't help trying to spread his legs more, but that was okay in the 'don't move' rule set, right? Like, Kaito wouldn't be mad at how he was steadily thickening in his hand, so anything that made it easier for him to fuck was fine!

It was...so sweet how Kaito was taking care of him, taking the time to mark Kokichi like this wasn't something so sudden, even when he'd offered himself up. ...it was a sleepy lapse of judgment. Kaito wasn't dissatisfied with Kokichi in bed, didn't need to take matters into his own hands. He didn't mean to...

"A-ah..." Kokichi's thighs quivered on their own this time, his cock twitching in Kaito's grasp and starting to drip pre-cum. He did want to put their lesson to good use, but...this was a special circumstance. This wasn't about his own release, and Kokichi didn't think he'd mind feeling Kaito pound him even after he came.

There it was. Kaito grinned into Kokichi's back, taking a piece of his skin in between his teeth and biting down as he felt Kokichi's dick wet against Kaito's hands, Kaito slowing down as he ran his fingers over the tip, spreading and collecting. That would work. That would be enough.

Slow though, he had to go slow. Kokichi had asked him to go slow. Kaito had woken him up in one of the scariest ways possible, the least he could do was follow the only request his husband had made of him.

Most of Kokichi's words shot lines of pleasure through Kaito, hopelessly turned on by his submissiveness, his eagerness...but...the 'by force' comments...fuck. Later, when his head was clear and his groin was empty, Kaito was going to think seriously about what he had done and know that he had to make serious amends for frightening Kokichi so badly. Apologize for using him without consent or even warning, something that, no matter what, was never going to be Kaito's right to do, no matter how they talked during sex.

...but for now...

Lust and need rolled through Kaito like a sickness. His stomach flipped and turned again, filled with electricity that shot through his chest, arms and cock. It was painful, how full of lust he was. He could stop if Kokichi needed him to, of course he could...but he prayed that his husband would never test that. At the very least not right now, while Kaito felt half crazed by his need for him.

Kaito took a deep breath (it was nowhere near enough, fuck), kissing the spot he had bit and then straightening up, looking down at Kokichi, posed and perfect and so god damn fuckable, Kokichi looking up at him with those wide, anticipating eyes, his legs parting, eager to let Kaito in...

Fuck. He was perfect. Could anyone blame Kaito for almost completely losing it every time he wanted Kokichi?

(Yes, you dick, getting horny doesn't fucking mean you get to rape your husband you piece of shit, and Kaito was going to beat that into his own fucking head the second he was clear again this couldn't happen again this couldn't happen again.)

Reaching down to touch himself, to add his own wetness to the pre-cum that he had collected from Kokichi, the two fluids sticking and spreading across Kaito's fingers, Kaito, unable to hold back, to be kind, put two of his fingers together right off the bat, trying to go slow but needing to hurry as he slicked them against Kokichi's hole, before pushing both in, brow furrowed and mouth open, his throat swallowing hard as he felt Kokichi's walls push against him, already twitching and pulling around his touch. As Kaito pulled and pushed his fingers in and out of Kokichi, loosening him, playing with him.

"Your body is so perfect for me, 'Kichi," Kaito said, grinning wolfishly down at him, moving his fingers in circles at his insides, enjoying the teasing tugging at his skin, "Look at that. It's always so quick to pull me in. It's like every piece of you was designed just for me. Perfect. You're so beautiful..."

Kaito sat further back on his knees, pressing against Kokichi's legs some more as he kneeled down to kiss the top of Kokichi's backside, before taking that skin as well between his teeth, biting down as he moved his fingers inside of him, his aim practiced as he sought out the spot that he knew would do so much more than tease.

"Mmph!" Kokichi squeaked at the particularly rough bite, keeping his hips in place even as Kaito played with his wettening tip, just making his chubby cock leak more. Kaito had already been rock hard, and still here he was, trying to get Kokichi to cum first. It was unfair and cute and sweet and frustrating and, fuck. God it felt good.

And it felt even better once Kaito finally penetrated him, even if it was with fingers--still ever so considerate. More sounds, more drawn out than the ones that came before, fell from Kokichi's mouth and he pressed back into Kaito's fingers, flushing and groaning at the teasing compliments. "K-Kai-chan feels perfect in me, I-I told you. I'm always t-too, ah, tight for you right away, but even this feels...ooh, perfect."

So why wouldn't his body want to invite his husband in? Even if it was a little embarrassing how his hole swallowed up everything Kaito put in it, wanting fingers and his cock alike to stay and keep his rings stretched open.

Kokichi couldn't vocalize any of that, though, because all that came out of his mouth was a low warble as Kaito bit down on his ass and hit his sweet spot, his thighs shaking violently and his cock bobbing and dripping. And, fuck, he clamped down hard on Kaito's fingers, for once not feeling satisfied with them and wishing that it was his husband's length inside him so that Kokichi could squeeze and milk it for all his husband had to spill inside him.

His dream was turning into a hazy memory, but Kokichi knew that he'd much rather be filled with Kaito's cum than sugar syrup.

"Kai-chaaaan," he whined, still pushing into Kaito's fingers. "I w-wanted you to f-fuck me slow once you were inside me--so get inside already!"

Kaito growled, closing his eyes and telling himself to be patient, to not rush this. He had only just started widening him, if he lost his patience...don't hurt him. Even if he was literally begging for it. Kokichi didn't understand what he was asking for, having never been entered without some level of prep before...

"Kokichi," Kaito growled, moving his hand quicker around him, pushing and pulling and stretching, feeling the walls give little by little as Kokichi trembled against him. "You don't get it...think about what you're saying...if it's tight even after prep, think about what it would be like without it...I'm huge inside of you. It wouldn't feel good for you. You want to be able to walk tomorrow, right?"

What Kaito didn't say was explaining what it actually felt like for someone to do that to you; the sheer agony of being torn and ripped apart on the inside while the fucker who couldn't be bothered got what they wanted out of you.

Kaito didn't want to touch him like that. Didn't want anyone to ever touch Kokichi like that, even if something were to happen someday and Kokichi moved on from him to someone new. Didn't want Kokichi's happy mewls and squeals through sex to become pained whines and helpless requests to slow down...

Kaito didn't want to teach him through a practical demonstration. Didn't want to ever touch Kokichi like that. But if he could just get it into his head that there were certain things he should never tempt Kaito to do...

Kaito pulled out his fingers, wiping them alongside Kokichi's backside, wanting them halfway clean for the next part of Kokichi he planned to touch, Kaito taking his dick, still painfully throbbing and hard and fuck it was so hard to be gentle, but gently, carefully, placing it into Kokichi's backside, pushing testingly to see if enough space had been opened without tearing, and feeling enough give against him, pushing in. Kaito felt his whole body go warm at the pressure around him, the sheer sense of relief as he finally started to get what he had wanted so badly, pushing against the small amount of resistance Kokichi's body gave him before it started to suck him in.

"Th-there we go..." Kaito sighed happily, just enjoying the feeling for a moment...before he turned heated eyes on Kokichi.

He reached down (it was sometimes amazing to Kaito how little he had to maneuver to get to any part of Kokichi's body. He was so small against him), pushing his hand through the space between Kokichi and the mattress, curling his fingers and palm securely around Kokichi's neck...and then lifted him up, pulling Kokichi up by the grip into Kaito's chest. As he maneuvered Kokichi, his dick pushed in more inside of him, Kaito not giving Kokichi any room as he slid in deeper, his legs still pinned beneath Kaito and his upper body unable to pull against Kaito's grip around Kokichi's neck, the only part of his body that had any freedom of movement now his arms.

Kaito could feel Kokichi's pulse beating rapidly against his fingers, his breathing in and out against Kaito's palm, and ever so lightly, Kaito squeezed as he moved his hips against him, slowly, testingly, as he said urgently into the top of Kokichi's head, "You can't tempt me like that, okay...you don't know what you do to me...it's so hard to keep myself under control with you..." The truth in that statement was more and more evident as Kaito pushed and pulled into Kokichi, his grip on his neck tightening, ever so slightly, Kaito's heart racing with a longing and desire to just fucking lose it...but Kaito took a deep, shuddering breath into Kokichi's hair and loosened his grip, moving his hand from Kokichi's throat to his shoulder and collarbone, some of Kokichi's shirt caught in his new hold.

While Kokichi was distracted by the mention of Kaito being huge in him--and he was--he somehow managed to get in a few cooling breaths around the movements in his rear that made him want to beg for more. They had stuff to do tomorrow, and they'd both end up feeling awful if he got too sore and tired out to go. Kaito had a bro-date to set up, and there was no way Kokichi wanted to get in the way of that.

"Th-then stop trying to - ah - make me cum while you're prepping me! I wanna make Kai-chan feel good s-so it's hard when you're hu-hurrying me along," he groaned. Part of it was probably just that he got too much enjoyment out of being fingered, but Kaito certainly wasn't helping by seeking out his prostate.

Though, it soon seemed like Kaito decided he was loose enough, and Kokichi couldn't help bearing back a bit as Kaito wiped off on his ass, exposing his hole plainly for his husband's use. And he did.

"Uuuuunn..." Kokichi moaned, hiccuping a few times as Kaito pushed in, finally, finally filling him up, making him stretch in that not painful but delightful way. Like he always said, it wasn't an invasion, not when Kokichi could feel how he greedily swallowed in every inch, when, if life had been a comic book or something, there would've been hearts floating around his rear.

And, somehow, it got better.

Kokichi let out a few confused hums as Kaito lifted him up, but in a matter of seconds he got the message, reaching behind him to try and keep his balance. As Kaito held him upright, squeezing his neck gently, Kokichi only burned at how Kaito could feel his racing pulse and the vibrations of him trying to mewl and moan, only little squeaks actually escaping him.

There was a slight stretching burn in his thighs, spread and leaned backward, kept firmly in place by his husband while his wet, chubby cock was raised and twitching, exposed and glistening in the moonlight. Being short of breath, the fact that Kaito was so desperately turned on by him...Kokichi tried to hold on to any part of Kaito he could reach, his hole pulsing his excitement despite the fact Kaito was barely moving. Or maybe that made it better, able to keep Kokichi full and settled on that girthy cock.

"Ka - ah - ah," he panted when Kaito let his throat go, tipping his head back onto Kaito's chest. His own dick dripping down itself and his ass trying to give his mouth a run for its money with how it kept trying to practically massage Kaito.

Kaito grinned, unable to help himself, just still doing his little testing thrusts, rolling his hips into Kokichi's backside to see how much give there was, to see how firmly he could stretch Kokichi's body into place with his grip around his chest. As he felt Kokichi's hips move with him, he decided that was a little too much give, and shifted his legs forward, re-pinning Kokichi tighter against himself, even that small movement in his hips now gone, nowhere for Kokichi to go but back onto him when his hips were knocked forward.

Good. Perfect. Perfect.

God, Kokichi felt so good around him. His thin body morphing around Kaito's cock, sucking and pulling him in, his body so easy to move and hold and position into whatever random position entered Kaito's head. There were a thousand things he desperately wanted to do to Kokichi once he had full use of both his arms. Gods the things he would do to him...and that, amazingly, apparently, Kokichi would enjoy it. Because, honestly, if Kokichi had gotten past what Kaito had just done to him, the scare and the violation and the roughness that followed...

Kokichi might...be a bit of a masochist?

Kaito had no idea how to even begin to approach his husband about the idea, but it was a very real possibility, in light of everything that had just happened. And, while, again, Kaito would never again allow himself the temptation to take anything from Kokichi not explicitly already offered, guilt still wracking through him even now...if Kokichi had those tendencies, there were plenty of fun little games and experiments his husband might appreciate, done in a safe way.

There was no harm in offering those things to Kokichi, anyway. Kaito would talk to him about it someday.

For now, though...

"I tell you when you can cum, 'Kichi," Kaito cheerfully reminded his husband, picking up his tempo, no longer experimenting but knocking his hips into the Dicean Prince, enjoying the feeling of impact against him almost as much as the feeling of his dick digging through the walls of Kokichi's ass, Kokichi's gasps and breathing interrupted with every knock into him as Kaito tightened his grip around him. Kaito looked down and watched Kokichi's cock jump and knock against Kokichi's stomach as Kaito moved, and, his cast not in the sling and Kaito being careful to not put the actual break area under any real pressure, Kaito moved his wrapped arm up, taking his other hand up to Kokichi's mouth and shoving his fingers onto Kokichi's tongue, muting his cries and mewlings for a moment as he lathered his fingers against him. As Kaito said, full of possessive, jealous lust, "And I decided tonight I wanna fuck you through your orgasm."

As Kaito pounded and pushed into him, his fingers soaked with Kokichi's spit, he reached down to catch Kokichi's dick, working his husband's already slick, dripping member as he thrust.

Kokichi whined softly as Kaito stretched him further, not pained by it, but kept from moving even a little, the small effort he'd been putting in before taken away as his hips were left to bounce with the rhythm Kaito set. And that wasn't a bad thing! It felt really good, but...Kokichi wasn't doing anything. He'd tried to do something, and Kaito had stopped it so...had it been bad?

Uncertainty resurfaced in his chest, still dwarfed by the tension and heat growing in his belly, but there. The constant worry that he wasn't good enough, despite Kaito's assurances otherwise. But...if Kokichi was a good husband, then Kaito wouldn't have needed to--

"Uu - gah - ahh - mmm!" Kokichi's thoughts were stowed away for the time being--it was hard to think when a thick, long cock started fucking you. Only able to moan in bursts as each pound made him breathless, Kokichi just relaxed into Kaito's pace, letting his body be rocked and jolted and swayed however his husband saw fit. And, keeping himself obedient, Kokichi didn't move to touch himself even as the wet slapping sounds made him burn, the feeling of his ass jiggling the small amount it could with each thrust making him shake more than from Kaito's efforts, and, god, feeling Kaito's cock push and rake and press against every little bit of him...

Kokichi mewled loudly as he felt fingers push into his mouth and he sucked them eagerly, needing some sort of outlet for the pleasure pushing him ever closer to his peak. And while the feeling of his full dick being touched confused him for a moment, it was nothing to the feeling of the tight coil in his belly spring free.

"C-cAH-MAHH!!"

"There we go, there we go," Kaito murmured happily, feeling Kokichi tighten and spasm around him, his face flushed and heated as he watched Kokichi cry out and squirm through his orgasm. Kaito could feel Kokichi's thin muscles try to pull and push in the heat of his release, to maneuver itself in Kaito's grip, and the Luminary Prince enjoyed the effort it took to hold him still through it, his cum covered hand still massaging around Kokichi, milking him.

Kaito's own arousal was building as well, his balls, which slapped against Kokichi's ass with every pound, swelling painfully, the telling signs of his own orgasm coming soon as his dick came in and out of Kokichi easier with every thrust, slicked by his own pre-cum.

As Kokichi groaned and moaned, his body squirming at Kaito's persistent attention, Kaito suddenly decided he desperately wanted to look down at Kokichi's red face, to see those beautiful, wild, hazed eyes while he came. So though he could feel his orgasm coming, he stopped, slowed down and took a few breaths, and then, pulling himself mostly out, loosening his grip on Kokichi's chest, Kaito used his good arm to turn Kokichi's head up to him, kissing him deeply, lapping at his tongue and stealing his breath as Kokichi shivered.

When he was done kissing him, Kaito kissed his ear, taking the tip of his ear between his teeth and biting it slightly, before whispering, "You're doing so good, 'Kichi. God, I'm so lucky. You make me so happy. I'm almost done, just a little more. On your back now. Legs up."

Kokichi's eyes fluttered as his mouth went lax around Kaito's fingers, his body unable to shake to any rhythm but the one Kaito set, and so his orgasm was drawn out, pulsing to the beat of Kaito's thrusts and his hand milking him for all he was worth. And...Kokichi didn't really want to think about the pleasurable embarrassment at how he spilled in spurts, covering Kaito's hand but a few squirts landing on the bed.

He barely had a second to rest before Kaito twisted him and took his mouth, Kokichi kissing back with the same eagerness he took the fingers with, if sloppier, saliva escaping from the corners of his mouth. Especially as he whined and squealed softly at feeling Kaito pull out without finishing. Mostly because he felt so unbearably empty without Kaito inside, but also...

Kokichi panted and shook, tears beading in the corners of his eyes, Kaito's words of praise affecting him more than usual. It was just...so confusing! He should be able to pleasure Kaito, and his husband always assured him that he did, but...he always just did things on his own, even stopping Kokichi's efforts. He didn't...

Sniffling, Kokichi sped to assume the position Kaito requested, bouncing against the mattress a bit as he hooked his arms under his shaking thighs to hold them up and apart, showing off his reddened, swelling hole, his softening cock laying against his belly. "P-please... I want Kai-chan to c-cum too..."

Kaito watched adoringly as Kokichi moved quickly, his breath catching his throat at the full sight of him--his body wet with sweat, his cock covered and glistening with his cum, face red, breathing heavily and making himself open and available as he said such sweet, cute things to him with those wide, needing eyes...

Knowing he'd find himself leaning on it in a moment of mindlessness, Kaito tucked his casted arm against himself, reminding himself to hold it there by gripping his own side with it tightly. That taken care of, Kaito shuffled against Kokichi's backside, his dick not needing any assistance to get where it needed to go, rigid straight as he pushed back into Kokichi with literally no effort, Kokichi's body still warm and slick and eager to accept him back in, Kaito pushing all the way in, breathing heavily as he did so, his brain heavy and stupid with haze. He wasn't going to last long. But that was fine. Kokichi was already finished. Kaito just wanted to look at him as he rocked into his own climax.

And then, just because he wanted to see Kokichi's expression change a little, Kaito gave his sensitive, spent dick a few teasing pumps (maybe sometime soon they'd start trying for multiple orgasms. Kaito was still too uncomfortable to ask for it though, the wedding night always on the back of his mind), before he ran his hand up Kokichi's body, resting his hand on his collarbone and leaning down to kiss Kokichi again, once, twice, again, enjoying the sounds of Kokichi's lips against his own, the warmth of his breath. When he broke the kiss, he said, "I'm going to, I am. Gonna fill you up. I just wanna see you while I do. You're so beautiful. You're intoxicating."

And then, because Kokichi hadn't seemed to mind it last time, carefully, Kaito moved his hand back to Kokichi's neck, not putting any weight onto it, of course, but just...holding his fingers there, feeling Kokichi's pulse in his grip as he started to roll into Kokichi's ass again.

"You're...you're too good to me...y-your...ha-" Kaito grit his teeth, swallowing through his drool, his thigh muscles tightening as he pounded into Kokichi, watching, entranced, as Kokichi's small body shook and rippled at every move. "-ha...nnnn...you're so patient...you're so cute...F-FucK 'Kichi!" Kaito huffed, his grip tightening as he pushed and shoved and thrusted through the heat boiling of him, Kaito loosening his grip on Kokichi's neck and moving to the underside, lifting Kokichi's neck up so that Kaito could lean down and suckle against the skin there, moaning into his neck, the sound almost a whine as Kaito felt the pressure build, just thrusting desperately into Kokichi now.

"Ha..! Hnn~NN!" Kaito hummed and moaned, just breathing heavily into Kokichi's neck now, their bodies rocking into each other, Kaito's grip on the back of Kokichi's neck tight as he rode into him, feeling his dick suddenly, violently swell and tense as Kaito's eyes closed, shouting out, "FUCK, FfffucK, 'Kichi! 'Kichi, 'Kichi, my Kokichi, my Kokichi, oh my god...!"

Kaito's whole body pounding into Kokichi at the last moment, wanting to orgasm so badly, wanting it so much more this time than he had any of their other sessions, his need to cum into his husband almost primal as Kaito dug into Kokichi as deep as he could, the warm heat of his orgasm filling the deepest part of Kokichi, Kaito shuddering and gasping into Kokichi's neck, his heart pounding into his own ears, competing with a white noise there as Kaito felt his vision spot.

Fuck...fuck...

Kaito stared at Kokichi's shoulder, baffled by the intensity of that orgasm. Wow...fuck...

He rested against Kokichi for a moment, just breathing, not pulling out, not moving. He'd tell Kokichi he loved him in a moment. He'd look over his husband and access any damage in a moment, kiss at the parts that hurt him and remind him how much he adored him...in just a moment. For now, just... enjoying the end tides of his orgasm, holding Kokichi close and just marveling at how amazing he felt.

Fuck.

There was something immensely pleasing in how Kaito's dick slid right into him, though Kokichi knew that it was only because he'd been buried balls deep just a moment before. But Kokichi still clung to those words, saying how he was made for Kaito, how his body was a perfect fit, and in that moment it really felt like it. The moment passed as Kaito teased him, making Kokichi shudder and whine as his cock was overstimulated, but his husband made it up to him with sweet kisses and sweeter words.

A few tears were squeezed out of his eyes from being complimented, from being promised the world--and it was clearly lust talking if Kokichi considered Kaito cumming into him the world, but he was allowed to be dumb during sex shut up--and as Kaito ever so gently put the lightest pressure around his neck...

"L-love you...Kai...love...unph..." Kokichi gasped every word out, kept his legs up and open even as his whole body shook, Kaito feeling like way too much but in the best way. "Fill...m-me please..."

And Kaito did. Kokichi gasped sharply as he felt the length in his ass swell and burst, hot liquid shooting into him, making him feel warm all over while tears rolled down his cheeks with every call of his name, Kokichi letting his legs go to embrace his husband, holding him close.

And as they both started to calm...

"...sniffle...uu...uuhuh...squeak...huhhh..."

Kokichi didn't know why he was crying, actually full out crying and not just tears escaping his eyes, but he just felt... Confused and happy and satisfied and hurt and scared and...all sorts of things that he didn't know how to process, so he cried. Kokichi cried into his husband's shoulder, holding him close and keeping him inside and wanting everything to be okay though he didn't know what okay was right now.

As Kaito sighed happily, feeling his body start to cool, his heart rate going down as Kokichi clung to him, Kaito held him back, lazily starting to kiss the bits in reach, pressing his lips gently to him as he smiled. He could still feel Kokichi trembling against him, maybe still riding out his own good feelings, Kaito soothingly rubbed the back of his neck before pulling his hand out from under him, bracing himself to get onto his elbow, to kis-

"...sniffle..."

Kaito's eyes widened, everything in him suddenly freezing, his blood running cold.

"...uuhuh..."

...

.......?

...............!?!?!

Was Kokichi fucKING CRYING!?

Oh shit, oh fuck!

Kaito felt a sudden rush of fear run from his stomach to his chest, all good feelings left behind as Kaito hurried to get up, Kokichi coming up with him as he clung to Kaito's shoulders, his face buried into Kaito's shoulder, Kaito now feeling small, wet drops falling onto him. Oh no, oh no, oh no, no no no-

Kaito pulled out of Kokichi, feeling his husband shudder and tremble more violently for a moment as he did so, Kaito's heart breaking at the sound of his crying hiccuping into him. Fuck fuck fuck fuck, Kaito wrapped his arm around Kokichi's waist as he sat up, pulling Kokichi into his lap and holding him against his chest as Kaito, breathlessly, said, "Oh no, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, are you okay, are you hurt?" Kaito held tightly as he stared down at the top of his head, feeling him shake against him and each tremble sending another wave of guilt and horror through Kaito.

You motherfucker, you motherfucker, Kokichi's crying, you made him cry you evil piece of shit, fuck fuck fuck!

It only hurt more how Kaito panicked. How he worried over him and just... What was a wonderful time was just ruined by Kokichi, again. But he couldn't stop crying, couldn't hold in the sniffles and cries and hiccups, and he couldn't bring himself to pull away from Kaito either. He was just determined to scare his husband like this, huh.

He managed to shake his head a little to the question if he was hurt, but it was a long moment of blubbering before Kokichi could even get a syllable through. "I-ah-I'm s-sorry, I d-don't!"

"I-I'm not hurt - huuhuh - Dunno?!"

There was just...so much going through him all contradicting and confusing and Kokichi didn't know what to do but cry and hold himself against Kaito, which just made him feel worse since it wasn't fair to do this to Kaito, who had already helped him through so much and had his own issues to deal with and didn't deserve this.

It had been wonderful! Kokichi loved having sex with Kaito! So why was he--?!

Kaito held him close, staring down at Kokichi's back, his shirt pressing against him and hanging loosely depending on where his sweat had collected the most, and Kaito just held him and wondered, fuck, fuck, should he even be touching him right now?? He had been too rough, way too mean, had scared Kokichi awake by fucking molesting and choking him, and then had the fucking nerve to order him around and reposition him and fucking milk him and HOLY SHIT KAITO!?

Kaito didn't know if touching him after all that was the right way to go about this, but for the life of him, he couldn't...push Kokichi away, right?? While he was clinging to him like this? Fuck, Kaito didn't know. He really didn't know.

Okay, okay, breathe Kaito. Your husband needs you. Sure, this was all your fucking fault you god damned monster...but Kokichi didn't have anyone else right now. Not now, and not even later, Kokichi's hang ups about people knowing his sexual life meaning that whatever had just happened here that was bothering him so much...there wasn't a friend his prince was going to confide in. No trusted figure he'd go to for guidance.

It...it was just Kaito.

S-so, step up! You have to step up right now! Listen to what he's saying! What is he saying??

He's...saying he's confused. Okay. Okay.

Kaito kissed the top of Kokichi's head, rubbing his back gently as he said, "Okay. You don't have to know. Just...tell me everything running through your m-mind right now...if you think it's relevant or not, okay? Just talk to me babe, I'm not gonna leave you, I'm right here..."

Kokichi, again, just cried for a bit, feeling guilty and cruel for how Kaito was still taking care of him despite how this was doubtlessly freaking him out. But, even if it was cruel and selfish, Kokichi took solace in that care and desperately held those words, that Kaito wasn't leaving him, close.

"Tha-that was really good? I - sniff - I like it when K-Kai-chan has sex with me a-and I wanna be able t-to take care of him and make if f-fun for both of us a-and it is? Buh-but every time I try to please you, you always hold me still and...a-am I just bad? You tell me I'm good, but you never let me do anything for long a-and I...I'm confused?"

Kokichi sniffled and gasped a breath, scrunching his eyes shut tight against Kaito's shoulder. "S-so... Do you just like me as a sex toy? Am I so bad doing things myself that... Is that why you...y-you face-fucked me in my sleep?"

"Why?" he pleaded, shoulders shaking with frightened sobs, and Kokichi wasn't even processing his own words at this point, just letting them pour out lest he just confuse himself more. "Why would you do that?! R-raping me wasn't your fault before, bu-but now?! Why?!?"

"I love you, and I like how you are during sex, but when it leaks into life...I don't want people looking like Kai-chan like he's a monster! You're not! You're really sweet and kind and I k-keep being an asshole and breaking down because I trust you and I've never had anyone to confide in like this but it's so much to put on you when you have your own shit to work through too, and!" He had to gasp in a deep breath there, running out in his ranting as he pulled back slightly from Kaito to look at him, his wet purple eyes confused and hurt and caring so much for his husband that it drove him nuts. "I don't know! I don't know how I'm feeling and I'm scared and happy and confused and I hate making you deal with it!!"

Kaito listened, wide eyed, to Kokichi talk, gently rubbing his back...right up until the sex toy comment. And he kept listening, but now his hand went off Kokichi's back and over his own eyes, Kaito hiding behind it as he listened to the rest, a tight grimace on his face, his back tense enough to crack rocks on as he listened to what his husband poured out of himself.

He only let his hand drop when he felt Kokichi shift away from him, Kaito opening his eyes to look down at his oh no no no no Kaito couldn't stand it, look at his husband, look at what he did, fuck, Kaito, look at what you did...

Kaito had promised to protect him...he had wanted nothing more than to let Kokichi be happy, to support him in every way, whatever it took...look what he did...

Kaito wasn't ever going to tell Kokichi about the sleep-sucking, because it wasn't even kind of relevant to everything that had happened when Kaito had woken up. Kokichi could be in the middle of giving Kaito a blowjob, awake and consenting, and say 'no' at any point, and after that, everything that had happened before Kaito continued to touch him was irrelevant. It didn't matter, Kaito's motives for molesting (r...raping?) Kokichi. Nothing justified it.

So that was out of the pool of answers Kaito could provide to Kokichi's numerous, terrifying questions. So...so...

...what...did Kaito have to say for himself?

...o-one point at a time? Pause to let Kokichi rant, or rebuke, or scream at him, if he needed to, but one point at a time. And don't do it like last time. Kaito still felt guilty over how much the two had left unsaid and unaddressed the last time Kokichi had confided in him like this. Kaito would insist. All of this was important. They were going to talk about all of it.

Okay...okay...

"...f-first of all?" Kaito said, deciding that easily the most fucking important thing needed to be addressed, taking Kokichi's face into his good hand and wiping some of the tears away with his thumb, his whole body trembling as he looked down at Kokichi, his own face a twisted mixture of fury and concern. "You are no one's sex toy. Fucking no one gets to treat you like that, alright!? And..."

Kaito's brows furrowed, his eyes stinging red as he put his hand on Kokichi's shoulder, squeezing it firmly as he said, guilt pooling in him like poison, "...a-and I'm so sorry that I've been treating you like that...fuck, Kokichi, I'm so sorry...I..."

Kaito realized he couldn't actually look at his husband as he said this, so he took his hand back and covered his eyes, saying into the darkness, "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, it was never okay for me to treat you like that. You are not a sex toy to me, you're my husband, and I-I r-really love you, I'm devoted, I s-swear! Th-there's no excuse for why I did any of that, but...but I just...god this is so fucking shitty for me to say, but I want to give you context because you asked me and...fuck!"

Kaito lowered his hand and looked miserably at his husband and said, "..it...it just m-makes me feel powerful. To just...feel like I have total control o-over you...n-no one's ever let me feel like that before, like I'm just some...o-overwhelming presence. A-and...and I've found m-myself pushing the boundaries of what you'd let me do every time we touch each other and...it's not your fault, it's in no way your fault, but...I-I just never felt like I hit any w-walls. So I just...got comfortable pushing at the limits. Seeing what I could get away with, a-and..."

Kaito almost didn't say it. Not because it sounded evil, or because it might frighten Kokichi...but just because he didn't want to have to admit to himself this was what happened...but...

"...I...I told myself..that it was fine to touch you in your sleep...be-because when it came to sex, you belonged to me...because awake or asleep, I'd still be the one in control..."

Kaito rubbed the back of his neck for a moment...and then growled, pulling at the hair on the back of his neck as he half-shouted, "But, FUCK, Kokichi, none of th-that is you being...a f-fucking sex toy, or, or, bad at sex?? Fuck, none of that is your fault, I'm just...fucking playing out some shitty power-fantasy on you and didn't fucking stop to think what the fuck that would look like on your end, o-or how that would make you feel about yourself, or...that's not your fault! Fuck, I wish you would have just...slapped me or screamed at me or...fuck!"

It was then that Kokichi realized that was his main issue with anyone knowing about his sex life, or thinking about him in any sexual way whatsoever. What Chisa and Tengan had done to them, had done to him, it just...made him feel like a toy. The way people would coo over how cute he was and want to dress him up or watch whatever he did, it was like he was just a doll to them, free for them to play with. And he hated it.

Kokichi sniffled a bit more and rubbed his nose, working his jaw before speaking again. "...Unless I'm sneaking around, I never feel like I have any control over anything...so I fight against it, even if nothing changes. But...when I'm with you, it doesn't feel like I have to fight... Like...I can trust you to make it the best experience for both of us, and you do!"

He looked up at Kaito imploringly, putting a cold, gentle hand on one of Kaito's legs. "I have a lot of fun when we're together, and even if it turns out to be too rough, it's only because I asked for it. And...I feel like it's okay to be overwhelmed with you...but it's not fair."

It...was just like Kaito's general trust in him, wasn't it? What his husband really meant when he said he believed in him. But Kokichi had never told Kaito, and that was a lot of responsibility to hold.

"...if you had woken me up and asked...I would've said yes..." Kokichi's voice was quiet, vulnerable. But a little stronger than it had been. "And...because of that, because I trust you, I just...let it go. You were hard and I was horny and...I thought it'd be fine if we just banged. I wanted to make you happy..."

"...but it's not fair of me to just...say nothing when something comes up. How else are you supposed to know?" He balled his hands up against his stomach, frustrated with himself. "I'm sorry..."

Kaito looked down at him, openly distressed, vaguely wishing he could worry and pop the joints in his hands, as he listened to Kokichi apologize to him of all things. Which was, just...actual madness. Why did Kokichi think he needed to apologize?! Kaito had been horrible to him. Kokichi shouldn't have had to tell him that something was wrong when Kaito fucking woke him up accidentally while trying to fucking rape him...it w-wasn’t the sort of thing that Kaito shouldn't have been able to guess himself!

...and it wasn't like he hadn't guessed either...Kaito had been terrified when Kokichi had woken up. He had known what he was doing was wrong, that it would hurt his husband, and...he had just done it anyway and...

"You...n-need to hold me to higher standards," Kaito murmured, his stomach twisting in mild fear as he said so, because this was, ever so gently, touching upon a subject that had been bothering Kaito ever since he had gotten to know Kokichi...to understand his situation in this castle. Kaito's ever growing, constant confusion at Kokichi's willingness to just...forgive everyone for horrifying shit... "You need to hold everyone to higher standards...it's not fair for me to treat you badly and wait for you to complain, especially when you're new to sex and relationships and I've just...I have so much more experience than you, Kokichi. I...I knew what I was doing was fucked up. I'm not innocent or naive o-or… You can and should expect more from me. You shouldn't apologize to me when I do something awful to you, even if you don't say anything...not when you're scared or overwhelmed or trusting me to know better, because yes, I should fucking know better...and it's okay to be mad at me when I don't live up to that shit...when anyone doesn't live up to that shit..." Kaito practically growled, a whole...list of people in this castle coming to mind.

He wasn't going to bring it up. It wouldn't be fair to have that argument with Kokichi right now. But...fuck, someday they were going to have that one out.

Kaito gripped his fist, pressing it into his leg for a second, feeling slightly better when one joint, then two, slightly popped against the pressure...then he took a deep breath. Hesitantly, carefully, Kaito took one of Kokichi's hands (his bound one. Of course his bound one) into his hand, soothingly rubbing his thumb over Kokichi's knuckles as well as he said, sadly, "You keep...saying things about me being happy. About you 'making' me happy, or, I don't know...saying you shouldn't bother me with shit and… Kokichi, you do make me happy. I get...it's so strange." Kaito mused, bringing up Kokichi's hand and kissing him against the side of his pinky, "I got such a fucking high pretending like I had some total control over you while we're making love, but...in every other part of our relationship, I just take...so much comfort in this idea of being there for you. Of being, I don't know...like your hero, or something. My prince's knight in shining armor… I know that's stupid, and, it's gonna sound so hypocritical alongside what I want to say next, but...I've almost gotten to the point, in my head, where serv-" Kaito stopped himself, closing his eyes. Wrong word. Wrong word. Use a different word... "...where being there for you feels like it gives me purpose, you know? I'm so happy every time you let me in, let me help you with something, let me support you, so that you're freed to...show everyone how amazing you actually are… It's not something I ever want you to stop doing. I'd feel so lost if you stopped confiding in me...trusting in me..."

Kaito sighed, again, aware of his hypocrisy as he said, "...and sometimes I'm not happy here. I try to be, I do, but...it's hard adjusting, sometimes. But, I think that's always going to happen, no matter what, and...it's not your job to take on the fucking miserable responsibility of trying to make me happy again, when it all becomes too much. Me being unhappy isn't your fault. You don't...you don't have to fucking do shit like n-not tell me that you were scared when you woke up f-fucking...choking and...not for something as stupid as making Kai-chan 'happy'. That's not something I ever want to ask of you. It's not what I want from you."

He...he wanted a Kokichi that felt confident enough and self assured enough to yell at him. To hold him to higher standards. He didn't want to turn his fucking husband into a god damn sex toy...

Kokichi felt his shoulders hunch in a little but he made himself give a few nods. He didn't know how to really explain that...it was almost impossible to get himself to consider punishing another person for slights against him. Normally it was just...fine. In his opinion, there was no need to punish someone when they were already punishing themself. That was how things worked--if someone had done something wrong, then they'd want to correct it. And if they couldn't...then adding to their burden was just cruel.

That was why the secretaries were so terrifying, why so many of the things Kaito said about Luminary were things he just couldn't understand. Because they did horrible things, and didn't feel bad about it. It was like they weren't even human...

Or maybe just not the sort of Dicean Kokichi had grown up around. Seeing people destroy themselves with regret and grief had certainly colored how the young prince saw the world.

Another round of tears started sliding down Kokichi's cheeks as Kaito touched on something that...well, Kokichi did see it as his personal responsibility to ensure Kaito's happiness. To uphold the trust the other prince placed in him, to make up for the fact that Kaito wouldn't have to be in this scary new place if it weren't for Kokichi.

With all of that, Kokichi pressed his lips together and gently laced his fingers with Kaito's. "I'm...supposed to take care of everyone...it's why I'm here... You're my husband--for you of all people, when things aren't good...I'm supposed to help. If I can't even do that..."

...then why was he there? Why was he alive? Why wasn't there a proper, stronger heir that people could place their trust into and be looked after like things were supposed to go? Why did he have to put everything he had into caring for people behind the scenes to reach even a little of that standard? Why couldn't he properly help the one person who had ever reached back?

Kokichi sniffled a bit, loosely hugging himself with his free hand. "...if you already feel bad about it, why do I have to be mad at you?"

"Sure, yes! Help!" Kaito said, overwhelmed, feeling himself start to raise his voice as he just got so frustrated, furious at himself for hurting Kokichi and, just, angry that Kokichi couldn't see why that wasn't okay. "Help is great! A-and it's why a lot of things here work, okay, I get that, but...not at your own fucking...detriment!? Not help to the point where you're ready and prepared to give me a pass raping you, Kokichi, seconds after finding out! That's not help, it's self-destruction!"

Kaito let go of Kokichi's hand, covering his eyes again, breathing deeply as he tried to calm himself... So fucking desperate to explain his point of view, but he and Kokichi...they just saw two different worlds. It was like they weren't even living in the same reality...Kaito couldn't even begin to fathom that last question. It was so alien to him...

And...and Kaito was just so afraid for this version of Kokichi. The one who grew up surrounded by adults who had wanted to kill him...and a child version of his already frail and oppressed husband had been made responsible for fucking...forgiving them...being the bigger person...

Fuck! Fuck, fuck...

"...because fuck how I feel," Kaito murmured, not even sure what he was trying to accomplish now. He wanted Kokichi's forgiveness, of course he did. And he wouldn't ever do it again. He wouldn't...but...even if Kaito wanted all those things, it...he hated the idea that Kokichi just...would let him...

"Because maybe it doesn't matter if I feel bad. Maybe it doesn't matter that I won't ever do it again...a-and it's unforgivable I did it at all...because it's not your responsibility to forgive me, Kokichi..."

Kaito looked at Kokichi, and felt like...he probably wasn't making any sense to the other prince. And fury licked his heart at this. He just...couldn't understand why Kokichi...

Fuck it. Kokichi had already made up his mind, to his weird, frightening Dicean ways. But Kaito was a Luminary. He might as well do his end the Luminary way. Even if Kokichi and his people didn't agree with Kaito and his...

There was a ritual for situations like these.

Kaito gently pushed Kokichi off of him, kissing him on the top of his skull in apology, before quietly heading to one of his armor cases, still sitting in the corner of their room. He opened up his wedding armor, knowing it would be there, shifting through the contents with a practiced ease, finding the piece he was looking for.

A sharp, clean dagger, with a golden hilt. Meant to accompany the sword.

Kaito stared at the sheathed dagger dispassionately, before taking it out of the sheath and putting the sheath aside. Going back to Kokichi. Determined.

Knowing Kokichi wouldn't like it, but he had to understand, he had to understand, Kaito grabbed Kokichi's hand with the one he was holding the dagger with, forcing its hilt into his husband's palm. He stared at Kokichi, his face blank, just accepting of whatever the future would be as, still tightly holding Kokichi's hand in his grip, he positioned the dagger next to his neck, the tip of the blade hovering, just ever so slightly away, from Kaito's neck.

Then, taking a breath, holding Kokichi's hand in place, Kaito bent into a submission bow in their bed.

"I submit myself to your judgement and ask forgiveness," Kaito said, exhausted...carefully letting go of Kokichi's hand, putting his own palm down next to his head. "I know you won't...but it's important to me that you know that you could."

Kokichi wanted to argue that...that people made mistakes! That sometimes they followed faulty logic, or were manipulated, or were just confused! So they made mistakes, and holding that over their heads forever didn't help anyone. If Kaito truly did regret doing what he had, then he wouldn't do it again, so...so letting it go wasn't self-destructive, was it?

...he loved Kaito, and Kokichi truly believed that his husband wouldn't do this sort of thing again, but...with that belief, if Kaito kept making mistakes, how many would Kokichi be willing to forgive? But if he couldn't believe in Kaito then why were they together at all?

Kokichi winced, that thought physically making something in his chest hurt.

"...isn't it, though? You've proven yourself to have my trust, you've proven worthy of forgiveness so..." Kokichi trailed off, confused, as Kaito got off the bed and then his eyes widened in alarm as he retrieved a dagger. Kokichi tried to let go of it, to pull away from Kaito's neck, but stopped when the other prince's grip held firm, not wanting to cause an accident.

Kokichi's expression was crumpled, frightened and upset at the display, but...if this was how Kaito wanted to prove himself, then...this was probably the safest situation for it. And so Kokichi held the dagger in place for a beat after Kaito let him go before setting it down gently on the bed.

"...you will never do something like that to me, ever, without my consent."

It wasn't a question.

"I know you agree so...I can forgive you. Even if it was scary and I didn't know what was happening. I can forgive you because you know what you did was wrong, and I know that you want to make up for it." Kokichi sighed, extremely tired and drained, and gently pushed up on one of Kaito's shoulders. "Please get up."

Kaito took a slightly shuddering breath (even for submission bows where it felt like a sure thing, there was always that tension there, the possibility of 'maybe'...), straightening up and looking at Kokichi miserably, not...not really feeling any better, per se, but at least feeling like he couldn't offer Kokichi a more sincere (at least, by his own culture’s standards) apology than that. And his husband's response...at least he had taken it seriously this time.

"I swear, Kokichi. Never again," Kaito swore, subconsciously using his now free hand to support his cast arm, the arm being out and active outside of its sling for longer now than it had been since he had first gotten it, the bone starting to ache. He wasn't really conscious of that though, still just trying to think of how he and Kokichi could move past this, how Kaito could try to be better... "I love you, Kokichi… I just...I get so impulsive and stupid sometimes...but I don't ever want to hurt you. Please tell me if I'm hurting you… I can be so fucking dumb..."

Kaito looked down at the dagger beside Kokichi and sighed. He should probably put that back...no doubt if anyone was aware it was in this room with Kokichi, the king would want to have a word with both of them...or at least, Kokichi, anyway, since his son seemed to be the one person here that the king didn't actually trust explicitly...

Kaito frowned, frustrated with that thought.

Ya know what?

Kaito grabbed the dagger, heading back to the case and grabbing the sheath, putting the dagger back into it. Then he brought the sheathed dagger back to Kokichi and, with a serious look on his face, put it in his lap.

"That's yours now," Kaito told him. "That's the ceremonial dagger for my wedding armor. It practically belonged to you already. And now it's the dagger you spared me with...it's important," Kaito insisted...before sighing, looking up at Kokichi warily. "I know that no one can know you have it. I don't know if you even want it...but it's yours, okay. I just...even if you never use it...I want you to have something that can hurt other people. To have something dangerous. To have an item that's only purpose is to give you the ability to do something purely self-serving...I mean, I guess you could try to open letters with it or cut rope, too, but, like, it's not a good tool for stuff like that and you'd probably only end up cutting your hand by accident and..."

Kaito shook his head. He was getting off track.

"I love you...and because I love you, it would make me feel better that if you ever needed something like that, you had it," Kaito said, reaching out to put his hand hesitantly on Kokichi's leg. Not wanting to...to try to press his touch onto him right now, but at the same time...needing to express some of that physical affection in this moment. As he tried to explain something important to him.

"No matter what anyone else says...it's yours, okay?"

"...okay..." he murmured, giving at least that much. "I...I think I need to give some thought to what "hurting" really means for me, but...I'll tell you. Whatever I'm feeling...I'll try to tell you." This would probably all make so much more sense if Kokichi had any idea of how to be in a relationship, but...Kaito was right. Kaito was his first in so many categories, and while Kokichi was doing his best to figure things out...it'd be better to actually ask the experienced person rather than just act like he had things under control.

Looking around the bed a little, Kokichi found his shorts and tried to wipe away the stickiest parts of him, not sure what was sweat and what was cum, though he was pretty sure Kaito had milked him into his hand pretty well... He'd just tossed the shorts off the bed and slid his underwear back on when Kaito returned with the sheath and...

...and another weight was pressed upon him. Other people had weapons, and while Kokichi had found them cool and fought against never being able to get too close...he never wanted to own one. He didn't want to have to hurt another person, but...it was worse for him to rely on someone else to do the hurting for him, when the situation demanded it. When he wasn't able to deescalate something...if he didn't have to put anyone else in harm's way...

Kokichi held the dagger for a moment before tucking it away in the nightstand, planning to find a better hiding place for it in the morning. And then he scooted forward and hugged Kaito, his tears drying up.

"...thank you. I don't want to have to use it, but if I need it, it'll be here," he affirmed, pressing his lips to Kaito's shoulder. "I love you, Kaito. I wish I could make sense of everything, but until I do, I'll just trust in you, and expect you to perform to that level of trust. Okay?"

Kaito stared sadly down at his husband for a moment as he hugged him, Kaito hesitating only for a second before holding him back tightly, ashamed of himself. God, it didn't feel right to be touching his husband right now, after everything that just happened… Kokichi had to share a fucking bed with him...but if the Dicean Prince didn't want to kick Kaito out, at least for the night, then...

Kaito sighed. He wasn't going to deny his husband physical comfort just because he was personally feeling ashamed and wanted some sort of punishment from Kokichi. He had already offered Kokichi every possible recourse Kaito knew, and refusing to accept Kokichi's forgiveness would be more self-serving than actually helping his husband in any way. If Kokichi was just...going to blindly trust Kaito again, the Luminary Prince would just have to hold himself accountable for not letting Kokichi down.

So Kaito nodded, hugged Kokichi back, and rested his head onto the top of Kokichi's hair as he said, "Okay. I love you too. I'll live up to it 'Kichi, I promise."

Kaito sighed, running his hand up and down Kokichi's back. "Man, tomorrow morning is going to be rough. You sure you're going to be up to going to town after training? We could always talk to the doctor later if you want to sleep in," Kaito asked, looking down at himself, only wearing his boxers still and feeling a little gross. "Also, maybe we should both shower before going back to bed real quick. I, uh...I did a number on us. You can go first if you want to."

"I'm expecting you to." No more mistakes, at least not of this type. There wouldn't be a next time, because Kaito would keep his promise, and Kokichi would believe in him. That's what trust and love meant to him.

Sighing, Kokichi wanted to be stubborn, to insist that the plans they'd made for tomorrow would be fine...but he was exhausted and there was no telling how his rear would be feeling, even though Kaito had taken extra time to prep him. Or...how he'd be feeling in a non-physical way.

"...we'll see tomorrow..." he murmured, pressing his forehead against Kaito's shoulder. Before he let out a soft, yet drawn out groan. "I'm too tiiiiiiired... And I came on the sheets, so it'll still be gross. I'll shower in the morning..."

Honestly, he wasn't sure if he'd be able to make it to the bathroom and then take a shower by himself with his body feeling all loose and jelly-like. Not to mention the static of exhaustion buzzing in his head, both from orgasming and having...something of an emotional breakdown. Kokichi...just wanted to sleep. Sleep in his husband's arms and...feel better tomorrow. Leave this behind.

Kaito sighed, kind of wanting to get all the evidence of the incredibly shitty thing he did off of them...but-- "Well, I'll end up just getting all sticky again if I shower and then come back to hold ya, so, I guess we'll just be sticky and sweaty together, huh?"

Kaito put his arm around Kokichi, kissed him on the forehead, and waited for the night to end.

-

Shuuichi woke up...and felt curiously okay.

He had expected, like everyone else, that he'd wake up extremely hungover, sick and exhausted and sore. But...no, not really. He felt fine. He felt...

...oh no.

What had happened yesterday!?

Shuuichi stared at the ceiling in horror, fists gripping the blanket Kaito had managed to coax him into, just...baffled. Oh...oh...Shuuichi looked warily around for his hat and, finding it on the other side of his bed, grabbed it and threw it onto his face, hiding in its semi-darkness as his mind raced through the events of yesterday.

They had caught him. He had run and they had caught him, and then...they had made him drink the beer down. And he had sputtered and coughed through it, but they had been patient. Even gentle, in a horrifying view of the concept, waiting for him to calm down every time it looked like he might vomit or started to choke, feeding him at first sips, and then mouthfuls at a time.

By the time Shuuichi had finished drinking, his head had felt hot and warm, and his view on things...

Then he had sat down with the three of them, listening to them talk, to explain, to appease and joke and rant hotly about the way of the world, and the people in charge, and how the 'only way out is through', and Shuuichi had listened and...it had all made so much sense. It had sounded incredible.

Like...of course, that was the way things should be.

This slow, painful, boring existence of humanity just...it was all so superfluous. So much unnecessary bullshit, being put up with by a species that continued to struggle with it all even with the monstrous understanding that there was no point to it...torture, torture, humanity was being tortured. It needed to end. One big, massive, self destructive party, with all of the party-goers prepped and ready to to enjoy themselves no matter how dark or painful or despair-inducing that end looked...not just ready to go, but to go out having a blast...

A mercy killing of the species.

Oh, sure, it wouldn't be easy, Itch had explained. It might not even be our generation that finally gets to go. But as more and more people are brought into the organization, all of us with our own part to play in the overall plan... like me, for example working on a beer that can mass-effect people...once that beer is perfected, think how easy it'll be to prep large groups of people, anywhere and everywhere, for their joyful demise. And people all over the world were working on their own contributions to the plan, he had explained to an enthralled, blushing Shuuichi...

...it had...it had made so much sense...

...did...did it still?

Sober now, though no doubt the pollen still coursing through Shuuichi's system, if at least not as potent as yesterday, Shuuichi laid there and tried to seriously think about it. When that quickly became overwhelming, he grabbed his journal and started to write.

RoD=species suicide, using DP to prep species to go. DP=Happy deaths (? are all victims happy? no outliers to chemicals?). DP= pleasure from situations that humans are instinctively risk-adverse, IE terror, pain, guilt, hatred, etc, all classified under term 'Despair'. If all species addicted to despair=enjoyable species extinction.

Shuuichi paused, reading that back to himself with a furrowed brow, before writing in:

...worse ways to go?? mercy killing= merciful??? is my uncertainty due to log conc, or DP addiction?

Shuuichi's eyes widened at this, staring at the words in horror, before writing in, hands shaking:

Am I DP Addicted?

-

Thankfully, Kokichi was dream-free for the rest of the night. And, when morning came, as it always did, he looked out at the light streaming through the window and scrunched his eyes shut.

Fuck

...last night, in a haze of lust and power-tripping, his husband had molested him. And then Kokichi'd had sex with him. ...intent didn't erase actions.

...today was totally gonna suck.

He had a headache and his body was sore, though not as much as the day before, but...he could live through it. He'd sit in on training, then they'd go to town and he'd ask Dr. Kimura to go on their trip as their medical specialist, and then he'd come back and work while Kaito and Shuuichi had their bro-date. Okay.

But he needed a shower first.

Kokichi gently extracted him from their bed and headed to the bathroom, trying not to...really feel anything. That would make this easier.

Kaito had intense nightmares all night, waking up every hour or so with his heart pounding and his body sweating, each and every time checking on Kokichi, not remembering the dreams themselves, but knowing each time that Kokichi had been hurt, or was in trouble, or was dying...

And each time he had woken up and checked on Kokichi, he was reminded before he went back to sleep...fuck, fuck, he had raped Kokichi in his sleep, FUCK.

Rape? Did it count as a rape? Arguing the technical term seemed petty, but Kaito found himself genuinely worrying over it, one of the hours he had woken up. Rape was...did it have to be penetration? Or just forced sexual interaction? Did it matter??? Neither definition absolved him! If it was the second definition, it was definitely rape. If it was the first definition, well, ha ha ha, guess what Kaito did?? He fucking shoved his filthy fucking dick literally down Kokichi's throat, which sounded like a penetration to the Luminary Prince!

Ha ha ha, FUCK!

When Kaito had been woken up by Kokichi's movements, he had pretended to stay asleep, keeping himself still and his eyes closed...ya know...like he should have done last night!??

God...what was he going to do? The whole midnight conversation last night had been painful and uncomfortable enough, but now Kaito had to just...what?? Pretend like nothing had happened?? Be normal today???

The guilt was intense. Kaito was going to vomit.

As he heard his husband start the shower in the bathroom, it occurred to Kaito that he couldn't actually handle seeing Kokichi half naked right now, when he came out in a towel. Kaito had very purposefully bruised up and down Kokichi's back, and right now, those marks were more uncomfortable reminders than anything fun. He...he...he needed to do something...

Quickly getting out of bed, Kaito hurried to gather some clean workout clothes before, still just in his boxers, he ran out of the room, determined to go take a shower in Shuuichi's room. Then...then he'd go to training! And...and if Kokichi wanted to see him, he'd be there, but if he didn't, well, Kaito would see him at breakfast! And that way Kaito wasn't just fucking looming like a creep over Kokichi all damn morning, his husband not even getting a second away from him...

...yeah...that was the reason he was doing this. Totally not because of how filled with dread Kaito was at facing what he had done again today.

Yeah.

-

Shuuichi stared at the long list of notes and observations he had written down, trying to work out if he was addicted to the despair pollen, and if so, what that meant for him. He had half a jar left of the stuff, which would probably last him a few months if he kept going a pinch at a time every day...but after it was gone, that was it. Shuuichi didn't have any way to get any more. So that...was an almost immediate future kind of problem.

Itch and his group had, at the very least, a version of the chemical that was in the pollen, which he was using for his beer...that was potentially a limitless supply, right there...if Shuuichi was willing to team up with his group. Which Shuuichi, even with some of the despair chemical still coursing through his veins, even when the idea didn't sound...horrible or anything...

The thought of betraying his friends still gave him pause. Made him incredibly uncomfortable, in a non-fun way. Sure, there was some...tingling, at the idea of the looks on their faces when they found out, but...but the actual repercussions of such an event, being that he lost their friendship or that they were seriously hurt in some way, still made Shuuichi unhappy. So...

He had to tell them what was going on. He had to. Those three had targeted Shuuichi for a reason--they had been looking for the princes originally, after all. They were going to hurt his friends if Shuuichi didn't turn them in, and that by itself was enough of a motive to do so.

...and then the beer would be gone, and eventually, Shuuichi's jar half filled with pollen would be gone, and...

Shuuichi shuddered at the idea. Trying to go without it. He felt a tightness in his chest, a sense of panic at the very idea. No, no, he couldn't....he couldn't, he couldn't, he...

They were going on a trip to Danganronpa.

That was right. The princes were excited about it. They were all going on a trip to the other country soon, right? They had said when they had told Maki and Shuuichi at the pub that they were just waiting for Kaito to heal and they'd make the trip.

So, what...another month at most? Shuuichi had at least a few months’ more worth of the pollen, and the Dead Forest was right next to the border. He could make it till then.

There. That was the answer. Shuuichi would turn the trio in, keep his own addiction a secret, and then during the trip to Danganronpa, would restock himself and work out a system to always get more.

Perfect. It was all going to work out. It was all going to be fine. He would-

There was a knock at the door. "Shuuichi, it's me! I'm basically naked out here, could you let me in, please??"

Shuuichi looked over at the door in surprise, going over quickly and opening up the door for his friend, raising an eyebrow as he saw that Kaito was, indeed, basically naked as the prince quickly hurried in, thanking him as he walked by...

...oh shit.

Shuuichi's eyes went wide, his face going bright red as just...fuck, Kaito literally reeked of sex. It was radiating off him like a heat. He looked tired too, though he had a grin plastered to his face as he said, "Hey, man, can I use your shower? Kokichi's in ours and I just don't wanna be late for training with Maki."

Stuttering, unable to entirely look at Kaito as just...his own loins curled and ached at the scent of him, Shuuichi nodded. "Y-yeah, of course. Please, go ahead, take your time, Kaito."

"Thanks man! I owe you!" Kaito said, sounding genuinely grateful, before heading off to the shower.

Shuuichi went to go sit on his bed, staring at the ceiling, eyes slightly too wide and heart pounding now...too much. That had been too much...

...he needed some of the pollen. That would make it easier to calm down. Shuuichi was certain of it. It didn't matter that he knew he still had some in his system from yesterday. He needed another dose this morning.

Deciding, Shuuichi quickly went to his poison bag, fetched the jar, and took his medicine.

-

Kokichi was usually a prompt bather, but that morning he found himself just standing under the spray with a blank expression on his face. Every now and then he'd turn the water a little hotter, adjusting to the current temperature and wanting it warmer.

Kaito had raped him.

Again.

And he'd done nothing.

Again.

...self-destructive. ...he knew what he wanted out of Kaito. He wanted his husband happy and healthy and able to empower and inspire the people around him like a true leader--the person he'd been able to catch glimpses of here and there. And he just...wanted Kaito to ask before they started anything. There was nothing he could do about any of that that he wasn't already doing. So...what?

Kokichi sighed and stepped out of the shower, grimacing at the deep pink his skin had turned. They just had to keep going forward and trying their best. That was all anyone could do.

By the time Kokichi had dressed and gathered the materials he needed to work, his skin hadn't faded much, but that was the least of his concerns. It looked like Kaito had already headed off to training, likely showering in one of the escorts' showers. Kokichi didn't really want to talk to anyone, but...they should at least talk to Shuuichi about the day's plan.

His expression betraying nothing, Kokichi knocked at the detective's door.

Kaito had been in and out, the man a bundle of obviously nervous energy, talking to Shuuichi a mile a minute without saying anything in particular, and definitely not actually listening to anything the detective managed to utter back. Which was good, because otherwise he might’ve noticed that Shuuichi's face was bright red and his whole body was shrinking into itself as Kaito thought nothing of changing in front of him. And why should he? Shuuichi had never felt like this before...

And when Kaito had left, fully changed, throwing his boxers and one of Shuuichi's towels into his hamper, the detective had returned to just lying on his bed, staring at the ceiling...thinking about the scent that Kaito had left behind in the hamper, wondering, okay...there had to be a limit to how creepy Shuuichi could be. There had to be. The whole concept of panty-snatchers, which he had only ever seen as a joke in stories, had always sounded like a baffling, gross concept to the detective...like...even for people capable of getting turned on, Shuuichi had reasoned, there couldn't possibly be anything sexual in dirty underwear...

...his stomach twisting in shame, Shuuichi sat up to go to the hamper, but was, thankfully, distracted by a sudden knock at the door.

Opening it up, the escort was more than a bit surprised to see a freshly made up for the day Prince Kokichi...well, a slightly red, fresh for the day Kokichi. He had been expecting it to be Maki, or maybe even Timothy. Kokichi rarely visited.

Still... Shuuichi smiled, readjusting his cap and grateful for the distraction as he said to the prince, "Ah...good morning, Kokichi. Uh, did you need something? You can come in, if you like."

Shuuichi looked better, at least. And not incredibly hungover, which was nigh on miraculous. Offering Shuuichi a smile in return, Kokichi shook his head. "Morning, Shuu-chan, but no thanks. I wanted to ask if you wanted to go watch training together this morning, and if not, at least ask if you were going to see Dr. Kimura today? I wanna talk to her about some stuff, and since you're doin' a study or whatever, I thought I'd tag along sometime..."

"In any case, I'm glad to see it looks like you're doing okay? You were gone yesterday," Kokichi laughed softly. "How are you feeling?"

It was easier than he'd been expecting to talk to someone, but maybe that was just because he was wholly focused on Shuuichi and not about...anything else. He knew he wouldn't be able to deflect any comments or questions aimed towards himself all day, but...he could get a lot of them, probably. And that would have to be enough.

Shuuichi frowned briefly, a touch concerned at the request to go to the pharmacy with him...but, well, that was why he had had that whole uncomfortable conversation with her yesterday, wasn't it? Explaining to her that in a fit of nerves he had given her an entirely unnecessary false name? He had done it specifically in case any of his friends wanted to meet her, and apparently he had been right to not put it off. So... "Yes, to everything."

Realizing that might not be the most helpful answer, Shuuichi hummed sheepishly to himself as he re-thought it, settling on, "I feel pretty good, actually, thanks for asking. I know, I know, I don't...I don't usually get like that. I hope I didn't say anything embarrassing...it's all a little blurry now, by the time I got back to the castle. I sort of remember getting Kaito the information he wanted and then him putting me to bed. That's about it." Shuuichi shrugged.

He smiled warmly at Kokichi, though there was...something bugging him. At the back of his mind. What was it...? "And it'd be nice to sit in the yard and watch Maki and Kaito be all," Shuuichi waved his hand vaguely, shrugging, "You know. Active. If you want to join me, I'd love to sit with you. And, of course you can come with me to the pharmacy, Kokichi. I'm going this morning if you'd like to come along. I'm going to assume that means Kaito's coming as well?"

What was bothering Shuuichi? It was the observational part of his brain, picking at him. There was the smallest little red and blue mark, roughly on Kokichi's jugular, but...that was actually sort of common for the Dicean Prince, these days. He made an effort to hide the hickeys, certainly, but Shuuichi spent enough time with him to notice it whenever the prince forgot himself and let them show. In fact, he and Maki had a conversation at one point, wondering if maybe one of them should take Kaito aside and tell him to cool it with the marks; neither of them had heard anything suggesting it yet, but they had both worried that one of the Diceans might see the marks as well, and might...object to the idea of Kaito touching him in that way.

But neither of them had ever had the courage to bring it up, and Kokichi was fairly good at keeping them under wraps anyway, so...

...so what was bothering Shuuichi?

...oh...

Oh!

Shuuichi might not have noticed at all if it weren't for the fact that Kokichi's skin was red from, probably, an overly hot shower but...there were little white lines on the prince’s neck. Not bruising, necessarily, but...a discoloring from the rest of his skin, like that part of his neck had been met with some friction...

Finger marks.

The marks would be less obvious once Kokichi's skin paled, but...hmmm… Shuuichi felt himself blush lightly, but honestly was ignoring that side of himself right now, genuinely concerned for his two friends. Hickeys were one thing, but if anyone noticed finger marks on the Dicean Prince, then both of the princes could face some embarrassment… Shuuichi didn't want to call attention to it, but he didn't want to just leave Kokichi to deal with it on his own either...hmmm...

"Kokichi?" Shuuichi said, with a kind smile, "Would you indulge me? While I was looking through my clothes, I found a checkered handkerchief that was meant to go with my suit for your wedding. It's a good quality, and when I saw it I thought it might suit you. Would it be alright if I put it on you to see?"

Kokichi just blinked for a moment, sussing out everything Shuuichi had said yes to, but the detective soon explained it all. "It wasn't too bad, honestly--you were mostly just kind of giggly? Said some freaky stuff about Maki-chan talking to some of the staff, but..." He shrugged. It was unlike Shuuichi from Kokichi's experience, but that was very limited. Despite the dark meaning, maybe it was something of an in-joke between the Luminary trio, to suggest that any problem no matter how small could be solved with extreme measures. It wasn't really the sort of joke Kokichi felt comfortable making, but he wasn't about to make this another big culture thing.

Nodding gratefully, Kokichi showed off the papers and materials in his arms. "Thanks! I'm gonna try to get some work done while they're doing their thing, but I thought it'd be nice for all of us to be there." Maybe he wouldn't be very efficient with his work, but Kokichi had really enjoyed talking with Shuuichi the last time he'd sat in on training.

"And, yeah. Maki-chan and Tim are at least gonna walk us there too, since she wanted to take Tim shopping for some stuff. Swimsuits, she mentioned." Kokichi tilted his head to the side a little, inadvertently exposing a little more of the finger marks. He wondered if he should mention he couldn't swim, but...well, he wasn't even going to buy a swimsuit, and he wasn't gonna go in any sort of water more than ankle-deep. It wasn't a big deal.

Kokichi paused, however, stiffening at Shuuichi's suggestion, some of the feelings from the night before resurfacing. Memories of people wanting to dress him up like a doll, the years before Denji had taken over the whole realm of fashion, had started to demand that any cooing adult go through them before laying a single hand on Kokichi... But Shuuichi wasn't like that.

With a tense, awkward smile, Kokichi nodded slowly. "Uh, sure? I mean...I can probably put it on myself, but...I'll try it on?"

...He had? Recommended Maki torture someone?

...Shuuichi shook the worry away. He felt better now. More in control of his new urges. He was under control. Everything was fine.

Shuuichi nodded, stepping aside to invite Kokichi in, leaving the door open behind them as he went to his closet, where the suit was hanging up. He didn't actually think the handkerchief was Kokichi's style, considering the prince loved his bright colors so much, but it would be large enough to completely cover his neck, which was the main point.

As Shuuichi dug it out, he said conversationally, "Swimsuits, huh? I heard there was a waterfall nearby; are we visiting?"

Ah, there it was. Taking out the handkerchief, Shuuichi brought it back to the prince, unraveling it and handing it over. "Around your neck. I think it'll look...quirky? Is maybe the word?" Shuuichi said with a shy laugh.

"Ah, shit!" He knew he was forgetting something--they'd only talked to Maki and Tim about the change in plans. He'd wanted to let Shuuichi know too once he joined them, but then he turned up drunk and... Kokichi sighed and accepted the handkerchief, tying it around his neck.

"Sorry, Shuu-chan, we were gonna tell you at dinner. We're putting off the Danganronpa trip--gonna go to the coast for a week in the meantime." He sent the detective a worried look, unsure if Shuuichi had heard anything about the situation himself. "There's this extremist group, the Remnants of Despair, that's been popping up everywhere. Big displays of murder-suicides."

Kokichi wrinkled his nose as he finished tying on the handkerchief, looking disgusted at the mention before the worried look on his face grew. "...and they targeted Kai-chan specifically. Found a lot of his ex's and made them write...gross stuff to him. I think just...to threaten that they could kill people close to him? I don't really know, but... It's too dangerous right now to leave the country."

"...people's lives are way more important than a little sightseeing..." Kokichi sighed softly, for a moment showing the weight and stress over the situation. Then he took another breath and stowed it away, looking back up at Shuuichi. "Sorry, just wanted to let you know what's goin' on. It'd put too many people in danger if me an' Kai-chan go anywhere near all that."

"...so? All that you'd hoped?" Another awkward smile as Kokichi gestured vaguely to the handkerchief...that felt pretty damn comfortable, actually.

Shuuichi stared at Kokichi.

"...For how long are we delaying the trip?" he asked.

Trying to be calm.

Kokichi shrugged a bit. "Until that group is taken care of? If they're still killing people and still have a plan to hurt Kai-chan and the people he cares about, it'd be pretty dumb to just...go to them and get people hurt or killed."

...

...

...fuck.

Shuuichi stared at Kokichi, just...trying to process this sudden new information. Trying to comprehend the actual ramifications for himself...for his friends...it was too much information at once. He was going to need to get it down in the journal. See it in ink to really...sort through it all...

...he was starting to feel panic broil in his gut...and with it, the extremely odd desire to laugh. Excited by the fear. Shuuichi's face went red, and he giggled.

"Well...all of that is something," he said as, briefly, a twisted smile curled itself around his face...before he took a small breath. Reminding himself that he was...completely in control. He just needed to stop to think. That was all. He couldn't freak out...e-even if it would feel good to do so. Not in front of Kokichi.

Remembering that he was trying to help the prince, Shuuichi looked Kokichi over, before going around behind him, taking the handkerchief and readjusting it, tightening it as well, before turning Kokichi around to assess again, making another small adjustment before saying almost absentmindedly, "Yes, that'll work. Alright. That's fine. Let's go down to the yard, yeah?"

Kokichi blinked slowly at Shuuichi, not really...sure what to think of that...disturbing smile on his face. It only lasted a moment so...maybe it was a muscle spasm or something? That didn't explain the giggle though, but...

Kokichi chewed on his lip, worried, and tried not to bat Shuuichi's hands away as he adjusted the handkerchief, feeling insecure and uncomfortable but...Shuuichi was just...being nice. Giving him a piece of clothing. ...and, come to mention it, Kokichi hadn't done anything to cover his neck today, so it was probably for the best.

So, adjusting his work materials in his arms, Kokichi gave the older boy a strained smile and nodded, taking a few steps out and expecting Shuuichi to join. "...yeah. They're probably well into things by now. Let's go."

As they descended the castle, Kokichi gave smiles to the early risers out and about, but kept quiet and to himself, now thankful that Shuuichi had given him the handkerchief. He...he really couldn't handle any knowing looks right now. It wasn't fair; he'd already broken down once about this, why couldn't he just be fine?! Kaito was horrified and ashamed at what he'd done and there wasn't any taking it back. It was over.

And yet still Kokichi just had to ignore the soft pains in his chest as he and Shuuichi walked into the courtyard.

The training session had, indeed, been going on for a good fifteen minutes by the time Shuuichi and Kokichi got down there, and the three were just doing a simple running exercise, running from one point of the field to the other in a certain style, such as side to side or, by a certain definition of 'running', lunges (bear claws were also usually a part of this, but with Kaito in mind, Maki had replaced it with high knees), and then after the specialty exercise was done, running around the entire marked out area, taking the turns as quickly as they could and using the long ends as a more steady breather before going again.

They had been at this, as stated, for about fifteen minutes, Maki originally just watching, keeping an eye out that Timothy, in particular, wasn't going to cheat...and getting more and more frustrated as she watched Kaito, before joining in the run, keeping pace with him as she said, "What are you doing?"

"W...wh-what do you mean?" Kaito huffed, doing the lunges as quickly as he could, his sling bouncing against his chest every now and again, a determined look on his face.

"I told you to take the exercise easy. We still have forty-five minutes left. Yet you're running like each lap is the last," Maki said, herself entirely unphased with his pace as she breathed easily, finishing the lunges before they got started at the first turn. "You're going to hurt yourself if you try to go like this the whole time."

"I...h-ooph...I'm fine!" Kaito said, giving her a confident grin and a wink as he said, red faced, "I got this! I'm just...full of energy right now! Gotta burn it off!"

Maki raised an eyebrow before, as they turned the corner, spotting Kokichi and Shuuichi, both men heading to a tree that Shuuichi enjoyed watching the training from. "Well, looks like Shuuichi's feeling alright. I'm gonna yell at him later about leaving to drink with strangers without telling anyone, by the way. I expect you to have my back on it."

"Huff...huff...g-got it!" Kaito said, glancing over at Kokichi and, brows furrowed, returning his focus on the run as he said, sounding almost...shy? "Is...is Kokichi watching?"

Maki narrowed her eyes at Kaito. "Too far away to tell...is he why you're acting like an idiot right now?"

"...HUFF...WHEEZE...d-don't know what you're talking about!" Kaito said, back to the middle field, running side steps now.

Kokichi glanced over to the trio exercising, feeling...complicated as he watched Kaito go at it. Fond, and a little annoyed at how...intensely the prince seemed to be doing things, and sort of amused at it too, and worried and... He shook his head at himself a little before plopping down beside Shuuichi and laying out the work he had to do.

He'd gotten all the information stuff done, so he just had to write back and relay that info. The excitement and promise to work country-wide on the statue, the suggestions for the troubling bird population...all that stuff. So, rolling his wrist around a few times, Kokichi got to work, letting himself be pulled into the state of focus his work needed.

Even if he glanced up at Kaito and Maki and Tim every now and then, seeing what they were up to, but that was pretty normal for him. Well. Not looking at them specifically, but looking up briefly. And he didn't let himself think too much of it.

Over time, the slight pain in his chest didn't fade, but the redness of his skin did, even if practically burning himself in the shower would probably make his skin more sensitive than usual, but...it didn't look like it was going to be a searingly sunny day. He'd be fine.

Shuuichi waved at Maki and Kaito for a moment before taking a seat with Kokichi, leaning against the bark, his hat low as, immediately, he took out the journal and started writing down what he now knew:

Trip canceled indefinitely. Half-jar DP=aprox 2 mo. Stretch with lower dose to 3? Unlikely + pointless. Withdrawals symptoms? Insuff ev, but body has immediate fight/flight reflex to even abstract concept of denial. Personal mental hiccup or actual physical reaction? Insuff ev, observer biased.

Shuuichi sighed. Hopefully Doctor Kimura's results would give him a clearer answer on what, if any, danger he was in trying to quit the pollen at this stage. Though...he had no idea really what she was looking for in her own research. She might end up doing whatever tests she was doing and just end up telling him everything he already knew: the pollen was poisonous, caused personality change and eventual permanent change in the body's chemical makeup, effects intense and lethal in high doses. He wondered if she'd find the positive things as well, such as his increased stamina and rapid healing time, not to mention he could feel, with literally no effort, his arms and legs starting to develop muscle definition...the stuff just made you stronger. Healthier.

...Crazy.

Shuuichi bit his lip and kept writing.

Hypothetical: DP Withdrawal not optional. ?? what then? No withdr + no trip = Beer only reliable source. Protect Beer group? no no no group is RoD, RoD...attack Kaito? Ex letters?? Insuf info, must question Kaito. Beer group targeting princes + me (blackmail?? they knew i was addicted already. how did they know???) + potentially Maki. Protect beer group (BG) results in endangering friends? danger=potential addiction?=bad??? (Evidence RoD targeting Kaito though. Worse consequence than addiction?). Unacceptable risk + insuf ev + observational bias - potential blackmail = I can't do this to them this will put them in danger.

Shuuichi furrowed his brow, looking at the last line, tapping at his journal...before writing in: So what do I do???

"...Kokichi?" Shuuichi said, still staring at the journal, "Have you ever had to sacrifice something important to yourself to protect others?"

-

"Alright, good job on the runs, you two. We're moving straight on into sit-ups. One hundred each, and if I'm not feeling tired by the time you're done, we'll do another hundred again," Maki said, ignoring Timothy's groans. She observed her charge's form for a moment, making sure he was doing it right, before going over and kneeling next to Kaito, having made him sit a bit of distance away from Timothy specifically so she could ask him, "Are you going to tell me what's wrong or is the next thing we all do one-handed pushups?"

"M-maki, that's...huff...that's not fair!" Kaito said, though he laughed as he said it, clearly trying to play off the obvious strain he was under trying to match the ridiculous pace he had set for himself. "T-torture doesn't work you know! Shuuichi told me so!"

"Then he's never tortured right," Maki said, a dark joke between them, but her tone was soft as she said, "Then don't make me torture you for information. I'm your friend, and you're worked up about something. Just talk to me."

Kaito continued doing sit-ups, huffing in and out...before pausing, breathing heavily and chuckling as he stared miserably at the sky. "Th-that's not fair either."

Maki smirked. "But it's working, right?" she said, before raising an eyebrow. "I'm not tired yet. Keep going."

"God, you're a tyrant," Kaito said, returning to his sit-ups but going slower now, the movement more smooth as he caught his breath, glancing over at the tree. Kokichi was deep in his letters, though Kaito saw him glance up slightly, and Kaito immediately averted his eyes as he said, "O-okay...but can we keep it between us?"

"Certainly. I'm extremely skilled at keeping secrets...as you already know," Maki said, settling in for the conversation. "So what's happening?"

Kaito stared at the sky as he did his sit-ups, sweat pouring down his face as he thought carefully about what he could say... "...huff...Kokichi doesn't like people knowing about his sex life, alright? So...nothing we talk about...phew...is in regards to that. O-okay?"

"Understood," Maki said, holding back rolling her eyes. She had just said she was keeping it secret. Honestly, the mental loopholes some people had to put themselves through. "So what are we talking about?"

"...Chad?" Kaito guessed, his brain slowly making the links between the two situations before, more confidently, he said, "Chad. I wanna talk about Chad. You remember him, right?"

Maki twitched. Her fists clenched involuntarily. "Ya know...somehow I do," she said darkly. "Are you finally going to send me to kill him?"

"...phew...come on, Maki, we've talked about this. He's a good guy, he's just...hah...kind of a dickhead sometimes. Like, by accident. Which is why I wanna talk about him!" Kaito said, warming up to the idea as he said, urgently, "Alright, so, dur-ah, fuck, hold on, let me...phew, okay. So during junior year, before everything that went down went down, let's say...that instead of me being your friend, your friend had been Chad? N-nothing else changes! You and Chad were just BFF's and I was just some guy he was dating. Okay?"

"I hate this scenario," Maki said plainly, looking heavily annoyed.

"Just pretend! Okay, okay...so Chad's confiding in you, says things are getting weird with me...that maybe he's pushing the limits a-and doesn't know, like...huffffff...how to get things back on track? What's your advice to him?"

"Mmmmm," Maki said, staring at Kaito as she said, deadpan, "If you don't want the heir apparent to have you arrested in front of the whole school and be almost executed, don't brag about Kaito getting gang-banged to the entire lacrosse team?"

"H-he wasn't bragging! He was worried about me! If you just listened to what they said he actually said, you'd- ugh! We're not having this fight again." Kaito growled, shaking his head in frustration as he said, "No, no, like...like back when we were just having three-ways and kept upping the ante until it got crazy. But he didn't want it to get any crazier? Like, we're three people in and the gangbang hasn't happened yet. What's your advice?"

"...are you having threesomes with Kokichi?" Maki asked, genuinely befuddled.

"We're not talking about Kokichi! Come ooooon, Maki, please? Just answer seriously?"

"Miss Harukawa! I finished a hundred!"

"Do I look tired?" Maki called back to Timothy, who just grumbled some curse words at her before starting again. As both her charges continued their sit-ups, Maki hummed to herself, thinking carefully...before saying, "I'd tell him...try a different way of fucking you."

"...huff...huff...what do you mean?" Kaito said, raising an eyebrow at her.

Maki sighed, rolling her eyes. "You guys got into a weird pattern of behavior that escalated into something dangerous, right? You and 'Chad', I mean. Change the pattern. Try something entirely different, that isn't even in the same football field as adding additional partners. If you find yourself repeating a move that you've done on each other before, force yourself to stop and think of something different. Breaks your habit, things stop escalating, nothing becomes dangerous," Maki explained, quieting as she watched what could generously be called Kaito's 'thinking' face appear, his brow furrowed as he seemed to stare at nothing, still doing sit-ups mindlessly.

After a while he said. "...that...could work? Actually??"

"Why do you sound surprised? Don't ask me for advice and then sound surprised when it's actually good," Maki scolded, crossing her arms over her chest as she said, "Is that it? You going to stop trying to kill yourself during extremely basic training?"

Kaito, still mulling over the advice...suddenly collapsed, lying in the dirt as he huffed and puffed, catching his breath as he said, "...Yeah. Okay. Thanks Maki-Roll. I don't know what I'd do without you."

"Be dead, undoubtedly," Maki said, before saying loudly to both of them, "I'm tired of this! Back to runs!"

Both charges got up and quickly started running.

Kokichi looked up from his work, blinking at Shuuichi before an...uncomfortable expression crossed his face. Kaito hadn't put Shuuichi up to this, had he? If he'd showered in Shuuichi's room that morning, then...would he have confided in his friend? Well, if he had, what was the point? No matter who asked, he would give them an answer befitting such a serious question...if he could.

Putting his work to the side, Kokichi brought his hands into his lap and leaned back against the tree, looking up at the sky. "...maybe? I think how you might want an answer isn't best answered by me since...I think the most important thing to me is protecting others. And when it's come into conflict with other things that were important to me, it's always won out."

He sighed softly, chewing on his lip for a moment before...well, Shuuichi was a detective. He'd already known about all his health stuff--probably nothing would be news.

"When my d--" he quickly corrected the slip-up, "when my nanny told me he was going to war...it wasn't my choice at all. I didn't want him to go, but...he said he was going to protect me. More than just Dicea, he was going to fight in the war to protect me. It still hurt, but...I think I understand him more now."

His expression twisted into something begrudging. "And...I think, knowing you guys and learning about Luminary...I can understand Aiichi more. He never wanted to send our people to war, and while I still think there was something he could've done when things were first getting tense to avoid it...I think he chose to give the okay to fight in order to protect Dicea. From how everyone speaks about how Luminary is run...if they invaded...our people would've been slaughtered. If not right out, then through social negligence." Kokichi's expression was tight, watching Kaito do sit-ups in the distance with something hurt in his eyes. It would hurt Kaito too much to tell him that like he was telling Shuuichi; it already hurt him too much whenever they strayed even close to the subject. But that is what he believed.

"So...in order to protect the people we've sworn to protect...he put us in a war, and didn't back down. Aiichi couldn't force our people into that situation, but...we had enough people who saw things the same way that we could fight back." The sacrifice that all their militia members made...could not be taken lightly. It was one of the strongest, most terrible things any Dicean could do in order to protect them all. ...he had to do more to try and make it up to them...

Thoughts already going dark, Kokichi pressed his hands together anxiously, averting his eyes from Kaito. "...when I was a kid and someone came to kill me...even when I was really little I knew that, if I messed up, it'd cost me my life. But it was more important to me to help the person sent to kill me. To know why they were there and fix whatever had happened. That's...always what I was taught. How we run Dicea, because if someone does something bad, then it's because they're in a situation that forces them to do that. Or they're pathological and need psychiatric help."

He shook his head--getting off track. "What I mean is... Even if I died...it was more important to me to be able to help even one person suffering in front of me. So...I think Shuu-chan needs to ask that to someone that values things above helping others. If our values aren't the same, then nothing I say will ever be applicable to you."

Unclasping his hands, Kokichi played with a few blades of grass under him for a moment, pink creeping into his cheeks. "...if any of that makes sense. Sorry."

Shuuichi glanced up from his journal, over to Kokichi, his gaze a little sad. He had known, at least in passing, some of the things Kokichi was talking about (after all, it wasn't just the prince he had been tasked with the process of vetting. Shuuichi had spent several days when both of the princes had been bedridden still working vetting jobs for the secretaries...yes, even between the interrogations...), though thankfully he had been spared a lot of the more difficult to read details about the many, many prior offenders currently working at the castle. He had kept all that information to himself because, unless asked, he didn't feel comfortable spreading it to Kaito and Maki, not when so many of the stories seemed to directly link to Kokichi himself.

But, one theme he had gotten from the few detailed accounts he had read, was that the younger Kokichi had often ended up just talking to his attackers. Sometimes in...unfortunate situations, in immediate danger, but the young leader had managed to get through before things became irreversible. The prince was exceptionally skilled at empathetic communication, intelligent persuasion, and perhaps the best weapon at his disposal, an entire lack of self-preservation instincts, to the point where it had, as far as Shuuichi could tell from the reports, been incredibly disarming to everyone sent to kill him.

It was impressive.

...and not something Shuuichi could relate to, unfortunately.

Shuuichi had spent his whole life choosing his own comfort and safety over others. It had been rare for him to use his position and abilities to protect someone in need over the desires of someone who could hurt Shuuichi. Even when it came to his friends...

This was different from that, certainly. His addiction and desire to appease it wasn't at the same caliber as trying to resist life-long mental conditioning training...but he still found the decision almost impossible, put in front of him.

So...unfortunately, no. Not helpful.

But Shuuichi smiled anyway, giving his friend a sympathetic look as he said, "That all sounds really hard, honestly...I don't think I could do what you do. But...it makes me happy to think there are people like you out there, Kokichi."

And then Shuuichi scoffed, shaking his head., "Yeah, the royal family would have absolutely destroyed this place. If not the whole kingdom, then at the very least everyone in the capital. I can't even remember how many times I listened to the king rant about burning everything and everyone here down, just to prove a point. Your nanny was correct. The Momotas, and people like them...they're a reality I'm more familiar with," Shuuichi said with a shrug.

Kokichi offered a small, strained smile back to Shuuichi. Though...he wanted to ask if Shuuichi really was happy that Kokichi was like this. Because...all it seemed to do was frighten and anger Kaito.

It wasn't a bad thing, to value your own life. It was a pretty important thing, actually, and Kokichi had talked to many people about it who were struggling with it themselves. But...in dire situations, when someone else was on the brink...it was hard for him to put himself over them. In his darker moments, like that day he'd hidden in the closet...all he could think about was the impossibility of valuing something that only brought other people pain. It was hard to remember in the moment that that wasn't what he did, but...that was just something he needed to work on.

Heaving a heavy sigh, the ache in his chest pinging, Kokichi brought his knees up to his chest and rested his chin on them with a grimace. "I can't believe people like that exist...it's disgusting... But I have to acknowledge it. Choosing to disregard them is only leaving people at risk by being blindsided. I just wish they'd left us alone, though..."

Tilting his head, Kokichi regarded Shuuichi for a moment. "For Kai-chan's sake, I am trying to see the good things about his family and the structures in Luminary, but... Are things really...?" After a moment, he perked himself and waved his hands frantically. "You don't have to answer that!! Shuu-chan can just talk about whatever he wants to as he pleases!"

Shuuichi chuckled weakly, already feeling relieved as his vision stopped doing the 'tunneling' thing that usually warned Shuuichi things were about to get difficult, putting a hand on his chest as he said weakly, "Th-thanks, Kokichi."

Man, if there was anything he wished the despair pollen helped with, it was definitely that.

As he took a deep breath, he said, "That's...that'll stop happening, someday. I promise. It took a long time with Kaito and Maki...and honestly it still happens with them sometimes too. I don't know. It'll happen less and you won't have to watch your wording as much in the future, is all I'm saying. Eventually."

He took another, steadying breath...and then said, "There are good things?"

At least he'd caught it this time. Really, it was just something for him to get used to--Kokichi would rather just alter the way he spoke to Shuuichi than hope for the day his...conditioning...stopped triggering. God. Conditioning. Kokichi had a feeling that Kaito was just trying to placate him by saying that maybe Byakuya would abolish the program--the torture of Luminary citizens--but...he still hoped there was some chance it would happen.

...though that hope shrank at Shuuichi's answer, his face visibly falling.

The justification he'd repeated to himself over and over... "...the reason people haven't rebelled is because those who do are killed, isn't it."

The pain in his chest increased, joined by an emotional ache. He wanted so badly to believe in Kaito's love for his home, but...he couldn't even passively support the torture and extortion and murder of people. For any reason, but for...greed? For feeling powerful? Abject disgust roiled under the sympathy but...

Kokichi clenched his eyes shut and hid his face in his knees, trying to calm down though he was shaking a little. There was nothing he could do. Trying to invade Luminary would just get people killed. Byakuya already had his mind made up about him and certainly wouldn't listen to anything that wouldn't make him more money. All those people, an entire country's worth of people suffering...and he couldn't do a thing.

Fuck he was pissed.

Shuuichi nodded, looking curiously at Kokichi, taking passive enjoyment in how...angry he looked. The detective wondered, even if he hadn't been dosed right now, if maybe he still would have taken some pleasure in Kokichi's reaction; after all, there was nothing quite as therapeutic as ranting about something you hated with someone ready to passionately agree with you.

So, closing his journal, Shuuichi smiled lightly, watching his friends move onto squats and jumps, Timothy loudly complaining now as Maki yelled at him. "Rebels are killed, yes. But it doesn't stop there. Their families are targeted. Nieces and nephews, ripped from their parents’ arms, who sometimes only find out their siblings joined a resistance movement only moments before they themselves are arrested, their children put into the program and sold before their parents can even go to trial. Those kids end up becoming...assassins and detectives and military conscripts, and are given new names so they can never be found by anyone who would go looking for them."

Shuuichi closed his eyes, leaning against the tree, enjoying the scent of it. It...really was a nice day out.

"Once, I believe when I was...seven, maybe? I heard of a town where a pocket of resistance leaders had managed to organize a headquarters, sending relief and information to groups around the kingdom? My mentor found out about them through a few loose-lipped people who likely never left the places they were sent to answer questions. Anyway, the Guard couldn't find the headquarters exactly, they only knew which town it was in. So, the Guard put up a blockade around the town and declared there'd be no traffic in or out until the rebels were all produced for trial and execution...the town lasted three weeks before food started to run out. The townsfolk found the headquarters, dragged who they could out of it, and for the rest who had barricaded themselves inside, they set on fire and left to die."

Shuuichi opened his eyes, looking over at Kokichi. Looking tired and sad and still smiling, slightly. An old hurt competing with changing chemicals. "So...yes. People don't rebel because they would die. And I never had any devotion training. Neither did Maki. It gets in the way of our jobs...so no. Neither of us have any love for our old home, if that's what you were wondering. We love some people in it. Maki's brothers and sisters. Our old friends. Our mentors. Kaito," Shuuichi said, looking over at the Luminary Prince for a moment...before shaking his head. "But the Momota family are nightmare people, and the kingdom they've designed deserves to burn."

And it was with that word, that Shuuichi realized...he knew what he wanted to do.

Kokichi felt his eyes burn as Shuuichi talked, explaining exactly what sort of place Luminary was. The power of a nation rested in its people, but if those people couldn't organize, were killed and punished to the greatest degree, threatened into not even trying...

He couldn't understand. How could the Momotas live with themselves?!?! He couldn't understand how there could be a person that existed that wouldn't be heart-wrenchingly distraught at causing so much pain and suffering. How?!

Kokichi sniffled quietly into his knees, hot, angry, sorrowful tears escaping his eyes as his heart thumped painfully in his chest. This wasn't just a culture difference of people valuing physical prowess or hierarchy. This was abuse and...genocide on a grand scale.

And...brainwashing? More than what happened to Maki and Shuuichi, if... Devotion training? If Kaito... If that was why...

There needed to be a change. Letting people suffer just wasn't something Kokichi was able to let happen. But he couldn't do anything, and, though rightfully furious, the thought of Luminary burning... So many people who had nothing to do with...

Kokichi felt his body all of a sudden go lax, and he realized through the emotional pain that he couldn't breathe, that his heart, the organ, was in agony. Trying to gasp a breath as he slumped to the side, he tried to get Shuuichi's attention.

"Sh...ca..."

Shuuichi looked over at Kokichi, startled by the sudden gasping noise, realizing with some surprise that he had fallen over, was reaching out to him. The prince was turning red...but the parts underneath his eyes were turning blue-ish?

Shuuichi watched this curiously. His cheeks flushing red.

Was the prince having some sort of heart attack? What, over a few stories? That was...incredibly cute. Leaning over, still in no hurry...almost feeling hypnotized by the sight of his companion just suddenly...dying? Next to him? Out of sheer sadness?? Shuuichi put his hand against Kokichi's neck, under the handkerchief, checking his pulse. It was ramping up, but would probably flatline soon if Shuuichi didn't hurry and get him to medical help.

"...heh."

Shuuichi giggled lightly, eyes wide, a small smile on his face as his cheeks flushed harder, excited by this. Kokichi was dying because he was sad. By something Shuuichi himself had said. That was just...wow. Wow.

He rubbed his thumb affectionately against the prince's pulse. "Guess we better get you to a healer, huh?" Shuuichi said, giggling again, before saying seriously, "Hold on, Kokichi, I've got you. They'll be faster anyway."

Looking up to Maki and Kaito, straightening his expression, he shouted as loud as he could, "MAKI! KAITO!"

The two looked over at him, curiously, though Kaito started running full speed the second his eyes hit them, before Shuuichi could even finish.

"KOKICHI'S COLLAPSED!"

-

I'm coming, I'm coming, I'm coming, Atua please, I'M COMING!

But as much of a head start as he had, Maki zoomed past him, taking Kokichi from Shuuichi's arms, who had started picking up Kokichi in preparation for them arriving. Kaito felt both intense relief and total panic as Maki took his weight and immediately started moving, faster than either he, Shuuichi, or Timothy who was coming up behind them could move, Kaito still being the closest behind her as they ran to the medical wing.

When they got there, Maki kicked open the door, her face murderous, her hair flying as she screamed at everyone inside,"SAVE HIM OR I'LL KILL ALL OF YOU!!"

Kaito, coming up right behind her, said a little more helpfully, "Prince Kokichi just collapsed maybe two minutes ago! Please help him!" Kaito, his heart pounding, put a hand on Maki's shoulder so she wouldn't accidentally lash out at anyone who came to collect Kokichi while her protective instincts were clashing with her desire to solve problems by killing them. "Please!"

...now, Kokichi was never really in a coherent state of mind whenever his body started to give out on him. When it happened from stress, well, he was already distressed, and that was never a good state to be in to get reliable information. But somewhere under the panic of his body going into a fail state, Kokichi was...confused and afraid. Because Shuuichi looked...just like...

Kokichi barely registered Kaito and Maki running over before his eyes rolled back.

Everyone in the main medical bay jumped at the door bursting open, but they didn't hesitate to leap into action at seeing--and being screamed at that--their prince limp and motionless, his face red while the more delicate bits of skin were turning blue, his chest barely moving. Unfortunately, this wasn't the first time they'd seen this, even though the assassin was a new part.

Someone collected the small prince and laid him down, everyone moving in a practiced flurry of movement. Removing extraneous clothing, attaching a device that would measure his pulse here, someone performing light chest compressions there, a relatively new assistant practically running to retrieve the prince's medicine, thankful that they had some already mixed up. While having a diluted amount in tea helped him on the recovery, right after stabilization he would need a concentrated amount.

And it didn't get to be administered for...a concerningly long time, it probably seemed like to the Luminaries. It was long enough for word to reach other parts of the castle, long enough for Aiichi to come by, staying out of the medical bay but peering in with a worried, pained expression for as long as he could before a staff member came by with a message, and the leader left with a somber expression, giving his son one last look before he left.

After that far too long time, Kokichi's pulse seemed to be...relatively steady, and his breathing, which he was doing on his own, was weak and shaky, but assuredly going in and out. The healer that had helped the princes out times before approached the Luminaries with a serious expression. "Prince Kaito, if you wouldn't mind, we're going to bring Prince Kokichi to your room. We'll have someone watch him so you don't need to be there, but Kokichi's vitals need to be constantly monitored. He hasn't had an attack this bad in a while--may I know what happened?"

"Don't have to be there?" Kaito said, exhausted and tense from hours of waiting for news, just sitting in the corner, trying to be entirely out of the way as he waited for assurance that his husband wasn't going to die, watching that MOTHERFUCKER WALK AWAY?? When it looked like he was finally stabilizing.

His voice was shaking, fury nipping at him as he stared at the healer incredulously, asking, "Why the fuck woULDN'T I BE TH-"

This time it was Maki's turn to grab Kaito, pulling him back and whispering urgently to him, Kaito looking at her with open fury as Shuuichi stepped up, looking nervously at the healer as he explained. "Kokichi was sitting with me under the tree in the yard, talking about something that I believe upset him. I guess he got over-excited? I called for help as soon as I could..."

Kaito's whole body tensed, his hands shaking as he looked over at Shuuichi, listening to his explanation. Had...had Kokichi been talking about...

Fuck, oh god, oh god, Kaito had almost killed him again...fuck, fuck, please, Atua, please...

"Will we be in the way, watching over him as well?" Maki asked, trying to be the responsible one for Kaito, having sent Timothy up to his room and just...feeling just as tense and angry as he was, but trying to keep it together for once on his behalf.

The healer, at this point, having dealt with the Luminary Prince more than they ever thought they'd have to, just sighed tiredly at his anger. "That's not what I meant, Kaito. I'm telling all of you, that you don't have to literally watch over Kokichi 24/7 until he recovers--we have people that can monitor him too."

They looked over Shuuichi for a moment before nodding. That did happen, time to time. Not Kokichi's fault, of course--anyone would be distraught learning that someone they'd tried to help killed themself, or had tried to kill themself, or that their parental figure was going to war, or being told that he shouldn't expect to live past 15... It just didn't help that things that would knock anyone on their ass emotionally just did that to Kokichi physically too.

"No, you won't be in the way--we'd keep him in the bay if you would. If you think you can monitor him--like you did last time, Kaito--then there doesn't need to be other personnel around at all. I am just informing you of the option," they phrased pointedly, looking at the group, "that if you all need to step away for whatever reason, then there will be people to look after him. And I hope that you'll make use of that to sleep and eat."

With another sigh, they walked towards the unconscious prince, holding an arm out to the Luminary group. "If it would ease you, you can carry him up. I'll bring up his medicine."

Kaito immediately moved forward, but Maki grabbed him with a small sigh. "Kaito, your arm. I've got him."

Kaito could do nothing, and couldn't bring himself to speak, just nodding as Maki walked past him, picking up Kokichi bridal style and immediately heading upstairs, Kaito and Shuuichi at her heels.

As they walked, it was Shuuichi who said, "So, what are we thinking? Eight hour shifts?"

"I'm not leaving him," Kaito muttered, not willing to yell at his friends, but still wanting to fight someone.

"You won't have to. It's still morning. Kaito, you'll have the morning shift, 0800 to 1500. Shuuichi, you take 1500 to 2200, and I'll do 2200 to 0800. That way, if Kaito wants to, he can take a break in the afternoon, but can always sleep at night without leaving Kokichi, and me and Shuuichi can get rest during our times off. Agreed?"

"Are you sure you want the midnight shift, Maki?" Shuuichi asked, glancing over at her. "I don't mind. I wouldn't fall asleep."

"Of course you wouldn't, but if there's an emergency and it's harder to find help, I'm faster than you. So it makes sense to be me," Maki said, "Plus, I can train Timothy when my shift is done, then sleep till it starts. I've thought it through."

"Thank you, Maki," Kaito whispered, his eyes stinging red. "If you...if you hadn't been there..."

"Then you or Shuuichi would have gotten him to a healer five seconds later. Don't beat yourself up Kaito. He's going to be fine. Everything is fine."

The three got up to the room, putting Kokichi to bed. Thinking of the need to be alert for their upcoming shifts, both the detective and the assassin assured Kaito they were just down the hall, and if he shouted out the door, they'd hear and come running. Kaito just nodded, taking the, unfortunately familiar, position of grabbing the desk chair and sitting in it next to the bed. Keeping an eye on Kokichi as the healer set everything up.

There were a few moments over the next few hours where Kokichi's pulse would dip, or he'd stop breathing for a moment, but probably thankfully for Kaito's heart, everything evened out without intervention. The healer came back twice more to tend to the ailing prince, once to attach the pulse monitor so the Luminaries wouldn't have to check it by hand, and another time to administer another dose of his medicine.

And on Kokichi slept, tucked into blankets to try and help him conserve heat, laid against his pillows just as he liked. Pale and sickly and looking so fragile... The castle was quieter than usual that day. Aiichi had been called away to talk to someone that had gone raging in town, and while the staff attended to the castle and community, there was an old, shared worry between them all. A deep protective desire that would go unfulfilled. They couldn't protect their prince from his own body.

It wasn't until night fell that Kokichi stirred at all, just the slightest change in his breathing, some movement under his eyelids as he struggled to open them. He was so tired...but there was something important he had to tell his friends... What was it? What was...?

Just barely Kokichi gave a soft huff, his eyes opening a sliver.

Maki considered him. She thought briefly of keeping quiet, allowing Kokichi to fall back asleep. Rest was what he needed, was essentially what the healers had said. Well, rest and that tea stuff...maybe it would be worth it to help him rouse for that at least.

Glancing over at Kaito, who was half asleep on the bed, half in the window seat, his good arm reaching out to keep a hand with Kokichi, his bad arm sprawled beside him in a way that had worried Maki, but...well, he'd need the rest too. He had been a mess all day, rapidly shifting between nervous, to angry, to tears, trying to explain something to Maki (likely something to do with the 'Chad' conversation) but stopping himself over and over again, pacing the room, clearly losing it and not sure what to do about it. It had been a relief when he had finally passed out.

So...yes. Leave Kaito asleep. At least make some effort to feed Kokichi the tea.

Deciding all this in an instant, Maki got up from the desk chair, pouring some of the tea into a cup and bringing it over to him, sitting at his bedside as, with an uncharacteristic gentleness in her touch, she pushed the hair out of Kokichi eyes, saying softly, "It's Maki, Kokichi. You're safe. Everything is okay."

Maki...Maki was good. Well. She was a killer but...in Dicea, she was good. His friend. If she was around...things would be okay...

He let out a soft breath, eyes fluttering before opening just the slightest bit more. ...were things okay? He couldn't... He felt a warmth on his hand, jarring to how freezing he felt. Kokichi could see a blur of red in the corner of his vision, by where his hand was. Kaito. His fingers twitched slightly before he turned the scant amount of focus he had back to Maki.

"...hap...pend?" he softly whispered, the question seeming like it took the greatest amount of effort from him. And it sort of did. But Kokichi...he was so confused... He blinked sluggishly up at Maki, hoping that she could...at least give him enough to go on to peacefully rest. Something told him that solving his confusion wouldn't be of much help to him, though.

"You got upset over something while Kaito and I were training with Timothy," Maki explained, wondering how on earth she was going to convince him to sit up and drink this tea. She supposed she could just move him. It probably wouldn't hurt...and if it did, it wouldn't be for long, and then he could rest again. Get better faster. "Shuuichi wouldn't say what it was. Said he didn't want to violate your privacy like that."

Placing the tea on Kokichi's nightstand, she started adjusting some pillows around him, focused on action.

"I know you're barely awake. That's okay. We're going to sit you up for a little bit, put some tea inside of you. If you want anything for the next time you wake up, now's the time to tell me, I'll have it ready."

He got upset... Of course. Because it wasn't enough for him to have any normal injuries, no. Stupid, worthless Kokichi Momota Ouma would be stuck in bed because he got upset. Those thoughts aside, he wasn't actually upset or angry at the moment--he didn't have the energy to be anything but tired.

However, Kokichi's lips moved as though he was repeating Shuuichi's name, his eyes closing for a moment before he forced them open again. He...was talking with Shuuichi... And... Something was wrong?

"...some...thing...wrong...Shuu-ch..." ...he didn't know. He was too tired to speak, to think, to feel. All Kokichi wanted was to go to sleep. Well. He wanted his friends to be okay, but that was a kind of ever-present feeling. For focused needs, he just wanted to sleep.

But, alas, tea.

His fingers twitched around Kaito's again, his body remembering his feelings even if he didn't at the moment, and he breathed out a, "...kay..." as Maki pulled him into a sitting position. Drink tea, then sleep, then...figure things out. Once his brain got working again.

"No, he's fine. Nothing happened to him when you fell, other than you giving him a scare," Maki reassured the prince, getting to work.

"...you're actually freezing," Maki realized with a frown as she put her arms around him, lifting him firmly and swiftly into a sitting position, not wasting time, as she very much wanted to send him back to sleep. Kaito, whose hand was pulled from Kokichi's in this moment, grumbled something in his sleep, but didn't wake.

Carefully, being patient that he could only sip a little at a time and cleaning up his mouth when he dribbled or coughed, Maki fed Kokichi the tea, thinking. The healers hadn't said anything about his body temperature, other than telling them that he ought to stay bundled as well as he could...so it was probably fine...

...but honestly, the healers had felt a little complacent to her. There was a danger in routine. It was how guards got lazy, assassins snuck in, and people died. Just the assumption that if you go through the motions without actually paying attention, everything would work out like it always has before, because it always has before.

So, when the tea was finished, even though she...honestly didn't really know much of anything about when it came to healing people, Maki made a gut instinct decision as she helped Kokichi lie back down and said, "Kaito. Kaito, wake up. Sleep in the bed with your damn husband."

"...nrrrgh?" Kaito murmured, looking up at his name being called, confused. "...'Kichi?"

Not wanting to deal with him becoming emotional at seeing his husband, like...kiiind of awake, she narrowed her eyes at him and said, a tad viciously, "Get under the covers now and sleep with Kokichi."

Kaito, through years of physical training with her, reacted quickly to that tone of voice, moving mindlessly into the bed, looking Kokichi over worriedly as he said, "Is he-"

"Go back to sleep, Kaito, don't keep him up. I'll wake you for your shift in the morning," Maki instructed. Going back to the desk.

Kaito, too tired and confused and frazzled to hesitate, scooted over to Kokichi and put his arm around him, drawing him close and sharing his body heat, feeling the frigid chill of his small body. "'Kichi..." Kaito sighed, resting his head on the pillow, "'m so sorry..."

"No talking," Maki said sternly, not wanting to be present for whatever...'thing' was going on between these two that Kaito refused to specify. "Sleep. Now."

It'd been long enough since his last bout that Kokichi didn't mind the taste of the tea...or, he wouldn't if he could taste it at all. He wasn't sure if he was just too out of it or what, but that was a more-lucid-Kokichi kind of question, not a barely-even-a-person-Kokichi one. But he was slightly aware enough to be thankful for how Maki fed it to him, making sure he wouldn't choke or drown--he knew it was a particular detail the castle healers impressed on whoever was watching him.

Kokichi didn't like being manhandled, but it was something necessary while he was like this since he was barely able to move his body at all. Even after he'd recovered enough to be aware of what was going on around him, and even when he was able to speak full sentences, he wasn't able to sit up by himself. It took a good amount of recovery before he could even shift himself in bed. For using the bathroom or being cleaned, to taking his medicine or trying to eat anything, he needed someone else to practically do everything.

...Kaito had seen him like this before. Maki and...and Shuuichi believed in him too. They wouldn't...lose that after this...right?

Kokichi's eyes fluttered closed as Kaito pulled him close--when had he gotten into bed...?--the warmth radiating off his husband starting to pull him back under, and Kokichi barely murmured something resembling Kaito's name before he succumbed and fell back asleep.

It was otherwise a relatively calm night after Kokichi fell back asleep. When it was the Luminary Prince’s shift, Maki woke him up fifteen minutes to eight, giving Kaito a chance to pull away from Kokichi for a while and get in a shower and brush his teeth before letting him take over for the morning. As she had said she would, she immediately went to go collect Timothy, fully intending to keep up his training, going on with her day.

Kaito sat up in the bed and stared at Kokichi, who was still laid out next to him, for awhile before he realized he couldn't just sit and stare at Kokichi the whole time, going to retrieve his book from the nightstand and making a few half-hearted attempts to start reading, before just letting the book rest in his lap, staring at Kokichi again. Kaito ran his thumb across Kokichi's forehead and felt nervous at how cold he still was, glancing up at the pulse machine, which assured Kaito that Kokichi was still...ya know. Alive. Though his pulse seemed...really slow to Kaito...

There was a knock at the door. "So...room service?" Hajime called through, his tone only mildly sarcastic as he clarified, "It's Hajime, Kaito. Can I come in or...??"

"Go ahead, Hajime," Kaito called back, feeling grateful to the housekeeper. The healers kept coming in randomly and quickly, and the Luminary trio, or at least Maki and Kaito, kept tensing every time someone just 'appeared', their already frazzled nerves not being helped by the random stranger invading what was their 'safe space' for Kokichi to heal.

Maki kept waiting for someone to try to take advantage of Kokichi's weakened state to fulfill a hit, and unable to vet the healers herself, hadn't discounted any of them as potential assassins or opportunistic rebels.

Kaito was just worried someone was going to come in and make him leave at some point.

Kaito was slowly convincing himself that everyone had to know that it was Kaito's fault that Kokichi was in this state. That the king had to know. The healers would have told him, all the stress Kaito had put Kokichi's body under the night before. It...it had to have been obvious, right?? Everyone had to know.

...it didn't matter. Kaito just had to focus on watching over Kokichi right now. Everything else could come later.

Hajime opened the door, holding a tray of food, looking over at Kokichi with a small, concerned frown before putting the tray down on the desk. "Some solid food for you, Prince Kaito, and the kitchen sent up some broth for Kokichi if he's awake long enough today to get some of it down. You need anything else?"

Kaito couldn't think of anything, so he shook his head. "No. Thanks, Hajime."

Hajime shrugged, now looking over at Kokichi again, as he asked, "So...what happened this time? He collapsed while he was out training with you all?"

Kaito quickly shook his head. "No, no. He was just watching us train. I don't...I don't know what happened," Kaito lied. Shuuichi had refused to explain what they were talking about, saying he didn't know if Kokichi would want people to know what had the ability to upset him that much, but Kaito was still pretty sure he knew what it was. "Thanks again."

Recognizing the dismissal for what it was, Hajime headed out, calling back that he'd be back in a few hours to collect the tray.

Kaito sighed. Just so tired...maybe when Shuuichi came in for his shift, Kaito would go back to sleeping with Kokichi and just rest for the rest of the day.

-

Shuuichi, in turn, was using his free morning to head into town. He didn't...have a plan yet. He had a goal, but even that goal was so obviously too big and impossible for him that Shuuichi found himself baffled every time he thought about it. Certainly he couldn't actually...how?

But as impossible as the goal felt, Shuuichi couldn't let go of the idea that...he was looking at a puzzle, and that...it was a mess. And there were probably pieces missing. Some pieces would have to be invented for the puzzle, even...but...

...he felt like he had a corner piece.

A start.

So, with that feeling in mind, he headed to the pharmacy.

When Shuuichi would enter the pharmacy, it would look very much like the last two times he'd gone in--empty. But, while Seiko rarely spent her business hours idle, the lab in the backroom of the pharmacy was absolutely frantic with her energy.

Despair Pollen was absolutely fascinating, holding properties of all sorts of chemicals, the sort of stuff you'd normally need to combine a handful of other drugs to replicate. Most of it wasn't helpful, of course, but the parts that were... Seiko felt like she could study the substance for years, though the single sleepless night she'd had gave her incredible insight.

Hearing Togami, no, Saihara--she had no idea what that was all about, but she definitely understood being nervous--call out to her like he had the previous two days, Seiko managed not to knock over any of her equipment as she hurried to the counter.

"Mr. Saihara, good morning!" The pharmacist certainly looked like she'd pulled an all-nighter, though the excitement in her eyes brought the energy back to her form. "I-if you'd like, please come to the back," she gestured to a door off to the side.

"Hello, Dr. Kimura," Shuuichi greeted with a small smile.

Adjusting his hat slightly as he took in the now somewhat familiar sight of the woman sort of...falling all over herself, a manic sort of energy to her that was extremely strange with the near constant look of exhaustion in her eyes as he nodded. "Please, thank you. You seem...upbeat," he noted, heading to the door.

Shuuichi had given her two pinch-worthy doses of the Despair Pollen, while stressing to her that he hadn't been certain he could get her more if she used them up. Though, by this point, he found he'd be willing to give her more of what he had available if it offered more results, now that he was aware of the brewery, and had...sort of decided to lean into its availability. It still filled him with a sense of panic, the knowledge that he would eventually run out of his own stash, but at least he wasn't facing completely going cold turkey in the near future, so long as Itch and his gang didn't do anything that made Shuuichi change his mind.

...god, he hoped they wouldn't.

Seiko nodded a bit with a soft, sheepish laugh. "Ah, well, it's not every day I get to study something like this. Just from general accounts it's easy to tell that this pollen is a particular substance, but when you really get into it..." She shook her head with some excitement. "It's truly one of a kind."

Knowing how dangerous Despair Pollen was from the start, Seiko had kept the pollen in airtight containers, taking extreme precautions when she handled it. All the test dishes laid out were properly sealed and moved away from easy access or accident spaces. Looking around for a moment, Seiko pulled over a rolling desk chair for Shuuichi to sit in if he so desired.

"First of all," she sighed lightly, "There isn't a practical medical use for Despair Pollen on its own. The benefits of it are heavily outweighed by the negatives, so for it to be of use in your work, further research needs to be done to see if parts of the compound can be neutralized or isolated--that's not something I can answer for you in a day."

"However, there are several effects that warrant medical research, and so Despair Pollen isn't just to be relegated as a poison." And that was why it was just! So exciting?! Even if the benefits found in Despair Pollen couldn't be used, they would still inspire ideas to replicate the benefits with other substances. What she could make from that knowledge...

Seiko's eyes went starry for a moment before she remembered herself, giving Shuuichi a sheepish look. "So, um... Anyway. As you know, i-if you read the accounts of Despair Pollen in the castle library, it's a poison that causes the body's internal temperature to rise. It doesn't take much to provoke that reaction, and a lethal dose is actually quite low...the LD50 is only .06 grams... But it has an array of other effects that show up even with a dose that doesn't provoke a fever."

"On the beneficial side, it promotes accelerated healing, an increased metabolic rate, promotes muscle growth, and...well, it's debatable if these are beneficial, but in the right circumstances..." she shrugged slightly, "It slightly dampens pain receptors and increases libido and promotes the growth of sexual organs and genitalia, but well..."

Seiko sighed, frustrated. That's where things got difficult. "It's not just that it increases libido. Despair Pollen is highly addictive, though...there are signs that it wouldn't affect the entire population that way. Some people will have intolerances and would stop being affected by it after a few times taking a low dose, and others will have a lethal reaction even from a little bit, since, and I haven't been able to run as many tests as I'd like, but since it, generally, increases the activity of cells, anyone with chronic or persistent illnesses or injuries would have their afflictions ramped up too, and...likely to a lethal end..."

She trailed off. Apart from the other concerning effects, unless you knew with absolute certainty that someone didn't have any persistent conditions, taking Despair Pollen would kill them.

"...ah, sorry, where was I...?" But that was getting off track. "Part of the reason Despair Pollen is so addictive, is that...well...plainly, it pretty much turns people into nymphomaniacs. The pollen changes the chemical responses of serotonin and reward endorphins, linking them to sexual gratification, and...over time..." ...this was the other really concerning part. "It links all that to stressors. Anything that would cause someone distress becomes linked to happiness, which is linked to arousal. So, over time...people who have had their makeup changed by Despair Pollen would be constantly seeking sexual stimulus, which would only be found in distressing situations."

"...personally, I believe that the reports of personality changes resulting from pollen ingestion is the body's way of doing everything it can to seek out stressors. Considering that many of the reports claim that people turn violent or helpless or sadistic..."

Seiko sighed, giving Shuuichi a concerned look. "So...until the pollen can be proven to be safely synthesized, or only the benefits of it replicated, it would be far too detrimental to use in a medical setting."

Hmmm...that...

That all explained a lot.

Shuuichi had thought that maybe his increased sex drive was just a factor of his own, unique personality change; after all, he had been asexual before all of this had started. Since his best guess for the personality changes he saw seeing the caravans be effected was that it was just...them but opposite, it had seemed logical to him that his desire to fuck, just....everyone, all the time...was just his personality mirroring itself.

It was actually kind of a relief, knowing that was just a thing that was going to happen to everyone, rather than just him.

...stressors...was that why he found Kaito in particular so difficult to not fantasize about? Kaito was...Shuuichi loved him, dearly. But that love had often resulted in him being, just, constantly worried about the prince, in a way he hadn't ever had to be for Maki, who always seemed in control and capable of taking care of herself. Due to his, as Shuuichi had called it before, 'all or nothing' personality, Kaito was constantly going through extreme highs and terrible lows, and Shuuichi had spent a good portion of his life, just...trying to ensure his best friend would get through whatever the latest 'thing' was in relatively one piece. So, yes...Kaito was absolutely a source of stress in Shuuichi's life...

...as was now his husband, Prince Kokichi.

Shuuichi's brow furrowed. He had to talk to Itch. While the group hadn't specifically said anything about it yesterday, he had gotten the impression from the questions concerning Prince Kokichi that the group was highly interested in bringing him into RoD. Getting him addicted...but Kokichi had a whole laundry list of chronic illnesses that would get triggered by the pollen. It would kill him, probably his first round even. Shuuichi couldn't allow that to happen to him...

...what about...everyone else that was going to be infected who wouldn't be able to survive the initial dose? If Shuuichi really was going to lean into the group's ideals, at least when it concerned places that really did deserve to go extinct...what about the people who would die without the joy the poison would provide them in their final moments? Unable to have that merciful ending the plan was based around?

...

...so?

...what about them?

Shuuichi suddenly giggled, and then coughed into his hand, trying to push his excitement down. Who the fuck cared about those people, though...really? Kokichi. Shuuichi would protect Kokichi from the poison's effect, at least. But everyone else who would die terrible, painful, frightening deaths?

Fuck ‘em. They were going to die anyway.

"This all sounds amazing, Dr. Kimura," Shuuichi said, giving the doctor a true look of admiration. It was astounding she had managed to find this all out in such a short time. Truly incredible. "When I had first discovered some of the pollen's effects, I did think there was a chance that the benefits were worth looking into...it's actually really humbling to hear from an actual professional that my idea wasn't totally insane...ha!" Shuuichi suddenly giggled, lowering his cap. "Sexual growth? Like...after puberty? Is that possible? Sorry, I know out of everything that's the wrong thing to focus on. I just thought it was funny."

Seiko sent the young man a look. As far as she knew, the benefits of Despair Pollen hadn't been recorded anywhere outside of Danganronpa, so... But, if Shuuichi had access to the pollen and had started to study it on his own before coming to her...it made sense he would try some experimenting of his own.

"...Mr. Saihara, please be careful. I-I know I gave you precautions before, but the pollen truly is dangerous. It is in no way stable enough for use in...well, any way that isn't a poison." She sighed a bit, hoping that the young man wouldn't let curiosity become his downfall. It was common in Dicea for people to let their passions consume them--it led to amazing things happening, but it was dangerous.

Not entirely surprised that the young man would be interested in the sexual side effects, the doctor nodded. "It's very possible, even outside of the context of Despair Pollen. Some people have second puberties naturally, and others provoke them, generally in the context of changing their secondary characteristics. Others may experience slight growth as they age, just as some experience dysfunctions. In the case of the pollen, it encourages growth and sensitivity, and, likely because of the mania it provokes, people affected would stimulate themselves more often, which can also lead to growth."

She sent him another look, more exasperated. "...if...that is interesting to you, there are medicines that encourage organ and genital growth, as well as arousal, without everything else associated with Despair Pollen. Until it is further studied, I will urge this again, Despair Pollen is not an avenue for any sort of medical purpose."

Shuuichi laughed this time, shaking his head. "No, no, please, I'm sorry to give the wrong impression, Dr. Kimura. I wouldn't do something so reckless for an issue so superficial," he said, entirely honest.

He just thought it was a delightful side effect to the clusterfuck that he had already made of himself.

Then he continued on with a bold-faced lie of, "I really am just doing all this as a thought exercise. If I sound flippant and unconcerned, it's only because this experiment holds no real world risks. I'm sorry to alarm you," Shuuichi said, giving her a shy, patient smile. "And for asking such an immature question. I think I was just looking for a small laugh. It's been a stressful few days over at the castle. I'm one of the ones tasked with looking after Prince Kokichi right now, and he...wasn't doing well yesterday."

Shuuichi studied her expression, smiling wider as he said, "You know, I've had the opportunity to read his medical journal due to my position? Can I say, just on personal opinion and third party observation of the prince...the report you generated for him was extremely competent. I think he would have really benefited from more work with you growing up, i-if I could be so bold."

...she hoped so. Thoughts did often lead to action, and this action...would lead to a lot of people being hurt, if not many deaths as well.

Seiko's worry deflated further as the young man--one of the prince's caretakers now, apparently (and, fuck the prince was 20 now, was Aiichi still treating him like a toddler?!)--spoke on the situation at the castle. She'd heard that the prince had been in town the other day, officially, but...well, he would still have to contend with his health.

Nodding slowly, Seiko gave Shuuichi a kind, thankful look. "Thank you--I wish I could've helped him more, but...apparently my help wasn't needed." Or appreciated. She'd been dismissed from Prince Kokichi's case, something only a few healers in the country had been. Because, she'd heard through the gossip mill, one had taken so much blood that the prince had been bedridden for two months, another had told the prince he only had a year left to live and then had tried to convince the boss that they knew of a promising young girl that would be a perfect heir, another still had tried conditioning the prince out of his emotions, thankfully being caught after the first time they'd slapped Prince Kokichi, though apparently the prince had been quite distraught for some time after that...

While Seiko hadn't had her license revoked or had to go through training again, had the boss's blessings with her pharmacy...being associated with such people wasn't...something that really helped public opinion any.

It was shitty and unfair, but what bothered Seiko the most, was that, for sticking to her convictions, she was unable to help the prince in any way. And she knew that her advice hadn't been implemented in any way. Seiko usually stayed to the fringes of festivals, but it was easy to see that the prince was always alone. Isolated even among crowds of people. She couldn't even begin to guess at how his mental state had been damaged throughout the years from Aiichi's obsession with keeping him "safe".

Seiko sighed quietly. "You said he was unwell, and I shouldn't ask, but...how is he? Generally."

Shuuichi considered the question carefully. Kokichi had wanted to see this woman before everything that had happened, happened, and Shuuichi...felt sort of bad how it had all gone down. As much as he felt bad about anything, right now. He had analyzed the memory of yesterday morning now, and had noticed that when Kokichi had asked, he had sounded almost shy in doing so...so, maybe a way to make up for Shuuichi basically taking open delight in Kokichi's pain was to prep the good doctor for talking to him again.

Sure, that was probably a good enough sort of amends. Plus, it was fun seeing that small line of stress in her forehead at the subject.

So, choosing his words carefully, but being entirely honest... "Entirely off the board, personal opinion? ...He's a little emotionally stunted. It's sometimes hard to remember that I'm talking to an adult. He seems to go back and forth between acting his age to acting ten on a dime, and I'm not entirely certain he has any control over it," Shuuichi said.

With a small shrug. "He lashes out when frustrated, has a dependency on childhood comforts, and has an idealistic view on the world that borders on storybook fantasy...but maybe that's just the cynic in me," Shuuichi admitted with a sad smile. "He's also extremely intelligent, hardworking, has a strong sense of responsibility, can be very brave when he wants to be...sorry, you're in the medical field. I'm certain that's not what you were asking about. If you mean medically...if his medical journal is anything to go by...he hasn't gotten any better since you last knew him."

...that was about as much as she'd suspected, looking in from afar. From how Aiichi kept his son so isolated that some people in town doubted he really existed, apart from his appearances at festivals... If Prince Kokichi had been under the same restrictions as he had when she still went to the castle, it was no surprise that he would've struggled to emotionally mature any. He had no peers that were not either in an imbalanced power position, were a decade older than him at the least, or had tried to kill him at some point.

How was he supposed to grow if he was alone? How was he supposed to grow if he was never allowed to do anything?

While the child she had examined was incredibly bright, Kokichi had been slow with social skills, his emotional competency, even his motor skills... His health had prevented him as a toddler from exploring, and then his father had prevented it as he grew. While frightened, Seiko remembered the prince as, past what came naturally to others that he didn't have, simply being determined to experiment, which could have caught him up...if he'd been able to do so. Instead he'd been stopped at every turn, which, as she'd said in her report, was likely to train the prince into just...never trying anything at all.

It at least was nice to hear that it hadn't consumed him. She knew the prince did everything he could in small ways, even if it wasn't enough to make up for the blocks in his development. The young man was trying so hard and yet...

Damnit! If only she could've stayed around, worked on a medicine that could do more than just stop him from dying...

Realizing she had been quiet for a long moment, Seiko blinked back up at Shuuichi and gave him a grateful look. "A-ah, thank you, Mr. Saihara... If...it wouldn't be too much trouble, could you pass on my wishes for his recovery? I'm not sure if the prince really would remember me...but my hopes remain the same."

Shuuichi gave her a purposefully curious look. "Oh, he remembers you. He's mentioned you by name very recently. Uh...but I'll still pass on your wishes, of course! As soon as he's coherent again," Shuuichi promised, a small blush flushing across his cheeks as he remembered that Kokichi was home and, essentially, helpless right now...that was a fun thought...

...he...he absolutely should not have doubled his dose this morning.

He wasn't sure what had possessed him. He had just woken up...frustrated, this morning. No longer doubled up on both the effects of the beer and his own pollen. And when he had taken his usual dose, he had just...found himself longing for more.

So he had taken just another little pinch and...maaaaan...he felt amazing.

"Anyway, you've been incredibly helpful, Dr...may I call you Seiko? Sorry, I was raised to be extremely polite, but those manners don't really...translate very often, here. I really have to try to become more comfortable just using people's first names...anyway. Thank you so much for your help. Is it alright if I continue to check in with you for potential further research? Your input so far has been invaluable...oh! Could I ask, as another thought experiment...I know that certain substances have different kinds of withdrawal symptoms. If you had to guess what it would take to cure someone of Despair Pollen addiction?"

Seiko blinked, not having expected that in the slightest. The prince...remembered her? She couldn't imagine why... Especially compared to some of the other healers that had seen to the prince, their time together had been pretty uneventful. And short. Maybe someone had told him that she was the one to create his medicine? That might be enough to get his attention...

"O-oh, yes, you may...Shuuichi? And, yes! Of course. I never would've been able to get this knowledge at all without you enlisting my help and with your connections." Even if she hadn't been able to help the prince, she was still able to help others...and that was the point of a healer. Indulging the curiosity of a caretaker was honestly nothing to the information finally being able to analyze Despair Pollen would bring. She would be happy to tell Shuuichi anything she found.

Especially when he clearly had a sharp mind for pharmaceuticals himself. Seiko hummed softly, considering the question. "...I believe that is a more difficult guess to make than you'd think. Since withdrawal is a stressor, I believe that someone addicted to the pollen would find the withdrawals rather pleasurable until their brain started to fix the connections between pain and pleasure."

"To fully cure someone?" She paused, thinking. "Rehab and therapy would be invaluable, as with all addiction...having the connections between what they actually find calming and pleasurable reinforced without any access to pollen, I mean. I...would think treatments for depression would actually work quite well, now that I think about it... Sunlight, exercise, balanced meals, positive relationships, along with antidepressants if they were struggling more."

"...that's my guess right now, anyway. That's certainly something to think on," she hummed.

Shuuichi's brow furrowed, the first genuine look of confusion and...an actual, rare spark of anger...why would she...

He wasn't going to go to therapy.

Never. Never. Why would he...why would he put himself through...

The detective felt a spike of excitement at the anger, the fear, the dark memories...and bit the inside of his lip. Turning himself away from it. No. No way. He was never doing therapy again. No more conversion therapy. Never. He was a full citizen now! No one could make him!!

Fuck, the nerve that she would even...

...and honestly the rest of that stuff just sounded...really boring.

More conditioning, along with a laundry list of things that just sounded dull...no. He could handle the addiction. It was just a matter of managing it. So long as he kept treating his friends well, and kept himself safe, and worked towards his brand new, terrifying, exciting goals...he was fine. He was great!

He'd cope.

Shuuichi buried the anger at the suggestion, smiling at the doctor. "Th-that does sound a little complicated...I think it's probably apparent, based on my occupation and my questions, that my knowledge base is limited. This is all just a bit of a burning curiosity for me. Thank you so much for your patience with my questions, Seiko. Please reach out to me if you need anything. I'll visit again soon. Maybe I'll even have the prince with me! Anyway, I have to go. Have a good day then!"

And with a wave, he left.

Seiko waved the caretaker off, offering him a gentle smile that he'd only be able to see in her eyes, but it was apparent enough. "Have a good day, Shuuichi. Take care of yourself."

The prince coming to see her...ha. Maybe someday.

Kokichi stirred slightly from his sleep, his breath coming in a little heavier before his eyes cracked open, blearily looking around. He felt...cold and numb, except for the pain in his chest. Probably time for his next dose then...

Having to focus on his breathing, Kokichi tried to be a little more aware of his surroundings, softly humming to try and get the attention of whoever it was taking care of him this time.

Kaito had eaten breakfast and then made another attempt to read. After a few hours, he had actually managed to get back into the story, glancing up at Kokichi every few pages to make sure his husband was still, ya know...breathing and stuff before going back to see what the hard-boiled detective was going to find in this latest chapter. The crime boss and adoptive father of the femme-fatale love interest was still missing, but the crime wasn't really about him anymore, but was more about trying to work out who was trying to take over the criminal underworld...

Kaito had, halfway through the book, finally realized what the twist was. Every character was, objectively...a bad guy.

It was actually fascinating, once he realized it, and he was tempted to restart the book with this new knowledge in mind, that none of the characters introduced so far were traditional heroes, even though they were being written in a traditional style. The detective was corrupt, and was working for three different factions now, with no loyalty to any of them besides being paid. The love interest was concerned about her father, but only in the sense of the position it would put her in if he died. Even the swordsman, looking after his daughter, while living a half decent life now, every chapter that revealed more of his history showed a horrifying and, perhaps, unforgivable ex-con whose main job was, apparently, punishing deserters and traitors...and their families...

...some parts of the book were really hard to read, actually.

Then lunch had come and gone, and it was now roughly one in the afternoon, with a fresh bowl of broth brought up and a warmed kettle when Kokichi's little movements and sounds suddenly became more punctuated, Kaito looking up with a spark of hope. Kokichi?

Putting the book aside, Kaito quickly went to his husband's side, looking him over and putting a hand to his cheek, gently running his thumb over his cheekbone as he said, "'Kichi? It's me, babe. You awake?" Kaito asked, before putting a small kiss against his husband's forehead.

...Kaito? Was...he looking after him? That...that was right. The Luminaries, his friends, had, presumably, rushed him to a healer when he'd...he'd collapsed. Kokichi blinked slowly until his husband came into focus, feeling the warmth of gentle touches against his chilled skin. ...he'd probably worried Kaito sick...

Attempting a soft smile, Kokichi regarded his husband with guilt and affection before drawing in a slightly deeper breath to try to talk. "...K...Kai-chan?" There it was. His voice wasn't totally gone. That was good.

"...h...how long was...I...?" He had to stop to breathe, the pain in his chest too much for anything but the most important questions--at least for now. "...tea?"

The medicine would help. It'd make him sleepy, and at this point he really did just need to sleep, but...he'd hold out as long as he could, both to reassure and comfort Kaito and...to get some questions answered. But Kaito was the more important of the two, hands down.

Kaito grinned wide, thrilled to hear him sound coherent. Maki said he had spoken a little last night when she had sent him into bed to act as a heater, but that he had been barely coherent...okay. Okay. "Tea? Sure. Coming right up, boss. Just hold tight."

Placing another kiss gently on Kokichi's forehead, Kaito hurried to go get the tea, pouring a cup and bringing it to the nightstand, placing it down and, slower and much more gently than Maki had done it last night (but also, frankly, far more practiced at maneuvering Kokichi then she was), shifting Kokichi into a slight sitting up position.

As he started the process of feeding Kokichi, whispering to him, "Hey, if you can stay awake long enough, Hajime brought up some broth, too. I-it'd be good if you ate." Every move during the process was an agonizing fight between wanting to leave lingering, comforting touches and a fear of...maybe giving Kokichi the wrong message with lingering touches. So he tried to keep touching gently, but briefly, and as he fed him his tea, said, "You've only been out a day, 'Kichi. And there's no hurry to be up any time soon, okay? Me, Maki, and Shuuichi got you, okay? Th-the healers, too, said they'd come in and look after you, if you needed anything more. If we're not doing a good job, you can tell us, okay? We'll get more experienced help. We just wanted to...it's fine, either way. You just let us know."

Kaito said this all as a ramble, just...still worried that Kokichi might not actually be entirely comfortable with him. He just didn't want to...ya know...force his attention on Kokichi.

Kokichi knew it didn't actually do anything, but seeing that smile made him feel better already. People always just...looked so distraught whenever he was sick. Even if he knew Kaito was worried, seeing him smile, as if he was excited to see him, was a great comfort.

Slowly drinking down the tea with Kaito's help, Kokichi had to mostly focus on that, letting Kaito's words just wash over him without much thought over them. So, as Kaito took the cup back, he just offered his husband a smile that was a little more sure than his last one. "'m happy you're here...Maki and...Shuuichi too... Sorry for..." All this. Everything. Being sick.

But despite all that, Kaito was there. "...love you..." Kokichi breathed, eyes drooping for a moment before he woke himself back up.

"Stop apologizing for things that aren't your fault," Kaito muttered, watching Kokichi's drooping eyes and biting his lip a little. Just a little bit of the broth. He could at least try to get something filling inside of Kokichi, and if his husband fell asleep in the middle, well, at least he had something nourishing in him. "L-love you too, babe. Just...stay with me a little, longer, okay? Let's try to do the broth."

Going to retrieve it real quick, he started the same process as with the tea, feeding Kokichi in careful, small spoonfuls, checking Kokchi's eyes each time he gave him another sip, trying not to accidentally try to feed him if he was asleep.

He talked a little mindlessly as he did so, filling the silence. "Shuuichi has next shift, and then Maki after that, but I don't really plan to go anywhere. The most I'll be gone is down to the postal room real quick, just to drop off some letters. I'll be there and back. I'll pick up any letters for you. Maybe, when you're feeling better, I can help you work. Like I was going to when your wrist was hurting..."

He could've sworn he'd said something similar to Kaito before...heh. If nothing else...he was sorry for worrying everyone. The last times he'd gotten sick, the Luminaries had been rather...preoccupied, so seeing him like this was probably scarier than how it was for everyone else. It was still awful, but...with how often he fell ill, some of the shock had most definitely worn off.

Kokichi hummed softly, giving his assent to trying to eat the broth. Thankfully his stomach didn't tend to rebel--he just was usually too tired to have an appetite, so that often led to him just not eating. ...ah...that was probably where the whole 'malnutrition' thing came from, huh. It was hard to be nourished if you just didn't eat.

He felt a little bad that the Luminaries were taking shifts to watch him, but...that was their own decisions. They were choosing to do this...he wasn't forcing them... So instead of apologizing again, Kokichi just murmured between spoonfuls, "...thank you...don' wan' Kai t' go far..."

...that was...not what he meant to say, and way more bratty than he wanted but...it was true. His memories right before he'd collapsed were...hazy, but Kokichi could recognize enough to know that something didn't feel right. So, without any other information...he just wanted Kaito nearby. Because his husband was the kind to make things right.

Kokichi gave him another smile at the offer to help him work, a memory prodding at him. "...did...someone get my work...from...from the yard?" ...he'd been working before, he remembered. He wouldn't be able to finish anything in a timely manner so it'd have to be finished by someone else, but at least they could use what he'd started.

After not too long, Kokichi's blinks got slower, eyes staying closed more often than not, though he was making an effort to stay awake.

"Shuuichi picked it up," Kaito assured him. "I put them with the abomination. Ha. I don't know why my first instinct with letters is to put them next to that freaky vibrator. Just seems like a safe place for them," Kaito said cheerfully, more than a little relieved that Kokichi had actually managed to get a good portion of the broth down.

Cleaning him up and putting the bowl away, Kaito put Kokichi gently on his back again, kissing him on the cheek this time. "Thank you for staying awake. You can go back to sleep now, babe. I'm not gonna leave you," he promised.

"Needs t' get done...ask 'deki?" If nothing else, he could at least make sure of that. Even if he was unable to do anything, he could make sure the Dicean people would get the help they needed. Time and life didn't stop just because he was sick.

Humming softly, Kokichi allowed his eyes to remain shut the next time they closed, not having the energy to stay up for much longer even if Kaito hadn't given him the go-ahead. However, after Kaito had settled him on his back, Kokichi flipped one of his hands over, a subtle, wordless request to hold hands, even if he wouldn't be aware of it for much longer.

As long as Kaito was there...it'd be okay.

"I'll bring it to him," Kaito promised, taking Kokichi's hand and kissing him on his pinky. Patient and present.

Kaito started working on his letters when his husband fell asleep, the letters all short and to the point, Kaito too exhausted to put any more time than he had to into them. He reminded his brother that everything was fine and he was fine and that he was happy and fell just short of begging him to not do anything...frightening. Not that he would! His brother was just reactive. It was totally understandable. Kaito had no reason to be afraid of his brother, and he wasn't, who loved him, in his own ways. He just wanted him to...be calm. Was all. For everyone's benefit.

Then he asked Byakuya to check in on a list of names...leaving out Chad's name.

Then he had written a message to baby gangster, and this one was lighter in tone, thanking him for the letter and assuring him Prince Kokichi was a good guy who didn't need weird, covert threats. He also asked his old high school enemy to check on the list of names, being more open about the issue, since they knew some people in common. RoD had threatened them, and Kaito just wanted to make sure nothing had come of it.

His letter to Kaede was similar to the one to Fuyuhiko, though he allowed himself to be a bit more honest in his writing about how worried he was for them, and how any help she could offer would be appreciated.

By the time Shuuichi came for his shift, all the letters were sealed and addressed. "I'll only be gone for a little bit. Twenty minutes, tops. He's had his tea and eaten, like, maybe three hours ago, so I think even if he wakes up, it's probably okay to let him fall back asleep without either...I think. Okay?" Kaito told the detective, glancing nervously over at his husband as he said so.

Shuuichi nodded, smiling warmly. "Relax, Kaito, it's okay. I've got him if something does happen, and nothing's going to happen in the next twenty minutes. Okay? You can trust me."

Kaito gave his best friend a relieved grin. "Sorry, sorry. He just...he asked me not to go, ya know? I mean, not, like, in a way that makes me think he wouldn't want me even doing this, but...I'll be back soon, okay? I know you got him!"

Shuuichi nodded, giving Kaito a small wave as he left.

Twenty minutes, huh?

It had been a real good day for Shuuichi. A real good day. He had gotten more information about the despair pollen, and afterwards, he had gone to visit Itch again. Sat down with him.

Had a beer.

The two had talked at length. Shuuichi trying to understand what the Remnants of Despair actually was more, and what Itch, Tom, and Aba themselves were hoping to accomplish. He had listened to them talk, quiet and polite and observing, and picked at the 'Luminary' thread once it was provided, and...

Itch and Tom, at least...hated Luminary.

It was actually an almost baffling amount of hatred, for two Diceans who had lived in the capital, far away from the frontlines, their whole lives. But they hated the whole kingdom. And Shuuichi, carefully, patiently, picked at this. Not pushing too hard. Just...gaining information for future conversations he wanted to have with them.

Then, eventually, the trio had told them what, exactly, they were hoping to get out of him...and Shuuichi gently refused.

"...I don't think you understand us," Itch had said, his voice...even. Calm. His eyes almost disappointed more than anything. "We're not asking you. Getting Prince Kokichi on Despair Pollen would be a huge foothold to spreading the message. We're not leaving this up to you."

"All you'd manage to do is kill him," Shuuichi had explained with a smile, a blush, and a shrug. "I'm actually shocked you don't know that. Despair Pollen would kill someone like Kokichi."

And the detective had gone on to explain what he knew to them...and Itch, to his credit, responded only with, "I have my own sources. We'll run that by him and get it verified. You better not be trying to fuck with us."

And then Shuuichi had left.

A liiiiittle tipsy. On, what was it now...triple his usual dose? Ha ha ha. Oooooh...he hoped he hadn't overdone it. His own pinches were extremely light, and while Itch wouldn't tell him about it, Shuuichi had gotten the sense that the beer itself was mixed with its own stabilizing medicine and light doses to support drinking lots of the beer in one setting. But considering how deadly an overdose was...not to mention how Shuuichi would be found out...

...it was all so exciting!

Awwwww...look.

There was Kokichi.

Shuuichi went to Kokichi's bedside, kneeling down beside it and crossing his arms under his chin, staring at Kokichi with a small smile. Look at him...all sick and...helpless...heh heh...and who had made him that way?

Shuuichi and sad stories.

So...so cute...

Shuuichi felt his face turn red, and stuck out his tongue a little, biting it as he looked longingly at the small prince. ...he shouldn't. He really shouldn't. It was an unnecessary risk, and also, soooo mean. It'd be so mean to both of his friends...such a betrayal of trust...

Shuuichi's stomach flipped with excitement.

...well...if he was going to do it, he had to decide to do it now. Who knew when Kaito was coming back, or what he'd do once he was. Maybe if he was sleeping, but...nah, even that was a bigger risk than this.

...ah, what could just a little hurt?

Smirking, Shuuichi stood up, leaning over, and taking Kokichi's face in his hands...and leaned in for a kiss. Guts roiling in excitement.

His lips were soft. Wow, they were soft. And small. Shuuichi sucked slightly at Kokichi's lower lip, tasting his breath, which was warm and shallow. Heh. If Kaito walked in right now...Shuuichi blushed harder, sticking out his tongue lightly and grazing the Dicean Prince's bottom lip. Excited and flustered.

Especially right after an attack, Kokichi slept waaaay more than he was awake. While he'd rouse every few hours, it was rare for him to be coherent for more than maybe two or three of the times. When it was more than him just fainting, when there was the danger of his heart or lungs stopping, as had been the situation in the courtyard the day before, that state of constant sleep would last for several days, Kokichi perhaps not being coherent for an entire day at times.

That was all to explain that, since Kokichi had been awake and able to speak with Kaito, for him to properly wake so soon was extremely unlikely.

Whatever sort of luck someone would think it was, they'd have to admit that it was something very interesting that Kokichi's eyes fluttered open once again.

He'd felt something warm and firm against his lips, and already that sent warning signals to somewhere Kokichi wasn't able to access at the moment. However, as he opened his eyes, felt something warm and wet touch along his lips, saw a head of blue and wide, golden eyes on a flushed face...

"AGAAAAAA--aauh-- huuhh..."

The scream was earsplitting, though brief, Kokichi's lungs not able to supply the air needed for an extended cry, his heart unable to support the absolute flood of panic and fear, and almost immediately the prince's eyes fell shut, a trickle of blood starting to drip out of his nose while a faint stench of urine was added to the smell of the room.

And the pulse readout on the machine went wild.

Kaito hadn't even made it fully down the second set of stairs yet. He had literally just left...

He bolted back, his letters also squashed in the grip of his fist, his heart pounding as he ran back up as fast as he could.

Outside of his door stood Timothy, with a blade in his hand and a frightened, frozen look on his face. Clearly also responding to the scream, but still trying to decide if he was willing to go into the room where a sudden, brief scream had occurred. He looked visibly relieved when he saw the Luminary Prince, saying quickly, "Th-there was a screa-"

Just as Kaito started to open the door, Shuuichi ran out, a wide, frightened look on his face, Kokichi in his arms, practically running into Kaito, looking up to him in semi panic as he said quickly, "Come on!"

Kaito followed, his heart roaring in his chest, looking at Kokichi who, fuck, his nose was bleeding, and...did he wet himself!? "What happened!?" Kaito asked, "I was gone five minutes!"

"I-I don't know!" Shuuichi stuttered, staring at the stairwell to carefully run down the stairs as quickly as he could, both of them ignoring the worried calls of servants who saw them running with the prince. "H-he started squirming and saying something in his sleep, and I went to go check to see if he was waking up, he took one look at me a-and just screamed!"

Kaito's teeth grit, grinding the letters in his hands. Another nightmare. Like the one that had sent Kokichi into the bathroom vomiting. Fuck. Fuck! His husband just couldn't get a fucking break.

As they made their way to medical, with almost the same urgency they had yesterday, but less death threats, Kaito relayed what had happened to the healers as Shuuichi put Kokichi down where they instructed. Taking several steps backwards, standing with Kaito as, once again, they stood by and waited, worried and frightened...

"Fuck, fuck, I shouldn't have left him," Kaito murmured, clutching his shirt, guilt racking through him as he said, "Fuck, god, I'm so stupid."

"I...I don't k-know if there was anything you could have done, K-kaito," Shuuichi said, still trying to breathe through his own startlement, "I-it seemed to come out of nowhere...h-has this happened before?"

Kaito took a shaky breath...before admitting, "Yeah...something like it. Once...fuck."

...oh.

Well, that made things convenient, Shuuichi thought.

Now, the attack yesterday had been bad. One of the worst Kokichi’d had in years. While having multiple attacks in a bout wasn't something that had never happened before...it never had with such potency. Usually if Kokichi collapsed from stress, sleep kept him from worrying too much, and by the time he was lucid, the problem was solved as much as it could be. A doctor outed as a malicious liar, a letter outlining how much Kokichi was loved.

Having multiple awful things happen on top of each other just...didn't happen. Not with how strictly Aiichi demanded people act around his sickly son.

The healers once again jumped into action, doing everything they could to stabilize the prince's vitals which were all going out of wack. They had a dying young man on their hands, so no one really thought much of it, but...for the healer that had found themself much more involved with the princes than they had ever thought, there was something that stuck in the back of their mind as they manually kept Kokichi's heart beating.

He shouldn't have been able to dream.

It took hours. Longer than the last time, since Kokichi's body had somehow managed to freak out despite the medicine already being in his system. Again Aiichi came to stand in the doorway, out of the healers' ways, disbelief and worry and sadness in his expression. Along with a hard resolve.

Ko was an adult now, yes. He was growing up, and Aiichi was so proud of him. But his tiny, weak, fragile son was inches from death for the second time in as many days. It didn't matter how mature Ko had gotten if his body was still too weak to support him.

As some of the healers drew a privacy screen around the prince, finally getting him to a point they could clean him up, the boss spoke to a few healers off to the side before reluctantly leaving, his duties not able to be put off any longer--it was late at night as it was.

Finally, that same healer went up to the Luminaries again, looking like they could collapse in a bed themselves. "He'll make it. The boss wants a healer at his side at all times, though you can still be there. He's staying in the bay tonight."

Kaito nodded, frazzled and actually shaking with relief. This one...this one had taken so much longer. Maki had eventually come back from wherever she was and found them in the med bay, and the three, once again, had found themselves sitting together, worried and frightened and, in the case of Kaito, guilt-ridden.

"Y-yeah...that makes sense. Thank you..." Kaito murmured, all fight and fire entirely out of him this time, just looking...frightened and overwhelmed. He turned from the healer, towards his friends, took a deep breath, and said, "...i-it's alright now, you guys. There's nothing more you can do right now. W-why don't you head to bed?"

Shuuichi frowned, looking miserable and tired as he said, "I can't believe this happened on my watch..."

"No, no, you literally just got there Shuuichi, this isn't your fault," Kaito assured him, pressing his knuckles into his chest, worrying and bending them as his brow furrowed. "I...this...w-we just have to remember that...sometimes Kokichi just...he gets sick, you know? I-it's not anyone's fault...seriously guys, I'll stay here with him, b-but I don't want you guys having to sleep on a chair or whatever. H-he's okay...right?"

Maki nodded, her face blank. An effort to be controlled and composed in her sheer frustration at this situation. "Yes, you're right. It's okay, Kaito. Are you sure you don't want me to stay, at least? To watch over you both?"

Kaito shook his head, giving her a grateful smile, "No, no, these people...it's fine. No one here wants to hurt him. It's fine, Maki. I'm gonna go to him now, okay? Everything's fine."

"Well, give me those letters you've been hanging onto all day, anyway. I'll go deliver them for you," Maki instructed, putting out her hand.

Kaito gave her another grateful grin, shakily handing her the almost entirely ruined mail. "Th-thanks, Maki. I'll see you guys tomorrow."

Both of his sidekicks nodded their heads, giving him one last worried glance before leaving the med-bay.

Kaito went to go sit at Kokichi's side, just...tired and feeling like a fucking failure. Day ONE of trying to look after his husband, and a fucking nightmare...how did you...how did you fight something like that? Kokichi literally threw himself into a near deadly frenzy in his sleep, how...how...

...how could...Kaito protect him from something like that on the road??

Kaito looked over at Kokichi, frown deep, tired and frightened and...just...feeling hopeless...

Kokichi slept through the night, and through the morning where they moved him back up to the princes' room, the mattress cleaned and sheets and blankets replaced with new ones. He slept through various healers either trying to make themselves invisible as they watched over him, or trying to offer their sympathy to Kaito. He slept through Lake and Denji sneaking in once they saw Kaito briefly leave to set a vase of bright chrysanthemums on his nightstand.

Kokichi slept through everything, until mid-morning a whole day later, the healer on duty jumping up at the slightest change in his vitals. And, with weak breaths, Kokichi fluttered his eyes open, wondering one thing.

Where was Kaito?

Kaito was in a chair at his bedside, fast asleep.

He hadn't wanted to be. He had fought sleep tooth and nail this last day, and finally his body had started trying to force the issue, catching him off guard and nodding him off randomly, Kaito just blinking one second and suddenly the seemingly endless line of healers was a new person, nervously introducing themselves to the famously temperamental Luminary Prince...who simply gave them nervous, grateful nods before returning to watch Kokichi.

But though he was asleep, drooling into his chest, he was disturbed by the sound of the healer moving quickly and a change in the tempo of the beeping noise, and he woke up with a spark of fear in his chest, 'No, no, he's dying again...'.

...but he wasn't. The beeping wasn't that fast. Just faster. And the healer looked concerned, but not desperate. So Kaito forced the sleep from his eyes and looked over at his husband, who was- "Oh, thank god," Kaito whispered, reminding himself that he needed to bloodlet soon, to praise Atua for getting Kokichi to open his eyes, thank you, thank you, he opened his eyes... "Kokichi? Hey, is...is it alright for me to touch him?" Kaito asked the healer nervously.

"Let him adjust for a moment, then it should be alright," the healer said, making a promise to themself to protect the prince should the Luminary explode at that.

Kokichi blinked slowly, taking in his surroundings, reorienting himself in reality. He was in his room...that beeping was? He wasn't sure...but...he was sick, wasn't he? He remembered looking over blueprints of a new machine Iruma had made, something that could monitor a pulse...

He was sick. He remembered Kaito giving him tea...talking about his work?

"Prince Kokichi, I'm going to touch your forehead, alright?"

He looked over at the voice, recognizing...oh...what was her name...? He blinked at the healer blearily as she slowly reached over and patted something soft across his forehead, a cloth wiping away the feverish beads of sweat that had built up.

Trying to remember the blue-haired (blue hair...was...) woman's name, Kokichi's eyes drifted to his other side, landing on someone he recognized immediately. "Kaito?" he rasped quietly, wanting to reach out to his husband, but the tips of his fingers only barely twitching for his efforts. "What...?"

Kaito gave him another grin, but this one was...considerably more strained. And his eyes were already stinging red as he quickly at first, and then slowly, moved forward, not wanting to startle his husband as he reached over his hand, taking it into his own and rubbing his thumb along the side of his palm as he said, grin still on his face but his voice tight, "H-hey, Kokichi...hey, you're okay...it's, uh...you've been asleep for awhile, babe. A little more than a full day...y-you had a bit of a scare...but you're okay now..."

...he'd been asleep for more than a day? Sometimes he didn't remember being awake for more than a day, but...sleeping straight through? And if he'd had a scare... Kokichi relished in the warmth that seeped into him from Kaito's gentle grip, his fingers twitching again in an attempt to reciprocate as he looked between his husband and the healer.

"...I...got worse?"

Hoping she wasn't overstepping--Prince Kaito was...surprisingly gentle with Kokichi, more than his reputation had her thinking--the healer piped up. "Prince Kaito and Mr. Saihara brought you back to the med bay, saying that you'd had a nightmare--the stress from it really... Yeah, you got worse," she sighed, having talked with her colleagues and was bothered as well by the "nightmare".

Kokichi blinked slowly, not really comprehending that explanation, before his expression tensed in fear. "Sh-shuu..."

Kaito squeezed Kokichi's hand gently, "Hey, it's okay. He's fine. He got you down to med bay, actually. Y-you'd have been impressed, 'Kichi. He might have a chance to win...w-what did we ever decide to c-call it? Prince hauling?" Kaito said, chuckling slightly, trying to get that frightened look of his husband's face, his heart sinking at the sight. "Taking you up and down the stairs. He could totally w-win it, if he ran with you as fast as he did that day."

Then, swallowing hard, unable to hold back a few tears, quietly streaming down from his eyes, "I...I-I'm sorry, 'Kichi...I left you and...it was just supposed to be for a minute, b-but you had a...you had a nightmare while I was gone a-and...if Shuuichi h-hadn't been there..."

Kaito swallowed hard again, just...hating himself. First it had been Maki. Now Shuuichi. Both times his husband had collapsed...he had been so fucking useless...

He wasn't fine. Memories, confusing and disjointed as they were, came back to Kokichi through the feeling of his fear. "N-no...no... Sh-shuu..." Kokichi started to run out of breath, his pulse picking up from his distress, and the healer didn't know what to do about any of this, except for that Kokichi had to calm down.

Gently, she placed a hand on her prince's chest, trying to meter out his breathing, softly asking him to just focus on breathing, but, really, there was something more important than that at the moment.

"H-he...li-like the sec...secreta...fuckers...kissed me...and...trouble...hah..."

"Your highness, breathe!"

With her voice raised--Nell, that was her name--Kokichi had no choice, his eyes closing as he at first breathlessly gasped for air, the scared, worried look on his face never fading. Then, with the healer guiding him, he started to actually breathe again, if trembling softly.

"What's happening, what's happening?!" Kaito demanded, standing up, his own heart now pounding in his chest as well, looking back and forth between the healer and Kokichi. "D-do we need to go back to medical!?"

Kaito watched, wide eyed and trembling, as the healer placed a hand on his chest, almost like she was...showing him?? How to breathe again!?

"'Kichi...please calm down..." Kaito begged, though it was barely louder then a whisper, his good hand clutching his shirt, afraid to touch him again, afraid that any random fucking thing, some small startling move or Kaito saying the wrong thing, was going to kill his husband. "P-please, I'm listening, just please be calm."

Keeping her hand against his jugular, the other on his chest, Nell didn't move until Kokichi started breathing regularly. And, with a nervous look at Prince Kaito, she asked her prince, "Say the words you need to and don't think about them. Don't worry about their effect, we'll deal with it later. Just breathe, Kokichi."

It was a trick he wasn't very good at. One of the healers had told him a method of just...disconnecting his brain from the words coming out of his mouth, so he could tell people distressing things without hurting himself. Kokichi found it insanely difficult, and after Ikuo left...well, there was no one left for him to talk about his thoughts to anyway.

But he just breathed. And, after a long moment, he tried speaking again. "I...I screamed this time..." Kaito had said that he wished Kokichi had screamed that night. With all of his confusing feelings on that matter...at least Kokichi was sure that if anyone but Kaito tried to touch him, that was something he definitely didn't want.

And that was what happened.

"Shuuichi...wasn't a...d-dream...I...woke up to...him k-ki...kissing me...he looked just like Chisa..." Kokichi's soft voice cracked at that and he started trembling again, Nell's eyes narrowing as she assisted his breathing again.

Chisa. Also known among the Dicean staff as that disgusting bitch. Practically a rapist in her own right. But Nell could practically hear Aiichi's voice in her head, reminding that everyone was innocent until proven guilty, so the healer just leveled her furious gaze on the Luminary Prince.

"Until Kokichi heals, Mr. Saihara is not coming in this room."

Kaito stared at Kokichi, his eyes growing wider, and his body stiller with every word...and when his husband stilled, when the words were done, Kaito stared at him longer...finally saying, "'Ki...'Kichi, wai-"

"Until Kokichi heals, Mr. Saihara is not coming in this room."

Kaito stared at the healer, his expression...it was complicated. He was clearly, entirely horrified...but there was a weird sort of calm coming over him. His mind moving quickly. Looking between Kokichi and the healer, then back to Kokichi again...

..."Oh," Kaito said, his voice matching his expression. Swallowing deeply as he said, "Okay."

He in...in no way wanted to leave his husband. Who looked so thin and frail and like he was barely breathing still...

But...

..."Okay," Kaito said again. "Okay. I'll...I'll..."

Kaito didn't know what he was trying to say. I'll go tell Shuuichi? I'll be right back? I'll fix this?

..."...I..." Kaito swallowed hard, saying, frustrated and frightened and furious, but knowing that he needed to be quick about this. Couldn't afford to mess this up... "I love you, 'Kichi."

And Kaito walked out of the room.

He moved quickly, knocking on Shuuichi's door first, only because he was closest. He waited for one second and then knocked again, more urgently. Shuuichi opened the door, looking bleary eyed, rubbing the sleep from his eyes as he said, "Kaito?"

"Come on, come on, we have to go talk to Maki," Kaito said, pulling his friend from the doorway, dragging him to Maki's door, Shuuichi, confused, allowing himself to be led.

Kaito got to Maki's door, and did roughly the same thing, though he didn't need to knock twice, Maki immediately at the door, in her night clothes but not looking hazed by sleep as she said, "Ka-"

"Move, move, we need to talk inside, come on," Kaito said urgently, pulling Shuuichi inside, pushing him forward slightly before closing and locking the door behind him. Taking a steadying breath as his two sidekicks looked at him, utterly befuddled.

"Kaito, is everything alright? Is Kokichi awake ye-" Shuuichi asked, sounding concerned, before feeling the words leave him at the look Kaito shot him over his shoulder...a look that was....

Desperately afraid.

"Kokichi's trying to accuse Shuuichi of assault," Kaito told both of them, turning around, his whole body trembling as both of his friends stared back at him. Stunned.

"...what do you mean he-" Maki demanded.

Kaito cut her off, explaining quickly, feeling like everything was urgent, not sure how quickly the healer would pass on the story and how quickly it could affect his friends. "Kokichi's nightmare was about Shuuichi acting like Secretary Chisa. H-he's convinced it happened. I couldn't...I couldn't argue with him without potentially setting off another heart attack, a-and..."

"A healer already heard him say it. I don't know what to do," Kaito looked over at his childhood friend, a shamed, frightened frown on his face. "Shuuichi, you're in danger."

Kokichi watched Kaito leave with an upset expression, though he kept breathing with Nell's help. Don't think, just breathe, don't think, just breathe, just...

"Shhh," the healer whispered, keeping the easy rhythm up while she grabbed the cloth from before, dabbing at Kokichi's deathly pale face. "It'll be okay. You'll be safe, and we'll sort everything out once you're better. Nothing will happen in the meantime. It'll be okay, Kokichi."

Kokichi looked at her, his frightened expression and round face making him look years younger than he was. It was the kind of look that made everyone on staff wish Ikuo was still there. "...Kai..."

"It'll be okay," Nell repeated, wiping the beads of tears away from his eyes, gently moving Kokichi's hair out of his face. "I'll tell him you asked for him. Please rest, Kokichi. Things will be better after you rest."

And, though he was scared and worried, Kokichi shut his eyes and let the waves take him under again.

And, well...word traveled quickly in the Dicean castle. While not given a reason, by mid-afternoon, the entire staff was alerted that Shuuichi was not allowed in the princes' bedroom.

Shuuichi looked back at Kaito, just...confused and... "What do you mean?" Shuuichi asked, his voice stammering slightly, reaching up to touch his cap and only realizing in that moment that he hadn't put it back on. "What do you mean? We...he'll realize it was a nightmare soon, right? He's probably just disorientated."

"Sure, but we may not have time for that," Maki realized, pulling out a blade and playing with it nervously in her hands, her own mind now whirring, coming to similar conclusions Kaito had. "Especially since an outsider already heard it. Even if Kokichi takes it back later, half this castle is going to be convinced by tomorrow afternoon that you just sexually assaulted their prince."

"B-but...but I didn't!" Shuuichi said, looking more and more alarmed, looking between his friends, increasingly nervous. "I was just the one who woke him up! What is he saying I did!?"

"He says you were kissing him in his sleep," Kaito said miserably. "Though I think the dream itself was actually about Chisa. He said Shuuichi looked like her...I'm sorry, I'm so sorry you guys, this is my fault. I...I did something bad to Kokichi a couple nights ago a-and...I think between that and being sick and what she did...plus seeing Shuuichi first thing...fuck, I'm so sorry!"

"Enough. Stop it Kaito, that's not helpful. We need to decide what to do about this," Maki said, twirling the blade in her hands. "Whether Kokichi takes it back later or not, Shuuichi's about to be officially accused of assaulting the Dicean Prince, in the capital, in his castle, surrounded by his protectors. Kaito's right, Shuuichi. You're in danger here."

"Fuck, fuck, I don't know what to do," Kaito said, each word gritted between his teeth in a death grip. "I can't argue with Kokichi right now. He almost stopped breathing just from the stress of telling us. If I try to argue with him in time to stop any repercussions, it could seriously hurt him. So...so...??"

The three friends stood there. At a loss for what to do.

"...I...I have enough savings," Shuuichi said suddenly. Quietly.

The idea had been in Maki’s and Kaito's minds as well, but Kaito put his hand over his eyes and whispered, "No, no, no..." and Maki just narrowed her eyes at the floor, clutching both hands into fists.

"I was always going to leave the castle eventually, right? This is me and Maki's chance to start over, right? We were both always planning to go out on our own eventually..." Shuuichi laughed quietly, a small blush on his face as he shrugged helplessly. "...I guess I'll just do it first. Get out there, get a job, lay low for a while. By the time I come back, Kaito, you can convince Kokichi he had just had a dream, and...everything will be fine again, right?"

Both of his friends stared miserably at him. Finally Kaito dared to say, "M-maybe nothing bad would happen to you if you stayed...maybe we could convince everyone..."

"He's a Luminary and Kokichi's the prince of Dicea," Maki said. Deadpan. "If it comes down to a game of he said, she said..."

Shuuichi gave his friends a nervous, placating smile. "It's okay! It's just temporary. I'll stay somewhere nearby and I'll send you guys an address soon you can send post. I'm not disappearing on you. I'm just...moving out. Very suddenly. Tonight. It..." Shuuichi laughed sadly, looking tired. "...it's for the best."

The three argued about it for a while longer. At one point Kaito started to threaten to make Shuuichi stay, to order him. Then he cried, ashamed of himself, and begged his friend to stay...

...there was eventually an exchange of hugs...

...and the next morning, it didn't matter that Shuuichi wasn't allowed in the princes’ bedroom.

He wasn't in the castle anymore.

Gossip was rarely flattering.

There were rumors that Aiichi was just waiting to spring some secret heir on the country when Kokichi died, the people left reeling so no one would object.

Of all the things Aiichi could do without...he really hated those rumors. His son was weak and sickly, yes, but he had the makings of an incredible leader, and Aiichi could think of no better person to leave in charge of Dicea.

There were rumors that the community garden only flourished under Nazumi's care so much because she used people as fertilizer.

She sometimes didn't even take her gloves off when it was just her and Lake, too ashamed of the blood on her hands.

There were rumors that the Luminary Prince was a bloodthirsty, violent rapist and had convinced his husband that he couldn't trust anyone else to gain Dicean protection.

...

And now there were rumors going wild about one of the Luminaries that came with the prince, who ran away, so, like, super guilty, right? Was he the one behind the prince's violation? Had he tried to bribe and threaten the Dicean leadership on Luminary's behalf, to create an invasion from the inside? Had he tried to KILL the PRINCE?!

No information came out, so imaginations were left free to fill in the blanks.

Kokichi sniffled softly as he awoke in the evening that next day, looking around for that splash of red he'd asked for every time he stirred.

Kaito had been hiding in Maki's room since last night, though Maki herself was out with Timothy, doing her best to do damage control, to watch out for him right now. Kaito should be out there with her. Starting the process of gently clearing Shuuichi's name...but instead he was hiding. Lying on her bed, staring at the ceiling, just...well aware that this wasn't a permanent solution to his problems.

...he had to go back to Kokichi eventually...he still had a responsibility to him...his husband was sick...he needed Kaito to...Kaito needed to...

Kaito groaned, curling onto his side on the bed.

He didn't wanna go.

He really didn't wanna go.

...so, what, what was he gonna do? Just stay in Maki's room forever? Fucking mope? Shuuichi had been right. All of this was...was temporary. Kaito hadn't lost one of his best friends. He was just...out there somewhere now. And he'd be fine. The detective was intelligent and clever and brave. He'd be totally fine, and...and Kaito had a responsibility...he had to go be a husband now. A prince-consort.

...once Kokichi's head cleared, so would this whole situation...Kaito just had to be patient.

...

...

Okay, so...so go then. Get up and go back to your room.

...

...Kaito groaned.

Okay. Okay. Send a prayer to Atua. You are Kaito Momota. You...you...

Kaito stared miserably at the wall.

...just go you dipshit. It won't get easier the longer you hide.

Kaito sighed, getting up. He left Maki's room, and headed to his door, passing Shuuichi's room, which they had pillaged to get him everything he would need for the road packed...standing by his door just...totally aware some healer would be in there...and his husband...

...you have to go in. You have a responsibility.

Kaito took a steadying breath, and walked inside. Without a knock. "It's me," Kaito murmured, mostly speaking to the healer he knew would be in there. "Is...is 'Kichi awake?"

Kokichi looked over when he heard the door open, the latest healer having just finished giving him his latest dose of tea, his heart aching--firmly metaphorically--when he saw his husband walk in.

...there was so much he wanted to talk about, but he didn't even know where to start. If he should even say a word since...everything made him hurt. And...he knew so much of it would only hurt Kaito, and it just hurt even more to upset his husband, god, he was so shitty, why was Kaito even putting up with him at this point...

So, all that came out of Kokichi's mouth when Kaito entered their room was a miserable, "Kai..."

The healer on duty, who had heard their prince's pleas and his misery, looked between the two men before awkwardly stepping to the side. "I'll...I'll be right outside the door. I'll hear if anything happens but I'll just...give you two some privacy. Yeah."

Left propped up on his pillows, Kokichi glanced at them leaving before settling his gaze on the blankets, his hands shaking slightly from both chill and nerves.

Kaito stared at Kokichi a moment, stepping aside to let the healer through, the door closing behind them. Kaito looked warily over at Kokichi, assessing him, his averted eyes, his slight tremble...

Kaito grinned.

"Hey, look at that!" he said cheerfully, walking to the bed, sitting on its edge, careful not to disturb Kokichi too much as he looked his husband over, saying enthusiastically, "You look like you have more color back on your face already! That's...that's great! How are you feeling, 'Kichi?"

Kokichi glanced just barely at the edge of Kaito's form, his lips parting before hesitating. He wanted to ask where Kaito had been...but that felt really...demanding? Controlling. How many times had he wished for Kaito to find his own path in Dicea?

But he'd also asked Kaito to stay. Because he was sick and scared and worried and...dependant. Because he didn't have anyone else so he clung on disgustingly tight.

...he'd thought he'd had Maki and Shuuichi too, but... He could remember them joking around with him after he'd gotten sick before the wedding, before things had gone so wrong... How on earth had that Shuuichi, with his shy smiles and theories and ease turned into...that?

...Shuuichi was Kaito's friend. One of his best friends, who'd followed him to another country, who had gone up against a scarily capable assassin to prevent tragedy. Who hadn't treated Kokichi any differently despite knowing all about him.

Who'd...begun saying scary things and getting drunk and...

What had happened? Had he missed something? Had...he failed another person?

"...I don't feel well at all..." he murmured, settling his gaze away from Kaito again. "I...I've messed everything up..."

...Kaito tried to think of something to say to that, and couldn't. He was so...conflicted right now. He had to be a good husband. Kokichi was sick and needed Kaito to be kind and gentle right now, or he could literally die. Kaito needed to not stress Kokichi out.

...he just didn't understand why Kokichi would say something like that.

Of ALL the people in the whole FUCKING world that Kokichi had to call out...between Kaito who had actually hurt him, and the secretaries who had got to go live on their 'loooooong, booooring' lives, to all the other self-centered assholes in this castle...o-of all the people in this whole fucking WORLD that Kokichi had to decide to take action against...

...Shuuichi fucking Saihara??

The idea that his childhood friend, who had watched out for Kaito his entire life, might actually be capable of molesting Kaito's husband while literally in a recovery sleep from almost dying, was such an obviously baffling concept to Kaito that there was no part of him that had taken it as a possibility, even for a second. Kokichi had just been through a traumatic event. He had just woken up from it, and had gotten confused, and poor Shuuichi had...just been the unfortunate person in Kokichi's line of sight.

That was reality. There was no part of Kaito that could believe anything else.

A-and he knew that Kokichi hadn't known Shuuichi for that long...that they didn't share that same level of trust...and his husband had woken up terrified, and Kaito hadn't been there to calm him like he had promised, so Kaito understood that this wasn't entirely Kokichi's fault, but...

B-but...how could he???

But Kaito couldn't say any of that. He couldn't. As fucking...furious...as he was, Kokichi couldn't handle that side of him right now.

Maybe later...maybe...maybe when he was feeling better...

...Kokichi was going to...feel better, eventually, right?

...was...was King Aiichi righ-

Kaito closed his eyes tightly, took a breath, and reminded himself that he was sworn to Kokichi, not his father. He had to believe in him. H-he had too. Kokichi would get better if Kaito was patient. When Kokichi was better, he'd realize his mistake and then everything would be fine. Kaito believed that.

So, embracing this idea, reminding himself 'patient' and 'gentle' and 'don't fuck it up or your mistake will literally kill him', Kaito gave his husband a small smile. "...no, of course you didn't...i-it's nice of the healer to give us some privacy, but if you're not feeling good, I can help you lie back down again, babe...unless you need something else? Have you been to the bathroom yet today? Definitely don't wanna leave that to the last minute again," Kaito said with a small chuckle.

Kokichi sent his husband a helpless, baleful look. He didn't want to be patronized, but...he couldn't handle a single thing, could he. Every little thought he had that wasn't dazed with sleep put enough strain on his body that the healers... They'd said...

"...they said Shuu-chan left the castle...where is he going?" Kokichi ignored Kaito's attempts at just brushing everything away, needing to try and salvage any part of this. "H-he needs help...being away f-from you and Maki-chan isn't...ah...that."

...Shuuichi had still called them over in time. He'd had that horrible, excited smile, but...he hadn't let Kokichi die. Hadn't waited until it was too late. From what people said, he'd still taken Kokichi to the med bay after...

Kokichi shivered at the memory, a bead of sweat rolling down his temple. His temperature had been staying way too low, making him break out in feverish sweats as his body freaked out. Being sick always sucked, but especially this time, Kokichi just felt so...useless. Burdensome.

"It's not too late..." he breathed, eyes falling closed as he trembled.

Kaito found himself playing with a loose thread in the blankets, glancing up at Kokichi every now and again as he shrugged. "He's just going away for awhile, till all this is cleared up," Kaito explained, "We weren't sure...what everyone in the castle would be like with him. And, he's not a fighter, you know, so...but he's okay. Everyone's okay."

Kaito wanted to ask Kokichi again what it was the prince had thought had happened...but Kokichi had barely been able to breathe the last time he said it. Kaito didn't want to hurt him...

"We just...me, Maki, and him all talked about it last night, and decided it might be better for him to go for a little while...he's not gone or anything. He's just not here," Kaito explained lamely, giving another shrug, though he suddenly remembered, glancing up nervously at Kokichi as he said, "He, uh...he wanted me to let you know he was sorry he scared you..."

"He needs help..." Kokichi pleaded again, already knowing he didn't have enough in him to fight for this. But he couldn't fail Shuuichi more than he already had. He hadn't known Chisa, but Kaito seemed utterly shocked by everything she did. Whatever had happened to her, if it was happening to Shuuichi now...there was still time. As long as kindness would be accepted...there was still time.

Swallowing, panting, Kokichi tried to explain things better. If Kaito understood, then he could help too. "That day...at training. Shuu-chan an' I were...talking about Luminary...my chest hurt so much...and when I-I fell...he looked excited t-to see it...but he helped... He's not...like her yet..."

Kokichi started shaking so much his teeth started to chatter, and, not wanting to prove even more how broken he was, he stopped there, gasping in breaths to try and steady himself.

Kaito felt his back tense, his jaw set, and his hand grip into a fist as he said, staring at the thread on the blanket, "He's not like her at all."

What the fuck was Kokichi talking about??! What was he trying to say about Shuuichi? That he was like Chisa? Fucking...mean? And manipulative, and pleased to see Kaito beaten and pushed to the ground, and willing to almost get Kokichi killed on an overdose just for the fun of both the princes knowing their first time ever together had been Kaito raping him, and then telling everyone, again, for fun??!

Shuuichi was like that!?

"...you're mistaken," Kaito muttered, "It didn't happen like that. I don't know what you saw, but Shuuichi wouldn't...be happy you were in pain. He's not like that."

Hearing his husband's teeth start to audibly chatter, Kaito sighed, turning back to him, forcing the anger away as he said quietly, "Are you cold? Do you want me to hold you?"

Shuuichi was Kaito's best friend. Had been for years--of course Kaito would believe in his friend. But...it still hurt that Kaito didn't believe him. That he wouldn't even consider that something had happened to change Shuuichi, even when he had commented himself that the detective had been acting oddly lately.

So...Kokichi changed tactics. Right now, it didn't matter what Kaito believed, as long as he got Shuuichi help. "...e-even I can see that he's acting weird... Maybe...maybe I'm wrong, but...he n-needs help... I muh...messed up your b-bro-date...he shouldn't have to go through this alone..."

Kokichi knew what he saw. But if Kaito refused to believe him, then pushing the point would only make him refuse to believe anything. ...people already thought he was crazy. He could handle a little more.

Gagging softly, Kokichi knew he was running out of time. Shivering and sweating, he reached a hand out as far as he could--which wasn't far at all--towards Kaito as he panted. He needed to use his limited words to make sure Shuuichi would be okay, but they were running out period.

"Help with what? He got a little drunk once, and hung out with people on his own. That's strange, but it's not crazy. That doesn't mean he's lost his mind-!" Kaito stopped himself, gritting his teeth. Reminding himself to be calm. Gentle.

Kaito's brow furrowed in concern, clearly seeing that Kokichi was stressing himself out again. They probably needed to stop talking about this, especially because...Kaito could feel himself wanting to lose his temper, and that...that wasn't fair on Kokichi.

He could see Kokichi trying to move his hand, and fuck...his husband could honestly barely move...was it any wonder he had panicked, if he had really believed Shuuichi was trying to force himself on him? Kaito couldn't even imagine what being like this would feel like...

So Kaito shifted himself closer, taking Kokichi's hand in his and saying, "Please calm down...I don't know where Shuuichi went. He didn't tell us. Okay?" Kaito wasn't sure if Shuuichi had even known where he was going. He didn't know anyone here, didn't know the area...where could he possibly go? But no, no, if anyone could figure it out, it was the detective. He was so smart. He had promised to write as soon as he was set up somewhere...

"Nothing's ruined. He's not gone forever. He's not alone. He's going to let us know where he is as soon as he can, okay? And when he does, we can get all this cleared up. We just...I know, I know things are different here, but...we just didn't want anyone to hurt him...okay? That's it, that's all, we're just trying to keep him safe, okay?"

Had Kaito forgotten what had spurred the idea of their bro-date in the first place? No one would be okay after what had happened to Shuuichi, let alone with whatever was happening to the detective now. If nothing else, Shuuichi at least needed support.

And disappearing definitely wasn't that.

Kaito's hand felt almost burning against Kokichi's chill, but it was something that at least broke through the numbness in his body. Shuddering, Kokichi kept his eyes closed, feeling sweat drip down his forehead and between his eyes.

"No...nothing will happen...until I'm better...Nell didn't sah...say anything...s'jus...hearsay...Shuu-wuh...be fine..." Kokichi could hear himself breathlessly slur, his time almost up, especially as his vision began to darken even with his eyes closed. His icy fingers twitched in Kaito's hand, so desperately wanting his husband to stay and make it all better, but worried about the detective...who no one was looking out for right now...

Kaito just stared at Kokichi as he talked, feeling sad and tired grappling with the fact that Kokichi was, once again, trying to tell him something that just...didn't match with that Kaito had always known to be reality.

It was such a contrast, between being devoted to Kokichi and being devoted to Byakuya. His brother made it so easy. Because he knew what the world looked like to Kaito and the way Kaito thought and cut through all the red tape in Kaito's brain by just...telling him plainly what he was expected to think. It was easy.

Believing the things Kokichi said was always so much harder. It was so much harder...b-but...

"...okay," Kaito said, tired and worn down. Not having it in him to tell Kokichi he just plainly thought he was wrong. That the idea of there being no dangerous repercussions for this accusation for Shuuichi was actually insane. "Okay. I'll...I'll talk to Maki and I'll see if we can't find him and bring him back, okay? If Shuuichi isn't in any danger here, then...I believe you."

And, maybe he did? Maybe it really would all be fine, and everything was fine, and Kokichi was right, and...

...but Kokichi couldn't be right...because there was no way Shuuichi would ever...

Kaito sighed. Looking over at Kokichi, he whispered, not even entirely certain his clearly passing out husband could hear him anymore, "Let's lay down, okay? I just wanna get some rest with you. I believe you. We'll fix this."

Kaito went over to Kokichi and readjusted him, laying him down flat on the bed and moving his pillow more comfortable under him, before leaning over, giving him a kiss on his forehead. "It's fine, I believe you, it's fine," Kaito said, reassuring both his husband and himself as he crawled in beside him, holding him close, ignoring the almost shocking cold of his husband's body against him as he whispered, "Everything's okay. I believe you."

...it sounded like Kaito was lying. But there was nothing Kokichi could do about it, not right now. Not when unconsciousness was past beckoning to him, now forcibly pulling him under. Kokichi didn't have the energy to worry, but he still did, and he found himself wanting to believe in Kaito, taking solace in the comforting warmth that he wanted to burrow in, but could only allow Kaito to pull him closer.

No longer hearing voices, the healer cracked the door open and, seeing the princes in bed, resumed their post, looking more at the slow blips of the heart monitor than the men.

Word continued to spread around the castle. Prince Kokichi was no longer allowed to leave, and would need additional supervision wherever he went in the castle. If someone saw that he was starting to exert himself or was getting upset, he was to be calmed, and if not that, then subdued. The leader made plans to put a lock back on his son's door. On the outside.

People argued, as they always did, but, being reminded of the bleeding, unconscious, barely breathing prince, his heart starting to stop beating...no one found themself with a leg to stand on against the boss's orders. This was all to keep Kokichi alive.

A few people here and there shared looks. But, the life the boss was making...was that one worth living?

Maki had told Kaito that she would look for Shuuichi when he asked her the next day, hearing out Kaito's explanation that Kokichi had assured him that Shuuichi would be fine and would come to no harm. She had listened to him with a blank expression and no argument, and when Kaito had finished, staring at the floor and shame-faced, she had promised to do what she could and would let him know what she found.

...Kaito had a feeling Maki thought he was an idiot and just didn't want to tell him that. He believed she was actually looking for Shuuichi, if just to make certain he had gotten somewhere safe, but...but she didn't trust the people in this castle, and Kaito had a feeling she didn't trust Kokichi anymore either.

And as Kaito went to pour some more tea for Kokichi, having just...the slightest inkling that maaaaybe the sound of the people working on the door might just wake his husband up, Kaito trying...very, very hard not to think about what the sound meant...he had a feeling Maki might be right.

Don't think about it, it didn't matter, Kaito just had to keep Kokichi calm when he woke up, just keep him calm...

Kaito went to go sit at Kokichi's bedside, placing the cup on the nightstand, and felt his whole back tense at the sudden sound of drilling...

Kokichi had slept a lot the past few days, his breathing slowly regulating and his temperature warming up to something that didn't scare the shit out of everyone. Sleeping was preferable to being awake, but...Kokichi wished he'd just died instead. Without him, Shuuichi...would still be in trouble, but he'd be there. With his friends.

...or, no. Without him, without his cursed fucking existence, Shuuichi would be just fine...probably. He, Kaito, and Maki would be back in Luminary, around a world that they knew, even if they hated it. But...they'd be together. There wouldn't be someone casting doubt, which was what Kokichi knew Kaito and Maki took his words as, instead of his plea for someone to save Shuuichi before it was too late.

But no one had listened to him in the past few days. It was just irrational, delusional, fragile Kokichi...not allowed to go outside or...he had a feeling, ever leave his room again.

He couldn't hide a wince as he heard a drill outside the door.

...he didn't want to make Kaito a murderer, but...he wanted to ask his husband to help him fall out the window.

Instead, Kokichi pulled the covers over his head, not wanting the world to judge how much he'd messed everything up...again.

Kokichi was awake...and immediately under the covers. Hiding. This wasn't the first time Kaito had seen him do something like that the last three days, but Kaito found himself relieved at how swiftly Kokichi had been able to do it this time. His strength was definitely returning to him, little by little. Good. That was...that was good.

Kaito put a hand on Kokichi's shoulder, thought about asking Kokichi to come out as the drill paused for a moment, something being sanded...and, when the drill came back on and Kaito winced, instead, smiling gently, asked, "...any room for me under there?"

"It's your bed too." Kokichi kept his eyes scrunched shut as he bit his lip, maybe hoping that if he just...put himself into the smallest, darkest place and blocked everything out, he'd just disappear. He couldn't ruin anything else if he didn't exist.

What he would once find sweet about Kaito being gentle with him now just hurt. Kaito kept around him and still spoke with Kokichi because he didn't want him to die. Because any little thing could shatter him. Kaito was a good guy, and even though Kokichi had driven one of his best friends away, and made things horrible forced Kaito into at least part of his chained life...Kaito didn't want to give him the mercy of death.

And Kokichi couldn't be mad at him for it.

Reaching out of the covers for just a moment, Kokichi pulled a pillow under, quickly hugging it to his chest.

Kaito rubbed Kokichi's shoulders a bit, before sighing, realizing that was the best response he could hope to get by this point as, outside, two people talked to each other, someone asking his partner to hand him a different size of something. There was the metal clunking sound of tools being moved around a metal box, the two making idle chit-chat about something, one of the guys talking about his sister, whose son had been missing ever since the royal wedding, and how the uncle felt like the 'damn'd idiot probably just ran away, but she's all worked up of course, thinking he's hurt somewhere'...and that all Kaito could hear before the drilling started again.

Going to the other side of the bed, Kaito pulled the covers back, just long enough to burrow under them himself, settling in as, under the darkness of it, his eyes adjusted, until he could see Kokichi's back, thin and frail but moving (thank god) with tiny breaths.

After a moment, Kaito reached out, poking Kokichi's back. "Hey, come on...look at me."

Kokichi hesitated a moment before rolling over, peeking over the pillow he clutched to himself at the large, dark form of his husband. Maybe he could just...put the pillow over his face and press against Kaito. ...it would be too cruel to stop breathing around Kaito again, even if his husband wanted it.

"...I'm never going to be able to leave again..." he whispered, scrunching his eyes shut again. "I'm gonna be locked in here until I die." And, hopefully, that would be soon. Even if he wouldn't be able to convince anyone to help him out, maybe, once he could get up by himself...he could convince Kaito and whoever was watching them that he could at least bathe by himself...and he could drown in the tub. He was used to not breathing...and Maki had once said there were worse things than drowning.

...he hadn't seen her in ages. He hoped she was alright.

"...Kai-chan doesn't have to be here, you know," he managed, speaking around the bubble of dread in his throat. "You can get your own room like your brother wanted...be free to go wherever you want...you could get Maki and Tim and Shuuichi and go on vacation yourselves...don't have to deal with any of this..."

And maybe by the time they came back, if they even wanted to, he'd be gone. Never to hurt them again.

"Hey, hey!" Kaito said, reaching forward and firmly grabbing Kokichi's arm, squeezing it just tightly enough to prove a point, his frustration with Kokichi's words obvious. "No, stop that. I'm not going anywhere, not unless you want me to. We're gonna deal with this, okay? A-and this isn't forever," Kaito promised, though that promise was based on nothing.

Kaito had only found out an hour before they started working on the door, what the plan was going to be...and it had been a jarring moment, when he had seen the handy-men start preparing. When they had explained they were putting in a lock, Kaito had actually thought for a solid fifteen minutes that this meant the king was planning to give Kokichi (and Kaito) his privacy back...that maybe the king was trying to make up for the round the clock watch Kokichi was under right now, now that there were signs Kokichi was getting better...

Kaito had tried to argue when he realized what was actually happening, and the healer who was, at this very moment, sitting quietly in the corner of the room, had taken Kaito aside and reminded him that if he freaked out, Kokichi was going to freak out, and did he want the prince to have another relapse??!

So Kaito had gotten quiet and left the handy-men alone and went to go pour tea for Kokichi.

...Kaito hadn't heard anything about the beach yet. He spent all his time with Kokichi these days, only stepping out to talk to Maki that one time and to deliver the business mail Kokichi had been working on to Hideki, at Kokichi's request... and no one had come in to tell Kokichi anything, not while Kaito was awake...no one ever visited Kokichi at all, if it wasn't part of their job...

Kaito had decided by the end of day two.

He hated everyone here.

Well, except for Maki and Tim, of course. And Kokichi! And Hajime was...not as bad as everyone else. And someone had at least brought Kokichi some of his favorite flowers, so...so that was kind of nice...

...but otherwise, yeah. He hated all of these people.

"We're not going to the coast without you...we're all going to the coast together, remember? I'm gonna...I'm gonna talk to the king as soon as I can, okay? He was willing to listen before...they can't do this to you forever..."

"You think people haven't tried?" His voice wasn't accusing. Not angry at all. Just...sad and accepting. "Almost everyone in the castle has tried to take Aiichi aside when he's pulled this shit to say, 'hey boss, don't'cha think you're being a dickhead?' And every time he's convinced them that it's for the best. I don't know how on earth he hasn't convinced you too..."

"...especially when you think I'm crazy too..." he murmured even more softly against the mattress. Everything was falling to pieces... Everything he'd do would make it worse. He was trapping Kaito in this fucking room by...some sense of honor or some shit, when no doubt Kaito would be out there trying to fix things with Shuuichi otherwise. No one thought he'd had anything but a nightmare...

...the one time he'd spoken up, and he'd fucked himself over so much he was being literally imprisoned in his room for the rest of his life.

Kokichi didn't even notice as he started to sniffle, breath hitching softly though not dangerously.

Kaito frowned, rubbing his thumb up and down Kokichi's skin. "I don't...I don't think you're crazy. I think you...really believe you saw something in Shuuichi and...m-maybe that's because you did? Shuuichi was...acting a little odd, those last few days."

...not odd enough to make Kaito believe he'd be happy to see Kokichi hurt or try to force himself on him in his sleep, per se...but maybe odd enough to do something that Kokichi would think was both of those things? Though, honestly, Kaito couldn't even imagine what Shuuichi could have possibly done to be misinterpreted that badly...

"And when Maki finds him," and is willing to tell Kaito she had found him, only holding back from knowing that Kaito would tell Kokichi once he knew, "or Shuuichi sends that letter he promised us, we'll ask him what's going on with him. I was wrong to let Shuuichi leave when he did," Kaito told him, not admitting to Kokichi that there wasn't a lot Kaito could have done to make him stay...had literally begged Shuuichi to stay... "When he comes back, we can get this all sorted out, and everything will go back to normal."

Kaito suddenly jumped, startled as the now familiar drilling sound was suddenly replaced with the banging of a hammer.

Taking a calming breath, Kaito looked at Kokichi, who was just so...fucking clearly miserable that it broke Kaito's heart. Kokichi hadn't looked anything less than entirely depressed since he had woken up. The way he talked, when he talked, was all...it was all so much like the day in the closet...

"King Aiichi can say whatever he wants to me; I'm sworn to you," Kaito said firmly, entirely sincere in this. Sure, he was...he was having doubts. Anyone would have doubts, right? It didn't matter if you had doubts, so long as you didn't act on them! That was the key! So Kaito continued on. "If he says it's one way, and you say it's another, I believe you. That's just how it is. That's not going to change. And if you say you can handle a trip to the coast," despite so much evidence now that he couldn't, "then that's where we're going! We'll convince him! I promise!"

...would Shuuichi even say anything if they asked? How fast were things moving? If he hadn't said anything before, why would he now? If he fled the castle, then that meant he didn't feel safe, that Maki and Kaito didn't think he'd be safe, and feeling like you were surrounded by enemies meant you'd be constantly defensive...which meant, even if Shuuichi wanted to say anything...he wouldn't.

Kokichi flinched into himself at the sound of the hammer, feeling the vibrations in his chest. It was enough to force him to breathe slowly, trying not to get out of rhythm again.

...he wanted to see the ocean. To hear the crash he'd always been told was one of the most calming things you could hear. To walk along the coastline and feel sand under his feet and maybe pick up pretty shells that he'd find. Maki and Tim would be out in the water, just deep enough to comfortably swim in, and she'd try to get him to do laps, and he'd complain that they were on vacation. Kaito would pull Shuuichi out of the shade, and of course they'd forget to put on sunscreen, but as Kaito challenged him to a castle-building contest, they'd all laugh even as they turned red, and then in the inn they were staying at, Maki would chew them all out. Kokichi would even goad Kaito into trying the local delicacy of the area he'd read about, a type of giant sea snail, and maybe it'd be something the Luminaries actually liked.

Kokichi had stopped sweating as much once his temperature had evened out, but he felt wetness around his eyes again.

Not believing in Kaito's promise--because even if Kaito could make the impossible possible, surely this was too impossible to change--Kokichi pressed his pillow to Kaito's chest and then pressed his face into it. Hoping Kaito wouldn't catch on.

Kaito looked curiously down at his husband, who was both pressed into him and hiding into his pillow. Sighing, Kaito put his arm around Kokichi's waist, soothingly rubbing his back, pressing little circles between his muscles, which were tight and twisting against each other.

"...Hey, we still have some of that massage oil stuff in the bathroom," Kaito reminded Kokichi, still doing his little circles. Just trying to think of...just anything that would make his husband feel any better right now. As the noise outside their door got louder, Kaito wondering, for fucks sake, how long did it take to install a lock!?? Couldn't they fucking just leave them alone!? He said, keeping the frustration out of his voice, "I could go grab it and we can take the ache out of you a little. You'll feel better if you, ya know...feel better."

When Kokichi didn't answer this either, just still trembling and, most likely, crying into his pillow, Kaito tried again.

"I've almost finished that book you got me...I'm really excited to tell you about it, if you wanna hear about it...though, I think based on the way things are going, the ending’s going to be kind of a downer..."

No answer at this either. Just more trembling.

"...'Kichi, please, could you...just talk to me-"

Kaito froze, his ears picking up a familiar sound, both soothing and stressful at the exact same time. The drilling, sanding, and hammering had all stopped, and there were...voices outside...two men arguing with...

"...Maki?" Kaito said aloud, pulling back the blanket and looking out curiously.

The healer (Kaito didn't know his name. Just knew that this healer didn't like talking to either of them and tended to just sit quietly unless needed) scowled, getting up to go check on the door.

Kaito deserved far better than him. Someone who could ensure his friends' safety in a way the Luminaries would understand, someone strong and capable and could tell Kaito exactly what they wanted and didn't want during sex and wouldn't just let themselves be raped, someone that could actually protect Kaito both from the schemes of his home nation and the hatred in this new one, someone who could make Kaito happy. And not worried and uncertain and confused and...

The pulse monitor.

Before his head got too fuzzy, Kokichi quickly pressed the node against Kaito instead, the monitor only hiccuping for a moment before returning to a normal, healthy pulse...if one for someone kind of distressed.

...that was all...he'd done everything. Now...he could finally give everyone peace.

Kaito's voice faded into indistinct background noise, and Kokichi could feel his chest start to burn, his heart start to pound in panic though he was still, just keeping his face pressed against the pillow, even as Kaito shifted. It wouldn't be too long now... Just as long as no one noticed, he could leave...

The arguing was mostly muffled, right up until the healer opened the door, and-

"Do you wanna die!?" Maki said, murder eyes on bright, hair floating in her violent energy as the two handymen both gave her annoyed, tense looks, though one of them did have the brains to take a step back at this, recognizing the sincerity in the question. "Get out of my way!"

"Maki Harukawa," the healer said dryly, "I'm certain you've been told. You're not welcome in here. The prince doesn't need any disturbances, and definitely not from someone who so frequently says things like 'do you wanna die'. Now you will-" the healer, continued, reaching out, no doubt to take Maki by the shoulder and firmly turn her around.

Kaito recognized the look in his friend’s eye and quickly kicked the covers up, getting out of bed as fast as he could and heading to the door and--what the fuck just popped off him?

BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!!

The reaction was instantaneous on the part of the healer, who looked back, eyes wide with shock, as the pulse monitor informed him that the prince had just flatlined unexpectedly. The healer bolted back, ripping off the covers and...oh this little motherFUCKER-

The healer grasped both Kokichi's shoulder and the pillow, and RIPPED it out of his arms, Maki and the two handymen coming into the room as well, ready to help as required as the healer looked Kokichi over, checking his pulse and his breath-

Kokichi was limp by the time the healer got a hold of him, his chest still and his skin losing any amount of color he'd managed to gain in the past few days. A few last tears escaped his closed eyes as the healer put him on his back and tipped his head back, starting on chest compressions.

Aiichi had been on his way up the stairs when he heard the shouting, a detached part of him surprised that it wasn't Kaito shouting. The news was...shout-worthy, at the very least.

He knew his son-in-law was still uncomfortable around him, but something like this...Aiichi wanted to make it clear that Kaito had support. That one of their inventors, a brilliant young woman, was working on a way to have almost instantaneous communication, and that, as soon as they could, they would get in touch with Kaito's brother and...

All thoughts stopped in the leader's head as he looked in on the scene in his son's room, dashing in the rest of the way, taking in that still body, his baby, his baby boy who wasn't moving or breathing or--

"KO!"

Kaito's shoulders were hunched up to his ears, his eyes wide and his whole body trembling. "What happened, what happened, I was just talking to him, what!?"

The healer was clearly trying to do chest compressions on the prince a second ago, before the king had come in and grabbed Kokichi, clearly panicked, much like Kaito, who was frozen. The healer was putting a hand on the king’s shoulder, saying urgently, "Boss, we have to hurry, we have to get him to the med-"

Maki didn't need to hear anything else.

She moved quickly, grabbing the back of the king's shirt and, using her entire upper body weight, hurled him backwards, off of Kokichi. More out of surprise than probably anything else, the king lost his grip on his child, falling backwards onto the floor as Maki immediately went to collect Kokichi.

As she ran out of the room, she glanced down at the king for one second, a look of pure, unfiltered disgust at him, before jumping onto the safety rail, and, not concerned about the sheer damage she knew she was about to do to her knees, just knowing that the body in her arms was dead and would stay that way if she didn't hurry, she leapt.

Clutching Kokichi close, she landed two flights down, rolled into the fall (fuck! Definitely...definitely hurt her shoulder), and then got up and ran straight to medical.

"HE'S DEAD!" she screamed, coming in. "FIX HIM!"

They fixed him.

They fixed him, and as Kokichi coughed and gasped for air, the cry he let out echoed in the bay, something heart-wrenching. The despair of a soul that wasn't even being granted death. And, looking on in horror as the prince flailed, trying to rip himself apart with his bare hands, the healers realized that Kokichi had done this on purpose.

No one was allowed to die in the castle, not without the unanimous agreement of the boss, the prince, and the head secretary, who had to check in with the head scribe and archivist. It was a healer's job to help people.

So they held the screaming, thrashing prince down, an easy feat physically, and got out supplies they rarely had to use. Padded cuffs and soft bands to tie the prince to the bed, a gag to keep him from biting his tongue off. And they hardened their hearts even as his screams became muffled, all the way until he passed out, making sure his chest was still moving.

It was a...long day.

Just...a very long day.

Eventually, when Kokichi was...better?...alive, anyway. And like he was going to stay that way...despite his best efforts...eventually the king told Kaito, late in the afternoon, about the news from home.

Kaito had just listened blankly. Having already been given the news from Maki.

Maki had shoved a letter in his face and demanded he read it. When Kaito had finished reading it, Maki had asked him what the contents of the letter was. Kaito, knowing she had read it, knowing what she was testing...lied to her. Just staring her in the eye tiredly. Following the now useless instructions in the letter.

Maki had asked him to try again. To really try to tell her what was in the letter.

Kaito lied again.

It was...so rare. To see Maki cry. And she had kissed him on the forehead and hugged him and told him that it was going to be okay. That she was going to go make this right. To just hold on until she got back.

Now it was night time.

Kaito had, at first, been told that he couldn't stay in here. That Kokichi was in a fragile state and that his presence may make an already difficult circumstance harder to deal with. Kaito had gone to the king and begged for his help. To tell the healers to let Kaito stay with his husband. Promised he could help Kokichi, if given the chance.

And he meant it.

Now it was late, and Kaito was sitting at Kokichi's sick bed, just...staring at his husband. Who was...bound and...gagged and...

Kaito looked around. There were healers in the room. They were in an open area, rather than a private room. But they were all on the other side, both busy with other work, and trying to...give the princes some sense of privacy. Kaito ignored them. Eyes only for Kokichi.

He was...very tired.

It didn't hurt. That was the point of the restraints. They were specifically designed so...nothing would hurt. Not the slightest chance of something becoming sharp or too tight.

...fine.

At some point one of the healers had given him something, said that it'd make him feel...well, not better, but not as bad until he was ready to feel better. Until he'd stopped having his fit and would just calm down. Everyone thought of him like that...a crazy child...can't even be trusted to live by himself...was just throwing a needless tantrum...

But whatever the healer had given him made Kokichi feel sleepy and numb and just...far away. If he couldn't be dead...well, that was still preferable, but, selfishly, this was a good second-best. He was still causing other people problems, but at least it didn't hurt him as much. He could just float here...until he was allowed to drift away...

He couldn't move within the restraints, couldn't do much more than grunt though his voice was shot from screaming, so Kokichi just looked at Kaito. In that soft, floating space, still wishing things could've been different.

...he was awake again. Kokichi kept coming in and out, waking up with just as little fanfare and effort as he fell asleep. Kaito hadn't done much the last few times Kokichi had woken up, but...it was very late. And Kaito was very tired.

So this time he smiled.

Kaito stood up, going to the other side of the bed now, his back to the healers, and he leaned down, resting on his broken arm, ignoring the stinging, urgent strain that put his arm under. Just reaching out and brushing the hair from Kokichi's forehead...

"Prince Kaito," one of the healers called over, their voice stern, "If you're trying to mess with any of his restraints, we'll have to ask you to leave. They're for his protection."

Kaito looked over his shoulder, giving the healer a small smile. "No, no. I wouldn't dream of it. I won't touch them."

The healer nodded, giving the prince a stern look, before returning to their work.

Kaito looked back down at Kokichi, running small, soothing fingers over his forehead.

"...you're so greedy," Kaito said, the small smile accompanied with a small chuckle, his eyes stinging red. "You're always so greedy...always trying to leave me behind..."

Kaito looked over Kokichi, running his hand through his hair now. "Maybe that's my fault," Kaito murmured. "It was a bad idea, to take your heart for myself. It's so fragile, 'Kichi...and I was so fucking clumsy with it..."

His own heart was pretty broken and bruised as well, at the sight of Kokichi, but, well...that was just one more heartbreak over many that day. After awhile, it all just kind of...emptied out a person. He almost felt fine, in a weird way. Sad. But fine.

As Kaito ran his gentle touches over Kokichi's face, he said, keeping his voice low, "...you have beautiful eyes. Did you know that 'Kichi? Beautiful, purple eyes...I knew someone growing up who really, really liked purple eyes...sometimes, when I look at you, I feel this thought come into my head of...man...they would have ripped you apart had you been sent to Luminary, instead of me to here. He would have never left you alone...so...I guess we got real, real lucky, huh..."

Kaito chuckled.

"...you're not the only one who tried to leave today," Kaito murmured, "Lots of people left recently. Everyone's left, I guess...Maki and Tim...Maki's gonna go be a hero, I guess. Tim refused to let her leave without him. So..." Kaito shrugged, tiredly, "...I thought about ordering them both to stay. They would have, if I did. That's just the sort of thing I can do to them...but I couldn't bring myself to do it. It would have disappointed her...it sucks to be disappointed..."

Kaito turned back to Kokichi, looking at him curiously still. Tired. Affectionate.

Kaito took his good hand back, and, reaching into his star-lined jacket, pulling it out of his inner pocket carefully, in a way where the healers behind him wouldn't see it, Kaito took out the golden dagger.

"I was pretty disappointed when I realized you were trying to leave me behind," Kaito admitted, just...casually holding it. Still eyes only for Kokichi. Empty and tired. "That's so mean, 'Kichi...you never even met Koh...it'd be so awkward if you had to introduce yourself to him without me..."

"...do you really wanna die, 'Kichi?" Kaito asked quietly. His expression sad and tired and empty. "Like...really, really?"

...Kaito really was too good for him. Ripped from his home to be stuck to some disappointment...and still was always so kind to him. Even when Kokichi didn't return the kindness.

Kokichi watched Kaito move and listened to him talk in his sleepy, distant haze, eyes just barely able to convey his sadness...his guilt...his selfish love for Kaito, still, despite everything. And when Kaito brought out the dagger...

...he wanted to sleep. Kokichi wouldn't go wherever Kaito's god prepared people for, but...sleep sounded nice. A place he could just...stop hurting others. And...if he could do it in a way that wouldn't hurt Kaito too...

Kokichi blinked sleepily up at his husband, huffing softly through his nose, unable to nod, but hoping the message got through anyway. With the way things were, with the people he continued to burden...this was for the best.

Kaito's heart fell into his stomach.

...he...he had really been hoping that the dagger would scare Kokichi. That maybe...that maybe...

There was no hope.

Kaito felt his eyes burn. Big, ugly teardrops fell from his face as he saw Kokichi relax. Waiting for the end. Done, done, Kokichi was done, and Kaito...Kaito had no one… Everything was wrong and his friends were gone because of him and his parents were dead because Kaito hadn't been able to keep it together for a few weeks and now his husband was waiting to...

...Kaito had brought the dagger to scare his husband into wanting to live. It had been Maki's advice. But...but she had said...she was such a good friend. Oh god. She had said if that didn't do the trick and he really, actually wanted to die...

Kaito gave Kokichi a shaky grin. Tears falling quietly down his face, trying not to alert the healers as he put down the dagger beside Kokichi, and reached back into his pocket again.

It was a needle. Maki had refused to explain where she had gotten it, or what was in it.

All she had said was it wouldn't hurt.

So, his heart broken, and just a sheer...weight of hopelessness engulfing him...eyes wet and spiraling with despair...Kaito took the needle and leaned down and, because he couldn't kiss Kokichi through the gag, couldn't kiss his husband goodbye, he kissed him once, twice, on his forehead, before resting his own head against him as he whispered, "O-okay then...I love you, 'Kichi...I'll see you soon."

And Kaito pushed the needle into Kokichi's neck and filled him with whatever was in it.

Kaito immediately dropped the needle once it was done and grabbed the dagger, knowing that he would need it in just a moment. Kokichi's eyes blinked once, twice, and then closed, whatever was now in his system sending him to sleep...and then his body started to tremble. Spasm.

The pulse machine started going haywire. Beeping rapidly. Just long enough for the healers to start to move towards them before it, almost immediately, flatlined. Kokichi spasming for another second before he stilled.

As the healers shouted and ran towards them, demanding to know what was going on, insisting Kaito take a step back, Kaito kissed his husband's forehead again, thanked Atua for loving him, and took the blade against his own neck.

-

B A D E N D I N G

{....................................................................}

The god who probably didn't exist sighed, tapping their foot impatiently at two spirits in front of them, one who was looking up at him sheepishly, the other in open shock.

"I'm very disappointed in both of you," the god who likely didn't exist sighed. Shaking their head.

"You're lucky Koh makes such good arguments. Fine. Let's try this again. But remember...I love you," the god who likely didn't exist reminded them sadly.

"Please love yourselves too."

{....................................................................}

L O A D S A V E F I L E

{....................................................................}

Shuuichi smiled against the kiss.

Kokichi's lips were soft. And small. And he tasted good. He wanted to taste him more, wanted to stick out his tongue and... and...and...

Shuuichi suddenly felt a chill inside of himself. It came on sudden, and cold. Like an entirely imaginary ghost of a horse with the permission of a fake god had come in from an alternate timeline and was literally drop-kicking some sense into him.

...what...what the fuck was he doing...

Shuuichi let go of Kokichi, backing off before he could follow through in the urge to lick him. What...he...

...Shuuichi had told himself that he wasn't going to do this to his friends. That he was going to protect them from this...Kokichi was in recovery right now, and even more than that...Kaito would...something like this would destroy Kaito.

Shuuichi felt a wave of excitement at that thought...and then bit his lip. HARD.

He bit it so hard that the lip split, and he could taste the copper of his own blood. Not pleasant, but...some of the haze went away at the bite, and Shuuichi fidgeted nervously with his cap.

Yes. Okay, yes. It had...it had felt good to touch Kokichi like that. And Shuuichi was pretty sure he could get away with it, even if Kaito walked in just now and caught him doing it. His friends loved him. He could say he tripped and fell on Kokichi and Kaito would believe it. Because he had Kaito's trust. But...but that...Shuuichi had earned that trust by loving Kaito. A genuine friendship over the course of decades. This...this new sexual...thing inside of Shuuichi...

He couldn't. He couldn't act on these impulses on his friends. He couldn't.

...maybe...maybe he should limit himself back to one dose a day. Three was clearly too much, and even two was difficult to control. Yeah...back to one dose a day...

Shuuchi took out his journal and wrote down the new symptoms and problems with multiple doses, and Kaito eventually returned and went into bed with Kokichi, falling asleep against him, taking a real, genuine comfort in knowing that Shuuichi was watching over them.

The next time Kokichi woke up, he felt a little better. Not good by any standard, fuck no, but less disoriented, less worried that everything was going to fall apart. But he was still cold, so, with the little bit of shifting he could manage, he pressed into the nearby warmth, sighing lightly.

Luminary...he couldn't stand anything about it. Or, well... He liked Kaito, Maki, and Shuuichi. He was growing fond of Tim, even if he wasn't sure the boy would ever grow to be comfortable around him. He hadn't really spoken to anyone else from the Party--aside from the obvious--but...they were people all the same. Joking, friendly, doing their best...undeserving to be held under leadership that didn't care for them...

Kokichi still couldn't do anything about it...but that thought, in his sleepy, hazy brain, didn't fill him with the same potent agony as before. Instead...he should just focus on his work in Dicea, work on relations with Luminary the small bit he could, and just...look for opportunities to change things. Maybe...maybe Byakuya would be open to listening when he started to lead more. Maybe an uprising would actually work. Maybe...the more vulnerable members of Luminous society could find asylum in Dicea while things changed in Luminary.

...he couldn't lose hope. Not while people were counting on him.

Groaning quietly, wanting to be warmer, Kokichi called out to his husband. "...Kai-chan?"

Kaito had been having a dream about Maki. More specifically, he had been having a dream about trying to eat Maki's hair.

Neither of them had said anything about it. Kaito was just sitting next to her, chewing on the end of one of her long ponytails, and Maki had just been quietly letting him. Like that was just a normal thing to do. For such a weird dream, it had been surprisingly comfortable, and when Kaito was roused from it, he did so peacefully, blinking slowly and glancing around.

Maki was at the window seat, looking around, glancing at Kaito and waving at him slightly before going back to looking out the window. Maki. So, Kaito had slept through all of Shuuichi's shift then, and judging by the lack of light outside, Maki's shift wasn't quite done yet either.

Kaito sighed, turning around in the bed, realizing he had shifted away from Kokichi a little bit in their sleep. So Kaito whispered, "It's okay, I'm here," and shifted closer, putting his arm around him and sighing into his hair. "Hi, 'Kichi."

Kokichi sighed gently, having to carefully exhale, but there wasn't any pain in his chest from the action. The Luminaries were taking shifts, he knew...if Kaito was in bed with him, then, for his sake, Kokichi guessed it wasn't his shift. ...it was a little embarrassing to be cuddly with someone else in the room, but it wasn't anything Maki or Shuuichi didn't already know. And while his sex life was firmly off limits, just being...a couple? It was actually pretty nice if people knew that.

So Kokichi let himself relax in Kaito's arms (or, arm and chest) and murmured to him despite their audience. "...m cold...bu' thanks for bein' here...both of you."

"...shoul' I have my next dose...?" It had been day the last time he drank a cup, right? He thought so...but his memory wasn't the best right after an attack. He awoke so infrequently that it was a good rule of thumb that every time he did he should have more, but it was up to whoever was watching him to really keep track of his doses. Kaito had done a good job last time, despite being...less than stellar with his own medicine, but Kokichi knew the escorts would be on top of things.

...he really had to do something to thank them properly when he got better.

"...when we go on vacation...I've read a lot of...special, touristy things to do...we should plan on what we wanna see...mmph..."

Kaito blinked, looking back over at Maki. "Maki? Has Kokichi had any medicine on your shift yet?"

Maki looked back at him, nodding. "Beginning of my shift, though he was mostly still asleep through it. But, that was five hours ago. Probably wouldn't hurt to do more. Stay in bed, Kaito, I'll bring it to you."

Maki went to go pour a cup of the tea as Kaito kissed Kokichi's forehead. "You sound stronger, but let me help you sit up anyway."

While Kaito repositioned Kokichi, Maki brought over the glass, both of them waiting a beat to see if Kokichi would try to reach for it himself. When he didn't, Kaito took the glass from Maki, thanking her, before he started the process of feeding it to Kokichi.

"Well, what kind of touristy things are we talking about?" Kaito asked playfully, giving Kokichi small sips and stopping every time Kokichi's lips closed against it, giving his husband a break. "If you're talking museums, Shuuichi will be thrilled. He's into that stuff. I am too, for certain subjects. And Maki..."

"I will be there," Maki said, from her favored spot by the window. "Looking through the gift shop."

Kokichi gave Kaito a small, grateful smile. There was no way he could sit up on his own yet, but...any acknowledgment of him recovering was a big difference from how he usually was treated. Even with them seeing if he would take his medicine by himself, even though he couldn't raise his arms reliably...

He still hated being sick, and he hated that he'd worried everyone so much. But this...was tolerable.

"There are some museums," he murmured between sips, though he didn't elaborate until the cup was empty. "There's a maritime one I've read about...'pparently there's even what's left of one of the first sea-worthy Dicean ships in it. Maps of when explorers first started going out from the coast instead of into the continent...stuff like that."

"There's a local delicacy...I mean...since they're on the coast, towns there eat a lot of seafood... But there's a way of preparing it that's...lower on seasoning, I guess? Maybe close to something you guys might've had in Luminary."

Leaning back onto the pillows propping him up, Kokichi's face practically looked like white marble in the moonlight, but the soft smile on his face and the curious glint in his eyes brought him to life, made him more than stone.

"...did you guys have legends about mermaids in Luminary? I...ah... I helped with... They're a dance troupe, pretty much. But they have fake tails as part of their costumes...and they perform in a cove...last I heard, someone was trying to cultivate bioluminescent algae to grow in the cave that's part of their stage... A-and they put off performances for part of the year because...it's when sea turtles lay their eggs...and they don't want people messing with them..."

Kokichi quietly told his friends of all the amazing things he'd only been able to imagine, his breathing steady though he needed to pause at times. There were a lot of things that weren't okay. But there were a lot that were amazing too. He wanted to share those ones.

Maki and Kaito listened to Kokichi, as much as his energy would allow him, rant about the things he wanted to see, adding in small commentary every now and again, but mostly just humming in approval, encouraging him to keep talking every time there was a lull. Sometimes his voice would get real quiet and start to break, but he'd swallow and get a second wind, his sentences coming out stronger for a little while, finding a rhythm in the effort that neither the Luminary Prince nor the Assassin wanted to interrupt or discourage.

But one particular thing caught Kaito's imagination, as he said, "Wait...I don't understand...so did they fly or didn't they?"

"It sounds more like they jumped to me," Maki said, fighting the urge to tell Kaito that he really should be trying to sleep right now. His shift started in two hours, after all. "Twelve seconds in the air doesn't sound that impressive."

"Okay, but...I mean, I've seen, like, thought experiments for flying bicycles. But everything I've ever read about it says it didn't work. That even with human propulsion helping it along, we couldn't, ya know...make wings that could both flap fast enough and were light enough to hover. Or something...so how did they?"

As Kaito and Maki spoke up for real, and even with as much as Kokichi wanted to keep talking with them, his fatigue caught up with him quickly. In the small moment of them debating, Kokichi's eyes drooped and his head lolled to the side, and with one, two, three slowing breaths, the space that had once been his weak voice was now gentle snuffles. The prince had fallen back asleep, not frustrated with how little he could do or how people treated him like even that little bit was nothing, but with visions of an upcoming vacation lifting his heart.

-

As Lake walked to the castle that morning, long enough before her shift that she could comfortably grab breakfast and hang out for a bit, she fought with herself. Like she always did, she filled Nazumi in on the goings-on of the castle, and, well, Prince Kokichi collapsing was always a major event, for how often it happened. Things had really started to seem like they were looking up for the prince! Lake couldn't imagine how frustrating it was to be stuck in bed again...but at least he had his husband, and the other Luminaries had taken up looking after him too.

For how much Prince Kaito disliked her...Lake was happy to see how happy Kokichi was with him. She could respect his anger...and that was why she was conflicted.

Nazumi had given her a vase of chrysanthemums for Kokichi...and Lake had no idea how to give it to him. She hadn't had the chance to interact with Shuuichi and Maki much, but she could easily imagine Kaito's anger transferring to them too. And they were always around Kokichi. For good reason! But it made gift-giving difficult.

...but the Hero of Justice hadn't made her way to the Dicean Castle through being a coward. So, preparing for ire, she made her way up to the third floor and knocked softly on a familiar door, the bright gold and red flowers sitting safely in her hands.

It took a while for Kaito and Maki to notice Kokichi had fallen asleep again, the two used to idly talking to each other without needing much outside encouragement, and Kaito laid Kokichi back down while Maki cleaned up the tea, warning Kaito he needed to go get another batch during his shift today.

"I hate leaving him when he's like this, though," Kaito admitted, giving Maki a small, sheepish grin. "I know it's probably me just being overly paranoid, but I feel like if I turn my back on him too long, he'll just...I don't know. Spontaneously combust or something."

Maki shrugged. "I've never been in charge of keeping anyone alive before. It's not exactly my skill set. But still...I have a hard time believing Kokichi would fall apart if you just left him by himself for ten minutes."

"Sure, but...I really don't know, you know? I want to believe in him...and I do! Of course I do!" Kaito said, his tone suddenly urgent, alarmed that he had let some of his doubts slip out, glancing at Kokichi to ensure he was still asleep. "But...it's hard. I have no idea what his limits are. All I know is the small bit I've seen, and that the king and everyone else in this fucking place think he's capable of literally nothing and...I don't know. Kokichi thinks he can make it on a cross country trip and is annoyed that the king would even ask a healer to come along. Like...between those two views, I have no idea what the truth actually is..."

Maki hummed at this, considering her friend carefully as she said, "...what if we found out he really can't do all the things he wants to do? If someday Kokichi tries to do something that we, that you, know for certain is too much for him...that it would probably kill him. What would you do?"

Kaito ran his fingers through Kokichi's hair, barely even needing to think about it. "I would let him."

Maki gave her prince a hard look at this. "...Kaito. He's not Byakuya. You understand that right? Out of everyone, it's extremely likely you'll spend the most time with Kokichi from now on. You have to be able and willing to tell him no, if the time comes."

"I say no! And I don't know what you mean about Byakuya. I could say no to my brother...besides, this isn't that! I can argue with Kokichi. All we did was argue when we met! I pushed him to the ground and called him names! I think that's pretty indicative that I can say no to him."

"Sure, when he was just some guy, and then was the guy that, if everything went well, you may end up marrying," Maki said dryly."Since you've been married though? Don't think me and Shuuichi haven't noticed. You talk to Kokichi like you're constantly afraid of upsetting him."

"No, I don't," Kaito said, getting frustrated with this line of questioning. Wishing Maki would just leave this alone. "Sure, maybe I don't argue with him like I would with you guys, but look at what happens when he's stressed! I have to be more careful talking to him! And, don't think I'm like some simpering dog around him when we're alone-!"

"Kaito, that's not what I mea-"

"I'm not! I can, and have, been a real asshole to him, Maki! I've done some really shitty things! But he just lets it go! If anything, I need to be more restrained about what I'm like around Koki-"

There was a knock at the door, which was probably a good thing, since this was clearly about to turn into an actual fight between the two, Maki getting frustrated with Kaito's refusal to acknowledge the actual issue she had with Kaito's mentality around Kokichi, and Kaito starting to feel guilty about recent and not so recent events again, wanting to lash out at Maki for making him think about it. It was a fight they probably needed to have (most of their fights were), but doing it in front of a passed out Kokichi was probably in bad taste, and so with some relief, Maki went to go check the door.

"It's probably Hajime," Kaito told Maki, getting out of the bed and stretching. "He's the only one who really knocks around here..." he explained, as Maki opened the door.

Maki recognized the guard on the other side of the door, but only in the most vague way possible. Kaito had never gotten around to telling Shuuichi and Maki the story of what happened, so when Maki looked at her with open hostility and suspicion, it was just in the...normal, murderous way she greeted anyone who dared come to the room.

"Yes?" she asked.

Lake took a breath and gave the killer(???) woman a bright grin. "Good morning, Miss Harukawa! Sorry to bother you all so early, but, uh..."

She held up the vase with a more sheepish smile, keeping her voice soft since, even though she could hear someone else moving around the room, it certainly wasn't Kokichi, and she didn't want to disturb the prince's rest.

"Nazumi arranged these for Prince K--wanted to give him something to bring a little cheer in, yanno? I know Prince Kai doesn't want me in the room, so...would you accept them? People might be swingin' by throughout the day, droppin' off cards 'n shit, but these babies can't really slide in under a door." She laughed, softer than her usual variety, hoping she wasn't about to set off one of the Luminaries again.

...she hoped they were reading to Kokichi when he was awake, or talking to him. As a guard, Lake had never really had time to watch over the prince when he fell ill, not more than popping in between duties or when she got off shift, but she knew the others would do their bests to entertain him in the moments he was awake.

...of course they were! She saw how they treated him--they were doing a good job, surely!

Maki looked at the flowers, the guard, then back to the flowers again...and narrowed her eyes. A violent energy suddenly radiating hotly off of her as she said, "...that's very kind. Please, come in."

Maki took a step back, widening the door for her, the heat still coming off her like a flame, suggesting passively that if the guard refused her invitation, that maybe several people would die as a result. She closed the door behind the guard, squeezing the handle for a second, taking a small, calming breath that, as usual, failed to calm literally anything...and then turned around hotly.

Turning her murder eyes on Kaito.

Kaito had been busy quietly glaring at the guard, feeling himself tensing reflexively at the sight of her. He didn't know what he was going to say, but something snippy and mean was definitely forming somewhere in the back of his mind as she walked in, vase of flowers in hand...but before Kaito's mind could finish the thought, he felt Maki's gaze on him, and any open hostility that Kaito had started mustering towards the guard dampened significantly as every warning system in Kaito's body went off, shit, shit, Maki was mad, why was Maki mad!? Fuck, don't forget to protect your neck and stomach!

Hunching up his shoulders slightly, Kaito gave his friend a nervous grin. "Maki?"

"Kaito," Maki responded, deadpan. A dagger suddenly in her hand, twirling idly. "Why did this woman just tell me that you're keeping people away from Kokichi? Have you been discouraging visitors?"

Kaito's eyes widened, glancing at the dagger and taking a step back, glancing nervously back and forth between the guard he didn't trust at all and Maki, who he could trust implicitly...but would also absolutely stab him if she felt like it. "...w-what?"

Uh oh. Was this a test? Some 'gotcha' mind game in Luminary culture? Lake knew that Luminaries took every opportunity they could to hurt others, giving people impossible tasks then punishing them when they couldn't do it...

An old anger sparked up in the woman. These people were Luminaries, but they were in Dicea! In the castle, where people were protected! When people tried to play games like that...you just had to bust right through!

Keeping her head held high, Lake quietly walked into the room, her gaze softening as they landed on Kokichi's sleeping form. Just the other day he was skipping through the halls and grinning without any worries...it wasn't fair. Placing the vase on the nightstand nearest the prince, adjusting a few of the flowers that had gotten stuck on one side, Lake was aiming to be in and out, but Maki's words made her pause and look between the young woman and other prince.

Holding out a non-threatening, calming hand in Maki's direction, Lake shook her head with a surprised expression. "Hey, hey, no need for that. There's nothing wrong with needing privacy. If Prince Kai isn't comfortable with me around, I'm glad he said something."

"Other than whoever's watching him, visitors don't really stay for long anyway--too many people around tires out Prince K real fast, and he's usually asleep anyway, so we just leave notes most of the time," she tried to explain. Then, she shrugged a little, glancing between the two Luminaries. "And if y'all aren't comfortable with people comin' by, we don't wanna just...force our time with Kokichi and make things hard on him. As long as he's taken care of, that's what matters. We can see him another time."

Kaito felt himself bristle at the 'Kai' nickname, having noticed Kokichi was calling him that lately, and feeling annoyed at this fucking person for daring to be that familiar with him...b-but...come on, that wasn't...that wasn't what was actually happening...right!?

"Fucking bullshit," Kaito growled, trying to keep his voice low so as not to wake up Kokichi, but the tone harsh, clutching his hand into a fist as he glared at the guard, still keeping Maki in the corner of his vision as he openly glared at her. "I never see anyone come visit Kokichi. He's one of the loneliest people I've ever fucking met, and what? I've totally misunderstood what you all are like with him? Bullshit...come on, Maki?" Kaito said, turning that glare on his friend for a moment, feeling her gaze intensify, "You think this is my fault now!?"

Maki took a step towards him, her energy getting hotter as she scolded, "We have reputations here, Kaito. And if people think you don't want them to come see Kokichi, then yes, if he's fucking lonely, then right now it is your fault. Have you even talked to Kokichi about how you want to handle visitors? Because I remember you having to apologize to Hajime for acting like an ass to him too!"

"Sh-shut up! You don't even like Hajime!"

"That's not the point, Kaito! We've all been worried about the fact that Kokichi doesn't have any friends here, and it turns out he might and you've just been being dicks to them!"

"I'm not being a dick to anyone who doesn't deserve it! They're all selfish assholes who treat him like he's five!"

"You're acting like the toddler!"

"Do you wanna take this outside!?"

"Do you wanna die!?"

There was a knock on the door, though after a moment Shuuichi opened it, looking tired. "You guys are shouting. I could hear you down the hall," the detective muttered, walking past them and sitting on the vanity desk, leaning against it as he sighed. "Go. Spar. I've got him."

"I don't wanna fight Maki," Kaito muttered, glaring at the guard, "I wanna fight her."

...it was true they all had to maintain a certain level of professionalism, but that was mainly so they didn't just forget to do their jobs. Lake had been a teenager when the war started, still in training, but...fuck there was just so much to do. They really didn't have enough people to take care of the castle and its residents and the surrounding town and all the projects the people in it wanted to do...

Other than Ikuo, and the odd healer who took over looking after Kokichi whenever he fell ill, none of them had duties that allowed them to spend substantial time with the prince...but they still had tried. So many of them had grown up with him, had watched him grow up.

...had seen a miserable child try so hard to cheer other people up, and then turn around and nearly kill himself. He was hardworking and selfless to a fault, something that for those of them that ended up joining the staff through difficult circumstances, made them so fucking guilty...and then Kokichi still tried to help them. But he never did anything to help himself.

Kokichi was the kind of leader that inspired people to live up to the best they could be, and that took so much of him that everyone in the castle just wanted to protect their little Light of Dicea. To keep him from burning out.

Maybe that was selfish, but it was a flaw they could all live with.

Lake met Prince Kaito's glare. Looked at his broken arm. Then nodded to herself.

"Then fight me. In the courtyard, so we don't freak anyone out, but if you wanna fight, let's fight. No playing guessing games."

Maki rolled her eyes. Kaito was about to get his dumb ass handed to him, but, well, he was the one fucking demanding it. She turned to Shuuichi. "You sure you have him? You slept last night?"

Shuuichi nodded, giving her a small, patient smile. "I did, yeah. Right after my shift was done. It's fine, I'm good, go ahead."

Kaito glanced back at Kokichi, who, thankfully, seemed to have slept through his and Maki's shouting match. It got like this between the two hot-heads, sometimes, and honestly after all this time they were overdue for a good fight between them. But he would absolutely prefer to knock some sense into the guard that had dared treat his husband so poorly and then look at Kaito like he just didn't get it or something.

Grabbing his sword from its spot leaned against the corner of the room, Kaito put it over his shoulder as he said, "Fine, let's do this. Two out of three hits, Maki referees."

"I swear, if you re-break your arm, I'm making you do push-ups on it," Maki muttered, the three heading downstairs to the courtyard.

It was a pretty nice day out, if a little windy. The sun was out, the air smelled nice, and Kaito was excited to be in a good fight again, something he had been craving for ages now. Sure, his fight with Katsuki technically counted as a fairly recent one, but...it hadn't been much of a fight honestly. Just Kaito swinging wildly and getting the shit punched out of his balls.

As Kaito stretched a little, keeping a careful eye on Lake, it occurred to him that...Kokichi might not appreciate hearing about this later. Kaito knew Kokichi liked these people. He didn't...understand why Kokichi liked them, Kaito's own interactions with the castle so far extremely limited and super colored by his endless concern with Kokichi's physical and mental hang ups, but...he knew he did. And he might be mad when he found out.

...like...really mad...

...maybe Kaito should...

Kaito remembered what Maki said earlier, and bit his lip, his pride fucking hurt at what he (misunderstood) her accusation to be. He was NOT afraid of Kokichi! He wasn't afraid of ANYONE. Kaito was his own person and could make his own decisions!

S-sure, that was waaaay easier to say when the person he least wanted to upset was currently in his own kind of on and off coma, b-but th-that wasn't the point!

"Miss...sorry, I don't know your name," Maki admitted, looking over at the green haired woman, "You know how spars work, right? I'm assuming it's the same between cultures? If I see a move that does actual damage, or could, if it was finished, could do actual damage, I call a point. Does that work for you?"

Lake raised a bit of an eyebrow at seeing the prince pick up a sword, but...whatever. If he wanted to spar with a weapon, he could. Luminaries could do things in their weird Luminary ways.

As they got down to the courtyard, Lake gathered up her cape and considered it for a moment before starting to wrap it around her arm, pinning the limb to her body. Hmmm...maybe Maki would be willing to secure--

"Hah?" Lake looked up, twisted oddly in her cape, blinking down at the other woman before chuckling awkwardly. "Uh, sure, that works. Usually we go until one person concedes, or is unable to keep going and is conceded by an onlooker, buuuut..."

She sweatdropped a little, knowing that...this probably wasn't the best use of her time. But she'd been challenged! And Mukimuki-chan never turned down a challenge! "Considering I have to work after this, stopping after max three hits is probably a good idea."

"Uh, oh, my name's Lake, and, may I call ya Maki? Could you secure this?" The guard turned around. "Just pull on the end of my cape and that should do the trick, I think."

Maki looked blankly at Lake. "...what are you doing?" she sighed.

"If he can't use his arm, then neither can I!" She nodded towards where Kaito was stretching. "S'not fair otherwise. So I'm tying my arm to my front, like his sling!"

Maki put her hand to her temple and rubbed it a little, muttering, "Diceans..." to herself, before saying, "I... I don't even know how to respond to that. If you're saying both fighters need to be the same to spar, then I've literally never seen a fair fight in my life. Besides, he's one armed, not helpless...ugh, ya know what, nevermind. Sure, why not. Hold still."

Maki tightened the cape around Lake, securing her arm to her chest. Backing up, she raised an eyebrow at her as she said, "There, feel better about this? Cool. Go, have fun, help him get this stupid energy out of his system."

Kaito adjusted his grip on his sword, swiping it through the air, re-learning its balance. It was admittedly gonna be a little tough to do some of his preferred movements one handed, but the sword was light enough that he'd adjust after the first few movements. He had this! Yeah!

Kaito looked over at the woman (...what...why was she wearing her cape that way?), and felt himself lean into position, putting his leg out securely and readying his arm for its first attack as he said to her, "You shouldn't have touched Kokichi like that."

Maki waited till she was certain both people were in position, and then raised her hand. "Go!"

It wasn't that both fighters needed to be the same to fight--skill levels were far too varied to standardize something like that, and Lake had no idea how. But, in a situation like this, with an agreed-upon fight, it was about respecting your opponent! Prince Kaito probably wasn't used to fighting without one of his arms, so Lake would do the same--it was just mean and unsportsmanlike to not at least try to match his handicap.

"Thank you, Miss!" Lake nodded gratefully to Maki before taking her position, lowering herself into a battle stance and readying her fist. It was time to brawl!

...even if Prince Kaito brought other feelings into it. Lake blinked in surprise at his comment before darting forward, aiming at his wrist to disarm the prince. "...I owe Aiichi and Prince K too much to let him hurt himself. My job is to keep Kokichi safe, and I'll do everything I can to do that."

Kaito, who hadn't thought it was strange that she came into the fight unarmed, knowing that there were plenty of unarmed fighters out there who didn't need a weapon, still found himself surprised at her first move, having assumed she'd try a blow against him first and had been preparing to just breathe his way through the pain and keep his movement going (as he had, essentially, in another timeline where he had briefly fought Tom). But since she hadn't done that, his swing at her shoulder went wide as he had to focus on moving his arm out of the way, suspecting that if it came to blows between the two, that was a fight Kaito wasn't going to win. He had to keep his sword!

However, though he dodged the hit, the missed swing sent the tip of his sword into the dirt, and Kaito had to choose between taking the next second to pull it out, or to destabilize the guard, who was too close to him right now. Choosing to destabilize, he shot his leg out, trying to sweep her legs out from under her, as he had Kokichi in their brief spar.

"Your job was to keep him helpless, and congratulations. You did great!" Kaito snarled through the movements.

Trying to knock the sword away from this angle would leave her too wide, so Lake decided to knock the man away from the sword instead. Noticing the change in his footwork, she jumped up, using the momentum from her initial swing to grab at his shirt, trying to pull him in. Grunting softly, she furrowed her brow.

"You think having him rest for an afternoon is worse than being stuck in bed for days on end? You think he's less helpless the way he is right now? Or dead? I ain't a doc, but they say that if blood gets in his brain, he'll die. If he's bleedin' out, and if he doesn't just die from that, he'll be bedridden again. Stopping his nosebleed was the primary safety concern."

Before he could even get his foot off the ground, she grabbed at him, pulling him forward, which started twisting his hand away from his still lodged sword, Kaito's eyes widening in panic as he realized he was about to fall forward and needed a free hand to catch himself anyway, letting the blade go.

But if he was going to fall, she was coming with him.

Kaito fell forward against her and shot his hand out, gripping her neck and squeezing it as the two fell to the ground. He would have kept it there and kept his grip until she lost her air, but he landed on his bad arm against her, and there was a sudden shock of pain, Kaito immediately letting go and rolling onto his back, his eyes clutched close for a moment as he hissed between his teeth, protectively moving his good arm around his bad.

"Shit...why am I e-even trying with you??" Kaito complained, waiting for the wave of pain to pass. "P-primary safety concern...I-I can just hear that asshole feeding you that line..."

It was instinct to wheeze and lash out, but people who acted on those kinds of instincts couldn't be part of the Guardforce. Lake kept herself lax and calm as they fell to the ground, only tipping her head forward to land primarily on her back. Considering her legs were still bent and under the prince, she had planned to launch him off her, but he rolled off of his own accord.

She sat up in an instant, but recognized his look of pain, and all fighting intent was gone from her. Instead, Lake gently took the prince by his shoulder and braced it, easing him up.

"...you're trying because I was right when we first met," she sighed, watching him carefully for any signs of pain other than his injured arm. "You're a good guy, Prince Kaito."

"And 'that asshole' has worked his damn butt off trying to save as many people as he can...mostly from your people." She knew that wasn't fair, but...it was reality. "Is Aiichi the perfect father? Hell no, but at least he cares about his kid. Do you know how many damn times I tried sneaking Kokichi out of the castle as we grew up before Aiichi got it through my dumb ass how many times I could've killed him? How many times Kokichi almost convinced me to be his murderer?"

Lake huffed, gently brushing some dirt off of Kaito. "I'm not a parent, an' I don't know the right way to raise someone. All of us are fuckin' elated to see Kokichi bein' able to go out without havin' to sneak out. You all have been real good to him, it looks like. But every rule Aiichi's made has been to keep Kokichi alive, and none of us can argue that in good faith."

Kaito glared at the dirt, feeling tense as she kept touching him, but...not really angry about it either. More resigned and stressed than anything.

Yeah. He knew she was...right with the nosebleed thing. Kokichi himself had said that. But he didn't know how to explain to anyone this...feeling that the reason the whole nosebleed thing happened was because of a bigger issue with Kokichi's life here. How Kokichi might not have reacted with immediate hostility at being taken care of if that care hadn't come with so many damn strings attached...that his refusal for care was an overall systematic issue, and not just a single incident of Kokichi being unreasonable...

...but Kaito wasn't smart enough to put his fears into words like that. It was just a vague feeling that he couldn't communicate, and that was what frustrated him more now than anything. This idea that he could see what the problem was, but not...actually understand it enough to fix it...

...not to mention the Luminary comment...

Any fire he had deflated at that. Kaito suddenly distracted by...not wanting to think too hard about that. That maybe the reason the king had resorted to basically imprisoning his son rather than helping him adapt and just...be a person...was because he was too distracted by his own father's wrath against this kingdom. That maybe this, even Kokichi's problems, was all somehow linked back to the Momota family...

...not evil, we're not evil, we're not, we're not!

"...sorry," Kaito murmured. "I know you probably had better things to do than spar me. Thanks for taking the time. I still don't...I don't get how no one else here sees how...ugh, nevermind. I get it, you love and trust your 'boss'. Sure. Who wouldn't. The guy speaks super good and stuff," he said, the last line a tad sarcastic.

Lake paused, sensing the conflict in the younger man. But, wriggling her arm out of her cape, she stood, offering the prince a hand up. "It's not a problem. If I'm off shift and you wanna do it again, I'd love to brawl around with ya."

Her voice wasn't as excited as it otherwise would've been, and she sighed, conflicted in her own right before she gave Prince Kaito a serious look. "Aiichi cares about us, and we trust in him because of that."

"...Look, this ain't about me. But I owe Aiichi more than just because he's my boss. He's the kind of person that gives people like me second chances, and that's exactly the kind of person Kokichi is too, so if you wanna hate him, go for it, but not for how he leads us."

Looking between Kaito and Maki, Lake offered a small smile. "I can send breakfast up for you guys, Mr. Saihara, and Prince K, if ya want. I hope the flowers cheer him up."

Maki shrugged. "Sure, thanks. Please feel free to stop by any time, I'm sure Kokichi would love to see you."

Kaito said nothing, just watching her leave. Tired and, while way less angry at her, still not really feeling any better about Kokichi's situation.

Maki looked over at Kaito, appraising him as she said, "Well, that was one of the most boring spars I've ever seen. You literally just fell on top of her and then whined on the ground for a while. Maybe she's right, maybe that arm is too much of a handicap for you."

"Come on, Maki. I just...she clearly wasn't trying to hurt me and it's hard to want to fight someone like that. She freaking literally tied one hand to herself," Kaito said, sighing, gently touching his bad arm and wincing a little at the sting. "Man, that doesn't feel good...hopefully that's just a bruise."

"Did you at least get out of your system whatever you wanted to talk to her about?" Maki asked, that usually being the point of spars that just came out of the blue like that. At least in Luminary anyway. It was always just a more physical way to have a conversation. "Because you just look depressed to me."

"...none of these people seem evil to me," Kaito muttered to his friend, as they started to make their way back upstairs.

"Were they supposed to be?" Maki asked.

"..yeah? They were supposed to be evil when I came here to end the war, and then they weren't," Kaito explained, moving slowly to support his arm, "But then I started to get to know Kokichi, and the way he talks, Maki...they did so much damage to him. He's fine and fine and fine and then, whoops! Suddenly he's talking like he's going to throw himself out a window! It's scary."

"...Kokichi's suicidal?" Maki echoed, raising a concerned eyebrow at her prince. "Are you sure?"

"I think so? You should hear the way he talks sometimes, Maki. I don't know what to do! It'd...it'd be so nice if I could just fight someone and he would feel better and then everything would be fine, you know? So, I heard the way he talked, and was like, 'oh, okay. Maybe everyone here is evil after all'! But...they're not, they're just...I don't know. A bunch of people who care, but also really, really believe their own bullshit...which I don't even know if they're wrong, when they talk about it! I just know that the end result of all that dogma is Kokichi, and Kokichi is...not in a good place..."

"Well, they're doing better than us, anyway," Maki pointed out, deadpan as she added in, "And there's plenty of 'believing in the stupid shit fed to us' to go around..."

"What do you mean?" Kaito asked, his voice a tad nervous.

Maki thought about trying to start this argument again...then sighed. Deciding that Kaito already had a bunch of shit going on and probably didn't need Maki's thousandth attempt to sneak in the idea that the Luminary Kingdom was a disaster in between the fucking mess that was Kaito's haphazardly conditioned psyche. She'd try again later. "Nevermind. Let's go relieve Shuuichi. Poor guy's been watching your shift for a half hour now."

"Yeah," Kaito sighed, "I really let that get out of hand, huh. My bad."

"Whatever. You got it out of your system. Maybe now Kokichi will start getting some visitors, if we can get this fucking idea out of everyone's head that you'll snap at anyone who comes by," Maki said, though she thought about it and admitted, "Though...maybe taking to the courtyard and literally fighting the first person to try since we got here isn't...the best message..."

"...oh well," she said. "Baby steps."

In the room, Kokichi had peacefully slept through the whole ordeal, snuffling softly in a predictably easy rhythm. It was still important for him to get a lot of rest, but he'd get better and better until he would be skipping his way into town once again, only worse for the wear in ways people had hard times seeing.

As Kaito and Maki returned to the room, Kokichi shifted a bit, weakly reaching out across the bed, seemingly searching for his husband in his sleep. They really had adapted quickly to sleeping together.

Kaito smiled at that, going to his husband's side and leaning down, kissing him on the forehead. "One sec, babe, I'll be back," Kaito murmured to the sleepy prince, before looking over at Shuuichi, a grateful grin on his face. "Thanks for the save, man. I was kinda losing it. I appreciate ya stepping in."

Shuuichi yawned and nodded, not having had a chance to have his dose yet this morning and just...tired. "Course. You three work it out?"

"Basically," Maki said, with a small shrug, "As well as can be expected, I think. Are you doing anything this morning, Shuuichi? I'm still setting up that presentation for Kokichi, and I was hoping you would look over some of my blueprints, double check my reasoning."

"Presentation for what?" Kaito asked, confused.

Both of his escorts glanced at him, Shuuichi looking a little frustrated (he needed his dose) and Maki impassive as she said, "Just some work stuff. Hypotheticals."

"Hypotheticals that aren't going to ever be more than that, most likely," Shuuichi muttered, ignoring Maki's heated glance. "But, alright Maki. Just give me a minute to go back to my room and brush my teeth, and I'll head to your room."

"Thanks. See you in a minute. Let us know if you need anything, Kaito," Maki told her prince, before following Shuuichi out, the door closing behind them.

Kaito gave them a little wave, sighing loudly once the door was closed. Well...that was one way to start the day, he supposed. He had tried to be a hero, and had ended up just feeling like some hot-headed, stupid villain...again...

...oh well...at least he was okay at being a husband. Even if all he could offer was a source of heat and some mild comfort right now.

As he crawled into bed, he assured himself...there were worse things to be.

As soon as his sleeping form sensed heat, Kokichi cuddled right up against Kaito, sighing softly before his almost-snoring resumed. He'd wake up again in another few hours, probably be put out that he'd fallen asleep in the middle of a conversation. He'd take his next dose, and maybe be able to eat something, and just...continue on with the routine that he was painfully familiar with.

Though, he appreciated the new additions. It...wasn't fair to Kaito, and, somewhere, Kokichi was worried about freaking himself out, but...he needed to ask someone. Probably Maki. Alone.

...what was devotion training?

-

Shuuichi decided he needed to go to the library.

It was quiet there. And it smelled nice, which Shuuichi was finding he appreciated more and more these days (DP=heightened sense of smell? what correlation?? maybe pseudo-symptom? observer biased). And most importantly...the jar of Despair Pollen wasn't in the library. Calling to Shuuichi. Trying to get him to forget that there was a very good reason he was limiting himself back to one dose a day.

...god, he...he sometimes felt like he could still taste him.

Shuuichi felt a flush creep up his neck, putting down the poisons textbook that Seiko had recommended to him, rubbing at his temples under the cover of his cap. It was...it was so hard to stop thinking about it. Shuuichi had never been sexually active, before all this, his libido never pressuring him to seek someone out like that, though he had kissed people before. Well, two people. Well, a person at a party whose name he had never learned and who had made Shuuichi profoundly uncomfortable, though the kiss had been consensual...and Kaito. Once, when he was drunk, and the Togami thing had just happened, and...Shuuichi had just felt too bad to try to tell him no, just letting him do it.

He had no idea if Kaito even remembered that night. He had been obliterated. Either way, the kiss had been wet and sloppy and also, profoundly, uncomfortable. And Shuuichi had never felt any desire to experiment with kissing people after those two incidents.

...kissing Kokichi had...also been uncomfortable...

...in just the best way.

As Shuuichi stared at the page in the textbook, re-reading the same paragraph over and over again, images of Kokichi interrupting his thought process every now and again, he sighed. Pulling at his collar and trying to give himself more air. Why did he favor high collar jackets so much? God he felt stifled...

The rumor mill had been real busy lately. The so-called revolutionaries hadn't done anything too outrageous, though Nao was curious to see if that new brewer would realize that, to get his work out to more people than just handing it out himself, he'd need to get a Food and Safety license, along with an Alcohol Permit, and, to get those, he'd need to get his brew tested... Having a force of wasted college kids would work for a night of chaos, but not for anything bigger.

The Remnants in other countries were a bigger deal, but were also harder to get news on. Though, with what she'd last heard of the situation in Luminary...there might be some big news coming their way soon.

Nao hummed softly to herself, thinking over the state of the world as she reshelved books, catching sight of a reddened Shuuichi Saihara. She hadn't been able to observe him properly, but...there was obviously a change in the young man. A bigger one over time, but also cycles that she'd only been able to catch a glimpse of... It was interesting, and how he was obviously trying to play it off just made her more curious.

Glancing for just a moment at his crotch as she finished up that section...there definitely was something changing.

Allowing her footsteps to be audible, she approached the younger man within his line of sight, giving him a teasing smile. "Hey, are you doing alright? You look a little flushed--if someone didn't catch the title of what you're reading, I'd think it'd be more than just me interrupting you."

Shuuichi practically jumped in his seat, looking up at the librarian with a startled gaze, feeling his eye twitch as this was accompanied with another prickle of arousal (fuck, fuck, he had to get this under control. Is this what puberty had felt like to everyone else!? Fuck, no wonder everyone in highschool had acted like god damn psychopaths) in the motion as well.

Crossing his ankles together and maneuvering his cap to hide his face, he said, "S-sorry...feeling a little under the weather...thought maybe studying somewhere outside of my room might give me the fresh air I need, Miss...I'm sorry, I've lost your name..."

He could've just been stuck in his head, so that was not an observation with any weight. Though, the casual loss of information...interesting.

She waved him off kindly. "Nao Umezaki--I'm the librarian here, in case that's slipped from your mind too. Though...I can understand being preoccupied..."

"It must've been scary, since it was your first time." The look she gave Shuuichi was sympathetic. "Seeing Kokichi collapse like that. I heard that you two were just talking normally and then all of a sudden--!" Nao held up a hand, then let her wrist go limp. "Like nothing, a twenty-year-old is having a heart attack in front of you. Thankfully you Luminary folk are more used to shocking things like that, and you got him help in time, but still..."

"I can't imagine it's just left your mind like nothing," she sighed, looking over the young man kindly, watching carefully to see if he really would blush and squirm more from that. "I know you probably don't want to talk with a stranger, but most of us in the castle would be willing to lend an ear if any of you needed to vent."

He had...been so confused, for an honest second, when she had said it was his 'first time'...how did she know-

Oh, right! Of course! Of course she meant...right! Obviously she didn't mean it was his first time initiating a kiss with someone. That would be super weird, and also incredibly bad, for Shuuichi if that was what she had been talking about. Ha, ha, phew...wow his mind really was on one track right now.

He would tell himself that going upstairs and rubbing one out would help clear his head...but that had literally been the first thing he had done when he woke up. And here it was again...

"U-uh, no, I mean...we're not used to...sorry, I know we have somewhat of a reputation around here, but no, even back in Luminary, seeing someone just collapse for no reason is pretty startling...a-and I'm certain everyone in the castle was concerned about the story when they heard it, s-so it's fine that you'd want to bring it up...there's just not much to talk about, you see?"

Shuuichi angled his head slightly, willing to let himself try to look her in the eye for a second, as he assured her, "I-it really wasn't anything that bad. I-I mean, no, not in the sense of that...that it wasn't bad he collapsed, but, we were already sitting anyway, so it's not like he fell with a thud or anything. If he hadn't...tried to call my name..."

Shuuichi swallowed. Remembering that little half-strangled attempt at 'Shu'...him weakly reaching out to him...Shuuichi the only person in the whole world at that point to know how badly he needed help...

Shuuichi took a deep breath, the sound only shuddering against itself a little as he said, face flushed red, "I-it worked out in the end, so...s-so that's what matters. Right? A-are you close with Kokichi, Miss, um, I mean, Nao? Me and my friends have noticed that we may have given everyone in the castle the wrong impression...if you wanted to come visit him, I'm sure Kokichi would love visitors."

Huh. He had been reading a reference book about poisons, which could describe some intense things, but tended to be, well, medical. Impersonal. She couldn't tell if he'd been getting worked up from the book or something on his mind...but she was onto something with this line. It was almost cute how much he was trying to hold himself together.

Maybe Yasu would find this story interesting too.

"Ah, sorry, my mistake, though, that just makes my point stronger. We're all here to help to the best of our abilities, Mr. Saihara." She smiled, coming a little closer though still staying at a respectful distance. "It worked out, but that doesn't erase that it happened, now does it? That, for a tense moment, Kokichi's fate was entirely in your hands..."

"But, yes! You got help, and he's on his way to recovery," she grinned, actually happy about that. From her observation, it didn't seem like Prince Kaito or Miss Harukawa had noticed anything about Shuuichi that would spur them into action, so perhaps goading the young man with Kokichi's illness wasn't the smartest thing for the Dicean Prince's safety, but...she'd just have to be vigilant, then. Find reasons for people to be nearby while Shuuichi was watching him.

Smiling at the detective's red face, Nao shrugged a bit. "I'm fond of Kokichi--such a cute little bookworm! We don't really talk much outside of discussing novels, though." She sighed deeply, clearly joking in her dismay. "He's outgrown chatting with the local librarian, I'm afraid. Too busy being a little worker bee. I might stop by to say hello when my shift ends, though. Guilt trip him a little into visiting more."

Shuuichi nodded, feeling himself calm down a little with the relatively safe topic, no longer feeling the need to tightly press his legs together as he looked up at the librarian, shifting his hat again to get a better look at her. "I can send him your regards if you like; I have next shift anyway. Me, Maki, and Kaito are taking turns looking after him. It's not hard, he mostly just sleeps...he is kind of cute, isn't he. He's a very sound sleeper..."

...and there we go again. Shuuichi furrowed his brow, determined to pull himself together. He just needed to stop talking about that one particular subject. What was safe to talk about?

"K-kaito's a bit of a bookworm too, though he doesn't seem the type. He gets really into all these different kinds of fiction books. I think he and Kokichi bond over it a little. Honestly, when it gets to a point where Kaito doesn't feel the need to stick by Kokichi's side all the time, I wouldn't be surprised if you and him ended up getting to know each other better, since I'm sure he'll want to spend some time in here in the future… I think, before I met him, he spent literally half his time in the temple, and half his time in the castle library back home. At least that's how he makes it sound."

There...much safer territory. Shuuichi could get through this. The librarian seemed nice, and before all this had started, Shuuichi could have imagined himself genuinely enjoying talking to her. In fact, hadn't Maki said that Nao reminded her of his mentor a little? Shuuichi still wasn't sure if he agreed with that, but she was still interesting to talk to.

It was a shame his fucking dick kept telling him to go back to his room and touch himself. Or touch her. Or touch Kokichi, Kaito, Maki, literally anyone at this point. But Shuuichi couldn't go back to his room or he'd be tempted to take another dose. And the more he took, the worse it would get...

Nao nodded a bit, amused. "I would think so. He stays awake for ages when he's not ill, so I think he just crashes after a bit. Wouldn't wake for the world ending! So, don't worry about holding on to my regards if you're just going to be watching after a sleeping Kokichi. If you need anything to keep you preoccupied through your shift, that is sort of my wheelhouse."

She giggled lightly, and listened in interest through Shuuichi's description of Kaito--she was hoping to study the prince as well at some point, he seemed like an absolute mess, but, compared to the changing subject in front of her, he could wait.

Tilting her head to look at one of the clocks in the library, Nao hummed before taking a risk and gently tilting Shuuichi's face up, making a show of observing his flushed face. "If your shift isn't too soon, could I escort you to the med bay? Or someplace you could lie down? Fresh air is one thing, but, dear, you really are looking like you could do with being horizontal for a while."

Shuuichi had been doing just fine, glancing up at her every now and again under the safety of his cap, breathing slowly and rationalizing his way through how desperately horny he was. He really could have made it through this conversation just fine, he really could have- why was she touching him!?

God, her nails...that was the thing that was sending him for a loop. Not the heat of her fingertips or the fact that, just in general, Shuuichi wasn't used to anyone touching him out of the blue--her nails were just long and pointed enough that they grazed against his skin, and Shuuichi just had this sudden, intense mental image of her digging those fingers against him, getting a grip on him that he wouldn't be able to shake, parts of him tearing away with every movement of her hand...

And being forced to look directly into her face...he felt suddenly so exposed...f-fuck, could she see it on him? How badly he...god, he didn't even know this woman. And she was just...just looking at him and...

Fuck he wanted her to hurt him.

"I...I..." Shuuichi had to swallow hard through the drool that was suddenly piling into the back of his throat, and one of the swallows didn't do the job, and Shuuichi could feel a small spittle of water escape the side of his mouth. Shocked and embarrassed at the feeling of the drool, Shuuichi put his sleeve against it as he stammered out, "S-sorry, I'm sorry, that was...d-do you have a bathroom here?"

Nao snorted a bit of a laugh--the boy was practically trembling. Was literally drooling. She wondered if this was some sort of aphrodisiac, like that woman before had made, or if this was just a side effect. When Shuuichi showed up to dinner that other day, no doubt partaking in that particular brew, he'd looked desperate too. Hmm...she needed more information.

Taking her hand back, just barely grazing her nails back against his jaw, Nao took a step back and gave him a jerk of her head. "Come, come. Let's get you cleaned up, Mr. Saihara. Or...may I call you Shuuichi? Or Shuu--that nickname really is adorable."

She wondered if the bathroom would be enough, or if she could actually get him in his room. On one hand, the bathroom was a public space, and that would surely excite him. On the other, having to hold out until they got upstairs, so close to his friends? She wondered how that fight was going to play out in his head.

Plus, if she got him in his room...she could grab supplies, and make absolutely sure to tire him out to the point she could search his room to her heart's content. Even if he didn't seem like the type that would be able to hold out long, but maybe that was changing too.

"Sh...Shuuichi's fine," the detective muttered, just, hotly arguing with himself. Fuck. He had been more or less constantly horny for days now...that was why he had been stupid enough to risk himself by touching Kokichi. But other than that one moment, he had really thought he was handling the constant itch of wanting to touch and be touched pretty well.

And literally just the smallest graze of another person...w-was this normal!?

Ya know...for a given value of 'normal'.

Itch had said that he didn't know anyone else who literally took the pollen every single day. That in his experience, it was a party drug, that you should only drink his brew when you were ready and available to feel, and then indulge, all the effects of it. Shuuichi remembered Itch being shocked at the idea of taking a little bit every single day. "Sounds like a good way to lose your mind," the man had said, raising an eyebrow at the detective. "Though you don't look like you've lost it yet, so maybe that's something. Next time we talk, I want you to be ready to tell me all about this experiment of yours. If microdosing a little every day works...might be something to think about with my own recipe."

Shuuichi...w-would have to add this to his list of symptoms. He remembered using the term 'frog in boiling water' already once in the journal, and he was starting to realize that the analogy might be more apt then he had originally suspected. He hadn't realized how desperate his need was getting right up until the heat took a sudden jump. And only now was Shuuichi realizing how out of control it was getting.

It didn't matter. It didn't matter. He'd just get into the bathroom, rub one out real quick, and then get out of here. It'd be...

Shuuichi looked at the sign above the door with something bordering on panic...

...public??

"...d...sorry, this is e-embarrassing, but...again, I'm not feeling well... do, do you have a private bathroom anywhere?" Shuuichi murmured shyly, not able to look at the librarian at all as the back of his neck burned hot at the request.

As fun as it'd be to coax him into the public restroom, if she pushed, then that was his room out of reach. So Nao gave him a sympathetic smile and gently turned the young man around, putting her hand on the--absolutely burning--back of his neck as she guided him forward.

"If you're really feeling this bad... If you can make it, I'd feel better taking you to your room, Shuu. Make sure you get there alright, and I could stop by the medical wing to get something that might sort you out..." She could hear the slight edge in her voice as she moved her hand down to his lower back, interested to see how much he was capable of resisting. "Then, well, it's your room--your bed is right there, and you can lie down and rest."

The fact he wore dark clothes was definitely going to help him, but the bulge in his pants was there if you looked--she wondered if he would be concerned that people were going to see. Though, if he was, then she wondered if that concern was still there even when he was flaccid. Over the past couple weeks, the fabric around his crotch had definitely been getting tighter, and not due to a laundry accident, unless they'd been gradually shrinking his pants with every wash.

Or was it something he even noticed?

"Don't you worry, Shuu--I know how to take care of more than just books."

Shuuichi's head dipped lower, his body jerking slightly as now her whole hand was on his neck, steering him away. Why did she keep touching him!? ...of course, he had said he was sick. She was probably just concerned about him, and Diceans were...helpful. Weirdly so. If Shuuichi actually had been sick, he would have probably felt like her attention was reassuring.

A-and it wasn't like she had any idea what all these touches were doing to him, anyway.

...F-fuck, she was right though. He should just go back to his room. He could get himself taken care of there, and...and once he was done he would leave again. He wouldn't even look in his poison bag's direction.

"Y-you don't have to, Nao. I-I'll be okay getting upstairs. I'm not about to pass out or..." Shuuichi felt his voice leave him, staring at his feet as her hand moved, Shuuichi not even knowing what to say now. Just quietly allowing him to be led as every nerve in his body screamed abuse at him.

See, the issue for Shuuichi here, was that as much as he saw sex in everyone else right now...he was still too new to the whole idea to actually see himself as a sexual being. The idea that someone could look at him and recognize anything sexual about him was a baffling concept, not much unlike Kokichi's first realization of it. Sure, his face was bright red, but no one could possibly guess that was because he was aroused. His pants were tight against him, but there was no way anyone would be looking there. S-sure, the way Nao was talking sounded...a little suggestive. But there was no way she meant it that way.

It was just...not something that was possible in his world view.

The two made their way up to the third floor, Shuuichi mostly watching his feet, muttering little apologies to Nao for her having to take him up to his room, feeling a little better at the effort of moving up the stairs...and then growing flustered again as her hand would suddenly just...appear. Somewhere else. With such perfect timing that if Shuuichi didn't obviously know better, he'd say she was doing it on purpose.

Nao gently assured the young man that she didn't mind, and while he would likely be just fine going to his room himself, she wanted to see him off for her own peace of mind, if he would allow that selfishness. Really, it was just because she was so used to seeing people push themselves too hard--Shuuichi was young and inexperienced in Dicea, she wanted to make perfectly sure he'd be just fine.

Before they left the library, she grabbed her messenger bag, a movement so natural that it didn't even break their stride, and she was right back at his side, guiding him forward.

She managed to keep him wound on the trip, but now would be the moment of truth--if she could actually get into his room. Shuuichi seemed determined to keep his arousal private, but, if her guess was right, then...maybe being called out on it would make him so horny he'd beg for her to come in and not tell anyone else.

So, as they got to his door--thankfully no one else was in the hall, not even the little assassin-trainee that liked to hide behind corners--Nao crouched down to Shuuichi's height and put the back of her hand against his cheek, seemingly checking his ambient temperature, while her voice lowered, dropping to a murmur.

"Honestly, Shuu...I'm surprised you made it up here. Your cock looks like it's about to pop your fly, you look so needy. Are you sure you can take care of it yourself?" He didn't actually look like he was that hard, but making it seem like that was what anyone looking at him would think would be the push to make or break this.

Shuuichi's eyes went wide...very wide, a full body shudder going up and down his spine at the heat of her palm, of her words...his nerves shooting through him in shock as a nervous, stupid giggle bubbled out of him, Shuuichi covering his mouth with his hand to hide it. His excitement fighting with his baffled, stunned realization that...sh-she could tell!?

W-what!?

Shuuichi's hands trembled against his mouth, his mind racing, trying to think through the haze of lust as he looked up at her, trying to...had he misunderstood or...no, no, there was no way he had misunderstood that. Was she making fun of him? That made more sense to him than this...look in her eyes...

...was...was she offering?

Shuuichi couldn't even comprehend that idea. Every time he thought about appeasing the need in him, he always thought in terms of using his own hands, or making some desperate, self-destructive pass at one of his friends. The idea of doing it with a stranger...Shuuichi hadn't even considered it as a possibility...b-but here was someone, just...just offering?

Fuck, was this what Kaito felt like, all the time? It was so f-flattering and exciting... How could...how could Shuuichi say no?

"U-uh...um..." Shuuichi realized he wouldn't be able to say it looking at her, so he grabbed the top of his cap and pulled it down over his face, saying quietly back to her, "Um...y-you can come in if you want...b-but my friend Maki lives next door... I-I don't know how thin the walls are...s-sorry, that's a weird thing to point out, isn't it," Shuuichi said, his face burning red, feeling foolish and fuck was this really going to be his first time!?

Not wanting anyone to see him, Shuuichi went to unlock his door, fumbling with the key only a moment before managing to get it unlocked.

Aw, that was kinda cute. She'd had a guess, but...was he really a virgin? Nao...felt bad about that, actually. Virginity was a construct, but for his first time having that kind of vulnerability around someone...there was something sweet about having that with someone you trusted.

But he'd been dancing around with foolish, destructive nihilists and was likely doing something else quite dangerous so...she would just hope he'd find someone in the future to help him through things. And it wasn't like she wasn't going to care for him.

"If I'm not mistaken, this is usually around the time Miss Harukawa trains with young Mr. Timothy in the courtyard, is it not? And if she comes back early...well, you can be quiet, right?" The walls were pretty damn thick, but the fear of having his friend hear him might work for what she was aiming for.

As soon as they entered Shuuichi's room, Nao didn't let her eyes wander, confident she'd get to look around later, and instead grabbed a firm handful of his ass, giving it a sudden squeeze. "Now...why don't you stop embarrassing yourself and give your pants a break, dear. They look far too tight to be comfortable...unless that's why you like them."

Shuuichi hadn't had much reason to think about it before, but he was suddenly firmly aware of the height difference between them. He had never found himself intimidated by taller women before, but right now, in this particular situation... "Y-yeah...I can be quiet..."

Shuuichi practically jumped at her squeeze against his backside, a small surprised, "Hn!" sound hissing through his teeth, along with another wave of arousal...but not at the touch. He was finding himself aroused at how suddenly...lost he felt. Shy and a little stupid and suddenly just wanting to explain to her his inexperience, apologize in advance for how bad he was no doubt going to be at this.

He fought that urge, suspecting that telling this older woman that she was going to be his first would be...mostly just uncomfortable. He was almost afraid she'd leave if she found out, disturbed by this grown man who'd never been touched like this before. What a fucking loser...

Shuuichi grit his teeth, trying not to think about it, taking his belt off with trembling hands and, hesitating only a moment (shit, shit, maybe this was a bad idea, what was he doing) he kicked off his pants, thinking as he did so...should he try to kiss her? Did she want him to kiss her? No, but she probably did want him to take off his underwear...Shuuichi put his hands on his waistband, suddenly hesitating, caught by nervousness. "U-um...m-maybe we should turn o-off the lights...?"

Hm...she hadn't seen him naked before, so it was just a guess but...he definitely seemed bigger down there than she'd noticed when he first came to the castle. She was definitely leaning on some kind of aphrodisiac, then, or at least something with similar properties.

Laughing at his nervousness, she raised an eyebrow down at Shuuichi, quickly tapping a finger against the peak of the bulge in his briefs. "Nervous, hun? With this monster, I'd think you'd have nothing to worry about, though...everyone knows it's about how you use it."

Coming closer to him, Nao slid Shuuichi's shirt up his--surprisingly defined--abdomen a bit, gripping his waist firmly as she ducked to look him more in the eye. "Could it be that you don't know how to use it, dear? With how much you've been squirming and pressing your hands to your lap, well...then that's only self-experimentation, isn't it."

"In that case, I think you'd need all the information you can get. In fact..." Nao did look around for a moment then, before finding a floor-length mirror and urging Shuuichi towards it. "Here. With this, you won't miss a thing."

Shuuichi took a shuddering breath, trying to duck his head down again as she sought out his gaze, finding it too difficult to look her directly in the eye as he realized...she had guessed it anyway. His inexperience was that obvious. "S-sorry..." Shuuichi muttered, his whole body trembling now as he felt her hands move up his stomach, something inside of him starting to burn at her attention despite (because of) how embarrassed he felt to be called out like that.

He should touch her back, right? H-he was the guy in this situation, he should be...trying to take control, r-right? Even with their difference in experience? He should take her shirt off or...where were they going?

As he let her lead him to the mirror, he mostly looked at it in confusion, not sure... "W-wait, what are we doing?" he asked, standing in front of the mirror but looking to her for some guidance, brow furrowed in concern.

"Shuu, darling, I'm positive you know what sex is...unless you've just been rubbing yourself in confusion, wondering why your pee-pee feels weird." She rolled her eyes, using a patronizing voice as she lightly dragged her nails down to his crotch, giving his still-clothed bulge a light squeeze and jiggle.

"You've been walking around looking so desperate, it's a little sad...so I've decided to help you out. Don't worry," she purred, leaning down to his ear, nipping at the shell as she dipped her hand to jiggle his plump-feeling balls. "We'll empty you out, so Shuu can feel better. And you'll be watching the whole time, so you can learn to do it yourself one day."

With a snort she snapped his waistband against his skin, the little "thwack" sound seeming loud in the quiet room. "But, if you still can't figure it out, I suppose I could help you again." She then gave the very bottom cusp of a buttcheek a firm pinch. "Now, on your knees and take your shirt off."

Shuuichi found himself ducking under his cap at her open mockery, stammering out, "N-no, that's not what I...sorry, I didn't mean it like that, I-I know what we're, I just meant with the m-mirror-hhHN!?"

This was a terrible idea. This was a terrible idea, and Shuuichi was just starting to comprehend that as he felt her fingers roughly take a spot on Shuuichi that, to his knowledge, no one had ever touched before. He wasn't ready for something like this. He should ask her to leave, and just take care of himself, like he always did.

...but as she bit his ear and whispered seemingly straight into his skull, her voice sounding so loud, just because her lips were so close against his eardrum, she pointed out all the reasons he had invited her in in the first place. Especially as his cock twitched and jumped, longer these days then it had ever been before, though Shuuichi hadn't thought to look until Seiko had pointed out to him that growth was a possibility and hadn't known what to do with the new length other than find it amusing and use two hands now where one had worked before.

He wanted to tell her he knew how to touch himself, that h-he just didn't know how to touch her, that he was sorry, but please be patient with him, please be kind...but couldn't bring himself to say any of that...because he didn't think he actually wanted any of that, a violent shiver going through him as the sting of the waistband against his skin and her cold, mocking tone...

And then a pain on his backside, one that lingered longer than was friendly. "Ah! Ah, okay! Okay!" Feeling almost dizzy, Shuuichi got down on his knees, facing her, not being able to see past her knees due to his ball cap, and not sure he wanted to, suddenly feeling small. But he wouldn't be able to avoid her gaze forever, not if he had to take his shirt off...so he took off his cap and pulled his shirt above his head and put them aside, glancing up at her for a moment and just...she hadn't taken anything off yet. It was just him kneeling there in his underwear while she looked at him...

Okay. Okay. He had to start participating, right? She was going to get bored of him if he just sat there like an idiot. He should...he reached out his arm to grab her skirt, intending to start to lift it...

Shuuichi, involuntarily, found himself pulling his arm back and covering his eyes with his hands, unable to stand feeling her gaze above him while he was this nervous, knowing he looked like an idiot and saying in a rush, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I don't know what I'm doing. I-if you just tell me what you want me to do I-I'll do it, but I don't know what I'm doing!"

Taking a bit of pity on him, Nao knelt as well, though she still towered over him. With a sharp, teasing look, she started unbuttoning her shirt, exposing her chest. "That's pretty clear, darling. You don't have a single clue about what you're doing--that's why I have to help you."

...it wasn't that much pity. Running a hand through his hair, Nao tugged on his scalp gently and nudged his head forward, giving him the option to press his face into her breasts. "You looked like you were about to tug yourself off in the middle of the library--if someone joined in, well, you'd just make a fool of yourself, not just to them, but to everyone watching. You're lucky Kokichi is ill at the moment--imagine if Prince Kaito was in the library? Imagine if he saw how clueless you are to such a basal activity?"

She ran her other hand down his side and around his front, groping his member mostly gently, but with occasional roughness.

"Talk to me, Shuu. How are you feeling right now? Being touched for the first time."

Shuuichi had been having an impossible time looking at her face, but as her shirt fell away into two parts, her breasts, round and pink and full, were a little less intimidating to look at, Shuuichi considering what he should do when he suddenly felt her fingers in his hair, pushing him forward. Deciding this meant she wanted something from him, Shuuichi put his hands up and onto her waist to steady himself, before putting little kisses against her skin.

H...had it really been that obvious? She had known all the way down in the library? Had everyone known? He had thought he was doing a good job controlling himself...

As she grabbed at his dick, a small gasp of surprise fell out of him, Shuuichi resting his head against her chest as he shivered, trembling against her touch. Unwittingly, he found himself unable to bear the feeling of his briefs against him anymore, wanting to make himself more available to her touch. So he took his hands off her waist and pushed his underwear down, lifting one knee and then the other, taking it off and casting it aside, now just fully naked for her.

...Kaito...Kaito wouldn't have...he wouldn't judge Shuuichi for being inexperienced. He knew this about Shuuichi. Kaito wouldn't make him feel bad about it...but still Shuuichi found himself closing his eyes, his heartbeat upticking at the thought of Kaito finding him down in the library instead...his friendly gaze and gentle hands taking Shuuichi aside and saying, 'Hey, bro, look...let me help you with that...'

Shuuichi gripped his hands into fists. No. That wouldn't happen. That was never going to happen now. Because Shuuichi had missed his chance years ago and now Kaito was married...to that sleeping, sickly doll that Shuuichi had stolen a kiss from in his sleep...a small revenge for getting to have what was now forever denied to him...

Shuuichi swallowed hard at this memory of this recent, pretty, petty revenge, amplified as this strong, terrifying woman touched and pawed at him...feeling more confident, remembering how it felt to take what he wanted from Kokichi for that few seconds he had him, Shuuichi forced himself to look up at Nao, saying, "I...I feel good...you're kind of scary...but I think I l-like that..."

She couldn't help snorting at the surprisingly sweet kisses against her chest. In a different time, he probably would've had a lovely, gentle, cute first time. What a shame. Though, her hold on the situation was broken in its seriousness for a moment as a genuine laugh came out of her mouth. "God, that's what my wife says. I've become my own stereotype..."

She shook her head a little before leering down at Shuuichi, her amused mirth shifting into something sharper. "May as well lean into it, then."

His legs were slightly parted from ridding himself of his underwear, and Nao took advantage of that to hook a hand around a thigh, spinning him around to face the mirror, his engorged cock swaying with the movement. She could spot faint stretch marks...so he had grown quickly, which likely made him more sensitive too. His glans looked slightly swollen, something that...maybe was a permanent feature? She wondered if his prostate had been enlarged as well.

Something that made people sex machines?

Starting to rake her nails a little harder against the soft bit of his inner thigh, Nao breathed along his neck, taking a nipple in her other hand and pinching it sharply. "So, Shuu likes being scared? I hope you won't shut your eyes in fear, then--watch your body, see how you react. Maybe one of these days you'll catch on and someone won't have to help you get off."

She pressed her tongue against his jugular, then nipped just next to it, roughly rolling his nipple around in her fingers. "Or maybe you want to be dumb and helpless, so people keep having to touch you. We can start a new shift rotation, making sure to empty Shuu of his juice. Just like feeding a baby."

Shuuichi had found himself starting to get into a comfortable rhythm at her touch against him, panting slightly as he looked up at her, his cock stiffening and starting to ache under her attention as Shuuichi started to reach out, ready to try to touch her breasts, to give back a little...but hesitated, a bit of news honestly surprising him out of his haze a little.

Wife?

Shuuichi had no time to reflect on this though, nor could he follow through on his decision to touch her back, just managing to get out a "W-wait!" before suddenly finding himself spinning.

...was...was that what he looked like?

Shuuichi wasn't in the habit of looking at himself naked in the mirror. Honestly, he found his own gaze usually as difficult to maintain as other people’s, and his morning routine was so practiced that he rarely had to actually examine his appearance in any meaningful way, but...

...but this...this wasn't how he usually looked. Was it?

He looked...perverted. Disturbing. His face was bright red, and he could see beads of sweat at his hairline, which he now felt upon noticing them, the small cooling drops going down his face as his mouth, fuck, close your mouth!

"Ha...ha...hr~m!" Shuuichi, embarrassed by the way he hadn't realized his mouth was hanging open, made an attempt to close it, his tongue feeling weirdly dry against the roof of his mouth...but he couldn't maintain it as he felt the light rake and then the sharp pinch against his chest, his nipples (they...they haven't always been that round, have they?) causing his mouth to hang open again, desperately trying to breathe through his arousal as he put his hands around her wrist and forearm in alarm, trying to push her off his nipples. "Wait, wait, please, that's...that's too m-much!"

Shuuichi couldn't help but close his eyes as he felt her tongue run against his neck, now just entirely shivering and trembling under her touch, trying to keep his volume under control as he hummed into the back of his throat. He couldn't shout while he was in here...Maki might recognize what he was doing...but even worse, she might not...what if she thought he was in pain and...

"Please, please, s...s-slow down...huh...ha?"

He didn't understand what she was saying. "I'm not...I'm not helpless...j-just let me try..." Shuuichi said quietly, turning his face away from the mirror, the side of his face pressing against her breast, he said desperately, "...D-don't you want me to touch you too... I c-can't m-make you feel good if I'm facing this way, right...? Please...hern, o-o-OH!" Shuuichi's eyes widened as the way she twisted his nipple suddenly heightened the fire in him, his cock lifting itself high and easy. Not wanting to make any more noise than that, Shuuichi stopped trying to push her arm away, covering his mouth and closing his eyes against what his body was doing.

He seemed to be reacting relatively normally to arousal, if a little overwhelmed, but if it was his first time, then that made sense. It was going to be a fine line, then, making him uncomfortable enough to maintain his arousal but not just straight out raping him.

She shushed him softly, taking her hand out from between his legs but--ah. Now that was a sound. She was going to let his nipple go, but, if he liked it that much... Nao just moved onto his unstimulated one--though it was already perked--rolling and pinching at it.

"Don't worry about me, Shuu, I just want to make you feel good, okay? And, c'mon, none of that," she tapped a finger against his sweaty temple, "Look at yourself. This is what you look like, dear--face it." This is what the changes had done to him. "How will you ever learn if you can't look at yourself?"

Opening her bag with the hand not playing with his hard, becoming round and puffy nipple, Nao popped open a tube of lubricant, reaching back around Shuuichi to squeeze a bit onto his rising cock. But, before going for it, she simply placed a finger against his reddened, swollen glans, pressing into his hole a bit.

That sting against his chest had felt...so fucking good...that little, honest bit of pain, sending shockwaves of pleasure through him...fuck.

Seiko had...she had said this was going to happen, hadn't she...th-that his wires were going to get all messed up...that stress was going to be linked to happiness, and happiness to sex...that was it, right? That was why that little twist had felt so good...

He wanted to stay quiet because he didn't want Maki to come in. He was afraid to look at himself in the mirror because eye contact had always been a difficult thing for him, even before the Despair Pollen.

But the pain...when Shuuichi felt her fingers, with her long, dangerous nails, press into his hole...

He looked back up at her, a haze coming over him as he said, almost breathlessly, "Is...is it going to hurt?"

Shuuichi knew enough to know that something like this could hurt. Had heard Kaito rant about that sort of thing before. How selfish, uncaring partners could hurt the ones they were supposed to be trying to pleasure in the act...

A bout of excitement went through Shuuichi, and, reaching down to touch himself, running his hand up and down his cock, making use of her lube, he leaned back into her touch, a small, sharp, lustful smile reflecting back at him in the mirror that he couldn't see because he was looking back up at her, eyes hazy with lust at the mere possibility of what could be coming.

Like in the library, he felt a sudden, small spittle of drool escape from the tip of his mouth, though he wasn't aware of it yet as he slowly, carefully massaged his cock, feeling the heat in him boil as he whispered shyly, "I-it's okay if it does...p...please...i-it feels good when you hurt me..."

There. There were masochists, of course, but with all the other evidence... She wouldn't injure him, of course. But she could make him hurt.

She laughed softly, giving his head a pinch before sliding her hand alongside his, gathering up some lube. "I told you I'm going to take care of you, Shuu. I'll make you feel good. Better than you've ever felt, ineffectively rutting against yourself."

Pulling his legs apart more, Nao held Shuuichi with her grip across his chest, roughly rolling his nipple and pressing the side of her nail into the tip. "First, I'm going to take you like this, so Shuu can watch himself feel real pleasure. I do want to get you on your back, on your hands and knees, ass in the air...hun, you haven't felt anything until you've done it upside-down. Just keep telling me how you feel."

She wasn't sure how many times his body was going to have him cum, and his large, plump balls weren't a good indicator either. But she was going to fuck him until he was good and tired out, and she would have free reign.

Circling what she assumed was his never-before-touched anus, she teased with the pad of her finger a few times, feeling the sphincter twitch, before she shoved a slick finger into him.

One of the fingers she kept the nail trimmed down on. She wasn't going to stab him.

As she felt him shudder against her (and he was still being, just, so reserved. So quiet. She supposed that made sense for the polite, shy boy she had met weeks ago who had asked over her injuries. She wondered what it would take to make him scream), moving her finger inside and feeling around at...for someone who had most likely never been touched like this before, the inside of his ass already felt both swollen and loose. If that was always the case, no wonder he had gotten horny just sitting down in the library. She wondered if he even recognized how every movement in his lower body, from walking to sitting, had likely been adding friction and stimulating his prostate inside him. A constant stream of small stimulation.

More evidence that the thing he was on was meant to prep a person for sex?

All the evidence so far suggested that was the case, but...why would an adult virgin take something like that? Or, maybe more aptly, why would an adult virgin take something like that, without apparently any actual plan to take care of it? It was early in the morning and the Luminary escort had seemed entirely willing to go back to his room alone, had she not pressed the issue. What was the point of doing this to himself then, if not to heighten the pleasure of sex, beyond just touching himself? That was certainly why all the college students at the brewery took it during their weekend parties; they all fully intended to fuck each other until they couldn't anymore.

But a person by themselves on a random weekday morning?

As she explored his insides some more, she noticed that, as he squirmed and huffed beneath her, his eyes were closed again. Still unable to look at himself. So, actively asking her to hurt him, but genuinely unable to stand the discomfort of seeing himself. Let's explore that some more.

Nao made a display of sighing, pulling her finger out unceremoniously and wiping it off on his back as she said, "Honestly, dear, you're not going to learn anything if you keep going away in your head like that. From now on, Shuu, every time I look up and see you not looking at yourself, I'm just going to stop, since otherwise you seem determined to waste my time. At some point, I might just leave."

This was a total bluff, of course; she hadn't come all the way up here to bow out now. And in fact, a new position entered her head to try out as she took a break from fingering him.

"On your ass, Shuu, like that, yes...don't fight me now, just go where I lead. There we go," she said, guiding him out of his kneeling position and sitting him on his backside, as she sat as well, right behind him, her legs out on either side of him, knees up, her skirt rising up a little to accommodate. Leaning Shuuichi back so that his back was pressed entirely against her, she took one of his legs and brought it up and around her knee, and then the other one around the other knee.

The end result was Shuuichi leaning back against her, facing the mirror, his legs spread high and wide and his ass, dick and balls all easily exposed, a full and complete view for both of them to see.

"Aww, look at that, Shuu," she whispered into his ears, pointing at his lusting, helpless gaze in the mirror, "You make a very pretty whore."

Reaching over to put her finger (again, her non-sharpened one. She didn't want to do actual damage to him, and treating that area roughly would likely make him bleed) back into his hole, grabbing his dick with her other hand, she said into his ear again, "Now watch, Shuu. This is how you touch yourself."

Shuuichi felt himself shiver violently at the sharpness pressed into his nipple and he felt a whine building in the back of his throat that he tried to swallow down, along with another mouthful of saliva. For both, he wasn't that successful, and the drip of spit from the corner of his mouth dripped down a little more.

It didn't help that Nao was promising to keep this going again, and again, and again...

Seiko had said nymphomaniac...a sex addict...and Shuuichi found that the idea didn't bother him.

"g-ahh--!" He choked as he felt her push into...s-somewhere else he'd never been touched before, and...it didn't hurt as much as he was expecting. And he was...disappointed? He'd expected it to feel searing, tearing, but instead...it felt like she'd pushed in easily, her nail--no way this is what those claws felt like--not catching on anything. Instead...he felt like he could take more, more than just another finger too, something that would really stretch him, make him really struggle to suck it in like his ass was already doing...

Shuuichi felt his dick throb with every little movement in his rear and he started stroking himself faster, shaking and puffing small gasps of air, feeling this woman barely do anything to stimulate him and--

And?

She pulled her finger out?

He blinked his eyes open, still not looking at the mirror, but looking at Nao in confusion, and then in shame and fear that only made his dick twitch. "I-I'm sorry...I'm not - P-please don't leave! I'll l-look, I'll look!"

Even if the position she put him in was...really hard to look at. Shuuichi looked off to both his sides nervously, but forced his gaze to lock onto the mirror, unable to stand the idea of not being touched anymore. And...

...really...that couldn't be him...right?

His entire body was glistening with sweat now, his blush traveling down to his chest, and...h-his nipples...even the areola was swollen, his nipples dark pink, round and puffy... A sudden thought came to him, if his growth would include male breasts too...and he couldn't stifle a giggle, not that his face looked like he was even a bit displeased with the idea.

The grin on his face was wide and wet and lewd, drool dripping from his lips that he tried to lick up in embarrassment, his eyes wide and round and...begging...

...his dick looked even bigger from this new angle and the pink swollen hole beneath...he wanted to fuck it...he wanted to fuck himself. A depraved act that made him giggle breathlessly and squirm, trying to remind himself to be quiet, Maki would hear--

...hear a whore?

He'd never been fucked before, but...that person in the mirror...

His lust was so...pure. So genuine and overwhelming and fierce. It was fascinating. And alarming. Nao had observed one of the parties at the brewery, going there in mild disguise and just leaning against a far wall, watching the madness unfurl around her. People, kids, really, acting insane towards each other, beating and bruising and cutting each other, all in the name of a lust that had consumed them...and even still, she couldn't recall anyone looking quite like Shuuichi. Whatever was happening to him, Nao suddenly realized it...might genuinely be unique. Or, a rare enough occurrence as to make her observation of him even more thrilling. A truly unique, beautiful specimen...

Nao felt a thrill go through her...and also frustration.

She had to be...careful. With this. She was a 'changed' woman after all. And as easy as she was starting to think it would be to do so, she couldn't...push this boy over the edge, just for the fun of watching him fall. Observation without destruction, if you would. Which was so much harder than most people took for granted. Everyone in the world of research lived with the burden of knowing that observing a subject always had an inherent side effect of influencing it...

But even more important than that, she didn't want to waste this second chance she had been given. And if she seriously hurt this boy in her attempt to study him, as forgiving as the boss and his son were...Nao had a feeling the Luminary Prince and Little Miss Assassin wouldn't be so quick to let it go.

So, yes...careful now.

As Nao pushed her finger into Shuuichi, she, again, frowned at the ease in which it took her in. This wouldn't be enough to get the boy any closer to that edge she couldn't kick him off of. Nao sighed. "Honestly, you're pretty disappointing so far, aren't you dear? Maybe this is why no one's ever wanted to touch you before. At least not seriously enough to convince you. If I shoved my whole hand into you, would you even feel it? Your body is disgusting, really. How lucky you are I'm taking pity on you...and yet, you don't thank me?"

Nao tsked, took the head of Shuuichi's dick and balls in her hand, her nails digging against the ballsack, and (curious to see how honest this request for pain actually was) twisted.

...he just hadn't been interested, before. Kaito had even said that! Like that girl at the party--he wasn't...he wasn't disgusting. Undesirable. But...he'd understood what Nao had said at his door. If someone really wanted him...wouldn't they have made it obvious? Kaito certainly hadn't found any trouble understanding the advances on him...most of the time.

His body was changing from the pollen, he knew that, Seiko had confirmed it, but...was there a part of this that had been in him all along? Had people been able to sense it, and that was why... H-he didn't have enough data to know...

Groaning at the idea of having her whole hand in him, his insides throbbed and Shuuichi started to babble, still trying to keep quiet. "Pl-please, I'm sorry, thank you, tha-thank you, I can do better! Just tell me - umf - a-and I'll do anything! Please, I--AAAH - AAA~!!!"

Shuuichi screamed as the pain rocketed through him as an orgasm, cumming against Nao's hand, his rear practically suckling and slurping at her finger, and he could feel a drip of something start to leak out of him. The person in the mirror looked crazed, bearing into exposing their parts for all to see - fuck Maki was next door she'd hear she'd come in and see him -

So?

She loved him, wanted him to be happy. And seeing the sloppy whore open for sex was...the happiest he'd ever been.

...Oooo-kay. The request for pain was legitimate, apparently.

Nao looked at the mess on her hands and laughed, shaking her head as she, through the mirror, showed Shuuichi what he had done to her hands, his mess of cum and...what was that actually coming out of his ass? At first she had thought maybe the poor boy had had an accident during his orgasm, but that...

...was his ass self lubricating?? With what!??

Nao took a closer look at the semi-clear liquid that had spilled onto her hand that had been fingering him, openly confused and, just, so fascinated. Whatever the boy was doing to himself...it was having serious consequences for his body. Why had he done this??

Those were questions for later. For now, the most useful thing she could do was tire him out and send him to sleep. Which, it was starting to look like, based on how he had just cum and how thick and full his cock still was, was going to take some doing.

"How rude," Nao laughed, leaning forward and showing both of her hands to Shuuichi now, her breasts resting around his neck, her own nipples erect at her own excitement at this experiment. "Look what you did, Shuu. Do you think this is normal? Clean off my hands, apologize for the mess you made, and then wait here while I decide how I want to punish you."

This was the best he'd ever felt...and he wanted more. Normally (normal for the past two weeks) when he'd quickly, furiously get himself off, he'd find some relief and go on with his day...until he'd find himself worked back up maybe an hour or two later if he was lucky. Now, it was like instead of his fire being doused, it was a match that had been tossed into a pool of gasoline, and the utter need in him was so thick Shuuichi almost felt like he could chew it.

Shuuichi blearily looked over Nao's hands, recognizing semen, obviously, but...what was on her other hand? Had...had he started to sweat so much he was pooling it? He certainly felt wet...

Thoughts of writing this down were pushed to the back of his mind as Shuuichi opened his mouth and started to lick at the older woman's hands, his thighs shaking at the prospect of a punishment and the shame of eating his own semen and sweat. Though...it didn't really taste like sweat...

"Shorry...m sorry..." he pleaded as he licked and sucked, his dick still high and twitching. The clear liquid was a little sticky, almost...mucus-y? And it didn't taste like much besides sex...his sex...eating his own drippings...

"Unnn..." Shuuichi whimpered as he felt himself throb, saw a-a small gush of something leave his hole and pool on the floor. "Pl-please...Miss, u-uh... Nao. Punish me."

"'Miss Nao', hm?" Nao mused to herself, waiting for her hands to be mostly cleaned before wiping the rest off in Shuuichi's hair, getting up with a small stretch as she left her experiment where he sat. "Well, that's more tasteful than 'mistress' or something silly like that. I could get used to that. Be right back, Shuu."

She already had one item in mind right away, going to Shuuichi's pants and, with a tug, freed his belt from the pant loops, examining the thin strip of black leather, bending it in two and then giving it a strong SLAP against her own, scarred arm to see if it would do the trick. Yeah...that would work.

Then she headed to her bag.

She had known that she wanted to try this experiment on Shuuichi for a while now, and while she hadn't been sure when she was going to try for it, she had kept her bag near her for the last several days now, stocked with whatever she may have needed. But, as she looked through the bag and the wonderful variety of toys inside, she realized that she had severely underestimated the state of Shuuichi's body--the largest dildo she had brought was clearly going to be inadequate. She'd have to be better prepared next time. Hmmm...though, at least she still had her bent sounding rod. The design was meant to discourage ejaculation, as it made erections hurt more often than not, but, well...for the Luminary escort, it would probably actually help things along. So she grabbed one of those, and then looked around the room...hmmm...

The detective had a few things just...laying around, especially on his bookshelf. If she had to guess, it was more case memorabilia than things he was expecting to use in his work here. An extremely cheap trophy for getting top place in some swimming competition, with someone else's name on it, what had to be a gag magnifying glass, the thing overly large and ornate and sitting next to stereotypical detective’s hat, and...hmm...

She grabbed the open handcuffs, shoving all these items into various pockets in her skirt. She went back to Shuuichi, who was still sitting there, looking at himself in the mirror, though he looked up at her when he realized she was coming back, his need and desire still apparent. She reached down, grabbed around his knee, and spun him around on his ass.

She ran her hand up his leg, grabbing at his ankle, holding his leg up, and though he was half leaning back already, she took her high, thick heels and (restraining herself not to bruise him) kicked his chest, pushing him down on his back.

Kicking his other leg to the side a bit and keeping her grip on his ankle, spreading him, Nao sneered down at Shuuichi. "You were so rude. And here I am being so good to you. You know, I thought about giving you a safety word, but honestly, I don't care if you want me to stop. Though if you're polite and grateful, I may decide to be generous."

She took the belt out of her pocket, it still bent in half, and then, using her thick, high heel, she stepped down onto Shuuichi's crotch, digging the heel into his pulsing, sensitive ass (that was still...leaking?? With something???), grinding her ankle up and down against him, pressing into his cock and balls in one movement and digging her long heel inside of him the next.

Taking the belt, she said, almost gently, "Now, tell me what you did to deserve this," before quickly, with a loud, THWACK, whipping it against the bottom of his foot.

Shuuichi stayed right where he was, having a slightly harder time keeping his legs spread now that Nao's knees weren't keeping them in place. But...she hadn't told him to close his legs, so.

God...his room stunk with sex...and it was all from him. No one else's scent to indulge in, though he was still enjoying his own... He wished he still had Kaito's boxers in his hamper, even if they'd be older. ...Kaito was right down the hall, looking over Kokichi...would...would they be able to smell him all the way over there? Maki would be able to hear him, but...would the whole hall know what he was doing?

Shuuichi jumped at the sudden sound of a slap, his cock twitching in anticipation.

He spun around easily, the liquid from his ass making the change in position easy which...he wished it had burnt, a bit. Though, Miss Nao, the terrifying librarian, made up for it immediately, kicking him onto his back, making him grunt a little even as his nethers pulsed, still on full display.

And...she looked disgusted by him. His wet, swollen body, still eager to be fucked. "Y-you make me feel s-so good, I-I'm sorry, Miss Nao! Please, j-just...please don't stop!" Shuuichi felt like he'd die if the librarian stopped touching him, and that feeling just made him more desperate.

Enough that, with a choked sound, his dick spurted a little more as she stepped on him, starting to fuck him with her heel, his hole eager and readily accepting the larger insertion. His toes curled and Shuuichi felt his hands shaking--what was he even doing with his hands? Unsure, he brought them to his ignored for too long chest, feeling out his swollen, sensitive nubs, though...not for any analysis. Just for the feeling.

And pinched them sharply as he flinched, more goo leaving his cock as he moaned from the sharp whip against his foot, his leg shaking in Nao's grip. "I-I-I came?"

This time, she hit hard against the back of his thigh, the impact of the belt leaving a long, red mark against him. "You think that's all? No, Shuu, dear. I'm not upset you came. I'm upset," she said, whipping him again, a new red line lower (or, higher, based on your perspective), "That you were ugly when you came. Honestly, it was horrifying. Did you do it on purpose? Did you want me to leave?"

She hit him, again, a third, three more marks against his leg, before deciding that was enough. Laying the belt at the top of his foot, she reached into her pocket and brought out the handcuffs, showing them to him. "Do you have keys for this?"

Was that even something people could control? Shuuichi didn't know, he'd never seen someone cum before. Hell, he'd never even seen himself cum until Nao had spread him in front of his mirror. But, if she said it was ugly, then...

"Noooo, no no no, don't leave!" he moaned, squirting from both his holes, his tongue lolling out a bit as he desperately rubbed his nipples, just enamored with the idea that he looked ugly and horrifying while he orgasmed. "I-I don't know what I'm doing-I didn't - aaaa~ - d-do it on purpose!"

Shuuichi could feel himself grinding against her boot as much as he could in his position, needing the stimulation, making loud, embarrassing sounds every time she hit him. Nao had said that everyone in the library would've watched him if he started touching himself then...would they all be disgusted too?

Blinking hazily up, at Nao, Shuuichi swallowed ineffectively as an excited tremble went through him. "Y-yes...in the...the desk drawer..."

Nao nodded, giving him a sympathetic look as she said, "Are they? My, I do hope you'll be able to open that later then."

Taking the belt back, she let his leg drop, pulling her heel out from inside of him as she knelt down, grabbing his sides and (actually having some difficulty, as he was slicked with sweat now) turning him over. She took one of his arms and, pulling it back far more than was at all necessary, she put the handcuff on one arm, and then did the same for the other, binding his hands behind him. Then, enjoying the sound of him grunting and gasping every time she did it, she whipped at his backside, putting a few long red marks against his...surprisingly plump ass, before deciding to re-purpose the belt.

"Up, Shuu-dear, up, up," she coaxed, grabbing at his hair and pulling back on it, guiding him back onto his knees. Then, she put his belt around his neck, putting the leather end through the buckle end and tightening it around his neck. Once it was at a length where it wouldn't choke him idly but still was tight and secure, she pushed the pointed metal through the leather, creating a new belt hole there, keeping it in place. "Well...at least that's kind of cute," she admitted, admiring her handiwork, before taking the leftover line of the belt and tugging at it, pulling Shuuichi back to the mirror, his body following his neck, shuffling on his knees as she pressed him against the mirror, as she asked cheerfully, "What do you think? I think a collar suits you. Probably due to your history."

At this, Nao suddenly stopped, the words out of her mouth before she could analyze them, but once they were spoken, feeling...that maybe that was a level of making Shuuichi stressed and uncomfortable that...she wasn't comfortable with.

The boy may have essentially done all this to himself, and was enjoying the torture, but...that didn't mean she should make fun of the fact that, essentially, he had been a slave a relatively short time ago. Something that she absolutely wanted to know more about, in greater detail, preferably getting answers and perspectives from the Luminary trio themselves (how did a genuine friendship between, essentially, royalty and his two slaves actually work in any kind of healthy way?)...but not openly mock.

So, wanting to take back that bit of damage, she said softly, running her hand through his hair for a moment, "Nevermind that last part, Shuu. That's not relevant to anything. Now, just lean yourself against the mirror. Let's see what we can shove inside of you, hm?"

She left him there, going to get her bag, considering the inadequate dildo again, before sighing. She took it, before her eyes went back to the book shelf...

"I think I'll give you a choice. Isn't that nice of me? Say thank you, Miss Nao," she teased, grabbing the three items and presenting them to the mirror so that Shuuichi could see what she was holding behind him.

She had the dildo, which was long but thin, a starter dildo, as she hadn't known what to expect. The ornate magnifying glass, its handle large and made of decorative glass balls, and the thickest of out of the three, the rigged, octagonal cheap metal swimming trophy, the top and bottom bit she would screw off, just leaving the tower.

"I'm certain two of these items have such sentimental value, for you to bring them all the way from Luminary...but they are both quite a bit bigger than my dildo. So I'll leave it up to you. Use my dildo? Or pick one of your treasured memories to use as a sex toy. It's up to you!" she said with a smile.

Shuuichi felt his leg bonelessly drop once Nao let it go, enjoying even the small, dulled thump of his heel hitting the ground, and, though he didn't want to resist even a little, his body was pliant as she turned him around, cuffing his hands behind his back...which meant he couldn't touch himself anymore, his nipples already aching. And if she didn't unlock them later...then he wouldn't be able to relieve himself then either. It seemed like every time he woke up these days he needed to rub one out, even if that was how he'd gotten to sleep in the first place.

His crotch pulsing in excitement, even if his hands were out of the picture, Shuuichi rutted himself against the floor, now sticky with his sweat and...other liquids, especially as Miss Nao--

"Uu-uuun~!" Every time she touched his ass it was something new and exciting, the spanks--she was spanking him--echoing right down through his body, giving him that pain-spiked pleasure that...was honestly becoming everything Shuuichi craved.

He didn't want to leave the floor, didn't want to give up the only friction he could still get, but that's exactly why he easily rose when Miss Nao pulled him up by his hair, swallowing over and over as she tightened his belt around his neck and...

A little of the haze was cleared, a flicker of something...genuinely hurt going across his face, a tremble of fear that...wasn't connected with his arousal. His...

Shuuichi shivered as his nipples pressed against the cold surface of the mirror, the moment gone and replaced with the excitement of things being shoved in him.

"Thank you, thaaaank you, Miss Nao..." he huffed, panting, feeling himself leak down between his cheeks and down the backs of his thighs. His eyes widened as he fogged up the mirror, seeing the items the older woman presented to him, the dildo...seeming pretty small, not enough to satisfy the sudden need in his ass, but the other two...

He heard himself giggle grossly as his thighs shook, imagining Nao shoving either item in his butt...or both. His mentor had been one of the most composed people Shuuichi had ever met--at least that was something he could connect with the librarian--and if she ever saw the ornate display magnifying glass going up his asshole...him swallowing up every ball, sullying it with...with his grossness... She'd think he was disgusting too, wouldn't she?

God...with either item...would he stain them? Would he ever get the smell out? Would people look at them, and know exactly where they'd been, how he'd used them for his own pleasure...

Shuuichi groaned, a trail of drool dripping down the mirror as he pressed against it, arching his back and spreading his legs to display his needy, wet hole. "B-both? Everything?"

"Ha ha! Aren't you delusional!" Nao laughed, genuinely amused by his answer. "Well, if you really want me to try, I certainly can...oh! Shoot, I almost forgot," she lied, putting the three items down by Shuuichi's feet, grabbing the loose end of the of belt and pulling him back against her, looking at him through the mirror as she pulled out the bent sounding rod, stainless steel, long and thin and thickening where it curved.

"Now, I'm gonna need you to try not to be an actual pathetic mess through this, Shuu. I'm gonna be shoving this up your pee-pee!" she said with a smile, though that smile turned into a sinister leer as she jerked at the belt a bit, just for emphasis, as she said, "And it's gonna be up there for...awhile. Longer than today, I mean. And it's extremely dangerous to put into you, and take out of you. You have to know what you're doing. So only I can take it out for you, which I will do at my own discretion. Understand? I'll be frank with you. Pissing, cumming, holding an erection? All of that is going to hurt more, from now on. I'd feel bad, if I knew you weren't probably impatient to have it in you, now that you know what it does. Disgusting whore," she said, the word sounding like a slur.

"But you have to be as still as possible while I put it in, or your dick's going to get ripped apart. Understand? If anything goes wrong and your dick splits open down the middle, it's your own fault. I take no responsibility," she told him, going around his front and kneeling down, grabbing his morphed, throbbing dick, and holding the sounding rob against its tip, a serious, determined look on her face as she said, "Don't lose the feeling in your legs. Don't fall. Don't pass out from the pain."

And then she snickered, because as she had suspected, and could now confirm, even the hole of Shuuichi's dick was enlarged. There probably wasn't actually any fear of his dick ripping apart at the wrong move.

...but...so long as he believed it, right?

Carefully, she pushed the metal in, and then kept pushing.

He murmured a breathless stream of thanks, his plump hole twitching just from her saying that she'd try, but a surprised whine drawled out of him as she pulled him away from the mirror, looking over the...rod of metal in her hand. The thin rod. Was...she just teasing him? Wanting to hear him ask her to put his belongings in his ass, just to put in something that, honestly, didn't look like it'd be satisfactory at all.

Shuuichi frowned softly, but the expression was soon wiped away as his eyes widened, the round gloss of despair exposing his thrill. The rod wouldn't do anything for his ass...but for his dick? His red, thick member jumped, almost as if it was reaching towards the rod in glee. Was...this even something that happened?

God, he didn't care, he just wanted it in him.

"...h-how long are you...?" He could barely swallow around his drool enough to murmur the question, bending his shaking knees slightly to prepare. ...e-everything with his dick was going to hurt? He wouldn't even need to think of Kokichi's soft lips, of Kaito's grunts of pain from his arm... If even peeing would hurt...

Shuuichi watched with rapt attention as Nao pressed the rod to his glans, not doing as much as he probably should to stifle his shivers. He noted with some amusement that, even with his new growth, the rod was longer than his shaft--was she going to...push it all the way into his bladder? Or leave it sticking out...visible...

"MMphh!" Biting his lip, Shuuichi threw his head back as the rod started to slide into his dick, painfully stretching him in the way he had expected from his ass before. He strained against the handcuffs and curled his toes, trying not to move his hips--he needed his dick, needed to cum, fuck he, he!

Another orgasm shook Shuuichi, but...nothing came out of his dick, and he felt a painful throbbing of pressure about halfway down his length.

Liquid from his ass continued to wet his thighs.

There was a moment of resistance in the push, and Nao realized with some amusement that his body was already trying to cum through, as far as Nao knew it, what was one of the most painfully sexual things you could do to a person. She pushed through it, keeping the metal going, going, going...until the very tip was the only thing left out, long enough to get her fingers around it when the time came, and long enough that wearing underwear for him for the indeterminate future was going to be an 'adventure', to say the least.

She decided to ignore his question entirely, carefully letting go of his dick and waiting to see if...well, anything unusual happened. But no. The metal stayed securely where she put it, and there wasn't any sign of bleeding as far as she could tell, his dick still active and high. So...success. Perfect.

And then, for funsies, she flicked the head with her middle finger, enjoying the small, agonized scream that resulted.

"Alright. Back on the mirror, Shuu," she said, standing back up and wiping her hands on his chest, before reaching around and grabbing his belt, pushing him against the mirror again. She heard a small 'tap' sound and realized with some delight that the metal at the end of his dick had hit the glass a little, the idea amusing to her, as she reached down to pick up the dildo first.

Holding the belt with one hand and the dildo with the other, Nao hummed to herself cheerfully as she bent down, looked at Shuuichi's exposed, twitching asshole with endless curiosity, the strange natural lubrication literally soaking him. Not making any ceremony out of it, since she doubted this would feel much like anything to him, she put the dildo against him and shoved it in, the rubbery item sliding in effortlessly. "Tsk. Look at that. Do you even feel that in you, Shuu? Suppose that's the problem with being a whore: what would be good enough for anyone else doesn't even phase you."

And then, reaching back for a heavy swing, she SLAPPED the back of his ass, pushing in the dildo a little farther. Once again, she heard that small 'tink' sound of metal hitting glass, and snorted to herself as the boy writhed.

Leaving him to it for a bit, she knelt down and picked up the magnifying glass this time, looking it over. "This is very pretty, actually," Nao mused, twirling it in her hand, "Shame it's being wasted on something like you. Alright, Shuu, let's go for item number two!"

Holding onto the belt, getting the magnifying glass pressed against him, many of the balls that made up its handle twice the girth of the dildo, this time it took a little bit of twisting and digging to shove the handle in, his skin expanding and compressing around the varied sized glass balls with little slurping sounds. That isn't to say it was difficult to get the item inside of him. Just that it was more finicky than the dildo.

Once it was in, she thought about moving the magnifying glass in and out of him, seeing how that would feel on him in comparison to everything else she had done...but decided to experiment with something first.

Taking her knee against his backside, holding onto his belt with one hand and her other hand holding one of his bound arms, she started to kick her knee against him, at first softly, and then harder, into his ass, pushing the items against his inner walls with each violent push.

And every now and again, she still heard that little 'tink'.

Shuuichi moaned and panted as the rod stretched every little bit of his dick open, caught in a confusing sensation of release and yet? Tiny globs of white popped out around the rod every now and then, but he couldn't cum properly, his head twitching and squeezing against the rod.

It felt AMAZING.

As soon as it was in, the pain from his erection constant now, Shuuichi couldn't keep his hips still any longer, shaking and jolting, especially when Nao flicked the end of the rod and fuck. He could feel the vibration through the whole damn thing.

Shuuichi barely even registered being led back over to the mirror, too high on pleasure and pain, only shivering again as his tip hit the mirror, wanting to hit his dick against it again and again to feel the shock travel through the rod...

"...h-huh?" ...feel what in him? He blinked at Nao's reflection in the mirror dumbly before his gaze fell, landing on the magnifying glass and the trophy...without the dildo... The realization hit him the same time Nao did, and Shuuichi absolutely squealed as she spanked him, realizing that he had an entire dildo in him that...he couldn't even feel...

Out of everything...that...was...he actually a whore?

Shuuichi didn't get much time to ruminate on that as Nao started on getting the magnifying glass into him and...if he'd been able to think at all during this, Shuuichi would've wondered how he hadn't passed out with how red he was turning, just the sounds of his backside eagerly slurping up the elegantly beautiful display piece that would now forever be sullied by him...

"Aaaahn...mmm..." Pressing back into his insertions, little drops of white escaping his steadily plumping cock, well...it wasn't the stretch the rod had been, but it still felt very nice. But not as nice as...o-oh...Nao jamming the items into his hole, hard and without mercy, Shuuichi just moaning and dripping the whole time, the smile that stretched across his sweaty, red face at feeling his hole start to stretch against the base of the glass's lens...disgusting.

Nao watched him curiously as he spasmed and went red, moaning and whining at her attacks against him. As she continued to knee him in the back, she felt something shift and, in surprise, she looked down...

...was his ass trying to widen around the lens part!?

That...that wasn't possible. There was no way the skin could possibly stretch that far...but as she tapped it again, then pushed it, experimentally...it wasn't close to succeeding, but it was still stretching more than she would have thought...huh.

...how...how much could his ass actually stretch before something tore inside of him? There had to be a limit, right?

"Okay, time to get on your knees again, Shuu," Nao said, almost absentmindedly as she grabbed at his belt and firmly pushed him to the ground, moving him so that his head and chest were laid flat against it, and his ass, with all the items still inside, bared upwards. She then went behind him and, still curious, kicked both legs aside, forcing his stance so wide that she could see his body tremble just from the effort and pressure it took to keep himself in the position. She didn't care about any of that though, just...determined to find his limit.

The idea of shoving all three of these items into him at once had been a ludicrous fantasy by a truly thirsty whore...but...maybe?

"This might break something in you, Shuu," Nao informed the boy, kneeling behind him and grabbing the cheap award. She had been going to unscrew the small, fake diving person on the top of the award and take it off, but decided to leave it on, just unscrewing and tossing aside the base the whole award stood on. "I know you have the next shift to watch the prince. You won't be making it to that. Don't worry, I'll make sure someone covers for you. Hopefully, by the time your next shift comes around, you'll be able to walk again."

She did not feel confident about that assessment though, as she tipped the swimmer into the space where the other two items didn't quite connect, and, frowning, genuinely uncertain if this was going to work at all...started to push.

It was hard not just to fall to the ground...and so he sort of did, unable to brace with his arms. Shuuichi heard his jaw click softly as he hit the floor, was reminded of how sensitive his nipples were when they touched against the sticky mess below him...a mess that he made all on his own...

He whined as he felt his cock bounce, unused to the added weight inside it, but still so painfully hard that it remained raised up against his stomach, some of the spare liquid from his ass now dripping down his taint and over his engorged balls.

He...he wanted more inside him...he was a gross whore that needed his hole stretched to its limits... Whimpering at the prospect of something tearing in him, not being able to walk--that had happened to the Dicean Prince, Kaito had fucked him so hard he limped the next day--Shuuichi only felt his body vibrate in excitement.

"Please... Y-you're so nice to me...make it hurt, please..." Shuuichi choked on the rest of his words as his hole stretched--finally--and he felt something thicker start to gape him open. God...he was panting, spread out on the ground like an animal in heat, dripping from every orifice, his ass being filled with the few memories of home he had wanted to keep...

Absolutely disgusting.

"Aaaung...uumph...aaa~" Shuuichi moaned as his hole stretched and convulsed, liquid seeping out of every crack between the objects shoved inside. His cock, notably thicker than it had been, sputtered a bit at his tip, and Shuuichi found himself gyrating his hips, pressing into Nao filling his whore hole up, then tapping the rod against the ground, a rhythm that lasted a few minutes before--

"AA-AAAAA!!" It felt like something popped in him, and Shuuichi's back arched violently, his once plump, swollen hole popping over the lip just after the figurine, stretched tight around the items, a small flood of white bursting around the sounding rod, his glans looking significantly more swollen than it had even at the beginning of all this.

This. This was probably her best chance to wear him out.

"Ugh, is that it? Is that all you can take!?" Nao mocked, reaching around him and grabbing his cock, squeezing at his head with her nails and rubbing up and down the shaft as she kept her grip on the cheap trophy, pushing it in a little, then pulling it out again, it not having a lot of room to move, but Nao willing to force it through as she looked down at Shuu in disgust.

"Why are you wasting my time like this, if this is all you have to offer?! I just spent an hour forcing myself to touch you, to deal with the gross noises you make, your disgusting, repulsive expressions, and that's it? That's all I get as my reward!? A few spurts around the rod and that small little shout? Not even a thank you for my effort after you came for, what, the fourth time now!? No apologies for making me watch you make that disgusting, whorish expression again!? God, I thought maybe I'd be willing to take pity on you again in the future, but if THIS is all I'm gonna GET FOR IT!!? DO YOU EVEN HAVE ANYTHING TO SAY FOR YOURSELF, YOU SLUT!?"

As she shouted and screamed abuse at him, trying to frighten and stress him out more now than she had the rest of the session, still manipulating his dick and pushing and pulling the trophy in and out of him, which somehow, somehow?? managed to find more room the more she did so, she let go of the trophy, pulling her hand back and SLAMMING her palm against his ass, once, again, then again, working his dick, the items inside him shifting and vibrating against each blow which reddened his backside, shouting, "WHAT A WASTE OF TIME YOU ARE! TOTALLY WORTHLESS!!!"

Shuuichi could barely even respond to the insults, could barely even get his high-pitched moans out from the overwhelming pleasure bursting in him, every nerve in his dirty, slut body firing off and making him lose his mind. If there was any part of him that hadn't been touched by the pollen, it was absolutely driving his terror wild as this woman abused his body.

And Shuuichi started to sob, even with a manic smile on his face, truly nothing more than a shameful whore turning his fourth orgasm into a fifth...then a sixth, his cock trying to cum as much as it possibly could stretched tight around the rod. His ass swallowed as much as it possibly could, the pain making him shake, the barrage of spanks making him quake, and, sobbing, Shuuichi's legs gave out, squishing his cock and all the items in him around in one final stab of pain that made his eyes roll back.

...after his body was only moving in residual shock, his cock gave another spurt, the rod jammed in just a little farther.

Even Nao was breathing heavy by the time he was done, her bicep and palm sore from the effort of stimulating him past his limit. She looked down at him, crumbled at her feet, awake, but only technically; once the shock of what had just happened to him eased up he would no doubt pass out from exhaustion.

That last part had...felt a bit harsh. But Nao had recognized that she was running out of ways to up his excitement slowly, not without putting him in more danger than this experiment would be worth. Beside, his terrified tears, competing with his joyful smile, had been truly something to witness. Fascinating.

...she thought briefly of just leaving him where he was, but, again, that was probably more cruel than she needed to be for her observations. It's not like he would notice either way by this point, but waking up to still having your ass stuffed with cherished possessions was needlessly going overboard.

So, carefully, one by one she pulled the items out, throwing her dildo back into her bag, and taking the lens and the trophy into the bathroom, throwing them into his sink for him to wash later. Then she went back and picked him up, tossing him onto his bed, putting the covers over him...but leaving the handcuffs on, as she had threatened. She did this because it might be useful, making certain he couldn't escape this room before she could come check in on him tomorrow, make certain that none of what had just happened would come back to haunt her.

As she had just settled into the idea of exploring the room, buttoning up her shirt idly, she suddenly remembered: right. The cock ring.

Between it and the rod, it would most certainly keep him from cumming without her assistance, which had the benefit of making him more dependent on her, which would make studying him simpler. Plus, she could use the size of the cock rings she needed to use from session to session as a way of keeping measurement of his growth, should he end up growing any more.

See? Perfectly logical reasons to use sexual torture on what was very likely a highly drugged and mentally vulnerable individual. Nao genuinely didn't second guess the morality of her decisions here at all, going into her bag and picking out a cock ring with the same ease she picked the pen she would write with that day. Bringing it back to Shuuichi, moving the cover aside, she checked the size to make sure it would fit right, and then...pushed his head through it.

Even in his half-catatonic state, Shuuichi's body shivered and spasmed at the attention, a desperate sound in the back of his throat before, him looking up vaguely in her direction, stressed and confused and still something needing in his face...his eyes fluttered shut, that last bout of pain and pleasure the final straw on his poor, overly stimulated body.

Nao then went to wash her hands, check herself over in the mirror...and then got to work.

Lord...that was a rough one. She could clearly see Yasu's exasperation and disappointment when she told her wife tonight--but it hadn't been illegal! And that's what mattered here. Shuuichi had good friends, and if the change in him could at any point be reverted, then, well, it'd be up to them to fix the young man. And that process would be just as fascinating to watch.

Nao moved with the efficiency of someone who was used to getting a lot done in a short time span, starting to tear Shuuichi's room apart. Well. For searching. She'd leave everything more or less how it was.

There wasn't a lot to look through, at the end of the day. Clothes, books, toiletries, the detective supplies were kind of interesting, but just because it was a fairly niche profession to her. She did take notes on them regardless, learning what a detective would actually bring with them for cases.

What was actually interesting was a bag she found hidden in Shuuichi's closet, stacked within the boxes he used to move. From her own research, he knew what she was looking at--poisons. Small samples of a few things, some she could tell were potent on their own, others kept in separate substances to be combined, poisons and antidotes alike. A whole lot of notes on the matter that she would likely ask about in the future, and...

Nao raised an eyebrow, holding up the jar, something different from how the other substances were kept. Something...meant for more regular access. She shook it softly, watching little motes stick to the sides of the jar, and then her orange eyes narrowed as she remembered a very specific thing Shuuichi had once asked her about.

...but why would he try Despair Pollen? He obviously wasn't using it as all the reports had--as a poison, causing mass chaos and murder and mayhem before death. Why microdose on something that you knew was so dangerous in larger doses?

...because you were curious.

Nao sighed and looked back at the wrecked boy on the bed with more pity than she had shown throughout the entire experiment. At least he had used himself as a subject...though that led to him being changed this much without anyone knowing. If there was a chance of him healing from this...then the answer laid in the pollen. Luckily, there was a large source of pharmaceutical knowledge right in their city.

Placing the jar in her bag, Nao searched around in Shuuichi's clothes for a moment before finding his room key, taking one last moment to move some of the sticky strands of his hair out of his face, looking over the...frankly concerning silhouette of his form under the covers. ...it mattered more that the chemical changes could be reverted, but...well, she just hoped the physical changes wouldn't bother him too much.

Walking back out into the empty hall, Nao locked the detective's room and pocketed the key, heading out and...right. She needed to find a replacement for his shift watching Kokichi. Getting a bad stomach bug could really knock you on your ass.

-

When Kaito and Maki had heard that Shuuichi had a stomach bug and, after getting the librarian’s help getting back up to his room, asked her to find him a replacement before locking himself in his room, of course his friends had been worried for him. Kaito had knocked at his door, asking his sidekick if he needed any help in there, but after a lot of silence, the two had decided he had probably already fallen asleep for the day, trying to rest away his illness.

Understandable. These things happened.

Kaito had been going to volunteer to just take Shuuichi's shift, but it was Maki, partly out of concern for him and partly for her own reasons, who had insisted that Kaito needed to take a break from being in the room, arguing with him that Kokichi could be left alone with a healer for a few hours while Kaito stretched his legs. The two had argued hotly about it, but eventually Kaito had submitted, saying he was going to use the time to go into town to get Kokichi some gifts then.

Maki had rolled her eyes and told him, “Fine, whatever gets you out of this room for awhile”, and then had immediately gone to collect her blueprints, waiting for the sound of Kaito leaving.

She checked back then every hour, to see if Kokichi was awake, and she was starting to get nervous, because she was on hour three, and Kaito would no doubt be heading back from town soon, unwilling to take the full time allowed away from Kokichi. Sighing, she gave a quick knock at Kokichi's door, for the healer's benefit, before walking in, saying, "It's me again. Any sign of him rousing yet?"

Luckily for Maki, Kokichi had woken up not too long before her latest check-in, taking his next dose and being informed that Shuuichi had fallen ill and Kaito had been kicked out to actually get him some time out of the room. While he was cold alone in their bed...Kokichi agreed.

So, when Maki walked in, Kokichi laughed weakly and gave her something of a wave. "Mm, don't think so. He might be asleep for a while, check in next year."

The healer had looked between them and softly announced that they were going to stretch their legs in the hall for a little bit, and as they left, Kokichi gave his friend a curious smile. "...I know Shuu-chan got sick...if that's what you wanted to tell me. What's up?"

Maki gave Kokichi a quick once-over, wondering if he was actually strong enough to have this conversation right now. He seemed more or less awake, and some of the color was coming back into his face compared to yesterday...hmmm...

But, more importantly, Kaito was away. And since that was probably going to be pretty rare, Maki had to take her shot.

So Maki closed the door behind the healer, going to sit at the edge of Kokichi's bed, with several rolled up posters in her arm, and she asked him, "Prince Kokichi. I was hoping that you might have some time now to listen to a debrief of my duties?"

Kokichi blinked in surprise before his expression softened with sadness. And then even that was pushed away into something neutral. "Of course, Maki-chan. Right now...well, I have a lot of time for pretty much everything."

With a little embarrassment, he gestured out his hands a little. "Help me sit up? I wanna...be able to see what you've put work into..." He did, really. He didn't think Maki was gonna go full slasher story on him, so he'd give her his full attention--as much as he was able to give, at least.

He didn't want to have a use for an assassin. People weren't supposed to die at their government's hand. But...things were different in the world from how he thought. Some governments didn't care if their people died. Some people were just...monsters. He still didn't want to kill any of them, but...he couldn't let himself be ignorant. And...maybe he'd be able to find overlap in Maki's duties that would allow her to do...er, less lethal things that would be in her wheelhouse still.

"...while...I don't think I'd really like graphic details...don't hold back. I don't like being left in the dark, especially with important stuff like this. Even if you think it'd upset me."

"Of course. I'm not Kaito, or the king. I'm your assassin, and you are my prince. I should be able to expect you to be able to handle my reports," Maki said, her tone stern, but her hands gentle as she, now practiced at it, helped him sit up, repositioning his pillows and making sure he was steady, taking a step back and looking him over one more time, just...making certain he actually would be fine.

Then she gripped her hands into fists, and briefly, she bowed to Kokichi, entirely in professionalism mode as her face went cold and blank.

"I am aware that my new position here under your Dicean chain of command is...more vague, than my position had been in Luminary, and I respect that several aspects of my responsibilities are likely to be dismissed under your leadership. I believe I also understand that in your eyes, I might not even have a job as an assassin anymore. I can accept that, but as I have not been given any official orders or correspondence on the subject yet, I am obligated to maintain both the responsibilities and privileges of my position as I understand them. One of those responsibilities and privileges that I've enjoyed in the past is the trust of my leadership to present to them potentially politically useful hits as they occur to me for presentation and review. I have spent some time since I have arrived here putting together plans for hits that may potentially benefit both the Dicean royal family, and the Dicea Kingdom."

Opening up all the posters, bending them slightly so that they stayed, each one covered in detailed maps of living spaces, guard rotation shifts, internal informants that can be relied on for information and aid, as well as psychological reviews and general schedules of the targets.

Pointing to each poster with the corresponding political hit, Maki listed off, "King Leon Momota, Princess-Consort Sayaka Momota, Heir Apparent Byakuya Momota, as well as three noble families that you may or may not be familiar with--the Kaido family, the Shard family, and the Linn family. I would also strongly recommend everyone on the Togami Corporation Counsel, and the top five priestesses of the Atua religion, just to be thorough. Who would you like to hear about first? The Princess-Consort strategy is the most simple to go over, especially considering she's going on her yearly vacation to Novoselic soon..."

On the contrary, Kokichi was broken out of professionalism as Maki helped him sit up. Aiichi he understood, but...Kaito? ...sure...he'd hidden Byakuya's letter from him, but...Kokichi had a feeling that was more to protect his own feelings than Kokichi's. And he had told him eventually. So...why was Maki saying that Kaito would...not expect Kokichi to be able to handle things? That was literally how they'd come to get closer with each other.

But, instead of commenting, Kokichi just pressed his lips together and listened. Even if he immediately wanted to refute what he was now realizing this entire presentation was about. Deaths wouldn't benefit Dicea. No way.

But...at the list Maki gave him, Kokichi felt his heart drop. And, for several moments, he didn't say anything. As Kaito's husband, he should object. And, for their deaths, just as a person Kokichi wanted to object. But as a leader...

"...before I collapsed the other day...Shuu-chan and I were talking about Luminary," he started, his voice deathly soft, eyes reflecting the hurt he'd felt that day, though his pulse remained steady. "Whenever I ask Kai-chan about it...there's just so much I don't understand. He said that he was just ex...explaining things badly, so... I thought, okay. I've grown up in an enemy nation, of course I have biases. There must be good things about Luminary that...that I'm just not getting. If there wasn't...then people would've taken the nation back..."

He had to pause for a moment to catch his breath, looking at Maki with a miserable expression. "...Shuu-chan cleared that up...though he said some other stuff I don't understand..." ...he'd ask about that later.

"...the Luminous people are suffering under unjust cruelty. While...removing all these people from power might benefit Dicea--as, with the redistribution of wealth, trade would benefit both our nations--it would...undoubtedly mean the world to the people of Luminary."

...but that was where he felt stuck, his conflict clear on his face. Before, when he had faced all of that, he'd felt so despairingly helpless, but...Maki was giving him a way to do something, even if that was just giving the okay for someone else to do something.

...but killing them?

Sighing softly, he tried to think out loud, cluing Maki into where his mind was. "...I do not believe death is an answer for anything. Ideally...I would love to see these people removed from power peacefully. However...there's too many of them to just...somehow take down the whole system without anyone becoming a casualty. Not to mention what would happen afterward...even if something like that was achieved..."

"...there's no way for revolutionaries to organize as things are... Anarchy works to a point, but, with a country as large as Luminary...with the abuse that's been inflicted on its people...without any leadership ready to organize people right after the existing structure is taken down...then people with middling power now, who aren't on this list...will likely just take the places of these people... And there is no way anyone could convince me that taking out a large portion of Luminary would ever be a good idea." There was a line between revolution and genocide he was not going to let anyone cross if he had anything to do with it.

Still feeling just...stuck, Kokichi gave Maki a soft, admiring look. None of that had included the very relevant human element. "...Maki-chan is very brave to consider any of this when she knows how much it would hurt Kai-chan."

"...I love Kaito," Maki said, staring at the posters, at her hard work, at not just the thought she had put into this since she had gotten here, but things she had been thinking about...daydreaming about...for years. "But he's not the only person that I love… My..." Maki glanced over at Kokichi, her eyes narrow and suspicious, searching his face for...something. Something she was used to seeing in the people who had the ability to control her. To offer them even more weaknesses being inexcusable...

...but Maki wanted to trust Kokichi. Honestly, needed to trust Kokichi right now. He was the only one who could let her do this.

"My siblings are all still back there. The other kids in my orphanage. Not the ones I grew up with, of course...they had all...well, one way or another, they're not there anymore. But I kept visiting my old home, to check in on the ones I had left behind, but the new ones, the new children, always got so attached to me...so then I'd have to go back and check on them as well, and then new ones after that...following the same pattern over and over...I have had so many siblings...and right now they are being beaten. And abused. And brainwashed and lethally challenged and sold to either dangerous positions or rich families who will keep them forever. This one," she said, a growl in her voice as she pointed to Byakuya's poster, her eyes narrow in fury, "-wants to create trade negotiations to start selling indentured citizen contracts between borders...and I know for a fact he already has the Kimigashine Kingdom on board."

"...they're evil, Kokichi. The Momota family, and the nobles, religion, and businesses that hide under their umbrella, make worse everything they touch. And I...I finally have someone in my chain of command who...could not only send me to deal with them, but also override any command Kaito gives me to stop. If you say I can go and do this, he can't stop me, because you outrank him."

"...it's my only chance..." Maki said, eyes far away, a terrible sort of hope brimming through them... "I know Kaito would be hurt. That it might ruin our relationship. But some things are more important...and...maybe if they were all dead...Kaito..."

Maki looked over at Kokichi, eyes hard. Determined. "The Momota family dead, the Luminary Kingdom restored, Dicea bolstered, and Kaito might actually be able to reason out for himself why all that needed to happen. Isn't that the best possible outcome? Isn't that worth pursuing?"

...Kokichi's heart was breaking. He knew it wasn't fair, he wasn't the one being hurt by all this...but it was only because he had the fortune to be born in Dicea. His eyes widened slightly as Maki explained exactly what sort of business Byakuya was involved in, and, with all the horror in Luminary, knowing that there was another kingdom that would encourage it too?

The pulse monitor started to blip irregularly, but Kokichi just closed his eyes and took deep breaths, trying to be strong for this.

He didn't want to believe that true evil was something that actually existed, but...he...couldn't see anything positive about the Momotas...except for his husband, who, at this point, Kokichi was amazed that Kaito turned out the way he had among that...horror.

This wasn't about Kaito. This wasn't about Dicea.

This was about the millions of people in Luminary that were being slaughtered by the system and people meant to protect them.

Kokichi still wasn't...exactly stable, but he'd gotten enough breath back to talk, so he opened his eyes. "Don't tell me who they are. But...if these people were to d-disappear, would there be people who could st...step up to take care of and ensure the safety of the L-Luminous people? Before anything else...I need to know that."

Maki's eyes lit up, staring at Kokichi in surprise...before nodding.

"Kaede Momota is a strong contender for political reform that would matter, and since she's next in line for the crown after Byakuya, she would take over as the new Queen's Law. But, as well meaning as Kaede is, if we don't destabilize the Togami Corporation or take out at the very least the Linn and Shard family, she'll likely find herself under too much political pressure to make the reforms that would matter most," Maki said, thinking entirely of the indentured citizen program. "The Linn, Shard, and Kaido families are the three current strongest noble families, and have made their success based on the current political structure. I can't guarantee that the noble families who replace the power vacuum left behind would be made up of saints, but it would, again, destabilize things enough that Kaede could potentially restructure the noble families as she saw fit. The Togami Corporation is...trickier. They're the ones who manage the indentured servant contracts, and would all be replaced by employees who would continue to do the same thing, but ideally the business would be made illegal if we could just give Kaede time to put in the reform. Finally, the Atuan priestesses, if we go five layers down, would all be replaced by much younger and more inexperienced members of the clergy, who would be too busy learning how to run the religion to make use of the power restructure for themselves..."

Maki frowned, saying, almost shyly, "I...understand that this is all based on a lot of faith in Kaede Momota. And...while this might weaken my argument, I...I didn't come up with this list myself. This is something me and her...discussed before I came here. We both knew that it was an unlikely possibility that I could ever actually act on this list...but she assured me it would work...she promised she'd stop the program if I could just get her to power..."

And this is where the real crack in Maki's reasoning showed, her willingness to be too honest to Kokichi in this moment turning against her. This wasn't her plan. This was the plan of another Momota...who understood how badly Maki wanted to be able to do something for her siblings...and was clinging onto any hope provided to her.

She had no idea if this was going to work or not. She was just following orders.

Kaede...Kaito's cousin. He'd heard nothing about good things about her, except for...being manipulative. Often benignly, but... And...the most of what he knew of her came from Kaito, which, to be fair, came more easily to him than what he said about the rest of his family, but...he'd still said that things weren't as bad as they were in Luminary. Aside from every other unknown, Kokichi knew his husband bore his biases plainly.

And the Togami Corporation...the Luminaries had mentioned someone named Togami before. But...he certainly didn't know enough about that for it to be any sort of factor.

Kokichi bit his lip and shakily pressed his hands together, belaying his anxiety. This was...a lot of faith in Kaede. "This...the list at least seems correct, though I...I don't know Luminary power st-structures enough for that to mean much... But... Kaede d-didn't tell you her plans for fixing other p-parts of Luminary...did she...?"

Small pains started to flare in his hands, but he continued to press them together, his brow furrowed and sweat starting to glisten on his face. Kaede was one person, and she currently benefitted from the power structure in place. Certainly, she wasn't only relying on Maki, surely she had other people working with her...but...he didn't know for sure. Or if any of those people weren't also people who were currently in positions of power.

His breath starting to hitch, Kokichi tried to power through this last bit. "...i-if I sent letters to Kaede...how much w-would they be intercepted?"

He remembered what had started his conversation with Shuuichi--what would you be willing to sacrifice to help other people? At the time, Kokichi wasn't sure if he had an answer for that, but...killing a few people to save millions? ...if...if he said yes...he needed to know without a doubt that it would save millions.

If Kaede could assure him that power would be given back to the Luminous people, that not just the indentured citizen program would be dismantled, but every other program meant to control people would be too, that the new leaders would truly care for their people and would do everything they could to ease their suffering...then...

The small pains suddenly stabbed into sharp pains, and Kokichi gasped a sudden breath as his head lolled forward, his eyes fluttering for a moment. Time was up.

Maki frowned, immediately putting her hand out and placing her fingers against his pulse. "Kokichi, If you can answer me, tell me your status. If you can't, we're going to the med bay."

Panting, he pried his eyes back open and focused his exhausted gaze on Maki. "M'okay... a-ah..."

He let his hands fall away from each other, his joints obviously irritated as they shook in pain, and Kokichi tried to rest his head back against the pillows more, closing his eyes again and just...tried to breathe.

Okay...okay...in and out...you're sick, it's okay...everything's not going to fall apart if you need to take a minute.

"S-sorry..."

Maki gave him a hard look, once again assessing him...before shaking her head. "Don't be. I'm sorry too. I didn't mean to push."

"You don't have to answer me now. If you want more information, I can get it for you. And, honestly, I was...probably being selfish trying to put this on you on your sickbed. Again, I apologize, Kokichi. This...I sometimes feel impatient...but this can wait for you to be well enough to think about it. There's no hurry."

Maki sighed, feeling his pulse until it started to settle down a little, before saying, "Let me feed you some tea and then I'll help you lie back down."

Maki readjusted Kokichi onto the bed, once again repositioning pillows and being certain to make sure he was comfortable and stable, to the best of her murderous ability. When she decided she had done what she could, she bowed to him. "Thank you. If you want, I can dismiss the healer and spend some time with you. If you think you could stay awake for it, maybe I could...I don't know. You read books. I could read to yo-"

There was a knock at the door, Kaito saying on the other side, "Hey, it's me! My hands are full, could you let me in?"

Maki quickly gathered up her materials, her face impassive as she worked, before glancing at Kokichi. "...I...would appreciate if you didn't tell Kaito," was all she said, before going to let him in.

Kaito had a bag on his arm and two cups, one full of chocolate mousse, the other with strawberry pudding, Kaito giving Maki a warm grin as he said, "Oh, hey! Thought it would be the healer. Don't be mad at me, I was gone for hours. I held up my end. Is he-hey! He is!" Kaito said, eyes brightening as he saw his husband, though the grin on his face faltered a little as he saw the sweat on him. "Everything alright?" he asked Maki.

"Sorry. Was talking about difficult things," Maki admitted, glancing over at Kokichi. "Should I send the healer back in?"

"Nah I've got him. Check it out, 'Kichi! I took a trip to that pastry place you like so much! Got some soft foods and stuff. Totally fine if you're not up for it now, but it'll be here waiting for ya when you are, babe," Kaito said, placing the food items down on the vanity desk before going to his husband's side, kissing him on the forehead before saying, "Where's your hand towel? Let me go grab one from the bathroom, get this sweat off you."

As Kaito got well into the rhythm of 'husband' mode, Maki gave both princes one last look, before heading off to get some rest herself before her own shift. Feeling...frustrated but hopeful at the same time.

She had almost gotten through to him...she was certain of it.

She wasn't pushy. This was a difficult subject for anyone, and...he just sucked with difficult subjects. For something so close to Maki's heart...fuck, she was so strong. Being powerless in a system that continually hurt everyone you loved, then being given even the slightest chance? He could understand why she'd waited, and he didn't want her to have to wait more, but... "S'okay...Jus'...need a m-more solid plan...before...anything..."

He needed to speak with Kaede--for once he cursed how long the postal system was--he needed to think about this, he--

Kokichi blinked sleepily over at the door.

...he needed to speak with Kaito. Not now. But...eventually, and before he said okay to anything.

Kokichi smiled weakly at his husband, definitely eyeing the desserts, though...he needed a bit more of a breather. But before Maki left, he gave her a smile as well. "Thanks...for talking with m-me...Maki-chan. 's something t' get back to...later...see ya."

Kaito was in a pretty good mood. While he hadn't wanted to admit it, getting away from the room had probably been something he needed, and while he had fussed and worried on the way down to town, once he was there he had allowed himself to relax a bit. He was only going to be out a few hours and the healer and Maki would be around...Kokichi would be okay for a few hours...

So Kaito, heading to the pastry shop, had taken his time and window shopped a bit, though made sure to keep himself to himself, and he was pretty certain no one in town had recognized him.

...well, except for one instance, where Kaito had been pretty certain three men had been arguing with each other over him, one of them...Kaito hadn't gotten the whole gist of it, but he had gotten the impression one of them wanted to confront him, and his two friends were talking him out of it. He hadn't stuck around to see how the argument would finish, quickly moving on to the next street over and going into a random shop to try to lose them.

But other than that, no issues!

...okay, one issue.

"Hey, babe, so..." Kaito laughed awkwardly as he came back with a clean, dry handtowel, sitting down next to Kokichi and starting to clean the sweat off of him, his touches light and gentle. "I went all the way out to town, and to that pastry shop, determined to get you some sweets, right?...Totally forgot I had no money. So, the gifts turned out to be less gifts and more...something that pastry lady is going to ask you to pay for the next time you come in. My bad. Oh! She did give you another free sample of that candy you liked so much though. It's in the bag somewhere. But, yeah. That was my goof. What were you and Maki talking about? I hope she wasn't trying to tell you stories about her job..."

While Kokichi smiled appreciatively at having his face cleaned, he did sigh a bit at Kaito's financial snafu. They really needed to have that budgeting lesson...even if this was just more of a case of Kaito not being paid yet.

"That's...really nice of Miss Andou to take an IOU... And to give another sample...those really were yummy..." He could already feel his mouth watering a little at the memory, but...maybe in a little bit. A-and...if Kaito would be willing to feed him again. His hands were in far too much pain to even try to eat himself...

...really a bad habit to fall into when he was still so ill. Kokichi's smile fell a bit though he...well, tried to shake his head, really more just managing to press into the pillows a bit more.

"It was my fault. Shuu-chan was tellin' me...some...stuff about Luminary, before, and...I wanted to get Maki-chan's perspective too... I shouldn't have asked...since I knew it'd upset me so much..." That still wasn't the kindest thing to tell Kaito, but...for the state of his country, it was more objective. If Kaito couldn't face that then...

...and there was no way he was telling him that his best friend and cousin were considering killing his whole family.

"Ah, yeah...Maki has...a lot of political opinions and stuff," Kaito murmured, giving his husband a shrug. "She and Shuuichi talk about that stuff a lot, and when Maki gets drunk, hooo boy...let's just say she couldn't drink in public at home. She talks like a rebel," Kaito said with a small grin, shaking his head. "But I like that about her. Back in high school, we talked about her trying to become a secretary when her contract was up. I think she'd be suited for it. But...they'd probably have never let her do it. It's hard for anyone to become a secretary, let alone a former indentured," Kaito admitted.

Realizing he was basically rambling to himself, Kaito grinned at Kokichi. "Thanks for indulging her. She loves talking about that stuff. Anyway, do you want anything? Bath, toilet, tea? Anything at all, just ask."

...he just...didn't say anything about it at all. That was very Kaito to be fair, but...fuck. It would be...difficult to bring this up in the future. Though...the one thing he did say was just another thing that made Kokichi’s heart ache. If people who were put through that program had difficulties finding any sort of job that wasn't what they were forced into...then...that would just force them back into it. There was no safety net in Luminary.

Kokichi managed to smile weakly back at his husband, planning to ask Kaede about that too. "I woke up...uh..." He blanked out for a moment, time difficult to parse. "Well, not that long ago, and I took my dose. I'd actually love to try one of the treats you brought for me, if, uh..."

His blush was extremely faint, but there. "If...you don't mind giving me a hand? Mine are...really hurting so...I don't think I can try to hold on to anything right now..."

Kaito lit up at this, grinning at Kokichi as he said, "Sure! And, if you want, I can put some of the massage oil on your wrists too, if that would help at all. We still have a little left. Just let me know."

The Luminary Prince (intensely relieved at the subject change) cheerfully went to grab the bag and the two cups of pudding and mousse, taking it to the nightstand and opening it up, looking it over curiously as he explained, "Okay, so, I basically explained your situation to pastry lady, and asked for anything that would be easy to swallow when you're feeling weak, ya know? And this is the stuff she recommended. I got some chocolate mousse, some strawberry pudding, and innnnn the bag are...some cotton candy stuff? I think? That will melt on your tongue. Umm...sugar packets...she offered hard candies, but considering you sometimes just fall asleep, I wasn't sure if hard candies were a good idea then. Though, if you disagree, I'll get those next time! Um...oh, these little sugar glass things that are also supposed to melt, I think? Here, can you see inside the bag?" Kaito asked, opening it up for his husband. "Anything look good?"

"Maybe..." Considering he'd provoked his pain by pressing his hands together, having the muscles relax would probably take some of the ache away. It wasn't too bad, and he could probably just sleep it away, but...Kokichi knew how much Kaito wanted to do things to help when Kokichi's body started to fall apart. It wasn't a big deal to have some of his pain eased sooner rather than later.

Kokichi peeked inside the bag though he had already sort of made up his mind, taking in the assortment with gluttonous glee. "...think you made a good call on the hard candies. I really don't need any more choking hazards in my life right now." It was dark, but still something of a joke that he weakly grinned up at Kaito at.

"The pudding sounds really good right now--Kai-chan should t-try some himself too. They're fluffy an' silky and just? Delicious." And, with strawberry, more of a blast of fruitiness than his tea, which, while he wasn't sick of it yet, was getting a little stale. Changing up the flavors he'd normally be stuck with while sick would...well, it'd make him happier, at the very least. Normally he was just stuck with tea, and occasionally broth if he could keep anything down and be awake enough to drink it.

Kaito's expression didn't change in any notable way, except in the sense that his affectionate look became...slightly more strained, and he suddenly found himself not quite looking Kokichi in the eye. Ha, yeah...

Yeah.

He still didn't really know...what to do about all that. In a very weird way, Kokichi's heart attack had made everything that had happened the night before...easier. It being this new thing that both he and Kaito could focus on, try to get past. But...just because they were distracted from what Kaito had done, didn't mean that this thing between them wasn't still...there.

But, thinking about it now would just make taking care of Kokichi harder. So, Kaito did what he did best--pretended like he hadn't thought about it at all.

Kaito smiled gently at his husband, nodding his head. He didn't have the same appreciation for sweets his husband did. Honestly, when he found himself craving certain kinds of food, it was usually certain kinds of meat prepared in certain ways (God, there had been a certain way the kitchen staff at home had made ribs...it was like you could taste the fire against it).

But he was more than happy to try it if it was something that would make Kokichi happy, so Kaito gave him a wink and said, "Sounds amazing, 'Kichi. Looking forward to it. Alright, one strawberry pudding coming up! ...hmmmm..."

Kaito frowned, looking through the bag. Ah...shit.

"Shoot, I... I wasn't even thinking about a spoon..." Kaito muttered, immediately annoyed with himself. The pastry lady had even told Kaito that he'd need to pick up a spoon at the utensil stand at the front of the store, but Kaito had walked right by it, like a total idiot...shoot. "I can go down and get a spoon, but do you just want a taste of it for now, and then I'll help you out with your wrist?" Kaito asked, opening up the container.

Taking his finger, not thinking much of it at all, he dipped his forefinger in and took out a small glob, taking it into his mouth and tasting the pudding, making certain to get some of the layer of the strawberry as well, with a thoughtful expression. "Hmm...you're right, 'Kichi. That's not bad," Kaito said, dipping his finger in again, taking up another glob, before offering his finger to Kokichi.

For all the things Kokichi hoarded in his room, spoons had never been one of them. What a tragic failing. He sighed softly, but...yeah, he could try a little now. Honestly he wasn't even sure if he'd be able to eat the whole cup, but it'd be nice to get a taste. Kaito could just hold it up to his mouth and--

oh

Kokichi's eyes widened a little, and his smile ticked up slightly into something incredulous. There was no way he would be up to sex right now, if he could even muster feelings of arousal, but...Kaito knew that. He was a big boy, he could handle any horny feelings that may arise from this without asking Kokichi to join in.

Opening his mouth, Kokichi took Kaito's finger into his mouth and quickly licked the pudding off, only letting himself savor it once his mouth was husband-free. "Mmm... Just as good as I remember. I'd say it's a little better tha...than not bad," he teased.

Kaito did blush slightly at the feeling of Kokichi's tongue against his finger, but he hadn't made the offer with anything sexual in mind, and almost immediately he dipped his finger in again, tasting it again for himself. "Look, just don't tell the pastry lady that was the review I gave it. I think she gets a little defensive over stuff like that. She offered me one of those candies she gave you, and practically burned a hole in my head when I said no thanks. Alright, one more scoop, then I'm gonna go grab that oil stuff," Kaito said, offering Kokichi another finger full of pudding.

Once that was done, Kaito wiped his finger against his own pants, closing the pudding up and putting it aside, getting up to go get the oil. Putting some of it on his hands and leaving the jar in the bathroom, Kaito headed out of the bathroom and back onto the bed. "Alright, this won't take more than a second, 'Kichi. And it's totally okay if you fall asleep, alright? Next time you wake up, either me or Maki will definitely be here, maybe even both. We got you."

Kaito immediately got to work, relieved to feel useful as he lathered the oil first on one wrist, then the other, letting the oil sit on both of them as he went back to the first wrist, gently running his thumbs over the thin muscles.

As he worked, like before, he rambled idly, mostly keeping his own mind busy as he said, "I'm almost finished with that book you got me. I'm looking forward to telling you about it, even though it's starting to look like the ending is gonna be a downer..."

"People care a lot about...their crafts. When you've worked so hard on something, i-it's hard not to take...it personally when someone doesn't want it..." Considering that the majority of people only took up jobs they were passionate about...well, getting defensive was an apt observation. Sure there were professions that were necessary but not exactly...something people would tend to put their whole heart and soul into. Like...municipal sanitation workers. Even people who loved to clean wouldn't be jumping at the chance to take care of garbage for a living. But that's why it was such a highly respected job. And paid very well.

The people who took on work that they weren't passionate about just to keep society running...it was incredibly honorable, and the government was sure not to only show that in pretty words.

Enjoying the last of the pudding for now, Kokichi let himself fully relax against the pillows, knowing that he might just fall asleep anyway, but...it was nice to know that Kaito wasn't expecting a conversational buddy right now.

"...I really appreciate you guys doing this..." he hummed as Kaito started rubbing a wrist, massaging away the pain Kokichi had brought up himself. "There are plenty of other people that can watch me, but...like, I'm not gonna say no to more time hanging out with my husband and friends... That said...mmm, though... Even if he's feeling better tomorrow...Shuu-chan doesn't have to strain himself on my behalf... should just focus on getting better..."

Stomach bugs really sucked. Kokichi was never a fan of vomiting, but being forced to do it so violently that it felt like someone had used your chest and stomach as a punching bag? Ugh. Shuuichi should probably focus on easy to eat foods too.

"Oh?" Kokichi opened an eye lazily--oops, he really was bad at noticing when he started to close them. "Not so...predictable then? ...'m lookin' forward to...hearing 'bout it..."

"Yeah. I think everyone is meant to be a bad guy? Not just in a, like, 'designated villain' kind of way, but in a way where the reader’s supposed to look at the cast and be like...these aren't good people. Maybe they don't deserve to win in the end. And I think the author tried to hide that twist by burying it under novel stereotypes? Like, everyone is physically acting out their traditional hero roles beat for beat: the detective is solving the mystery, the daughter is looking for her missing father, the masked vigilante is taking care of his neighborhood and his child, that sort of thing. But when you actually analyze their motivations for doing these things, even if they're doing the right thing, it's so clear that they're doing it for the wrong reasons, that it starts being like...should I be rooting for them at all? Like, even if they win, and everything works out in the end, does that still count as a happy ending when such bad people are still wandering around, having everything they wanted? It's cool. It's gotten me pretty emotional in a few places too," Kaito admitted with a grin.

"Shuuichi will be okay. I'll check in on him tomorrow. I couldn't get him to come to the door today, but he's probably just resting. I really appreciate that librarian lady helping him out. I thought she was kind of off putting when I first met her, but I guess I misjudged her. Her scars are awesome. I wish half my scars looked as cool!"

Huh...that was interesting. Not something he often found in fiction. Sure, there were plenty of stories with morally grey characters, but...for the whole cast to, not even be morally grey, but maybe...dark grey? And then to have them play out the hero-roles? He'd have to give it a read after Kaito was done with it--and had given him his no-doubt stellar review.

Kokichi hummed softly and let his eyes close as Kaito moved onto his other hand. "Nao-chan's cool...but she is off-putting. Like...she'd never give you poison ivy, but if she saw that...you were gonna go walk around some in shorts? She'd watch and take notes...before taking you to a pharmacy... Writers...you know?"

Most of what people knew about the capital city riots around the time he was born came from her. She didn't join in, not to stop them either, but just...recorded everything. She'd almost been killed by them at one point, but, the woman who was now her wife, Yasu Todoa, had hidden Nao in her home...where Nao had confessed to knowing when the riots were going to break out through her connections in the LRG community.

...apparently, in the same riot that had killed Miyako, a very close friend of Nao's had also died and it had just...destroyed Nao's perspective. That things just happened and none of it mattered. And, feeling the guilt from knowing so much and doing nothing with it, she'd told Yasu everything.

It was how Aiichi had been able to calm everyone down, for the most part. How he'd been able to talk with LRG supporters and replace the leadership with more capable people.

Growing up around her, Kokichi knew Nao wasn't...the most compassionate person, but she was determined to use her observations to benefit people. Mostly through her writing, these days, but still.

With a snort, Kokichi caught himself dozing off, and while that was okay... "...hmm... we should...go see the haunted house she helps organize...shoul' be starting up...soon..."

...Haunted house?

Uh...errrrr...shit.

"Yeah? Yeah! That sounds...like a thing we could do!" Kaito said, a tad too loudly, finishing up Kokichi's other wrist, taking up his hand and kissing against his bound pinky to indicate he was done before laying his arm down again, leaning down to kiss Kokichi's cheek lightly, saying in a more normal tone, "If Maki or Shuuichi suggest that I can't handle a haunted house, just know, it's entirely slander and lies. Your husband is very brave, all the time."

Kaito went to collect the bag and the pudding cups, intending to put the bag in Kokichi's candy drawer and use the cool temperature of the bathroom to keep the pudding cups fresh for later, because fuck, do we have mini-fridges in this universe?? Damn it Iruma, fix the narrative corner we've put ourselves in already! Gah!

Sorry, sorry. The narrator's voice is going back to normal now. Riiiiight...now.

-

"...what do you mean you want me to ask one of the Luminaries to come in for a fitting?" Hajime asked. His temple twitching dangerously on his forehead as he started in open disbelief at two of his fellow housekeepers, who looked back at him in embarrassment, one of them holding a pair of black pants.

"Well...you are kinda...I mean..." said the meeker housekeeper, blushing slightly as she shrugged, glancing at the ground, "You're...you know..."

"You're their favorite," the other housekeeper pointed out more bluntly, just giving Hajime a passive, annoyed look as he said, "Every time one of the Luminaries wants anything, they always ask for you. I heard you're getting a raise for it and everything. So, if you're getting a raise, you gotta go ask the embarrassing questions."

Hajime grit his teeth, rubbing his forehead. "Who...told you I was getting a raise?"

"Susan," both the housekeepers said at once.

Fucking Susan. Course it was her. Nosy little--uuuugh.

"Why do you even need Kaito to come in for a fitting?" Hajime asked, rolling his eyes. "If this is about that 'size' debate you all had when he first got here-"

"That's already been settled," one housekeeper said dismissively.

The other one blushed. "Yeah...turns out I was closest to right. Only off by a half inch!"

"I don't want to know how you know that, and also, stop doing things like that," Hajime said, another twitch in his eye. "So then why?"

"It's not him. It's his escort. The guy. It's...look, look at this," the housekeeper said, opening up the pants, showing...was the crotch cloth fraying? "ALL of his pants are like this. One of these days, he's gonna bend over, and everyone around him is BOOM, gonna get an eyeful of cock. That's gonna suck for him. We're trying to be nice here. Which means you need to go tell him to come down here and get updated measurements."

"I...come on! That's...gah!"

"No one else wants to go up there and ask. Did you hear that the prince and Lake got into a fistfight this morning? They're scary...and you diiid get a raise for putting up with them, Hajime," the shyer housekeeper pointed out to him, twirling her hair in her hand as she gave him a side-eye.

"They're not scary, they're just weird...ya know what. Fine. Tomorrow, when I get back on shift, I'll go talk to the escort. For now just...line his pants with an extra layer of cloth. That should put off any tearing for a while. Got it?"

"Got it," the other two cheerily echoed back.

-

Nao had heard that the Luminaries tended to get up pretty early, and while she was hoping they'd decide to let Shuuichi sleep in after being sick the day before...it was better to be safe than sorry. And after what she'd found out the day before...it wasn't going to be just a quick visit.

Early, early in the morning, Nao shook off a quiet yawn as she made her way to the west wing of the third floor, silently unlocking Shuuichi's door and stepping inside before re-locking it. It was risky, and while she didn't think the Luminary Prince nor the assassin would hold off on murderous intent for any reason...it was a risk Nao was willing to take.

This little idiot was going to end up dead if no one interfered, and Nao already had her finger in this pie.

She'd left the jar with Dr. Kimura, though the doctor had told her that she wasn't sure if Shuuichi wouldn't be able to get more through another source. Considering the similarities in that party brew? Nao wasn't sure what his withdrawals would be like, but she had to stop him from getting any of that beer.

Until Dr. Kimura figured out a way to make...like, a counteragent, or something...the safest thing for Shuuichi was going to be weaning him off the pollen--which was what the small lick-sticker in Nao's pocket was for.

Going over to his bedside, Nao grimaced at the oily, sticky mess Shuuichi still was, and gently shook his shoulder.

Shuuichi's sleep had been full of nightmares. Some just strange and abstract, others truly terrifying and personal. At one point, he had been holding Maki's head, desperately looking for her body. She was already dead, but in the dream Shuuichi was convinced that if he could just find her body, he could still do something for her. He had babbled to her, crying, telling her, "It's okay, it's okay, I'll find it Maki, it's all gonna be okay, I'll find it, I'll find it!"

Going down hallway after hallway after hallway, running as fast as he could, clutching her head to his chest, have to find it, have to find it, have to fi-

When he was woken up, he was desperately hard again, his eyes rolling in his skull as his heart pounded in his chest, still lost in the dream for a moment as he said, desperately, "M-Maki?"

Then he took a breath, and oh god, the smell!

It was everywhere. Overpowering. The air reeked of the smell of sex. Fuck, fuck, it was...both repulsive and so fucking inviting...he groaned into his pillow, feeling sticky and uncomfortable, and his arms, why did his...h-he couldn't move his arms, something pulling against both of his wrists and, what was happe-

Shuuichi finally got his strained, puffy eyes to focus, looking up blearily and...ooooh. Oh, right. Her. Little by little, the memory of what had happened last night came back. He had...he had invited her in, and they had...

A spark of arousal at the memories shot through his stomach, and he felt himself start to breathe a little funny, his arousal both fighting with and spurred on by the wave of honest to god terror he felt looking at her. He wanted to run from this room. He wanted her to touch him again. It had felt so good. It had felt so good...

...god he was tired.

Shuuichi groaned as his body fought between arousal, terror, and exhaustion, looking away from the woman as he buried his face back into the pillow. He needed another dose. That was the problem. If it was the next day, which the just barely lightening darkness coming from his windows suggested it was, then it had been over twenty hours since his last dose. He wanted her to stay. To hit him. To touch him.

But he needed her to go. He needed his next dose.

And he didn't know what to say to her. So, his head buried in the pillow, unable to even kind of look at her, he said, "...please uncuff me..."

...this stuff had wrecked him, though what she had done the day before hadn't helped any. Through the information they both had, Nao and Seiko had a pretty good guess that Shuuichi was the only one in town taking the pollen regularly, but if this is what happened to addicts...she hoped the doctor would find results quickly.

"Sorry, your friend probably won't be checking in on you for a little bit. Miss Harukawa and Prince Kaito were really worried, tell ya what! But they left you to rest off whatever weird bug you caught." Nao tilted her head a little and snorted softly at the total difference in demeanor...but, to be fair, he was probably still tired. "That's the first thing you ask? I was expecting you to whine for your drugs! Or even a shower."

She wrinkled her nose and took another look around Shuuichi's room, the sticky stain on his floor still untouched, if just drier. "Your body really is disgusting, Shuu. I can barely believe you could just sleep like that, but for a whore like you, being covered in your own juices is just comfortable, isn't it."

Terrible words. Terrible, terrible, terrible words...that shot through Shuuichi like electricity, his body literally twitching and curling into itself as his arousal worsened, his breath getting shakier as his toes curled, his eyes widening into the fabric.

Whore, whore, stupid, ugly, disgusting whore, what was he doing, what was he doing...

None of those terrible words could both excite and horrify him like the word 'drug' did though.

"What?" Shuuichi said, his voice tight, twisting around to look up at her, his eyes wide, his chest rising up and down as his breathing quickened into a pant, his whole body starting to tremble as he said, "W-what drugs!?"

Taking a seat on the edge of his bed, Nao sent the young man a disapproving look. "Shuu...you've been very naughty. Cruel to yourself, being, just, a horrible friend...can you imagine how Kaito and Maki will feel when they find out what you've been doing to yourself? And all that is just making you horny, isn't it?"

She shook her head, exasperated. She knew he was in a place logic wouldn't be able to reach him--which was why she hadn't told anyone but Seiko yet. Shuuichi needed to be less despair-addled before he would be able to be helped by his friends. Before realizing what he'd done to himself would do anything other than make him want to masturbate.

"This stuff is really bizarre. You'd think after all the attention I gave you yesterday, you'd need a break, but no," she gave his thigh a pat, "Here you are, already getting worked up. I could lead you around town buck naked and let all the people your friend has been drugging fuck you, and that still wouldn't satisfy you, huh? I wonder if you would've still been so curious to poison yourself with despair if you knew at the time it'd unleash your inner sex addict."

"You've made some really horrible mistakes, Shuu," she said, staring him in the eyes.

She knew? She knew!? How could she know?? Ho-ha--haaa!!

"NnnNN-NNGH! Ow, ow, haaa!" Shuuichi shuddered, his face going red and his knees curling closer to his chest, his dick, ow, OW, F-FUCK!!

His whole body trembled and spasmed as his cock fought against the sounding rod inside of him, his erection tightening around it, each jolt of pain making it worse, making it thicker. And against his cock’s head, something...something was there. Squeezing.

"Ahhh, a-ah! Hur-m, h-help, please, please, o-oh god." Shuuichi tried to kick the blanket off of himself, tried to see what was pinching the head of his cock like that, what was denying the little bit of cum that could even get around the rod in the first place, but as he tried to move his leg quickly, a pain shot from his ass up to his spine, that one so intense that he stopped moving entirely, panic of doing more damage to himself stilling him as he gasped, breathing heavily, drool pooling out as he tried to see through the sudden spots in his vision.

"S-stop, stop, leave me alone, uncuff me, please, please," Shuuichi rambled out, the second he could catch his breath again, his face bright red, his whole body tense and trembling. "I'm not taking any drugs, go away, please, please."

He was getting hard again, but...it seemed the pain affected him at least a little less it had the day before. And unlike the day before, he was asking her to stop and go away, so she wouldn't touch him. But that didn't mean it was responsible for her to leave.

Gently, Nao took off his blanket, leaving Shuuichi to see what had become of his, rising, still, really?? Penis.

"Ah, really, you're not taking any drugs? So, if I left, you wouldn't rush to your closet and to your poison bag to guzzle down what you have left in that jar that isn't there anymore?" She sighed, unsure what she could actually do to help him. So...she could just tell him the facts.

"Shuu, you're going to be incredibly sore and sensitive right now--no normal person could've done what you did yesterday. You took...I don't know, a combined circumference of four, five inches into your anus? If I looked, I'd bet you're still gaping. Not to mention how many times you came, even when I put a metal rod up your dick. I was worried you'd keep cumming in your sleep, no doubt getting off to nightmares, so I put a cock ring on you."

"Moving at all is going to be incredibly painful for you right now--so keep that in mind for how much it excites you." Rolling her eyes, she turned more towards him and took a little lick-sticker out of her pocket, showing it to Shuuichi. "If you want your dose today, stick your tongue out."

"It's...n-not there anymore?" Shuuichi whispered, looking up at her, looking for the lie on her face, feeling panic well up in him as he saw nothing there but a calm disgust at the sight of him. "No, no, no, no, please, please, you don't understand, I-I need it I need it where-!? AHH-HAh!!!-aaa haaaa." Shuuichi closed his eyes, trying to breathe through his erection, through his need, trying to think at the same time as his body desperately tried again to cum.

A cock ring? Is that what was doing this to him? No, no, if he came, then he could start thinking again, and if he could think, he could figure out what exactly had happened to his jar, where was it, what had she done with it!? "Please, please, Nao, M-miss Nao, I need to cum, please take it off, please, it's s-so much, it's good, it feels so good, it feels so good-"

He hadn't meant to say that last line, the words spilling out of him, as compulsive as his panicked 'no's' and his desperate 'please's'. He needed his dose. He needed her to go away to get his dose. He needed to cum. He needed her to stay to cum. All four of these things were true, and those contradictions were going to drive him insane.

...wait, did...did she have some? Did she have some of his pollen? If he could get his dose, he would feel better. He could start getting a grip on what was happening. At the very least what was physically happening to him would feel, just...soooo much better...

He looked up at her, desperate for his dose, desperate to cum, and his face beet-red and his eyes hazy with lust and need, he opened his mouth for her, sticking out his tongue, drenched with a layer of drool he hadn't been able to swallow down.

"Ah, there it is," she murmured, looking on impassively in the wake of Shuuichi's panic. "That's what addicts usually sound like."

When they had started to discuss what to do about Shuuichi, Nao had wanted to cut him off right then and there, partially for his own health, and also because Seiko mentioned that the withdrawals would likely be pleasurable for him, and, fuck, wasn't that fascinating? The doctor hadn't really wanted to give him more pollen either, but in her experience, it was usually a bad idea to cut addicts off completely. So Seiko had prepared the stickers, something that would dissolve on the tongue and were smaller doses than what Shuuichi had likely been giving himself, all with dwindling amounts until she could deem it actually safe to cut him off.

Tsking at the display in front of her, Nao pressed the sticker to Shuuichi's tongue, sneering at the boy. "Do you have any idea of how disgusting you look right now? If it weren't for the other effects, I'd think this was just the freakiest aphrodisiac in the world. Pff," she snorted suddenly. "I wonder what else you'd open your mouth for in a heartbeat?"

"Now, take a moment to calm down, and then tell me exactly what you want. We can work from there."

Terrible words, terrible words, words that bit and scratched and scarred and felt s-so good, felt so good, there it was, there was that taste, spoiled wine, there, there, there...Shuuichi swallowed down whatever it was Miss Nao had just given him. He knew it was his pollen, could taste it, but didn't understand...what he had actually just had pressed against his tongue.

But he could feel it almost immediately, that heat inside of him, warming his blood as his heart pounded faster, the best kind of fever rushing through him as the pollen started to spread inside of him.

Some of the panic was starting to go away now. Or, at least, the traditional effects of panic was starting to go away, and Shuuichi smiled sloppily, staring at the ceiling, enjoying the feeling of all the misery he had just been in moments before easing and twisting inside of himself, warming him and exciting him.

"Th-thank you, Miss Nao...that's better...that's so much b-better...y-you're so nice to me..." He looked over at her, his desperate terror of her comfortably re-aligning itself inside of him, plain, open, lewd arousal on his face as he stared at her, smiling and breathing heavily. "For you, Miss Nao? Anything. I'd open my mouth for anything you want...want to be your dirty whore...a good slut for Miss Nao..."

Shuuichi was still trembling, his dick aching and shooting shards of pain through his stomach every time he so much as twitched wrong, but none of that was bothering him now. Felt good. Felt so good...

Nao's eyebrows raised as she just blinked at the boy for a moment. That had been. Fast. Both the effects of the pollen and how quickly he'd internalized the abuse she'd yelled at him. Oh boy...that was gonna be a big issue for him to overcome down the line.

But, just like the mess of his room, not her problem.

"Oh come on, you know that drugging you and feeding your addiction isn't "nice"," she scoffed. "And I'm not here to help you out right now, either--you think I want to spend my morning taking care of a needy slut? I came in early for this..."

Nao groaned, truly lamenting the extra time she could've spent at home. "No. I'm going to uncuff you, we're gonna empty you out, then it's your decision to get yourself cleaned up in time for your friends coming to check on you. Or to explain why you stink of sex when you spent all yesterday hurling from the stomach bug you caught."

"Though, I think you might've permanently stained your floor with your freaky juices." She tapped her heel against the stain as she walked past it, finding the key to the handcuffs. "A testament to a pervert, I suppose."

Shuuichi frowned, his stomach flipping, devastated as he realized this wasn't leading to a repeat performance from yesterday. Sure, literally five minutes ago, he hadn't wanted to repeat that...had actually really, really wanted her to leave...but his erection pressed tightly to his stomach now, having managed to rise entirely despite the rod fighting it every step of the way, and his brain was heavy and comfortable in a new dose of despair, all his panic and uncertainty he had felt waking up gone.

It was...it was so hard to think like this...all he could think about was his erection, begging for relief. And the way she treated him...didn't help. Every time she spoke, a new rush of arousal accompanying the despair she made him feel...so good, so good, so~ooooooo good...

But as helpless as he was to his lust, to the need burning inside of him right now, something she said got through to him. ...he couldn't...he couldn't let his friends know anything was wrong. They'd worry. They'd ask questions.

They'd make him stop.

"I can't tell them," Shuuichi said, his voice tense, his usual intelligent self desperately trying to think through the haze of lust, but his consciousness floundering, his thoughts disjointed, slipping between his fingers like the weird mucus shit that was, at this moment, starting to drip from his ass. "...they won't understand...they'd make me stop..."

Shuuichi looked up as Miss Nao came back, the key to his cuffs in her hands. Finally he actually looked at her, confused. "If you don't want to fuck me...then w-why are you here? I d-don't understand..."

"Obviously," Nao sighed, tugging out one of Shuuichi's arms and forcing him to lie on his back as she started to uncuff him. "You don't understand anything. I don't have enough data to say for sure, but it at least seems like this stuff is making you dumber. At least whores don't have much use for brains."

From as much as she could guess, it seemed to be more shifting his focus into only caring about sex, so all the observations and intelligence the young man had shown before? Now all funneled into ways to get off.

Once she'd gotten the cuffs off, Nao tossed them and the key to the side, giving Shuuichi a stern look. "Cup yourself. I'm going to release your cock ring, and you're going to catch everything and enjoy the rancid breakfast you've made yourself. I doubt you can make it to the bathroom on your own, so that's the closest to clean you'll get."

"If you had been more thankful and less disgusting yesterday, maybe I could've stuck around and helped you not make a total fool out of yourself in front of your friends, but I'm not sticking around for when they come to check on you, so good luck explaining this," she gestured out to his smelly, sticky, morphed body, "yourself."

Shuuichi groaned as his arms were finally allowed to go back to their more natural positions in front of him, the ache in his shoulder sending another little warm rush through him even as he closed his eyes and hissed in pain. Once the wave passed, he looked up warily at her. She was big...she stood over him like a tower, and her eyes...even under the drug, her eyes were so hard to look at, and Shuuichi immediately felt himself look away, like yesterday, the discomfort from looking at her a different sort of misery from the pain that stimulated him.

...he wasn't going to be able to walk...she couldn't leave him like this...he couldn't ask his friends for help...

But his fears for what his day was actually going to look like were dwarfed by the shiver of sheer ELATION at the promise that she would remove the cock ring, his heart up-ticking immediately and his breath quickening in anticipation as he immediately followed her order, cupping his hands roughly at where his dick was aimed, saying in a rush, "Thank you, thank you, I'm sorry, I'll be better, I'm grateful, I want Miss Nao to let me cum, I'll try t-to not make a bad expression this time..."

Daring to look back up at her, just for a second, he breathed, "P-please hurt me..."

God, he was desperate. Was this a sort of, 'an ignorant population is an easily controlled one' type of deal? There was a loooooot you could get away with if people were too focused on fucking each other.

She rolled her eyes as she found the latch on the ring, his head glossy and red and so painfully swollen around the rod inserted in it...but he hadn't noticeably grown since the day before, so at least there wasn't that. However, Nao paused at Shuuichi's request, shooting him a harsh glare.

"You think you have any right to ask anything of me right now? I'm letting you drain your disgusting cock, and that's already more than you deserve. You came over and over yesterday, Shuu, and look at yourself, already full and about to burst. It's only that I respect Kokichi and the others that I'm putting the ring back on you when you're done--I am not going to subject them to seeing you helplessly jizz at every little thing."

And with that, she popped the latch, the ring immediately falling open.

Shuuichi stared back at her in shock, shame rocketing through him at her abuse, his request, which he had made almost mindlessly, now immediately filling him with regret as his body trembled in fear. He could feel tears start to burn at the edge of his vision, even as his body tensed, his legs struggling through their pain as he widened them, making himself more open and available for her touch.

H-he hadn't meant to be hard! He had woken up like this! He hadn't done this on purpose! He...h-he had just wanted to feel b-better...i-it wasn't his fault...

The pollen made him feel better!

As a wave of despair and pleasure hit him, what she had said about the cock ring going back on afterwards filling him with a sense of dread and panic, he felt her hand go onto his dick and-

"AHHHHHH!! Ah, AH! haaa!! NNNNnnNNnnnnhhhh thank you, thank you, oh no, 'm sorry, 'm sorry, ooooo~h-h-h..." Shuuichi remembered the last second that his expression was gross, and he hid his face in his pillow as his hands cupped his dick, catching the long stream of cum with his hands the very best he could, his whole body violently shaking and trembling as a few more tears fell down his cheeks. "'m sorry, 'm sorry, thank you Miss Nao, thank you..."

As his body started to calm down, the shivers still coming in bursts as more and more cum trickled out, slow to work its way around the rod inside of him, Shuuichi found himself worrying that he hadn't managed to catch all of it, that he wasn't being good. Miss Nao was so kind to him, she made him feel so good, he didn't want to disappoint her, so he looked down at himself, daring to take his hands away to see if he had caught it all.

A lot of the cum was on his hands (and there was so much of it...he didn't even know he was capable of spilling that much), but he could see it was already starting to slide down his palms, and to his dismay he saw a few drops pool off and fall onto the mattress below. Desperate to please, Shuuichi glanced up at Miss Nao to see if she was upset with him, before bringing his hands to his mouth accommodatingly, lapping at his drippings quickly, running his tongue up his wrist to catch the parts that were sliding down his arms.

His sex tasted thick, and as he lapped it up, he found he was actually really struggling to swallow it down, it coating and hanging onto the back of his tongue, even though he swallowed again and again, trying to take it down. He suddenly found himself coughing, choking on trying to swallow his own cum...but the cough did the trick, and a particularly persistent glob of it finally went down.

Cum still sticking between his tongue and his upper mouth in thin, persistent lines, but otherwise clean from his fingers, Shuuichi looked up at Nao, just barely looking to the left of her eyeline, breathing heavy as he said, "Thank you...thank you..."

She made a few indistinct sounds of disgust as she watched Shuuichi cum--just from the second he was able. In all fairness, he was aroused because of the pain he was in, all building up through the night and morning, but, from his perspective and of anyone who didn't know...she didn't even touch him. Had just released the ring, and there he went.

Cumming almost steadily despite the rod in his phallus. Letting Shuuichi cum was in part to build his dependence, yeah, but...he would seriously injure himself if he didn't cum...god. What was his minimum now? She was going to low ball it at twice a day, but, had he the ability to walk, she could easily imagine Shuuichi shyly bothering her every few hours for release.

It was nuts.

Nao watched him guzzle down his cum--more than an average load, by a lot--and used that time to close the ring back up before she popped it back over his head.

And then, just for fun, she flicked the end of the sounding rod.

"You really can't even stop it, can you," she laughed cruelly. "No, little Shuu is just too much of a messy slut to be anything else. Oh well. Good luck explaining all of this away, hun."

And she stood, making moves to leave.

Was it...was it already back on? He felt her hands on him again for a moment, and his flash of excitement at the idea that maybe she had wanted to fuck him after all fell into dismay as he realized...w-why? W-why was she...

"Ha! Ah...m~hmmm!" Shuuichi involuntarily twitched and gasped, his vision clouding again, another wave of intense pain and hopeless arousal waving through him...it was almost nauseating. Lust and despair sat at the bottom of his stomach, like a pile of acid, eating and biting away at him. It made him feel sick...which was maybe a good thing.

As he breathed through what had just happened, Shuuichi felt his head clear a little again...still lost, but...cumming really did help...it was a little easier to think...where...where was she-?

"No, no, wait, please!" Shuuichi said, staring at her leave, panic washing through him, Shuuichi hugging his arms to himself and, carefully, closing his legs as he looked desperately at her. "Please, I...Kaito and Maki are going to come in. Th-they'll insist...I can't...I can't let them see me like this...please M-Miss Nao...I'm dirty, please...hic...hurp...h-help me..."

He voice choked on this last part, tears burning, stinging at his eyes, just aware that if she left right now, he was genuinely, actually doomed...he wouldn't be able to keep them out...if they knocked and he didn't answer, they'd worry...if he answered and they could hear the state of him, they'd worry...Maki would insist...Kaito said Kokichi could pick locks...

He couldn't help himself. He needed her.

...so, what should she do?

Having Shuuichi's friends see him like this would slap them so hard up the heads that they'd have to realize that something was wrong with him. Which, they really should realize sometime soon, but...for after Shuuichi recovered? Knowing that his friends had seen him like this? ...don't push him over the edge, Nao. Now or later.

However, she didn't want to be caught in his room--which was supposed to be locked. Even if she tried to explain, she had a feeling the Luminaries would just be dead set on the assumption that she had done this to him. That would be a mess, and in that mess, Shuuichi might have the chance to start having secrets again.

...but she could help him out enough that he could face his friends for just a moment, enough to...ask for a doctor...

A plan started to form in the librarian's head as she walked to the door before stopping and turning back to the poor boy.

"Oh? So...if you really want my help...you'll do whatever I say? After all, I certainly know better than a sloppy fuckhole, don't I? And no amount of despair from disobeying me will make you act on your own? I don't have any stakes in this, dear--I can just leave whenever you disappoint me too much."

Somewhere in Shuuichi's addled, drugged, sex-crazed brain, a still rational part of him warned, 'this is a trick.'

But as a shiver ran through his body at being called another terrible thing (what was he doing, what was he doing, how had this spiraled out of control so quickly, he had been fine not that long ago, right, what was this!?), he couldn't bring himself to care. It was like with Tengan, during the wedding, which felt like years ago by this point; he knew he was being fucked with. He knew there was something about the situation that he wasn't understanding...

...but he was so desperate that it didn't matter.

He'd deal with it. Whatever this was going to end up being, he'd deal. H-he was the smart one, right? Th-the second he could start to think again...the second he could get in control of himself again, he'd work out what this woman's deal was (because this was definitely about more than just getting her kicks out of Shuuichi...right??) and start working to protect himself from it. He'd get his jar back. Or, he'd go to Itch and beg him for help. He'd get this worked out. He could do it!

H-he could still kill Luminary...end that miserable, dead end part of the world...and everyone would be happy. Kaito's wouldn't be anyone's toy again. Maki could stop feeling helpless and endlessly worrying about her (their) doomed siblings. Kokichi wouldn't have to hear about any more scary Luminary stories that literally take his breath away.

He could still do it. He could protect his friends. He could burn the whole place down...

...o-once he got under control again...

Feeling that fear and shame and hatred...Shuuichi giggled, staring at Miss Nao with something closed to crazed adoration, tears still streaming down his cheeks mindlessly. Curling his knees into himself, tremors still going through his body as the metal poking out of the end of his dick shifted with his movement, he nodded with another mad, little giggle, "I...I'll do whatever you say...won't disobey...please don't go. Please help me."

"You know, somehow I don't believe you," she sighed, but Nao came back into the room anyway, going over to his window and cracking it open, hoping that at least some of the odor would dissipate. "Okay, I'm going to draw a bath for you, and we're going to attempt to get some of your filth off you. At least not have you smelling like a pigsty."

"Then, when your friends come knocking on your door, you're going to answer it. They're going to get one look at the absolute mess you are, and be ever so worried...and you're going to ask them for a doctor."

"Maybe it's more than a stomach bug, you don't know, but you just feel wretched...and, in that vulnerable state, you're going to ask for Dr. Kimura, a healer that you actually know in comparison to the castle healers." She fixed Shuuichi with a stern look. "Seiko was fucking pissed when she realized that you'd lied to her about everything, Shuu. Not that anyone is, but I can't imagine she'll be very happy to see you."

If Seiko could properly observe his symptoms, then, along with her research on the pollen itself...they might really have a shot.

Walking towards his bathroom, Nao laid down some ground rules. "No drinking, and don't even think about asking your little friend for more pollen. Don't tell anyone I was here past just helping you to your room yesterday. And no cumming on your own. If you feel like you can't take it, you can plead me to take your ring off. If I let you hump anything you see, you're just going to end up cumming on your friends, and we can't have that, can we?"

And with that, she started the bath.

"They'd make such cute sounds..." Shuuichi murmured, holding himself tighter and closing his eyes now that she wasn't in the room, shivering and shaking, feeling clearer now that he had cum, but not feeling any calmer, his brain heavy with shitty, awful daydreams as he murmured, mostly to himself, "Kaito hides his eyes in his hands when he's overwhelmed...he's always done that, since we were kids...so cute...and Maki...she gets scary, the more scared she gets...trying to be bigger and more dangerous than whatever she's facing...I wish she'd cut me like she does Kaito..."

Shuuichi giggled, the last of the tears fading away as he got lost in his comfortable daydream, "...Kokichi turned blue when he fell...cute..."

...how did she know about Itch?

...oh NO...

...FUCK...

"...Seiko knows?" Shuuichi realized, her words catching up to him, pushing past the sex-filled haze of his brain, Shuuichi looking towards the bathroom door in increasing concern, the sweat on his face just getting worse with the stress as he realized the implications of this. "No...I needed her help. I was...I was trying to understand..."

...Shuuichi couldn't remember what he was trying to understand.

No, no, he did. He was trying to understand the healing properties. The way his shoulder wound almost seemed to grow a sort of fungus around it, the healing process effortless. Almost entirely painless. And way, way too quick to be normal...but the wound had closed up ages ago, and he had kept taking it, because...he felt better. And stronger. And like the world was less intimidating and overwhelming and scary...and more fun. Exciting. Arousing...

...not allowed to go see Itch (could she stop him?)...Seiko, who had told him not to take the medicine, was now supposed to be his doctor...and she had taken his jar...

..."Oh no," Shuuichi whispered, closing his eyes tightly as he realized, despair and stress and arousal and...just a sheer exasperation at what he now understood this was. "...you're trying to get me off the pollen."

Nao knelt by the tub and held her hand under the tap, adjusting the temperature, actually to something comfortable, if a little on the warm side. If he was still gaping, then anything cold might send him into shock. It was one thing to not push someone over the edge, but to stop someone from destroying themself? She didn't know how Kokichi did it.

Once the tub was full and plugged, Nao returned to the poor addict, just in time to hear his realization. And, scooping him up into her arms, she sighed, exasperated. "Duh. You're pretty dumb if you're only figuring that out now, huh?"

His body was still in rough shape, and not just his altered penis. The welts on his thighs and backside--from what she could see around him without a proper look for the time being--were still reddened and raised, looking like they'd start bruising soon. His nipples still looked swollen as well, and she'd bet they were still sensitive. And the lusty, distraught, excited expression on his face...

"Gross..." she groaned to herself as she carried the man into the bathroom. "But you're still fascinating to watch degrade--like keeping track of a rotting corpse. And it's just for that reason that I'm willing to help you out, Shuu. It would just be annoying for an experiment like you to have to be shipped off back to Luminary, and you wouldn't even have to be trained for a new job--I wonder if they knew when they first started digging into your brain that you'd be best suited to be sold as a fucktoy."

She was taking a few leaps. Back when the Luminary Party had still been at the castle, Nao had been overjoyed to speak to the foreigners, finding out alllll about the nasty rumors of the country. And plenty of people had been willing to speak about something called the Indentured Citizen Program. Basically brainwashing people into slavery, making it so they could never escape, while reporting that there actually was an option, technically. It was honestly horrific...

And whenever she spoke about anything close to it, Shuuichi had looked like true fear had broken through what the pollen had done to him. While that spoke volumes on how horrible the "program" was...it was one of the boy's last true emotions. So...to get him to behave...it was going to be what she had to use.

Shuuichi went very quiet.

As he held onto her shoulders, only wincing a little as each little step she took bounced him slightly against her, something that maybe would have felt comforting, if his dick wasn't trying to fight through its own post-cum sensitivity to get hard again, he just...stared somewhere in the middle distance...his face blank as his brain processed what she just said.

He was taken out of his head a little when she put him in the tub, the heat against his insides almost genuinely unbearable for a second, the detective feeling water against part of his ass that had never been exposed to anything before yesterday, and something inside there still hurt badly...something ripped up and under the stress of 4 to 5 inches of girth...but his body adjusted quickly, and when he let go of her, he immediately clutched the side of the tub, steadying himself. Trying to think.

"...what do you mean..." Shuuichi said quietly. Entirely unable to look at her. "...I'm a Dicean now...I...the king told Maki...that we didn't have to be worried about that..."

No, no, no, he couldn't...they couldn't send him back, right? They couldn't take him away from Maki and Kaito. They couldn't, right? He couldn't go back. H-he was compromised. He had been living with the enemy, they'd...they'd want to make sure his conditioning was still in place...th-they'd send him back to therapy. He only had three years left on his contract, but the cost of the conditioning therapy itself...he'd end up right back in another contract for the debt...

...would they send him to a brothel?

It wasn't something orphans usually had to worry about. The one line Luminary had decided not to cross. Orphans couldn't be put into brothel contracts.

...But criminals? People under debt contracts?

Shuuichi would be fair game.

"...I was a good detective. I did what they said. I did what I was supposed to. They wouldn't send me to a brothel...??" Shuuichi said, his voice soft and fast and anxious, clutching the side of the tub hard, his eyes wide, as he tried to convince himself. "I was good, I listened, I was obedient, I did what I was told, I did, I did, I did-"

There wasn't actually any risk of Shuuichi being sent to Luminary. Aiichi and Kokichi were sworn to protect Diceans, and the Luminaries, all four of them, were undeniably Diceans now. However, Shuuichi was more used to a world where government officials--royals and nobles--didn't care about their people, and would go back on their words from nothing more than a whim.

So, as long as Shuuichi had even the slightest doubt...she could use that.

Grabbing a washcloth, Nao started lathering it up with soap, getting started on cleaning Shuuichi up. "Shuu, you were allowed to come to Dicea and live here as one of Prince Kaito's escorts. Not to become a drug addict and play in bed with terrorists that want to kill everyone."

"Aiichi is kind, but you really think he'd protect just you over the countless lives that the Remnants would destroy?" She shook her head, grabbing Shuuichi by a wrist and scrubbed down his arm, paying particular attention to the sweatier parts of him. "You, who neglected to protect your prince from any of the threats he's faced while here, not to mention all the abuse he went through back in Luminary. Really, I don't know why he's still friends with you since you've done nothing but fail over and over. You're not special, Shuu, and you have no purpose, so, to get a threat out of the castle? I'd think Aiichi could make an exception and nullify your papers, giving you a kick in the pants back to your beloved home nation."

"And, god, you're so delusional!" Nao huffed a cruel laugh, matching her meanness as she began to scrub Shuuichi's chest, not holding back on his swollen nipples. "You think anyone in Luminary would take more than a look at you before knowing exactly where you belong? Not to mention that those secretaries from before are real pissed at Kaito and Kokichi, and of course they're the type to take that frustration out on others. That sex offender, Miss Yukizome, she might even decide to keep you as a pet! That might be the most honored position you'll ever get!"

"If you do as you're told, then you'll fit right in, spreading your legs and opening your mouth at a moment's notice."

Shuuichi's eyes were the size of saucer bowls as she scrubbed him down, and instead of flushed red, he looked...pale. When she started to scrub his chest, and he felt that arousing ache start to begin again, he pulled away from her, placing his hand on the washcloth in her hands and saying, without look at her, exhausted and meek, "Wait, wait, I can...please, I can do it myself...th-thank you, Miss Nao, I can do it...please?"

He had almost expected another round of verbal abuse, maybe for her to get even rougher against his skin (and a part of him wanted this. A LARGE part of him wanted this...b-but he felt sick, right now. He felt sick. He was scared...), but was surprised when she just gave him a look, letting him take it from her. Trying to be gentler on himself, running the washcloth over his body carefully, trying not to...arouse himself anymore because...he n-needed to think...

...everything she was saying...made sense.

Everything she was saying made sense.

Itch was a terrorist. Shuuichi hadn't thought of the beginner brewer like that...but he was a Remnant of Despair...and they were a terrorist group. A terrorist group that wanted to literally end the species...and Shuuichi had only wanted to join them to target Luminary...but that didn't change the fact that he had...

Of course the king would get rid of him. That made sense. It would be actual insanity if that wasn't how he reacted.

A-and...if Shuuichi went back...h-his body was strange now. Even Shuuichi could tell by this point, that something was seriously wrong with his body. Even if he had been a good detective...with the way his body was now...even if it wasn't Secretary Chisa, like Miss Nao mocked, someone would probably find what was happening to him fascinating...s-someone would want the indentured who gets harder and harder the more you hit him...

...that part was...almost appealing, in its own twisted way, and Shuuichi closed his eyes, trying to fight his desire for that. He had to stay sane! He had to stay sane! If he started thinking like that, he'd be taken away from Kaito and Maki! That was...that was unacceptable! He couldn't...he...

...Kaito...would Kaito be better off without Shuuichi?

...well...historically?

It wasn't fair. Shuuichi hadn't even known Kaito then. He had just been the Luminary Prince that Shuuichi had only heard about, never seen. But even before they had met, Shuuichi had failed Kaito...literally a year before that purple-eyed, red-headed boy had come bounding into Shuuichi's life, insisting that he was amazing! And incredible! And that he had to come meet his friend Maki, who was just as cool and amazing as you, and all three of us will be cool together!!

...Shuuichi was the reason Kaito's mentor...why her death was never...why Tengan was allowed to just keep...

Shuuichi started to shake, trying to lift up his knees, at first to scrub on the underside of himself, and then, when the effort proved too much, the ache too bad against the arousal in his crotch, he gave up, just resting his arms and head against his knee as he said, urgently, "I can't...I can't be taken away from Kaito...I k-know I'm not special, but...I can't leave him. I need to watch out for him, please, please don't tell anyone what I did, Miss Nao. I won't go back to Itch, I promise, I'll listen to the rules. I'll ask for Seiko. I-I won't touch myself without permission, I promise, I promise, please don't send me back, p-please..." he said, his voice once against starting to choke with sobs.

...it was horrible and unfair, all the things that had happened to Shuuichi. And Nao was well aware that it was unfair of her to take advantage of those wounds...but she could not allow him to keep taking the pollen. To work alongside people who would hurt, not just the people they both cared about, but...everyone. This...would really, really hurt Shuuichi, but well...good thing it was Nao that found him, then.

Because scaring people was one of the things she did best.

...and, maybe as a bonus, he'd given her a name. And while there was a lot she was willing to keep undercover...names were something she could pass along to Aiichi without any other issues coming up.

"Well, at least reason hasn't completely fled your mind," she sighed, taking the washcloth back from Shuuichi. "Shuu's dirty, disgusting, shameful secret is safe with me and Dr. Kimura. You can just get off to the concern and pity your friends will give you, since they'll just think you're sick. Now, rest on your side so I can wash your back--you're just going to sully yourself back up with your freaky ass-juice, but I can at least try to salvage what I can."

"I'm looking out for you, Shuu, against my better judgment. But the second you try to get more pollen? You can kiss your freedom goodbye."

...his friends were going to have a hell of a time fixing him.

-

Kaito didn't feel the first three small balls of paper at all...and when he started to wake up, he barely felt the fourth one.

When the fifth one fell directly into his ear, Kaito opened one eye, grunting, pulling Kokichi closer to himself as he looked around blearily, glaring as he said, "Maki...what are you doing?"

"I got bored," Maki admitted, ripping another line from the loose sheet of paper she had clearly stolen from the vanity desk, rolling it up into a tiny ball and, as Kaito looked at her in exasperation, flicked it at his face with a small, round smile. "And your shift starts in fifteen minutes. You need to go shower and stuff before you relieve me."

"Maki, you've gotten little paper balls all over the bed...were you flicking those at Kokichi?" Kaito demanded, seeing easily seven just in eyesight, on Kokichi's shoulders, in his hair, one in his eyelashes, come onnnnn....

"I've been bored for awhile," Maki admitted, ripping another piece. "And he's a more sound sleeper then you are, at least right now. Bet I could knock off the one on his eyelash."

"Maki, stop flicking trash on my husband," Kaito said sternly, reaching out to brush off the piece on his eyelash carefully,."Honestly, he has so many books. Just read something if you're bored."

Maki only responded by flicking another piece at Kaito. Smirking as he groaned.

Not as sound as she'd think! ...though, hearing how many paper balls Kaito remarked on...probably still more sound than Kaito.

After a moment, Kokichi softly echoed his husband's groan and weakly nuzzled his chest, indulging in the contact for a good moment before Kaito would have to get up. "...'f Maki-chan wants more hobbies, I'm sure plen'ny of people have ideas..."

Squinting his eyes open, Kokichi huddled down in the blankets as much as he was able. "...you know how to make paper stars? You're already tearing lines good enough for 'em."

Right on target, he was feeling better than he had yesterday. Maybe enough to try sitting up on his own again. From what the healer had told him yesterday, they still wanted him to wear the pulse monitor, just in case, but it wasn't looking like there would be any additional complications to how this usually went, despite his attack being quite a bit worse than he'd had in a long time.

...and the hitches he'd had yesterday were his own fault through stress so...

Rubbing his eyes sleepily, Kokichi sent Maki a soft, concerned look. He really needed to talk with Kaede...

She saw the look of concern on his face...and flicked another piece at him. "Bam," she said, another little smirk, "right between the eyes. What's paper stars? If I guess they were decorative stars made out of paper, would I be right?"

Kaito brushed some of the balls off of Kokichi, before leaning down to give him a kiss on his forehead, then pulled himself out of bed. Okay. Shower, teeth, hair, relieve Maki. Easy start to the day. "Just give me fifteen minutes, Maki, I'll be in and out," Kaito promised, heading to the bathroom.

When he closed the door behind him, Maki said, "I'll give him twenty before I go in there and drag him away from the mirror." Then she stretched from her seat on the desk chair, balling up the rest of the paper and binning it as she said, "How are you feeling, Kokichi? Are you ready for tea?"

The concern eased from his face a bit and Kokichi rolled his eyes. "Ah, you got me. I should never doubt your sniping skills. You might even give Fuyuji-chan a run for his money."

He hummed a lazy assent at her question, eyes drifting to his bookshelves. "You fold long strips of paper in a way that makes...these cute little puffy stars. You can use any kind of paper, but I know they make specially cut and printed strips at the stationary story. 'res an old legend that if you make a thousand and put them in a jar, then you can make a wish on it that will come true..."

Among his books were a few dusty jars, obviously filled with multicolored somethings.

"...think it's just a way to keep kids preoccupied...but I made a lot when I was little to help with motor skills."

Kokichi gave his husband a smile in thanks for the kiss before laughing softly at Maki's...not actually that generous time limit, knowing Kaito. But, with a deep breath and shaking arms, Kokichi started to scoot himself up into a sitting position. "Got! It."

Maki nodded, leaving him to it as she went to pour him a glass. It was fresh, Kaito having completely forgotten to do it his shift, so Maki had made a quick run during hers. Sitting by his bedside, she waited patiently for him to sort himself out, holding up the cup, waiting to see if he would take it.

"If you want, I can keep hold of one side, so that if you lose your grip, it won't spill." She offered it plainly. Face impassive.

Kokichi hated the sounds that he filled the room with, the small grunts and pants as he put everything he had into getting his body working to even the smallest degree. But...even if he was still mostly held up by pillows, even if he had a sheen of sweat on his face from the effort...he was up. And, after a moment to catch his breath, Kokichi tentatively reached out to take the cup.

And, well, his face was already flushed to the degree it could be, but Kokichi just swallowed his pride. "...I'd...appreciate that..."

With Maki's help, he brought the cup to his mouth, able to drink the tea with slightly longer sips than he had in the past day, and, even though his hand trembled, he didn't drop the cup.

He did appreciate what the Luminaries did for him, that they let him try out his limits, and Kokichi knew that just doing that was really good! But it was still just embarrassing. Every time he fell asleep in the middle of a conversation, or when Kaito had to help him use the bathroom, or when he was completely limp to however the others adjusted him... He...he knew his illness wasn't his fault, but...it still felt like a failing on his part, especially when compared to Kaito and Maki and Shuuichi. Strong, brilliant people, who did have their own problems, but...

He sometimes couldn't believe that they'd want to rely on him.

"...I don't think I ever asked..." Kokichi started softly, content to be propped up for the time being. Maybe he could convince Kaito to let him eat the mousse for breakfast--with a spoon they'd gotten from the kitchens with yesterday's dinner. "How's Tim doing? I kinda...interrupted training in a shitty way..."

Maki was patient as he drank, and felt a curious amount of pride once he was done, though obviously she made no comment on it, just putting the cup down once it was empty and, quicker than either of them could comment on, wiping the little he had dribbled off his face with the handtowel.

Ah...Tim.

"He was worried about you. Based on my conversation with him later, I think he was convinced you were poisoned. He had apparently immediately headed to the kitchens to ask if anyone who wasn't supposed to have been there had stopped by," Maki smiled a little at this, shaking her head. "Maybe his little talks with Shuuichi are rubbing off on him... though, Shuuichi is right. He'd never have the patience to really learn the detective career track...anyway, I found him again later, and convinced him no one had tried to kill you. He seemed relieved. It was sweet, in its own way."

But then she frowned...and let out a frustrated little sigh. "But...he's been in a bit of a mood ever since Kaito let us know the front line fighters are coming back soon. I think he's nervous, and it's making him reckless. Lashing out at people, wandering into places he shouldn't, giving up during training more frequently. I had to cut him when Miss Kawai said she found him trying to climb the outside part of the observational tower..." Maki sighed, rubbing her temples. "I don't really know what to do..."

Kokichi found a small smile on his own face. That was sweet--more than he had expected Tim to feel for him, at least. Though...Timothy, by being Maki's protege, was tasked with his and Kaito's safety, so...maybe if he thought that Kokichi had been attacked, then that would've been a failing on his part so... But it was sweet to hear he'd been worried, still.

But hearing about Tim's status in general made his smile drop and the worried look return to his face. And...he didn't know what to do about it either. "...None of them are going to fight him, if that's what he's worried about...but I don't know if a fight is what he'd want. ...you guys can be confusing that way," he sighed.

...there was a chance some of the returning veterans had killed people Tim knew...and that, in the reverse, people Tim knew could've killed...the people who weren't returning. Just that was more than enough to make anyone nervous and uncomfortable.

"...do you think talking to anyone would help him feel better? And...he still ignores pretty much everyone. He...probably wouldn't have to interact with the veterans at all..." Though...Kokichi did want to spend time with Ikuo when he returned. But Tim wasn't around him all the time, so...he could split the time?

Kokichi sighed again. "Sorry...I wish I had better ideas to give you."

Maki shrugged. "He doesn't want to talk to me about it, I've already tried. Maybe Kaito could have gotten through to him, but he's still upset with him over the school thing. Shuuichi maybe? ...other than us, I don't know anyone else he could talk to about it."

Maki sighed, putting her hands together and closing her eyes, taking in deep, calming breaths like Kaito always tried to show her...and then blowing out in frustration. It never helped. She wondered why she kept trying it. Maybe just because they seemed to genuinely help him when he tried it.

"It'll be fine. It has to be. I know that...you and the king wouldn't let any of them do anything to us. And I can protect them if they tried to do it anyway," Maki said, thinking of all the boys in her life that she wanted to keep safe. "Past that, it's just getting used to it, right? There's nothing else to be done."

Kokichi frowned softly, wishing that there was an answer to this. "...you guys are my friends. This is the place you're supposed to be safest, so...I'm going to do everything I can to make that true."

"...it's been a long time since some of them left," he murmured, looking out along his blankets, knowing he had been even smaller the last time Ikuo had sat beside him here. "I don't know how they've changed just from time, let alone war. But this is your home. And since they left to protect our home...then they've already committed to protecting you too."

That was a nice sentiment, but...he really couldn't say that everyone coming back would think the same way. He...really wanted Ikuo to like the Luminaries. But, after a decade apart...could he say he really still knew the man?

Kokichi's face paled and a cold wash of dread went through his body at that thought. ...Ikuo had gone to war for him. Would...would he even... Faintly, Kokichi could hear the monitor speeding up, and he tried to calm down, taking deep, steady breaths.

Kaito was in the middle of doing his hair, listening to the soft sounds of his friends murmuring to each other on the other side of the bathroom door, when his ears picked up on what was becoming a depressingly familiar sound. Quickly washing the gel off his hands, Kaito headed out of the bathroom, more than a tad frustrated as he said, worried, "Is everything..." Kaito glanced between Maki and Kokichi, seeing Kokichi starting to sweat, his pulse monitor upticking. Not quite looking like he was he heading into another attack, but...

Kaito found himself giving Maki a hard look, his back tensing as he said to his friend, "Seriously, Maki? Between you and Shuuichi...could we cool it with talks about home, please? At least for a little while?"

Maki narrowed her eyes at him, and said coldly, "I wasn't. We were discussing the front line fighters returning. Also, it's not up to you to decide what we can talk about, Kaito."

Kaito felt a flash of guilt, frowning as he reminded himself that..."Yeah, sorry, you're right, you're right," he said, as he rubbed his good hand's palm into one of his eyes, muttering, "Sorry, sorry. I didn't mean to...of course you both can. I didn't mean it. I just got worried hearing the machine...'Kichi, what's the matter, babe? Why's that got you stressed out? The fighters coming back is a good thing!"

"It is?" Maki said, raising an eyebrow at Kaito.

"Yes, it is," he replied to her sternly, the air tense between them. This was probably going to end up being fuel for another fight between them at some point in the future, but one that neither of them was willing to have in front of Kokichi. Taking a steadying breath, which did work for him, Kaito grinned in Kokichi's direction, giving him a small wink as he said, "Important people 'Kichi knows are going to be coming back. People he really cares about! That's worth being excited for!"

"Tim-" Maki started, but Kaito shook his head, cutting her off.

"No, no, I already know about that. Or, I figured, anyway. But I have a game plan! Okay?" Kaito said, taking some of the tension out of his shoulders as he gave Maki a gentler smile now, ready to appease. "Well, okay, sort of a game plan. All four of us are just going to stay out of the way for the first, like...week that the fighters are back, okay? Keep our heads down, hang out...together in one of our rooms every day...preferably a room that locks," Kaito admitted, sheepishly, looking over at Kokichi with a broad grin. "And, Kokichi can go have his reunion, enjoy their company for awhile, and...eventually, when it comes up, he can put in a good word for us. Everyone gets to come back to a happy reunion, people get time to get used to the idea that we're here, and we'll, ya know...we'll start coming out after that first week to meet people once things are settled. Easy! No problem!"

It wasn't...much of a plan. But Maki didn't actually have any better ideas so...she started absentmindedly tugging on one of her pigtails as she muttered, "I suppose that's as good an idea as any..."

Still metering out his breathing, Kokichi squinted over at Kaito, feeling something...uncomfortable with what he said. He'd at least admit that...there were things about Luminary that made Kokichi stress out, but... Just not talking about them didn't mean they didn't exist. Despite how his body reacted, Kokichi really valued how Shuuichi and Maki were upfront with him about the conditions of their home nation, and with Kaito...

...but he was just worried. He knew what was overstepping. And while he did have a point...

With a last careful breath, Kokichi sent his husband a worried, semi-annoyed look. "...I'm happy about everyone coming back...but...it's been a long time since I saw even those who left later on. They might not be the people I knew anymore..." Kokichi looked down, weakly fisting his blanket for a moment before letting go. It'd be stupid to mess his hands up again.

"...word has certainly gotten back that the war was ended in part due to our marriage, Kai-chan. They know you guys are here. ...and this is your home...I don't want to ask you guys to hide..." He sighed softly before looking up at his friends apologetically. "...but I'll be sure to explain everything to them. I'm not expecting you'll be fast friends or anything, but...I'm just hoping that this place will still feel like home to everyone."

"We're not hiding! Who's hiding? We're just...giving some breathing room!" Kaito filled in lamely, crossing his arms as his brow furrowed, tapping the back of his heel against the floor somewhat anxiously as he reasoned out, "Look, I'm just saying, like...if there was just one person coming back who maybe...felt some sort of way about Luminaries and, ya know...like, not even in a 'murder us' kind of way, ya know?"

Kaito ran a hand through his half-gelled hair, before the gel had any time to settle, and looked at his hand in mild surprise before continuing on, subconsciously pacing a little, "Like, Tim's already sort of struggling, and someone being shitty to him...and Shuuichi's so shy, if someone were to confront him, I don't know, we'd probably never even hear about it...Atua fucking save us if anyone tried intimidating Maki, that'll be a whole incident..."

"How long a period of time are we talking, Kokichi?" Maki said quietly to Kokichi as Kaito talked, deciding to ignore her friend trying to ration out his own nervousness to himself. "And who are you looking forward to returning? I've heard a few times that, unless they were exaggerating, half the guardforce to this castle alone left for the war in the last fifteen years...so I have to imagine, when the front-line fighters return, it's actually going to be a fairly substantial crowd that will be returning...are you looking forward to just returning Diceans, in a general sort of way, or are there actual individuals you're looking forward to seeing?"

Kaito continued pacing in the background, just talking to himself now. "I just think it might be a good idea to give anyone angry at us time to calm down, work through their anger, and then throw the only Luminary people around at them. That's all! That's alllll I'm-gah! Oh, come on," Kaito grumbled, having forgotten he had accidentally gotten gel on his hand and had tried putting his palm on his eye again, wincing at the sudden hair product in his eye and heading to the bathroom to clear it out with water.

If there was anyone returning that was looking for just the slightest excuse to lash out against Luminaries...there were more than enough rumors about Kaito to give them their wish. Kokichi didn't want to think that it was a possibility, but...it had been a long time. They needed to prepare for the worst outcome.

And...Kaito was definitely the biggest target for ire. Even apart from being part of the Momota family...the rumors about him were the worst. Anything about Shuuichi kind of was just him being lumped in with the others, Maki was said to be scary (which, honestly, she was) but nothing about anything she'd done, and...Tim was a kid. As much as they all could've changed, surely no one would lash out at a child.

Kokichi worried his lip for a bit before slowly answering Maki. "...the first crowd left ten years ago, another batch six... A-and I am happy for just...people to be returning...even if it's not...everyone..." He paused there, a pained expression crossing his face. There had been...a lot of letters over the years. Names of people that he knew he wasn't going to be seeing when the front-line fighters returned...

"T-two of the returning guards had been around since I was really little--Kyuu-cha--uh. Um. Kyuusaku Ainara and Sei Hayatsui. They used to play with me. But...th-the...the person I'm most looking forward to is..."

"...my nanny."

Also the person he was most afraid of seeing again, though that wasn't going to stop him from barreling towards Ikuo the second he heard the veterans had arrived.

Maki considered this, her face calm...impassive...before nodding. "Well, then, Kaito's right. The front-line fighters returning is a good thing. Once everything's calm, I'm sure it'll be nice to introduce ourselves to your caretakers. I'm looking forward to it...and while we have a moment alone," Maki said, referring to Kaito running his face under the water, "please don't feel like you need to get back to me soon. I got excited yesterday...but nothing changes in any meaningful way if we talk about this again tomorrow, or a month from now, or...longer, if that's what it takes," Maki said, with a small shrug. Then she smiled. "Besides, we have a lot of things coming up soon. We need to start making hard plans for this vacation to the beach, right? You and Kaito should start picking dates. It'll be a good time."

Maki sighed, having said her piece, and she stood up, grabbing the empty tea cup and putting it back on the vanity desk as she called out to the bathroom, "Kaito, I'm leaving. I'm going to go check on Shuuichi. Stop freaking yourself out over nothing. They're not coming back for weeks still!"

"I'm not freaking out! I am...thinking forward! And...did she leave already?" Kaito asked, coming out with a towel around his neck, seeing that Maki had, indeed, left before he could finish his thought.

Glancing over at Kokichi, Kaito laughed sheepishly. "I'm not nervous about them coming back. It's really going to be fine! I'm really looking forward to meeting your dad...do you guys exchange letters?" Kaito asked, saying it like it had just sprung to mind, and not something he'd thought about nervously, every now and again. "Like...I know it's tough to get post to and from the front lines. Did you manage to keep in touch?"

'Do you know he's actually coming back?', Kaito didn't say.

A soft frown remained on Kokichi's face, though he did feel himself calming a bit. He wanted to be able to...at least start to figure out the best way to help Luminary soon, but...if Maki was sure that time wasn't of the essence... Then he could let himself heal and properly compose his first--of what he was assuming was going to be many--letter to Kaede. Once he could be sure, once he could properly place faith in her...then they could start to change things.

So, after a moment, Kokichi offered Maki a smile in return. "If I don't get sick again, I'm kinda hoping to go soon. I can be patient, but I've been waiting a looooong time for a vacation." He laughed quietly and bade Maki a friendly farewell, wishing her a good session with Timothy.

A little of his stress returned at Kaito's questions, but...there was nothing he could do about it.

"Sometimes," he nodded. "He always tries to get a letter out around my birthday--the one from this year is..." Kokichi looked around for a moment before sighing and gesturing vaguely to the letters pinned to the wall. "Somewhere up there. ...said he was looking forward to having me tell him everything about the wedding when he came back. 'N that he'd suplex Aiichi for making it that he couldn't make it."

Kokichi giggled a little at that, eyes sad and fond and...longing. Just from that, Ikuo had sounded like...l-like he still loved him, but...he was still nervous.

Fuck. Thank god. Okay...so that was one bad thing that wasn't actually going to be a thing.

Good. Good.

Kaito felt a little better about things as he sighed, going to his side of the bed and flopping back on it, pressing the top of his head gently to Kokichi's arm as he looked up at him, giving him a small smile. "Okay... I'm glad. Sorry, I didn't mean to get weird on you. I have, like...an energy right now, you know? I feel like I want to take a nap and fight someone at the same time. Just sort of...buzzing."

Kaito had kept waking up last night from troubling dreams that he couldn't remember. He had taken a lot of comfort hearing or seeing Maki up and about when he did, and he had gone back to sleep right after every time, but each time he had woken up, he had felt more and more nervous just...generally. And now that he was up properly, the nervous energy hadn't gone away. He felt like he was missing something...or like something bad was around the corner. Or, just this...vague sense of doom, not really linked to anything but his own growing feeling of uncertainty.

Or, as he put it: buzzing.

"You seem more awake this morning, though," Kaito noticed, lifting up his good hand to take Kokichi's hand in it, rubbing his thumb over his joints soothingly. "How do you feel?"

Kokichi nodded a bit and rubbed his knuckles along Kaito's arm, offering his husband an understanding smile. Things were...weird. Even what was supposed to be their normal was weird--they'd known each other a month and had barely had time to rest. But...it was the first month of many. And while there were a lot of things going on...the vets returning...the Remnants...Luminary in general... ...things would get better. They would.

Sighing in slight relief as Kaito started rubbing his hand, he gently snuggled his whole body against Kaito. "Better than yesterday. I probably have to stay in bed still, but...I think I can be awake more than not now; 'm not as tired. Though, since I just woke up, that's not really a good indication."

"Maki-chan brought it up, but...ya wanna do some planning for the beach trip today? Just loosely, since I dunno how Shuu-chan's feelin' yet..." Kokichi trailed off for a moment, worried about the detective. He wasn't the only one who needed to heal--not to mention the heal time left on Kaito's arm.

Glancing down at his husband's cast, Kokichi sighed softly. "...do you think you'd wanna wait until you can get the cast off? You're not supposed to swim with one, and while there's plenty to do without swimming..." He shrugged, leaving the option open.

Ah, yeah. The arm. "Honestly, I'm getting to the point where I barely notice I have this on anymore," Kaito admitted, looking down at the cast slung against his chest, wiggling the fingers experimentally. "I mean, so long as I don't do the swimming thing, yeah, I could probably be fine the whole time. Man...I wish I had been thinking about how long bones take to heal when I went and got myself thrown from a horse," Kaito muttered. "The healers say I've got, what...another month of this? Delaying the trip by a whole month sounds like a bummer to me..."

Kaito lifted Kokichi's arm up, absentmindedly pressing a kiss against it as he said, "I think it'd be fine if we went with my cast still on. You said the beach was only a couple days away, right? That shouldn't be too hard a trip. And we want to get there and back before your dad gets here, right? So we could maybe plan to leave...I mean, if we're gonna go, let's just go, right? Would the end of this week be too short notice or-"

As he was saying this, there was a quick knock at the door, before Maki opened it, saying through the crack, sounding tired, "Kaito, we have an issue. Can I come in?"

"Yeah, course," the Luminary Prince said, looking over at the door as Maki opened the door open more, leaning on the frame, looking considerably more frustrated than when she had left. Kaito sat up, still holding Kokichi's hand as he said, "What's up Maki-Roll?"

"Shuuichi's doing worse," Maki said, running her hands over one of her pigtails, a clear look of concern on her face. "He came to the door this time, but...honestly, he looked like he was going to pass out just from standing there. He looks really rough. I tried to help him back to bed, but he wouldn't let me in...said he had vomited on the floor and didn't want me to see it. He's asking for that healer, down in town?"

She glanced over at Kokichi at this. "Seiko Kimura? I asked him why, but...I don't know, he got real vague. Something about finding her comforting. What do you think, Kokichi? He looked bad, I kind of want to just go get him a castle healer, but...you're more familiar with all these people. Is she worth him waiting to see her specifically?"

Kokichi wanted to prod more. To correct that, no, it hadn't just been that Kaito had gotten thrown from a horse, but he had killed a horse for no reason other than flawed ones from his stressed-out mind, and then had picked a fight with three people before being dragged to a healer, having to take heavy-duty painkillers that prevented them from diagnosing his concussion, and had driven him to OD to escape the pain.

But, no, if Kaito had only thought about how long it'd take a broken arm to heal, then he would've just not done all that. Simple.

...but he didn't need to make Kaito feel worse about everything. So, instead, Kokichi just sighed deeply. "Ideally, yeah, I'd like to go before people come back. I don't think I'd be able to just be, like, 'oh hi, nice to see you after ten years, well, I'm off to go on vacation for a week, see ya.' And I don't want to ask him to come with us either."

For one, it'd be kind of mean on his part to insist on the Luminaries hanging out with a stranger, a Dicean soldier, just because he was someone special to Kokichi. And he doubted Ikuo really wanted to go anywhere after having to be away from home for so long. The vacation was supposed to be relaxing. For everyone.

Kokichi glanced up at Maki in worry and surprise as she returned, and...far from relaxing, he felt his heart drop at the news of Shuuichi. Maybe it wasn't just a stomach bug...oh...and...he found himself remembering something from the other day.

Looking between Maki and Kaito, Kokichi thought for a few moments. "...Kai-chan...you said he looked kind of sick, that day when he got me muffins from town? And then he got drunk with Aba and the rest?"

"If...if he's been feeling bad since then...this might be something he's embarrassed about, and...is only saying something about now because it's gotten bad..."

Setting his lips in a line, Kokichi sat himself up a little more. "Dr. Kimura is really skilled--we can definitely trust that she'll help Shuu-chan to the utmost degree. And...if he's more comfortable with her, it might make things easier on him to let her help. I-I...I know you guys have talked with some of the healers because of me, but...if there's someone he asked for specifically, I think we should ask her."

Maki sighed, clearly wanting a different answer, if only because she wanted to get him help faster, and wasn't confident this woman would just...drop everything to come check up on someone who had asked her for research advice once or twice. But... "Fine. I'll cancel training this morning and head to town now. Maybe I'll catch her in a good mood and she'll agree to come up and see him. Why do all of you keep getting hurt? At this rate, I'm going to put all of you in a glass box; see how sick or injured you all will get then," Maki huffed, shaking her head as she left, clearly not willing to wait at all, not after seeing the state her friend was in.

As the door closed behind her, Kaito frowned, before turning to Kokichi, muttering, "She's...she's kidding. Obviously...okay. He did have that fever a few days ago, didn't he...okay, so, Shuuichi might be down and out for a while. But, I doubt a stomach bug will last that long, so...let's give it seven days. We'll leave exactly a week from now, be back a week from that, and that should give us a few days’ wiggle room for error by the time your people get back, right? By the time we get back, if I remember what you said right, there should probably be, what...two weeks before the next semester here starts? That's plenty of time to get Tim enrolled somewhere...probably," Kaito said with a shrug. "I think all that could work. What do you think?"

Kokichi got how Maki felt...but he still pouted a bit. It wasn't Shuuichi's fault he got sick...even if he could've told them how he was feeling earlier. Sometimes you just had to ride out whatever illness you got, but sometimes it could be stopped before it got too bad. There was no way to know what variety had hit Shuuichi, though, not unless Dr. Kimura could tell.

Kokichi sighed a bit more, just looking over at the door as Kaito spoke. "...we really gotta balance our timing, huh... But I think your idea will work, if nothing else happens." If he didn't break down again, and if Shuuichi felt better. If Kaito didn't get into any more fights or things that would leave him with injuries. If Maki didn't make herself sick over her worry for them.

Sliding down against his pillows, Kokichi cuddled up to Kaito's side, nuzzling his arm. "There's enough time...but we really should talk about what kind of schooling Tim should go into. I know it'll be good for him to acclimate, but...I'm worried about him being alone. Maybe it'll be different with people his own age." People who had only known war in their lives. Who might have parents that...

Come onnnnn. He really needed to stop stressing out so much.

Kokichi placed a soft kiss against Kaito's shoulder. "...do ya wanna make Shuu-chan a get-well card? We can just talk to him, but...sometimes it's nice to have a physical reminder right by you when you feel bad."

"Ha, yeah?" Kaito asked, raising an eyebrow at his husband, placing a quick kiss on the top of Kokichi's head, still absentmindedly massaging the joints in his hands with his thumb. "You're real cute, you know that? ...alright. We'll make one together. I'll do the physical part, you supervise. Give me one second, I'll go grab some paper."

Kissing him once more on the head, Kaito scooted off the bed, off to get the supplies they'd need.

-

Shuuichi almost hadn't made it back to the bed after Maki had left...almost. The last few steps had been sort of a series of controlled falls rather than any actual walking, but Shuuichi had managed to land onto his bed rather than the floor, and that was...ya know. That was a success.

Yeah.

Success.

She hadn't stayed much longer after the bath. She had put him to bed, reminded him of the rules...pulled his hair a little and said more terrible things to him that had made him feel small and dirty and stupid and fuck like he wanted to fuck someone...and then she had something about maybe letting Shuuichi 'drain' himself again today if he was a good patient for Dr. Kimura, and that if he wasn't, she might declare him a lost cause and just...

After awhile, when Maki was long gone and the ache in his body had eased a little, lying on the edge of the bed, Shuuichi had finally convinced himself to scoot more onto the bed, aiming for his night stand. Reaching shakily for his journal.

His handwriting was terrible as he wrote, his hands shaking...but he finally felt clear enough, calm enough, without her around to get his thoughts somewhat organized, so he started writing.

Hypothesis (reality?): Withdrawal unavoidable.

BG no longer resource. Jar gone. Trip canceled. DP only available through Her. She plans to make it purposefully dwindling resource. Withdrawal unavoidable(?). Yes. Withdrawal unavoidable= risk>reward. Reward=maybe death of Luminary + not feeling bad anymore. Always bad, always weak, always sad. Always always always. Risk=Life in Luminary (no way around this?? no. She's watching. She'll tell.). Reconditioning. Brothel(??!). Loss of Maki+Kaito. Unacceptable.

Conclusion: Withdrawal unavoidable.

Shuuichi frowned at this, taking a break from writing to read over what he had written. That...really? Really, really? There was no...there was nothing? Come on, Saihara. Think! There must be something!

He started writing again.

Hypothetical: Tell Maki + Kaito? Introduce to DP? Too late to dose, just...tell?? Kaito=Afraid. Maki=Stressed. Suggest: DP=happiness? Use invitation to happiness to entice friends to RoD? Leave castle, join Itch, go on run? Any possibility? No. Yes? DP=Happiness. Logical conclusion? Observer biased. Observer stupid. Observer fucking whore. Observer stupid fucking dirty slut who doesn't deserve friends. Observer's ruined his life, look down, look what you did to yourself, they'd never run away with you, they'll hate you, you're fucking disgusting, you've ruined your own life and now you want to take them down with you, do you think you're special to them??? you dirty fuckhole this is all your fault everything is your fault, THEY'D BE BETTER OFF WITHO

Shuuichi stopped writing. Breathing heavily. His legs curling around his junk, which twitched and jumped, reacting to the sick feeling of pleasure swirling around his stomach. He was gripping his pen too tightly. His handwriting looked warped. Too big and sprawling across the page. Insane.

He re-read what he wrote...before closing the journal, putting down his pen and burying his face in a pillow that was still soaked in sweat and tears from earlier.

...he needed help. Please...he needed help...but all he had was her and she was so scary...Kaito. Maki? Please.

Someone help.

For what it was worth, Seiko had thrown her equipment into a bag and had practically sprinted to the castle when the young woman had burst into her pharmacy and threatened her to tend to Shuuichi. Who, apparently, had fallen ill with a stomach bug that had worsened, and had specifically asked for her.

Ugh.

As a doctor, Seiko had seen a lot, but from how the librarian had described him...she needed to steel herself before seeing Shuuichi. And not just for his condition. He had lied to her. About everything. Was that why he sought her out?! Oh, find the shamed doctor, use her and make her complicit in terrorism?!?!

...but he was sick. So her anger could come later.

All of the dangerous symptoms she'd warned him about...Shuuichi was likely already feeling them. And enjoying that feeling of putting himself in so much danger. Seiko didn't agree with...well, anything Miss Umezaki had said she'd done, and she didn't like feeling like they had to control Shuuichi...but they did. If they left him alone, he'd either end up poisoning himself to death, or helping people that would be the deaths of them all.

...while he'd likely already been on Despair Pollen...Seiko's heart ached for the shy young man who had walked into her pharmacy. There had to be something she could do to fix this...

As they got to the castle, Seiko kept her head down and followed Miss Harukawa up to Shuuichi's room, taking a breath and knocking firmly on the door. "Mr. Saihara? It's Dr. Seiko Kimura...from the pharmacy? May I come in?"

He heard her call through the door, covered his mouth, felt a fresh new wave of panic...and giggled.

Oh no...this was going to be so embarrassing...

Shuuichi found himself giggling breathlessly on the bed, his eyes wide, his knees curled up against himself as he shook on the bed, staring at the door. No, no, no, she had been so nice, she had been so professional, Shuuichi had been so put together when he had talked to her...and now she was going to see him like this, oh no, no no no...

...had he left the door unlocked? Fuck...could he manage the trip to the door again?

He had to. He had to unlock the door. He had the master key that Kokichi had given them, tucked away and hidden in a sewing kit in his desk. He and Maki hadn't had a reason to use it yet, and didn't want anyone but Kokichi to know they had it in the first place, so...into the sewing kit it had gone, and had stayed there ever since, with the exception of when Maki had fetched Kokichi's medical records.

Not that a locked door could keep a determined Maki out either way...and he heard another knock at the door, this time harder, as Maki called, "Shuuichi? Open up, the doctor’s here!"

...he couldn't hide. He couldn't stay quiet and hope they went away. He had to be a good patient. It was one of the rules.

So Shuuichi forced himself out the bed. Each step was a stab of pain, a quickening of breath, his vision swimming...and all of this brought red to his cheeks, water to his mouth, excitement through his veins as, little by little, he finally got to the door and unlocked it.

Opening it up just a little, his whole body trembling from both nerves and exhaustion, Shuuichi said, "...th-thanks, Maki...d-don't come in, still, o-okay? It's...it's really bad in here...I'm sorry you have to see my room in this state, Dr. Kimura."

Dr. Kimura. No longer Seiko. Shuuichi recognized the relationship had changed.

Maki frowned, her eyes hard, but no violent intent behind them as she said softly, "Shuuichi, I can come in and help you clean up...bad smells and vomit don't bother me."

Shuuichi quickly shook his head, thinking of the pile of...whatever it was. On the floor still. Dry and disturbing and disgusting. "No, please...thank you, Maki. It would embarrass me..."

Maki pouted, grabbing at her hair and looking around, something...hurt. In her gaze, before she just nodded. "Fine. You," she said, turning to the doctor, some of that violent intent there now, a radiating heat coming off her as she narrowed her eyes. "I'll be at the last door down this hallway, by the window. That's Prince Kokichi and Prince-Consort Kaito's room. Please come see us once you're done here," she said, the request sounding distinctly not like one...before glancing with a softer gaze at Shuuichi a moment, before turning tail and heading down.

Shuuichi suddenly, desperately wanted to tell Maki that he loved her...that he was sorry for everything and that he loved her and please don't hate him for everything...but that would require admitting anything had happened, so he just held his tongue and opened the door for Dr. Kimura.

When he closed it behind her, his knees gave out the last of their strength, and he collapsed, landing hard on them, hissing between his teeth as he closed his eyes, the sound...not entirely one of pain.

Seiko's eyes widened when Shuuichi opened the door--oh fuck. She...she knew what had happened, but...she'd seen Shuuichi just the other day! And now... Startling just a bit at the young woman's fury, Seiko nodded and assured that she'd see them before...

"O-oh!" Seiko was at his side in an instant, internally grimacing at the sound he made, but...well. She was going to have to deal with a lot of that in treating him. "Sh-shuuichi...let's get you back to your bed. I...understand you're somewhat compromised right now, but if you can accurately answer some questions for me...it would be a great help."

Normally, Seiko was used to people coming to her to feel better. With Shuuichi...she wasn't sure if that would be the case at all.

Standing behind him and bracing both his arms, Seiko guided Shuuichi back to his bed, noticing the...odd stain on the floor, but not commenting on it. Miss Umezaki had given her some descriptions of some...unsettling things that had happened to Shuuichi's body.

"How long have you been taking the pollen, and about how much each time? Have you taken larger amounts at any time?"

Shuuichi was so relieved when she helped him up. There had been no way he was making the trip back. He needed more of the pollen. If he had another dose, the pain wouldn't be so bad. Whatever was wrong with him would feel better. He'd heal faster. He needed another dose.

As she helped him sit on the bed, he was about to explain this to her when...fuck, fuck, fuck, not now! Not now! She's not your boss! She's not an authority! Your information doesn't belong to her! Stop it!

It was way too late for that though, Shuuichi's vision tunneling as his eyes went wide and glassy, words spilling out of him as quickly as he could think them.

"First dose was two months ago, at the Danganronpa border, roughly 0.2-0.3 grams every dose, unmeasured. I did this for three days in a row before retiring the experiment, just trying to memorize the taste for future cases. Noticed I had a rush of energy and felt generally stronger during the three day period, but dismissed it. Three weeks ago I restarted the experiment due to a shoulder wound that left me in a near crippling amount of pain, and needed to move quickly to bring Maki to safety. Had brought the despair pollen with me as possible use against Maki, her symptoms to large doses being meekness and crying. Decided to take the same doses as the first experiment to help myself make it back on the trip. Once returned, decided to extend experiment, using same measurement. I have been taking at least one dose for three weeks, though the past week have upped dosage every other day to two doses a day, and one day had dose along with an unknown amount of beer containing similar chemicals for an unknown amount but that I counted as a dose per bottle, so three doses, and the day after that had two doses along with one dose of bottle format, so three doses. That was two days ago. Had one dose yesterday, and one dose this morning."

All of that came out in one or two breaths. When he finished, he closed his eyes and groaned, gritting his teeth.

Seiko found herself shocked by the flood of information, the...extremely clear and detailed information. Miss Umezaki had said that he seemed to be getting progressively less attentive but...all that...and how he said it...and how he seemed pained afterward...

"...I'm sorry, but...I will be needing to ask more questions. But I will try..." she trailed off as she examined the young man's body, almost absentmindedly gauging his general heart rate and temperature. How he reacted had been...he'd been conditioned. Seiko couldn't do her job if he didn't answer her questions, but triggering that reaction...

She sighed a bit. "So...you were originally using yourself as a test subject to judge the pollen's medicinal properties...but, ignorant to its properties, you got yourself addicted. And...looking at you now and from what Miss Umezaki reported...all the pain you feel now feels pleasurable, doesn't it."

"...as a physician, Shuuichi Saihara, I cannot allow your continued use of Despair Pollen, and I will be participating in your rehabilitation," Seiko said with purpose, drawing herself up. "Hopefully your body will start to self-correct as we ease you off the pollen, but...I am working on a counteragent. So...you're not alone in this, Shuuichi. I'm sorry, but you're going to get better."

For the pollen's effects, there wasn't much she could do, but for his...other injuries. "...Miss Umezaki reported some...unusual effects your anus had...in the case you've been bleeding, I can offer you some antibiotics...and a type of aloe for...your welts."

Shuuichi felt the tunnel widen, his vision clearing, could take in what she was saying...

He giggled.

It was a high, manic giggle. He put his hand over his mouth at first to cover it up, but when that didn't help, he found himself biting at his fingertips, his face blushing bright red as he looked up at her, wide eyed and manic, chewing hard on his fingers before saying, "...she told you?"

He didn't know why that had surprised him so much. Miss Nao didn't seem the shy type. But he had sort of thought...it didn't occur to him, not even once, that if she told people about what he had done, what she knew about him, that she would ever add in the things she had...

Who else would she tell?

Another high, panicked giggle ripped through Shuuichi as he, with his other free hand, started to pull at his hair absentmindedly, biting hard against his fingers as he said through them as he said, heart pounding, blood racing with excitement, "Four to five inches in girth, ya know. That's...i-is that even useful to anyone, you think? Dr. Kimura? Seiko? I could go to a brothel, but I-I'm not even sure if I'm good to f-fuck. Would that feel good to anyone, a hole like that? I-I think I ruined myself...at least back there," Shuuichi said with a another wide, horrified giggle...

...before leering up at the good doctor, a sharp smile as he reached down to brush his fingers against his crotch, his bulge more than noticeable in his pants. "But I could m-make you feel good in others ways, Dr. Kimura...you were right about that second growth, y-ya know. You can use it if you want to...I-I've never put it inside anyone else before. You could be the first to use me like that...we could do it any way you want to..."

Seiko blanched and grimaced in distaste, seeing the state Shuuichi was really in. This...seemed more in line with what Miss Umezaki had described. Still...naturally stretching to maybe five inches? Producing a lubricant from his rectum? And Miss Umezaki had said that his prostate felt so swollen that practically any movement in his lower body would progressively stimulate Shuuichi...

Glowering in annoyance, Seiko pulled Shuuichi's hands away from his hair and mouth, giving the one he had bitten a look over for broken skin...and, in practically a flash, wiping it down with a disinfectant and wrapping his fingers up.

"I am not having sex with you, Shuuichi." While, in another case, she would have him tell her the changes to his body...she already knew what was happening, and bringing more attention to his sex would likely just rile him up further. Despair Pollen turned people into sex addicts that could only find stimulation in stressors. And...to make them constantly search out those stressors...their bodies needed to...well, essentially, be able to be aroused at a moment's notice and continue to be aroused.

The effects of Shuuichi's anus and the growth of his penis were right in line with that, and...Seiko didn't really need to see the other changes to his body to know that his secondary characteristics were pumped into overdrive, and anything that could be an erogenous zone was becoming almost painfully sensitive.

Looking him over again, she sighed and looked through the bag she'd packed. "Lie down...the best thing you can do right now is to rest. I'm giving you that antibiotic...and a hydropill too. You need to keep hydrated..." She murmured more to herself as she popped into the bathroom, shuddering in disgust at the...items placed in the sink before filling a glass and returning to Shuuichi's side, pulling out a small assortment of pills for him to take.

Shuuichi frowned, heartbroken at her easy dismissal. He bet Dr. Kimura would be more fun than Miss Nao. Miss Nao was...scary. Big and overpowering and devastating in everything she said and did. But Seiko? She was thin...with thin, long bones, and tired eyes...he wondered what she would sound like...how much pressure on those thin, pretty wrists it would take to-

Shuuichi bit his lip, once again, as hard as he could. Trying to pull himself out of it. Stop. Stop. This woman was...sort of a friend. She was trying to help. She didn't deserve thoughts like that.

As a...weirdly neon pink trail of blood coated down the side of Shuuichi's face, he laid back on the bed as requested and stared up at her, voice soft and smile loopy. "Yeah...I wouldn't wanna touch me either. I'm so gross...disgusting. I'm a whore who can't convince anyone to actually let me touch them. Isn't that so funny? I'm a sexless whore. That's so stupid..." Shuuichi said with a giggle, licking the blood with his tongue, enjoying the light sting of the cut.

...then he frowned, eyes suddenly filled with concern as he said to her, urgently, "Don't tell Miss Nao I tried to sleep with you. Please? I'm not supposed to touch myself without her. It's one of the rules. I have to follow the rules. It's important. Please, Seiko? Don't tell on me?"

Without even thinking about it, Shuuichi's hands had gone idly under his shirt, just...running fingertips up and down his stomach. Licking the cut of his lip and pinching at his nipple, his face flushed red, thinking of how mad Miss Nao would be if she was told...

Seiko stared at Shuuichi's lip, bewildered. How... His blood had turned pink?! Well, no, its oxidized form had, BUT THAT STILL WASN'T ANY BETTER! There wasn't any chemical reaction she could think of that would result in that.

But that was something to study later. Quickly, Seiko wiped off Shuuichi's lip, holding a cotton pad against his lip to help clot the bite, and she practically growled at him. "Stop hurting yourself. Miss Umezaki and I agreed to do things this way so you wouldn't be committed. So you wouldn't be sent away from your friends. If you're going to cut yourself up whenever your hands and mouth are free, then I don't care about sparing feelings, I won't be keeping this a secret anymore!"

She didn't want to keep it a secret at all, not when it was so dangerous, but if Shuuichi was sent to people who, while they would care for him, didn't understand the particulars of Despair Pollen Addiction...well...not that she did either, but she was working on it...then...

Sighing, Seiko sent Shuuichi an unamused look, moving the hand that had gone to his chest away. "It looks like you're starting to touch yourself right now."

Nope, nope, nope. Nevermind. They were both scary.

Shuuichi immediately laced his hands together, flinching away from her, his gaze suddenly entirely unable to look anywhere close to her face, his heart pounding in his chest and his cock, just, aching...but she had just said a lot of things and 'sent away from your friends' rang out like a siren among it all, so Shuuichi laced his fingers together to keep himself from touching and said urgently, "Sorry, sorry, sorry."

Hoping to appease her, he glanced at the pills she had taken out. "Do you want me to eat all of those now?" he said shyly. "I can, I'll eat whatever you give me, I promise. I haven't eaten since yesterday morning."

That last part had come out without him thinking about it, and he hadn't even realized it was true until he said it...or, wait, "No, that's not true," he realized, "I did eat this morning too...but I'll still take whatever you give me."

Seiko gently dabbed at his lip until the bleeding had stopped, realizing that...this was probably going to be the most difficult case of her life. She had been about to say that, yes, she wanted him to take the medicine, but...he hadn't eaten in a day?

Though he amended that...

Propping up his head, Seiko offered the glass and pills. "...please take a sip then take these... They should help stabilize the shock your body is in, help with hydration, ease some of the pain you're in, and will prevent infection. I know you don't want some of those things, but it's what's best for you."

Pausing for a moment...no, she had to ask. "If I may, what did you have this morning? Are you full? If not...I'll ask your friends to have some broths prepared for you. Even if it's not really a stomach illness that's bothering you...you don't seem like you could handle much."

How much of just how obliterated he looked was due to his constant arousal, she didn't know, but...he needed proper nutrients. And once he could walk again, taking walks in the courtyard...or jogging if he was up for it. Shuuichi was by no means overweight, and he was displaying the muscle growth the steroid effects of the pollen had, but...his pants were looking awfully tight. Mostly around his enlarged crotch, but...she noticed a slight strain around his rear, how, in the small spaces his shirt had ridden up, the slight push of his hips against the waistband. Exercise would not only help his mood, but would likely help him acclimate to his new proportions.

"I ate me," Shuuichi said plainly, not even a giggle accompanying it, barely even thinking about it.

Look, said plainly?

Even outside of what the despair pollen was doing to him, everything that had happened yesterday and that morning was taking a toll on him, and he was just straight up a little out of it. His body was recovering from a massive physical and psychological toll, his sleep had been extremely restless, and after exerting himself while his nerves were strained by more pleasure and terror than he had ever felt in his life before, profusely sweating and burning calories with no additional food or water in the last 24 hours, he wasn't just drugged.

He was wrecked. Anyone would have difficulty keeping it together, dosed or not.

So, sitting up to take the water and the pills, taking both down as well as he could, he added in, again, without really thinking about it, not even feeling particularly despair induced by it, he said, tired, "There was a lot of me...but I'm not full, no."

...he...ate him.

...she'd ask Miss Umezaki later. For now, Shuuichi needed care.

"...okay. I'll make sure food gets to you, then." Without even really thinking about it, Seiko gently rubbed small circles into Shuuichi's back as he drank. "Small sips, Shuuichi..."

"...I know you don't want it, but...please. If anything else is hurting or uncomfortable, I want to do what I can to help. Rest, food, and water will do wonders, but anything else...?" Even if he says sex, don't leave. She couldn't leave him like this. "You need to let yourself heal, Shuuichi, otherwise you'll kill yourself before the poison does."

"...you don't know that," Shuuichi muttered bitterly, looking away from her. Clutching the glass tightly in his hands.

"I was fine. I was doing fine. The pollen makes you better," Shuuichi insisted, glaring up at her, just...frustrated that she couldn't see it. That she and Miss Nao had just...decided among themselves that this was something he needed to do. When he had been FINE before she had shown up yesterday...

...or, okay, at least more fine than he felt now.

"I had been managing. No one could even tell anything was different. My wounds were healing. My muscles getting firmer on their own. I felt good. Amazing! S-so it...it's maybe doing some other stuff too, that...I may not have noticed until recently," Shuuichi admitted, glancing down at himself, just...tired and annoyed and for FUCKS SAKE so GOD DAMN HORNY...but, "B-but it wasn't killing me! And you don't know if it ever would have."

Shuuichi tossed the glass aside when it was still half filled, letting it spill on the bed, now frustrated and lashing out as he brought his knees into his chest and looked away from her, growling out, "Fuck you. I don't want your help. I hope you fall down the stairs."

Seiko's expression tightened and she sighed quietly, just...frustrated. The pollen was insanely addictive, and highly lethal. And Shuuichi had said himself that he had been increasing his doses. In an isolated situation, the pollen would make people want to take more and more of it to "feel better" until they died from the fever.

But it wasn't just isolated, and Miss Umezaki had brought more than just the jar and her words. It...wasn't just a hypothetical that people would murder each other to feel the high of endorphins the pollen gave them instead of what they'd normally feel in response to such a...horrific act. So. People on the pollen would kill each other until those remaining overdosed.

The extinction the...the Remnants of Despair were looking for.

"You're getting my help because I don't want to see you die."

But Seiko got up to leave. Distressing him right now was...a seesaw of danger. "...so you know, your blood is bright pink, so I would advise keeping yourself unharmed if you don't want your friends asking more questions. Once I figure out a way to reverse this...I'll help you, Shuuichi. I hope I can before it's too late."

She'd tell the princes and the young woman that he had a stomach virus, and had spent so much time vomiting the day before that he'd severely dehydrated himself. He could likely stomach light broths, and would need the nutrients, and she'd leave several days of medicine to help him retain water (and the antibiotics). If he worsened, she would return, but more than anything he needed rest.

Shuuichi glared at her until she left...and then sighed when the door closed behind her. Burying his face into his knees.

After a while, the anger and hatred faded, and his body started trembling again.

...maybe Miss Nao would let him touch himself soon. If he could cum soon, he could get this under control. He could get his thoughts and body back under control. He just needed to fucking cum...

...fuck...

He really hoped she wouldn't tell Miss Nao he had told her to go fall down the stairs.

That probably counted as being a bad patient.

...it looked even worse than his regular drawings.

Kokichi pouted at the paper in his lap, staring at the wobbly blobs while he was giving his hand a break. While this wasn't the first get-well card he'd ever made, it was certainly the first he'd made while being sick himself and...

It was the worst.

While he'd been able to hold the glass with Maki earlier, it seemed that pencils were still a little too difficult for his hands...and the cacti Kokichi had tried drawing for Shuuichi just...looked like shit. Maki and Kaito could pass on his well-wishes but...between the three of them, he was the only one that couldn't visit Shuuichi since neither of them were supposed to get out of bed, and...he'd just been hoping to be able to make something nice. To give Shuuichi something that would cheer him up like the mums in Kokichi's room did for him.

But, no. They looked even worse than child's drawings.

Looking up at Kaito, Kokichi sighed. "When one of you go see him to help him with the food...tell Shuu-chan I'll draw him something actually nice when I get better. I really think this might be as good as it'll get," he wrinkled his nose in annoyance.

"Maki's gonna go get breakfast for him, but I'm gonna go help him with lunch and dinner when the healer Maki tags for the afternoon shift comes up," Kaito said, not really...saying specifically that the new plan was to just take turns taking care of Kokichi and Shuuichi now, Kaito taking the afternoon shift and Maki the morning shift, hoping that he'd be fine sleeping through the night shift without anyone watching him...but yeah. The way both the Luminaries spoke about it, it was sort of just understood that was the new plan.

Take care of Kokichi. Take care of Shuuichi. For Maki, at least, sleep could wait. It wouldn't be the first time she had stayed awake for a few days in a row. And hopefully both boys, with someone looking after them almost all the time, could recover fast enough where the new schedule wouldn't strain their friends beyond their limits.

And if not, well...they'd burn that bridge when they got to it.

Kaito snickered at Kokichi's little annoyance with his drawing, looking over from his own more or less completed letter.

(the front of the card said in big, blocky colorful letters: YOU'RE GONNA FEEL BETTER SOON BECAUSE-!!, and then when you opened the letter it was mostly just Kaito filling the paper with every single thing he could think of Shuuichi that he admired, some things funny, who else can wear a hat all day and not get hat-head!? It's magical!!, and some things serious, You found my mentor's killer when we were just kids. I've never gotten over that. You're an amazing Detective, Shuuichi. Just trying to fill every inch of the card with things that might make his friend smile and feel good about himself while he was currently too embarrassed, Maki was saying, to even see them...)

...and smiled warmly at Kokichi's drawing. "Awww, come on, babe, give yourself more credit. That's a great...um..." no, that couldn't be right... Kaito tilted his head, hoping the slightly altered perspective might... "hm...Kokichi, you didn't draw our sick friend a fuzzy dick, did you?"

Then he actually read the words that accompanied it and his eyes lit up. "Oh! Oh, it's a cactus! Of course it is! Awwww, that's cute, Kokichi. He's gonna love it."